All language subtitles for Keeping Up Appearances - 4x04 - The Commodore.DVD.en

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian Download
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,267 --> 00:00:05,367 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:40,467 --> 00:00:44,033 IF THE THORNCLIFFS CAN HAVE A LITTLE PLACE IN THE COUNTRY, 3 00:00:44,033 --> 00:00:47,834 WHY CAN'T WE? HMM? 4 00:00:47,834 --> 00:00:50,834 ( mumbles ) 5 00:00:50,834 --> 00:00:53,767 I AM A COUNTRY LOVER. YOU'RE A COUNTRY LOVER. 6 00:00:53,767 --> 00:00:56,901 NOT AT THIS TIME IN THE MORNING. 7 00:00:56,901 --> 00:00:59,801 I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A COUNTRY LOVER. 8 00:00:59,801 --> 00:01:04,267 SINCE WHEN? GRASS DOESN'T BEHAVE LIKE FITTED CARPET. 9 00:01:04,267 --> 00:01:07,200 YOU KNOW I LOVE THE COUNTRY. 10 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,100 WE GO ON PICNICS. 11 00:01:09,100 --> 00:01:12,234 ROYAL DOULTON 12 00:01:12,234 --> 00:01:14,634 AND THE SILVER TEAPOT. 13 00:01:14,634 --> 00:01:18,434 WE TAKE TABLES, CHAIRS, RUGS, 14 00:01:18,434 --> 00:01:20,434 I DON'T LIKE THE CREEPY-CRAWLIES, THOUGH. 15 00:01:20,434 --> 00:01:24,767 BUT WE'LL FIND SOMEWHERE CREEPY-CRAWLIE FREE. 16 00:01:24,767 --> 00:01:27,400 OH RICHARD, HOW EXCITING! 17 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:30,634 OUR OWN LITTLE PLACE IN THE COUNTRY! 18 00:01:30,634 --> 00:01:33,400 WELL, IF YOU WANT A FINANCIAL OPINION, 19 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:36,300 IT'LL HAVE TO BE VERY LITTLE. 20 00:01:38,267 --> 00:01:39,567 ( sighs ) AH-HH! 21 00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:43,000 ( groans ) OH-HH! 22 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,901 "LITTLE PLACE," 23 00:01:45,901 --> 00:01:49,534 I MEAN BIG ENOUGH FOR ENTERTAINING A FEW SELECT FRIENDS. 24 00:01:49,534 --> 00:01:52,133 I SHALL BRING CIVILIZATION 25 00:01:52,133 --> 00:01:54,534 TO A LITTLE RURAL CORNER. 26 00:01:54,534 --> 00:01:57,501 OH, RICHARD, I CAN SEE IT ALL NOW. 27 00:01:57,501 --> 00:01:59,901 MY PRUNE SURPRISE ONE-BITE CANAPE�S 28 00:01:59,901 --> 00:02:02,400 FOR COWHERDS AND SHEPHERDS. 29 00:02:05,234 --> 00:02:07,767 THEY'RE ALWAYS TALL AND HANDSOME-- 30 00:02:07,767 --> 00:02:12,167 ROMANTIC HEROES-- NEVER SHORT AND FAT. 31 00:02:12,167 --> 00:02:14,467 I'VE NEVER YET COME ACROSS A HEROINE 32 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:18,501 WHO'S FALLEN FOR ANYBODY SHORT AND FAT. 33 00:02:18,501 --> 00:02:22,100 IT'S A BIT UNFAIR, REALLY. PLUS IT TAKES NO ACCOUNT 34 00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:27,033 OF THE WEIRD SHAPES WE FEMALES ACTUALLY FALL FOR. 35 00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:30,601 ( groans ) 36 00:02:35,701 --> 00:02:38,834 I COULD DO WITH A BACON BUTTIE. 37 00:02:40,167 --> 00:02:42,501 MY MOTHER COULDN'T BELIEVE IT 38 00:02:42,501 --> 00:02:45,667 WHEN SHE SAW YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME. 39 00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:48,334 YOU WERE WAITING FOR ME AT THE GATE, 40 00:02:48,334 --> 00:02:52,767 AND SHE THOUGHT SOMEBODY HAD ABANDONED AN OLD VAN. ( giggles ) 41 00:02:55,667 --> 00:02:59,868 I AM GIVING UP THE HURLY-BURLY OF THE ROMANTIC JUNGLE. 42 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:05,434 I AM RETIRING FROM AN ACTIVE LOVE LIFE. 43 00:03:05,434 --> 00:03:07,701 OVERACTIVE! 44 00:03:07,701 --> 00:03:09,901 BOG-OFF, ONSLOW! 45 00:03:09,901 --> 00:03:14,234 THAT'S NO WAY TO SPEAK TO AN OLD VAN. 46 00:03:14,234 --> 00:03:17,167 IT DIDN'T TAKE SO MUCH "STARTING" IN THOSE DAYS. 47 00:03:18,234 --> 00:03:20,534 OH, WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP AND LISTEN? 48 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:23,267 I'M GOING TO WRITE MY MEMOIRS. 49 00:03:25,334 --> 00:03:29,300 WELL, I COULD! EVERYBODY IS DOING IT THESE DAYS. 50 00:03:29,300 --> 00:03:32,234 AND I'VE KEPT DIARIES ALL THESE YEARS, 51 00:03:32,234 --> 00:03:34,000 I COULD WRITE MYMEMOIRS. 52 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:38,701 THAT'S GONNA BE GOOD NEWS FOR A FEW HUSBANDS AROUND HERE. 53 00:03:38,701 --> 00:03:41,901 THERE'S NO POINT IN WRITING IF YOU AREN'T GOING TO BE TRUTHFUL. 54 00:03:41,901 --> 00:03:45,300 THERE'S GONNA BE ONE HELL OF A LOT OF MEN MISSING THEIR LAST TRAINS. 55 00:03:46,634 --> 00:03:49,167 I HOPE THERE'LL BE ROOM IN YOUR MEMOIRS, OUR ROSE, 56 00:03:49,167 --> 00:03:52,067 FOR BOYFRIENDS WHO WERE SHORT AND FAT. 57 00:03:52,067 --> 00:03:56,334 I HAVE NEVER BEEN SHORT OF SHORT AND FAT. 58 00:03:56,334 --> 00:03:59,968 WHEN YOU GET TO MY AGE, THERE'S A BIG UPSURGE IN SHORT AND FAT. 59 00:03:59,968 --> 00:04:02,734 * HOW MANY GENTLE FLOWERS GROW * 60 00:04:02,734 --> 00:04:06,667 * IN AN ENGLISH COUNTRY GARDEN? * 61 00:04:06,667 --> 00:04:08,634 * LA-LA-LA LA-LA-LA * 62 00:04:08,634 --> 00:04:10,367 * LA-LA-LA LA-LA... * 63 00:04:10,367 --> 00:04:11,834 WOULD YOU LIKE THATCH? 64 00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:14,534 WELL, I USUALLY HAVE CORNFLAKES. 65 00:04:15,534 --> 00:04:17,868 RICHARD! PAY ATTENTION, DEAR. 66 00:04:17,868 --> 00:04:19,534 I'M SPEAKING OF OUR COTTAGE. 67 00:04:19,534 --> 00:04:22,167 SHOULD IT BE THATCH, DO YOU THINK? 68 00:04:22,167 --> 00:04:25,501 YOU MEAN AS WELL AS HEAVILY MORTGAGED? 69 00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:29,334 YOU'RE SERIOUS, THEN? 70 00:04:29,334 --> 00:04:32,934 I LIKE THE LOOK OF THATCH, BUT IS IT PRACTICAL? 71 00:04:32,934 --> 00:04:35,067 I MEAN, WHEN WE'RE ENTERTAINING, 72 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:37,901 AND I'VE LAID ONE OF MY ELEGANT EXECUTIVE TABLES, 73 00:04:37,901 --> 00:04:40,067 THE LAST THING I WANT IS BITS OF STRAW 74 00:04:40,067 --> 00:04:42,934 FALLING INTO PEOPLE'S VICHYSSOISE. 75 00:04:42,934 --> 00:04:47,767 EXECUTIVE ENTERTAINING! THAT'S MORE LIKE YOU, HYACINTH. 76 00:04:47,767 --> 00:04:50,000 WE'RE NOT REALLY COUNTRY MATERIAL. 77 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,033 OH, NONSENSE, DEAR. 78 00:04:52,033 --> 00:04:54,234 I SHALL DEVELOP A COUNTRY VERSION 79 00:04:54,234 --> 00:04:57,000 OF MY CANDLELIGHT SUPPERS. 80 00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:01,100 A SORT OF "PLOWMAN'S SOIRE�E." 81 00:05:04,734 --> 00:05:08,133 ( warbling ) * TO BE A FARMER'S BULL * 82 00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:12,000 * TO BE A FARMER'S BU-- * RICHARD! 83 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,901 ( mutters ) 84 00:05:16,434 --> 00:05:18,300 ( door bangs ) 85 00:05:22,067 --> 00:05:24,534 MORNING,EMMET! 86 00:05:25,934 --> 00:05:28,267 BEAU-TIFUL DAY! 87 00:05:28,267 --> 00:05:32,100 ( yodeling ) 88 00:05:34,934 --> 00:05:37,367 THAT VOICE RIPS STRAIGHT THROUGH ME. 89 00:05:37,367 --> 00:05:40,734 SHE COULD REMOVE PEOPLE'S SOCKS WITH A VOICE LIKE THAT. 90 00:05:43,834 --> 00:05:46,267 IS THIS HAT SUITABLE, DEAR? 91 00:05:46,267 --> 00:05:48,300 ER, FOR WHAT? 92 00:05:48,300 --> 00:05:50,701 FOR LOOKING AT COUNTRY COTTAGES. 93 00:05:52,067 --> 00:05:55,133 I MEAN, DOES IT LOOK "RURAL" IN A SOPHISTICATED WAY? 94 00:05:55,133 --> 00:05:58,667 - ER... - OR WOULD YOU WEAR THIS ONE? 95 00:05:58,667 --> 00:06:00,167 NO, IT WOULDN'T SUIT ME. 96 00:06:00,167 --> 00:06:04,400 DON'T BE SILLY, RICHARD. NOW CONCENTRATE. 97 00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:06,801 WHICH HAT? THIS? 98 00:06:07,801 --> 00:06:11,534 OR... THIS? 99 00:06:11,534 --> 00:06:15,234 HYACINTH, I HATE DECISIONS OF THIS MAGNITUDE 100 00:06:15,234 --> 00:06:17,734 FIRST THING IN THE MORNING. IT'S UNREASONABLE. 101 00:06:17,734 --> 00:06:19,601 YOU DON'T LIKE MY HATS. 102 00:06:19,601 --> 00:06:22,234 I NEVER SAID I DIDN'T LIKE YOUR HATS. 103 00:06:22,234 --> 00:06:24,400 RICHARD! 104 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:27,334 IS THIS THE FIRST CHINK IN OUR MARRIAGE? 105 00:06:29,300 --> 00:06:32,167 I'VE HEARD ABOUT MEN IN MID-LIFE CRISIS. 106 00:06:33,334 --> 00:06:35,367 I'M WARNING YOU, RICHARD-- 107 00:06:35,367 --> 00:06:38,734 I WILL NOT HAVE YOU BEING UNFAITHFUL TO MY HATS. 108 00:06:41,767 --> 00:06:45,467 NOW-- WHEN SHE RINGS-- 109 00:06:45,467 --> 00:06:48,033 IT'S JUST A QUESTION OF BEING QUITE FIRM 110 00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:50,434 AND GIVING HER MY EXCUSE. 111 00:06:51,601 --> 00:06:53,934 I'VE FORGOTTEN MY EXCUSE. 112 00:06:55,701 --> 00:06:57,901 "I'M SORRY, HYACINTH, 113 00:06:57,901 --> 00:07:00,267 BUT I CAN'T ENJOY COFFEE WITH YOU THIS MORNING, 114 00:07:00,267 --> 00:07:02,734 I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT WITH MY SOLICITOR." 115 00:07:02,734 --> 00:07:04,534 "CAN'T ENJOY COFFEE WITH YOU THIS MORNING, 116 00:07:04,534 --> 00:07:06,968 I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT WITH MY SOLICITOR." RIGHT. 117 00:07:09,267 --> 00:07:11,067 ( shakily ) "I'M SO SORRY, HYACINTH, 118 00:07:11,067 --> 00:07:13,734 BUT I CAN'T ENJOY COFFEE WITH YOU THIS MORNING. 119 00:07:13,734 --> 00:07:16,968 I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT WITH MY SOLICITOR." 120 00:07:16,968 --> 00:07:20,834 ( trilling ring ) 121 00:07:24,067 --> 00:07:26,067 HELLO? 122 00:07:26,067 --> 00:07:28,467 NO, NO, NO. I'M AFRAID I CAN'T. 123 00:07:28,467 --> 00:07:31,567 NO. NOT THIS MORNING. I'M SOLICITING. 124 00:07:35,734 --> 00:07:37,067 OH, NO! 125 00:07:37,067 --> 00:07:39,968 NO, NO. OF COURSE I'M NOT SOLICITING-- 126 00:07:39,968 --> 00:07:41,801 SORRY, YOU CAN'T WHAT? 127 00:07:41,801 --> 00:07:44,467 FOR COFFEE THIS MORNING, 128 00:07:44,467 --> 00:07:47,400 BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING TO LOOK AT PROPERTY? 129 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,734 YES, I UNDERSTAND. 130 00:07:50,734 --> 00:07:52,801 ( muffled giggle ) 131 00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:56,100 SOME OTHER TIME. 132 00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:58,234 HMM, THAT'S FINE. 133 00:07:59,534 --> 00:08:02,267 ( relieved laughter ) 134 00:08:04,267 --> 00:08:07,267 I WANT SOMETHING WITH ROSES AROUND THE DOOR. 135 00:08:07,267 --> 00:08:09,267 HMM... 136 00:08:09,267 --> 00:08:12,534 IT SHOULD CREATE AN IMPRESSION OF CHARM, TRANQUILITY... 137 00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:16,367 AND HAVE AN EXCLUSIVE POSTCODE. 138 00:08:16,367 --> 00:08:20,868 HMM? OH, AT LEAST THREE BEDROOMS. 139 00:08:20,868 --> 00:08:23,000 ABSOLUTE MINIMUM. 140 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:27,334 YES, AND IT SHOULD HAVE EVERY MOD-CON. 141 00:08:27,334 --> 00:08:30,667 YES, I SEE NO VIRTUE IN RUSTIC PLUMBING. 142 00:08:30,667 --> 00:08:33,000 HOW MUCH IS THAT ONE? 143 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,200 REALLY? 144 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:38,501 THAT SEEMS QUITE REASONABLE. 145 00:08:38,501 --> 00:08:40,501 OH, AND A SUNKEN GARDEN, 146 00:08:40,501 --> 00:08:42,767 AND A SOUTH FACING CONSERVATORY. 147 00:08:42,767 --> 00:08:45,300 VERY NICE. YES. 148 00:08:45,300 --> 00:08:47,567 NOW, THERE SHOULD BE-- 149 00:08:47,567 --> 00:08:51,801 THERE SHOULD BE AN L-SHAPED ROOM FOR ENTERTAINING, 150 00:08:51,801 --> 00:08:54,067 OBJETS D'ART. 151 00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:57,834 ISN'T THERE SOMETHING CHEAPER WE COULD CONVERT? 152 00:08:57,834 --> 00:09:02,634 SOMETHING A BIT RUNDOWN THAT NEEDS DOING UP-- LIKE ME? 153 00:09:02,634 --> 00:09:04,767 EXCUSE ME. 154 00:09:04,767 --> 00:09:07,033 RICHARD, ARE YOU LOSING YOUR NERVE? 155 00:09:07,033 --> 00:09:09,367 YES. IT'S GONE COMPLETELY. 156 00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:13,000 NO, NO. I'M STILL HERE. 157 00:09:18,334 --> 00:09:20,300 YOU KEEP HER BEAUTIFULLY, RICHARD. 158 00:09:20,300 --> 00:09:21,801 SHE DOESN'T THINK SO. 159 00:09:21,801 --> 00:09:23,801 SHE THINKS I'M IN MID-LIFE CRISIS. 160 00:09:23,801 --> 00:09:26,834 OH, THE CAR. 161 00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:32,234 YES, HYACINTH LIKES A CLEAN CAR. 162 00:09:32,234 --> 00:09:34,734 WHY DOES SHE THINK YOU'RE IN A MID-LIFE CRISIS? 163 00:09:34,734 --> 00:09:37,000 I FAILED THE HAT TEST THIS MORNING. 164 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,634 SHE ASKED ME WHICH ONE I PREFERRED. 165 00:09:39,834 --> 00:09:42,434 BEAUTIFUL DAY, ELIZABETH. 166 00:09:42,434 --> 00:09:44,234 YES, ISN'T IT? 167 00:09:44,234 --> 00:09:47,000 COMPLETELY CONDUCIVE TO CONTEMPLATING 168 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:49,634 COZY, CHARISMATIC, COUNTRY COTTAGES. 169 00:09:51,767 --> 00:09:53,434 COME ALONG, RICHARD. 170 00:09:53,434 --> 00:09:56,534 DON'T JUST STAND THERE HAVING YOUR MID-LIFE CRISIS. 171 00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:03,400 WATCH OUT FOR THE LORRY, DEAR. 172 00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:05,400 YES, I CAN SEE THE LORRY. 173 00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:07,701 AND THERE'S A PEDESTRIAN ON THE PAVEMENT. 174 00:10:07,701 --> 00:10:10,033 YES, THAT'S A GOOD PLACE FOR A PEDESTRIAN. 175 00:10:10,033 --> 00:10:12,033 HMM? 176 00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:15,300 AREN'T YOU GOING TOO QUICKLY? 177 00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:17,334 NO, I'M NOT GOING TOO QUICKLY. 178 00:10:17,334 --> 00:10:19,801 * ZIPPITY DO-DAH * 179 00:10:19,801 --> 00:10:21,801 * ZIPPITY-AY * 180 00:10:21,801 --> 00:10:25,567 * MY, OH MY-- WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY. * 181 00:10:25,567 --> 00:10:29,067 YOU REALLY ARE IN A MID-LIFE CRISIS. 182 00:10:29,067 --> 00:10:32,534 I KNEW IT WOULD HAPPEN ONE DAY. I'D BEEN EXPECTING IT. 183 00:10:32,534 --> 00:10:34,200 MIND THE BICYCLE. 184 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:38,501 MINDING THE BICYCLE. PASSING THE BICYCLE CAREFULLY... 185 00:10:38,501 --> 00:10:41,033 IN MID-LIFE CRISIS. 186 00:10:42,067 --> 00:10:44,400 WE SHALL FIGHT IT TOGETHER. 187 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,300 MID-LIFE CRISIS. 188 00:10:46,300 --> 00:10:48,968 I SHALL BE A TOWER OF STRENGTH FOR YOU. 189 00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:52,834 WATCH OUT FOR OTHER WOMEN. 190 00:10:52,834 --> 00:10:54,634 WHERE? WHERE? 191 00:10:54,634 --> 00:10:56,968 NOT HERE, DEAR. IN YOUR MID-LIFE CRISIS. 192 00:10:56,968 --> 00:10:59,501 IT'S A TIME WHEN MEN THINK OF OTHER WOMEN. 193 00:10:59,501 --> 00:11:01,601 NOT ME, HYACINTH. I ASSURE YOU. 194 00:11:01,601 --> 00:11:03,234 FOR ME... 195 00:11:03,234 --> 00:11:07,367 ONE WOMAN IS ENOUGH. 196 00:11:08,801 --> 00:11:10,934 THANK YOU, DEAR. 197 00:11:10,934 --> 00:11:14,300 BEAUTIFUL SENTIMENT. 198 00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:17,400 YOU SEE? YOU'RE GETTING BETTER ALREADY. 199 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:21,067 THINK FOR YOURSELF, RICHARD. 200 00:11:21,067 --> 00:11:23,634 TURN LEFT, HERE. 201 00:11:25,734 --> 00:11:27,934 ( melodramatic music playing on TV ) 202 00:11:30,334 --> 00:11:33,400 HOW DO YOU SPELL "MEMOIRS"? 203 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:34,634 woman on TV screams ) 204 00:11:34,634 --> 00:11:38,167 "M-E-M-O-I-R-S." 205 00:11:39,667 --> 00:11:43,501 AND I THOUGHT YOU WAS JUST A BIG IDLE SLOB. 206 00:11:43,501 --> 00:11:47,167 HE'S A BIG IDLE SLOB THAT CAN SPELL. 207 00:11:49,033 --> 00:11:51,934 YOU GET A WARM, COZY FEELING 208 00:11:51,934 --> 00:11:54,767 BEING MARRIED TO AN INTELLECTUAL. 209 00:11:58,167 --> 00:12:00,167 IF YOU WEREN'T BONE-IDLE, 210 00:12:00,167 --> 00:12:03,534 I BET YOU COULD HAVE REALLY MADE SOMETHING OF YOURSELF. 211 00:12:03,534 --> 00:12:06,834 YEAH, IF I HADN'T DECIDED TO BE BONE-IDLE. 212 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,934 ( screaming continues on TV ) 213 00:12:11,934 --> 00:12:14,367 IS SHE REALLY WRITING HER MEMOIRS? 214 00:12:14,367 --> 00:12:15,734 LOOKS LIKE IT. 215 00:12:16,801 --> 00:12:19,901 HOW DO YOU SPELL "VIRGIN"? 216 00:12:19,901 --> 00:12:21,667 IS IT "E-R" OR "I-R"? 217 00:12:21,667 --> 00:12:24,200 IS SHE GOING BACK THAT FAR? 218 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:30,801 OH, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL! 219 00:12:30,801 --> 00:12:34,634 I LIKE THAT ONE. ONE COULD ENTERTAIN THERE. 220 00:12:36,467 --> 00:12:39,534 HYACINTH, WE'RE LOOKING FOR A COUNTRY COTTAGE, 221 00:12:39,534 --> 00:12:41,701 SOMETHING SIMPLE WE CAN DO UP. 222 00:12:41,701 --> 00:12:43,734 YES, OF COURSE, DEAR. 223 00:12:43,734 --> 00:12:46,200 DON'T GET CARRIED AWAY. 224 00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,834 I'LL GO IN AND SEE WHAT THEY HAVE. 225 00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:51,801 YOU LOOK THROUGH THIS, DEAR. 226 00:12:51,801 --> 00:12:55,200 REMEMBER, SOMETHING SIMPLE WE CAN DO UP. 227 00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:58,100 I'M WELL AWARE OF WHAT WE WANT, RICHARD. 228 00:13:17,701 --> 00:13:19,701 OOH! 229 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:23,701 WONDERFUL! AND-- OH! 230 00:13:32,968 --> 00:13:36,234 WHY DO YOU ONLY GET THE DETAILS ON BIG HOUSES? 231 00:13:36,234 --> 00:13:38,801 LOOK, I AM NOT GOING INTO AN ESTATE AGENT'S 232 00:13:38,801 --> 00:13:41,534 TO MAKE INQUIRIES ABOUT SOME POTTY LITTLE PROPERTY. 233 00:13:41,534 --> 00:13:43,267 I HAVE MY PRIDE, RICHARD. 234 00:13:43,267 --> 00:13:45,167 THEN I'LL GO IN NEXT TIME. 235 00:13:45,167 --> 00:13:47,567 BUT MAKE SURE THERE'S ROOM FOR ENTERTAINING. 236 00:13:47,567 --> 00:13:49,434 WHATEVER SORT OF PROPERTY IT IS, 237 00:13:49,434 --> 00:13:52,100 I SHALL WANT IT TO BE A SHINING LIGHT OF CIVILIZATION 238 00:13:52,100 --> 00:13:53,634 IN THE RURAL WILDERNESS. 239 00:13:53,634 --> 00:13:56,467 MIND THAT HERD OF COWS, DEAR. 240 00:13:56,467 --> 00:14:00,267 - IT'S IN A FIELD. - THEY MAY BE DUE FOR MILKING. 241 00:14:00,267 --> 00:14:04,834 ( mimics cow ) MMM-MINDING THE COW-OOS. 242 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,734 Elizabeth humming ) 243 00:14:07,734 --> 00:14:09,767 IT'S ONLY ME! 244 00:14:11,133 --> 00:14:13,968 * DEE-DEE DEE-DEE-- * HELLO, BROTHER MINE! 245 00:14:13,968 --> 00:14:15,234 ( singing continues ) 246 00:14:15,234 --> 00:14:17,767 YOU'RE PARTICULARLY CHEERFUL. 247 00:14:17,767 --> 00:14:21,801 I'VE HAD A COFFEE-FREE MORNING-- NO HYACINTH. 248 00:14:21,801 --> 00:14:24,033 LUCKY YOU. HOW DID YOU WRANGLE THAT? 249 00:14:24,033 --> 00:14:27,667 I DIDN'T HAVE TO. SHE WAS GOING OUT-- LOOKING AT PROPERTY. 250 00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,734 ( bangs keys ) 251 00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:35,300 "LOOKING AT PROPERTY"? IS THAT WHAT SHE SAID? 252 00:14:35,300 --> 00:14:38,634 - I THINK THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID. - TRY TO REMEMBER! 253 00:14:38,634 --> 00:14:42,167 - YOU'RE SHAKING ME. - I'M SORRY, LIZ. 254 00:14:42,167 --> 00:14:45,734 BUT ARE YOU POSITIVE SHE SAID, "LOOKING AT PROPERTY"? 255 00:14:45,734 --> 00:14:47,501 HMM! 256 00:14:49,133 --> 00:14:53,701 THAT-- THAT MEANS SHE'S MOVING! 257 00:14:53,701 --> 00:14:56,968 HYACINTH IS MOVING! 258 00:14:56,968 --> 00:15:00,968 WELL, I ASSUMED IT WAS FOR SOMEBODY ELSE. SHE CAN'T BE MOVING. 259 00:15:00,968 --> 00:15:03,667 DON'T SAY THAT, LIZ. NOT EVEN IN JEST. 260 00:15:03,667 --> 00:15:09,300 YE GODS! HYACINTH MOVING. 261 00:15:09,300 --> 00:15:12,701 I THINK THAT CALLS FOR A LITTLE DRINKIE. 262 00:15:12,701 --> 00:15:15,467 * OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING * 263 00:15:15,467 --> 00:15:18,167 * OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY... * 264 00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:20,667 IN ABOUT AN HOUR, IF THAT'S CONVENIENT. 265 00:15:20,667 --> 00:15:22,868 GOOD! JUST A MOMENT. 266 00:15:22,868 --> 00:15:25,133 AND THE NAME IS...? 267 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:28,501 - B-U-- - "BOUQUET!" 268 00:15:29,634 --> 00:15:31,634 SPELLED "B-U-C-K-E-T." 269 00:15:31,634 --> 00:15:34,100 IT'S A MR. AND MRS. BUCKET. 270 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,901 "BOU-QUET." 271 00:15:38,901 --> 00:15:40,834 THAT'S CLOSE ENOUGH. 272 00:15:40,834 --> 00:15:42,734 THEY'LL BE WITH YOU IN ABOUT AN HOUR. 273 00:15:42,734 --> 00:15:45,234 DON'T WORRY ABOUT HOW THE NAME IS SPELLED. 274 00:15:45,234 --> 00:15:47,534 SHE'S WEARING A GREEN HAT. 275 00:15:47,534 --> 00:15:49,968 IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE WE CAN SHOW YOU? 276 00:15:49,968 --> 00:15:53,067 I'D LIKE PARTICULARS REGARDING THIS, PLEASE. 277 00:15:57,634 --> 00:16:00,133 LET'S JUST LOOK AT COTTAGES. 278 00:16:00,133 --> 00:16:02,367 THAT'S WHERE WE STARTED-- COTTAGES. 279 00:16:02,367 --> 00:16:05,367 "OUR OWN LITTLE PLACE IN THE COUNTRY," YOU SAID. 280 00:16:05,367 --> 00:16:08,100 I KNOW, BUT I WILL NOT HAVE THE AGENTS BELIEVING 281 00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:10,367 THAT'S ALL WE CAN AFFORD. 282 00:16:10,367 --> 00:16:12,934 OH, THIS ONE LOOKS MORE MODEST. 283 00:16:12,934 --> 00:16:15,334 IT DOESN'T LOOK MORE MODEST TO ME. 284 00:16:15,334 --> 00:16:18,000 - NONSENSE. MIND THE TREE, DEAR. - THE TREE? 285 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,434 I AM ON THE ROAD, THE TREE IS IN THE HEDGE. 286 00:16:20,434 --> 00:16:22,467 BUT IT COULD BLOW DOWN. 287 00:16:22,467 --> 00:16:24,834 THEY DO. THEY'RE ALWAYS BLOWING DOWN. 288 00:16:24,834 --> 00:16:27,634 MINDING THE TREE. 289 00:16:28,634 --> 00:16:30,834 ( birds chirping ) 290 00:16:31,868 --> 00:16:33,667 IT MAY SAY "TURN LEFT," 291 00:16:33,667 --> 00:16:36,667 BUT I CAN'T SEE THAT COTTAGE ANYWHERE. 292 00:16:38,701 --> 00:16:40,267 SHALL WE ASK THE VILLAGE IDIOT? 293 00:16:40,267 --> 00:16:42,267 THAT FELLOW? 294 00:16:42,267 --> 00:16:44,200 DO YOU REALLY THINK HE'S THE RIGHT PERSON TO ASK? 295 00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:45,801 THERE'S NO ONE ELSE. 296 00:16:49,100 --> 00:16:52,901 GOOD DAY TO YOU, MY GOOD MAN! 297 00:16:52,901 --> 00:16:54,167 COULD YOU DIRECT US? 298 00:16:54,167 --> 00:16:56,000 WE'RE LOOKING FOR "HONEYSUCKLE COTTAGE." 299 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,400 HAR...! 300 00:17:02,667 --> 00:17:05,567 I DON'T APPEAR TO BE GETTING THROUGH TO HIM, RICHARD. 301 00:17:05,567 --> 00:17:08,901 HE'S CLEARLY DONATED HIS VOCAL ORGANS TO MEDICAL RESEARCH. 302 00:17:08,901 --> 00:17:10,934 ( loudly ) CAN YOU TELL US 303 00:17:10,934 --> 00:17:14,501 WHERE WE CAN FIND "HONEYSUCKLE COTTAGE"? 304 00:17:14,501 --> 00:17:15,968 OH, AYE-- 305 00:17:15,968 --> 00:17:18,434 ( garbled speech ) 306 00:17:18,434 --> 00:17:20,567 GO STRAIGHT DOWN THE ROAD HERE... 307 00:17:20,567 --> 00:17:23,534 ( garbled ) ...TAKE THE ROAD AND COME TO A FORK! 308 00:17:23,534 --> 00:17:25,801 BUT DON'T TAKE THE RIGHT-HAND FORK-- 309 00:17:25,801 --> 00:17:28,167 OH, YOU DON'T WANT THE RIGHT-HAND FORK. IT GOES PAST THE PIG FARM. 310 00:17:28,167 --> 00:17:29,701 ( speech garbled ) 311 00:17:29,701 --> 00:17:31,601 LEFT-HAND FORK... 312 00:17:31,601 --> 00:17:34,300 YOU GO PAST THE FARM ON THE RIGHT-HAND SIDE 313 00:17:34,300 --> 00:17:36,400 ...FURTHER THAN THAT. 314 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:39,434 FIRST LEFT AND YOU'RE THERE. ( cackles ) 315 00:17:39,434 --> 00:17:41,267 I THINK I CAUGHT "FIRST LEFT." 316 00:17:42,501 --> 00:17:45,601 THEN FOR GOODNESS' SAKE, LET'S GO! 317 00:17:45,601 --> 00:17:47,200 THANK YOU! 318 00:17:51,868 --> 00:17:54,501 HE WAS LOOKING AT ME VERY ODDLY, RICHARD. 319 00:17:54,501 --> 00:17:57,400 DO YOU SUPPOSE THEY COULD STILL BE EATING RAW MEAT AROUND HERE? 320 00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,067 HYACINTH! 321 00:17:59,067 --> 00:18:02,534 BELIEVE ME, THOSE WERE NOT THE EYES OF A VEGETARIAN. 322 00:18:07,901 --> 00:18:10,067 WELL HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT FIRST LEFT. 323 00:18:10,067 --> 00:18:13,234 PROBABLY JUST A WILD GUESS. 324 00:18:13,234 --> 00:18:16,968 HE LOOKED A TRIFLE OFF THE LATCH TO ME. 325 00:18:16,968 --> 00:18:18,968 HE KNEW IT WAS FIRST LEFT, 326 00:18:18,968 --> 00:18:22,267 SO HE CAN'T BE COMPLETELY OFF THE LATCH. 327 00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:25,934 I'LL JUST PULL OFF THE ROAD. 328 00:18:25,934 --> 00:18:29,767 HE WAS JUST STARRING AT ME AND GRINNING. 329 00:18:29,767 --> 00:18:33,067 I DON'T SUPPOSE HE'S EVER SEEN A HAT LIKE MINE. 330 00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:43,167 I HOPE ALL COUNTRY PEOPLE AREN'T GOING TO BE LIKE THAT. 331 00:18:45,133 --> 00:18:48,501 IT WILL MAKE IT VERY HARD WORK AT MY "MERRIE ENGLAND" BARBEQUES. 332 00:18:49,934 --> 00:18:52,033 ( humming ) 333 00:18:57,734 --> 00:18:59,567 WE MUST GET A MAYPOLE, RICHARD. 334 00:18:59,567 --> 00:19:02,901 APPARENTLY THAT'S HOW COUNTRY FOLK AMUSE THEMSELVES. 335 00:19:02,901 --> 00:19:06,601 I DO LIKE THE NAME-- 336 00:19:06,601 --> 00:19:09,367 "HONEYSUCKLE COTTAGE." 337 00:19:09,367 --> 00:19:13,200 IT'LL LOOK RATHER WELL ON OUR EMBOSSED PERSONAL NOTEPAPER. 338 00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:16,701 YOU WANT MY OPINION? PRETTY BUT PRICEY. 339 00:19:16,701 --> 00:19:20,300 WE'LL SEND OUT INVITATIONS, RICHARD. 340 00:19:20,300 --> 00:19:24,133 "THE BOUQUETS WILL BE ENTERTAINING THIS WEEKEND 341 00:19:24,133 --> 00:19:27,667 AT 'HONEYSUCKLE COTTAGE.'" 342 00:19:28,834 --> 00:19:30,901 ( knocker taps ) 343 00:19:31,901 --> 00:19:35,400 OH YES, RICHARD, I LIKE IT. 344 00:19:37,701 --> 00:19:39,567 WHERE IS THE NEIGHBOR WITH THE KEY? 345 00:19:39,567 --> 00:19:41,734 APPARENTLY, HE JUST LIVES AROUND THE CORNER. 346 00:19:41,734 --> 00:19:44,634 WELL, COME ON, DEAR. COME ON. 347 00:19:59,501 --> 00:20:02,667 WHOOP! MIND YOUR TREAD, RICHARD. 348 00:20:02,667 --> 00:20:06,167 MINDING MY TREAD. 349 00:20:07,601 --> 00:20:09,300 ( bleating ) 350 00:20:12,834 --> 00:20:14,534 WHAT IS IT? 351 00:20:14,534 --> 00:20:16,868 IT'S A GOAT. 352 00:20:16,868 --> 00:20:20,801 YOU SEE HOW FAMILIAR YOU ARE WITH THE COUNTRY ALREADY? 353 00:20:20,801 --> 00:20:24,167 ARE THEY HOUSETRAINED? 354 00:20:24,167 --> 00:20:26,234 I SHOULDN'T THINK SO. 355 00:20:26,234 --> 00:20:29,067 OH-- JUST LIKE ONSLOW! 356 00:20:30,701 --> 00:20:32,834 ( goat brays ) 357 00:20:36,734 --> 00:20:38,901 ( gruff squealing ) 358 00:20:41,467 --> 00:20:45,634 RICHARD. RICHARD! RICHARD! 359 00:20:45,634 --> 00:20:47,934 ( frantic honking ) 360 00:21:00,234 --> 00:21:01,968 COME ALONG, RICHARD. THIS MUST BE IT. 361 00:21:01,968 --> 00:21:04,400 - OH-HH! - ( dog growls softly ) 362 00:21:06,501 --> 00:21:07,767 ( thumping ) 363 00:21:12,868 --> 00:21:16,167 THIS MAKES ONSLOW'S PLACE LOOK LIKE A PALACE. 364 00:21:28,434 --> 00:21:31,534 WHEN WE STOPPED IN THE CAR AND ASKED HIM DIRECTIONS, 365 00:21:31,534 --> 00:21:33,334 WHY DIDN'T HE TELL US HE HAD THE KEY? 366 00:21:33,334 --> 00:21:37,000 MAYBE HE DID. COULD YOU UNDERSTAND A WORD HE WAS SAYING? 367 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:40,234 I STILL CAN'T UNDERSTAND A WORD HE'S SAYING. 368 00:21:40,234 --> 00:21:42,234 ( speaking gibberish ) 369 00:21:43,234 --> 00:21:45,300 ...TERRIBLE-- WHOA-HO... 370 00:21:45,300 --> 00:21:46,868 ( gibberish continues ) ...RATS. 371 00:21:48,467 --> 00:21:51,100 - DID HE SAY RATS? - I THOUGHT HE SAID "RATS." 372 00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:53,767 I THOUGHT I HEARD "WOODWORM." 373 00:21:53,767 --> 00:21:56,000 CAN ONE HEAR WOODWORM? 374 00:21:56,000 --> 00:22:00,534 SAY"WOODWORM." 375 00:22:00,534 --> 00:22:02,534 I THINK YOU'D BETTER GO IN FIRST, RICHARD. 376 00:22:02,534 --> 00:22:05,434 INTO THE JAWS OF RATS AND WOODWORM. CHARMING! 377 00:22:05,434 --> 00:22:08,801 LET'S HOPE IT'S THE RATS WHO'VE GOT THE WOODWORM. 378 00:22:08,801 --> 00:22:10,534 DON'T BE SILLY, DEAR. 379 00:22:10,534 --> 00:22:13,667 - WOODWORM? - ( speaking gibberish ) 380 00:22:25,834 --> 00:22:30,267 OH, YES! ONE COULD DO SOMETHING WITH THIS. 381 00:22:30,267 --> 00:22:32,734 A LITTLE COTTAGE FURNITURE. 382 00:22:32,734 --> 00:22:36,334 IDEAL FOR MY COUNTRY CREAM TEAS. 383 00:22:38,701 --> 00:22:41,868 WE SHALL NEED A GRANDFATHER CLOCK, RICHARD. 384 00:22:41,868 --> 00:22:43,467 FOR CREAM TEAS? 385 00:22:43,467 --> 00:22:47,334 FOR THE AMBIANCE, RICHARD. 386 00:22:47,334 --> 00:22:50,834 OLD-WORLD ATMOSPHERE, DEAR. 387 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,501 YEAH, IT'S WOOD. 388 00:22:54,501 --> 00:22:57,601 WELL, NATURALLY. WHAT DID YOU EXPECT? 389 00:22:57,601 --> 00:23:00,901 BUT IT'S A PITY, IF THEY HAD BEEN PLASTIC, IT'D CONFUSED THE WOODWORM. 390 00:23:00,901 --> 00:23:03,033 HMM? 391 00:23:04,868 --> 00:23:06,801 HOW OLD IS THE PLACE? 392 00:23:06,801 --> 00:23:09,467 ( speaking gibberish ) 393 00:23:10,634 --> 00:23:12,667 ...1800, JANUARY. 394 00:23:15,634 --> 00:23:17,767 YOU TRY. 395 00:23:17,767 --> 00:23:21,067 LISTEN, JUST BECAUSE I RECOGNIZED A GOAT... 396 00:23:22,467 --> 00:23:23,901 SHE'S NOT HOME YET. 397 00:23:23,901 --> 00:23:26,701 THEY MAY HAVE FOUND SOMEWHERE. 398 00:23:26,701 --> 00:23:29,200 YOU'RE GETTING A THING ABOUT THIS. 399 00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:33,000 THEY PROBABLY WON'T FIND THE RIGHT PROPERTY AT THEIR FIRST ATTEMPT. 400 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:35,567 PEOPLE SHOULD MAKE UP THEIR MINDS. 401 00:23:35,567 --> 00:23:40,400 I DON'T SEE WHAT IS SO DIFFICULT ABOUT CHOOSING A PROPERTY. 402 00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:43,200 SHE IS LOOKING FOR A PROPERTY, ISN'T SHE? 403 00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:45,334 OH, EMMET. RELAX! 404 00:23:45,334 --> 00:23:49,300 HYACINTH SAID THEY WERE LOOKING AT PROPERTY. THAT'S ALL I CAN TELL YOU. 405 00:23:49,300 --> 00:23:52,567 IF SHE COMES BACK HERE WITHOUT FINDING A PROPERTY... 406 00:23:52,567 --> 00:23:54,701 THEN... 407 00:23:54,701 --> 00:23:57,334 THEN WE'LL HAVE TO HELP HER LOOK FOR SOMETHING. 408 00:23:57,334 --> 00:24:00,601 HOW CAN WE HELP HER? 409 00:24:00,601 --> 00:24:03,534 WE'LL CIRCULATE ESTATE AGENTS WITHIN A 50-MILE RADIUS. 410 00:24:03,534 --> 00:24:08,534 NO! NO, LET'S MAKE THAT A 100-MILE RADIUS. 411 00:24:09,767 --> 00:24:12,601 WE MUSTN'T MISS ANY OPPORTUNITY TO HELP. 412 00:24:12,601 --> 00:24:16,200 I MEAN, WHAT ARE NEIGHBORS FOR? 413 00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,200 EMMET, WE CAN'T DO THAT. 414 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,834 WE CAN'T INTERFERE WITH HYACINTH'S CHOICE. 415 00:24:20,834 --> 00:24:23,801 I COULD-- ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S IN SUCH A GOOD CAUSE. 416 00:24:24,801 --> 00:24:27,968 - WHAT GOOD CAUSE? - MY SANITY! 417 00:24:29,767 --> 00:24:32,300 OH, PLENTY OF CUPBOARD SPACE. 418 00:24:32,300 --> 00:24:35,534 I CAN'T SAY I AM FINDING ALL THAT MUCH SPACE. 419 00:24:35,534 --> 00:24:38,234 CAN'T-- CAN'T SEE ANY WOODWORM. 420 00:24:38,234 --> 00:24:41,100 THERE ARE MORE PROBLEMS AROUND HERE THAN WOODWORM, DEAR. 421 00:24:41,100 --> 00:24:43,567 ( speaking gibberish ) ...COLD IN HERE... 422 00:24:46,234 --> 00:24:50,033 - WHAT'S HE SAYING? - I DON'T KNOW, BUT I CAN FEEL EVERY SYLLABLE. 423 00:24:50,033 --> 00:24:52,033 EXCUSE ME! 424 00:24:54,434 --> 00:24:57,701 ( chuckling ) 425 00:24:57,701 --> 00:25:00,734 A FINE BIG LASS. 426 00:25:00,734 --> 00:25:02,934 WHERE? 427 00:25:05,601 --> 00:25:09,467 CHECK THE LOFT AREA CAREFULLY FOR PESTS, RICHARD. 428 00:25:09,467 --> 00:25:11,367 NOT MUCH LIGHT UP HERE. 429 00:25:11,367 --> 00:25:14,767 AND IF YOU SHOULD SEE ANY WOODWORM, 430 00:25:14,767 --> 00:25:18,334 TRY TO SHOO THEM TOWARDS THE END OF THE BUILDING. 431 00:25:18,334 --> 00:25:21,100 HOW DO YOU SHOO WOODWORM? 432 00:25:21,100 --> 00:25:25,234 INTIMIDATE THEM, DEAR, BY BANGING ON THEIR BEAMS. 433 00:25:25,234 --> 00:25:29,000 IT'S VERY DUSTY AND THERE'S NOT A LOT OF ROOM TO MOVE. 434 00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:30,434 REALLY? 435 00:25:30,434 --> 00:25:33,367 I'M A LITTLE RESTRICTED DOWN HERE! 436 00:25:33,367 --> 00:25:36,467 RICHARD, RICHARD, WOULD YOU COME DOWN, DEAR? 437 00:25:36,467 --> 00:25:37,901 - YES-- NOW! 438 00:25:37,901 --> 00:25:40,200 COMING! 439 00:25:41,834 --> 00:25:43,200 RICHARD! 440 00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:45,000 ( speaking gibberish ) 441 00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,501 ...AND FANCY SOCKS, TOO. 442 00:25:47,501 --> 00:25:49,334 WHOA! 443 00:25:49,334 --> 00:25:51,734 RICHARD! OOP! RICHARD! 444 00:25:51,734 --> 00:25:53,934 RICHARD! 445 00:25:56,601 --> 00:25:59,033 ( speaking rude gibberish ) 446 00:25:59,033 --> 00:26:02,834 HOW DARE YOU, SIR, TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME WHEN MY HUSBAND'S INCAPACITATED? 447 00:26:02,834 --> 00:26:06,200 - Man: OH, THE WIFE! 448 00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:09,434 ( speaking angry gibberish ) 449 00:26:09,434 --> 00:26:11,434 ...WELL, I'LL NOT STAND FOR IT. 450 00:26:11,434 --> 00:26:14,400 YOU AND YOUR FANCY WOMAN. THE OLD COW! 451 00:26:15,567 --> 00:26:17,567 Yokel's wife: ...YOUR LAST WARNING! 452 00:26:17,567 --> 00:26:20,868 YOU GO HOME! 453 00:26:20,868 --> 00:26:23,000 ( yelling continues ) 454 00:26:26,901 --> 00:26:29,634 HELP! HELP! 455 00:26:31,234 --> 00:26:36,501 RICHARD! DO STOP MESSING ABOUT UP THERE, AND COME DOWN AT ONCE, DEAR. 456 00:26:36,501 --> 00:26:38,434 I DON'T THINK THERE'S ANY WOODWORM IN THIS BEAM-- 457 00:26:38,434 --> 00:26:40,734 IT FEELS HARD ENOUGH. 458 00:26:40,734 --> 00:26:45,400 NOW LISTEN, I'M GOING TO LOCK MYSELF IN THE CAR. 459 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:47,501 THE WAY THAT YOKEL IS BEHAVING-- 460 00:26:47,501 --> 00:26:51,400 YOU'D THINK I WAS THE FIRST DELIRIOUS-- DESIRABLE WOMAN HE'S EVER SEEN. 461 00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:53,234 NOW, COME ALONG, DEAR. 462 00:26:53,234 --> 00:26:55,434 ( yells ) HYACINTH! 463 00:26:55,434 --> 00:26:58,467 ( yelling continues ) 464 00:27:10,968 --> 00:27:13,100 ( door slams, yelling stops ) 465 00:27:24,434 --> 00:27:26,534 ( cow bellows, Hyacinth screams ) 466 00:27:37,267 --> 00:27:41,467 RICHARD! HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE TO WALK LIKE THAT? 467 00:27:41,467 --> 00:27:43,801 ( sadly ) PROBABLY FOREVER. 468 00:27:48,968 --> 00:27:51,868 THIS IS NO TIME TO BE NURSING YOUR GRIEVANCES. 469 00:27:51,868 --> 00:27:55,968 IT'S FUNNY YOU SHOULD SAY THAT. OW-OO! 470 00:27:58,033 --> 00:28:00,267 ( all bleating ) 471 00:28:04,834 --> 00:28:06,934 RICHARD! 472 00:28:11,868 --> 00:28:15,334 ( theme music playing ) 0 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 34404

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.