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1
00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:20,986
So, we're walking
on the pier.
2
00:00:20,988 --> 00:00:22,454
It was beautiful.
It was perfect.
3
00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:24,356
The sun was going down.
She looked amazing.
4
00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:26,125
I kiss her.
5
00:00:26,127 --> 00:00:29,228
Best kiss ever.
Hands down.
6
00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,296
And then
two black people walk by,
7
00:00:31,298 --> 00:00:32,631
And she says the n-word.
8
00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:33,966
Billy: W-what?
9
00:00:33,968 --> 00:00:35,901
Like the n-word,
n-word?
10
00:00:35,903 --> 00:00:37,736
Is there another n-word?
She just said the n-word.
11
00:00:37,738 --> 00:00:39,171
No, how did she say it?
12
00:00:39,173 --> 00:00:41,407
Like paula deen and kramer
talking in a car.
13
00:00:41,409 --> 00:00:42,574
Wow!
14
00:00:42,576 --> 00:00:44,410
Have you had sex
with her yet?
15
00:00:44,412 --> 00:00:45,411
No.
16
00:00:45,413 --> 00:00:46,912
Why not?
17
00:00:46,914 --> 00:00:48,914
'cause she's racist, and I --
I really like her.
18
00:00:48,916 --> 00:00:50,549
So, I'm trying to wait.
19
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:53,218
Aw, jim's in love
with a racist.
20
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:54,653
I'm not in love
with a racist.
21
00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:56,388
I like a girl
who happens to be a racist.
22
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:57,756
Look, jim.
23
00:00:57,758 --> 00:01:00,159
If you really like her,
just talk to her.
24
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:01,560
But why does she
have be racist?
25
00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:02,928
Maybe it's just
black people.
26
00:01:02,930 --> 00:01:05,264
She hate hispanics and arabs
and jews, too?
27
00:01:05,266 --> 00:01:08,067
Maybe she shaves her pubes
into a hitler 'stache!
28
00:01:08,069 --> 00:01:09,334
Heil, pussy!
29
00:01:09,336 --> 00:01:11,270
Pussolini!
30
00:01:11,272 --> 00:01:13,505
Do not call my girlfriend's
pussy a dictator.
31
00:01:13,507 --> 00:01:15,441
Maybe she's got tourette's.
32
00:01:15,443 --> 00:01:18,444
Wouldn't that be great?
33
00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:20,779
Why do people give that word
so much power anyway?
34
00:01:20,781 --> 00:01:23,048
Black people call each other
that all the time.
35
00:01:23,050 --> 00:01:24,950
Call each other what?
36
00:01:24,952 --> 00:01:26,285
What? When --
what, now? Sorry.
37
00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:27,719
Black people
call each other what?
38
00:01:27,721 --> 00:01:28,954
Yeah, steve.
39
00:01:28,956 --> 00:01:30,689
What do black people
call each other?
40
00:01:32,125 --> 00:01:33,258
Don't.
41
00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:34,393
Steve?
42
00:01:34,395 --> 00:01:37,896
Brother, s-sister,
homeboy.
43
00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:39,264
Blood?
44
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:40,632
That wasn't what y'all
were talking about.
45
00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:42,601
I really like
billy's blanket.
46
00:01:42,603 --> 00:01:45,104
It's very f.D.R.
47
00:01:45,106 --> 00:01:46,939
Whatever.
48
00:01:46,941 --> 00:01:48,807
Maybe I can change her.
49
00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:50,309
Now you're talking crazy.
50
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:52,811
Steve? Steve?
51
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:56,215
I know,
no drinking before dark.
52
00:01:56,217 --> 00:01:57,883
It's a stupid rule.
53
00:01:57,885 --> 00:02:00,319
Not a stupid rule.
It's a good rule.
54
00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:01,820
You pinched
the mail lady's ass.
55
00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:03,388
She's so hot, though.
56
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:06,024
Yeah, but we need
our mail, dickhead.
57
00:02:07,494 --> 00:02:08,794
Hello, ma'am!
58
00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:10,629
Welcome to discount
save and sell.
59
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:12,764
Here's a basket for you.
Nice tube top.
60
00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:13,999
Good choice for you
today, huh?
61
00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:16,235
Yeah, who cares
what society thinks?
62
00:02:16,237 --> 00:02:18,337
Good for you.
You be comfortable!
63
00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:20,005
Great g-string.
64
00:02:20,007 --> 00:02:23,308
Yeah, take your time, sir.
We're open till 9:00.
65
00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:25,244
Good to see
you're getting out!
66
00:02:25,246 --> 00:02:26,478
Huh?
67
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:27,846
Oh, you know,
so close to death and all.
68
00:02:27,848 --> 00:02:29,982
Get out there, buddy.
Live!
69
00:02:29,984 --> 00:02:32,518
Screw you, asshole.
70
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:34,319
Walter,
what's going on here?
71
00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:37,356
He just said I was near death,
this asshole.
72
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:39,191
Sir, very sorry.
73
00:02:39,193 --> 00:02:43,162
Uh, here's a coupon for 20% off
your visit today.
74
00:02:43,164 --> 00:02:44,696
That guy just gave me
the finger.
75
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:46,198
What's wrong
with people today?
76
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:47,366
Walter?
Huh?
77
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:50,169
Can I see you
in my office?
78
00:02:50,171 --> 00:02:52,337
How do I look?
Billy: I don't know.
79
00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:53,839
You should try something
in white.
80
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:54,940
you have a sheet?
81
00:02:56,644 --> 00:02:58,710
That's her.
Behave.
82
00:02:58,712 --> 00:03:00,279
Got it --
don't offend the racist.
83
00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:04,483
Hey, guys.
Hi, walter.
84
00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:06,051
Hey, dad.
Hey, jimmy.
85
00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:08,387
So, thought I'd stop by
to celebrate.
86
00:03:08,389 --> 00:03:09,555
Celebrate what?
87
00:03:09,557 --> 00:03:11,223
My retirement!
88
00:03:11,225 --> 00:03:12,524
Yeah?
89
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:13,959
Yeah.
No more rat race for me.
90
00:03:13,961 --> 00:03:15,527
No, sirree, bob.
91
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,196
So, how about a beer?
92
00:03:17,198 --> 00:03:19,731
Screw the beer!
Let's do shots!
93
00:03:19,733 --> 00:03:20,899
Oh, there you go!
94
00:03:23,503 --> 00:03:24,636
Ohh.
95
00:03:26,207 --> 00:03:27,506
What do you say, guys?
96
00:03:27,508 --> 00:03:29,208
Let's go on a pub crawl, huh?
97
00:03:29,210 --> 00:03:30,576
I'm in.
98
00:03:30,578 --> 00:03:31,877
Huh? Huh? Huh?
Jim?
99
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,245
Not for me.
I got a date tonight.
100
00:03:33,247 --> 00:03:34,479
Oh, yeah?
Who's the lucky lass?
101
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,048
Sara, with an "a."
102
00:03:36,050 --> 00:03:37,749
Yeah, dad. You know sara.
She's danny's sister.
103
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:38,917
Oh, right, the bigot!
104
00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,486
You -- you know?
105
00:03:41,488 --> 00:03:43,755
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Well, I'm used to it.
106
00:03:43,757 --> 00:03:46,225
You know, your mother
she gets racial.
107
00:03:46,227 --> 00:03:49,261
Oy, give her a snoot full,
my god.
108
00:03:49,263 --> 00:03:51,263
Oh, she has it in for the irish.
Dad, what is the point?
109
00:03:51,265 --> 00:03:53,865
We all have flaws,
all I'm saying.
110
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:56,868
All my flaws together
don't equal racism.
111
00:03:56,870 --> 00:03:59,905
Jim, it's okay to want more
out of your life.
112
00:03:59,907 --> 00:04:02,941
But you're at the danger point
of having too much freedom.
113
00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:04,676
You get so set in your ways
114
00:04:04,678 --> 00:04:07,746
You'll never gonna have
any meaning in your life.
115
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:10,349
You lucky bastard, you.
116
00:04:10,351 --> 00:04:12,517
where you taking her?
117
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:15,454
Uh, I'm hoping that she'll be
happy to stay here.
118
00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:16,855
Oh.
119
00:04:16,857 --> 00:04:18,357
So I can keep the date
120
00:04:18,359 --> 00:04:22,694
In a controlled environment
where it's...White.
121
00:04:22,696 --> 00:04:25,631
Good thinking.
But do not watch television.
122
00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:28,467
There's an inordinate amount
of commercials
123
00:04:28,469 --> 00:04:30,135
Featuring afro-americans.
124
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:32,571
The ratio is way
out of proportion
125
00:04:32,573 --> 00:04:35,474
To their actual existence
in the populace.
126
00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:37,476
what's out of proportion
in the populace?
127
00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:39,811
Well, the coloreds.
Hey!
128
00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:41,446
Hey!
Sara's here!
129
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,914
Come in. Come in.
Come in. Come in.
130
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:46,318
Okay, sara,
this is, uh, walt, obviously.
131
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,287
You know steve.
132
00:04:48,289 --> 00:04:49,821
Billy.
Hi, sara.
133
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:52,958
Sara, have you ever
met...Ramona?
134
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,227
Yes, we've met.
Hello.
135
00:04:55,229 --> 00:04:57,396
Hi.
136
00:04:57,398 --> 00:04:59,331
Well, what do you say,
guys? Let's go!
137
00:04:59,333 --> 00:05:00,832
Go on our pub crawl!
138
00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:02,501
Yeah, ramona.
You're coming with us, right?
139
00:05:02,503 --> 00:05:03,669
I'll never turn down
a drink.
140
00:05:03,671 --> 00:05:05,304
Pub crawl!
Wahoo! Yay!
141
00:05:05,306 --> 00:05:07,606
Ramona? Ramona,
you're coming with us.
142
00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:10,008
There you go.
You get a free drink on me.
143
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:11,843
We have a kitchen here.
All right.
144
00:05:11,845 --> 00:05:13,912
Billy:
Hey, give me a shot.
145
00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:16,181
Walter: Yeah, good call.
Good call.
146
00:05:16,183 --> 00:05:19,685
How about, uh, three --
no, four jaegermeisters?
147
00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:21,353
And another good call.
148
00:05:21,355 --> 00:05:24,089
Yes, jaegermeister!
Ha--
149
00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:27,259
This guy looks like todd.
150
00:05:27,261 --> 00:05:28,827
Shut up, ste--
151
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:31,763
Wow!
He does look like todd!
152
00:05:31,765 --> 00:05:35,200
Son, any man who takes a woman
off your hands
153
00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:36,835
Is doing you a favor.
154
00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:40,138
Not todd, dad.
155
00:05:40,140 --> 00:05:41,873
Not todd.
156
00:05:48,514 --> 00:05:50,048
Gah, ge-- go-- food.
157
00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:51,049
Mnh!
158
00:05:51,051 --> 00:05:52,851
All right.
159
00:05:56,723 --> 00:05:58,023
$26.44.
Hey. All right.
160
00:05:58,025 --> 00:06:00,926
Yeah, you keep
that change there.
161
00:06:02,729 --> 00:06:04,062
Hey, hey. Yeah.
162
00:06:04,064 --> 00:06:05,230
Who was that?
163
00:06:05,232 --> 00:06:08,200
Uh, delivery...Guy.
164
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:09,301
This guy
keeps looking at me.
165
00:06:09,303 --> 00:06:10,235
Billy: Huh?
166
00:06:10,237 --> 00:06:11,136
Ah, shit.
167
00:06:11,138 --> 00:06:12,738
Steve's got the gaze.
168
00:06:12,740 --> 00:06:16,575
Walter: Yeah, you're right.
Well, I'm a peaceful guy.
169
00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:18,543
But if you want to crack him
one, you go right ahead.
170
00:06:18,545 --> 00:06:20,145
I got your back.
Me too.
171
00:06:20,147 --> 00:06:22,347
Billy: No, no.
Stop encouraging him.
172
00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:23,582
You got a problem?
173
00:06:23,584 --> 00:06:25,217
Problem? Nope.
174
00:06:25,219 --> 00:06:26,485
Yeah?
You're gonna have a problem.
175
00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:27,919
Oh, yeah?
A big problem.
176
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:29,554
Why?
Because
you're looking at me.
177
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,022
Me, too.
178
00:06:31,024 --> 00:06:32,891
I'm looking at you
'cause you're looking at me.
179
00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:35,761
Which came first?
Nobody knows.
180
00:06:35,763 --> 00:06:36,928
Can I piss now?
181
00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:38,663
Yeah, you go piss.
182
00:06:38,665 --> 00:06:42,067
Yeah. Go make pee-pee with
your little girly vajayjay.
183
00:06:45,104 --> 00:06:47,606
Sara.
184
00:06:47,608 --> 00:06:49,574
You're...So beautiful.
185
00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:52,277
It...Um...
186
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:55,614
I, um...
This is hard for me.
187
00:06:55,616 --> 00:06:59,384
I've been wanting to say this
to you for a while,
188
00:06:59,386 --> 00:07:03,455
And I just haven't gotten
the guts up to say it.
189
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:06,124
The other day, when we were
walking along the pier,
190
00:07:06,126 --> 00:07:09,861
And we kissed, and...
191
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:13,899
Stop. I think I know
what you're gonna say.
192
00:07:13,901 --> 00:07:15,600
Oh, good.
193
00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,135
And I felt it, too.
194
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:20,305
I think about you
all the time.
195
00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:27,813
And I know it's crazy and
really, really fast, but...
196
00:07:27,815 --> 00:07:30,482
We have this huge thing
in common...
197
00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:31,817
Yeah, but...
198
00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:33,985
This thing that
nobody understands.
199
00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:34,820
Mm-hmm.
200
00:07:34,822 --> 00:07:35,954
Hey, todd.
201
00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:37,889
Hey. Hey.
Don't -- don't touch me.
202
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:39,491
Hey, dude. You're todd.
I'm not todd.
I don't know who todd is.
203
00:07:39,493 --> 00:07:41,460
This is not gonna end well.
204
00:07:41,462 --> 00:07:42,828
You saying you don't know
who I?
205
00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:45,497
You took my wife and my kid --
ow! Ohh!
206
00:07:45,499 --> 00:07:48,500
I don't know who todd is!
207
00:07:48,502 --> 00:07:49,835
Oh, you better kill me.
208
00:07:49,837 --> 00:07:50,836
What are you doing?!
209
00:07:50,838 --> 00:07:52,003
Simmer down, oprah!
210
00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:53,138
Who are you calling
oprah?!
211
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:54,506
Ramona, I got it.
212
00:07:54,508 --> 00:07:55,507
Ow!
213
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,008
Call me oprah!
214
00:07:57,010 --> 00:07:59,478
Give me some of that!
Give me that! You're todd!
215
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:02,747
Sara, I -- I...
216
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:04,983
I'm sorry.
217
00:08:12,326 --> 00:08:13,692
You hit my dad!
218
00:08:13,694 --> 00:08:15,494
We had a fight.
Um, we got a problem.
219
00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:18,163
Call me back.
Hang it up.
220
00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:19,264
Try it again.
221
00:08:19,266 --> 00:08:22,033
And the way you care
for billy...
222
00:08:22,035 --> 00:08:23,435
well, that's --
223
00:08:23,437 --> 00:08:26,037
You got to accept people
for what they are.
224
00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:27,372
Son of a bitch!
225
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,877
Ramona: Ooh!
226
00:08:31,879 --> 00:08:33,945
you all right?
227
00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,881
Let's eat this food
before it gets cold.
228
00:08:35,883 --> 00:08:38,884
Yes, okay.
What have we got here?
229
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:43,221
Huh, chink food
delivered by a beaner.
230
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:45,056
Only in l.A.
231
00:08:46,627 --> 00:08:49,561
But me hungry long time.
Ahhh.
232
00:08:49,563 --> 00:08:51,196
Yep.
233
00:08:59,740 --> 00:09:01,239
What are you looking at?!
234
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:03,675
You never seen somebody
in a wheelchair?!
235
00:09:03,677 --> 00:09:05,510
Get out of the road!
Oh, screw you!
236
00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:06,478
Asshole.
237
00:09:07,915 --> 00:09:10,315
Oh, no.
238
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:12,484
Hey, what are you doing
in the middle of the street?
239
00:09:12,486 --> 00:09:16,855
the sidewalk
has too many cracks in it.
240
00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:19,858
I'm on my way home to blink out
a letter to my congressman.
241
00:09:20,928 --> 00:09:22,527
You been drinking?
242
00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:25,564
Yes, sir, I have.
243
00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:27,265
Okay, well, I got to ask you
to pull over.
244
00:09:27,267 --> 00:09:28,433
I got to give you a citation.
245
00:09:28,435 --> 00:09:29,734
Okay, I'll pull over,
246
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:31,836
But got to warn you,
I may shit myself.
247
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:34,773
Okay.
248
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:36,408
Look, let's just make this
a warning, all right?
249
00:09:36,410 --> 00:09:38,009
Okay.
250
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,444
Please get your ass
out of the street.
251
00:09:39,446 --> 00:09:41,012
I'm going home right now.
252
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:42,414
Thank you for your service,
officer.
253
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:54,059
Look at you.
Big men, are we?
254
00:09:54,061 --> 00:09:56,061
Come on. Get your stuff.
255
00:09:56,063 --> 00:09:58,229
Jim: I don't have time to be
picking you idiots up.
256
00:09:58,231 --> 00:10:00,031
I was having a lovely night
at home.
257
00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:01,533
She s-say anything
racist yet?
258
00:10:01,535 --> 00:10:02,934
Ramona: What?
259
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:06,538
The chick da--
he's dating a racist girl.
260
00:10:06,540 --> 00:10:08,773
You're dating her?
261
00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:12,043
She's not a racist.
She's just uneducated.
262
00:10:12,045 --> 00:10:13,712
You know, maybe she says
a few stupid things
263
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:17,382
From time to time,
but, you know, she's harmless.
264
00:10:17,384 --> 00:10:19,117
Come on, jim.
265
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:21,653
Why don't you just grow a pair
and admit the fact
266
00:10:21,655 --> 00:10:24,389
That you're ignoring it
because you want to tap that?
267
00:10:24,391 --> 00:10:27,058
If you really must know,
it's playing on my mind.
268
00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:28,259
Well, it should.
269
00:10:28,261 --> 00:10:30,095
'cause it's far
from harmless.
270
00:10:30,097 --> 00:10:32,430
Yeah, I know.
271
00:10:32,432 --> 00:10:34,933
When I was a little girl
growing up in macon, georgia,
272
00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:37,335
All I wanted was
to play the first chair
273
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:39,270
In the middle school
orchestra.
274
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,906
But I didn't get it.
275
00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:44,009
And I went to go talk
to the teacher.
276
00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:45,777
When I was coming
around the corner,
277
00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,912
And I heard her say
to another teacher,
278
00:10:47,914 --> 00:10:50,515
"there's no way
that some little nigger girl's
279
00:10:50,517 --> 00:10:52,017
Gonna play first chair
for me."
280
00:10:53,786 --> 00:10:56,621
I'm sorry, ramona.
281
00:10:56,623 --> 00:10:59,357
I get it.
I really do.
282
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:02,861
I bet they gave it
to an asian kid.
283
00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,800
Bed.
284
00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:09,768
Sara?
285
00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:11,536
Sara:
I'm in your bedroom.
286
00:11:11,538 --> 00:11:13,672
You got
to talk to her, jim.
287
00:11:13,674 --> 00:11:16,708
Yeah, she's right, jim.
You know she's right.
288
00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:19,377
Hey, ramona, let's go have
a nightcap in the yard, huh?
289
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:21,646
You know, that sounds
like a good idea.
290
00:11:21,648 --> 00:11:25,116
Hey. You've got
to stand up to her.
291
00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:26,284
Tell her she's a racist.
292
00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:28,820
Shh! She's just in there,
okay?
293
00:11:28,822 --> 00:11:30,488
You got to tell her.
294
00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:32,323
Can't we all
just get along?
295
00:11:32,325 --> 00:11:35,460
Yeah, okay.
Now you're quoting rodney king.
296
00:11:35,462 --> 00:11:37,195
Sara, can you come out here,
please?
297
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,563
We need to talk.
298
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:45,103
Ohh. I'm sort of done talking
for the night.
299
00:11:48,007 --> 00:11:51,476
Okay.
300
00:11:55,047 --> 00:11:56,181
Oh, geez.
301
00:11:56,183 --> 00:11:57,482
Yeah, no one wants
to see that.
302
00:11:57,484 --> 00:11:59,017
You don't want a photo?
303
00:12:00,687 --> 00:12:02,020
Sorry about that.
304
00:12:02,022 --> 00:12:03,188
Thank you
for last night.
305
00:12:03,190 --> 00:12:06,024
No, thank you.
306
00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:08,493
That was fun.
Call me later.
307
00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:11,162
Yeah, you'll be lucky.
Bah.
308
00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:14,933
You got any gatorade?
My electrolytes are low.
309
00:12:14,935 --> 00:12:16,167
Here, drink this.
310
00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:18,703
It's close enough, I guess.
311
00:12:18,705 --> 00:12:20,238
Did you do it, man?
Did you get laid?
312
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,340
Can you --
got to use a glass.
313
00:12:22,342 --> 00:12:23,842
Come on.
Seriously.
314
00:12:23,844 --> 00:12:25,877
they're all dirty.
315
00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:27,078
So you like her?
316
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,881
Yeah, I do.
Yeah, I really do.
317
00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:32,217
I was hoping
she was gonna be bad in bed,
318
00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:33,585
But she's excellent sex.
319
00:12:33,587 --> 00:12:36,955
So, that's a shame.
320
00:12:36,957 --> 00:12:39,724
Remember that dog we had that
only barked at black people?
321
00:12:39,726 --> 00:12:43,094
Blackie.
I loved blackie.
322
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:44,596
He just didn't know
any black people.
323
00:12:44,598 --> 00:12:47,398
Yeah, we -- we got blackie
used to black people.
324
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:48,700
Uh, I don't follow.
325
00:12:48,702 --> 00:12:50,235
What we do is
326
00:12:50,237 --> 00:12:52,704
We just get sara to hang out
with some people of color,
327
00:12:52,706 --> 00:12:54,205
And eventually she'll realize
she's off base in this.
328
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:55,740
That's what I was saying.
329
00:12:55,742 --> 00:12:57,776
This is a great idea
I've just had -- blackie.
330
00:12:57,778 --> 00:12:59,410
No, that's my idea.
331
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:01,079
Yeah, but who do we get
to hang out with her?
332
00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:02,747
Ramona.
No, we can't use ramona.
333
00:13:03,717 --> 00:13:04,783
Janice: Walter!
334
00:13:04,785 --> 00:13:06,584
Oh, god.
335
00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:08,419
Walter! I know you're there,
because your car is in front!
336
00:13:08,421 --> 00:13:09,621
Take your own advice,
all right?
337
00:13:09,623 --> 00:13:11,222
You stand up for yourself.
Retired man.
338
00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,224
Don't let her push you around.
Steve! Open this door.
339
00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:15,393
Hi, mom.
Ow!
340
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:18,296
What the hell happened
to your eye?
341
00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:19,964
Bar fight.
342
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,833
Well, of course, because
you were drinking with jim.
343
00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:23,134
Not drinking with me.
344
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,769
I was home,
having sex with a racist.
345
00:13:24,771 --> 00:13:26,404
He was out with me, okay?
346
00:13:26,406 --> 00:13:27,939
Great!
Ow! Headache!
347
00:13:27,941 --> 00:13:28,473
By the way, the save and sell
called this morning.
348
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:29,808
Oh, yeah?
349
00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:31,776
They said that
they want their vest back
350
00:13:31,778 --> 00:13:33,778
Because you walked out with it
when you were fired!
351
00:13:33,780 --> 00:13:34,779
Fired?
352
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:36,114
Nah, he's retired.
353
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:37,916
Yeah, well, not so much.
354
00:13:37,918 --> 00:13:40,819
We will have this discussion
when we get home!
355
00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:43,321
No.
356
00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:44,589
I'm sorry. What?
357
00:13:44,591 --> 00:13:45,657
I'm not going
in any car.
358
00:13:45,659 --> 00:13:47,125
I'm not doing any more talking.
359
00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:49,994
I'm staying right here
with jim and steve!
360
00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:51,429
Sorry, that's not an option.
361
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:53,998
Yeah, I know. This place
is small enough already.
362
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,135
I've been putting up with your
crap for 38 years now, woman.
363
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:59,771
I'm going to live my life,
just like jim.
364
00:13:59,773 --> 00:14:01,940
And a little better
than steve.
365
00:14:01,942 --> 00:14:05,210
Well, you have said
your piece.
366
00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:06,477
Have fun, boys.
367
00:14:06,479 --> 00:14:10,315
goodbye.
368
00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:16,354
Oh, look.
She forgot the vest.
369
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:17,322
What a dope.
370
00:14:17,324 --> 00:14:18,857
I've never seen her happy.
371
00:14:18,859 --> 00:14:20,191
It's like
she knows something.
372
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,160
Billy: Guys, I need to go
to the bathroom!
373
00:14:22,162 --> 00:14:23,828
Not it.
Not it!
374
00:14:25,498 --> 00:14:26,497
All right, guys.
Thank you very much.
375
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:28,700
Alan.
376
00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:30,501
Hey, jim jefferies.
377
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:31,836
What's up, bro?
Hey.
378
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:33,304
Hey, man.
379
00:14:33,306 --> 00:14:36,007
That was good, funny stuff.
I really liked it.
380
00:14:36,009 --> 00:14:38,509
Thanks, man.
Uh, how you doing?
381
00:14:38,511 --> 00:14:41,079
All right.
Yeah?
382
00:14:41,081 --> 00:14:43,147
We never hang out
that much, do we?
383
00:14:43,149 --> 00:14:45,149
We should hang out more.
We should have beers.
384
00:14:45,151 --> 00:14:46,184
Let's do it.
385
00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:48,386
Have a beer.
386
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:50,855
All right.
387
00:14:50,857 --> 00:14:53,558
I have a girl coming
who I'm seeing.
388
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,727
And would it be all right
if she joined us?
389
00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:58,329
Ohh. Okay.
Yeah, I get it.
390
00:14:58,331 --> 00:15:00,365
Does she, like, have any, like,
cute, little, white girlfriends
391
00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:01,232
That want some black dick?
392
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:03,201
No, that hasn't come up.
393
00:15:03,203 --> 00:15:04,535
Hey.
394
00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:07,238
Hi.
395
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:08,539
Mmm.
You look great.
396
00:15:08,541 --> 00:15:10,508
Oh, thank you.
This is my friend al.
397
00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:11,709
Al, this is sara.
398
00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:13,077
Sara. It's a pleasure
to meet you.
399
00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:15,346
Mnh-mnh-mnh.
You, too.
400
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:18,917
So, um, al is a comedian,
just did a show,
401
00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:21,185
And, um,
we were just talking.
402
00:15:21,187 --> 00:15:22,687
Great.
403
00:15:22,689 --> 00:15:25,890
Yeah, so I was hoping that
the two of you would meet.
404
00:15:25,892 --> 00:15:27,892
You know,
get to know each other.
405
00:15:27,894 --> 00:15:30,061
You might get along.
406
00:15:30,063 --> 00:15:31,729
I think that you two
would really get along...
407
00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:34,399
If, uh, you just got to know
each other, you know?
408
00:15:34,401 --> 00:15:38,202
Feel each other out,
see if there's a vibe.
409
00:15:38,204 --> 00:15:39,871
Hmm.
410
00:15:39,873 --> 00:15:42,106
Al here is one of the best
comics I've ever seen.
411
00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:43,708
Tremendous comedian.
He's one of my favorites.
412
00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:45,043
I'm his favorite nigga.
413
00:15:45,045 --> 00:15:46,744
ask anybody in this bar.
414
00:15:46,746 --> 00:15:50,381
I'm going go to the ladies' room
and grab a drink.
415
00:15:50,383 --> 00:15:51,916
You guys good?
I'll take a beer.
416
00:15:51,918 --> 00:15:53,384
Of course.
I'm fine.
417
00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:55,620
Uhh.
418
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:59,090
Dude, relax, man.
I get it now, dude.
419
00:15:59,092 --> 00:16:00,892
Oh, god, you do?
Yeah.
420
00:16:00,894 --> 00:16:03,161
She got a black-guy fantasy,
right, you know?
421
00:16:03,163 --> 00:16:05,096
You want to bang her with me,
or, I don't know,
422
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,965
If you're freaky like that,
just watch me bang her.
423
00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,099
I mean,
I'll put on a show.
424
00:16:08,101 --> 00:16:10,568
No, it's not.
The thing is...
425
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:11,803
Jim, spit it out, man,
'cause that was weird as shit.
426
00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:13,271
She's a racist.
427
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:14,939
She's what?!
428
00:16:14,941 --> 00:16:16,274
But I like her, so...
429
00:16:16,276 --> 00:16:18,609
And she's got other
good qualities.
430
00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:21,112
So, I was thinking
if I introduced her to you,
431
00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:22,580
Then she would get used
to black folk.
432
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:24,115
So, your plan is
to indoctrinate her
433
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:25,950
Like you would do a damn dog
on the street?
434
00:16:25,952 --> 00:16:29,654
Ahh, wh--
that was the plan, yes.
435
00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:31,789
You cannot date
racist pussy, man!
436
00:16:31,791 --> 00:16:34,192
Now, you can screw the hell
out of some racist pussy,
437
00:16:34,194 --> 00:16:35,626
But you can't date it!
438
00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:37,628
Because that's gonna make you
a racist.
439
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,797
But I can screw
racist pussy?
Yes!
440
00:16:39,799 --> 00:16:43,334
You can screw all kind
of terrible, horrible pussy.
441
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:46,137
You just don't date it.
Think about it.
442
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:47,672
Casey anthony, jodi arias.
443
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:49,774
I'd love to have sex
with them.
444
00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:52,176
Fine-ass pussy.
But you don't date 'em!
445
00:16:52,178 --> 00:16:54,212
Women date horrible people
all the time.
446
00:16:54,214 --> 00:16:55,813
Women date men
on death row.
447
00:16:55,815 --> 00:16:57,448
That's the difference.
448
00:16:57,450 --> 00:17:00,651
Women date horrible,
terrible people,
449
00:17:00,653 --> 00:17:01,953
Men screw terrible people.
450
00:17:01,955 --> 00:17:03,955
That's true.
I've had a lot of girlfriends.
451
00:17:03,957 --> 00:17:05,556
What's the difference,
though?
452
00:17:05,558 --> 00:17:07,658
They don't become killers
or racist, jim -- we do.
453
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:09,293
Mm-hmm. We do.
454
00:17:09,295 --> 00:17:11,329
Now, quick question for you --
where are your nuts?
455
00:17:11,331 --> 00:17:12,363
They're in my pants.
456
00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:13,698
Are you a man or a woman?
457
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,333
I'm a man.
That answers it.
458
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:16,467
You gotta dump
that racist pussy.
459
00:17:16,469 --> 00:17:17,502
I gotta dump
that racist pussy.
460
00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:18,803
Dump it right now.
Dump it.
461
00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:20,071
As soon as she comes back,
dump it.
462
00:17:20,073 --> 00:17:21,005
When she comes back,
I'm gonna dump it.
463
00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:22,540
Here we go.
Hey.
464
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:24,509
All right.
Here we go.
465
00:17:24,511 --> 00:17:26,811
Your boyfriend just said
you're a racist.
466
00:17:26,813 --> 00:17:27,812
Ahhh...
What?!
467
00:17:27,814 --> 00:17:30,648
I never...
No, I'm...
468
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:33,251
Jim?
I never said
you were ra-- liar!
469
00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:35,319
You just said it. Oh, now
the black man's a liar.
470
00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:38,489
See, the thing is,
you're just --
471
00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:42,226
You're, you know, you just blah
out racists words all the time.
472
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,495
And this is how you talk to me
about it?
473
00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:45,596
Yeah.
Using him?
474
00:17:45,598 --> 00:17:47,031
Yeah, well...
Damn.
475
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:49,000
Don't call him "him."
that won't help things.
476
00:17:49,002 --> 00:17:50,835
You might as well
just call him the n-word
477
00:17:50,837 --> 00:17:52,437
And be done with it.
478
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:55,406
Look, I think you're great,
you know?
479
00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:57,341
You're sweet, you're kind,
you're beautiful --
480
00:17:57,343 --> 00:17:58,709
She's also a racist.
481
00:17:58,711 --> 00:18:01,079
But she took care
of her dying brother
482
00:18:01,081 --> 00:18:02,380
For years, you know?
483
00:18:02,382 --> 00:18:03,881
But he is right,
you're a racist.
484
00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:07,718
I'm sorry. It's just
the way I was raised.
485
00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:09,887
My dad is really racist.
486
00:18:09,889 --> 00:18:11,923
But was your mama?
No.
487
00:18:11,925 --> 00:18:13,391
What'd I tell you?
Hey, look.
488
00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:15,560
Sara, as nice as you are,
489
00:18:15,562 --> 00:18:18,062
I don't think
we should go out anymore.
490
00:18:18,064 --> 00:18:21,432
So, that's it, jim?
491
00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:22,700
Yep. That's it.
492
00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:24,902
I'm sorry, sara.
That's it.
493
00:18:27,207 --> 00:18:28,272
That's my beer.
494
00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:30,241
No, it's mine.
495
00:18:39,451 --> 00:18:42,220
I miss racist pussy.
496
00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:44,255
You need to talk to dad.
Why?
497
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:46,958
I love him to pieces,
but he's driving me nuts.
498
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:49,160
He takes forever
in the bathroom,
499
00:18:49,162 --> 00:18:52,763
His special tea smells like ass,
and he whistles constantly.
500
00:18:52,765 --> 00:18:54,932
There's a reason mom made him
live in a tent in the backyard.
501
00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:56,234
You got to tell him
to go home, jim.
502
00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:57,802
Why me, though?
503
00:18:57,804 --> 00:18:59,170
It's your fault
that he's here!
Talk to him.
504
00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:03,474
Hey, guys.
505
00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:05,109
Hey, walter.
506
00:19:05,111 --> 00:19:06,844
I was thinking...
507
00:19:06,846 --> 00:19:07,945
I was thinking, too.
508
00:19:07,947 --> 00:19:10,615
I --
I've spent my whole life
509
00:19:10,617 --> 00:19:13,417
Under the tyrannical rule
of janice.
510
00:19:13,419 --> 00:19:16,354
I worked my tail off,
raised my sons,
511
00:19:16,356 --> 00:19:18,289
And pretty much raised you,
too, jimmy.
512
00:19:18,291 --> 00:19:21,959
You know, maybe we're not as
successful as we want to be
513
00:19:21,961 --> 00:19:26,297
And we all have problems,
sure, some huge,
514
00:19:26,299 --> 00:19:29,934
But when you guys invited me
to stay here with you...
515
00:19:29,936 --> 00:19:31,035
Not invited, exactly
516
00:19:31,037 --> 00:19:32,370
...It just showed me
517
00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:34,138
That, you know,
no matter what happens,
518
00:19:34,140 --> 00:19:37,642
When the chips are down,
my boys have my back.
519
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:40,611
So, thank you, guys.
520
00:19:42,548 --> 00:19:44,048
Jim,
what were you thinking?
521
00:19:44,050 --> 00:19:46,651
I -- I was thinking,
522
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:48,519
Um...
523
00:19:50,956 --> 00:19:53,024
...I could sleep
on the couch.
524
00:19:53,026 --> 00:19:56,160
You could -- you could have
my room if you wanted.
525
00:19:56,162 --> 00:19:57,995
Ah, jimmy.
526
00:19:57,997 --> 00:20:02,133
Geez,
that is such a kind...
527
00:20:02,135 --> 00:20:03,367
What a guy.
528
00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:05,303
Good night, walter.
529
00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:07,205
Alan:
If a chick is super fine,
530
00:20:07,207 --> 00:20:09,507
We'll put up with way more
of her shit.
531
00:20:09,509 --> 00:20:11,642
Think about how that applies to
the worst person ever in life.
532
00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:12,743
Like, think about adolf hitler.
533
00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:15,646
It'd be world leaders talking
to each other like, "look, man.
534
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,148
"we got to stop hitler, man,
535
00:20:17,150 --> 00:20:18,816
"but that bitch look like
she could suck some dick.
536
00:20:18,818 --> 00:20:20,718
Let's get real."
537
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,386
Guys, this has been al jackson.
Thank y'all!
538
00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:24,188
Have a good night!
Thank you so much!
539
00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:25,256
Drive safe!
540
00:20:27,994 --> 00:20:29,927
Hi, sara.
Hi, jim.
541
00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:32,830
I want to apologize.
542
00:20:32,832 --> 00:20:34,165
You were right.
543
00:20:34,167 --> 00:20:36,334
I was right?
Yeah.
544
00:20:36,336 --> 00:20:40,738
I've been...Working on
some of my attitudes
545
00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:42,573
And taking a look
at a lot of things.
546
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:45,343
Ah, this is great.
I...
547
00:20:45,345 --> 00:20:46,510
I have missed you.
548
00:20:46,512 --> 00:20:48,346
I'm dating al.
549
00:20:48,348 --> 00:20:49,614
You're dating who now?
550
00:20:49,616 --> 00:20:51,182
Yo, jim.
What up, man?
551
00:20:51,184 --> 00:20:54,185
Hey, baby.
Hey, bring it on in.
Hey.
552
00:20:54,187 --> 00:20:55,519
Bitch, go wait in the car.
Uh!
553
00:20:57,690 --> 00:20:59,123
You don't have to hit her.
554
00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:00,458
Gonna have fun
with that later. Mnh!
555
00:21:00,460 --> 00:21:01,859
What is this?
556
00:21:01,861 --> 00:21:03,961
You said you couldn't date
racist pussy.
557
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:07,231
Jim, I'm not dating her!
I'm screwing her.
558
00:21:07,233 --> 00:21:09,133
Remember what I said?
559
00:21:09,135 --> 00:21:10,868
Women screw terrible people.
560
00:21:10,870 --> 00:21:12,637
You're a terrible person.
Fo sho!
561
00:21:12,639 --> 00:21:14,772
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
to the stage jim jefferies!
562
00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:15,906
Have a good set.
39042
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