Original subtitles

[light music playing]

[piano music playing]

[girl] Uncertainty and entanglement

mean different things in the world of physics

than they do to you or to me.

You might think you have a familiarity with uncertainty.

You don't.

You might feel that you've experienced entanglement.

You haven't.

But I have.

[piano music playing]

[sirens wailing]

[music continues]

So, um, as all of you know, we're only a few weeks away from the end of the semester,

which means all of you should be

over halfway through your theses.

And you guys have been handing in ten pages every week like champs,

and it's been amazing.

And since you have a few extra weeks,

a little extra time,

I'm gonna ask that you bring in 30 by the end of the break.

-[students groan] -I know, I know, I'm a terrible person.

It goes-- It just goes way back.

Dad left, Mom joined a cult.

That's my story, that's not yours.

-[whispering] Late again, huh? -[teacher] A rough childhood.

-I never knew my Dad. -Yeah.

-That's not on you. -I didn't fall asleep until 5:00.

Working on the grant submission?

-Yeah. -[teacher] Yeah, you guys have been...

You know, you really have to try some melatonin

or Sleepytime tea or something, it'll help you.

[teacher] For the last little bit...

And what was that about 30 pages?

You of all people could write that in your sleep.

I'm not sure about that.

Yeah, well, not with that attitude.

So, um, you don't have to go home,

but you can't stay here.

And, uh, class dismissed.

So what are you plans over the break?

Oh, I don't know.

I think I'm just gonna lay low,

catch up on some pages,

and maybe spend some quality time with Mike.

What are we talking about?

Rach was just talking about quality time and Mike.

Um, those two don't go in the same sentence.

-Shut up. -Worse every...

Oh, I'm late for work. I'll catch you guys later.

-See ya. -See ya.

[traffic noise]

Almond milk latte.

-[piano music plays] -[phone buzzes]

[door bells jingling]

Wow, someone's popular today.

It's no one important.

You can take it if you'd like.

I think I can manage.

Okay, thank you. I'll be back.

[door bells jingling]

[door closes]

Uh-huh.

I'm so sorry.

[door bells jingling]

[Kevin] Everything okay?

Yeah, everything's fine.

-[Rachel sighs] -Who is it?

[TV announcer] ...and tries to cut through the middle.

They're closing up on him only to gain one yard!

Back to the huddle.

Second down, nine from their own 35.

-What's up, beautiful? -Where have you been all day?

-Slater's dad just bought him this dope new truck-- -I called you 100 times.

Can you please stop letting yourself in like this?

Why? Are you hiding something?

You know I've been thinking of you all day, don't you?

-Really? -Yeah, how could I not?

So hot.

-Wait, wait, stop. -What is it now?

Mike...

my grandma died.

Fuck.

Baby, you-- you had a grandma?

[TV announcer] The ball is snapped.

[bell ringing]

Okay, I'll see you in a few weeks.

Have a great break.

[indistinct chatter]

Miss "Woods," could I have a word?

[Rachel] Yeah?

Is everything okay?

I guess not, seeing as I'm getting "Miss Woods" instead of "Rachel."

Uh, Rachel, you've been late to my class three times this week.

I just noticed you haven't handed in your ten pages yet,

and now you owe me 30 pages.

I'll try my best.

Sorry.

How's your grant application coming?

It's gotta be better than the writing you've been handing in recently.

What's that supposed to mean?

You're either exhausted, distracted, or in love.

The first two.

Have you tried melatonin?

Yes.

What's going on?

I've just been dealing with a lot of stuff recently.

Oh, stuff. Agh!

I hate that stuff.

[chuckles] Yep.

You wanna talk about it?

Death in the family.

Oh, God.

Are you okay?

-Yeah. -Are you going home?

Thinking about it.

Go.

Your best work is always about your family.

Maybe you'll-- maybe you'll get inspired, write about it.

The best writers built huge careers

writing about their stuff.

I can't.

I wouldn't even know where to start.

You only know where to start once you're finished,

so just start.

Start.

[sighs]

Just write-- write a few pages.

If it's nonsense, then you scrap it.

It will be nonsense.

You have no idea.

Rachel, I am an undergraduate writing teacher.

My experience with nonsense far exceeds

your imagination of it.

Okay, I'll try.

Just write one true sentence. Write--

Write the truest sentence you know.

Hemingway.

Hemingway.

[chuckles]

And, Rachel, even if it is nonsense,

it's cheaper than therapy.

-You have a good break. -You too.

[piano music playing]

[Sophie] What a load of bullshit!

I don't think so.

[Sophie] It's like an invasion of privacy.

Rach should be able to write about

whatever makes her feel comfortable.

And how far has that gotten you?

-What is that supposed to mean? -I'm just saying...

-[mocking] Oh, I'm just saying. -[Rachel] Guys, stop.

[Megan] Is everything okay?

Yeah, my aunt just text me about funeral details.

-You gonna go? -No.

I don't know, maybe.

Yeah, I'd stay away if I were you.

I mean, it's our final semester, and, honestly,

I'd rather kill myself than be around a depressing funeral.

-Really, Sophie? -What?

-I speak the truth. -[phone buzzing]

-[Rachel] You speak a lot of shit, though. -[toilet flushing]

Yeah, I do that, too.

Hey, your aunt just texted about some guy named Evan.

-Is that the old flame? -[Rachel] No!

Get off my phone!

Oh. Okay.

[water running]

Hey, look, Rach.

If going home isn't gonna help your writing,

then maybe it's the closure you need.

-[man on TV] Good, that should cover next week too. -[man 2] Sure.

Rach, your soap smells like fucking daffodils.

-It's lavender. -I smell like a dyke.

Shut up, it's calming.

[man] Do you think there's hope for us?

[man 2] Well, hope isn't the word I'd use.

[sighs] Now I'm calm.

You're stupid.

I'm not as stupid as you.

[man 2] That's great, Doc!

[man] Pump the brakes there, Johnny boy.

If there was a court order out there

that barred you two from having children,

I would sign it in a heartbeat.

Please tell me you never plan on procreating.

[woman] Pro-what? Let's take a shot.

What are your plans over Thanksgiving?

-Are you gonna go home? -Hell, no!

I was thinking that the boys could come over

and we could have some dope food and beers,

and maybe go out after.

-Here? -Yeah.

You know I don't know how to cook a turkey without you.

Mike, you don't even know how to make toast.

Hey, I like my bread black, all right?

-I'm actually thinking-- -Oh, and Slater

wants to hook up with Megan, so invite her.

I'm actually thinking of going home for the holiday.

What?

It's my grandma's funeral and I think it--

it would be nice to say goodbye properly, you know?

Last night you said you two weren't that close.

Mike, she's my grandma!

[TV dialogue continues]

I'd really like it if you came with me.

I could really do with the support.

And not to mention,

I always have so much fun on trips with you.

What's fun about a funeral? [scoffs]

-Are you joking? -What?

This is the one time I've asked you to do anything.

The one time!

And all you seem to care about is your fucking bros.

-Bros before hoes. -What?

Now, you know what I think is a fucking joke?

What?

That you'd rather spend time with your family,

who you've not seen in fucking years, over me.

Get out.

What?

I said get the fuck out!

[Mike laughs]

[woman on TV] I'm starting to understand him and myself a bit better.

[man] Well, that is his job...

[woman] Let me get this straight.

If I hurt him more, he'll love me more.

[man] Let's try to think of it as making love.

-[can clatters] -[TV continues]

-[light music playing] -[door opens, closes]

-[crickets chirping] -[light music continues]

-[traffic humming] -[birds chirping]

[luggage rattling]

[car engine starts]

[light music continues]

[knocking]

[metal clanking]

Evan!

[car approaching]

[Jessica] Rachel!

You're early!

-[Rachel] Aunt Jessica! -Oh, please drop the aunt.

-Makes me feel old. -[both chuckling]

[Jessica] Mm.

[sighs] Should we go inside?

-You must be freezing. -Yeah.

Hasn't changed at all, has it?

-Not one bit. -[chuckles]

You, on the other hand.

I mean, look at you!

It's been years. You look great.

[chuckles] Thanks.

-How's life treating you? -Yeah, um, really good.

I'm actually just about to finish college.

-What, already? -Mm-hmm.

That's great!

Do you want some tea?

Sure.

-[water rushing] -How's things with you?

They're good, good.

I mean, Adam's not dealing with it that well, you know,

but he's putting on a brave face for the kids.

Kids?

Yeah, we have two-year-old twins.

[exhales] Wow, um, I had no idea.

Congratulations to the both of you.

Oh, thank you.

And what about Evan?

Shouldn't he be home by now?

Evan is, uh...

He's grown up quite a bit since you left.

Honestly, I haven't seen him in a few months.

He and Adam have been having a few arguments lately

and he kind of avoided us whenever we came to see Grandma.

Oh, I hope he doesn't mind me staying here.

Don't be silly. We all love having you back.

Honestly, I think it'll be good for him to have you home.

[crickets chirping]

-Thank you. -You call me if you need anything.

I will.

-I'll see you tomorrow. -Mm.

[light music playing]

-[light clicks] -[light music continues]

[gas hissing]

[car door closes]

[footsteps thudding]

[car drives off]

[door closes]

[fridge door opens]

Hi.

The fuck are you doing here?

Jessica called me and told me about Grandma.

Thought it would be good to come.

You did?

-Are you staying here? -Um...

I saw you took Mom's room.

Yeah.

How was the party?

What?

You were out partying, weren't you?

No.

I was at the library.

I made breakfast for dinner.

Your favorite.

So, are you driving yourself to the service tomorrow,

or do you wanna come with me?

Yeah, I have friends driving me.

Okay, um, I think it starts at 12:30.

I'll be there at 10.

Are Peter and James driving you?

Are you still friends with them?

[plate clatters]

Do you ever get tired of asking questions, sis?

No.

It's not even that good.

[somber music playing]

[lamp clicks]

[birds chirping]

[knocking]

[knocking]

Evan?

[birds chirping, cawing]

-[door closes] -[quiet chatter]

-Do you have a minute? -Sure.

Your grandmother wanted you to have her wedding ring.

Wow, it's-- it's beautiful.

-What's going on? -[Jessica] I'm giving Rachel the ring.

-No, she can't take it. -[Jessica] Adam...

-It stays-- -She wanted me to have it.

It stays in this house.

Put it back in the box.

-[Josh] Looking for someone? -[sighs] Josh, hi!

Hi.

How are you? It's-- it's been a minute.

Yeah. Yeah, no. I've been-- I've been good.

-Good. -How about you?

How's the big city treating you?

Well, uh, I've been better.

Right.

Um, my condolences about your grandma.

Thank you.

It's been a really hard blow for everyone.

Yeah, I mean, she was a real pillar, you know.

She never stopped inviting me over for dinner even after--

even after you left.

[kitchenware clattering]

Look, Josh, I gotta go.

-But-- -Okay.

Thank you so much for coming.

I really appreciate it.

Yeah. Yeah, of course.

Um, hey, I hope this isn't insensitive,

but I'd love to catch up.

You know, hear about your LA life.

Yeah, that'd be nice.

[Josh chuckles]

I'll call you.

[door opens]

-[TV playing] -[door opens]

-You missed Grandma's funeral! -[door slams]

Oh, no shit.

What is wrong with you, Evan?

The woman practically raised you!

What? What? What?

Are you gonna act that you care a bit?

I care. What are you talking about?

Fuck.

[TV turns off]

What are you doing?

What... the fuck?

What are Adam and Jessica gonna think?

Do you think I care what they think?

They're probably happy I didn't go.

Of course they would want you to be there!

[scoffs] You can't just leave for three years,

then come back and expect us to act like nothing happened.

You can't do that.

-That is not what I'm doing. -Yeah, that's exactly what you're doing.

You know, if you'd been here, you'd know that Grandma died a year ago.

You'd know that she had dementia

and that she wouldn't even know me at the end of it,

that she'd confuse me with Adam, with fucking Adam.

We don't even look alike.

That she'd ask where you'd gone.

Well, she's left.

Where-- where Mom had gone.

Oh, she's OD'd and died.

Sorry, Grandma.

I didn't know.

Of course you didn't know

'cause you fucking left me.

So don't come at me because I didn't go to Grandma's funeral,

'cause I lived with her for three years.

I'm sorry.

Maybe next time, think about it before you speak.

Actually, sorry.

I...

I was actually thinking Peter's doing this--

this movie night tonight, and I was wondering

if I could borrow your car.

No, Evan.

Honestly, I feel a little sad here, you know?

We lived here, Grandma and I.

It's just gonna be a bunch of us,

just a group of friends watching a movie.

Peter-- Peter and Jake, remember?

Okay, fine.

But don't drink.

Thank you.

Keys are on the counter.

Thank you.

-[keyboard clicking] -[music playing over earbuds]

-Later. -[keys jingling]

[door opens, closes]

♪ And even though The colors change ♪

♪ But somehow I still want you ♪

[car door closes]

[car engine starts]

[phone clicking]

[line ringing]

-[light guitar music playing] -[woman vocalizes]

♪ I knew it from the start ♪

♪ That you would fuck me up ♪

♪ Doesn't have to be A lifetime ♪

♪ I just want you right now ♪

[Josh chuckles] Do you remember when I snuck you out

to go to Jason's party?

Thank you.

Oh, my God, my mom was so pissed.

[both laughing]

I still managed to win her over in the end, though.

-Yeah, you definitely did. -[chuckles]

Yeah, I miss those days.

I miss her.

I know.

-[light music playing] -[audience clapping]

[woman coughs, sniffs]

-[man] I got it. -[indistinct chatter]

[people groaning, sniffing]

-[chatter continues] -[light music continues]

[breathing heavily]

[woman mutters]

So tell me about LA.

Honestly, it's not glamorous at all.

I spend my time either working or writing.

Well, uh, you look great.

The SoCal sun agrees with you.

Thanks.

So, um, do you see Evan a lot?

Yeah, I try to-- I try to stop by when I drive past.

He's not in most of the time.

And when he is, he's usually with his girlfriend.

Girlfriend.

-Yeah. -[Rachel laughs]

I think it's his girlfriend.

I didn't know he had a...

I don't know for sure.

Don't get me in any trouble.

Don't worry, I won't.

[light music continues]

-[crickets chirping] -[Rachel sighs]

[door closes]

[keys jingling]

Josh?

I'm sorry.

What are you sorry for?

I'm sorry for leaving.

Yeah.

I understand why you did it, though.

You do?

Yeah.

You were so young and...

what you went through was...

awful.

If anybody should be apologizing, it's probably me.

I didn't exactly do a great job of helping you

through your grief.

Yeah.

We were both pretty young.

Yeah.

Do you hate me?

How could I hate you?

All I've ever wanted is for you to be happy.

Will you ever stop being so sweet?

Not with you.

[light music continues]

[crickets chirping]

[birds chirping]

[kisses]

[music playing over earbuds]

[sirens wailing]

[vehicle passes]

[ominous music playing]

[heartbeat thudding]

-[panting] -[suspenseful music playing]

-[light dramatic music playing] -[sighs]

[sighs]

Evan!

-[door slams] -Evan!

Evan?

[suspenseful music playing]

Evan.

[sighs]

-Jessica. -Hi, Rachel.

-Is everything okay? -Yeah, yep.

-It's Evan, he's not home. -Oh, calm down. What happened?

I lent him my car last night and he's not made it home, and I don't know where he is.

Okay, okay. Did you call his phone number?

[sighs] I don't have his number.

All right, let me try to reach him and I'll get back to you.

-Okay, yeah. -I'm sure everything's fine.

-Thank you. -Okay.

Thanks.

[sighs]

-[keyboard clicking] -[birds chirping]

[car door opens, closes]

Evan?

Evan!

Evan!

[door slams]

His friend Faith called me.

Your car's at Jake's.

He knows where to find it.

Look, honey, uh...

We can't keep doing this, Adam and I.

We just don't know what else to do.

We found a clinic, it's good.

A clinic?

Adam doesn't want him anywhere near the twins.

I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to call you.

[Jessica] Okay.

Since when?

[Evan] When what?

What the fuck are you on, Evan?

What? What do you want, Rachel?

-Just-- -Why are you doing this!

After what we went through with Mom?

Can you just go and spare me the spiel, Rachel, please?

-I-- I-- -Fucking look at me.

Okay... What? Mom--

I was at a party. What?

What do you want?

-When did this start? -When did what start?

The drugs, the partying.

Look, I just wanna get some sleep,

so if you can go, that would be great.

I'm not leaving until we've had this conversation.

What conversation?

-Hmm? -Just tell me how I can help you.

You can let me sleep and...

and we can talk about it later.

'Cause I'm not going anywhere, so...

Fine, and then you can take me to get

my fucking car, you asshole.

-Hey. -Hi, hey, Megan.

How is the writing discovery going?

Well, it's not going as good as planned, but, um...

I'm actually gonna stay here for a little longer.

I'm not quite sure how long, but, um...

Why? What's wrong? Is everything okay?

Oh, no, no, nothing's wrong.

No, I'm good.

I emailed Mr. Phillips, but if you could tell him on Tuesday,

-that would be awesome. -Yeah, of course.

I'm-- I'm so sorry to hear that.

Let me know if you need anything, okay?

I will.

Thanks, Megan.

Love you.

[sighs]

[phone thuds]

[birds chirping]

[gags]

[vomiting, spits]

[coughing]

[spits]

You don't look too good.

-Yeah, I'm fine. -Well, I made breakfast for breakfast this time.

You want some?

No, I'm good.

Okay.

I was thinking we could go on a walk later.

It's been a while since I've been up in these mountains.

It's November.

So what?

It's freezing.

You think 'cause I live in LA now I can't handle the cold?

I just wanna sleep, honestly.

Haven't you slept enough?

No.

Besides, don't you have anything better to do

than going for a walk in the freezing cold?

No, not really.

Okay, fine, we can go, but later.

Sounds good.

Also, I'm gonna take you up on those pancakes

since you made them.

Thank you.

Were you able to get your car back?

Yeah, I did.

Look, we really need to talk about that.

-No, we don't. -Yes, we do.

I thought it was a movie night.

We did watch a movie.

Yeah, I'm sure you did.

Also, what the hell? It's so cold in here.

Yeah, because you didn't get any firewood.

Yeah, that'd be my bad.

I might call Josh.

He might have some we can use for the night.

-Josh? -Yeah, that guy I used to date.

-Tall, really nice. -I remember Josh.

He came after you left to visit Grandma and I.

-He did? -Brought her flowers and everything.

-That was nice of him. -Yeah, very nice.

-Are you okay? -[Evan] Yeah, I'm fine.

[door closes]

-[knocking] -Evan?

[water running]

-[ominous music playing] -[knocking]

Evan?

-What happened? -Nothing, nothing.

I'm fine.

[ominous music continues]

[metal clanks]

[lighter clicking]

[light dramatic music playing]

[phone clicking]

[line ringing]

-[Josh] Hello? -Uh, Josh, hi.

[keyboard clicking]

[knocking]

[Rachel] Hey.

Feeling a little better?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Still down to go on that walk?

-[leaves rustling] -[birds chirping]

[Evan] So majoring in dramatic writing, huh?

[Rachel] Yeah.

[Evan] Who woulda thought?

[Rachel] What's that supposed to mean?

Nothing, I just never imagined my popular sister

majoring in writing.

Well, things change.

They really do.

Are you sure you're warm enough?

You want another hat?

-[Rachel laughs] -Some gloves or something?

I've got pockets.

Have you thought about what you wanna do?

-As in... -As in college.

What do you wanna study?

I haven't really thought about it.

I'm sure you've thought of something.

I remember you liked writing, too,

so don't play tough with me.

-No, I don't think that's for me. -Writing?

School.

It's-- it's not really my thing.

Plus, it's expensive, so...

I'm sure you've got the grades for a scholarship.

Things change.

How bad?

Drop it, Ray.

Evan.

Please talk to me.

I promise I won't get mad.

It's bad.

[light music playing]

[stammers] I don't go anymore.

Jesus.

Evan!

What?

Thought you said you wouldn't get mad, so...

I'm not mad.

[sighs] Well, I guess it's GED classes for you, then.

[Evan chuckles]

Don't laugh at me.

Look, I-- I know it's important.

I do think about it sometimes.

[sighs] I mean, I petitioned to get back in and everything,

but they wouldn't take me.

That's insane.

What did you do?

-Nothing. -Evan.

-Nothing. -Tell me.

I was high.

A teacher grabbed my bag and I grabbed it back and...

the principal said I'd assaulted the guy.

So...

I thought it was just partying.

When did it become partying at school?

I don't really know how to answer that question.

I'm...

I'm only asking 'cause I'm really trying to understand.

There's nothing to understand, really, I...

I just started doing it 'cause it made me feel good and...

now I do it so I don't feel like shit.

Evan.

You have so much going for you.

So many talents.

I would kill to write like you do, to paint like you do.

-Yeah, I'm a regular van Gogh. -Van Gogh killed himself.

All the best ones do.

-What are you doing? -Shut up, you're ruining the moment.

-[door creaks] -[Evan] Fuck, it's cold.

-[Rachel] Yeah. -[exhales]

[door closes]

I'm gonna go meet Josh. He said he has some spare wood that we can use for the night.

-Okay. -You wanna come?

Uh, no, I'm good, I'm just gonna stay home

and lay low and make some dinner.

We could stop by Jojo's and get hot chocolate.

No, I'm good.

Okay, well, uh, call me if you need anything.

Yeah, Mom.

I...

Habit.

It's all good.

-Bye. -Bye.

[birds chirping]

[heavy rock music playing over headphones]

[sighs]

[grunts]

-[rapid knocking] -[girl screams faintly] Evan!

-[knocking continues] -Evan!

That is some coat.

[Rachel] It's cold!

Come on in.

I'm sure you remember the way.

[Rachel] I do.

-[door closes] -[knocking]

[cries]

[knocking continues]

Hey, what's up?

I, uh...

-You okay? -I need a favor.

Uh...

Can I come in?

Yeah.

[door closes]

I'm-- I'm sorry about last night.

Um, Evan took my car and he didn't make it home,

so I needed to make sure he was okay.

-Was he? -Yeah, yeah, um, he just stayed at some friends.

So firewood, I have a few logs in the back

that should last you the couple days that you're here.

I'm gonna give you the number of the guy I order from

just so Evan can call him after you leave.

-Thank you. I owe you one. -Do you, uh, want anything to drink?

Coffee, tea, I made pie.

[chuckles] I actually have to get going.

Pie to go, then.

Cute mugs, Josh.

-I didn't know you had a passion for them. -Yeah.

Uh, my mom used to get me one every year for Christmas.

I don't even drink that much tea.

Great taste.

Let me go grab that firewood.

-[Evan] No. -Please?

I already told you I have nothing left.

-Evan, Evan. -[light dramatic music playing]

Evan, Evan, you're lying to me.

Oh, I can tell when you're lying,

-I'm not lying. I'm... -I'm your best friend.

-Tell me you're lying. -I'm not lying,

I'm not lying, but even if I had something,

I wouldn't give it to you.

-Look, hey-- -Cut the fuck--

Fuck, you're losing your shit.

Fuck you, Evan.

Fuck you!

That's fucking bullshit, man.

I'm fucked up? I'm losing my shit?

Who the hell do you think you are?

Who the fuck has been there for you

this entire fucking time, and now when I need something...

Now when I need something, oh, you don't fucking have it.

That's fucking bullshit. Who the fuck...

Who the fuck helped you out, like, two fucking nights

when you needed some shit?

This is fucking shit, Evan.

-Stop, Faith, stop! -Bullshit!

Stop, stop, stop!

-Stop, stop, stop! -[breathing heavily]

I may have something.

What?

Some weed.

Some coke.

Just not much, though.

That's fine. [clears throat]

That's fine, man.

-Anything will do. -[suspenseful music playing]

[Evan] Just wait here.

[breathing heavily]

[birds chirping]

-[trunk closes] -All right, that's the last of it.

[light music playing]

Uh, I've been meaning to ask...

I don't wanna intrude or anything, but are you, uh...

-What's-- what's Evan gonna do? -What do you mean?

Like, I didn't know if he was gonna go back with you

or if you were planning on selling the house.

Well, he's 18 in a few weeks,

so I guess that's for him to decide.

-I didn't mean to intrude. -No, it's, it's... it's okay.

Anyway, uh, I better be going.

-[light music continues] -[birds chirping]

[Rachel sighs]

Thanks for the pie.

-[door closes] -[car engine starts]

[pensive music playing]

[drawer rattling]

[hand thudding]

[Faith coughs, sniffles]

-This is all I have left. -Oh, fuck.

Oh, thank you so much.

Oh.

[stammers] You should go.

-[metal tapping] -No, Evan, come on, do a line with me.

-No. -[groans]

Fuck.

[snorting]

[groans, pants]

-Here, Evan. -[stammers] Just take it and go, it's fine.

-Just, just... Fuck, fuck, fuck. -[car approaching]

-Who is that? -Fuck, my sister. Just, just go, please.

-Evan, your sister's back? Why didn't you tell me? -Yes, yes, it's our--

It's just, please go.

-You have to go. Come on, go on. -Okay, yes, I know.

I'm going, Evan. Jesus, you're mean today.

[door closes]

[Evan] Hey, you're back early.

-Yeah. -Uh, this is Faith.

Faith, this is my sister, Rachel.

A pleasure!

Faith was just leaving.

Yeah, that's right, I asked him if he wanted to go out tonight,

but seems like he's just been a big old grandpa since you've been here.

Well, have a great night, guys.

-Drive safe! -[Faith] Yep!

[car door opens, closes]

[engine rumbling]

-[hands squeaking] -[door opens]

[Rachel] So Faith, huh?

Yep. [sighs]

Is she, like, your girlfriend?

Just a friend.

How long have you known her?

A couple years.

And why are you in detective mode again?

I'm just curious.

Okay.

What was she on?

-[light music playing] -How would I know?

We grew up with Mom. I can tell.

Cocaine.

I had some left you didn't take.

And did you?

No, I didn't.

I almost did, though.

It's really hard.

I know, Ev.

[Evan sighs]

[somber music playing]

[birds chirping]

[keyboard clacking]

[engine rumbling]

[car door closes]

-[door creaking] -Oh, Jess, hi.

-How's he doing? -Yeah, yeah, he's good, he's much better.

Good.

So, Adam and I spoke and we'd love

to have you over for Thanksgiving dinner.

It's a small thing, just us, really,

but we'd love to have you.

Well, that would be amazing.

We would love to come.

-Um, do you think Evan will be okay? -What do you mean?

You know, clean?

Yeah, of course he'll be clean.

Jessica, what's going on?

Before I say this, let me tell you that

I really truly love Evan and I am so sorry

that he's going through this and I am so sorry

that you're going through this.

My aunt was an alcoholic, I know how hard it can be.

What are you trying to say?

What I'm trying to say is that I have...

tried to convince Adam to let Evan join us for dinner,

-but he won't have it. -He's his nephew.

His sister went through the same thing,

-he should understand. -I know.

Believe me, I have tried to get him to understand.

Ever since Christmas last year, they have not spoken a word.

What happened at Christmas?

[car door closes]

Um, it was Christmas morning and we came over with the babies

to have lunch with Evan and your grandma,

but Evan wasn't back yet.

He came in, in the middle of lunch pretty out of it

and started asking your grandma and Adam for money.

When he could see that they weren't gonna give him anything,

he threatened Adam with a knife.

-Oh, my God. -It really wasn't as bad as it sounds,

he regretted it almost immediately,

but Adam never forgave him.

He felt that he was a danger to the twins

and they haven't spoken since.

I...

I'm so sorry.

But we won't be coming for dinner.

We'll be spending it here together.

-Are-- are you sure? -Yeah.

Okay.

Jessica?

I-- I really appreciate your honesty.

Can you tell my uncle that my mother would be ashamed

if she saw him treat her son this way?

Believe me, he knows.

[footsteps thudding]

[car doors thudding]

[car engine starts]

-[door closes] -[light music playing]

[dog barking in distance]

[sighs]

[bag rustling]

-[door closes] -[keyboard clacking]

[music playing over earbuds]

Afternoon.

♪ With you ♪

♪ I thought That you'd know... ♪

What are you working on?

Oh, just something for school. It's nothing.

Uh, Jessica stopped by when you were asleep.

-She did? -Mm-hmm.

And Adam.

Really? [chuckles]

Jessica told me about Christmas last year.

-She shouldn't have told you anything. -Yes, she should!

I was really messed up and it's usually not like that and--

and I was really messed up and I needed to get some stuff and I...

And I really...

I really didn't mean for that to go that way and...

and I've apologized to Adam a million times

and he just won't hear me out and...

I know, she told me that.

She did?

They were really trying.

Where do you get the drugs?

Why are you asking me that?

Was it Faith the first time you did it?

Was it?

-Well, she was there, yeah. -[exhales]

I really don't think you should see her anymore.

-Don't do that. -[light music playing]

She was there for me when you left.

Hanging out with an addict when you're trying to be clean?

Like, how is that gonna help?

I'm not stupid, okay? I-- I know.

-I know. -Can you promise me that you won't see her again?

-Please? -[light music continues]

-[leaves rustling] -[birds chirping]

[Rachel] Hurry up, you're missing the best part!

-[Evan] Where'd you get this pie? -Oh, Josh made it.

He gave me some yesterday to bring home.

-Marry him. -[TV chatter]

-No, seriously, what's going on with that? -With what?

You and Josh.

You're seeing him.

"Seeing him"?

I've been back in town for five days.

And he gave you pie.

If you ask me, he's committed.

No, I have...

I actually have a boyfriend in LA, whatever.

What does that mean?

Evan, I date the worst guys.

I saw a therapist once and he said

it was maybe because Dad left.

And he also said I have abandonment issues.

You think you do?

There's just something about these guys.

I don't know, they make me...

They make me feel worthy.

And then they treat me like shit and...

I feel like they take away all my worth.

And then I come here and you all actually have real problems

and here I am talking about this shit which is not important to anyone.

That's not true.

Look, I obviously have my own shit...

but that doesn't make your shit less important.

So when I left here, I moved to LA

and created this seemingly perfect life for myself.

Every day, I'd wake up and I'd think of you and Grandma.

Mom too, actually.

I liked to imagine your life...

who you'd grown up to be.

Like a famous writer or artist or something.

I guess I refused to believe that this would happen to you...

and that's why I didn't consider the consequences

-of me leaving because-- -Look...

It's not your fault.

-Sure. -Mom made her choices.

So did I and so did you.

It's not fair to think that we're responsible

for other people's actions. It's not fair.

Why do you sound like the older sibling right now?

-Must be all the pie. -[chuckles]

But to answer your question...

Josh is great, but that ship has sailed.

Although he did invite us over for Thanksgiving tomorrow.

Will there be any more of this pie?

[laughs] I'm almost certain.

Then that's a yes for me.

[phone buzzing]

Who's that?

It's nothing.

-[Evan vomiting] -[TV chatter]

[Rachel] Hey, you ready?

[Evan spitting]

-[water splashing] -Coming!

[birds chirping]

-[Josh, Rachel laughing] -[light music playing]

-Thank you, Josh. -Don't thank me.

Your sister did the garlic roasted potatoes, and that was my favorite part.

-Ray, stop. You're my guest. -You've done everything.

Not the garlic roasted potatoes.

You guys are like you used to, I like it.

Yeah, me too.

Just like we used to be?

-Well, he agrees. -Really, Evan?

I guess he doesn't know he's the other guy, does he?

Can you shut up!

Here we go.

[Rachel] Here we go what?

Everyone's having to pussyfoot around Rachel

just in case we might-- we might say

the slightest thing that might offend you!

You can be such a fucking brat sometimes.

-A brat? -Yeah.

-I'm a brat? -Yeah, a fucking brat.

You know what?

Since the day I got here, all I have done

is try, try, and fucking try.

Have you ever thought that-- that maybe

you're not the victim in life?

You're not the victim. Maybe you're the problem, Rachel.

Maybe you're the problem!

[Evan breathing heavily]

[Rachel] Fuck you.

Fuck you, Rachel!

[Rachel] I'm out.

[door opens, slams]

What happened?

She got pissed at me for making

that comment about you two.

Why? It was-- it was harmless.

I guess she has a boyfriend in LA or something.

She does?

Sounds like a fucking douchebag.

Okay, uh, look, I'm gonna-- I'm gonna go find her.

I just don't want anybody to be upset today.

I just wanted her to be with someone she deserves.

[Evan sighs]

Save some pie for me.

I will.

[door squeaking]

-[door slams] -Rachel.

-Rachel, wait up, stop! -What?!

I'm sorry, I-- I took it too far.

You always take it too far, Evan.

I don't get it.

It's like as soon as you're unhappy,

you're so desperate for everyone else to be unhappy.

That's-- that's not what I'm trying to do, I--

I want what's best for you.

You don't decide that, so keep your nose out.

-Like you're doing with Faith? -That's different.

How is that different?

Look, I see, I see and I've seen it,

how you smile when you're around him.

You smile like you used to when you lived here.

You don't see how I smile around Mike.

I really don't have to see that.

You said it yesterday, you only date douchebags.

Have you forgotten that?

-Or do you have a memory like Mom's? -Shut up!

I remember.

You're so stubborn.

Look, I'm gonna go in, I'm gonna chill with Josh,

and I'm gonna eat all the pie,

and if you don't come in, then you get nothing.

You wouldn't dare.

Try me.

-[door squeaks] -[leaves rustling]

-[door closes] -[birds chirping]

[keyboard clacking]

You look very intelligent in those specs.

That's because I am.

Toast or pancakes?

-Both. -A woman after my own heart.

[Rachel chuckles]

-Josh... -Yeah?

I'm really sorry about last night.

It was really rude to storm out like that.

Evan just really knows how to push my buttons.

What'd he say that upset you so much?

Just a bunch of nonsense.

I don't really think that him saying...

things are the way they used to be is nonsense.

Why didn't you tell me?

Tell you what?

About your boyfriend.

I'm sorry, Josh, I should've.

[scoffs] There really is not a lot to it.

Why didn't you say anything last night?

I wanted you to have a good time.

Plus, I was enjoying myself a little too much to bring it up.

It's really complicated with him.

We had a huge fight before I left and being here

is really making me feel that everything is over.

I mean, you should've had a conversation with him before the other night.

I didn't plan on that happening.

Do you regret it?

Not at all.

Okay, uh, I think you know how I feel about you,

but if you need me to back off...

I will.

No.

-You're actually really helping me get-- -[Evan] Morning!

[Josh] Breakfast is ready.

Yeah, I could get used to this.

-It's like a hotel. -[Rachel] Yeah, well don't.

Josh, when Rachel leaves, you're welcome to come here

and cook for me whenever you want.

-[Josh chuckles] -Ah, you won't be a burden at all.

Yeah, I think I would go broke in a week

with the amount you've been eating recently.

-I don't think so. -[Josh chuckles]

I could teach you how to cook, though.

I prefer eating, honestly.

[Josh] Yeah, don't we all?

Oh, it's, uh-- it's Sarah's tenth birthday.

We're having a party later, you guys should come by.

-She would love to see you both. -No way is Sarah ten.

I know, I know, it's double digits.

You guys gonna come?

Ev?

We all know how I love a party...

but I think I'm actually gonna look at some colleges,

some GED classes.

-Yeah. -Great, Ev.

[Evan] Yeah, don't get too excited

-'cause I'm just looking. -Too late.

I will need your laptop, though.

Mm, where is yours?

Um, mine is super old. If that's okay.

-Okay, fine. -Thank you.

[man on TV] Ain't no one gonna save your ass

-if you fucking... -[door creaks]

It looks like your research is going well.

We'll be back soon. Call me if you need anything.

Will do.

-Later. -Later.

[man] We're doing the legwork for you.

Okay, that's the last of it.

I'm just gonna get changed.

-[kids cheering distantly] -[light music playing]

[Rachel chuckles]

Stop.

I've gotta go get the piñata.

I'll be back.

[Josh hums]

[door opens, closes]

[gate slams]

[Faith] Josh!

-Where the fuck have you been?! -What are you doing here?

I told you not to come to my house anymore.

I need your help, man, I'm fucking dying. Please. [whimpers]

-[Rachel] What's going on? -[Faith] Oh, God.

-Nothing. -I'm not fucking around, Josh, I need my shit.

-You need-- you need to go. -I am not going anywhere

-without my something! -Jesus Christ, Faith,

-it is Sarah's-- Nothing! -What's she talking about?

Jesus fucking Christ, how stupid are you,

Little Miss Grad School?

Fuck you, God!

[Faith groans]

Go!

Don't move.

-[groans] -[door opens]

-[clattering] -Fucking Christ.

What?!

Beautiful day for a birthday party.

Piñata.

-[door closes] -[Faith] Okay. [clears throat]

I told you I don't do this anymore.

This is the last time.

[mouthing words]

-[door closes] -She's just...

Rachel, it's not... Look, it's not what you...

-I can explain. -Do you sell to my brother?

[woman on TV] Pride has everything to do with this.

-Listen. -[somber music playing]

[TV chatter continues]

-[suspenseful music playing] -[TV chatter continues]

[snapping]

[laptop clattering]

[dramatic music playing]

[panting]

[bag rustling]

-[car door closes] -[car engine starts]

[tires screeching]

-[door slams] -[light dramatic music playing]

[somber music playing]

[muffled police radio chatter]

[officer] We recovered the car in downtown San Francisco.

There was nothing left inside and no sign of your brother.

-[officer continues muffled] -[somber music continues]

Just keep your phone on you and just try to...

[officer continues muffled]

You ready?

[engine humming]

-[Rachel] It's all my fault. -You can't think that.

-Yes, I can because it is. -No, it isn't.

[Rachel] I was supposed to protect him.

You weren't supposed to do anything, Rachel,

you were just a kid.

You still are.

I'm Mom's age when she had me.

Yeah, that may have been part of the problem.

[Rachel] Seriously?

I'm sorry.

[car door closes]

[front door closes]

-What are you doing? -I'm unpacking.

-You're not staying here. -Yes, I am.

-No, you're not! -I have to.

-What are you doing? -You're not staying here.

Stop!

You're such a fucking asshole.

Oh, yeah, and why's that?

You did this to him.

-You isolated him. -I was protecting my family.

He is your family!

Yeah, I know.

And so are you.

Come here, sit down.

[Adam scoffs]

You're as stubborn as your mom.

Please, five.

Five minutes.

Come here.

Come here.

[Rachel cries]

Come here.

I love your brother.

I love you.

Just like I loved my sister...

and just like we loved our father.

But I know this disease too well.

He is gone and he has been gone for a long time.

He's not. He's gonna come back, I know he will come back.

Yeah, he'll come back and he'll be fine for three days,

and then it'll grip him like it does.

And then he'll go back out or he'll sell your things for drug money.

That's what they do, that's what your mom did,

that's what my dad did, that's what it does.

He is gone.

And it's you hoping that is gonna ruin your life.

He wouldn't do that to me.

Oh, he wouldn't?

You didn't try.

Not with Mom, not with Evan.

I'm not leaving.

I tried everything with your mom.

I've tried everything with him.

If I leave, you won't be here for him.

I'll be here.

I'm stuck here.

I'll be stuck here for the rest of my life.

Go and live your life, go have fun,

go and be a success.

He's not coming back.

You can't help him, there's nothing you can do

that I haven't tried.

And if you don't get out now...

you'll be stuck here for the rest of your life too.

It's your choice, kiddo.

It's your life.

[door opens, closes]

[Rachel sighs]

[somber music playing]

[crickets chirping]

[somber music continues]

[car door closes]

[piano music playing]

[car engine rumbling]

[piano music continues]

[phone buzzing]

-Hello? -[automated voice] Hi, this is your friendly

neighborhood wireless provider.

Do you have a moment to hear about our brand new offers?

It will only take a moment of your time

and it could save you up to $50...

[phone clicks]

[cries]

[Rachel's voice] My brother is a thought experiment.

A paradox.

Simultaneously dead and alive.

A quantum super position.

An entanglement.

One day, he may collapse into a definite state...

but until that day, I remain in suspension

between a one and a zero.

Every phone call, every errant noise convinces me,

for just a moment, that I'm about to have my binary answer.

Zero dead, one alive.

Zero one...

one zero.

Until the coin lands, until I have my answer,

I live as two people:

one in grief, the other in hope.

Each morning, both rise to the occasion to face the day.

And each evening, they go to sleep to dream.

They suffer in equal parts...

no more...

and no less.

[applause]

Thank you, Rachel.

Good job.

So, it's really an existential conundrum.

-[phone buzzing] -I mean,

-it's a chicken or the egg kinda deal. -[suspenseful music playing]

[phone buzzing]

[soft music playing]

[light music playing]

♪ We started out Two best friends ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ We fit together Like a puzzle piece ♪

♪ Feel like I'll never find it Again ♪

♪ We've got so many Inside jokes ♪

♪ It drives me insane ♪

♪ How do I tell you Every single one ♪

♪ Still haunts me? ♪

♪ And even though The seasons change ♪

♪ I don't change my mind About you ♪

♪ And even though The colors change ♪

♪ Our lives aren't the same ♪

♪ But you're still my home ♪

♪ I miss all the days We shared ♪

♪ Wasting all our time ♪

♪ Acting like fools But we didn't care ♪

♪ What other people thought Of us ♪

♪ 'Cause what we had was ours ♪

♪ We were fine Till it wasn't anymore ♪

♪ And even though The seasons change ♪

♪ I don't change my mind About you ♪

♪ And even though The colors change ♪

♪ But somehow I still want you ♪

♪ Different bodies Through the night ♪

♪ None of them Are feeling right ♪

♪ I just want you in my arms Tonight ♪

♪ Ooh, oh ♪

♪ Even though The seasons change ♪

♪ Our lives aren't the same ♪

♪ But you're still my home ♪

♪ You're still my home ♪

♪ And even though The seasons change ♪

♪ I don't change my mind About you ♪

♪ Even all the colors change ♪

♪ But somehow I still want you ♪

♪ Different bodies Through the night ♪

♪ None of them Are feeling right ♪

♪ I just want you in my arms Tonight ♪

♪ Ooh, oh ♪

♪ Even though The seasons change ♪

♪ Our lives aren't the same ♪

♪ But you're still my home ♪

[music ends]