Original subtitles

PRIZES

Here Tiësto. Risotto with seaweed.

Enjoy.

- Have you won anything? - No.

Hey, kid, you'd be better off giving those 10 euros

you throw away every month to me.

- It's a much better investment. - I'll get on it right away.

By the way, you still owe me 100 euros.

- What's the yield on that? - Look here, my director.

What director?

What director?

Yes well, it's not totally official, but...

Wow, someone in our family is making it big.

Wow, business cards and all.

You know, Mum and Dad would be very proud.

NEW TEXAS

Start taking your clothes off.

Here, a director has to look good.

What's that?

500 euros.

Fons knows a Georgian who'd do it for 150, to size.

You know, roughly.

You need to look like a director, not like a mafioso.

This will be fine.

Look.

Sexy with style. Mr Director.

You'll return it tomorrow?

Come on...

After my assessment.

That will make a good impression.

What's an assessment?

Well, there's an assessment.

It's a test.

A little test. A little test, just a formality.

They're required to do it by law.

Giving everyone a chance, I guess?

A little test?

Yes, like a little exam.

- An exam? - A little exam.

Surely we're not going to have a morphological discussion?

Look.

Two pages. That's nothing.

- And what's that attachment? - What?

It says: "see attachment".

532 pages of environmental law?

- What's all that? - Nothing, I guess.

Who'd put something like this in an attachment?

She could have mentioned that.

Which idiot did that?

And so we'll have to make sure, all of us,

that Jan, as the first Vrancken, breaks through to the top.

So I expect everyone's full support and commitment

- during this study period. - What study period?

Yes well... it's just a little formality.

A mini-exam, a confirmation of my skills.

Everyone has to do it.

Everyone? How many of you?

Gosh... Five?

Ten? Fifteen? Does it make a difference?

So, you have approximately a 6% chance?

No, Nur. We'll remain positive.

We're all going to support Jan.

And it has to be quiet in the house. Peter.

- No music. - But...

Nur, no sitcoms.

And no football.

Hello.

No, not hello.

When Jan gets through, we'll all benefit.

We'll celebrate in an appropriate way.

OK?

Come on, dinner's ready.

Darling.

You're allowed an extra serving of this delicious soup

to help stimulate your brain.

Hey, have you seen Stan?

No. Why?

I haven't heard from him and he's not answering his phone.

That's unusual. He was home late yesterday too.

As a woman, you have to know where your bloke is.

That's true. And ours are around the table now.

- And Fons had no idea. - You know what he's like:

tight with information.

But what did you have to collect all night?

No Kato, not allowed.

It's for Jan. Energy boost.

- I'm not allowed to say. - You don't want to.

It was 3am and you were sleeping. Beautifully.

No, Kato. That's for Jan too. Fast sugars.

I'll buy something on the way.

- Come on. - No.

Hey, what's up with Kato?

Fresh vitamins, to stimulate his grey matter.

That's in this too.

Hey Tiësto, my boy. Here.

You know what used to work for me? Music.

- While you were studying? - For everything.

Yes, you eat it up, go on. Say Peter.

Hey, Charlotte babe, that's our game.

So just ring my bell. Ring my bell!

I've got something for you.

A Tamagotchi.

- A tama-what? - Tamagotchi.

It's a computer animal that you have to feed to keep it alive.

As long as the Tamagotchi is alive, our love will grow.

You have to feed it now.

- Like this? - Yes.

Jan Vrancken.

Yes, sweetie. It's research, you know.

Monkeys. That's environmental law too.

Here, Tarzan.

I'll test you.

Fine.

Article 52.

What can you tell me about lawn mowing during the day?

Yes, that is...

Article 52.

Lawn mowing during the day...

- Is... - In...

residential areas...

is...

- allowed. - Yes.

Provided it is no longer than 10 consecutive minutes...

- that the threshold of 80 decibels... - Decibels.

- is exceeded. - Yes.

- After 8 in the morning and... - 8 at night!

No, Jan. Not correct.

- Yes, but... - No buts.

- I still had to revise that bit. - Here. See?

Yes, but it's a lot to take in in such a short time.

Maybe too much.

Not with my study schedule. Look.

Get up, study, break...

And every time you finish a section, you put a sticker on it.

Complete a row of stickers and Miss will give you a reward.

Cool.

Yes, cool. Why don't you get started?

No.

Jan, I have a few insider tips to help you pass.

- Like in the past, you mean? - I have a very bad memory

except when it comes to music, or even better, when it rhymes.

You try it. Wait.

Ground water in Article 10

I've seen that well, well, well

Capillary zone

Amazon

Sing, sing

Lord of the see-e-e-e-e-e-e...

Your turn.

- Give me that game. - What's your highest score?

Guys! It's not a Gameboy.

It's the symbol of my eternal love for Charlotte.

- Give it here. Don't be so gullible. - Don't touch it.

Idiot.

Oh, look. Come on, boys.

Give me that Tamagotchi.

Give it here.

But if you don't feed it, it'll die.

Darling Peter, it's a piece of plastic with batteries.

In this family there are no secrets, Kato.

So let it all out. The real problem.

I already told you about Jan's haemorrhoids.

Unfortunately.

And how much it hurts to put ointment...

Irena, enough.

Come on, then.

Yeah, OK.

It feels as if Stan is hiding something from me.

He comes home late, throws his clothes in the wash,

- hops straight into the shower... - And in bed?

Usually too tired.

Code red.

That's not right, Kato.

Men are like children. They never say no to an ice cream.

- Wake up. Stan is a Lothario. - Who would've thought that of Stan?

- Still waters... - Because he doesn't want sex?

- Aren't you exaggerating? - Grill him, like the CIA does.

You watch too much TV.

First: check if his clothes smell of another perfume.

Second: check his pockets and his wallet for condoms.

Third: check his mobile, including outgoing messages.

Fourth...

- Where have you been? - Honey, you're still awake.

You're not tricking me twice. Where have you been?

Just something for Fons.

- And what exactly? - It's nothing to worry about.

- Why don't you answer your mobile? - Can you be quiet please?

People are trying to study here!

- I'm listening. - Must have been on silent.

Silence, please!

I guess I didn't hear it.

Really, you're imagining things. I love you.

Yeah, yeah.

It's time.

I am counting on all of you for this last effort

so that Jan can focus for his exam.

Nur.

While you're pouring his coffee you'll tie this towel around his neck.

Splash marks are the enemy. You'll help him put his cardigan on.

- And you'll read him the keywords. - OK.

And me?

You...

I'll create some fat beats to keep him awake.

Good idea.

- In your room. - Yes, OK.

Let's do it, everyone.

Jan, let's focus.

- Yes, get on with it, Johnny boy. - Article 10, ground water.

Contamination, sewage, capillary zone...

Stop!

Not now.

I just want some... peace. OK?

My head is full.

- You don't want it to overflow. - Why don't you all leave him alone?

Darling.

You'll do great.

Look me in the eyes. You'll be great.

Really.

Thanks.

Jan...

Put that somewhere, man. It's for good luck.

I'm going to need it. Thanks.

Good luck.

Here?

Stressful.

And?

Lots?

- Here you are. - Thank you. Thank you very much.

Vrancken.

Jan.

Yes, guys. It's up to us now.

With this system we can directly communicate with Jan's pen.

It's not that we don't believe in Jan.

But I do think that he could use all the help he can get.

And go.

Yes.

Fons to Jan.

Fons to Jan.

This is the Vrancken family from the lounge.

In Operation Jan Promotion.

Over.

Fons.

It works.

This will cost me my exam. Over.

- Jan, do you copy? - Idiot!

Over.

Out of ink.

The ink ran out.

Come on, man.

What's he doing? Idiot!

Lord of the se-e-e-e-e-e...

See, that was my idea. It's pretty good, isn't it?

Oh, that doesn't sound good. That sigh is way too long.

Maybe he's relieved.

- Fons. - Jan, copy.

- Spons, do you copy? - The damn thing isn't working.

Come on, Fons. Do something.

Spons.

Formulate here...

I think we may have to activate plan B. Over.

Fons, what is plan B? Over.

We shouldn't all say "over", OK?

We are here, live.

A bomb scare, that's plan B.

- You can't do that. - They can trace that.

- Give me your mobile, man. - No.

- Just for a minute. - No.

- One phone call. - No.

No!

No.

Charlotte, wait. I swear it's not my fault. My father...

Yes, it is. You had to look after it.

I'm really upset about it too. I'll buy you a new one.

I'm not crying about the Tamagotchi, but about us.

If you can't handle this, you can't handle a relationship.

But Charlotte, wait. I love you so much!

Charlotte...

Hello, Charlotte.

Mrs Jacobs.

Ready for part two, Mr Vrancken?

Not one of the Daltons, know what I mean?

No. You know, I mean...

I mean, it's just...

What is it: yes or no?

Yes...

Well yes, you could say that.

You can't choose your family, can you, Mrs Jacobs?

Ah, that.

Yes, fortunately I have outgrown that environment.

But the others...

not doing great, are they?

Our Fons, with his illegal junk...

Peter...

not born with a large brain either.

My wife's toddlers are smarter than him.

And Stan... He thinks he's an artist.

But he's just lazing around in the social hammock.

What?

Did he mean that?

Traitor.

So...

if it wasn't for me, they'd all be in jail.

Or worse. Drugs and all that.

Sometimes I'd like to have a little more distance, but...

Can you just leave those poor souls to their plight?

Poor souls?

It's not easy, you understand?

Not easy.

OK.

OK, that's just about...

Illegal junk, or what?

Social hammock, or what?

What about those smart toddlers?

But how do you know...?

Damn it, my suit.

- Guys, that was... - You should be ashamed of yourself.

- Traitor. Really. - But I...

If only Dad could see you now.

Bugger off, man.

Rather have no house than share with a traitor.

- I didn't mean it that way. - Come on.

- Come on, sweetie. - You're going to sort this out now!

- Damn those marks... - Don't mention those marks.

Do what you like,

but without this house we'll be in the shit for another 20 years.

- It's not going to end like this. - Won't it?

Have you ever seen your brothers so disappointed?

No.

- Nur. - Yes?

I found this in the laundry basket.

Lipstick.

- Is that Stan's? - Yes.

And he's booked a city trip to Paris.

- Paris? Lovely. - No, not lovely!

Look at the date. I wanted to do something with him.

But he had a workshop. All weekend.

- He wasn't going to Paris with me. - OK. Code red, my child. Action.

Ring him and say it's all or nothing.

- Yes? - Who is it?

Stan.

Yes, Stan, who are you cheating on me with?

What are you talking about?

- Right on our first anniversary. - I'm not cheating on you.

I love you.

- Ask him who he's with. - Who are you with, right now?

Just a mate. You don't know him.

- Typical. Ask to speak to him. - Can you put him on?

Not possible. He's busy.

Busy doing what? Put him on right now!

Katootje... It's not possible.

Say hi to that bitch from me.

- I'm going to Mum's. - What?

Have a great time in Paris!

Charlotte. Mrs Jacobs. Welcome!

I mean, thanks for seeing me.

Mr Vrancken, I don't see what could be so urgent.

- It's a bit strange right? - Test...

- Come on, try your hardest. - I'm curious.

I haven't got much time.

I would like to explain a number of things in my test.

It's too late for that now.

I didn't tell you the whole truth about my brothers.

And specifically not about Peter, I guess?

Here...

Kick someone else.

Do you know each other?

All right.

About those Daltons, I thought it was part of the assessment.

To test how I function under stress.

Keep your head cool, and keep track of the truth.

Because of the term "Dalton"...

I thought you linked it to negative connotations.

That's why I decided to formulate a negative answer.

- Thesis, antithesis, synthesis. - Mr Vrancken...

- But in reality, my three brothers... - Are absolute treats.

...are absolute treats.

One is an amazing logistics expert.

An undiscovered artist with lots of potential.

And a guy with a heart of gold,

the best DJ ever for all your parties.

Not for the mayor's ball, bunch of old farts.

Perhaps not for the mayor's ball.

But that's because of the age of those attending.

Guys...

I love you.

- I really do. - That's what you say now.

- Before you lose your inheritance. - No, really. I mean it.

Sorry.

Apology accepted, Jan.

Jan, apology accepted. Over.

Mr Vrancken, that answer was not part of your exam.

To be honest, I'm barely interested.

Well...

How...

did I do?

It was a disaster, Mr Vrancken.

Do you know what barely interests me?

Your director's position. You can stick it, Mrs Jacobs.

I don't want to know what mark I got.

Those procedures only split up families.

Well said.

Hey, Jan. Something else. Over.

Repeat after me,

I apologise for the accident with the Tamagotchi.

Over.

- Jan? - Come on, Peter.

- Kato. - Now you respond when I call you.

- Let me explain. - I know all I need to know.

- And don't you dare follow me. - Come on.

- You're not even following me. - You told me not to.

Who'd want to be deputy?

You did your best. In your own way. That's what counts.

Yes, Jan.

You have to aim high, for the top.

- That's right. - Calm down, Peter.

Those other roles aren't important.

Thanks.

Really, thanks.

Come here.

Yes!

Peter, man!

Peter, my hair. Oh, damn it.

Stan?

What's up with you?

Look, all this red stuff, it's paint. You can see that, right?

Sorry.

Sorry I was so harsh.

I love you.

Can you trust me again?

Oh, surprise.

Paris?

I was meant to have a good time in Paris, remember?

- But we can't afford this, can we? - I won the lottery.

- Really? - 800 euros.

So that's just enough for an ice cream in Paris.

Hey, Charlotte.

Yes. You too.

No, but I really have changed.

I'll prove to you that I can look after something.

Don't worry.

Over.