All language subtitles for Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990) - S04E07 - Moving Targets (480p DVD x265 Panda)_track4_[eng]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ To live without your love ♪

You guys, let's just start
without her.

No!

If this is going to be our
official sorority meeting,

then we're gonna
do it right.

Here we go.

One for you
and one for you
and one for you.

And one for me.

Sorry I'm late.

New dress?

Oh, this old thing?

Well, it's not too
incredible or anything.

It was on sale
at Maxwell's.

And the best part
is that I bought it with
my very first paycheck.

Oh, working girl.

Yeah, well, I hope
he likes it.

He?

What, you mean she hasn't
told you about Stuart yet?

You're going out
with a guy named Stuart?

I know,

but you're gonna love him.

He's very sweet.

How did you meet him?

Actually, my father set us up.

Hold on.

We will get the dirt on this
and all other major matters

right after the meeting.

Well, how long does
a sorority meeting last?

Well, at the
Alpha House,

the secretary reads
the minutes.

Then there's old business,
new business,

then we adjourn the meeting

and we see who got pinned
or who lost their virginity.

Well, then I
hereby move

for this meeting
to be adjourned.

BOTH:
I second it.

Then it's unanimous.
Meeting adjourned.

So did anyone get pinned
or lose their virginity

over this weekend?

Well, now, Kelly, I lost my
virginity a couple years ago.

Well, I was just wondering
if you and Stuart

had taken a ride
on the roller-coaster yet?

No, but we're going
dancing again tonight,

so, uh, check back
with me tomorrow.

Andrea, let's face it,

we're the last
of the dying breed.

Well, from what I hear
from Brandon,

Andrea and her Dorm Advisor
are getting pretty chummy.

Dan's a nice guy.

BRENDA:
Is that it?

For now.

Get back to me at the end
of the semester.

Well, my love life
is a mess as usual.

I thought you liked
John Sears?

I do.

The timing just
couldn't be worse.

I mean, the night I break up
with Dylan, he gets carjacked.

Poor Dylan.

Well, at least
he wasn't hurt.

Well, I think he's feeling
a lot better today.

Why? Did you talk to him?

No, but Brandon did,
and I think they found his car.

♪ ♪

(bell rings)

(buzzer sounds)

You think you'll
recognize it, man?

You only had
the car a day.

Come on, Brandon,

how many 911s you figure
they got in this lot?

I don't know ten, 12.
It is L.A. after all.

What, you think
it's right here

under this sheet?

Damn it!

Just be thankful
this isn't your car.

It's a ugly car, man,
I'll tell you what.

It's like a nightmare
and it's getting worse.

Look, there's a cop
over by that shed.

He probably knows
something.
Right.

Excuse me, officer,

listen, I got a call
that said you found my car.

From who?
I don't know.

Some guy called and said
you recovered my Porsche.

No Porsches came in this week.

Are you sure, man?

Because the guy
called me up

and gave me the specific
serial number off the engine.

He said the car
was right here.

Let me see your registration.

Could it be in another
impound yard, maybe?

Seems there was
a little mistake, boys.

The car we recovered
was a Honda Civic.

Whoa, wait.
You're telling me

that I came down here to
this hellhole for nothing?

You don't even
have my car?

Sorry, there was a screw-up.

A screw-up?

From the police department,
I'm shocked.

Hey... Hey,
I'm talking to you!

Listen, he, uh, he got
carjacked a couple nights ago.

He's just not himself.

Yeah? Well, you tell your buddy
to cool it

before he gets
into some real trouble.

Yeah, I'll do my best. Thanks.

♪ ♪

What is so funny?

Nothing.
Everything.

I don't know.

Normally, I'm
a real sourpuss,

but when I'm with
you, I get giddy.

Well, I have that effect
on depressive types.

Oh, okay.

Thank you, Mr. Carson.

You know, you can
call me Stuart,

unless you still
hate my name.

No, I'm getting used to it,

but what if I call you
"Stewie"?

The last person who called me
that was my mother.

Ooh, scratch that.

What about "Stu"?

As in beef stew?

Well, it's meaty, it's hearty,
it sticks to your ribs.

Oh, that's not working
for you either, is it?

My father used to call me "Stu."

But then he developed
some other nicknames.

Like what?

When I dropped out of college,
he called me "The Bum."

When I was trying to promote
rock concerts

he called me "The Hippie."

When I tried to get into

commercial real estate,
he called me "The Fool."

I don't think you want to know
what he started calling me

when I tried to buy
into some racehorses. Oh, man.

I've never seen that side
of your father.

Well, his true personality
only comes out

when he's lecturing me.

How 'bout if I just call you
"Stuart"?

That's good.

Now could you whisper
that in my ear?

No.

(chuckles)

DAVID (on radio):
Hey, you night crawlers,
it's 2:00 A.M.

and time
for The David Silver Show.

Here's... David.

Andrea...

Andrea, it's getting late.

Mm... I was having the
most amazing dream.

Was there yogurt involved?

(both laugh)

No, we were flying.

It was great.

Only now, I don't
have the strength

to put my clothes on.

So stay.

No, I can't.

Stay...

I can't, I can't.
(laughs)

I stayed last night

and I almost missed
my first class.

You are not the most
dependable alarm clock.

Oh, I wish it didn't have
to be this way.

Today I was with my friends

and they kept talking
about their boyfriends.

I couldn't even say a word.

Andrea, we both agreed it's
for the best we don't go public.

Yeah, but it's not fair.

I mean, it's not like you're
my teacher anymore.

I looked at
the college

guidelines on Resident Advisors.

They do not have
a non-fraternization rule.

No, not specifically,

but how it's interpreted
is a whole other matter.

What's the worst thing
that could happen

if they find out about us?

Oh, I don't know,
and I don't want to know.

Do you?

Sleep well.

(frustrated groan)

Thanks.

Mm. Bye.

Invite me in?

What?

Invite... me... in.

Yeah, right, my parents
are probably inside waiting

with the lights turned down.

Good.

If they're up,
I'll just explain

why I can't bear
to live without you.

Stuart, I think
we better call it a night.

Easy for you,
I'm not letting you go.

What are you doing?
You cannot come in!

Fine, then it's settled.
You're coming back
to my place.

No, Stuart!

Shh, you'll wake
your parents.

Put me down.

Your wish is my command.

So...

did I sweep you off your feet?

(sighs):
Look, this is so good,

I don't think that we should
rock the boat.

I don't want to rock the boat.

I want to sink the boat.

Go!

(groans)

Brenda, we have to talk.

Uh... um, look, I know I'm late.

We just lost
track of time,

and I'm really sorry.

Uh, well, that's a start.

We have to lay down some
very clear rules, young lady.

I don't get it.
What's the problem?

I mean, I'm working.
I'm going to school.

You guys just go on
with your lives

and I promise, I'll be fine.

Brenda, this is
the third time this week

you've come in at 3:00 A.M.

Well, look at it this way.

Consider yourselves lucky
I came home at all.

Night.

Well, things are back to normal
at the old Walsh household.

Mom's talking to herself.

Dad's coming to me
for advice,

and you're back
in the old doghouse.

No, I'm one foot out the door.

So what's really going on
with you and Stuart?

What do you think's going on?

Oh, I don't know.

He's rich,
he's good-looking...

he's rich.

There's gotta be a catch.

You know, you're worse
than Mom and Dad.

Are you saying this guy's
all together?

Brandon, let me put it
to you this way.

There's never been anyone in my
life, including Dylan McKay,

who knows how to...

How to what?

I'm trying to find
the right word.

How to woo.

Stuart gives good woo?

Ooh, the best.

Well, in that case,

does he have a twin sister
who's as rich as he is?

And, look, if you've
done the reading, you don't

have to worry, you will not
fall below the Mendoza line

for a grade of C.

Yeah?

Um, the Mendoza line?

Was that in the chapters?

Mendoza line? No.

That's not in your reading,
will not be on the test.

So if there's nothing else, uh,
look, life is short, study hard.

Class dismissed.

Well, it looks like
I'm gonna be in all night

studying my notes.
You want to come over?

I don't think so, I'm not
gonna sweat this one.

Steve, you're going
to brick this test.

You're going to find yourself
below his Mendoza line,

whatever that is.
Uh, I don't think so.

You see, the KEG house has
this one-hour super cram,

guaranteed to bring you
up to speed on any exam.

One hour?

Yeah, hey, man,
I can let you in

on some of these frat
secrets if you'd like.

I think I'll stay away
from your shortcuts,

Mr. Legacy Key.

Mr. Begging Mrs. Teasley
to graduate.

Is this why
you took down

Professor Randall's
office hours?

Maybe you're planning on
sucking up a little bit, huh?

No, I'm not planning on
sucking up a little bit.

I just don't want to be
another face in the crowd.

There's nothing wrong
with personalizing

the student-teacher
relationship.

I read that somewhere.
I think it was Dante.

So in other words,
you are sucking up?

Gimme a break, will ya?

Between Brenda's undeclared war
on my parents

and Dylan's psychosis,
I don't know what's going on.

It' gotta be rough
getting your car jacked.
It's not only that.

Kelly tells him that she wants
to start dating other people

like an hour before
this kid sticks a gun
in his face, you know.

Don't tell anyone though,
it's top secret.

It's no secret
at the KEG house.

Everyone knows John Sears
is going out with her.

DYLAN:
So you figure if the insurance
company's willing to settle,

then there's not much chance
of ever finding it, am I right?

The claims officer said
that if a stolen vehicle

is not recovered
in the first 48 hours,

it's already at a chop shop,
or halfway down to Guadalajara.

I hate to admit it,
but you were right, Jim.

I shouldn't have bought
that car in the first place.

Well, you're covered
for a rental vehicle

until you want
to buy a new one.

Any idea what
you might want?

Oh, I don't know,
I was thinking maybe a tank,

urban assault vehicle,
that kind of thing.

Glad to see you still have
a sense of humor.

Is that what this is?

You know,

in a situation like that,

there's really nothing
you could have done.

Well, I don't know, Jim.

I mean, I could've jammed
through the light.

You know, I could've
honked my horn,

I could've backed up
and knocked the guy over

and I didn't do any
of those things, man, I froze.

I thought maybe
the kid was lost.

You know, then
he whips out this gun.

He's got the barrel
right in my face

and I'm looking down
that little hole.

I saw my whole life
in that hole,

but he didn't care.

He was ready to kill me

and there wasn't a damn thing
I could do about it.

You know, it might not
be such a bad idea

to get counseling.

It really helped Brenda.

Actually, I, uh...

I got something else in mind.

(gunfire)

Hey, you're good.

Dodge City,
you better be.

Mom, I told you, you cannot park
in the apartment manager's spot.

He told me it was okay.

Oh.
Hi, Jackie.

Hi, Donna.

You're doing
David's laundry again?

Why not?

It's the highlight
of my social life.

Oh, and I ordered pizza
for you guys.

One vegetarian
and one with pepperoni.

Well, thank you.

Wow, your mom
is so great.

Yeah, you don't have to listen
to her constant complaining

about how miserably
lonely she is

and how I never come to visit,

and how awful it is
sharing Erin with Mel.

It's enough
to drive me crazy.

Look who's here.

Hi, bubbelah.

Oh, Erin,

you are so precious.

Well, we're just
one big happy family.

One big, happy
dysfunctional family.

Don't listen to her.

She's a psych major.

RANDALL:
Oh, I understand,

but I'd rather
cut myself shaving

than watch the Clippers lose
from the nosebleed section.

But, no, I appreciate you
thinking of me, thanks.

All right, bye-bye.

How you doing?

Cory Randall.
You are...?

Brandon Walsh.
I'm in your class.

Nosebleed section.
Seat 125.

Great, great,
thanks for coming by.

I wish more of my students
would come by

and introduce themselves.
Why don't you have a seat?

Thanks.

So I take it
you're into sports, huh?

Yeah, why not?

By studying them,
I get a lot of free tickets.

I know what you mean.

I was the sports editor
on my high school newspaper.

Well, good, so you probably know
the origins of the Mendoza line.

Actually, I ran a check
on my computer last night

and came up empty.

Try the sports page.

So, what, you a little
uptight about this test?

No, not really.

But if you want to show me
an advance copy,

I wouldn't complain.

Brandon, you read
chapter two, right?

Sure.

You're already
in the Hall of Fame.

Hi, there.

Hi.

In the market for
a used Stairmaster?

Only if it steps two.

I really enjoyed last night.

So I noticed.

Look, at this.

We could buy
an almost-new

king-size waterbed.

I don't think we should consider
buying common property

when we can't even
hold hands in public.

Andrea.

Dan, you better turn away
from me, someone might be

watching us.
You're not being fair.

I'm not?

Excuse me, what about you?

Every time
I think about us,

I don't understand it.

Why, why is it we have to hide
behind closed doors?

I mean, are you so ashamed

for your friends
to find out

that you're going out
with a freshman?

Of course not.

Well, why is it all we can do

is do it in your room?

Look, it's just...

you know... people talk.

Look, we can't go on this way.

What are we going to do?

Brando, I think I actually
aced my first college exam.

Steve, what's
the matter with you?

I just asked you about
social structure,

which is what the whole last
section of the test was on,

you haven't told me
what your answers were.

I wrote GAIL.

You wrote Gail?
Who's Gail?

Goals, Adaptation,
Integration and Laws.

Very good, Steve.
I'm impressed.

Hey, Dr. Hangenberry.

That's what you get when
you take the KEG super cram.

(clears throat):
Hey, Silver.

What's going on?

Moby Dick.
822 pages.

If I get halfway
through it by tomorrow,

I may not get bounced.
You're gonna get bounced.

Don't worry, pal,
just take a load off.

The whale did it.

The whale did it.
Thanks.

Hey, guys.
Hi, John.

Hi.
Hey, Steve.

So Charlie Dixon goes
to Leslie Summer

and says, "Listen,
with your blessing

"we'd like this year's
KEG-Alpha homecoming float

to reflect something
a little more relevant."

So, what are we doing?

A tribute to Velcro
and other household fasteners.

(giggles)

That's good,
who thought of that?

Thank you, thank you,
thank you.

Ah, you're a funny guy.

I'm trying.

So, when do I graduate
from phone date

to the real thing?

Maybe after midterms,

if you're nice.

If I'm...?
I'm nice.

I thought you
broke up with McKay.

I did, but right now,
I need to talk to him.

Kelly...

I'm not just doing
doughnuts here, am I?

You know, spinning my wheels,
chasing my vestigial tail.

You're a funny guy.

Hi.

How you doing?

I'm doing.

Well, it's good to see
you back on campus.

And why is it good to
see me back on campus?

Don't do this, Dylan.

I still want to be
part of your life.

Kel, what do you want to go and
do something like that for?

My life sucks and you know it.
Dylan...

What do you want me to say, huh?

None of this has
been easy on me,

I'll tell you that.

But I'm not gonna get myself
in another situation

where some little punk with
a big gun can do a number on me.

CAROL:
I'm about to pop a pie

in the microwave,
if you want to hang around.

Uh, no, thanks,
I'll troll for it later.

I got to hit the books.

What about you, Brenda?

Um, I did my studies
this afternoon.

No, I think she meant

do you want a piece of pie?

Oh, um, no, I can't.
I have to go.

Stuart's waiting for me.

Guys, I promised that
I would meet him for coffee.

We won't be late.

Be firm, but gentle, Dad.

I think they like each other.

I'm getting that impression.

I mean, what is
the crime here?

You set us up.

What, do you want us
to hate each other?

No, that's not the point.

But this whole thing with
Stuart's going way too fast.

CINDY:
Honey, just give yourselves time
to come up for air.

I mean, you've got other things
going on in your life.

I'm keeping up with everything.

JIM:
What about him?

Larry Carson's
a pretty demanding boss.

I can't imagine he's too happy

about his son gallivanting
around every night.

(phone ringing)

(groans)

Hello.

Uh, yes, he's right here.

Oh!

Thank you.

Well, that sounds wonderful.

It's, uh, Larry Carson.

He's inviting us

to his place in Bel Air
for brunch on Saturday?

Is he really?

CINDY:
He, uh,

called it a triple date.

(sighs)

I rest my case.

Okay, folks read
'em and weep.

Nice work.

For those of you who did
well, have a nice weekend.

For those of you who
did not, shame on you.

Bro, I got a "B"!

I told you, you should have
joined a fraternity, man.

I will follow my brothers
through the gates of hell.

I love college.

How'd you do?

I got an "A" plus.

Ah, so you did.

What's this? A note
from Professor Randall?

"Could you meet me
tomorrow at 1:30?"

A Saturday meeting?

How cozy.

Well it's obvious you've
become the teacher's pet.

How about the Santa Monica
Promenade?

There must be at least
a dozen films there.

No, half the students from our
dorm will be out there cruising.

Hey, what about
the Nuart Theater?

They're showing a D.H. Lawrence
double feature film there.

Hmm.

No, you're right.

You don't want
to go see that.

I didn't say that.

No, but you were thinking that
it's just the kind of movie

people from your department
would want to go and see.

Look-- I came here because
I wanted to ask you out

on a real date
in front of real people.

But you've got to decide
what we're doing.

I just need...

I just need time
to think about this.

I mean, it's not easy
going public.

Every place feels so risky.

See? So it's not just me.

We could always-- do your room?

Did anybody see you
come in here?

No.

(door locking)

How are you at Scrabble?

You want another bite?

No.
No?

You don't want
another bite?

I think she's had enough.

Well, I just like to make sure
she's well fed,

because who knows what goes into
her mouth after Mel takes her.

Well, I'll clean her up 'cause
Mel should be here any time.
Thanks, honey.

I want her ready and me
long gone before he gets here.

Dylan's on his
way over, too.

You're kidding?
You guys are back on?

Well, I said to him, "I still
want to be part of your life,"

and today he called me up and he
asked me to go out on a date,

to the gun range.

Oh, how romantic.

What was I supposed to say?

"According to chapter four
of my pysch book,

you're going through
posttraumatic stress syndrome"?

Well, you just be careful there.

I will. I'm just going
to keep him company.

(doorbell ringing)
That must be him.

DAVID:
I'll get it.

MEL:
Hi, Dave.

Donna, you
look great.
Thanks, Mel.

DAVID:
Hey, Dad. Hi Nina.

Who's Nina?

You been working out
or something?

You look big,
nice and buff.

Well, it's Nina's doing.
She's a fitness fanatic.

Where's my little darling?

I assume you don't mean me?

I'm sorry. I didn't think
you'd still be here.

Nina, this is Jackie,
Erin's mother.

And don't you forget it.

Jackie, you're just making
this worse than it is.

Oh I am, huh? Well, tough.

Have a nice weekend.

You certainly started
mine out right.

(door slamming)

Your mother just won't let
us get on with our lives.

Can you blame her?

How could you bring your
girlfriend here, Mel?

I can't win.

Kelly, they were going
to meet sooner or later.

You are just as bad as
your father, aren't you?

Well, you're just as
neurotic as your mother.

Excuse me, can I
say something here?

No.
No.

Fine.

All right, your turn.

Sorry, you know,
I'm for gun control.

Yeah, well, if you
wanna control your
gun, use both hands.

Come on, you'd be a fool
not to learn this.

Dylan, don't call me that.

Kelly, there are two million
handguns in Los Angeles alone.

How soon before one of
them's pointed at you?

Now come on, do one clip.
It won't kill you.

There you go.
Get it like that.

Square yourself up to
the target like I did.

Now just aim and
squeeze the trigger.

It's going to be
loud, isn't it?

Yeah, but just expect it.

The first one's
always the worst.

Where do I aim?

At the target.

Go for the center.

I can't do this.

Hey, what do you want?
You want to be a statistic?

You want to be a victim?

I mean, Kelly, the writing
is spray painted on the wall.

You got about as much
chance taking a bullet as
being in a car accident.

Or am I not supposed
to worry about that, huh?

It's not my problem,
I should let other
people worry about you?

I'm worried about you.
Don't be.

I'm getting pretty good at this.

What's the
matter with you?

I'm just scared.

I'm scared.

That's why I'm learning
to protect myself.

Can't we just get out
of here, please?

Haven't you been listening to
anything I've said tonight.

Kelly, what do you
want me to say?

It is a violent world
out there and nobody's safe.

I didn't make the rules,
but no one's safe.

Not you, not me, nobody.

Thank you.

Good morning,
Mr. and Mrs. Walsh.

The Carsons are
by the pool.

If you'll just follow
the path through the garden.

Thank you.

Hey, where have
you guys been?

We've been waiting for you.

We thought you lost
track of the time.

We late?
No, you're not late.

You're as punctual
as ever.

Brenda, stop giving
your father a hard time.

How you doing, Jim?

Terrific, Larry.

Your house is... overwhelming.

Well, thank you.

We like it.

You must be Cindy.

Hi. Very nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, too.

And this is my wife Vivian.

Hello, Vivian.

Oh, are these for me?

They're beautiful.

Your gardens are beautiful.

I have never seen
so many Oceana roses.

We are going to get
along fabulously.

Stuart.

Stuart, get
your rude self

out of the pool right
now and come and say
hi to the Walshes.

Well, at least he didn't
call me Stu, huh?

Hey, relax. It's
only my parents.

Hi. How you doing?

Hi.

Just let me dry off.

This is going to be
a long afternoon.

It sure is.

Mom, you don't have
to apologize.

I'm just so ashamed.

Walking out like I did--

I didn't even say good-bye
to Erin.

I miss her so much.
Well, you'll see her
Sunday night.

I hate the weekends.

Mom, it's going
to be all right, okay?

Andrea.
Hey, gents.

Uh, Kelly's
looking for you.

We know, that's
why we're here.

What's been going
on with you?

We haven't seen you
around lately.

I've been involved.

Involved? Involved is good.

Involved is good.

ANDREA:
Yeah, involved
is good.

But I feel like I'm trying

to get into
an ice cold pool step by step.

I know I'm going to love it,

it's just the getting
there that's agony.

Well, call me a guy,
but, in situations like this,

I usually opt for
the ol' cannonball.

The flying cannonball.

Into the deep end,
preferably naked.

Naked is good.

I'll take that into
consideration. Thank you.

Just remember,
naked is good.
Naked is good.

Hey, guys.
Hey, Kel what's
going on?

Thanks for coming.

No problem. What's up?

Dylan.

He's acting very scary.

I'm sure he's going
to be fine, Kel.

Not if he's spending
all of his time

at a target range
shooting guns.

Is that what he's doing?

Wow.

KELLY:
Believe me, Steve,
it's not wow.

It's like ever since the car
jacking, he's gone gun crazy.

I wouldn't be surprised if he's
already gone out and bought one.

BRANDON:
Listen, Kel,
I grew up hunting.

Owning a gun is not the
worst thing a guy can do.

Besides, it's just
a fact of life,

ever since the riots,
people in L.A.

have been arming
themselves.

Yeah. I get it.
Because this is the Wild West.

And it's the good guys
and the bad guys

killing each other
every day, right?

I wouldn't go that far.

Well, maybe
Dylan would.

You guys, he's acting like
he's Rambo or something.

Well, when he shaves his head
and starts talking

to himself in the mirror,
then we'll worry.

Brandon, you've seen him.
He is not in a good way.

I'll admit it.
He's had some bad moments.

Bad moments?

I haven't seen him this angry--
including when his father died.

I mean, I'm just afraid

that he's gonna hurt himself
or somebody else.

All right, assuming
you're right,

what do you want us
to do about it?

Just go over there, talk to him,

see for yourself, 'cause he sure
will not listen to me.

All right.
I've got to go up to campus

and talk to this professor,

but we'll get with him today,
okay?

Yeah.

Thanks.

He's our friend, too.

Here you are, sir.

Am I the only one having
seconds around here?

That would be thirds, Dad.

Jim, I hate to talk business,
but since I have you here,

I hope you don't
mind taking a look

at the preliminary numbers
on this Plano project.

Well, I think this is
my cue to exit.

Hey, Stuart, this mall
project involves you, too.

During the week, it does.

But right now,
if you don't mind,

I think the kids would
like to be excused.

Brenda, will you tell him
that, with his attitude,

he's never going
to amount to much.

Stuart, with your
attitude, you're...

What was that again, Larry?

Go on, get out of here.

Oh, they are
so cute together.

Hey, thanks for coming down.
You bet.

Listen, believe me,
I would not have

brought you down here
on a Saturday if it wasn't

a major front
burner issue.

Not a problem. What's going on?

Well, it's about one
of your classmates.

His name is
D'Shawn Hardell.

Although really, he just likes

the letter "D"
on his jersey.

Right, right, I read
about this kid--

hot prospect from Texas just
transferred here from some JC.

Yeah, unfortunately his academic
game isn't what it should be.

To say that this guy
needs a little coaching

would be an extreme
understatement.

So, you want me to tutor him?

Well, I'm interviewing

five students for the job.

Look, from your test, obviously
you've got a firm grasp

of the fundamentals and I know
you're a fellow sports pig,

so that makes you a
candidate for the job.

Cool.

Now, I should tell
you something.

D'Shawn's not dumb.

He's got it in him
to be a fine student.

He's just not motivated.
So it could be a struggle.

I'm game.

And there's gonna be
a little pressure, too.

If he's gonna be eligible
to walk on the court,

he's gotta get at east a "C"
in my class.

Ah-- The Mendoza Line.

That's right.

Named after Mario Mendoza,
a bad bat, good glove infielder

whose lifetime batting
average was .200.

A statistical measure for
major league competence.

If you don't mind,

I'll just cancel
the other interviews.

You mean, I got the job?

Slam dunk.

All right, thanks.

STUART:
Okay...

BRENDA:
Great shot.

Pinball's one
of the few things

I'm really good at.

At least according to my father.

Well, it must be very hard

to try and live up
to his expectations.

Oh, I gave that up
a long time ago.

I just let my dad write
me off as the idiot child.

Well, that's his loss.

But I must be maturing
because, for the first time,

I'm really enjoying being
back in the family fold.

I think you helped.

A lot.

Well, like I said-- I have that
effect on depressive types.

Hold on, hold on.

My parents are just outside.

Oh, so now the shoe's
on the other foot?

Well, I don't care.
Let them find out.

I love...

♪ Yo, gimme something
to dance to ♪

♪ Dance, boy... ♪

♪ Give me a big beat! ♪

MAN:
Hey, is this where
the party's at?

Hey, either one of you guys

D'Shawn Hardell?

Who's asking?
Brandon Walsh.

Professor Randall
told me

I could meet him here.

Oh. Yeah, man.

You're my tutor.
That's me.

Sweet.

How much they paying you?

Not as much
as they're paying you.

That's cold.

And I coulda had
a lot better deal

at Arizona State,
you understand?

But it was
a numbers thing

and I was man out.

So now...

I'm a Condor.

Hey, right
on the glass.

Yeah.

Hardell.

Hey, call me D'Shawn, cuz.

D'Shawn, we gotta
hit the books, man.

Randall wants us
to jump right in

and get ready
for Monday's class.

Don't hold the ball. Shoot it.

MAN:
You tell
him, bro.

Come on, man, we got
studying to do.

Go on down.

Only if you can
make that shot.

MAN 1:
Right.

MAN 2:
Uh-oh.

Brandon is hard.

Let's go. Two on two.

I'll take my tutor. Think fast.

KELLY:
Donna, did Dylan call for me?

Oh, great. Kelly's home.

DONNA:
No. Only John Sears.

Look, she's going
to notice Erin,

so, just be up front
and lose the attitude.

(seagulls cawing)

(clears throat)

Come on.

Oh! Heave-ho.

(sighs)

Hi, Kelly.

Say hi to Kelly, Erin.

You're baby-sitting?

Well, it's just
for the afternoon.

Oh, this is incredible.

Mel strikes again, huh?

He dumped her on you?

Look, just yell all you want
and get it over with, okay?

(shouting):
Yeah, I will, because I think
your father is really sick.

Yeah, well, your mom's
a space case half the time.

At least she's trying, David!

Yeah, well, so is he!

You guys, please!

(sighs)

She started it.

Oh, yeah,
I started it.

No. Neither of
you started it.

This is your parents' war,
not yours.

She's right.

(sighs)

Yeah.

I think that
for Erin's sake,

we need
to both remember

not to fight
our parents' battles.

All right.

That's better.

(laughs)

(loud, overlapping chatter)

Hi.

Hi.

Your note said to meet you
in the Union for a date,

so, here I am.

Good boy.

Where we going?
Oxnard?

No, right here.

Well...

not quite here.

Would you say
that this is the, um,

exact center
of the room?

Uh...

it appears
to be, yes.

What kind of
date is this?

Just say it is my version

of the flying cannonball.

(laughter and chatter)

(applause)

WOMAN:
Yay!

JIM:
I just don't think
we're going to be able

to defer
the whole thing, Larry.

I'm going to have
to run those numbers again.

Uh-huh.

Ah. Larry, are you still
hounding this poor man?

(laughs)

They're ready to leave,
and we're going out tonight.

Okay, the boss
has spoken.

Now we just have
to find Brenda.

Well, I understand

that she and Stuart are
going out tonight, too.

Again?

Listen, I got
to tell you,

I think that Brenda
is the best thing

that ever happened
to my son.

She is. She really is.

But every night?

(laughs)
Don't you think

they're burning the candle
a bit at both ends?

VIVIAN:
Are you kidding?

I wish I had all that energy.

(laughs):
Listen, you sit.

I'll go
find the kids.

Thanks.

Would you like some coffee?

Coffee, please.

(water running, knocking)

LARRY:
Stuart?

Stuart?

(knocking)

Hey, where's Brenda?

The Walshes are leaving.

Well, she's taking
a shower, Dad.

(water stops running)

Dad, I am over 21.

But she's not.

Hey, show a little respect.

Now get yourselves
discreetly downstairs,

and you can take her home.

Why? We're going out.
Not tonight.

Her parents want her to stay in.

Dad, I have tickets.

Hey, you guys have the rest

of your lives to be together.

Stuart?

Mr. Carson.

Um... hello, honey.

Oh, my God.

Stuart, next time, get her
to use the pool house.

I don't think her father

is as tolerant as I am, huh?

(tires squealing)

Fellas! What's
happening?

Looking for
you, baby.

Glad you made it.

Otherwise, we'd have to eat this
all by ourselves.

Oh, no chance.

What's with
the Jeep?

Turning over
a new leaf?

No, it's just a rental till
Manny gets the Speedster going.

Oh.
Come on in.

Watch it, man.
The cheese!

(laughter)

So, gentlemen,
what is happening?

Nothing, man.
How were the waves?

They're about three-foot.

Excellent sets, though.

Nice breaker
to the left.

From out there, the city
seems almost mellow.

Oh.
I can almost
imagine that.

Yeah, the problem is,
eventually,

you got to paddle back in, so...

Well, you look
a lot better, man.
Yeah, I feel better.

In fact, I was actually thinking

of taking some classes
on Monday.

I heard you've been
spending some time

at the gun range
popping off caps.

DYLAN:
Yeah.

Let me guess--
Kelly asked you guys

to come over here
and talk to me,

right?

She's just concerned,
that's all.

She thinks you've
gone Waco, man.

She thinks you're
stockpiling firepower here.

Guys, she's overreacting.

I mean, come on. She's just...

She's feeling guilty,
and I think we all know why.

I'll get the plates,
you guys grab the drinks.

Sounds good.

MAN:
A Walther PPK
9 mm Kurtz.

Excellent weapon.

Stopping power,
size, elegance.

14 in the clip,
one in the pipe.

I tried other guns,
but, really,

it was a no-brainer.

That's very unique.

Denny from the target
range says you're
a damn good shot.

Uh... hold on,
Mr. McKay.

Denny never told
me your age.

Unless you're over 21,
I'm afraid

I can't sell you a handgun.

I'm sorry,
that's the law.

Wait, you're telling me
I can't buy peace of mind?

How about a shotgun?

I don't think it'll fit
in my glove compartment.

Listen, buddy,

this city is full
of 15 year olds

running around
with MAC-10 Street Sweepers.

I don't think
anybody is checking their ID.

Hey, believe me, I sympathize
with your situation,

but I can't help you.

(sighs)

At least not here.

But after hours,
there are a lot of guys

who can get you anything
you want.

Okay.

I'll see you after hours.