All language subtitles for The Avengers - S05E13 - A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Station (15 April 1967)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:03:49,382 --> 00:03:50,736 We're needed. 2 00:03:59,643 --> 00:04:01,103 Well? 3 00:04:02,620 --> 00:04:06,539 To drag a girl away from her fireside, it must be important. 4 00:04:06,731 --> 00:04:08,876 I agree. And a fellow from his electric blanket. 5 00:04:09,619 --> 00:04:11,745 And you have no idea why he wanted you to meet his train? 6 00:04:11,895 --> 00:04:15,080 No, but dear fat, pompous Lucas isn't given to exaggerating. 7 00:04:15,260 --> 00:04:16,643 Good for Lucas. 8 00:04:28,345 --> 00:04:29,531 Norborough next stop. 9 00:04:31,553 --> 00:04:33,125 Next stop Norborough. 10 00:04:58,831 --> 00:05:01,251 I do beg your pardon. I'm so sorry. 11 00:07:49,019 --> 00:07:50,502 Well, he's missed it. 12 00:07:50,695 --> 00:07:54,070 Lucas, he might have dropped off - asleep. 13 00:08:02,538 --> 00:08:04,816 I'll take this end. - Uh, what does he look like? 14 00:08:05,604 --> 00:08:08,598 Rather corpulent, not much hair, moustache. 15 00:08:34,870 --> 00:08:37,670 Hey! It's me you're supposed to be paying the attention to. 16 00:08:39,011 --> 00:08:42,671 Let's not get overenthusiastic. My husband's a very jealous man. 17 00:09:29,378 --> 00:09:32,036 Can I help you, madam? - No thank you, I'm waiting for someone. 18 00:09:56,951 --> 00:09:59,992 I can't understand it. He said he'd be here ten minutes ago. 19 00:10:00,187 --> 00:10:04,023 Perhaps you've seen him. He's bald, fat with a little moustache. 20 00:10:04,475 --> 00:10:06,620 No, madam. I've seen no one like that at all. 21 00:10:06,882 --> 00:10:09,652 What's the trouble? - This lady's lost her friend. 22 00:10:09,972 --> 00:10:11,135 On the train? 23 00:10:12,095 --> 00:10:14,969 Can't have got very far. What does your friend look like? 24 00:10:15,343 --> 00:10:18,352 Bald, fat with a little moustache. 25 00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:20,355 Oh, he said he was in some kind of trouble. 26 00:10:20,832 --> 00:10:22,978 Did he say what the trouble was? 27 00:10:23,327 --> 00:10:26,537 Well, he just said he was broke, so I lent him 5 pounds. 28 00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:31,053 I know. He probably slipped off the train at Norborough. 29 00:10:31,242 --> 00:10:33,396 That's it. He must have given you the slip at Norborough. 30 00:10:49,538 --> 00:10:51,921 I found this. - At least it proves he is on the train. 31 00:10:52,102 --> 00:10:53,709 Was. He's in trouble. 32 00:10:55,013 --> 00:10:56,264 Standard procedure. 33 00:10:56,454 --> 00:11:00,591 When an agent's on the run or in trouble, he leaves something behind, something identifiable. 34 00:11:00,784 --> 00:11:02,060 Where did Lucas run to? 35 00:11:02,237 --> 00:11:05,246 We know he didn't get off at Norborough and the train doesn't stop anywhere else. 36 00:11:05,601 --> 00:11:07,466 I don't know. - King's Cross. 37 00:11:07,870 --> 00:11:09,997 Maybe we'll find the answer in here. 38 00:11:10,364 --> 00:11:12,476 King's Cross. King's Cross. 39 00:11:14,813 --> 00:11:17,564 Excuse me, madam. A gentleman asked me to give you your 5 pound note. 40 00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:20,135 He said to apologise for the inconvenience he caused you. 41 00:11:22,261 --> 00:11:25,337 I must try that more often. - What was all that about? 42 00:11:32,577 --> 00:11:35,215 That briefcase. It belonged to Lucas. We need it. 43 00:11:45,758 --> 00:11:50,182 Four, seven, six, seven. And who's his lady friend? 44 00:11:50,701 --> 00:11:52,566 Auntie Maud. - Do you know her? 45 00:11:52,727 --> 00:11:55,915 Maud. M-A-U-D. Microfilm and Uncyphered Documents. 46 00:11:56,283 --> 00:11:57,549 Army issue pouch. 47 00:11:57,710 --> 00:12:00,653 Ah, agents - for the use of. What else? 48 00:12:01,038 --> 00:12:07,549 4767? Fourth of July, 1967. Independence Day. 49 00:12:07,929 --> 00:12:11,557 Could be. Now these are Lucas's notes. It's going to take me some time to decipher these. 50 00:12:11,923 --> 00:12:16,513 Steed, this man, Salt - personal secretary to Admiral Cartney. 51 00:12:16,740 --> 00:12:18,436 Hmm. - He was on the train. 52 00:12:19,010 --> 00:12:21,578 Admiral Cartney? He certainly wasn't. 53 00:12:21,723 --> 00:12:22,929 Salt was. I saw him. 54 00:12:23,321 --> 00:12:28,030 Oh, good. Ah, he's working for Admiral Cartney. Worth a visit. 55 00:12:28,190 --> 00:12:30,141 Hasn't he just been posted to the Admiralty? 56 00:12:30,778 --> 00:12:32,562 That's hush, hush. 57 00:12:32,985 --> 00:12:34,709 - Shh. - Shh. 58 00:12:45,025 --> 00:12:47,125 Well, thank you, Admiral, for your personal tour. 59 00:12:47,444 --> 00:12:50,713 Public relations. You write a nice piece for us, helps recruiting. 60 00:12:51,047 --> 00:12:53,222 We get a better choice of man. Good job all round, hm? 61 00:12:53,513 --> 00:12:54,524 True. 62 00:12:55,165 --> 00:13:00,046 After all, your women readers want the same thing as the Admiralty, hm? 63 00:13:00,482 --> 00:13:03,928 They do? - More able-bodied men. 64 00:13:08,805 --> 00:13:12,032 Uh, more questions. - Fire away. 65 00:13:12,420 --> 00:13:15,061 "How do you like your new job?" 66 00:13:15,377 --> 00:13:19,332 I wish you hadn't asked that. It makes me sound like some sort of travel agent. 67 00:13:19,485 --> 00:13:22,890 Me, who fought five major sea battles in the last war. 68 00:13:23,207 --> 00:13:28,170 Still, to put it another way, it is important work. 69 00:13:28,329 --> 00:13:30,339 What exactly do you do? 70 00:13:30,514 --> 00:13:36,096 I make all the travel arrangements for... VIPs. 71 00:13:36,366 --> 00:13:38,234 I see. 72 00:13:38,383 --> 00:13:41,362 So if someone important is travelling from A to B, 73 00:13:41,506 --> 00:13:42,592 you make sure they're comfortable. 74 00:13:42,748 --> 00:13:46,428 Oh, I do more than that. I make sure they're secure. 75 00:13:46,601 --> 00:13:48,798 Can't have people popping off half the government. No. 76 00:13:49,490 --> 00:13:52,268 I have to make sure that all is well and shipshape, 77 00:13:52,442 --> 00:13:54,121 check every security arrangement... 78 00:13:55,587 --> 00:14:00,883 Oh, Salt, would you pop that file back to Top-Secret Registry? 79 00:14:47,041 --> 00:14:48,022 Steed... whoops! 80 00:14:48,446 --> 00:14:50,860 You really must have a word with that cleaning lady of yours. 81 00:14:51,305 --> 00:14:54,265 He tried to kill me. - Antisocial. 82 00:14:54,971 --> 00:14:56,242 According to my deciphering, 83 00:14:56,408 --> 00:14:59,590 Lucas believed he was onto a plot to kill a VIP. 84 00:14:59,762 --> 00:15:01,668 Killjoy? - What? 85 00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:02,872 You just ruined a honeymoon. 86 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:06,243 This man was on the train accompanied by a blushing bride. 87 00:15:06,515 --> 00:15:10,904 Oh, so that's why he was carrying a ticket - Chase Halt Station. 88 00:15:10,995 --> 00:15:11,862 Where's that? 89 00:15:12,476 --> 00:15:15,678 That's about three stops down the line from Norborough. 90 00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:18,540 But nothing stops there. 91 00:15:19,037 --> 00:15:21,005 Chase Halt hasn't been used for years. 92 00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:29,108 Flatterer. Did Lucas say who was going to do the popping off? 93 00:15:29,558 --> 00:15:32,330 Some splinter group, fanatics. 94 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:35,935 He intercepted some radio messages, but couldn't get a fix. 95 00:15:36,085 --> 00:15:40,081 Every time he beamed in on their transmission, they moved away. 96 00:15:40,261 --> 00:15:43,394 Oh, perhaps Lucas will fill in the gaps when we find him. 97 00:15:48,190 --> 00:15:49,910 Lucas. 98 00:15:57,421 --> 00:15:59,617 Trespassing! 99 00:15:59,800 --> 00:16:01,940 Trespassing! Yes! 100 00:16:02,666 --> 00:16:05,153 Do you know that this is my station? 101 00:16:05,467 --> 00:16:06,718 Your station? 102 00:16:07,038 --> 00:16:10,595 I bought it. I.. well, I'm... I'm negotiating to buy it. 103 00:16:12,158 --> 00:16:13,909 Humble beginnings, but one day... 104 00:16:14,215 --> 00:16:20,909 One day a... a mainline station. King's Cross, Waterloo - a terminus! 105 00:16:21,234 --> 00:16:23,362 Yes, that's what I've set my heart on. 106 00:16:23,502 --> 00:16:24,824 Are you always here? 107 00:16:25,218 --> 00:16:28,176 I live in the signal box. 108 00:16:28,376 --> 00:16:29,654 Do the trains ever stop here? 109 00:16:30,023 --> 00:16:33,110 Alas no, not for the past nine years. - Were you here last night? 110 00:16:33,332 --> 00:16:36,560 Last night? Don't talk to me about last night. It was a nightmare! 111 00:16:36,854 --> 00:16:41,200 Listen, young man. I had a phone call from a dealer with an 1892 water cistern. 112 00:16:41,552 --> 00:16:45,196 Jubilee celebration issue. Mint condition! 113 00:16:45,477 --> 00:16:48,859 When I got there, it was a practical joke. 114 00:16:49,226 --> 00:16:53,161 Final insult, I missed the last train, and had to take a bus. 115 00:16:53,367 --> 00:16:54,734 A bus! 116 00:16:58,145 --> 00:17:00,383 I found these in the ladies' waiting room. 117 00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:01,748 Really? - Yes. 118 00:17:02,074 --> 00:17:05,717 I suppose it was the practical joker. - Yes, I suppose it was. 119 00:17:05,912 --> 00:17:07,753 Is this station identical to Norborough? 120 00:17:07,912 --> 00:17:10,738 Yes, in almost every detail. Sir Scott Simon designed it. 121 00:17:10,887 --> 00:17:12,875 There must be a couple of dozen of them up and down the country. 122 00:17:13,070 --> 00:17:15,740 Very interesting. 4767, does that mean anything to you? 123 00:17:16,318 --> 00:17:18,715 Sorry, I-I-I can't help you there, no. 124 00:17:20,828 --> 00:17:23,061 Two Norboroughs for the price of one. 125 00:17:23,399 --> 00:17:27,073 Exit poor Lucas. Maybe this was their headquarters. 126 00:17:27,396 --> 00:17:29,716 Hm, or they moved from one derelict station to another. 127 00:17:29,955 --> 00:17:32,821 Do you think we ought to move poor old Lucas discreetly? 128 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:36,273 And feed friend Salt of the Admiralty some home-made information. 129 00:17:36,438 --> 00:17:37,890 And see where he takes it. 130 00:17:43,375 --> 00:17:45,188 Admiral Cartney RM. 131 00:17:45,633 --> 00:17:49,075 Oh, hello, Rodney. Huh? 132 00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:53,881 Oh, yes, yes, I've got your coded signal right in front of me. 133 00:17:55,745 --> 00:17:58,915 Periscope pictures? Oh, yes, yes, I like that very much, hm. 134 00:17:59,969 --> 00:18:02,830 Oh, do you think the Pyrocanthus is fitted for the job? 135 00:18:04,032 --> 00:18:08,005 Oh, I see. Yes, splendid. Uh, Rodney... 136 00:18:09,532 --> 00:18:11,084 Okay, I was just clearing it with you. 137 00:18:11,512 --> 00:18:12,729 What? 138 00:18:14,008 --> 00:18:16,800 Oh, yes, yes, of course, I'll burn it at once. 139 00:18:17,081 --> 00:18:20,955 Yes, can't have that falling into other people's hands; might be very embarrassing. 140 00:18:21,466 --> 00:18:22,846 Yes. Right. Goodbye. 141 00:18:24,098 --> 00:18:27,156 Action at last! Did you hear that, Salt? 142 00:18:27,443 --> 00:18:30,821 Action, sir? - Yes, top-security manoeuvres. 143 00:18:31,093 --> 00:18:32,984 The whole of the general staff 144 00:18:33,141 --> 00:18:37,277 are going to tour the enemy's off-shore installation. 145 00:18:47,253 --> 00:18:50,706 Sorry to disturb you. Which platform for the 08:10 to Liverpool? 146 00:18:50,859 --> 00:18:52,547 Number seven. - Thank you. 147 00:18:54,978 --> 00:18:56,938 Excuse me? - Yes, sir. 148 00:18:57,122 --> 00:18:58,673 Where's the nearest telephone? 149 00:18:59,024 --> 00:19:01,791 Over there, under the clock. 150 00:19:02,435 --> 00:19:05,057 Under the clock. Thank you. 151 00:19:07,701 --> 00:19:09,610 'Mrs. Peel?' - Yes, Steed? 152 00:19:09,976 --> 00:19:12,680 'I think he's taken the hook.' - Good. 153 00:19:12,921 --> 00:19:15,550 'I'm at the station now. He's just boarded the train.' 154 00:19:16,408 --> 00:19:17,439 'I'm following him.' 155 00:19:17,744 --> 00:19:19,532 Does it stop at Norborough? 156 00:19:19,722 --> 00:19:20,714 'That's the one.' 157 00:19:20,996 --> 00:19:23,306 I'll meet you there. - 'Right.' 158 00:19:29,305 --> 00:19:30,428 Tickets, please. 159 00:19:34,044 --> 00:19:35,610 Tickets, please, gentlemen. 160 00:19:36,289 --> 00:19:38,384 When one wants it, one can never find it. 161 00:19:40,215 --> 00:19:41,985 Oh. Excuse me, sir. 162 00:19:42,130 --> 00:19:44,369 20 years on the railways and it still plays me up. 163 00:19:44,556 --> 00:19:46,574 Oh, I'm sorry to hear it. - Thank you, sir. 164 00:19:48,447 --> 00:19:49,631 Thank you. 165 00:19:50,156 --> 00:19:52,320 Here you go. - Thank you. 166 00:19:56,930 --> 00:19:58,294 Thank you, sir. 167 00:19:58,434 --> 00:19:59,969 Norborough next stop, gentlemen. 168 00:20:00,512 --> 00:20:04,274 First call for dinner. Thank you, sir. 169 00:20:04,588 --> 00:20:08,219 Do you travel this line often? - Quite often. 170 00:20:08,623 --> 00:20:10,031 First call for dinner. 171 00:20:20,876 --> 00:20:24,214 Second call for dinner. Second call for dinner, please. 172 00:20:24,872 --> 00:20:26,169 Second call for dinner. 173 00:20:27,365 --> 00:20:28,741 Second call for dinner. 174 00:20:30,598 --> 00:20:31,999 Second call for dinner. 175 00:20:33,710 --> 00:20:35,870 Oh, which way is the restaurant car, please? 176 00:20:36,013 --> 00:20:37,917 It seems about five miles that way. - Thank you. 177 00:20:47,878 --> 00:20:49,728 That man... - What man? 178 00:20:49,919 --> 00:20:52,356 The one who just went past. It's the same one. 179 00:20:52,516 --> 00:20:53,298 The same what? 180 00:20:53,639 --> 00:20:56,487 The same man who found Lucas's briefcase, the one Bart went after. 181 00:20:57,627 --> 00:21:00,155 Are you sure? - Positive. 182 00:21:00,902 --> 00:21:02,935 Bart didn't report back, did he? 183 00:21:20,459 --> 00:21:21,914 I haven't let Salt out of my sight. 184 00:21:23,364 --> 00:21:27,042 So far no one's tried to contact him, and he hasn't tried to contact anybody. 185 00:21:33,663 --> 00:21:37,842 I-I-I say, do you mind if we change seats? I-I-I must sit with my back to the engine. 186 00:21:38,194 --> 00:21:39,684 Not at all. 187 00:22:12,909 --> 00:22:13,921 I was just coming to look for you. 188 00:22:14,401 --> 00:22:16,273 The man in Salt's compartment, I think he's dangerous. 189 00:22:17,059 --> 00:22:19,718 In that case you'd better tell Salt. Do something about it. 190 00:22:40,735 --> 00:22:42,434 I think it best you... you don't move. 191 00:23:01,250 --> 00:23:03,027 All taken care of, dearly beloved. 192 00:23:04,707 --> 00:23:06,447 All taken care of. 193 00:23:09,170 --> 00:23:11,315 Ah, Norborough. 194 00:24:10,747 --> 00:24:16,633 'The train now arriving at platform 4 is the...' 195 00:24:52,006 --> 00:24:53,745 Salt's just leaving. - Good. 196 00:24:53,919 --> 00:24:58,145 Bad. His latest information was false from beginning to end. 197 00:24:58,594 --> 00:25:01,433 Not a word of truth in it. - Oh, dear. 198 00:25:02,089 --> 00:25:05,065 He'll be going back to his office sometime tonight. 199 00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:11,766 Steed? 200 00:25:13,730 --> 00:25:15,283 Steed? 201 00:25:26,748 --> 00:25:28,264 'I haven't let Salt out of my sight.' 202 00:25:30,316 --> 00:25:32,173 'I haven't let Salt out of my sight.' 203 00:25:32,944 --> 00:25:36,736 'No one's tried to contact him yet and he hasn't contacted anybody else.' 204 00:25:44,048 --> 00:25:45,667 'I think it best you don't move.' 205 00:25:52,593 --> 00:25:55,017 Admiral Cartney? Mrs Peel. 206 00:25:55,846 --> 00:25:58,789 Yes, I know it's long after eight bells. 207 00:25:59,232 --> 00:26:01,976 There's something you ought to know about Salt. 208 00:26:31,378 --> 00:26:33,163 The signal you gave us was a fake. 209 00:26:33,647 --> 00:26:37,001 HMS Pyrocanthus is in mothballs. Has been for years. 210 00:26:37,281 --> 00:26:41,070 So the general staff won't be visiting enemy installations, will they? 211 00:26:41,390 --> 00:26:43,466 I got it from the Admiral. Now, look, you've got to believe me. 212 00:26:43,706 --> 00:26:45,515 You may be telling the truth. You may be right. 213 00:26:45,870 --> 00:26:50,233 Well, in that case surely you... - In that case you're under suspicion. 214 00:26:50,570 --> 00:26:53,391 Sorry. Too close to the big day. 215 00:27:10,187 --> 00:27:12,845 Mrs. Peel, you still haven't explained to me why... 216 00:27:13,250 --> 00:27:15,328 If we can just search his desk... - Hold on a minute. 217 00:27:15,672 --> 00:27:17,224 A strong smell of grapeshot in the air. 218 00:27:18,953 --> 00:27:23,548 Oh, my dear girl, I do owe you an apology. There is something going on. 219 00:27:23,936 --> 00:27:26,313 There was, but someone got there before us. 220 00:27:27,498 --> 00:27:29,906 Till death us do part. 221 00:27:30,253 --> 00:27:32,792 Please don't use those words! 222 00:27:33,220 --> 00:27:35,923 I've spent my entire life trying to avoid the final splicing. 223 00:27:36,256 --> 00:27:37,703 I've ever dropped anchor long enough at any one... 224 00:27:37,875 --> 00:27:41,249 Admiral, is there any VIP about to travel at the moment? 225 00:27:41,430 --> 00:27:42,956 Always travelling. Why? 226 00:27:43,148 --> 00:27:45,824 Well, Lucas was obviously on to something, which is why he was killed. 227 00:27:46,130 --> 00:27:48,298 Ah, yes, Lucas, poor fellow. Ex-Navy, you know. 228 00:27:49,159 --> 00:27:51,625 Fancy getting it on a railway station. 229 00:27:51,944 --> 00:27:55,357 Perhaps he discovered that a VIP was about to be popped off. 230 00:27:55,641 --> 00:27:57,857 Hm? Over my dead body. 231 00:27:58,157 --> 00:27:59,645 Could be. 232 00:28:01,761 --> 00:28:03,102 Oh. 233 00:28:09,552 --> 00:28:13,412 "London to Norborough. First-class return." 234 00:28:14,195 --> 00:28:15,733 There must be about 100 of them. 235 00:28:16,068 --> 00:28:18,117 The fellow must have had an obsession about railways. 236 00:28:18,287 --> 00:28:21,827 And they're all punched through. See, the "O" in "Norborough" is punched through. 237 00:28:22,481 --> 00:28:25,478 Oh, yes, and the hole's just about the size of a... 238 00:28:25,713 --> 00:28:29,191 Self-respecting microdot. Makes sense. 239 00:28:29,486 --> 00:28:35,096 Salt fills in the "O" with a microdot. - Ticket collector punches it out again... 240 00:28:35,273 --> 00:28:37,123 And, bingo, the message is passed on. 241 00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:40,627 To a ticket collector?! 242 00:28:44,225 --> 00:28:46,509 How did the ceremony go? 243 00:28:46,964 --> 00:28:50,195 Mr. Salt, late-VIP now RIP. 244 00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:53,799 A little keepsake. A memento. 245 00:28:53,945 --> 00:28:57,003 I'll take that. Come on, I want to see how things are going. 246 00:29:07,027 --> 00:29:09,101 What a beautiful sight! 247 00:29:09,603 --> 00:29:10,977 Which? Me or the bomb? 248 00:29:11,292 --> 00:29:12,977 Oh, you, of course, my dear. 249 00:29:14,012 --> 00:29:17,306 Reassure me. How do we know the vibrations from the train won't set the bomb off? 250 00:29:17,687 --> 00:29:19,788 We'll have to take her word for it. 251 00:29:20,536 --> 00:29:21,717 I've got very good credits, 252 00:29:22,016 --> 00:29:25,007 but I must admit I don't think I've ever had to deal with anybody quite so... 253 00:29:27,466 --> 00:29:30,088 What triggers the bomb off this time? - A radio signal. 254 00:29:30,260 --> 00:29:31,759 From this train. 255 00:29:32,162 --> 00:29:33,487 It sounds dangerous. 256 00:29:33,875 --> 00:29:36,052 Not at all. 257 00:29:37,406 --> 00:29:40,073 There ought to be a mile between us at least. 258 00:29:41,188 --> 00:29:42,298 There will be. 259 00:29:42,466 --> 00:29:45,696 Yes, we don't want to be blown up as well, do we? 260 00:29:46,056 --> 00:29:47,382 We won't be! 261 00:29:47,779 --> 00:29:51,271 No, the moment that goes up, we'll be speeding away in the opposite direction. 262 00:29:51,621 --> 00:29:53,531 So just relax. 263 00:29:53,705 --> 00:29:57,381 Relax? How are we going to get this carriage off this train and on to his train? 264 00:29:57,690 --> 00:29:59,963 Easy. - There's your answer. 265 00:30:00,127 --> 00:30:03,448 "This carriage to be commandeered and prepared for VIP train." 266 00:30:03,714 --> 00:30:04,989 VIP. 267 00:30:05,268 --> 00:30:07,783 Very Important Person. - Very! 268 00:30:07,959 --> 00:30:11,462 They'll be transferring this carriage tomorrow. I'll deal with it personally. 269 00:30:12,699 --> 00:30:14,827 I'll be rather sorry to see it go. 270 00:30:16,042 --> 00:30:20,346 Never mind. You may be losing a carriage, but he'll be gaining a bomb. 271 00:30:26,041 --> 00:30:27,357 Roll on tomorrow. 272 00:31:07,496 --> 00:31:10,248 Mr. Crewe? - Yes? 273 00:31:10,483 --> 00:31:12,719 Do you live here? - Well, not exactly. 274 00:31:12,886 --> 00:31:15,846 I've got a little semi-detached signal box further along the line. Why? 275 00:31:16,178 --> 00:31:17,148 So you live alone? 276 00:31:17,816 --> 00:31:20,422 Well, yes. Why all these questions? Who are you? 277 00:31:22,449 --> 00:31:24,727 Mrs Peel! - I don't know you. 278 00:31:25,011 --> 00:31:28,215 George Warren. I'm a friend of Steed's. - Where does he buy his trilbies? 279 00:31:28,456 --> 00:31:31,830 He wears bowlers and he gets them from St. James. That's my identification. 280 00:31:32,668 --> 00:31:33,877 What are you doing here? 281 00:31:34,131 --> 00:31:38,493 Could ask you the same question. Special security watch along this railway line. 282 00:31:38,879 --> 00:31:41,013 You mean, someone important is travelling along this line? 283 00:31:41,179 --> 00:31:44,872 I said Special Security. Can't divulge details to anybody. 284 00:31:45,150 --> 00:31:48,394 And I mean anybody. Now what about you? What are you doing here? 285 00:31:48,696 --> 00:31:51,127 I came to ask Mr Crewe's advice on a railway matter. 286 00:31:51,422 --> 00:31:53,916 Why don't we retire to my signal box? Come! 287 00:31:55,704 --> 00:31:57,672 And what exactly is your problem, dear lady? 288 00:31:58,085 --> 00:32:01,503 I'd like you to listen to this umbrella. - You'd like me to listen to... 289 00:32:10,692 --> 00:32:12,740 Salt's camera had a film in it. 290 00:32:13,046 --> 00:32:14,912 A very practical place to keep a film I'd say. 291 00:32:15,315 --> 00:32:16,479 I've just had it developed. 292 00:32:16,741 --> 00:32:18,791 Details of security on this line. 293 00:32:19,110 --> 00:32:22,465 They're sending a Special Branch man to every station on the route. 294 00:32:22,737 --> 00:32:25,369 Well? - They'll go to Chase Halt. 295 00:32:25,681 --> 00:32:28,099 Then they'll find Lucas's body. - Exactly. 296 00:32:28,437 --> 00:32:31,102 Unless I get to the Special Branch man first. 297 00:32:35,384 --> 00:32:38,822 - When do we reach Chase Halt? - Coming up in about ten minutes. 298 00:32:39,116 --> 00:32:40,344 Splendid. 299 00:32:41,304 --> 00:32:44,455 An unscheduled stop is indicated. 300 00:32:49,397 --> 00:32:50,318 Well? 301 00:32:51,548 --> 00:32:54,347 Is this a trick, madam? - Not at all. Why? 302 00:32:54,603 --> 00:32:57,517 Play it again, louder. 303 00:33:01,291 --> 00:33:04,714 Now two sets of diddly dums. Impossible! 304 00:33:05,306 --> 00:33:07,265 Train can't be going fast and slow at the same time. 305 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:11,072 He's right. - 'Course I'm right! Hear it? 306 00:33:11,782 --> 00:33:14,167 There's a diddly dum in the foreground, 307 00:33:14,917 --> 00:33:18,501 And then behind it, it keeps varying. 308 00:33:18,663 --> 00:33:20,436 Diddly dum, diddly dee, diddly dum, diddly dah... 309 00:33:21,620 --> 00:33:23,196 This isn't a train at all! 310 00:33:25,684 --> 00:33:27,870 Play it again. 311 00:33:33,247 --> 00:33:35,716 Funny. A train's stopped at the station. 312 00:33:37,236 --> 00:33:38,725 Quick as you can. 313 00:33:55,368 --> 00:33:56,732 Are you sure he was dead? 314 00:33:57,725 --> 00:33:58,964 Then they found him. 315 00:33:59,428 --> 00:34:02,645 Give me the gun. I'll find them. 316 00:34:04,918 --> 00:34:06,791 Try the signal box. 317 00:34:11,377 --> 00:34:13,123 Just a minute! 318 00:34:13,569 --> 00:34:16,102 Diddly dah, diddly dum ... DU ... 319 00:34:17,508 --> 00:34:20,978 It's the Mark V tapping code! - Is that good? 320 00:34:21,144 --> 00:34:24,276 The tapping code? It's a sort of shorthand in Morse. 321 00:34:24,631 --> 00:34:26,792 It was devised so that men could communicate with each other 322 00:34:26,938 --> 00:34:28,239 in the prisoner of war camps! 323 00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:32,747 Can I help? - Some paper and a pencil. 324 00:34:37,090 --> 00:34:39,673 Now, give it to me from the top. 325 00:34:42,328 --> 00:34:44,862 Diddly dah, diddly dum. 326 00:34:45,453 --> 00:34:50,087 Twiddly dum. Twiddly, twiddly, twiddly dah. 327 00:34:51,057 --> 00:34:53,849 Blinkety blink, blinkety blink. 328 00:34:54,295 --> 00:34:59,236 Chaddley dum, chaddley dah. Boopety boop. 329 00:35:02,919 --> 00:35:05,223 Durbridge! - That's on this line. 330 00:35:06,199 --> 00:35:09,912 And from all this twiddly twiddly you've learned that someone important is travelling? 331 00:35:12,171 --> 00:35:14,178 The Prime Minister? 332 00:35:30,820 --> 00:35:32,065 Somebody's train must be late. 333 00:35:35,277 --> 00:35:37,251 You were right. 334 00:35:39,196 --> 00:35:41,743 Right about what? 335 00:35:45,635 --> 00:35:48,019 The Prime Minister. 336 00:35:49,060 --> 00:35:51,433 He'll be on this line. - When? 337 00:35:53,236 --> 00:35:55,019 Tonight. 338 00:36:06,413 --> 00:36:07,818 My word, you have been busy. 339 00:36:08,489 --> 00:36:10,146 Now you know he likes the corner seat. 340 00:36:10,606 --> 00:36:12,783 Yes, sir. We did know that, sir. 341 00:36:12,917 --> 00:36:15,347 And he must face the engine, otherwise... 342 00:36:15,696 --> 00:36:19,907 You'll find that this journey will go like clockwork, sir. 343 00:36:20,061 --> 00:36:21,720 A little faster I trust. 344 00:36:33,816 --> 00:36:37,480 Hm, a trifle hard on the springing. However, this will do splendidly. 345 00:36:38,059 --> 00:36:39,382 Thank you, sir. 346 00:36:39,776 --> 00:36:43,030 He may want to thank you personally. You'll both be on the train, of course. 347 00:36:43,381 --> 00:36:46,591 I fear not, sir. We'll be on the 8:10, our regular run. 348 00:36:48,524 --> 00:36:50,443 Oh. Oh, well, then we shall pass one another. 349 00:36:51,526 --> 00:36:55,848 So we will, at 8:57 pm. 350 00:37:01,545 --> 00:37:03,480 Now, you're quite sure you want to come along? 351 00:37:03,963 --> 00:37:08,586 Oh, if I can just lay my hands on the vandal who shot at my signal box, 352 00:37:08,761 --> 00:37:12,281 destroying all my beautiful, original, grimy glass, 353 00:37:12,467 --> 00:37:15,870 stained with the steam and smoke of past glories! 354 00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,928 I'll stay here. You find the ticket collector. 355 00:37:28,072 --> 00:37:29,570 Ticket collector. Then what? 356 00:37:29,968 --> 00:37:31,400 Well, see what he does. - See what he does. 357 00:37:31,825 --> 00:37:33,757 He punches holes in the tickets. 358 00:37:34,032 --> 00:37:35,210 Just follow him. 359 00:38:38,236 --> 00:38:41,548 It's getting close to zero hour. Keep this door locked from now on. 360 00:38:42,078 --> 00:38:44,204 Don't let anyone through unless they give our knock. 361 00:38:52,768 --> 00:38:54,763 Ah, Mr Steed. - Ah, ticket inspector. 362 00:38:55,787 --> 00:38:58,453 I had you brought here to witness the final phase. 363 00:38:58,600 --> 00:38:59,822 Very decent of you. 364 00:38:59,992 --> 00:39:03,685 It's for me, really. Verging on megalomania you might say. 365 00:39:04,038 --> 00:39:08,176 But a coup is not a coup without someone to see. 366 00:39:08,707 --> 00:39:10,389 Well, I'm afraid I shan't be able to applaud. 367 00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:12,840 The look in your eyes will be enough. 368 00:39:13,344 --> 00:39:18,210 We ... I am going to blow up your prime minister. 369 00:39:18,610 --> 00:39:19,646 Oh? 370 00:39:20,740 --> 00:39:22,395 How do you know which way I voted? 371 00:39:32,564 --> 00:39:36,886 Interesting. The Prime Minister's travelling tonight. 372 00:39:38,404 --> 00:39:40,053 On this line. 373 00:39:42,442 --> 00:39:43,835 If we're lucky, we should see him pass. 374 00:39:51,532 --> 00:39:53,468 He should pass at about... 375 00:39:53,609 --> 00:39:54,916 8:57. 376 00:39:55,584 --> 00:39:58,497 At that time we will be running through Durbridge Junction. 377 00:39:58,942 --> 00:40:02,143 Durbridge, population 2,413. 378 00:40:02,486 --> 00:40:06,564 Principal industry, the manufacture of glass eyes for teddy bears. 379 00:40:07,495 --> 00:40:09,324 Fame, non-existent. 380 00:40:09,724 --> 00:40:13,247 But after tonight there won't be anybody in the civilised world 381 00:40:13,390 --> 00:40:14,904 who hasn't heard of it. 382 00:40:15,242 --> 00:40:16,460 After tonight. 383 00:40:17,030 --> 00:40:21,410 After, I have pressed this button. 384 00:40:36,378 --> 00:40:39,708 Another five miles, Mr. Steed, and then... 385 00:40:40,153 --> 00:40:41,835 Pop goes the diesel. 386 00:40:42,882 --> 00:40:44,585 Very droll. 387 00:40:45,163 --> 00:40:48,474 Sir? Could be trouble, sir. - What do you mean? We're nearly there. 388 00:40:48,798 --> 00:40:50,368 That woman who lost the 5 pounds, sir. 389 00:40:50,683 --> 00:40:53,730 She's on the train, sir, in 4767. 390 00:40:53,909 --> 00:40:56,428 My piece de resistance, Mr. Steed. 391 00:40:56,766 --> 00:41:01,150 An ingenious device by which I can contact my agents without approaching them. 392 00:41:01,372 --> 00:41:04,023 Indeed, they do not even have to leave their seats. 393 00:41:07,233 --> 00:41:08,309 Kill the woman. 394 00:41:58,663 --> 00:42:00,005 Mrs Peel. - Mm-hm? 395 00:42:00,294 --> 00:42:01,152 Oh, my goodness! 396 00:42:04,260 --> 00:42:05,337 A slight difference of opinion. 397 00:42:06,429 --> 00:42:08,290 Bom, diddly, bom, bom, bom, bom! 398 00:42:08,625 --> 00:42:10,507 Catchy, but I don't think much of the lyrics. 399 00:42:10,786 --> 00:42:13,658 No, no. The door to the restaurant car is locked. 400 00:42:14,450 --> 00:42:17,894 There is a special knock to get in. - Ah! Bom, diddly, bom, bom... 401 00:42:18,031 --> 00:42:18,948 Bom, bom. 402 00:43:11,170 --> 00:43:12,407 Hello. 403 00:43:12,717 --> 00:43:14,797 Hello! - Turn around. 404 00:43:15,839 --> 00:43:17,609 Must have been a shotgun wedding. 405 00:43:19,358 --> 00:43:21,876 Vandal! - He's better with a machine gun. 406 00:43:22,165 --> 00:43:25,205 You mean, he's the one who... my signal box? 407 00:43:25,312 --> 00:43:26,621 You beast, you... - Get in there! 408 00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:30,451 Open the door. 409 00:43:47,692 --> 00:43:50,506 Jump. - Jump? 410 00:43:52,323 --> 00:43:53,317 Jump! 411 00:43:54,932 --> 00:43:56,078 Jump. 412 00:44:26,221 --> 00:44:27,604 Dear Mrs. Peel! 413 00:44:27,810 --> 00:44:32,362 It's terribly dangerous, you know, to lean out of a train while it's in motion. 414 00:45:14,962 --> 00:45:16,477 Round two. 415 00:46:00,512 --> 00:46:03,485 Excuse me, sir, have you the right time? 416 00:46:07,533 --> 00:46:10,083 Coming up to 8:54. 417 00:46:10,387 --> 00:46:11,726 Thank you. - Pleasure. 418 00:46:11,905 --> 00:46:13,614 Running right on time. 419 00:46:15,842 --> 00:46:16,953 Splendid. 420 00:46:46,293 --> 00:46:47,911 Ladies first. - After you. 421 00:46:50,714 --> 00:46:52,230 Goodness. 422 00:46:55,394 --> 00:46:56,848 Goodness! 423 00:47:07,761 --> 00:47:09,268 What are you hanging about for? 424 00:47:10,078 --> 00:47:11,163 Kill her, Georgie, kill her! 425 00:47:11,517 --> 00:47:12,997 There's no need to get steamed up. 426 00:47:17,607 --> 00:47:19,025 Over there, Georgie! 427 00:47:19,482 --> 00:47:20,841 Is that you, Mr Steed? 428 00:47:27,740 --> 00:47:29,437 Kill them! Before the Prime Minister's train goes by. 429 00:48:04,308 --> 00:48:05,867 Do you mind? That's my... sorry. 430 00:48:32,511 --> 00:48:33,582 The button! 431 00:48:41,452 --> 00:48:44,453 What now? - Let's stop the train! 432 00:48:44,622 --> 00:48:45,595 Why not? 433 00:48:45,898 --> 00:48:48,540 Thank you. It's something I've wanted to do all my life. 434 00:48:59,691 --> 00:49:00,884 Are you sure it's him? 435 00:49:01,064 --> 00:49:03,625 It's got to be. They said "arriving any minute". 436 00:49:03,787 --> 00:49:05,574 And someone called? - Mm. 437 00:49:05,881 --> 00:49:09,539 Said something about the nation owing us a great debt of gratitude. 438 00:49:09,676 --> 00:49:12,206 I should think so. We saved him from being blown sky-high. 439 00:49:12,356 --> 00:49:13,401 No wonder he's grateful. 440 00:49:14,066 --> 00:49:16,033 Ah! Here he comes. 441 00:49:17,491 --> 00:49:20,011 Does he really need all those motorcycles? 442 00:49:20,368 --> 00:49:21,323 Yes, of course he does. 443 00:49:22,785 --> 00:49:25,110 A very impressive procession. 444 00:49:25,966 --> 00:49:27,601 That must be him - the top hat. 445 00:49:27,924 --> 00:49:30,126 No, he's the one in the raincoat. 446 00:49:31,077 --> 00:49:35,009 Really? He doesn't look as small as he does on television. 447 00:49:35,809 --> 00:49:37,187 Really? I think he looks smaller. 448 00:49:38,106 --> 00:49:39,662 I must have a bigger set. 449 00:49:40,452 --> 00:49:43,035 Ah, well, it'll be an OBE for me. 450 00:49:43,649 --> 00:49:45,002 Sir John Steed. 451 00:49:45,328 --> 00:49:46,386 Dame Emma. 452 00:49:47,932 --> 00:49:50,943 Hm, 'course you know what this means. 453 00:49:51,281 --> 00:49:55,883 Hm, he's going to make a speech. - A long speech. 454 00:49:59,591 --> 00:50:00,663 Did you vote for him? 455 00:50:02,264 --> 00:50:03,647 Did you? 456 00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:08,214 Let's... - Pretend we're out? 457 00:50:09,876 --> 00:50:14,367 subtitles by rick@peoplesguidetothecosmos.com 36110

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