Original subtitles

- Are you ready, kids?

all: Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

all: Aye, aye, Captain!

- * Ohh...

* Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * Absorbent and yellow and porous is he *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * If nautical nonsense be something you wish *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants!

- * Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish *

all: SpongeBob SquarePants! - Ready?

all: SpongeBob SquarePants

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob

SquarePants!

[laughing]

[flute trills]*

[waves crashing]

[lilting ukulele music]

*

[bubbling]

- "Sure is a nice day for a picnic."

"Oh, Herb, it's like a second honeymoon."

"Just look at Timmy and Sally

throwing the ol' disc around."

"Come on and throw it, sis."

"I just want to say, I'm gonna be real sad

when you go off to college."

"Oh, Sally, don't be such a goof!

You know I'll always be your big brother."

"Is it starting to rain?"

"Nothing can spoil this perfect day."

"What's the matter, big brother?

Got something in your eye?"

"Yeah, that's it. That must be it."

"Ha, ha, now who's the goof?

"Just watch out because here it comes.

Yay!"

- Oh, what now?

Too much whee-ing.

What is--Oh! Pickle juice!

Oh, my eye!

[sizzles]

[screams]

- I smell something burning.

- Yeah, probably my eye.

- Oh, stop your drama, Squidward.

- You missed a spot.

*

- What in the name of Neptune's tail fin

is going on in here, boy?

- Oh, I'm playing picnic with my wonderful

little food friends, Herb and Loretta.

These are their kids, Timmy and Sally.

- Mm-hmm.

Sounds to me like yer just

wasting me precious ingredients.

Listen, SpongeBob, just 'cause there's no

customers doesn't mean you can't do something productive.

- Like what, Mr. Krabs?

- Well, I mean, you could--

Oh, you could dust the pickles.

Could, um, alphabetize the buns.

Uh, you could, uh, water down the ketchup!

- At this point, it would be ketchuping up the water.

- Whatever.

Now if these little fellers could work,

maybe you'd be onto something.

Hey, you couldn't make me a tiny little army

of unpaid workers, could you?

- Oh, I could try.

Here's a little worker.

We'll call him Pete.

- [chuckles] Hi, Pete!

Hey, what's wrong with Pete?

He's not working.

- Maybe Pete is just tired.

- Well, now, that shouldn't interfere with Pete's work.

- Well, I don't know, Mr. Krabs.

I guess it might affect his productivity.

- [gasps] No, not his productivity!

- Hey, maybe if Pete could go on a picnic

like the Patty family, he might be rested

and happy and more productive than ever!

- [gasps] No.

Not leaving the workplace for pleasure!

- Hey! Maybe Pete's boss could have a company picnic

and Pete would have a great time and relax

and come back and work twice as hard.

- Company picnic?

- See, look! He's already perking up.

- Gee, SpongeBob, do you think if I threw a picnic,

your productivity would increase?

- Definitely! - What's going on in here?

- Just in time, Mr. Squidward.

You're about to go on the greatest

company picnic ever!

[chuckles] - Yeah!

- A company picnic, eh?

That gives me an idea. [chuckles]

[jellyfish buzzing]

- This is the greatest company picnic ever?

- Yes. Yes, it is.

- Pace yourself, Squidward.

The fun is just getting started.

- Is this toilet paper we're sitting on?

- Oh, don't think of it as just toilet paper.

It has thousands of uses.

- Here's one!

- Well, I guess things will pick up

once the food gets here.

- Right, you are!

Here's the food!

- What?

- Oh, you're confused.

Let me show you a little hack.

See, you open it with your teeth.

There, isn't that fun?

And afterwards, you can toss it around like, uh--

You know, one of those things you toss around.

Here, let me show you.

Go out for a long one, SpongeBob.

- Going long!

- Oh, this is so much fun.

- [echoing] Is this far enough?

- I can't hear what you're saying.

So...

Here it comes!

- Agh!

- Hmm.

Heh, I don't see it anywhere.

- I'm going home.

- Oh, no, you're not.

You're going to sit right there and enjoy yourself

until your productivity increases.

- [grumbles]

- Oh, boy! Face painting!

Great idea, Mr. Krabs.

[slurps] Ah.

Here, let me try.

Uh-huh...

Hi, I'm Barnacle Boy!

[both laughing]

- Well, we sure had our fun and games today.

But just maybe, we've learned a little something too

about each other and ourselves.

I guess you'd have to say this was the greatest...

- Do not say it. - The greatest compa--

- Don't!

- The greatest company picnic ever!

[record scratches]

[techno music]

Well, looks like we've got company.

- Well, Mr. Krabs, it is a company picnic.

[chuckles]

- Well, this is more like it.

You've been holding out on us, Mr. Krabs, you old devil.

- I have?

Oh, yeah, hmm...

*

- "Chumpany Picnic"?

That's not how you spell "company picnic"!

[horn honks] - Guess who?

- Plankton.

- [grunts]

- Just what do you think you're doing, Plankton?

- Uh, what do you mean?

I'm having my company picnic.

This is our spot.

- Oh, yeah?

Well, it's my spot now.

- Come now, can't we all just share?

Nothing should spoil this perfect day.

- Aw...

- You don't even have any employees.

- Aw... - Sure, I do.

Those are my new hires, Simmy and Tally.

Just look at them tossing the disc around.

[metal clanging]

- A real disc?

- Ha, go on, SpongeBob.

Show this upstart how we chuck the old

mustard plate around.

- Well, eh...

- You're all welcome to join us, of course.

There's plenty of fun for all!

- Uh, no thanks, Plankton.

We're having a great time at our own company picnic.

- [grumbling]

- Hey, Plankton, what are Simmy and Tally up to?

- Oh, just setting up the rest of the activities:

the cotton candy machine,

hot roasted peanuts,

games of chance,

bottles you can knock over to win a prize,

the world's most exciting roller coaster,

a deep fryer for delicacies...

- Delicacies?

- And of course, the dunking booth!

[electric crackling] [explosion booms]

Uh, have you seen the calliope?

[calliope music plays]

- Aw...

- Now look here, Plankton.

Me loyal employees would never be taken in

by such a shallow display of--

- One side, chubby!

- [yelling]

[gasps]

- [chewing sounds]

- Yum...

- [grunting]

Is this backwards?

No, that's not it either.

- You were saying, Krabs?

- Mr. Krabs is right, Plankton.

We're having lots of fun. Come on, Mr. Krabs.

- SpongeBob, would you mind helping me with my zipper?

*

- Whoo-hoo-hoo! Ha, ha!

- Who needs them, right, Mr. Krabs?

- Huh? Yeah, yeah, sure.

- Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! [laughing]

- Do you want me to paint your face?

- Well, I don't know--

- All right.

I'm making you into, um, a ghost.

- Ooh, I think this mayo has gone bad.

- Ooh, the ghost of mayonnaise bad!

That really scares people.

- Yeah. [laughs weakly]

- Whoa. Stop.

That is almost too much cotton candy.

[electric crackling]

[explosion booms]

- You want to join in all that fun over there

with Mr. Squidward, don't you?

- No, of course not.

- Are you sure you don't want to?

- Mr. Krabs, I am staying right here

at the Krusty Krab picnic!

- You sure? - 100% sure, Mr. Krabs!

- Okay, then. I'm out of here!

See ya! Yahoo!

[laughing]

I win!

*

You can never have too many!

Hey, Squiddy-bird!

- Whoo...

Having lots of fun over here.

I've got a plate...

that's made of paper.

[both laughing]

It's a paper plate. Whoo.

[both laughing]

Well, if it's good enough for Mr. Krabs,

it's good enough for me.

[both laughing]

- I have to say, Mr. Plankton, if this is how

you treat your employees--

- Say no more, my friend.

If you'd care to work for me, just sign this contract

with this delicious candy pen.

- Ooh, me first! Me first!

- Oh, don't bother to read it, not on such a fun day.

- That's such great advice!

- [slurping noises]

- This is working far better than I planned.

With Krabs as my employee, I can order him

to give me the Krabby Patty formula,

and the Krusty Krab will be no more.

[evil cackling]

- [clears throat] Hello, Plankton.

- Uh-oh.

- Mr. Krabs, don't sign it!

[yells]

- My candy pen!

- [slow motion] Simmy, look out!

There's a candy pen headed straight for your eye

due to my act of swatting it away without first

considering the trajectory.

Oh, I wish I could get my words out faster, but everything

is in slow motion.

[yells] No!

*

[gasps]

Simmy and Tally are holograms?

Then that means...

- I was riding that?

What about those delicacies I was eating?

[yelling]

- [gasps]

Phew, that was a close--

Ah!

You saved me, boy.

How did you do it?

- I guess my mind was all sharp from the relaxing fun

I had at your company picnic, Mr. Krabs.

- Unbelievable!

Uh-oh...

[screaming]

[explosion booms]

- The greatest company picnic ever!

- All right, enough relaxing, back to work.

[chuckles]

[upbeat maritime music]