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1
00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:32,560
By Jove!
2
00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:33,920
It's warm tonight,
isn't it, Fawlty?
3
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:35,120
Certainly is,
Major, yes.
4
00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:36,640
Very warm.
5
00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:37,720
Can I get you another one?
6
00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:39,680
What?
Well, why not indeed?
7
00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:41,432
What a very nice idea.
8
00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:45,640
Reminds me of somebody
machine gunning a seal.
9
00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:46,720
The heat?
10
00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:48,040
No, no.
My wife's laugh.
11
00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:50,600
Ah, yes.
12
00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:52,160
Ah, good evening,
Mrs. Peignoir.
13
00:00:52,160 --> 00:00:53,800
Good evening.
14
00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:56,240
Thank you for your map.
It was so useful.
15
00:00:56,240 --> 00:00:58,600
I must congratulate you.
16
00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:01,840
I had no idea
how charming Torquay was.
17
00:01:01,840 --> 00:01:02,960
Enchant�. May I ask,
18
00:01:02,960 --> 00:01:04,800
did you find anything
of interest?
19
00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:07,400
Mm-hmm. A few pieces
I like very much.
20
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,680
And one, oh...
I had to have it.
21
00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:12,640
Formidable.
I'm so pleased.
22
00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,960
May I introduce
Major Gowen,
23
00:01:14,960 --> 00:01:17,040
our longest standing resident?
Mrs. Peignoir.
24
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:18,400
How do you do,
Major?
25
00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:19,800
How do you do,
Madam?
26
00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:21,280
Mrs. Peignoir's
an antique dealer.
27
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:23,748
She's down here for a few days
sniffing around for dainty relics.
28
00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:27,880
Please don't
alarm yourself,
29
00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:29,320
it's only my wife
laughing.
30
00:01:29,320 --> 00:01:31,600
I'm afraid her local
finishing school was bombed.
31
00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:32,640
Oh, dear!
32
00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:34,360
No, no, not really.
Just a thought.
33
00:01:34,360 --> 00:01:35,800
Well now,
what can I get you?
34
00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:37,440
Do you have any Ricard?
35
00:01:37,440 --> 00:01:38,480
I'm sorry?
36
00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:39,640
Any Ricard?
37
00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:41,880
We're just out of it, I think.
38
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,080
- Just a sherry then.
- But of course.
39
00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:46,720
Tell me, are you,
by any chance,
40
00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,040
French at all?
41
00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:49,680
Yes, I am.
42
00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:51,511
Good Lord!
43
00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:56,160
Enjoying yourself, dear?
44
00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:58,760
We, uh... we haven't put
any nuts in the bowl, have we?
45
00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:00,520
I haven't.
I don't know about you.
46
00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:01,840
Well, I'll do it then,
shall I?
47
00:02:01,840 --> 00:02:03,760
That would be
the simplest solution, dear.
48
00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:05,040
Where's Manuel?
49
00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:07,920
We've given him the evening off, dear.
It's his birthday.
50
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:10,559
I mean, how old is he?
Two and a half?
51
00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,840
Excuse me, there are
no nuts here, Sybil.
52
00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:18,637
No nuts!
53
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:21,960
You'll find them
in the kitchen.
54
00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:23,120
Oh, will I?
55
00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:26,320
If you can bear to tear yourself away
from Mrs. Peignoir, you will.
56
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:27,753
Do go on.
57
00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:32,120
In 1918, I think.
58
00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:34,600
Did you ever see that film,
"How to Murder your Wife"?
59
00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:36,120
"How to Murder
Your Wife"?
60
00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:38,560
Yes, awfully good.
I saw it six times.
61
00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:40,039
Very funny!
62
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:44,560
Are you all right,
Mr. Fawlty?
63
00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:46,680
What? Yes, thank you
very much. You all right?
64
00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:47,800
Yes.
65
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:49,320
Good, good.
We're all all right, then.
66
00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:52,320
Must be the heat.
67
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:54,240
Yes, and he's getting taller,
isn't he?
68
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:55,960
I don't think
he's very well, dear.
69
00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:58,400
I think we ought
to take care of him.
70
00:02:58,400 --> 00:02:59,400
- Hello.
- Hello.
71
00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:01,480
I think I left it
over here somewhere.
72
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:02,993
Hang on.
73
00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:06,840
Ah, here it is.
74
00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:08,240
See you tonight?
75
00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:09,593
Mm-hmm.
C'mon.
76
00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:17,920
Yes!
A single for tonight, is it?
77
00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:20,160
Mr. Fawlty, may I introduce
Richard Turner?
78
00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:22,360
- I'm sorry?
- He's a friend of mine.
79
00:03:22,360 --> 00:03:23,720
Oh!
You know each other, do you?
80
00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:25,120
Just passing through,
are you?
81
00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:26,520
There you go.
See you tonight.
82
00:03:26,520 --> 00:03:29,440
Oh, we've opened a library, have we?
How nice.
83
00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,680
Please don't leave
on my account, Mr. Turnip.
84
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:33,440
- I'm sorry, Mr. Fawlty.
- Now look, Polly.
85
00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:35,560
- We were just saying goodbye...
- I mean what sort of place
86
00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:39,840
do you think this is, a massage parlor?
We are running a nice respectable high cl...
87
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,840
I'm sorry, did I say
something funny?
88
00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:43,400
No, I was, uh,
just looking...
89
00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,400
No, obviously I said
something frightfully comic.
90
00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:46,440
No, it's just the heat.
91
00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:49,360
Well, so long as I amuse the staff.
That's all I'm here for.
92
00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:51,760
- I'll just take these in...
- One other thing, Polly.
93
00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:54,560
I'm afraid we've abandoned the idea
of the topless afternoon teas,
94
00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:57,840
so if you wouldn't mind changing
before going where people may be trying to eat.
95
00:03:57,840 --> 00:03:59,520
I was going to.
96
00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:01,200
Polly, would you
come back here, please?
97
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:02,920
I'm on form tonight.
Yes, Mr. Fawlty?
98
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:05,760
I know these kind of drawings
are considered decent at art school.
99
00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:08,600
Would you please not leave them lying around
on display at the reception?
100
00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:11,160
I'll put them away
when I've got some clothes on.
101
00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:12,559
I mean, really!
102
00:04:20,880 --> 00:04:22,313
Hello, Fawlty Titties.
103
00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:26,200
Yes, yes.
104
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,040
Oh, it's you, Audrey. Yes.
105
00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:30,640
Oh, he's left you again,
has he?
106
00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:33,080
Oh, dear... oh, dear.
107
00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,640
How sad, hmm... yes.
108
00:04:35,640 --> 00:04:38,040
Ah, good evening, Major.
I'll be with you in just one moment.
109
00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:39,800
Well, I'll get her to call.
110
00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:41,960
Hmm... yes, well,
keep your pecker up. Bye.
111
00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:43,439
Dreadful.
112
00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:46,840
Oh, stop it, Alan.
113
00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:48,068
R-ruff, ruff-ruff!
114
00:04:51,080 --> 00:04:53,000
Hello.
115
00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:54,560
We booked a room.
116
00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:56,320
- Have you?
- Yes, a double one.
117
00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:58,720
- The name is...
- One moment, please.
118
00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:00,360
- That's a nice suit.
- What?
119
00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:02,600
- Nothing.
- I thought you said something
120
00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:03,880
No.
121
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:05,480
Are you all right?
122
00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:07,835
Yes, thank you.
Aah!
123
00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:12,080
- Are we ready?
- I think we are, yes.
124
00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:13,920
May I have your name, please?
125
00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:15,240
Yes, it's Bruce.
126
00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:16,640
- Mr. And Mrs. Bruce.
- That's right.
127
00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:18,200
Is it a double bed?
128
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:19,440
I beg your pardon?
129
00:05:19,440 --> 00:05:21,440
Has our room
got a double bed?
130
00:05:21,440 --> 00:05:23,640
- A double bed?
- Yes.
131
00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:26,080
We've only got one double bed,
I mean, do you want that?
132
00:05:26,080 --> 00:05:27,280
Oh, very much indeed.
Yes.
133
00:05:27,280 --> 00:05:29,240
Well, I'll have to put you
in number 12 then.
134
00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:31,760
- All right.
- I mean... oh, never mind.
135
00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:33,273
Has it got a breeze?
136
00:05:34,280 --> 00:05:36,920
Has it got a breeze?
137
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:38,720
Well, is it airy?
138
00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:40,600
Well, there's air in it.
I mean, what the...
139
00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:42,160
Oh, I think there's
a letter for me.
140
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:44,480
- What?
- There's a letter for me there.
141
00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:47,392
- No, there isn't.
- Yes. Jean Wilson.
142
00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:50,840
- Jean Wilson, is this you?
- Mm-hmm.
143
00:05:50,840 --> 00:05:51,840
Heh heh heh!
144
00:05:51,840 --> 00:05:53,400
Now, what's going on here?
145
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,040
Well, I can't give you
a double room, then.
146
00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:57,560
- Oh, look...
- It's against the law.
147
00:05:57,560 --> 00:05:58,800
- What law?
- The law of England.
148
00:05:58,800 --> 00:05:59,840
Nothing to do with me.
149
00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:02,040
- Nothing to do with you?
- Nothing at all.
150
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:03,840
I can give you two singles,
if you like, but...
151
00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:05,840
Shall we go
somewhere else?
152
00:06:05,840 --> 00:06:07,640
Excuse me.
153
00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:09,560
There's my key.
154
00:06:09,560 --> 00:06:11,640
And now, I'm off
to paint the town red.
155
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:13,040
Thank you so much.
156
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,360
Well, uh... perhaps I'll
see you later this evening?
157
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:17,828
Yes, my wife and I will be up
till quite late tonight, thank you.
158
00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:20,680
I don't believe a word!
159
00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:22,960
Excuse me.
We'll have two singles then,
160
00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:24,800
if that's all right
with the police?
161
00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:26,840
Two singles, certainly.
Now...
162
00:06:26,840 --> 00:06:29,280
- Next to each other.
- Next to each other...
163
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:31,680
Oh dear, we can't do that.
What a shame.
164
00:06:31,680 --> 00:06:33,320
- Good evening.
- Good evening.
165
00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:35,640
- A double, is it?
- We'd like a double.
166
00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:38,360
Two singles, dear.
Not married. Now...
167
00:06:38,360 --> 00:06:39,640
What?
168
00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:41,080
Nothing, dear.
I'm dealing with it.
169
00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:44,440
Well, 17 and 18 are free.
You'd have to share a bath.
170
00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:47,200
No... Oh, uh, Audrey called.
I'll handle it.
171
00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:48,400
George has left her again.
172
00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:49,400
Oh, no.
173
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:51,880
Now, we've got one on the first floor,
one right up at the top.
174
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:55,000
- Shall I deal with this, Basil?
- I'm dealing with it, dear.
175
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:56,840
No, that's all right.
You wanted two singles?
176
00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:58,080
I said
I'd deal with it.
177
00:06:58,080 --> 00:06:59,840
- Mind sharing a bathroom?
- I was here first.
178
00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:01,671
It's my turn now.
179
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:06,035
I fought the Korean war, you know?
I killed four men.
180
00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:11,600
He was in the Catering Corps,
he used to poison them.
181
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,080
Yes?
Who is it?
182
00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:18,720
- It's Manuel.
- What do you want?
183
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:20,480
Can I go now?
184
00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:21,840
I thought you'd gone.
185
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:24,040
- �Qu�?
- I thought you'd gone.
186
00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:25,760
No, I turned it off.
187
00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:27,280
What?
188
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,040
It was about so high.
189
00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:32,280
No. I said, I thought... a creduto...It doesn't matter.
190
00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:34,040
- �Qu�?
- It doesn't matter.
191
00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:35,480
Oh, you think
I gone.
192
00:07:35,480 --> 00:07:37,320
- Yes.
- No, no, I go now.
193
00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:38,840
- Wonderful.
- What? Is okay?
194
00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:41,229
- It's okay.
- Thank you.
195
00:07:42,640 --> 00:07:43,640
Yes?
196
00:07:43,640 --> 00:07:45,760
- Before I go...
- What is it?
197
00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:47,800
Is my birthday.
198
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,760
Yes, I know!
199
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,960
"I want to thank you
for beautiful present."
200
00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,320
Oh, yes. Fine.
201
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,480
"And for your much kindness
to me since I come here."
202
00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:56,760
Not at all.
My pleasure.
203
00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:59,240
"Since coming here from Spain,
leaving my mother..."
204
00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:01,440
- Outside.
- �Qu�?
205
00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:03,908
Outside. Thank you.
206
00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:06,560
"Since coming here
from Spain,
207
00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:08,920
leaving my five brothers
and four sisters..."
208
00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:11,798
Give it to me.
Thank you.
209
00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:14,960
Can I have it,
Basil?
210
00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:16,200
- What, dear?
- I want that key.
211
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:17,640
I've only got the key
to room 12, dear.
212
00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:18,880
- That's the one.
- Now look here, Sybil...
213
00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:20,960
Basil!
214
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:22,680
If you were my size...
215
00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:24,238
"Since coming..."
216
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:26,920
- Manuel.
- S�, s�?
217
00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:28,760
Number 12, please.
218
00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:29,875
Basil!
219
00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:36,160
Jean!
220
00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:37,880
Hello, Poll.
221
00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:39,440
What are you
doing here?
222
00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:41,200
Well, we couldn't get
in at the Bellevue.
223
00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:43,120
Oh, no.
Hello, Alan.
224
00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:45,240
It'll be fun.
My parents arrive tomorrow.
225
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:46,440
What, here?
226
00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:47,840
Well, I warned you.
227
00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:49,240
Yes, we've already met
the famous Fawlty.
228
00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,320
Shh, I'm not supposed
to hobnob.
229
00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:53,788
- I like your outfit.
- I'll give you the pattern.
230
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,240
Are you going to be
at Fiona's wedding?
231
00:08:58,240 --> 00:09:00,480
I can't, but I'll
be at the reception,
232
00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:02,240
in my very own
Jean Wilson creation.
233
00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:03,760
I want you
to try that on later.
234
00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:05,840
Okay. How's that
gorgeous stepfather?
235
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,160
I haven't seen him for a month.
He's been in Singapore.
236
00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:09,560
Oh, blast!
237
00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,960
I forgot to get those batteries
for my electric razor.
238
00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:13,400
Is there anywhere
still open, Poll?
239
00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:16,312
- You might find a chemist's.
- I better have a look.
240
00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:18,680
Is Richard
coming tonight?
241
00:09:18,680 --> 00:09:20,671
- We'll be along about 10:00.
- Great!
242
00:09:25,680 --> 00:09:27,040
Hello again.
243
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:30,160
We managed to get it
all sorted out with your wife.
244
00:09:30,160 --> 00:09:32,360
I wouldn't know about that.
Is there something you want?
245
00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,510
Yes. I know it's a bit late,
do you know if there's a chemist still open?
246
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:37,720
I beg your pardon?
247
00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:40,400
Do you know if there's
a chemist still open?
248
00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:43,080
I suppose you think
this is funny, do you?
249
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:45,360
- Funny?
- Ha. Ha. Ha.
250
00:09:45,360 --> 00:09:48,160
No, no. I really
want to know.
251
00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:50,800
Well, I don't. So far as I know,
all the chemists are shut.
252
00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,040
You'll just have to wait
till tomorrow. Sorry.
253
00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:55,600
Bit of a blow,
I imagine.
254
00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:56,600
What?
255
00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:57,840
Nothing. You heard.
256
00:09:57,840 --> 00:09:59,240
Is that all?
257
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:00,840
- Well...
- Yes?
258
00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:03,720
- I don't suppose you've got a couple...
- Now, look!
259
00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:05,240
Just don't
push your luck!
260
00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:06,840
I have a breaking point,
you know.
261
00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:09,434
Well, I only want
some batteries.
262
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,560
I don't believe it.
263
00:10:12,560 --> 00:10:14,560
- What?
- Batteries, huh?
264
00:10:14,560 --> 00:10:16,920
You know something?
You disgust me.
265
00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:19,040
I know what people
like you get up to,
266
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:20,920
and I think
it's disgusting!
267
00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:22,280
Wh-what are you
talking about?
268
00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:25,040
I want batteries for my electric razor.
I want to shave!
269
00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:26,080
- Oh yes?
- Yes!
270
00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:27,800
I haven't shaved today.
Look, see?
271
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:29,280
- Electric razor, huh?
- Right!
272
00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:32,440
Well, that's what I was referring to
when I said it was disgusting.
273
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:34,520
It is, of course, disgusting
that you haven't shaved,
274
00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,120
but, understandable. I mean,
sometimes I don't shave either,
275
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:38,440
and that's disgusting too.
276
00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:40,960
So I shall have a razor sent up
to your room straightaway.
277
00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:42,393
Thank you so much,
good night.
278
00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:22,440
Hello?
279
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,400
Audrey, any news?
280
00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:29,120
Oh, dear.
He hasn't?
281
00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:31,190
Oh, I know.
282
00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:37,840
He doesn't deserve you, Audrey.
He really doesn't.
283
00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:39,240
Exactly.
284
00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:41,440
I know you have.
285
00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:43,874
I know.
I know.
286
00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,440
Oh, I know.
287
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,440
Are you gonna go on
like that all night?
288
00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:52,200
What was that,
Audrey?
289
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:54,880
Oh, I know.
290
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:55,880
I know.
291
00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:58,640
Well, why is she
telling you then?
292
00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:00,800
I understand,
dear, I really do.
293
00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:02,240
I can't stand it anymore.
294
00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:04,276
I'll go clean the roof
or something.
295
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:08,080
There's the front doorbell.
Somebody's got back late.
296
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,080
Yes, yes.
297
00:12:10,080 --> 00:12:11,600
I expect they forgot
their passkey.
298
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:12,760
I know.
299
00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,240
Somebody better go
and let them in.
300
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:15,960
- Yes.
- I'll go then, shall I?
301
00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:18,240
- Hmm.
- Yes, I agree. Right. I'll go.
302
00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:20,600
You know who that is,
don't you?
303
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:22,640
That's your pair,
the "Kama Sutra" set.
304
00:12:22,640 --> 00:12:25,560
"Good Evening, welcome to Basil
Fawlty Knocking Shops Limited."
305
00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:28,074
No, dear. It's only Basil.
306
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:33,116
I'm coming, I'm coming.
307
00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:39,000
I mean, I suppose
you know what time it is?
308
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,080
Oh, Mr. Fawlty,
309
00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:42,680
I'm so sorry.
310
00:12:42,680 --> 00:12:44,360
Oh no. It's only
a quarter past 11:00.
311
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:47,040
I got you out
of your bed.
312
00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:49,080
Not at all.
I had a few little jobs to do...
313
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:50,840
Oh, you're so kind.
314
00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:52,640
Oh, well...
315
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:55,160
I had just
a lovely evening.
316
00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:56,800
Did you?
How very nice.
317
00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:59,960
I saw some friends
I hadn't seen for years.
318
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:02,960
I had a little bit
too much to drink, I'm afraid.
319
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,400
What's life for
if one can't get a bit...
320
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:08,080
- Blotto?
- Well, hardly blotto.
321
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:12,400
Mr. Fawlty,
you're so charming.
322
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,520
Well, one does
one's best.
323
00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:15,880
I hope Mrs. Fawlty
324
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:18,080
appreciates
how lucky she is.
325
00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:19,240
I think probably not,
in fact.
326
00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:20,680
Oops!
327
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:22,240
Sorry, I beg...
328
00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:24,834
- Ah, there we are.
- Ha ha ha!
329
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:28,840
Oh, sorry! Sorry.
Ha ha! There you are.
330
00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:30,200
- Carry on.
- We're awfully sorry.
331
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:32,240
It was quite extraordinary.
The front doorbell went
332
00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:34,360
just a moment ago,
and I thought to myself,
333
00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:37,400
"I expect that'll be Alan and uh..."
so, down I go, and lo and behold,
334
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:40,640
it's not you at all, it's Mrs. Peignoir.
Have you met? Alan and uh...
335
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:43,920
this is Mrs. Peignoir. She's an antique dealer,
I mean, she deals in antiques.
336
00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:47,920
She's not frightfully old or anything. Ha, ha.
So, I let her in just 10 secs ago, hardly five,
337
00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:49,560
I mean, hardly time
to say good evening,
338
00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:53,000
in she comes, drops her thing,
down I go and there you are,
339
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,160
bless my soul.
Golly, is that the time?
340
00:13:55,160 --> 00:13:57,320
My goodness, I was thinking
it was a quarter past 10:00.
341
00:13:57,320 --> 00:13:59,240
My God!
I'd better get to bed.
342
00:13:59,240 --> 00:14:02,949
Can't stand around talking all night.
Got to get an early night. Bye!
343
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:05,234
Sorry!
344
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:11,520
Are you all right?
345
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:13,640
Yes, I am.
Good night.
346
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:15,440
- Good night.
- Bonne nuit.
347
00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:17,200
Jean, I'll just
make that call.
348
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,430
- Don't be too long.
- No.
349
00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:27,040
Well?
350
00:14:27,040 --> 00:14:28,840
- Hmm?
- Who was it?
351
00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,520
It was your,
uh, your pair.
352
00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:33,000
Huh. Humph.
353
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:35,798
- Good night.- Bonne nuit.
354
00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:41,680
Oh, and that woman, uh...
355
00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:43,920
Mrs. Peignoir?
356
00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:45,520
Ah, yes.
Something like that.
357
00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:47,670
Dormez bien, Mr. Fawlty.
358
00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:55,000
How's Audrey?
359
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,040
She's in
a terrible state.
360
00:14:57,040 --> 00:14:58,519
Ah, good, good.
361
00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:03,440
There's someone
at the door, Sybil!
362
00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:05,240
Why are you shouting, Basil?
363
00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:06,560
Was I shouting?
Sorry, Sybil.
364
00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:08,640
Well, I'd better go see
who that is, Sybil.
365
00:15:08,640 --> 00:15:12,400
I expect it's some key
who forgot to get the guest for their door.
366
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:14,880
Or something like that,
some innocent explanation.
367
00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:16,440
- Ha, are you ready, Sybil?
- I'm ready.
368
00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:18,280
Right. I'll just see
who that is then, Sybil.
369
00:15:18,280 --> 00:15:20,748
All right, Sybil?
370
00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:23,239
Hello?
371
00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:27,397
Hello?
372
00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:31,480
- Ah.
- Aaah!
373
00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:34,640
Oh, so sorry, Mr. Fawlty.
Poor Mr. Fawlty.
374
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:36,640
Are you all right?
375
00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:38,440
No, I'm dying,
but don't get out of bed.
376
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:40,840
I hurt you,
and you so wonderful to me.
377
00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:42,680
Give me such beautiful present.
Thank you!
378
00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:44,640
You're drunk,
Manuel!
379
00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:47,920
No, no. Is beautiful.
Is my first one. Thank you.
380
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,480
Now listen... argh!
381
00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:51,640
Oh, poor
Mr. Fawlty.
382
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:56,040
So sorry. Please, Mr. Fawlty,
I love you, I love you!
383
00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:57,520
You so kind to me,
you so good to me!
384
00:15:57,520 --> 00:15:58,840
I love you!
385
00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:01,080
Basil, I'm tryingto read In here.
386
00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:03,640
Since I come here
from Spain
387
00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:05,160
leaving my five mothers,
388
00:16:05,160 --> 00:16:07,799
and four aunties with no...
389
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:17,000
Et maintenant,un peu de caf�?
390
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,800
Ah, oui, s'll vous pl�it.Caf� au lait.
391
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:20,640
- Caf� what?
- Au lait.
392
00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:22,312
Ah, ol�. Quite.
393
00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:43,480
There we are.
Voil� sommes nous.
394
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:44,840
- Caf� pour vous.- "Vous"?
395
00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:46,200
Pas pour toi?
396
00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:47,800
Well, I'll probably
have one later.
397
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:49,640
- Very funny.
- Oh good, good.
398
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,320
Oh, Mr. Fawlty, I forget.
399
00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:53,880
The window in my bedroom,
I can't open it. Could you?
400
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,553
Oh, certainly, I'll pop up
and fix it. Certainly.
401
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:04,835
For you, and this one...
402
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,240
Thank you so much.
403
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:14,240
Manuel?
404
00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:15,240
Oh, is terrible!
405
00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:16,400
Go to the kitchen,
Manuel.
406
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:17,400
I cannot.
407
00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:18,920
Go to the kitchen
immediately.
408
00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:20,000
Come on, Manuel.
409
00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:21,840
No, no, please,
I die here. Please.
410
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:23,680
Sorry about this.
411
00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:25,680
He's been overworking
awfully hard recently.
412
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:26,720
Can I help?
413
00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,760
No, I can manage.
Thank you, Polly.
414
00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:31,149
- Come on.
- Oh, no, please.
415
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:33,480
He's at it again.
Look.
416
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:34,480
It's disgusting.
417
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:35,480
I beg your pardon?
418
00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:36,480
Nothing.
419
00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:37,480
I thought you
said something?
420
00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:40,040
No, no. Carry on.
421
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:49,076
Get on with your meals.
422
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:52,280
Thank you, Mr. Lloyd.
423
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:54,160
And this is just
for tonight, isn't it?
424
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,640
- That's right.
- Will you be taking lunch?
425
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,200
We won't have time,
I'm afraid.
426
00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:58,760
We've got this wedding
at half past 2:00.
427
00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:00,640
I wonder, could
I make a call?
428
00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:02,040
Please,
use that phone.
429
00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:03,120
Would it be possible
430
00:18:03,120 --> 00:18:05,040
to have sandwiches
sent up to the room?
431
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,200
Certainly.
Here's the key.
432
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:08,240
I'll have your bags
brought up in a moment.
433
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:10,360
Would you like coffee
with the sandwiches?
434
00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:12,480
Yes, please.
435
00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:13,840
Mum!
436
00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:16,200
Hello, darling.
Hello, Alan.
437
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:17,280
Hello, Rachel.
438
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:19,000
Where's Phillip?
Did he have a good trip?
439
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,960
Marvelous,
he's upstairs.
440
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:22,920
Could I speak
to Mrs. Brice, please?
441
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:24,320
I'll see you
in a moment.
442
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:27,040
I'm just going
to finish my breakfast.
443
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:28,400
There they are.
444
00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:29,560
Where's the key?
445
00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:31,080
He's alreadytaken It up, Basil.
446
00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:32,160
All right.
447
00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:33,320
Anne?
448
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,000
It's Rachel Lloyd here.
How's everything?
449
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:37,520
I'm going to take
your cases upstairs.
450
00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:38,873
Yes, I know.
451
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:41,873
Darling, it's beautiful,
thank you.
452
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,519
Sybil, Sybil.
453
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:00,080
- Ah, hello.
- Hello.
454
00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:02,640
- It's Mrs. Lloyd, isn't it?
- That's right.
455
00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:04,360
How do you do?
Fawlty, Basil Fawlty.
456
00:19:04,360 --> 00:19:06,440
- How do you do?
- Pretty well, can't complain.
457
00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,520
Good.
458
00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:10,160
We had this door
knocked through recently.
459
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:11,880
Made a rather good job of it,
don't you think?
460
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:14,040
Yes, yes.
It's very nice.
461
00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:15,720
Marvelous.
Changed our lives, really.
462
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:18,200
Used to have to do the 100 yards
through there and back again,
463
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,080
but now we can just
sort of open it and...
464
00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:23,120
it isn't working
as well as it usually does. Ha!
465
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:25,680
You can go right in.
466
00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:28,920
Just like that. Marvelous. Really.
Rather simple, but effective.
467
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:31,680
Would you like to have a try,
see the kitchen and...
468
00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:33,360
I'd love to one day,
but I think just now,
469
00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:36,193
I'd better get upstairs.
So, I'll see you later.
470
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:40,200
You all right?
471
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:43,760
Bit of trouble with the old leg,
I'd better sit down here for a moment.
472
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:45,880
Bit of shrapnel,
Korean war. Still in there.
473
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:47,840
Can't they get it out?
474
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:49,600
No, too deep,
too deep.
475
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,800
Well, this is the kitchen,
as you can see.
476
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:53,840
- What?
- The kitchen, yes.
477
00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:55,520
We had it plastered
about five years ago.
478
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:58,193
We've got a few cracks
up there now.
479
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:03,480
Oh, don't worry about him.
He's just having a lie down.
480
00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:08,156
He's Spanish. From Barcelona.
You know, sort of siesta. But he's fine.
481
00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:11,280
It was his birthday
yesterday.
482
00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:15,080
We have a few cracks up there now,
but nothing serious.
483
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:18,160
As I say, it's not the Sistine Chapel,
but we're very happy with it.
484
00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:20,320
Are you sure
he's all right?
485
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:22,440
Oh, yes.
Yes, he's fine. Yes.
486
00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:23,440
But he's groaning.
487
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:24,640
Is he? Is he?
488
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:25,840
Can't you hear him?
489
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:28,000
So he is.
Listen, I just remembered
490
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:31,120
I left your cases just outside your room,
by mistake.
491
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:33,440
Would you mind if I went up
and put them inside now?
492
00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:34,800
Unless there's
anything else...
493
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:35,840
Don't you think perhaps
we should open...
494
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:38,360
No, no, no! Don't worry about that.
My wife will deal with that. Sybil!
495
00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:40,720
So, if you'd like to,
uh...
496
00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:42,392
Come on! Come along.
497
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:43,914
Come in.
498
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:47,800
Your sandwiches,
Mr. Lloyd.
499
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:49,600
Polly!
500
00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:51,440
- Hello.
- How are you?
501
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:53,800
- Fantastic.
- It's great to see you.
502
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:56,440
You're still gorgeous.
503
00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:57,873
Dear, dear, dear.
504
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:08,950
Is anything the matter?
505
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:13,440
Mrs. Lloyd, could I
have a word with you?
506
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,240
You are.
507
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,240
Well, there's something
that I need to explain.
508
00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:19,680
- Well?
- Could we go in there?
509
00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:21,840
Oh, really,
is it absolutely necessary?
510
00:21:21,840 --> 00:21:23,831
I'm afraid it is.
511
00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:26,353
Thank you.
512
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:31,600
Mrs. Lloyd,
I'm so sorry...
513
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:35,480
but... this is...
514
00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,038
a much nicer room
515
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:39,400
than the one
we've given you.
516
00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:40,480
- What?
- I'm sorry,
517
00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:43,600
I was just saying that this room
is so much nicer than yours,
518
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:46,640
and I wanted to bring you in here now,
and show it to you and apologize,
519
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:50,160
in case you found out about it later,
and got rather cross.
520
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,360
Now, um,
the point is...
521
00:21:52,360 --> 00:21:55,840
What is? The point is if it turns out
you don't like that room
522
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:58,800
um, then we can always move you in here
but I don't think it's worth doing
523
00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:02,040
until you've definitely decided
you don't like that one as much as this one,
524
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:06,240
then we can sit down, a round table,
sort of discuss it, kind of chew it over,
525
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:09,152
and, uh...
526
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:11,720
And it'd be
a piece of cake.
527
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,029
Bob's your uncle.
Okay?
528
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:17,319
Fine.
529
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:19,389
Oh, sorry.
Sorry.
530
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:21,719
Thank you.
531
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,280
Oh, thank you.
Thank you very much.
532
00:22:26,280 --> 00:22:28,032
I wondered where
you were, darling.
533
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:32,440
Darling?
534
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:34,476
Darling,
are you all right?
535
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:38,517
This room is exactly the same
as the one that he just...
536
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:44,080
Oh, Jean, it's
absolutely smashing!
537
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:45,360
A bit tight
across the bust.
538
00:22:45,360 --> 00:22:46,720
Oh, I love it.
539
00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:47,920
Lower, lower.
540
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:49,800
- Are you sure?
- Can I pick it up tonight?
541
00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:53,560
Lower, low... ah!
That's it, that's it.
542
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,200
That is amazing!
543
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,880
That Is amazing!
544
00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,359
Aww, ha, ha ha!
545
00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:10,000
Hey, baby,
546
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,000
have youbeen taking lessons?
547
00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:14,434
So, I'll see you tonight, huh?
548
00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:18,230
For 10 quid,
that's absolutely fantastic.
549
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:31,468
Oh.
550
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:35,436
No, no, no.
551
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:37,960
No, no, no.
552
00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:38,995
No!
553
00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:45,880
Polly, I want to see you at reception
in one minute in your hat and coat.
554
00:23:45,880 --> 00:23:46,880
I'm sorry?
555
00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:47,960
I want to see you
at reception
556
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:49,240
in one minute
in your hat and coat!
557
00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:52,152
- Will they fit you?
- No. What? You, you!
558
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,040
- They're going.
- What?
559
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,393
They're going!
560
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:05,720
I'm sorry,
but you'll have to go.
561
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:08,160
We've made a mistake,
all these rooms are taken.
562
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:09,840
She was sitting on him.
563
00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:12,520
Five minutes later,
I found him lying on the floor
564
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:14,238
underneath the waiter.
565
00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:17,880
I'm sorry, but...
566
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:19,520
ah, there you are.
Got together, have you?
567
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:21,640
Yes, yes. I might have guessed,
mightn't I?
568
00:24:21,640 --> 00:24:24,640
Yes, I see. Of course, we're a bit
behind the times down here in Torquay.
569
00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:26,400
I'm sorry,
but you'll have to go.
570
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:27,880
We made a mistake.
All these rooms are taken.
571
00:24:27,880 --> 00:24:30,280
I'm so sorry.
572
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:31,720
Well, actually,
I'm not sorry.
573
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:33,040
I mean, you come in here,
just like that,
574
00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:36,240
and, well, to be perfectly blunt,
you have a very good time at our expense.
575
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:37,760
I mean, I think you
know what I mean, hmm?
576
00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:40,600
I mean you have had a very,very good time, haven't you?
577
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:43,831
Well, not here you don't, oh, no!
Thank you and good night!
578
00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:54,800
Well... that's
taken care of that!
579
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:56,240
Basil, what is going on?
580
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:58,000
Why did you tell Polly
to get her hat and coat?
581
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:00,640
Because she's going, along with the Lloyds
and that pair you let in.
582
00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:02,640
Never seen anything like it
in my life. My God!
583
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:04,800
Basil, what are you on about?
Why are they leaving?
584
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:07,280
I'll tell you exactly why they're leaving.
First of all, I go up there
585
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:08,680
and find that girl in his arms,
in Lloyd's arms.
586
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:10,280
Five minutes later,
Polly's in there.
587
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:12,440
- What girl?
- Th... that girl.
588
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:15,000
- She's his daughter.
- What?
589
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:20,074
She's Mr. Lloyd's stepdaughter.
They're all one family.
590
00:25:35,080 --> 00:25:36,560
What about Polly?
591
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:39,720
She was at school with Jean.
She's known them all for years.
592
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,400
- For years, huh?
- For years.
593
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:42,760
What have I done?
594
00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:45,200
- What have you done?
- I've told them to leave.
595
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:47,080
You've told them to leave?
596
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:48,760
How was I supposed to know?
597
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:51,000
Why didn't you tell me,
you half-wit?
598
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:52,840
Why didn't they tell me?
You can't blame me for this!
599
00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:54,320
Go and tell them
they can stay.
600
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:56,520
- Why don't you go tell them?
- I didn't tell them to go.
601
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,360
Oh no, I suppose
it's all my fault, isn't it?
602
00:25:58,360 --> 00:25:59,840
Go and tell them.
Now!
603
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:00,840
No, I won't.
604
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:02,040
- You will.
- No, no, I won't.
605
00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:03,640
- Oh, yes, you will.
- Yes, I will! Right.
606
00:26:03,640 --> 00:26:05,680
That's right, leave it to me,
let me get you out of it.
607
00:26:05,680 --> 00:26:07,040
That's all I'm good for,
isn't it?
608
00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:09,640
"Basil Fawlty, Limited,
other people's messes cleared up
609
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:11,160
by appointment to my wife,
Sybil."
610
00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:12,240
What am I going to say?!
611
00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:14,240
Tell them
you made a mistake.
612
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,080
Oh, brilliant!
613
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:17,640
Brilliant.
614
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:21,720
Is that what made Britain great?
"I'm so sorry, I made a mistake."
615
00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:24,234
What have you got for brains?
Sponge cake?!
616
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,840
Very nice, very nice.
Take 'em off, get back to work.
617
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:31,680
I'm so sorry.
I made a mistake.
618
00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:34,040
"I'm so sorry.
I made a mistake."
619
00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:36,200
"I'm so sorry.
I made a mistake."
620
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:39,200
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry,
but my wife has made a mistake.
621
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:40,640
I don't know how
she did it, but she did.
622
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:42,880
She's made a complete pudding
of the whole thing, as usual.
623
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:45,040
It'll be perfectly all right.
I've sorted it all out.
624
00:26:45,040 --> 00:26:46,640
I'm frightfully sorry,
but you know what women are like.
625
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:48,080
They've got one brain
between the lot of them...
626
00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:51,280
not all of them, but some of them have,
including my wife. So please, do stay,
627
00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:54,033
and see you all later on.
Thank you so much.
628
00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:57,720
I was just saying
please do stay,
629
00:26:57,720 --> 00:26:59,520
my wife made
a most dreadful mistake.
630
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:02,671
Yes, I think
she probably did.
631
00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:10,440
Evening, Fawlty.
632
00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:11,880
Ah, evening, Major.
633
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:13,640
Papers arrived yet?
634
00:27:13,640 --> 00:27:15,760
Oh, yes. Sorry they're so late.
Didn't get here till 5:00.
635
00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:17,080
Have to have a word
with them again.
636
00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:19,640
Where's your lady wife
this evening?
637
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:21,280
She's spending the night
at Audrey's.
638
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:23,880
George has walked out on her again,
so she's in the usual state.
639
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:26,200
Still, it must have
upset her a bit.
640
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,640
Yes, but she makes such
a song and dance about it.
641
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:31,200
You don't like Audrey
very much, do you?
642
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:32,520
Dreadful woman,
dreadful.
643
00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:36,320
I think it's very decent
of your wife to go around there
644
00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:38,000
and listen to all that rubbish.
645
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:39,760
Couldn't do without her,
Major.
646
00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:42,160
She's a fine woman,
Mrs. Fawlty.
647
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,160
No, no.
I wouldn't say that.
648
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,280
No, nor would I.
649
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:49,272
- Good night, Fawlty.
- Good night, Major.
650
00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:54,960
Ah, Mr. Fawlty.
651
00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:56,280
Good evening. Sorry.
652
00:27:56,280 --> 00:27:59,560
No, no, don't switch it off.
I love Chopin.
653
00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:01,551
Really?
Ah, there's your key.
654
00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:05,240
Ah, it's so romantic.
655
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:06,640
Yes, exactly.
656
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:08,840
Are you romantic,
Mr. Fawlty?
657
00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:11,320
No, God, no.
658
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:13,280
Well, I think
you are.
659
00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:15,920
I think, beneath
that English exterior
660
00:28:15,920 --> 00:28:18,080
throbs a passion
that would make
661
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:20,200
Lord Byron look
like a tobacconist.
662
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,475
No way.
No, sorry.
663
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:28,235
Oh, don't look so bashful.
I won't try and sit on you again.
664
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,000
And where is your
charming wife this evening?
665
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:38,920
She's spending the night
with a friend.
666
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:41,560
- Hmm.
- A girl, a lady friend.
667
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:43,640
When the cat's away, eh?
668
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:45,480
Oh, hardly.
Too much to do.
669
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:47,480
- Well, good night.
- Bonne nuit.
670
00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:48,840
- Oh, Mr. Fawlty?
- Yes?
671
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:50,240
Did you fix my window?
672
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:51,840
Oh... uh, damn.
673
00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:54,240
If you could, please?
It's so hot tonight.
674
00:28:54,240 --> 00:28:56,231
Yes. Yes, okay.
Right.
675
00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:08,800
Ungh!
Here we are.
676
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:11,120
You're so strong.
677
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:14,600
Well, I'm sure you are, too,
if you put your mind to it.
678
00:29:14,600 --> 00:29:16,200
Your wife
shouldn't leave you
679
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:17,360
with strange women.
680
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:19,200
Well, I wouldn't call you
that strange.
681
00:29:19,200 --> 00:29:22,040
Mr. Fawlty,
you're so charming.
682
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:23,080
Only a little.
Oh, well...
683
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:24,840
Do you feelthat breeze?
684
00:29:24,840 --> 00:29:25,920
Isn't it wonderful?
685
00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:27,440
Yes, it's nice,
isn't it?
686
00:29:27,440 --> 00:29:29,880
I shall sleep
au naturelle tonight.
687
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:32,640
Good idea, right.
688
00:29:32,640 --> 00:29:35,040
Only it's not
so much fun on your own.
689
00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:36,720
Oh, well.
One could always pretend.
690
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:39,280
Ooh! Twinge from the old leg.
Better go and lie down.
691
00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:40,880
- Good night.
- Good night.
692
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:42,518
Damn shrapnel.
693
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:57,720
Uh, who is it?
694
00:29:57,720 --> 00:29:59,233
Mr. Fawlty?
695
00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:03,640
Hello.
696
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,040
I'm so sorry, but I have
to leave early tomorrow.
697
00:30:06,040 --> 00:30:07,920
Could I have a call
at 7:00, please?
698
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:10,600
Marvelous. Is that all?
Absolutely. 7:00.
699
00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:12,670
Please don't go yet.
700
00:30:13,680 --> 00:30:15,760
I think you've
forgotten something.
701
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:17,040
Did I? Damn...
702
00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:19,040
Your recorder.
703
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:20,760
Oh, thank you.
704
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:23,680
- You left it in my room.
- Thank you so much.
705
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:24,960
You left it in my room
706
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:27,315
so you could come
and get it, didn't you?
707
00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:32,040
I'm not having you
knocking on my door
708
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:33,359
in the middle
of the night.
709
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:37,560
I should go... go.
710
00:30:37,560 --> 00:30:39,240
You naughty man.
711
00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:40,559
- Good night.
- Good night.
712
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:06,080
Look, go to your room.
I won't ask you again.
713
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:07,640
Open the door.
714
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:08,800
Listen, I can't.
715
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:11,040
My wife has just got back
unexpectedly.
716
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:12,360
She's in the bathroom.
717
00:31:12,360 --> 00:31:13,520
What, dear?
718
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:16,080
I think you'll find it
on the second shelf,
719
00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:17,080
Sybil darling.
720
00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:18,680
Let me in, Basil.
721
00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:20,960
Look, you'll meet somebody else
sooner or later.
722
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:22,120
Basil!
723
00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:24,600
Try to control yourself.
Where do you think you are, Paris?
724
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:26,480
Let me in!
725
00:31:26,480 --> 00:31:29,000
Shut up, will you?
You silly tart!
726
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,880
Go away.
My wife will hear us.
727
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:33,598
This is your wife.
728
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:41,278
Oh, what
a terrible dream!
729
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:51,040
There's a burglar
downstairs.
730
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:52,320
George got back,
did he?
731
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:54,280
There's a burglar
downstairs!
732
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:56,271
- What?
- A burglar. Quick!
733
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:19,908
Manuel?
734
00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:26,238
Good night.
735
00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:30,549
We've been to a wedding.
0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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