All language subtitles for Ski Party (1965) BR Eng

Snow in the mountains,
really something to see

so wax up your skis
and come along with me

we're all gassed up
and ready to leave

so pick me up about
quarter to three

after skiing all day
and parties at night

with 5 feet of snow,
what a beautiful sight

there's plenty of chicks,
enough for everyone

and even the beginners
will be having fun

the d.j's are saying that
the snow reports are good

we'll get some alcohol
and put it under my hood

we're being left alone
like a ski party should

we'd stay about a
month if we could

after skiing all day
and parties at night

with 5 feet of snow,
what a beautiful sight

there's plenty of chicks,
enough for everyone

and even the beginners
will be having fun

there'll be groovy
little chicks

with sweaters real tight

skiing all day and
having parties at night

gonna ride every lift
while it's still light

we won't be seeing
the sights

after skiing all day
and parties at night

with 5 feet of snow,
what a beautiful sight

there's plenty of chicks,
enough or everyone

and even the beginners
will be having fun

let's have a ski party

let's have a sky party

...and so we see the male
becomes the most romantic

between the ages
of 17 and 19.

Sounds like
my mating call.

Mine's
much noisier.

While the female
doesn't reach her

romantic peak until
her 35th year.

This, as we can
well imagine

presents certain social problems for the college male

such as extreme anxiety, frustration, tension.

All we have to do is find a 35-year-old girl

who doesn't yet qualify under medicare--

sure, there's lots of those gals around.
Just gotta dig a little.

Well, sure.

In the ground,
they're buried everywhere.

Girls, girls,
girls, listen,

i'll tell you
what i'm gonna do

i'll race you to the locker room

and the first girl there gets to buy me dinner.

Hi, men.

Hi!

How does
freddie do it?

We all go to the same school, right?

Right.

Then what are we doing wrong that he's doing right?

I don't know,
why don't we ask him?

Think he'd
tell us?

I don't know. If you were him,
would you tell us?

No,
would you?

No, but it'll give me a good excuse

to break his nose when he doesn't.

Oh, great,
that'll solve all our problems.

That's what john wayne would do.

I don't care what john wayne would do.

Well, i dig him.
We're the same kinda guy.

Sure, you are.
We are.

You know the shaving commercial he does?

Yeah.

We use the same blade exposure, number 5.

Will you look at that?

He's at
it again.

How do you
figure it?

Here we are,
breaking our bones

playing basketball,
football, baseball,

track, and that bum fools around in swimming, tennis,

the chess team, the bridge team.
Hey, wait a minute.

That's it.

That's what?

Don't
you see?

We've been playin' in front of the girls,
he plays with them.

You can say
that again.

How stupid
can 2 guys be?

Todd, let's go
beat him up.

We'll feel better.
Less frustrated.

Calm down, buddy.
Save your energy.

I've finally
done it for us.

Like what? What?

2 dates in a row
with the same girls.

Not those 2 beatniks we met
at the ban the bomb meeting?

No, no. Linda
and barbara.

Linda hughes and barbara norris,
you're kidding?

Great.
Where are we taking the girls tonight?

Tonight?
The date's 2 weeks from next thursday.

...when i tell you this,

but i have been a woman
a long, long time

and never have i felt
like the way i do

when you kiss me.

Oh, she's too much.

Stop it, will you?
Haven't you ever seen

2 people make love
in a sink before?

I'm sorry.

First,
i will start with your toes.

Dry them off first,
dry them off.

Very funny.
$6.85 down the drain.

Will you just listen to those 2 laughing back there?

We gotta be doing
something wrong.

They don't take
us seriously.

What would
freddie do?

First of all,
he'd get the girls to pay for the tickets.

At least we
learned something.

What's that?

The food,
water and climate must be terrific in rome.

Just look at
that great shape

that 35-year-old sexpot's in.

Man, she doesn't
look a day over 19.

Hang on, buddy,
the evening's young.

Be back
in a minute.

Arthur?

Arthur?

Hey, arthur?

Are you a cop,

or somebody who has really run out of gas?

Neither. It's me, todd.
Todd armstrong.

Pull up
a little.

What for?
I'm doing all right.

No, you idiot,
the car.

Oh!

Ask stanley
to pull back.

Come on, arthur.

All right.

Would you excuse
me for a moment,

prof. Roberts?

All right,
now listen.

The last time,
linda and i took a walk

and left you and
barbara the car.

Are you sure?

Positive.
Don't you remember?

When you tried
to kiss her,

she burnt your nose with her cigarette.

Oh, yeah. Then it's my turn.
How long do you think--

half an hour.

Half an hour!
Hey, it's cold out tonight.

Shh!

20 minutes, ok?

Ok. Synchronize
your watch.

11:12 and
30 seconds.

11:12 and
30 seconds.

That's
35 seconds.

11:12 and
35 seconds.

11:12 and 40.

11:12 and--

todd, it's just you and me out here.

Who are we
trying to kid?

I'm getting
out of here!

Oh!

Hey!

Come on, todd!

Todd, stop!

Stop that! Help!

Don't, todd!

Now what's
the matter?

You're
kidding.

Italian movies.

You've been reading
too many books, todd.

But i don't
understand.

Why won't you
let me kiss you?

I don't know,
i--i just don't feel like it.

But why? I
mean, look,

i'm a nice,
clean-cut american boy with a c-plus average.

Oh, look,

i don't know why.

With you, i just
don't feel it.

You mean, not
like freddie, huh?

Oh!

Oh, well,
freddie...

oh, well, freddie.

2,190.

Boy, we are a
couple of losers.

We couldn't even
kiss 'em goodnight.

Kiss them
goodnight?

We couldn't even walk them to the front door.

2,191--
i don't get it.

They said
they like us.

I heard
them say it.

2,192...

hey,

are you sure you weren't listening to the radio?

2,194.

Hey, craig, look
who's coming.

Who? Who? Who?

I promised your housemother

to have you
back before dawn.

Mr. Operator.

Janet, please!
Let me go.

Leave her alone,
you dirty young man, you!

Yeah!

My lips are
exhausted.

Look, you'll have another date with me

again sometime
soon, i promise.

Before we
graduate, anyway.

Just another 5 minutes.
Please, freddie.

Look, we'll have a whole week in the snow together.

Oh, sure,
with indian

and barbara norris
and linda hughes

and all the
rest of them.

A lot of fun
that'll be.

Oh, freddie, do
we have to go?

Yes! Look, janet,

i am president
of the ski club.

If i'm not there
to see that things

run smoothly,
then who will?

Mmm-mmm!

Todd.

Oh, they'll be
back in a week.

Maybe they'll
forget us.

Start packing
warm clothes.

You're kidding.

I'm not
kidding.

But why?

Look, don't argue.
Opportunity is knocking.

Isn't this our first chance to
get involved in a girl-boy sport?

That's not what you're thinking about.
It's the girls.

What girls?
Barbara and linda.

Here we finally
get a 2nd date

with a couple of
beautiful girls.

If they spend a week without us,
in the snow

with freddie, we'll
never see 'em again.

Then what are
we waiting for?

Oh, unless you'd rather hang around here

during mid-term vacation doing push-ups.

You're right.

Oh, uh, uh...

todd.

Yeah?

One problem.

What's that?

We don't know
how to ski.

Don't.
Don't know who,

don't know how.
Did that stop edison?

Did that stop
alexander graham bell?

Oh, well,
as long as those 2 guys are coming.

Just so long as we're not going to be the only 2 there

who don't
know how.

Start packing.

Sunshine,
lollipops and rainbows

everything that's
wonderful is what i feel

when we're together

brighter than
a lucky penny

when you're near,
the rain cloud disappears, dear

and i feel so fine

just to know
that you are mine

my life is sunshine,
lollipops and rainbows

that's how this
refrain goes

so come on,
join in, everybody!

Sunshine,
lollipops and rainbows

everything
that's wonderful

is sure to
come your way

when you're
in love to stay

sunshine,
lollipops and rainbows

everything that's
wonderful is what i feel

when we're together

brighter than
a lucky penny

when you're near,
the rain cloud disappears, dear

and i feel so fine

just to know
that you are mine

my life is sunshine,
lollipops and rainbows

that's how this
refrain goes

so come on,
join in, everybody!

Sunshine,
lollipops and rainbows

everything
that's wonderful

is sure to
come your way

'cause you're in love

you're in love

and love is here to stay

oh, todd!

Oh, just smell
that air.

Look at
the snow.

Look at
that blood.

Well, hi
there, gang.

Gang, welcome. Welcome
to your ski country

where boys
become men

look on
the steps.

It's a bird.
It's a plane.

It's a creep.

Please hurry,
i do not have all day here.

We have
several...

ah.

Now, in there...

is the
infirmary...

how'd he figure that out?

Where we have 3
full-time doctors

setting an average of about 9 broken legs a day.

And, uh,
how are they on broken necks?

Or
black eyes?

We might
just find out.

Now, then,
shall we get to living arrangements?

Oh, i am delighted
to report

that i
have received

letters from all the fathers of the boys

informing me that chaperones would not be necessary.

I like that.

Unfortunately, i have received no similar letters

from the fathers
of the girls.

Therefore, we shall employ the honor system.

Hey, that's great. You trust us and,
in return, we behave.

Just like
west point, right?

Wrong, more
like sing sing.

The boys will be
over here--

oh!

To the right
in rooms 205,

206...

be careful,
this is all very carefully arranged.

Here, now.

It's a tape.
Mail-order psychoanalysis.

Operation
screwball.

But there will be 2 of you to a room, and...

uh, uh...

are you sure?

Of course i'm sure.
I've got it all--

i mean about my father writing you a letter.
He can't write.

His father
can't write.

He only went as far as the 2nd grade,
then he got married.

The--the
2nd grade?

To his teacher.
You know her, todd, my mother.

Oh, yeah.

That nice lady i say hello to
every time i go to your house.

Yeah. Her. My mother.
Your mother.

Would you wait just a moment, please?

Now, look.
The 2nd grade?

That is utterly
impossible.

Oh no, no, it isn't.
He was big for his age.

Yeah, his age.

Oh. Uh, uh...

how old was he?

Or--or
shouldn't i ask?

Either 18 or 23.

It's kind of hard to
tell with my father.

He's got
good bones.

Good bones.

Go--go find--find
your own room.

I-i just
have to...

i've got a hunch he won't be around much longer...

to lock us in our rooms at night.

I see.
I see.

Not as much
as i do.

Oh, wow.

Where are our bathing suits, bobby?

In the green overnight bag, gene.

Um, we'll see
you kids later.

Much later.

I, uh, i
think i'll

get a little more comfortable, myself.

Yeah, that's a
good idea.

Maybe we forgot to brush after breakfast.

Will you just
look at that?

Yes, with just one
thing on their minds.

2.

You're right, indian,
that's all they think of.

What are we
waiting for?

We've got bikinis,
too. Come on.

But i didn't bring
my bathing suit.

That's all right.
I'll lend you a pair of shoelaces.

This is war!

When i touch you

baby, do you like it?

When i kiss you

baby, do you like it?

Well, if you like
the things i do

then i've got
news for you

'cause there's lots,
lots more where that came from

lots, lots more
where that came from

when i hold you

tell me, does
it thrill ya?

When i love you

does it really
kill ya?

Well, if you want
more of the same

just call out my name

'cause there's lots,
lots more where that came from

lots, lots more
where that came from

every time
we kiss

my heart is
really in it

so when we're
like this

let's make the
most of every minute

if you want me

come on, baby, show it

if you need me

just you let
me know it

say that you
want me to stay

and i'll never
go away

and there's lots,
lots more where that came from

lots, lots more
where that came from

yeah, there's lots,
lots more where that came from

lots, lots more
where that came from

lot's more!

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Gene, she says yes
to everything.

I know.
Something's wrong.

What's your
name, honey?

My name is nita.
What is yours?

No wonder she's so friendly,
she's a southerner.

Say, what part of the south are you from, popcorn?

I am from
stockholm.

Stockholm?

All right, please, gang.
Please, gang.

Here are the orders of the day.

Here's what
we're going to do.

In the first place,
i am delighted...

jack! Jack!

Firstly, i'm delighted to tell you

that advanced ski instruction will commence

in exactly...

52 minutes on
slope number 5

for those of our
fellows from the gang

who'd like to brush up for tomorrow morning's activity.

Now, then,
for our pretties over here, ha ha.

We all... oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

We have ski instruction for our pretty ladies

on slope number 6.

Now, then, it
does look like

a rather good
day, doesn't it?

So, let's all go and have fun, fun, fun, hey?

Jeez, don't.

Oh, freddie,
i just love...

why doesn't she leave him alone?

Yeah,
and give us a chance.

I can't look down.

Why not?

My eyeballs
are frozen.

I've heard of 2 guys being close friends,

but this is
ridiculous.

Hey, where
you going?

Back to the lodge.
I just forgot something.

What's that?

I'm a coward.

Come on, craig,
we're only gonna practice.

"Practice."
The last time i heard that was from a football coach

and 10 minutes later,
i had a broken collarbone.

Todd?

Yeah?

Forget it.

A little late,
boys, aren't you?

You and ollie
show us how to bring

an injured skier
off the mountain.

Very sloppy.

Sloppy.
Very sloppy.

Now, let's see if you 2 boys can do a little better than...

achtung!
Voss ich losch!

Boys, boys, come back.

Where are you going?

Ach, just like
stalingrad.

Achtung!
I say, halt!

Coward, this is
your last chance!

I feel like we're in the middle of a world war ii movie.

What's that?

Sounded like
girls laughing.

We must be near
the swiss border.

Now we are going to learn how to do the snowplow.

First we pick up
our poles this way

and we bend
our knees

and point our inner edges in,
this way.

Bend your knees
and bob up and down.

Ah.

This must be
the place.

Yeah, slope 6.

Oh, boy.

Craig, now that's the
way to learn how to ski.

Nice and easy
and slow.

Yeah. Yeah, it's too
bad we're not girls.

You know, a few lessons here,
in the basic fundamentals

and we'd be able to clobber freddie,
like that!

You really think we could catch on that fast?

Are you
kidding?

We're
natural athletes.

We are?

I've got a
great idea.

Just a second.

What're you
gonna do now?

I'll spell "help"
in the snow.

The last time you
had a great idea

i got suspended
for 2 semesters.

Look at the
new competition.

I can't. I
just had lunch.

All right,
now, look.

If we don't
disguise our voices,

we'll never pull
it off, old girl.

Now, once more,
from the top.

The...

"the rain in spain

"falls mainly
in the plains."

Right. Now
the other.

"Hurricanes
hardly ever happen

"in hampton,
hartford or hereford."

"She's got it.

"By george, i
think she's got it."

Thank you.
Nothing.

Tell me, jane,
one question.

What's that, dear?

Do blondes really have more fun?

Tallyho, there.

Toodle-oo.

Tallyho,
there.

The man here
at the lodge said

the girl's ski class is on slope 6.

And since
we're girls--

at least we were the last time we looked.

We thought we might just try our hand at it.

We're here on a
holiday from school.

Just like you chaps or chicks, uh, uh, lassies?

I didn't know there were any
english exchange students here.

Oh, yes, yes,
we exchanged everything.

A long
time ago.

At least 10 minutes.

Shall we?

To the slopes.

Be careful.

What for?

It feels good.

That's right,
very good.

Just keep your toes
pointed like this.

Good, in
the snowplow.

Good, good,
very nice.

Nita,
could you come over here for a minute?

Oh, stay where
you are, jane.

I'll be right
back, just stay.

Hey, hey, don't leave
me like this.

Where's the brakes
on these darn things?

My, your friend's
a fast learner.

Look how
nicely she's doing.

Good show, todd!

Todd?

Todd, uh,
jane todd.

Todd, t-o-d-d,
one of the oldest families in england.

Whoo!

Stretcher bearers!

Stiff upper lip, jane!
I'm coming, old girl.

But you can't
ski either, nora.

Are you serious?
Of course i...

can't.

Nita! Nita!

You keep practicing, girls,
i'll be right back.

Oh, yeah,
yeah.

Jane got away.
Quick, down there.

Why did
she do that?

You tell her to get back here right now, linda.

I've got no time
to argue with you.

I'll get her.

Wait for me,
dearie.

Nora, you
can't ski.

Whoa!

Oh, craig!

Help!

Watch out!

And i'll never cheat
in exams again.

And when i grow up,

i promise never to make a long-distance phone call

and charge it to
a wrong number.

Whoa!

Whoa!

Of course,
keeping all these promises won't be easy.

But i'll try starting
with the easy ones first.

Like, i promise to
brush after every meal.

Yes, that's a
good start.

My lips are
getting chapped.

What good is a book like this without pictures?

All right!
All right!

What's your license number, buddy?

Hey, hey, hey!

What's your phone number, honey?

Say, how would you like a kick in the mouth?

Great. Play hard to get,
'cause i just love it.

You know
something?

No, what's that?

That was
a mistake.

Hey, they don't make girls like you anymore.

Oh, i hope not.

Ha.
Ha.

Whoa!

Oh, jane.

Must have made a wrong turn.

I'll break it.

Ha, ha, ha.
Oh, yeah.

Come on. I
dare you to.

Nora!

For crying out
loud, linda,

will you clear
out of here?

Can't you see we
want to be alone?

Nora!

Sorry, but he tried
to get fresh with me.

I don't like him
at all, jane.

I don't
blame you.

Oh, nora!

How can you talk that way about our freddie?

Why, all the girls in school just love him.

She's right, you know,
every one of them.

Come on, baby.
I'll walk you back to the lodge.

I say there,
but you really do dig pain, don't you?

Oh, nora!

Nora, could i speak to you for a moment?

Privately?

Of course,
my dear.

Toodle-oo.

Oh, hey,
are all you english girls like that?

Oh,
only before we're married.

Yeah, what happens
afterward?

Karate.
Chop, chop!

Looks like i've got to teach you about men, nora.

Men? Ha! I know
all about men.

My governess
told me years ago.

The birds
and the bees.

The bees jump
on the flowers

and get their
feet all sticky,

then they go to
another flower

and get them
even stickier.

Doesn't really sound like very much fun.

Although, i would like to get married someday

if the right bee, uh,
boy should come along.

Well, then, uh,

i don't know how things are done in england,

but, well,
what you just did to freddie

is--is not the way to get and keep a man here.

Oh, tell me more,
linda, please.

All right, but raise
your right hand first.

Oh, this is
so exciting.

Now i want
you to swear,

"i, nora, do solemnly
swear never to reveal

"to any boyfriend,
fiance, husband,

"son or grandson
of mine,

"the following information which i am about to hear.

"So help me
liz taylor."

Liz...

i swear it.

All right,
first...

in order to comply with the government's

request to keep the
population explosion

going at full blast,

the sound will be turned off for the next few moments.

Do you think it
would be all right

if i called jane
over to listen?

She's a girl,
isn't she?

Man, if she isn't,
momsie is going to be awfully upset.

We've been sharing the same nylons for 3 months.

Well, then
she's entitled.

Jane.

Oh, i'm
coming, dear.

Oh, and, uh,
it was fun.

Hey, let's be
better friends.

If only you
meant that, freddie.

I do.

Don't hurt me.

I saw the way you
looked at nora.

Yeah, you're
very perceptive.

With nora, it's...

it's more
than friendship.

Sorry. Still
want to shake?

Oh, well, at least
you're honest.

Sure i do.

Hey, i said
i was sorry.

Painting the town

painting the town

we're gonna turn this whole town upside down

oh, when the
sleigh ride

sure gets cold

when you have
no love to hold

got to find me a love
instead of hanging around

when i find me a love
i'll be painting the town

painting the town

painting the town

we're gonna turn this whole town upside down

oh, mr. Moon's
hanging low

how he shines on
the new fallen snow

and that twinkle
of love in your eyes

makes me feel
reindeer really can fly

gonna try

painting the town

painting the town

we're gonna turn this whole town upside down

got a feeling
i can't hide

when you're right
here by my side

got to live
while you can

instead of
hanging around

if you live
and you love

you'll be
painting the town

painting the town

painting the town

we're gonna turn this whole town upside down

painting the town

painting the town

boy, are you
unoriginal.

All right,
all right.

What do you think of, uh,
finnegans wake?

I didn't even
know he was sick.

That's what i
thought. Come here.

Now you'll have
to marry me.

I heard bells.
I swear it. I heard bells.

How do you like that?

It's the
sleigh, silly.

For a minute there,
i thought you were the avon lady.

I'm beginning
to like you.

What are you gonna
be when you grow up?

When i...

always putting
me on. All right,

go ahead,
if it makes you feel better.

Honestly...

do you really
like me?

You tell me first.

No, i asked
you first.

All right.
I'd marry you tomorrow if i could get a raise.

I didn't know
you had a job.

I don't. I meant a
raise in my allowance.

Oh.

Well,

it's the thought
that counts.

I really do like
you, barb. Very much.

We'll see.

We'll see? W-what
does that mean?

I don't know.

I saw barbara stanwyck say it in a movie once

and she wound up
with cary grant.

One favor, please.

Mmm.

Don't be
funnier than me.

Can i be prettier?

Yes, but
not funnier.

I wouldn't
even try.

Linda.

Linda, i want you to
be my girl. Seriously.

I mean, see only me
while we're up here.

You mean, like, um,
go steady in the snow?

You've got to.

Todd, i don't
"got to" do anything.

You can't tell a
girl to be your girl.

It has to come
from her. Slowly.

You're too anxious.

Yeah, i guess
you're right.

My technique's
nowhere.

You even said it that
night at the drive-in.

Just be honest.

Then linda, what
am i doing wrong?

Oh, i know,
everything.

You always answer
your own questions.

Why do you
always do that?

Then tell me what's the right technique, linda,

to get a girl
to care for you.

A girl like you.

Oh, todd,
a girl doesn't tell a boy something like that.

They don't?

No. They might
tell another girl

how to spot a phony
from a real guy.

Oh, sure. Yeah,
sure, sure.

Women are much too competitive to help each other.

Oh, no.
That's not true.

Why, just
this afternoon,

i was straightening out 2 english
girls about american boys.

You were?

Yeah, i was going
to tell them more

as soon as we get back to the lodge.

I see. Then you'll
probably give them

the rest of the
scoop tomorrow, huh?

Well, actually,
i was going to invite them

up to our
room for cocoa

after the
sleigh ride,

but i don't know
where they live.

Oh, well, uh,
if i see them,

i'll, uh,
i'll tell them to drop over.

Oh, great. They were
really lots of fun.

More than
craig and me?

In a different way.

Never change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em,
they'll always be the same

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em,
it's such a foolish game

never change 'em

no matter what,
what we say

you know they'll
always have their way

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em,
we'll never make 'em see

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em,
it's plain as it can be

never change 'em

we never want
to let 'em go

don't you know
that we love 'em so?

We'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

maybe we should
forget about 'em

maybe we should
say goodbye

what would we
ever do without 'em?

Right or wrong,
we know they're still our guys

right or wrong,
we know they're still our guys

we'll never change 'em,
we feel it deep inside

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em,
they've got to have their pride

never change 'em

we wouldn't try,
if we could

that's why we
want it understood

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em

never change 'em

maybe we should
forget about 'em

maybe we should
say goodbye

what would we
ever do without 'em?

Right or wrong,
we know they're still our guys

right or wrong,
we know they're still our guys

we'll never change 'em,
we feel it deep inside

never change 'em

we'll never change 'em,
they've got to have their pride

never change 'em

we wouldn't try,
if we could

that's why we
want it understood

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

we'll never
change 'em

never change 'em

where did you girls learn how to do the fish?

It was too much.

Do it again!

Hot cocoa,
anyone?

Oh, just what i need
on a cold night.

Me, too.
I'm freezing.

You look warm.

Sure you wouldn't be more
comfortable with that bathrobe off?

Yes, why don't
you take it off?

No! No! No, i'm just fine.
Thank you.

Hey, listen,
speaking of dumb boys,

did i tell you about the time i
taught craig gamble a lesson

for arriving late
on our first date?

No, but we're just dying to hear,
aren't we, nora?

Just dying.

Well, we were parked up on mulholland drive,
in the dark

and he decided
he had to kiss me.

What did
you say?

I said no, naturally.

Boy, that kinsey
was some liar.

What happened?

Well, first of all,
he locked all the car doors

and then he
tried to tie my arms

behind my back
with my hair ribbon.

So, i
fixed him.

I let him
kiss me.

That's
getting even?

I had a cigarette in my mouth at the time.

And his nose and his chin,
and his eyebrows

so, it turned out to be a very passionate kiss.

Oh, you know, boys
are all right.

You just have to watch them every minute.
That's all.

Why, just tonight,
todd tried to put his arm around me.

What happened?

Anybody want a date with a
nice-looking boy with only one arm?

He never tried that again.
At least, not with me.

Is he all right now?

Oh, yes,
he's coming back to school next semester

that is,
if his parole comes through in time.

Oh, well,
it's getting kind of late.

Nora and i had better be going.

Nora!

Tomorrow's
a big day.

Too-too.

Too-too.

Bye.

Pillow fight.

Free for all.

Shall we?

You had to ask.

Ohh! Ohh!

"Never have so few done so much for so many."

Couldn't have put it better myself,
old girl.

Somebody turn out the lights.

Beddy-bye.

Nighty-night,
little angels.

What do
we do now?

Craig.

What's the average
age of our audience?

15?

Out.

No, no, no,
miss sally.

I will not have
every room searched.

That is not
our policy here.

My dear miss
sally, please.

I have an entire
day's activities

uh, to get
started.

Give me a description of the missing articles

and i'll see
what i can do.

Look,
all i want to do is

learn
how to ski,

so i can get
out of costume

and spend some
time with barbara.

After all,
that's why we're here, isn't it?

Not to play
some like it hot.

Besides, this
girdle's killing me.

Today's the
last time.

As soon as we
learn how to ski.

Good morning,
mr. Pevney.

Oh, good morning,
girls.

Lovely day.

Oh, it's, oh,
it's, it's...

too-too.

Too-too.

Smoky blonde...

with little bangs?

What are you doing?
Where are we going?

Shh.

Take off
your wig.

I'll catch a cold.

Boy, do you have
a bad memory.

Operation
screwball.

Oh, yeah. Make
pevney crack.

Into 1,000
little pieces.

Scattered
everywhere.

What are
you gonna do?

Watch.

Softer, swept,

pageboy, in the back.

That--that does
sound nice.

I forgot
something.

No, no.
No, i-i...

look, i'm sure the wigs won't turn up in another state

dyed a
different color.

I know they do that
with stolen cars.

The hot-wig racket?

I see.

I've got
it now.

Say, would you mail
this for me, please?

I presume that means "yes."
Thank you.

I thought i was
getting better.

Come on, mitzer.

Come on, mitzer.

Whoa!

Now, come on,
girls, let's go.

Put your skis on.
Best of luck, then.

Come on.
Hurry, hurry.

You, too, jane,
you get on the skis.

Only this time,
you be more careful.

I'm always careful.

Oh, oh, tell
me, nita,

uh, uh,

you've been here longer than nora and i,
haven't you?

For 3 months.

Well, then, uh,
what's wrong with the american girl?

You know,
it's funny that you ask me that.

I was just going to ask you the same thing.

Games, games.
All they do is play games.

And talk.

Talk all
the time.

You know, in sweden,
it's very different.

In stockholm,
when the boy and girl meet

and they like
each other,

no games and
very little talk.

Yeah!
Yeah!

I dig it. He likes...
she digs, likes it.

"It's the only
way to fly."

Have you
got a friend?

A friend?

Yes, you
know, like, uh,

like nora and
i are friends.

Same town, same
place, same ideas.

Helga, she works
in the town.

Yes, helga?

Well, uh,
would you excuse us for a minute, dear?

Yeah, but you
hurry back

because we start the ski lesson in just 10 minutes.

Yes. Just 10 minutes.
That's it. Yeah.

Now, look,

i'm going back to the hotel to get out of this wig.

But the ski lessons,
i mean, barbara and linda.

That's the
whole point.

I've been thinking about the
secret of freddie's technique.

Now, he has lots
of girls, right?

Right.

Well, then,
don't you see?

Girls are only
interested in boys

that are interested
in other girls.

Oh, i see.

If we go with
nita and helga,

then barbara and linda will become--

absolutely.

Let's go.

Wait a second.

It'll look kind of funny for the both of us

to suddenly disappear as nora and jane

and, 15 minutes later,
come back as todd and craig.

That's no good.
I'll go, you stay here.

Uhh!
I get nita.

Helga.
Nita.

I said helga.

Come on, what
if she's a dog?

Nita! Nita!

Yeah! Yeah!

Tell me about your friend helga.
Is she pretty?

She is a lot of fun.

She's got a
nice personality.

She's a dog.

Well, i'll be back
in 15 minutes.

Listen, when i
come back as me

you don't
know me.

Come on, what do you
think i am? Stupid?

Look, uh, have a
coke or something.

Nothing's going to happen for at least 10 minutes.

Hi, beautiful.

I've been looking
all over for you.

This just isn't
my century.

Have you
been avoiding me?

Like
the plague.

Well, thought you might like to go for a little ride.

Lots of luck!

Oh, ho.

Hot cocoa.
I brought it for you.

Thought you looked in need of a little warming up.

Look, go take your
hot cocoa and...

oh!

Oh, thanks.

Ah, good, huh?

Mmm. Yummy.

You know, you're obnoxious,
but you're not dumb.

You do know
something.

I know how to
treat a woman.

Oh?

How's that?

Why don't you just, uh,
climb aboard,

and, uh, maybe
i'll show you.

I think it would be safer for your bluecross rates

if you told
me instead.

Ok, it's a deal.
You first.

Yeah.

Are you sure you know how to work this--

look. Relax, baby,
will you? Huh?

It's just like
driving a car.

Oh!

Nora! Nora!

Oh, i say, this is fun,

and much safer than skiing.

I guess it just
wasn't meant to be.

Whee!

Beep! Beep!

Whee!

Hi, i didn't know there
was a ski jump over here.

There isn't.

Oh, how wonderfully
thrilling it must be

to go hurtling down a steep,
snow-covered ski jump

and then go
flying into midair.

Hundreds of
people-- freddie!

Help!

Freddie, help!

Remember

to tell

doctor

on next tape...

i had same
dream again.

The one where
my mommy...

wishes i had

been born a girl

instead of a boy.

May i have 2 airmail stamps, please?

Of course
you may.

Here you are.

Thank you.

It's happened!
Look!

It's happened!
Look!

Don't you see?

Mama's wish
has come true.

I'm a girl.

I'm a--i'm
a girl!

Oh, i'm a girl.

Men are
such rats.

Pevney.

You, pevney?

Why you?
What for?

You, too.
You, too.

Ah! You, too.

It's contagious!
It's catching!

That's the
last straw!

That's the
last straw!

Nita?

Ja?

Forget it.

You say it stays
completely dark

for 8 months of the year in stockholm?

This is true.

You must have
big light bills.

No, no, we, uh,
try to keep the lights out

in the house as much as we can during the winter.

You mean to tell me you live
inside the dark for 8 months?

Ja.

You must bump into each other a lot.

No, we do not walk around much in the winter.

And, um...

eat, how do
you eat?

We do not eat
much, either.

But, work?
I'm sure you--

no, we do not
work much, either.

Well, then...

forget it.

Pretending to be secretary of the ski club.

"Golly, miss elksberg.
We just gotta have

"an interview for
the school newspaper.

"Otherwise, nobody will believe we were really here."

I hate him.
He's so obvious.

What did you ever see in him, anyway?

I don't know,
but i do now.

I'd like to have a picture of you for the paper.

Yeah, well,
i have one in my room.

I just felt
you did.

You want i should bring it to you tonight at dinner?

No, i hate to look at pictures while i eat.

By the fire then,
in the lodge.

You meet me
there at 9:00?

Oh, yeah, that'll be great.
Just great.

Just you and me by the roaring fire.
The 2 of us.

We found him
out there.

You better put
him by the fire.

It's
mr. Pevney.

Darn!

We thought it was the abominable snowgirl.

Hey, are you really
the ski patrol?

You were expecting
maybe rock hudson?

Look at
these dogs.

Vodka martini.

Whiskey sour.

Anything
we can find.

That's why we really
came. We needed refills.

Have you saved
many lives lately?

4.

4? How
wonderful. Who?

Well, first there
was barney,

then 2nd,
lloyd,

then me, twice.

Oh, i know who
you really are.

You're james brown
and the flames.

I have all
your records.

Shh. Don't tell
my mother.

She still thinks
i'm in the army.

You're gonna sing for us,
aren't you?

Sure,
come on.

Outta sight.

Oh, i feel good

i knew that
i would, now

i feel good

i knew that
i would, now

so good, so good

i got you

i feel nice

like sugar
and spice

i feel nice

like sugar
and spice

so nice,
so nice

'cause i
got you

when i hold
you in my arms

i know i can't
do no wrong, now

when i hold
you in my arms

my love can't
do me no harm

and i feel nice

like sugar and spice

i feel nice

like sugar and spice

so nice, so nice

i got you

when i hold
you in my arms

i know that i
can't do no wrong

and when i hold
you in my arms

my love can't
do me no harm

and i
feel nice

like sugar and spice

i feel nice

like sugar and spice

so nice, so nice

'cause i got you

oh, i feel good

like i knew that
i would, now

i feel good

i knew
that i would

so good, so good

'cause i got you

so good, so good

'cause i got you

so good, so good

'cause i got you

hey!

Yeah!

Gone.

Gone, lost out there,
somewhere in that wilderness.

Freddie, don't worry about nora too much.
She'll be all right.

She's pretty
tough, you know.

Oh, i know.

That's what i
love about her.

I don' t know why you should be angry with me.

You're right.
I don't even know you that well.

Look, what you do
is your own business.

What did i do?

Nothing.

Except no one,
including me,

has seen you for
the past 24 hours

and 7 people saw nora go in and
out of your room 4 times today.

No--

oh, oh, the little,
uh, english girl.

She's there right now,
isn't she, in your room?

And she went
in at 4:15.

Look, can i help it if todd and i dig european women?

And linda and i
were so nice to them.

Well, what are you
so happy about?

Are you kidding?
You heard barbara.

I'm having a big
scene with myself.

What?

Never mind.

You know,

i don't know
why you 2 guys

even bothered to come up here in the first place.

2 days,
and neither of you has even had the guts

to try on a
pair of skis.

Gin.

We were thinking of going up tomorrow, freddie.

Mmm-hmm.
Well, tomorrow's the club ski-jump championship.

Oh, too bad. Maybe
the day after, then.

We're going back
the day after.

Well, as the dodgers
always say,

"wait till next year."

Chicken.

"Sticks and
stones will"--

you could win tomorrow if you wanted to.

Of course,
i could.

I like
winners.

He's never jumped in
his life. He's afraid to.

That is true?

You're afraid?

Such a waste
of energy.

You jump for me.

But--but--but i...

you win the
championship tomorrow.

You want me to risk my life for a little gold cup?

No, todd, you win
more than the gold cup.

If you win tomorrow,
we play the american game.

Spin the bottle.

Well, what
did you expect?

This is an
american picture.

All right,
i'll jump.

Todd!

That voice sounds
vaguely familiar.

I hate you.

I do hope you win.

Perfect
feminine logic.

"I hate you. I
do hope you win."

That's logical.

We, who are about to watch you die,
salute you.

Until tomorrow.

Well, what choice
did i have?

I don't know.
We could have stayed home and done pushups.

Come on in.

I got it.

It's lucky i remembered the morning weather balloon.

I never knew
helium was so heavy.

Here, bring
it over here.

Let's see. I
got everything?

Mmm-hmm.

This goes in here.

Ok?

Now, let's strap this on with a couple of my belts,

and we'll be
ready to go.

Do you think
it'll work?

Why not? It
works in movies.

Now, our next
contestant is...

uh...

fred car--

fred carter.

Boo! Boo!

Good luck,
freddie.

Luck? Who
needs it?

236 feet.

Our next skier
is, uh, gene rosson.

Last chance,
todd.

Ah, may the
best man win.

Gene rosson,
221 feet.

The leader is
still freddie carter.

Now, the last participant is a new jumper

named, uh...

todd armstrong.

9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, now!

It works!

I wonder if
president johnson

will talk to me
when i come down.

He's still
going up.

Sir isaac newton just turned over in his grave.

Just a little more.

Just a little more.

Whoa!

He's so fat. Why's
he so fat, craig?

What?

Oh, well, he, uh,
had a big breakfast.

Todd always eats a big breakfast before jumping.

Pull the
string, you nut.

The wind's changing.
I'd better pull it.

I can't find it.

Oh! Oh!

The string!
The string!

I can't
find it!

"Play spin the bottle."
I'm a very sick boy.

Oh!

What can
we do?

Well, uh,
when he reaches the coastline,

our radar will
probably pick him up.

Then a couple of jets will take off and shoot him down.

Shoot him down?

Whoa!

You think he's all right?

You all right, todd?

I think
it's broken.

Yeah, it's
broken.

No, my leg.

Ow!

It's broken,
too.

Ow!

Ow!

But, doctor,
i got a date tonight!

A big one.

Can't you just put
a band-aid on it?

I'll come back tomorrow for the splint.

Oh!

Oh!

Todd, you've got
a broken leg.

You can't go
out tonight.

Oh, yes,
i can.

Nita left me a note,
along with a map to her house. Read it.

"Hurry. I am waiting, darling."
Signed, "nita."

"P.s. bring the
milk bottle."

Todd, you can't go
out with that leg.

Craig, if i don't go,
think what it'll do

to the american
image overseas.

Bad, huh?

The peace corps will
have been for nothing.

Oh, and, uh,
don't wait up.

And remember to call linda 10 minutes after i leave

and tell her where i'm heading.
Got it?

Got it.
Got it.

Good luck.

Darned if i'll be without a date our last night here.

Room, uh,
211, please.

Hello, linda?
Is barbara there?

Yeah,
she's here.

How's todd?

In terrible
pain. Terrible.

They gave him something and he
went to sleep for about a half hour.

Then he woke up, got
his milk bottle and left.

Could i speak
to "you know"?

"You know,"
it's craig.

Tell him to get lost.

Barbara.

All right, i'll
tell him myself.

Uh, craig, she says she has a terrible headache.
She'll call you later.

Goodbye.
I'll bet. Thanks a lot!

Room 206, please.

Hello, freddie?
Is that you?

Ah.

Let me see.

"A left turn in the
fork of the road

"across the field."

Ah!

Only about 2
more miles to go.

It can't be much
further. It can't be.

How i love
a challenge.

Get out.

Come in, darling.

Well,

i came as soon
as i could.

Well. Get up.

What for?

The time
has come.

What's
the matter?

Nothing.

Then come here.

You promised to play spin the bottle with me.

I don't understand.

Talk to me.

Talk?

Yeah, like--like you do to the american girls.

I've been watching, and
it looks pretty nice.

Nita.

Nita, don't make fun at a time like this.

I'm not making fun.
I want you to talk to me

and treat me like you
do the american girl.

The ameri...

nita, i thought that we were gonna--

no, first
we talk

and then candy...

and then,
after that, we'll.

Then more talk.

Then, we can
hold hands.

No.

Then you ask for the
kiss on the cheek.

And then, maybe,
the kiss on the cheek.

Then...

then, what
comes next?

I don't know.

That's as far
as i ever got.

Hi.

Now, what are you
doing dressed like that?

We're pinned.

Oh,
congratulations.

I'm sure you and barbara will make a very--

barbara?
What barbara? Freddie.

Oh, come on,
knock it off. Very funny.

I'm not being funny.
He gave me his fraternity pin.

But he can't
do that.

He's a boy and--
and so are you.

We'll work
it out.

You mean that.
I really...

i'm getting you out of here, tonight.
Take this.

Who is it?

What are you doing in there, todd?

I said,
what are you doing in there?

Nora? Nora?

He's so
jealous.

Nora! Nora!

Let's go. Out
the window.

That freddie's
pretty hip.

I've never been treated so nicely in my whole life.

I said, out!

I'm going to do something terrible.

I mean really
terrible!

Better open up, todd!

Todd!

You better
open up!

Freddie thinks i should get a nose job this spring.

I may give you one, tonight.
Let's go.

Nora!

You know,
he comes from a very good family.

His great-great--

shh! In
that window.

Let's go.
Let's go.

The least we can do
is leave him a note.

I said,
let's go.

It just
isn't fair!

Nora!

No!

Nora! Nora!

Taxi!

Where to, buddy?

Just head west.
I'll tell you where to stop.

In. I said, in!

What happens when they arrest us

for not paying
our bill?

We should only get that lucky.

Hello there.

Hello.
Follow that cab.

What are you
talking about?

Just follow
that cab!

I'm a very
sick man.

I don't want to have to ask you again.

All right.
All right.

But at least help me aim it in the right direction.

That's a good boy.
Watch it, careful.

We've got to catch them,
you idiot.

All right.
Let me start it.

Nora!

Bob, wake up
everybody,

and don't forget
the driver!

What for?

Never mind,
go on!

Janet, wake up all the girls and
make sure they're dressed.

Mickey, have the bus brought in front.

Indian, we'll get
the skis and poles.

Nora!

Todd, i was kidding.
You know i was kidding.

You had me scared
there for a minute.

Let's go back.

I'm all right,
todd. I swear it.

You want me to
turn around?

No, wait.
Let me see if that one light's still following.

Come on, turn around.
I was kidding.

You may be kidding.
But that nut on that bike isn't.

Keep going.

Some boyfriends
we picked.

Which one?
Yours or mine?

Both of them.

One runs away with
an english girl,

and the other one
disappears completely.

Well, we did
it to them.

We drove
them to it.

Every time todd put his arm
around me and tried to be nice

i laughed
in his face.

You must
be kidding.

I can't believe
my ears.

You can't, huh?

What next?

Oh, just hang
around.

I don't feel like
laughing anymore.

Is anybody
here?

Look, they must still be sleeping.
It's only 6:30.

Wake up!
Wake up!

We need gas.

Wake up,
i say!

Oh!

Who the devil
are you?

We want some gas.
Would you...

fill her up,
please?

Only takes about 18 cents' worth of regular.

Come on, hurry up.
We don't want her to get away.

Yes, we do.

No, we don't.

Yes, we do.

Come on!

I just don't
know anymore.

Why did they
run off?

You really love
that nut, don't you?

Don't you
love yours?

Yeah, i
guess i do.

I know what
i did wrong.

But i don't know
what you did wrong.

What did you
do wrong?

Guilt by
association.

Listen, have a piece of fruit.
You'll feel better.

Wanna bet?

Hey, look, the
pacific ocean!

You mean, it
didn't move?

Isn't anybody home
at the beach house?

No, dad took mom to
vegas for the week.

We'll have the whole weekend just to sit around

and soak up the
sun in privacy.

Great.

If i see snow again before i'm 60,
it'll be too soon.

Buddy, make a right turn at the brown house.

Park in the
driveway.

You're the boss.

What should i do with these?
Burn them?

Don't waste
a match.

Just throw 'em
on the beach.

When the tide
comes in, poof!

I'll see
you inside.

10 hours
when i wake up.

Look, uh,

use any bedroom on
the 2nd floor.

I'll sleep right on the beach.

Fine, suit
yourself.

You must be pretty tired, too, huh?

I'm bushed.
Could you loan me a blanket?

I could sleep on
the beach myself.

Sure, come on.

Wait a second.

I still got to figure out a way for me to pay you.

How much, $560
something, right?

Yeah.

Look, come on,
it's the hondells.

I told you,
they'd be here the beach house.

There'll be groovy
little chicks

with sweaters
real tight

just skiing all day and
having parties at night

we're gonna ride every lift,
while it's still light

but we won't be
seeing the sights

after skiing all day
and parties at night

with 5 feet of snow,
what a beautiful sight

there it is.

And even the beginners
will be having fun

why don't
you go ahead?

I'll stay here
with you.

Please?

Look, don't...

all right.

It was late at night
when he first hit town

his eyes were
cold and blue

he gunned his bike once,
then he laid it down

like he had
a job to do

the gasser's
what they called him

'cause he always
acted rough

the gasser's
what they called him

'cause he always
acted tough

he'd ridden all night,
all through the rain

though no one
really knew why

he acted real strange
and never gave his name

for he was a real
strange guy

the gasser's what
they called him

'cause he always
acted rough

the gasser's
what they called him

'cause he always
acted tough

no one knew just
where the kid went

when the weather
broke that night

and no one knew how
his time was spent

if he was doing
wrong or right

the gasser's
what they called him

'cause he always
acted tough

the gasser's
what they called him

'cause he always
talked real rough

hi.

Todd?

What are you
doing here?

We followed you.

You mean, all
the way from...

thank you.

Look, i, uh...

i know i don't have any right to ask you this.

But has
she gone?

Nora?

Has she?

Oh, yeah, she's
gone. In fact,

she never was.

Oh, look,

you don't have
to explain.

I was wrong.

Linda,

for once, listen.

There was no nora.
Craig was nora.

Craig?

And i was jane.

Oh!
We really fooled you girls.

It was one
big put-on.

See?

But why?

It could
have worked.

And then freddie
fell in love with nora,

i mean, craig.

And i broke
my leg

trying to make
you jealous.

And then nita,

nita decided to become an american girl.

You mean...

you went to all that
trouble, just for me?

Because you wanted
me that badly?

I'm a wipeout for redheads,
you know that.

Nora!

Hey!

Here, take it.

Nora!

Nora!

Nora! Have
you seen nora?

Have you
seen nora?

None of you
have seen her?

Nora? You haven't
seen her either?

Have you seen her?
She's got hair that sort of, well...

where is she?

Who?

Nora, you
idiot.

Oh, uh, uh,
can you take it, old man?

Hurry up and tell me before i flip out!

Where is she?

Let's have
a talk.

Excuse me for
a second, honey.

Just for
a second.

Come on.

You still haven't
told me a thing.

Why are we
stopping here?

Do these
look familiar?

Nora!

They're nora's.
Where?

Out there
somewhere.

You see,
when she heard you were coming,

she started swimming in that direction.

Right now,
i'd say she was somewhere

between here
and japan.

That's about as
close as i can get.

Oh, no. Nora!

Nora! I'm
coming, darling!

Nora!

Remember, float on
your back, darling,

if you get tired.

If you hurry,
you might catch her somewhere near guam.

Nora, i'm coming, darling!

Pretty mean
thing to do, huh?

Well, don't worry.
We'll tell him the truth tomorrow...

if he comes back.

Dear doctor lansdorf,

i--i really feel that
i am getting better.

Except, doctor,
there are some very strange things happening

like all of a
sudden, the--

the skis have
gotten much fatter.

The d.j.'s are saying that
the snow reports are good

we'll get some alcohol
and put it under my hood

we're being left alone,
like a ski party should

we'd stay about a
month if we could

after skiing all day
and parties at night

with 5 feet of snow,
what a beautiful sight

there's plenty of chicks,
enough for everyone

and even the beginners
will be having fun!

There'll be groovy
little chicks

with sweaters real tight

just skiing all day
and having parties at night

we're gonna
ride every lift

while it's still light

we won't be seeing
the sights

after skiing all day

and parties at night

with 5 feet of snow

what a beautiful sight

there's plenty of chicks,
enough for everyone

and even the beginners
will be having fun

let's have a ski party

let's have a ski party