Original subtitles

**

[engine humming]

- ONCE AROUND THE ROUNDABOUT.

[tires screech]

LEFT AT THE WALL.

[tires screech]

OVER THE "BUMP OF TRUTH."

AND, FINALLY, THE FLAMING HOOP!

[tires screech]

[tires screech]

THANK YOU, MRS. PUFF.

I AM NOW A CARD-CARRYING DRIVER

AND A PRODUCTIVE MEMBER OF SOCIETY.

WHOO-HOO! YEAH!

- OH, NOTHING GIVES ME MORE JOY THAN TEACHING.

I CAN'T WAIT TO PASS MY NEXT STUDENT.

- HELLO, MRS. PUFF!

I'M ALL SET FOR MY DRIVING TEST.

[shivering with fear]

MRS. PUFF, YOU OKAY?

- JUST START DRIVING.

[tires squealing]

- TURN THIS BOAT AROUND IMMEDIATELY!

- RIGHT AWAY, MA'AM.

[tires screeching]

DON'T WORRY, MRS. PUFF. I HAVE THIS UNDER CONTROL.

[grunts] UH...

[tires screeching]

[monkeys screeching] - NEXT UP...

GOIN' BANANAS 3 IN 3-D.

- HEY, DUDE. PASS THE 3-D GLASSES.

THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE, LIKE, IN 3-D.

- [chuckles] OH, YEAH, RIGHT.

- HERE I AM.

I'M COMING AT YOU...

[tires squeal] LIKE YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE.

[laugh evilly]

[Hawaiian ukulele music]

[laughter]

- I THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY

YOU HAVE ONCE AGAIN FAILED YOUR DRIVING TEST!

[laughter]

- UH, BUT, MRS. PUFF, I-- - NO BUTS, SPONGEBOB!

YOU'VE FAILED THIS TEST OVER AND OVER.

I'M BEGINNING TO BELIEVE YOU'RE SIMPLY...

UNTEACHABLE.

[laughter]

NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!

- AHH! GYEE! GYAH!

I'M SORRY, MRS. PUFF!

[sobbing] - [growling]

both: DUDE!

- THIS IS, LIKE, THE GNARLIEST 3-D MOVIE EVER.

[grunts]

[laughter]

IF ONLY SPONGEBOB COULD PASS HIS BOATING TEST,

HE'D BE OUT OF MY LIFE ONCE AND FOR ALL.

UNFORTUNATELY, I KEEP GETTING REMINDED

OF THE CONSEQUENCES

IF I GET TOO ANGRY WITH THE LITTLE NUISANCE.

I CAN'T EVEN LEAVE TOWN WITHOUT VIOLATING MY PAROLE.

OH!

IF THERE WAS ONLY SOME WAY THAT I DIDN'T HAVE TO LIVE IN FEAR.

FEAR--

THAT'S THE ANSWER.

SPONGEBOB IS AFRAID OF THE DRIVING COURSE.

SO IT WOULD STAND TO REASON

THAT IF HE TOOK THE DRIVING TEST

SOMEWHERE BESIDES THE DRIVING COURSE,

HE WOULD PASS!

OF COURSE!

THE ANSWER'S BEEN IN FRONT OF ME ALL ALONG.

I'LL TEST SPONGEBOB ON A REAL ROAD,

AND THEN HE'LL BE OUT OF MY LIFE FOREVER!

[laughs]

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

- [groans]

- [meows]

- NOT NOW, GARY.

CAN'T YOU SEE I'M WALLOWING IN MY OWN FILTH?

[groans]

[knock on door]

COME BACK LATER. I'M WALLOWING.

[knock on door]

[groans]

[door hinge squeaks]

- GOOD MORNING, SPONGEBOB.

- [gasps]

- SPONGEBOB?

SPONGEBOB? - [coughs]

- SPONGEBOB.

- I'M SORRY MRS. PUFF.

I AM TRYING TO STAY OUT OF YOUR SIGHT.

- [laughs] OH, THAT.

LET'S FORGET WHAT I SAID.

IT'S TIME TO TAKE A FRESH APPROACH.

- MRS. PUFF, I-- YOU SAID--

DON'T YOU REMEMBER?

I'M A--

- WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS, SPONGEBOB.

WE HAVE A LONG DAY OF DRIVING AHEAD OF US.

[tense string orchestra music]

[crow-like cawing]

- MRS. PUFF, WHY HAVE YOU TAKEN ME

TO THIS RATHER REMOTE AND SLIGHTLY SCARY LANDSCAPE?

- TO OVERCOME YOUR FEARS, SILLY.

- [groans] [bones jingle]

- IT'S NOT WORKING.

- HERE WE ARE.

- UH, WHERE ARE WE?

THIS OLD ABANDONED ROAD IS THE PERFECT VENUE

FOR YOUR DRIVING TEST.

- DRIVING TEST?

- THAT'S RIGHT.

NOW YOU'RE FREE FROM ALL THE DISTRACTING OBSTACLES

ON THE BOATING COURSE.

[tires screech] OUT HERE,

THERE'S NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

NOW SCOOCH OVER.

COME ON, SCOOCH OVER.

- BUT, MRS. PUFF, WHAT ABOUT THE FACT

THAT I'M UNTEACHABLE? [seat belt clicks]

- FORGET ALL ABOUT THAT.

OUT HERE YOU COULD TEACH A HERMIT CRAB TO BOAT.

- MRS. PUFF, I'M STILL INTIMIDATED.

- LISTEN, IF YOU'RE NERVOUS ABOUT BOATING,

SIMPLY REPEAT THE WORDS "FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD."

GOT IT? - OH, OKAY.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

[gulps]

FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

HEY, LOOK AT ME...

ALL NOT CRASHING AND STUFF.

WONDERFUL!

KEEP THAT UP,

AND I'LL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO PASS YOU.

JUST REPEAT YOUR MANTRA.

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD-- THE OPEN, UNINTIMIDATING ROAD.

- BOATING WITHIN THE LINES--

WELL DONE.

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD. [tires screech]

- FINALLY USING YOUR TURN SIGNAL.

[laughs] CHECK.

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD. [tires screech]

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

- ROUNDABOUT NAVIGATION-- CHECK.

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

[engine revs]

- SAFE AND STEADY ACCELERATION.

CHECK!

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

[tires screeching]

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

[engine revs]

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

[tires screech]

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

[tires screech]

[echoing] THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD.

THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

- CHECK, CHECK, AND CHECK!

[sighs]

WHAT IS THIS?

ONLY ONE MORE TEST.

AND IT'S THE EASIEST ONE YET.

SPONGEBOB, ALL YOU HAVE TO DO

IS SAFELY DOCK THIS VESSEL.

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD.

FOCUS ON THE... ROAD?

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ROAD?

- CALM DOWN, SPONGEBOB!

LISTEN! ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SAFELY STOP THIS VESSEL!

- FOCUS ON THE ROAD! THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE ROAD!

- JUST STOP THE BOAT!

- FOCUS ON THE-- DA-DA-DA--

THE ROAD!

- SPONGEBOB, WAIT! [tires screech]

SPONGEBOB!

- THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE, MRS. PUFF.

BUT I AM BACK ON THE ROAD AND READY TO FOCUS UPON IT.

- SPONGEBOB, THIS ISN'T JUST ANY ROAD.

[truck horn honks]

IT'S A TEN-LANE INTERTIDAL SEAWAY!

[truck horn honks] - SUPER-TIDAL INTER--HUH?

- STAY CALM, SPONGEBOB.

SPONGEBOB. SPONGEBOB!

SPONGEBOB!

REMEMBER YOUR MANTRA! - RIGHT.

FOCUS ON THE ROAD. THERE IS NOTHING BUT THE--

[truck horn honks] I CAN'T EVEN SEE THE ROAD!

[teeth chattering] - SPONGEBOB!

[tires screeching]

GIVE ME THE WHEEL, SPONGEBOB.

OH, DEAR.

HE'S COMPLETELY FROZEN UP!

[truck horn blaring] [grunts]

FIDDLESTICKS!

[groans]

[truck horn blaring]

NO-HO-HO! [tires screeching]

- RECKLESS DRIVERS.

I LOATHE RECKLESS DRIVERS.

[indistinct police radio transmission]

[engine turning, revs]

PULL OVER, YOU MENACE.

- [screams]

[police siren wailing]

UH, MRS. PUFF, CAN I HAVE MY ARMS BACK?

- I SAID STOP YOUR VESSEL! - OOH!

- SORRY, MR. OFFICER, SIR!

I'M APPLYING THE BRAKES!

[engine revs] OH!

- AH, WE'VE GOT US A RUNNER. [engine revs]

- PULL OVER, SPONGEBOB!

AND MAKE IT QUICK.

LOOK!

- [screams]

[tires screech] - NO!

[crash]

OH!

[tires screeching] WHOA!

[tires screeching]

[shrieks]

[tires screeching] SPONGEBOB!

HIT THE BRAKES!

- HUH? OH! OKAY.

[tires screeching]

- GOODNESS GRACIOUS.

THERE ISN'T A SCRATCH ON THIS VESSEL.

SPONGEBOB, THE TEST IS HISTORY.

YOU--YOU'VE PASSED!

HERE'S YOUR LICENSE!

AND I'M FREE! [engine humming]

HA HA!

[tires screech]

[indistinct police radio transmission]

- I DON'T THINK SO.

- IS THERE A PROBLEM, OFFICER?

[beeping]

- WELL, YOU CROSSED THE COUNTY LINE

THREE MILES BACK.

YOU, MA'AM, ARE A PAROLE VIOLATOR,

WHICH MAKES THIS TEST NULL AND VOID.

I'LL TAKE THAT.

- SPONGEBOB, I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!

I'LL GET YOU!