Original subtitles

[Hawaiian music]

*

[bubbles popping]

[carnival music]

[indistinct chatter]

[munching]

- Mm, mm, mm.

- Gah, gah, gah.

- Mmm! Isn't this salt water taffy

just taffilicious?

- And stickerific!

[both munching]

[guitar tones]

[laughs]

- Blah.

[barking]

[chewing efforts]

Eh, eh. [hums]

[chewing efforts]

- Blah!

Ah! [bell dings]

[swallows, chews]

[straining, yells] [alarm blares]

- What's the matter, Patrick?

- I have a headache inside of my tooth.

- Maybe you should do something about that.

- Okay, I will.

[snapping, yelping]

- How does that help?

- Well, now that my all-over hurts,

I'm not thinking about my mouth.

[throbbing] Ow!

I guess it didn't work. [yells]

[snapping] - Oh! Oh!

- Huh? - [whimpering]

Whoa! That's it!

I'm taking you to the dentist, Patrick.

- No way! I've heard horror stories.

- Oh, don't worry, Patrick.

Dentists are our friends.

Huh? Patrick?

Patrick?

Oh.

[cash register dings]

Yah! [crashing]

[giggles] - And we have a winner.

- [excitedly panting]

Thank you. - Aw, darn it.

[bubbles popping] [breathing]

Oh, boy! Aren't dentists' offices fun?

[gasps] Oh, they've got colorful, wooden beads on wires!

Mm! Ah. Whoa! Look at it go!

- Slow down, SpongeBob!

This place is scary enough without you

going crazy with the beads!

[dramatic music] [whimpering]

[maniacal laughter]

[whimpers]

[boing] Oh!

[panting] Ahh!

- [giggles]

- And that was The Incidentals, with a startling number

called "Dramatic Music Stings."

Comin' up, here's The Spookers

with a haunting little tune called "Ominous."

- Patrick Star?

We're ready for you now.

[ominous music]

- [whines]

- Aw, come on, Patrick! - No!

- The doctor will fix you right up.

- Sit here, please.

Dr. Mundane will be right with you.

- Ahh! [teeth chattering]

*

- Agnes, please turn down that radio.

[music stops]

I'm Dr. Beige Mundane.

You must be Patrick Star.

What seems to be the problem?

- No problem. I was just leaving.

- [grunts] No, Patrick! Sit!

[water spraying] - [blubbering]

- Good boy.

Ow!

[laughs]

- Let's take a look in your mouth.

Open wide please.

[ship horn blares]

- Mm-hmm. I see the problem.

- [struggling] - Your friend here

still has a baby tooth.

- Ooh, I wanna see! - [gulps]

[gagging] [bats chirping]

[snoring] - Aw!

Coochie coo! - [crying]

[grunts]

- [laughs]

- I still have a baby tooth?

- Yes, and the pain is coming from

your adult tooth trying to push your baby tooth out of the way.

[straining]

- [gasps] That's not right!

- It's the natural way of things.

If you want the pain to go away,

then I need to extract the tooth.

- You leave my baby tooth alone, you monster!

Zoom! - Patrick, come back!

Oh!

Oh, oh, eh, eh.

- Nobody is going to tell me

what to do with my baby tooth.

This tooth is stayin' in my mouth!

- Okay, Patrick, but that means

your tooth won't be going to Tooth Island.

- Tooth Island? - Yeah, Tooth Island!

It's where the Tooth Fairy takes all the baby teeth

that are left under pillows.

Tooth island is a wonderful place,

where teeth can be free.

They can soak in the Calcium Pools all day

or sleep in the comfort of the Pink Gum Trees.

They get to swing on Floss Vines

and never, ever have to worry about cavities.

[all beckoning]

Of course, I guess your baby tooth

could be happy in your mouth,

all alone, by itself.

- [wailing]

- I don't care, SpongeBob.

I know what's best for my tooth.

I can make it happy.

[bubbles popping]

[crying]

- [moaning]

Ahh. - [crying]

* Rock-a-bye, baby, on the tree top *

[crying continues]

[keys jingling] - Ah.

- [humming]

- [laughs]

- [laughs] Oops.

[boink] - [cries]

[bubbles popping]

[bites, chews]

- Oh!

Ohh!

[horn blares] [screams]

[pained grunt] Ow!

- Hmm. My friendship sense is tingling.

Patrick must be in trouble!

- Oh. Ooh!

- What's the matter, pal? - Nothing! Just, uh--

Practicing being a seal. [laughs]

[imitates seal barking]

- Hm!

- [barking] Ow!

- Patrick, Dr. Mundane always says,

"If you can't bite, things ain't right."

- Okay, SpongeBob. I guess I have to

get my tooth to the Tooth Fairy.

- Ha, you rube. There is no such thing

as the Tooth Fairy. - Ah!

Squidward! - It's all a bunch of

made up baloney.

- It is not baloney!

- It is baloney! - Who's got baloney?

- [sighs] There is no baloney!

Just like there is no Tooth Fairy.

In fact, if you could prove there were

a Tooth Fairy, I would eat, oh--

a bucket of chum!

both: Ew!

- Squidward, why would you want to do that?

- I said I would, only if there was

a Tooth Fairy, and since there isn't a Tooth Fairy,

I will never have to eat a bucket of chum.

- Patrick, I've been your friend

for a long time.

I would never lie to you.

You need Dr. Mundane's help so you can

get your tooth to the Tooth Fairy.

- That's okay, SpongeBob. I think I can manage.

Hmm, yah!

[humming]

[blender whirrs]

[snorts]

Ahh.

[splat] [cries]

- Ahh! [alarm bell ringing]

[grunts] - You see, Patrick,

we have got to get that tooth out.

- You'll have to catch me first!

Oh! - Patrick, wait!

- Ha ha, Tooth Fairy.

What a couple of molar morons.

[crashing] Ow!

[panting, screaming]

[growling, howling] [instrumental country music]

- [gasps] The worms. Oh, oh, no!

[barking, growling]

[panting]

Oh!

[growling] [fence rattles]

[panting]

[growling]

[blows] [splashing]

[slurping]

[barking]

[spits]

[screams] [thud]

[groans]

Not wanted.

That fixes it.

[barking] [whimpers]

[growling]

Oh.

[whimpering]

[jaws snapping]

Ahh.

[barking]

- Mipsey, Pipsey, you bad girls!

You get back on this leash.

[whining]

- Well, you may have called off your worms,

but I'm not coming down. - Patrick, they weren't mine.

- A likely story. - [sighs]

Patrick, can I show you something?

[grunting]

- What's that? - It's a scrap book

of all my baby teeth.

Heh, that was a good one.

I remember every tooth.

Even though they're no longer in my mouth,

I still keep the memory of them in my heart.

- [laughs] I thought you kept them in the scrapbook.

- Patrick, don't you think your baby tooth

wants to see all his old friends on Tooth Island?

- Don't listen to him!

I still have all my baby teeth, and look at me!

Ahh! [maniacal laughter]

[both exclaim]

- Okay, SpongeBob, we can go.

[bubbles popping]

[mechanical whirring, squeaking]

I'm ready, Doc. Do what you have to do.

Ahh. [yanking]

- I'm done.

- That's it? - That's it.

- Aw.

Aw, you're going under my pillow

so you can go to Tooth Island, my sweet boy.

[bubbles popping]

[snoring]

[grunts, gasps]

SpongeBob? - Ha! I was right!

The Tooth Fairy isn't real.

- Oh, SpongeBob.

- Patrick, you don't understand!

I'm just helping to get your tooth

to the Tooth Fairy. - Oh, that's a good one.

- It's true! - How can I believe you?

Oh, the lies! The chicanery! [sobs]

- [laughs]

Look at how betrayed Patrick feels!

Oh, this was totally worth staying up all night.

- You don't believe there's a Tooth Fairy?

Well, follow me and I'll show ya.

Behold, the Tooth Ferry!

[ship horn blares]

This is where parents and friends

take teeth so they can be ferried to Tooth Island.

- There really is a Tooth Ferry!

- Of course.

- Hm--wha!

- All aboard!

[all cheering]

- Uh, uh, oh.

Uh-huh, hello!

- [restrained crying]

[horn blares] [cheering]

[blows nose]

- Oh, here. This is yours.

- Could you wait till I'm asleep

and put it under my pillow?

- Mm, sure Patrick. Anything for a pal.

[cash register dings] - Hey! Where do you think

you're going, chum chewer?

- [groans] Ah! Hey, come on!

This is just a big misunderstanding!

Ferry, fairy: They're two different words

that just happen to sound alike!

- Open wide, Squidward! - No.

[teeth screaming]

[panicked yelling] [horn blares]