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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,835 --> 00:00:03,072 Mark, a soft pretzel is not dinner. 2 00:00:03,072 --> 00:00:03,741 That's dessert. 3 00:00:03,741 --> 00:00:04,441 No, David, 4 00:00:04,676 --> 00:00:06,614 the cinnamon sugar soft pretzel is dessert, 5 00:00:06,614 --> 00:00:09,252 but the cheese pretzel can absolutely be dinner. 6 00:00:09,319 --> 00:00:10,888 It's got no nutritional value. 7 00:00:10,888 --> 00:00:12,759 - Neither does lettuce, David. 8 00:00:12,759 --> 00:00:14,395 No thanks, pal. I'm good. 9 00:00:14,395 --> 00:00:14,763 Huh? 10 00:00:15,296 --> 00:00:16,399 I'm not here to sign up for the Marines. 11 00:00:16,567 --> 00:00:17,569 Yeah, I didn't ask you. 12 00:00:17,836 --> 00:00:20,207 Yeah, but you were gonna ask me. You were thinking about it. 13 00:00:20,307 --> 00:00:21,309 Actually, I wasn't. 14 00:00:21,376 --> 00:00:23,213 Oh please. I see you sizing me up, 15 00:00:23,213 --> 00:00:25,350 thinking "That guy's officer material." 16 00:00:25,350 --> 00:00:26,921 And I get it, I mean I'm flattered, okay, 17 00:00:26,921 --> 00:00:28,056 but I'm good. Seriously. 18 00:00:28,056 --> 00:00:29,593 Yeah with all due respect, 19 00:00:29,593 --> 00:00:31,163 I don't think you got what it takes. 20 00:00:31,163 --> 00:00:33,166 Oh yeah? And what gives you that idea? 21 00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:34,603 Because you're fat and you're old 22 00:00:34,603 --> 00:00:36,138 and you've got cheese sauce on your face? 23 00:00:36,205 --> 00:00:38,142 Okay, pfft. And you're the expert? 24 00:00:38,142 --> 00:00:39,212 I'm a Navy Seal. 25 00:00:39,312 --> 00:00:40,781 Oh wow, I did BUDS. 26 00:00:40,781 --> 00:00:42,317 I carried some logs on a beach 27 00:00:42,317 --> 00:00:44,022 and then I tied a knot in a pool. 28 00:00:44,022 --> 00:00:44,890 Get outta here dude. 29 00:00:45,491 --> 00:00:47,663 BUDS is the most challenging military training in the world. 30 00:00:47,763 --> 00:00:49,132 You think you can handle that? 31 00:00:49,132 --> 00:00:52,204 What are you, 5'8," 45 years old, 32 00:00:52,204 --> 00:00:53,139 probably 200 lbs? 33 00:00:53,139 --> 00:00:55,344 Yeah, but it's what's in here that counts. 34 00:00:55,344 --> 00:00:57,314 What's that? A couple of soft pretzels? 35 00:00:57,314 --> 00:00:58,584 Yo give me that sign up sheet. 36 00:00:58,584 --> 00:01:00,087 You're gonna be feeling pretty silly 37 00:01:00,087 --> 00:01:01,323 when I'm back here in a few weeks 38 00:01:01,323 --> 00:01:03,326 with a beret greener than Kermit's ass. 39 00:01:03,326 --> 00:01:05,832 Yeah that's the Army Special Forces. 40 00:01:06,199 --> 00:01:06,900 You a writer? 41 00:01:06,934 --> 00:01:09,639 I am actually, how 'd you know? 42 00:01:10,508 --> 00:01:11,476 [♪♪♪♪♪] 43 00:01:11,744 --> 00:01:14,315 ♪ Well, I used to work at a hot dog factory. ♪ 44 00:01:14,315 --> 00:01:16,319 ♪ Until them robots came along. ♪ 45 00:01:16,486 --> 00:01:18,056 ♪ And now there is no job for me ♪ 46 00:01:18,190 --> 00:01:20,695 ♪ But I get 3,000 bucks a month ♪ 47 00:01:20,695 --> 00:01:24,703 ♪ Thanks to UBI 48 00:01:24,936 --> 00:01:28,611 ♪ Now we're Universal Basic Guys. ♪ 49 00:01:28,611 --> 00:01:30,480 ♪ It may not sound like much. ♪ 50 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:33,621 ♪ But we're still gonna try ♪ 51 00:01:33,621 --> 00:01:38,697 ♪ We're just Universal Basic Guys ♪ 52 00:01:44,542 --> 00:01:46,412 Argh...Mark... 53 00:01:46,412 --> 00:01:46,981 Hey hun. 54 00:01:47,114 --> 00:01:47,950 You said you'd make the bed. 55 00:01:48,216 --> 00:01:50,522 Uh, actually I said I'd think about making the bed 56 00:01:50,522 --> 00:01:52,859 and I thought about it and I've decided that making 57 00:01:52,859 --> 00:01:54,295 the bed is a waste of time 58 00:01:54,362 --> 00:01:55,665 because you're just gonna mess it up again. 59 00:01:55,665 --> 00:01:58,303 It's not about the bed. It's about the gesture. 60 00:01:58,303 --> 00:02:01,176 This is a shared space, and I'd like it to look nice. 61 00:02:01,176 --> 00:02:02,411 Sorry, Tam. I can't. 62 00:02:02,579 --> 00:02:05,050 Hank and I are flying out to San Diego to start BUDS. 63 00:02:05,050 --> 00:02:05,785 When I get back 64 00:02:05,919 --> 00:02:07,755 you're gonna be married to a Navy Seal. 65 00:02:07,755 --> 00:02:09,859 Oh nice. What's his name? 66 00:02:09,859 --> 00:02:10,795 Mark Hoagies. 67 00:02:11,095 --> 00:02:13,166 But they're gonna probably call me Eagle Eye or something. 68 00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:14,536 I'm gonna be a sniper. 69 00:02:14,536 --> 00:02:15,838 Or I'm gonna be one of the guys, you know, 70 00:02:15,838 --> 00:02:17,709 that explodes the doors. Pow! 71 00:02:17,709 --> 00:02:18,645 Okay, Rambo. 72 00:02:18,645 --> 00:02:21,015 Well, Navy Seals can still make a bed. 73 00:02:21,015 --> 00:02:22,084 Wish I could, Tam, 74 00:02:22,084 --> 00:02:23,587 but my country needs me. 75 00:02:26,158 --> 00:02:27,662 Paperwork in your right hand. 76 00:02:27,662 --> 00:02:28,396 Bags in your left. 77 00:02:28,396 --> 00:02:29,833 Line up shoulder-to-shoulder. 78 00:02:29,833 --> 00:02:31,136 Now! Let's go! 79 00:02:31,136 --> 00:02:31,937 Let's go! Let's go! 80 00:02:32,004 --> 00:02:34,208 Oh man, this is classic, right Hank? 81 00:02:34,275 --> 00:02:35,143 Ha, ha...Classic. 82 00:02:35,477 --> 00:02:37,014 Yo, I bet he's gonna like call us "maggots." 83 00:02:37,014 --> 00:02:39,285 I am Chief Petty Officer Phillips. 84 00:02:39,285 --> 00:02:42,457 From this point on you will refer to me as "Chief." 85 00:02:42,592 --> 00:02:45,531 You will also respond with "aye" instead of yes. 86 00:02:45,598 --> 00:02:46,733 Is that clear? 87 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:47,334 Aye Chief! 88 00:02:47,502 --> 00:02:49,238 Sir Yes Sir! Crap. Aye Chief! 89 00:02:49,238 --> 00:02:50,240 Yo, you see that bell, Hank? 90 00:02:50,541 --> 00:02:53,514 That's the “Quitters Bell ”. No way I'm ringing that thing. 91 00:02:53,814 --> 00:02:54,448 Here we go. 92 00:02:54,650 --> 00:02:57,054 Take off those sunglasses, maggot. 93 00:02:57,054 --> 00:02:57,889 - Classic. 94 00:02:58,056 --> 00:02:58,958 Hey! 95 00:02:59,058 --> 00:02:59,693 Ah, c'mon. 96 00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:01,530 Those were real Oakleys, boss. 97 00:03:01,530 --> 00:03:02,431 It's Chief. 98 00:03:02,431 --> 00:03:04,368 And I don't give a crap what they were. 99 00:03:04,435 --> 00:03:07,508 Okay okay. I get it. All part of the show. 100 00:03:07,575 --> 00:03:09,579 Well, Chief, bring it on. 101 00:03:09,579 --> 00:03:11,717 'Cause I ain't ringing that bell. 102 00:03:11,717 --> 00:03:12,451 Oorah! 103 00:03:12,919 --> 00:03:14,989 You're absolutely right; you're never ringing that bell. 104 00:03:14,989 --> 00:03:19,065 Because that bell is for "BUDS" Navy Seal training. 105 00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:20,434 You are enlisted in 106 00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:23,674 “Navy Reserve Reserves Basic Training! ” 107 00:03:24,174 --> 00:03:25,711 So when you say reserve 108 00:03:25,711 --> 00:03:27,916 do you mean like in whiskey how the reserve 109 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:29,185 is the special, elite batch? 110 00:03:29,185 --> 00:03:32,726 No! This is the exact opposite of that. 111 00:03:32,726 --> 00:03:34,629 Okay, well then I think I'm in the wrong place. 112 00:03:34,629 --> 00:03:34,996 Let's go Hank. 113 00:03:35,397 --> 00:03:36,934 Hey! You're not going anywhere. 114 00:03:36,934 --> 00:03:38,236 You want to be in BUDS, 115 00:03:38,236 --> 00:03:41,242 first you gotta make it past “Me ”! 116 00:03:41,476 --> 00:03:43,981 No problem, Chief. 117 00:03:45,116 --> 00:03:46,921 [alarm beeps] 118 00:03:47,121 --> 00:03:49,559 [action music] 119 00:03:50,494 --> 00:03:51,997 -Hey! Hank! -Huh? 120 00:03:51,997 --> 00:03:53,332 Come on! Let's go. 121 00:03:54,168 --> 00:03:57,407 [action music] 122 00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:04,288 Boom, now we're in Buds. 123 00:04:06,660 --> 00:04:08,530 When did you become so patriotic? 124 00:04:08,597 --> 00:04:10,635 Well I have a very special guest coming over 125 00:04:10,635 --> 00:04:12,270 and I want him to feel comfortable. 126 00:04:12,270 --> 00:04:14,208 Are you pledging a fraternity? 127 00:04:14,275 --> 00:04:16,580 No, so I met this Navy Seal and-- get this-- 128 00:04:16,580 --> 00:04:19,520 he wants me to ghost write his memoir! 129 00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:21,422 This could be my American Sniper! 130 00:04:21,422 --> 00:04:23,527 And you're sure this guy's legit? 131 00:04:23,527 --> 00:04:26,733 He's not just some random crazy dude you invited into our house? 132 00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:27,535 Wow, Andrea. 133 00:04:27,769 --> 00:04:30,240 This man is a decorated member of our military. 134 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:31,577 Show some respect! -[doorbell] 135 00:04:31,877 --> 00:04:32,879 Oh my god. He's here. 136 00:04:32,879 --> 00:04:34,382 Out. Out. Okay, wow. 137 00:04:34,382 --> 00:04:35,885 I can't be in my own living room? 138 00:04:36,019 --> 00:04:37,121 No. You're giving off some real 139 00:04:37,121 --> 00:04:39,391 anti-second amendment vibes. 140 00:04:40,393 --> 00:04:42,899 The chopper dropped us about a mile from the village... 141 00:04:42,899 --> 00:04:43,768 it was pretty rough terrain, 142 00:04:43,834 --> 00:04:46,439 like the devil himself had dragged a claw 143 00:04:46,439 --> 00:04:48,009 across the land... 144 00:04:48,009 --> 00:04:49,445 me and the boys 145 00:04:49,445 --> 00:04:52,151 we had no choice, we just pressed on, 146 00:04:52,151 --> 00:04:53,521 I mean we had a job to do... 147 00:04:53,521 --> 00:04:55,323 Wow. This is incredible. 148 00:04:55,323 --> 00:04:58,196 And I'm sorry this was with Seal Team Six? 149 00:04:58,196 --> 00:04:59,031 No. 150 00:04:59,031 --> 00:05:00,501 This was Seal Team X. 151 00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:02,170 Hm. Never heard of them. 152 00:05:02,170 --> 00:05:03,372 Well there's a reason for that. 153 00:05:03,372 --> 00:05:05,377 Ooooh. Juicy. 154 00:05:05,410 --> 00:05:07,314 Oh it gets juicier, bud. 155 00:05:07,314 --> 00:05:08,784 The tribe greeted us pretty warmly. 156 00:05:08,784 --> 00:05:11,055 Simple people, but highly intelligent. 157 00:05:11,055 --> 00:05:12,258 And what tribe was this? 158 00:05:12,258 --> 00:05:14,563 The Pashtuns? The Tajiks? 159 00:05:14,563 --> 00:05:16,634 The Schmagegglebops. 160 00:05:16,634 --> 00:05:17,367 Hm. 161 00:05:17,434 --> 00:05:18,604 And what was the mission again? 162 00:05:18,604 --> 00:05:20,741 There was, like, a terrorist or something? 163 00:05:20,741 --> 00:05:24,048 Argh, All we were told was that this was a high value target 164 00:05:24,114 --> 00:05:25,818 and to execute on sight. 165 00:05:25,818 --> 00:05:29,860 Only intel we had was that he was about 4'5" blue-skin, 166 00:05:29,860 --> 00:05:33,066 big white beard with a giant gold jewel in his forehead. 167 00:05:33,066 --> 00:05:34,368 Blue skin? 168 00:05:34,368 --> 00:05:37,207 So is that like a ceremonial body paint thing? 169 00:05:37,207 --> 00:05:37,842 No., no, no... 170 00:05:38,043 --> 00:05:40,581 These guys are full on blue gnomes. 171 00:05:40,581 --> 00:05:42,652 Then they got this radical sect 172 00:05:42,652 --> 00:05:45,859 that's trying to ethnically cleanse the Dillydoos. 173 00:05:45,859 --> 00:05:46,593 Dillydoos? 174 00:05:46,593 --> 00:05:47,728 Yeah they're like these 175 00:05:47,829 --> 00:05:50,801 orange fuzzy things with googly eyes. 176 00:05:51,035 --> 00:05:52,605 Poor bastards. 177 00:05:52,972 --> 00:05:53,975 Right. 178 00:05:54,342 --> 00:05:55,845 Alright ladies, 179 00:05:55,845 --> 00:05:58,784 hope you enjoyed your last sleep 'til Friday. 180 00:05:58,784 --> 00:06:01,657 Are you ready for the hardest week of your life? 181 00:06:01,657 --> 00:06:03,359 Oh hell yeah, Hank. Did you hear that? 182 00:06:03,359 --> 00:06:04,529 We're just in time for Hell Week. 183 00:06:04,529 --> 00:06:06,099 That's like the filet mignon of BUDS. 184 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:07,468 Uh, whose bed is this? 185 00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:08,269 Mine, Sir. 186 00:06:08,336 --> 00:06:09,071 What's your name? 187 00:06:09,071 --> 00:06:10,073 Hoagies, sir. 188 00:06:10,073 --> 00:06:11,510 But you can call me Eagle Eye. 189 00:06:11,510 --> 00:06:12,879 That is my cool sniper name. 190 00:06:12,879 --> 00:06:14,381 - You've been here the whole time? 191 00:06:14,381 --> 00:06:15,249 I don't recognize you. 192 00:06:15,249 --> 00:06:17,254 - I try to make myself invisible, sir. 193 00:06:17,254 --> 00:06:18,089 It's a sniper thing. 194 00:06:18,089 --> 00:06:18,624 - How old are you? 195 00:06:18,624 --> 00:06:20,194 Uh...twenty-five sir. 196 00:06:20,194 --> 00:06:20,895 You're twenty-five? 197 00:06:20,962 --> 00:06:23,332 Damn boy. You grew up hard, huh? 198 00:06:23,332 --> 00:06:26,507 Uh...yeah it's uh...progeria. 199 00:06:26,507 --> 00:06:27,308 What the hell is that? 200 00:06:27,475 --> 00:06:29,713 Genetic disease that makes you look old, sir. 201 00:06:29,713 --> 00:06:32,919 I'm sorta the GI Jane of progeria people, sir. 202 00:06:32,919 --> 00:06:33,654 Right. 203 00:06:33,954 --> 00:06:35,758 First you better make that bed, recruit. 204 00:06:35,758 --> 00:06:36,860 Come on dude, we're elite special forces. 205 00:06:36,994 --> 00:06:39,533 Can't we like get the army guys to make our beds or something? 206 00:06:39,533 --> 00:06:41,637 You're not elite special anything. 207 00:06:41,637 --> 00:06:43,373 You're not even a tadpole. 208 00:06:43,373 --> 00:06:45,109 Make the bed. Now. 209 00:06:45,109 --> 00:06:46,245 - Ah, Yes sir. 210 00:06:46,445 --> 00:06:47,815 Okay, let's see here... 211 00:06:48,049 --> 00:06:49,051 Fold the sheet here. 212 00:06:49,051 --> 00:06:50,688 That looks about right. That's right, yeah? 213 00:06:50,688 --> 00:06:53,794 C'mon recruit. This is basic boot camp stuff. 214 00:06:53,794 --> 00:06:55,363 Exactly! So let's go to the beach 215 00:06:55,363 --> 00:06:56,567 and lift some logs. Come on. 216 00:06:56,567 --> 00:06:57,935 Nobody leaves this bunk 217 00:06:57,935 --> 00:07:00,874 until I can bounce a quarter off your bed. 218 00:07:02,143 --> 00:07:02,945 Aw damn, 219 00:07:03,112 --> 00:07:04,950 that's the tightest bed I've ever seen. 220 00:07:04,950 --> 00:07:05,818 Yeah see that's no good. 221 00:07:06,085 --> 00:07:07,822 Nobody actually wants to sleep in a bed like that. 222 00:07:07,822 --> 00:07:08,924 It's not fluffy enough...sir. 223 00:07:08,991 --> 00:07:11,329 Recruits. Get down and beat your faces 224 00:07:11,329 --> 00:07:13,066 until Hoagies makes the bed. 225 00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:14,802 [grunting] 226 00:07:15,303 --> 00:07:16,740 Let's go Hoagies! 227 00:07:17,041 --> 00:07:18,042 Aye sir. 228 00:07:18,978 --> 00:07:19,546 Okay, uhhhh. 229 00:07:20,214 --> 00:07:22,551 Just missed breakfast, boys. We'll stay as long as it takes. 230 00:07:22,551 --> 00:07:23,587 Okay, come on. 231 00:07:23,587 --> 00:07:26,158 I wanna see hospital corners! 232 00:07:26,158 --> 00:07:27,093 Come on, Hoagies. 233 00:07:27,260 --> 00:07:29,365 You're really letting your brothers down, Hoagies. 234 00:07:29,365 --> 00:07:30,366 Relax, okay. 235 00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:31,168 I'm working on it. 236 00:07:31,703 --> 00:07:34,041 Alright, give me some space. Just give me some space. 237 00:07:34,174 --> 00:07:35,410 [shouting] 238 00:07:35,611 --> 00:07:36,780 You're all over me! 239 00:07:36,780 --> 00:07:37,982 You guys are all over me. 240 00:07:37,982 --> 00:07:38,551 Just get off! 241 00:07:38,618 --> 00:07:39,919 [ding, ding, ding] 242 00:07:39,919 --> 00:07:40,855 I wanna go home. 243 00:07:40,855 --> 00:07:42,659 I wanna go home. I wanna go home. 244 00:07:42,725 --> 00:07:44,061 Well, I'll be damned. 245 00:07:51,342 --> 00:07:52,344 Mark? 246 00:07:52,344 --> 00:07:53,781 Back already, eh? 247 00:07:54,215 --> 00:07:55,851 Missed you so much. 248 00:07:57,588 --> 00:07:58,323 How was it? 249 00:07:58,758 --> 00:08:00,093 I'd rather not talk about it. 250 00:08:00,393 --> 00:08:02,264 Right. Well, I'm gonna go to work. 251 00:08:02,264 --> 00:08:03,834 I'll let you do your thing. 252 00:08:04,836 --> 00:08:05,269 Mark? 253 00:08:05,838 --> 00:08:06,472 What's up? 254 00:08:06,472 --> 00:08:08,075 I said I'm gonna go to work. 255 00:08:08,075 --> 00:08:10,514 I assume you'll be getting into your next silly thing. 256 00:08:10,514 --> 00:08:12,518 Buying a jackhammer or a snowmobile 257 00:08:12,518 --> 00:08:13,787 or something stupid... 258 00:08:13,787 --> 00:08:16,359 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jackmobile. 259 00:08:16,359 --> 00:08:18,095 Snowhammer. Yeah. Got it. 260 00:08:26,245 --> 00:08:27,549 You getting in, or... 261 00:08:27,549 --> 00:08:30,019 Yeah hon, I just... need a second. 262 00:08:32,457 --> 00:08:34,127 [alarm beeps] 263 00:08:34,963 --> 00:08:35,831 [yawn] 264 00:08:37,134 --> 00:08:38,002 Huh? 265 00:08:42,144 --> 00:08:43,312 Hey Mark. 266 00:08:43,312 --> 00:08:45,885 Did you sleep in bed last night? 267 00:08:45,885 --> 00:08:47,822 No, Ma'am. If I don't sleep in the bed 268 00:08:47,822 --> 00:08:49,091 I don't gotta make the bed. 269 00:08:49,258 --> 00:08:50,695 I didn't ask you to make the bed. 270 00:08:50,695 --> 00:08:52,131 You were thinking it though. 271 00:08:52,331 --> 00:08:53,867 Argh...No actually, I wasn't. 272 00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:56,105 Sure. Yeah, you think I can't do it, eh? 273 00:08:56,105 --> 00:08:57,609 Just like all the rest of them. Yeah? 274 00:08:57,675 --> 00:08:58,544 You think I'm too dumb? 275 00:08:58,544 --> 00:08:59,746 Uh... What? 276 00:08:59,746 --> 00:09:01,415 Fine. I'll make the damn bed. 277 00:09:01,415 --> 00:09:02,686 You think I can't make a bed? 278 00:09:02,686 --> 00:09:04,087 I can make a bed, dammit! 279 00:09:04,087 --> 00:09:06,425 I ain't afraid of damn, stupid sheets! 280 00:09:06,425 --> 00:09:07,629 Okay... 281 00:09:08,129 --> 00:09:09,297 well I'm going to work. 282 00:09:09,665 --> 00:09:10,868 Blue people? 283 00:09:10,868 --> 00:09:13,306 What're you writing Smurfs fan fiction? 284 00:09:13,373 --> 00:09:14,543 I have no idea. 285 00:09:14,543 --> 00:09:15,611 He keeps calling them like 286 00:09:15,611 --> 00:09:17,413 Schmagegglebops or something. 287 00:09:17,413 --> 00:09:18,048 - Okay, David. 288 00:09:18,482 --> 00:09:20,554 This guy is clearly crazy. You need to end this. 289 00:09:20,988 --> 00:09:22,859 You want me to tell a Navy Seal 290 00:09:22,859 --> 00:09:24,729 that I'm quitting after one session? 291 00:09:24,729 --> 00:09:27,101 These guys are like obsessed with not quitting. 292 00:09:27,101 --> 00:09:30,173 Do you really want to write this thousand page Avatar knockoff? 293 00:09:30,273 --> 00:09:31,008 No, but... 294 00:09:31,208 --> 00:09:33,412 you know how I am with confrontation... 295 00:09:33,412 --> 00:09:35,851 David. Enough. Man up and end it. 296 00:09:35,851 --> 00:09:37,287 Yes ma'am. Sorry ma'am. 297 00:09:38,088 --> 00:09:40,293 Mark? ...Mark? 298 00:09:40,293 --> 00:09:41,461 [sobbing] 299 00:09:41,461 --> 00:09:42,598 I can't do it. 300 00:09:42,598 --> 00:09:43,967 Oh! It's okay. 301 00:09:43,967 --> 00:09:45,971 You don't have to make the bed, Mark. 302 00:09:46,706 --> 00:09:49,177 Oh! It's okay, 303 00:09:49,177 --> 00:09:51,148 it's okay! Shhh. 304 00:09:51,148 --> 00:09:52,985 Something happened to me over there. 305 00:09:52,985 --> 00:09:54,154 Ah...over where? 306 00:09:54,154 --> 00:09:56,491 Ever since I came back stateside, I just, 307 00:09:56,491 --> 00:09:57,728 I haven't been the same you know. 308 00:09:57,728 --> 00:10:00,000 Mark, you were in San Diego... 309 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:00,902 for a day. 310 00:10:01,202 --> 00:10:04,207 Was I? Really? I just... Sorry it all blends together. 311 00:10:04,308 --> 00:10:05,644 The point is, I... 312 00:10:06,011 --> 00:10:07,582 It's just really hard for me to talk about. 313 00:10:07,582 --> 00:10:09,652 You can tell me. It's okay. 314 00:10:10,153 --> 00:10:11,089 [sigh] 315 00:10:11,089 --> 00:10:12,190 I was surrounded... 316 00:10:12,625 --> 00:10:13,426 everyone was yelling. 317 00:10:13,561 --> 00:10:15,631 It was chaos. Sergeant's barking orders. 318 00:10:15,764 --> 00:10:17,066 I see his lips moving 319 00:10:17,066 --> 00:10:20,073 but...all I hear is like...ringing. 320 00:10:20,140 --> 00:10:21,643 I knew the mission, 321 00:10:21,643 --> 00:10:23,246 but...the stakes were so damn high, Tam. 322 00:10:23,246 --> 00:10:26,519 It's like every time I put the fitted sheet on a corner, 323 00:10:26,519 --> 00:10:28,022 the other side would pop off. 324 00:10:28,022 --> 00:10:28,757 Hold on. 325 00:10:28,891 --> 00:10:30,894 Are you talking about making a bed? 326 00:10:30,961 --> 00:10:32,330 That's what this is about? 327 00:10:32,330 --> 00:10:34,401 Yeah...It was horrible. 328 00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:35,437 [snicker] 329 00:10:35,437 --> 00:10:36,305 Oh you think it's funny? 330 00:10:36,439 --> 00:10:37,509 You didn't see what I saw over there, okay! 331 00:10:37,609 --> 00:10:40,246 You don't know what it's like being in the line of fire! 332 00:10:40,246 --> 00:10:41,616 Mark hun, come on. 333 00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:42,918 You're just feeling embarrassed 334 00:10:42,918 --> 00:10:44,421 that you couldn't make it through bootcamp. 335 00:10:44,421 --> 00:10:45,992 I can't believe what I'm hearing. 336 00:10:45,992 --> 00:10:47,628 You're trauma-shaming me! 337 00:10:47,628 --> 00:10:49,264 I thought you supported the troops! 338 00:10:49,264 --> 00:10:49,732 Pfft! 339 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:50,735 Embarrassed!? 340 00:10:50,802 --> 00:10:51,469 That's ridiculous. 341 00:10:51,837 --> 00:10:52,906 I'm actually proud because I got a very serious 342 00:10:52,906 --> 00:10:56,513 and heroic condition that only brave soldiers get! 343 00:10:57,481 --> 00:10:59,686 We didn't want to risk being spotted by the birds 344 00:10:59,686 --> 00:11:01,388 near the wizard school, see, 345 00:11:01,388 --> 00:11:02,291 cause you know, 346 00:11:02,391 --> 00:11:05,230 sometimes the birds are actually wizard kids 347 00:11:05,230 --> 00:11:07,568 doing that animal magic or whatever. 348 00:11:07,568 --> 00:11:08,537 Right. 349 00:11:08,537 --> 00:11:10,708 And where was this again? 350 00:11:10,775 --> 00:11:12,645 Abracadabrastan. 351 00:11:12,779 --> 00:11:14,414 Abracadabrastan. 352 00:11:14,649 --> 00:11:17,020 Listen, I don't think I can do this. 353 00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:18,422 Woah! What are you talking about? 354 00:11:18,422 --> 00:11:19,726 I'm giving you great material! 355 00:11:19,793 --> 00:11:21,228 I know. It's just... 356 00:11:21,228 --> 00:11:23,333 I thought this was gonna be more of a memoir, 357 00:11:23,333 --> 00:11:27,207 and instead you're pitching me Stargate meets 358 00:11:27,207 --> 00:11:30,548 Smurfs meets Candyland or something, you know? 359 00:11:30,548 --> 00:11:32,718 I'm telling you. I was there, man. 360 00:11:32,718 --> 00:11:34,855 I got notes! Pages of notes! 361 00:11:34,922 --> 00:11:36,726 This stuff is as real as it gets! 362 00:11:36,726 --> 00:11:37,595 I know, I'm sure! 363 00:11:37,828 --> 00:11:40,601 Listen, I can recommend a really good therapist if-- 364 00:11:40,601 --> 00:11:42,705 Hey man! I'm not crazy! 365 00:11:42,705 --> 00:11:44,141 I need you to tell my story! 366 00:11:44,141 --> 00:11:46,580 Well I can't write it if I don't believe it. 367 00:11:46,580 --> 00:11:47,815 Well then, I'll show you. 368 00:11:47,815 --> 00:11:49,251 You're coming on a ride along. 369 00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:51,455 Yeah, I don't know if I have time for a ride along... 370 00:11:51,455 --> 00:11:53,158 Alright sure! Sounds great. 371 00:11:55,597 --> 00:11:56,465 Yo one more... 372 00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:57,568 We're closing, friend. 373 00:11:57,568 --> 00:11:59,338 Last call was thirty minutes ago. 374 00:11:59,338 --> 00:12:00,707 C'mon dude. I got PTSD. 375 00:12:00,707 --> 00:12:02,511 You look like you've had a long day. 376 00:12:02,511 --> 00:12:03,881 Maybe it's time to go to bed. 377 00:12:03,881 --> 00:12:05,450 What did you say to me? 378 00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:06,018 - Nothing. 379 00:12:06,519 --> 00:12:08,022 I just said maybe it's time for bed. That's all. 380 00:12:08,156 --> 00:12:11,094 Hey, man. It's okay. He didn't mean any harm. 381 00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:15,269 You're a Seal, huh? 382 00:12:15,269 --> 00:12:16,873 I don't really like to talk about it. 383 00:12:16,873 --> 00:12:18,309 Hey man, I get it. 384 00:12:18,309 --> 00:12:19,512 The name's Arnold. 385 00:12:19,512 --> 00:12:21,315 What's up dude. Eagle Eye. 386 00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:23,920 Eagle Eye. Cool name. 387 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:25,991 I had a feeling you was a sniper. 388 00:12:25,991 --> 00:12:28,129 Oh yeah? Do I give off sniper vibes? 389 00:12:28,129 --> 00:12:31,068 Big time. I bet you seen some stuff. 390 00:12:31,068 --> 00:12:33,006 Oh dude. You don't even know, okay. 391 00:12:33,006 --> 00:12:34,876 I got crazy PTSD actually. 392 00:12:34,876 --> 00:12:35,944 Proud of you, man. 393 00:12:36,011 --> 00:12:37,414 Not easy sharing our pain 394 00:12:37,414 --> 00:12:40,387 but it's the first step towards feeling whole again. 395 00:12:40,387 --> 00:12:41,756 So what's the second step? 396 00:12:41,756 --> 00:12:44,562 For some, it's about moving on with life. 397 00:12:44,562 --> 00:12:46,967 Finding joy in family or whatever. 398 00:12:47,401 --> 00:12:48,369 But for other men, 399 00:12:48,737 --> 00:12:49,606 the few, 400 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:52,344 the rare spartan breed of iron-hearted, 401 00:12:52,344 --> 00:12:54,347 pain-guzzling sickos, 402 00:12:54,481 --> 00:12:56,786 there's only one way forward... 403 00:12:56,786 --> 00:12:59,926 and that's by going right back into hell, 404 00:12:59,926 --> 00:13:02,932 the only forge hot enough to reshape us. 405 00:13:02,932 --> 00:13:04,668 Damn dude. That's no joke. 406 00:13:04,668 --> 00:13:06,305 So, you tell me. 407 00:13:06,673 --> 00:13:09,344 What kind of man are you, Eagle Eye? 408 00:13:09,344 --> 00:13:11,048 Uh...I'm gonna go with the second one. 409 00:13:11,048 --> 00:13:12,685 That sounded like the cool one. 410 00:13:12,685 --> 00:13:14,121 That's what I thought. 411 00:13:14,421 --> 00:13:15,356 What's this? 412 00:13:15,423 --> 00:13:16,560 - An address. 413 00:13:16,560 --> 00:13:19,064 Tomorrow night. 9pm. 414 00:13:19,666 --> 00:13:21,870 So the rainbow-cano's in Nevada? 415 00:13:21,870 --> 00:13:24,074 Are you sure you 're not thinking of Las Vegas? 416 00:13:24,074 --> 00:13:26,478 Nah. This definitely ain't Vegas. 417 00:13:27,147 --> 00:13:28,216 Woah! 418 00:13:28,216 --> 00:13:30,320 Space gate? Seal Team X operator code 419 00:13:30,386 --> 00:13:32,658 alpha two niner requesting permission to enter. 420 00:13:32,658 --> 00:13:34,194 Uh. Permission granted. 421 00:13:34,194 --> 00:13:35,831 Alright hold on to your helmet. 422 00:13:35,831 --> 00:13:37,200 It's about to get weird. 423 00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:39,037 Oh my god oh my god oh my god. 424 00:13:39,905 --> 00:13:42,276 [dramatic music] 425 00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:45,349 Oh my god! 426 00:13:45,851 --> 00:13:47,421 Are we dead? 427 00:13:47,421 --> 00:13:48,222 Nah, man. 428 00:13:48,323 --> 00:13:50,160 You just traveled through a wormhole. 429 00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:51,729 Holy crap. 430 00:13:51,963 --> 00:13:54,100 [dramatic music] 431 00:13:54,535 --> 00:13:56,439 You see that building at your three o'clock? 432 00:13:56,439 --> 00:13:57,675 That's the Wizard school. 433 00:13:57,675 --> 00:14:00,815 Woah! That's a real wizard student! 434 00:14:00,815 --> 00:14:02,251 So, believe me now? 435 00:14:02,251 --> 00:14:04,689 Oh yes! I am sorry I ever doubted you! 436 00:14:04,689 --> 00:14:05,991 Well, good. 437 00:14:05,991 --> 00:14:07,260 We should probably head back though 438 00:14:07,260 --> 00:14:09,364 before the wizzies alert the Shmagegglebops. 439 00:14:09,364 --> 00:14:11,268 You mean those little guys right there? 440 00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:12,270 Wait what? 441 00:14:12,270 --> 00:14:13,707 Oh crap. 442 00:14:13,707 --> 00:14:15,243 Time to go. Brace yourself. 443 00:14:15,309 --> 00:14:17,380 Wait what's the matter? They're adorable. 444 00:14:17,447 --> 00:14:19,084 No. They're hostile. 445 00:14:19,752 --> 00:14:21,222 Missile! Incoming! [boom] 446 00:14:21,255 --> 00:14:22,892 Oh damnit, 447 00:14:22,892 --> 00:14:24,194 brace for impact! We're going down! 448 00:14:24,194 --> 00:14:25,964 Oh my god! Woah woah woah woah! 449 00:14:30,975 --> 00:14:32,978 Well, look who showed up. 450 00:14:33,045 --> 00:14:35,116 Yo, nice warehouse, dude, classic. 451 00:14:35,116 --> 00:14:37,855 Eagle Eye, meet "The Expandables." 452 00:14:37,855 --> 00:14:40,661 These guys are all ex-special forces, like you. 453 00:14:40,661 --> 00:14:43,633 Live on beer, gear, and kickin' ass. 454 00:14:43,633 --> 00:14:45,035 Damn these guys are no joke. 455 00:14:45,035 --> 00:14:47,240 Oh. You ain't seen nothing yet. 456 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:48,877 Wait til you meet the new guy. 457 00:14:48,877 --> 00:14:50,747 Goes by the name "Braindead." 458 00:14:50,747 --> 00:14:53,252 Psycho graduated BUDS in four days, 459 00:14:53,252 --> 00:14:55,389 and never once stopped smiling. 460 00:14:56,058 --> 00:14:58,362 Ah. Here he is now. 461 00:14:59,331 --> 00:14:59,566 Hank? 462 00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:00,366 Oh hey Mark! 463 00:15:00,668 --> 00:15:02,672 You missed Hell Week. It was super fun. 464 00:15:02,672 --> 00:15:04,909 We played in the water. We ran around on the beach. 465 00:15:04,909 --> 00:15:06,713 And get this, no bed time! 466 00:15:06,780 --> 00:15:07,781 - Ride's here. 467 00:15:07,781 --> 00:15:08,650 Where we headed? 468 00:15:08,650 --> 00:15:09,919 Rescue Mission. 469 00:15:09,919 --> 00:15:11,522 Abracadabrastan. 470 00:15:11,522 --> 00:15:13,793 Yoooo. That guy! 471 00:15:13,793 --> 00:15:15,329 Ooh, wait 'til this dude sees 472 00:15:15,329 --> 00:15:18,235 who's rescuing his ass. This is gonna be classic! 473 00:15:19,839 --> 00:15:20,975 Please don't kill me! 474 00:15:20,975 --> 00:15:22,143 [growling] 475 00:15:22,210 --> 00:15:24,782 Calm yourself. We are a peaceful people. 476 00:15:24,916 --> 00:15:26,653 Don't trust anything he says. 477 00:15:26,653 --> 00:15:27,555 [bang] 478 00:15:28,356 --> 00:15:30,961 Well, if you're so peaceful, why did he just hit my friend? 479 00:15:31,094 --> 00:15:33,332 We only strike those who attack us first. 480 00:15:33,332 --> 00:15:36,138 But aren't you guys like terrorists or something. 481 00:15:36,138 --> 00:15:37,306 To the oppressor, 482 00:15:37,306 --> 00:15:39,444 anyone who resists is a terrorist. 483 00:15:39,444 --> 00:15:42,518 We are merely just fighting to preserve our way of life. 484 00:15:42,819 --> 00:15:44,321 I worry that soon our culture 485 00:15:44,321 --> 00:15:46,058 and rich traditions will be no more. 486 00:15:46,125 --> 00:15:49,064 Our history wiped away. If we lose this fight, 487 00:15:49,064 --> 00:15:50,700 who will tell our story? 488 00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:51,769 Share our truth. 489 00:15:51,836 --> 00:15:54,207 Share your truth? Well, guess what?! 490 00:15:54,708 --> 00:15:55,844 I'm a writer. 491 00:15:56,144 --> 00:15:58,148 You know, I sensed that. 492 00:16:00,955 --> 00:16:01,756 Listen up, 493 00:16:01,857 --> 00:16:04,395 we're headed to a highly secured compound. 494 00:16:04,395 --> 00:16:07,333 Place is crawling with hostile extremists. 495 00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:10,105 This could get messy. Let's gear up, boys. 496 00:16:10,105 --> 00:16:12,043 Oooh. Love me a bit of messy. 497 00:16:12,110 --> 00:16:13,813 Hey Eagle Eye, where's your kit? 498 00:16:13,813 --> 00:16:15,049 Oh. Was I supposed to bring my own? 499 00:16:15,249 --> 00:16:17,053 Wasn't on the little note you gave me at the bar there. 500 00:16:17,053 --> 00:16:18,255 Take this. 501 00:16:18,690 --> 00:16:19,358 Oh hell yeah. 502 00:16:19,358 --> 00:16:20,594 This is just like Call of Duty. 503 00:16:20,594 --> 00:16:23,800 Yo where's the thing that like cocks the... 504 00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,002 I don't know about this wanker. 505 00:16:25,002 --> 00:16:25,804 - I looked this dude up. 506 00:16:25,971 --> 00:16:28,308 And there's no trace of any military record. 507 00:16:28,308 --> 00:16:30,514 I'm telling you, he's legit. 508 00:16:30,514 --> 00:16:31,782 [gun fire] 509 00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:34,555 Whoops! Sorry about that. Somehow popped the safety off. 510 00:16:34,555 --> 00:16:36,759 Yo can I get another gun? I think this one's a lemon. 511 00:16:38,495 --> 00:16:40,399 [dramatic music] 512 00:16:43,974 --> 00:16:45,109 [smack] 513 00:16:45,476 --> 00:16:46,478 We're clear. 514 00:16:49,217 --> 00:16:50,019 Okay boys. [beep] 515 00:16:50,086 --> 00:16:52,658 Sync you're watches. We move in two. 516 00:16:52,658 --> 00:16:55,496 So Mark, you excited for your first combat mission? 517 00:16:55,496 --> 00:16:56,532 Wait what? 518 00:16:56,532 --> 00:16:58,603 Yeah. Mark had some problems making his bed 519 00:16:58,603 --> 00:17:00,172 at boot camp so he quit, 520 00:17:00,172 --> 00:17:02,109 but he's real good at Call of Duty. 521 00:17:02,109 --> 00:17:04,147 He's been telling porky pies. 522 00:17:04,147 --> 00:17:05,283 Seal Team X? 523 00:17:05,584 --> 00:17:08,155 Man, this dude couldn't even make it through basic basic. 524 00:17:08,155 --> 00:17:09,592 -Give me one good reason -Yo, chill. 525 00:17:09,592 --> 00:17:11,161 why I shouldn't split your numpty noggin. 526 00:17:11,161 --> 00:17:14,033 Because right now, we need every man we've got. 527 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:14,735 Yeah, you know 528 00:17:14,969 --> 00:17:16,371 maybe I didn't make it through bootcamp, 529 00:17:16,371 --> 00:17:17,775 but that's just because I'm not some 530 00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:19,444 mindless conformist soldier. 531 00:17:19,444 --> 00:17:21,616 I am a warrior in an army of one. 532 00:17:21,616 --> 00:17:24,187 And believe me, when a poop hits the fan, 533 00:17:24,187 --> 00:17:26,727 it's Eagle Eye you want up there in that sniper's nest, 534 00:17:26,727 --> 00:17:27,895 watching your backs. 535 00:17:27,895 --> 00:17:29,899 Oh you'll be watching our backs, 536 00:17:29,899 --> 00:17:31,401 just not as a sniper. 537 00:17:31,401 --> 00:17:32,470 Yo! Hey! 538 00:17:32,538 --> 00:17:33,707 You take this. 539 00:17:33,874 --> 00:17:37,581 Ooh. A detonator? Hell, yeah. Let's blow some doors, dude. 540 00:17:37,581 --> 00:17:40,386 It's a walkie-talkie. You're on lookout. 541 00:17:40,386 --> 00:17:42,223 You stay here and radio in 542 00:17:42,223 --> 00:17:44,596 if you see any of these blue bastards enter the building. 543 00:17:44,596 --> 00:17:45,263 Oh come on, really? 544 00:17:45,798 --> 00:17:47,835 Just because I didn't make one stupid bed in boot camp? 545 00:17:47,835 --> 00:17:49,103 It ain't about the bed. 546 00:17:49,103 --> 00:17:52,176 It's about the details. It's about discipline. 547 00:17:52,176 --> 00:17:53,913 It's about you showing your teammates 548 00:17:53,913 --> 00:17:57,119 that you're willing to do the little things that in war, 549 00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:59,625 mean the difference between life and death. 550 00:17:59,625 --> 00:18:02,363 I get that you wanna spit lead and split heads, 551 00:18:02,363 --> 00:18:04,668 but war ain't about what you want to do, 552 00:18:04,668 --> 00:18:07,307 it's about what your team needs you to do, 553 00:18:07,307 --> 00:18:10,079 and right now, we need you on lookout. 554 00:18:10,079 --> 00:18:13,586 So, can we count on you, brother? 555 00:18:13,586 --> 00:18:14,822 Sir, yes, sir. 556 00:18:14,822 --> 00:18:15,590 - Good. 557 00:18:15,691 --> 00:18:17,159 Let's roll, boys. 558 00:18:22,270 --> 00:18:25,544 Your way of life seems so...enlightened. 559 00:18:25,544 --> 00:18:27,848 And so it remained until the portal opened 560 00:18:27,848 --> 00:18:28,716 and your people entered 561 00:18:28,917 --> 00:18:31,590 with your large guns and your loud flying machines. 562 00:18:31,590 --> 00:18:34,227 They told us it was a peace-keeping mission, 563 00:18:34,227 --> 00:18:37,233 but soon we learned why they were really here. 564 00:18:37,233 --> 00:18:38,402 What!? Why? 565 00:18:38,637 --> 00:18:41,877 For our natural resources. To steal our ancient magic. 566 00:18:41,877 --> 00:18:42,812 Oh, give me a break. 567 00:18:42,878 --> 00:18:43,547 [smack] 568 00:18:43,947 --> 00:18:46,653 I'm so sorry for what we've done to your people. 569 00:18:46,653 --> 00:18:48,489 Why didn't you tell me the truth, Jack? 570 00:18:48,489 --> 00:18:50,928 I did. Everything I told you was true. 571 00:18:50,928 --> 00:18:52,430 These aren't the good guys, David. 572 00:18:52,496 --> 00:18:54,167 -They're genocidal maniacs. -Help meeee. 573 00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:56,639 You know what, Jack? You can find another writer 574 00:18:56,639 --> 00:18:59,143 to spread your jingoistic propaganda. 575 00:18:59,143 --> 00:19:01,315 I promise to share the real story-- 576 00:19:01,315 --> 00:19:03,218 the Schmagegglebop story. 577 00:19:03,218 --> 00:19:06,458 Oh thanks, David. I knew not all humans were bad. 578 00:19:06,458 --> 00:19:10,032 So what was it exactly that the military was after? 579 00:19:10,032 --> 00:19:10,734 Tell me. 580 00:19:10,734 --> 00:19:11,702 The life stones. 581 00:19:11,702 --> 00:19:14,407 Harvested from deep inside the rainbow-cano, 582 00:19:14,407 --> 00:19:16,211 these crystals grant their wearer 583 00:19:16,211 --> 00:19:18,148 the power of invincibility. 584 00:19:18,148 --> 00:19:19,852 Invincibility? 585 00:19:19,919 --> 00:19:22,290 Mhm, anyone wearing this crystal 586 00:19:22,290 --> 00:19:23,492 cannot be harmed. 587 00:19:23,492 --> 00:19:24,595 [shots] 588 00:19:24,895 --> 00:19:26,030 [clink] 589 00:19:26,164 --> 00:19:28,168 Got em, we gotta go. 590 00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:30,707 Oh my god. What did you do?! 591 00:19:30,707 --> 00:19:31,876 Oh, hey David! 592 00:19:32,511 --> 00:19:33,513 Hank? 593 00:19:34,313 --> 00:19:36,686 But I thought he just said... 594 00:19:36,686 --> 00:19:37,253 Yeah. 595 00:19:37,588 --> 00:19:39,391 Like I told you, they're full of crap. 596 00:19:39,625 --> 00:19:40,426 [thud]! 597 00:19:40,493 --> 00:19:42,196 There you go, Dilly-bros. 598 00:19:42,196 --> 00:19:42,998 You're free to go. 599 00:19:43,064 --> 00:19:44,300 [whimpering] 600 00:19:44,935 --> 00:19:48,242 - It ain't about the bed, it's about the discipline, 601 00:19:48,309 --> 00:19:49,645 - the details... 602 00:19:49,945 --> 00:19:51,816 Yo you got this, soldier... 603 00:19:54,454 --> 00:19:56,592 [Radio] It's an ambush! Take cover! 604 00:19:57,193 --> 00:20:03,506 [battle in background] 605 00:20:06,546 --> 00:20:07,046 Hey Mark. 606 00:20:07,113 --> 00:20:08,482 - Yo Hank. Just in time. 607 00:20:08,717 --> 00:20:11,421 Pretzel Boy? Well I'll be damned. 608 00:20:11,789 --> 00:20:12,992 - So much blood. 609 00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:14,796 So much death. 610 00:20:14,796 --> 00:20:16,364 - We gotta go, now. 611 00:20:16,431 --> 00:20:17,166 Woah, woah, woah. Hold on. 612 00:20:17,333 --> 00:20:19,671 You gotta check it out. Look at the bed. 613 00:20:21,676 --> 00:20:22,811 Die! 614 00:20:22,811 --> 00:20:23,880 Mark, watch out! 615 00:20:25,182 --> 00:20:27,453 Argh! 616 00:20:29,190 --> 00:20:29,925 Damn. 617 00:20:30,125 --> 00:20:31,996 That's the tightest bed I've ever seen. 618 00:20:34,802 --> 00:20:36,237 Yo I nailed it, right? 619 00:20:40,981 --> 00:20:42,350 We lost everyone. 620 00:20:42,350 --> 00:20:43,653 - Yeah, it's a shame, 621 00:20:43,653 --> 00:20:45,724 but listen, hey, if you want some flags folded... 622 00:20:45,958 --> 00:20:46,859 I'm your guy. 623 00:20:47,861 --> 00:20:48,663 Hey, uh 624 00:20:48,963 --> 00:20:52,103 sorry I doubted you but if you want to meet tomorrow 625 00:20:52,103 --> 00:20:53,974 for a little writing sesh you know... 626 00:20:53,974 --> 00:20:54,842 I'm down. 627 00:20:55,276 --> 00:20:56,745 I'm good. 628 00:21:00,152 --> 00:21:01,989 Holy moly, Mark... 629 00:21:02,089 --> 00:21:04,394 I'm impressed. So you okay now? 630 00:21:04,528 --> 00:21:06,800 I'm more than okay. I'm proud. 631 00:21:07,100 --> 00:21:08,937 Proud to serve my beautiful wife. 632 00:21:08,937 --> 00:21:10,005 Hoorah, love you babe! 633 00:21:10,005 --> 00:21:11,509 Oh wow. Okay. 634 00:21:11,509 --> 00:21:13,513 Well soldier, for your next mission, 635 00:21:13,513 --> 00:21:15,382 I need you to empty the dishwasher. 636 00:21:15,382 --> 00:21:17,587 [kiss] Let's not get crazy, okay. 637 00:21:22,263 --> 00:21:25,904 Blue on Blue, a navy seal in Abracadabrastan. 638 00:21:25,904 --> 00:21:27,473 Walter Isaacson? 639 00:21:27,641 --> 00:21:28,275 Ah! 640 00:21:28,275 --> 00:21:29,845 [crash] 44106

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