Original subtitles

(TurboScribe.ai tarafından transkribe edilmiştir. Bu mesajı kaldırmak için Sınırsıza Yükselt.) Hey, what's up, babe?

Hey.

Did you get your job?

I did, yeah.

Yeah?

Mm-hmm.

Congratulations.

Look what I got you.

One second.

What do you mean one second?

You don't like it?

I'm finishing something up.

Hold on one second.

I'm really happy you got your job.

OK.

That way you don't have to sit around

the house all day anymore.

Did you really just interrupt me for this?

You don't like this?

Are you serious?

What do you mean?

Really?

OK.

Thanks.

Jesus.

You're brutal.

I'm just busy, and I feel like-

So tell me a little bit about it.

I don't know.

It's cool.

I have fun.

I get the work done, and I get

to go home.

Yeah.

I made a couple friends, or acquaintances.

You got a job in the HR department,

or what?

I do a bunch of desk work, but

it's not HR.

It's more complicated than that.

You probably wouldn't understand.

I wouldn't understand?

Yeah, I don't think you would.

I don't think you understand.

No.

I probably don't.

Well, tell me a little bit more.

Well, there's this guy that I have to

eat lunch with, and he's so annoying.

And that's probably the worst part of the

job, is just having to pretend to like

people.

But I really like it, so I just

put on my customer service acts.

Well, you're not excited?

No, I'm excited.

Like, I love it.

I got you a bouquet of flowers.

You should be proud.

I knew you would be excited about your

job.

Thanks.

Yeah, that was so sweet of you.

Oh, a little massage.

I'm doing something right now.

This is so important.

It's time sensitive.

You don't like massages?

No, I do, I guess.

I mean ...

God, why are you so mean?

I'm not mean.

I'm just busy, and I feel like you're

always ...

Like, I've worked so hard to get this

position, and now I'm trying to actually do

the work.

And I just feel like, over time, I

feel like I'm not doing it right.

I don't know.

I feel like I don't know about that.

So, who got you this job?

I got me this job.

No, I got you this job.

No, you didn't get me this ...

How did you get me the job?

Well, we went to that barbecue, and Karen

was there, and I told her ...

I sold myself for the job.

Like, I did that for me.

Like, you might have, like, introduced us, but,

like, really, it's about me.

Oh, get out of town on a greyhound.

You are ridiculous.

You really won't give up, will you?

Uh-huh.

For real, though, I have stuff to do.

You're not doing nothing.

Oh, my God.

Until you get to work.

There's actually, like, a lot of stuff that

I have to do, like, while I'm at

home, too.

That's why they pay me extra.

Like, that's the best part about it, is

if I'm doing stuff at home, then, you

know, I'm getting paid more.

So, I can work here, and I can

work, you know ...

And you can get a job.

You can take me shopping.

Oh, yeah.

Okay, you take me shopping.

How about that?

You can take me shopping.

That would be awesome.

We'll see about that.

Come on.

Maybe if you're good, and maybe if you,

like, buy me real flowers instead of whatever

the fuck that was.

Come on, man.

You don't like your flowers.

No, I maybe ...

You put them right there.

Maybe you should have them.

You put them right there in between those

perfect tits of yours.

Yeah.

That's the only thing that could make it

look good.

I know.

These are, like, crunchy.

Ready to eat.

I found those at a very expensive store,

and I had them custom-made.

Which store was that?

So, I know how to, like, when to

avoid it, you know.

Avoid it?

Yeah.

Why are you so mean?

I'm not.

I'm just, like, I have a lot on

my plate right now, you know?

Like, this means so much to me.

You don't understand how much this means to

me.

I know how much it means to you.

That's why I bought you flowers.

Those beautiful bouquet.

They're so gorgeous.

I know.

Like, sorry, I didn't appreciate them before.

Well, you know.

See, now you're talking.

I think you're talking, and I'm trying to

work.

I have, like, seven emails that I have

to get through.

Like, and, you know, maybe that's it, but

I don't know.

Catherine is supposed to send me over some

stuff.

It might be in a couple hours.

It could be tonight.

I might actually have a long night ahead

of me.

So.

A long night?

Yeah.

I don't think so.

Work doesn't stop.

Okay.

Is this good for you?

While I do my emails?

That's what you wanted?

It's really hard to do this one-handed.

Yeah, so, uh, when do you start?

Huh?

When do you start?

When do I start what?

Your new job, crazy.

I'm, I'm working right now.

Like, what do you mean, when do I

start?

You're not working.

You're not working.

You're just gossiping with all the Karens at

the office.

I'm not gossiping, and there's only one Karen.

Like, please, get a grip.

Okay.

Is this really, like, do we have to

do this right now?

Like, we can do this, like, anytime.

You're, like, this is the most prime time

for me to be working.

Like, it's daytime.

Like, can't, what do you, what do you,

don't you have something to do?

Yes!

Okay, yes.

I'm so good at this already, like, you

have no idea.

I knew you were gonna kick ass.

Mm-hmm.

I knew.

Yeah, so, anyway.

Come on.

Shut up.

Shut up?

You shut up.

Like, you think that you can bring me

these shitty flowers, and I'll just stop working?

Because you want to have a little fun?

Like, we can do this whenever.

Like, what's so important about right now?

Anyway, I'm really focused right now.

This is, like, are you done?

Are you good?

Did you finish?

What?

What are you laughing about?

Oh, it's just, somebody emailed me something.

How do you?

Oh, shit.

I have to take this.

Really?

Right now?

Hello?

Yes, this is your...

Ah, I lost it.

Damn.

Hey, look who it is.

Hi.

If it isn't the new office worker that

everybody wants in their office.

Aren't you proud of me?

Shit, what do you think?

No, I'm proud of you.

You're out here pimping the world with your

office skills.

I'm proud of you.

I really am.

What are you talking about?

You're already top dog.

Oh, you're so sweet.

What's going on?

Are you still working?

Do you ever stop?

Huh?

Are you still working?

Do you ever stop?

I have a feeling this job is going

to make me go hard all day every

day.

What do you got all this workout outfit

on?

What's going on with this?

I was doing some stretches and stuff between

phone calls.

Well, you should do some stretches with me

sometime.

Yeah, I should.

You could teach me how to stretch.

I know you'd be doing martial arts.

You could teach me how to defend myself,

too.

Because I know you're a ninja.

And I'm not always going to be around

to save you when trouble comes around.

So, maybe I should teach you a few

things.

I like your workout outfit.

It's cute.

Thanks.

I actually think you got me these.

So, how was your first day?

Was it awesome?

It's like cake, man.

You're used to flailing in the water.

You would give it some really good strides,

wouldn't you?

You're so nice.

I'm a very good swimmer, thank you.

I agree.

So, that's what's going on?

Any cute guys in the office?

Oh, I don't even...

I go in there and I'm straight.

Oh, so you're not even going to try

to make me jealous, huh?

You don't care about me anymore.

You don't care about me anymore.

There's a ton of hot women.

Did you blow them all?

All of them.

All of them, the whole office.

They just gathered around me.

You would have been so proud.

Oh, really?

You blew everyone at the office?

Every single one.

All 33 of them.

I think my dick's getting hard.

Over that?

Yeah.

Do you want to come next time?

You can come and you can watch.

I can jerk off in the corner?

Yeah.

And then I get to drop the last

load.

Yeah.

Well, maybe.

If you're good.

Jeez louise, papa jeez.

What about the girls?

Are there some hot girls in the office?

There are, actually.

Did you make out with all of them?

Not yet.

Only seven of them.

So, I've got a bit of a list

to get through.

Were you doing any mergers and acquisitions in

the office?

I don't even know what you do.

You're a little sneaky sneak.

You're probably doing phone calls, sex calling stuff.

What if I was?

What if this whole time it was just

like...

You were paying for all this?

You were paying for all this with sex

calls?

I think I'd be on the phone a

lot more.

I doubt it.

I don't know how much more you can

be on there.

You're on that fucking thing constantly.

You don't have faith in me?

You don't think I can juggle everything?

No.

I juggle a lot of things.

That's true.

You juggled a lot of things the other

day when I gave you flowers.

Yeah, those flowers.

Yeah, that was something.

I was proud of you.

Stop reminding me.

What the hell?

Why are you so mean?

I'm not.

If I got you a bouquet, I would

like, you know, heavily pick out your favorite

color or something.

It was nice.

They were just crusty.

It's okay.

They were crusty?

Everybody messes up sometimes.

What the hell?

We can't be perfect all the time.

I don't understand what crusty means.

They were basically crumbling.

It was like somebody had bought them and

kept them in their room as like a

memory and then they just dried up.

I have good taste with flowers.

You have good taste in a lot of

other areas.

Well, I have to tell you, I've been

bragging to everybody.

I've been very proud of you because you

finally got the job.

But now, I don't know if I could

trust you at work.

You gave me the ideas.

Sounds like you're being promiscuous.

I am.

I kind of like it.

I'm at that age where you can go

cheat on me with the cute boys and

I probably wouldn't even care.

You wouldn't care?

Nope.

You wouldn't care if I fucked everybody in

the office?

Well, I don't know about fucking them, but

you can blow them all.

I can't give up my precious booty for

the cute boys.

What's that?

He said, yours.

Who's else is it?

Oh.

I'm at the office, obviously.

Like all the hot babes.

The babes?

Be consistent.

Do you want me to blow everybody or

no?

You should introduce me to the...

I wanted you to...

Alright, I'll shut up.

I'm being inappropriate.

You're distracting me is what you are doing.

You're trying to...

You're really good at that.

At what?

You're trying to get your ordinance together over

here.

You're trying to coordinate single file rows of

folders in the closet and paperclips and whatnot.

Oh, is that...

Yeah, paperclips.

Yeah, I'm just carrying around a pack of

paper...

I'm going to everybody's desk and giving them

one paperclip.

That's my whole job.

I think you're mean.

You'll probably walk up to people's desk and

go, Yeah, I'm going to need you to

come in on Saturday.

We're going to...

We have a few backup accounts that need

to be sifted through.

And you're like sipping your coffee while you're

saying it.

You're like, yeah, we're going to need you

to come in on Sunday.

I'm sorry, but...

You really clocked me on that one.

How did you know?

Because you're mean.

I'm not mean.

Yeah, you are.

I'm assertive.

There's a difference.

There's a difference.

Well, are you making people come into work

on Saturday and Sundays and keeping them from

their families because you're mean and vindictive?

If I had the authority to, maybe I

would.

That's not very nice.

Well, maybe you are.

Maybe I'm not very nice.

Yeah, you haven't gone to church in a

while either.

It's a little concerning.

When was the last time you've been to

church?

If I step inside of a church, I'll

probably explode into flames.

That's exactly why I can't go to church.

Well, show me some of these workouts, man.

What you got going on, girl?

You getting back into your yoga?

You want to see my very basic workouts?

They're not basic.

I'm pretty sure you look like a ninja.

I'm not.

You have so much faith in me.

I can do...

How stressful this is.

You should get some good stretches in.

You're not getting no jumping jacks up in

this piece?

I'm getting there.

You have to stretch and warm up.

You know about nothing, huh?

A little bit.

Do you know how to do a jumping

jack?

I don't know.

My coach in high school was really mean

to me, so I'm always real nervous to

do exercises.

Well, I can show you.

We can do that together sometime.

I couldn't do that in high school because

my...

You couldn't do this?

No, because my wiener would flop around on

my shorts, and all the girls would laugh.

Be serious for one second.

I can do this with you sometime.

I bet I can multitask with you.

You're going to work while you work?

Yeah.

Jeez Louise.

This is crazy.

But it's working.

I'm just happy you're going to be able

to pay these bills up in this piece.

And I will be able to do that.

How good are you at multitasking?

I'd say pretty good, maybe.

Seriously.

I can't stand you.

Hold on one second.

I'm nearly halfway and she has Louise.

Hold on one second.

You're such a distraction.

God, you're the worst and best distraction ever.

Okay.

I really have to get this done.

I'm going to be late on this.

You're never going to get this done if

you don't let me finish.

I just need five more minutes.

I literally have three lines in this email.

You're distracting me.

Did you hear that?

I think my package is here.

It's right here.

Are you kidding?

No, no, no.

Stay here.

What's wrong?

I just had the most stressful day at

work.

I feel like it's all been so good

and now it's finally collapsing.

No, it's never going to collapse on you.

You're the best.

I feel like I'm declining though.

I feel like I'm not getting as much

recognition as I had before and it's kind

of like...

Nonsense.

You're the best ever.

I'm just saying that because you're my husband.

No, I'm saying that because you're the best.

You're the sexiest, smartest lady in the world.

You're so sweet.

You deserve to get spoiled.

Do I?

Mm-hmm.

It's a little warm in here, don't you

think?

Maybe you should lose some of that clothing.

Maybe you need to deflate a little bit.

Maybe so.

Alright, you got me.

But I still have to do a couple

things.

You can do a couple things.

We can figure it out.

Mm-hmm.

Jeez Louise, you're like hot.

I just got off like an eight-hour

shift.

How could I possibly look hot like this?

What if you say so?

I say so.

I don't believe you.

Do you really think I'm like the best?

I know you're the best, you top dog.

Mm

-hmm.

Fuck.

Do you make me feel like I'm the

best?

Yes, please.

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

Getting some work done?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah?

As much as I can.

I'm supposed to jump on a call.

Just give me a minute.

Yes.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Oh, fuck.

I have to send this out right now.

Right now.

Okay, okay.

Much better.

Yes.

Oh my gosh.

Oh.

Mm-hmm.

Yes, get in there.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Oh

Oh