Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,435 --> 00:00:06,005
[ SKATEBOARDING ]
2
00:00:10,310 --> 00:00:13,812
[ ♪ ]
3
00:00:13,814 --> 00:00:19,818
♪
4
00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:29,795
♪
5
00:00:29,797 --> 00:00:39,838
♪
6
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:49,848
♪
7
00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:59,858
♪
8
00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:09,835
♪
9
00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:19,845
♪
10
00:01:19,847 --> 00:01:29,888
♪
11
00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:39,898
♪
12
00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:49,908
♪
13
00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:59,885
♪
14
00:01:59,887 --> 00:02:09,928
♪
15
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:19,938
♪
16
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:23,308
Andy:
IT IS HERE WHEREOUR STORY BEGINS.
17
00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:28,547
A MAGICAL LAND THAT KNEWPEACE FOR MANY, MANY YEARS.
18
00:02:28,549 --> 00:02:31,283
THE SPORT OF LARPING,ALSO KNOWN AS
19
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:33,152
LIVE ACTIONROLE PLAYING,
20
00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:38,023
WAS ENJOYED ACROSS THECOUNTRYSIDE BY ALL WHO PLAYED.
21
00:02:38,025 --> 00:02:39,892
(Joyful Laughter)
22
00:02:39,894 --> 00:02:41,260
[School Bell Ringing]
23
00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:42,561
♪
24
00:02:42,563 --> 00:02:45,464
BUT A SHADOW SOONFELL OVER THE LAND.
25
00:02:45,466 --> 00:02:50,636
THE DARK ONE, DEREK,BEGAN HIS STUDY OF THE LARP,
26
00:02:50,638 --> 00:02:54,606
TWISTING ITS RULESTO ENSURE VICTORY.
27
00:02:54,608 --> 00:02:57,209
♪
28
00:02:57,211 --> 00:03:00,479
HIS SUCCESSATTRACTED MANY ADMIRERS,
29
00:03:00,481 --> 00:03:03,649
WHO EASILY BECAME ACOLYTESIN WHAT WAS KNOWN AS
30
00:03:03,651 --> 00:03:05,150
THE BLACK CRUSADE.
31
00:03:05,152 --> 00:03:06,752
(Yelling and Cheering)
32
00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:08,554
♪
33
00:03:08,556 --> 00:03:10,389
(Warriors Yelling)
34
00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:15,093
Andy:
AND THE SPIRIT OF THE GAMEWAS LOST WITH THEIR COMING.
35
00:03:15,095 --> 00:03:17,429
FEAR REPLACED FUN.
36
00:03:17,431 --> 00:03:18,964
♪
37
00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:21,800
AND TREACHERYREPLACED TEAMWORK.
38
00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:24,937
♪
39
00:03:24,939 --> 00:03:27,839
HOLY SHIT.
40
00:03:27,841 --> 00:03:30,309
(Applause)
41
00:03:30,311 --> 00:03:33,879
Andy:
DEREK'S GRIP GREWSTRONGER EACH YEAR,
42
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:37,649
UNTIL NONEQUESTIONED HIS MIGHT.
43
00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:41,153
AND YET, WHISPERS OF CHANGEARE HEARD IN THE WIND.
44
00:03:41,155 --> 00:03:42,854
(Crowd Cheering)
45
00:03:42,856 --> 00:03:47,226
CAN IT BE THAT A CHAMPION WILLSTAND AGAINST THE DARK ONE?
46
00:03:47,228 --> 00:03:51,663
AND IF SO, IS THEREANY CHANCE OF VICTORY?
47
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:56,301
[ ♪ ]
48
00:03:56,303 --> 00:04:05,010
♪
49
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:15,053
♪
50
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:23,462
♪
51
00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:26,231
KICKING,
KICKING.
52
00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:27,232
KICKING.
53
00:04:27,234 --> 00:04:28,233
YES. GOOD JOB.
GOOD JOB.
54
00:04:28,235 --> 00:04:30,068
HA, HA, HA.
55
00:04:30,070 --> 00:04:31,770
HA, HA, HA.
56
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,772
HA, HA, HA.
57
00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,474
- HA!
- OH!
58
00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:39,945
♪
59
00:04:39,947 --> 00:04:42,514
[Swords Clanging]
60
00:04:49,355 --> 00:04:51,189
STOP IT, PATRICK,
YOU'RE MAKING ME LOSE.
61
00:04:51,191 --> 00:04:53,091
DON'T BLAME ME
FOR YOUR SUCKITUDE.
62
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:55,594
OH SWEET, I HAVE
A GUN IN EACH HAND.
63
00:04:55,596 --> 00:04:57,029
HAMMER BROTHERS.
64
00:04:57,031 --> 00:04:59,064
[Sword Slash and Screaming]
65
00:04:59,066 --> 00:05:00,299
YOU MADE ME DIE.
66
00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:02,100
I'M JUST TRYING
TO HELP YOU, OSWALD,
67
00:05:02,102 --> 00:05:03,468
IT'S CALLED
NEGATIVE REINFORCEMENT.
68
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,470
LOOK, IF YOU'RE NOT
GONNA RESPECT ME,
69
00:05:05,472 --> 00:05:06,672
AT LEAST HAVE SOME
RESPECT FOR THE GAME.
70
00:05:06,674 --> 00:05:07,773
[Door Opens]
71
00:05:07,775 --> 00:05:08,840
[Door Closes]
72
00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:10,709
[Swords Clanging]
73
00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:12,344
SO CHECK THIS OUT,
ON MY WAY HOME,
74
00:05:12,346 --> 00:05:13,545
I HAPPENED TO PASS
WHERE THAT HOT CHICK
75
00:05:13,547 --> 00:05:14,980
TEACHES KUNG FU
OR WHATEVER.
76
00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:16,548
YOU JUST HAPPEN TO PASS
BY THAT PLACE EVERY NIGHT,
77
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:18,050
YOU CREEPY BASTARD.
78
00:05:18,052 --> 00:05:19,685
YEAH, BUT THIS TIME I HAPPENED
TO GLANCE IN THE WINDOW,
79
00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:21,486
AND ME AND HER
MADE EYE CONTACT.
80
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:23,155
I'M 90% SURE
SHE SMILED.
81
00:05:23,157 --> 00:05:25,757
LIKE A RYE,HALF SMILE.
82
00:05:25,759 --> 00:05:28,627
WOW, THAT'S
LIKE A FAIRY TALE.
83
00:05:28,629 --> 00:05:30,462
YOU GUYS
WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND.
84
00:05:30,464 --> 00:05:32,898
ANYWAY, LET'S GET STARTED
ON THIS PRESENTATION.
85
00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:34,032
WHAT PRESENTATION?
86
00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:36,001
THE BEOWULF PROJECT
FOR LIT CLASS.
87
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,803
I THOUGHT THAT WASN'T
DUE TILL NEXT WEEK.
88
00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,671
IT IS DUE IN TWELVE
AND A HALF HOURS,
89
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,673
AND WE'VE COMPLETED
APPROXIMATELY ZERO PERCENT,
90
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:43,608
SO THAT'S LITERALLY PUTTING
IT OFF TILL THE LAST MINUTE.
91
00:05:43,610 --> 00:05:45,877
I'M PRETTY SURE THAT YOU
AND OSWALD SAID THAT YOU
TWO WOULD WRITE IT,
92
00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:47,279
AND THEN I WOULD PRESENT
IT IN FRONT OF THE CLASS.
93
00:05:47,281 --> 00:05:48,280
WE DID NOT.
94
00:05:48,282 --> 00:05:49,614
I DISTINCTLY
REMEMBER YOU SAYING
95
00:05:49,616 --> 00:05:50,816
I DIDN'T HAVE
TO WRITE ANYTHING.
96
00:05:50,818 --> 00:05:51,817
I DID NOT.
97
00:05:51,819 --> 00:05:53,318
WE'RE ALL
GONNA WORK ON IT.
98
00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:55,687
WE HAVE TO PRESENT A CONCISE
ANALYSIS OF AN ANCIENT TEXT,
99
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,422
TO THE HARSHEST
GRADER AT THE SCHOOL
100
00:05:57,424 --> 00:05:59,391
AND YOU GUYS
ARE COMPLETELY-
101
00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:00,859
WHAT IS
THIS OSWALD?
102
00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:03,028
AGENT DANGER III, DIE
DANGEROUSLY, THE VIDEO GAME.
103
00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,730
I HAVE BEEN WAITING
FOREVER TO PLAY THIS GAME.
104
00:06:04,732 --> 00:06:06,765
IT'S GOT MULTI-PLAYER.
105
00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:09,000
HOW ABOUT THIS,
WE PLAY ONE ROUND,
106
00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:10,235
JUST TO CLEANSE
OUR PALATES,
107
00:06:10,237 --> 00:06:11,336
THEN WE START
WORKING ON THE PROJECT?
108
00:06:11,338 --> 00:06:13,138
NO, NO WAY.
109
00:06:13,140 --> 00:06:14,506
ARE YOU SHOOTING WITH
A GUN IN EACH HAND?
110
00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:16,007
YEAH.
111
00:06:16,009 --> 00:06:17,709
CHECK THIS OUT, I'M GONNA
SHOOT THIS GUY IN THE JUNK.
112
00:06:19,011 --> 00:06:20,545
Video game:
NUT SHOT.
113
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:22,647
(Laughing)
114
00:06:22,649 --> 00:06:23,982
SWEET.
115
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:27,786
OK, ONE ROUND, THEN
THAT'S IT, I'M SERIOUS.
116
00:06:32,492 --> 00:06:37,162
[Video game Gunfire
and Sword Clanging]
117
00:06:52,979 --> 00:06:54,613
QUIT LOOKING
AT MY SCREEN.
118
00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:56,047
I'M NOT.
119
00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:57,716
HOW ARE YOU FINDING ME
EVERY ROUND AND KILLING ME?
120
00:06:57,718 --> 00:06:59,885
THAT'S LIKE ASKING A
BUMBLE BEE HOW IT BUZZES.
121
00:06:59,887 --> 00:07:01,086
GOT YA,GOT YA, GOT YA.
122
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,721
I'M NOT PLAYING
WITH A SCREEN LOOKER.
123
00:07:02,723 --> 00:07:04,656
YOU'RE A SCREEN
LOOKER, DILL HOLE.
124
00:07:04,658 --> 00:07:05,991
IT'S 4:00 A.M.
125
00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:06,992
BETTER HIT THE SACK.
126
00:07:06,994 --> 00:07:07,959
ME TOO.
127
00:07:07,961 --> 00:07:09,194
WHAT ABOUT
THE PROJECT?
128
00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:10,962
WE NEED A TEN MINUTE
REPORT ON BEOWULF.
129
00:07:10,964 --> 00:07:12,097
BEOWULF?
130
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:14,032
MORE LIKE
GAY-O-WOLF.
131
00:07:14,034 --> 00:07:15,300
OH GOOD, NOW WE
HAVE AN OPENING.
132
00:07:15,302 --> 00:07:17,736
HEY, DON'T STRESS
ABOUT IT, LLOYD.
133
00:07:17,738 --> 00:07:18,970
WE'LL THROW SOMETHING
TOGETHER IN THE MORNING,
134
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:21,440
AND I'LL DRAW A
PICTURE FOR VISUAL AID.
135
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:23,809
YEAH, NO SWEAT.
136
00:07:23,811 --> 00:07:25,544
HAVE YOU GUYS
EVEN READ IT?
137
00:07:25,546 --> 00:07:27,779
PATRICK HAS MY COPY.
138
00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:30,248
IT WAS A LITTLE
DRY FOR MY TASTE.
139
00:07:31,651 --> 00:07:32,918
WE ARE SO SCREWED.
140
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:34,653
[Gunshot]
141
00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:38,423
[ ♪ ]
142
00:07:38,425 --> 00:07:39,925
[Knock at the Door]
143
00:07:39,927 --> 00:07:41,393
ENTER.
144
00:07:41,395 --> 00:07:45,096
♪
145
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:47,466
DARK MAGE DEREK,
SOVEREIGN OF GREMLOIRE,
146
00:07:47,468 --> 00:07:49,000
CHIEFTAIN OF
THE ORC HORDES,
147
00:07:49,002 --> 00:07:51,336
I HUMBLY BESEECH
YOUR AUDIENCE.
148
00:07:51,338 --> 00:07:54,005
GRANTED...
I SUPPOSE.
149
00:07:54,007 --> 00:07:56,975
♪
150
00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,677
DID YOU HAVE
SOMETHING TO SAY,
151
00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:01,379
OR ARE WE JUST ENJOYING
EACH OTHER'S COMPANY?
152
00:08:01,381 --> 00:08:03,982
IT'S THE GRAND
LARPING COUNCIL.
153
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:06,084
LOOK, IF I'M TO HAVE TIME
TO FAIL ALL THESE QUIZZES
154
00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:08,687
BEFORE LUNCH, I NEED
YOU TO GET TO THE POINT.
155
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:11,490
THE GRAND COUNCIL HAS
DECREED THERE WILL BE NO
156
00:08:11,492 --> 00:08:13,758
FINAL BATTLE AT THE END
OF THIS YEAR'S SEASON.
157
00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,093
WHAT?
158
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:17,262
THEY SAID THERE'S NOT
ENOUGH TEAMS REGISTERED.
159
00:08:17,264 --> 00:08:19,431
THEY SAID YOU'RE
SCARING EVERYONE OFF.
160
00:08:19,433 --> 00:08:22,300
♪
161
00:08:22,302 --> 00:08:25,470
OLIVER, CAN YOU EXPLAIN
TO ME HOW I WILL BE
162
00:08:25,472 --> 00:08:28,073
DECLARED CHAMPION IF
THERE IS NO TOURNAMENT?
163
00:08:28,075 --> 00:08:30,842
WELL YOU WON'T, THERE WILL
BE NO CHAMPIONS DECLARED,
164
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,844
AS THERE IS
NO FINAL BATTLE.
165
00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:35,380
WELL THAT IS THE SILLIEST
THING I'VE EVER HEARD.
166
00:08:35,382 --> 00:08:36,681
♪
167
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,717
AM I TO BE PUNISHED
FOR EXCELLING
168
00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:40,218
IN THE DEADLY
ART OF BATTLE?
169
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:41,887
YEAH.
170
00:08:41,889 --> 00:08:45,056
THE GRAND COUNCIL DOESN'T
WANT TO SEE ME WIN AGAIN.
171
00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:47,092
THEY WANT TO STOP ME
BEFORE I BREAK THE RECORD
172
00:08:47,094 --> 00:08:48,527
OF THE
WHITE WIZARD.
173
00:08:48,529 --> 00:08:50,195
IT'S ALL
GNOME POLITICS.
174
00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:52,864
SHUT UP,
STOP YOUR GROVELING.
175
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:57,002
WELL PLAYED GRAND
COUNCIL, WELL PLAYED.
176
00:08:57,004 --> 00:08:59,137
BUT YOU'LL FIND IT TAKES
MORE THAN POLITICKING
177
00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:02,173
TO DEFEAT THE
LORD DARK MAGE.
178
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:04,042
WHAT WE MUST DO IS
RECRUIT A FEW FOOLS
179
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:07,012
TO REGISTER UNDER
THE FORCES OF LIGHT.
180
00:09:07,014 --> 00:09:09,781
BUT WHERE DOES ONE
FIND SUCH DIMWITS?
181
00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:11,449
[School Bell Rings]
182
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,486
I TOLD YOU I HAD
IT COVERED BUDDY,
183
00:09:14,488 --> 00:09:16,888
JUST FIVE MINUTES.
184
00:09:18,824 --> 00:09:22,694
Derek:
WHENEVER YOU'RE READY, LADIES.
185
00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:25,463
YES. OH JESUS.
186
00:09:25,465 --> 00:09:33,305
UM, AS YOU CAN SEE,
HERE'S BEOWULF, AND HE WAS...
187
00:09:33,307 --> 00:09:36,575
WELL HE WAS THE GREATEST
WARRIOR IN THE LAND.
188
00:09:36,577 --> 00:09:40,845
AND UH, HE WASSIX FOOT NINE,
189
00:09:40,847 --> 00:09:46,017
AND HAD LONG-
SHORT BLACK HAIR.
190
00:09:46,019 --> 00:09:47,719
IT'S NOT TO
SCALE, BUT HE'S-
191
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:49,588
Lloyd:
HE SWAM HALF THE TIME,
192
00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:52,691
AND ALSO
CARRIED A WEAPON.
193
00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:55,727
THE SHIELD
FELL OFF.
194
00:09:55,729 --> 00:09:59,297
AND UH...
OH, AND HE KILLED GRENDEL.
195
00:10:02,969 --> 00:10:05,804
WE WILL NOWTAKE QUESTIONS.
196
00:10:05,806 --> 00:10:07,772
IS THIS A JOKE?
197
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:11,009
THIS IS IT,
WE GOOFED AROUND TOO LONG,
198
00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:12,677
AND NOW WE
GOTTA PAY THE PRICE.
199
00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:13,945
YOUR NEGATIVE
ATTITUDE IS REALLY
200
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,714
BRINGING ME DOWN
RIGHT NOW, LLOYD.
201
00:10:15,716 --> 00:10:18,283
LLOYD, ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS JUST
TAKE THE CLASS NEXT SEMESTER.
202
00:10:18,285 --> 00:10:19,551
NEXT SEMESTER?
203
00:10:19,553 --> 00:10:21,019
YOU GUYS REALIZE WE
LOSE OUR FINANCIAL AID
204
00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:22,921
IF OUR GRADES DROP
BELOW A 'C' AVERAGE.
205
00:10:22,923 --> 00:10:24,155
SO?
206
00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:25,423
I HAVE A 'C' IN ALL
MY OTHER CLASSES.
207
00:10:25,425 --> 00:10:26,891
YEAH,
WE'RE NOT IDIOTS.
208
00:10:26,893 --> 00:10:28,059
OH NO?
209
00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:29,461
NO. NOT IDIOTS,
ARE YOU SURE?
210
00:10:29,463 --> 00:10:31,129
IF YOU TAKE THE 'C'
FROM YOUR OTHER CLASSES,
211
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:32,631
AND YOU ADD THE 'F'
FROM THIS CLASS,
212
00:10:32,633 --> 00:10:34,532
THAT BRINGS YOU
TO A 'D' AVERAGE.
213
00:10:34,534 --> 00:10:36,267
UH OH.
214
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:39,838
I CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL PARTIALLY
RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS SITUATION.
215
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,339
YOU GUYS
ALWAYS DO THIS.
216
00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:43,341
YOU HAVE ONE SIMPLE TASK
YOU HAVE TO ACCOMPLISH,
217
00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:44,676
AND YOU GET DISTRACTED
BY SOME DUMB--
218
00:10:44,678 --> 00:10:45,677
[Sirens]
219
00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:47,078
OH MAN.
220
00:10:51,384 --> 00:10:53,885
HEY, FUCK YOU AND
THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON!
221
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:55,387
I KNOW YOU
DON'T MEAN THAT.
222
00:10:55,389 --> 00:10:57,422
I'M SO SORRY IF
I INCONVENIENCED
YOUR PRECIOUS DAY.
223
00:10:57,424 --> 00:10:58,757
I'M- I'M SORRY,
224
00:10:58,759 --> 00:11:00,592
MAYBE YOU HAVE ME
CONFUSED WITH SOMEBODY ELSE.
225
00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:01,860
I SAW THE AMBULANCE,
226
00:11:01,862 --> 00:11:04,295
AND JUST WANTED TO
SEE IF EVERYONE WAS OK.
227
00:11:04,297 --> 00:11:08,266
OH, UH,
SORRY ABOUT THAT.
228
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:09,801
THE NEIGHBORS ALWAYS COMPLAIN
WHEN THE AMBULANCE COMES.
229
00:11:09,803 --> 00:11:10,969
I JUST THOUGHT YOU
WERE ONE OF THEM.
230
00:11:10,971 --> 00:11:12,804
NO, I'M NOT.
231
00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:14,239
LLOYD.
232
00:11:14,241 --> 00:11:15,240
CASSANDRA.
233
00:11:15,242 --> 00:11:16,608
ANYWAYS,
I BETTER.
234
00:11:16,610 --> 00:11:18,610
HEY, DO YOU GET A LOT
OF AMBULANCE VISITS, OR?
235
00:11:18,612 --> 00:11:20,712
WELL, OUR TRAINING TARGETS
KEEP GETTING INJURED.
236
00:11:20,714 --> 00:11:22,047
I TEACH A WOMAN'S
SELF DEFENSE CLASS,
237
00:11:22,049 --> 00:11:24,816
SOMETIMES THEY GET
A LITTLE ENTHUSIASTIC.
238
00:11:24,818 --> 00:11:27,252
SO DO YOU NEED TO
KNOW KARATE FOR THAT, OR?
239
00:11:27,254 --> 00:11:29,387
NOT REALLY, HE'S MOSTLY
JUST THERE FOR ME TO
240
00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:31,056
DEMONSTRATE DIFFERENT
GRAPPLING MOVES ON.
241
00:11:31,058 --> 00:11:34,926
SO WHAT, HE JUST PUTS ON PADS
AND YOU WRESTLE FOR AN HOUR?
242
00:11:34,928 --> 00:11:36,394
NOTHING
TOO GLAMOROUS.
243
00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:37,762
I WAS JUST SHOWING
THE GIRLS HOW TO
244
00:11:37,764 --> 00:11:39,798
CHOKE OUT A GUY USING
ONLY YOUR INNER THIGHS.
245
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,700
UM, IT'S A REALLY WEIRD
COINCIDENCE REALLY BECAUSE
246
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:45,136
I'VE BEEN WANTING TO GET INTO
WOMEN'S SELF DEFENSE FOR LIKE,
247
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:50,008
AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER,
AND NOW, YOU HAVE AN OPENING.
248
00:11:50,010 --> 00:11:52,844
THERE'S NO PAY,
IT'S STRICTLY VOLUNTEER.
249
00:11:52,846 --> 00:11:53,945
IT'S NOT
ABOUT THE MONEY.
250
00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:57,449
OH, THAT'S AN
ATTRACTIVE QUALITY.
251
00:11:57,451 --> 00:11:59,250
IDENTIFY A PROBLEM,
MOVE IN WITH A SOLUTION.
252
00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:00,385
WELL, YOU KNOW ME.
253
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:01,586
WELL, YOU DON'T
LIKE KNOW ME, BUT.
254
00:12:01,588 --> 00:12:03,021
OK LLOYD, I'LL SEE
YOU THURSDAY AT 8:00.
255
00:12:03,023 --> 00:12:07,625
OK, HEY, THANKS,
SEE YOU ON THURSDAY.
256
00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:10,595
I MOVE IN WITH
A PROBLEM, NO, I-
257
00:12:10,597 --> 00:12:12,597
I MOVE IN
WITH A SOLUTION,
258
00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:14,966
I MOVE IN
WITH A SOLUTION.
259
00:12:14,968 --> 00:12:16,935
GUYS WE
HAVE A PROBLEM,
260
00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:18,169
IF WE DON'T
BRING OUR GRADES UP,
261
00:12:18,171 --> 00:12:19,671
WE WILL LOSE
OUR FINANCIAL AID.
262
00:12:19,673 --> 00:12:21,606
THE SOLUTION IS
THAT WE GO IN THERE
263
00:12:21,608 --> 00:12:24,142
AND ASK VERY
POLITELY FOR A REDO.
264
00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:25,944
WOW. I REALLY LIKE HOW
YOU JUST TOOK CHARGE,
265
00:12:25,946 --> 00:12:28,046
AND CLEARLY STATED
WHAT YOU WANTED TO DO.
266
00:12:29,215 --> 00:12:31,116
SO WE GO IN THERE
AND BE VERY POLITE,
267
00:12:31,118 --> 00:12:32,817
AND ASK NICELY
FOR A REDO.
268
00:12:32,819 --> 00:12:34,652
IF HE WANTS TO SHAVE A MONKEY
AND ROLL IT IN PINE NUTS FIRST,
269
00:12:34,654 --> 00:12:36,488
THEN WE DO IT. OK?
270
00:12:36,490 --> 00:12:38,022
ALRIGHT.
271
00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:40,058
OSWALD HERE CAN GIVE HIM A
HAND JOB, TO SWEETEN THE DEAL.
272
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:41,626
- NO, I WILL NOT.
- YOU DAMN WELL BETTER.
273
00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:44,963
IF IT COMES TO IT, WE WILL
ALL GIVE DEREK A HAND JOB.
274
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:46,397
FINE.
275
00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:48,266
ARE YOU ALL
THREE SHAFT MEN,
276
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,335
OR WILL ONE OF YOU
BE WORKING THE BALLS?
277
00:12:50,337 --> 00:12:51,970
(Lloyd Sighs)
278
00:12:55,808 --> 00:12:59,210
JUST SO WE'RE
CLEAR, GENTLEMEN,
279
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:02,814
THE ONLY REASON I'M SEEING
YOU IS BECAUSE STUDENT BYLAWS
280
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:05,049
DEMAND I MUST PROVIDE
ALL OF MY STUDENTS
281
00:13:05,051 --> 00:13:08,753
WITH A MINIMUM OF FIVEMINUTES OF OUTSIDE CLASS TIME.
282
00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:09,921
(Lloyd Clears His Throat)
283
00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:11,589
SIR, WE WERE HOPING
TO TALK TO YOU
284
00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:13,825
REGARDING
YESTERDAY'S PRESENTATION.
285
00:13:15,528 --> 00:13:18,263
THESE BYLAWS, HOWEVER,
STATE NOTHING ABOUT
286
00:13:18,265 --> 00:13:20,865
ACTUALLY
HAVING TO LISTEN.
287
00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:23,902
YOU NOW HAVE FOUR
POINT FIVE MINUTES.
288
00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:26,771
WHAT IS ALL
THIS STUFF?
289
00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,907
PUSSY
REPELLANT.
290
00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:32,677
WE NEED TO KNOW IF WE CAN HAVE
A REDO ON THE ASSIGNMENT.
291
00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:36,214
WE REALLY NEED TO
PASS THIS CLASS SIR.
292
00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:37,982
A REDO?
293
00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:39,717
THAT WOULD
ONLY BE FAIR.
294
00:13:39,719 --> 00:13:41,152
REALLY?
295
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,354
WELL YES, YOU HAD TWO
WEEKS TO DO AN ASSIGNMENT,
296
00:13:43,356 --> 00:13:46,424
AND YOU DID NO WORK.
297
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:49,928
AW, COME ON DUDE,
IT'S COMMUNITY COLLEGE!
298
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:51,229
WHAT DO YOU
MEAN BY THAT?
299
00:13:51,231 --> 00:13:52,530
IT MEANS THAT YOU'RE--
300
00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:56,067
I THINK WHAT PATRICK
IS TRYING TO SAY IS THAT
301
00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:58,136
WE KNOW WE MADE
A HUGE MISTAKE,
302
00:13:58,138 --> 00:14:00,071
BUT WE ARE VERY SORRY.
303
00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:01,306
I DON'T THINK THAT'S
WHAT HE MEANT LLOYD,
304
00:14:01,308 --> 00:14:04,042
- I THINK IT'S--
- IT'S NOT.
305
00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:06,044
THERE MUST
BE SOME WAY.
306
00:14:06,046 --> 00:14:09,347
I THINK THERE MIGHT
BE TWO WAYS ACTUALLY,
307
00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:11,950
SLIM AND NONE.
308
00:14:14,053 --> 00:14:16,187
WE WILL LITERALLY
DO WHATEVER IT TAKES.
309
00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:17,722
NOT WHATEVER IT TAKES,
310
00:14:17,724 --> 00:14:19,424
I MEAN, THERE'S A FEW THINGS
WE'RE PROBABLY NOT GONNA...
311
00:14:19,426 --> 00:14:21,092
OSWALD.
312
00:14:21,094 --> 00:14:22,594
WHATEVER
IT TAKES.
313
00:14:23,963 --> 00:14:26,297
THERE MIGHT
BE ONE WAY.
314
00:14:26,299 --> 00:14:27,966
NAME IT.
315
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:30,468
THE INFERNAL ACCORD.
316
00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:34,239
[ ♪ ]
317
00:14:34,241 --> 00:14:36,241
[Music Stops]
318
00:14:38,978 --> 00:14:41,212
[ ♪ ]
319
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:42,580
Derek:
NO ONE?
320
00:14:45,050 --> 00:14:49,020
A LITERARY DEVICE, ALSO KNOWN
AS MAKING A DEAL WITH THE DEVIL.
321
00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:50,588
A PARTY MAKES
A DEAL WITH SATAN,
322
00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:52,891
KNOWING THE ODDS ARE
STACKED AGAINST HIM,
323
00:14:52,893 --> 00:14:54,726
BUT HIS DESIRE
IS SO GREAT,
324
00:14:54,728 --> 00:14:57,262
HE'S WILLING TO RISK
HIS IMMORTAL SOUL.
325
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:59,364
AND THEN HE WINS
AGAINST ALL ODDS?
326
00:14:59,366 --> 00:15:02,667
NO, IN POST-VICTORIAN
GOTHIC LITERATURE,
327
00:15:02,669 --> 00:15:04,936
THE PROTAGONIST
ALWAYS FAILS,
328
00:15:04,938 --> 00:15:07,672
AND IS THUS DAMNED TO
THE ETERNAL FIRES OF HELL.
329
00:15:07,674 --> 00:15:11,109
YOU WANT US TO SELL
OUR SOULS TO THE DEVIL?
330
00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:13,111
I WANT YOU TO REGISTER
IN MY LARPING LEAGUE
331
00:15:13,113 --> 00:15:14,946
UNDER THE
FORCES OF LIGHT.
332
00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:18,283
DO THIS, I WILL
SUPPLY YOU DICK WEEDS
333
00:15:18,285 --> 00:15:21,653
WITH ENOUGH EXTRA CREDIT
TO MAINTAIN A PASSING GRADE.
334
00:15:21,655 --> 00:15:23,688
AND IF WE WIN THE WHOLE
THING, DO WE GET LIKE AN
335
00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:26,391
EXTRA, EXTRA CREDIT?
336
00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:29,394
YOU WOULD HAVE TO
DEFEAT ME TO WIN.
337
00:15:29,396 --> 00:15:33,298
YEAH, SO WHAT DO
WE GET WHEN WE WIN?
338
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:35,433
IF YOU MANAGE,
BY SOME MAGIC FEAT,
339
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:37,635
TO WIN,
I'LL GIVE YOU AN 'A+'.
340
00:15:37,637 --> 00:15:40,338
THAT GRADE, IN MY
CLASS, GENTLEMEN,
341
00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:44,042
IS AS ELUSIVE AS THE
MYTHICAL ONE THOUSAND SIDED DIE.
342
00:15:44,044 --> 00:15:45,677
- WE ACCEPT.
- WHAT?!
343
00:15:45,679 --> 00:15:47,045
LLOYD, WHAT
ARE YOU DOING?
344
00:15:47,047 --> 00:15:49,781
WHERE DO
WE SIGN UP?
345
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:51,382
THE DEN OF HE,
346
00:15:51,384 --> 00:15:54,385
FORMERLY KNOWN AS
THE WHITE WIZARD.
347
00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:57,722
♪
348
00:15:57,724 --> 00:16:00,458
AND IS THAT
A REAL PLACE?
349
00:16:03,595 --> 00:16:05,897
THE SENTRY BOX,
IN KENSINGTON,
350
00:16:05,899 --> 00:16:07,699
BY THE DISCOUNT
CARPET STORE.
351
00:16:09,501 --> 00:16:11,402
THE ENTRY
FEE IS $50.
352
00:16:11,404 --> 00:16:13,671
(Quietly)
$50?
353
00:16:13,673 --> 00:16:15,340
TIME'S UP
GENTLEMEN.
354
00:16:15,342 --> 00:16:17,809
NOW LEAVE ME TO
MY DARK STUDIES,
355
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:20,678
BEFORE I
CHANGE MY MIND.
356
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:24,315
SO DOES THIS MEAN THAT WE
STILL HAVE TO COME TO CLASS?
357
00:16:24,317 --> 00:16:25,950
ALRIGHT, OK.
358
00:16:29,922 --> 00:16:34,425
[ ♪ ]
359
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:40,565
♪
360
00:16:40,567 --> 00:16:43,267
Patrick:
I HOPE THIS ISN'T WHAT
WE'RE EXPECTED TO WEAR.
361
00:16:43,269 --> 00:16:45,403
IT'S JUST A PAINTING
FOR THE WALL.
362
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:47,171
♪
363
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:49,507
IT LOOKS
COMFORTABLE.
364
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:56,314
♪
365
00:16:56,316 --> 00:17:05,823
♪
366
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:09,260
♪
367
00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:11,129
- WOULD YOU DO THAT ORC?
- YES.
368
00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:12,530
WITH A CONDOM.
369
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:17,769
♪
370
00:17:17,771 --> 00:17:19,404
I'M SORRY SIR,
THAT'S NOT SOMETHING
371
00:17:19,406 --> 00:17:21,139
THAT WE USUALLY
KEEP IN STOCK,
372
00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:26,044
BUT UH, I CAN CERTAINLY SPECIAL
ORDER A LOIN CLOTH FOR YOU.
373
00:17:26,046 --> 00:17:29,881
YEAH, OH, I DEFINITELY
RECOMMEND ATHLETIC SUPPORT.
374
00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:32,550
OR YOU COULD JUST
TAPE IT TO YOUR LEG.
375
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,052
YEAH, OH YEAH.
376
00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:36,154
GOOD DAY SIR.
377
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:38,056
♪
378
00:17:38,058 --> 00:17:39,891
WE ARE WELL MET,
YOUNG ONE.
379
00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:42,093
HOW MAY I BE OF
SERVICE TO YOU?
380
00:17:42,095 --> 00:17:44,962
THE LARPING
TOURNAMENT THING,
381
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:47,265
CAN WE SIGN UP
FOR THAT HERE?
382
00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:50,735
OH, YOU WISH TO BRAVE
THE ANCIENT LANDS,
383
00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:53,171
BEYOND THE
GALEPASS SHORES,
384
00:17:53,173 --> 00:17:55,473
WHERE TRIBES
OF KRAKENTROLL
385
00:17:55,475 --> 00:17:59,010
SLAUGHTER UNWARY PILGRIMS
SUCH AS YOURSELVES.
386
00:17:59,012 --> 00:18:02,947
IF THAT'S WHERE THE TOURNAMENT
IS AT, THEN I GUESS SO.
387
00:18:02,949 --> 00:18:05,349
ACTUALLY IT'S USUALLY
OUT AT THE PARK
388
00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:08,319
BEHIND THE OLD ELEMENTARY
SCHOOL, BUT UH...
389
00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:10,054
Dagmar:
FOULEST TREACHERY!
390
00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:11,589
YES, NO, THE
BOOK OF RULES STATES
391
00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,391
THAT SUCH A
MANEUVER IS ALLOWED.
392
00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:15,960
YOU- YOU SIDE WITH JORGEN
JUST TO GAIN FLAVOUR.
393
00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:19,363
SORRY ABOUT THAT.
394
00:18:19,365 --> 00:18:21,632
TEMPERS CAN GET
QUITE HOT AROUND HERE.
395
00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:23,801
YEAH, WELL ACTUALLY
WE'RE NOT TOO FAMILIAR
396
00:18:23,803 --> 00:18:27,738
WITH THE SPORT
OF LARPING.
397
00:18:27,740 --> 00:18:31,175
OK, I'VE SEEN SOME PRETTY
SCARY STUFF IN HERE,
398
00:18:31,177 --> 00:18:33,678
BUT WILL SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE
ME A LITTLE CLARIFICATION
399
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:36,647
IN WHAT WE'RE GETTING
OURSELVES INTO.
400
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,717
LIVE ACTION ROLE
PLAYING, OR LARPING,
401
00:18:39,719 --> 00:18:42,019
IS NOT EASILY
SUMMARIZED,
402
00:18:42,021 --> 00:18:43,855
IT IS MANY THINGS
TO MANY PEOPLE.
403
00:18:43,857 --> 00:18:46,190
DON'T YOU GUYS JUST BANG
EACH OTHER WITH FAKE SWORDS?
404
00:18:46,192 --> 00:18:49,093
I SAW AN INTERNET VIDEO
WHERE A GUY WITH A WIZARD'S HAT
405
00:18:49,095 --> 00:18:51,028
THREW TIN FOIL
BALLS AT HIS CAT.
406
00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:53,097
Andy:
IT'S NOT JUSTABOUT SWORD PLAY,
407
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:56,467
OR MYSTERIES OF THEARCANE AND INCANTATIONS.
408
00:18:56,469 --> 00:19:00,004
LARPING IS MORE PURE,
IT'S ABOUT CASTING ASIDE
409
00:19:00,006 --> 00:19:02,340
THE SHACKLES
OF THE MUNDANE,
410
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:04,775
THROWING YOURSELFIN HARM'S WAY,
411
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:07,011
FOR THE SAKE OFSOMETHING MORE NOBLE.
412
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:08,546
YEAH, SO LIKE
CAPTURE THE FLAG,
413
00:19:08,548 --> 00:19:10,715
EXCEPT WITH
FAKE SWORDS.
414
00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:13,151
AND YOU COULD
SAY THAT SEX IS
415
00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:14,886
WRESTLING
WITHOUT CLOTHES ON.
416
00:19:14,888 --> 00:19:17,054
DUDE, HAVE YOU
EVEN HAD SEX?
417
00:19:17,056 --> 00:19:21,526
TRUST ME, I'VE WRESTLED
WITHOUT CLOTHES ON.
418
00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:25,129
MY ROMANTIC LIFE IS NOT THE
TOPIC OF DISCUSSION HERE.
419
00:19:25,131 --> 00:19:27,398
HE DIDN'T
MEAN ANY HARM.
420
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,467
I AM NOT NAÏVE
AS TO THE WAY
421
00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:33,070
THAT LARPING IS PERCEIVED
BY THE OUTSIDE WORLD.
422
00:19:33,072 --> 00:19:35,573
AND I WILL NOT ALLOW
YOU TO JOKE ABOUT
423
00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:38,342
SOMETHING THAT
WE HOLD SO DEARLY.
424
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:39,510
PLEASE LEAVE.
425
00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:41,846
NO, NO, YOU HAVE
TO LET US SIGN UP.
426
00:19:42,981 --> 00:19:46,551
I AM A
LEVEL 80 WIZARD!
427
00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:48,786
I DON'T HAVE
TO DO ANYTHING!
428
00:19:50,422 --> 00:19:51,722
GO.
429
00:19:53,592 --> 00:19:56,360
YOU TOO MOOR, GO.
430
00:19:57,930 --> 00:19:59,530
THANKS A LOT MAN.
431
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:01,098
YOU ALWAYS DO THIS, WHY DO YOU
ALWAYS DOUCHE OUT LIKE THIS?
432
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:04,268
OK, YOU KNOW WHAT,
LOOK, JUST CHILL,
433
00:20:04,270 --> 00:20:06,304
I'M GONNA SORT IT,
ALRIGHT?
434
00:20:07,639 --> 00:20:13,010
HEY, I'M SORRY,
I DIDN'T GET YOUR NAME.
435
00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:14,979
I DIDN'T SAY IT.
436
00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:18,182
BUT I AM ANDY,
SON OF CHESTER,
437
00:20:18,184 --> 00:20:22,053
KEEPER OF THIS
HUMBLE HOUSE OF GAMES.
438
00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:23,888
IT WAS ONCE KNOWN
AS THE WHITE WIZARD,
439
00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:28,426
BUT UH, THAT WAS
A LONG TIME AGO.
440
00:20:28,428 --> 00:20:32,396
UH, SO ARE YOU A GOOD WIZARD,
OR A BAD WIZARD?
441
00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:34,565
I SERVE
THE KING,
442
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:37,935
AND PROTECT THOSE THAT
CANNOT PROTECT THEMSELVES.
443
00:20:37,937 --> 00:20:39,971
OH GOOD, BECAUSE
ME AND MY FRIENDS
444
00:20:39,973 --> 00:20:42,840
SIGNED AN INFERNAL ACCORD
WITH AN EVIL WARLORD,
445
00:20:42,842 --> 00:20:49,680
WHO HAS BESEECHED INCREDIBLE
INJUSTICE UPON US.
446
00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:50,948
INJUSTICE?
447
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:52,383
YEAH, HORRIBLE.
448
00:20:52,385 --> 00:20:56,053
AND THE ONLY WAY IS FOR US
TO ENTER THIS TOURNAMENT.
449
00:20:56,055 --> 00:20:59,924
MAY I ASK THE IDENTITY
OF THIS DARK WARLORD?
450
00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:01,859
HIS NAME'S
IS DEREK.
451
00:21:01,861 --> 00:21:02,860
DEREK?
452
00:21:02,862 --> 00:21:04,629
HE TEACHES ONE
OF OUR CLASSES.
453
00:21:04,631 --> 00:21:07,131
I AM AWARE OF
DEREK THE UNHOLY,
454
00:21:07,133 --> 00:21:09,267
SERVANT OF
THE GREMLOIRE.
455
00:21:09,269 --> 00:21:10,568
REALLY,
YOU KNOW HIM?
456
00:21:10,570 --> 00:21:14,305
YES, AND I
CAN'T SIGN YOU UP.
457
00:21:14,307 --> 00:21:15,740
WHY NOT?
458
00:21:15,742 --> 00:21:17,308
FOR YOUR
OWN SAFETY.
459
00:21:17,310 --> 00:21:19,477
BUT WE
WANT TO JOIN.
460
00:21:19,479 --> 00:21:21,946
TRUST ME,
YOU'LL THANK ME LATER.
461
00:21:21,948 --> 00:21:23,314
[ ♪ ]
462
00:21:23,316 --> 00:21:25,716
WAIT, THIS IS LIKE
A PUBLIC THING, RIGHT?
463
00:21:25,718 --> 00:21:30,187
I SUPPOSE, IF YOU WANT
TO LEAN ON A TECHNICALITY.
464
00:21:30,189 --> 00:21:32,757
GET THE FORMS,
WE'RE NOT JOKING AROUND HERE.
465
00:21:32,759 --> 00:21:34,725
ARE YOU SURE I CAN'T
TALK YOU OUT OF THIS?
466
00:21:34,727 --> 00:21:35,726
NO.
467
00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:37,295
♪
468
00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:38,796
I MUST WARN YOU,
469
00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:40,631
♪
470
00:21:40,633 --> 00:21:44,268
YOUR ENTRANCE FEE
IS NON-REFUNDABLE.
471
00:21:44,270 --> 00:21:49,607
♪
472
00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:50,675
WELL?
473
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:55,680
OH, YOU MEAN NOW?
474
00:21:55,682 --> 00:21:56,814
YEAH, NOW
WOULD BE FINE.
475
00:21:56,816 --> 00:21:59,817
OH, SIGN THIS,
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
476
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:00,818
CAN YOU BELIEVE
THIS GUY?
477
00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:02,386
YEAH, I CAN.
478
00:22:02,388 --> 00:22:03,921
NEVER MIND,
OSWALD.
479
00:22:03,923 --> 00:22:07,525
YOU WILL NEED THESE,
INSIDE IS ALL THE INFORMATION
480
00:22:07,527 --> 00:22:12,296
YOU WILL NEED TO LEAD
YOURSELVES TO VICTORY, OR NOT.
481
00:22:12,298 --> 00:22:13,297
GREAT, THANK YOU.
482
00:22:13,299 --> 00:22:15,132
YOUR FIRST
MATCH IS SATURDAY,
483
00:22:15,134 --> 00:22:18,302
YOUR OPPONENTS
ARE THE DANES.
484
00:22:18,304 --> 00:22:19,303
WHAT?!
485
00:22:19,305 --> 00:22:20,905
PREPARE
THE CAMERA,
486
00:22:20,907 --> 00:22:23,574
I WOULD LIKE A PHOTO OF MY
EXTREME VICTORY FOR OUR BLOG.
487
00:22:23,576 --> 00:22:25,543
THEY ARE
MIGHTY WARRIORS,
488
00:22:25,545 --> 00:22:29,347
AND YOU MUST BE PREPARED
IF YOU PLAN TO DEFEAT THEM.
489
00:22:30,882 --> 00:22:32,717
AWESOME.
490
00:22:32,719 --> 00:22:34,919
GOOD LUCK,
YOUNG WARRIORS,
491
00:22:34,921 --> 00:22:38,022
YOU WILL NEED IT.
492
00:22:38,024 --> 00:22:40,591
HOW MUCH
FOR THIS?
493
00:22:40,593 --> 00:22:44,628
[ ♪ ]
494
00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:53,938
♪
495
00:22:53,940 --> 00:23:02,213
♪
496
00:23:02,215 --> 00:23:12,189
♪
497
00:23:12,191 --> 00:23:21,198
♪
498
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:28,506
♪
499
00:23:28,508 --> 00:23:31,876
I'M A MAN OF PEACE.
500
00:23:31,878 --> 00:23:40,918
♪
501
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:42,052
[Knock at the Door]
502
00:23:42,054 --> 00:23:43,687
COME IN.
503
00:23:43,689 --> 00:23:44,688
Lloyd:
OPEN THE DOOR!
504
00:23:44,690 --> 00:23:46,390
I SAID COME IN!
505
00:23:46,392 --> 00:23:48,526
MY HANDS ARE FULL,OPEN THE DOOR!
506
00:23:48,528 --> 00:23:49,527
WHAT DID HE SAY?
507
00:23:49,529 --> 00:23:50,628
I DON'T KNOW,
SOMETHING DUMB.
508
00:23:50,630 --> 00:23:51,896
[Door Closes]
509
00:23:51,898 --> 00:23:55,065
♪
510
00:23:55,067 --> 00:23:56,967
HEY... BUDDY.
511
00:23:56,969 --> 00:23:58,135
♪
512
00:23:58,137 --> 00:24:00,070
WE COULDN'T HEAR YOU
OVER THE TELEVISION!
513
00:24:00,072 --> 00:24:01,138
WHAT'S ALL
THAT JUNK?
514
00:24:01,140 --> 00:24:02,773
STUFF FOR OUR
WEAPONS AND ARMOR.
515
00:24:02,775 --> 00:24:04,008
WE HAVE TO
MAKE OUR OWN?
516
00:24:04,010 --> 00:24:05,209
THIS IS ALREADY
ANNOYING ME.
517
00:24:05,211 --> 00:24:06,610
WHY DO WE
NEED ARMOR?
518
00:24:06,612 --> 00:24:07,812
COME HERE,
I'LL SHOW YOU.
519
00:24:07,814 --> 00:24:08,879
♪
520
00:24:08,881 --> 00:24:11,882
OW! THAT WAS
REALLY UNNECESSARY.
521
00:24:11,884 --> 00:24:13,250
WAS IT?
522
00:24:13,252 --> 00:24:14,218
WHAT WERE THOSE WARRIORS
THAT JUST FOUGHT NAKED,
523
00:24:14,220 --> 00:24:15,252
I'LL JUST BE
ONE OF THOSE.
524
00:24:15,254 --> 00:24:17,388
I THINK YOU
HAVE LARPING
525
00:24:17,390 --> 00:24:18,889
CONFUSED WITH THE
DREAM YOU HAD LAST NIGHT.
526
00:24:18,891 --> 00:24:20,357
OH HO HO.
527
00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:21,625
TOUCHÉ.
528
00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:23,127
♪
529
00:24:23,129 --> 00:24:25,696
BEEN READING THESE BOOKS,
AND IT SAYS THE FIRST THING
530
00:24:25,698 --> 00:24:27,398
WE NEED TO DO IS TO COME
UP WITH OUR CHARACTERS.
531
00:24:27,400 --> 00:24:29,266
OH, I'LL BE AGENT DANGER,
THAT WAY I GET TO
532
00:24:29,268 --> 00:24:31,001
CARRY A GUN
IN EACH HAND.
533
00:24:31,003 --> 00:24:32,803
WE'RE GONNA BE FIGHTING
ORCS AND KRAKENTROLLS,
534
00:24:32,805 --> 00:24:34,271
NOT NINJA TERRORISTS.
535
00:24:34,273 --> 00:24:36,307
WHAT THE HELL IS A
KRAKENTROLL ANYWAYS?
536
00:24:36,309 --> 00:24:38,042
I DON'T KNOW,
IT'S LIKE A
537
00:24:38,044 --> 00:24:39,710
MONSTER OR SOMETHING,
I DON'T KNOW.
538
00:24:39,712 --> 00:24:41,879
NO, NO, ACCORDING TO THIS BOOK,
IT SAYS IT'S A TWISTED SPAWN
539
00:24:41,881 --> 00:24:44,949
OF AN UNHOLY UNION
BETWEEN TROLL AND DEMON.
540
00:24:44,951 --> 00:24:46,717
THIS JUST KEEPS
GETTING LAMER.
541
00:24:46,719 --> 00:24:50,087
I WAS GONNA TELL YOU GUYS,
I FOUND OUT THAT ORCS TYPICALLY
542
00:24:50,089 --> 00:24:52,423
EAT THEIR ENEMIES AFTER
THEY DEFEAT THEM IN BATTLE.
543
00:24:52,425 --> 00:24:53,591
SO?
544
00:24:53,593 --> 00:24:56,527
THAT'S SOME
TWISTED SHIT, MAN!
545
00:24:56,529 --> 00:24:58,963
THEY EAT
PEOPLE, LLOYD!
546
00:24:58,965 --> 00:25:00,231
SHHH.
547
00:25:00,233 --> 00:25:02,399
DUDE, WE'RE NOT GONNA
BE FIGHTING REAL ORCS,
548
00:25:02,401 --> 00:25:03,968
JUST VIRGINS
PAINTED GREEN.
549
00:25:03,970 --> 00:25:05,803
YOU KNOW IF WE SIT AROUND
MAKING CLEVER JOKES ALL NIGHT,
550
00:25:05,805 --> 00:25:07,304
THOSE VIRGINS ARE
GONNA KICK OUR BUTTS,
551
00:25:07,306 --> 00:25:08,772
BECAUSE WE
WON'T BE PREPARED.
552
00:25:08,774 --> 00:25:10,107
WHATEVER, I'LL JUST
DO MINE IN THE MORNING.
553
00:25:10,109 --> 00:25:12,343
YEAH, ME TOO, I WANNA
FINISH THIS CHAPTER.
554
00:25:12,345 --> 00:25:14,178
BUT WE AGREED
WE'D DO THIS TONIGHT.
555
00:25:14,180 --> 00:25:15,613
YOU'RE THE ONE WHO
WANTS US TO WIN SO BAD,
556
00:25:15,615 --> 00:25:17,648
SO IT ONLY SEEMS FAIR THAT
YOU MAKE ALL OUR ARMOR,
557
00:25:17,650 --> 00:25:19,049
AND ALL
OUR WEAPONS.
558
00:25:19,051 --> 00:25:20,084
♪
559
00:25:20,086 --> 00:25:22,419
OK, 'A',
THAT'S STUPID,
560
00:25:22,421 --> 00:25:24,221
'B', WHAT ABOUT
YOUR CHARACTERS?
561
00:25:24,223 --> 00:25:25,589
JUST PICK
SOMETHING.
562
00:25:25,591 --> 00:25:27,091
WE DON'T CARE.
563
00:25:27,093 --> 00:25:28,425
♪
564
00:25:28,427 --> 00:25:30,728
YOU KNOW WHAT, FINE.
565
00:25:30,730 --> 00:25:31,896
I WOULDN'T WANT
EITHER OF YOU
566
00:25:31,898 --> 00:25:33,797
TO PUT ANY EFFORT
INTO ANYTHING EVER!
567
00:25:33,799 --> 00:25:36,333
♪
568
00:25:36,335 --> 00:25:38,168
OH, HEY LLOYD,
569
00:25:38,170 --> 00:25:40,771
CAN YOU MAKE MY ARMOR
LIKE EXTRA THICK?
570
00:25:40,773 --> 00:25:41,772
UGH.
571
00:25:41,774 --> 00:25:42,840
THANKS.
572
00:25:45,176 --> 00:25:48,546
[ ♪ ]
573
00:25:48,548 --> 00:25:51,348
♪
574
00:25:51,350 --> 00:26:00,090
♪
575
00:26:00,092 --> 00:26:02,726
WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO BE?
576
00:26:02,728 --> 00:26:03,928
YOU'RE A
FAIRY WIZARD,
577
00:26:03,930 --> 00:26:06,297
YOU CAST SPELLS
WITH YOUR WAND.
578
00:26:06,299 --> 00:26:08,132
WHY DO I HAVE
TO BE THE FAIRY?
579
00:26:08,134 --> 00:26:10,134
I THOUGHT YOU DIDN'T CARE
WHAT YOUR COSTUME WAS.
580
00:26:10,136 --> 00:26:13,337
SO DISAPPOINTED
IN YOU RIGHT NOW.
581
00:26:13,339 --> 00:26:14,939
♪
582
00:26:14,941 --> 00:26:16,307
YOU ARE
A WARRIOR.
583
00:26:16,309 --> 00:26:17,675
I WANTED TO
BE A HOBBIT.
584
00:26:17,677 --> 00:26:19,543
♪
585
00:26:19,545 --> 00:26:21,312
BE A HOBBIT
WARRIOR.
586
00:26:21,314 --> 00:26:23,047
I CAN'T EVEN SEE
OUT OF THIS THING.
587
00:26:23,049 --> 00:26:24,048
NOT MY PROBLEM.
588
00:26:24,050 --> 00:26:25,816
♪
589
00:26:25,818 --> 00:26:30,421
GOOD MORNING, MY YOUNG
WARRIORS, AND FAIRY.
590
00:26:30,423 --> 00:26:33,924
HEY ANDY, WE HAVEN'T
SPOTTED THE DANES YET.
591
00:26:33,926 --> 00:26:38,295
REALLY, THEY'RE
USUALLY VERY PUNCTUAL.
592
00:26:38,297 --> 00:26:41,365
[ ♪ ]
593
00:26:41,367 --> 00:26:47,338
♪
594
00:26:47,340 --> 00:26:48,739
ORCS HAVE LANDED.
595
00:26:48,741 --> 00:26:52,042
♪
596
00:26:52,044 --> 00:26:53,143
COME ON,
LET'S GET THEM.
597
00:26:53,145 --> 00:26:54,678
PREPARE FOR
THE HORDE.
598
00:26:54,680 --> 00:27:01,485
♪
599
00:27:01,487 --> 00:27:09,693
♪
600
00:27:09,695 --> 00:27:12,429
WHAT IS THE
MEANING OF THIS?
601
00:27:12,431 --> 00:27:15,466
WE HAVE COME TO MAKE BATTLE
WITH THE SUB CREATURES,
602
00:27:15,468 --> 00:27:18,268
TO TEACH THEM THE
FUTILITY OF THEIR QUEST,
603
00:27:18,270 --> 00:27:19,737
AND GIVE THEM A
TASTE OF THE FUTURE,
604
00:27:19,739 --> 00:27:22,673
WITHOUT HAVING TO
BUILD A TIME MACHINE.
605
00:27:22,675 --> 00:27:24,642
THE DANES WERE
SCHEDULED FOR THIS MATCH,
606
00:27:24,644 --> 00:27:26,343
NOT YOUR
FOUL HORDE.
607
00:27:26,345 --> 00:27:28,479
YES, IT WAS THE
STRANGEST THING,
608
00:27:28,481 --> 00:27:30,347
I GAVE THEM
EXACT DIRECTIONS,
609
00:27:30,349 --> 00:27:31,882
BUT THEY CALLED
AN HOUR AGO,
610
00:27:31,884 --> 00:27:33,350
SAYING THAT THEY
WERE COMPLETELY LOST,
611
00:27:33,352 --> 00:27:34,752
AND GOING
TO BE LATE.
612
00:27:34,754 --> 00:27:39,256
CONTROL, WE GOT A
POTENTIAL SITUATION HERE.
613
00:27:39,258 --> 00:27:42,459
WE ARE GOING TO
COMMANDEER THIS STEEL CHARIOT
614
00:27:42,461 --> 00:27:46,230
TO TAKE US TO THE LAND
BEYOND THE GALEPASS SHORES.
615
00:27:46,232 --> 00:27:49,133
♪
616
00:27:49,135 --> 00:27:51,101
WE HAVE AGREED
TO STAND IN FOR THEM,
617
00:27:51,103 --> 00:27:53,270
SO THEY WILL NOT
BE DISQUALIFIED.
618
00:27:53,272 --> 00:27:55,005
WAIT, WE HAVE TO
FIGHT HIM ALREADY?
619
00:27:55,007 --> 00:27:58,275
I'M AFRAID SO,
IT IS WITHIN THE RULES.
620
00:27:58,277 --> 00:27:59,710
TAKE YOUR
POSITIONS.
621
00:28:01,713 --> 00:28:05,549
ON THIS SPOT, OVER
3,000 MAN YEARS AGO,
622
00:28:05,551 --> 00:28:08,752
TWO ARMIES
COLLIDED IN BATTLE.
623
00:28:08,754 --> 00:28:09,920
REALLY, RIGHT HERE?
624
00:28:09,922 --> 00:28:12,756
♪
625
00:28:12,758 --> 00:28:16,427
THE ORC RAIDERS,
LED BY THE DARK MAGE,
626
00:28:16,429 --> 00:28:19,596
DEREK OF GREMLOIRE,
ATTACKED THE OUTER
627
00:28:19,598 --> 00:28:22,466
SETTLEMENTS OF
THE HUMAN'S EMPIRE,
628
00:28:22,468 --> 00:28:26,770
A TRAIL OF BLOODY
CORPSES MARKED THEIR PATH.
629
00:28:26,772 --> 00:28:29,106
(Yells)
630
00:28:29,108 --> 00:28:34,778
THE EMPEROR FORESAW THE GREEN
SKIN INCURSION, AND DISPATCHED.
631
00:28:34,780 --> 00:28:37,648
WHO'S YOUR LEADER?
632
00:28:37,650 --> 00:28:41,085
FAIRY BARON PATRICK
VON HUGEN BALLS,
633
00:28:41,087 --> 00:28:42,720
SLAYER OF ORC SCUM.
634
00:28:42,722 --> 00:28:43,754
(Patrick Spits)
635
00:28:43,756 --> 00:28:46,490
THAT'S REALLY
NOT NECESSARY.
636
00:28:46,492 --> 00:28:49,193
THE EMPEROR'S
EDICT WAS SIMPLE,
637
00:28:49,195 --> 00:28:51,128
PROTECT THE
SETTLEMENT FROM
638
00:28:51,130 --> 00:28:54,465
THE FOUL STENCH
OF THE ORCISH HORDE.
639
00:28:54,467 --> 00:28:58,902
HUMANS, TO WIN,
YOU MUST PREVENT THE ORCS
640
00:28:58,904 --> 00:29:02,906
FROM REACHING THE SETTLEMENT,
AND PILLAGING THEIR WOMEN.
641
00:29:04,342 --> 00:29:06,677
OR SLAY THEM ALL.
642
00:29:06,679 --> 00:29:08,312
PREPARE YOURSELVES.
643
00:29:08,314 --> 00:29:10,314
♪
644
00:29:10,316 --> 00:29:16,920
HARK, THE DRUMS
OF WAR BEAT LOUDLY.
645
00:29:16,922 --> 00:29:20,224
[Pathetic Whistle Blow]
646
00:29:20,226 --> 00:29:21,859
LET THE LARP BEGIN.
647
00:29:23,094 --> 00:29:25,729
THE BARON THROWS
CAUTION TO THE WIND,
648
00:29:25,731 --> 00:29:27,798
AND CHARGES
THE ORC LINE.
649
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:32,136
♪
650
00:29:32,138 --> 00:29:33,837
OW, IT HIT ME
IN THE EYE.
651
00:29:33,839 --> 00:29:38,642
THE HOBBIT WARRIOR HAS BEEN
SLAIN BY THE CRUEL ORCISH ARROW.
652
00:29:38,644 --> 00:29:41,011
I'LL AVENGE
YOU OSWALD!
653
00:29:41,013 --> 00:29:44,948
I WILL USE YOUR SCALP TO
MAKE BOOTIES FOR MY BROOD.
654
00:29:44,950 --> 00:29:46,483
YOU WON'T.
655
00:29:46,485 --> 00:29:49,319
♪
656
00:29:49,321 --> 00:29:51,088
OW, OW, OW.
657
00:29:51,090 --> 00:29:52,356
Patrick:
ORC SCUM.
658
00:29:52,358 --> 00:29:53,590
GET AWAY
FROM ME YOU-
659
00:29:53,592 --> 00:29:55,225
AAAAH!
660
00:29:55,227 --> 00:29:56,693
[Patrick Screaming]
661
00:29:56,695 --> 00:30:00,430
I WILL CAST RESURRECTION
SO OSWALD MAY LIVE AGAIN.
662
00:30:00,432 --> 00:30:02,633
- THANK YOU LLOYD.
- YOU GOT IT.
663
00:30:02,635 --> 00:30:06,470
ERECTUS OBSECUISLABITRA, PRO HOMO.
664
00:30:06,472 --> 00:30:09,273
♪
665
00:30:09,275 --> 00:30:10,340
A SUCCESS.
666
00:30:10,342 --> 00:30:11,675
RISE YOUNG OSWALD.
667
00:30:11,677 --> 00:30:12,676
IS MY STILL
SUPPOSED TO HURT,
668
00:30:12,678 --> 00:30:14,678
BECAUSE IT DOES,
A LOT.
669
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:17,014
Derek:
I WILL COUNTER
THAT SPELL,
670
00:30:17,016 --> 00:30:20,484
NEXIUM, ORCANA,ZETHROMAT, FORMATTA.
671
00:30:20,486 --> 00:30:22,419
(Cheering)
672
00:30:22,421 --> 00:30:23,687
AND THE SPELL
HAS BEEN COUNTERED.
673
00:30:23,689 --> 00:30:24,688
WHAT?
674
00:30:24,690 --> 00:30:25,889
NOW PLEASE
BE SEATED.
675
00:30:25,891 --> 00:30:27,257
♪
676
00:30:27,259 --> 00:30:28,926
HA. GIVE UP.
677
00:30:28,928 --> 00:30:31,728
I SHALL CAST
TELEPORTATION ON MYSELF.
678
00:30:31,730 --> 00:30:34,631
MY DESTINATION
IS THE PARK BENCH.
679
00:30:34,633 --> 00:30:37,501
♪
680
00:30:37,503 --> 00:30:41,071
LOURDES, BOMBALUS,SCENIP, VALTRAXIUM.
681
00:30:42,340 --> 00:30:45,375
Andy:
AND THE SPELL ISA SUCCESS, UNLESS-
682
00:30:45,377 --> 00:30:46,376
QUICK, LLOYD,
COUNTER IT,
683
00:30:46,378 --> 00:30:47,878
OTHERWISE
THEY'LL WIN.
684
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:50,881
I- SHIT,
I- I CAN'T FIND IT.
685
00:30:50,883 --> 00:30:54,885
AND YOU NEVER WILL,
WITH THE BASIC SPELL BOOK.
686
00:30:54,887 --> 00:30:58,355
TELEPORTATION IS ONLY
IN THE LIMITED EDITION
687
00:30:58,357 --> 00:31:03,927
TWELFTH ANNIVERSARY OF
THE ADVANCED SPELL BOOK.
688
00:31:03,929 --> 00:31:05,929
THAT'S THE LAMEST
THING I'VE EVER HEARD.
689
00:31:05,931 --> 00:31:09,132
YOU ARE
CALLING ME LAME?!
690
00:31:09,134 --> 00:31:10,834
LOOK AT ME!
691
00:31:10,836 --> 00:31:14,004
FEAST YOUR EYES ON ME,
DRINK IT IN,
692
00:31:14,006 --> 00:31:16,306
LOOK AT MY
COOL HELMET!
693
00:31:16,308 --> 00:31:17,474
(Cheering)
694
00:31:17,476 --> 00:31:18,876
[ ♪ ]
695
00:31:18,878 --> 00:31:21,478
Andy:
VICTORY TO THE ORCS.
696
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:24,448
Oswald:
NO! WHY?!
697
00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:26,250
(Cheering)
698
00:31:26,252 --> 00:31:31,588
♪
699
00:31:31,590 --> 00:31:39,897
♪
700
00:31:39,899 --> 00:31:41,798
WELL FELLAS,
WHAT DID YOU THINK?
701
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,901
YOU WERE RIGHT, WE SHOULD
HAVE LISTENED TO YOU
702
00:31:43,903 --> 00:31:45,636
WHEN YOU WERE TRYING TO
CONVINCE US NOT TO JOIN.
703
00:31:45,638 --> 00:31:46,970
YEAH, WE SUCK.
704
00:31:46,972 --> 00:31:48,338
AND MY EYE
STILL HURTS.
705
00:31:48,340 --> 00:31:49,673
I WANT
MY $50 BACK.
706
00:31:49,675 --> 00:31:50,674
YOUR $50?
707
00:31:50,676 --> 00:31:52,509
NO, NO, I WANT
MY $50 BACK.
708
00:31:52,511 --> 00:31:54,711
NO, NO, NO,
$50 IS MY STANDARD FEE
709
00:31:54,713 --> 00:31:56,313
FOR WEARING
A FAIRY OUTFIT!
710
00:31:56,315 --> 00:31:58,348
HOLD ON
A SECOND.
711
00:31:58,350 --> 00:32:02,552
YOU KNOW, THE ELVEN KINGDOM
OF GORG WAS NOT BUILT IN A DAY.
712
00:32:02,554 --> 00:32:05,522
YOUR INSTINCTS
WERE IMPECCABLE.
713
00:32:05,524 --> 00:32:09,593
I HAVE NOT SEEN NEWCOMERS
WITH SO MUCH POTENTIAL
714
00:32:09,595 --> 00:32:11,929
SINCE BEFORETHE BLACK CRUSADES.
715
00:32:11,931 --> 00:32:14,798
YEAH, I THINK WE'RE
JUST GONNA CALL IT QUITS.
716
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:18,936
WELL, REMEMBER, THE ENTRANCE
FEE IS STILL NON-REFUNDABLE.
717
00:32:18,938 --> 00:32:20,404
I TRIED TO
WARN ALL OF YOU.
718
00:32:20,406 --> 00:32:21,405
WHATEVER.
719
00:32:21,407 --> 00:32:23,240
WE'LL FIGURE
SOMETHING ELSE OUT.
720
00:32:23,242 --> 00:32:24,975
THERE HAS TO
BE ANOTHER WAY.
721
00:32:24,977 --> 00:32:26,643
YOU KNOW, I THINK
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO
GIVE DEREK THAT HAND JOB.
722
00:32:26,645 --> 00:32:28,145
SHUT UP.
723
00:32:28,147 --> 00:32:30,480
YOU SHOULDN'T LIMIT YOURSELVES
TO THE PHYSICAL REALM.
724
00:32:30,482 --> 00:32:35,786
LOOK INSIDE, PERCHANCE A
HEART JOB IS THE SOLUTION.
725
00:32:36,888 --> 00:32:39,256
GROSS.
726
00:32:39,258 --> 00:32:40,757
[ ♪ ]
727
00:32:40,759 --> 00:32:43,593
DO YOU GENTLEMEN KNOW THE
STORY OF THE TWO FOOT MAGE?
728
00:32:43,595 --> 00:32:44,928
NO.
729
00:32:44,930 --> 00:32:47,030
HA HA, IT'S A
MARVELOUS STORY.
730
00:32:47,032 --> 00:32:50,567
ANYWAY, THE TWO FOOT MAGE
WAS MISSING TWO THINGS.
731
00:32:50,569 --> 00:32:52,769
LISTEN,
I DON'T CARE.
732
00:32:52,771 --> 00:32:55,238
YOU KNOW THE DETAILS OF
THE STORY AREN'T IMPORTANT,
733
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,774
THE MORAL IS
ABOUT HAVING FUN,
734
00:32:57,776 --> 00:32:59,443
WHICH HAS BEEN
A RARE COMMODITY
735
00:32:59,445 --> 00:33:02,012
SINCE DEREK AND
HIS BLACK CRUSADES.
736
00:33:02,014 --> 00:33:03,480
Lloyd:
LISTEN, MAYBE IT
WAS KIND OF FUN,
737
00:33:03,482 --> 00:33:07,050
BUT IF WE WIN WE GET
AN 'A' IN DEREK'S CLASS.
738
00:33:07,052 --> 00:33:11,088
WELL, I COULD COME OUT OF
RETIREMENT ONE LAST TIME,
739
00:33:11,090 --> 00:33:13,523
AND TRAIN YOU.
740
00:33:13,525 --> 00:33:16,259
WHY ARE
YOU RETIRED?
741
00:33:16,261 --> 00:33:17,527
IT'S A LONG STORY,
742
00:33:17,529 --> 00:33:20,764
I SWORE I'D NEVER
TAKE ON ANOTHER STUDENT.
743
00:33:20,766 --> 00:33:23,000
YEAH, BUT YOU'RE LIKE A
LEVEL 80 WIZARD, I MEAN,
744
00:33:23,002 --> 00:33:24,634
THAT'S PRETTY
GOOD, RIGHT?
745
00:33:24,636 --> 00:33:26,837
I CAN MELT FACES WITH
THE FLICK OF A FINGER,
746
00:33:26,839 --> 00:33:30,340
AND THE ROLE OF AN EIGHT SIDED
DIE, SO YEAH, YEAH PRETTY GOOD.
747
00:33:30,342 --> 00:33:31,708
WOW.
748
00:33:31,710 --> 00:33:33,610
♪
749
00:33:33,612 --> 00:33:35,712
DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU
CAN HELP US WIN THIS THING?
750
00:33:35,714 --> 00:33:38,281
WELL, IT WON'T BE EASY.
751
00:33:38,283 --> 00:33:40,684
BUT BY KROM,
WE'LL GIVE IT OUR BEST.
752
00:33:40,686 --> 00:33:43,487
I DEMAND A
COOLER COSTUME!
753
00:33:43,489 --> 00:33:45,055
THAT CAN BE DONE.
754
00:33:45,057 --> 00:33:46,757
AND IT WOULDN'T
BE A TERRIBLE IDEA
755
00:33:46,759 --> 00:33:49,926
TO THINK ABOUT MAYBE
ADDING ANOTHER TEAM MEMBER.
756
00:33:49,928 --> 00:33:53,764
MAYBE SOMEBODY
MORE UH, WARRIORLY.
757
00:33:53,766 --> 00:33:56,299
I KNOW JUST
THE BAD ASS.
758
00:33:56,301 --> 00:33:58,335
ALRIGHT, THROW IT LIKE
YOU MEAN IT, ROSIE.
759
00:34:01,773 --> 00:34:02,806
HIYA.
760
00:34:02,808 --> 00:34:04,541
OK, OK, UM, OK.
761
00:34:04,543 --> 00:34:07,010
JUST IMAGINE SOME DIRTY
PERVERT IS ABOUT TO
762
00:34:07,012 --> 00:34:09,279
SOIL YOUR FLOWER, OK,
HE'S GOT HIS FILTHY HANDS
763
00:34:09,281 --> 00:34:11,214
ALL OVER YOU, AND THE
ONLY WAY YOU CAN STOP HIM
764
00:34:11,216 --> 00:34:13,250
IS TO CRUSH
HIS WINDPIPE!
765
00:34:15,219 --> 00:34:16,553
YAH.
766
00:34:16,555 --> 00:34:18,255
DON'T WORRY,
I'M SURE WHEN IT HAPPENS,
767
00:34:18,257 --> 00:34:20,390
YOU WILL HAVE THE
EYE OF THE TIGER.
768
00:34:20,392 --> 00:34:21,425
ALRIGHT, GIRLS,
LET'S PARTNER UP
769
00:34:21,427 --> 00:34:24,127
AND PRACTICE
WHAT WE'VE LEARNED.
770
00:34:24,129 --> 00:34:26,129
YOU HAVE
A REAL GIFT.
771
00:34:26,131 --> 00:34:28,298
OH, FOR TEACHING,
YEAH I DON'T KNOW,
772
00:34:28,300 --> 00:34:30,300
I JUST DO IT TO PASS THE
TIME AND STAY IN SHAPE, I GUESS.
773
00:34:30,302 --> 00:34:31,301
REALLY?
774
00:34:31,303 --> 00:34:33,470
YOU'RE SUCH
A NATURAL.
775
00:34:33,472 --> 00:34:35,138
MY REAL PASSION IS
COMPETITIVE CAGE FIGHTING,
776
00:34:35,140 --> 00:34:37,007
BUT I'M BANNED
FROM ALL THE CIRCUITS
777
00:34:37,009 --> 00:34:38,475
DUE TO
UNNECESSARY CRUELTY.
778
00:34:38,477 --> 00:34:40,110
WHAT IF I
TOLD YOU I HAD A
779
00:34:40,112 --> 00:34:41,611
COMPETITIVE FIGHTING
OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU?
780
00:34:41,613 --> 00:34:43,613
FUCK YOU MAN, NO, I DON'T DO
THAT RUSSIAN BULLSHIT, OK,
781
00:34:43,615 --> 00:34:44,881
IT'S NOT SANCTIONED,
YOU GUYS HAVE FUCKING
782
00:34:44,883 --> 00:34:46,216
RIPPED ME OFF
WAY TOO MANY TIMES.
783
00:34:46,218 --> 00:34:48,685
OK, NO,
WHATEVER THAT IS,
784
00:34:48,687 --> 00:34:50,587
THIS IS NOT THAT,
THIS IS DIFFERENT.
785
00:34:50,589 --> 00:34:53,423
IT MAY SOUND WEIRD,
BUT I ACTUALLY NEED SOME HELP
786
00:34:53,425 --> 00:34:55,859
FIGHTING SOME
WIZARDS AND ELVES.
787
00:34:55,861 --> 00:34:58,462
OH, LOOK, HEY MAN,
788
00:34:58,464 --> 00:35:00,063
IN ANOTHER TIME I
USED TO HANG OUT IN
789
00:35:00,065 --> 00:35:01,898
LITTLE TOKYO,
WALKING THE STREET,
790
00:35:01,900 --> 00:35:03,100
LOOKING FOR EVERY
CHANCE I COULD TO BITE
791
00:35:03,102 --> 00:35:04,468
THE HEAD OFF
THE GOLDEN MONKEY.
792
00:35:04,470 --> 00:35:06,436
I WOULD HAVE DONE ANYTHING
FOR JUST ANOTHER TOKE,
793
00:35:06,438 --> 00:35:07,771
I WOULD HAVE
SOLD MY OWN COUSIN.
794
00:35:07,773 --> 00:35:09,473
I WAS SLEEPING
ON THE STREETS,
795
00:35:09,475 --> 00:35:13,276
USING MY OWN SHOES AS
A PILLOW, BUT I KICKED IT.
796
00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:14,444
YEAH.
797
00:35:14,446 --> 00:35:17,047
I FUCKING KICKED IT,
AND I FOUND THIS,
798
00:35:17,049 --> 00:35:18,215
AND YOU CAN TOO.
799
00:35:18,217 --> 00:35:20,684
YOU CAN, OK, BUT I
RUN A DRUG FREE DOJO,
800
00:35:20,686 --> 00:35:22,419
SO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE
UNTIL YOU GET YOUR SHIT CLEAN.
801
00:35:22,421 --> 00:35:27,524
NO, NO, I'M NOT
SMOKING THE SMACK.
802
00:35:27,526 --> 00:35:30,260
I'M ACTUALLY TALKING
ABOUT A SPORTING TYPE THING
803
00:35:30,262 --> 00:35:32,529
MY FRIENDS AND I GOT
INVOLVED IN CALLED LARPING,
804
00:35:32,531 --> 00:35:36,266
AND IT'S WHERE YOU DRESS UP AND
PRETEND TO BE WIZARDS AND HIT
805
00:35:36,268 --> 00:35:40,604
EACH OTHER WITH FOAM SWORDS,
AND IT'S KIND OF FUN, KIND OF.
806
00:35:40,606 --> 00:35:44,841
AND I NEED IT TO MAINTAIN
MY FINANCIAL AID AT SCHOOL.
807
00:35:44,843 --> 00:35:47,177
HMM. I GUESS MY
MOTHER WAS RIGHT
808
00:35:47,179 --> 00:35:49,179
WHEN SHE SAID I'D REGRET
NOT GOING TO COLLEGE.
809
00:35:49,181 --> 00:35:50,514
GOOD ONE.
810
00:35:50,516 --> 00:35:54,484
BUT I REALLY COULD USE
YOUR HELP, VOLUNTEERING,
811
00:35:54,486 --> 00:35:56,520
IN MUCH THE SAME WAY THAT
I SELFLESSLY VOLUNTEERED
812
00:35:56,522 --> 00:35:58,755
TO HELP YOU,
HERE AT THE DOJO.
813
00:35:58,757 --> 00:36:00,790
♪
814
00:36:00,792 --> 00:36:02,425
OK, I NEED TO
PRACTICE ON SOMEONE.
815
00:36:02,427 --> 00:36:03,593
WILL IT HELP
YOU SAY YES?
816
00:36:03,595 --> 00:36:05,529
PRACTICING
HELPS ME THINK.
817
00:36:05,531 --> 00:36:07,297
OK.
818
00:36:07,299 --> 00:36:08,298
WHAT DO I DO?
819
00:36:08,300 --> 00:36:09,666
PUNCH ME.
820
00:36:09,668 --> 00:36:12,302
HA HA, I'M ALL INTO EQUAL
RIGHTS AND EVERYTHING,
821
00:36:12,304 --> 00:36:14,237
BUT REMEMBER I'M
A MAN, AND THEREFORE
822
00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:16,306
20 TIMES BIOLOGICALLY
STRONGER THAN ANY WOMAN.
823
00:36:16,308 --> 00:36:17,774
JUST DO IT.
824
00:36:17,776 --> 00:36:20,844
OK, BUT ONLY BECAUSE
YOU'RE A PROFESSIONAL.
825
00:36:20,846 --> 00:36:22,579
HERE IT COMES.
826
00:36:23,648 --> 00:36:25,982
OW, THAT WAS
TOTALLY AWESOME.
827
00:36:25,984 --> 00:36:27,250
DO YOU HAVE
TO WEAR COSTUMES?
828
00:36:27,252 --> 00:36:29,019
YEAH, I CAN HELP YOU
MAKE ONE IF YOU WANT.
829
00:36:29,021 --> 00:36:30,554
YA!
830
00:36:30,556 --> 00:36:31,588
I'LL PICK
MY OWN COSTUME.
831
00:36:31,590 --> 00:36:32,756
OK, YEAH, COOL.
832
00:36:32,758 --> 00:36:35,258
♪
833
00:36:35,260 --> 00:36:36,693
Lloyd:
AND THEN, SHE THREWME TO THE GROUND
834
00:36:36,695 --> 00:36:38,228
WITH SOMECRAZY NINJA MOVE.
835
00:36:38,230 --> 00:36:39,262
♪
836
00:36:39,264 --> 00:36:40,764
IT WAS SO COOL.
837
00:36:40,766 --> 00:36:42,666
YOU REALIZE YOU ARE BRAGGING
YOU GOT BEAT UP BY A GIRL?
838
00:36:42,668 --> 00:36:45,735
YEAH, BUT HER BOOB BRUSHED
AGAINST ME WHILE I WAS PINNED.
839
00:36:45,737 --> 00:36:47,270
- REALLY?
- YES.
840
00:36:47,272 --> 00:36:49,472
WELL, IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN HER
KNEE, BUT I DON'T THINK SO.
841
00:36:49,474 --> 00:36:52,175
SO HOLD ON, YOU'RE SAYING THAT
IF THIS GIRL JOINS OUR TEAM,
842
00:36:52,177 --> 00:36:53,944
THAT WE ALL GET
THE SAME TREATMENT?
843
00:36:53,946 --> 00:36:56,813
NO, BUT OUR TEAM IS
GONNA BE SO BAD ASS.
844
00:36:56,815 --> 00:36:59,149
WAIT A MINUTE,
I'M ONTO YOU BUDDY.
845
00:36:59,151 --> 00:37:00,417
- WHAT?
- WHAT?
846
00:37:00,419 --> 00:37:01,551
THIS WHOLE LARPING THING
IS JUST ONE OF YOUR
847
00:37:01,553 --> 00:37:02,886
WEIRD PLANS TO
GET WITH THIS GIRL.
848
00:37:02,888 --> 00:37:04,154
NO, IT ISN'T.
849
00:37:04,156 --> 00:37:05,488
I READ YOUR BOOK YOU
MAGNIFICENT BASTARD.
850
00:37:05,490 --> 00:37:07,390
NO, WE'RE DOING
THIS TO GET THE 'C',
851
00:37:07,392 --> 00:37:10,026
SO WE CAN KEEP OUR FINANCIAL
AID, AND STAY IN SCHOOL.
852
00:37:10,028 --> 00:37:11,261
BESIDES, THE OTHER DAY
WAS KIND OF FUN, RIGHT?
853
00:37:11,263 --> 00:37:12,729
YEAH, IT WAS OK.
854
00:37:12,731 --> 00:37:14,798
OK, FINE, BUT I WANT YOU TO
UNDERSTAND SOMETHING ABOUT
855
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:17,500
THIS CASSANDRA CHICK, YOU SAY
SHE'S ALL INTO CAGE FIGHTING,
856
00:37:17,502 --> 00:37:18,768
AND SEIZING THE
DAY AND ALL THAT.
857
00:37:18,770 --> 00:37:19,769
RIGHT.
858
00:37:19,771 --> 00:37:21,304
WELL, MENTALLY
SHE'S A DUDE,
859
00:37:21,306 --> 00:37:22,839
SO YOU NEED TO STOP
PUSSYFOOTING AROUND,
860
00:37:22,841 --> 00:37:24,007
JUST BE
DIRECT WITH HER.
861
00:37:24,009 --> 00:37:25,542
I'M NOT JUST GONNA
ASK HER OUT, MAN,
862
00:37:25,544 --> 00:37:27,978
I NEED TO LAY
SOME GROUNDWORK.
863
00:37:27,980 --> 00:37:29,646
NO, DON'T ASK HER OUT,
864
00:37:29,648 --> 00:37:31,715
JUST START TALKING DIRTY
TO HER, SEE HOW SHE RESPONDS.
865
00:37:31,717 --> 00:37:33,383
WHAT?
866
00:37:33,385 --> 00:37:35,852
OK, HEY LOOK AT ME,
SAY HEY, CASSANDRA,
867
00:37:35,854 --> 00:37:37,821
I THINK YOUR HONEY POT
NEEDS A HOT BEEF INJECTION,
868
00:37:37,823 --> 00:37:38,922
SEE HOW SHE
REACTS TO THAT.
869
00:37:38,924 --> 00:37:41,591
MY GUESS
IS POSITIVELY.
870
00:37:41,593 --> 00:37:43,193
WOW.
871
00:37:43,195 --> 00:37:45,962
THAT'S SOME REALLY GOOD ADVICE,
HOW CAN I EVER THANK YOU?
872
00:37:45,964 --> 00:37:47,697
♪
873
00:37:47,699 --> 00:37:50,600
HEY, PATRICK, DO YOU THINK THAT
WOULD WORK WITH MY GIRLFRIEND.
874
00:37:50,602 --> 00:37:52,235
THAT DUDE OFF THE
INTERNET DOESN'T COUNT.
875
00:37:52,237 --> 00:37:55,939
♪
876
00:37:55,941 --> 00:37:57,507
Andy:
NOW THAT WE'RE ALL HERE,
877
00:37:57,509 --> 00:38:00,877
WILL EVERYONE PLEASE MAKE
A CIRCLE AROUND ME, JOIN HANDS.
878
00:38:00,879 --> 00:38:03,013
♪
879
00:38:03,015 --> 00:38:06,383
THE BOND THAT HOLDS
THIS CIRCLE TOGETHER
880
00:38:06,385 --> 00:38:09,386
IS THE SAME BOND
BETWIXT ALL THOSE
881
00:38:09,388 --> 00:38:11,688
WHO TAKE PART
IN THE LARP.
882
00:38:11,690 --> 00:38:16,359
NOW TELL ME, WHAT FORCE
QUICKENS THIS BAND OF WARRIORS.
883
00:38:16,361 --> 00:38:19,796
Lloyd:
A SORT OF
MODERATE COMMITMENT?
884
00:38:19,798 --> 00:38:21,531
PROTEIN?
885
00:38:21,533 --> 00:38:25,302
LLOYD, COMMITMENT,
THAT WAS AN ANSWER.
886
00:38:25,304 --> 00:38:30,507
AND YOURS WAS ALSO
AN ANSWER, SORT OF.
887
00:38:30,509 --> 00:38:32,442
BUT THERE
IS A DARK SIDE.
888
00:38:32,444 --> 00:38:35,478
KING WEINER,
AKA DEREK.
889
00:38:35,480 --> 00:38:40,884
HUH, FOOLISH YES,
BUT NOT THE DARKEST, NO.
890
00:38:40,886 --> 00:38:45,188
THAT MANTLE BELONGS
TO MY FORMER PROTÉGE,
891
00:38:45,190 --> 00:38:49,793
SO PROMISING,
SO POWERFUL.
892
00:38:49,795 --> 00:38:51,628
♪
893
00:38:51,630 --> 00:38:52,962
ANDY?
894
00:38:52,964 --> 00:38:55,565
IT'S STILL HARD
FOR ME TO TALK ABOUT.
895
00:38:55,567 --> 00:38:56,933
WHAT IS?
896
00:38:56,935 --> 00:38:57,967
NOTHING, UH.
897
00:38:57,969 --> 00:38:59,302
RELEASE THE CIRCLE.
898
00:39:01,172 --> 00:39:04,107
IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO
CHOOSE YOUR CHARACTERS.
899
00:39:07,178 --> 00:39:10,714
CAN I BE A ROBOT SENT BACK
IN TIME TO BATTLE THE ORCS?
900
00:39:10,716 --> 00:39:14,884
HUH, IT APPEARS THAT MY GUIDANCE
IS NEEDED, YOUNG OSWALD.
901
00:39:16,821 --> 00:39:20,223
GIVE ME A WORD TO
DESCRIBE YOURSELF.
902
00:39:20,225 --> 00:39:24,260
UM, DEADLY,
BUT HAPPY.
903
00:39:24,262 --> 00:39:26,963
DWARVES ARE THE
HAPPIEST FOLK I KNOW,
904
00:39:26,965 --> 00:39:29,466
UNTIL ROUSED
TO ANGER.
905
00:39:29,468 --> 00:39:35,805
I'LL BE BERSERKER BARBARIAN
DWARF WARRIOR, AROO!
906
00:39:35,807 --> 00:39:37,040
Andy:
EXCELLENT.
907
00:39:37,042 --> 00:39:39,442
BATTLE CRY NEEDS A LITTLE
BIT OF WORK, BUT--
908
00:39:39,444 --> 00:39:40,977
AROOO.
909
00:39:40,979 --> 00:39:43,780
OH NO, I DIDN'T MEAN NOW,
WORK ON IT LATER AT HOME.
910
00:39:43,782 --> 00:39:45,014
LATER.
911
00:39:45,016 --> 00:39:48,151
PATRICK, WHAT QUALITY
GUIDES YOUR FOOT?
912
00:39:48,153 --> 00:39:50,587
MY DEVILISHLY
HANDSOME FACE.
913
00:39:50,589 --> 00:39:53,690
PERHAPS YOUR WITS
MATCH YOUR LOOKS.
914
00:39:53,692 --> 00:39:56,926
DOTH A HALFLING ROGUE CONCEAL
HIMSELF IN YOUR HEART?
915
00:39:58,295 --> 00:39:59,729
WHAT?
916
00:39:59,731 --> 00:40:03,333
DO YOU THINK MAYBE YOU
COULD PLAY A HALFLING ROGUE?
917
00:40:03,335 --> 00:40:05,635
- THINK ABOUT IT LATER.
- YEAH.
918
00:40:05,637 --> 00:40:06,770
CASSANDRA.
919
00:40:06,772 --> 00:40:08,438
I'M FAST, AND I
CAN LAND A PUNCH.
920
00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:11,374
YES, AND IF YOU
LEARN TO USE A BOW,
921
00:40:11,376 --> 00:40:14,644
YOU WOULD BE THE SPITTING
IMAGE OF AN ELVISH RANGER.
922
00:40:14,646 --> 00:40:16,146
COOL.
923
00:40:16,148 --> 00:40:17,814
- LLOYD.
- HUH, YES.
924
00:40:17,816 --> 00:40:20,250
I NOTICED THE OTHER DAY
THAT YOUR INSTINCTS WERE TO
925
00:40:20,252 --> 00:40:22,819
CAST A SPELL TO
PROTECT YOUR FRIENDS,
926
00:40:22,821 --> 00:40:25,388
RATHER THAN TO LASH OUT
AT THE ENEMY IN ANGER.
927
00:40:25,390 --> 00:40:29,092
YEAH, I GUESS THOSE PALADIN
GUYS ARE PRETTY COOL.
928
00:40:29,094 --> 00:40:32,462
WARRIOR PRIESTS,
INDEED,
929
00:40:32,464 --> 00:40:34,798
THEY'RE VERY COOL.
930
00:40:36,934 --> 00:40:40,170
WELL, YOU HAVE A LONG
ROAD AHEAD OF YOU,
931
00:40:40,172 --> 00:40:42,405
IT HAS REALLY
JUST BEGUN.
932
00:40:42,407 --> 00:40:45,942
THERE IS MUCH WORK
STILL TO BE DONE HERE.
933
00:40:45,944 --> 00:40:48,645
WE HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING
TO ASSIST US IN OUR TRAINING.
934
00:40:48,647 --> 00:40:50,146
OSWALD.
935
00:40:50,148 --> 00:40:53,149
I DID A LITTLE RESEARCH,
AND I DISCOVERED THAT
936
00:40:53,151 --> 00:40:55,885
BUSINESS TYPE GROUPS KEEP
UP THEIR PRODUCTIVITY,
937
00:40:55,887 --> 00:40:59,189
BY MEASURING THEIR
OVERALL EFFICIENCY,
938
00:40:59,191 --> 00:41:01,791
USING CHARTS
AND OTHER GRAPHS.
939
00:41:01,793 --> 00:41:03,059
I CALL IT,
940
00:41:03,061 --> 00:41:05,895
Lloyd and Oswald:
THE WALL OF AWESOME.
941
00:41:05,897 --> 00:41:07,764
I HELPED.
942
00:41:07,766 --> 00:41:09,899
Lloyd:
AGENT DANGER
IS AT THE TOP,
943
00:41:09,901 --> 00:41:11,835
AND LAMENESS
INCREASES EXPONENTIALLY
944
00:41:11,837 --> 00:41:13,503
THE FURTHER
DOWN YOU GO.
945
00:41:13,505 --> 00:41:16,172
Patrick:
WHO'S THAT GUY
AT THE BOTTOM?
946
00:41:16,174 --> 00:41:18,675
THAT'S GEORGE
WASHINGTON CARVER.
947
00:41:18,677 --> 00:41:20,109
HE WAS MY IDEA.
948
00:41:20,111 --> 00:41:21,544
ISN'T THAT THE GUY THAT
INVENTED PEANUT BUTTER?
949
00:41:21,546 --> 00:41:23,780
WHY IS THE FATHER OF
PEANUT BUTTER THE MOST LAME?
950
00:41:23,782 --> 00:41:25,748
HEY, MY GRANDDAD
DIED OF A NUT ALLERGY.
951
00:41:25,750 --> 00:41:27,484
Patrick:
WE SHOULD PUT YOURGRANDDAD DOWN THERE.
952
00:41:27,486 --> 00:41:30,053
HEY, MY FERRET WAS HIT BY ONE
OF THOSE ELECTRIC HYBRID CARS,
953
00:41:30,055 --> 00:41:31,354
SO THAT SHOULD
BE ON THERE.
954
00:41:31,356 --> 00:41:33,590
I'M NOT SAYING THE WALL
OF AWESOME IS PERFECT,
955
00:41:33,592 --> 00:41:36,092
BUT IT'S SOMETHING.
956
00:41:36,094 --> 00:41:40,129
Andy:
THIS FEARLESS TRIBE OF
WARRIORS POSSESSES MANY GIFTS,
957
00:41:40,131 --> 00:41:42,899
ALL OF WHICH
YOU WILL CALL UPON,
958
00:41:42,901 --> 00:41:45,001
WHILE FACING THE
DANGERS AHEAD OF YOU.
959
00:41:45,003 --> 00:41:48,004
♪
960
00:41:48,006 --> 00:41:50,673
WITH THE CREATIONOF YOUR CHARACTERS,
961
00:41:50,675 --> 00:41:54,010
YOU'VE ALL DEDICATED
YOUR MINDS TO THE LARP.
962
00:41:54,012 --> 00:41:59,048
NOW IT IS TIME TO DEDICATE
YOUR BODIES, AND YOUR HEARTS.
963
00:41:59,050 --> 00:42:03,920
AS WE PROGRESS, YOU WILL
ALL FEEL YOUR BODIES CHANGE,
964
00:42:03,922 --> 00:42:06,723
YOUR HANDS WILL
MOVE MORE SURELY,
965
00:42:06,725 --> 00:42:09,425
YOUR EYES WILL
SEE MORE CLEARLY.
966
00:42:09,427 --> 00:42:12,695
HAIR WILL GROW WHERE
IT NEVER GREW BEFORE.
967
00:42:12,697 --> 00:42:17,100
THAT'S ACTUALLY JUST A NASTY
RUMOR, PATRICK, BELIEVE ME.
968
00:42:17,102 --> 00:42:20,403
SHALL WE CONTINUE?
969
00:42:20,405 --> 00:42:23,840
THERE ARE TWO
TYPES OF MAGIC,
970
00:42:23,842 --> 00:42:27,877
THE FIRST IS
PRECAST BATTLE MAGIC.
971
00:42:27,879 --> 00:42:32,882
THESE ARE YOUR LIGHTNING
BOLTS, AND ARCTIC BLASTS.
972
00:42:32,884 --> 00:42:34,684
NO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
973
00:42:34,686 --> 00:42:37,086
THOSE ARE LIVE
ROUNDS MY FRIEND.
974
00:42:37,088 --> 00:42:41,057
THEY ARE TO BE USED IN BATTLE,
AGAINST AN OPPONENT, LIKE THIS.
975
00:42:41,059 --> 00:42:42,892
♪
976
00:42:42,894 --> 00:42:45,194
PLEASE COVER
YOUR EARS.
977
00:42:45,196 --> 00:42:48,565
PLEASE,
FOR YOUR SAFETY.
978
00:42:48,567 --> 00:42:50,300
LIGHTNING BOLT.
979
00:42:53,804 --> 00:42:57,674
AS YOU CAN SEE,
QUITE DEADLY.
980
00:42:57,676 --> 00:43:01,778
THE SECOND TYPE OF
MAGIC IS SPELL CASTING.
981
00:43:01,780 --> 00:43:06,249
YOUR COMRADE HAS BEEN
STRUCK BY A POISON ARROW,
982
00:43:06,251 --> 00:43:09,652
HE WILL DIE WITHIN ONE ROUND,
UNLESS HE CAN HEAL HIMSELF.
983
00:43:09,654 --> 00:43:11,421
POISON, OK.
984
00:43:11,423 --> 00:43:14,524
OK, HERE, GENERAL
ANTIDOTE SPELL.
985
00:43:14,526 --> 00:43:16,292
BY ODIN'S BEARD,
I BANISH-
986
00:43:16,294 --> 00:43:18,294
♪
987
00:43:18,296 --> 00:43:20,597
HOW AM I SUPPOSED
TO RECITE THE SPELL?
988
00:43:20,599 --> 00:43:22,832
THIS IS YOUR
SPELL BOOK.
989
00:43:22,834 --> 00:43:27,270
♪
990
00:43:27,272 --> 00:43:30,073
YOUR BRAIN.
991
00:43:30,075 --> 00:43:34,344
IN HAND TO HAND COMBAT,
YOUR SKILLS ARE ASTOUNDING.
992
00:43:34,346 --> 00:43:35,945
I KNOW.
993
00:43:35,947 --> 00:43:40,083
BUT THE ELVES' FIRST WEAPON IS
THE BOW, SO PLEASE, FIRE AWAY.
994
00:43:40,085 --> 00:43:43,186
♪
995
00:43:43,188 --> 00:43:45,054
BY ODIN'S BEARD,
THAT WAS CLOSE.
996
00:43:45,056 --> 00:43:46,089
SORRY.
997
00:43:46,091 --> 00:43:48,257
TRY AGAIN,
BUT THIS TIME,
998
00:43:48,259 --> 00:43:50,860
FOCUS ON THE TARGET,
NOT THE WEAPON.
999
00:43:50,862 --> 00:43:53,763
I HAVE THE
HIGHEST FAITH IN YOU.
1000
00:43:53,765 --> 00:43:55,465
OH WAIT,
HOLD ON A SECOND.
1001
00:43:55,467 --> 00:43:58,434
♪
1002
00:43:58,436 --> 00:43:59,669
FIRE AWAY.
1003
00:43:59,671 --> 00:44:02,639
♪
1004
00:44:02,641 --> 00:44:06,209
YOU TRULY HAVE A MIGHTY
WARRIOR WITHIN YOUR SOUL.
1005
00:44:06,211 --> 00:44:09,312
I THINK YOU'RE PREPARED
TO GO TO THE NEXT BATTLE.
1006
00:44:09,314 --> 00:44:11,781
[ ♪ ]
1007
00:44:11,783 --> 00:44:16,853
♪
1008
00:44:16,855 --> 00:44:20,223
CHARGE!
1009
00:44:20,225 --> 00:44:22,558
WHAT, ARE YOU AFRAID
TO FIGHT ME WITH HONOR?
1010
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:25,862
THE ARROW TAKES
TEN HIT POINTS.
1011
00:44:25,864 --> 00:44:28,798
HOW WEAK,
I HAVE OVER 30 HPS.
1012
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:31,000
♪
1013
00:44:31,002 --> 00:44:32,001
OK.
1014
00:44:32,003 --> 00:44:34,671
AH, OH.
1015
00:44:34,673 --> 00:44:35,672
♪
1016
00:44:35,674 --> 00:44:38,508
GET BACK,
BACK TO THE ABYSS.
1017
00:44:38,510 --> 00:44:40,343
NO, WE ARE
FROM COPENHAGEN.
1018
00:44:40,345 --> 00:44:41,344
WHAT?
1019
00:44:41,346 --> 00:44:42,645
YES, IT WAS
RANKED THE MOST
1020
00:44:42,647 --> 00:44:44,681
LIVABLE CITY BY
MONOCLE MAGAZINE.
1021
00:44:44,683 --> 00:44:46,249
Patrick:
AAH!
1022
00:44:46,251 --> 00:44:47,750
A CRITICAL HIT.
1023
00:44:47,752 --> 00:44:50,753
THE ROGUE HAS
SLAIN HIS FOE.
1024
00:44:50,755 --> 00:44:52,922
♪
1025
00:44:52,924 --> 00:44:53,923
- OW.
- SORRY.
1026
00:44:53,925 --> 00:44:55,758
BUT I HAVE
MUCH LEFT TO DO.
1027
00:44:55,760 --> 00:44:57,093
WHOA.
1028
00:44:57,095 --> 00:45:03,666
♪
1029
00:45:03,668 --> 00:45:07,970
Jorgen:
YOU FIGHT NOT AS MEN DO,
MORE AS WOMEN AND SWEDES.
1030
00:45:07,972 --> 00:45:13,009
♪
1031
00:45:13,011 --> 00:45:14,977
GUYS, I NEED SOME
HELP OVER HERE.
1032
00:45:14,979 --> 00:45:16,379
CAN'T LLOYD,
WE'RE LARPING.
1033
00:45:16,381 --> 00:45:21,884
♪
1034
00:45:21,886 --> 00:45:23,853
WAIT, DID YOU SAY YOU
HAD A LARPING BLOG?
1035
00:45:23,855 --> 00:45:30,059
YEAH, WE USE IT TO RECORD
OUR VICTORIES AND OUR WOUNDS,
1036
00:45:30,061 --> 00:45:32,628
AND TO SHOW OUR
BADGES OF HONOR.
1037
00:45:32,630 --> 00:45:33,930
WOULD YOU
LIKE THE URL?
1038
00:45:33,932 --> 00:45:35,264
UH SURE, DO YOU
HAVE IT ON YOU?
1039
00:45:35,266 --> 00:45:36,666
ON ME, UH?
1040
00:45:36,668 --> 00:45:39,135
ARCTIC BLAST, ARCTIC BLAST,
I ARCTIC BLASTED YOU.
1041
00:45:39,137 --> 00:45:41,771
YOU DO NOT
CARE ABOUT MY URL.
1042
00:45:41,773 --> 00:45:44,707
SO DO YOU WANT TO
DO A COUNTER SPELL?
1043
00:45:44,709 --> 00:45:48,978
MAGIC IS FOR THE WEAK,
I WILL FIGHT WITH HONOR.
1044
00:45:48,980 --> 00:45:51,380
JORGEN THUNDER THIGHS,
1045
00:45:51,382 --> 00:45:57,253
YOU WILL REMAIN FROZEN
FOR THE NEXT 15 SECONDS.
1046
00:45:57,255 --> 00:46:00,456
♪
1047
00:46:00,458 --> 00:46:04,393
DAGMAR, YOU SHOULD
DOCUMENT MY BEATING.
1048
00:46:04,395 --> 00:46:05,695
♪
1049
00:46:05,697 --> 00:46:09,732
MAYBE IT IS YOU WHO
SHOULD RECORD MY DEFEAT.
1050
00:46:09,734 --> 00:46:14,837
♪
1051
00:46:14,839 --> 00:46:16,339
SORRY.
1052
00:46:16,341 --> 00:46:18,841
♪
1053
00:46:18,843 --> 00:46:20,710
VICTORY.
1054
00:46:20,712 --> 00:46:24,647
♪
1055
00:46:24,649 --> 00:46:26,816
WE WON,
I THINK WE WON.
1056
00:46:26,818 --> 00:46:28,684
YOU CAN
UNFREEZE NOW.
1057
00:46:28,686 --> 00:46:30,753
[Glass Smashing]
1058
00:46:30,755 --> 00:46:34,791
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT
THEY DEFEATED THE DANES
1059
00:46:34,793 --> 00:46:38,027
AND THE WHITE WIZARD
IS TRAINING THEM?!
1060
00:46:38,029 --> 00:46:40,630
AND DON'T FORGET THE GIRL,
SHE LOOKS REALLY DANGEROUS.
1061
00:46:40,632 --> 00:46:43,900
I'M NOT FORGETTING
THE GIRL, OLIVER.
1062
00:46:43,902 --> 00:46:45,735
THEY ACTUALLY HAVE
A CHANCE AT WINNING,
1063
00:46:45,737 --> 00:46:48,004
AND FOILING MY
PLANS OF BREAKING
1064
00:46:48,006 --> 00:46:51,174
THE WHITE WIZARD'S
WONDERFUL WINNING RECORD.
1065
00:46:51,176 --> 00:46:54,143
SO WHAT ARE
YOU GOING TO DO?
1066
00:46:54,145 --> 00:46:56,179
I'M GOING TO TAKE
A PLAY FROM YOUR BOOK,
1067
00:46:56,181 --> 00:46:58,181
AND TRY TO
PUSSY MY WAY OUT.
1068
00:47:01,385 --> 00:47:03,252
OK.
1069
00:47:03,254 --> 00:47:07,356
AND HE WAS LIKE, I'LL SELL YOUR
SOUL TO THE TWISTING NETHER.
1070
00:47:07,358 --> 00:47:12,562
AND I WAS LIKE YOUR
MOM'S A TWISTING NETHER.
1071
00:47:12,564 --> 00:47:13,963
OOPS.
1072
00:47:13,965 --> 00:47:16,132
(Laughing)
1073
00:47:16,134 --> 00:47:17,733
Oswald:
I'M OK.
1074
00:47:17,735 --> 00:47:19,468
SO YOU REALLY KICKED
ASS OUT THERE TODAY.
1075
00:47:19,470 --> 00:47:22,505
YEAH, WELL I'M GLAD YOU
INVITED ME TO JOIN YOUR ARMY.
1076
00:47:22,507 --> 00:47:24,006
YOU GUYS ARE
KIND OF FUN.
1077
00:47:24,008 --> 00:47:26,209
THEY'RE OK,
BUT I THINK THE ENJOYMENT
1078
00:47:26,211 --> 00:47:29,946
YOU'RE FEELING IS
MORE LLOYD CENTERED.
1079
00:47:29,948 --> 00:47:31,547
MAYBE.
1080
00:47:31,549 --> 00:47:35,384
ALRIGHT, I'M TAKING OFF,
KEEP IT CLEAN GENTLEMEN.
1081
00:47:35,386 --> 00:47:38,087
MAYBE I SHOULD
WALK YOU HOME.
1082
00:47:38,089 --> 00:47:39,255
I CAN TAKE
CARE OF MYSELF.
1083
00:47:39,257 --> 00:47:40,356
- YEAH.
- SEE YOU LATER.
1084
00:47:40,358 --> 00:47:41,924
OK. SEE YA.
1085
00:47:41,926 --> 00:47:43,259
[Door Closes]
1086
00:47:43,261 --> 00:47:46,529
♪
1087
00:47:46,531 --> 00:47:48,531
YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD
HER TO SLOB YOUR KNOB.
1088
00:47:48,533 --> 00:47:51,133
Oswald:
WHY DO YOU GUYS KEEP
DOING THIS TO ME?
1089
00:47:51,135 --> 00:47:54,170
Patrick:
SHHH.
1090
00:47:54,172 --> 00:47:56,839
WELL...
I KIND OF LIKE IT.
1091
00:47:56,841 --> 00:47:59,375
[School Bell Rings]
1092
00:48:05,015 --> 00:48:07,850
OH, HELLO LLOYD,
HOW ARE YOU?
1093
00:48:07,852 --> 00:48:09,819
I'M OK,
JUST HEADING TO CLASS.
1094
00:48:09,821 --> 00:48:13,322
GREAT, GREAT, LISTEN, I'VE
BEEN WORRIED ABOUT YOU BOYS
1095
00:48:13,324 --> 00:48:15,892
GETTING DISTRACTED
FROM YOUR SCHOOL WORK.
1096
00:48:15,894 --> 00:48:18,261
UH, NO, UM,
I THINK WE'RE FINE.
1097
00:48:18,263 --> 00:48:20,630
YES, BUT I WOULD HATE FOR
ANY OF THIS LARPING NONSENSE
1098
00:48:20,632 --> 00:48:22,265
TO INTERFERE WITH
YOUR ACADEMICS,
1099
00:48:22,267 --> 00:48:24,767
IT IS GRADES FIRST,
YOU KNOW.
1100
00:48:24,769 --> 00:48:28,004
NAH, DON'T WORRY, IT'S ACTUALLY
GOING BETTER THAN EXPECTED.
1101
00:48:28,006 --> 00:48:30,673
OH, FANTASTIC.
1102
00:48:30,675 --> 00:48:32,508
HOW ABOUT THIS,
YOU WITHDRAW
1103
00:48:32,510 --> 00:48:34,377
FROM THE DEMONS
AND DWARVES LEAGUE,
1104
00:48:34,379 --> 00:48:36,512
AND I WILL GIVE YOU
AND YOUR FRIENDS A 'C',
1105
00:48:36,514 --> 00:48:38,214
NO QUESTIONS ASKED.
1106
00:48:38,216 --> 00:48:39,649
WE CAN'T
WITHDRAW.
1107
00:48:39,651 --> 00:48:42,051
I'M OFFERING
TO PASS YOU.
1108
00:48:42,053 --> 00:48:43,252
JUST SAY YES.
1109
00:48:43,254 --> 00:48:45,254
WELL, SEE THERE'S
THIS GIRL,
1110
00:48:45,256 --> 00:48:46,589
AND I THINK SHE
MIGHT LIKE ME,
1111
00:48:46,591 --> 00:48:48,424
BUT I KIND OF THINK WE
NEED MORE FACE TIME, SO.
1112
00:48:48,426 --> 00:48:50,893
JUST SAY YES, LLOYD.
1113
00:48:50,895 --> 00:48:52,795
I'M SORRY
I CAN'T DO THAT.
1114
00:48:52,797 --> 00:48:56,132
YOU THINK YOU'RE SO BIG,
DON'T YOU LLOYD?
1115
00:48:56,134 --> 00:48:57,934
JUST REGULAR SIZE.
1116
00:48:57,936 --> 00:48:59,769
WITH YOUR
PERFECT HAIR.
1117
00:48:59,771 --> 00:49:02,939
IT'S JUST HAIR.
1118
00:49:02,941 --> 00:49:05,007
DO YOU WANT
ME TO FAIL YOU?
1119
00:49:05,009 --> 00:49:06,509
WAIT A MINUTE, WE HAVE
AN INFERNAL ACCORD,
1120
00:49:06,511 --> 00:49:08,210
YOU HAVE TO GIVE
US EXTRA CREDIT.
1121
00:49:08,212 --> 00:49:10,446
I WOULD NEVER CONSIDER
BREAKING THE INFERNAL ACCORD,
1122
00:49:10,448 --> 00:49:12,748
BUT I CAN GRADE YOUR
ASSIGNMENTS EXTRA CRITICALLY,
1123
00:49:12,750 --> 00:49:15,051
MEANING YOU WILL
FAIL THIS CLASS.
1124
00:49:15,053 --> 00:49:16,552
WHAT'S YOUR
PROBLEM, MAN?
1125
00:49:16,554 --> 00:49:18,521
YOU WANTED US TO SIGN UP,
NOW YOU WANT US OUT, WHAT?
1126
00:49:18,523 --> 00:49:20,923
MY PROBLEM IS THAT YOU BROKE
THE SPIRIT OF THE CONTRACT
1127
00:49:20,925 --> 00:49:23,059
BY SEEKING HELP
FROM THE WHITE WIZARD.
1128
00:49:23,061 --> 00:49:25,795
DROP OUT NOW, OR
SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.
1129
00:49:25,797 --> 00:49:27,229
SCREW YOU.
1130
00:49:27,231 --> 00:49:29,899
WE'RE GONNA WIN THE
TOURNAMENT, AND GET THE 'A+'.
1131
00:49:29,901 --> 00:49:31,634
SO BE IT.
1132
00:49:31,636 --> 00:49:34,170
YOU HAVE FEALED
YOUR OWN SATE.
1133
00:49:34,172 --> 00:49:36,105
YOU MEAN,
SEALED YOUR OWN FATE?
1134
00:49:36,107 --> 00:49:37,340
FUCK!
1135
00:49:38,675 --> 00:49:41,777
[ ♪ ]
1136
00:49:41,779 --> 00:49:47,750
♪
1137
00:49:47,752 --> 00:49:57,793
♪
1138
00:49:57,795 --> 00:50:07,803
♪
1139
00:50:07,805 --> 00:50:17,813
♪
1140
00:50:17,815 --> 00:50:27,790
♪
1141
00:50:27,792 --> 00:50:37,800
♪
1142
00:50:37,802 --> 00:50:47,843
♪
1143
00:50:47,845 --> 00:50:57,853
♪
1144
00:50:57,855 --> 00:51:07,863
♪
1145
00:51:07,865 --> 00:51:17,840
♪
1146
00:51:17,842 --> 00:51:27,883
♪
1147
00:51:27,885 --> 00:51:32,688
♪
1148
00:51:32,690 --> 00:51:37,426
SCRATCH YOUR NAME FROM
THE DEAD MAN'S SCROLL,
1149
00:51:37,428 --> 00:51:39,862
COMMAND TO EARTH
YOUR ETERNAL SOUL.
1150
00:51:39,864 --> 00:51:47,636
♪
1151
00:51:47,638 --> 00:51:50,005
OK REMEMBER ATTACKERS,
YOU WANT TO HURT THIS PERSON.
1152
00:51:50,007 --> 00:51:51,240
GO.
1153
00:51:53,343 --> 00:51:56,378
OK, CLASS, WE'RE GONNA
TRY SOMETHING NEW.
1154
00:51:56,380 --> 00:51:58,547
I WANT YOU EACH TO
CHOOSE A CHARACTER,
1155
00:51:58,549 --> 00:52:00,082
SOMEBODY WHOSEABILITIES YOU ADMIRE,
1156
00:52:00,084 --> 00:52:01,717
BE IT PHYSICALOR EMOTIONAL,
1157
00:52:01,719 --> 00:52:03,719
AND I WANT YOU TO
CHANNEL THEIR STRENGTH.
1158
00:52:03,721 --> 00:52:06,856
CAN I BE BETH, DOG THE
BOUNTY HUNTER'S WIFE?
1159
00:52:06,858 --> 00:52:08,157
IF IT HELPS.
1160
00:52:13,430 --> 00:52:16,966
SAY ALOHA TO JESUS.
1161
00:52:16,968 --> 00:52:17,967
HA!
1162
00:52:17,969 --> 00:52:18,968
HA!
1163
00:52:18,970 --> 00:52:20,803
- HA!
- OH!
1164
00:52:20,805 --> 00:52:22,338
EXCELLENT,
EXCELLENT ROSIE.
1165
00:52:22,340 --> 00:52:23,706
NOW REMEMBER, TO KEEP UP
THE ATTACK ONCE HE GOES DOWN,
1166
00:52:23,708 --> 00:52:25,841
YOU DO NOT WANT HIM
GETTING BACK UP. GO.
1167
00:52:25,843 --> 00:52:30,479
HA, HA, HA, HA,
1168
00:52:30,481 --> 00:52:35,484
HA, HA, HA, HA!
1169
00:52:35,486 --> 00:52:37,086
EXCELLENT,
EXCELLENT.
1170
00:52:37,088 --> 00:52:38,487
ALRIGHT, NEXT.
1171
00:52:50,567 --> 00:52:56,805
Derek:
LEOPOLD, I HAVE COME FORTH
TO ASK FOR YOUR ASSISTANCE.
1172
00:52:56,807 --> 00:53:00,509
I'D LIKE YOU TO JOIN
THE BLACK CRUSADE.
1173
00:53:00,511 --> 00:53:06,649
WE ARE ORCS, YOUR FAVORED
RACE IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY.
1174
00:53:06,651 --> 00:53:12,021
THE ONLY THING STANDING BETWEEN
US AND VICTORY, IS ANDY.
1175
00:53:12,023 --> 00:53:13,589
♪
1176
00:53:13,591 --> 00:53:15,925
THE WHITE WIZARD
HAS RE-EMERGED.
1177
00:53:15,927 --> 00:53:17,860
INDEED.
1178
00:53:17,862 --> 00:53:20,262
AND HE HAS
TAKEN NEW STUDENTS.
1179
00:53:20,264 --> 00:53:21,697
I'VE HEARD HIM BOAST
THAT THEY WILL BE
1180
00:53:21,699 --> 00:53:25,267
100 TIMES MORE POWERFUL
THAN YOU EVER WERE.
1181
00:53:25,269 --> 00:53:28,437
REVENGE WILL BE
YOURS IF YOU SERVE ME.
1182
00:53:28,439 --> 00:53:32,675
♪
1183
00:53:32,677 --> 00:53:34,977
I BOW ONLY TO
THE BLOOD GODS.
1184
00:53:34,979 --> 00:53:36,278
OF COURSE.
1185
00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:38,214
I JUST MEANT,
SURELY YOUR BLOOD GODS
1186
00:53:38,216 --> 00:53:41,050
WOULD NOT WANT TO SEE
THE WHITE WIZARD RETURN.
1187
00:53:41,052 --> 00:53:44,587
IF YOUR DESTINY
SERVES THEIR WILL,
1188
00:53:44,589 --> 00:53:48,257
THEN I AM
YOURS TO COMMAND.
1189
00:53:48,259 --> 00:53:51,460
AS LONG AS YOU KNOW
WHO THE BOSS IS.
1190
00:53:54,731 --> 00:53:59,301
THAT HAS NEVER
BEEN IN QUESTION.
1191
00:53:59,303 --> 00:54:04,673
♪
1192
00:54:04,675 --> 00:54:05,975
- AH!
- OH!
1193
00:54:05,977 --> 00:54:07,109
OH, AH!
1194
00:54:07,111 --> 00:54:10,012
EXCELLENT POWER ROSE,
I MEANT BETH,
1195
00:54:10,014 --> 00:54:11,480
DOG THE BOUNTY
HUNTER'S WIFE.
1196
00:54:11,482 --> 00:54:12,715
GO SHOW THEM.
1197
00:54:14,718 --> 00:54:16,051
OK.
1198
00:54:16,053 --> 00:54:17,853
STEADY.
1199
00:54:17,855 --> 00:54:21,023
I THINK ROSIE'S
REALLY IMPROVING.
1200
00:54:21,025 --> 00:54:23,926
I PITY THE PERVERT WHO
TRIES TO TAKE HER FLOWER.
1201
00:54:23,928 --> 00:54:26,462
YOU KNOW LLOYD, I NEED TO TALK
TO YOU IN THE BACK OFFICE.
1202
00:54:26,464 --> 00:54:27,463
SURE.
1203
00:54:27,465 --> 00:54:29,732
YOU'RE GONNA
HAVE TO HELP ME.
1204
00:54:29,734 --> 00:54:31,233
THANK YOU.
1205
00:54:38,341 --> 00:54:42,211
LOOK, I JUST, I WANTED TO
THANK YOU FOR HELPING US,
1206
00:54:42,213 --> 00:54:44,313
I KNOW
IT'S NOT EASY.
1207
00:54:44,315 --> 00:54:45,648
NO PROBLEM.
1208
00:54:45,650 --> 00:54:47,716
I THINK I FOUND
MY TRUE CALLING.
1209
00:54:47,718 --> 00:54:49,752
NO, BUT I MEAN, REALLY,
I DON'T' WANT THE GIRLS
1210
00:54:49,754 --> 00:54:53,522
TO SEE ME GET ALL MUSHY,
BUT THANK YOU.
1211
00:54:53,524 --> 00:54:55,891
OK.
1212
00:54:55,893 --> 00:54:58,594
AND I WANTED TO TELL
YOU SOMETHING TOO.
1213
00:54:58,596 --> 00:55:03,932
AND THAT IS THAT I THINK
YOU'RE A REALLY COOL GIRL,
1214
00:55:03,934 --> 00:55:08,504
AND I WAS WONDERING
IF YOU AND I COULD MAYBE
1215
00:55:08,506 --> 00:55:10,506
HANG OUT SOMETIME?
1216
00:55:10,508 --> 00:55:14,176
MMMPH, WE HANG OUT
A LOT ALREADY.
1217
00:55:14,178 --> 00:55:15,544
- OK. OK.
- OK.
1218
00:55:15,546 --> 00:55:16,612
WAIT!
1219
00:55:16,614 --> 00:55:17,646
YES.
1220
00:55:17,648 --> 00:55:21,183
UH...
1221
00:55:21,185 --> 00:55:22,384
JUST LET ME FINISH.
1222
00:55:22,386 --> 00:55:23,752
OK.
1223
00:55:23,754 --> 00:55:27,423
UM, I JUST WANTED
TO SAY THAT, UH...
1224
00:55:27,425 --> 00:55:28,624
♪
1225
00:55:28,626 --> 00:55:31,960
UM, I WANT TO...
1226
00:55:31,962 --> 00:55:34,697
♪
1227
00:55:34,699 --> 00:55:36,231
I UM...
1228
00:55:36,233 --> 00:55:39,968
♪
1229
00:55:39,970 --> 00:55:42,538
I WANT TO LONG DICK
YOUR QUIVERING SEX HOLE!
1230
00:55:49,479 --> 00:55:50,879
I AM SO SORRY.
1231
00:55:50,881 --> 00:55:52,047
SHUT UP!
1232
00:55:58,755 --> 00:56:00,956
OSWALD, ARE WE GONNA
PRACTICE TODAY, OR WHAT?
1233
00:56:00,958 --> 00:56:02,324
GIMME A MINUTE.
1234
00:56:09,599 --> 00:56:10,899
COME ON BUDDY,
HURRY UP,
1235
00:56:10,901 --> 00:56:13,068
IT'S NOT GONNA MAKE
YOU LOSE ANY QUICKER.
1236
00:56:22,445 --> 00:56:23,679
I DIDN'T MEAN
TO LEAD YOU ON,
1237
00:56:23,681 --> 00:56:24,880
I DON'T WANT TO GIVE
YOU THE WRONG IDEA.
1238
00:56:24,882 --> 00:56:26,548
AAAAA!
1239
00:56:26,550 --> 00:56:29,651
AH!
1240
00:56:29,653 --> 00:56:32,421
HEY, HEY, HEY.
OSWALD, OSWALD.
1241
00:56:32,423 --> 00:56:34,256
AH!
1242
00:56:34,258 --> 00:56:36,024
AAAAAA!
1243
00:56:37,394 --> 00:56:39,428
AAAAAA!
1244
00:56:39,430 --> 00:56:42,364
(Screaming and Grunting)
1245
00:56:44,067 --> 00:56:45,234
(Oswald Screams)
1246
00:56:45,236 --> 00:56:48,404
(Panting)
1247
00:56:48,406 --> 00:56:50,506
THAT WAS INTENSE.
1248
00:56:50,508 --> 00:56:51,540
WAS?
1249
00:56:51,542 --> 00:56:53,509
WE'RE NOT DONE YET.
1250
00:56:55,011 --> 00:56:57,613
YES, WE ARE
DOING THIS NEXT.
1251
00:56:57,615 --> 00:57:01,049
UH, I DON'T THINK I HAVE THE
UPPER BODY STRENGTH TO DO THAT.
1252
00:57:01,051 --> 00:57:02,818
OH, I THINK WITH
THE RIGHT MOTIVATION.
1253
00:57:02,820 --> 00:57:04,019
AAH!
1254
00:57:04,021 --> 00:57:06,422
I'LL GIVE IT
A SHOT, I MEAN,
1255
00:57:06,424 --> 00:57:07,823
WHAT'S THE WORST
THAT CAN HAPPEN?
1256
00:57:16,933 --> 00:57:19,668
Andy:
I TOLD YOUI CANNOT AFFORD THAT.
1257
00:57:19,670 --> 00:57:23,639
GO AHEAD,
WON'T HURT TO TOUCH IT.
1258
00:57:26,543 --> 00:57:28,544
THAT'S IT.
1259
00:57:28,546 --> 00:57:31,547
PERHAPS WE CAN
WORK SOMETHING OUT.
1260
00:57:31,549 --> 00:57:33,315
IT'S MINT.
1261
00:57:33,317 --> 00:57:35,184
ALL YOU MUST DO
IS MAKE SURE YOUR
1262
00:57:35,186 --> 00:57:38,086
NEW STUDENTS
FAIL SPECTACULARLY.
1263
00:57:40,356 --> 00:57:43,725
FOUL TEMPTRESS,
I REFUSE THEE.
1264
00:57:43,727 --> 00:57:48,664
PERHAPS TWENTY DUCATS
WILL SWEETEN THE DEAL.
1265
00:57:48,666 --> 00:57:50,065
NEVER.
1266
00:57:50,067 --> 00:57:53,502
YOU STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT.
1267
00:57:53,504 --> 00:57:56,839
VERY WELL.
1268
00:57:59,175 --> 00:58:01,210
SAVE YOUR APPLAUSE.
1269
00:58:01,212 --> 00:58:03,111
NO.
1270
00:58:03,113 --> 00:58:07,015
[ ♪ ]
1271
00:58:07,017 --> 00:58:09,184
♪
1272
00:58:09,186 --> 00:58:10,919
THE WHITE WIZARD.
1273
00:58:10,921 --> 00:58:14,690
I BELIEVE YOU TWO
KNOW EACH OTHER.
1274
00:58:14,692 --> 00:58:18,293
YOU'VE GROWN
OLD AND WEAK.
1275
00:58:18,295 --> 00:58:21,430
I DRAW MY STRENGTH
NOT FROM WITHIN,
1276
00:58:21,432 --> 00:58:25,601
BUT FROM THOSE WHO LARP
AND ARE PURE OF HEART.
1277
00:58:25,603 --> 00:58:28,437
IF ONLY YOU KNEW THE
POWER OF THE BLOOD GODS.
1278
00:58:28,439 --> 00:58:31,673
IF YOU'RE ITS EXAMPLE,
THEN COLOR ME UNIMPRESSED.
1279
00:58:31,675 --> 00:58:33,308
♪
1280
00:58:33,310 --> 00:58:35,544
I DEFEATED YOU,
DIDN'T I?
1281
00:58:35,546 --> 00:58:37,513
LOW BLOW.
1282
00:58:37,515 --> 00:58:41,550
SOMETIMES IT IS THE LOWEST
BLOW THAT STRIKES THE HARDEST.
1283
00:58:41,552 --> 00:58:44,486
YEAH, I DON'T HAVE
A COMEBACK FOR THAT ONE.
1284
00:58:44,488 --> 00:58:48,524
BUT REST ASSURED, I WILL DO
EVERYTHING WITHIN MY POWER
1285
00:58:48,526 --> 00:58:51,793
TO MAKE SURE THAT YOU ARE
VANQUISHED ON THE BATTLEFIELD.
1286
00:58:51,795 --> 00:58:53,629
AND I WILL BE SURE
TO TASTE THE FRESH BLOOD
1287
00:58:53,631 --> 00:58:55,664
OF YOUR
NEW STUDENTS.
1288
00:58:55,666 --> 00:58:58,000
LEAVE THEM
OUT OF THIS,
1289
00:58:58,002 --> 00:59:01,436
FOR THIS IS
BETWEEN YOU AND ME.
1290
00:59:01,438 --> 00:59:03,071
OH?
1291
00:59:03,073 --> 00:59:05,941
OR IS IT BETWEEN
YOU AND I?
1292
00:59:05,943 --> 00:59:10,212
♪
1293
00:59:10,214 --> 00:59:14,883
I'M WARNING YOU, THEY WILL NOT
SUCCUMB TO YOUR DARK TREATS.
1294
00:59:14,885 --> 00:59:16,351
HA.
1295
00:59:16,353 --> 00:59:19,021
YOU WILL PROTECT
THEM FROM THE SHADOWS,
1296
00:59:19,023 --> 00:59:20,589
AS YOU PROTECTED ME?
1297
00:59:20,591 --> 00:59:22,558
♪
1298
00:59:22,560 --> 00:59:24,793
YOU WOULDN'T DARE.
1299
00:59:24,795 --> 00:59:27,963
I WOULD DARE.
1300
00:59:27,965 --> 00:59:29,231
NO.
1301
00:59:29,233 --> 00:59:30,632
YEAH.
1302
00:59:30,634 --> 00:59:31,633
NO.
1303
00:59:31,635 --> 00:59:33,435
- YEAH.
- NAH UH.
1304
00:59:33,437 --> 00:59:34,970
- I'M GONNA DO IT.
- NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
1305
00:59:34,972 --> 00:59:35,971
IT'S HAPPENING.
1306
00:59:35,973 --> 00:59:36,972
BETTER NOT.
1307
00:59:36,974 --> 00:59:38,307
- YEAH, I AM.
- NAH UH.
1308
00:59:38,309 --> 00:59:40,475
I SAID IT, THEN I
REPEATED IT SEVERAL TIME--
1309
00:59:40,477 --> 00:59:44,379
FOR THE LOVE OF
ODIN'S SACK, ENOUGH.
1310
00:59:44,381 --> 00:59:47,015
TO THINK I
ALMOST WASTED MY
1311
00:59:47,017 --> 00:59:50,919
PRINCE FINNTOR ON
A CRY BABY LIKE YOU.
1312
00:59:50,921 --> 00:59:52,654
WAH.
1313
00:59:52,656 --> 00:59:55,424
WAH.
1314
00:59:55,426 --> 00:59:58,760
[ ♪ ]
1315
00:59:58,762 --> 01:00:06,969
♪
1316
01:00:06,971 --> 01:00:08,904
CRUEL DESTINY.
1317
01:00:11,674 --> 01:00:15,310
Lloyd:
ANDY, WHAT'S WRONG, YOU
SAID YOU HAD IMPORTANT NEWS?
1318
01:00:15,312 --> 01:00:16,878
Andy:
I DO.
1319
01:00:16,880 --> 01:00:19,081
TELL ME, WHAT WOULD
YOU LIKE TO HEAR FIRST,
1320
01:00:19,083 --> 01:00:21,650
THE GOOD NEWS,
OR THE BAD NEWS?
1321
01:00:21,652 --> 01:00:23,018
♪
1322
01:00:23,020 --> 01:00:24,519
OR THE
REALLY BAD NEWS?
1323
01:00:24,521 --> 01:00:26,021
THE GOOD NEWS.
1324
01:00:26,023 --> 01:00:28,123
NO, I THINK WE SHOULD
LISTEN TO THE BAD NEWS FIRST,
1325
01:00:28,125 --> 01:00:30,025
THEN THE GOOD, THEN
THE REALLY BAD NEWS,
1326
01:00:30,027 --> 01:00:31,293
SO WE BREAK UP
THE BAD THINGS.
1327
01:00:31,295 --> 01:00:32,728
WHY DON'T WE DO
THE GOOD LAST,
1328
01:00:32,730 --> 01:00:34,129
AND THEN WE CAN END THE
MEETING ON AN UPBEAT NOTE?
1329
01:00:34,131 --> 01:00:35,631
YEAH, BUT THEN WE RUN
THE RISK OF NOT TAKING
1330
01:00:35,633 --> 01:00:37,332
THE REALLY BAD NEWS AS
SERIOUSLY AS WE SHOULD.
1331
01:00:37,334 --> 01:00:39,301
Patrick:
WHY DON'T WE JUST START
WITH THE REALLY BAD NEWS?
1332
01:00:39,303 --> 01:00:41,269
THEN WE'D HAVE THE SAME
PROBLEM OSWALD BROUGHT UP.
1333
01:00:41,271 --> 01:00:42,504
OK, SHUT UP.
1334
01:00:42,506 --> 01:00:44,272
IT'S GONNA GO GOOD,
BAD, THEN REALLY BAD.
1335
01:00:44,274 --> 01:00:45,374
NO, BUT LLOYD--
1336
01:00:45,376 --> 01:00:47,509
I'M THE LEADER,
AND THAT'S MY ORDER.
1337
01:00:47,511 --> 01:00:50,045
FINE, WHATEVER, IT'S NOT
EVEN THAT BIG A DEAL.
1338
01:00:50,047 --> 01:00:51,279
GOOD.
1339
01:00:51,281 --> 01:00:53,382
ANDY, PLEASE CONTINUE,
GOOD NEWS FIRST.
1340
01:00:53,384 --> 01:00:55,717
THE FINAL SCORES
FOR THE SEASON ARE IN,
1341
01:00:55,719 --> 01:00:57,919
AND LLOYD AND
THE CONQUERORS
1342
01:00:57,921 --> 01:01:02,090
ARE THE HIGHEST RANKED
TEAM ON THE SIDE OF LIGHT.
1343
01:01:02,092 --> 01:01:03,458
YES!
1344
01:01:03,460 --> 01:01:04,559
WHOO!
1345
01:01:04,561 --> 01:01:05,761
SO WE WON?
1346
01:01:05,763 --> 01:01:07,095
AND WE GET TO PASS
DEREK'S STUPID CLASS?
1347
01:01:07,097 --> 01:01:08,597
NOT EXACTLY.
1348
01:01:08,599 --> 01:01:11,299
AS THE HIGHEST RANKED
TEAM IN YOUR FACTION,
1349
01:01:11,301 --> 01:01:14,503
IT IS YOUR DUTY TO
LEAD THE FORCES OF LIGHT
1350
01:01:14,505 --> 01:01:16,672
IN THE FINALBATTLE OF THE SEASON.
1351
01:01:16,674 --> 01:01:17,873
SAY WHAT?
1352
01:01:17,875 --> 01:01:19,508
WELL, EACH YEAR,
THE LARPING SEASON ENDS
1353
01:01:19,510 --> 01:01:22,878
WITH A FINAL BATTLE,
FEATURING THE FORCES OF LIGHT
1354
01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:25,147
AGAINST THE
HORDES OF CHAOS.
1355
01:01:25,149 --> 01:01:28,817
LLOYD, YOU WILL BE
COMMANDING THOSE FORCES.
1356
01:01:28,819 --> 01:01:30,252
ME?
1357
01:01:30,254 --> 01:01:33,188
AND I BET I CAN GUESS WHO'S
GONNA LEAD THE OTHER SIDE?
1358
01:01:33,190 --> 01:01:34,356
DEREK.
1359
01:01:34,358 --> 01:01:35,724
UNFORTUNATELY YES.
1360
01:01:35,726 --> 01:01:37,092
SO THAT'S
THE BAD NEWS?
1361
01:01:37,094 --> 01:01:40,462
OH, YOUNG OSWALD,
IF ONLY IT WERE SO.
1362
01:01:40,464 --> 01:01:44,132
NO. THE FINAL BATTLE
TAKES PLACE THIS WEEKEND.
1363
01:01:44,134 --> 01:01:47,769
AND CASSANDRA WILL
NOT BE ON YOUR SIDE.
1364
01:01:47,771 --> 01:01:49,171
CRAP IN A HAT!
1365
01:01:49,173 --> 01:01:50,372
Lloyd:
WE'VE SEENDEREK ON THE FIELD,
1366
01:01:50,374 --> 01:01:51,640
AS LONG AS WE HAVE
A GOOD GAME PLAN,
1367
01:01:51,642 --> 01:01:53,341
AND WORK TOGETHER,
WE HAVE A CHANCE.
1368
01:01:53,343 --> 01:01:58,313
YES, WE HAVE A CHANCE,
WE HAVE A CHANCE.
1369
01:01:58,315 --> 01:02:00,048
ANDY, WHY DON'T YOU JUST
COME OUT OF RETIREMENT
1370
01:02:00,050 --> 01:02:01,650
AND TAKE MY
PLACE ON THE TEAM?
1371
01:02:01,652 --> 01:02:02,651
IF YOU HAD ASKED
ME THIS MORNING,
1372
01:02:02,653 --> 01:02:04,753
I MIGHT
HAVE SAID YES.
1373
01:02:04,755 --> 01:02:09,424
BUT NOW I SEE THAT IT'S YOUR
PATH TO FOLLOW, NOT MINE.
1374
01:02:09,426 --> 01:02:12,127
DOES THIS HAVE SOMETHING TO
DO WITH THE REALLY BAD NEWS?
1375
01:02:12,129 --> 01:02:14,096
IT DOES.
1376
01:02:14,098 --> 01:02:16,765
THIS AFTERNOON, DEREK
PRESENTED HIMSELF TO ME.
1377
01:02:16,767 --> 01:02:21,636
HE OFFERED ME A MINT COPY
OF PRINCE FINNTOR NUMBER ONE.
1378
01:02:21,638 --> 01:02:23,839
THAT SON OF A BITCH.
1379
01:02:23,841 --> 01:02:26,141
YES, INDEED.
1380
01:02:26,143 --> 01:02:29,878
HE OFFERED ME THE BOOK, IF
I WOULD ENSURE YOUR FAILURE.
1381
01:02:29,880 --> 01:02:32,547
AND YOU THREW IT RIGHT
BACK IN HIS FACE, RIGHT?
1382
01:02:32,549 --> 01:02:33,915
NEVER.
1383
01:02:33,917 --> 01:02:36,585
FINNTOR NUMBER ONE IS
AN IMPORTANT DOCUMENT
1384
01:02:36,587 --> 01:02:39,821
THAT MUST BE PRESERVED
FOR POSTERITY'S SAKE.
1385
01:02:39,823 --> 01:02:41,890
BUT YOU DID TURN
HIM DOWN, RIGHT?
1386
01:02:41,892 --> 01:02:44,226
OH, OF COURSE.
1387
01:02:44,228 --> 01:02:47,295
IT WAS THEN THAT HE
REVEALED HIS ALLIANCE
1388
01:02:47,297 --> 01:02:50,899
WITH LEOPOLD,
MY FORMER STUDENT.
1389
01:02:50,901 --> 01:02:52,567
MY GREATEST STUDENT.
1390
01:02:52,569 --> 01:02:55,737
HOW DID DEREK GET ONE OF YOUR
STUDENTS TO JOIN THE BAD GUYS?
1391
01:02:55,739 --> 01:02:57,706
IT WASN'T THROUGH
DEREK'S CUNNING,
1392
01:02:57,708 --> 01:03:00,008
BUT MORE THROUGH MY
FAILURE AS A TEACHER.
1393
01:03:00,010 --> 01:03:02,544
♪
1394
01:03:02,546 --> 01:03:05,380
WHEN LEOPOLD FIRST
CAME UNDER MY TUTELAGE,
1395
01:03:05,382 --> 01:03:08,884
HE WAS THE MOST EAGER
LARPER I HAD EVER SEEN.
1396
01:03:08,886 --> 01:03:11,753
HE IMMERSED HIMSELFIN THE FANTASY,
1397
01:03:11,755 --> 01:03:15,123
SHARPENING HIS MINDAND BODY UNTIL HE BECAME
1398
01:03:15,125 --> 01:03:18,293
THE GREATESTWARRIOR IN THE LAND.
1399
01:03:18,295 --> 01:03:21,963
HIS STRENGTH WAS SUCH THAT EVEN
THE LOCAL SCHOOL CHILDREN NO
1400
01:03:21,965 --> 01:03:26,101
LONGER HARASSED US WHEN WE USED
THEIR PLAYGROUND FOR LARPING.
1401
01:03:26,103 --> 01:03:29,004
NO ONE STOODAGAINST HIM.
1402
01:03:29,006 --> 01:03:30,872
AND I, OF COURSE,
ENCOURAGED HIM,
1403
01:03:30,874 --> 01:03:34,009
THINKING THAT HE WOULD
REMAIN OUR CHAMPION OF LIGHT,
1404
01:03:34,011 --> 01:03:38,513
AND WOULD FOREVER KEEP
THE FORCES OF EVIL AT BAY.
1405
01:03:38,515 --> 01:03:42,250
I SHOULD HAVE TAUGHT HIM
TEMPERANCE AND PATIENCE,
1406
01:03:42,252 --> 01:03:45,086
FOR HIS QUESTFOR POWER LED HIM
1407
01:03:45,088 --> 01:03:51,126
TO EMBRACE THEBLOOD GODS OF CHAOS.
1408
01:03:51,128 --> 01:03:54,796
HE FELL DEEPERAND DEEPER,
1409
01:03:54,798 --> 01:03:58,600
UNTIL HE STARTED TO BELIEVEIN HIS OWN DARK FANTASIES.
1410
01:03:58,602 --> 01:04:00,936
IT ALL ENDEDONE TERRIBLE NIGHT,
1411
01:04:00,938 --> 01:04:04,339
WHEN HE BECAMECONVINCED THAT HIS FAMILY
1412
01:04:04,341 --> 01:04:07,275
WAS ACTUALLYA PACK OF GNOMES
1413
01:04:07,277 --> 01:04:11,313
TRYING TO STEALHIS MAGIC ARMOR.
1414
01:04:11,315 --> 01:04:14,015
AFTER HE SET HISSISTER'S DOG ON FIRE,
1415
01:04:14,017 --> 01:04:17,419
HE WAS DEPOSITED IN THELOCAL MENTAL INSTITUTION,
1416
01:04:17,421 --> 01:04:21,423
WHERE HE HAS
REMAINED UNTIL DEREK
1417
01:04:21,425 --> 01:04:24,459
SUMMONED HIM
FOR HIS DARK PACT.
1418
01:04:24,461 --> 01:04:26,561
SO BASICALLY WHAT YOU'RE
SAYING IS WE HAVE TO DEFEAT
1419
01:04:26,563 --> 01:04:29,064
THE DARTH VADER
OF LARPING?
1420
01:04:29,066 --> 01:04:31,967
I WOULD NEVER COMPARE
THESE EPIC EVENTS
1421
01:04:31,969 --> 01:04:35,237
TO THAT CRUDE
SPACE OPERA.
1422
01:04:35,239 --> 01:04:37,839
BUT YEAH,
BASICALLY.
1423
01:04:37,841 --> 01:04:39,774
HMMM...
1424
01:04:43,613 --> 01:04:45,113
THAT GUY'S
CERTAINLY A VIRGIN.
1425
01:04:45,115 --> 01:04:47,749
MAYBE THERE'S A WAY WE CAN
JUST VOLUNTEER, YOU KNOW?
1426
01:04:47,751 --> 01:04:50,385
WE DON'T HAVE TO ACTUALLY
LARP AND GET KILLED,
1427
01:04:50,387 --> 01:04:51,586
WE CANJUST HELP OUT.
1428
01:04:51,588 --> 01:04:52,754
IT'S FINE,
GUYS IT'S FINE,
1429
01:04:52,756 --> 01:04:53,955
WE'LL FIGURE
SOMETHING OUT.
1430
01:04:55,758 --> 01:04:58,126
LLOYD,
AS THEIR LEADER,
1431
01:04:58,128 --> 01:05:02,297
THERE'S SOMETHING I MUST
SHARE WITH YOU, ALONE.
1432
01:05:02,299 --> 01:05:06,401
[ ♪ ]
1433
01:05:06,403 --> 01:05:10,505
♪
1434
01:05:10,507 --> 01:05:11,973
IT'S BEEN
A LONG TIME,
1435
01:05:11,975 --> 01:05:13,842
BUT I KNOW IT'S
IN HERE SOMEWHERE.
1436
01:05:13,844 --> 01:05:15,510
[Cupboard Door Creaks Open]
1437
01:05:15,512 --> 01:05:19,814
HAH, THERE IT IS.
1438
01:05:19,816 --> 01:05:22,384
♪
1439
01:05:22,386 --> 01:05:24,986
PERHAPS YOU CAN
FIND A USE FOR THIS.
1440
01:05:24,988 --> 01:05:26,855
♪
1441
01:05:26,857 --> 01:05:29,958
ANDY, IS THIS WHAT
I THINK IT IS?
1442
01:05:29,960 --> 01:05:32,627
INDEED, IT IS.
1443
01:05:32,629 --> 01:05:36,097
♪
1444
01:05:36,099 --> 01:05:37,666
IF I WASN'T
OUT OF COMMISSION,
1445
01:05:37,668 --> 01:05:39,935
I WOULD TAKE THIS LEOPOLD
CLOWN OUT IN 12 SECONDS FLAT.
1446
01:05:39,937 --> 01:05:41,836
BELIEVE ME,
I WISH YOU COULD TOO.
1447
01:05:41,838 --> 01:05:43,238
ALL YOU NEED IS
A GOOD STRATEGY,
1448
01:05:43,240 --> 01:05:44,306
I CAN STILL HELP
YOU WITH THAT.
1449
01:05:44,308 --> 01:05:45,840
ANDY THINKS THIS
GUY IS DANGEROUS,
1450
01:05:45,842 --> 01:05:47,475
I DON'T WANT TO BE PART
OF SOMEBODY BEING HURT.
1451
01:05:47,477 --> 01:05:49,778
DO YOU KNOW WHAT I TEACH THE
GIRLS IN MY SELF DEFENSE CLASS?
1452
01:05:49,780 --> 01:05:51,613
PREDATORS PREY
ON THE WEAK.
1453
01:05:51,615 --> 01:05:53,214
SO JUST USE YOUR
PERCEIVED WEAKNESS
1454
01:05:53,216 --> 01:05:55,016
TO CATCH THE
ASSAILANT OFF GUARD.
1455
01:05:55,018 --> 01:05:58,653
AND THEN YOU JUST
REMOVE HIS TESTICLES
1456
01:05:58,655 --> 01:06:00,655
WITH A SHAOLIN
TIGER GRIP.
1457
01:06:01,924 --> 01:06:05,894
WHO KNEW SELF DEFENSE
COULD BE SO HOT?
1458
01:06:05,896 --> 01:06:07,028
FOCUS.
1459
01:06:07,030 --> 01:06:11,633
[ ♪ ]
1460
01:06:11,635 --> 01:06:19,174
♪
1461
01:06:19,176 --> 01:06:21,142
HALF A MOON FROM NOW,
1462
01:06:21,144 --> 01:06:24,980
THE COMBINED FORCES OF
LIGHT WILL STAND BEFORE US.
1463
01:06:24,982 --> 01:06:26,815
BUT THEIRS IS
A HOPELESS CAUSE,
1464
01:06:26,817 --> 01:06:30,085
THEIR MANTRA IS HONOR
AND RIGHTEOUSNESS,
1465
01:06:30,087 --> 01:06:33,688
BUT THERE'S NO
HONOR IN DEFEAT.
1466
01:06:33,690 --> 01:06:38,526
AND IT IS THE VICTOR WHO
DEFINES WHAT IS RIGHTEOUS.
1467
01:06:38,528 --> 01:06:42,063
EVERY YEAR THESE WEAKLINGS
FALL UNDER OUR BLADE,
1468
01:06:42,065 --> 01:06:44,632
AND THIS YEAR SHALL
BE NO EXCEPTION.
1469
01:06:44,634 --> 01:06:46,067
♪
1470
01:06:46,069 --> 01:06:48,970
HALF A MOON FROM NOW,
WHAT TIME IS THAT EXACTLY?
1471
01:06:48,972 --> 01:06:50,805
JUST SO I CAN
SYNC MY WATCH.
1472
01:06:50,807 --> 01:06:54,943
I AM NOT REQUIRED TO
EXPLAIN WHAT HALF A MOON IS.
1473
01:06:54,945 --> 01:06:56,778
IF YOU DO NOT KNOW
WHAT HALF A MOON IS,
1474
01:06:56,780 --> 01:06:58,880
YOU SHOULD
NOT BE HERE.
1475
01:06:58,882 --> 01:07:00,749
THERE ARE TALES THAT WE
SHALL FACE THE DISCIPLES
1476
01:07:00,751 --> 01:07:03,084
OF THE PROPHET
OF LIGHT,
1477
01:07:03,086 --> 01:07:04,519
THE WHITE WIZARD.
1478
01:07:04,521 --> 01:07:07,956
YES IT IS TRUE, THE
DISCIPLES OF THE WHITE WIZARD
1479
01:07:07,958 --> 01:07:10,592
LEAD THE FORCES OF LIGHT,
AND IF THAT CONCERNS YOU
1480
01:07:10,594 --> 01:07:13,395
OR ANYONE ELSE HERE,
THEN FUCK OFF!
1481
01:07:13,397 --> 01:07:15,430
♪
1482
01:07:15,432 --> 01:07:19,501
I LIVE BY THE ANCIENT
KRAKENTROLL PROVERB:
1483
01:07:19,503 --> 01:07:21,669
IF YOUR OPPONENT
BRANDISHES A STAVE,
1484
01:07:21,671 --> 01:07:25,840
THEN IN TURN YOU MUST
UNSHEATHE YOUR CLAYMORE.
1485
01:07:25,842 --> 01:07:27,308
♪
1486
01:07:27,310 --> 01:07:29,711
LEOPOLD,
STEP FORWARD.
1487
01:07:29,713 --> 01:07:32,480
THOSE OF YOU
WHO CHOOSE TO STAY
1488
01:07:32,482 --> 01:07:36,484
WILL STAND SHOULDER TO
SHOULDER WITH NONE OTHER
1489
01:07:36,486 --> 01:07:40,155
THAN LEOPOLDTHE DESTROYER.
1490
01:07:40,157 --> 01:07:42,791
DEATH TO THE WHITE WIZARD!
1491
01:07:42,793 --> 01:07:44,125
Crowd:
DEATH TO THE WHITE WIZARD!
1492
01:07:44,127 --> 01:07:46,327
AAHH!
1493
01:07:47,797 --> 01:07:49,731
THEN YOU JUST
COME AROUND HERE,
1494
01:07:49,733 --> 01:07:52,233
AND BOOM,
HIS BALLS ARE YOURS.
1495
01:07:57,940 --> 01:07:59,507
THIS COULD
ACTUALLY WORK.
1496
01:07:59,509 --> 01:08:02,210
[ ♪ ]
1497
01:08:02,212 --> 01:08:04,712
YOU LEAVE IN PIECES.
1498
01:08:04,714 --> 01:08:06,247
Oswald:
LOOK AT HIM.
1499
01:08:06,249 --> 01:08:08,383
I MEAN, WHAT DO GUYS LIKE
THAT DO IN THEIR SPARE TIME?
1500
01:08:08,385 --> 01:08:09,984
I MEAN,
DOES HE CROSS-STITCH,
1501
01:08:09,986 --> 01:08:12,387
WORK ON CARS,
OR SCRAPBOOK?
1502
01:08:12,389 --> 01:08:13,955
REALLY SUCCESSFUL GUYS
LIKE THAT ALWAYS HAVE
1503
01:08:13,957 --> 01:08:16,458
SOME SORT OF DARK SECRET,
LIKE I BET YOU HE'S INTO
1504
01:08:16,460 --> 01:08:19,461
SOME WEIRD KIND OF
PORN OR SOMETHING.
1505
01:08:19,463 --> 01:08:20,728
PUPPET PORN?
1506
01:08:20,730 --> 01:08:24,666
YEAH, HE'S DEFINITELY
INTO PUPPET PORN.
1507
01:08:24,668 --> 01:08:25,667
THAT'S SICK.
1508
01:08:25,669 --> 01:08:27,502
[Door Opens]
1509
01:08:27,504 --> 01:08:28,803
YOU GUYS
READY FOR THIS?
1510
01:08:28,805 --> 01:08:31,840
FOR WHAT, MISTER I
DIDN'T SHOW UP LAST NIGHT.
1511
01:08:31,842 --> 01:08:33,441
TO GO OVER
THE BATTLE PLAN.
1512
01:08:33,443 --> 01:08:36,211
OH, I'VE ALREADY GOT ONE,
FIRST WE GET SURROUNDED,
1513
01:08:36,213 --> 01:08:37,879
THEN LEOPOLD BEATS
THE CRAP OUT OF US,
1514
01:08:37,881 --> 01:08:39,881
THEN WE LOSE THE GAME
AND FAIL THE CLASS.
1515
01:08:39,883 --> 01:08:41,850
YOUR BRIGHT OUTLOOK
IS VERY INSPIRING.
1516
01:08:41,852 --> 01:08:43,585
YEAH, SO IS HE WAY
I BANGED YOUR MOM.
1517
01:08:46,489 --> 01:08:49,190
SO SINCE YOU JUST SAID
YOU HAD SEX WITH MY MOM,
1518
01:08:49,192 --> 01:08:50,291
I DON'T FEEL
NEARLY AS BAD
1519
01:08:50,293 --> 01:08:52,227
ABOUT THE CONFESSION
I HAVE TO MAKE.
1520
01:08:52,229 --> 01:08:53,695
AND WHAT'S THAT?
1521
01:08:53,697 --> 01:08:54,796
DEREK OFFERED
US AN EASY OUT,
1522
01:08:54,798 --> 01:08:56,631
AND I TOLD HIM TO
GO SCREW HIMSELF.
1523
01:08:56,633 --> 01:08:58,433
WHAT'S HE TALKING
ABOUT PATRICK?
1524
01:08:58,435 --> 01:09:00,168
HE SAID IF WE DROPPED OUT OF
THE DEMONS AND DWARVES LARP,
1525
01:09:00,170 --> 01:09:01,836
HE'D GO AHEAD
AND GIVE US A 'C'.
1526
01:09:01,838 --> 01:09:03,338
AND YOU REFUSED?
1527
01:09:03,340 --> 01:09:05,039
YEAH, I DID.
MM-HMM.
1528
01:09:05,041 --> 01:09:08,376
AND IF WE DON'T WIN AND
GET THE 'A+', WE FAIL.
1529
01:09:08,378 --> 01:09:09,611
WHAT THE F, LLOYD?!
1530
01:09:09,613 --> 01:09:11,713
WHY WOULD
YOU DO THAT?!
1531
01:09:11,715 --> 01:09:13,348
BECAUSE I WANTED
TO SHOW HIM,
1532
01:09:13,350 --> 01:09:14,716
AND ALL THE OTHER
DEREKS OF THE WORLD
1533
01:09:14,718 --> 01:09:16,351
THAT WE'RE NOT JUST GONNA
ROLL OVER AND TAKE IT.
1534
01:09:16,353 --> 01:09:18,653
WE WILL STAND,
AND WE WILL CONQUER.
1535
01:09:18,655 --> 01:09:19,854
NO, NO, NO,
WAIT A SECOND,
1536
01:09:19,856 --> 01:09:22,357
THIS HAS SOMETHING
TO DO WITH CASSANDRA.
1537
01:09:22,359 --> 01:09:23,424
NO.
1538
01:09:23,426 --> 01:09:25,360
Patrick:
YOU'RE RIGHT, OSWALD.
1539
01:09:25,362 --> 01:09:27,629
HE PUTS OUR GRADES ON THE LINE,
JUST SO HE CAN BANG CASSANDRA,
1540
01:09:27,631 --> 01:09:29,464
THEN HE FINALLY BANGS HER
AND HE BREAKS HER LEG,
1541
01:09:29,466 --> 01:09:32,066
NOW SHE CAN'T EVEN
HELP US GET AN 'A'.
1542
01:09:32,068 --> 01:09:34,769
IT'S OK, BECAUSE
CASSANDRA AND I CAME UP
1543
01:09:34,771 --> 01:09:37,005
WITH A REALLY
GREAT BATTLE PLAN.
1544
01:09:37,007 --> 01:09:40,008
YEAH, DOES YOUR
PLAN INCLUDE THIS?
1545
01:09:40,010 --> 01:09:47,215
♪
1546
01:09:47,217 --> 01:09:50,485
SINCE CLASS HAS BEEN
DISRUPTED DUE TO MY INJURY,
1547
01:09:50,487 --> 01:09:52,153
I'VE SCHEDULED A VERY
SPECIAL TRAINING SESSION
1548
01:09:52,155 --> 01:09:54,055
FOR THIS WEEKEND, IT WILL
GIVE YOU A CHANCE TO
1549
01:09:54,057 --> 01:09:56,424
REALLY UTILIZE THE SKILLS
YOU'VE LEARNED IN CLASS.
1550
01:09:56,426 --> 01:09:58,626
Male in Class:
THIS ISN'T
ANOTHER CLASS WHERE WE
1551
01:09:58,628 --> 01:10:00,795
FIGHT THE GUY IN THE
PADDED SUIT AGAIN, IS IT?
1552
01:10:00,797 --> 01:10:02,897
Rosie:
I DIDN'T FEEL THREATENED
BY THAT GUY AT ALL.
1553
01:10:02,899 --> 01:10:06,100
I JUST CAN'T WAIT TILL A
PERVERT REALLY COMES AFTER ME.
1554
01:10:06,102 --> 01:10:08,303
TRUST ME, THIS WILL
BE THE MOST INTENSE
1555
01:10:08,305 --> 01:10:11,139
TRAINING SESSION
YOU WILL EVER HAVE.
1556
01:10:11,141 --> 01:10:14,809
IT'LL BE JUST LIKE YOU'RE
SURROUNDED BY ACTUAL PERVERTS.
1557
01:10:14,811 --> 01:10:17,979
[ ♪ ]
1558
01:10:17,981 --> 01:10:24,018
♪
1559
01:10:24,020 --> 01:10:29,424
♪
1560
01:10:29,426 --> 01:10:30,592
♪
DICK.
1561
01:10:30,594 --> 01:10:39,234
♪
1562
01:10:39,236 --> 01:10:49,043
♪
1563
01:10:49,045 --> 01:10:59,053
♪
1564
01:10:59,055 --> 01:11:02,023
♪
1565
01:11:03,092 --> 01:11:06,728
HEY ELFY,
TWO QUESTIONS.
1566
01:11:06,730 --> 01:11:08,296
OK.
1567
01:11:08,298 --> 01:11:10,598
FIRST, I WANT TO
REGISTER, SECOND,
1568
01:11:10,600 --> 01:11:13,301
WHY ARE YOU DRESSED LIKE
A SCIENCE FICTION CHARACTER,
1569
01:11:13,303 --> 01:11:15,737
WHEN YOU'RE AT A FANTASY
LARPING TOURNAMENT?
1570
01:11:15,739 --> 01:11:19,207
FOR THE RECORD,
THAT WAS ONE QUESTION, OK?
1571
01:11:19,209 --> 01:11:20,875
AND TO ANSWER
YOUR ONE QUESTION,
1572
01:11:20,877 --> 01:11:23,878
UNLIKE EVERYONE
ELSE HERE,
1573
01:11:23,880 --> 01:11:27,582
I LIKE TO BE CREATIVE,
AND NOT FOLLOW THE CROWD.
1574
01:11:27,584 --> 01:11:29,384
MY CHARACTER IS
FROM STAR FLEET,
1575
01:11:29,386 --> 01:11:32,887
I'VE BEEN SENT BACK
IN TIME TO OBSERVE
1576
01:11:32,889 --> 01:11:36,090
PRIMITIVES LIKE
YOURSELF IN AN EFFORT TO
1577
01:11:36,092 --> 01:11:39,093
REFINE OUR
CULTURED WAY OF LIFE.
1578
01:11:39,095 --> 01:11:41,963
SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST
GIVE ME YOUR 25 BUCKS,
1579
01:11:41,965 --> 01:11:43,398
AND THEN YOU AND
YOUR PRIMATE FRIENDS
1580
01:11:43,400 --> 01:11:45,733
CAN GO IN AND BASH
EACH OTHER OVER THE HEAD.
1581
01:11:45,735 --> 01:11:46,768
COME ON.
1582
01:11:46,770 --> 01:11:49,003
YOU KNOW WHAT,
BITE ME.
1583
01:11:49,005 --> 01:11:51,839
OH, WELL,
LIVE LONG AND PRO-
1584
01:11:51,841 --> 01:11:54,342
OH WAIT, MY FINGERS
ARE FALLING ASLEEP,
1585
01:11:54,344 --> 01:11:55,877
EXCEPT FOR
THAT ONE.
1586
01:11:55,879 --> 01:11:57,712
OH.
1587
01:11:57,714 --> 01:12:00,581
GO DRILL A HOLE
IN THE WALL.
1588
01:12:00,583 --> 01:12:03,584
COME ON GIMBLEDORF,
LET'S GO, 25 BUCKS.
1589
01:12:03,586 --> 01:12:07,488
[Video game Gunshots]
1590
01:12:09,758 --> 01:12:11,793
I GUESS LLOYD
LEFT ALREADY, HUH?
1591
01:12:11,795 --> 01:12:14,028
YEAH, TELL SOMEBODY
WHO CARES.
1592
01:12:14,030 --> 01:12:16,264
OH SWEET, YOU ALREADY
PASSED LEVEL EIGHT.
1593
01:12:16,266 --> 01:12:17,999
IT WAS EASY,
I JUST USED THAT MAP
1594
01:12:18,001 --> 01:12:19,834
THAT LLOYD DOWNLOADED
OFF THE INTERNET.
1595
01:12:19,836 --> 01:12:22,770
OH, YEAH,
I REMEMBER THAT DAY.
1596
01:12:22,772 --> 01:12:24,272
THAT'S WHERE WE SPENT
THE WHOLE DAY LAUGHING
1597
01:12:24,274 --> 01:12:26,207
AND SHARING ABOUT OUR LONG
FORGED FRIENDSHIP, RIGHT?
1598
01:12:26,209 --> 01:12:28,543
THAT WAS A GOOD DAY,
INDEED, HUH?
1599
01:12:28,545 --> 01:12:30,011
IT WAS YESTERDAY.
1600
01:12:30,013 --> 01:12:32,046
[ ♪ ]
1601
01:12:32,048 --> 01:12:35,383
COME ON PATRICK,
WE NEED TO HELP HIM.
1602
01:12:35,385 --> 01:12:37,085
I MEAN, REMEMBER HOW
HE DIDN'T EVEN GET MAD
1603
01:12:37,087 --> 01:12:38,820
WHEN YOU SAID THAT
YOU BANGED HIM MOM?
1604
01:12:38,822 --> 01:12:39,887
FORGET IT!
1605
01:12:39,889 --> 01:12:41,389
HE BROKE THE BROS
BEFORE HOES CODE,
1606
01:12:41,391 --> 01:12:42,924
I'LL DIE BEFORE I'M EVER
GUILTY OF BREAKING THAT RULE!
1607
01:12:42,926 --> 01:12:44,625
YEAH, BY PUNISHING HIM
FOR THIS TRANSGRESSION,
1608
01:12:44,627 --> 01:12:46,861
ARE YOU NOT ALSO
BREAKING THAT RULE?
1609
01:12:46,863 --> 01:12:48,796
YOU'RE ALLOWING A
GIRL TO COME BETWIXT
1610
01:12:48,798 --> 01:12:52,367
HIM AND A FRIEND WHO'S
IN NEED OF OUR HELP.
1611
01:12:53,669 --> 01:12:54,669
WHAT THE FUCK?!
1612
01:12:54,671 --> 01:12:57,505
DUDE, ARE YOU ON
HIS SIDE OR MINE?
1613
01:12:57,507 --> 01:12:59,040
I'M ON OUR SIDE.
1614
01:12:59,042 --> 01:13:04,879
♪
1615
01:13:10,486 --> 01:13:12,353
I DON'T THINK
THEY'RE COMING.
1616
01:13:12,355 --> 01:13:14,055
WHAT ABOUT
CASSANDRA?
1617
01:13:14,057 --> 01:13:15,723
SHE SAID
SHE'D BE HERE.
1618
01:13:15,725 --> 01:13:17,091
I'LL WAIT
HERE FOR HER,
1619
01:13:17,093 --> 01:13:18,893
BUT YOU MUST GET TO
THE MARSHALLING AREA.
1620
01:13:18,895 --> 01:13:20,695
YOUR ARMY AWAITS
THEIR ORDERS.
1621
01:13:20,697 --> 01:13:22,797
ALRIGHT.
1622
01:13:22,799 --> 01:13:24,232
WISH ME LUCK.
1623
01:13:24,234 --> 01:13:28,236
MAY ULLR BLESS YOUR SWORD,
AND ODIN YOUR SHIELD.
1624
01:13:28,238 --> 01:13:30,605
♪
1625
01:13:30,607 --> 01:13:31,973
THANKS.
1626
01:13:31,975 --> 01:13:33,307
♪
1627
01:13:33,309 --> 01:13:36,144
I WAS BASICALLY
WISHING YOU LUCK.
1628
01:13:36,146 --> 01:13:40,548
ODIN,
FATHER OF THOR.
1629
01:13:40,550 --> 01:13:42,917
JESUS,
READ A FUCKING BOOK.
1630
01:13:42,919 --> 01:13:46,988
[ ♪ ]
1631
01:13:46,990 --> 01:13:53,694
♪
1632
01:13:53,696 --> 01:13:56,330
WHAT A
BEAUTIFUL SIGHT,
1633
01:13:56,332 --> 01:13:58,666
MY MINIONS HAVE GATHERED
FROM ACROSS THE LAND
1634
01:13:58,668 --> 01:14:01,002
TO COME AND
CRUSH MY FOES.
1635
01:14:01,004 --> 01:14:03,671
YOU SEEM MORE INTERESTED
IN GLORIFYING YOURSELF
1636
01:14:03,673 --> 01:14:06,641
THAN IN SERVING
THE BLOOD GODS.
1637
01:14:06,643 --> 01:14:10,344
YOU SEEM
LIKE A DICK.
1638
01:14:10,346 --> 01:14:13,047
MINIONS,
BEHOLD YOUR MASTER.
1639
01:14:13,049 --> 01:14:14,382
(Crowd Roars)
1640
01:14:14,384 --> 01:14:17,485
TODAY, WE WIPE THE
TAINT OF THE WHITE WIZARD
1641
01:14:17,487 --> 01:14:19,654
FROM THIS
LAND FOR GOOD.
1642
01:14:19,656 --> 01:14:22,256
THE ONE WHO
SLAYS HIS STUDENTS
1643
01:14:22,258 --> 01:14:25,460
WILL RECEIVE MY
PERSONAL BLESSING.
1644
01:14:25,462 --> 01:14:29,230
I SPIT ON THE TAINT
OF THE WHITE WIZARD.
1645
01:14:29,232 --> 01:14:31,966
- (Spits)
- (Crowd Roars)
1646
01:14:31,968 --> 01:14:35,903
♪
1647
01:14:39,541 --> 01:14:41,809
JORGEN,
LOOK WHO IT IS.
1648
01:14:41,811 --> 01:14:44,045
YOU GUYS READY
TO KICK SOME ASS?
1649
01:14:44,047 --> 01:14:45,680
(Laughing)
1650
01:14:45,682 --> 01:14:48,082
YOUR OPTIMISM
CAUSES MY LAUGHTER.
1651
01:14:48,084 --> 01:14:49,250
(Laughing)
1652
01:14:49,252 --> 01:14:51,419
YES, IT IS
VERY AMUSING.
1653
01:14:51,421 --> 01:14:52,820
WE ARE SURELY
OUTNUMBERED,
1654
01:14:52,822 --> 01:14:55,189
AND WILL RECEIVE
MANY MASSIVE WOUNDS.
1655
01:14:55,191 --> 01:14:58,593
OUR BLOG WILL OVERFLOW WITH
IMAGES OF GLORIOUS DEATH.
1656
01:14:58,595 --> 01:15:00,294
IT IS VERY
IMPRESSIVE.
1657
01:15:00,296 --> 01:15:01,529
WOULD YOU
LIKE THE URL?
1658
01:15:01,531 --> 01:15:03,231
MAYBE LATER.
1659
01:15:03,233 --> 01:15:06,000
NO, HERE I'LL WRITE IT ON YOUR
ARM NOW, SO YOU WON'T FORGET.
1660
01:15:06,002 --> 01:15:08,302
ANYHOW, I CAME UP
WITH A BATTLE PLAN,
1661
01:15:08,304 --> 01:15:11,639
SO IF EVERYBODY COULD
JUST GATHER AROUND,
1662
01:15:11,641 --> 01:15:13,007
WE CAN GO OVER IT.
1663
01:15:13,009 --> 01:15:14,509
EVERYONE JUST-
1664
01:15:14,511 --> 01:15:16,210
HE COMMANDS
NO RESPECT.
1665
01:15:16,212 --> 01:15:19,113
DAGMAR,
DOCUMENT HIS PAIN.
1666
01:15:21,149 --> 01:15:24,151
[ ♪ ]
1667
01:15:24,153 --> 01:15:25,586
YOU KNOW, I'VE SEEN
SOME BULLSHIT BEFORE,
1668
01:15:25,588 --> 01:15:27,255
BUT THIS
TAKES THE CAKE!
1669
01:15:27,257 --> 01:15:28,256
♪
1670
01:15:28,258 --> 01:15:31,559
FALL IN,
YOU FILTHY FUCK FACES!
1671
01:15:31,561 --> 01:15:33,794
THAT'S FUNNY, YOU KNOW,
BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I SAID
1672
01:15:33,796 --> 01:15:36,797
STAND THERE AND LOOK
LIKE IDIOTS, I SAID FALL IN,
1673
01:15:36,799 --> 01:15:39,300
BEFORE I TEAR OFF YOUR HEADS
AND CRAP DOWN YOUR THROATS!
1674
01:15:39,302 --> 01:15:40,902
COME ON,
COME ON, COME ON,
1675
01:15:40,904 --> 01:15:43,170
MY GRANDMOTHER MOVES FASTER
THAN YOU LIMP WRISTED FATTIES!
1676
01:15:43,172 --> 01:15:45,139
FALL IN, MAGGOTS,
AND LISTEN UP!
1677
01:15:45,141 --> 01:15:46,340
OK, YES.
1678
01:15:46,342 --> 01:15:47,875
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
1679
01:15:47,877 --> 01:15:49,877
Crowd:
YES!
1680
01:15:49,879 --> 01:15:51,445
THANKS GUYS, LISTEN,
I'M SORRY ABOUT--
1681
01:15:51,447 --> 01:15:55,383
HEY LLOYD, FRIENDSHIP MEANS
YOU DON'T NEED TO SAY SORRY.
1682
01:15:55,385 --> 01:15:58,219
THIS IS LLOYD,
THE HOLY PALADIN,
1683
01:15:58,221 --> 01:16:00,755
COMMANDER OF THE
FORCES OF LIGHT.
1684
01:16:00,757 --> 01:16:04,091
YOU WILL PAY VERY CLOSE
ATTENTION TO HIS INSTRUCTIONS,
1685
01:16:04,093 --> 01:16:06,260
AND YOU WILL FOLLOW
THEM TO THE TEE.
1686
01:16:06,262 --> 01:16:07,762
YOU GOT THAT?
1687
01:16:07,764 --> 01:16:09,463
Crowd:
YEAH! YES!
1688
01:16:09,465 --> 01:16:11,165
ALRIGHT.
1689
01:16:11,167 --> 01:16:14,969
OUR ENEMY THINKS HIS ADVANTAGE
IN NUMBERS IS HIS STRENGTH.
1690
01:16:14,971 --> 01:16:16,604
IT'S NOT.
1691
01:16:16,606 --> 01:16:19,106
WE SHALL TURN IT
INTO HIS WEAKNESS.
1692
01:16:19,108 --> 01:16:21,008
WE WILL LURE
HIM INTO OUR TRAP,
1693
01:16:21,010 --> 01:16:24,211
HIS OVERCONFIDENCE
THE SNARE,
1694
01:16:24,213 --> 01:16:26,480
AND WHEN WE HAVE HIM
RIGHT WHERE WE WANT HIM,
1695
01:16:26,482 --> 01:16:28,049
WE'LL GRAB
HIS BALLS.
1696
01:16:28,051 --> 01:16:29,483
WHAT?
1697
01:16:36,058 --> 01:16:37,592
AND THEN WE
RIP THEM OFF!
1698
01:16:37,594 --> 01:16:41,228
(Crowd Cheering)
1699
01:16:41,230 --> 01:16:45,333
EVERY GREAT LEADER MUST RIDE
TO BATTLE ON A WORTHY STEED.
1700
01:16:45,335 --> 01:16:46,734
WHAT?
1701
01:16:46,736 --> 01:16:48,269
♪
1702
01:16:48,271 --> 01:16:49,637
MOUNT HIM.
1703
01:16:49,639 --> 01:16:52,306
♪
1704
01:16:52,308 --> 01:16:54,175
HE NEEDS
TO BE INSIDE.
1705
01:16:54,177 --> 01:16:56,043
YEAH.
1706
01:16:56,045 --> 01:16:57,345
OUR LEADER.
1707
01:16:57,347 --> 01:17:00,548
♪
1708
01:17:00,550 --> 01:17:02,817
YOU LOOK
POWERFUL LLOYD.
1709
01:17:02,819 --> 01:17:04,885
YOU LOOK LIKE
SHAKIRA, OSWALD.
1710
01:17:04,887 --> 01:17:05,920
THANKS.
1711
01:17:05,922 --> 01:17:08,956
♪
1712
01:17:08,958 --> 01:17:12,860
SIR, I BEG YOU TO STAY OPEN
JUST A FEW MORE MOMENTS.
1713
01:17:12,862 --> 01:17:15,429
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
YOUR PRIMITIVE DIALECT.
1714
01:17:15,431 --> 01:17:16,998
COME ON,
MOVE ALONG.
1715
01:17:17,000 --> 01:17:18,332
PRIMITIVE?
1716
01:17:18,334 --> 01:17:21,802
YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT
I AM A LEVEL 80 WIZARD,
1717
01:17:21,804 --> 01:17:25,272
AND I WILL NOT TOLERATE
YOUR TROLL LIKE BEHAVIOR.
1718
01:17:25,274 --> 01:17:27,341
HEY, I SAID
MOVE ALONG BUDDY,
1719
01:17:27,343 --> 01:17:29,644
OR YOU'RE
GONNA GET CUT.
1720
01:17:29,646 --> 01:17:33,214
YOUR EMPTY THREATS DO NOT
PHASE THE WHITE WIZARD,
1721
01:17:33,216 --> 01:17:35,383
MY POINTY EARED
SPACE FRIEND.
1722
01:17:35,385 --> 01:17:38,653
OK, I WARNED YOU,
BACK OFF,
1723
01:17:38,655 --> 01:17:40,588
OR I'M GONNA HAVE TO
BREAK THE PRIME DIRECTIVE.
1724
01:17:40,590 --> 01:17:45,059
HAH, JUST LIKE A VULCAN TO
BRING A PHASER TO A MAGIC FIGHT.
1725
01:17:45,061 --> 01:17:46,060
♪
1726
01:17:46,062 --> 01:17:47,228
ANDY, WE'RE HERE.
1727
01:17:47,230 --> 01:17:48,796
WHERE ARE
THE PERVERTS?
1728
01:17:48,798 --> 01:17:50,231
UH, I DON'T MEAN TO INTERRUPT
WHATEVER'S GOING ON HERE,
1729
01:17:50,233 --> 01:17:51,666
BUT THEY NEED
TO REGISTER.
1730
01:17:51,668 --> 01:17:53,267
YEAH, FAT CHANCE.
1731
01:17:53,269 --> 01:17:55,169
YOUR GIANT
SPERM FRIEND HERE
1732
01:17:55,171 --> 01:17:57,371
WITH THE PURSE IS
THREATENING MY LIFE.
1733
01:17:57,373 --> 01:17:59,206
SIR, YOU PULLED
YOUR WEAPON FIRST.
1734
01:17:59,208 --> 01:18:00,608
OK, EVERYBODY
JUST CALM DOWN.
1735
01:18:00,610 --> 01:18:01,609
HEY BACK OFF.
1736
01:18:01,611 --> 01:18:02,610
HEY.
1737
01:18:02,612 --> 01:18:03,978
DO NOT POINT
THAT AT HER.
1738
01:18:03,980 --> 01:18:05,379
I SAID BACK OFF.
1739
01:18:05,381 --> 01:18:06,747
DON'T POINT IT
AT ME EITHER.
1740
01:18:06,749 --> 01:18:08,482
I'M POINTING IT,
AREN'T IT?
1741
01:18:08,484 --> 01:18:10,584
TESTICLES MEET
LIGHTNING BOLT.
1742
01:18:10,586 --> 01:18:12,353
AH!
1743
01:18:12,355 --> 01:18:13,654
AH!
1744
01:18:13,656 --> 01:18:14,622
ARCTIC BLAST.
1745
01:18:14,624 --> 01:18:16,390
AH! AH!
1746
01:18:16,392 --> 01:18:19,794
[ ♪ ]
1747
01:18:19,796 --> 01:18:29,336
♪
1748
01:18:29,338 --> 01:18:30,638
♪
1749
01:18:30,640 --> 01:18:34,175
BRING ME THE HEADS
OF THE MAN CREATURES!
1750
01:18:34,177 --> 01:18:35,342
CHARGE!
1751
01:18:35,344 --> 01:18:38,179
(Battle Cries)
1752
01:18:38,181 --> 01:18:47,521
♪
1753
01:18:47,523 --> 01:18:54,528
♪
1754
01:18:54,530 --> 01:18:58,599
♪
1755
01:18:58,601 --> 01:18:59,834
DOWN BOY.
1756
01:18:59,836 --> 01:19:09,043
♪
1757
01:19:09,045 --> 01:19:10,845
LET'S INTRODUCE THEM
TO THE HAMMER BROTHERS,
1758
01:19:10,847 --> 01:19:12,379
JACK AND SLEDGE.
1759
01:19:12,381 --> 01:19:15,583
(Battle Cries)
1760
01:19:15,585 --> 01:19:24,558
♪
1761
01:19:24,560 --> 01:19:33,801
♪
1762
01:19:33,803 --> 01:19:36,337
ARCHERS!
1763
01:19:36,339 --> 01:19:40,875
♪
1764
01:19:40,877 --> 01:19:42,309
PATHETIC.
1765
01:19:42,311 --> 01:19:44,712
GO AND SERVE
YOUR BLOOD GODS.
1766
01:19:44,714 --> 01:19:49,150
AAAAH!
1767
01:19:49,152 --> 01:19:54,755
♪
1768
01:19:54,757 --> 01:20:04,598
♪
1769
01:20:04,600 --> 01:20:14,608
♪
1770
01:20:14,610 --> 01:20:20,548
♪
1771
01:20:20,550 --> 01:20:21,849
(Archer Yells)
1772
01:20:21,851 --> 01:20:29,256
♪
1773
01:20:29,258 --> 01:20:31,125
(Leopold Roars)
1774
01:20:31,127 --> 01:20:34,628
♪
1775
01:20:34,630 --> 01:20:42,169
♪
1776
01:20:42,171 --> 01:20:45,206
DAGMAR, DOCUMENT
MY GLORIOUS DEATH.
1777
01:20:45,208 --> 01:20:47,341
AND MINE.
1778
01:20:47,343 --> 01:20:48,843
AAAH!
1779
01:20:48,845 --> 01:20:50,978
AH!
1780
01:20:50,980 --> 01:20:52,046
UGH!
1781
01:20:52,048 --> 01:20:55,850
♪
1782
01:20:55,852 --> 01:20:57,218
(Leopold Roars)
1783
01:20:57,220 --> 01:20:58,252
♪
1784
01:20:58,254 --> 01:21:00,588
Klaus:
THAT WASWONDERFUL.
1785
01:21:00,590 --> 01:21:03,023
OK, LOOK, ALL WE WANT TO DO
IS REGISTER FOR THE BATTLE,
1786
01:21:03,025 --> 01:21:04,291
PREFERABLY
BEFORE IT'S OVER.
1787
01:21:04,293 --> 01:21:06,260
YEAH, WELL BASED ON
WHAT I'M HEARING,
1788
01:21:06,262 --> 01:21:07,962
THAT'S JUST ABOUT TO
HAPPEN NOW, ISN'T IT?
1789
01:21:07,964 --> 01:21:09,964
OK, SO LET'S GET
THIS BALL ROLLING.
1790
01:21:09,966 --> 01:21:13,734
EXCUSE ME, REGISTRATION
DESK IS CLOSED.
1791
01:21:13,736 --> 01:21:15,336
DUDE, ALL YOU HAVE
TO DO IS OPEN THE BOOK
1792
01:21:15,338 --> 01:21:16,503
AND WRITE
DOWN OUR NAMES.
1793
01:21:16,505 --> 01:21:18,172
I MEAN,
WE'LL EVEN PAY EXTRA.
1794
01:21:18,174 --> 01:21:21,308
WAIT A MINUTE,
YOU TRYING TO BRIBE ME?
1795
01:21:21,310 --> 01:21:23,010
HOW ABOUT IF
WE SHOW SOME SKIN?
1796
01:21:23,012 --> 01:21:24,178
- WHAT?
- WHAT?
1797
01:21:24,180 --> 01:21:26,714
YOU REGISTER US,
AND WE FLASH YOU.
1798
01:21:26,716 --> 01:21:31,085
I AM FAR BEYOND THE TEMPTATIONS
OF THE FLESH, THERE AVATAR.
1799
01:21:31,087 --> 01:21:32,820
[Unzip]
1800
01:21:32,822 --> 01:21:35,489
SWEET FULTON POTATOES.
1801
01:21:37,225 --> 01:21:40,928
FOR A THOUSAND NIGHTS
I HAVE DREAMT OF THIS DAY.
1802
01:21:40,930 --> 01:21:43,163
MAKE'EM JIGGLE.
1803
01:21:43,165 --> 01:21:44,999
CAN WE
REGISTER NOW?
1804
01:21:45,001 --> 01:21:47,268
Vulcan:
YEAH, YEAH,
COME ON MOVE,
1805
01:21:47,270 --> 01:21:49,904
PUT YOUR MARK IN THE BOOK,GO, GO, GO, GO.
1806
01:21:53,642 --> 01:21:57,711
I KNOW THIS
MAY BE ILLOGICAL,
1807
01:21:57,713 --> 01:22:02,082
BUT WILL
YOU MARRY ME?
1808
01:22:02,084 --> 01:22:05,252
WE CAN START WITH
A VULCAN MIND MELD
1809
01:22:05,254 --> 01:22:07,221
AND WORK
OUR WAY DOWN.
1810
01:22:07,223 --> 01:22:10,791
[ ♪ ]
1811
01:22:10,793 --> 01:22:12,860
I CAN FEEL
YOUR PUSSY.
1812
01:22:20,001 --> 01:22:23,504
[Agent Danger Movie Theme Music]
1813
01:22:23,506 --> 01:22:29,710
♪
1814
01:22:29,712 --> 01:22:39,753
♪
1815
01:22:39,755 --> 01:22:44,758
♪
1816
01:22:44,760 --> 01:22:50,931
♪
1817
01:22:50,933 --> 01:22:52,633
I'M A MAN OF PEACE.
1818
01:22:52,635 --> 01:22:59,773
♪
1819
01:22:59,775 --> 01:23:09,750
♪
1820
01:23:09,752 --> 01:23:19,093
♪
1821
01:23:19,095 --> 01:23:21,295
YOU, LEAVE IN PIECES.
1822
01:23:21,297 --> 01:23:26,333
♪
1823
01:23:26,335 --> 01:23:29,069
(Whinnying)
1824
01:23:29,071 --> 01:23:31,505
WHAT DID I TELL YOU
ABOUT DOING COCAINE?
1825
01:23:31,507 --> 01:23:37,311
♪
1826
01:23:37,313 --> 01:23:40,848
I GUESS CASSANDRA WASN'T THE
ONLY TOUGH GUY ON THIS TEAM.
1827
01:23:40,850 --> 01:23:42,349
AH!
1828
01:23:42,351 --> 01:23:45,586
STAND BACK LLOYD, I'LL TAKE
CARE OF THIS KNUCKLEHEAD.
1829
01:23:45,588 --> 01:23:47,054
OSWALD, HE'S
GONNA KILL YOU.
1830
01:23:47,056 --> 01:23:48,122
WELL THEN
AVENGE ME.
1831
01:23:48,124 --> 01:23:51,125
NO, WAIT,
AVENGE ME FIRST.
1832
01:23:51,127 --> 01:23:52,626
♪
1833
01:23:52,628 --> 01:23:56,764
I'M A BERSERKER
BARBARIAN DWARF WARRIOR!
1834
01:23:56,766 --> 01:23:59,299
AH! AH! AH!
1835
01:23:59,301 --> 01:24:08,509
♪
1836
01:24:08,511 --> 01:24:09,977
OK.
1837
01:24:09,979 --> 01:24:11,378
PLEASE.
1838
01:24:11,380 --> 01:24:19,019
♪
1839
01:24:19,021 --> 01:24:20,587
WE'RE LARPING,
WE'RE HAVING FUN.
1840
01:24:20,589 --> 01:24:22,523
PLEASE. PLEASE.
1841
01:24:22,525 --> 01:24:23,524
AAAH!
1842
01:24:23,526 --> 01:24:26,293
♪
1843
01:24:26,295 --> 01:24:29,096
(Leopold Roars)
1844
01:24:29,098 --> 01:24:30,831
♪
1845
01:24:30,833 --> 01:24:32,466
REINFORCEMENTS!
1846
01:24:32,468 --> 01:24:34,835
♪
1847
01:24:34,837 --> 01:24:42,609
♪
1848
01:24:42,611 --> 01:24:44,044
(Ladies Yelling)
1849
01:24:44,046 --> 01:24:45,145
Ladies (Repeating):
PERVERT!
1850
01:24:45,147 --> 01:24:49,383
♪
1851
01:24:49,385 --> 01:24:51,752
Ladies (Repeating):
YOU PERVERT!
1852
01:24:51,754 --> 01:24:57,191
♪
1853
01:25:00,128 --> 01:25:02,262
[ ♪ ]
1854
01:25:02,264 --> 01:25:09,903
♪
1855
01:25:09,905 --> 01:25:19,880
♪
1856
01:25:19,882 --> 01:25:29,923
♪
1857
01:25:29,925 --> 01:25:39,933
♪
1858
01:25:39,935 --> 01:25:42,970
THIS IS THE SEXIEST
TOURNAMENT EVER.
1859
01:25:52,747 --> 01:25:55,883
(Whinnying)
1860
01:25:55,885 --> 01:25:58,819
[ ♪ ]
1861
01:25:58,821 --> 01:26:03,023
Derek:
I MUST ADMIT, YOU PUT ON
A SOMEWHAT BELIEVABLE SHOW.
1862
01:26:03,025 --> 01:26:04,424
JUST WAIT
FOR THE ENCORE.
1863
01:26:04,426 --> 01:26:05,893
WHY DON'T YOU
SAVE ME THE TIME,
1864
01:26:05,895 --> 01:26:09,263
GET ON YOUR KNEES IN
FRONT OF ME, AND SURRENDER.
1865
01:26:09,265 --> 01:26:11,465
I THINK YOU HAVE ME
CONFUSED WITH YOUR MOM.
1866
01:26:11,467 --> 01:26:13,834
OH THAT'S IT,
THAT IS IT.
1867
01:26:13,836 --> 01:26:15,302
CHARGE!
1868
01:26:15,304 --> 01:26:16,503
(Whinnying)
1869
01:26:16,505 --> 01:26:26,013
♪
1870
01:26:26,015 --> 01:26:34,955
♪
1871
01:26:34,957 --> 01:26:40,961
♪
1872
01:26:40,963 --> 01:26:42,629
HE'S LOSING.
1873
01:26:42,631 --> 01:26:45,499
Cassandra:
LLOYD, IF YOU WIN YOU CAN
FUCK STICK MY SUGAR BOWL.
1874
01:26:45,501 --> 01:26:46,800
AH!
1875
01:26:46,802 --> 01:26:53,373
♪
1876
01:26:53,375 --> 01:26:54,875
GET ME OUT
OF THIS THING.
1877
01:26:54,877 --> 01:26:59,146
♪
1878
01:26:59,148 --> 01:27:00,147
GIVE UP.
1879
01:27:00,149 --> 01:27:02,149
I COULD.
1880
01:27:02,151 --> 01:27:05,552
OR I COULD SIMPLY
VAPORIZE YOUR SWORD.
1881
01:27:05,554 --> 01:27:11,892
TAUM SAW, DE ECKET, FLESRUAR,CAFORG, SWORDUS, BE GONEUS.
1882
01:27:11,894 --> 01:27:13,927
♪
1883
01:27:13,929 --> 01:27:15,662
OH CRAP.
1884
01:27:15,664 --> 01:27:19,499
WELL THEN, DO YOU
HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY,
1885
01:27:19,501 --> 01:27:21,635
BEFORE I MELT YOUR
FACE WITH A SPELL
1886
01:27:21,637 --> 01:27:23,670
STRAIGHT FROM
THE DARK GODS.
1887
01:27:23,672 --> 01:27:28,275
WELL, AS A PALADIN,
I CAN CAST DIVINE EXORCISM,
1888
01:27:28,277 --> 01:27:30,177
BANISHING YOU TO
THE TWISTING NETHER.
1889
01:27:30,179 --> 01:27:33,146
YES, IN THEORY,
YOU COULD DO THAT,
1890
01:27:33,148 --> 01:27:35,515
BUT AT
YOUR LEVEL,
1891
01:27:35,517 --> 01:27:37,851
YOU WOULD NEED THE FABLED
ONE THOUSAND SIDED DIE
1892
01:27:37,853 --> 01:27:41,755
TO CAST A SPELL LIKE THAT
ON AN UNBELIEVABLY AWESOME
1893
01:27:41,757 --> 01:27:44,258
LEVEL 60 DARK MAGE,
AS MYSELF.
1894
01:27:44,260 --> 01:27:45,792
♪
1895
01:27:45,794 --> 01:27:49,129
YOU DON'T MEAN,
ONE OF THESE, DO YOU?
1896
01:27:49,131 --> 01:27:50,797
♪
1897
01:27:50,799 --> 01:27:52,833
IT CAN'T BE.
1898
01:27:52,835 --> 01:27:54,334
WHAT IS IT?
1899
01:27:54,336 --> 01:27:57,371
THE THOUSAND SIDED DIE IS
A RARE AND POWERFUL ITEM,
1900
01:27:57,373 --> 01:28:00,140
HELD BY ONLY THE MOSTDEDICATED LARPERS,
1901
01:28:00,142 --> 01:28:03,510
WHO EVEN DARE TO PERFORMSUCH A POWERFUL SPELL.
1902
01:28:03,512 --> 01:28:07,147
WITH IT, THERE IS ONLY A
ONE IN ONE THOUSAND CHANCE
1903
01:28:07,149 --> 01:28:09,916
THAT LLOYD
CAN LOSE.
1904
01:28:09,918 --> 01:28:16,923
LACTATUS, INTOLERAS, PESNERIS,MAXITOSIS MATCHUS LEAKUS.
1905
01:28:16,925 --> 01:28:18,558
HA!
1906
01:28:18,560 --> 01:28:21,395
♪
1907
01:28:21,397 --> 01:28:24,431
A CRITICAL MISS.
1908
01:28:24,433 --> 01:28:25,799
DAMN!
1909
01:28:25,801 --> 01:28:27,601
(Indiscernible Swearing)
1910
01:28:27,603 --> 01:28:30,504
THAT WAS THE ONE IN
ONE THOUSAND CHANCE.
1911
01:28:30,506 --> 01:28:31,805
♪
1912
01:28:31,807 --> 01:28:35,542
THE GODS OF FATE HAVE
PRE-ORDAINED MY WIN,
1913
01:28:35,544 --> 01:28:37,511
AND YOUR LOSS.
1914
01:28:37,513 --> 01:28:41,415
YOU KNOW WHAT,
ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT.
1915
01:28:41,417 --> 01:28:43,650
RIGHT NOW,
RIGHT HERE, YOU AND ME,
1916
01:28:43,652 --> 01:28:46,186
NO SPELLS,
NO TRICKS.
1917
01:28:46,188 --> 01:28:50,857
SILENCE, I HAVE TO
DECIDE WHAT TYPE OF SPELL
1918
01:28:50,859 --> 01:28:54,695
WOULD BE MOST HUMILIATING
TO END THIS BATTLE.
1919
01:28:54,697 --> 01:28:57,931
SHALL I TURN YOU
INTO A BUTTERCUP,
1920
01:28:57,933 --> 01:29:03,403
OR PERHAPS A HORRIBLE KITTEN
WITH LITTLE ROTTEN TEETH?
1921
01:29:03,405 --> 01:29:04,604
YOU SCARED?
1922
01:29:04,606 --> 01:29:05,872
WHAT?
1923
01:29:05,874 --> 01:29:08,608
ARE YOU SCARED TO
FIGHT ME MAN TO MAN?
1924
01:29:08,610 --> 01:29:10,944
IF YOU WIN BY CASTING
SOME FRUITY SPELL,
1925
01:29:10,946 --> 01:29:14,815
IT WILL BE A HALLOW VICTORY
BECAUSE EVERYBODY HERE KNOWS
1926
01:29:14,817 --> 01:29:17,017
IT'S BECAUSE
YOU WERE SCARED.
1927
01:29:17,019 --> 01:29:21,621
YOUR ATTEMPT TO BAIT ME
INTO SOME TYPE OF NEEDLESS
1928
01:29:21,623 --> 01:29:26,460
PHYSICAL PROWESS
COMBAT TEST, IT'S FUTILE.
1929
01:29:26,462 --> 01:29:29,796
IT'S GOOD, I'M GLAD THEN,
BECAUSE, WELL I HAD PATRICK
1930
01:29:29,798 --> 01:29:31,398
BREAK INTO YOUR
PLACE LAST NIGHT,
1931
01:29:31,400 --> 01:29:36,670
AND TAKE A SHIT ON YOUR COPY
OF PRINCE FINNTOR, NUMBER ONE.
1932
01:29:36,672 --> 01:29:37,971
YOU LIAR.
1933
01:29:37,973 --> 01:29:39,339
YOU LIAR!
1934
01:29:39,341 --> 01:29:49,049
♪
1935
01:29:49,051 --> 01:29:51,084
THE STUDENT HAS
BECOME THE MASTER.
1936
01:29:51,086 --> 01:29:53,420
♪
1937
01:29:53,422 --> 01:29:57,057
BLOOD GODS,
WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!
1938
01:29:57,059 --> 01:30:01,928
WELL, I GUESS
THE GOOD GUYS WIN.
1939
01:30:01,930 --> 01:30:04,464
Lloyd:
I HAVE NEVER WORKEDSO HARD TO PASS A CLASS.
1940
01:30:04,466 --> 01:30:05,465
LLOYD, WATCH OUT!
1941
01:30:05,467 --> 01:30:06,500
WHA!
1942
01:30:06,502 --> 01:30:07,501
LIGHTNING BOLT.
1943
01:30:07,503 --> 01:30:12,105
AH! AH, IT BURNS.
1944
01:30:12,107 --> 01:30:14,875
IT BURNS LIKE, AH!
1945
01:30:14,877 --> 01:30:19,346
IT BURNS MY
EYES LIKE- LIKE PISS!
1946
01:30:19,348 --> 01:30:22,716
AAAH!
1947
01:30:22,718 --> 01:30:27,754
♪
1948
01:30:27,756 --> 01:30:30,957
I SWORE I'D NEVER USE
MY MAGIC IN ANGER AGAIN.
1949
01:30:30,959 --> 01:30:33,460
I DON'T THINK ONE
RELAPSE IS THAT BAD.
1950
01:30:33,462 --> 01:30:35,829
Patrick:
YOU GUYS SHOULD HAVE SEEN WHAT
THOSE CHICKS DID TO LEOPOLD.
1951
01:30:35,831 --> 01:30:37,731
Oswald:
YEAH, THEY KEPT CALLING HIM
A PERVERT AS THEY BEAT HIM,
1952
01:30:37,733 --> 01:30:38,799
AND I COULDN'T
TAKE IT ANYMORE,
1953
01:30:38,801 --> 01:30:40,000
I HAD TOSTOP WATCHING.
1954
01:30:40,002 --> 01:30:41,301
YOU DID IT.
1955
01:30:41,303 --> 01:30:42,602
WELL, YOU HELPED
A LITTLE.
1956
01:30:42,604 --> 01:30:45,005
HEY, WHERE
DID DEREK GO?
1957
01:30:45,007 --> 01:30:49,709
OH, HE RAN OFF INTO THE WOODS
AFTER ANDY MELTED HIS FACE.
1958
01:30:49,711 --> 01:30:53,547
Oswald:
SO THOSE COOL GNOMES ARE TALKING
ABOUT GETTING SOME PIZZA.
1959
01:30:53,549 --> 01:30:58,151
I'M BUYING, BUT DON'T LET THAT
UNICORN SHIT IN MY SISTER'S VAN.
1960
01:30:59,754 --> 01:31:03,056
[ ♪ ]
1961
01:31:03,058 --> 01:31:09,729
♪
1962
01:31:09,731 --> 01:31:14,634
(Applause)
1963
01:31:17,705 --> 01:31:19,873
Patrick:
MAKE SURE TO ESTABLISHTHAT YOU'RE THE ONE IN CHARGE.
1964
01:31:19,875 --> 01:31:21,675
IF YOU LET HER TAKE CONTROL,
IT'S GONNA RUIN YOUR LIFE.
1965
01:31:21,677 --> 01:31:23,210
I THINK THEY'LL
BE FINE, PATRICK.
1966
01:31:23,212 --> 01:31:26,880
LLOYD, THE KEY TO A GOOD
RELATIONSHIP IS COMPROMISE.
1967
01:31:26,882 --> 01:31:29,549
OH, AND DON'T FORGET
TO SIGN A SEX CONTRACT.
1968
01:31:29,551 --> 01:31:30,884
I'LL KEEP
THAT IN MIND.
1969
01:31:30,886 --> 01:31:32,853
WHAT THE HELL'S
A SEX CONTRACT?
1970
01:31:32,855 --> 01:31:34,254
HOW DO YOU THINK ME AND
MY INTERNET GIRLFRIEND
1971
01:31:34,256 --> 01:31:35,922
HAVE BEEN
TOGETHER FOR SO LONG?
1972
01:31:35,924 --> 01:31:38,792
I'M NEVER USING
YOUR KEYBOARD AGAIN.
1973
01:31:38,794 --> 01:31:39,960
READY TO GO?
1974
01:31:39,962 --> 01:31:41,127
- ARE YOU?
- MM-HMM.
1975
01:31:41,129 --> 01:31:46,967
♪
1976
01:31:46,969 --> 01:31:48,101
ALRIGHT OSWALD,
TAKE CARE OF THIS ONE FOR ME.
1977
01:31:48,103 --> 01:31:49,669
- WILL DO.
- PEACE OUT BOYS.
1978
01:31:49,671 --> 01:31:51,004
Oswald:
BYE CASSANDRA.
1979
01:31:51,006 --> 01:31:52,372
HEY, MAKE SURE TO
BE BACK AT 8:00,
1980
01:31:52,374 --> 01:31:55,809
WE GOT THAT NEW AGENT DANGER
MOVIE ON PAY PER VIEW.
1981
01:31:55,811 --> 01:32:00,146
♪
1982
01:32:00,148 --> 01:32:04,251
Andy:
AND THUS GOES THE TALEOF LLOYD THE CONQUEROR.
1983
01:32:04,253 --> 01:32:07,020
EVERYTHING IN OURWORLD WAS SET BACK
1984
01:32:07,022 --> 01:32:09,356
THE WAY IT WASSUPPOSED TO BE.
1985
01:32:09,358 --> 01:32:12,792
THROUGH HARD FOUGHT BATTLES,AND THE BRAVERY OF THE PEOPLE,
1986
01:32:12,794 --> 01:32:16,329
OUR LARPING LEAGUE HADFOUND ITS BALANCE AGAIN.
1987
01:32:16,331 --> 01:32:18,398
♪
1988
01:32:18,400 --> 01:32:23,003
FUN REPLACED FEAR,TEAMWORK REPLACED TREACHERY.
1989
01:32:23,005 --> 01:32:27,374
THE FORESTS AND PLAYGROUNDSREVERBERATED WITH THE WHISPERS
1990
01:32:27,376 --> 01:32:31,878
AND WONDER OF MAGICAND OVERALL GOOD TIMES.
1991
01:32:31,880 --> 01:32:34,714
IT WAS LIKE ALLTHE SECRETS OF THE LARP
1992
01:32:34,716 --> 01:32:36,983
HAD SOMEHOWREMAINED PURE,
1993
01:32:36,985 --> 01:32:40,687
AND WERE ABLE TO SHOW THEMSELVES
THROUGH US, ONCE AGAIN.
1994
01:32:40,689 --> 01:32:43,924
THAT IS, UNTIL THESHADOWS GROW STRONG,
1995
01:32:43,926 --> 01:32:48,962
AND RISE TO CHALLENGE THEFORCES OF LIGHT, ONCE AGAIN.
1996
01:32:48,964 --> 01:32:50,997
TO DO SO, ONEWOULD NEED AN OBJECT
1997
01:32:50,999 --> 01:32:52,832
OF GREAT ANDTERRIBLE MAGIC,
1998
01:32:52,834 --> 01:32:57,103
WHOSE PRICE WOULD BEONE'S SOUL AND SANITY.
1999
01:32:57,105 --> 01:32:59,806
NO ONE WOULD DARE.
2000
01:32:59,808 --> 01:33:03,944
AND SO IT
IS WRITTEN, BY ME.
2001
01:33:03,946 --> 01:33:07,047
ANYWAY, I'M OLD,
AND I RAMBLE.
2002
01:33:07,049 --> 01:33:08,848
SO DO YOU WANT TO BUY
A COPY OF MY NEW BOOK?
2003
01:33:08,850 --> 01:33:12,385
I DON'T KNOW, YOU JUST
TOLD ME THE WHOLE THING.
2004
01:33:12,387 --> 01:33:15,388
WHAT IF
I SIGNED IT?
2005
01:33:15,390 --> 01:33:17,424
LOOK, I'D REALLY JUST LIKE TO
SIGN UP FOR DEMONS AND DWARVES,
2006
01:33:17,426 --> 01:33:19,726
AND GET OUT OF HERE.
2007
01:33:19,728 --> 01:33:24,264
OK, THE REGISTRATION
FEE IS $50,
2008
01:33:24,266 --> 01:33:25,732
BUT I MUST
WARN YOU,
2009
01:33:25,734 --> 01:33:27,567
♪
2010
01:33:27,569 --> 01:33:30,337
IT'S UH,
NON-REFUNDABLE.
2011
01:33:30,339 --> 01:33:36,276
♪
2012
01:33:40,748 --> 01:33:43,083
[ ♪ ]
2013
01:33:43,085 --> 01:33:50,423
♪
2014
01:33:50,425 --> 01:34:00,433
♪
2015
01:34:00,435 --> 01:34:10,443
♪
2016
01:34:10,445 --> 01:34:20,420
♪
2017
01:34:20,422 --> 01:34:30,463
♪
2018
01:34:30,465 --> 01:34:40,473
♪
2019
01:34:40,475 --> 01:34:50,483
♪
2020
01:34:50,485 --> 01:34:59,859
♪
2021
01:34:59,861 --> 01:35:01,995
I MUST
ALSO WARN YOU,
2022
01:35:01,997 --> 01:35:04,798
DON'T FEED THE
UNICORN TACOS.
2023
01:35:04,800 --> 01:35:06,833
♪
2024
01:35:06,835 --> 01:35:07,834
Klaus:
FOR GLORY.
2025
01:35:07,836 --> 01:35:10,370
Klaus:
OH YES,
YES, GOOD
2026
01:35:10,372 --> 01:35:11,371
JORGEN.
2027
01:35:11,373 --> 01:35:12,872
OOOHH HA HA.
2028
01:35:12,874 --> 01:35:15,875
♪
2029
01:35:15,877 --> 01:35:17,610
OH, YOU CAN DO
MORE THAN THAT.
2030
01:35:17,612 --> 01:35:19,145
COME ON, LET'S
SEE WHAT YOU GOT.
2031
01:35:19,147 --> 01:35:21,247
OH!
2032
01:35:21,249 --> 01:35:23,183
OH, THAT WAS GOOD,
ACTUALLY.
2033
01:35:23,185 --> 01:35:24,250
HIYA!
2034
01:35:24,252 --> 01:35:26,186
OH, YOU GOT
ME UNAWARE.
2035
01:35:26,188 --> 01:35:30,523
♪
2036
01:35:30,525 --> 01:35:36,563
♪
2037
01:35:36,565 --> 01:35:39,499
(Evil Laughter)
2038
01:35:39,501 --> 01:35:47,173
(Evil Laughter
Continues)
2039
01:35:47,175 --> 01:35:55,548
♪
2040
01:35:55,550 --> 01:36:00,553
♪
2041
01:36:00,555 --> 01:36:10,563
♪
2042
01:36:10,565 --> 01:36:20,540
♪
2043
01:36:20,542 --> 01:36:30,583
♪
2044
01:36:30,585 --> 01:36:40,593
♪
2045
01:36:40,595 --> 01:36:50,603
♪
2046
01:36:50,605 --> 01:37:00,580
♪
2047
01:37:00,582 --> 01:37:10,590
♪
2048
01:37:10,592 --> 01:37:20,633
♪
2049
01:37:20,635 --> 01:37:30,643
♪
2050
01:37:30,645 --> 01:37:40,620
♪
2051
01:37:40,622 --> 01:37:50,630
♪
2052
01:37:50,632 --> 01:37:54,634
♪
142195
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.