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1
00:00:01,401 --> 00:00:05,038
[music]
2
00:00:05,271 --> 00:00:07,707
Jeremy, there's an old saying.
3
00:00:08,041 --> 00:00:10,377
There's nothing sexier
than a man
4
00:00:10,377 --> 00:00:12,712
who can fix things with his
bare hands.
5
00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:15,348
So why didn't you marry a
handyman?
6
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,384
All your husbands
were filthy rich.
7
00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:18,718
Ah, yes.
8
00:00:18,718 --> 00:00:21,287
The saying is actually there's
nothing sexier than a man
9
00:00:21,287 --> 00:00:25,158
who can pay other men to fix
things with their bare hands.
10
00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:26,760
Thanks for the reminder.
11
00:00:27,327 --> 00:00:28,361
Okay.
12
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:32,065
-Hey, babe.
-Hey, you.
13
00:00:39,739 --> 00:00:41,007
What's that for?
14
00:00:41,474 --> 00:00:43,309
What, a wife can't just
kiss her husband?
15
00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:45,545
We've been married long enough
to know
16
00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:47,647
when you bopping and
kissing on me like that,
17
00:00:48,014 --> 00:00:49,616
you want something.
18
00:00:49,616 --> 00:00:50,984
Guilty as charged.
19
00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,186
Mm-hmm. Let me guess.
A water bottle?
20
00:00:54,287 --> 00:00:56,222
Spoiler alert,
you don't need one.
21
00:00:56,790 --> 00:00:58,625
Look, look at that.
Look.
22
00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:01,561
Look. Look at all these bottles.
23
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:02,729
Why?
24
00:01:02,729 --> 00:01:04,264
You can literally hydrate
the Atlanta Falcons.
25
00:01:04,931 --> 00:01:07,967
Jeremy, in the female language,
'want' and 'need' are synonyms.
26
00:01:07,967 --> 00:01:12,405
And as her husband, it is your
job to give her what she wants,
27
00:01:12,672 --> 00:01:13,773
whatever it is.
28
00:01:14,140 --> 00:01:16,075
Thank you,
Miss Anastasia, but no.
29
00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:17,977
I don't want a new water bottle.
30
00:01:17,977 --> 00:01:20,947
Although, they did come out with
this new stainless steel one
31
00:01:20,947 --> 00:01:24,083
in pink that would be so cute
with my workout sneakers.
32
00:01:24,517 --> 00:01:26,219
Translation: she needs it.
33
00:01:26,786 --> 00:01:29,222
No, no, seriously.
Okay, forget the water bottle.
34
00:01:29,722 --> 00:01:34,961
I was actually thinking
that, um...
35
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:38,298
-I want...
-You want...
36
00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:43,837
-You know what?
-What? What?
37
00:01:43,837 --> 00:01:45,872
Can you sit down for this one?
38
00:01:46,206 --> 00:01:47,974
No, I'm not sitting down.
Tell me what you want.
39
00:01:48,308 --> 00:01:49,576
What is it now?
40
00:01:52,178 --> 00:01:55,181
Not now, per se.
41
00:01:55,982 --> 00:01:59,285
More like in nine months.
42
00:02:01,654 --> 00:02:02,589
Hell no!
43
00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:05,558
Hell yes!
I want a baby, Jeremy.
44
00:02:05,558 --> 00:02:08,261
Why do you want a baby?
Where's this even coming from?
45
00:02:08,261 --> 00:02:10,463
I don't know.
I don't know.
46
00:02:10,463 --> 00:02:12,198
I mean, Philip is always gone,
47
00:02:12,198 --> 00:02:15,201
and Sandra hardly ever
calls me anymore.
48
00:02:15,535 --> 00:02:17,670
Sandra calls you
three times a day.
49
00:02:18,404 --> 00:02:20,707
I prefer four to five.
50
00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:27,747
Miss Anastasia, what you think?
51
00:02:29,048 --> 00:02:31,384
A girl wants something,
she needs it.
52
00:02:32,151 --> 00:02:34,687
Yes, queen! See?
53
00:02:35,188 --> 00:02:36,923
Mama wants a baby.
54
00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:39,459
That means mama needs a baby,
55
00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:43,296
and it is your job
to put it in my belly.
56
00:02:44,063 --> 00:02:45,565
Whatever, man, fine.
57
00:02:45,865 --> 00:02:48,635
Yay! So excited!
58
00:02:54,474 --> 00:02:57,010
♪ No matter what you do,
I love you ♪
59
00:02:57,477 --> 00:03:00,914
♪ No matter where you go,
I'm behind you for sure ♪
60
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:03,416
♪ Always remember,
blood ain't never water ♪
61
00:03:03,416 --> 00:03:06,887
♪ We'll make it
if we stay together ♪
62
00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:11,992
Vinny, who are you texting?
Your parole officer?
63
00:03:11,992 --> 00:03:15,061
I'm texting your mama in hell.
She says she misses me.
64
00:03:15,428 --> 00:03:17,530
You're lying.
My mama in heaven with Jesus.
65
00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:20,400
That would explain all
my long distance phone charges.
66
00:03:21,067 --> 00:03:22,636
Anyway, Vinny, how I look?
67
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:24,437
Like you always look.
68
00:03:24,437 --> 00:03:26,973
Like a bald eagle
ran into a box of crayons.
69
00:03:27,407 --> 00:03:28,975
Vinny, don't play with
my emotions.
70
00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:30,477
I'm already nervous.
71
00:03:30,477 --> 00:03:32,746
Miss Kim, she's bringing her
grandson over here
72
00:03:32,746 --> 00:03:34,080
to meet me
for the first time,
73
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,582
and I want him to like me.
74
00:03:35,582 --> 00:03:38,685
Well, you in luck, Brown,
because kids, they like clowns.
75
00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:43,056
Vinny, shut up! The boy had to
come live with her,
76
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,624
and I want him to like me.
77
00:03:44,624 --> 00:03:47,060
You know if he don't like me,
then she might quit me again.
78
00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:48,929
[doorbell rings]
79
00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:50,964
I don't want her to quit me,
'cause you know how that go.
80
00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:55,969
Hello, Leroy, Vincent.
This is my grandson, Theodore.
81
00:03:55,969 --> 00:03:57,370
Pleasure to meet you, sir.
82
00:03:57,370 --> 00:03:59,339
Nice to meet you, Theodore.
I heard a lot about you.
83
00:03:59,339 --> 00:04:00,774
Good things, I trust?
84
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:04,110
Well, she didn't tell me you had
big hair like a lion.
85
00:04:04,110 --> 00:04:06,446
[roars]
I like it, though.
86
00:04:06,446 --> 00:04:09,883
Yeah, this boy is polite,
like them kids from the 1800s.
87
00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:12,419
Like he was on the Little House
on the Prairie or something.
88
00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:15,288
When his mother asked me
to take him in for a spell
89
00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:17,824
so she could
get her affairs in order,
90
00:04:18,158 --> 00:04:19,993
I must admit
I was a bit nervous,
91
00:04:19,993 --> 00:04:22,562
but Theodore has been
wonderful from day one.
92
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:23,863
[Brown] Well, that's good.
93
00:04:23,863 --> 00:04:25,532
We finally get
to spend a little time together.
94
00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:27,133
Give me five. Okay, like that.
95
00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:28,635
[phone beeps]
Oh, no.
96
00:04:29,636 --> 00:04:31,237
It seems there's an emergency
at the school
97
00:04:31,237 --> 00:04:32,472
that I must attend to.
98
00:04:32,472 --> 00:04:34,374
That sounds like a setup to me.
99
00:04:35,508 --> 00:04:37,544
Leroy, I hate
to put you in this position,
100
00:04:37,544 --> 00:04:40,313
but would you mind watching
Theodore for an hour or so?
101
00:04:40,647 --> 00:04:43,416
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It'll give us a chance to bond.
102
00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:45,852
Become friends
and stuff like that.
103
00:04:46,686 --> 00:04:49,055
What kind of stuff do you like,
little man?
104
00:04:49,055 --> 00:04:50,690
I like chess. Do you like chess?
105
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:52,859
Well, I'm not much
of a "chess" man.
106
00:04:52,859 --> 00:04:53,927
I'm more into legs.
107
00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:56,229
He's talking about
chess the game, fool.
108
00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:58,798
-Oh! Like with the horse?
-Yeah.
109
00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:00,834
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Efe got one of them.
110
00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:01,835
We can play that.
111
00:05:01,835 --> 00:05:04,204
Well, I can't wait
to hear who wins.
112
00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:05,872
Thank you, Leroy.
I won't be long.
113
00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:08,641
Okay, I hope not.
We'll have fun.
114
00:05:09,542 --> 00:05:11,177
The boy likes chess.
Let's see, man.
115
00:05:11,177 --> 00:05:14,280
When I was his age, I was into
naked pictures and shoplifting.
116
00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:17,117
Brother, sure hope you got
your clean drawers on.
117
00:05:17,517 --> 00:05:19,386
That boy's gonna beat
the pants off of you.
118
00:05:19,386 --> 00:05:21,054
Okay, I'm gonna get
the chess board.
119
00:05:21,054 --> 00:05:22,922
You promise you're gonna
take it easy on me, okay?
120
00:05:22,922 --> 00:05:25,525
[deeper voice] I hate chess.
We're gonna play cowboys!
121
00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:28,294
What the what?
122
00:05:28,294 --> 00:05:31,664
And for lunch, I want a banana
split, extra whip, no sprinkles.
123
00:05:32,298 --> 00:05:34,401
Okay, who are you
and what you doing--
124
00:05:34,401 --> 00:05:36,069
Ice cream, mouth, now!
Hurry!
125
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:38,772
Oh, so you think because
your grandmama not here,
126
00:05:38,772 --> 00:05:41,241
you're just gonna moonwalk
all over me?
127
00:05:41,241 --> 00:05:42,876
Is that what you think?
128
00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:44,577
-Bring it on.
-You bring it on.
129
00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:47,881
-You bring it on
-You...bring it on.
130
00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:52,318
The faucet is still not fixed?
131
00:05:52,719 --> 00:05:56,189
Hey, mankind built a rocket
and traveled to the moon
132
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,357
faster than this.
133
00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:58,858
Yeah, well,
the astronauts' problems
134
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:00,627
weren't as out of this world
as mine.
135
00:06:01,661 --> 00:06:03,063
Of what do you speak, Jeremy?
136
00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:07,100
Come, tell your troubles
to the wise and handsome Efe.
137
00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:10,603
Leah want to have another baby.
138
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:12,972
Huh? Run.
139
00:06:13,807 --> 00:06:16,509
Run like a cheetah propelled
by hurricane winds.
140
00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:18,144
Man, I can't run. I'm married.
141
00:06:18,144 --> 00:06:20,380
All I can do is shuffle
in whatever direction
142
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:21,781
my wife point me in.
143
00:06:22,148 --> 00:06:23,416
I told her we would try.
144
00:06:23,416 --> 00:06:25,885
Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy.
145
00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:27,454
How many times did I call
your name?
146
00:06:27,454 --> 00:06:28,822
Three.
147
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:31,091
It is your seed that fertilizes
the flower.
148
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:35,295
If you do not want to grow one,
do not plant one in the soil.
149
00:06:35,295 --> 00:06:38,131
Man, that's easy for you to say.
You ain't got no women.
150
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,600
Leah want a baby.
151
00:06:41,167 --> 00:06:43,570
So she going to get
my seed one way or another.
152
00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:45,638
Not if you use your head.
153
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:50,310
When she tries to take you to
the matrimonial bed
154
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:52,579
to have her way with you,
155
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,181
you simply pretend
you have a headache.
156
00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:57,784
Man, that might work
for a day or two.
157
00:06:57,784 --> 00:06:59,619
I can't pretend I have
a headache every day.
158
00:06:59,619 --> 00:07:01,488
Oh, but you can have a backache
or a toothache.
159
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:03,590
A man has 78 body parts.
160
00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,792
That's not gonna work.
She'll catch on.
161
00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:08,728
Then you change the script.
Say you have a faucet to fix.
162
00:07:08,728 --> 00:07:11,131
There are 97 appliances
in this facility.
163
00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:14,067
You know a lot of weird facts.
164
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:16,703
Hey, Jeremy.
165
00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:25,245
I have something I need you
to fix in the bedroom.
166
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:29,616
-What thing?
-Come with me and I'll show you.
167
00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:34,154
Ah! Ah! Ah!
168
00:07:34,154 --> 00:07:35,722
-Ah, man.
-What?
169
00:07:35,722 --> 00:07:38,124
My head is going to explode,
I have a headache.
170
00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:39,559
I don't know what happened.
171
00:07:39,559 --> 00:07:41,961
Oh, well, you better take a
pain pill and come on upstairs.
172
00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:43,696
[Leah] Get on upstairs.
173
00:07:43,696 --> 00:07:46,499
Ah! Ah! Oh, my back.
174
00:07:46,499 --> 00:07:48,601
Not my back, too.
I'm getting old, baby.
175
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:52,238
Oh, and my elbow?
176
00:07:52,238 --> 00:07:53,840
-Your elbow?
-Yeah, my elbow.
177
00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:57,076
You know, I had a little old
tennis injury back there.
178
00:07:57,076 --> 00:07:58,778
See, that hurt when I did it
just then.
179
00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,580
Jeremy, you never even
played tennis.
180
00:08:01,181 --> 00:08:02,682
Okay, all right.
181
00:08:03,449 --> 00:08:05,485
And I got to
fix the faucet because Efe
182
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,520
been complaining about that
a lot lately.
183
00:08:07,787 --> 00:08:09,722
You know what? Fine, Jeremy.
184
00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:13,226
-The faucet and my back, baby.
-Yeah, okay, faucet.
185
00:08:15,929 --> 00:08:19,132
-That was close. Yeah.
-Fix the faucet.
186
00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:28,208
[muffled screaming]
187
00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:33,179
[muffled screaming continues]
188
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,250
You okay there, Mr. Brown?
189
00:08:37,784 --> 00:08:41,921
Oh, I heard you were babysitting
Miss Kimberly's grandson.
190
00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:43,756
You must be Theodore.
191
00:08:43,756 --> 00:08:45,825
Yes, ma'am.
We're playing cowboys.
192
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,628
I'm the sheriff.
He's the bad guy, Brown Bart.
193
00:08:48,628 --> 00:08:52,098
Oh, how fun. Yeah.
194
00:08:52,765 --> 00:08:54,867
Shush, Brown Bart.
195
00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:57,403
You varmint.
196
00:08:57,403 --> 00:08:58,938
Prisoners aren't allowed
to talk.
197
00:09:00,006 --> 00:09:02,775
Well, Theodore, enjoy
the fun while you can, babe.
198
00:09:03,243 --> 00:09:06,179
One day you'll grow up
and never get anything you want.
199
00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:09,082
[muffled screaming]
200
00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:12,719
Help!
201
00:09:13,519 --> 00:09:16,189
Help!
I've been tied up by Chucky!
202
00:09:20,469 --> 00:09:24,039
Leah, what's colored you
so blue?
203
00:09:25,541 --> 00:09:29,978
I practically threw myself at
Jeremy and he didn't even blink.
204
00:09:30,746 --> 00:09:32,815
I guess I lost my touch.
205
00:09:33,182 --> 00:09:36,618
Please, darling.
A woman never loses her touch.
206
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:41,023
I played a 6,000-year-old mummy
in the film Mummy Dearest ,
207
00:09:41,023 --> 00:09:43,559
and men still sent me
horny fan mail.
208
00:09:44,026 --> 00:09:47,062
Why, one fan even said he'd beat
the dust off my ancient--
209
00:09:47,062 --> 00:09:51,567
Whoa! Oh, okay.
All right. That's enough.
210
00:09:51,567 --> 00:09:53,502
I, um, I don't know.
211
00:09:53,502 --> 00:09:55,304
I guess men
will sleep with anything.
212
00:09:55,704 --> 00:09:57,005
Living or undead.
213
00:10:00,676 --> 00:10:02,377
So what's up with Jeremy, then?
214
00:10:02,845 --> 00:10:05,981
So what's the problem?
Just seduce him.
215
00:10:06,782 --> 00:10:10,886
Easy for you to say.
You're a sexy Hollywood starlet.
216
00:10:11,453 --> 00:10:12,955
You do have a point.
217
00:10:13,555 --> 00:10:15,791
But I can teach you
my techniques
218
00:10:15,791 --> 00:10:18,026
so that no living man
can resist.
219
00:10:18,594 --> 00:10:19,761
Come on.
220
00:10:21,163 --> 00:10:22,831
Now do as I do.
221
00:10:25,434 --> 00:10:26,935
-First.
-Mm-hmm.
222
00:10:27,569 --> 00:10:30,372
Gaze into your target's eyes,
223
00:10:31,039 --> 00:10:32,207
seductively.
224
00:10:33,075 --> 00:10:36,044
Imagine he's a
fresh dish of caviar.
225
00:10:36,044 --> 00:10:37,980
Ew! I don't eat fish eggs.
226
00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:39,815
Then pretend he's
gas station nachos
227
00:10:39,815 --> 00:10:41,416
or whatever you enjoy
eating there.
228
00:10:41,416 --> 00:10:43,318
Nachos? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
229
00:10:43,819 --> 00:10:45,954
Then pout your lips.
230
00:10:45,954 --> 00:10:48,257
Arch your brow just slightly,
231
00:10:48,257 --> 00:10:50,993
indicating sophistication
and intrigue.
232
00:10:51,460 --> 00:10:53,328
Sophistication and intrigue?
233
00:11:01,303 --> 00:11:04,172
You know...
Hey what's wrong with your face?
234
00:11:05,107 --> 00:11:06,808
You drunk some milk, didn't you?
235
00:11:06,808 --> 00:11:08,777
You know that milk give you
the bubble guts, babe.
236
00:11:08,777 --> 00:11:10,045
Why you do that again?
237
00:11:10,045 --> 00:11:11,413
Stop doing that to yourself.
What's going on?
238
00:11:11,413 --> 00:11:13,315
No, I'm not having an allergic
reaction, Jeremy.
239
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:15,584
I'm getting tips from an expert
240
00:11:15,584 --> 00:11:18,220
on how to seduce
my own frickin' husband.
241
00:11:18,220 --> 00:11:19,488
So embarrassing.
242
00:11:19,488 --> 00:11:21,757
You have nothing to be
embarrassed about, darling.
243
00:11:22,324 --> 00:11:25,093
Me teaching the art of seduction
was as doomed to fail
244
00:11:25,093 --> 00:11:27,796
as Michael Jordan trying to
teach an Average Joe
245
00:11:27,796 --> 00:11:29,164
to dunk a basketball.
246
00:11:29,164 --> 00:11:31,333
I'll leave you lovebirds to it.
247
00:11:32,734 --> 00:11:34,937
I can't believe I have to
take acting lessons
248
00:11:34,937 --> 00:11:36,939
on how to seduce my husband.
249
00:11:39,841 --> 00:11:41,944
Babe, you don't. All right?
250
00:11:41,944 --> 00:11:44,346
Look, now I made
the backache thing up.
251
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:46,782
Because I thought about it
some more,
252
00:11:46,782 --> 00:11:48,517
and I really just don't want
to have a baby.
253
00:11:49,017 --> 00:11:51,053
Okay, well, why didn't you just
tell me that?
254
00:11:51,820 --> 00:11:53,588
I just didn't want you being
all upset and stuff,
255
00:11:53,588 --> 00:11:56,591
and sometimes it's better to
just go along with it.
256
00:11:56,591 --> 00:11:58,160
I know it's stupid. I'm sorry.
257
00:11:59,094 --> 00:12:02,164
Well, I mean,
why don't you want to try?
258
00:12:02,798 --> 00:12:04,433
We make beautiful babies.
259
00:12:05,233 --> 00:12:07,903
Yes, we made beautiful babies,
twice.
260
00:12:09,905 --> 00:12:13,008
So that's it?
You done?
261
00:12:14,443 --> 00:12:18,981
I just don't want to go back.
You know, the seasons change.
262
00:12:22,918 --> 00:12:26,955
-Fire two!
-Ah! Why you doing this on me?
263
00:12:27,990 --> 00:12:29,891
-Fire four!
-Ah!
264
00:12:29,891 --> 00:12:32,494
Help me! Somebody! Help me!
265
00:12:32,494 --> 00:12:35,464
Send me an angel to free me
from baby Satan!
266
00:12:35,731 --> 00:12:37,499
-Yo!
-What's happening?
267
00:12:37,499 --> 00:12:41,069
Efe! My African angel!
Untie me, this boy is crazy!
268
00:12:41,603 --> 00:12:43,305
Young man, come here.
269
00:12:44,006 --> 00:12:47,409
Mr. Brown is your elder.
You must respect him
270
00:12:47,409 --> 00:12:50,479
like the rhinoceros beetle
respects the mighty lion.
271
00:12:51,279 --> 00:12:53,949
Sorry, sir.
It won't happen again.
272
00:12:53,949 --> 00:12:56,952
Uh-huh.
You see, Brown, I told you.
273
00:12:56,952 --> 00:12:58,520
You have to show
the child who's boss.
274
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:00,756
[Brown] That boy don't know
nobody no boss.
275
00:13:00,756 --> 00:13:02,357
There's something wrong
with that boy!
276
00:13:02,357 --> 00:13:03,458
He's got them spirits!
277
00:13:03,825 --> 00:13:05,894
-That boy, something wrong.
-Hold on.
278
00:13:06,928 --> 00:13:08,563
[Efe gets shocked]
279
00:13:11,733 --> 00:13:14,503
The mighty lion needs
to go lie down.
280
00:13:17,105 --> 00:13:19,207
You almost gave Efe
a heart attack.
281
00:13:19,207 --> 00:13:20,809
What's wrong with you, boy?
282
00:13:21,943 --> 00:13:23,211
[Vinny] What's going on in here?
283
00:13:23,211 --> 00:13:24,746
Vinny, see if you can
make this boy behave.
284
00:13:24,746 --> 00:13:26,715
No problem.
Vinny got away with the...
285
00:13:27,049 --> 00:13:28,417
That's gonna be
my next invention, man.
286
00:13:28,417 --> 00:13:30,285
Stretch pants with
a nice thick belt.
287
00:13:30,285 --> 00:13:31,787
'Cause I ain't nothing
to play with now.
288
00:13:31,787 --> 00:13:34,790
-You touch me, I'm calling 911.
-Try me if you want to, boy.
289
00:13:34,790 --> 00:13:36,291
You know snitches get stitches.
I won't--
290
00:13:36,291 --> 00:13:38,527
You can't commit no violence
against kids.
291
00:13:38,527 --> 00:13:39,795
That's illegal.
292
00:13:39,795 --> 00:13:41,163
You don't want none of this
smoke, boy.
293
00:13:41,163 --> 00:13:44,199
I'm Vinny from the hood.
I ain't the one to play with.
294
00:13:44,199 --> 00:13:45,467
What is wrong with you?
295
00:13:45,467 --> 00:13:47,335
[Jeremy] What's going on here,
Mr. Brown?
296
00:13:47,335 --> 00:13:50,405
I gave this boy some ice cream
for lunch and he just went wild.
297
00:13:50,405 --> 00:13:52,074
You did not give him ice cream
for lunch.
298
00:13:52,074 --> 00:13:53,675
Why would you do that?
299
00:13:53,675 --> 00:13:55,977
Well, 'cause he said if I didn't
give him no ice cream for lunch,
300
00:13:55,977 --> 00:13:57,813
he was gonna tell
Miss Kimberly I was being mean.
301
00:13:57,813 --> 00:13:59,414
She'll break up with me,
302
00:13:59,414 --> 00:14:01,750
I can't ask her for marriage,
and we can't have our 2.5 kids.
303
00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:03,852
We're gonna have
two regular kids,
304
00:14:03,852 --> 00:14:04,986
and we're gonna have
a little person.
305
00:14:05,520 --> 00:14:08,290
Look, look, Mr. Brown, I know
you're trying to give him
306
00:14:08,290 --> 00:14:10,058
everything he wants
so that he'll like you.
307
00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:12,861
But that always backfires.
Kids like structure.
308
00:14:13,161 --> 00:14:14,629
That shows them
that you care about them.
309
00:14:14,996 --> 00:14:17,099
-I do care about him.
-Well, then show him.
310
00:14:18,967 --> 00:14:22,971
Theodore! Get over here now.
Come over here.
311
00:14:23,805 --> 00:14:26,174
-I gotta get my deep voice?
-Yes.
312
00:14:26,808 --> 00:14:29,978
Theodore!
Get over here now! Now!
313
00:14:29,978 --> 00:14:32,047
See? I got it. Now!
314
00:14:33,381 --> 00:14:35,484
Now why is it when your
grandmother was here
315
00:14:35,484 --> 00:14:36,651
you was acting nice,
316
00:14:36,651 --> 00:14:38,220
then when she leave you gonna
get all mean?
317
00:14:38,820 --> 00:14:39,921
I don't know.
318
00:14:42,157 --> 00:14:44,359
Sit down. I think...
319
00:14:46,795 --> 00:14:48,363
I know what it is.
320
00:14:48,663 --> 00:14:50,565
You think if you wasn't perfect,
321
00:14:50,565 --> 00:14:53,301
she might send you off like you
think your mother did.
322
00:14:53,735 --> 00:14:55,270
I don't know. Maybe.
323
00:14:55,871 --> 00:14:57,973
Well, I want you
to get that out your mind.
324
00:14:58,507 --> 00:15:00,475
Now your mama just going through
something right now
325
00:15:00,475 --> 00:15:03,612
and Miss Kimberly would never,
never get rid of you.
326
00:15:03,612 --> 00:15:04,913
She love you.
327
00:15:04,913 --> 00:15:06,715
-You understand?
-Yes, sir.
328
00:15:06,715 --> 00:15:08,183
Yes.
329
00:15:08,183 --> 00:15:10,085
You ain't got to try to be
mean to run me off,
330
00:15:10,085 --> 00:15:11,386
'cause I ain't going nowhere.
331
00:15:11,753 --> 00:15:13,088
-Okay.
-You sure?
332
00:15:13,088 --> 00:15:14,523
-Yeah.
-We cool?
333
00:15:14,523 --> 00:15:15,824
-Okay.
-All right.
334
00:15:15,824 --> 00:15:17,192
Now let's start over.
335
00:15:17,192 --> 00:15:18,593
What you gonna need,
336
00:15:18,593 --> 00:15:20,262
we gonna start with you
a nice nutritious meal.
337
00:15:20,795 --> 00:15:26,101
We gonna get you some pork ribs
with some fried okra.
338
00:15:26,501 --> 00:15:28,637
-[Jeremy clears throat]
-Okay.
339
00:15:29,304 --> 00:15:31,640
We'll just get you some
organic chicken nuggets
340
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:32,674
with some apple sauce.
341
00:15:33,175 --> 00:15:35,944
Black kids don't eat
apple sauce with no nuggets.
342
00:15:36,645 --> 00:15:38,180
OK, we'll do that.
343
00:15:38,180 --> 00:15:39,714
After that, we can go outside
and play catch.
344
00:15:39,714 --> 00:15:42,083
Do you think Philip mind if
we borrowed his basketball?
345
00:15:42,417 --> 00:15:43,518
He won't notice.
346
00:15:43,518 --> 00:15:45,854
He too busy out there
being a teenager,
347
00:15:45,854 --> 00:15:47,122
hanging out with his
friends and stuff.
348
00:15:47,122 --> 00:15:49,724
He don't have no time
to hang out with dad
349
00:15:49,724 --> 00:15:50,926
and play catch anymore, I guess.
350
00:15:51,326 --> 00:15:54,029
You sound salty like you need
a kid or something.
351
00:15:54,029 --> 00:15:56,398
-You can play with us, too.
-Really?
352
00:15:57,199 --> 00:15:59,568
I mean, yeah,
that sounds like fun.
353
00:16:00,635 --> 00:16:03,872
Yeah, after that, I can show you
how to break somebody's ankles
354
00:16:03,872 --> 00:16:05,273
without even
putting a hand on them.
355
00:16:05,273 --> 00:16:07,342
You want to see me break
Mr. Jeremy's ankle?
356
00:16:07,342 --> 00:16:08,243
Yeah.
357
00:16:08,243 --> 00:16:09,678
And after that never happens,
358
00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:11,580
then we can build a spaceship
with Philip's old blocks.
359
00:16:11,580 --> 00:16:14,916
Yeah. Come on.
Let's go on out there. Come on.
360
00:16:14,916 --> 00:16:16,284
Fire four!
361
00:16:17,085 --> 00:16:18,753
I thought you was gonna be nice!
Come on.
362
00:16:21,356 --> 00:16:22,791
What you doing up here?
363
00:16:23,491 --> 00:16:26,228
Packing up
Sandra's childhood things.
364
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,098
Why are you doing that?
365
00:16:30,098 --> 00:16:31,967
You know she's gotta come home
from college
366
00:16:31,967 --> 00:16:33,235
and she gonna be mad.
367
00:16:33,902 --> 00:16:35,904
-This is her room.
-Not anymore.
368
00:16:36,137 --> 00:16:37,339
She'll get over it.
369
00:16:38,306 --> 00:16:42,644
You know, my little Sandra's
all grown up and in college,
370
00:16:42,644 --> 00:16:46,414
so I realized that it's time
I accepted reality
371
00:16:46,414 --> 00:16:48,817
for what it is and move on.
372
00:16:49,251 --> 00:16:53,054
Seasons change.
You said that, remember?
373
00:16:54,222 --> 00:16:57,792
Well, about that.
374
00:17:03,198 --> 00:17:06,201
I got you
a little something something.
375
00:17:06,935 --> 00:17:10,238
-What's this?
-Go on. Open it up.
376
00:17:16,311 --> 00:17:19,714
-It's the one I wanted.
-Mm-hmm.
377
00:17:20,015 --> 00:17:22,984
I love it,
but I don't understand.
378
00:17:23,418 --> 00:17:26,321
You said I didn't need
any more water bottles.
379
00:17:29,124 --> 00:17:30,992
You don't need
any more water bottles,
380
00:17:31,293 --> 00:17:32,661
but you wanted one.
381
00:17:33,728 --> 00:17:38,099
And as your husband, it's my
duty to give you what you want.
382
00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:46,775
Wait, are you, um, saying what
I think you're saying?
383
00:17:48,043 --> 00:17:51,346
Look, when you started talking
about having a baby,
384
00:17:51,346 --> 00:17:54,582
I just thought about all the
bad things that come with that.
385
00:17:54,582 --> 00:17:57,786
You know, the poopy diapers
and the late-night changes,
386
00:17:57,786 --> 00:18:00,822
all that stuff, man.
It's just annoying.
387
00:18:00,822 --> 00:18:02,157
Those things used to bother me.
388
00:18:02,157 --> 00:18:04,259
Them leaving the room,
not turning the light off.
389
00:18:04,259 --> 00:18:07,028
-Ooh, right, when they do that.
-Yeah.
390
00:18:07,729 --> 00:18:13,134
But after helping Mr. Brown
babysit Kimberly's grandson...
391
00:18:13,134 --> 00:18:15,503
-Mm, so cute.
-Yeah, he is.
392
00:18:16,538 --> 00:18:18,473
I just started realizing
how fun it is
393
00:18:18,473 --> 00:18:19,974
to have a little kid around.
394
00:18:20,809 --> 00:18:23,144
And it made me change
the way I was thinking.
395
00:18:23,712 --> 00:18:24,979
Mm, and let me guess,
396
00:18:25,714 --> 00:18:28,316
build spaceships with those
building blocks
397
00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:30,418
that you always hide from me
398
00:18:30,418 --> 00:18:32,654
every time I tell
you to throw them out?
399
00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:34,456
Maybe, yeah.
400
00:18:35,523 --> 00:18:36,791
Yes, Jeremy.
401
00:18:38,326 --> 00:18:41,830
Look, for all the aggravating
things about children,
402
00:18:42,497 --> 00:18:44,499
they are definitely a blessing.
403
00:18:45,133 --> 00:18:46,801
-Amen.
-Yeah.
404
00:18:47,135 --> 00:18:48,703
So, um...
405
00:18:49,304 --> 00:18:51,373
you ready to try again,
Big Daddy?
406
00:18:53,241 --> 00:18:55,276
You know I like when you call me
Big Daddy.
407
00:18:55,276 --> 00:18:57,445
-Yeah, Big Daddy.
-Of course.
408
00:18:57,445 --> 00:19:00,048
Yes, I am ready to try again.
And again.
409
00:19:00,281 --> 00:19:02,484
-Mm.
-And again.
410
00:19:05,220 --> 00:19:06,554
Not in here.
411
00:19:07,222 --> 00:19:08,890
A little weird.
Just a little bit.
412
00:19:08,890 --> 00:19:10,091
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
413
00:19:10,592 --> 00:19:13,061
Definitely can't fit
a million kids in here.
414
00:19:13,528 --> 00:19:16,498
Oh, now you got a million
in you? OK!
415
00:19:16,931 --> 00:19:19,167
Hey, bring the horsey.
416
00:19:19,434 --> 00:19:22,837
What you gonna do, boy?
417
00:19:26,433 --> 00:19:28,368
[Brown] Look there. Look there.
418
00:19:28,368 --> 00:19:30,170
Put the black one over here.
Right.
419
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:32,272
Put it right on top of that one.
[phone beeps]
420
00:19:32,272 --> 00:19:34,741
Hold on. Oh! Looks like...
421
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:37,043
There you go.
Put it right there.
422
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:39,112
You ain't not much
of a builder.
423
00:19:39,112 --> 00:19:40,714
You won't be no engineer
when you grow up.
424
00:19:41,581 --> 00:19:43,083
Looks like your granny's
on her way back.
425
00:19:43,083 --> 00:19:44,351
Ooh, can I have a candy bar?
426
00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:45,986
Yeah, sure you can have
a candy bar--
427
00:19:45,986 --> 00:19:46,853
No.
428
00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:50,257
If you have a candy bar, it's
gonna make your stomach hurt.
429
00:19:50,257 --> 00:19:51,625
You already had ice cream.
430
00:19:52,459 --> 00:19:54,227
You'll blow the back out
your drawers.
431
00:19:54,227 --> 00:19:55,662
You don't wanna do that.
432
00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:57,063
-Okay?
-Okay.
433
00:19:57,063 --> 00:19:59,099
Then you eat all that candy,
get a whole bunch of cavities,
434
00:19:59,099 --> 00:20:00,667
and then your teeth
come all out,
435
00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:02,936
and you'll be walking around
looking like that.
436
00:20:04,271 --> 00:20:05,538
-You wanna be looking like that?
-No.
437
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:07,107
Well, then let's eat some
fruit, OK?
438
00:20:07,107 --> 00:20:08,275
-OK.
-All right.
439
00:20:08,275 --> 00:20:09,476
[Doorbell rings]
We'll get you some fruit.
440
00:20:09,476 --> 00:20:11,077
Sorry I took so long.
441
00:20:11,811 --> 00:20:13,980
-Did you have fun, Theodore?
-Yes, he did.
442
00:20:13,980 --> 00:20:15,515
Oh.
443
00:20:16,983 --> 00:20:19,185
-Aw!
-I had a blast.
444
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:22,088
Do we have to go now,
or can we stay a little longer?
445
00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:23,723
That's up to Mr. Brown.
446
00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:26,593
Well, no, Theodore can't go
nowhere, we gotta get his fruit,
447
00:20:26,593 --> 00:20:28,895
and we gotta finish building our
little tower, our spaceship.
448
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,131
See, girl?
449
00:20:31,131 --> 00:20:32,666
We gotta repair it
so it can blast off
450
00:20:32,666 --> 00:20:34,501
and go into the sky
and get me a moon rock,
451
00:20:34,501 --> 00:20:36,536
and then it can come back
and I can eat the cheese.
452
00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:38,405
Yes, and then we can escape
453
00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:40,974
from the planet
of the lunatic cowboys.
454
00:20:41,508 --> 00:20:44,577
-Lunatic cowboys?
-Yes. It's a long story.
455
00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:47,480
We'll tell you someday
about the lunatic cowboys.
456
00:20:48,281 --> 00:20:50,317
Yes, this boy may be
a good Boy Scout,
457
00:20:50,317 --> 00:20:52,919
because he ties stuff up good,
especially hogs.
458
00:20:55,706 --> 00:20:58,876
[music]
459
00:21:25,136 --> 00:21:26,704
[music]
460
00:21:27,238 --> 00:21:29,006
[music]
32866
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