All language subtitles for D.2023.S01E04.1080p.WEB.h264-EDITH_track3_[eng]

Welcome back to "Discontinued."

I'm Bruce Campbell -- legendary,
timeless, magnetic.

Those are just
a few of the words

that have been used
to describe me...by me.

I'm transmitting live
from my bunker in the year 2037.

We're neck-deep in a dystopian
existence, thanks to AI.

Now there are only remnants
of a once-thriving society,

and, yet, I still can't get out
of my gym membership.

[Bruce] This is "Discontinued."

Ever since we humans
hauled our hairy butts

out of caves...

Watson, come in here.

[Bruce] ...we've shared
the world with technology.

Hey, computer, tell me a joke.

[Bruce] We let them in
but couldn't get them out.

Human intelligence
is a funny joke.

[Bruce] And these AI a-holes
took everything.

Everything, that is,
except for the stuff

that was before their time.

So, here I am, Bruce Campbell,
sealed inside a cave

with the last shreds
of humanity's glorious past...

the stuff we discontinued.

Folks, we're beaming this

TV show from the future
to warn you about what's coming

and to transport you
back in time

to cherish the treasures
of the past.

Okay, yeah, that was
a little convoluted,

but the branding people
have been all over us.

[Bruce] I've contacted a crew
of reporters

in your present timeline.

These masters of their craft
will present bite-size nuggets

of nostalgia, and some will be
hard to swallow.

Bleh.

[Bruce] I request an audience
with "TRL."

"Terrible Request Live."

Welcome to live MTV.

[Bruce] And we revere Betamax...

It's like a washer and dryer
in your living room

with a TV on it.

[Bruce] ...arguably,
one of human civilization's

most underrated achievements.

-Absolutely revolutionary.
-Really?

[Bruce] The social-media
platform Friendster

that kicked it all off...

It was the first time
I was like,

"Oh, wow, we don't have
to talk to each other

in real life anymore."
[Bruce] ...gets the boot.

Myspace just came
and kicked its ass!

[Bruce] But first...

Imagine you have an awesome dog

that's adored by your kids.
Let's call him Carl.

[dog barks]

Everyone loves Carl.

Then one day you decide
to get a brand-new dog.

Let's call him New Carl.
[dog barks]

Then you drive Old Carl
to a desolate country road

and speed off,
never looking back.

[dog whimpers]

Well, that's what happened
with Coca-Cola

when it came out with this,
New Coke.

So, how did new Coca-Cola
customers react to this?

Well, they said something
along these lines.

"[bark] you, you [bark] idiots."

But, again, I'm paraphrasing.

So, let's pop the top
and drink in

the fizzy folklore of New Coke.

This is Andre
from "Discontinued."

I'm on the streets
of Los Angeles,

where I've set out
to find people

to share their fondest memories
of New Coke.

Have you ever heard of New Coke?

-No.
-Absolutely not.

Have you ever had New Coke?

-Yeah, never heard of it.
-Yeah.

[Andre] Well, that's because
New Coke wasn't it.

♪ Coke is it ♪

♪ The one that never
lets you down ♪

♪ Coke is it ♪

[Andre] But Coca-Cola was really
hoping to make this it.

New Coke is the biggest
marketing blunder

in history, period.

Ooh, look at this.

This is the one
that was rivaling Pepsi.

Then when it came out,
you're like, what the...

[dogs barking]

[Andre] The love for Coca-Cola
flows deep within the hearts

of cola enthusiasts.

Original Coca-Cola
and Diet Coke are life.

I'm an addict.

[Andre]From the first fizzy sip...

-Tsss!
-Ahh!

Oh!

[Andre] ...to the last
satisfying gulp,

the love never falls flat.

[PK]
We cannot live without Coke.

It's like one of the four
basic food groups.

It's basically America,

to the point where there is
a large section of this country

where all soda
is referred to as Coke.

I grew up in the Midwest and in
the South with my grandparents.

They call everything Coke.

It's like, "Hey, what you want?"
"Coke." "What kind?" "Sprite."

[Andre]Then there's the other drink.

Pepsi.

Ooh!
You said the "P" word.

Pepsi, to me,
was the cool kid on the block.

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

Michael Jackson was drinking it.
"Hey, we doing Pepsi, yay!"

[Andre] Or to put it in terms
we can all understand...

There's the Kardashians,
and there's the Jenners.

Kim will always be the one.
She's the Coca-Cola.

Kylie and Kendall
are the total Pepsi.

It's like they kinda get ahead,

but they really just
don't taste as good.

This is embarrassing, you guys.

[Andre] The epic rivalry between
these two soft-drink giants

was not exactly a subtle one.

-Something to drink?
-Yeah, a Coke.

[record scratches]

I meant a Pepsi.

[Andre] Vying for dominance

in the world
of carbonated beverages...

Coke decide that Pepsi
was catching up,

'cause they were hip
and for the kids.

[Andre] So, they revamped
the iconic recipe.

This became New Coke.

We were like, "Yeah, New Coke!"

And then you tasted it.
You're like, "Bleh."

The problem with New Coke is,
it was so gross.

[Andre]Americans couldn't stomach

this strange, new taste.

-How do you even drink that?
-Because it's delicious.

[Andre] And the flavor

wasn't the only thing
turned upside down.

And they're like, "Let's get rid
of the old classic Coke."

[Andre]People went absolutely nuts.

They were protesting.
They were in the streets.

[Andre] It was like
a cola catastrophe

of epic proportions.

Their call center at Coke
was flooded,

like, 10,000 calls a day.

"Who the hell do you think
you are, changing our Coke?"

[reporter] In California
they collected signatures.

In Seattle they set up
a hotline.

[Chris] Coke said that when
people called to complain,

it sounded like they were
losing a family member.

It's like, "You changed
my sugar water.

I miss Uncle Larry."

What's the matter, Wilbur?

They changed my Coke.

People don't like change.

Coulda asked.

People were pissed.

Coca-Cola made some crack heads.
I'm just gonna say that.

[Andre] And speaking of crack...

Somehow, them changing
the recipe from Coke

to New Coke was more unpopular

than when they got rid
of the cocaine in Coke.

Right? Everybody knows that.

[Andre] Well, not this guy.

Back in the early days,
the original Coca-Cola recipe

did contain trace amounts
of cocaine.

However, in 1929,
the Coca-Cola Company

removed the cocaine
from its recipe.

I could imagine people were
pissed when that happened.

Like, "Why am I not
feeling crazy anymore

when I drink the Coke?"

And, so, the New Coke
was spelled "Coke"!

[Andre] But don't be fooled.

Everybody thought they put
the cocaine back in it.

The real cocaine?
No, not the real cocaine.

Even my auntie had to tell me.
I smoke crack.

It's no crack in there.
Trust me. I know.

[Andre] With Pepsi in close
pursuit from behind,

Coke needed to rewrite
their future.

They decided to go back
to the past.

They went back to old Coke.

[Andre] That's right.

After only 79 days, they
shelved the idea of New Coke.

"Oh, yeah, we're gonna bring
back as Coca-Cola Classic."

Everyone's like,
"Yay! Coke's amazing."

[Joe] When it comes
to Americans, like,

you can take away our rights,

you can make it
more difficult for us to vote,

but, man, if you mess
with the soda flavor...

They pissed people off so much
that it reminded everyone,

"Oh, yeah, we actually
really love Coke."

Just give them the old Coke.

Coca-Cola, you know what I mean.

Don't do old Coke.
That is bad for your health.

And now it's time for another
"Discontinued in the Wild"

from the past in the present.

My street correspondent
Andrea Lopez

has found a little spot
to picnic.

Tell us about the spread you
have in front of you, Andrea.

[Andrea] Hey, Bruce,
we're enjoying the sights

and sounds
of Griffith Park today,

and I think you're gonna love
what we're getting into.

We are taking a look,
a deep dive,

into some beverages
that were once discontinued,

but they're making
a resurgence now.

Let's get into it.

Hi-C Flashin' Fruit Punch...

Hi-C was first introduced
on the McDonald's menu in 1955

and created serious outrage

when they no longer
carried it in 2017.

Hi-C -- sweet, citrusy,
it's giving me flashbacks...

of good things.

Clearly Canadian.

Clearly Canadian
was officially launched in 1988

as a new-age soda alternative.

Oh, that's refreshing,
not too sweet.

I feel like now I can sing
the Canada national anthem.

♪ O, Canada ♪

[chittering]

Mountain Dew Pitch Black,
a Halloween flavor.

[announcer]This Halloween, it's unleashed.

But I do --
I feel it going down.

I feel it.
Good night!

We have a super-special
Baja Blast from the past

that Taco Bell
introduced in 2004, never left,

'cause it's so wildly popular.

It's time to elevate
the Baja Blast.

That's right.
We're spritzing it.

She is beauty.
She is Baja Blast.

It's like I'm on the coast
of Mykonos right now.

[Bruce] Coming up, more cries
were heard when "TRL" was on...

Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!

[Bruce]...than when it was gone.

I remember "TRL"
because I hated it.

[Bruce] And we weep with delight
at Betamax.

Oh, dude.

As I contemplate life here
in 2037,

it's fun to remember
all the shows

that have graced
our TV screens --

absolute gems
like "Burn Notice,"

"Ash vs. Evil Dead,"

"The Adventures
of Brisco County Jr.,"

and "Jack of All Trades."

Now, is it a coincidence
that those are all shows

I've appeared in?

Frankly, no.

But I didn't appear
in an MTV breakthrough show

that was a pop-culture
phenomenon, "TRL" --

"Total Request Live."

The show was a mixture of music,

live performances, videos,
and celebrity guests.

A mainstay
for boy-band-obsessed teens,

the show was hosted
by Carson Daly,

who had the unique ability
to make Ryan Seacrest

look cool.

So, let's take a plunge
into the world of "TRL."

In our present times,
nobody calls anyone anymore.

It's cringe -- about as cringe
as me saying "cringe."

But when MTV created a show
that made teens the hive mind

of what music videos
were most popular,

in 1998, buzz was spelled T-R-L.

Welcome to live MTV.

"Total Request Live" --
"TRL," if I'm not mistaken.

Oh, "TRL." I lived for "TRL."

That show was my childhood.

[Andre] Every Monday
through Thursday,

the cool kids tuned in
to see MTV's live, top-10

video countdown.

I remember "TRL"
because I hated it.

"TRL" --
"Terrible Request Live."

[Andre] You can't please
everyone.

But you can create instant
chaos by shooting live

in the Big Apple.

[Tony] In the heart
of New York City,

the most requested videos
of the week,

week after week, pandemonium.
Pandemonium.

And we are about to get
into your number-one request.

[Andre] But amidst this
pandemonium was democracy.

Every teenage vote counted --
well, probably.

Did my voting even count?

You know how many times
I voted for Limp Bizkit?

And they never won!

♪ We gonna party like it's... ♪

[Andre] It was the '90s.

Erectile Dysfunction
was a band name,

latchkey kids let themselves
loose in New York,

and people still watched TV.

[Jessica] There was no YouTube.

This is how we watched
music videos.

If you wanna see
a new music video premiere,

you gotta get home at 3:30
and watch "TRL."

[Ester]
Every single 13-year-old kid

was watching the exact same show
at the exact same time.

[Andre] There's really only
one way

to describe the experience.

Aaaahhhh!

[crowd screaming]

[elephant trumpets]
-[chirping]

[Andre] "TRL" was giving
everyone a sense of...porpoise,

and teens everywhere joined
the high-frequency battle cry.

Hundreds...

...thousands...

Millions...crying.

[crying]

-Aaahhhh!
-[screaming]

[Andre] "TRL" shattered
eardrums and TV records,

but what the hell
was all the screaming for?

That show could make you.

NSYNC.
[crowd screaming]

And Britney Spears.

-♪ Ner-ner, ner-ner ♪
-Christina Aguilera.

♪ Whoa-oh-oh-oh ♪

[Tony] Backstreet Boys.

♪ Backstreet's back, alright ♪

They would tell you,
"This is who you gotta like."

[crowd screaming]

It's gonna be Backstreet Boys
this week.

♪ Tell me why ♪

[Carson] Settle down,
settle down, settle down.

[Andre] Settle down?

It was the dawn
of a golden age, a boy's age,

and they were usually
in a band.

[Shane] I was such a closeted
boy-band fanboy in the '90s.

I couldn't be public
about my fandom for, like,

NSYNC, Backstreet Boys.

No, I'm not gonna lie.
I mimicked that little,

like, hairstyle,
the swoosh in the front.

I actually dyed the tips
of my hair, to -- don't.

[Andre] Wow. Is that Lance Bass?

-Aahhh!

[Andre] "TRL" had music's
hottest videos, sexiest stars,

screamiest screamers,
and one man to rule them all.

Yeah.

What was his name?

[Andre] His name, of course,
is, um, wait one sec.

Carson Daly.

-[Andre] Oh, yeah.
-Carson Daly.

[Andre] Carson Daly,

the fearless
yet forgettable captain

of the beautiful ship "TRL."

Was he hot?
I don't know, not really.

Was he ugly? Not at all.
Was he interesting?

Hmm, no.
Did he ask great questions?

-Wanna tell us about your song?
-N-no.

Carson Daly looked like he could
have just been your barista.

I just don't care.

[Ryan]
To be able to get that famous

by having to put in
that little energy is my dream.

Still think what's-his-name
wasn't important?

Well, after he left,
"TRL" went RIP.

Viewership declined,
and then "TRL" was discontinued.

The last episode aired in 2008.

[Andre] And that's really
something to cry about.

Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!

[cat screeches,
elephant trumpets]

[dolphin chirps]

I love to read about the world's
bloodiest battles,

like the Battle of Waterloo,
the Battle of Gettysburg,

and, of course,
the bloodiest battle of all,

the battle of...Betamax.

Ah, poor Betamax.

You never really got to shine
in the spotlight

because of that
attention whore, VHS.

Let's unravel the story
of how VHS

killed the video star, Betamax.

Betamax was like hitting
a home run

in the world
of video home recording.

It stormed in hotter than
a bake sale on the 4th of July.

With its cutting-edge
technology,

nothing was more impressive
than this big-ticketed item.

That whole thing?

Oh, that TV!

[Ron] Why's it so bulky?

That's half the size
of your living room.

Where would you put that?

[Andrea] It was the year 1975,
when Sony unleashed

this revolutionary beast
upon the world.

[Ron] It's like a sailboat,
a cruise ship,

like a washer and dryer in your
living room, with a TV on it.

[Percy] This looks like an oven.

It looked like burners,
you know?

Your video will now be roasting
for 30 minutes and then be done.

[ding]

[Andrea] Betamax gave us
the ability

to control our own viewing
experience like never before.

[announcer] Betamax will allow
you to break the time barrier,

to record the present
and save it for the future.

[Nicki] Betamax is Sony's baby.

Being able to watch movies
and record television broadcasts

on your own personal device...

-I mean, really?
-...absolutely revolutionary.

[Andrea] Only the coolest kids
on the block

could lay claim to this brick
of a machine.

My dad was super excited
about having it,

while our neighbor didn't.

That's just...

He would have his buddy
come over,

and they would stand
in the living room...

I mean, that is...

...looking at the Betamax thing,
like two old dudes would stand

in a garage looking at engines.

Wow, what is that?

This is the Sony Betamax.

It's as easy as one, two, three.

Put the video cassette in.
Select the channel.

Press this button.
Set the optional timer.

Set this. Press this button.
Press "record."

[Andrea] With the popularity
of home-recording devices

on fast forward...

[tape fast-forwarding]

...the TV industry tried
to put it on pause.

[woman screams]

[Andrea] Bigwigs were worried
about piracy and lost profits.

It all came to a head
in the Supreme Court case

Sony Corporation of America
vs. Universal City Studios.

But the Supreme Court
sided with Sony

and stood up for our right
to use technology

without infringement fears.

Some people delved
into the art of dubbing,

hoping they wouldn't get
"Block-busted"...

[Shain] I know my dad
would rent a movie.

He would dub the tape.

[Andrea] ...by the FBI.

They would explicitly say
the FBI's gonna kick our

[bleep] door down
if you do this.

He'd be like,
"Don't tell nobody."

[Andrea] But soon, the doors
would be blown wide open.

[announcer] ...with the HR-7100
video recorder from JVC.

[Andrea] JVC swooped in
with their newfangled VHS,

which was lower quality
but also a lower price.

VHS actually launched
at a fraction

of the cost of a Betamax.

[announcer] And its very
affordable price...

[Andrea] A VHS machine
would set you back

a mere $1,000, which in today's
money is, um, kind of a lot.

[laughs]

[Andrea] But still a lot cheaper
than the Betamax.

Some models of the Betamax
behemoths set you back

a whopping $2,295...

[laughs]

[Andrea] ...which in today's
money is a disturbing amount.

What a world.

[Andrea] It was a time
of epic rivalry

and intense competition
between two giants

of the home-video industry.

Thus began...

The war of digital formats.

[Andrea] What ultimately
unraveled Betamax

in the VHS-war saga was...

[announcer] Welcome
to Blockbuster Video.

Blockbuster ended up choosing
to utilize VHS over Betamax.

[Andrea] Many people
had their own opinions

on the factors that led
to Betamax's defeat.

Betamax lost to VHS

because they wanted to make porn
on VHS and not Betamax.

Oh, dude.

To me, I would just be like,

"Yeah, we're doing
the 'Bater-max.'"

You maximize your beating off.

"Bater-max?" Yeah, yeah,
I could see that.

[Andrea] And so,
like so many wars,

when it came to the battle
of the tapes,

it's clear
that they were all losers.

[Bruce] Coming up...

I had the most friends
of anybody on Friendster.

[Bruce] ...how social-media
pioneer Friendster...

If you were on Friendster,
you definitely had no friends.

[Bruce] ...met its "endster,"
when "Discontinued" continues.

Our next topic is a look back
at a simpler time,

when there wasn't a place
for fake news

to spread like wildfire

and tear apart
the fabric of society,

a time before social media.

Facebook, Instagram,
Twitter, TikTok, and Threads --

but before all of these,
there was the OG, Friendster.

So, let's rewind the clock and
explore the Friendster files.

[Andrea] Social media today
is overwhelming.

We've got fashion influencers,
vloggers.

There's even a dead cat
out there

with more followers than me.

I mean, come on. Can't we go
back to the simple days,

collecting friends
on the Internet?

Friendster? I have fond memories
of Friendster.

I don't think I've met
anybody that was,

"Yeah, Friendster's
the website."

It was not.

I loved Friendster.

These are my opinions.

Friendster was...

Friendster was one of
the early giant social networks.

The downfall of Friendster
is a fascinating story.

[Andrea] Downfall?
We just got here, buddy.

This Friendster thing was
the face before Facebook.

It was a way to make
new friends,

a way that
we'd never seen before.

It was the first time
I was like, "Oh, wow."

We don't have to talk to
each other in real life anymore.

[Andrea] Jonathan Abrams was
dead set on making friendsters.

Been dying to be on the show.

[Andrea] And in 2002 making
girl friendsters in particular,

if you know what I mean.

Jon Abrams was dumped
by his girlfriend,

so he started Friendster
as a way to meet new women.

So, there's always been, like,
the fake story

that I started Friendster
to meet girls,

which is not true.
-All right.

People started trying to hook up
through Friendster.

-Not true.
-[Andrea] Then what the hell

was it for,
to send chain letters?

The school I was going to
was multi-ethnic.

Friendster was highly
recommended to me

by the one white girl.

[Andrea] Wait.So, you do meet
girlson Friendster.

If you go to meet, you click
on all these different people.

[reporter] If you have Bex as
a friend, you get her friends.

You get her friends' friends.

So, within four degrees of me
are 700,000 people!

It's crazy!

[Andrea] Friend requests
with benefits.

If you were on Friendster,
you definitely had no friends.

I had the most friends
of anybody on Friendster.

I think I broke records.

[Andrea] Oh, Friendster
was breaking all the records.

Within the first few weeks,

Friendster hit
several hundred users

and within the first few months,
million users,

which at the time
was unheard of.

[Andrea] Unlike Internet
blabbermouths today,

there ain't much room to rip
on the Friendster page.

[PK] It was just kind of like
this ghetto version of LinkedIn,

So, just this little,
simple, little --

"PK's such a good friend."

[Andrea] Others wished
they could ban

the online "illiterature"
altogether.

Myspace launched in 2003
and walked all over Friendster

by early 2004.

Myspace just came
and kicked its ass!

You could change the backgrounds
up a little bit more.

You could add, like,
a page music,

and, like, you could have
a lot more fun on there.

[Andrea] And then there was
the "Zuck."

The writing was on the wall,

but Friendster wasn't ready to
throw in the towel completely.

They decided to make
the strategic move

into the world of...

-Video games!
-Oh, God.

In 2009, they rebranded the site
as a social-gaming platform.

I think the end is near for you

when you have
to pivot like that.

And in 2015, the site
finally shut down.

Friendster left a cold void
in cyberspace,

but some folks made
digital friends for life.

"Yo, you need to start
a Friendster profile.

You have to get a Friendster."

And others prefer they never
knew them in the first place.

Time to recap...
from New Coke fizzling out

and leaving a bad taste,

to "Total Request Live" becoming
"Total Request Dead,"

to the bruising battle
of formats that erased Betamax,

and social-media pioneer
Friendster becoming friendless,

each one evokes a nostalgic
longing for a specific era.

They may be a distant memory,

but it's something we're keeping
alive by cherishing them today.

That doesn't really
mean anything,

but it made me
sound intelligent.

I'm Bruce Campbell,
signing off from my bunker.

Until we meet again,
keep kidding yourself!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪