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Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

* Well, after you've gone, I'll still be around *

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

* Well, after you've gone, I'll still be around *

'Maury, listen. I got a kid. I gotta write some business.'

'Why? It's not my fault.'

'You're talking after the close, Dave. You panicked.'

'You quit on lots of sits where there's a deal sitting there.'

' - 'Long list.'

'Crocker, Sergeant Saigon with the shrapnel in his head.'

'The man was a writeable deal.'

'Davey, Jesus. What's with you this morning? You gotta relax.'

You should let me stimulate your third eye point.

It'll energize you.

Put that away, alright? I'm not your guinea pig.

You need to get your license

before we discuss you sticking pins in me.

Needles. Haa Jing Xan!

Still need a license.

How do I look?

- 'Good.' - 'God, I miss her.'

Just-just keep your mind on the day. That's all.

'What?'

'Aw, come on.'

'Hurry!'

Dolly. Dolly, it's Daddy.

Daddy.

Shh.

'Let's go. We're late.'

- I love you. - Me too.

Me too, what?

I love you. What do you think?

'Honk! Do you know what "honk" means?'

- The Korean couple.

She was a nurse. There you gave up.

- Like you don't give a shit. - I give plenty of shit.

I don't get my tuition paid by Monday

'I gotta sit out the whole semester.'

- The Acupuncture University.

University? It's a school.

What the hell you think a university is?

To me, it suggests a big campus

sororities, high jinks, trees, that sort of thing.

Yeah.

Yours is on Reseda in between the T.J. Maxx and a Costco.

Yeah, where's your university, huh?

I don't need one, man. It's all in here.

["Let's Dance" by Robert Shad playing on the stereo]

- Can't take this shit anymore. - Hey, let it play.

This isn't working.

Don't take it personally, man, but I gotta make a living.

You want to go it alone?

You can't do shit without these. Here, take 'em.

No, I don't need your bullshit leads. Keep your fucking leads.

Keep the book too, I don't need that.

All I need is a credit app and a contract.

'I learned this business door-to-door, my friend.'

Cold canvassing. All I need is my shoes and my mouth.

Pull over. Just drop me off, right here.

Good, fine.

What are you doing?

- This is here. - Here means the corner.

You ever drop off a human being on earth?

- 'Okay, great.' '

I'm gonna write some business.

- It's a big world.

'Yeah, don't eat it.'

Asshole.

- Asshole. - You!

Hi, I'm Dave Langer, with Valley Food Service.

If any of your neighbors told you about us

but we're here, and what I'm trying to do

is give away 10 free chickens

with the price of just one of our meat plans.

'Sir, the one monthly amount includes everything.'

Okay, no chicken for you.

Mr. Simmons, hi. Maurice Burns, I'm from Valley Food Service.

Oh, yeah, come on in.

'Where do you live?'

I don't really feel that, Sherman Oaks

but I don't think that has anything--

Here's what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna come to your house

'knock-knock. You wanna buy some of my crap?'

- That's okay.

Sorry for wasting your time. I apologize.

Have a good day, sir. Go fuck yourself.

Why don't you cut your grass?

I'll bet you hate to shop, Mr. Simmons.

Oh, I sure do.

Well, now you won't have to.

Oh, Madden.

See, that's the best NFL coach ever, right there.

He's good in the booth but seven AFC Western Division titles.

- That's the man.

Madden, that's.. How do you know him?

That's my mom.

Uh-huh.

Hi. Can you recognize my "hi"?

'Is this Maurice?'

Yes, yes, this is still Maurice.

So what's my favorite redhead doing tonight?

'I don't know, Maurice. I've never had red hair.'

This is Carol?

'This is Carolyn, and all my hairs are brown.'

Oh, yes. Hi. Jeez, yeah. No, I remember.

Yeah, we went to the movie, right?

We watched it at your place. How are you?

'Do you care? Or we could just hang up the phone right now.'

- If that's what you'd like. - 'I would, yes.'

Then-then let's do that.

Hi, darling. How are you?

Dad, did you forget my birthday?

Of course not. Did you think I would?

I didn't know.

- I never would.

I think I do. You wanna tell me again?

- A swing and a slide. - A swing and a slide.

Yep. Here's Mommy.

Don't disappoint her, Dave.

It's bad of her to think of you as a loser.

She doesn't think that.

She needs you to be solid. Do you have any solid left?

Renee, I'm doing my best.

If you can, just get her something nice.

That would be our top of the line model.

It's 550 bucks.

Wood really necessary in a swinging device?

It's superior for the child.

This particular model is priced way down.

It's the last one we have left.

Probably the last time you'll get it at this low price.

Trying to pull that shit on me?

- Your impending event, Glenn.

Make it big, man.

Grab an issue. Talk about deforestation.

Trees are being chopped down all over the world.

You're not gonna find wood of this caliber

on kids' recreational equipment..

'Hey.'

Hey.

How'd you do?

I got nothing.

Yeah, nothing.

I'm sorry about before.

Nah, forget it. Water, bridge, under.

Under.

Hey, hey, look.

'Look at that.'

- Yeah, cute. Take it easy. - Aha.

'She's too happy for you.'

How is everything?

- I have two ice teas now. - You must be thirsty.

Kristy, do you see what I do

so we can spend some time alone together?

And the dish ran away with the spoon.

It's been so hard being apart like this.

I think we should see each other more. That's what I think.

I think you're nuts.

So, you wanna help me steal a swing set?

Not before we try these.

Alright. It's all there in the application.

You'll get a free delivery and a freezer and 10 filets.

Take it.

I don't understand why we need all this meat.

I'm sorry. We went over this.

Andy likes filets. You likes the rib eye.

'This whole order is customized for the Wilson family.'

Sally's been on this health kick lately.

- It's not a kick. - Program, honey.

She's been eating healthy and she wants to keep it up.

Eating healthy means meat in the middle.

You make the meat the hub.

Let your other foods fill in around it.

We were made to eat meat, originally by God.

Our system works better when we give it

what it was meant to have.

Don't you think it's healthy to have

what God meant for you to have?

- I guess so. - I guess so, too.

Take it for Sally's health.

Honey?

'Okay, great. Good.'

'We'll back with the freezer first thing in the morning.'

* Oh, yeah

* Everything

* Everything Everything gonna be alright *

I think we turned it around yesterday.

I think we did.

* Oh, yeah *

- 'Victory smells good.' - 'Tastes good.'

- Oh, no. I'm sorry.

You can't bring that in here. Please move your truck.

What? No, we're not taking delivery of this.

'No, no. You taste victory. You smell success.'

- Shit. Fuck. - No. No! Come on.

We should've stayed for tea when she asked.

No fucking way. Hold it.

Ah!

Yeah. Yeah. We-we're okay.

Just wait right there. We're gonna be okay.

Andy, Sally, you'll love it.

It's a beaut.

'We changed our mind.'

No, no. It's okay. We see this all the time.

Absolutely, you know it's-it's-it's common

to feel a little overwhelmed on a new purchase.

Sure. Sure.

Change is good! You know that.

Knock back if you think change is good.

Come on, Andy, Sally. We had an agreement.

You going through leads like water.

It's time to give it a break. You boys need a rest.

What are you, a psychiatrist?

You could use some time in Ensenada.

Both of you probably, apart.

- No, it means, we're fired.

Is that the expression, "Go to Ensenada?"

It's a slump, Dick. Okay, everybody goes through' em.

Dick can't acknowledge a simple string of bad luck?

The word doesn't exist.

If you believe in luck, you're a schmuck.

'You used to kill, Maury. What happened?'

- Things change, Dick. - 'Forget it, Maury.'

Dick, it's me, alright.

'Just tell my kid, I loved her. I'm gonna find a ledge.'

Don't be so fucking dramatic. I'll give you something.

These are the best I have today.

'There's a deal in here. God damn it, maybe two.'

'If you don't write any business with these'

then we gotta say goodbye.

'I need closers who close.'

Now come on, you guys are pros.

Don't press for Christ's sake.

'Go and have a good breakfast, have an extra Danish.'

Then go write some business.

Stay cool, boys. It's gonna be a scorcher.

* Early in the morning I can't do right *

* Had little fight with my baby last night *

* And it's early in the morning *

* Don't you know it's early in the morning? *

* Early in the morning

* I ain't got nothing new. Nothing but the blue *

He could be here. Perfect prospect.

A leaf from God. I'm ready for him.

See, when I think of that guy

something happens, something kicks in.

'I know. I know. You get very excited.'

- Oh. - Nice, very nice.

- Very good. - Thank you.

- Bye. - Bye.

'She's a very fast learner.'

I-I started teaching her about three years ago.

Now she gives me lessons. But not piano.

I'll tell you something with our program

'you'll save a sizable portion of your music teacher salary.'

It's the right thing to do, Leon. Take it.

It's very attractive I must say. Let me think about it.

- Go ahead. - He wants to think about it.

Leon.

'Beethoven, do you think he thought to himself.'

"Hey, should I write "

'No, he wrote it.'

'And thank God he did.'

It's the right thing to do, Leon. Take it.

If I'm not gonna be a great composer

at least I can eat well.

Next year, I'm gonna be out of here.

Even if you and that pretty lady decide to tie the knot.

'We just make a few adjustments.'

You too. We talk about that a lot.

I should marry her, shouldn't I?

When I look at her, I can tell she just wants to be your wife.

Fellas, it's a sweet deal

but I think I should... run it by Karen.

'When she moves in here my fridge will be her fridge.'

'So, why don't you just leave your card and we'll discuss it.'

Take it.

Hold the pen! You don't talk.

- Yeah. The next move is his. - He's only got one move.

- He takes the pen. - Takes the pen. I know.

Why didn't you give me a signal or something?

I don't care. Give me the finger.

- I shushed you. I-- - You can't shush me.

I'm locked in, I'm not gonna hear that.

Touch my leg. That's all.

Jesus, Davey. I gotta finish this semester.

Then six months of clinical. I'm a doctor.

I-I know.

My father would have known that then, wow.

He'd still be dead but with a different expression

on his face.

He'll know.

'I don't think he ever thought of a me as a man.'

You know, my father.

'I talk to him and I tell him, "Be patient."'

'It's not over for me.'

If it's not over for me

then in a strange way it's not over for him.

I'm out there. I'm looking.

What are you looking for?

A sign, something. That God sees me.

Oh, shit.

Where's the other lead card?

You have them.

What, Davey?

- 'Stop the car.'

Find the card! Find the card that you lost!

Look at all these wrappers! Told you not to eat this shit.

Oh, yeah, just me! I'm the only one who eats.

- It's all you. - Oh, bullshit.

We pull up to drive through I order you just stare, right?

- It's not a religion with me. - You fucking eat!

It's not like a carnival ride with me, alright.

Give me the last card, before you lose this one.

- I'm sorry. - This is it. This is it, Davey.

- This is the last one. - I'm sorry, alright.

This is the last card. We gotta focus now.

- Alright, take it in. - Alright.

Feels good. We're good. Are you good?

I'm good.

You son of a bitch! I'll punch your asshole!

I'm good.

I'll punch your asshole?

Got confused. I wanted to say, "I'll punch you"

and "You're an asshole."

Yeah.

We'll figure it out on the way.

* My life, my life, my life, my life *

* In the sunshine

* Everybody loves the sunshine *

* Sunshine

* Everybody loves the sunshine *

* Sunshine

* Folks get down in the sunshine *

God, please. Don't make me beg.

'Just a minute.'

[music playing in ice cream truck]

Hi.

Hi, I'm Maurice Burns.

I'm from Valley food service and this is Dave Langer.

He works for me.

Yes, you're here. Come in.

'Here.'

I'm on the telephone. A friend of mine is having boy problems.

But, sit, I'll be right back.

Salesmen.

Holy shit.

Nice twigs. Clean.

God in heaven.

Put your dick in a bag and have the bag buried.

This is a deal. I smell it.

And as a point of information, it smells very good.

I'm ready. I'm ready.

- Be ready, man. - I'm right here.

Shut the fuck up. She can hear you.

- Let's sell some meat. - Shut up.

- I've seen beautiful women. - Yeah.

- You'd need a pretty big bag. - Shut the fuck up!

So, we can cut your steaks a half-inch thick

three-quarters of an inch or a full. Which do you prefer?

I like variety.

I'm gonna start your package

with a 10 pound box of free filets.

The best. It's just our way of saying that you're special.

- Well, just the one in the--

It's okay. We can put a unit in the house.

Oh, really? What's a unit?

Excuse me.

Okay. This is going good.

Yeah. Smooth. Just don't rush.

You know where to rush to, okay? I'm just saying I'm fine.

Suzy is freaking.

I mean, she-she can't find the goldfish

and something is flipping in her stomach.

I'm sorry, but I told her that I have a doctor over

that he's a friend and that's you. Please come with me.

Tell her, that's okay. That it's nothing.

Come. Come.

Suzy, sweetie, here he is.

Uh, hello. Hi, this is, uh..

...Dr. Kissinger.

Can I help you? Hmm. Yeah.

Well, you know what, I-I see a lot of that.

And that's nothing to worry about.

'The rule we go by in medicine is'

if it's a critter of any heft, you gotta go in after it.

but if it's a fish, you just let it float downstream.

'Uh, you can, if you'd like.'

Hey, everything okay?

Come with me.

Hi. Could you please turn that big heavy bottle over, Maurice?

- 'While, I have you.' - You got it.

See, my nails make everything impossible.

You like bubbles?

I adore them.

Huh?

That was so easy for you. You're so strong.

You workout?

No, I'm a strong guy. I don't know, why?

It's good genes.

Well, my mother was a strong woman.

Mine too.

You know, we should be talking business here.

Yeah. Yeah. Dave said no flirting.

But I don't know. I think, he meant just me.

I mean, you can flirt all you want. Go ahead.

See if you can get my attention.

Come, show me your meat.

Your partner seems to think it's the best in the nation.

It's true.

When you're all better you'll go shopping for a new fish.

Okay? Good.

Now, just put your head down and be calm and resty rest.

Okay. Bye-bye.

So, of course to pass along the savings to you

we deliver to you in quantity.

- You buy whole side of beef--

Myself personally?

Could you do me a favor and just check it without the slide?

Yeah. Uh-huh. The same model without.

Could you hold on one second please?

Hello, Suzanne.

I thought you were supposed to be resting.

Yes, I'm right here. I'm still here.

Okay, what I want you do is calm down, okay?

Close your eyes and remember there are so many things

to dream about.

And example would be, anything you like.

You like melon.

I need your initial there. That's alright.

Okay.

I-I don't think that's a good idea.

You gotta calm-calm down, Suzanne. Suzanne!

- Ah!

You gotta talk to her. I think she's trying to kill herself.

- I'm sorry.

I'm really not a doctor. Uh, you just gotta talk to her.

She was about to sign the fucking check.

What am I supposed to do? I'm not a doctor.

Oh, Jesus! Oh shit!

Suzanna, no, no. I'll be there. Don't lock the door.

Suzy, no!

Suzy cut her wrist.

She says, it's not for attention but I know, it is.

I mean, I have to go and help her.

- We can't.

We should take you. Uh, we'll drive.

Okay, alright, let's go. We'll finish with this later.

- No, no, no. I shouldn't. - He used to race.

Okay. Okay. Let's go.

Close her in the car.

We could finish up the paperwork now if you wanted.

Yeah.

Suzy. She's like a friend that I've had since I moved here.

You know, we've got in trouble so many times together.

She taught me all the bad words in English.

Like you know, like fuck me, and piece of shit.

and "motherfucker" and "asshole."

and "cocksucker" and "blow me."

- That's pretty good. - Yeah.

It's good.

* Little lovely lady

* Strolling slowly

* Towards the sun *

- Suzy! Suzy! - Hey, you guys. False alarm.

Totally false alarm. I'm doing much better.

Oh, you brought company. Come in.

'I'm so embarrassed. I've been yelling.'

Did you guys hear me yelling?

'I can fly off the handle, I admit.'

Oh, wait, wait! Look, you guys!

'Look, look. Watch.'

Check it out, watch.

Ta-da.

'I didn't even take one class of nursing.'

I could totally be a nurse.

Hey, Amiga, let me see. What did you do?

Loridonna, I didn't even bleed.

It's like...nothing.

Are you guys here to kill me?

Hey, no, Suzy, no.

That's the good doctor.

'Oh, my God.'

Kissinger, you, you.

That's me.

You.

- You look weird. - Okay.

Do you think, I did the right thing?

- 'Hey, Suzy, please.' - 'I don't know.'

I think you drank a lot. Don't you?

- No. I just-- - Yes.

'I had like just a little drink.'

I can't believe you came.

You're such a good friend and you brought, yeah, people.

'We're in the middle of this thing.'

Let's just get out of here.

No, she'll calm her down and then we'll sign her.

'I can't. I can't.'

Just go in there and occupy her and send Loridonna to me.

- No way. No.

- Because this is business. - Well, I know this is business.

'The doctor. She wants the doctor.'

She wants the doctor. Just, Dave. We're good.

I'll be in the kitchen.

I think your friend has everything under control.

Oh! Yeah.

Dave is very good under pressure.

- Look what I found. - Ah!

You know what? Maybe we should finish up here.

Maybe we should have a drink.

We should probably finish up with the paperwork we have.

Are you a business before pleasure kind of guy?

Well, there are a whole group of people

who think that that's the way to go.

It's like I feel like, there's like like, peaks and valleys.

There's always-- But that's everybody, you know?

That's-that's and that's life, and I think that's God's plan.

- Peaks and valleys.

Which is... which is the bad part?

- I would go with the valley.

Only because it's lower than the peak and you just

you know, in a whole state you feel that way.

'Yeah, like you're just like, out there alone.'

- 'Right.' '

You're so in control.

'I like that.'

Turns me on.

You're such..

...a man.

Well, that's all an act.

Make-believe a lot.

I used to make-believe all the time.

Are you making

Just, you know... no girl is tough.

We cheat.

That's why you always win.

We should wrap up the food business.

Yeah.

Yeah, we should do that.

We should..

...just speed through the paperwork.

- We will, we will.

- You're so right.

You're totally right.

- It's like, be more solid! - Yes, yes.

Be more solid!

You have to want to help yourself.

And I do! I wanna help myself.

You can because there's a good you right inside.

You just gotta get the old you out.

How? How do I get the old me out of me?

You've gotta be a bully with it. You can be a bully here.

- Just kick it out! - Slam it!

- Kick it outta you! - Kick it!

- Yeah, yeah. - Right out!

It's not literal. It's not-- Ah! It's not literal, okay?

- It's kinda--

- No, it's just inside.

You're the good you. You're the strong you, okay?

Yeah, oh..

Um, here.

- Here we go, this here.. - Okay.

...this is the old you.

- Fuck you! - Alright.

Back off!

- You fucker! - Oh.

- You tried so hard to bury me. - Right.

- To bury every-- - I'm stronger than you.

- Much stronger than her. - Stronger than you'll ever be.

- I'm gonna check on Maury. - And you're so full of..

Wait!

I'm-I'm not. It's okay. I'm not going anywhere.

- I can't do this without you. - It's okay, I'm right here.

Tony, you're home.

I'll be right back.

Oh, my god.

- You know, I'll move.

He knows we weren't doing anything, right?

I mean, he..

Can you please fucking put that on?

What are the chances of you and me just taking a shot?

Maybe none.

None, none? Why so low?

I don't want to tell you yet.

Hey, look. Look, look, look.

If you got something going on, then I'll just get out of here.

No, no, no. That's not it.

But don't worry about it right now.

Oh, that's okay. Hey, don't stop.

'I can't see, I'm not gonna look.'

I'm fucking blind.

'Okay, that's a great tune.'

Well, I'll tell you. I gotta look now. Who is here?

Hola, Tony.

Loridonna, Loridonna, Loridonna, Loridonna, Loridonna.

'What an absolute honor! Don't get up.'

'Whatever you do, please, stay as you were.'

What's going on?

- He's bleeding, are you gonna-- - 'It's typical.'

He's got two, three guns in his pocket.

'It's okay.'

He's been.. That guy's been shot or something.

It's typical

'Hey, friend, you wanna give me a hand?'

Who

- 'Yeah, you.'

'Yeah, you.'

- Yeah. - 'Come on in.'

Hey, what's up?

- Woah, that's.. - Take that, take this, this.

- Yeah. - Put it on.

Might wanna have this looked at, yeah.

I'm looking at it.

What happened to you, get attacked?

Nah, it's a scratch.

It's the other guy who did the dying.

- Yeah, I know what you mean. - 'No, you don't.'

It's a nice place you got here. It's very cool.

Yeah, it's a fun pad.

She's a fucking knockout, that Loridonna.

Yeah. Yeah, I guess.

It's hard to believe she's a guy.

- I mean she was a guy.

You can't tell though, am I right?

No way.

That's what I hear.

No fucking way.

'Loridonna?'

Did you used to be a guy?

'Huh, go on, tell him.'

A long time ago.

The magic of life. You two work it out.

Wow.

Okay, no matter what he says, just stay calm.

- 'We didn't do anything. We--' - He's full of shit.

We didn't do anything so we're fine, we're safe.

- Hey, Suze. - Hey, Tony.

'Hiya, hiya.'

- Hi. - Hi.

How you doing?

- Oh, god! No! - I got you fucking my girl.

- Swear to God, no!

- I did nothing!

What was it? Which one?

- Tony, don't! - Swear to God, I didn't!

'Was he fucking you? That what you were..'

- No. - Don't. No, please.

It's okay, I'm just kidding around.

'I'm just kidding around.'

That was funny.

Loridonna's friend. She brought him over here.

- Sure. - Yeah.

- Yeah.

'Sit like a friend. Go, on sit.'

- 'Nothing.'

What are you doing with my girl in my house here?

Nothing. We're just talking.

- No.

She spends every fucking dollar I give her

right here on the palm.

Oh, that's great.

Is that your buddy back in there?

In my compound? Playing with Loridonna?

Yes, Maurice, my associate.

And we know her through.. I know her through Maurice.

- He's a good guy though. - Oh, yeah, he was fine with me.

Who's Boris?

I-I don't know. - 'Uh-uh.'

I'm asking the questions.

Boris paying you?

I don't know Boris.

If you think I do I've given you the wrong impression.

Okay.

'Okay.'

Okay. Ha ha ha.

So what do you do?

What's your line of work? What do you do?

Ahem, well, I'm a counselor.

- 'Oh.' - 'Uh-huh.'

But my real passion is beef, prime beef.

What You have two jobs?

That's like better than having one job. That's so great.

Hey. Bark, bark.

- Tony, not in public. - Bark, bark.

- Come on. God! - Bark.

- Yeah. Dave Langer, hi.

- Nice to see you.

How many head you got? Or is it all corporations now?

- Fucking corpy bastards. - More and more it is.

But we're more involved with the gourmet end.

For folks who like the finer cuts of beef.

Uh, the-the real good dry-aged stuff.

If you aged a veal, Dave, is it still a veal?

'Cause it's like gotta grow up sometime'

and then what does it become?

'It's kind of like child actors.'

You know how they never grow up, they're always--

Shut up.

- Just shut up.

So, is your stuff the really good stuff?

Cause the Japanese stuff is really excellent.

You know how they keep their beef soft?

Cause I read that they pound on them with their fists.

He's gotta pound the cow. They pound it. Pound the cow.

Right, that's Kobe beef.

So you're a steak man, medium rare.

- Rare. - Rare, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. - Me too, same.

You know, that's how I knew, because I can, I am the same.

- I am hungry.

- I would--

Shut up, of course you do.

- A drink.

You want the whole bottle?

Just a drink, please.

Come on, escape the asylum. Try not to knock anything over.

Dave, I'll see you later.

Shouldn't do it, shouldn't do it, but I'm gonna do it.

I hate to cheat, Dave. See these puppies?

They should marinate for about another-another day.

It's best just before it rots. Hold on to that, will you?

See that? Marbling.

You know what that does? That's very, very desirable.

That's a meat man's best friend right there.

Yeah, this is a lot like our beef.

I'd like to tell you something.

Out to the 'que.

I'd like to see a little bit more marbling in them..

...myself. Now we can vary the thickness for you.

Yeah?

We can cut an inch, inch and a half.

Restaurant cut, which ever you prefer.

Now, Mr. Goldbluth, he'd love that.

'He know's his stuff.'

- Oh, he loves to eat.

He's got food flown in from all over the world, that guy.

- He got caviar from Russia. - Sure.

He got these little fucking figs from like Iran.

He's got these special cakes from Paris.

- Oh yeah, right, that's great.

A lot of the taste depends on 'how good you can cook.

We can help you with that too.

We can provide recipes and we'll take you along step by step.

If you, uh..

I'm gonna let that slide, what you just said.

Just don't forget about it.

I give the barbecue cooking lessons around here.

'Oh!'

You supply the meat, I'll do the cooking.

I like that you liked me.

I miss what we had.

What we had? What did we have?

Maurice?

Can I kiss you again?

No.

Tell me.

Um..

What?

What's there?

- No, no, no.

Just tell me, tell me. Wait a minute.

Wait a minute, don't say anything weird.

But there's nothing weird.

'They just made one thing into another thing.'

They just made my outie into an innie.

Like a belly button.

- Better. - Okay.

Okay, I could see how that could be.

Yeah.

And...you're happy with that?

Ecstatic.

So it's okay.

- About the kiss.

["Need Someone To Love" playing]

* A good man out there now, baby *

* Is so very hard to find

* Need someone to love *

Whoa! Check out that color there. What color is that?

That's light red. It's-it's labeled as pink

but don't, don't be afraid of it.

I don't see pink anywhere. That's a light red?

- Exactly. - That's a very nice color.

It's called pink, but it looks light red when you see it.

- Let's drink to light red. - Absolutely.

Listen. You ever have a call for fire arms?

You ever need anything like that?

Automatic weapons, Uzis, AK-47s, M-16s

all the way up to rocket launchers, baby bombers

down the other side. We deliver anywhere in the world.

No limit. High multiples.

What's your, uh, position?

Sales.

- No kidding.

I think I'm, uh, set, right now.

Maury, we need guns?

Not offhand, no. No, not really.

I'm gonna show you something.

- Yeah.

- Each to his own. - Right right.

- Loridonna, Loridonna. - Yeah, thank you for that.

- Thank you. - Loridonna.

- He's a killer and she's a guy. - It's okay.

I'm through. I quit.

Stop it. Let's just close this.

Let me show you a little smoking technique.

Let her ride.

'Called a little smoking special technique.'

Goldbluth showed it to me. Slam it down, slam it up.

That's great.

- That's a good move. - That's super.

- Two boxes. Go get the book.

That is one gourmet technique right there.

Are you.. I don't like this guy. Nothing is right here.

Let me tell you something. He's solid. Now get the book.

Pull yourself together.

That's sweet.

You're giving me the lessons now, look at this.

'Just gonna need some information. From me to you.'

'Do you know that one time'

'he made me sit and watch this educational film on taxidermy'

and then he asked me, "How much do you think it costs"

'to clean and stuff a 115 pound ape?'

'And I'm like, "What?! That's how much I weigh."

'Oh, my God, no.'

'Should I get that?'

Si?

- Hey. - Hello.

Shh, shh, shh.

'No noise.'

'Don't you fucking speak.'

Here we go, alright.

We're all filled out.

Okay, everything looks great.

We're just gonna need you, if you would.

Just, okay, right here.

Yeah.

- 'Oops.' - 'Shit.'

- 'Well, that's okay.'

Yeah, that's fine. Just press down harder right there.

- It should write.

- It's not working, I'm sorry. - That's okay.

I'm sorry. I'm just gonna get a paper towel.

Oh! God!

'Jesus! Son of a bitch!'

'How are you, Tony? You're pain in the ass.'

'Fucking God!'

Okay, okay. Go to Goldbluth.

Just go to him, okay? All those fucking busted parts

those 1500 AK-47s, he knows all about it.

- He's next. Don't worry - Go to him, go to him.

'Cause he knows all this shit, man.

I think it's better to kill you.

Ow! God! God damn it!

- 'You mentioned that!' - 'What a fucking day!'

You gotta go to him. Go to him. He knows all about it.

No, it's gonna happen while you're still warm. Don't worry.

But first, this is from Boris.

Potty mouth.

Oh, God! No!

- Just relax. Relax! - Hey! Hey, hey, hey!

'What did you do?'

'Relax. You know what this is.'

- 'This is this.' - 'You didn't do it.'

Everything's taken care of. It's done.

- Oh, my God! - 'Relax. Just relax.'

- 'You're a murderer.' - We're professionals, lady.

- Everything is taken care of.

'

'You were supposed to show up at 12:00 outside'

'not in my house, you asshole.'

Be nice. Don't get nuts in here.

'It wasn't supposed to go like this!'

'Don't act like you don't know.'

- 'I can't believe he's dead.' - Right.

'

- 'Don't be so dramatic.' - No, porfavor.

Lady, be quiet!

- Don't move, don't move. - What the fuck!

- 'Put the gun down. Drop it!' '

I'm serious. Tell him to put the gun down. Put it down!

! - Put the gun down!

'Fuck you! Who are you?'

'Don't move. Tell him to drop it.'

- Just relax. - No! Put it down.

'Tell him to put the gun down.'

'Please. I don't wanna do this. Put it down.'

- 'Put the gun down.' - 'No. Drop it. Drop the gun.'

- 'Just take it fucking easy.' - I'm counting to two.

No, no, no, don't count. Don't start counting.

One.

You too. Hand me the gun nice and slow.

Okay, Who's this? Who are you?

You guys are gonna die, you know that, right?

So enjoy your moment.

You shut the fuck up!

Jesus Christ.

What did you say, you fat motherfucker.

Okay, alright. Alright, Dave!

Let's call the cops. Call the cops!

Good. Call the cops. You could become witnesses against us.

'You can spend the rest of your life living in a hovel.'

That's good, go ahead. Go ahead, Charo. 9-1-1.

Something smells good. Do you smell that?

'It's good. What is that?'

'I don't know, man, but I'm hungry as all hell.'

- It's like beef or something. - Phone down.

'Go sit down.'

- Maury, come here. Come here! '

- Get the fuck over here. '

I'm right here, I'm right over here.

I see a hole.

- You saw it.

- I saw you see it. - I don't wanna die.

You got something else? Because I've got nothing. Come on.

You guys like meat?

You mean to eat?

Talking about the best money can buy.

This is the gourmet stuff.

'Here's how I wanna do things.'

I think you guys are good guys.

Regular guys.

- With a job to do. - With a job to do.

Not only do we not have anything against you, frankly

'I gotta tell you, we admire your..'

Professionalism.

So, so they knocked off Tony, so what?

Tony, he was a prick.

I knew him for 20 minutes and he was annoying me.

'He's very disrespectful.'

If I had any bullets I would've shot him myself.

The only thing we owe to you for that is gratitude.

Big time. Thank you both.

You're welcome.

Appreciate it.

Alright. Well, how are we gonna do this, then?

I don't know.

- I was thinking that-- - No, please.

- Shut your cakehole, please. - Christ.

Just keep quiet.

Do you guys... have any reason to kill us?

We got any reason? No, I don't, no.

We got no reason to kill you.

- That's nice. - Mm-hmm.

I mean, we have something in common, right?

'Right.'

I'm Maurice.

My name is Bobby.

Bobby? Good.

- Bobby, this is Dave. '

- Nice to see you. - And Dave..

- I didn't.. - Oh, uh, Irv. Irving.

- Irving. - Yes.

It's unbelievable. His father's name's Irving.

- No shit. - He passed away recently.

I miss hearing his name. Thank you for keeping it alive.

Oh, sure.

And, you know, my wife, my ex-wife

she lives on Irving Boulevard.

She got the house. It's a small world.

It is, how it all ties in.

We're all, we're all in it.

I got a great respect for you, Bobby.

I would like...very much just to give you your gun back.

Well, Maurice, I would very much like that...too.

Would you pledge to me

'man to man'

that we can just sit down and eat together as friends?

We'll show you how you can eat like kings

and then we'll all go our separate ways.

Yeah, I think we could do that.

- Yeah, I don't see..

- Absolutely. - Yeah.

A pledge...of honor?

Honor is very important.

Sinatra said that it's everything.

It's everything a man's worth, honor.

I think the honor system, when instilled correctly

is...a good system.

So...let's do it that way, strictly with honor.

Thank you for doing this. You're a good pro.

Appreciate it.

Sorry about the fat thing.

Just going through a lotta shit right now.

Yeah, it's-it's okay.

Well, you wanna eat? Can we eat?

Coming right up.

Wait. Hold on, just for one second.

Just please be quiet for one second. Hey.

'Is it done?'

'Yep.'

Okay?' - She's fine.

- 'Put her on.' - Wants to know if you're okay.

Hi, honey, I'm great.

I told you it was gonna be easy.

'Do what the guys tell you to do.'

'Because if you don't stay healthy, they don't get paid.'

- 'Now, I'll see you later.' - Okay.

Tell him how you fucked up.

Tell him about Maury and the doctor.

'

- No, it's-it's fine.

It's just two guys that came out of the woodwork.

'Everything is under control.'

- Yeah, well, get rid of them. - I can't do that now, Boris.

' - I made a promise.

I don't care. I don't want any loose ends here. Understand?

Okay, everything is under control.

You're not done. I need you here.

'Goldbluth's having the party for his kid.'

He's open, he's exposed, it's getting late.

'Clean yourself up and get over here.'

" - Put on a tie. It's a party.

Okay, it's just my...Borris.

He said that we gotta take 'em out.

- No! Stop! - We gotta take them out!

- Come on, no! Come on, man! - We went through this.

- Be quiet. Shut up. - We got a promise together.

We're not doing it now.

We're gonna work out a deal. Shut up.

- Hey, we have a thing. - No, we don't.

Every time I break a deal my life gets better

so sit the fuck down.

And shut up. Big mouth.

We'll just walk away. You'll never see us again.

- Let us go right now. - Okay, works for me.

- We're not gonna say anything.

That sucks.

'Suzanne, go to Loridonna's house.'

Yeah, I am.

Because you and Tony had a fight.

- Oh, like an alibi. - That's right.

One, you and Tony had a fight.

'Two, you were at Lori's house all day.'

And three, you have no idea where Tony is.

- It's one, two, three. - Button my shoe.

Oh, Jesus.

Suzy, where's Tony?

I don't know.

What are you gonna do with these guys?

Don't worry about them. They're not going anywhere.

' - 'I don't hear anything.'

(Maurice 'Alright, let's try. Move over.'

'Tuck! Tuck in! Tuck in!'

- 'That's all I got.' - 'Tuck in! Tuck in!'

- 'Alright.' - Kick that son of a bitch.

- 'Kick out.' - 'It's out! It's out.'

- Go, just go. - Alright, push me.

Push. Alright, I'm out.

Come on, gimme your hands. I'll pull you out.

Ready, one, two..

Oh, fuck! This ain't happening, man.

- Go back in. I'll come around. - Oh, fuck me.

I'm... I'm stuck in both directions. Stuck.

Alright, hold on. I'll go around.

Just relax, relax.

- Get me out. - 'I know. Shut up.'

- 'Maury, I don't like this.' - I know, I know.

'What are you doing?'

I think I threw up a little.

'I'm comin' around.'

'Maury, you can't leave me in here! Maury!'

Aw, shit, I gotta find something. I'll be right back.

- 'Get me out first.' - I'll be right back.

'Maury, don't leave me alone.'

'I feel alone, Maury. Am I?'

'Mr. Goldbluth has given us a beautiful celebration.'

'With a bounty of food, that is, as always'

an exquisite experience.

And I say, on the occasion of Jerry becoming a man.

Thank you, Cookie Goldbluth.

Thank you for your generosity, your hospitality

'and your good taste.'

You said that exactly the way I told you to.

Well...now let us give thanks to God.

'Who brought us all together today.'

'As a boy becomes a man, in His eyes.'

'And a son becomes a man in the eyes of his father.'

'It's been said that a boy becomes a man'

'when a man is needed.'

'But when is he needed?'

'During our service this morning'

'Jerry read about a people'

who, fleeing a mighty army

'were faced with the prospect of climbing'

'an impossible mountain.'

And God spoke.

And he said

"Make an alliance with me.

To climb this mountain half way."

When those who survived made it as far as they could.

'The hand of God reached down from the heavens'

'and lifted them to the top.'

Yeah!

I saw him, Dave. He was very beautiful.

Yeah

Goldbluth. Perfect prospect, our guy.

Let's get the fuck outta here, man.

We had enough fun for one day, don't you think?

People in there wanna kill us.

And him, they're puttin' a hit on Goldbluth. Come on, let's go.

Ma

There's psychotic motherfuckers in there

trying to end our lives. Be happy you're not dead.

Something brought us to this moment.

To Goldbluth. It's so clear, Davey.

Today was no accident. Everything led us here.

This idea we have, of the perfect prospect.

We made it up. It's a fantasy.

Yeah, but I now know what we were talking about.

It's like we were saying, if somebody is up there

then He should create a guy like this for us. And He did.

Everybody's always saying they think they saw God.

"It's like I saw God."

But there's a big difference from that

when you really see him.

What did you see?

I told you.

Let's go.

Wow, he is beautiful.

'Look..'

Leon. What the hell's he doin' here?'

Brought, like us.

Shit, come on. Let's go around.

'Bobby, what year is the Caddie?'

'What is it, Irv?'

It's an '89.

- '89, hope it's a big boy.' - Yeah.

Yeah, it's a nice car. Whoa. Excuse me.

You know, I don't work for free, Boris.

This isn't my hobby, you know what I mean?

If you want people walking around saying "Boris this"

and "Boris that", you know, you gotta make an offer.

- For money. - Hey, hey, hey.

We'll take both these cocksuckers out, Frankie.

Just relax and let me work out the details?

We're gonna do 2 for 1.

Yeah, I'll decide what they're worth.

Alright, alright, alright.

' - 'I didn't do anything!'

You're supposed to be taped.

- You saw me tape them up. - I told you guys...

'No messy, now find these assholes.'

Then you come back for Goldbluth. I'm at the bar.

How come every time someone's fucking up it's my fault?

Alright, we gotta talk fast. You gotta close hard.

Fast and hard.

Hey, how ya doin'?

- Leon! - Hey!

You guys! Hey, look, who is that

That your lovely lady friend, Karen.

Used to be. Now, she is my lovely fiancรฉe, Karen.

- 'Hey, good for you.' - Congratulations.

'No, next dance, honey, next one.'

Are you a friend of the Goldbluths?

I'm Jerry's piano teacher, you?

We have a common friend who wants us

to expose Mr. Goldbluth to our high end.

Yeah, there's the man you should talk to about fine foods.

Come on, I'll introduce you.

These guys, for a living, they're meat salesmen?

Yeah.

They knock on peoples door and say

"Do you wanna buy a fuckin' cheeseburger?"

That's a living? That's a life?

Mr. Goldbluth, listen, I-I want you to meet some people, here.

Gentlemen. This is, uh, Dave and--

- Maury, Maury. - Maury. Dave and Maury.

- Hi. Beautiful party.

Tony said you have a great appreciation for good tastes.

- He said we should connect.

He'll be here. He speaks very highly of you.

Said you taught him everything he knew about barbecue.

Yeah, well. What the hell does he know?

See ya.

No, really, he says you're a real magician, you know?

We supply gourmet clients with the finest beef in the world.

We think you should have the best.

Yeah? Oh.

I already got the best. You see, I get it from Omaha.

So you guys have a good time, anyway, okay?

Hey, champ.

Gentlemen.

* The time has come

* Turn down the light *

'You guys are almost the same age.'

'Cindy, meet my son, Jerry.'

Hey, Jerry, nice to meet you.

What the hell's going on here?

Could you excuse us real quick?

Dad, come here.

'Do you think I'm ready?'

Ha ha. Are you kiddin'? You're gonna love it.

Jesus.

When I was you age I would've given my right arm for this

set up like this. My first time, I was ten.

I mean, you're like old already.

Alright, look, you wait here I'm gonna check the front.

'They'll kill him when they get back.'

We gotta sell him now, bring them in.

Harold, what is go-- What is going on

- In the car. - In the ca..

Faye, Faye, Faye, come here. What's the matter with you?

The girl does parties, you know, graduations

birthday parties?

'Harry.'

Wish I had a camera.

This could like a happiness poster.

The one they-they sell in the gift shops.

Thanks. You hear that? It's obvious.

I'm getting rid of that girl.

Let him just have a hand job. Just...one time?

One time..

There, see.

Have another drink.

Who is tha..

Wow, you really keep her off balance

keeps the flame alive, huh, Mr. Goldbluth?

Cookie. Call me Cookie.

Let me ask you something, when you do your grilling

you like your steaks cut an inch or an inch and a half thick?

What, are you putting me on? Two inches.

'These guys are gone, they're long gone.'

You know what? I'm done. I wanna go get Goldbluth.

And we'll call it a night.

I'm talking about the best.

40 day, dry aged, prime Kobe-Angus hybrid.

Superior animals.

- On Earth...on Mars, I dunno.

I've never eaten there. Hey, Maury.

But anything, say, within two, three million miles

'of Sherman Oaks, this is five star stuff.'

- 'Get the book.'

'The one monthly amount includes everything'

the filets, the T-bone, the New York cuts

the London broil and the magnificent rib eye.

All at a fraction of the price you're spending now

flying in who knows what from Omaha.

- Let me show you something.

I don't wanna get into he-said-she-said

but this steer had problems late in life.

In all probability.

Are you saying this is bad meat? This is prime beef.

This is choice labeled as prime.

We see this all the time. No attention to quality.

Mr. Goldbluth...we can take you to the top of the beef world.

The highest altitude in gourmet dining.

Meat so soft, people don't even bother to use their teeth.

The meat just seems to melt

as it makes contact with your mouth.

Yeah. You hear that?

You don't even have to chew it.

I like it.

It was packed full of meat like that.

It looked like a giant gift basket.

Make a-a nice gift for the uncles.

- That's a lovely gesture. - Yeah..

You know what?

I'm strangely attracted to the misty yellow color.

There's nothing strange about that.

- 'Open the door!' - Ow!

- Another door. - Again, you motherfucker.

Fuck you, I ain't doing that again.

'Let's go around this way.'

Seven freezers, seven uncles.

I'm just gonna need to get a little credit information

nothing to worry about.

- Boris.

- Just a little bit.

But we've got everything under control, we chased them inside.

- They're hiding in the kitchen. - Good.

Now find Goldbluth and get him in there too

because this is gonna be a goodbye package.

We'll just bang him with the other two.

'Two red, two blue and...right now.'

Yeah, you know what? I'm gonna need you to sign right here.

- Here, here and here. - That's a lotta places.

Take it.

This is the best, right?

See, it's a matter of personal preference.

- Davey! - There's only one best.

'That's what always pissed me off about "the best."

'I mean what is best?'

Is it best for me or is it what's best for you?

You guys lied.

- You swore on Sinatra. - Hey.

'Go! Get him! Go, go, go!'

'Watch out.'

'Move! Move! Go!'

God damn it!

'Tear this fucking door down.'

It's preference. It's selling. It's selling.

'And knowing what to buy, who to buy it from.'

For all I know, you two guys could be shysters

who are trying to scam the wrong motherfucker.

But you seem okay.

* Oh-h-h, yeah

* Oh-h-h, yeah *

Mr. Goldbluth.

There's people in that party that want to kill you.

There's a reason why Tony isn't here.

Talk fast.

- Get outta here. - We're movin' out.

- Come on, Mr. Goldbluth. - Come on, move it, move it.

- Ralph. - Yeah, boss.

- 21 grand. - You got it.

Alright, fellas.

For your gifts.

Mr. Goldbluth..

...it was your friend, Tony's.

I'll be expecting some freezers in the next 10 days.

They're on their way.

Yeah, I want that joint cleaned up like it never happened.

Never happened.

Dad!

Dad, you okay?

I'm always okay. We were just celebrating.

'Dick.'

You look tired, how you doing?

Jesus, by now I was expecting a postcard from Ensenada.

I don't know, let's check.

These count?

You know, why don't you get Dick's opinion?

'Three, what do you think of that?'

Before you answer, how about four?

Of course, five is a number that everybody is comfortable with.

Probably the hand, somethin' to do with that.

- No.

Six. Of course if I told you six, I'd be lying.

- 'Cause he's forgetting seven. - Seven.

What the hell is this?

Seven. We wrote some paper...seven.

You want me to spike seven boxes?

No, no, on this one be leisurely 'cause this is gold.

We got cash. 21 grand.

'Minus our commission.'

What is this? There you go. Come on, honey, jump on.

'Mom, look what Daddy got me.'

- That's it, honey.

- Yes, I am. - We're gonna go up high.

Ain't she beautiful?

'Maury, don't burn my chicken.'

You're burning the chicken, you idiot.

Here's what we do... some of this.

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