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1
00:00:01,651 --> 00:00:03,585
[whinnies]
2
00:00:03,653 --> 00:00:05,504
Hello.
3
00:00:05,573 --> 00:00:07,956
I'm Mister Ed.
4
00:00:11,745 --> 00:00:13,890
♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪
5
00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:16,026
♪ And no one can talk
to a horse, of course ♪
6
00:00:16,050 --> 00:00:18,061
♪ That is, of course,
unless the horse ♪
7
00:00:18,085 --> 00:00:20,219
♪ Is the famous Mister Ed ♪
8
00:00:20,287 --> 00:00:22,365
♪ Go right to the source
and ask the horse ♪
9
00:00:22,389 --> 00:00:24,567
♪ He'll give you the
answer that you'll endorse ♪
10
00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:26,758
♪ He's always on
a steady course ♪
11
00:00:26,827 --> 00:00:28,827
♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪
12
00:00:33,984 --> 00:00:35,867
[Kay] Carol, where are you?
13
00:00:35,936 --> 00:00:37,702
In the kitchen.
14
00:00:40,657 --> 00:00:42,835
You shouldn't be working
with that sprained wrist.
15
00:00:42,859 --> 00:00:45,271
- I wanna get dinner ready
for Wilbur.
- Well, let me help.
16
00:00:45,295 --> 00:00:48,257
Ah, thanks, Kay. Hand me the chicken,
will you? It's in the refrigerator.
17
00:00:48,281 --> 00:00:50,348
One chicken coming up.
18
00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:55,120
[muttering]
19
00:00:56,724 --> 00:01:00,475
Poor doll. He doesn't
have a thing to wear.
20
00:01:00,544 --> 00:01:02,878
Just put it in the pot
and light the stove.
21
00:01:02,947 --> 00:01:04,813
Oh, no. The little fella's
22
00:01:04,882 --> 00:01:07,833
gone through so much already.
23
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:12,770
Sweetie, why don't you let me
prepare dinner for all of us tonight?
24
00:01:12,839 --> 00:01:16,474
You know, salad, steak,
mushrooms, apple pie.
25
00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:19,794
Thanks, Kay, but I
know you hate to cook.
26
00:01:19,863 --> 00:01:22,263
You're so right.
27
00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:24,266
We'll eat out.
I'll call Addison.
28
00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:26,401
Oh, Kay, really.
29
00:01:29,356 --> 00:01:32,090
Wilbur's on the phone.
30
00:01:32,159 --> 00:01:35,243
Thank you. I have
your address, yes.
31
00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:37,930
And, Velma, it'll just be
for the one week, huh?
32
00:01:37,998 --> 00:01:39,893
There won't be much
housekeeping to speak of.
33
00:01:39,917 --> 00:01:44,019
Most of your work is gonna
be done in the kitchen, cooking.
34
00:01:44,088 --> 00:01:46,605
All right. I'll pick
you right up.
35
00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:48,590
Thank you. Good-bye.
36
00:01:51,145 --> 00:01:54,196
Well, Ed... [sneezes]
37
00:01:54,264 --> 00:01:56,265
- Gesundheit.
- Thank you.
38
00:01:56,333 --> 00:01:59,885
Carol's gonna be surprised when
she finds out I hired a cook to help her.
39
00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:02,087
That's the trouble
with us Americans.
40
00:02:02,156 --> 00:02:03,705
We spoil our women.
41
00:02:03,774 --> 00:02:05,941
Oh, come on.
Carol's a great cook.
42
00:02:06,026 --> 00:02:08,307
You know that. It's just
that she sprained her wrist.
43
00:02:08,361 --> 00:02:10,212
Sure. How did she sprain it?
44
00:02:10,281 --> 00:02:12,380
The can opener slipped.
45
00:02:12,449 --> 00:02:14,549
[sneezes]
46
00:02:14,618 --> 00:02:16,384
Gesundheit, again.
47
00:02:16,453 --> 00:02:17,953
Thank you, Ed.
48
00:02:18,021 --> 00:02:20,889
Velma Pinkney. She
sounds very efficient.
49
00:02:20,958 --> 00:02:23,909
- Thank you very much.
- You're welcome.
50
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,311
You know, I think I'm
allergic to your hay.
51
00:02:26,380 --> 00:02:28,247
What are you complaining about?
52
00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:30,615
I have to eat this stuff.
53
00:02:32,385 --> 00:02:34,102
♪♪ [humming]
54
00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:42,844
Wilbur, did you call that
cook I recommended?
55
00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:44,891
- Just going now to pick her up.
- Good.
56
00:02:44,915 --> 00:02:46,320
Look, I hope you
didn't tell Kay about my
57
00:02:46,344 --> 00:02:47,877
surprise, because
she is sure to tell Carol.
58
00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:51,703
Oh, no, no, no. I learned my lesson
20 years ago when I told Kay a secret.
59
00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:53,666
- What secret?
- That I was single.
60
00:02:53,690 --> 00:02:55,290
I should've known.
61
00:02:55,359 --> 00:02:58,109
We want you and Kay to be
our guests tonight for dinner.
62
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,923
I mean, the way you talk about this
Velma, she must be a wonderful cook.
63
00:03:00,947 --> 00:03:03,731
Oh, she is. Great. But
that's the story of my life.
64
00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:06,345
The only time I ever get a good
home-cooked meal is when I go...
65
00:03:06,369 --> 00:03:09,254
Go to somebody else's house.
66
00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:17,378
[laughs] Married men.
67
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,299
Boy, am I glad I'm a bachelor.
68
00:03:27,724 --> 00:03:30,541
- Well, this is it, Velma.
- Mmm.
69
00:03:30,610 --> 00:03:33,278
I'll tell Mrs. Post you're
here. She'll be surprised.
70
00:03:34,915 --> 00:03:35,915
Honey?
71
00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:39,418
Carol.
72
00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:40,486
Hi, dear.
73
00:03:41,488 --> 00:03:43,038
Surprise for you, honey.
74
00:03:43,107 --> 00:03:44,987
Say hello to Velma,
our new cook.
75
00:03:45,042 --> 00:03:46,819
She's gonna be
with us for a week.
76
00:03:46,843 --> 00:03:48,743
Oh, thank you, darling.
77
00:03:48,812 --> 00:03:50,796
- Hello, Velma.
- Hello, Mrs. Post.
78
00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:51,997
[Velma chuckles]
79
00:03:52,066 --> 00:03:53,648
You happy?
80
00:03:53,717 --> 00:03:57,068
Oh, darling, you're the most
wonderful husband in the world.
81
00:03:57,137 --> 00:04:00,221
One thing about my wife,
Velma, she always tells the truth.
82
00:04:00,290 --> 00:04:01,239
[Carol chuckles]
83
00:04:01,308 --> 00:04:03,442
Oh, hang onto him, Mrs. Post.
84
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:06,061
A good man is hard to find.
85
00:04:06,129 --> 00:04:08,563
Any man is hard to find.
86
00:04:08,632 --> 00:04:12,017
At my age, even a
bad man is hard to find.
87
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,401
[Wilbur laughs]
88
00:04:13,470 --> 00:04:15,248
Well, there'll be four
for dinner tonight, Velma.
89
00:04:15,272 --> 00:04:17,305
I invited Roger and Kay over.
90
00:04:17,374 --> 00:04:18,901
Well, I know you'll
be happy here.
91
00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:20,992
- Be in my office,
dear, - Okay, dear.
92
00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:22,427
I'll show you to your room.
93
00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:24,696
Oh, what a nice man.
94
00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:25,913
[Carol chuckles]
95
00:04:25,982 --> 00:04:28,416
Mrs. Post, have you got
a butler working for you?
96
00:04:28,485 --> 00:04:29,434
No.
97
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:31,143
- A chauffeur?
- No.
98
00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:35,740
Well, on my day off, it
looks like solitaire again.
99
00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:41,296
Oh, by the way, do you
have your milk delivered?
100
00:04:41,364 --> 00:04:43,431
- Yes.
- Is the milkman married?
101
00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:44,500
Yes.
102
00:04:45,836 --> 00:04:47,602
You don't have to rub it in.
103
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:51,772
What a feast.
104
00:04:51,841 --> 00:04:53,775
Velma, the dinner is delicious.
105
00:04:53,843 --> 00:04:54,860
Oh, thank you.
106
00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:56,456
- Marvelous.
- Oh, it's perfect.
107
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,740
I could never do
anything like it.
108
00:04:57,764 --> 00:04:59,804
This wasn't a dinner.
This was a banquet.
109
00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:02,311
Oh, this meal is so
beautiful, I could wear it.
110
00:05:02,335 --> 00:05:04,113
The soup is a collector's item.
111
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,598
Oh, honey, thanks
again for Velma.
112
00:05:05,622 --> 00:05:07,400
She's the nicest present
you've ever given me.
113
00:05:07,424 --> 00:05:10,353
If she were a little smaller, I
would've had her gift-wrapped.
114
00:05:10,377 --> 00:05:12,454
Wilbur, can I open a
charge account here?
115
00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:14,712
Oh, now darling, we
mustn't take advantage.
116
00:05:14,781 --> 00:05:17,315
We shouldn't eat here over
four or five times a week.
117
00:05:17,384 --> 00:05:19,384
[Wilbur laughs]
118
00:05:20,637 --> 00:05:22,003
Baked Alaska.
119
00:05:22,072 --> 00:05:23,004
- Oh!
- Oh!
120
00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:25,323
[excited chatter]
121
00:05:25,391 --> 00:05:26,474
Beautiful, beautiful.
122
00:05:26,543 --> 00:05:29,627
Well. Your hand
should be immortalized
123
00:05:29,696 --> 00:05:31,045
at Grauman's Chinese.
124
00:05:31,114 --> 00:05:34,599
Oh, Mr. Post, thank you.
125
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,686
Oh, the good ones
are always married.
126
00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:40,266
- [Wilbur laughs] - [Roger]
Thank you. Thank you very much.
127
00:05:40,290 --> 00:05:42,491
[Roger sighs]
128
00:05:42,576 --> 00:05:45,076
Oh, Velma's such a jewel.
129
00:05:45,145 --> 00:05:47,657
- I wonder why
the Johnsons let her go.
- She quit.
130
00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:50,732
I understand she was
engaged to their butler Henry
131
00:05:50,801 --> 00:05:51,801
and they broke up.
132
00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:53,068
Oh, that's too bad.
133
00:05:53,136 --> 00:05:55,504
She's such a nice woman.
I hope she finds somebody.
134
00:05:55,589 --> 00:05:59,106
If you wouldn't mind, my
dear, I'd marry her myself.
135
00:05:59,175 --> 00:06:02,127
If she cooked
for us, I'd let you.
136
00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:03,890
Sure gonna hate to lose
her at the end of the week.
137
00:06:03,914 --> 00:06:05,491
If it'll make you feel
any better, honey,
138
00:06:05,515 --> 00:06:07,198
I'll sprain the other wrist.
139
00:06:07,267 --> 00:06:08,183
Please?
140
00:06:08,252 --> 00:06:10,084
[laughter]
141
00:06:10,153 --> 00:06:11,803
Oh, boy! Pizza!
142
00:06:11,855 --> 00:06:15,023
It's for your horse,
Mr. Post. A carrot pizza.
143
00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:17,225
For your horse?
144
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:19,227
Yeah, he loves Italian food.
145
00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:22,413
Instead of sugar cubes, I
have to feed him breadsticks.
146
00:06:22,482 --> 00:06:24,549
[Roger laughs]
147
00:06:31,324 --> 00:06:34,276
[lively chatter, laughter]
148
00:06:37,164 --> 00:06:40,381
Ah, you like Velma's pizza, huh?
149
00:06:40,450 --> 00:06:44,335
When I worked at the Johnsons',
so did my boyfriend Henry.
150
00:06:44,388 --> 00:06:46,755
He ate like a horse, too.
151
00:06:46,823 --> 00:06:49,090
He should only choke.
152
00:06:49,158 --> 00:06:52,611
Do you know I fed that man
like a king for four years?
153
00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:55,930
And what happened?
I got the brush.
154
00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:59,283
Men. Who needs 'em? Huh.
155
00:06:59,352 --> 00:07:00,435
I do.
156
00:07:00,504 --> 00:07:02,203
♪♪♪
157
00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:15,216
Henry's loss is my gain.
158
00:07:15,285 --> 00:07:18,870
Man, this pizza is molto bene.
159
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:22,440
♪♪ [humming Santa Lucia]
160
00:07:22,508 --> 00:07:25,043
♪ Santa Lucia ♪
161
00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:28,596
[continues humming]
162
00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:32,266
♪ Santa Lucia ♪
163
00:07:35,305 --> 00:07:38,389
This is your last
homemade pizza, Ed.
164
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:41,192
Carol's wrist is better,
and Velma's leaving tonight.
165
00:07:41,261 --> 00:07:42,860
Not so loud.
166
00:07:42,929 --> 00:07:46,614
I don't want my stomach to
know it's back to hay again.
167
00:07:47,734 --> 00:07:49,800
You know, she
sure fattened you up.
168
00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:50,785
[pats his side]
169
00:07:50,854 --> 00:07:52,821
Wow. Another week,
170
00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:54,316
I'd have to get
a girdle for you.
171
00:07:54,340 --> 00:07:56,374
Oh, don't let her go, Wilbur.
172
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:59,093
My friends say I
never looked better.
173
00:07:59,162 --> 00:08:01,273
We tried to talk her
into staying last night,
174
00:08:01,297 --> 00:08:03,377
but she wants a job
where she can meet men.
175
00:08:03,433 --> 00:08:07,218
All right. Throw a
U.S.O. dance for her.
176
00:08:07,287 --> 00:08:09,220
I might just do that. [chuckles]
177
00:08:09,289 --> 00:08:10,371
Last piece.
178
00:08:14,611 --> 00:08:17,023
There's only one thing that
would make her change her mind...
179
00:08:17,047 --> 00:08:18,480
If she met a man.
180
00:08:18,548 --> 00:08:21,216
And that's one thing you
can't buy at the supermarket.
181
00:08:21,285 --> 00:08:24,402
How about the
postman, Mr. Hodges?
182
00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:25,486
Married.
183
00:08:25,555 --> 00:08:26,504
The plumber?
184
00:08:26,573 --> 00:08:27,822
Married.
185
00:08:27,891 --> 00:08:30,908
Do you think she'd wait
for the newsboy to grow up?
186
00:08:31,962 --> 00:08:32,962
Here she comes.
187
00:08:34,981 --> 00:08:36,230
I'm ready to leave, Mr. Post.
188
00:08:36,299 --> 00:08:37,860
Will you drive me
to the bus station?
189
00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:42,219
Sure. Uh, Velma... if
you weren't leaving,
190
00:08:42,288 --> 00:08:45,006
what would you be
cooking for dinner tomorrow?
191
00:08:45,075 --> 00:08:47,609
Oh. Um... I was going to start
192
00:08:47,678 --> 00:08:50,829
with little individual
cheese soufflé.
193
00:08:50,897 --> 00:08:52,631
Cheese soufflé.
194
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,299
Cheese soufflé.
195
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:55,650
And then?
196
00:08:55,719 --> 00:08:58,803
Uh, artichoke hearts
with sour cream dressing.
197
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,805
Sour cream dressing.
198
00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,374
[All] Sour cream dressing.
199
00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:05,026
Then?
200
00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:06,961
My main course would be, uh,
201
00:09:07,030 --> 00:09:09,713
tornado of beef with
Béarnaise sauce.
202
00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:11,649
Béarnaise sauce.
203
00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:13,985
[All] Béarnaise sauce.
204
00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:16,321
And for dessert?
205
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:18,005
Cherries jubilee.
206
00:09:19,943 --> 00:09:21,709
[All] Cherries jubilee.
207
00:09:23,947 --> 00:09:26,348
What are we having
for dinner tomorrow?
208
00:09:26,416 --> 00:09:27,765
I'm not sure.
209
00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:29,901
The label washed off the can.
210
00:09:34,391 --> 00:09:35,706
Good-bye, Mrs. Post.
211
00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:37,842
It was so nice working for you.
212
00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:39,606
Well, if you ever
change your mind...
213
00:09:39,630 --> 00:09:40,678
[telephone rings]
214
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:41,747
Excuse me.
215
00:09:44,217 --> 00:09:45,217
Hello?
216
00:09:46,236 --> 00:09:47,568
Yes, she's here.
217
00:09:47,637 --> 00:09:48,853
Velma, it's for you.
218
00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:49,921
A man!
219
00:09:49,973 --> 00:09:51,389
A man? [gasps]
220
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:55,093
Hello?
221
00:09:55,161 --> 00:09:58,613
Yes, this is Velma. Who is this?
222
00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:00,097
Walter?
223
00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:01,182
Walter who?
224
00:10:01,251 --> 00:10:03,084
Just call me "Walter"
225
00:10:03,153 --> 00:10:05,387
until we know each other better.
226
00:10:06,473 --> 00:10:07,922
Well, who are you?
227
00:10:08,008 --> 00:10:10,441
Just a secret admirer.
228
00:10:10,510 --> 00:10:13,761
Uh, well, what do you want?
229
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:15,930
I've watched you
from a distance,
230
00:10:15,999 --> 00:10:17,715
and I adore you.
231
00:10:17,768 --> 00:10:21,285
Uh, well, I don't
speak to strange men.
232
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,703
Are you married?
233
00:10:22,772 --> 00:10:25,557
I've never trotted
down that middle aisle.
234
00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:29,611
[chuckles] He sounds
like a Harvard man.
235
00:10:29,696 --> 00:10:32,129
[syrupy sweet] What
do you have in mind?
236
00:10:32,198 --> 00:10:34,799
I'll call you tomorrow.
Will you be there?
237
00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:37,385
Of course I'll be here
tomorrow. I'll be here all week.
238
00:10:37,453 --> 00:10:39,454
I work for the Posts.
239
00:10:39,522 --> 00:10:40,971
Yes.
240
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,574
Cherries jubilee.
241
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,777
Cheese soufflé.
242
00:10:51,034 --> 00:10:51,982
Hello, Ed.
243
00:10:52,051 --> 00:10:53,811
[chuckles] Hello, Wilbur.
244
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:54,819
[Ed chuckles]
245
00:10:54,888 --> 00:10:55,936
Isn't it wonderful
246
00:10:56,005 --> 00:10:58,172
about Velma finding a
boyfriend and staying?
247
00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:01,125
Yeah. Uh, just a minute.
248
00:11:01,193 --> 00:11:03,360
Uh, here's a menu I wrote out
249
00:11:03,429 --> 00:11:05,263
for my dinner tonight.
250
00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:06,381
Menu?
251
00:11:06,450 --> 00:11:07,450
Mm-hmm.
252
00:11:08,985 --> 00:11:10,518
"Oat cocktail"?
253
00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:11,536
Mm-hmm.
254
00:11:11,605 --> 00:11:13,321
"Home-fried carrots."
255
00:11:13,407 --> 00:11:14,522
[Ed] Mmm.
256
00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:17,358
"Baked apple
with alfalfa sauce."
257
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:18,427
Ohh...
258
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:21,896
And "lobster thermidore..."
259
00:11:22,983 --> 00:11:24,515
Lobster thermidore?
260
00:11:24,584 --> 00:11:25,624
Well, that's in case
261
00:11:25,668 --> 00:11:27,084
you want to eat with me.
262
00:11:27,153 --> 00:11:28,214
Oh, you're very thoughtful.
263
00:11:28,238 --> 00:11:30,405
Just give Velma the menu
264
00:11:30,473 --> 00:11:32,607
and leave her a good tip.
265
00:11:32,676 --> 00:11:34,419
Well, later, Ed.
I got work to do.
266
00:11:34,443 --> 00:11:35,960
All right.
267
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:37,595
Lobster thermi...
268
00:11:38,681 --> 00:11:40,297
Lobster thermidore.
269
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:41,366
Mmm.
270
00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:45,420
Wilbur! Velma is leaving!
271
00:11:45,489 --> 00:11:46,971
What, again?
272
00:11:47,023 --> 00:11:48,306
[thud]
273
00:11:48,374 --> 00:11:50,353
But what happened?
She said she'd stay!
274
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:53,761
Remember that phone call she
got from that fellow Walter last night?
275
00:11:53,830 --> 00:11:56,097
Well, he didn't call
back, so she's packing.
276
00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:57,844
Maybe I'd better
have a talk with her.
277
00:11:57,868 --> 00:12:00,746
I don't think it'll do any good.
She's made up her mind.
278
00:12:00,770 --> 00:12:05,490
Well, I guess Walter has to
turn on the old charm again.
279
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:11,413
[sighs]
280
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:12,563
Velma?
281
00:12:12,632 --> 00:12:13,781
Yes, Mr. Post?
282
00:12:13,849 --> 00:12:16,567
Velma, can't we sit
down and talk this over?
283
00:12:16,636 --> 00:12:21,172
Mr. Post, the only reason I stayed, I
was expecting a call from that fella.
284
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:22,323
Walter.
285
00:12:22,392 --> 00:12:23,936
But there are other men.
286
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:26,160
Yeah, and I'm
goin' lookin' for 'em.
287
00:12:26,228 --> 00:12:28,295
Maybe I could break our TV set
288
00:12:28,364 --> 00:12:30,564
and ask for a
bachelor repairman.
289
00:12:30,633 --> 00:12:33,684
With my luck, he'd
be 90 years old.
290
00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:35,853
No. I'm ready to
go now, Mr. Post.
291
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,939
Oh. Good-bye, Mrs. Post.
292
00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:39,974
I enjoyed working for you.
293
00:12:40,042 --> 00:12:41,575
Well, good luck, Velma.
294
00:12:41,644 --> 00:12:42,805
- [telephone rings]
- Oh, wait.
295
00:12:42,829 --> 00:12:43,945
Just a minute, please?
296
00:12:47,884 --> 00:12:48,884
Hello?
297
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:52,219
Yes. She's here.
298
00:12:52,288 --> 00:12:53,604
Velma, it's for you.
299
00:12:53,673 --> 00:12:54,588
A man.
300
00:12:54,657 --> 00:12:56,307
Ohh! It must be him!
301
00:12:57,544 --> 00:12:58,475
[breathing excitedly]
302
00:12:58,544 --> 00:12:59,710
Hello?
303
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:02,112
It's me, my love. Walter.
304
00:13:02,181 --> 00:13:05,599
What happened? I
was waiting for your call.
305
00:13:05,668 --> 00:13:08,953
I, uh... I just lost my nerve.
306
00:13:09,022 --> 00:13:12,106
Aw... you're shy.
307
00:13:12,175 --> 00:13:13,190
[giggles]
308
00:13:13,259 --> 00:13:15,926
Oh, we're perfect
for each other.
309
00:13:15,979 --> 00:13:18,245
I'm shy, too.
310
00:13:18,314 --> 00:13:20,064
Cherries jubilee.
311
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:21,933
- Yeah.
- Mmm!
312
00:13:23,453 --> 00:13:25,703
Well, good-bye, my love.
313
00:13:25,771 --> 00:13:27,221
I'll call you tomorrow.
314
00:13:27,290 --> 00:13:29,791
Tomorrow? If you
don't meet me tonight,
315
00:13:29,860 --> 00:13:31,125
I won't be here.
316
00:13:31,193 --> 00:13:32,977
Uh, then it's tonight.
317
00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:36,748
I'll meet you outside
the patio after dinner.
318
00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:39,216
Good. [giggles]
319
00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:42,570
Oh, I... I hope you're as
handsome as you sound.
320
00:13:42,639 --> 00:13:46,540
I am, but it all depends
on your point of view.
321
00:13:46,609 --> 00:13:49,110
Au revoir, chérie.
322
00:13:49,178 --> 00:13:50,778
[makes loud kiss]
323
00:13:51,864 --> 00:13:52,864
[kiss]
324
00:13:58,538 --> 00:13:59,687
Almost 8:00.
325
00:14:02,492 --> 00:14:04,908
I hope that Walter shows up.
326
00:14:04,977 --> 00:14:08,329
The girls have been up there
working on Velma for an hour now.
327
00:14:08,398 --> 00:14:10,864
I certainly hope they've
prettied her up a little.
328
00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,778
Velma deserves
happiness, you know?
329
00:14:12,802 --> 00:14:14,263
She has so much to offer a man.
330
00:14:14,287 --> 00:14:16,098
- [door closes]
- Friendship, warmth,
loyalty.
331
00:14:16,122 --> 00:14:18,940
Stroganoff,
lasagna, shish kebob.
332
00:14:19,008 --> 00:14:20,888
If she leaves, I'll kill myself.
333
00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:24,762
Well, she'll be right down.
334
00:14:24,831 --> 00:14:25,913
How does she look?
335
00:14:25,982 --> 00:14:26,931
Anxious.
336
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,060
Honey, we'd better hurry
337
00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:29,311
if we're going to
make that movie.
338
00:14:29,335 --> 00:14:31,635
Yeah. Roger, would you
mind looking in on Ed?
339
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:33,382
Make sure the barn
window's closed.
340
00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:34,767
- Oh, sure, sure.
- [door closes]
341
00:14:34,791 --> 00:14:36,523
Here she comes.
342
00:14:36,592 --> 00:14:38,926
♪♪ [march]
343
00:14:41,848 --> 00:14:43,781
♪♪ [winds down comically]
344
00:14:48,354 --> 00:14:51,022
Velma, you look beautiful!
345
00:14:51,090 --> 00:14:52,435
- Oh, Mr. Post.
- Beautiful?
346
00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,442
Why, she's
positively enchanting.
347
00:14:54,510 --> 00:14:57,945
Oh... why... [giggles]
348
00:14:58,014 --> 00:14:59,508
Won't you be late for the movie?
349
00:14:59,532 --> 00:15:01,210
Oh, oh, yes. Yes. Come
on, honey. Let's go.
350
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,861
- Have a nice time, Velma.
- Thank you.
351
00:15:02,885 --> 00:15:04,363
- Good night, Velma.
- Thank you. Good night.
352
00:15:04,387 --> 00:15:06,505
- Good night.
- Velma... have fun.
353
00:15:06,556 --> 00:15:07,917
Oh, yes. [giggles]
354
00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:10,461
[Kay] Have a good
evening, Velma.
355
00:15:31,498 --> 00:15:33,798
[makes wolf whistle]
356
00:15:36,335 --> 00:15:37,852
Is that you, Walter?
357
00:15:37,921 --> 00:15:39,320
It's me.
358
00:15:39,389 --> 00:15:41,889
You look beautiful, Velma.
359
00:15:44,293 --> 00:15:47,544
Oh... why don't you come
over here where I can see you?
360
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,973
[Ed] I told you. I'm shy.
361
00:15:49,999 --> 00:15:53,284
Ohh... don't be like that.
362
00:15:56,356 --> 00:15:58,706
[seductively] We're all alone.
363
00:15:58,774 --> 00:16:01,709
Uh, don't come
any closer, Velma.
364
00:16:01,778 --> 00:16:04,194
Oh, why, Walter? Why?
365
00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:09,984
[whistling tune]
366
00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:15,572
[closing latch]
367
00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:18,192
You don't have to be that shy.
368
00:16:18,261 --> 00:16:19,476
Turn around.
369
00:16:19,545 --> 00:16:21,061
Hello, Velma.
370
00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:23,364
You!
371
00:16:23,432 --> 00:16:24,382
[gasps deeply]
372
00:16:24,451 --> 00:16:26,617
You ought to be
ashamed of yourself!
373
00:16:26,685 --> 00:16:28,051
For doing this?
374
00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:29,537
Does your wife know?
375
00:16:29,606 --> 00:16:31,117
Of course. I just told her.
376
00:16:31,141 --> 00:16:33,674
Well, I'm not that broadminded!
377
00:16:33,742 --> 00:16:34,742
Ooh!
378
00:16:37,980 --> 00:16:39,860
What's the matter
with that woman?
379
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:43,380
What's she talking
about? Broad...
380
00:16:44,788 --> 00:16:47,354
What's the matter with
me? Talking to a horse.
381
00:16:57,500 --> 00:16:59,533
He had to show up.
382
00:16:59,601 --> 00:17:02,269
Now I'm back to hay again.
383
00:17:02,338 --> 00:17:05,289
♪♪ [comic]
384
00:17:10,947 --> 00:17:11,947
Velma!
385
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,198
Is Romeo here?
386
00:17:20,306 --> 00:17:21,389
Who?
387
00:17:21,457 --> 00:17:23,558
Your husband. Our boyfriend.
388
00:17:23,626 --> 00:17:25,287
What are you talking about?
389
00:17:25,311 --> 00:17:27,323
When he complimented
me and kissed my hand,
390
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:29,514
I thought he was
only after my cooking.
391
00:17:29,582 --> 00:17:30,531
Addison?
392
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:32,344
I'll be your witness in court.
393
00:17:32,368 --> 00:17:34,802
Oh, now, just a minute.
There must be a mistake.
394
00:17:34,871 --> 00:17:38,155
Ask your husband what
happened in the backyard.
395
00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:39,239
What did happen?
396
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:40,908
Let Walter tell you.
397
00:17:40,976 --> 00:17:42,093
Walter?
398
00:17:42,162 --> 00:17:44,594
That's your husband.
399
00:17:44,663 --> 00:17:47,715
Velma... I'm sure
you must be mistaken.
400
00:17:47,784 --> 00:17:49,177
I don't want to
hurt your feelings,
401
00:17:49,201 --> 00:17:51,885
but I just can't imagine
my husband leaving me
402
00:17:51,954 --> 00:17:53,820
- for...
- For me?
403
00:17:53,889 --> 00:17:56,941
Mrs. Addison, I may
not be as pretty as you,
404
00:17:57,010 --> 00:18:00,494
but when it comes to cooking,
you can't hold a pot to me!
405
00:18:00,563 --> 00:18:02,396
Oh, now, darling, really!
406
00:18:02,465 --> 00:18:04,059
Just because I'm not a good cook
407
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,578
and my husband happens
to enjoy your cheese soufflés,
408
00:18:06,602 --> 00:18:08,297
your baked Alaska, and
your wonderful gravies,
409
00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:10,232
and... What did
happen in the backyard?
410
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:12,022
Let him tell you.
411
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:14,658
♪♪♪
412
00:18:15,712 --> 00:18:16,712
[door closes]
413
00:18:17,780 --> 00:18:19,563
Dear. It's getting late.
414
00:18:19,615 --> 00:18:20,731
Shall we turn in?
415
00:18:23,953 --> 00:18:26,353
Hey! Are... Are you crazy?
416
00:18:28,625 --> 00:18:30,265
[Velma] Get... Ohh...
417
00:18:35,631 --> 00:18:36,891
Here. Have some juice, dear.
418
00:18:36,915 --> 00:18:38,181
Thank you.
419
00:18:38,250 --> 00:18:39,500
I can't understand why Velma
420
00:18:39,569 --> 00:18:41,196
hasn't been down
to fix breakfast.
421
00:18:41,220 --> 00:18:42,853
She must've overslept.
422
00:18:42,922 --> 00:18:45,817
[chuckles] Her boyfriend
probably kept her out late.
423
00:18:45,841 --> 00:18:47,191
[door closes]
424
00:18:48,678 --> 00:18:50,945
Oh, not again!
425
00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:52,480
Mr. Post, I'm leaving!
426
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:55,366
- But, Velma,
you promised to stay.
- Velma.
427
00:18:56,919 --> 00:18:59,186
What happened? Didn't
Walter show up last night?
428
00:18:59,255 --> 00:19:01,755
Yes. Mr. Addison did!
429
00:19:01,824 --> 00:19:02,824
Addison?
430
00:19:02,875 --> 00:19:04,775
You might as well know
431
00:19:04,843 --> 00:19:07,077
your neighbor is a chaser.
432
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:08,913
Oh, Velma, really!
433
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:12,099
Underneath that mustache
you'll find a Bluebeard.
434
00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,819
Velma, I think you're
imagining all this.
435
00:19:15,888 --> 00:19:18,472
Why, Mr. Addison is
very devoted to his wife.
436
00:19:18,541 --> 00:19:20,286
Why, he wouldn't think of
looking at another woman.
437
00:19:20,310 --> 00:19:23,310
Mrs. Addison
believed me last night.
438
00:19:23,379 --> 00:19:26,697
Kay would never
believe a story like that.
439
00:19:26,766 --> 00:19:28,566
[Roger] I wouldn't say that.
440
00:19:29,318 --> 00:19:33,070
Velma... Please! Haven't
you done enough?
441
00:19:33,139 --> 00:19:34,483
Roger, what's going on here?
442
00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:37,308
She told Kay the
most fantastic story
443
00:19:37,376 --> 00:19:39,543
how... h-how I... uh...
444
00:19:39,612 --> 00:19:41,945
Why don't you take your
crummy pizzas and go.
445
00:19:41,998 --> 00:19:44,565
Oh, now, Roger, just a minute!
446
00:19:44,634 --> 00:19:46,500
Her pizzas are not crummy.
447
00:19:46,569 --> 00:19:49,236
I'm going home to Mother!
448
00:19:49,304 --> 00:19:50,621
Oh, now, Kay, dear...
449
00:19:50,673 --> 00:19:53,240
I hope that you and
Velma and her soufflés,
450
00:19:53,309 --> 00:19:55,709
the three of you,
will be very happy!
451
00:19:55,778 --> 00:19:56,960
Oh, Kay, please.
452
00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:58,562
Now, just a minute, Kay.
453
00:19:58,631 --> 00:20:01,548
I'm sure there's a perfectly
logical explanation for this.
454
00:20:01,617 --> 00:20:03,167
Tell her, Roger.
455
00:20:04,837 --> 00:20:06,553
Of course I'm Walter.
456
00:20:06,622 --> 00:20:08,489
I've been Walter for 20 years.
457
00:20:08,558 --> 00:20:11,441
I am also Booby, and
I'm... I'm Jack the Ripper.
458
00:20:11,510 --> 00:20:13,390
- I'm... I'm...
- [telephone rings]
459
00:20:14,663 --> 00:20:16,113
Hello?
460
00:20:16,182 --> 00:20:18,115
Y-Yes. She's here.
461
00:20:18,184 --> 00:20:20,284
Velma, it's for you.
462
00:20:20,353 --> 00:20:21,435
A man!
463
00:20:24,523 --> 00:20:25,706
Hello?
464
00:20:25,775 --> 00:20:27,674
It's me... Walter.
465
00:20:28,961 --> 00:20:30,277
Walter?!
466
00:20:32,348 --> 00:20:33,964
What happened last night?
467
00:20:34,032 --> 00:20:36,066
See? It couldn't
have been Roger.
468
00:20:36,135 --> 00:20:40,270
I never doubted you for
a minute, doll. I'm sorry.
469
00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:41,354
You're sorry.
470
00:20:43,525 --> 00:20:45,977
I don't know who she
was talking to last night.
471
00:20:46,045 --> 00:20:48,278
There... There was
just me and the horse.
472
00:20:53,386 --> 00:20:54,918
What did you say, Walter?
473
00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:59,357
I'm sorry I had to leave so
suddenly last night, Velma.
474
00:20:59,425 --> 00:21:02,977
Yes? Well... I'll
try to understand.
475
00:21:03,045 --> 00:21:05,279
I don't think I'm
good enough for you.
476
00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:06,296
Oh, Walter.
477
00:21:06,365 --> 00:21:08,332
Well, I'm kind of a drifter.
478
00:21:09,385 --> 00:21:13,087
You need a man
with a steady job.
479
00:21:13,155 --> 00:21:16,540
A fine girl like you
needs a real man.
480
00:21:16,608 --> 00:21:19,309
- Oh, Walter.
- My trouble is... Yes?
481
00:21:19,378 --> 00:21:20,938
- Uh-oh.
- Yes?
482
00:21:21,897 --> 00:21:23,280
[Ed clears throat]
483
00:21:25,518 --> 00:21:26,433
Hello?
484
00:21:26,502 --> 00:21:28,869
Wal... Hello!
485
00:21:28,938 --> 00:21:30,938
Oh, he hung up!
486
00:21:31,007 --> 00:21:33,440
Oh, now I'm all mixed up!
487
00:21:33,509 --> 00:21:36,260
- [sobs]
- Oh, Velma,
now, sit down.
488
00:21:36,329 --> 00:21:38,628
Don't you worry.
Now, just calm down.
489
00:21:38,697 --> 00:21:39,780
[doorbell]
490
00:21:39,849 --> 00:21:41,426
Excuse me a minute, please.
491
00:21:41,450 --> 00:21:45,102
[sobbing]
492
00:21:48,524 --> 00:21:51,175
How do you do? I'm Henry Gibson.
493
00:21:51,244 --> 00:21:54,211
I work for the Johnsons.
Is Miss Velma in?
494
00:21:54,279 --> 00:21:56,313
Yes. Velma?
495
00:21:56,382 --> 00:21:57,382
Come in, please.
496
00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:02,720
Well, this is the worst
trick you have ever pulled.
497
00:22:02,789 --> 00:22:03,871
But, Wilbur, I...
498
00:22:03,939 --> 00:22:05,383
You know you broke
that woman's heart?
499
00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:07,352
- But, Wilbur...
- And look what you did to the Addisons.
500
00:22:07,376 --> 00:22:09,555
- But, Wilbur...
- All because of your big appetite.
501
00:22:09,579 --> 00:22:10,661
- But, Wilbur.
502
00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:12,996
All right. Go
ahead. It's your turn.
503
00:22:13,065 --> 00:22:16,149
If only Perry Mason
were here to defend me.
504
00:22:16,218 --> 00:22:18,952
You ought to be
ashamed of yourself.
505
00:22:20,756 --> 00:22:22,172
[Ed snorts loudly]
506
00:22:22,241 --> 00:22:25,258
[Carol] Wilbur! Wilbur!
507
00:22:25,327 --> 00:22:28,546
Guess what. Velma is engaged.
508
00:22:28,614 --> 00:22:30,181
To Roger?
509
00:22:30,249 --> 00:22:33,868
Oh, stop. Henry, the Johnsons'
butler that she was going with,
510
00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:35,836
just showed up and proposed.
511
00:22:35,905 --> 00:22:37,521
Well, that's wonderful!
512
00:22:37,590 --> 00:22:39,167
Come on. She wants
you to meet him.
513
00:22:39,191 --> 00:22:40,936
Yeah, well, I'll... I'll be
there in a minute, honey.
514
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:41,960
Uh...
515
00:22:46,682 --> 00:22:47,965
This is lucky for you.
516
00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:49,150
But, Wilbur...
517
00:22:49,218 --> 00:22:50,728
I was gonna send
you to bed tonight
518
00:22:50,752 --> 00:22:51,769
without any supper.
519
00:22:51,837 --> 00:22:53,620
But, Wilbur!
520
00:22:53,689 --> 00:22:55,822
Who do you think
called the Johnsons
521
00:22:55,891 --> 00:22:58,975
and got Henry Gibson
over here to propose?
522
00:22:59,044 --> 00:23:00,677
You!
523
00:23:00,746 --> 00:23:02,096
How did you do it?
524
00:23:02,165 --> 00:23:05,349
I told him somebody
was runnin' off with his girl
525
00:23:05,418 --> 00:23:08,969
and if he liked her cookin',
he'd better hurry right over.
526
00:23:09,038 --> 00:23:11,588
Ed, why didn't you tell me?
527
00:23:11,657 --> 00:23:13,407
Because you bawled me out.
528
00:23:13,492 --> 00:23:14,140
But, Ed...
529
00:23:14,164 --> 00:23:16,910
Besides, who can get a
word in with you around?
530
00:23:16,978 --> 00:23:20,331
- But, Ed...
- You're always jumping to conclusions.
531
00:23:20,399 --> 00:23:23,166
- But, Ed...
- "But Ed, but Ed, but, Ed."
532
00:23:23,219 --> 00:23:25,686
Is that all you can say?
533
00:23:26,772 --> 00:23:30,757
But, Ed... ♪♪ [comedic]
534
00:23:34,346 --> 00:23:37,266
May I propose a toast to
Kay's first home-cooked meal?
535
00:23:37,332 --> 00:23:38,282
- Well...
- [Kay chuckles]
536
00:23:38,351 --> 00:23:39,266
Thank you very much.
537
00:23:39,334 --> 00:23:40,817
Congratulations, Kay.
538
00:23:40,886 --> 00:23:42,102
Hope it's all right.
539
00:23:43,839 --> 00:23:44,839
[Kay] Ah.
540
00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:48,275
[crunch]
541
00:23:48,343 --> 00:23:50,277
♪♪ [comedic]
542
00:24:00,039 --> 00:24:03,657
Well... so much
for experimentation.
543
00:24:04,944 --> 00:24:07,928
Well, it's... not really... bad.
544
00:24:07,997 --> 00:24:10,163
Once you get it down.
545
00:24:11,484 --> 00:24:14,150
My dear, no... no
offense, but, uh...
546
00:24:14,219 --> 00:24:15,797
would you mind if we celebrated
547
00:24:15,821 --> 00:24:18,188
your first home-cooked
dinner at Pierre's Restaurant?
548
00:24:19,642 --> 00:24:22,726
Why, doll, I've already
made the reservations.
549
00:24:22,795 --> 00:24:24,094
[silverware clattering]
550
00:24:24,163 --> 00:24:26,896
[chatter, laughter]
551
00:24:26,965 --> 00:24:28,465
My darling.
552
00:24:28,533 --> 00:24:29,750
[laughter]
553
00:24:29,819 --> 00:24:32,386
Hmm. They're off
to a fancy restaurant,
554
00:24:32,455 --> 00:24:34,905
and I'm back to
barn-cooked meals.
555
00:24:38,527 --> 00:24:41,487
Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA
556
00:24:42,832 --> 00:24:44,943
♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪
557
00:24:44,967 --> 00:24:47,233
♪ And no one can talk
to a horse, of course ♪
558
00:24:47,302 --> 00:24:49,347
♪ That is, of course,
unless the horse ♪
559
00:24:49,371 --> 00:24:51,371
♪ Is the famous Mister Ed ♪
560
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,551
♪ Go right to the source
and ask the horse ♪
561
00:24:53,575 --> 00:24:54,669
♪ He'll give you the answer ♪
562
00:24:54,693 --> 00:24:55,943
♪ That you'll endorse ♪
563
00:24:56,012 --> 00:24:57,923
♪ He's always on
a steady course ♪
564
00:24:57,947 --> 00:25:00,046
♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪
565
00:25:00,115 --> 00:25:02,048
♪ People yakkity-yak a streak ♪
566
00:25:02,117 --> 00:25:04,151
♪ And waste your time of day ♪
567
00:25:04,219 --> 00:25:06,202
♪ But Mister Ed
will never speak ♪
568
00:25:06,271 --> 00:25:08,371
♪ Unless he has
something to say ♪
569
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:10,640
♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪
570
00:25:10,693 --> 00:25:12,754
♪ And this one will talk
till his voice is hoarse ♪
571
00:25:12,778 --> 00:25:15,395
♪ You never heard
of a talking horse? ♪
572
00:25:16,749 --> 00:25:19,115
♪ Well, listen to this ♪
573
00:25:19,184 --> 00:25:22,819
[Mister Ed] ♪ I am Mister Ed ♪
574
00:25:27,660 --> 00:25:30,780
[Announcer] This has been a
Filmways television presentation.
37561
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