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(theme music playing)
(Aidan moans)
(Carrie) were back together,
it seemed like nothing had ever happened to break us apart.
(phone rings)
(Carrie over answering machine) Hi, it's me, go ahead.
(Big) I'm back in town.
-Call me, baby. -(line disconnects)
I'm... (clears throat)
-No, no. It's... -No, no, no.
-It's... -Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's...
Yeah.
(Carrie) with a big message.
-Okay, something happened. -Something bad?
Big called while Aidan and I were making love.
-Something bad. -Ah.
-The machine picked up. -What did you do?
Nothing.
We just kept making love.
He could keep going after that?
-Honey, he's a keeper. -Never mind him, how'd you do?
-Fine, I finished. -You did?
I had to.
And I haven't worked that hard at anything since my SATs.
This is awful. Did you talk about it?
No, we just went to sleep.
And when I woke up, Aidan was on the other side of the bed.
Usually he sleeps right next to me, you know, like, right here.
And I just... I get in his little nook.
Maybe he's just sleeping differently.
Maybe, or maybe he'll never forget what happened
and every time the phone rings,
he'll think that it's Big calling to start affair number two.
-(Samantha) Mmm. -That's a big maybe.
I was just hoping that we could just start fresh.
Now I think we're gonna have to talk about it.
What are you gonna do, sit Aidan down and explain about Big?
Unless Hallmark makes a "Sorry I Cheated" card.
No one wants to hear about their lover's past lovers.
What happened was in the past, leave it there.
It's on my answering machine. I
(waitress 1) Here you go. This is yours.
-Thank you. -(waitress 2) Excuse me.
-Can I change the subject? -I'll pay you a million dollars.
I'm thinking about quitting my job.
Did you get an offer from a better gallery?
No, I mean, stopping working altogether.
Really?
Yeah.
I've been driving myself crazy lately just trying to get everything done.
-And Trey suggested that-- -Trey suggested?
Well, he mentioned that maybe I might quit.
And I mean, really, I have just been driving myself crazy.
And for what? The gallery?
What has the gallery ever done for me?
-But you love your job. -I know.
But there's so much more I could do with my life.
Like what?
Well, soon I'll be pregnant, and that'll be huge.
Plus, I'm redecorating the apartment.
And I always wanted to take one of those Indian cooking classes.
And sometimes I'll walk by one of those Color Me Mine pottery places
and I'll see a woman having just a lovely afternoon glazing a bowl.
That'd be a nice change.
And I wanted to volunteer at Trey's hospital.
And help raise money for the new Pediatric AIDS wing.
Well, the cooking and the AIDS stuff is great,
but Color Me Mine, sweetie,
if I was walking by and I saw you in there,
I'd just keep on walking.
Anyway, that's what I'm thinking.
You sure you're not just having a bad work week?
No, that's not it.
I'm quitting, that's what I wanna do, yep.
I'm quitting.
Well, be damn sure before you get off the Ferris wheel
because the women waiting to get on are 22, perky and ruthless.
You seem to have a lot of opinions today.
I'm telling you, just forget it ever happened.
(Carrie) I got to thinking about relationships
and partial lobotomies.
Two seemingly different ideas that might be perfect together,
like chocolate and peanut butter.
Think how much easier it would all be
if there was some swift surgical procedure
to whisk away all the ugly memories and mistakes
and leave only the fun trips and special holidays.
But until that day arrives, what to do?
Rely on the same old needlepoint philosophy
of "forgive and forget"?
And even if a couple can manage the forgiveness,
has any ever really conquered the "forgetness"?
Can you ever really forgive if you can't forget?
To Samantha Jones, some things were unforgivable.
-And taking someone else's cab... -Hey!
...was right at the top of her list.
-I was here first! -Sorry!
(brakes squeal)
I don't think so. Get out.
I'm not getting out.
West 12th and 9th Avenue, please.
I hope you enjoy the ride.
(Carrie)
(moaning)
(sighs)
And in a far less friendly bed uptown,
I was even farther from the nook.
Yet, I still wasn't sure, maybe I was overreacting.
8:10? I gotta get to the gym.
You don't have to go to the gym right now.
-Do you want me to get all soft again? -I liked you all soft.
Mmm. I didn't.
Hey.
Give me a good-morning kiss. Hmm?
You might wanna brush your teeth first.
(Carrie) He wasn't forgiving or forgetting.
-(speed dialing) -And speaking of not forgetting...
(phone rings)
(sighs)
Hello.
You were so judgmental at the coffee shop yesterday.
-Excuse me? -You think I'm one of those women.
What? One of what women?
One of those women we hate, who just works until she gets married.
Charlotte, it's 8:15.
That's not a response.
It's an 8:15-in-the-morning response.
The women's movement is supposed to be about choice.
And if I choose to quit my job, that is my choice.
"The women's movement"? Jesus Christ, I haven't even had coffee yet.
It's my life and my choice.
Okay, Charlotte, this isn't about me. This is your stuff.
Admit it. You're being very judgmental.
I'm dripping all over my bathroom and you're calling me judgmental.
And if you have a problem with quitting your job,
maybe you should take it up with your husband.
See, there it is, "your husband."
There's nothing wrong with having a husband.
Charlotte, I'm hanging up.
(gasps) Don't you dare hang up And stop saying "Charlotte" like that.
I am quitting my job to make my life better
and do something worthwhile, like have a baby and cure AIDS.
Oh, you're gonna cure AIDS? Good for you, Charlotte.
Just don't be too disappointed if all you wind up with
is a pretty ceramic mug with Trey's name on it.
-Take that back! -I'm hanging up.
Don't you dare hang up! I'm interviewing girls to replace me
and I really need you to get behind my choice.
You get behind your choice.
I I choose my choice.
Charlotte, I don't have time for this. I have to go to work.
-Some of us still have to go to work. -I choose my choice! I choose my choice.
(line disconnects)
Ow!
Fuck! Ow!
Jesus!
(Carrie)
some women, like Charlotte, confront it head-on,
while others...
(knocking on door)
Fresh juice?
-Where'd you get that? -I ran down to the Korean.
-Dressed like that? -Mmm-hmm.
It caused quite the stir.
Hey, will you help me patch up, buddy?
I got a big tense meeting with my editor in about an hour.
It's feeling like a two-patch day.
Notice how much better I'm doing this time?
No cheating.
I think I finally kicked that bad habit.
Now I'm practically perfect, don't you think?
Ow... Ow.
Well, that kind of hurt.
What was that?
I was just making sure it was on good and tight.
Well...
-Are you mad at me or something? -Why would I be mad at you?
Excuse me.
About the other night.
What the fuck?
This goddamn milk is bad.
You just fucking let it sit in there?
(sighs)
Look, it's not you. I'm just a little pissed off because of work.
I gotta strip these pieces all weekend, the chemicals are toxic.
-I can't get anybody to watch Pete. -I'll watch Pete.
Come on, dog walking is not your favorite thing to do, Carrie.
Hey.
You love Pete, I love Pete.
That's just the kind of girlfriend I am.
How about I take my tall drink of water out to dinner tonight?
Someplace super-nice, where the milk is fresh.
I was gonna hook up with some buddies over at Steve's bar.
Well, is it a night with the guys, or can girlfriends crash?
You can come, don't come...
Whatever. Do what you like.
No, you go have fun with the guys.
(phone ringing)
-Hello? -(Miranda)
Charlotte called and I was drying my hair.
My whole body is fucked up because of the marathon.
I'm sorry. Can I do something?
I don't know. It hurts to even hold the phone.
Come over.
-Okay, I have a-- -Thanks.
Fuck!
Shit.
Miranda's neck is out. She can't move, and I'm just...
I'm worried that it's too late for me to cancel my meeting.
I'll go check on Miranda for you.
-You would? -Sure.
Thank you.
You are a great, great boyfriend. You know that?
I mean it, you're the best.
Where's her keys?
(Carrie)
Miranda's neck had gone from bad to worse.
(door opening)
(softly) Carrie?
Carrie?
(Aidan) No, it's Aidan. Carrie sent me.
-(footsteps approaching) -No. Ah!
Uh, no, don't come in. I'm naked.
-What? -I...
Oh, Jesus.
Uh, my neck pulled again and this is the only way I felt comfortable.
I'll get up.
Ow!
-Okay, don't get up. I'm coming in. -No! Don't come in. I'm fine.
Ow!
-I can't get up. -Okay, I'm coming in.
Oh, God.
I am mortified.
Just relax, darling, I'm looking the other way.
(clears throat) I'm gonna lift you up.
No, you'll see everything.
Nothing I haven't seen before. Okay.
Hey, nice smell. That's the April Fresh stuff, right?
-Yeah. -Okay.
All right. You ready to be lifted?
-Okay. -Okay, here we go.
(whimpers)
All right, put your...
There you go. All right.
Let's get you up now. On three. One, two, three.
(Miranda squeals)
-Okay. How you doing? -I'm fine.
All right.
(Aidan grunts)
All right. Snug as a bug in a rug.
(Carrie)
It seemed every aspiring gallerina in New York wanted Charlotte's job.
She was determined to find the perfect replacement.
Someone bright, someone smart, someone like Charlotte.
"BA in Art History, minor in Finance." Same as me.
"Career objectives: To own my own gallery."
Oh, my God, that is amazing.
I think I had the same objective on my first résumé.
Did you ever own one?
No. Uh...
I found I loved it here so much that it felt like my gallery.
You've done an amazing job.
It's my favorite space.
I probably shouldn't tell you this with a line of people out there,
-but you're hired. -I am?
-Thank you, thank you, thank you. -Okay. Shh!
-So do you have any questions? -Just one.
Why are you leaving this fantastic job?
Well, I'm married, and we're planning on a baby.
Also,
I'm on the board of the Lenox Hill Pediatric AIDS Foundation.
(Carrie)
She just couldn't bring herself to tell the girl
that her new résumé objective would read:
"Wife, mother, and part-time bowl glazer."
That night, I decided to interrupt guys' night
to give Aidan a quick thank-you-for-helping-Miranda kiss.
(rock music playing over speakers)
You're my hero.
What's new, pussycat?
Not only are you great to me,
but you're great to my friends as well.
Who's a better boyfriend than you?
I'm back. Where were we?
I was up to three peanuts.
Oh, you think you're such hot stuff, huh?
-Oh, yeah. -Uh, peanuts?
Yeah, Shayna here is teaching me how to play jacks with the peanuts,
and I'm at three-sies.
Hi, I'm Carrie.
Oh, Carrie.
-Hi. -I'm sorry. That's, uh... That's Shayna.
-Hi. -Can I get you a drink, or...
No. No, thanks, I'm not staying.
I don't wanna interrupt the night with the guys.
So, where are the guys?
Ah, man, the guys blew me off at the last minute.
So I came down here to hang out with my buddy Steve.
Oh.
And Steve...
I'm sorry.
Where's Steve?
It's kind of slow so Steve went to get a burrito.
Shayna and I are looking out for the joint.
-All right, I'm up. -Yeah?
-Two-sies. -Two-sies!
Look out.
-That was good. -That was very good.
So, Miranda says that you were amazing.
He helped my girlfriend today. He took her to the chiropractor.
-We got us a nice guy, here. -Oh, shucks, ma'am.
So, how was Miranda?
Uh, no work or running for a week
and she has to wear one of those foam collars.
-What do you call four? -Um, four-sies.
Four-sies. Yee-haw!
-Okay. -Okay, well, I'm gonna go.
-What? Yeah? -Yeah.
-Can you excuse us for a second? -Sure.
What is going on?
-What's up? -You tell me.
Okay.
You do your thing.
Listen, I don't have to work tomorrow, so come on over if you want.
I'll come over.
Good luck with four-sies.
-It was nice to meet you, Shayna. -Oh, yeah.
I'll see you later.
-Let's go. -Okay.
All right.
-(Aidan) Watch and learn, young buck. -(Shayna laughing)
(Carrie)
And at about 3:00 a.m., it became very clear
that I was being punished for my big mistake.
(knocking)
That cowl-neck look is on the way out. You heard it here first.
Ow.
How are you, sweetie?
I had to sleep sitting up like the Elephant Man.
I brought you bagels to cheer you up.
Wow, that's so nice of you.
(sighs)
Aidan never came over last night.
He said he would, but he didn't. And I called him this morning.
He said that he thought that "come over" meant today, not last night.
You know what? This is bullshit.
-Yeah, that's what I think. -No, you.
You are bullshit.
You and your bullshit cheer-me-up bagels.
They're just a decoy so you could talk about Aidan.
Look. You didn't even bring cream cheese.
I got the good bagels.
It's bad enough you send your boyfriend to help me when I call you,
but now, the bullshit bagels.
So what are you saying, you don't want one?
If you fell, or something,
I would never send my boyfriend to help you.
And, yes, I know, I don't have a boyfriend.
What's the problem?
Aidan's better in a crisis than I am.
I can't even remember your cream cheese.
He saw me naked.
Your boyfriend saw me naked on the floor, lying on a bathmat.
Did he tell you that?
-No, he's a gentleman. -Well, he did!
All right, I get it, I'm sorry.
I will never send a boyfriend to do my job again.
Okay.
You want it toasted?
Okay.
If I still even have a boyfriend,
I think he's having an affair with a waitress at Scout.
Just because you cheated on him does not mean he would cheat on you.
-I'm gonna burn your bagel. -Don't.
Well, if he hasn't, it's just a matter of time.
He's not having an affair. Aidan isn't like that. He's a good guy.
Yeah, he's the good guy and I'm the bad guy.
And the bad guy just has to take it, right?
I mean...
You should've seen the way he was acting in front of me.
He's torturing me because of what I did to him, and...
And I deserve it.
I deserve it, right?
I'd shrug, but it hurts.
Got any jelly?
(Brad sighs)
I wish I knew the name of that cabdriver.
I'd send him a bottle of wine or something.
That was really great.
You're a wild man.
Yeah. Hey, um, speaking of wild,
it's getting a little too wild down there.
Might be time for a wax.
See you soon.
It's my week between waxes. I have three errant hairs,
and this asshole thinks I'm George of the Jungle.
That's horrifying.
And you should see the bush on him.
I need a weedwhacker just to find his dick.
Could you please keep it down? We're on the Upper East Side.
Men. We have to run to Helga the hot-waxer every other week,
but them?
How would they like it if we told them to shape their hedge, trim their trunk?
Plant their bulbs?
I'm sorry, we are talking about gardening, aren't we?
And don't get me started on his back hair.
Okay, please. Hey, wait a second, Pete has to go.
-Come here, sweetie. -(Samantha) This is lovely.
Why are you even walking this mongrel?
Because I'm proving to my boyfriend that I am trustworthy and loving.
And kindly, do not take your anger out on Pete.
So watching his dog take a dump
is going to make the memory of Big fade away?
-Couldn't hurt. -Oh, come on. The dog, the waitress.
I don't know that anything happened with the waitress.
How much longer are you gonna punish yourself?
Until I'm back in the nook.
You may never get back in the nook.
Don't say that.
I know it's true, but don't say it.
(Pete whines)
Well, I'm not a dog expert, but is that normal?
Oh, no! Oh, he's got the runs.
-Oh, poor Pete. -Poor me.
-Ew. -Oh! Oh, God.
-Ugh. -Oh, he must be sick or something.
Honey, I love you, but this is not my scene. I'll call you.
Wait... You're not gonna just leave me here?
-Bye-bye! -Oh!
Wait. Pete, no, no, no. Sweetie. Sweetie.
Don't walk. You're not done yet, honey.
Pick up after your dog.
He's not my dog.
(Carrie) I wondered just how much shit
was I willing to put up with for my mistake.
Wait, wait, wait. Shit!
Poor Pete's poo-poo platter continued for so many blocks
I got worried and decided it was time to take him home.
So I said, "What?"
(Aidan laughs)
-There was a big giant... -Here, your dog got sick, I'm leaving.
-Hey, taxi! -Hey. Hey! Will you hold this?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Carrie. Carrie, stop!
-What are you doing? -Toxic chemicals?
I'm taking a break.
Oh, and she just happened to be there with coffee?
-I diapered your dog! -Keep your voice down.
What are you doing?
Nothing. It's my friend. We're friends.
Well, why don't you just fuck her? Then we can both be bad.
Nothing happened.
I thought about it.
Do you wanna come in?
I'm too pissed to come in.
I hate that he calls here.
Nothing's happening.
Or will ever happen.
You have to know that, right?
I would never do that to you again.
Never.
I don't want you to see him ever again.
I can't do that.
He's in my life.
It's not the same way you are, but he is.
Aidan, you can't keep punishing me.
And I can't keep punishing me.
I made a mistake...
and I am sorry.
And I know that you can't forget what happened,
but I hope that you can forgive me.
You have to forgive me.
You have to forgive me.
You have to forgive me.
You have to forgive me, Aidan.
You have to forgive me.
You have to forgive me!
You have to forgive me.
(exhales)
You had a lot of nerve telling me to get a wax.
If you were in Aruba, the natives could bead your back.
And it's not just there.
Every time I blow you, I feel like I'm flossing.
(chuckles)
I'm sorry, baby.
Is there anything I can do to make you forgive me?
(trimmer whirring)
(Samantha humming)
(Carrie) and Brad got a lesson he never forgot.
Wow, look how much bigger my dick looks. (laughs)
(Carrie) Charlotte's last day came.
Oh, number seven should go on the north wall.
I think it would be better on the south side.
You're 22, what do you know about life?
I mean, art. I'm sorry, I'm...
I'm just...
I'm freaked out.
I've been working my whole life. This is a big transition.
Well, if it's any consolation, my mother worked all the time.
It would've been nice to have her home more.
(sighs)
Oh, don't forget to set the alarms.
You're not going to finish the day?
I think I'm done.
Good luck.
(giggles)
(Carrie) to pursue her new life objectives:
Be a good mother, cure AIDS,
and prove Miranda wrong.
You'd better move my meetings till the end of the week.
I'm not quite 100%.
Yeah.
Still wearing the brace.
Okay. Bye.
(Carrie) in her life,
Miranda learned the joys of cooking and of not working.
Of course, she'd have to go back eventually,
just to prove Charlotte wrong.
(woman on TV) So I'm gonna stop the machine,
lift it up, and we'll add the flour...
(Carrie)
he and I weren't quite back to where we were.
We might never be there again,
but we were in a new place, a more honest place.
And somehow, over time, I had made my way back into the nook.
(theme music playing)
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