Original subtitles

- Are you ready, kids?

all: Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

all: Aye, aye, Captain!

- * Ohh...

* Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * Absorbent and yellow and porous is he *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * If nautical nonsense be something you wish *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants! - Ready?

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

- SpongeBob

SquarePants!

[laughing]

*

[waves crashing]

[Hawaiian music]

*

[bubbles popping]

- [inhales, exhales]

[door opens] - Rev your excitement engines,

Mr. Squidward. [grunts]

Do ye not know what tomorrow is?

- Another monotonous day I spend walking

in slow motion toward an empty horizon?

- No, that's today. Tomorrow is Food Con!

- Whoa! Food Con!

Wait, what's a Food Con?

- Additionally, who cares?

- Mr. Squidward, Food Con is the biggest convention

of food fans in the entire ocean.

The best chefs and cooks gather together and compete

for the top prize, the golden cornucopia!

- Oh boy! The Krabby Patty is

a sure bet to win the golden corn-ocobbia!

- You're darn tootin' it is!

And you two will be me right-claw men!

Eh, I could use some extra muscle, though,

to help set up the booth.

Hmm. - [grunting]

[strains, grunts]

[chews]

- Perfect.

Let's hit the road!

[bubbles pop]

As you can see gentlemen, I have spared no expense

on our transportation.

[all exclaim]

[tires screech]

- Tada!

- Whoo! - Oh, what a ride!

- Oh.

- And I brought plenty of free samples to sell.

- This is the best day ever!

both: Road trip! [electric guitars wail]

[punches] [coughs]

- Mm.

[bubbles pop]

[laughter]

- I spy with my little eye-- - Mr. Krabs!

- Yes! - [giggles]

I spy with my little eye-- - Mr. Krabs!

- Oh ho! Yes, yes! - I spy with my little eye--

- Mr. Krabs? - Oh! How did you know?

- Enough!

Ye both are barnacles on me brain!

both: Whoa look at that!

- The World's Second Biggest Lump

is only 50 miles away, we gotta see it!

both: No.

- The World's Least Exciting Sweater!

My parents fell in love there! We gotta go!

both: Cool toilet! [flushing]

both: No. - We are not stopping

till we get to Food Con!

[bubbles pop]

- Hey!

[horn blares] [screams]

- Hey!

[moans, snores] [truck horn honks]

[babbling, growls]

For the last time, we get it!

Trucks have horns!

- Come on Squidward. Give it a try!

If I do, will you promise to stop?

both: Yes!

- All right. Hey!

[machinery moving, liquid bubbles]

[horn honks]

Typical. - You did it wrong, Squidward.

- I did it exactly the way you did it!

- Everybody pipe down!

I don't want to hear another peep from anyone

until we get to Food Con!

- Peep. - Not a peep!

- Peep! - Not. A. Peep!

- Peep!

all: Peep's Cliff!

[screaming]

[splashing] [screaming]

[splashing]

[yelling]

[screaming]

[crashing]

[all sigh]

[clanging]

[airbag deploys]

- [moans] - Mr. Krabs?

Blink if you're alive.

[moans]

- Oh, thank Neptune we're all okay.

- Well, at least we have plenty of food

while we're stuck out here.

Ahh! - [burps, moans]

It was an accident!

They fell into my mouth. [moans]

[all scream]

[panicked noises] Don't worry, guys!

We can still win Food Con.

There's one patty left.

- We gotta get moving, the judging starts tomorrow!

Now since you boys caused the accident,

you'll be haulin' the trailer.

both: Yeah! Hauling the trailer!

[wobbling, struggling]

[crashing] [bubbles pop]

male narrator: And so, SpongeBob and Patrick

begin their harrowing task.

Tethered to the wagon not just by ropes,

but by their own foolish mistakes.

Onward they trudge.

[growling]

Pushed by Mr. Krabs,

whose desires blind him to the pain he inflicts.

In short, this whole trip is beginning to look

like a whoopsie!

- [wobbling, straining] Ay.

Patrick, are you okay? [yells, farts]

- 100%. [stretching]

[pops] Uh.

- Mr. Krabs, we've got to stop for the night

if you want Spongebob and Patrick to live.

I'm not saying that's what I want,

I'm just telling you the facts.

[bubbles pop]

[spooky music] [owl hoots]

[forest noises]

[shivering, whimpering]

[howling] [startled noises]

- We must guard this last patty

with our very lives.

It's the only way to win Food Con,

and who knows what scary, hungry things

are out there in the woods, waiting to gobble it up!

[growling]

Positions, everyone.

[claws snapping, growling]

[startled noises] [growling]

[all whimper]

[meowing]

- Aw, hey little fella.

[dramatic music] [snarling]

[growls]

[all scream]

[snarls]

all: The patty!

[panting] - Oh, what are we gonna do!

- Don't eat my patty!

[grunts] Yah! - [screams]

Whoa! [yells]

[inhales, munches]

[spits, groans]

[screaming, thud] - Oh!

- Squidward! You saved the Krabby Patty!

- Whoopee. [bubbles pop]

[stomach rumbles]

[moans]

- Mm. [door creaks]

[fluttering]

[angelic glowing]

Maybe I could just eat a pickle.

- Maybe I could just eat the corner of the lettuce.

- I don't want to be a hog.

I'll just eat what's left over.

- No! We can't do that!

I know we're all hungry, but we must stay focused.

Remember Food Con! Remember the cornucopia!

- He says Food Con, but all I hear is food.

[bubbles pop]

[fire burns out]

- Hey, SpongeBob, you look tired.

You want me to guard the patty for a bit?

- [yawns] Thanks, Patrick. That'd be great.

- [laughs] - [snores]

[glass shattering]

- Ah-- - Patrick, no!

- I can't believe you thought I would eat it.

- Patrick I'm sorry I doubted you.

I'm just hungry and tired and I feel like

I'm all alone doing the right thing

and I want that- [growling, slobbering]

Hey! Hey! - But I'm hungry!

- Yah! - Oh! [laughs]

[bubbles pop]

- I'll lull him to sleep with a lovely lullaby.

- Ooh, good idea.

Music soothes the savage beast.

[plays clarinet] What the!

[screaming]

- Did I say soothes? I guess I meant enrages.

[screams]

[thud] [babbles]

[honks, snaps]

- Everybody's a critic.

[bubbles pop]

- Hey there, boyo. - [screams]

- I've taken the liberty of creating a safe

to secure our precious patty.

- Great idea, Mr. Krabs!

- Just put it right in here.

I'll even step away while you do it.

Ahh.

- Pew, smells really bad in there.

- Okay, just do it already! - [gasps]

No! - Enough of this.

I am your boss,

and I order you to give me that patty!

- No, Mr. Krabs, I will not.

But I will give you these.

[bell dings] Nature patties!

- Oh, boy! - Oh, delightful!

- Dig in, boys!

[all munch]

[chewing, struggling]

- Oh, it's like eating the inside of a lawn mower.

- I think mine is mostly stones.

- Out here we call them forest tomatoes.

[both spit]

[chews, moans] [gulps]

- Enough of this! - Mr. Krabs, remember Food Con!

- You can't win Food Con if you've starved to death!

Now, give me that Krabby Patty, boyo.

- No! I'm doing this for your own good.

I'm protecting you all from yourselves!

- Well, in that case, you leave me no choice.

Get him!

[screams] [all yelling]

[panicked noises]

- Whoa! [grunts]

[yelling]

[panting]

[stomach rumbles]

- Hey, psst. It's me, the Patty.

- Oh, hi.

- It's just me and you out here now.

So, just do it. Eat me.

- What about Food Con?

- Oh, forget Food Con.

You're starving, and I'm right here.

[slurps] - Maybe you're right.

- Of course I'm right, I'm a talking sandwich.

- Yes, a sandwich has no reason to lie.

Ahh. [dramatic music]

[gasps] No! I made a vow.

I will not eat you.

- Shh, shh, I can hear him over there.

He's arguing with the patty.

Let's get him! [grunts] - [moans]

[grunting, thud]

- Oh! [thud, farts]

- [hums] - Don't let him get away!

- Hungry!

[panting]

[yells, whimpers]

Food Con!

[crowd chattering]

- I'm filled with meat. I love being filled with meat.

- Ahh - Get him!

- Guys, we're here!

- Hungry, hungry, hungry!

- You don't have to eat the patty.

[grumbling]

[thudding] - And I hereby award

the golden cornucopia to--

[straining, yells]

- Please, try a delicious Krabby Patty!

- What's this? A late entry?

Hmm.

[bell dings]

- [in slow motion] Nature patty!

- [slow-motion] Mmm, Krabby Patty.

Ahh, um! [chews]

[whimpers, gasps]

[munches, chewing]

- Mmm, this is the most complex,

mmm, organic, mmm, irresistible flavor

I have ever had the pleasure of tasting!

[munches] - Ohh--

The winner is...

Mmm, the Krabby Patty!

- Oh, excuse me, sir, that's not the real Krabby--

- Quit your truthing, boy.

We won. [cheers and applause]

- The Krabby Patty won! It won!

- Yes. [munches]

[machinery moving, horn honks]

Oh.