Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,836 --> 00:00:03,546
So, how did this happen?
2
00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:07,382
Your Honor, what began
as a verbal dispute
3
00:00:07,383 --> 00:00:10,176
escalated into a
full-on trash fight
4
00:00:10,177 --> 00:00:12,762
in the middle of Second Avenue.
5
00:00:12,763 --> 00:00:15,140
Your Honor, we are asking
the court for leniency,
6
00:00:15,141 --> 00:00:18,393
as we are in the third week
of a citywide garbage strike,
7
00:00:18,394 --> 00:00:21,771
and everyone is on edge.
8
00:00:21,772 --> 00:00:23,190
You don't believe me?
9
00:00:25,985 --> 00:00:27,986
Alright, case dismissed.
10
00:00:27,987 --> 00:00:30,405
Please remember, even in
our darkest moments...
11
00:00:30,406 --> 00:00:32,158
And there's a bug on your face.
12
00:00:35,077 --> 00:00:36,703
Five-minute recess.
13
00:00:36,704 --> 00:00:38,747
Wow, with all the
trash piling up,
14
00:00:38,748 --> 00:00:41,542
people are really starting
to lose their minds.
15
00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:47,797
Yeah, people.
16
00:00:47,798 --> 00:00:49,549
If you ask me, I
think everyone's
17
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,384
overreacting to this strike.
18
00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,802
I mean, garbage
is a part of life.
19
00:00:52,803 --> 00:00:54,179
We come into this
world as trash.
20
00:00:54,180 --> 00:00:56,639
We leave it as trash.
21
00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,808
Well, garbage strikes are
the one citywide crisis
22
00:00:58,809 --> 00:01:00,310
that I cannot abide.
23
00:01:00,311 --> 00:01:02,187
I'll take a blackout
over this any day.
24
00:01:02,188 --> 00:01:05,231
Oh, I love a good blackout.
25
00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:07,734
Ah, the restaurants and bars
26
00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:11,154
give you food and
drinks for free.
27
00:01:11,155 --> 00:01:14,908
And when a stranger grabs
your ass in total darkness,
28
00:01:14,909 --> 00:01:17,578
you can imagine it's anyone.
29
00:01:19,455 --> 00:01:21,247
Even Sting.
30
00:01:21,248 --> 00:01:23,166
MTA strikes aren't bad, either.
31
00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:26,127
Get your walking in and don't
have to sit in a metal tube
32
00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:28,671
watching people pretend to read.
33
00:01:28,672 --> 00:01:30,423
- You want to get some coffee?
- Oh, yeah.
34
00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:32,467
Oh, and... and how
great are blizzards?
35
00:01:32,468 --> 00:01:34,594
God, you can spend the
day staring out the window
36
00:01:34,595 --> 00:01:36,638
- watching idiots fall down.
- Yeah, you ever see a guy
37
00:01:36,639 --> 00:01:38,598
fall into his own baby carriage?
38
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:42,143
Neither one of them
knows what to do.
39
00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:45,271
Is anyone else nervous
there's two of them now?
40
00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:47,899
Still not clean.
41
00:01:47,900 --> 00:01:50,443
Wyatt, I had no idea you
were such a neat freak.
42
00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:54,405
I'd call you Mr. Clean, but
you can't pull off an earring.
43
00:01:54,406 --> 00:01:55,657
First of all, it
was the weekend,
44
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:58,201
and I was trying something.
45
00:01:58,202 --> 00:02:00,161
Second, I'm not a neat freak.
46
00:02:00,162 --> 00:02:03,873
I'm a neat... ally.
47
00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:05,375
Dirt is like vampires.
48
00:02:05,376 --> 00:02:08,127
If you invite it in,
it'll never leave.
49
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:10,088
Vampires famously leave.
50
00:02:10,089 --> 00:02:12,590
They turn into bats
and get the hell out.
51
00:02:12,591 --> 00:02:14,175
All I'm saying is, it'd be nice
52
00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:15,802
if the courthouse stayed clean,
53
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:17,428
since it's somehow the
one place in the city
54
00:02:17,429 --> 00:02:19,764
- that's not covered in garbage.
- You're right.
55
00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:21,724
What do you think they're
doing with all that trash?
56
00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:24,644
I don't care what
they're doing with it.
57
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:27,313
All I know is this is an oasis
compared to the nightmare
58
00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:30,316
that waits beyond those doors.
59
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:33,444
Whew!
60
00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:37,532
Let me tell you,
I have had a day.
61
00:02:37,533 --> 00:02:40,243
Man, trash strike got you, too?
62
00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:42,036
What trash strike?
63
00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:48,037
{\an8}♪
64
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:52,797
{\an8}Mr. Crainey was charged with
multiple counts of trespassing.
65
00:02:52,798 --> 00:02:54,757
{\an8}He was caught digging
through the trash
66
00:02:54,758 --> 00:02:56,801
{\an8}of several celebrities.
67
00:02:56,802 --> 00:02:58,846
{\an8}And Kathy Griffin.
68
00:03:00,306 --> 00:03:01,764
{\an8}Seems like a random burn.
69
00:03:01,765 --> 00:03:05,184
{\an8}Oh, she knows what she did.
70
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:07,145
{\an8}My client wasn't hurting anyone.
71
00:03:07,146 --> 00:03:08,605
{\an8}I mean, half the free
stuff celebrities get
72
00:03:08,606 --> 00:03:10,273
{\an8}goes right in the trash.
73
00:03:10,274 --> 00:03:12,275
{\an8}Believe me, if Liam Neeson
wants his Theragun back,
74
00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:15,111
{\an8}he'll come and get it.
75
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:16,821
{\an8}$100 fine.
76
00:03:16,822 --> 00:03:19,616
{\an8}And instead of mooching
off other people's success,
77
00:03:19,617 --> 00:03:23,077
{\an8}maybe work hard and earn
your own invitation to, um,
78
00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:27,415
{\an8}Paris Hilton's
dog's quinceañera.
79
00:03:27,416 --> 00:03:29,500
{\an8}You know, Dan,
I've been thinking.
80
00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:31,502
{\an8}Garbage strikes aren't all bad.
81
00:03:31,503 --> 00:03:33,087
{\an8}You know, it keeps
the tourists away,
82
00:03:33,088 --> 00:03:36,049
{\an8}so you get to have the
city all to yourself.
83
00:03:36,050 --> 00:03:38,509
{\an8}And even the rats
are so fat and horny
84
00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:41,179
{\an8}that they don't bother you.
85
00:03:41,180 --> 00:03:42,764
{\an8}Yeah, in theory, that's great.
86
00:03:42,765 --> 00:03:45,725
{\an8}You're forgetting one
thing... the stench.
87
00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:49,103
{\an8}What if I told you there
was a way around that?
88
00:03:49,104 --> 00:03:51,356
{\an8}They found this on
the dumpster diver.
89
00:03:51,357 --> 00:03:54,025
{\an8}Expired ear drops.
90
00:03:54,026 --> 00:03:58,446
{\an8}The main side effect is you
lose your sense of smell.
91
00:03:58,447 --> 00:04:02,450
{\an8}Another side effect
is day terrors.
92
00:04:02,451 --> 00:04:04,285
{\an8}- Have you tried them yet?
- Not yet.
93
00:04:04,286 --> 00:04:06,747
{\an8}Get thee back to hell, succubus!
94
00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:13,044
{\an8}I'm messing with you.
95
00:04:13,045 --> 00:04:14,587
{\an8}No, I thought we could share it
96
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:16,965
{\an8}and, you know, maybe
go explore together.
97
00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:19,592
{\an8}Why are you being nice?
98
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,386
{\an8}You should know, the doctors
have declared my organs
99
00:04:21,387 --> 00:04:24,138
{\an8}adequate at best.
100
00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:26,265
{\an8}Maybe I just want someone
to be there to help
101
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:28,476
{\an8}if I see a demon.
102
00:04:28,477 --> 00:04:30,061
{\an8}Or maybe...
103
00:04:30,062 --> 00:04:31,771
{\an8}I'm falling in love with...
104
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:34,108
{\an8}[ Laughs ]
105
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:40,071
{\an8}I can't even say that
with a straight face.
106
00:04:40,072 --> 00:04:42,657
{\an8}No, no, it's the demon thing.
107
00:04:42,658 --> 00:04:44,325
Alright, tell you what,
I'm gonna go against
108
00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:47,662
every instinct I have
and say, eh, sure.
109
00:04:47,663 --> 00:04:49,497
But listen, if you're
trying to trick me,
110
00:04:49,498 --> 00:04:51,457
I want it on record that
I never trusted you,
111
00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:53,210
so it doesn't count.
112
00:04:55,129 --> 00:04:57,714
- Ooh, there's Bert.
- She's the head custodian.
113
00:04:57,715 --> 00:05:00,675
We should ask how they're
keeping this place so clean.
114
00:05:00,676 --> 00:05:02,051
You're really not curious?
115
00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,594
No, because I already know.
116
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:05,722
She's using a
trash-eating enzyme,
117
00:05:05,723 --> 00:05:07,640
possibly cytochrome c oxidase.
118
00:05:07,641 --> 00:05:09,183
The real question's,
how'd she get access
119
00:05:09,184 --> 00:05:12,603
to a military lab in Serbia?
120
00:05:12,604 --> 00:05:15,189
- That's ridiculous.
- You want to know my theory?
121
00:05:15,190 --> 00:05:17,692
Somebody's eating it.
122
00:05:17,693 --> 00:05:19,403
But who?
123
00:05:21,030 --> 00:05:24,657
So, you want to know what
we're doing with the trash?
124
00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:27,035
- How did you know?
- Well, you're a Sagittarius,
125
00:05:27,036 --> 00:05:28,911
so you have an inquisitive mind.
126
00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:31,372
Also, sometimes people throw
out working hearing aids,
127
00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:34,083
and I use them to eavesdrop.
128
00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:37,462
But you wash them
off first, right?
129
00:05:37,463 --> 00:05:39,923
That's how you
get ear-patitis C!
130
00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:44,052
So, Bert, how about sharing
your cleaning secret with us?
131
00:05:44,053 --> 00:05:45,845
Sorry, I can't tell you.
132
00:05:45,846 --> 00:05:47,889
- That's fine.
- We don't want to bother you.
133
00:05:47,890 --> 00:05:50,349
But I can show you.
134
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:51,977
Ta-da!
135
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:57,565
You throw the trash
in a big hole?
136
00:05:57,566 --> 00:06:00,193
Technically, a hole you
can see the bottom of.
137
00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:03,279
This is an abyss.
138
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:05,323
- I have a lot of questions.
- Really?
139
00:06:05,324 --> 00:06:08,327
I thought the big hole would
have answered most of them.
140
00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:14,207
I was expecting
more "holy crap!"
141
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:17,710
and less hole of crap.
142
00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:20,838
- You don't, uh...
- You don't like the hole?
143
00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:22,924
It's not that I
don't like the hole.
144
00:06:22,925 --> 00:06:26,385
I just prefer things
to have a bottom.
145
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,596
You've got some nerve.
146
00:06:28,597 --> 00:06:30,681
Do you want your
courtroom clean or not?
147
00:06:30,682 --> 00:06:33,976
- Clean! Definitely.
- She didn't mean anything by it.
148
00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:35,353
She loves the hole.
149
00:06:35,354 --> 00:06:37,105
Abby, tell her
you love the hole.
150
00:06:37,106 --> 00:06:39,857
It's just a bit of a letdown.
151
00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:41,526
I guess I was expecting
more from you.
152
00:06:41,527 --> 00:06:43,903
You were expecting more from me?
153
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:47,698
This is the second
conversation we've ever had.
154
00:06:47,699 --> 00:06:51,077
Ohh, you trash-makers
are all the same.
155
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,704
Nothing but complaints
with no appreciation.
156
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:55,998
Well, you know what? We're
not taking it anymore.
157
00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:58,584
Giuseppe, stand down!
158
00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,838
We're on strike.
159
00:07:03,632 --> 00:07:05,716
I know there are bigger
issues right now,
160
00:07:05,717 --> 00:07:07,135
but are we just going to ignore
161
00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:09,429
that that guy's
name is Giuseppe?
162
00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:19,230
Okay, the custodians
joined the garbage strike
163
00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:21,357
after I ever so slightly
164
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:24,235
questioned their
waste-disposal methods.
165
00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:28,614
Abby, don't tell me you
spoke ill of the hole.
166
00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:29,991
You knew about the hole?
167
00:07:29,992 --> 00:07:32,243
Everybody knows about the hole.
168
00:07:32,244 --> 00:07:33,828
This is just like
when no one explained
169
00:07:33,829 --> 00:07:35,621
what brat summer was.
170
00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,331
I went around asking, "Is
this brat? Is this brat?"
171
00:07:37,332 --> 00:07:40,585
It never was.
172
00:07:40,586 --> 00:07:43,212
But it's okay, because
I designed a system
173
00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:46,465
to keep this place clean
that is both fair and fun.
174
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:47,717
- Let me guess.
- You made a wheel.
175
00:07:47,718 --> 00:07:51,012
I made a wheel!
176
00:07:51,013 --> 00:07:53,055
Wyatt, would you
like to spin first?
177
00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:56,142
Come on, "de-louse
the gallery."
178
00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:58,019
And what do we do with
the garbage we collect?
179
00:07:58,020 --> 00:08:00,813
- Flobert's got that covered.
- I have a guy.
180
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:04,275
Really? We're all fine
with that explanation?
181
00:08:04,276 --> 00:08:05,818
Flobert does have a lot of guys.
182
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:07,403
One of them shortens my robes
183
00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:09,323
and uses the extra
for headbands.
184
00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:14,702
- "Dance it out."
- Well, what's that?
185
00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:16,495
It's when you dance
it out for 30 seconds.
186
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:18,372
It's a fun one.
187
00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:20,291
I don't want a fun one.
188
00:08:20,292 --> 00:08:24,754
I want to hear the bacteria
scream as I send them to hell!
189
00:08:24,755 --> 00:08:26,673
But first, dancing.
190
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:35,473
I'm amazed how effective
those ear drops are.
191
00:08:35,474 --> 00:08:37,725
I mean, I have not
smelled a thing all day,
192
00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:40,853
and I'm starting to get a
handle on those side effects.
193
00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:43,315
Out, beast!
194
00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:49,987
You all missed a
hell of a good time.
195
00:08:49,988 --> 00:08:52,490
We went to a crowd-free
Statue of Liberty
196
00:08:52,491 --> 00:08:54,909
and dined alone at Le Bernardin.
197
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:58,204
And without tourists, Times
Square is healing itself
198
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,957
and returning to
its natural state.
199
00:09:00,958 --> 00:09:04,001
Porno theaters are back.
200
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:06,128
- What's going on here?
- You know what?
201
00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:07,546
I'm going to assume that Abby
202
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,090
somehow pissed off the hole lady
203
00:09:09,091 --> 00:09:12,051
and now she refuses to clean.
204
00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,720
But she's come up
with a fun solution
205
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:17,598
that Wyatt is now trapped in.
206
00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:19,517
30 seconds must be up by now.
207
00:09:19,518 --> 00:09:21,602
You better not be
counting in Mississippis.
208
00:09:21,603 --> 00:09:23,355
There's no other way to count.
209
00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:27,316
- Strike! Strike!
- Strike!
210
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:31,112
- Excuse me.
- Gurgs, Gurgs, we need to talk.
211
00:09:31,113 --> 00:09:33,489
My garbage guy fell through.
212
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,992
I don't understand. He's
usually so reliable.
213
00:09:35,993 --> 00:09:38,452
Every Tuesday, 8:00
a.m., he comes by
214
00:09:38,453 --> 00:09:43,249
in his big green truck that
says "Sanitation" on the side.
215
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:46,627
So your garbage guy
was just a garbageman?
216
00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:49,213
You gotta help me figure out
what to do with all the trash.
217
00:09:49,214 --> 00:09:51,632
I can't keep driving it out to
the middle of the East River
218
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:53,426
on my Sea-Doo.
219
00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:54,969
This one's ready
for you, Flobert.
220
00:09:54,970 --> 00:09:57,013
And I am ready for it.
221
00:09:57,014 --> 00:09:58,973
[ Laughs ]
222
00:09:58,974 --> 00:10:01,142
[ Whimpering ] I
ain't ready for it.
223
00:10:01,143 --> 00:10:03,894
Alright, I'll help, but
I'm not doing it for you.
224
00:10:03,895 --> 00:10:05,856
I'm doing it for the Sea-Doo.
225
00:10:08,442 --> 00:10:11,027
Wow, this place looks great.
226
00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:14,030
The floor doesn't look
like it chain smokes.
227
00:10:14,031 --> 00:10:16,866
- Way to go, mop star.
- I didn't mop anything.
228
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:18,617
I'm actually trying to figure
out what I'm gonna do tomorrow.
229
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:19,869
I can finally walk
along the Hudson
230
00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:22,496
without smelling New Jersey.
231
00:10:22,497 --> 00:10:24,040
Still have to see it, though.
232
00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:26,250
I'll just take my glasses off.
233
00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:28,502
Wait. When you spun the wheel,
you got "mop the floors."
234
00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:30,546
So if you didn't
do it, then who...
235
00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:33,175
- Wyatt.
- I knew he'd do it wrong!
236
00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:37,094
Abby, look, I consider
myself a reasonable man.
237
00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:39,013
Someone walk in behind
me, I'll hold the door.
238
00:10:39,014 --> 00:10:40,848
I see someone walk into a door,
239
00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:43,476
I'll wait to laugh
until they're gone.
240
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:46,395
But cleaning the courthouse
when it's not part of my job
241
00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:48,647
is a line I will not cross.
242
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:50,649
Oh, you hear that?
243
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,444
The fancy one won't
cross the picket line.
244
00:10:53,445 --> 00:10:55,738
He's on our side!
245
00:10:55,739 --> 00:10:57,531
Uh, yeah, that's right.
246
00:10:57,532 --> 00:11:02,036
I'm not cleaning
for noble reasons.
247
00:11:02,037 --> 00:11:03,496
You are so full of it.
248
00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:05,206
And you laughed immediately
249
00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:07,626
when I walked into that
door you didn't hold for me.
250
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:11,545
- Bert, what can I do to fix this?
- Oh, typical.
251
00:11:11,546 --> 00:11:14,465
You only care about us when
the garbage hits the fan.
252
00:11:14,466 --> 00:11:16,717
You never ask us about
our hopes, our dreams,
253
00:11:16,718 --> 00:11:18,969
our pet alligators.
254
00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:22,223
- Oh, right. Yeah.
- How is the little green fella?
255
00:11:22,224 --> 00:11:26,894
She has a name, and it's Todd.
256
00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:29,480
Guess this guy is the
only one who cares.
257
00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:31,482
- He doesn't care.
- He's just lazy.
258
00:11:31,483 --> 00:11:32,775
I'll prove it.
259
00:11:32,776 --> 00:11:35,486
What's her name?
260
00:11:35,487 --> 00:11:37,113
Comrade.
261
00:11:37,114 --> 00:11:38,864
Fancy man!
262
00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:42,410
Fancy man! Fancy man!
263
00:11:42,411 --> 00:11:48,124
My first edict as king will
be to banish the wheel.
264
00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:50,502
I hope you fall in the hole.
265
00:11:55,132 --> 00:11:57,508
Okay, okay, so Dan is
the face of a revolution,
266
00:11:57,509 --> 00:11:59,468
and we're low on
cleaning supplies.
267
00:11:59,469 --> 00:12:01,345
Though I did read
that human urine
268
00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:05,641
is a powerful cleansing
agent, so keep hydrating.
269
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:07,893
And I'm testing the limits
of how much a human hand
270
00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,603
can be exposed to lye.
271
00:12:09,604 --> 00:12:11,440
It's minimal to none.
272
00:12:17,195 --> 00:12:18,696
Tell me that's normal.
273
00:12:18,697 --> 00:12:21,116
Tell me that's how
Postmates delivers now.
274
00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:24,869
What is going on here?
275
00:12:24,870 --> 00:12:26,579
Murray's garbage
guy fell through.
276
00:12:26,580 --> 00:12:27,913
So to get rid of the garbage,
277
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:30,583
we're floating it
out the window.
278
00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:35,421
If my calculations are
correct, and I know they are,
279
00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,256
this should be landing gently
280
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:39,175
in the Passaic County
Transfer Station
281
00:12:39,176 --> 00:12:42,136
in T-minus four hours.
282
00:12:42,137 --> 00:12:44,764
Fly true, bag of turkey bones.
283
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,310
This is how you're getting
rid of our garbage?
284
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:51,645
The plot of "Up"?
285
00:12:51,646 --> 00:12:53,981
We are so screwed.
286
00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,900
You have to make
things right with Bert.
287
00:12:55,901 --> 00:12:57,443
What do you want me to do?
288
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:59,111
You saw the way
she snapped at me.
289
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,946
That was worse than
the time I asked Dan
290
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:04,116
if he had Olympic fever.
291
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:05,659
I think there's something
else going on with her.
292
00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,536
What are you saying?
293
00:13:07,537 --> 00:13:09,288
The strange lady who throws
all the trash in a mystery hole
294
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:12,666
might have a complicated
personal life?
295
00:13:12,667 --> 00:13:15,044
I guess I really don't
know anything about Bert.
296
00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:18,131
In my phone, she's just
"in case you spill again."
297
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:22,259
Maybe I am a jerk. I
mean, she knows about us.
298
00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:24,011
She even knew I
was a Sagittarius.
299
00:13:24,012 --> 00:13:25,638
Which is crazy,
because I work so hard
300
00:13:25,639 --> 00:13:29,058
to lead with my Libra
moon and Virgo rising.
301
00:13:29,059 --> 00:13:30,976
Well, she handles our garbage.
302
00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:33,562
You could probably learn a lot
about someone from their trash.
303
00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:35,272
Wyatt, you're a genius.
304
00:13:35,273 --> 00:13:36,649
We have to go
through her garbage.
305
00:13:36,650 --> 00:13:38,651
No, that's not on the wheel.
306
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:41,278
And I only answer
to the wheel now.
307
00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:43,030
Don't you see?
308
00:13:43,031 --> 00:13:44,823
This is how we're gonna find
out what's bothering her
309
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:46,700
and why she's being so brat.
310
00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:48,827
Still not right.
311
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:52,164
Wow, you can learn a lot about
someone from their trash.
312
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:54,416
Like this guy's wife is
definitely cheating on him.
313
00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:57,169
- [ Laughing ]
- Oh, man, what a loser.
314
00:13:57,170 --> 00:14:00,423
Oh, wait. That's...
That's my trash.
315
00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:04,260
You know, I just
want to thank you
316
00:14:04,261 --> 00:14:06,262
for welcoming me with open arms
317
00:14:06,263 --> 00:14:09,473
and open boxes of baked goods.
318
00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:13,602
No one will support you
more by cleaning less.
319
00:14:13,603 --> 00:14:16,605
Oh, I stand with
you. I see you.
320
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:19,608
[ Sniffs ] I... Oh! Mm.
321
00:14:19,609 --> 00:14:22,611
I'm starting to smell
you. Um, you know what?
322
00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:24,613
Excuse me. Go ahead. Strike,
strike, strike, strike.
323
00:14:24,614 --> 00:14:26,282
Strike, strike. Strike.
324
00:14:26,283 --> 00:14:28,492
Oh, Julianne, the... the
drops are wearing off.
325
00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:30,911
- I need a hit.
- So this is where you've been?
326
00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:33,205
I had to go to that Times
Square porno theater
327
00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,791
all by myself like a weirdo.
328
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,168
I was the only one who
stayed through the credits.
329
00:14:38,169 --> 00:14:40,212
I mean, people really
have no appreciation
330
00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:42,506
for how much work
goes into those films.
331
00:14:42,507 --> 00:14:44,466
- Fine, fine.
- No, this is where the perks are.
332
00:14:44,467 --> 00:14:47,511
These... These garbage jockeys
can get me sanitation plates.
333
00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:50,598
I'll be able to block any
fire hydrant in the city.
334
00:14:50,599 --> 00:14:52,099
This wasn't the deal.
335
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,101
No, I didn't share
my stash with you
336
00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:58,230
so that you could be the Che
Guevara of the hole people.
337
00:14:58,231 --> 00:15:01,192
They've already put
my face on a shirt.
338
00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:04,403
Uh-huh. No, Julianne, please.
339
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:05,487
Look, look, look, look, look.
340
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:07,990
I just need just a taste
341
00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:10,492
of that sweet ear juice.
342
00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,161
Just... Just to get
me through the day.
343
00:15:12,162 --> 00:15:14,538
Come on, baby,
come on, you know.
344
00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:17,499
We've had some good times
together, haven't we?
345
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:20,502
Oh, Dan, I hate
seeing you like this.
346
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:22,630
But if you really
gotta have the drops...
347
00:15:22,631 --> 00:15:23,964
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
348
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,799
Then they're right... here.
349
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,469
What? Yes.
350
00:15:37,896 --> 00:15:39,229
Will you just get in?
351
00:15:39,230 --> 00:15:42,232
It's cleaner than
most subway cars.
352
00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:43,776
I need your wingspan.
353
00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:45,152
It'll take forever to
find Bert's garbage
354
00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:47,488
with my T-Rex arms.
355
00:15:47,489 --> 00:15:49,073
Perhaps I should have
said this earlier,
356
00:15:49,074 --> 00:15:51,533
but a major characteristic
of germophobia
357
00:15:51,534 --> 00:15:54,078
is not wanting to
jump in dumpsters.
358
00:15:54,079 --> 00:15:55,746
If you don't want to help me,
359
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:57,665
you should at least get
in here to help yourself.
360
00:15:57,666 --> 00:16:01,710
You clearly have control issues.
You need to embrace the chaos.
361
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:05,923
- Counterpoint...
- You have deli meat on your neck.
362
00:16:05,924 --> 00:16:07,424
Okay, fine.
363
00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:09,677
Just trying to help.
364
00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:11,970
Aah! Aah! Wyatt, help!
365
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:15,432
There's a trash monster,
and it's pulling me down!
366
00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:17,476
Jump in and help me!
367
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:21,146
Nice try, but everyone
knows the garbage monster
368
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,981
would eat the black guy first.
369
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:25,275
- Forget it.
- Sorry I bothered you.
370
00:16:25,276 --> 00:16:26,777
[ Rustling ]
371
00:16:26,778 --> 00:16:28,529
God.
372
00:16:28,530 --> 00:16:30,989
I think I'm caught on something.
373
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:34,159
My foot's stuck.
I-I can't move.
374
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:36,286
- Oh, oh.
- You're telling the truth.
375
00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:38,122
Uh, okay.
376
00:16:38,123 --> 00:16:40,416
Try to reach your
leg with your mouth.
377
00:16:40,417 --> 00:16:41,917
You can chew it off.
378
00:16:41,918 --> 00:16:43,585
Wyatt!
379
00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:45,629
Alright.
380
00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:47,549
Give me your hand.
381
00:16:49,384 --> 00:16:51,678
- Oh, I'm loose.
- Aah!
382
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:55,973
You did it!
383
00:16:55,974 --> 00:16:58,559
Why are you doing this to me?!
384
00:16:58,560 --> 00:17:00,686
I played your game.
I spun your wheel.
385
00:17:00,687 --> 00:17:02,229
I danced for you eight times
386
00:17:02,230 --> 00:17:03,897
and came up with a
new move every time.
387
00:17:03,898 --> 00:17:05,524
The running man,
the jogging man,
388
00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:07,151
and the walking man
are the same dance.
389
00:17:07,152 --> 00:17:09,820
You were just getting tired.
390
00:17:09,821 --> 00:17:13,073
You couldn't let me just have
one thing that I'm weird about.
391
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:14,658
Now I'm in a dumpster.
392
00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:18,704
I'm covered in trash,
and it's disgusting.
393
00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:23,542
But I guess it hasn't
killed me, which is nice.
394
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:26,754
You know what? I don't
hate that fuzzy lamp.
395
00:17:26,755 --> 00:17:28,672
I believe that's a squirrel
who choked on a light bulb.
396
00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:30,967
We're just gonna cover
that with some trash.
397
00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:34,219
Julianne! Julianne!
398
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:35,929
Alright, one move
and these drops
399
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:37,347
get dropped into the dropster.
400
00:17:37,348 --> 00:17:38,891
What?
401
00:17:38,892 --> 00:17:40,809
Dumpster.
402
00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:42,644
Oh, I knew I couldn't trust you.
403
00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:45,189
The real day terror
was you all along.
404
00:17:45,190 --> 00:17:46,857
Oh, no, this is on you, Dan.
405
00:17:46,858 --> 00:17:49,568
'Cause you lost sight
of what's important.
406
00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:52,362
But instead, it's come to this.
407
00:17:52,363 --> 00:17:54,991
Aah! No!
408
00:17:58,161 --> 00:18:00,120
Julianne, you still up there?
409
00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:03,415
I seem to be stuck halfway down.
410
00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:06,668
Ah, but in so many ways...
411
00:18:06,669 --> 00:18:08,670
you've already hit bottom.
412
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,507
[ Sniffs ]
413
00:18:15,386 --> 00:18:19,056
Oh, wait a second.
414
00:18:19,057 --> 00:18:21,099
I think this is Bert's trash.
415
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,353
It's filled with
condolence cards.
416
00:18:24,354 --> 00:18:27,147
"My deepest
sympathies for Todd."
417
00:18:27,148 --> 00:18:28,732
Her alligator died.
This is great.
418
00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:30,275
I mean, not great
that it's dead,
419
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:32,319
great that we know
what's bothering her.
420
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:35,280
Abby, is that you?
421
00:18:35,281 --> 00:18:38,033
Dan? What are you doing
in the trash chute?
422
00:18:38,034 --> 00:18:40,786
Oh, just chillin'.
423
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:43,247
If you see any expired
ear medication,
424
00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:46,750
could you be a dear and
just throw it up here?
425
00:18:46,751 --> 00:18:48,920
[ Solemn music plays ]
426
00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:53,799
I really appreciate
you doing this, Judge.
427
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,176
It's exactly what Todd
would have wanted.
428
00:18:56,177 --> 00:19:02,177
{\an8}♪
429
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:11,942
We are gathered here
today to honor the memory
430
00:19:11,943 --> 00:19:13,527
of Todd the alligator.
431
00:19:13,528 --> 00:19:15,195
If she was here,
she would remind us
432
00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:17,948
to appreciate all the
special people in our lives,
433
00:19:17,949 --> 00:19:22,703
whether it be friends,
alligators, or co-workers.
434
00:19:22,704 --> 00:19:24,288
Actually, if she were here,
435
00:19:24,289 --> 00:19:27,791
she would try to
violently maul all of us.
436
00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:29,168
God, I miss her.
437
00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:35,049
She was a former
military alligator.
438
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,720
See you later, alligator.
439
00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:44,182
Well, as a Louisianan,
440
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:46,018
I've been to a lot of
alligator funerals.
441
00:19:46,019 --> 00:19:48,687
And this one is right up there.
442
00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:51,523
Yeah, but I bet those didn't
end a janitors' strike.
443
00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:53,191
Now if only there was
something we could do
444
00:19:53,192 --> 00:19:54,985
about the garbage strike.
445
00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:57,696
Actually, word on the street
is the strike is over.
446
00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:59,489
How do you know that?
447
00:19:59,490 --> 00:20:01,074
I found a hearing
aid in the dumpster,
448
00:20:01,075 --> 00:20:03,952
so I can hear people
talking on the street.
449
00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:07,164
I like to think we made it
possible in some small way.
450
00:20:07,165 --> 00:20:09,082
Oh, we made it
possible in a big way
451
00:20:09,083 --> 00:20:11,668
when our trash balloons started
exploding all over the city.
452
00:20:11,669 --> 00:20:15,047
Yeah, nothing like a bunch
of trash falling from the sky
453
00:20:15,048 --> 00:20:18,216
to get people back to
the bargaining table.
454
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,427
I guess you hurled yourself
into that trash chute
455
00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:22,721
- for nothing.
- Well, no, not for nothing.
456
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:26,892
Once I hit the dumpster,
I found this cool lamp.
457
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:30,646
Also, spending the day with
you was, um, enjoyable.
458
00:20:30,647 --> 00:20:34,191
We should do it again.
Next garbage strike.
459
00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:37,110
I'll hold on to the
bottle just in case.
460
00:20:37,111 --> 00:20:39,780
You know, the beauty of
expired ear medication
461
00:20:39,781 --> 00:20:43,075
is that it just keeps
on getting more expired.
462
00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:44,868
[ Electricity crackling ]
463
00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:47,537
That's weird. The cello
case is stuck on something.
464
00:20:47,538 --> 00:20:49,290
I think it's a power line.
465
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:54,170
{\an8}Yep, it's a power line.
466
00:20:55,838 --> 00:20:57,130
{\an8}I'm hearing two Con Ed guys
467
00:20:57,131 --> 00:20:59,383
{\an8}have a conversation
in an elevator.
468
00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:02,844
{\an8}Seems there's a
citywide blackout.
469
00:21:02,845 --> 00:21:05,847
{\an8}Oh, and they're in love.
470
00:21:05,848 --> 00:21:07,516
{\an8}What do you say, Dan?
471
00:21:07,517 --> 00:21:09,768
{\an8}You want to hit up a bar
and get some free drinks?
472
00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:11,395
{\an8}Yeah. Yeah. Sure,
sure, sure. Why not?
473
00:21:11,396 --> 00:21:12,813
{\an8}You know what?
Bring the drops.
474
00:21:12,814 --> 00:21:15,399
{\an8}Might as well make
it psychedelic.
475
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:16,942
{\an8}Oh, get your hand...
476
00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:20,071
{\an8}Sting, is that you?
35922
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof