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00:00:03,770 --> 00:00:06,800
♪ Money, money, money, money ♪
2
00:00:06,900 --> 00:00:08,670
♪ Money ♪
3
00:00:08,770 --> 00:00:11,170
♪ Money, money,
money, money... ♪
4
00:00:11,270 --> 00:00:12,280
Ha!
5
00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:13,680
Bull's-eye.
6
00:00:16,180 --> 00:00:18,280
Ah, throwing darts
at Mom again, huh?
7
00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:19,620
Must be alimony day.
8
00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:21,480
Yeah, I wrote the check
this morning.
9
00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,850
This is how I cope.
Right. That's healthy.
10
00:00:23,950 --> 00:00:25,490
Thank you. Wait.
11
00:00:25,490 --> 00:00:27,960
How did you get in here?
I changed the locks.
12
00:00:28,060 --> 00:00:29,790
Uh, by my buddy
Gary the locksmith?
13
00:00:29,890 --> 00:00:31,930
Damn it.
He's been compromised.
14
00:00:33,060 --> 00:00:34,200
Give me my key.
15
00:00:34,330 --> 00:00:35,560
Fine.
16
00:00:35,660 --> 00:00:37,670
It's okay.
I have another one.
17
00:00:37,770 --> 00:00:39,670
No, you don't.
Hand it over.
18
00:00:39,770 --> 00:00:41,100
Okay.
19
00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:43,370
Ha! Huzzah!
20
00:00:46,210 --> 00:00:47,280
How'd you do that?
21
00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:49,040
Let's just say
I can't cough
22
00:00:49,180 --> 00:00:51,210
or I'll give away
the hiding place.
23
00:00:51,310 --> 00:00:53,320
Okay, first of all,
don't cough.
24
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:54,550
Secondly,
25
00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:55,850
we got to take
a new family photo.
26
00:00:55,850 --> 00:00:57,790
Oh. That's a great idea.
27
00:00:57,890 --> 00:00:59,220
I-I can direct it.
28
00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:00,860
Great. Good. Okay.
29
00:01:00,860 --> 00:01:03,060
We got to do it soon before
the kids aren't cute anymore.
30
00:01:04,090 --> 00:01:05,760
Why wouldn't they be cute
when they get older?
31
00:01:05,860 --> 00:01:08,030
Because of this.
Oh, my God!
32
00:01:08,030 --> 00:01:09,430
What is that?
33
00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:12,170
That's you
when you were 12.
34
00:01:12,170 --> 00:01:14,700
Look like a baby horse
without your mustache.
35
00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,840
Yeah, you're right. I-I didn't
get hot till I was, like, 13,
36
00:01:17,940 --> 00:01:19,780
so...
37
00:01:21,240 --> 00:01:23,750
God, my...
38
00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:25,780
Got my key back.
39
00:01:27,020 --> 00:01:29,880
Don't ever
call yourself hot again.
40
00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:32,290
Fine. I wasn't delicious
until I was 13.
41
00:01:32,390 --> 00:01:34,760
All right, it's cool,
it'll just be me, you,
42
00:01:34,890 --> 00:01:36,690
- Nina... Mama...
- the kids.
43
00:01:36,790 --> 00:01:37,790
It'll be great.
44
00:01:37,930 --> 00:01:38,960
Who'd you say?
45
00:01:39,060 --> 00:01:41,060
The kids?
No, before that.
46
00:01:41,060 --> 00:01:42,930
Nina?
Between the two.
47
00:01:43,070 --> 00:01:46,070
Mama?
Yes. Her.
48
00:01:46,070 --> 00:01:49,140
The whole idea is to have
a photo without her in it.
49
00:01:49,270 --> 00:01:51,210
Okay.
Okay, what?
50
00:01:51,310 --> 00:01:52,980
To what you said.
What did I say?
51
00:01:53,110 --> 00:01:54,140
That you don't want her there.
52
00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:55,780
Okay, good.
53
00:01:55,910 --> 00:01:57,580
Great.
54
00:01:57,680 --> 00:01:59,780
Well, just to be clear,
55
00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:01,150
you're not gonna tell her?
56
00:02:01,250 --> 00:02:03,550
You said it.
57
00:02:03,650 --> 00:02:04,890
No, I want you to say it.
58
00:02:04,990 --> 00:02:08,190
I'll say it. Fine.
I was a hot 13-year-old.
59
00:02:09,690 --> 00:02:11,960
Get out.
And Catherine can't be there.
60
00:02:12,060 --> 00:02:13,530
Fine.
61
00:02:13,630 --> 00:02:16,300
I'll let myself out.
62
00:02:23,270 --> 00:02:25,340
How'd you do that?
63
00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:28,480
Let's just say
I have a lot of keys.
64
00:02:32,850 --> 00:02:34,550
♪ Poppa's ♪
65
00:02:34,650 --> 00:02:36,650
♪ House ♪
66
00:02:36,750 --> 00:02:37,850
♪ Yeah. ♪
67
00:02:37,990 --> 00:02:40,920
Okay, so my dad wants to do
a family photo,
68
00:02:41,020 --> 00:02:43,630
and he doesn't want
my mom in it, but I do.
69
00:02:43,730 --> 00:02:46,460
Yes, I know you want to be
standing next to her,
70
00:02:46,460 --> 00:02:48,500
skin-to-skin,
like when you were a baby.
71
00:02:48,630 --> 00:02:50,730
Yup, fresh out
the portal.
72
00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:54,100
Hold on one second.
73
00:02:55,170 --> 00:02:56,340
Oh.
74
00:02:57,540 --> 00:03:00,080
So, did you tell him that
you want her in it?
No.
75
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,650
I didn't tell him anything.
That's why I'm telling you.
76
00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:05,450
Babe, it's his family photo.
He and I
77
00:03:05,550 --> 00:03:07,720
have two different definitions
of what our family is.
78
00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:10,720
His family doesn't include
my mom, my family does.
79
00:03:10,820 --> 00:03:12,590
You know, because of him,
we haven't taken a family photo
80
00:03:12,690 --> 00:03:14,060
in, like, ten years.
81
00:03:14,190 --> 00:03:17,030
Then tell him.
I can't because
he'll just say no.
82
00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:20,230
That's why I tricked him into
saying that she can't be there.
83
00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,230
Because, technically,
when she comes,
84
00:03:22,330 --> 00:03:24,200
she's gonna be here
and not there.
85
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:26,570
That way,
he can't be angry at me.
86
00:03:28,370 --> 00:03:31,870
See, that is the problem
right there.
87
00:03:31,970 --> 00:03:33,680
You're afraid of him
being angry at you.
88
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:34,640
Yes.
89
00:03:34,640 --> 00:03:36,180
He's always angry.
Yes.
90
00:03:36,280 --> 00:03:39,180
That's like saying
water can't be wet.
Yes.
91
00:03:40,250 --> 00:03:43,650
Just accept that he's gonna
be angry and get what you want.
92
00:03:43,650 --> 00:03:45,490
You know what? You're right.
93
00:03:45,590 --> 00:03:48,320
I'm gonna go over there
and I'm gonna get what I want.
94
00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:50,390
Okay. Yeah, babe.
That's what I'm gonna do.
95
00:03:50,490 --> 00:03:52,400
Give him a piece of my mind.
You do that, baby.
96
00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:54,230
Gonna get what I want.
Okay.
97
00:03:54,330 --> 00:03:57,900
I just feel like the here, there
thing is better, right?
98
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:01,970
Babe, don't worry, I know
how this works, just trust me.
99
00:04:02,070 --> 00:04:03,770
And when it fails?
100
00:04:03,870 --> 00:04:05,410
Oh, it won't. You know why?
101
00:04:05,510 --> 00:04:06,880
Because you
102
00:04:06,980 --> 00:04:08,980
are my secret weapon.
103
00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:10,880
Oh, no, no, no, no.
104
00:04:10,880 --> 00:04:12,580
I am not getting
involved in this.
105
00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:14,920
Oh, well, I guess you don't want
to micromanage this event then.
106
00:04:15,020 --> 00:04:17,450
Did you say "micromanage"?
107
00:04:18,620 --> 00:04:20,690
You can pick out
the outfits...
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00:04:20,690 --> 00:04:22,290
Outfits.
109
00:04:22,430 --> 00:04:24,390
...the color scheme...
110
00:04:24,390 --> 00:04:26,360
Color scheme.
111
00:04:26,460 --> 00:04:28,330
...and your favorite...
112
00:04:28,430 --> 00:04:29,670
...the "shej-ule."
113
00:04:29,770 --> 00:04:32,000
Oh, the "shej-ule"!
114
00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:35,770
And you said it
the British way.
115
00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:38,140
I did.
116
00:04:38,240 --> 00:04:40,110
All right, fine, fine, I'm in.
117
00:04:40,210 --> 00:04:43,280
You had me at "shej-ule."
118
00:04:43,380 --> 00:04:45,550
This is gonna be the finest...
Oh.
119
00:04:45,650 --> 00:04:47,850
...Fulton
family photo
120
00:04:47,950 --> 00:04:50,290
the Fultons
have ever photographed.
121
00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,220
Say that
five times fast.
122
00:04:52,220 --> 00:04:53,060
I can't.
123
00:04:54,620 --> 00:04:56,060
"Shej-ule."
Oh!
124
00:05:01,060 --> 00:05:03,070
Heigh-ho, Daddy-o.
125
00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:04,830
I have great news.
126
00:05:04,930 --> 00:05:06,470
Nina has agreed to help
with the photo
127
00:05:06,570 --> 00:05:08,640
because she is such
a great event planner.
128
00:05:08,770 --> 00:05:09,970
You left out
successful,
129
00:05:10,070 --> 00:05:11,610
but I will let you live
to see another day.
130
00:05:11,710 --> 00:05:13,010
Thank you.
131
00:05:13,140 --> 00:05:14,910
Hold on, I thought you
were gonna direct this?
132
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:17,850
Yes, yes, and as director,
I have hired...
133
00:05:17,980 --> 00:05:20,350
...uh, was fortunate
enough to partner
134
00:05:20,450 --> 00:05:22,020
with such a successful
event planner.
135
00:05:22,120 --> 00:05:24,120
Fine. Just get it done
as quickly as possible.
136
00:05:24,220 --> 00:05:27,090
No fussing with the lights,
no fancy backgrounds.
137
00:05:27,090 --> 00:05:29,390
Just us standing in front
of a brick wall
138
00:05:29,490 --> 00:05:32,530
dressed in our New York
orange and blue, baby.
139
00:05:32,660 --> 00:05:34,100
Yeah, she loves it.
140
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:35,700
I hate it.
She hates it.
141
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:39,600
Here is my vision.
The family in white
142
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,640
standing outside
at magic hour,
143
00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:43,510
the sun's
about to set.
144
00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:45,510
It's nature's filter.
Yes.
145
00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:47,080
Yeah, I don't-- I-I think...
146
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:49,510
And the best part is, it has
to be done within 30 minutes.
147
00:05:49,650 --> 00:05:51,380
Sold.
148
00:05:52,180 --> 00:05:53,350
Oh, when I was
a little girl,
149
00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:55,380
my family
took that photo,
150
00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:57,950
and it was magical and...
Babe, it's all right.
151
00:05:58,050 --> 00:05:59,320
You sold it.
You're good.
152
00:05:59,420 --> 00:06:00,890
But I just wanted to tell him...
No, I understand.
153
00:06:01,020 --> 00:06:02,530
You can just, like, tell
me the rest at home, okay?
154
00:06:02,660 --> 00:06:05,430
But I just wanted to let
your dad know...
Shh. Mm...
155
00:06:05,530 --> 00:06:07,060
Be quiet.
156
00:06:08,630 --> 00:06:11,030
Okay, listen,
just to be clear,
157
00:06:11,130 --> 00:06:14,240
30 minutes and
She Who Must Not Be Named--
158
00:06:14,370 --> 00:06:16,610
Catherine-- must not be there.
159
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,880
Yes, she will not be there.
160
00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:22,210
Good.
Great.
161
00:06:24,980 --> 00:06:27,250
Because she'll
be here.
162
00:06:27,380 --> 00:06:29,620
My plan is going
as planned.
163
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:30,990
This isn't gonna work.
164
00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:32,890
Sorry, what?
165
00:06:32,990 --> 00:06:34,820
I said this isn't
going to work.
166
00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:35,960
One more time.
167
00:06:36,060 --> 00:06:39,560
This isn't going to...
168
00:06:41,030 --> 00:06:42,770
Needed it.
169
00:06:42,870 --> 00:06:44,270
Now, your mother
170
00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:45,730
has a very clever theme,
171
00:06:45,870 --> 00:06:48,570
and that theme is... white.
172
00:06:48,670 --> 00:06:50,840
I want to be dressed
as a princess.
173
00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:52,780
Boo...!
174
00:06:52,910 --> 00:06:55,510
You will be wearing
this white dress,
175
00:06:55,610 --> 00:06:57,450
and, Trey,
you will be wearing
176
00:06:57,580 --> 00:06:58,580
this white suit.
Pass.
177
00:06:58,710 --> 00:07:00,750
I want to be Indiana Jones.
178
00:07:00,850 --> 00:07:03,380
Oh.
That's badass, man.
179
00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:06,090
I'll get you a hat, a whip,
young Asian sidekick.
180
00:07:06,190 --> 00:07:09,260
Nobody is getting a whip
or a sidekick.
181
00:07:09,390 --> 00:07:10,690
This is a family photo.
182
00:07:10,790 --> 00:07:11,760
Now go change.
183
00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:14,230
Aw, man.
184
00:07:14,930 --> 00:07:18,670
Poppa's never gonna take
a picture with Glam-ma anyways.
185
00:07:18,770 --> 00:07:20,640
Sounds like a big waste
of my time.
186
00:07:23,770 --> 00:07:26,440
She's right. I really think
you should talk to your dad
187
00:07:26,540 --> 00:07:27,910
and tell him
that Catherine's coming.
188
00:07:27,910 --> 00:07:29,880
You do not want
an uncomfortable moment
189
00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:31,210
in front of the kids.
190
00:07:31,310 --> 00:07:34,620
I changed my mind.
I want to be a cop.
191
00:07:35,420 --> 00:07:37,790
Um, yeah,
where did you find those?
192
00:07:37,890 --> 00:07:39,090
Under your bed.
193
00:07:39,190 --> 00:07:41,820
Wh-- Get over here. Get.
194
00:07:44,490 --> 00:07:46,730
Hey, yo, we out. Thanks
for tuning in to Pop and Doc.
195
00:07:46,730 --> 00:07:49,460
Remember to set your clock
for the next time we rock.
196
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:51,130
Tickity, tick, tick, tock.
197
00:07:51,270 --> 00:07:53,540
That-That's good.
198
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,500
Isn't it?
No.
199
00:07:57,270 --> 00:08:00,310
Well, I know that you love
200
00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:01,940
these new
lavalier mics
201
00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:04,150
because we can do this
from anywhere now.
202
00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:06,050
Really? Can you do it
in your car?
203
00:08:06,150 --> 00:08:07,980
I've done it in my car before.
204
00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:10,820
You're talking about
the podcast, right?
205
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:12,590
Am I?
Are you?
206
00:08:12,690 --> 00:08:14,490
Are we interrupting
anything?
207
00:08:14,590 --> 00:08:16,760
No. Poppa was
just talking about
208
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:18,690
doing it in the car.
Doing what? No.
209
00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:20,700
Doing the podcast in the car.
210
00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:23,700
Is that
a vision board?
211
00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:26,270
Yes. I make one
for everything.
212
00:08:26,270 --> 00:08:27,470
Samesies.
213
00:08:27,570 --> 00:08:29,100
Yeah, it's for a family photo
we're doing.
214
00:08:29,100 --> 00:08:31,310
Oh, now, see, that is lovely.
215
00:08:31,410 --> 00:08:33,580
I always wanted a family photo,
216
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:34,740
but my mother hated the way
217
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:36,480
her face looked,
so... Yeah.
218
00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:37,950
We didn't even have mirrors
in the house.
219
00:08:37,950 --> 00:08:39,810
I didn't know what I looked like
till I was 12.
220
00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:42,150
My Aunt Carla said
I didn't miss much.
221
00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:43,690
That is so sad.
222
00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:45,350
Well, if you want,
you should stay
223
00:08:45,450 --> 00:08:46,990
and hop in for a photo
with our family.
224
00:08:47,090 --> 00:08:51,030
Or... don't.
Or she can just
hop in to one shot.
225
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:53,660
Or, hear me out, we buy
her mother a hockey mask
226
00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:55,660
and let her take
her own family photo.
227
00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:57,700
You're so silly.
228
00:08:57,830 --> 00:08:59,700
Hockey masks don't work.
We tried it.
229
00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:03,570
Anyway, I'm gonna go home
and change
230
00:09:03,670 --> 00:09:05,770
so I can honor
your vision.
231
00:09:05,870 --> 00:09:07,640
BRB.
All right.
232
00:09:07,640 --> 00:09:09,210
Mr. DeMille,
233
00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:11,250
I'm ready for my close-up.
234
00:09:11,850 --> 00:09:13,580
Daddy, don't.
235
00:09:18,420 --> 00:09:20,290
So... a little birdie told me
236
00:09:20,420 --> 00:09:22,360
that you're trying to cut me out
of the family photo.
237
00:09:22,460 --> 00:09:23,790
Tweet, tweet.
238
00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:26,290
That little dodo bird
over there and I
239
00:09:26,390 --> 00:09:27,600
had a conversation about this,
240
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:29,030
and you're not
supposed to be here.
241
00:09:29,030 --> 00:09:30,630
Yeah, uh, well-well,
technically, you said
242
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:32,100
you didn't want here there,
but now she's here,
243
00:09:32,230 --> 00:09:33,700
which certainly isn't there.
244
00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:35,240
I do not
want her here.
245
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:36,640
I do not
want her there.
246
00:09:36,740 --> 00:09:38,310
I do not want her anywhere.
247
00:09:38,440 --> 00:09:40,240
I do not want her
in my house.
248
00:09:40,340 --> 00:09:42,240
I do not want her
on my couch.
249
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,880
I do not want her
250
00:09:43,880 --> 00:09:46,080
because she's not my spouse.
251
00:09:46,180 --> 00:09:47,320
Shut it, Dr. Seuss.
252
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:48,950
Whether if I'm here or there,
253
00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:51,720
I'm still a part of this family,
and I should be in that photo.
254
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:52,990
The great thing about family
255
00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:54,720
is you get to cherry-pick
who's in it.
256
00:09:54,820 --> 00:09:56,730
Like, ooh, I like this cherry,
I like this cherry.
257
00:09:56,830 --> 00:10:00,330
But who is this old, tired
cherry with the big drawers on?
258
00:10:00,430 --> 00:10:02,730
Get out of my family, cherry.
259
00:10:02,730 --> 00:10:04,770
Uh, Dad, I think that's
the exact opposite
260
00:10:04,870 --> 00:10:05,830
of the way family works.
261
00:10:05,930 --> 00:10:07,270
Although I do love cherries.
262
00:10:07,370 --> 00:10:08,670
Especially
the old, tired ones
263
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:10,670
with big drawers on, Mom.
264
00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:12,410
Okay, look,
just so that we're clear,
265
00:10:12,510 --> 00:10:15,180
this juicy cherry has never
gotten any complaints,
266
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:16,580
and I don't even wear drawers.
267
00:10:16,580 --> 00:10:18,250
Mom, TMI.
268
00:10:18,350 --> 00:10:19,850
Uh, look, now, Nina,
269
00:10:19,980 --> 00:10:21,580
I heard all about your vision.
270
00:10:21,680 --> 00:10:22,850
Yes, I was thinking white.
271
00:10:22,950 --> 00:10:24,720
And I was thinking different.
272
00:10:24,820 --> 00:10:26,520
White blows out
on film,
273
00:10:26,620 --> 00:10:28,160
and it blows out my behind,
274
00:10:28,290 --> 00:10:29,830
so I thought,
275
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:33,200
drumroll...
276
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:36,060
Wouldn't crimson be fabulous?
277
00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:37,700
Red?
Yes!
278
00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:39,270
That's just gonna pull focus.
279
00:10:39,270 --> 00:10:40,570
Exactly.
280
00:10:40,670 --> 00:10:42,600
Red it is. Okay, children.
281
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:44,210
- Who wants candy?
- We do!
282
00:10:44,340 --> 00:10:46,710
We do!
Nuh-uh. What's my rule?
283
00:10:46,810 --> 00:10:50,010
Never to touch your clothes
'cause they Louis, baby!
284
00:10:50,110 --> 00:10:51,610
Yes.
285
00:10:52,650 --> 00:10:54,950
She'll be in red, all right,
because I'm gonna kill her.
286
00:10:54,950 --> 00:10:57,350
No need. I'm gonna set
that woman straight right now.
287
00:10:57,450 --> 00:10:59,620
No, Dad, wait.
Hush. Sit down.
288
00:11:02,860 --> 00:11:05,460
Look, how long are you gonna
let your parents steamroll you?
289
00:11:05,460 --> 00:11:06,860
This little here-there game
290
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:08,560
you've been playing
has not been working.
291
00:11:08,660 --> 00:11:10,900
You don't understand
my dad, all right?
292
00:11:11,030 --> 00:11:13,500
If he doesn't get his way,
he turns into a monster.
293
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:14,770
If my mom doesn't get her way,
294
00:11:14,870 --> 00:11:16,370
she turns
into an even bigger monster.
295
00:11:16,470 --> 00:11:19,340
Then let Godzilla and Momzilla
fight it out themselves.
296
00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:20,610
They'll destroy Tokyo.
297
00:11:20,710 --> 00:11:21,980
And in this, are you Tokyo?
298
00:11:21,980 --> 00:11:23,910
Yeah.
I'm always collateral damage.
299
00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:26,150
No, our children are
collateral damage
300
00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:29,250
because they are the ones being
exposed to all this dysfunction.
301
00:11:29,380 --> 00:11:31,150
And you need
to do something about it.
302
00:11:31,150 --> 00:11:32,220
What?
303
00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:33,620
Stand up to them.
304
00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:35,760
Make them see
the bigger picture.
305
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:39,230
You're right.
306
00:11:39,330 --> 00:11:41,660
I'm gonna stand up to them.
Yeah.
307
00:11:41,760 --> 00:11:43,430
I'm a man.
You're a man.
308
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:44,600
I'm a man.
You a man!
309
00:11:44,700 --> 00:11:46,670
I'm strong.
You're strong.
310
00:11:46,770 --> 00:11:47,970
Look at these muscles, babe.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
311
00:11:48,070 --> 00:11:49,670
Yeah. So what you gonna do?
312
00:11:49,770 --> 00:11:51,770
I'm gonna stand up
to my parents!
And when you gonna do it?!
313
00:11:51,910 --> 00:11:53,910
I'm gonna do it right now!
Now!
314
00:11:54,040 --> 00:11:55,680
- Junior?
- Coming, Mommy.
315
00:11:55,680 --> 00:11:57,780
Oh, my God.
316
00:11:57,910 --> 00:12:01,420
You tell your father that I am
still a part of this family.
317
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:04,420
I spent 36 hours, 27 minutes,
and 14 seconds
318
00:12:04,550 --> 00:12:06,350
pushing your big head
out into the world.
319
00:12:06,350 --> 00:12:09,490
And all he did was just show
up to the hospital and faint.
320
00:12:09,590 --> 00:12:12,190
Yeah, after I saw all that stuff
come out on a bungee cord.
321
00:12:12,290 --> 00:12:14,030
Uh, okay, so, uh,
322
00:12:14,030 --> 00:12:15,900
just talked to mi madre,
and she said that...
323
00:12:15,900 --> 00:12:18,530
You tell her, I did more
than just come to the hospital.
324
00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:20,900
I caught your big head.
And you dropped it.
325
00:12:20,900 --> 00:12:22,600
Because it was slippery.
326
00:12:22,740 --> 00:12:24,540
Um, so, uh, Daddy said
he saw all this stuff...
327
00:12:24,540 --> 00:12:25,610
I heard what the man said.
328
00:12:25,710 --> 00:12:27,410
Okay.
No, you know what?
329
00:12:27,410 --> 00:12:29,210
You tell her,
if she want to take a picture,
330
00:12:29,210 --> 00:12:31,380
take one in the house that
she bought with half my money.
331
00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:33,920
Ooh, that's a wordy one,
but I will give it a shot.
332
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,480
You know what? I get it.
333
00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:37,450
You don't have to tell me twice
that I am not wanted.
334
00:12:37,550 --> 00:12:40,260
I've told you six times,
and you're still here.
335
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:43,330
You know what?
The seventh time
is the charm.
336
00:12:44,590 --> 00:12:46,230
I'll be at Junior's house.
337
00:12:46,230 --> 00:12:48,100
No!
338
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:49,900
Dad.
339
00:12:49,900 --> 00:12:51,800
Please stop.
340
00:12:51,900 --> 00:12:53,370
I'm not doing this, okay?
341
00:12:53,470 --> 00:12:54,800
She is not my family.
342
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:56,300
I'm calling
this whole thing off.
343
00:12:56,440 --> 00:12:57,770
No, you're not.
344
00:12:57,770 --> 00:13:00,270
Look, all I want is
for a simple photo
345
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,850
of my entire family to hang in
my house for my children to see.
346
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:05,950
I'm sorry, I'm out.
No, Dad.
347
00:13:06,050 --> 00:13:08,450
I'm not asking.
I'm demanding.
348
00:13:08,450 --> 00:13:11,750
I'm not a little birdie
anymore, Dad.
349
00:13:11,850 --> 00:13:13,660
Oh, so you're stepping
to me now?
350
00:13:13,790 --> 00:13:16,860
Yeah, 'cause I'm Big Bird.
351
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,790
From Sesame Street?
Yeah.
352
00:13:18,890 --> 00:13:20,000
The big yellow one.
353
00:13:20,130 --> 00:13:21,430
Well, you take one more step,
354
00:13:21,530 --> 00:13:22,800
I'm having chicken tonight.
355
00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:25,730
He's not... a... chicken.
356
00:13:25,830 --> 00:13:28,170
He's bird-racial.
357
00:13:29,540 --> 00:13:31,970
Well, if you're feeling
froggy, then come on and jump.
358
00:13:31,970 --> 00:13:33,710
Oh, you want
to poke the bear?
359
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:35,680
Yeah, I thought
you was a bird.
360
00:13:35,810 --> 00:13:38,350
I transitioned.
361
00:13:38,450 --> 00:13:40,550
I'm a bird and a bear now.
362
00:13:40,650 --> 00:13:42,450
So you're a bird
and a bear...
363
00:13:42,550 --> 00:13:43,920
Mm-hmm.
...with horns?
364
00:13:44,020 --> 00:13:45,650
Yeah.
365
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:47,420
And I'm horny.
366
00:13:50,690 --> 00:13:53,560
You better moo... ve.
367
00:13:53,660 --> 00:13:55,460
Okay, listen.
368
00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:59,400
I know this seems very simple
to you, son,
369
00:13:59,530 --> 00:14:01,970
but it's very complicated
for me, okay?
370
00:14:01,970 --> 00:14:04,040
I'm not doing this.
371
00:14:05,570 --> 00:14:06,910
Okay.
372
00:14:07,740 --> 00:14:08,980
You win.
373
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,780
I'm gonna call the kids over,
and then you can explain to them
374
00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:14,820
why you can't stand next
to their grandmother
375
00:14:14,820 --> 00:14:16,680
for a simple family photo.
376
00:14:16,780 --> 00:14:18,750
Does that work for you?
377
00:14:30,030 --> 00:14:34,240
One. I'll take one
damn photo with her.
378
00:14:34,370 --> 00:14:35,900
Good. Mom,
379
00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:37,910
Dad has something
he wants to say to you.
I didn't say I...
380
00:14:38,010 --> 00:14:39,640
It's too late. I'm leaving.
381
00:14:39,740 --> 00:14:42,610
No. You drop those bags
right where they are,
382
00:14:42,740 --> 00:14:44,210
young, old lady, and sit down!
383
00:14:44,210 --> 00:14:46,010
Pardonne-moi?
384
00:14:46,110 --> 00:14:47,420
Pardonne nah.
385
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:51,050
I'm not your hot little
13-year-old middleman anymore.
386
00:14:51,050 --> 00:14:54,890
Now you guys stay here
and work this out.
387
00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:56,460
Give me that.
388
00:15:00,930 --> 00:15:03,470
Look, Cat, this is...
389
00:15:04,730 --> 00:15:06,940
...really hard
for me to say, but
390
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,740
the reason why
I wanted a new family photo
391
00:15:09,740 --> 00:15:11,740
is because every time
I look at mine,
392
00:15:11,740 --> 00:15:15,210
it reminds me
of our failed marriage,
393
00:15:15,310 --> 00:15:16,880
and that's...
394
00:15:16,980 --> 00:15:18,450
that's painful for me.
395
00:15:18,550 --> 00:15:20,950
Okay, listen,
I get it, all right?
396
00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:23,550
But besides what happened to us,
we got to find a way
397
00:15:23,650 --> 00:15:25,950
to get along
for the sake of this family.
398
00:15:26,090 --> 00:15:28,360
Especially the little ones.
399
00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:30,330
They're our legacy,
400
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,460
and it's a damn beautiful one.
401
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:34,060
You're right.
402
00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:36,530
Trying to erase you from the
present doesn't change our past.
403
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:38,730
And neither does throwing darts
at my head.
404
00:15:38,830 --> 00:15:41,970
Or writing "For Freedom" on
the memo of the alimony check.
405
00:15:42,100 --> 00:15:43,640
Yeah, well, you can write
whatever you want
406
00:15:43,740 --> 00:15:45,240
on the check
as long as it clears.
407
00:15:46,810 --> 00:15:48,640
I hate writing
those checks.
408
00:15:48,740 --> 00:15:50,610
Oh, but I love cashing 'em.
409
00:15:50,610 --> 00:15:52,950
I know. I see every month.
410
00:15:52,950 --> 00:15:55,750
Just keep writing 'em,
baby, keep writing 'em.
411
00:15:57,620 --> 00:15:59,490
Ah, but seriously,
Catherine,
412
00:15:59,590 --> 00:16:01,690
I-I was wrong,
and I'm asking you,
413
00:16:01,790 --> 00:16:03,760
please be in the family photo.
414
00:16:03,860 --> 00:16:05,690
Say that again.
415
00:16:05,830 --> 00:16:08,060
Please be in the family photo.
416
00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:09,700
No, the other part.
417
00:16:11,530 --> 00:16:12,430
I was wrong.
418
00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:14,840
Fine.
419
00:16:14,970 --> 00:16:16,800
I'll stay.
Okay.
420
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:19,670
And I think you owe
Nina an apology.
Hmm.
421
00:16:19,810 --> 00:16:21,940
Nina?
I'm right here.
422
00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:23,780
Where? Oh!
423
00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:25,380
Uh, okay.
424
00:16:25,510 --> 00:16:28,620
Uh, listen, I'll admit I might
have gotten carried away.
425
00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:29,820
Carried away with what?
426
00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:31,690
My vision for the photo.
427
00:16:31,790 --> 00:16:32,790
Like you did when?
428
00:16:32,790 --> 00:16:34,360
Perhaps your wedding.
And?
429
00:16:34,490 --> 00:16:36,520
Maybe your 30th
birthday party,
430
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:38,660
which we all knew
was your 35th.
431
00:16:38,660 --> 00:16:41,200
And?
And don't push it,
Polly Pocket.
432
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,660
But I do believe
that there is a way
433
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:45,930
we can blend our vision.
434
00:16:46,030 --> 00:16:47,870
I appreciate your non-apology.
435
00:16:47,970 --> 00:16:49,040
You're welcome.
436
00:16:49,170 --> 00:16:51,310
Kids, you can wear
whatever you want!
437
00:16:51,310 --> 00:16:53,470
Yay!
438
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,910
You can wear your crimson red.
439
00:16:56,010 --> 00:16:57,380
You can wear your prison outfit.
440
00:16:57,510 --> 00:16:58,410
Yeah.
441
00:16:59,880 --> 00:17:01,320
While Junior and I
442
00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:03,750
will be glowing in white.
443
00:17:06,290 --> 00:17:07,260
What?
444
00:17:10,490 --> 00:17:11,930
What the hell are
you doing here?
445
00:17:12,060 --> 00:17:13,600
He's my father. I invited him.
446
00:17:13,730 --> 00:17:16,200
That's right.
I mean, I am a patriarch.
447
00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:19,070
Well, why are you dressed
like Santa's drug dealer?
448
00:17:20,740 --> 00:17:22,270
Don't you remember?
449
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:24,140
This is the suit we wore
450
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:26,440
in the Top Hat Boys
in high school.
451
00:17:26,570 --> 00:17:28,280
It still fits me like a glove.
452
00:17:28,410 --> 00:17:30,880
Yeah, the O.J. Simpson glove.
453
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:32,950
Come on. One, two, three.
454
00:17:33,050 --> 00:17:35,180
♪ We're the Top Hat Boys ♪
455
00:17:35,280 --> 00:17:37,120
♪ Gentlemanly and exquisite ♪
456
00:17:37,220 --> 00:17:38,850
♪ Our top hats we exhibit ♪
457
00:17:38,950 --> 00:17:40,790
Come on, sing it with me.
458
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:42,460
♪ No sex till marriage ♪
459
00:17:42,590 --> 00:17:45,760
You will never have sex again
wearing that stupid outfit.
460
00:17:45,890 --> 00:17:47,800
He's right, Joseph Joseph.
461
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:50,800
Don't give me this thing.
462
00:17:50,930 --> 00:17:52,270
Oh.
463
00:17:53,100 --> 00:17:56,100
♪ No sex till marriage! ♪
464
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,470
We're married,
so we can definitely...
465
00:17:58,610 --> 00:18:01,510
Uh-uh.
466
00:18:01,610 --> 00:18:02,980
All right, guys,
the sun is setting.
467
00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:04,480
Let's go change and get outside.
468
00:18:04,580 --> 00:18:06,280
Yeah?
Good idea.
Yeah, yeah.
469
00:18:06,380 --> 00:18:07,720
I'm proud of you.
470
00:18:07,820 --> 00:18:11,120
I know it took a lot
to stand up to your mom and dad.
471
00:18:11,220 --> 00:18:12,450
Thanks, babe.
472
00:18:12,550 --> 00:18:14,690
Could not have
done it without you.
473
00:18:14,790 --> 00:18:16,890
I'm sorry everyone's not wearing
all white like you wanted.
474
00:18:16,990 --> 00:18:18,560
Eh. That's okay.
475
00:18:18,660 --> 00:18:21,130
The most important thing
is that we're taking this photo
476
00:18:21,260 --> 00:18:23,970
of this big, beautiful,
dysfunctional family.
477
00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:26,800
Yeah.
478
00:18:27,970 --> 00:18:29,170
Hey, can I ask you something?
479
00:18:29,300 --> 00:18:32,410
Yes, you were a hot
and sexy 13-year-old.
480
00:18:32,510 --> 00:18:34,140
Yes. All right.
481
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:37,310
Um, if no one
objects, I'd like
482
00:18:37,410 --> 00:18:40,150
to stand right next
to Catherine.
Ooh.
483
00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:41,820
Well, I not only don't object.
484
00:18:41,950 --> 00:18:43,820
I'd love that,
Joseph Joseph.
485
00:18:43,950 --> 00:18:45,850
Just no smelling my hair.
486
00:18:45,990 --> 00:18:48,660
That's all right because I've
already memorized your scent
487
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:50,920
and sprinkled it
in my top hat.
488
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:54,160
Mmm. Catnip.
489
00:18:54,260 --> 00:18:55,500
Yuck.
490
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:59,170
And I won't be standing next
to either one of you.
491
00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:01,840
Oh. Well, we'd love that, too.
492
00:19:01,940 --> 00:19:03,540
And I'll be standing
next to my wife,
493
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:05,770
whether anyone
likes it or not.
494
00:19:05,870 --> 00:19:07,340
And my mother.
495
00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:09,410
Oh, my gosh.
496
00:19:09,510 --> 00:19:11,480
Traffic was crazy.
497
00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,280
I had to abandon my car,
take off my shoes,
498
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:15,880
and Sha'Carri my butt over here.
499
00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:17,190
I hope I look okay.
500
00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:19,050
Yeah, okay,
if that's what you're going for.
501
00:19:19,190 --> 00:19:20,790
You know,
502
00:19:20,790 --> 00:19:23,060
I never thought
I'd be a part of a family photo.
503
00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:26,360
I mean, I know we're not related
by blood or law,
504
00:19:26,460 --> 00:19:28,800
but it feels just as right.
505
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:31,100
Really. Ah.
506
00:19:36,470 --> 00:19:37,770
Bull's-eye.
507
00:19:42,110 --> 00:19:43,810
Okay, well,
if you want some of this bull,
508
00:19:43,910 --> 00:19:45,910
go ahead and flick the horn.
509
00:19:46,010 --> 00:19:48,080
Hmm?
510
00:19:49,250 --> 00:19:51,390
One more time.
This isn't going to work.
511
00:19:51,490 --> 00:19:53,690
I don't...
Hmm.
512
00:19:55,020 --> 00:19:57,630
Your breath smelled like
Tootsie Roll, babe.
513
00:19:57,760 --> 00:19:59,090
The dance.
514
00:19:59,790 --> 00:20:02,100
Like 25 of these, just...
515
00:20:04,930 --> 00:20:06,430
Like, whatever that smell is.
Come here.
516
00:20:06,570 --> 00:20:07,800
What?!
517
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,370
That's a great idea.
I-I can direct it.
518
00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:11,770
Yeah, good.
519
00:20:11,870 --> 00:20:14,040
Okay, but we got to do it quick
because we got...
520
00:20:14,140 --> 00:20:17,180
No. We got to do it soon
before the kids get un-cute.
521
00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:18,950
Un-cute?
We got to do it cute before...
522
00:20:19,050 --> 00:20:20,780
We got to do it...
Okay, we got...
523
00:20:22,950 --> 00:20:25,250
All right, fine, fine. I'm in.
524
00:20:25,250 --> 00:20:28,120
You had me at "shej-ule."
525
00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:30,590
This is gonna be
the finest...
Oh.
526
00:20:30,690 --> 00:20:32,630
...Fulton family photo
527
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:35,300
the Fultons have
ever photographed.
528
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,260
Say that
five times fast.
529
00:20:37,270 --> 00:20:39,570
I can't.
530
00:20:39,570 --> 00:20:42,640
"Shej-ule."
Oh!
531
00:20:42,740 --> 00:20:43,740
What's wrong?
532
00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:46,670
I'm "shej-uling." Oh.
533
00:20:51,210 --> 00:20:54,450
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
534
00:20:54,550 --> 00:20:57,250
and TOYOTA.
535
00:20:57,350 --> 00:21:00,720
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
37589
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