All language subtitles for Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990) - S10E05 - The Loo-Ouch (480p DVD x265 Panda)

Yeah? Hello?

This is Radio 109.7,

and if you can tell us
what song we're playing,

you could win $10,000.

This is Special Agent
Kincaid with the FBI.

This call is being traced.

- Shh!
- Federal agents are on their way.

We're in trouble.

Hang up.

Oh, man.

You gotta love these
phony phone calls.

Oh, it's the tenth
time this week

those juvenile
delinquents have called.

Ow, ow!

Well, since I'm up...

What, are you gonna work?

Yeah.

I've always liked
writing at night.

Well, since I'm up...

In a few moments
we'll return to our...

Uh, the reason I
like writing at night

is because it's usually quiet.

Gone With the Wind.

It's my favorite.

When I was a little girl I
dressed up like Scarlett

- for Halloween. It was great.
- Mm-hmm.

Well, I tell you
what. Why don't we...

We'll catch the second half
of this down in your room.

What, are you sending
me to my room?

No, it's just I...

You know, I want to
write and it's... late.

Look for the bright red...

We had time for sex.

Well, yeah.

No, it's okay.

Next time you want to pencil
me in, you just let me know.

Hey, you got a second?

Ice machine's down the hall.

I know, I live here.
And I've seen you

coming out of here at all hours.

- Good for you.
- Listen, if you want

a late-night shift, I got a gig.

Lot of girls who work the
hotel dance at my club.

- What?
- Strictly high rollers.

- Now, why don't you do a little tryout for me...?
- Why don't you

- take your hand off my arm?
- You are making a big mistake.

Hey, I-I-I don't mean
to step on your dime.

If she's still
servicing you, I can...

Yeah.

- Now apologize to the lady.
- Why? He made me feel

the same way you do.

My parents kicked
me out of the house

when they found
out we were dating.

This is different.

Yeah, it's so much worse.

Mom, Dad.

- You know Steve.
- Hi.

You're pregnant?

Yes, I am.

All right, come on, Michelle.

Please, don't go.

We have an announcement to make.

A, uh, second announcement.

It's one that we hope
you'll be happy about.

Because we are.

We're getting married.

No problem. I'll
bring it to your table.

Well, this is all so unexpected.

Janet, you're too
young to marry.

You haven't dated enough...

Men who are Japanese?

There are so many
things you wanted to do.

Like marry the man I love.

Which is exactly what I'm gonna
do, whether you like it or not.

You're disgracing our family.

Come on, Michelle.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪ I know that there's
no time at all ♪

♪ But I know something
you don't know ♪

♪ Yeah, I've been waiting here ♪

♪ Far too long to fight it ♪

♪ You'll never go it alone ♪

♪ I won't let you ♪

♪ You'll never
go it alone again ♪

♪ Oh, you can't deny ♪

♪ It's true ♪

♪ You know I don't mean
to be hard on you... ♪

My point is there is...

there's the guy you
hear on the radio, right?

- There's him and then there's me.
- Mm-hmm.

Oh, the guy that I kissed.

- Exactly.
- Which is funny,

because, you know, you
sound exactly like the guy that

- reviewed that kiss to thousands of listeners.
- Wait, yeah,

but that was the other guy.

Oh, I keep forgetting.

- You're Mr. Average.
- Average?

- Mmm.
- Ow. You know, I-I...

Things were going so good,

I was kinda hoping
I'd rate a notch higher,

- but I guess...
- You do. You do.

- Look, I know you hate my show.
- It's...

Okay?

Sometimes I hate my show.

Here's my suggestion to you.

All right? Listen to me.

The next time
you hear that guy...

- The jerk?
- The jerk.

Uh-huh.

Just.. turn it off.

Just reach out and
turn the radio off.

- I can do that.
- Okay.

The question is,
can you do that?

Absolutely.

What?

You didn't buy it? Absolutely.

That one sound better?

Hey, look who's here!

A rep from KVIB dropped off

a box of these.

"If you're gonna play,
you might as well score."

Wait, R... that's the other
guy. All right? That's the jerk.

It's not me.

You know, I wish
I believed that.

So, wait a minute.

When her parents found
out she was pregnant,

- they didn't even sit down?
- Mm-mmm.

We're expecting a
baby in three months,

and we're trying
to plan a wedding

- that includes both our families.
- Mmm.

And you got lunch
with your old man today.

Oh, yeah, the fun
never ends, does it?

How's Janet holding up?

She dragged me out to
the hardware store last night,

just to find some
color swatches...

then stays up all night

obsessing over what
color to paint the nursery.

Did you guys, uh, find a place?

Add that to the never-ending
list of things to do.

What about here?

Well, it'd be great,
but it's not big enough.

With the nursery, we're
one bedroom short.

Not if one of us moved out.

I couldn't ask you to do that.

Steve, you got
enough to deal with

without worrying about
where you're gonna live.

You'd do that?

Well, not for you, but
for Janet and the kid?

- Yeah, we'd do that.
- Hmm.

Oh, that is a huge relief!

Oh! Thanks, guys.

Seriously.

- Mm-hmm.
- All right.

Hey, don't worry about it.

Have a great day.

Yeah.

Okay.

I don't know about you,

but "no problem"
isn't exactly accurate.

No, it's not even close, man.

I'm broke.

This is bound to bring up
the whole living-together issue.

Not for me.

Donna doesn't want
to, and you know what?

I am standing alone
on this one, buddy.

- Hello.
- Hey.

Mmm.

Is this for a new display?

Uh, no. These are decorations

for Steve and Janet's
engagement party.

Hmm, well, I think you
can scratch Janet's parents

off the guest list.

She was so freaked
out after seeing them,

she stayed up all night picking
out colors for the nursery.

Nursery? What nursery?

Um... the one going
in Noah's room.

Or mine.

Somebody's moving out?

Maybe me.

I don't know.

But it raises some issues.

Or, you know, opportunities.

For us.

Excuse me.

- Do you have any handbags?
- Oh.

Yeah, right over there.

Oh, there.

Well, you get back to work,

and we can talk
about this later, okay?

- Okay.
- All right.

Did I hear Matt's voice?

Yeah.

We were just talking about
moving in together, I think.

- What?
- Well,

apparently, Steve and Janet

are gonna be staying
in the Walsh house.

What about Matt and Noah?

Somebody's gotta go.

Noah didn't mention it to you?

No.

Well, I'm sure he will.

Where's Dylan?

I don't know.

Look, I've got this
month's rent check for him.

Fine, I'll take it.

No, no, no, no, no.

I want to give it to him myself.

I want to explain why
it's a little short this month.

Oh, you didn't sell
enough Jell-O shots?

That's the lease agreement.

I do all the work, he reaps
all the benefits, you know.

Well, of course he does.

If it makes you feel any better,

that's his approach
to romance, too.

That guy gives me an idea.

What if I told you...

that we could double your money,

and you wouldn't have to
share a penny with Dylan?

- We?
- Yeah, me and you.

That's already a bad idea.

All right, well, whatever.
I was just thinking,

you know, a little side venture.

I'd plan it, you'd run it.

Just a little
after-hours business.

But it's cool.

After hours, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Strippers, lap dancing.

Rich guys plus
sleazy girls equals...

money.

Yeah, and trouble.

Yeah.

Tell me your
decision to get married

has nothing to do
with the pregnancy.

Nothing.

Shotgun weddings
don't work, son.

Dad, no one's
forcing this marriage.

Have some sparkling water
and chopsticks, please?

They love it when
you use chopsticks.

Dad, I could use your support.

You got it, son.

Married or not, you got that.

Look, why don't you
order for us, huh?

Uh, maybe a nice, uh,

spicy meat dish or something.

They always keep
the best dishes a secret

for the, uh... Chinese,
not-not your people.

I know.

He needs therapy.

Sir, I'm not sure
what you'd like,

because I'm both
Vietnamese and a vegetarian.

So, I haven't tried
the meat dishes.

Could you give us
a minute, please?

Okay, here's what I think.

You have the child first.

And then you see how
it goes between you.

See how it goes?

So you're saying
don't get married?

Just so you know,

Janet and I love
each other very much.

We're not gonna
take your advice.

Let's go.

- Whoa.
- Oh, great.

You smell good.

Uh, don't, Dylan.

I just came to pick up my
bag, and here's your key.

I was gonna order some
dinner. Why don't you stay?

- I'm off the clock.
- Oh.

Gina, the living situation...

It has nothing to do
with how I feel about you.

No, Dylan, don't even
tell... You know what?

- You make me feel like a whore.
- You know I want...

- Do you know that?
- I want to be with you.

- I don't want to live with you.
- Oh. I don't even want

to hear it. It's always
about you, isn't it?

Mr. McKay, I'm Maria Alvarez.

I'm a housekeeper
here at the hotel.

Yeah.

And my sons have something
they'd like to say to you.

Uh, sorry

- about the phony phone calls.
- Me, too.

It's my fault. Ever since

the community center
stopped their programs,

I've had to bring
them to work with me.

I take it Hector caught you.

Yeah.

Yeah, Hector used to
bust me, too, all the time.

May I have a word with the boys?

Okay.

All right, you two
knuckleheads, listen to me.

You see this joker
over here, room 701?

This guy needs a
wakeup call every, uh...

every 15 minutes starting
at 6:00 in the morning.

You guys think
you can handle it?

No problem.

Remember,

I owe you one,

and I am the best, so
when you least expect it,

expect it.

All right?

Get out of here.

Get a haircut.

Why hasn't Noah told me
he might be moving out?

Noah's moving out?

I don't know. He
hasn't mentioned it.

That's weird, right?

I'm sure there's an explanation.

Okay, um, let's get
back to party planning.

We'll just forget about Noah.

Let's forget about Janet's
parents' hostility, too, okay?

Let's forget about Steve's
father's insensitivity.

I think it's about the
hostility, don't you?

A hula skirt, anyone? Anyone?

Well, at-at least your
mom's happy about the news.

You know what? Thank
God she's out of town filming

in Toronto. You know why?

See, she's a Caucasian,
and she's a lesbian,

which means she's a
double threat to your parents.

Have the baby, see how it goes?

Did your father say,
"Date other women,"

or was that just the subtext?

Oh, please, Janet!

Well, we could call
the florist about the leis.

- Hey...
- Surprise!

Hi, Karen.

Hey, congratulations.

Oh.

Oh, gosh, your mom
told me about the party,

and though she couldn't make it,

I was in San Diego on
business, and she insisted I come.

- Oh, good.
- Oh, you must be Janet.

Yes, uh, Donna, Janet...

- Hi.
- This is Karen Lewis,

my mom's girlfriend.
Uh, partner?

Y-You're here for the
engagement party?

I'm here to represent
the healthy, loving side

of Steve's family in your
gorgeous mother's absence.

I can't wait to
meet your parents.

Huh.

Janet?

Hey, are you all
right? Is it the baby?

Something's wrong.

Call Dr. Long.

Tell her to meet
us at the hospital.

Oh, my God.

All right, so after

- the club closes...
- We open for an after party.

Right. 20 bucks a head.

No. You know what?

We can get 30. Trust me.

Really?

- Yes.
- Okay, but all

the girls negotiate their
own deals and pocket

their own money,

and they can negotiate
whatever else they want.

Okay, how do we fill the seats?

Compliments of
Kelly's publicist.

You know, it's so weird, because

she lost her contact
list of power players,

and suddenly, it
ended up in my purse.

- Finders keepers.
- Losers weepers.

That's right.

So what's up with your sudden
change of heart, anyway?

First and last month's rent.

You moving out of
the Walsh house?

Maybe, and you know,

apartments are a lot more
expensive than I remember.

What about moving in with Donna?

She wouldn't want
to, and even if she did,

I'm not gonna freeload off her.

Yeah, well, considering
how bad it feels

for me to freeload off of Dylan,

I guess you're probably
making the right decision.

Then why are you staying
here, living off his money?

Because I'm
broke, just like you.

All right, now, I'm
just curious here.

I mean, what happened to all the
money Donna's mom forked over?

My mother spent it all.

Doesn't matter.

I'm gonna make it all
back... and then some.

I can't remember the last time

anybody asked to
use our projector.

Mm, yeah, well, video and
DVD... It's not quite the same thing.

Oh, hold on a second.

Sientense aquí, por favor.

And finish your homework.

And don't move.

Do you hear me?

Oh, yeah, when
you least expect it,

expect it.

- You're good.
- Very good.

Mm.

Homework.

Now!

I'm happy to say, the ultrasound

images were normal,

the baby's heart
rate was normal,

and your blood work was normal.

- So she's okay?
- As far as we can tell,

mother and baby
are absolutely fine.

Thank God.

Then why did it feel like

my heart was beating a
million miles a minute?

Have you been under a lot

of stress lately?

Some.

From what you describe,

you might have
had a panic attack.

A panic attack?

We were just sitting
around talking.

I've never had one before.

Good.

Let's avoid another.

I'm reluctant

to prescribe any medication
this late in your pregnancy,

so my advice is, light exercise,

plenty of rest,

and most of all,

avoid stressful situations.

Janet.

Mom, what are you doing here?

I called her.

Are you all right?

I'm okay.

Oh, thank God.

I was so terrified.

That makes two of us.
I completely panicked.

Oh, being pregnant can be scary.

I know. I was with you.

There have been so many
times I've wanted to call you.

Well, your health,

this child...

That's the most
important thing now.

Remember, no stress.

I'm Michelle Sosna,
Janet's mother.

I know Donna, but, uh...

Uh, Mrs. Sosna, this is Karen.

- Hi.
- My adopted sister.

Come on, sis.

Let's get some coffee.

I'll explain. I'll explain.

Grand Central
Market was amazing.

Yes.

And Angels Flight...
Oh, that was so cool.

Shortest railway in the world.

Thank you for taking me.

Thank you for giving
me another chance.

What did I tell you, huh?

Me and the guy on the
air don't have to mix, right?

You know, I would love
to invite you in right now,

but I would feel
really weird about it.

So don't.

You don't have to.

But then you won't call.

I mean, it's your
choice. I'm just saying...

- I'll call you tomorrow.
- Come on, David.

I listen to your show.
This was our third date.

Either you're in or you're out.

We sleep together tonight,

or I'm history, right?
Isn't that your rule?

Want to hang out tomorrow night?

If you're offering
me an extension

on that deadline, I
think I'm gonna pass.

My friends Steve and Janet are
throwing an engagement party.

It's a luau.

Ah... sounds
irresistible, doesn't it?

I really want you
to meet my friends.

I'll think about it.

You do that.

Good night.

Thanks.

I saw this, uh, townhouse
today, driving back from work.

And it had two bedrooms, an
office, upper and lower deck.

Mm. Sounds big.

Well, not for two people.

Come on, let's give it a shot.

I think it'd be fun.

It-It would be fun someday.

I like living with Donna, I like

walking around with a mud mask,

knowing there are nights
when I don't have to look cute.

Oh, mud masks are cute.

I like things the way they are.

Things are good, right?

Just thought they
could be better, that's all.

I'm not saying they wouldn't be.

No. You're just talking
about living with Donna

and beauty treatments

and pretty much
everything but us, right?

I have to tell you something.

Okay, I'm listening.

I can't make the luau.

Oh.

Okay. Is that it?

I got so much work at the club.

Restock the
shelves, do the books,

and we are way over budget.

Anything else?

I'm crazy about you.

Come on, Noah.

I know that you
might be moving out.

Matt told Kelly, and...

- And Kelly told you?
- Yeah.

Look, it's my problem.

I'll deal with it.

It's not our problem?

I'm getting my own place.

It's no big deal.

Mm-hmm.

What? Are you kidding me?

This club is gonna
make every other club

in Los Angeles look
like a church picnic.

Yes.

Of course I'm gonna be there.

Yeah. No, just bring
whoever you want.

Okay. Yeah, hold...

Yeah? Come in!

Hey, I'll see you there.

Okay, bye.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait, wait. Excuse me.

Uh, that's... This... You
have the wrong room.

This-This is... This isn't...

That is... What...
What are you doing?

- What?
- Well, here you go.

That's for your enjoyment.

Now, take a ticket.
Take-Take two.

- What?
- So I can be your date.

Thank you very much.

Now give me that back.

Enjoy the show, miss.

Quickly, gentlemen.

We have a beautiful
young woman to impress.

Uh, it was Gone With
the Wind, was it not?

Gone With the Wind.

Oh, yeah.

And it is show time. Yeow!

You're insane.

All right, let's just... Ow.

- What are you...?
- What is that?

- Oh, wait. I'll...
- Is that your date book?

- Here, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Get that out of here.

Okay.

Yeah.

Mmm.

I hope Kelly and Donna
never come home.

Mm-hmm.

- How's that feel? Good?
- Good.

- How about some of that ice cream?
- Okay.

You'll get it!

Mr. and Mrs. Sosna!

Come in, please.

- Hi.
- Hi.

We've come because now we
have an announcement to make.

I told him about your scare.

Some events can be
a blessing in disguise.

I shouldn't have
pushed you away.

You're right, you
shouldn't have.

She's your daughter,
and she needs you.

I couldn't agree with you more.

Which is why we want
you to move back in with us.

Is that your announcement?

We want to help: with the child,

with expenses, with everything.

Well, thanks, but we're fine.

And I'm gonna keep working.

What about school?

You'd always talked about

a graduate program
in French literature.

But that was two years ago, Dad,

and you said that
was a waste of money.

We'll take care of it.

And the baby.

And you can have
freedom, and be a mother.

Excuse me,

but where do I fit

into this happy, well-funded
picture you're painting?

You're the child's father.

You can come visit.

Visit?

Remember how scared you
were in the emergency room?

Well, you won't be with us.

I'm fine here.

But I do need you.

Steve and I both do.

Please, Janet,

think of what's
best for the child:

raising your baby with
us, or alone with him.

She said no.

Think about it.

Hey, you two!

Thought I told you to place
those calls to room 701.

We did.

You didn't get one, did you?

Oh, did I get one? No.

I got eight.

You know what this means.

War.

Yeah.

Get your stuff.

We're leaving.

Hey, what's going on?

I got fired!

Fired? Hector, wh-why?

Because Mrs. Haverhill
found two large crabs

in her bathtub this morning.

We're just trying
to keep 'em alive.

Yeah, listen, Hector, I put
these guys up to it, okay?

I will take responsibility,

and I will take care
of old Mrs. Haverhill.

I'll send her up some schnapps.

Dylan, this is a hotel,

not a daycare center.

I know, but listen,
as a favor to me,

I'm asking you,

please don't do this.

I'm sorry, but I have no choice.

Oh, come... Hector!

Noah said the cases
are waiting inside.

Wait! We'll help you.

Figure out what else
we need for the party.

Do roommate things. Whatever.

Roommate things?

Pedicures, collagen
treatments, mud masks.

I told him that I didn't
want to move in with him.

Well, at least your
boyfriend asked.

Noah just told me

he's gonna get his
own place. End of story.

What? Noah was the one
pushing to move in, before...

Before I went
temporarily insane.

Yeah, I know.

Well, is that what he said?

Because if it isn't,
don't assume.

Uh, it's...

Getting over this
hurdle is like our first test

since we've been back
together. We're failing miserably.

We can't commit,

but the ultimate adolescent
Steve Sanders is going

to be a father and a husband.

And we're throwing his
engagement party on the beach

in less than two hours.

We're really behind.

My point exactly.

Whoo-hoo!

That's it! Last remnants
of the beach party!

Look, I explained.

The "adopted sister" thing
just kinda popped out, okay?

Can you please just
run with it for the party?

I didn't realize you
were so ashamed of us.

I am proud of my family,

but Janet's parents
are completely uptight.

They're coming here
tonight to try and get her

to change her mind and move
back in with them, all right?

So for this evening, can
we just take a deep breath

and rise above, please?!

By lying.

Exactly!

Dad.

- Hey, son.
- I'm so glad you could make it.

Come on in.

Dad, look, this is
very important, okay?

I need you to focus.

- All right.
- See the woman

over my shoulder?

I sure do.

Is she single?

Dad, that's Karen, Mom's lover.

But for tonight, she's
my adopted sister, okay?

See, Janet's parents don't know

that Mom...

Your mother... my ex-wife...

has a lover named Karen?

Yeah, Dad, she's gay.

I thought you knew.

We could talk all
about that later,

but for now,

she's my adopted sister,
your daughter, okay?

Please, I'm begging you.
Please, please, please?

Fine, son.

It's your night.

Thanks, Dad.

But no wife of
mine was ever gay!

No, listen, you know what?

I don't want you to worry
about that woman getting fired

'cause her kids,
they're total nightmares.

Come on.

They were just
having a good time.

Yeah, in a juvenile
delinquent sort of way.

Dylan, Noah really
wanted to be here tonight.

Yeah? So why isn't he?

'Cause he's running your club.

Uh, you know, I'd
like a really strong dri...

Oh, do you have any
of those little umbrella...?

Do you think you could
relieve him for once?

Yeah, Donna,
I'll think about it.

Um, actually,

I'll just have some wine.

Tonight, please?

Could you fill it

all the way up, because
I'm really thirsty, please?

I'll tell you what. I'll
see what I can do.

Just a little more. Oh!

Oh, my God,

I'm so sorry!

Uh, do you want me to help you?

Spare me.

Sorry!

Don't let her guilt-trip you.

Yeah, I'm just not in much of
a luau kind of mood, anyway.

Oh, me neither.

These people give me a headache.

How did your mother
ever marry that man?

- Hey.
- Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Sosna, hello.

Hello, everybody.

And how's my baby girl tonight?

Oh, you must be the Sosnas.

I'm Rush Sanders,

Steve's dad.

How do you do?

My wife Michelle.

Michelle. This is
Karen, my daughter.

Uh, is Steve's mother here?

Pumpkin,

where's Mommy?

She's on location.

She's a wonderful actress.

She can fake anything.

Sis, Dad, look, poi!

I'll get it!

Hi. Can I help you?

I'm a special guest.

Is Rush Sanders here?

Trish!

- Rush, hi.
- You're here, huh?

Dad, who's your friend?

The entertainment.

What?

I thought it was
a bachelor party.

Thanks so much for coming,

but we're not gonna
need your services.

That's David Silver!

- Oh, uh...
- Hi.

I'm sorry. You are?

- This is, uh...
- Trish.

Our prospective nanny.

Promise me you'll keep looking.

David Silver, I recognize you!

Could you take this to Robyn?

I listen to your show,

and-and I've seen
your face around town.

- Yeah?
- Um, can I have your autograph?

- Yeah, yeah, sure.
- Great.

- So, how'd that third date go?
- You know,

I'm gonna need a
napkin or something.

No, no, no, sign here.

More poi, anyone?

You're not serious.

David, come on. Live a little.

So, the third date,
did you sleep with her?

Did you get some?

Come on!

Yeah, yeah, tons, all right?

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.

You could try to explain, but
what could you possibly say?

It's all just a phase.

Samantha's always
trying new things.

I can understand your
feeling of emasculation.

Mm-hmm, I bet you can.

Can you tell when a
woman fakes an orgasm?

Yes, absolutely.

That's not what Mom says.

I got something

you don't have.

Penis envy?

All right, that
does it! Come on!

You and me in bed right now!

Your father and your sister?!

Come on, Michelle.

Great.

Where's your coat?

Hold on a second.

I have a confession
to make. That woman?

She's not my sister.

It doesn't matter.
I've seen enough!

My mom's gay.

Karen is her lover.

Well, that changes everything.

We don't care
who your family is.

That is so not true.

You don't even know
me, and you judge me.

We know you run a gossip sheet.

It's garbage!

I work there, too, Dad.

You said it was
temporary, a lark.

Until you met him.

We only came here to
get you to move home.

You're wasting your time.

You're wasting our
daughter's potential.

Janet,

you're a smart girl.

You wanted grad school!

Have you noticed
that my life's gone

in a different direction, Daddy?

That I'm happy?

Do you even care?

Of course we do...

but you're throwing
your life away.

That's right, Dad, it's
my life and my choices.

Admit it, you're
not disappointed

in the man I've chosen,
you're disappointed in me.

You're right, we are.

Okay. I gotta get
to the club. Man!

Oh, um, well, don't go yet.

Wait just one second.

Now, we want
stripping, lap dancing;

anything the customer wants.

Hello.

Noah, listen, you better
be done with auditions.

Look, I need
another hour at least.

No, no, just listen to me.
Donna is guilt-tripping Dylan

about all the hours
you're putting in,

and he's on his way
down there right now.

I need another half an hour.

He's coming right now!

Well, stop him.

How?

I don't know. Use your head.

Improvise. Do something.

No, Noah, I... Hello?

Noah?

Um, my headache seems
to have disappeared.

Yeah, so did your clothes.

Oh... yeah.

Are you sure you
have to go to work?

Yeah.

Um, this looks
like a job for me.

Your parents want to
send you to grad school,

and I've got you digging
through celebrity trash.

Well, maybe I will
get my master's.

Are you afraid
that I won't be able

to take care of
you and the baby?

No, I'm not.

Well, I'm kinda scared

that if you choose
me over your family,

that you're gonna resent me.

My family's no
consolation prize.

It's my father that's
making me choose, okay?

Not you.

And then there's this culture
that I know nothing about.

You never speak Japanese.

I hardly know any.

Neither will your kid.

The worst part
about your family...

they have a point.

Well, thanks to an
anonymous donation,

we've reopened our
after-school program.

- Go on, go.
- Go!

Dylan, I got your message.

You said it was important.

Yes, it is important, Hector.

It's important for you to know

that the hotel will no longer be
functioning as a daycare center,

seeing as how this
place is open for business.

Does that mean I
could have my job back?

You know, I spoke with

old Mrs. Haverhill,

and she's, uh,
she's feeling no pain.

Please, Hector?

I suppose.

Thank you!

But I'm expecting some schnapps.

Oh, and some
schnapps you shall get.

You know, we could use
a guy like you around here.

No, I don't think so.

I'm not really very
good with kids.

Mmm, I don't know about that.

Trust me, I've been running
this place for two years now.

Kids only mess with
the grownups they like.

Well, if you'll excuse me.

Okay.

Thank you.

I won't disappoint you.

Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!

Boy, are you gonna get it.

Here we go.

Okay, we got the
answer to our problems.

Tails, I move out...

Heads, I do.

We need to talk.

Hey...

It just kills me that we're
gonna let a coin decide

what we're gonna do.

You mean what I'm gonna do.

Are we gonna talk about this?

'Cause I really want to.

Okay, what do you
want to talk about?

Us moving in together?

Maybe.

I mean...

we've already been
down that road before.

You said no.

I know.

I just... I freaked out when
we were looking for places.

It's a big decision.

Yeah, it is.

You know all that
stuff I said about liking

how and where I live?

Yeah, there was something
about mud masks, if I recall.

Part of me wants to
live with you so bad.

But?

I'm confused.

Steve and Janet
are getting married,

they're having a baby...

And how does that affect us?

I feel left behind.

And I don't want to
commit to living with you

just because I feel like
my life is passing me by.

Does that make any sense?

Well, you're 25 years old.

I feel a lot older than 25.

Well, I understand.

I know you do.

That's why I love you.

And I love you, too.

Now root for me,
because I hate packing.

Come on.

You ready?

Here we go.

Let's do it.

Noah and I are
moving in together.

Huh!

See...

heads, tails...

we win.

I want us to live together.

Are you sure?

Absolutely.

Congratulations.

Yeah, let's, uh, let's
go out and celebrate.

I have to go to work right now,

but we are gonna
celebrate when I get back.

You bet we are.

- See ya.
- All right.

Really, man?

Yeah, well...

Thank you all for coming.

Let's try this one
more time here.

We wanted to apologize

for all the mistakes we've made.

We're not proud

of the way we
behaved at the luau.

And we want you to know

we've considered your advice.

I know you think this
is a shotgun wedding.

I'm not holding a gun!

We've begged Janet
not to marry your son!

That's because you don't think
he's good enough for me, Dad.

Wait. Wait a minute.

Who are you, the
Emperor of Siam?

That's Thailand, by
the way, not Japan.

Well, you're in
America now, buddy.

Where we've lived and
done business for 43 years.

All right, stop
this, all right?!

Look, it's not
about race or class

or stupid things that
we've said and done.

It's about the fact that
Steve and I love each other

and we're getting married.

I would have
proposed, eventually.

Just so you know.

This baby... this baby's
just an added bonus.

So you can be happy for us

and be a part
of this child's life,

and you can share all the things

that you have to offer.

Or you could sit back
and wait and see if we fail.

It's your choice.

'Cause right now,

we have our own
family to think about.

Um...

You weren't gonna
tell me, were you?

About what?

About your
anonymous contribution

to the community center.

Oh, Hector, he ratted me out.

Hector's a rat.

He's proud, though.

Kiss me.

Lift your head.

Oh! Ooh!

Mmm.

You know, you don't,
you don't have to go.

That's a switch.

I'm a little slow on
the uptake, but I learn.

You know...

despite how hard
you try to hide it,

you can be a pretty great guy.

You know that?

Some of the time.

So, stay with me.

I can't.

Hey, what's up?

I feel like a pimp.

You look like a pimp.
Give me numbers.

Three grand and change.

Your half.

Whoa. My ha... my half?

Yeah, I'm doing
this for Donna, okay?

I know. That's so romantic.

I'm doing this for me. Me.

You didn't pick
up the phone, so...

No, I'm picking up...

selectively.

You know,

I'm just talking to you right
now because I'm curious.

Did we sleep
together again tonight?

Was it good for me, David,

hmm?

Yeah, we did.

And I was great.

Yeah.

Robyn,

I don't know why
I lied about that.

Because you're David Silver.

You shoot, you score, right?

Something like that.

You know, when I
was in high school,

I wasn't like I am now.

I never would have had

a radio guy with
a three-date rule.

I fell in love

with this girl, and I
actually waited years

before I slept with her.

David,

it's been a really long time
since I found somebody

that I could trust.

I gotta be honest with
you. You scare me.

Because when I see
you standing at my door,

I don't know which guy
you are standing there.

It's me.

Robyn, it's just me.

Whoever that is.

But you know, I gotta tell you,

that guy that you talk
about from high school...

Yeah.

That's the guy that I would
have liked to have met.