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1
00:00:09,954 --> 00:00:11,564
Aw, look at that.
2
00:00:11,738 --> 00:00:12,783
Such a good pop-pop.
3
00:00:12,913 --> 00:00:13,827
You want to give her
back to me now?
4
00:00:13,958 --> 00:00:15,438
Mm, I can't.
5
00:00:15,568 --> 00:00:17,309
Oh, I know, she's so sweet.
6
00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:18,919
No, no, I...
7
00:00:19,006 --> 00:00:21,095
I can't move my arms or my legs.
8
00:00:22,793 --> 00:00:23,924
Every part of me is asleep.
9
00:00:24,055 --> 00:00:25,274
I've been sitting here for--
10
00:00:25,361 --> 00:00:27,363
Well, I'd tell you,
11
00:00:27,493 --> 00:00:29,495
but I can't turn my head
to look at my watch.
12
00:00:29,626 --> 00:00:31,628
You want me
to crack your neck?
13
00:00:31,758 --> 00:00:33,151
No, no, don't touch me
that much--I'm just gonna get back here...
14
00:00:33,282 --> 00:00:34,674
Don't, don't-- oh!
15
00:00:34,805 --> 00:00:36,241
Oh! Oh!
16
00:00:36,372 --> 00:00:38,025
Whew! Oh!
17
00:00:38,156 --> 00:00:40,158
Oh, that was okay right there.
18
00:00:40,245 --> 00:00:41,768
Where'd you learn to do that?
19
00:00:41,899 --> 00:00:43,379
TikTok.
20
00:00:43,509 --> 00:00:45,337
I wasn't actually sure
if it would work.
21
00:00:46,382 --> 00:00:47,774
Ooh, wait a min-- Okay.
22
00:00:47,905 --> 00:00:50,168
Yeah, I'm starting to feel
a little life in my foot
23
00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:51,735
right there,
that's good.
24
00:00:51,822 --> 00:00:52,736
All right.
25
00:00:52,866 --> 00:00:54,215
Well,
26
00:00:54,346 --> 00:00:55,739
Malcolm is outside in the car,
27
00:00:55,826 --> 00:00:58,437
bidding a fond adieu
to Museum Girl.
28
00:00:58,568 --> 00:01:00,526
I mean fond, I'm talking...
29
00:01:02,223 --> 00:01:04,878
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
30
00:01:05,052 --> 00:01:06,097
Museum Girl.
31
00:01:08,186 --> 00:01:10,536
Ooh, ooh, Malcolm!
32
00:01:10,667 --> 00:01:12,799
Ooh!
33
00:01:12,930 --> 00:01:13,974
Ooh.
34
00:01:14,105 --> 00:01:16,412
Uh, would you like some time
35
00:01:16,586 --> 00:01:18,457
to be alone with yourself?
36
00:01:19,719 --> 00:01:21,721
I'd like to be dead.
37
00:01:21,852 --> 00:01:23,767
Okay, so, uh...
38
00:01:23,897 --> 00:01:25,595
who's Museum Girl?
39
00:01:25,725 --> 00:01:27,423
Oh, it's this new woman
Malcolm's been seeing,
40
00:01:27,553 --> 00:01:28,598
but he's being
super secretive about it.
41
00:01:28,728 --> 00:01:30,034
He won't even tell us her name.
42
00:01:30,121 --> 00:01:31,818
Yeah. But we do know
he met her at a museum.
43
00:01:31,949 --> 00:01:33,429
Hence the sobriquet.
44
00:01:33,559 --> 00:01:34,908
Uh, say what now?
45
00:01:34,995 --> 00:01:36,519
Moniker.
46
00:01:37,998 --> 00:01:38,999
Nickname.
47
00:01:39,173 --> 00:01:40,523
Oh, okay.
48
00:01:41,915 --> 00:01:43,787
Well, if we know Malcolm,
49
00:01:43,874 --> 00:01:46,746
her nickname should
be "gone soon."
50
00:01:48,444 --> 00:01:50,402
What does that mean?
51
00:01:50,489 --> 00:01:52,230
Well, you see, Courtney,
52
00:01:52,361 --> 00:01:55,102
whenever Malcolm starts
to date someone seriously,
53
00:01:55,233 --> 00:01:58,802
he always comes up with a reason
to break up with her.
54
00:01:58,889 --> 00:02:01,544
You know, "Dad, she's great,
55
00:02:01,674 --> 00:02:04,416
but... she blinks too much."
56
00:02:05,939 --> 00:02:08,289
There is always a "but."
57
00:02:08,420 --> 00:02:11,554
Oh, one time,
the "but" was a flat butt.
58
00:02:11,684 --> 00:02:13,599
Which actually
made sense...
59
00:02:13,730 --> 00:02:14,948
That did make sense,
it made a lot of sense.
60
00:02:16,733 --> 00:02:17,951
Oh!
61
00:02:18,082 --> 00:02:19,431
Hi, Malcolm.
62
00:02:19,562 --> 00:02:21,172
Nice try, Courtney.
63
00:02:21,302 --> 00:02:23,304
I saw you spying on us.
64
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:24,871
I'm sorry.
65
00:02:24,958 --> 00:02:26,960
If it makes it any better,
I didn't see her face.
66
00:02:27,091 --> 00:02:28,832
'Cause your mouth was
all over it.
67
00:02:30,921 --> 00:02:33,184
Why are you keeping her
a secret, Malcolm?
68
00:02:33,314 --> 00:02:34,707
Is she ugly?
69
00:02:34,838 --> 00:02:36,666
Is she missing a side tooth?
70
00:02:37,667 --> 00:02:40,191
She is beautiful, damn it, okay?
71
00:02:40,321 --> 00:02:43,063
Her name is Angela,
and we get along great.
72
00:02:43,150 --> 00:02:45,718
She is smart, she is funny...
73
00:02:45,849 --> 00:02:48,155
But...
74
00:02:50,288 --> 00:02:52,769
There is no "but."
75
00:02:52,899 --> 00:02:54,988
Okay, okay, okay,
is there a "though"?
76
00:02:55,119 --> 00:02:57,077
Or a "however," or...
77
00:02:57,208 --> 00:02:58,992
"having said that"?
78
00:02:59,079 --> 00:03:00,864
That was the old me.
79
00:03:00,951 --> 00:03:03,040
But I have never dated
anyone like Angela.
80
00:03:03,170 --> 00:03:04,302
She is amazing.
81
00:03:04,433 --> 00:03:06,347
Look, check this out:
We just went
82
00:03:06,435 --> 00:03:08,132
to the Goya exhibit
at the Norton Simon,
83
00:03:08,262 --> 00:03:10,090
and she knew more
than the tour guide.
84
00:03:10,264 --> 00:03:12,353
Well, that's good, man.
85
00:03:12,441 --> 00:03:13,311
You know what?
I'm happy for you.
86
00:03:13,442 --> 00:03:14,704
Thank you, Pop.
87
00:03:14,834 --> 00:03:16,575
Yeah, your mom is going
to be thrilled.
88
00:03:16,662 --> 00:03:18,272
- Oh, no, no.
- No, no.
No, no, no, no.
89
00:03:21,275 --> 00:03:22,712
As soon as she finds out,
90
00:03:22,842 --> 00:03:24,278
she'll want to meet her,
she'll make a big fuss.
91
00:03:24,365 --> 00:03:25,628
She will scare her off.
92
00:03:25,758 --> 00:03:26,890
Yeah, she does
tend to go overboard.
93
00:03:27,020 --> 00:03:28,152
Overboard?
94
00:03:28,282 --> 00:03:29,240
She starts
underwater.
95
00:03:30,807 --> 00:03:33,157
Yeah, she can get
a little crazy, right?
96
00:03:34,201 --> 00:03:36,029
Hey, keep my mother's name
- out of your mouth!
- You know what?
97
00:03:36,203 --> 00:03:37,553
I don't know
who you think you are.
98
00:03:37,683 --> 00:03:39,076
I don't know who
you think you are,
99
00:03:39,206 --> 00:03:40,338
but that's a no up in here.
100
00:03:40,425 --> 00:03:41,992
- My bad.
- You don't talk about Tina.
101
00:03:42,122 --> 00:03:43,559
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
102
00:03:43,733 --> 00:03:44,995
♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪
103
00:03:49,956 --> 00:03:51,523
I got to say, Marty,
104
00:03:51,697 --> 00:03:53,830
you did a nice job getting
Daphne dressed this morning.
105
00:03:53,917 --> 00:03:55,962
She's even got
the right kind of diaper on.
106
00:03:56,093 --> 00:03:58,487
You may also notice
it is not on backwards.
107
00:03:58,661 --> 00:04:00,010
Or sideways.
108
00:04:01,228 --> 00:04:03,666
I still don't know
how he managed to do that.
109
00:04:03,796 --> 00:04:05,929
Those diapers had
a very counterintuitive design!
110
00:04:07,496 --> 00:04:08,888
Hey.
111
00:04:10,107 --> 00:04:11,456
Ooh!
112
00:04:11,587 --> 00:04:14,024
Divine, simply divine.
113
00:04:14,111 --> 00:04:16,679
- Oh, that's beautiful, babe.
- Yeah, that's the one, Mama.
114
00:04:16,809 --> 00:04:19,420
I don't know,
it's for Daphne's christening.
115
00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:21,292
You know,
I want something that says,
116
00:04:21,422 --> 00:04:23,163
"I'm the grandmother,
but I can still
117
00:04:23,337 --> 00:04:24,600
read without my glasses."
118
00:04:26,123 --> 00:04:27,777
But you can't though.
119
00:04:27,951 --> 00:04:30,519
I know, Calvin, that's why
I want the dress to say it.
120
00:04:31,955 --> 00:04:34,044
- Hey, hey, everybody.
-Oh, hey, Malcolm.
121
00:04:34,218 --> 00:04:35,959
Amazon for Mama.
122
00:04:36,133 --> 00:04:38,527
Please tell me
that's not more dresses.
123
00:04:38,657 --> 00:04:40,833
No, it's not dresses.
124
00:04:40,964 --> 00:04:44,271
It's the baby stuff that
I subscribe to on Amazon.
125
00:04:44,402 --> 00:04:46,317
Because Marty doesn't know
what he's doing.
126
00:04:48,058 --> 00:04:50,539
Like when he bought
the sideways diapers.
127
00:04:52,279 --> 00:04:53,759
Hey, guys.
128
00:04:53,933 --> 00:04:55,805
Oh, hey, Gemma.
129
00:04:59,678 --> 00:05:01,898
He's mad about the evite.
130
00:05:02,072 --> 00:05:03,943
I'm not mad.
131
00:05:04,988 --> 00:05:07,338
I'm just disappointed.
132
00:05:08,382 --> 00:05:09,819
Uh, I didn't get
an evite.
133
00:05:09,949 --> 00:05:11,777
Uh, yes, you did get an evite,
you did.
134
00:05:11,951 --> 00:05:13,518
You see, the funny thing
about an evite is
135
00:05:13,605 --> 00:05:15,215
it tells you
when someone opens it.
136
00:05:15,346 --> 00:05:17,217
And you all opened it.
137
00:05:18,697 --> 00:05:20,090
- Oh, oh, that-that evite.
- Yeah, right.
138
00:05:20,264 --> 00:05:21,787
- That one.
- Yes.
139
00:05:21,961 --> 00:05:24,094
He's very excited for his party,
140
00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:26,487
because it has kombucha
and bocce ball.
141
00:05:26,575 --> 00:05:28,751
Or as we like
to call them,
142
00:05:28,881 --> 00:05:31,014
"Booch and Botch."
143
00:05:31,144 --> 00:05:32,363
All right, you know what, Dave?
144
00:05:32,537 --> 00:05:34,278
We'll come, uh, we'll all come.
145
00:05:34,408 --> 00:05:35,235
Okay.
All right?
146
00:05:35,366 --> 00:05:36,715
Ooh!
147
00:05:36,802 --> 00:05:38,891
I say yes to that dress.
148
00:05:39,022 --> 00:05:39,979
Oh, I love it.
149
00:05:40,110 --> 00:05:41,241
It's perfect.
150
00:05:41,372 --> 00:05:43,069
Oh, yeah, perf. Totes perf.
151
00:05:44,375 --> 00:05:45,550
No, I-I don't know,
don't you think
152
00:05:45,681 --> 00:05:47,596
it's a little flashy
for a christening?
153
00:05:55,429 --> 00:05:56,735
Excuse me?
154
00:05:57,736 --> 00:05:59,129
Uh, Gemma, a little help here?
155
00:05:59,216 --> 00:06:01,697
Mm-mm. Don't put me in this.
156
00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:03,786
Why do you hate it?
157
00:06:03,916 --> 00:06:05,222
Or is it
that you hate your mother?
158
00:06:05,352 --> 00:06:06,484
Do you not want me
to come?
159
00:06:06,615 --> 00:06:07,877
Is this how you disinvite me?!
160
00:06:08,007 --> 00:06:09,574
Malcolm has
a serious girlfriend!
161
00:06:09,705 --> 00:06:11,532
What?!
162
00:06:12,621 --> 00:06:14,187
Oh, wow.
163
00:06:14,318 --> 00:06:16,363
Marty, that's cold.
164
00:06:16,537 --> 00:06:18,844
We are no longer brothers.
165
00:06:20,411 --> 00:06:22,631
Malcolm, is that true?
166
00:06:22,718 --> 00:06:23,980
Mama, Mama, look,
just calm down, okay?
167
00:06:24,067 --> 00:06:25,503
It's only been a month.
168
00:06:25,634 --> 00:06:26,809
Ooh, let's set up a dinner!
169
00:06:26,983 --> 00:06:28,245
What does she like to eat?
170
00:06:28,375 --> 00:06:29,550
Does she have any allergies?
171
00:06:29,681 --> 00:06:30,856
You know what,
I can just call her.
172
00:06:32,205 --> 00:06:33,598
Tina, I got it.
173
00:06:33,729 --> 00:06:34,947
The Booch and Botch party
tomorrow night.
174
00:06:35,078 --> 00:06:36,383
You know what, Malcolm,
175
00:06:36,514 --> 00:06:37,428
I'm gonna put you down
for a plus-one.
176
00:06:37,602 --> 00:06:38,995
Oh, perfect!
177
00:06:39,125 --> 00:06:40,039
Thank you, Dave.
178
00:06:40,213 --> 00:06:41,388
This is so exciting.
Okay.
179
00:06:41,519 --> 00:06:43,129
Two more dresses.
180
00:06:46,829 --> 00:06:48,569
- Hey, Marty?
- Yeah?
181
00:06:48,657 --> 00:06:50,963
- Run.
- Okay.
182
00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:57,317
Ooh, great shot.
183
00:06:57,491 --> 00:07:00,059
You know, Dave,
I don't get this kombucha.
184
00:07:00,233 --> 00:07:01,757
There's no alcohol in it?
185
00:07:01,844 --> 00:07:03,846
It-it just tastes bad?
186
00:07:04,803 --> 00:07:06,457
Dave, mine is great.
187
00:07:06,587 --> 00:07:08,807
Well, I'm glad
some people appreciate it.
188
00:07:10,983 --> 00:07:12,768
I poured mine out.
This is pinot.
189
00:07:12,898 --> 00:07:14,465
- Hook a brother up.
- Okay.
190
00:07:16,510 --> 00:07:17,773
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!
191
00:07:17,860 --> 00:07:20,950
They just pulled up,
and guess what?
192
00:07:21,124 --> 00:07:23,648
Angela is really great
at parallel parking.
193
00:07:24,431 --> 00:07:25,650
Hey, everybody.
194
00:07:25,781 --> 00:07:26,651
This is--
195
00:07:26,782 --> 00:07:28,958
Angela!
196
00:07:29,915 --> 00:07:33,310
Ooh, oh, my goodness,
I love your outfit.
197
00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:35,573
And your hair
and that jewelry.
198
00:07:35,704 --> 00:07:37,053
I just love you.
199
00:07:37,183 --> 00:07:38,794
Aw, that's so nice.
200
00:07:38,881 --> 00:07:40,230
Well, that's me.
I'm nice.
201
00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:41,448
You're gonna love me.
202
00:07:41,622 --> 00:07:43,363
Uh, Pop?
203
00:07:43,494 --> 00:07:44,930
Yeah, I got this.
Uh, hey, uh...
204
00:07:45,104 --> 00:07:46,976
Um, nice to meet you.
I'm Malcolm's dad.
205
00:07:47,106 --> 00:07:49,761
Tina, Tina, Tina,
come on, babe, we--
206
00:07:49,935 --> 00:07:51,371
we need you
to take it down a notch.
207
00:07:52,416 --> 00:07:56,072
Calvin, Marty's about to see
his baby be christened, okay?
208
00:07:56,202 --> 00:07:59,640
And I have yet to see either
of my babies married.
209
00:07:59,771 --> 00:08:02,339
Let me speak this
into existence.
210
00:08:02,469 --> 00:08:04,994
You're about to speak her
back into the car.
211
00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:08,911
I cannot tell you how excited
212
00:08:09,041 --> 00:08:11,130
I am to finally meet you.
213
00:08:11,304 --> 00:08:13,742
Ooh! I know what we can to do.
214
00:08:13,829 --> 00:08:16,701
My other son Marty has
the cutest little baby.
215
00:08:16,875 --> 00:08:19,095
Marty!
216
00:08:19,225 --> 00:08:20,836
Wave to Angela.
217
00:08:23,447 --> 00:08:25,928
Yeah, I don't know
if Malcolm told you,
218
00:08:26,102 --> 00:08:28,669
but she's gonna be
christened Sunday.
219
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:30,584
We would love
for you to come.
220
00:08:30,715 --> 00:08:31,934
I would love that.
221
00:08:32,064 --> 00:08:33,326
I've never been
to a christening.
222
00:08:33,457 --> 00:08:34,458
Oh, it's so fun.
223
00:08:34,588 --> 00:08:35,676
Oh, and you're gonna
love my outfit.
224
00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,678
It's a little bit
of Gayle King,
225
00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:39,506
with a splash
of Olivia Pope,
226
00:08:39,680 --> 00:08:41,552
and a hint
of "Housewife Reunion."
227
00:08:41,682 --> 00:08:43,336
Atlanta not Potomac.
228
00:08:44,773 --> 00:08:46,122
All right,
I'm not familiar.
229
00:08:46,252 --> 00:08:47,819
Oh, you know.
230
00:08:47,950 --> 00:08:49,865
The most stylish
Black women on TV.
231
00:08:49,952 --> 00:08:51,301
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
232
00:08:51,388 --> 00:08:52,258
I don't have a TV.
233
00:08:52,345 --> 00:08:53,564
What?
234
00:08:53,694 --> 00:08:54,783
It's such a time suck.
235
00:08:54,957 --> 00:08:57,089
Empty calories for
the mind, you know?
236
00:08:57,176 --> 00:08:58,569
Oh, well...
237
00:08:58,656 --> 00:09:00,310
I don't watch
that much TV anyway.
238
00:09:02,138 --> 00:09:03,400
I'm really more
of a book girl.
Ooh.
239
00:09:03,530 --> 00:09:06,098
My grandma always called
TV the "idiot box."
240
00:09:06,229 --> 00:09:08,187
I love your top.
241
00:09:08,318 --> 00:09:09,667
Thank you.
242
00:09:09,754 --> 00:09:10,973
I go thrifting, too.
243
00:09:14,672 --> 00:09:16,239
- That's your little one?
- Mm-hmm.
244
00:09:16,369 --> 00:09:17,936
So precious!
245
00:09:18,067 --> 00:09:19,633
Yeah, that's my baby girl.
246
00:09:19,764 --> 00:09:21,635
And in her little
princess onesie.
247
00:09:21,766 --> 00:09:23,376
Smart, better
she know now
248
00:09:23,463 --> 00:09:25,422
she'll be living in a
patriarchy her whole life.
249
00:09:28,033 --> 00:09:30,819
Wow, a principal at
a private school?
250
00:09:30,993 --> 00:09:32,255
My seventh year.
251
00:09:32,429 --> 00:09:34,039
I hope you don't listen
when people say
252
00:09:34,126 --> 00:09:36,433
you're just perpetuating
a two-tiered educational system.
253
00:09:38,565 --> 00:09:41,133
I'm not saying kombucha
doesn't improve gut health.
254
00:09:41,220 --> 00:09:44,223
I'm just asking,
who wants us to believe that?
255
00:09:44,397 --> 00:09:46,878
The people who've made it
their life's work
256
00:09:47,009 --> 00:09:48,967
to study
stomach microbiomes?
257
00:09:50,229 --> 00:09:51,665
I'm just saying...
258
00:09:51,796 --> 00:09:53,058
follow the money.
259
00:09:54,799 --> 00:09:57,410
Hey, I hate to
interrupt you two,
260
00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:58,716
but I come bearing
kombucha.
261
00:09:58,803 --> 00:10:00,152
Thanks.
262
00:10:00,239 --> 00:10:02,459
Your friend Dave has been
telling me all about it.
263
00:10:02,589 --> 00:10:05,244
Oh, well, I have
come to save you.
264
00:10:07,420 --> 00:10:08,813
Save her?
265
00:10:15,298 --> 00:10:17,735
You sure I can't
help you clean up?
266
00:10:17,866 --> 00:10:19,041
Oh, no, we got this. Thanks.
267
00:10:19,171 --> 00:10:22,435
All right, well, it was
so nice to meet you all.
268
00:10:22,566 --> 00:10:24,524
- Bye-bye.
- Bye, y'all.
269
00:10:28,354 --> 00:10:29,747
Ain't she great?
270
00:10:31,488 --> 00:10:33,969
I love the way she just says
whatever's on her mind.
271
00:10:35,318 --> 00:10:38,799
Her fearlessness
is just so inspiring.
272
00:10:38,887 --> 00:10:42,281
Yeah, I see all your teeth,
- man. That's a good sign.
- She's... pretty.
273
00:10:42,368 --> 00:10:44,066
Okay.
274
00:10:46,285 --> 00:10:48,113
You know what? Good for Malcolm.
275
00:10:48,244 --> 00:10:49,985
You know,
not long ago,
276
00:10:50,115 --> 00:10:52,465
he would have been searching for
something wrong with that lady.
277
00:10:52,596 --> 00:10:55,555
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, Angela's great.
278
00:10:55,686 --> 00:10:56,687
Yeah. So great.
279
00:10:56,817 --> 00:10:57,949
Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
280
00:10:58,123 --> 00:11:00,343
- Really, really great.
- Yeah.
281
00:11:00,473 --> 00:11:02,214
But is she great?
282
00:11:02,345 --> 00:11:03,563
Ooh.
283
00:11:03,694 --> 00:11:05,348
Uh, guys,
284
00:11:05,478 --> 00:11:07,176
uh...
285
00:11:07,350 --> 00:11:08,481
she sucks.
286
00:11:08,612 --> 00:11:10,266
Dave!
Ugh.
287
00:11:10,396 --> 00:11:11,658
Dave.
288
00:11:11,789 --> 00:11:13,573
You shouldn't say that.
You can think that--
289
00:11:13,704 --> 00:11:15,880
I was thinking it--
but you shouldn't say it.
290
00:11:16,011 --> 00:11:18,883
Well, it had to be said.
She's a booch hater.
291
00:11:19,014 --> 00:11:20,667
And she hates princesses.
292
00:11:20,798 --> 00:11:22,713
She called my school "elitist."
293
00:11:22,843 --> 00:11:24,280
- She said that?
- She didn't say it,
294
00:11:24,410 --> 00:11:27,152
she said "people" say it,
but I know she's "people."
295
00:11:27,283 --> 00:11:28,937
Yeah.
296
00:11:29,067 --> 00:11:30,590
I knew there was something
wrong with that girl.
297
00:11:30,721 --> 00:11:32,462
Who doesn't like TV?
298
00:11:34,507 --> 00:11:36,683
You know what? I'm taking
her off the evite list.
299
00:11:36,814 --> 00:11:38,076
Yeah.
That's it.
300
00:11:38,947 --> 00:11:40,861
Oh, boy.
301
00:11:42,646 --> 00:11:44,691
What did you do?
302
00:11:44,822 --> 00:11:46,780
I invited her to
Daphne's christening.
303
00:11:46,955 --> 00:11:48,391
Oh, God, no!
304
00:11:48,521 --> 00:11:51,394
I know. What was I thinking?
305
00:11:51,568 --> 00:11:53,483
Well,
306
00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,876
maybe Angela's not that bad.
307
00:11:56,007 --> 00:11:57,008
Maybe she was just nervous.
308
00:11:57,182 --> 00:11:59,445
There's a lot of us
and one of her.
309
00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:01,360
Yeah-- and, look,
and Malcolm's smart.
310
00:12:01,491 --> 00:12:04,015
You know? I'm sure he sees
something that we don't see.
311
00:12:04,102 --> 00:12:07,062
You know, great qualities
underneath all the...
312
00:12:07,192 --> 00:12:09,325
terrible qualities
that we've seen.
313
00:12:11,631 --> 00:12:13,633
Yeah. Everybody
has good and bad.
314
00:12:13,764 --> 00:12:15,679
With every relationship,
you have to put up
315
00:12:15,809 --> 00:12:17,594
with little annoyances
about your partner.
316
00:12:17,768 --> 00:12:19,465
God knows we have them.
317
00:12:19,552 --> 00:12:21,337
Yeah.
318
00:12:25,558 --> 00:12:26,690
"We..."
319
00:12:26,820 --> 00:12:28,648
meaning "us"?
320
00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:36,221
No.
321
00:12:39,224 --> 00:12:41,835
Okay-- what exactly
about me annoys you?
322
00:12:42,010 --> 00:12:43,620
I shouldn't have
said "annoying."
323
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:44,925
Uh, but you did.
324
00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:46,797
So, please,
325
00:12:46,927 --> 00:12:48,494
tell me what I do
that annoys you.
326
00:12:48,581 --> 00:12:51,454
And be specif.
327
00:12:51,584 --> 00:12:53,369
That.
328
00:12:53,499 --> 00:12:54,718
What?
329
00:12:54,848 --> 00:12:55,936
Shortening words for no reason.
330
00:12:56,024 --> 00:12:57,808
Just say "specific."
331
00:12:57,938 --> 00:12:59,288
Yeah, but it saves time
and it's cool.
332
00:12:59,462 --> 00:13:01,203
You know what?
You're being totes ridic.
333
00:13:01,333 --> 00:13:03,118
Oh.
334
00:13:03,292 --> 00:13:06,860
I'm the one who sounds
totally ridiculous?
335
00:13:06,947 --> 00:13:08,340
Oh. Oh, did you see that?
336
00:13:08,471 --> 00:13:11,039
That right there--
that just took forever.
337
00:13:17,958 --> 00:13:19,656
What is up, Calvin and Tina?
338
00:13:19,786 --> 00:13:21,919
It is lovely to see you.
339
00:13:22,006 --> 00:13:23,964
- Oh, come on, Dave.
- Oh.
340
00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:26,619
I am surprised that
you do not like this.
341
00:13:28,143 --> 00:13:30,145
Uh, Dave, why are you
talking like that?
342
00:13:30,232 --> 00:13:31,798
Oh, well, it was
brought to my attention
343
00:13:31,929 --> 00:13:33,496
that I am known
for truncating words
344
00:13:33,583 --> 00:13:36,151
in a way that Gemma Johnson
345
00:13:36,325 --> 00:13:38,327
finds unattractive.
346
00:13:38,457 --> 00:13:40,111
Like when you said Daphne
347
00:13:40,242 --> 00:13:41,982
was "adorbs"?
Mm.
348
00:13:42,157 --> 00:13:43,767
That is correct.
349
00:13:43,854 --> 00:13:46,378
So now I am only
using full words
350
00:13:46,509 --> 00:13:48,032
with Gemma Johnson
351
00:13:48,206 --> 00:13:50,034
in the hopes
of increasing my odds
352
00:13:50,165 --> 00:13:52,471
of sexual intercourse.
353
00:13:53,516 --> 00:13:55,561
Those odds are
plummeting, David.
354
00:13:57,172 --> 00:13:59,739
Hey, hey, everybody.
355
00:13:59,870 --> 00:14:02,438
Oh, this is so nice.
356
00:14:02,612 --> 00:14:03,961
Hi, Malcolm. Um...
357
00:14:04,092 --> 00:14:05,832
that's a new look.
358
00:14:07,269 --> 00:14:10,185
Why the hell does my
son have on a purse?
359
00:14:10,359 --> 00:14:12,317
I got him a man-bag.
360
00:14:12,404 --> 00:14:14,363
His look needed some updating.
361
00:14:15,233 --> 00:14:17,192
Boy, are your toes
out in church?
362
00:14:19,063 --> 00:14:21,065
Uh, yes, Pop.
363
00:14:21,196 --> 00:14:23,415
Angela got me thinking
when she asked,
364
00:14:23,546 --> 00:14:26,592
"Why are we hiding our feet
from God? He made them."
365
00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:29,987
Well, isn't Angela just
full of good questions?
366
00:14:32,337 --> 00:14:34,078
Yeah, Angela's full of...
367
00:14:34,209 --> 00:14:36,298
Uh, Tina-- church.
368
00:14:37,995 --> 00:14:39,170
Would you listen to them?
369
00:14:39,301 --> 00:14:41,259
Makes me glad
we're not a couple.
370
00:14:41,390 --> 00:14:43,348
Don't worry,
we would never be a couple.
371
00:14:45,872 --> 00:14:47,700
Boy, you hit that "never"
pretty hard.
372
00:14:50,486 --> 00:14:52,401
Why have we not started?
373
00:14:52,531 --> 00:14:54,490
It is three of the clock.
374
00:14:58,450 --> 00:15:01,410
Oh. We should take our seats.
375
00:15:04,413 --> 00:15:07,155
We should take our seats.
376
00:15:07,285 --> 00:15:09,287
I mean, how is she
gonna tell us when to sit
377
00:15:09,418 --> 00:15:10,854
at our own grandbaby's
christening?
378
00:15:10,941 --> 00:15:13,335
Right? I mean, she got
some nerve, right?
379
00:15:13,465 --> 00:15:15,598
We gonna sit down
when we want to sit.
380
00:15:15,728 --> 00:15:17,339
Ain't nobody gonna tell us... When we want to sit
is when we sit.
381
00:15:17,469 --> 00:15:19,036
- ...when we sit. Not a word.
- Nobody tell us when to sit.
382
00:15:19,123 --> 00:15:21,256
We should probably
- go sit, though.
- Yeah, we should sit.
383
00:15:23,388 --> 00:15:27,131
Welcome, everyone,
to this most blessed occasion.
384
00:15:27,305 --> 00:15:30,526
Will the parents of Daphne Luna
Pridgeon-Butler come up,
385
00:15:30,656 --> 00:15:33,224
- along with the godparents?
-All right.
386
00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:36,662
Oh, no.
387
00:15:36,793 --> 00:15:38,055
Where does she think she going?
388
00:15:38,229 --> 00:15:40,275
No... Where does she think she...
389
00:15:42,015 --> 00:15:43,713
Angela.
390
00:15:44,844 --> 00:15:46,846
Hello.
391
00:15:46,933 --> 00:15:48,500
What is Museum Girl
- doing up here?
- I am not responsible for her.
392
00:15:48,674 --> 00:15:50,546
- She's here with your brother.
- She's just gonna accuse me
393
00:15:50,676 --> 00:15:52,417
- of being part of the patriarchy!
- You better make her leave.
394
00:15:52,548 --> 00:15:54,506
If we may begin?
395
00:15:54,637 --> 00:15:55,899
We may.
396
00:15:57,683 --> 00:15:58,945
Dearly beloved,
397
00:15:59,076 --> 00:16:00,556
we gather today to welcome
398
00:16:00,730 --> 00:16:03,515
a child of God into the fold.
399
00:16:03,646 --> 00:16:07,084
This child has been born
in baptism,
400
00:16:07,215 --> 00:16:09,782
and she is now called
a child of God.
401
00:16:09,956 --> 00:16:11,697
And so, indeed she is.
402
00:16:11,828 --> 00:16:13,699
The confirmation...
403
00:16:13,830 --> 00:16:15,571
My dear brothers and sisters,
404
00:16:15,658 --> 00:16:18,530
let us ask our Lord
to look lovingly on this child
405
00:16:18,617 --> 00:16:21,925
who is to baptized,
from her parents and godparents
406
00:16:22,099 --> 00:16:24,710
and on all the baptized.
407
00:16:24,797 --> 00:16:28,236
We look upon this baby
in wonder and love,
408
00:16:28,366 --> 00:16:30,542
but now I ask you to
look at one another.
409
00:16:30,673 --> 00:16:32,762
Because you all are examples
to this innocent soul.
410
00:16:32,892 --> 00:16:34,242
Yes, we are.
411
00:16:34,372 --> 00:16:36,374
This is the best day of my life.
412
00:16:36,548 --> 00:16:38,246
And let her remind us
of the joy
413
00:16:38,376 --> 00:16:41,336
we can feel when we look
past our petty differences
414
00:16:41,510 --> 00:16:43,903
and rejoice in Your glory.
415
00:16:47,255 --> 00:16:49,387
What?
416
00:16:59,223 --> 00:17:01,356
Gemma, I'm so sorry
I was a jerk.
417
00:17:01,443 --> 00:17:03,749
Life is too short
and it's too precious.
418
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:06,143
Ugh, it's totes presh.
419
00:17:08,711 --> 00:17:10,800
I'm sorry about
the "never" thing.
420
00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:13,933
Of all the people I could have
had an illegitimate baby with,
421
00:17:14,064 --> 00:17:16,371
I'm glad I did it with you.
422
00:17:16,545 --> 00:17:18,111
So am I.
423
00:17:18,242 --> 00:17:21,245
Will all of you assembled
here promise to guide Daphne
424
00:17:21,419 --> 00:17:24,988
to the path of righteousness,
purpose and prosperity?
425
00:17:25,075 --> 00:17:26,163
- Oh, yes.
- Yes, sir.
Yes, we will.
426
00:17:26,337 --> 00:17:28,513
Hundo P.
427
00:17:30,820 --> 00:17:33,649
Okay, people, if we can
all gather over here?
428
00:17:33,823 --> 00:17:34,867
Oh.
429
00:17:37,174 --> 00:17:38,697
You got her, baby?
430
00:17:40,699 --> 00:17:43,398
No. No.
431
00:17:45,095 --> 00:17:46,705
Angela cannot be
in this photo.
432
00:17:46,836 --> 00:17:50,143
The photo that's gonna be
over our fireplace forever?
433
00:17:50,274 --> 00:17:51,536
All right, let me
think, let me think.
434
00:17:51,667 --> 00:17:52,929
Okay, everybody!
435
00:17:53,059 --> 00:17:55,323
Tall people in the back.
436
00:17:55,453 --> 00:17:57,934
Angela, you stand
to the right over here.
437
00:17:58,021 --> 00:17:59,849
Okay, here we go.
438
00:17:59,979 --> 00:18:00,980
Okay, everyone, look right here.
439
00:18:01,111 --> 00:18:03,853
One, two, three.
440
00:18:04,767 --> 00:18:06,334
Looks great.
441
00:18:06,464 --> 00:18:08,684
Okay, we're gonna do another.
Okay, uh, g--
442
00:18:08,814 --> 00:18:09,641
well, hold on, hold on, hold on.
443
00:18:09,772 --> 00:18:11,208
Uh, Angela?
444
00:18:11,339 --> 00:18:12,818
- Yeah?
- Why don't we scooch you
445
00:18:12,949 --> 00:18:15,517
- right back here?
- Okay.
446
00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:21,174
Okay. One, two, three.
447
00:18:24,656 --> 00:18:26,571
You have got to be kidding me.
448
00:18:26,702 --> 00:18:28,834
- C-Can you give us a minute?
- Give us, give us a minute.
449
00:18:28,921 --> 00:18:30,575
Just give us a minute.
450
00:18:30,706 --> 00:18:34,057
You know what? It is time
to rip the Band-Aid off.
451
00:18:34,187 --> 00:18:35,537
-Yeah.
- Malcolm?
452
00:18:35,667 --> 00:18:37,800
Can I talk to you for
a minute over here?
453
00:18:37,930 --> 00:18:39,149
- Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, come on.
454
00:18:40,803 --> 00:18:42,457
Hey, sure thing. What's up, Pop?
455
00:18:42,587 --> 00:18:44,372
Hey, look, uh, Malcolm,
you know what?
456
00:18:44,546 --> 00:18:47,940
Your mother and I, we are
very, very, very proud of you.
457
00:18:48,114 --> 00:18:52,336
You have put in a lot
of good work on yourself,
458
00:18:52,467 --> 00:18:54,512
and it's just great to see you
459
00:18:54,686 --> 00:18:57,297
in a committed
relationship, you know?
460
00:18:57,428 --> 00:19:00,039
Oh. Thank you, Pop.
461
00:19:00,126 --> 00:19:03,042
But what the hell
are you doing?
462
00:19:03,913 --> 00:19:05,567
Excuse me?
463
00:19:05,697 --> 00:19:07,307
Look, I-I don't know
how to put this--
464
00:19:07,482 --> 00:19:08,961
there's no other
way to say it.
465
00:19:09,135 --> 00:19:10,963
I can't sugarcoat it,
I can't salt-pinch it--
466
00:19:11,137 --> 00:19:13,444
it's just that we
don't like Angela.
467
00:19:14,967 --> 00:19:16,055
Really?
468
00:19:16,186 --> 00:19:18,493
You... Mm-mm.
469
00:19:20,277 --> 00:19:20,843
Why?
470
00:19:21,017 --> 00:19:21,974
I mean, it's just...
471
00:19:22,105 --> 00:19:23,498
everything that she says
472
00:19:23,672 --> 00:19:25,195
and-and she does and...
473
00:19:25,325 --> 00:19:27,850
just pretty much her
whole personality.
474
00:19:27,980 --> 00:19:29,939
Wow.
475
00:19:30,026 --> 00:19:32,811
Look, I'm sorry, because I
know this is what you wanted,
476
00:19:32,942 --> 00:19:34,900
that you really,
really like her...
477
00:19:35,031 --> 00:19:36,249
No, I don't.
478
00:19:36,336 --> 00:19:37,686
I mean,
I thought I did at first,
479
00:19:37,816 --> 00:19:39,775
but once I got to know her...
480
00:19:39,905 --> 00:19:41,907
Ooh, she is awful.
481
00:19:43,431 --> 00:19:46,651
You know, I just thought it was
me finding excuses again, Pop.
482
00:19:46,782 --> 00:19:48,218
I've been trying
so hard to mature
483
00:19:48,392 --> 00:19:49,219
and hang in there
with Angela,
484
00:19:49,349 --> 00:19:51,351
even though things
aren't perfect.
485
00:19:51,439 --> 00:19:53,136
You know, I just want
what you and Mama have.
486
00:19:53,266 --> 00:19:55,181
And you'll have it, son.
487
00:19:55,312 --> 00:19:56,705
With somebody else, though.
488
00:19:58,968 --> 00:20:00,404
Anybody else.
489
00:20:01,405 --> 00:20:03,625
Look-- ugh, Malcolm, I'm sorry,
490
00:20:03,755 --> 00:20:07,019
I guess I'm partly responsible
why Angela is here.
491
00:20:07,106 --> 00:20:08,543
Partly?
492
00:20:10,109 --> 00:20:12,329
It's okay, Mama.
493
00:20:12,460 --> 00:20:14,766
- I guess I know what I got to do.
- All right?
494
00:20:14,897 --> 00:20:17,552
Do it, and then get rid
of that damn scarf
495
00:20:17,639 --> 00:20:19,554
so we can take this
family picture.
496
00:20:20,337 --> 00:20:21,251
I'm on it.
497
00:20:21,338 --> 00:20:23,296
Hey, Angela? Hey.
498
00:20:23,427 --> 00:20:24,733
Can we talk outside
for a minute?
499
00:20:24,863 --> 00:20:26,169
Please.
500
00:20:26,343 --> 00:20:28,214
Smells like mold in here.
501
00:20:30,565 --> 00:20:32,218
Hold this.
502
00:20:34,003 --> 00:20:35,439
You know what?
503
00:20:35,570 --> 00:20:36,919
I think I'm gonna
go out there, too.
504
00:20:37,006 --> 00:20:38,877
I just need to talk to Angela.
505
00:20:39,008 --> 00:20:40,357
Just some things
that I need to say
506
00:20:40,488 --> 00:20:41,663
that I can't say
in this damn church.
507
00:20:41,793 --> 00:20:43,055
No, Tina. No, no, Tina, no.
508
00:20:43,186 --> 00:20:45,841
No, no, no.
Tina, don't you try. Hey.
509
00:20:45,928 --> 00:20:46,972
I need a press.
I need a full press right here.
510
00:20:50,585 --> 00:20:52,630
Moth...
511
00:20:54,284 --> 00:20:55,546
Ugh, get her.
512
00:20:55,633 --> 00:20:57,592
- Get her!
- Put me down!
513
00:21:02,510 --> 00:21:05,251
Captioning sponsored by
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514
00:21:05,338 --> 00:21:08,211
and TOYOTA.
515
00:21:08,385 --> 00:21:11,606
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