All language subtitles for Out.Of.The.Clear.Blue.Sky.2012.LIMITED.DVDRip.x264-BiPOLAR

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Out Of The Clear Blue Sky [2012]

If you came in early,
on certain days,

the clouds would sit below
the top of the building.

And I would describe it as a
Jack in the Beanstalk moment.

It would simply be
perfectly blue sky,

white puffy, pillowy
clouds below,

and the tip of the Empire
State Building sticking up.

Like Jack in
the Beanstalk.

Extraordinary.

I once called my
wife from the office,

I said: "Honey, what's
the weather like?"

She goes, "Sunny,
it's beautiful."

l said, "Take
the kids inside."

They were BBQing, I said,
"Bring everything inside,

it's gonna pour in
about live minutes."

She goes, "What are
you talking about?

There isn't a
cloud in the sky."

We saw the weather
from where we were.

And on windy days the
buildings would sway.

I remember the doors would
actually swing like a ship.

You'd go to the bathroom
and you'd see the

water splashing
around the toilet.

You heard the creaking and you
felt the building move.

Some people got
seasick up there.

Every day the
planes would fly by,

there was always two
guys in the office,

Mike Miller or
Phil Mastrandrea,

that always would say,
"Whoa! That was close."

They flew past.

And they flew closely enough
that you would take notice.

"Look at that!"

"You could only tell it
was raining because there

were rivulets running
along the windows,

you know, because you
would he in the clouds.

It never rained above us,
it only rained below."

September 11 was the
first day of my son,

Kyle's, kindergarten.

My cell phone rang and I
was thinking, "You know,

what could possibly he so
important to call me when

I'm at my son's
first day of school."

Iran down the stairs
and I got in the car.

He said, "We have
to get there."

lstarted following
lire trucks.

Cause they had the
lights and sirens on,

I could get
through traffic,

and I just tailed
them going downtown.

And I just
start saying,

"Let's just get there, you
know maybe they got out of

there, they know how
to get out of there.

Let's just get there.

Let's just get there.

And I'm calling them
and I'm looking up.

And he keeps saying,
"It's really had."

He keeps just saying
"It's really had,

it's really had."

A person who answered
the phone on the trading

floor at Cantor Fitzgerald
located near the top of

the World Trade
Center said,

"We're blanking dying"
when asked what was happening

and hung up.

There was screaming and
yelling in the background

and a follow-up call
was not answered.

First, the immediate
thing that I did was count

because I knew what
floor that they were on,

they were on, Mark and
Steven were on the 104th floor.

I remember looking at the
clock and seeing 9:00,

it turns to 9:01.

I dialed Steven
on his cell phone,

and he picks up.

And I go, "Steve,
it's Greg."

And he's like, "Greg?"

And I go, "Yeah,
I can hear you,

Steve are you OK?"

And he goes,
"Greg, I'm..."

And as soon as that,
everyone watched the

second plane hang in.

And the second plane
hit and exploded.

And I was listening to his
reaction as the plane hit,

and he just said, "Oh
my God, look at that."

And the phone went dead.

Now I'm at
the building,

so I just start
grabbing people.

"What floor were you on?

What floor were you on?

What floor were you on?"

I grabbed someone,
"What floor are you on?"

I shake them.

They said they were on the
92nd floor and that's when

we started hearing this
huge creaking sound,

and that coupled
with a jet engine.

And someone screamed out,
"Here comes another one!"

And I assumed that,
that it was a third jet

coming in low to wipe
us out on the ground.

I look hack over
my shoulder,

and there's a tornado
coming towards me.

It's as high as the sky,
and it's a black tornado

rolling towards me.

I'm bailed up and I'm
waiting for impact.

And I'm just
waiting to die.

I'm waiting, I'm saying
"When's it gonna come,

when's it gonna come?"

And I'm thinking,
"Shit, I was uptown,

I was line, I was alive,
and now I'm gonna die.

Son of a bitch I'm gonna
die I can't believe I'm

gonna die. Son of a bitch.
I'm gonna die."

Everything went silent,
and the building just

came down, and
everybody stopped.

Everybody stopped in their
tracks and just turned around.

Everybody was quiet.

It was so eerie, I
mean it was just,

really I felt like
the world stopped.

And down came
the building.

Came walking hack down
along the corridor to my

desk and I was just
looking into people's eyes

and I could say, "How
could this hare head thing

get worse right now?"

And I just looked over
to my desk and I go,

"Where's the South Tower?"

And they go,
"It collapsed."

And then I just said,
I looked at my clock,

and I said, "10
o'clock, 9:46."

And then I just was
staring at the building,

I just, you know, then,
then time was like this,

like that second
thing, click, click.

I mean I could hear it
in my ear just pounding.

And I'm watching,
and I'm watching.

I started thinking,
"Maybe I'm dead."

Maybe I'm already dead.

Like, you know,
I don't know.

So I, it's black, I
can't see my hand.

So I take my lingers to
see ill can see and I

poke myself in the eye.

I'm like, "Well, I must
he alive because I just

jammed my lingers into
my eyes and it hurts."

So I figured, "OK,
I must he alive.

I'm blind."

And
it got silent.

Not quiet, hut
absolute silence.

I guess all the
particulate matter in the

air absorbs all the sound
or something because I

thought I was deal too.

I could feel the air
around you, it's thick,

it's not air.

And I'm thinking,
"Don't breathe,

just don't breathe, don't
breathe, don't breathe."

Then I go (inhale
noise) "Gotta breathe,

gotta breathe."

One of the times that
I opened my eyes,

it wasn't black anymore,
it was dark grey,

I couldn't really
see anything.

But it wasn't black.

I could see now that
our building was still there.

Whoever was in
that building,

couldn't have
any air left.

And I thought I was
going to die outside.

You know that's one of
the things I was thinking.

I could've suffocated
to death outside,

I don't understand, how
could the world he black?

I'm outside.

I'm outside.

I'm outside.

So I just knew
they were all dead.

I just knew
everyone was dead.

You know Steve was
there in '93 they walked

down 104,105
stories in an hour.

And that's why I like,
kind of marked my clock.

I just kept thinking,
"They're gonna, you know,

walk down the stairs, I
think it takes like an

hour, they'll he
out in an hour."

You know, it would he OK.

They had enough time
to get out, you know,

there was 45 minutes
or something in there,

they must've gotten out,
I'm sure they got out.

And you know, now it's
just we have to wait.

Jimmy gets me to,
just aims me and says,

"Come on just
walk, just walk."

So we start walking and
we're just walking uptown.

Our building collapses.

You hear the huge
roar and rumble.

Jimmy and I just look at
each other and (shakes head).

You know, we didn't like
turn around and look at it

and sort of gasp
and say "Oh my God."

They had already died.

So the building had no
connection to me anymore.

So when the building
collapsed, just, just shrugged.

They were dead.

So I kept walking.

(sigh) I kept walking.

I don't think I thought
about my brother yet.

I mean I thought
about him,

but I was trying not to, I
was trying not to

put his name down.

We took out lawn chairs
and sat in the driveway

waiting for Danny to
pull up and we sat there,

and people, people brought
us Valiums and stuff

because, you know, we were
just like (shocked lace).

And I kept looking for
him On TV saying, "Oh,

he's gonna come out, I'm
gonna see him with ashes

all over, but he's
going to survive,

he'll he out there."

Gabriel's cleaning
the room downstairs,

goes "Steven's going to
need a place to recover

because he's gonna he..."

You know, so she's
just scrubbing,

you know like rubbing
the skin off her hands,

just scrubbing.

People were
just in denial.

Anything you
did, didn't work.

But you couldn't
sit still.

You know I came in,
I hugged my wile.

She was crying
hysterically.

So I told her
everyone was dead.

I thought
everyone was dead.

She said, "No
Steven was alive."

Howard was in, in
serious shock

and really lost it
over his brother.

Um, really.

'Cause when it hit him
it was like a, it was,

it was like someone
punched him hard.

I was like,
"Alright, Steve.

Everybody's dead.

What are we going to do?

We have to liquidate
the company.

I mean, I, (stuttering)
I don't know,

so maybe we can sell
the patents, we can...

All these people's money
and it's all probably gone."

And, had.

Bad.

And we have to go to a
thousand funerals, and,

so that's what I
was telling him,

and he was like, "Well
before we

liquidate the company
we should talk to Lee."

And I'm like, "Lee?"

He's like, "Yeah
Lee he's in London."

I was like, "OM London.

Oh London, yeah we have, that's
right we got people who live..."

I mean I think
when he said it,

I think it was news.

Like as in, "Oh,
Lee in London."

I guess it was a couple hours
and Steve Merkel called.

I said, "Thank God.

Are you OK?"

l said, "What's
going outliers?"

And he said, "It's,
it's not good at all."

And I said, "Howard?"

And he said,
"He's with me."

And I said,
"Anybody else?"

And he said,
"We don't know."

And I'm telling
Lee, "Alright look,

so we're going to have to
liquidate the company..."

And Lee's like, "Hell no,

we're not liquidating
this company."

He's in crisis mode.

We went, we went into
immediate survival mode.

So we have a business
conversation.

So like, half the business
conversation I'm helpful,

and half the business
conversation I start crying.

Someone would
call and say,

"I'm trying to find
out about my husband,

or I'm trying to find
out about my son,

or my brother, or sister,
or whatever it was."

We would just literally
he going from call to call

to call to call to call.

We started what we
called a sale list,

which was who's
alive, you know,

who do we know
who's alive.

Trying to figure
out who was alive,

in and of itself,
was a huge job.

I mean, we were
calling family members,

family members
were calling us.

I started calling everyone I
worked with, their wives.

"Have "you heard
from so and so,

have "you heard
from your husband,

have you heard
from your wife, you heard?"

The answers were
no. no. no. no. no.

You know, I sai-, alter
then I started calling

people from other
departments and the

answers were no, no, no.

And I stopped calling
alter about twenty calls,

because it was just,
you know, because like,

the answers
were consistent.

I remember the phone
ringing at 3 o'clock in

the morning and
I'm like "My GOG,

maybe it's
Steven calling."

I just reach,
down (mumbling),

grabbed the
phone, "Steven!"

And there's , and
there's a crying,

Elizabeth Jordan, "Jordo",
worked right next to Steven.

She's just, "Did Steve say
anything about Rob

on the phone?

Did Stu did he
say he was OK?

" I mean, we didn't,
no one knew then,

I mean people suspected,
but we were still

hoping upon hope.

2 o'clock in the
morning I start dialing

hospitals, just one
alter the other, saying,

"There has to
he a mistake,

he has to he in there."

I remember
being so afraid.

We were at Tina's,
I went to bed,

like midnight, 12:30,
and I woke up at 1:30

literally screaming,
heart wrenching,

like as soon as I woke
up, and saw that I was in

Johnny's house, I
re-..., it was real.

And I wanted to go hack to
sleep because I was

afraid to wake up again.

So I went outside on the
deck and I smoked probably

like, four packs of
cigarettes all the time.

I remember calling
my mother then.

And crying, like, it's
so cold, it was cold,

it was damp, and I
remember calling her like,

"It's so cold, if
they're alive, you know,

they're wet,
they're freezing.

I just stayed on the deck
all night long and I heard

a helicopter and my
brother Timmy could do

anything from anywhere.

I looked at the helicopter
and like, "That's him!

It's Timmy and Johnny,
they're going to land here.

OI course they're going
to come to Johnny's house.

Where else are
they gonna go?

OI course Timmy can
get a helicopter.

Timmy can do anything."

So I'm just watching
it, watching it,

hoping to God that it
would just land soon,

and they'd come home.

Obviously it never landed.

I bargained all night
with God, I'm like,

earlier that year I
had medical pro-u.

A medical catastrophe that
ended up in my having a

colostomy hag, which
was then the worst thing

that's ever happened
to me, and I said,

"I'll wear the colostomy
for the rest of my life,

just bring them hack."

Then I thought I
was being greedy.

Then I said, "Alright
just bring one hack,

I don't care which
one, just bring one."

And then I felt guilty
for Tina, like, "Well,

what if it's Timmy and
you're wishing for one?"

And I'm like, "Just
whichever one."

And then I said,
"Alright, if they can't,

if one comes back and they
have the survivor guilt

and it'll never he normal,
then take them both."

Just all night, making
all these bargains,

like "I'll do anything."

But it didn't work.

It was like [our in the
morning, just dazed o",

and I had a nightmare.

Watching a spider
make a web.

I'm just laying,
I can't move,

and I'm just watching.

Just making a web.

It's getting thicker,
and thicker, and thicker,

and like it's really,
really, really thick,

it completes itself.

And it's lull so
there's no more holes,

sort of like a blanket.

Comes down on my lace
and I wake up, "UM"

It was like, well, OK,
I'm not doing that again.

Sleep?

Nah, that's not somewhere
we're going any time again soon.

That wasn't it,
so that was it.

And then, uh, I woke up
and that's when Allison

thought we needed a
place to get together.

And I think I went to
sleep at 2 and I got a

phone call at 4, uh, and
it was Howard saying,

"Look, you know,
we're gonna,

Allison has this idea,
let's set up a crisis center.

I want you to set up
the crisis center.

I want you to go to the
Pierre Hotel

and have it set up."

And I remember waking
up the next morning and

just hoping that it was
not going to he real.

I was hoping I was going
to turn on the TV and

"It's going to he another
beautiful September day."

I turn on the TV and
they still got the cloud,

and I say, "Ugh".

1010 WINS reporter
Steve Kastenhaum.

Steve?

Steve Kastenhaum: Well,
Ralph, all over our area,

people are asking, "What
has become of their

unaccounted for loved
ones and friends?"

Myself included.

When I returned to my
apartment building last

night alter spending 10
hours in a disaster zone I

learned that the woman
who lives beneath me

never returned home.

This morning another
neighbor told me she

called that woman's
cellphone immediately

after the plane crashed
into one of the towers,

someone on the
105th floor,

at Cantor and Fitzgerald,
answered the call.

Woman: I called her
cellphone to see that she

was OK, because I thought
that she hadn't yet gotten

to work, and the cellphone,

someone you know
opened the line,

didn't say hello, I just
heard a lot of screaming,

people screaming, "Please
help us, please help us,

we're stuck here“

We're on the hundred
and fifth floor,

we can't get out."

Steve Kastenhaum: Then
the line went dead.

She watched moments later
in disbelief as one by

one, the Twin Towers
collapsed to the ground.

We have no idea what has
become of our

neighbor and friend.

We wonder, "Is she buried
alive beneath the rubble?

Did she get out of the
building before the

collapse?"

Or did she perish in
this horrible tragedy...

The time is now 8:30am.

Welcome to the Bond Market
Association Conference call.

The call will now begin.

Now joining the call
is Lehman Brothers.

Now joining the call
is JP Morgan Chase.

Morgan Stanley.

Now joining the call
is Bear Stearns.

Now joining is
Merrill Lynch.

When I entered
the phone call,

the operator announced,
"Howard Lutnick,

from Cantor Fitzgerald,
joins the call."

And I, I had really
expected a much more

personal response
from everyone.

I don't think anybody, I
don't think anybody even

said, "I'm sorry."

I think they just went
right into business.

I just remember very
well one of the guys from

Morgan Stanley being much
more concerned about our

competitor, BrokerTech,
than, than us.

And, and I remember that
no one really said much to us.

You know, maybe one person
said anything to us.

I mean, these guys
all knew our guys.

They were in the midst
of a business discussion.

There was already an
agenda about opening the

market and it had been
set without regard for our

ability to open or not.

They just made a
decision, they said, "Ola,

BrokerTech can open,"
which was our main

competitor, we should
open the bond markets,

which was on the 13th.

They could've easily have
opened it another day later.

It was crazy, the
city was frozen.

They could've
opened on a Monday,

it wouldn't make
any difference.

I don't think there was
any reason to open on

Thursday as
opposed to Monday,

other than the tremendous
push by our competitor who

saw this as a great
opportunity to profit from

the events of
September 11th.

It was a pretty
tough call.

You know, and then Howard
got on the phone with me

afterwards, and said,
"What do you think?"

l said, "Well,
what do I think?

There's only one thing we
can do, we gotta do it,

we gotta he ready,
we gotta he open."

We weren't up and
running and I guess we'd

be out of business.

And that would he that.

You kept getting
signs of hope.

Their names appeared
on the survivor list.

And then I
called up Cantor,

and I'm like basically
arguing with Cantor, like,

"But his name
is on the list."

Like, "Well, the
list isn't accurate."

"But isn't it better
to be on than off?"

Like, just give
me something.

One of my friends who
was a firefighter says he

saw the name
"Hellman" somewhere,

and they saw Steven
alive, on a stretcher.

Michael's name appeared
on a sale list.

People called us and his
name was on a sale list.

Somebody who I had met
through the whole first

day said that they found
my husband's name on some

list of somebody
who survived.

I mean it was just so
crazy, it was just, it wa-...

and your emotions,
you were going like,

“Whoom" “Bam”

You know, just like hack,
it was like you're getting

thrown back and forth.

Your husband's name
I know is Donald...

[simultaneously]
Donald Gavagan.

Two of the people that
supposedly are in Jersey

Hospitals, Mark
and Steven Colaio,

you know they were really
close all three of them,

so I'm hoping my husband
didn't have a wallet on

him and he is with
Mark and Steven.

One of our friends had
heard that Mark and Steven

Colaio were, uh, in a
hospital in New Jersey and

that 90 Cantor people were
in the burn unit in New Jersey.

So this went on
like Channel 7 News.

One was up as critically,
critically injured and the

other was up as, um,
you know just injured,

so we thought
they were alive.

My sister-in-law and I
completely hugged each other.

I remember us rollin-...

rolling on the floor, like
we couldn't believe they

were alive you know?

They were alive,
it's OK, my mom was,

my mom was so upset
that Mark, I think,

was in critical condition.

I was like,
"He'll he line.

They're alive, they're
alive, it's OK, it's OK."

I just remember
sitting at the desk.

We were all in
d-..., had a suite,

so it was all
different rooms,

we were all just sitting
at desks, calling.

I just thought that they
were alive, you know?

We had all these people,
all our friends and family

just dialing
hospitals for hours.

I remember going over to
help open up the crisis

center, not really
thinking that a whole lot

of people would be there.

The crowds just sorta
grew, and grew, and grew.

And then the place
was just mobbed.

It started
as a trickle,

a trickle became into
a flood of people.

We had 3000 people there?
At least.

I was making the
announcements.

We're trying to find out
who's at the hospitals,

we're trying to find
out who's still alive,

those missing persons
reports need to be filled out.

We need DNA, so you need
to get a comb or

a brush or toothbrush.

Originally
people, you know,

sort of showed up hoping
that there would be some

indication that their
loved one was alive.

People would ask you,
"Well, you worked there,

were you there that day?"

And then all of a sudden
you're telling your story

over and over and
then, you know, they,

they get a glimmer of
hope, and they'd think,

"Oh, you were upstairs,
so you made it down."

And I go, (stuttering)
yeah I go, "No,

I didn't make it down,
I was down already."

You know, so, I had
actually to modify my

story, actually, you know,
white lie so that way they

wouldn't get that glimmer
of hope in their eyes.

You'd see it everytime.

"You were upstairs?

Maybe some people
did make it."

People were
getting angry.

The crowd had
gotten upset.

They were like, "Why
aren't we hiring forklifts

and and cranes to go
down and lilt up the..."

And I'm trying to
answer the questions,

which you know, it's the,
"The authorities

are doing that."

Someone wanted some
information and

nobody had the information.

He just started yelling
at us saying, you know,

"You people, you don't
know what you're doing,

nobody can give me
any information."

He just got really,
really hostile and angry.

So I get a call from
Kent about 4 o'clock,

he says, "You gotta come
hack here, they're,

uh, it's like a riot.

You gotta come over,
you gotta come over."

We were trying to, to
get all the information

and people were like,
"Well how many exits were

there in the building
and I'm like, "Well,

I think there
were three exits."

And, "Why aren't
you doing more?

Why aren't you
down there."

It was so loud
in the room.

Then I spoke.

They were able to hear
me and I could hear them.

I could talk to the people
in that room because of Gary.

I knew it was Gary,
but I'm just me.

I didn't have anything
I could give them.

I didn't have any
information I could tell them.

I didn't have any news, no

one had told me anything
in the hospital.

So I talked.

I didn't, I didn't
have anything to say.

It's just unthinkable
that all these people

together could he gone.

And what makes
us carry on?

What makes us carry
on is to help them.

What else can we do?

What else can I do?

Danny from the, from
our equity group.

Great trader.

Big Carl.

Carl was a big guy.

Big Frank.

Big Frank, Frank
knew everybody.

Frank knew everybody.

So many people.

So many people.

[sobbing] Hi, Jeff, Jeff
Levine from our equity group.

I really think
I'm getting dizzy.

Michael Ford.
Hi Mike.

So many people
missing from this, too.

Timmy Coughlin,
Steven Roach.

700 people.

I got all the stage.

A thousand people
hugged me, talked to me.

I left with more energy
if that's what's going to

help me carry through
till tomorrow.

It wasn't a
matter of can I,

it was more of a matter
of I have to save the business.

You know?

What the hell else
was I going do?

I had to give
it all I had.

You know, for,
for everybody.

You really had an
incentive to work,

just the opposite,
I wanted to work.

You know?

I mean, it was my choice.

You know, I can sit home
and, you know and, and,

and, and you know,
just rot in this,

in this horrible thought,
or l can be productive.

You know, it does no one
good, myself or you know,

anyone else, you know,
who's going to count on us

to just keep them
going, to he home.

You know, what
choice did you have?

The whole concept of,
"If we don't get this up

and running , you know,
we can't do anything good,

we can't help
anybody," was,

was really
gaining momentum.

If you're going to help
the families of your

friends that you lost, you
have to have a business.

If the firm goes under,
how are we going to help them?

Sitting at my dining
room table, "Alright,

let's, let's see
what we've got."

You know,
"What's the plan?

What are we going to do?"

It's totally insane.

We sat down at Howard's
house with, you know,

with a number of his
surviving executives.

First thing we did was we
went over each department.

You know, who's
with us still?

It was bizarre.

There were departments
that were cleaned out.

Everyone was on
the desk that day,

everyone cleaned out.

25 people worked
on a desk,

24 of them were killed,
and one guy happened to be

lucky because he was at a
Monday night football game

in Denver the
night before.

Out of the trading desk,
we lost 135 of 140.

I'm the only one who's out
of the equity department office.

The department of 60, 70
guys and you have three

or four names left, and
unfortunately, you know,

you're sitting there,
"What do we do?"

You know, like,
it was just,

it's a conversation no one
would ever have in their life.

And no one
should, you know?

OK, go down the list.

First time I'm really
going down the list

with my eyes open.

You know, just division
alter division alter division.

Mortgage hacks,
everybody's dead.

You know, business
after business,

you got no choice, you
just have no choice.

We needed to borrow at
the end of Wednesday,

September 12th.

$70 billion dollars.

So the bank requests of me
that I sign over control

of the company in exchange
for their stepping in and

lending us $70
billion dollars.

Steven's there and he
discusses with them some

of the terms of
this document,

and so he brings me the
document and he goes,

"You know this is the
worst document I've ever

seen in my life.

You sign your name on
the bottom of this,

they own the company,
you have no rights."

"What do you think?"

He goes, "I think you
should sign 'cause,

'cause it's that
way anyway."

I remember trying to
put together a business

care package with
the fundamentals,

pens and paper,
and staplers.

John said to Bill
Long, he says, "OK,

we got to put together
a, uh, balance sheet."

And I remember Bill Long
took this big piece of oak

tag and he writes
down, you know,

"Cantor Fitzgerald".

He puts down "Assets"
and "Liabilities".

And he's sitting there and
he's looking at this piece

of paper, and he's
kinda like, "Well,

what do you write down?

Who knew?

"We had no accounting.

We had no operations.

We had no Human Resource.

We had no legal stall.

We had, we had no nothing.

We had no, we
had no anything.

We had a crash course in
teaching people how to

clear US Treasuries.

In London.

At night.

When you have 25,30
British guys trying to

figure out the US
Treasury market,

when they've never even
touched the US Treasury

market, in their whole
lives, of how it works,

and how it evolves, and
how the payment structures are.

We put up a couple of
whiteboards on the wall.

Um, we got a whiteboard,
a whiteboard marker and we

started writing down
everything we knew about

the US business.

Most of those guys had
a piece of knowledge.

We got more and
more Whiteboards.

We ended up with lots of
whiteboards and lots of lists.

All through that there

were bouts of complete
breakdown.

I could be arguing with
the best of the best in

terms of the clearing
process and tell them

they're all crazy, and
[stuttering] our money's

sale and this and
this and this,

and I would he in tears
maybe live minutes later,

you know just
bawling my eyes out.

I mean it was
survival mode.

Everyone just went
into overdrive.

The energy was intense.

It was makeshift desks,
makeshift workstations,

whatever PCs
we could find,

whatever workstations we
could get from various

places and we, we kinda
just slapped them all

together so we could
get people working.

Nothing was up.

That was all black.

I mean, it was turned off,
no computers inside of it.

And it was like rolling
out everything all

at the same day.

Hard to believe but
it's been just about 48

hours now since the world

as we know it
basically fell apart.

1010WINS reporter Al Jones
is hack at the scene

of the wreckage.

It literally takes
your breath away.

Al Jones: They're
digging inside,

still hoping to
find survivors,

they're getting
what they call...

This morning after
a moment of silence

commemorating
those who died,

the US financial markets
started trading bonds again.

When the markets
opened, on Thursday,

September the 13th, the
screens in every bank flicker.

And then come on.

You know, one of the
things is if you talk to

people in Wall
St., you'd say,

it was one of the happiest
things they'd ever seen.

You know, how
could Cantor,

which they all
knew was destroyed.

You know, when they
saw that flicker,

and then it came on.

They were like,
"Son of a gun!"

You know, and, they
were rooting for you.

They pulled it off

They pulled it o",
it's a miracle.

I mean literally to get
connected to keep the

trades in the
order of flow.

I don't think there was a
person around that thought

that we would turn the
switch on September the 13th.

I remember the emotion,
the emotion in

that room was enormous.

I mean, some people were
pretty tired and upset hut

it was a big plus for us
to see the trades start ticking.

There was a cheer
and then it...

the cheer was all in like
B seconds because then,

then it was total silence,
and everybody realized

that it's not the time and
the place to he cheering.

Some of the first
people I saw on the

trading floor this morning
were the Cantor Fitz

futures guys, Steve Loren
and Wes Trainer just to

name a few, uh, very,
it's just unbelievably

courageous that these were
some of the first people

on this trading floor.

Every morning I threw
up when I woke up and

started feeling
the day and, um,

so I was like
physically ill from it.

I couldn't take a shower
by my...you know, by myself.

Like I would have my
sister stand outside the

door because I just
couldn't he alone with my

thoughts for a second.

CNN was on, in my
room, 24 hours a day.

That was the last time I
saw my husband or had any

connection to him was
on this news channel.

And it was just something
that I felt like if,

when I turn it o" I'm
going to he turning him all.

You go through all the
motions, you witness it,

and you sort of say, "This
really can't be though,

this is so ridiculous,
this is so far fetched.

It cannot he.

It is too removed, it is
too unreal, to really he."

I remember Thursday I
was like getting

into a panic attack.

I was like, had a lix, I
needed, I needed to have,

I mean the pictures, I
was like, I threw them,

I rememher just throwing
them down on the table.

I needed to
watch him move,

I was just going
through video tapes,

putting them in.

Video tape: "Where
are you going?"

"We're going to
Disney World!"

"We're going to turn up
the volume boys and girls

(yells)" I needed to hear
him, I needed to see him.

I needed 3-D.

I didn't need
two dimensions,

I needed lull
blown, you know,

lull metal jacket
Steve. You know,

screaming and yelling and
moving and doing all that

stuff that he does.

I remember thinking, "I
do not know a day of my

life without my
brothers in it.

I'm the baby, I was
born into two brothers.

I don't have a life
before Timmy and Johnny."

They knew more about
me than my Mom does.

They knew secrets
my Mom doesn't know.

And nobody else
knows what they know.

My whole life
history was in them.

On the 13th I saw a
diagram of the building.

I went through timelines,
about how long it would

take to get down.

I went through that
over and over again.

I refined it.

I tried to he
realistic about it,

and every time I did, I
came to the conclusion

that it was possible for
them to have gotten down.

But they had no
way to get out.

And they had no way for
anyone to get to

them to get them out.

And that's unforgiveable.

This is an ABC News
Special Report.

There is no company to
the best of my knowledge

which has been more
profoundly affected than a

company called
Cantor Fitzgerald,

which does a huge amount
of the bond trading in the

United States.

A huge number of its
employees have been lost

and are still, have been
lost and or are still missing.

And earlier today, ABC's
Connie Chung sat down and

talked to the CEO
of that company.

Peter to some on Wall
St., Cantor Fitzgerald

sort of symbolizes
the devastation of the

terrorist attack.

It's going to be a
different kind of drive

then I have
ever had before.

It's not about my family,
I get to kiss my kids.

I get to kiss
my kids tonight.

But other people don't get
to kiss their kids and I

just have to help them.

There's only one reason
to he in business,

is because we have to make
our company be able to

take care of my
700 families.

700 families, I
have 700 families.

I just, I can't say it,
I can't say it without crying.

Howard Lutnick.

A personality, from Cantor
Fitzgerald, the CEO,

a man with 700 families
and a much, uh,

expanded family I would
think now that we have

seen him and shared
his tragedy with him.

Howard Lutnick, a
personality this country

will not forget.

Period.

That's how Howard was
thrust into the nation's

spotlight and
consciousness,

in the worst of ways,
just the worst of ways.

I'm just one hut
they're all 700,

there are so many of them.

I'm missing 700
families, 700 people.

The picture of me crying
became omnipresent.

I had not intended to cry.

But I couldn't think about
all those laces without crying.

So, I hadn't intended
to cry hut, uh,

it wasn't up to me.

I wasn't in control.

He became the face
of this tragedy.

He made it very real.

That this was, that this
was a faceless corporate

tragedy and he
made it human.

And it now, it
now had a lace.

And that lace was his.

Everyone knew who he was,
all across the nation.

The letters
came pouring in,

people would stop him on
the street and thank him.

I was devastated this
morning before we came on

I was sitting downstairs
watching a tape of um,

and you may have
seen it, the uhm,

president of Cantor
Fitzgerald, the CEO...

I saw it...

Oh my goodness.

Yeah, I saw it.

Oh my goodness.

I saw it.

His entire firm,
everybody who worked in

his office, every single
one who worked in his

office on the four
floors, from 101 to 105...

Right...

Every single individual
with his firm...

Gone.

Is gone.

Gone.

Yeah...

His entire office,
everybody, everybody.

I mean, I watched this
guy tell his story and it

just, it just ripped me
up, I couldn't handle it,

couldn't handle it.

The chartered papers for
the Cantor Fitzgerald

Relief Fund went in on
the 14th of September.

It was emergency aid and
assistance on every level

we could think of.

First and foremost,
financial.

Second, second, and
equally as important

emotional support.

The overwhelming mission
was to create a sense of

community for
our families.

And so that's
where we focused,

and we pulled
everybody in and said,

"You are now our family."

l thought maybe
I would, uhm,

tell you a little story.

Maybe a little personal.

When I was 16 my mother
passed away of cancer.

And so I started Haverford
college as Tom said on the

advice of my father
who was a professor of history.

It so happens, that uhm,
and I didn't know it at

the time, but when
I started Haverford,

my lather had lung cancer.

But he hadn't, he
hadn't told me.

And so I entered college
and for my first week,

and uhm, through
complications through his

chemotherapy which was
experimental at the time,

uhm, he went in for his
second chemotherapy shot

and uhm, he died on
the table that day.

Our parents
died very young.

The three of us had nobody
but each other from the

time that, you
know, I was 19.

My extended
family pulled out,

you got these
teenage children,

you know sorta you get
involved, they get sticky.

You know they
might not leave.

And so they all sort
of stepped back.

My uncle says to me at
my father's funeral on

September the 14th,
"What are you doing for

Thanksgiving".

I'm like, (counts with
lingers), October,

"Oh this guy's asking me
for dinner in two

and a hall months."

You gotta he kidding me!

Like he didn't even
ask a question,

"What are you
doing tonight?

How about tomorrow?

What are you going
to do with the house?

How are you going
to eat dinner?"

You know, I had been in
the worst moment ever,

this sort of orphan, uh,
no family to rely on,

14 year old brother who
then moves in with me at

college while
I'm a freshman.

You know I had a 24
years and 364 day rally.

$0 I knew.

It smelled like it.

It felt like it.

It tasted like it.

I mean I was just
hack there, wham.

I never thought that I
was responsible for their

deaths, but I was-u.

Being responsible means
being responsible to help.

I had a responsibility
to help.

Maybe it was because
nobody helped us,

that I wanted to help.

That I wanted to
do what I thought,

what I thought was right.

What I would've
wanted done for me.

Good morning and
welcome hack to greatest

market on the
face of the Earth.

Today America goes
hack to business.

Our heroes will now
open the marketplace.

The green button.

And they're up
in the distance.

Goodbye Halo...

Have you ever been
to a horse race?

Gates open and
[pew!]

They all run out
at the same time?

That's what it was like.

Sway now takes
the lead...

We were just hired 35
people over the weekend

they come in on Monday,
it's the first day,

we're not in our offices,
we're not having our

systems, everything
is handwritten.

We're writing
everything by hand,

we didn't have electronic
communications to the

Stock Exchange floor, the
phones were going out,

people were on cellphones
with floor brokers.

People write it down,
they write on a napkin,

you bought 150,000
shares of XYZ,

then what are they going
to do with the napkin?

So they call someone up
who just joined the firm

and they say, "Here".

The person takes the
napkin and does what with it?

Lay on his third...

I had some stressful
moments on the trading

desk in my life, but never
like, where I'm like,

"Oh my God, it's just so
much I can't handle it."

Clients would call
up and say, "Hi,

we want to help you, we're
doing all our business

with you today.

The stock market is
opening and we're

doing it all with you."

And we're like, "No, no,
no, we can't handle it,

we don't...nol"

I think it was a woman
who called client that

Phil's had said, "But
you don't understand,

I have to do this.

I'm being told to do this.

We're doing our
business with you.

Everything."

Throwing it at us because
they want to help.

What they really almost
did was almost killed us

because we were
so undermanned.

So I called Lee up, I
said, "Look, hail luster!

The water's pouring in!

We're gonna sink!

Bail luster, luster!"

Amazing amounts
of business,

more business than we had
ever done in a given day

pre-9/11, we were doing on
the day right alter 9/11.

You know the equity
department lost 145

people, everybody except
for the boss in New York,

virtually everybody was
killed and it just...they

did what they could.

So I went home that night,
having made it all the way

through to Monday
now, still surviving.

And Allison said,
"How'd it go?"

And I said, "We're done."

But not "We're done", you
know, with frustration,

with exasperation,
just, "We're done."

You know we've been
killed with kindness.

You know, we announced
that we were starving,

and everyone in the world
stuck a piece of

bread in our mouth.

We couldn't
possibly process it,

it's just not possible.

The feeling we had for
the first week was that

while we were going
through the motions the

fact was that the
patient was lost.

You know, the events
were clearly too much.

The business
couldn't survive.

Families of those who
worked at the World Trade

Center refused
to give up hope.

One man, George
Katsimatides,

has told me that he
will never give up.

He's hanging on to a
thread of a report that a

pregnant woman worked with
a man named "John" who was

George's brother, that
that man had a long last

name and somehow George
believes this will lead

him to his brother.

George Katsimatides: I've
gone to the crisis center

that Cantor
Fitzgerald has set up,

I plan on going
hack again today.

Uhm, you know, I
can't, I can't give up.

Well, it's been a week.

Some week.

I keep expecting this
to he something like the

Wizard of Oz,
where I'll wake up,

I'll wake up and it's
uh, and it's a dream.

It's a terrible dream.

It's a tough dream, hut
it's one that'll go away.

I can tell you what's new.

Uhm, I've heard the lire
department say that there

still remain caverns
beneath the Trade Center

so there is still a
possibility of hope for

those of you who want
to consider that a

possibility.

Someone asked, "Will
we get a paycheck?"

The answer is, "ll they're
not alive, on the 30th,

I doubt we'll be
able to pay them."

The question was could we
survive and pay them any longer?

And I didn't
think we could.

People were still
holding out hope that,

you know, somebody, that
their loved one might he

alive and it was for the
deliverance of the message

that, you know, your
loved one's dead.

And someone stood up and
said how dare you say that.

A lot of people felt
hurt and upset because

they weren't ready
to hear that.

You know, "You're saying
our family member is dead

before anyone else
has said that.

We don't have a body, we
don't have confirmation.

How could you say that?

And how could you act
on it by cutting off the pay?"

But Howard made the
decision to save the

company so they would
have a company left.

Wednesday, I'm
at the hank,

waiting for the computer
to collect all of the

pieces of Center's
exposure and bring it all

hack together and
say what it is.

It was shocking. The
company was going to stand.

The hank was going to sign
the company hack to me and

the partners of
Cantor Fitzgerald.

We had made it.

So then I went hack to my
house and we decided we're

going to give 25% of our
profits to the families

for the next 5 years and
cover their healthcare

for 10 years.

And then I went to
Joe Shea's funeral.

There was a
picture of Joe,

and right above it was
his brother, Danny.

So I started crying.

I couldn't stop crying.

I started
hyperventilating.

Walked out of the church,
sat on the stairs,

I'm sitting there
crying and heaving,

just water's pouring
down my lace.

Amy comes up to me and
pats me on the shoulder

and says, "Howard, come
on we've got to go,

I've arranged for you to
be on Larry King to talk

about what we're doing
for the families.

In 15 minutes."

This is CNN.

How's your firm going
to deal with all these

families and the like?

Can Americans help
you in any way?

Well, I'll tell you how
we've decided to deal with

it, uhm, my partners and
I we talked about it,

and we've decided that
what we're going to do is

we're going to give 25% of
the profits of the company

to the families of the
victims to try to take

care of them so they stay
part of our family and

that we can try to take
care of them with our company.

Because you see they
call me and say,

"How come you can't
pay my salary?

Why can't you pay
my husband's salary?

Other companies pay their
salary, why can't you?"

But you see I lost, I lost
everybody in the company

so I can't pay
their salary,

so they think we're
doing something wrong.

I can't pay
their salaries,

I don't have any money
to pay their salaries.

Can America help at all,
can people help Howard?

Well I guess, the
victims, all the families,

they're going to stay
in the Cantor family,

and they're going to
stay our partners,

and so every
business that we do,

they're going to get
25% of whatever we do.

Howard, I know how
difficult this has been,

I thank you, you have the
condolences of all of the

CNN family, and
everybody in the world.

Thank you.

Hang tough Howard.

Thanks.

God bless, you'll he
saying kaddish a longtime.

Forever I think.

I remember calling the
Monsignor of my Parish.

You know, uh, and
saying, look Monsignor,

cause my Mom, you know,
was that old school German.

We gotta have a service,
we can't just wait,

we gotta do something.

And I'm like, "Well,
what are we going to do?

We don't have anything
to have a service with.

What do we do,
have a service?"

And I called the-m

I go, Monsignor you know
we're a Roman Catholic

family, we don't
have a body,

we don't know if we ever
will get a body back.

What can we do?

It was really hard,
because they had found

Steven but they
hadn't found Mark.

You know we wanted
to do it together.

But it was also hard for
my in-laws because they

didn't want to
do anything.

I mean they wanted to have
a memorial for Mark but

they also wanted to try to
wait for you know

them to find him.

But I said, you know,
"It could never happen,

you don't know."

The sheer number of the
memorials was unbelievable.

The fact that there were
so many going on each day,

and that you actually had
to choose which memorials

you went to versus
other memorials.

You can't go to
all the funerals.

It's not humanly possible
because that means there

would be ten a day,
everyday, for 65 days.

There's only so
many hours in a day.

So people wanted to know
what time was available.

They wanted everyone
to he at their service.

And I remember going on
the website and looking.

It might've been
16 all at 10am.

Some at 10:30.

It was heartbreaking.

Stu Fraser's
brother-in-law died.

And his memorial was the
same time as my roommate

in college's brother.

One was in Westchester.

One was in Manhattan.

It was a real conflict.

I mean, I had two guys who
worked with me who were

being buried at
the same time.

Jersey and Long Island.

And you know, you
had to choose.

I mean the wives totally
understood, and it's,

you know, surreal I mean you had
to choose funerals?

I mean...

It was bizzare, meanwhile
you had to work too,

you had a job to do,
so like, you know,

in the morning you'd
he working and in the

afternoon you'd he
going to funerals.

You know, it's crazy.

There's one in
Long Island,

it was a guy who was a
really good friend of

yours, and one in
Connecticut at the same

time, but you can't go to
both of them, you know.

So, I mean, you're
sitting there,

you're sitting there
trying to decide,

"Whose funeral am
I going to go to?"

Going from one, to the
next to the next to the

point where I was, I know
the Eucharist by heart.

I knew all the memorial
services - Irish Catholic,

Roman Catholic,
Protestant, Jewish.

By the end of
the next month,

I could sing every
hymn at the church.

I've been to too
many funerals.

You know, more...

A lifetime's
worth already.

It's what we did
for, you know,

two and a hall months.

I had people come
up to me alter,

in various times, alter
the memorial service,

"Oh you're such
a strong person."

That's because they didn't
see me...dissolving.

Strong?

I wasn't strong, I
was falling apart.

Everything became
so inconsequential.

Part of what
happened that day is,

"it doesn't matter,
let's face it."

How focused can you he
when your raison d'etre

is, "Who cares?"

You know?

Whose mantra is that?

♪ Mine eyes have seen the
glory of the coming of ♪

♪ the Lord: He is trampling
out the vintage where the ♪

♪ grapes of wrath
are stored; ♪

♪ He hath loosed the fateful
lightning of His terrible ♪

♪ swift sword: His
truth is marching on. ♪

♪ Glory, glory, hallelujah! ♪

When Rudy Giuliani came
to speak at our first

memorial, he comes
up to me, he goes,

"Who are all these people,
I mean they just..."

He expected he would he
speaking at a memorial hut

he had no sense that what
could possibly have 5000

people there, and the
answer was you have 658

people who died and they
all have mothers and

fathers, sisters and
brothers, children,

friends, cousins,
grandparents, in laws,

and the widows all have
all of their friends.

And it was only just
a small part of them.

You know, in these
past three weeks,

we have felt more pain
and sadness than I think

collectively any of us
had ever thought we could bear.

I have tried to speak to
as many of you as I can

and I apologize for my
failings but I will try as

best I can, going forward
to make sure I stay

connected with all of you.

And not just now, but
for the rest of my life

because that is what
matters to me and that's

what matters to all of us.

When we were at
the memorial,

one of the widows, I
will not say her name,

Howard's talking and
she's just like, "Oh,

luck you" and
"You asshole".

Just out loud
screaming "Asshole!"

Because, about
the paychecks.

The day of our
memorial, October 1st,

the media ceases
to he positive.

There's an article in the
New York Times that quote

families saying, "Why
aren't they paying us

salary through the
end of the year?

We've not heard from them.

We don't know when he's
paying us our bonuses.

Can you trust the CEO?

I think not."

Two days alter the World
trade Center Attack,

Connie Chung brought you
one of the most

moving interviews.

Howard Lutnick, the CEO
of Cantor Fitzgerald,

sobbing on national
television.

It has been almost
a month since Howard

Lutnick's pain and anguish
transfixed a nation.

CEO Howard Lutnick made
the media rounds

and was very emotional.

Another story
may he unfolding.

Was all over the media
promising to take care of

his employees' families.

But now, many of those
families are feeling

anything but being
taken care of.

Lutnick was all over
national television saying

that he that would do
whatever he could for the

families of the
missing employees.

Well, it was about a week
later that those families

learned that all their
paychecks were going

to stop immediately.

But what happened alter
the cameras went all

turned into another story.

HL went on TV on this
program and said that he

was going to take care of
his employees' families.

How many of you feel
that he has done that?

How many of you feel that
he has not done that?

Three weeks alter
September 11th we're

getting , you know really,
our pants beaten in.

You know we were
like a giant pinata.

I mean they were just
swinging at us and we're

just getting pounded.

So we had this big wave
that we were on

top 01,0! sympathy.

And then, and then the
bad press came and we fell

down here and
we got crushed,

and we got crushed,
and we got crushed,

and crushed again.

I mean it became
something, something from,

something that you
could never imagine.

I get a list at
the end of the day.

There were 75 calls
from different media.

Every newspaper,
every radio station,

every television station,
every kind of show,

every kind of reporter.

ABC, NBC, CBS, you
know, cable television.

Why would he cry,
soh on television?

Are you suggesting that he
just turned on the tears?

Oh yeah.

Yeah.

Have you heard
from Mr. Lutnick.

No I haven't.

Not a word.

No I've called him and
there's been no phone callback.

Why would Lutnick so
publicly promise to

support the families one
minute and cut them all at

the knees the next?

Wall Street watchers say,
"That's the cutthroat

Howard Lutnick they know."

But I'm just the
saddest person in the

world and they
chose to he with me.

Not the caring and
generous CEO portrayed

on television.

It was like a sound, it
was like a vacuum sound,

that started with the NYT
article and then sort of

this sensational news
magazine journalists just

taking from us all the
support that we had had as

people just ran for the
hills because we

must he had people.

We were not an
organization that could he

embraced with open arms
alter that because it

looked like we
weren't clean.

There were some women,
and believe me I'm not

giving anybody a hard time
because God knows what

they were going through,
but you know they're going

on television saying how
they're not getting any

information, they're not
getting help from this and that.

You know, human resources
can't call you because

they're all dead.

We don't have a human
resources department.

You know, we don't have a
corporate communications

department, we don't have
an accounting department

to tell you what we think
your husband's check was

supposed to be
for the quarter.

We don't know.

You know, it was a, it
was a horrible thing.

There was a lot of
anger and suspicion and doubt.

People were just scared.

And they didn't know
what the future held,

they didn't know if they
you know count on Howard,

or count on Cantor.

People needed to locus
their anger in some

direction and Howard
became a great foil

for those people.

And our business
started evaporating.

I was getting calls all
night long from people in

Chicago saying,
uhm, "You know,

my best customer is
calling saying what

the heck is going on?

Are you reneging?

Has something happened?"

So you're getting the
phone calls from the

customers, "Are you
sure that, you know,

the money you're saying
you're going to give them

what you're going to give
them because I'm trying to

help out my friend's
family that I did business

with for ten years.

Are you sure you're not
going to screw them?"

The company was not
strong enough to take that

so the company
started you know,

tilting and the business
started dropping.

I really was starting to
lose faith that we would

actually be able to take
care of the families.

We were, the tide was
turning and it was turning

hard against us.

Lutnick owes the country
an explanation and

until he shows up
and gives it he is

questionable
in my opinion.

William Hudson
from Portland,

Oregon sent us this
note: "The callousness of

Howard Lutnick made
my blood boil."

Tiffany Towers of Los
Angeles: "Bill thank you

for exposing Lutnick
for what he is.

I made a significant
contribution to his fund.

I will not be taken again
by the likes of him.

Bill O'Reilly got
people to stop giving

to the relief fund.

I mean people were calling
the relief fund saying,

"Can I have my money hack.

You know, Howard Lutnick
is not helping the families."

They would call
up and say,

"Well I want
my money hack."

And I was like,
"Well that's nice,

which family would you
like me to take your $50 from?"

You know because
alter that the checks,

we had already
sent checks out.

The hate letters
started coming in to the office.

Sometimes I'd come into
the hotline and there's

like 50 messages from
the night before.

"Drop dead" and just
nasty, horrible things.

There would he faxes that
came in that were

just really awful.

Yeah like, "You should
be ashamed of yourself"

and "How dare you" and
"You're disgusting."

We started to get phone
messages from this

answering service, "Howard, you
should die in the next

terrorist attack" and then

the operator
would write like,

all these little symbols
for like curse words.

And then she put
in parenthesis,

"Sorry but I can't write
out these had words.

The man was
cursing at Howard."

The way that people
attacked him was

just phenomenal.

And you know it was him.

No one else, they
didn't attack Lee,

they didn't attack me,
they didn't attack you

know, Steven, they
didn't attack any of us.

It was all Howard.

I was getting poems
written that I should he killed.

That the next plane that
crashes should hit my house.

People threatening to
do harm to my family.

You know, lots of threats
on me personally, saying,

"You're the most
disgusting human

being on Earth."

l turned to
Howard and I said,

"We have to
change our number,

and we need to get
new door locks,

and we need window guards
on all the windows,

change every lock.

Child guard gates put on
all of the windows

in the basement."

And I was making my
house like a prison.

You know my wife was
freaked out to go outside.

She was afraid, we stopped
using the front

door of our home.

You know, only
go out the hack,

only have someone check
to make sure no one was

outside first, I
mean we were scared.

Scared.

When they had the
first town meeting,

I went there and Howard
was meeting people

as they came in.

Howard said 'Hi I'm
Howard and I uh,

I lost my brother Gary'
and I said 'I'm truly

sorry for your loss and
you have my condolences,

but' I said 'I lost both
my daughters and I've got

some tough
questions for you'.

We went in there and it
was definitely angry.

Everyone from the area
wanted to hear what

Howard had to say.

They were accusational.

It was an ugly start
to the meeting.

The first meeting
was very raw,

very raw with emotion,
people were lashing out

and a lot of them
didn't make sense.

Just...

I don't know, I thought
they were mad at him for living.

I wasn't welcome.

I was visiting their turf.

I was the...

you know, I was the enemy.

I remember one woman
'what are you going

to do for us?

You know, how are you
going to survive this you

lost everybody how can you
tell us that the firm is

going to be fine?'

Wait a minute, you said
you were going to do this

and nothing's happened I
haven't heard from

you so where is it?

You know, everybody's
thinking you're so

wonderful but you promised
us and it hasn't happened.

There was just anger,
so much anger it was

unbelievable, and so l
said 'you've just got to

listen to me and
they were, like,

yelling at me and it's
just, just listen.

The company's going to
pay for 10 years of your

healthcare.

It was...

silent.

It went from boisterous
to silent, like silent,

and I didn't know I
thought maybe someone was

going to throw something,
I had no idea whether that

was good or bad I just, I
just sort of stood there

and it was silent,
I was silent,

so I said it again.

And then one woman stood
up and started clapping",

and, and then everybody
started clapping,

and I guess it just dawned
anthem at that time that

I actually wasn't
out to hurt them.

And then we talked.

And I started by saying
that I'm going to stay

here until there's no
more questions to answer.

And when there's
no more questions,

then I'll leave, but I'm
not leaving until I'm

the last person standing.

They might
listen to him.

I heard a man who broke
down in his voice.

Who, uh was frustrated and
trying to do something and

this was what he could do.

I later realized he
promised too much too soon

[he was too last]
he couldn't,

he didn't have time
to follow through.

And I think also, I mean I
don't know about the

other people but that
was like October,

you're grieving, you know?

You're not thinking logically.

So then I start doing
this in every town.

I go to Long Island and I
have it in Manhattan and I

have it in Staten Island
and I do it in North

Jersey and South
Jersey and, uh,

in Queens and Connecticut,
we're doing it in

churches, we're
doing it in schools.

The next thing
that happened was,

I said 'I'll come hack'
and I don't think the

people in these towns ever
thought I was coming hack.

And two weeks later
I came hack again.

And we went
through it again.

And then the next set of
meetings and by the time

you come hack the
third time you know,

you get a lot of converts,
then you get people

talking to other people in
the community saying 'you

know you should go' they
say 'why would I go?'

'listen you know
you should go!'

and so the process began
and then Cantor Fitzgerald

was moving forward
with these families.

"We feel like we have
a family with us,

behind us" "Thank
you, what can I say?"

It's my honor.

"I appreciate it.

I thank you very much
for all your efforts.

Thank you so much,
really appreciate it."

Thanks a lot.

This is 1010WINS it is
Sunday December 30th,

I'm Brian Carey and
here's what's happening.

Huge crowds wait on line for the

Ground Zero viewing platform.

People lined up for almost
five city blocks to be the

first to view the World
Trade Center disaster

site, the platform can
hold about 400 people at a time.

From there visitors
can see the crater,

they can also buy World
Trade Center memorabilia

from street vendors, which
offends some people who

say it makes a circus out
of a sacred site

for so many people.

This could be a mailroom
for all you know

if you came in
off the street.

So where you can find a
desk is where you work,

so there's no such thing
as 'this department is in

here' there's eight
departments in here.

This hall served
for meeting rooms,

you might as
well film these,

because these are also
our meeting rooms.

We had temporary space,
and when you think of our

company having
the top, you know,

five floors of the
World Trade Center,

and now we have...

you know, it's just, uh,
a door at the end of the

hallway where someone
tapes the name

Cantor Fitzgerald and that's it.

There are two
desks here,

in that corner is the
credit derivatives group;

these fellas are doing
foreign exchange options,

not the best
of conditions.

People often ask 'how
are things at Cantor now

or, or what's it like?'

It's a hard
question to answer,

it's not normal because
the situation's just not normal.

And so while the rest of
the country moves on and

we "move on", it's just
always going to he there

and that's just the way
it's always going to he.

Up here I lost Fred,
and Doug, and Jell,

and Jonathon and
Dave and Glen,

seven out of
the eleven died.

Looking at them, you
know, having imaginary

conversations with them,
it's been very lonely,

it's been very difficult,
the losses feel so fresh.

They vanished, the
building crumbled,

but the people vanished.

Right?

We don't, I don't
even know how many,

if we found any parts
of them.

I dream about these guys
sometimes.

I have to
say, it comes up for me-.

It was on television
all the time;

they kept just showing
that plane going into the

building, you'd turn on
the television set and

you'd see those planes
hitting the building and

it was really like
watching your brothers get

murdered, over
and over again.

It was like being hit
with a sledgehammer

fifty times a day.

I was sitting next to a
guy, and he said to me,

something about 9/11 and
I guess he didn't know the

facts about me, I said
"yeah I lost my sister and

my nephew, and he turned
around and he said 'wow,

how cool is that, I
haven't met anyone.' and I

looked, I was mortified,
I was speechless.

I just remember this
one woman saying how it

looked beautiful, and
whether it was the towers

being hit or the
towers crumbling,

and I just remembered
thinking 'doesn't she get it?'

that maybe she shouldn't
he telling this to me.

It was one year ago
today, September 11,2001,

we lost our
husbands and wives,

brothers and sisters,
we lost our children,

we lost our great friends
and we lost so many of

our colleagues.

Together this group has
suffered unthinkable pain

and sadness, the loss
remains ever around us and

at times it certainly
feels overwhelming.

This nightmare, it just
can't he one year old, can it?

September 10, 2001 is
really a decade ago,

our old life is
a decade ago.

Hey man, how are you?

Can't believe
a year huh...

everything I read
about you guys. though.

We're trying our best.

You're doing
the right thing.

I wasn't going to
come out today,

but I came out for you,
for all you did for us.

And I thank you.

You know, when we go
hack to work every day,

you know, it's like you
being at home, you know,

we go hack to work
and then we look...

and they're not there.

And so we always
think of them.

It's never...

you know, we always
think of them.

We were going
along in one life,

and that life stopped,
and we have to change direction.

And we can't get
hack to that.

We now have to begin
a new life and it's,

it's a difficult
thing to do.

People need to see,
what's it like to he in

9/11, that's
what it means,

my second life has
started now, the new life,

the new life that
I didn't want,

that I didn't ask for,
but that I have to live.

And forgive me if I
screw, if I offend you,

or ill come o" the wrong
way but I'm trying to work

my way through this.

My husband said to me
that he wants the

Carolee he married, hack.

And I said 'she's gone,
she will never be back'.

We are not that same
person we used to he.

And that to him was oh
my God, you know, like,

she's messed up, I said
she's never coming hack.

Tonight we are going
to talk about victim

compensation; the events
of September 11th killed

our loved ones, okay?

Today is not
September 11th,

I'm sorry to talk about
this in such stark terms,

our loved ones
would've wanted,

if they had to die, God
forbid they had to die,

they would've all said
'if l have to die,

I want to take care
of you' We clearly

understood that the
victim's compensation

fund, um, was the
fundamental economic event

that would make the most
difference to these families.

Here's one of Ken
Feinberg's favorites: "my

job is to value life,
that's a hard job valuing

life" let me tell you something
about the value of life.

My brother's life was
infinitely valuable,

but no more so than
yours, or your husbands,

or your sons, or your
sons, or your fiancés.

Each and every one were
perfect and infinitely

priceless, invaluable,
for their life.

The Victim's
Compensation Fund was a

topic that those 658
voices could speak as one

and needed to
speak as one.

It was the most important
thing we were doing and

that's why it drove us...

and it drove us.

But what's important is
that you guys learn the

language to push hack,
'cause when he says I'm

valuing a life, 'you're
supposed to stand up and

say 'that is bull'
that's not for us to do,

but we can value earnings,
and now this is not a

tough thing, this is called a
[our letter word "math".

This is called math.

All he's supposed to do is
value the math, the math!

On September 11,2001, I
was nine months pregnant

with my daughter Danielle,
and now the dreaded

September 11, 2003
is here upon us.

It is strange
how on one hand,

time has stood still, and
on the other it forges ahead.

The way I measure time, is
how last my children are

growing, but for me, time
and the reality which I

clung to stopped
two years ago today.

We are all part
of a group,

which we would give
everything not to he a

part of, yet here we stand
united in our strength and

determined to go on with
our lives as best we can.

We were, the families
of those we lost,

and the employees of the
company in one instant,

we were all forced
together in the most

unnatural of circumstances
and today we proudly

gather, completely
united as one.

This is, some of
the larger bears.

We give out bears and beanies

and stuff at every
possible occasion.

Let's see, this is for a
thirteen year old girl,

these were just a little
bit too big to put into a bag.

Tonight this is
a special night,

it's Cantor Fitzgerald
night at the circus.

Five "year old girl
four year old boy!

Five "year old girl,
four year old boy.

Gotta love
it, thank you.

Thank you very much
for all you're doing.

Oh, it's our
pleasure...

How are you?

Thank you for
being so nice!

My concern is to fight
for those things that are

fundamentally important
to the families.

Did I ever think that this
would turn from emotional

and financial support for
my families to political

advocacy on behalf
of our families?

Uh, no. Never.

I'm Edie Lutnick I'm
with Cantor Fitzgerald,

the Cantor Fitzgerald
Relief Fund.

My phone rang off the hook
today from family members

absolutely aghast at the
concept of there being a

separate memorial for
policemen and firemen who

lost their lives and I am
here predominantly because

so many family members
requested that

I show up tonight and say that.

The families have
asked consistently and

repeatedly and have not
wavered from the fact that

they do not want any vehicular
traffic running across the site.

None of you have vehicular
traffic across your

loved ones' grave sites.

This is where they
lost their lives,

this is where the
remains were found.

To these family members,
this is in fact sacred

ground, so don't make
it a place that

these families do not
want to come.

The premise that ground
zero should he about

anything but 9/11
is so absurd.

This is America's
9/11 memorial.

What are we doing?

So what happens
live years later,

you have become a
community in the face of

insurmountable odds, it
takes a broken heart to

heal a broken heart and together
we work to heal that heart.

Thank you all for being
part of the Cantor family.

Somewhere over the last live
years, things changed.

When I would go to
the mothers' lunch,

to any of our gatherings,
when I'd see a friend of

yours on the street,
and they'd pat me on the

shoulder and say thank
you, something changed.

You became the extraordinary
team taking care of us.

And for that I am
eternally grateful.

I don't think the
Howard of today

is the same Howard of yesterday.

A hard-nosed businessman?

Yes.

But he had to deal with
a lot of adversity,

and what he tried to do
out of the adversity was

the best he could
by the families,

so, what's the complaint?

He's done everything
that he said he would do.

I don't have any
complaints at all.

Where do I go?

That way?

Hi guys!

The original design
was for the absence of

vertical structure that
you wanted because you

were dealing, you were
inverting the verticality

of the buildings into the
void of the pools so the

waterfall became the
downward motion rather

than the upward thrust
of the buildings.

The design really demands,
is that the water trickle

down both sides so
it's to suggest tears.

So it's like this?

Just like this.

Mayor Bloomherg
doesn't want to put the

floor, or the age,
obviously our view would

be, we would have wanted
more information about

each person to make them
more human rather than

just a name as a
name, you know, what,

who is Timothy
O'Brien, you know?

Do you know
how old he was?

Why the names aren't
listed with age and why

they don't denote,
uh, where they worked,

I can't understand,
I don't know.

Listing these names as
if they have no meaning

other than as a number
is not appropriate.

Michael Arad's primary
concern was that it look

nice, that it he
aesthetically pleasing,

and there is nothing in
the way that these names

are conveyed that tells
you that one person was

different from
another person.

It was like a flowing
panel of names,

we didn't want that.

We wanted our stories.

So, what I'm doing is, I
am attempting to arrange

the names in such a way
so that the relationships,

the actual meaningful
relationships between

these names is honored,
that they're next to one

another, that they're adjacent.

It looks like nothing, it
just looks like names laid

out but ill hit a
button here, right,

these lines show up, these lines
here represent relationships.

Brothers, brothers and sisters,
cousins, family friends,

people who have been friends
for 20 or 30 years.

This panel is
incredibly interwoven,

you can kind of see this almost
oats' cradle of relationships.

It was enormously
important to the families,

when they point to their
mother or their lather or

their child's name, that
they will be able to know

that that name is
carefully placed and that

everyone who surrounds
that person's name

mattered to
their loved one.

The city's mandate was
that they should appear

random; the city doesn't
want the wall to tell a story.

Each one of these
panels, it tells a story.

We've actually kind of
defeated what was the end game.

We haven't told one story,
we've told hundreds of

stories, right, so these
names" each one of these

panels is many,
many stories.

Danny comes down
to the bottom line,

Joe goes oven...

it must he a nightmare
that we will awaken from.

That someone will come and
I'll wake up and they'll

all be standing over me
and I'll he like 'boy,

that was some hump on the
head' but I know when that

day will he, its not yet
but when I die they'll all he

there and they'll say that was
one heck of a dream wasn't it?

...Edward L. Allegretto,

Joseph R. Allen,

Jane Ellen Eisler, Paul Barbara,

Mathew Burke,
Thomas Burke,

Mark J. Colaio,
Steven J. Colaio...

When I hear people
talking about how they're

going on vacation with
their family or even if

they're just going over to
their brother's house for

the night, I don't show
it at all but inside

something happens,
my stomach, uh,

right away I just go
there for a second like,

oh my God that
used to he me.

Joann Cregan,

Helen. P. Crawson,
Denis Edwards,

Lisa Egan, Samantha Egan...

Denial will never,
ever leave you,

if you are directly
affected by this.

It will never leave you
because you will always in

the course of the day
think that this could not

have happened.

This is not real, this
could not have happened.

John Grazioso, Timmy
Grazioso, Robert Hobson,

Marsha Hellman,
Steven G. Hellman...

Part of me died that day.

And part of him lives with me,

and I have to honor that.

And I don't know...

it's kinda like, so now
I kinda have to interwine

the two of us in me in one
reality and

that's not so easy sometimes,
that's the trick.

Michael P. Laport,

Steven LaManchia,

Rosanne P. Lang...

This is always going
to he public,

for the rest of our lives.

Every September 11th we're
going to be reminded of

this and unfortunately
our children and our

grandchildren are part
of history that we never

intended them
to be a part of.

Gary Lutnick,
Michael Edward McHugh Jr.,

John Armand Rea,
Daniel Shea and Joseph Shea,

David Silver, Kenneth A. Simon,

Sushil Selenki,
Rubin Solaris,

Anthony Tempesto, Stanley
Temple, Karl Valvo,

Kenneth W. VanArkin,

Adam S. White, James White...

Douglas B. Gardner...

Hi.. Michael, today is September
11, 2001, what is today?

Do you know Michael?

My first day of school.

Are you excited
to go to school?

Yeah!

Yeah, I am.

What is your
teacher's name?

Hi Julia, and when
do you start school?

Tomorrow?

Tomorrow.

And you know who
else is teaching?

Michael, someone who
taught "you first "year.

Zed!

You know who
Zed is, Julia?

You know who
Zed is, Michael?

Danielle! Danielle!
You're recording the ground.

[laughs] And then we're
going to go down these stairs,

so he careful.

I'm not gonna break my neck.

No, this is a good place to go-
[laughing] there you go.

Danielle, do you think
I need a shave?

I can't see.

What do you mean you can't see?

I can't tell.

Now I'm going to
zoom on your chin,

and see if you need
a shave.

Oh, yeah, now I can see it.
You need a shave.

Oh, ok.
[laughing]

We have to go up
and look at the ocean,

and the beach.

This will he very boring to watch.
It'll he very, very boring to watch.

In ten years' time
it won't be so boring. though!

That's right, that's correct.

Sort of a nice day, as you
can see it's cloudy.

We'll do this again
so next week,

when it's less cloudy.

Come on!

♪♪