All language subtitles for Metroland (1997).eng

Phone's ringing.

What time is it?

5:30.

It's a wrong number.

Might be something important.

Oh, it's woken Amy.

Oh. I'll get her.

There, there, there.

Hello.

It's about bloody time.

Who is this?

Who do you think it is?

Toni?

How are you, you old bastard?

Bloody hell!

Do you know
what bloody time it is?

What? Shit, no.

No, I don't, mate. No. Sorry.

It's not even 6:00.

Shit, I should be in bed.

I was.

Where are you?

Buggered if I know, mate.

Uh, are you in England?

Yeah, it's definitely England.
Yeah, yeah.

-Without a doubt. Yeah.
-This is a surprise.

What's it been?
Like, five years?

Yeah, yeah.
Something like that.

Listen. So, what, what?
Are we going to meet?

-Yeah.
-Yeah? What, tomorrow? Lunch?

Lunch. Yeah. Yeah, sure.

Right, right. Well, I'll--
I'll come over at about 1:00.

-Okay.
-Yeah?

Alright, then.
Ciao for now.

Can only be bad news
at this time of the morning.

That was Toni.

He's not gone vegetarian,
has he?

Nah.

Well, he didn't say.
I doubt it.

Knowing Toni, he could
have aligned himself

with some vegan
terrorist faction.

The Popular Front for the
Liberation of the Frozen Pea.

Look, I'm sorry.
I should have asked you first.

For God's sakes,
stop apologizing.

It's only Sunday lunch.

not moving in... is he?

He really likes you, you know.

Oh, gosh.

I feel somehow validated.

It's just....

-What?
-I never understood

why he had to be
so angry all the time.

He was always angry.

We both were.

We were part
of the Anger Generation.

You, angry? Come on.

Petulant, perhaps.

Anyway, he's a writer.

He believes
in telling the truth.

He's not a very good writer.

He's not-- he's not successful.

That doesn't mean
he's not good.

Doesn't make him
Proust, either.

You always defend him.

Of course I do.
He's my best friend.

Stop now.

Do not move.

Like that.

Don't look at me like that.

Oh! Oh! Oh, Chris!

Chris.

Oh, Chris! Oh! Oh!

♪

I know you want
to sleep with other women,

Chris, and I understand.

There's nothing
to feel guilty about.

In fact,

I want you to have affairs.

It'll be good for our marriage.

And, of course,

I'll still cook your dinner

and do your washing
and ironing.

Mmm.

I'm quite tired, Chris.

It's the weekend, love.

Sunday tomorrow.

I'm not really in the mood.

We never make love anymore.

We make love constantly.

I can't even remember
the last time.

Yesterday morning.

Yeah? We used to do it
three times a day.

Well, that was
when we were new to each other.

Anyway, it only happened
once and you complained

about being sore
for a week afterwards.

Sore, but very smug.

Ha, ha, ha!

Lloydy!

Come here!

You're ruined!
You're ruined!

Now, Africa, Chris.

You must get yourself
to Africa.

Black women... ah!

I was in Italy.
I went to Spain.

Spun me around, really.

Ended up in New York.

I kept meaning
to send a postcard.

You know how it is.

Why did you come back?

Oh, it's-- it's difficult
to talk about.

Not bad news, I hope?

No, it's okay. It's....

What's up, mate?

This is really hard.

Do you want me to leave you
two alone for a minute?

No.

No, you stay.
It concerns both of you.

You can hide from the
truth for only so long

before it all gets too much.

Time I faced up
to the way things really are.

You see, Chris...

I had to come back because...

I love you.

I always have.

You're the only person
in the world for me.

I'm sorry, Marion.

I know this must come
as a bit of a blow...

...but Chris and I were
meant to be together.

Oh, very funny!

Your faces!

What's her name?

Her name's Kali,
as in California.

It's where her folks were born,
only she's spelled with a "K".

Oh, you should have
brought her along.

Nah, we believe in having
separate friends.

I met her...

in a creative
writing course in Pasadena.

Yeah? What the hell
were you doing there?

I was teaching it.

I didn't know you went in
for that sort of thing.

Which? Teaching or
seducing students?

Huh?

No, no, I don't
if I can avoid it, you know.

But you got to subsidize
the old poetry somehow.

I mean, come on, if poetry's
going to mean anything

you got to take it
directly to the people.

That is pure paranoia.

Anybody who wants to
can read poetry.

Yeah, but they don't
want to, do they?

'Cause they're told what?

It's... it's a minority taste.

Late night slot.

You know, pigeon fancying,

goat fucking.

Whatever it is they
fucking get up to.

I see-- I see loads
of poetry in the shops.

Yeah, but--
but you don't see poetry

-in the shops, Marion.
-Yes, I do.

You see golfing limericks
and jolly historical ballads.

Dead, unthreatening stuff.

There's nothing vital!

-There's nothing...
-Oi, hey! Hey!

Nothing about
what's happening now.

Sorry, baby.

What you actually mean
is nobody stocks your books.

Exactly.

Bastards.

Chris?

Hmm?

What do you get up to
on your walks?

Nothing.

Think a bit.

What about?

I don't know,
serious shit.

The past, future,

meaning-of-life stuff,
you know.

Um, I make a few...

mental lists.

What kind of lists?

You know,
some people count sheep.

Uh, I make lists.

Chris Lloyd...

the story so far.

Healthy.

Not poor, not...

deformed, not...

starving.

-Not asleep.
-Not asleep.

Married: Yes.

Children: One.

Job: One. House: Yes.

Mortgage: Yes.
Car... arguably.

So on, so on.

'Til the panic subsides.

What have you got
to panic about?

Nothing.

That's what worries me.

Love you.

Love you back.

And your friend.

Toni hasn't changed, has he?

Toni's incapable of change.

Like the dinosaurs,
and look what happened to them.

-Marion.
-Mmm?

Would you still love me
no matter what I did?

-Why, what have you done?
-No. Nothing.

It's a... rhetorical question.

Would I still love
you no matter what?

No matter what.

You must be joking.

What kind of yield
are you expecting?

Oh, a good
few pounds, I suppose.

Now, listen, you dig up these
escapist bloody flower beds

you'll triple your output.

Yeah, well, I'm sticking
a few veg on the table,

not provisioning
the bloody Ukraine.

Good to see you, mate.

This is really something,
this is, Chris.

What is?

All this.

I mean, you've got the lot,
haven't you?

Everything a man could want.

I'm impressed.

Are you taking the piss?

Is this it?

Oh, bloody hell.
If you're asking me,

am I happy with the
vegetable patch,

the flower beds,

the wife and baby,
the job and the mortgage,

the answer's yes,

I am, strangely enough.

I believe you.

There's nothing wrong
in any of that.

Okay, no problem.

Just surprised, that's all.

Chris Lloyd,

happy ever after in Metroland.

Who'd have thought it?

They're already calling
them the sexy '60s.

Sexy, saucy '60s.

Oh, it gives you a hard-on
just saying it.

Yeah, Brigitte Bardot,
Anna Karina, Francoise Dorleac.

Think of the sex going
on in France!

If we were in Paris now...

Strolling down the Boulevard
St. Germain.

Stopping,
chatting with friends,

kissing on both cheeks.

Pernod and coffee with
Sartre and de Beauvoir

at Les Deux Magots.

Not much point being
a boulevardier

in the suburbs, is there?

No boulevards for a start,

and Acacia Avenue doesn't have
quite the same appeal.

I tell you one thing
to be said in favour

of nuclear war:
at least this place

would go up in smoke.

Imagine that,
the whole of Metroland

disappearing in one brilliant,
blinding flash.

A million sand wedges
melted into scrap.

Smouldering mountain
of occasional tables.

Middlesex's topiary
incinerated in an instant.

Could you throw us our
ball back, please?

Only the bloody English.

Tennis in the rain.

Poor sods.

Pathetic, isn't it?

And what will they
all end up doing?

Bank managers, the lot of them.

Oh, they can't
all be bank managers.

'Course they can.

Metroland was built
for bank managers.

Actual bank managers,
retired bank managers.

Student bank managers,
baby bank managers.

It's like "Invasion
of the Body Snatchers".

Instead of aliens--
bank managers.

Yeah.

Not me.

Christ, come on.

This one.

Monsieur,
that is wrong, no?

Impress the bourgeoisie?

Excuse me, sir.

My friend and I
would like to sleep
with your wife.

Sorry, old man?

We'll come over
to fuck her this Saturday
at teatime.

Do you speak English?
-No.

I think I can help you.

I'll translate
the question for you.

The young man wishes to know
if he might come to tea

on Saturday afternoon

with a view
to mowing your lawn.

-Mm.
-Non.

Thank you, thank you!

Those silly games
we used to play.

What's so silly about them?
Huh?

I mean, I might've been
childish about it,

but at least I had
the right idea

sticking one up
the bourgeoisie's fat,

complacent bum.

Those were great days,
weren't they?

Great. Come on, man,
you're talking like

it was a hundred years ago.

-It feels like it was.
-Does it?

So, when am I going
to meet this Kali, then?

Kali-- we're having a party.

-Why not come along?
-Great.

Soon, yeah.
Just don't wear that.

I haven't been
to a party in ages.

You know what it's like,
having a kid.

No, I don't, actually.

So, are you in love
with her, then?

In love?

What?

What's wrong with that?

Oh, come on, it's just
the way you say it.

I mean, what,
you sound like my dad.

Yeah. I mean, yeah
things are going

alright with Kali,
I suppose, you know.

She's a smart girl. She's...

-You'll like her.
-Yeah.

We have a non-monogamous
relationship, man.

-Really?
-Mm.

Christ.

Is she alright about that?

It was her idea.

I mean, neither of us
wants a relationship

based on what, possessiveness,
jealousy and that shit.

Mm.

What, so you just--

you just go-- off and...

I just... yeah.

Whenever I feel like it.

So...

you been unfaithful
to Marion yet?

-You're serious?
-Mm.

I'm very happy with my wife.

Are you?

No, I haven't been
unfaithful to her.

Oh, that was interesting.

What was?

That strenuous...
denial, you know.

I mean, what does that mean?

"No, but I wouldn't
half mind a bit.

No, but I, you know
nearly got some last week."

No, it means no,
because I don't want to.

What about sex?

Plenty of sex.

Alright, I'm only asking.

I mean, I'm sure Marion
sticks her heels in your ears

and drains you
as dry as a loofah, but...

Kindly... kindly keep your
disgusting similes

-away from my wife.
-Come on, you're only human.

I mean, what,
you've been together,

what, eight years now?

Don't you ever wonder
what it'd be like to go

to bed with another woman?

Of course, um...

Of course, but I mean,
everybody does.

That's-- that's--
that's just fantasy.

That's nothing to do
with actual life. That...

I mean, I don't lie
in bed thinking,

"Oh, Christ," you know,
"I hope I have it away

with somebody else
before I die."

-No?
-No.

And I would never do
anything to hurt her.

You might-- she might not mind.

Oh, we've won an award!

-Yes, I have.
-"Christopher Lloyd.

Advertising Design Awards
Winner, Gold Loom."

-Oh--
-Hey, now, this is it.

This is more like it.

Yeah, I thought
you'd like that one.

I'm impressed.

It's not exactly,
uh, Cartier-Bresson,

-though, is it?
-Hey, you always were

a bloody good photographer.

Oh, not quite good
enough, though.

Ah, could've been.

You could have been.

Whatever happened to that book
you was always going to do?

Do you remember?

Oh, yeah.

Well, um...

I thought it was time to get
serious about the career

when Amy came along, you know.

It's still on the back-burner,
though.

Well, what's it about?

Well, it's, um...

it's really... uh...

-It's in here?
-No, I'm not saying.

It's in here.
I'm sitting on it.

-My God.
-No, no, don't.

Christopher Lloyd's
deep, dark secrets.

No, leave it. No.

You'll only laugh.

What's the matter?
I won't laugh. Chris, come on.

Friends since the cradle.

It doesn't matter what it is,
I promise you.

However ludicrous,
trivial, obscene...

I'm not going to laugh, am I?

Yeah.
Let me see.

Watch out.

I'm, uh....

What I'm planning is a,
uh... a photographic...

history of travel in London.

You know, I mean, the premise
being sort of the extraordinary

within the ordinary, you know,
because everybody's

so familiar with, uh,
you know, the trains,

and they cease to see anything
special about it, really.

But this is one of the,
um, ideas I've got

for the cover at the moment.

It's just a rough thing
you know, but....

Fuck me.

An illustrated guide
to the Metropolitan Line.

-Yeah, thanks, Toni.
-What an enticing prospect.

Thanks, you bastard.

Hey, come on, I'm sorry.

Yeah, don't overdo it,
you know?

You know, it's just one
of a lot of ideas.

Come on, hey.
It's a great idea.

I'm gonna do that
one yet, you know?

I look forward to it,
honestly.

-Yeah.
-Alright?

What's happened to you, Chris?

What do you mean?

You know what I mean.

-Punk concert?
-Yeah.

He's got a friend in the band.

-You hate punk.
-No, I don't.

-Yes, you do.
-No.

You know you'll hate it.

Anyway, you're only going

because Toni wants you to go.

I happen to be very interested.

They might have an age
policy on the door:

"Middle-aged swingers
strictly banned."

I'm not that old.

You know, you've developed
this very annoying habit

of constantly telling me
how I should be feeling.

What I will and won't like.

I am capable of independent
thought, you know?

How long's Toni staying
around this time?

I don't know.

He-- he didn't say.

What's he living on anyway?

Dole and savings, I guess.

You know, he doesn't
seem to be short.

He's probably taking
that Kali woman

for all she's worth.

Well, that's a very...

aggressive way of putting it.

Just an educated guess

based on what I know
about Toni.

You've never liked him,
have you?

No, I like him.

I just don't have
a rose-tinted view

of him, that's all.

You know, you can sound

very cynical sometimes, Marion.

Don't tell me
you've only just noticed.

Yeah, well, anyway,
I'm gonna...

I am gonna go to this gig.

It will be, uh, it'll be
an experience, you know?

It'll be something...

different.

Be fun.

♪ Destroy! Destroy!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

♪ Destroy! Destroy!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

Nice shirt, wanker!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

♪ Destroy! Destroy!

Hey! Mwah!

Wonderful, aren't they?

Yeah, very talented.

♪ Destroy! Destroy!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

Take it!

Go on, a big one!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

♪ Destroy! Destroy!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

♪ Destroy! Destroy!

♪ Destroy the hoi polloi!

-Hello.
-Oh, look at that nonce.

Hello, there. Mr. Nonce to you.

Man with a dress on.

I saw you!

What are you doing?

-Chris, you alright?
-Yeah!

This fun!

This is fun, Toni!

You-- you always knew
how to have fun, didn't you?

I al-- I always...

Ugh,

I always felt
a bit dull next to you.

What's the-- what's the secret?

No secret.

No, really. What is it?
What's the secret? Toni?!

Your problem, Chris,
is you're just busy doing

what other people
want you to do.

Your parents, Marion, everyone.

The trick is to do
what you want.

Sod what he wants,
what about me?

Are we shagging or not?

I should know better than
to try screwing old men.

Fun!

I'm having fun!

Yeah, this is it.

-Come on, then.

Up you get. Up, up, up, up.

From now on I'm going
to do what I want.

-Of course, you are. Come on.
-No. No, really.

-Come on, let's get you home.
-I'm gonna do what I want.

-No.
-Come on.

-Hey, Toni, I mean it.
-That's nice, now, come on.

What's Marion
going to say?

Taxi! Taxi!

Hey, stop there!

In you get, in you get.

Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris,
you do not want sex.

-I bloody do, yeah.
-No, you don't. Come on.

You're going to bed.
You're going to bed.

You are in the first stage
of a three-stage hangover.

Marion.

-Oh, Toni...
-I say, sir.

-Toni.
-Oi!

I say, I've never seen
the likes of it.

Out. I said the sofa.
Go on, get out.

-Out, out.

This is private.
Private!

-Chris, come on.
-Yeah.

-Come on.
-Sweetheart.

-Come on.

Stage one of this hangover:
start feeling randy.

And stage two is pass
out halfway through.

No. Feeling ran-- rubbish!

-Rubbish.
-Anyway...

I want it to be you
that I make love to.

-It's me!
-No, it's not.

It's eight pints of lager
with an erection.

-No.
-Yes, it is.

-Come on, get into bed.
-Stage one,

stage two...
What's stage three?

Stage three,
my dear, is wake up

-with a blinding headache.
-Bollocks!

-I feel absolutely fine.
-To bed. Bed, bed!

-Come on.
-No, I feel... yeah.

Into bed. Come on.

-Go on. In, in.

I'm going to get the baby.

Oh, Chris, for God's sake.

Are you coming back?

How you feeling?

Fine, thanks.

I phoned the office
and told them you were ill.

I got to-- got to get going.

Thanks for the sofa.

Everything okay?

Fine.

You and Toni... you had

a row or something?

'Course not.

Saw you snapping away
on the platform.

Interested in trains, are you?

Not really, just...

there's not much else
to photograph around here.

It's very fancy.

Got it for my birthday.

I retired today.

They gave me a whisky decanter.

Forty-two years
in the same company

and nobody's noticed
I never drink.

This is the last time
I'll ever make this journey.

This used to be
a grand line, you know?

Used to have ambitions.

Do you know there
was a Pullman car

right up until Hitler's
war started.

It was called the Mayflower.

It wasn't just ambition
with the Victorians, you see.

There was confidence as well.

Confidence in ambition.

I mean, can you imagine?

They wanted to join
the Metropolitan Line up

with Northampton
and Birmingham

and have a great link through
from Yorkshire and Lancashire,

through Quainton Road,
through London,

joining up with the
Old Southeastern

and through a channel tunnel
to the Continent.

Monumental.

Is that when they started
calling it Metroland here?

Oh.

That bloody nonsense.

No, that was just a name
made up to please

the estate agents during
the war before Hitler's.

Catchy name to make
it sound cozy.

Cozy homes for cozy heroes.

Twenty-five minutes
from Baker Street

and a pension at the
end of the line.

Turned it into
what it is now...

bourgeois dormitory.

Aren't you bourgeois, then?

'Course I am.

So are you, I shouldn't wonder.

No, I'm not staying
in Metroland.

I'm gonna live in Paris
and take pictures.

French never could run
a decent rail service.

You see, it doesn't
matter where you go.

Metroland isn't a place.

It's a state of mind.

Oh, Amy, wha--

oh, sweetheart,
what are you doing?

Marion!

There's okay, sweetheart,
there's a good girl.

Marion!

There' a good girl.

Sorry, love, she's just...

-on.
-...taken everything down.

Aw...

Daddy's had a bad day. Come on.

-Stop now.
-Ne bouge pas.

Comme ça.

The camera...

Stop it! No more, no more.

You taught me
to say what I'm feeling,

now you're blaming
me when I do.

-You know...
-I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I was-- I was-- yes,
but I was teaching you

to be sincere, not cruel.

Chris?

If you're going to look
at dirty pictures

of your old girlfriends,
at least have the style

to do it openly.

Sex with me
was always wonderful, Chris.

Better than it is
now with Marion.

No, that's not true.

That's just nostalgia.

No... you gave me multiple
orgasm every time.

Did I?

You never said.

Mmm.

You were a fantastic lover.

Marion doesn't appreciate you.

Yeah.

You might be right about that.

Face it.

You don't desire her anymore.

No, I do.
Just not in the same way.

You never stopped desiring me.

Yeah.

I didn't fall in love with you
either, though, did I?

Are you sure?

Maybe you were just
too young to know.

Maybe you just lost your
nerve and ran back

to where you felt comfortable.

What do you mean?

I thought you came
to Paris to be an artist.

-I did.
-So, what are you doing

ten years later living a mile
from where you grew up

doing a job you despise?

Face it, Chris...
you've become your parents.

-That's not true.
-Alright, then.

Why didn't you
stay in Paris?

You should be out
in the streets with them.

You'd take
good pictures.

I'm an artist,
not a journalist.

How's the wife today?

Very good.

Unfortunately.

Do you have a light,
please?

Thank you.

-Ciao.
-Ciao.

Who's that girl?

What girl?

Leopard print,
dark hair.

Leopard print,
dark hair, very pretty?

Yeah.

No idea.

Chris...

Don't bother, alright?

Don't get close to girls.

They only want
to get you by the balls.

Look at me.

Tell me...

Do you make good
money selling pictures?

Not with mine.

Because I need help
this weekend.

Unless of course...

it's too undignified
for an artist of your caliber.

No! Yes.

Thanks, Henri.

"Africa's where
it's happening, Chris.

Vibrant culture. Great people.

Thinking of hanging out
here for a while...

or maybe heading down
to Afghanistan,

'cause apparently they grow

the best pot
in the world there.

You wouldn't believe
the skirt out here.

The American girls.

Jesus, even you could score."

"I'm working on getting
to Paris.

Just not sure when.

"Don't start
the revolution without me.

Eat the rich.

Love, Toni."

You're meant to be here,
you bastard.

Not bloody Afghanistan.

That's it. It's done.

What's done?

This morning, my
wife told me her cocoa was cold.

I snapped.

I went down
to the basement...

grabbed an axe and
chopped her up into tiny pieces.

You should have seen
the blood.

You killed your wife?

Not really.

But a man can dream.

- Hi.
- Hi.

You took these?

- Yes.
- They're brilliant.

Oh... They're not bad.

My name's Chris.

-Chris Lloyd.
- Nice to meet you.

I'm Annick.

-Annick.
- So you're English?

- Yes.
- I can hear it.

Alexandria Quartet, huh?

-Yes.
- You're reading
Mountolive?

-Yes.
- In English?

Uh-huh.
I'm practising.

I love speaking English,
but, uh...

you know, I make
so many mistakes.

No. It sounds good to me.

Um, did you read the first two?

Yeah, of course.

I mean, if I started
reading a quartet

on the third book,
I might get a bit lost.

Yeah. Yeah, right, absolutely.

Yeah, you'd have to be
really stupid to start

on the third
book, wouldn't you?

Yes, of course.

Which, um,
you're not, I'm sure.

Stupid, I mean.

Would you like another drink?

Yes. I'd like that.

That's how it always
starts with girls.

One dry white
and boom!

Your cock in the mangle.

I love to drink a little bit.

-Mm-hmm.
-Makes me less inhibited.

Yeah, me, too.

Trouble is, I get so
uninhibited, I pass out.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

You keep staring at me.

I'm sorry.

Have I got something
on my face?

No! No, no, no,
not at all, um....

It's just, you're so....

Oh, God, sorry.

No, I'm just....

What I'm trying to say
is, you're really....

Well-read?

Yeah, exactly.

-Annick.
-Hmm?

Let's go,
we're gonna be late.

All right, I'm coming.

It was, uh,
real nice meeting you.

-Yeah.
-Bye.

Annick!

Do you want to see
a film on Friday?

-There's a new Bresson.
-Friday, um...?

Yes, at, uh, six o'clock here?

-Yeah.
-Bye.

So, what did you think?

Oh, I think it is so, so sad.

It's so true, you know?

And lots of little things.

-Lots of humour.
-Humour. Maybe.

Ah, no, you mean sad humour.

You're absolutely right, yeah.

Um... not the funny sort.

No.

-The human comedy.
-Yes!

No, not the kind of
humour you laugh at.

God, no.

Well... so....

Let's walk.

Yeah. Yeah, where to?

I don't know.

Who cares?

-What?
-Oh, no, sorry.

Ah, no, I just wish,
um, my friend Toni

was here to see this,
'cause we always dreamed

about being boulevardiers.

-And now I'm about to be one.
-Quite.

♪ All the
boys and girls my age ♪

♪ Walk down the street
in pairs ♪

♪ ll the boys and
girls my age ♪

♪ Know what happiness
feels like ♪

♪ Looking in each
other's eyes ♪

♪ And holding each
other's hand... ♪

Oh, a street gutter.

So French.

Hey, that's
the Palais-Royal.

I had lunch there with my boss.

Oh, nice.

-You're very clever.
-No, I'm not.

-Oh. Hmm.
-You think so?

-I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

♪ Are the same
in every way ♪

♪ Boring and without joy

You're mad.

♪ No one whispers
"I love you" in my ear ♪

♪ All the boys and
girls my age... ♪

Sorry.

Slowly. Slowly.

Slowly. Slowly.

-Is it the first time?
-Huh?

-Is it the first time?
-No.

No, I've slept
with loads of women.

Ah. Oh, you know,
a couple-- um, some.

Well, one or two.

Um...

do I-- shall I...
shall I put something on?

Yes.

-Please.
-Okay.

Okay. Oh, shit.

No, I can't. Um... sorry.

Let's try....

Um. Wow, shit.

Okay, give it to me.

God.

-Dear, dear.
-Uh, damn. No--

No. No, I'm going to do it.

-It's okay?

Yeah.

Ah!

Did you come?

No.

Oh, God. Sorry.

Oh, no, it's okay.

I usually don't the first time.

Oh.

I like the sound of that.

Implies there's going
to be a second.

Oh, I hope so.

If it's what you want.

Well, yeah, I mean,

I like to sell my women
into slavery

after ravishing them
usually, but, um...

-alright?
-Oh, is that right?

In your case, I'm prepared
to make an exception.

Mm-hmm?
I'm coming back.

Look, um...

I'm sorry, I'm...

you probably noticed.

I'm not...

I'm not
very experienced.

Uh... have you...

been with many men?

Oh, thousands.

Silly.

I never thought the sound
of a flushing toilet

could be sexy,

but I guess it depends
who's doing the flushing.

Very funny.

Well, at least I can
keep you entertained

while you're not coming.

-Hmm?
-Hmm?

- Take that.

Voila!

We're here.

Mmm.

-How are you feeling?
-Wonderful.

You don't have to speak English
if you don't want to.

No, I want to improve.
I want to.

I want to-- what the word?

"Impress" on you.

You do impress on
me all the time.

Your English hardly needs
improving at all.

-Your English is wonderful.
-Oh, liar.

Tell me what you're feeling,
but not just

generally, like-- exactly.

Fine.

Normal, I suppose.

Mm-hmm, okay,

now, I want
really what you're feeling.

Tell me!

Um....

Um...

uh, I don't know, um...

I don't know.

You go first.

Well, okay.

Let's try, um, well,

um,
I'm amused and surprised

that I have a beautiful
English boyfriend and, um...

...guilty about what my mother
would say about the sex.

And, um...

anxious for her opinion of you.

And, uh...

maybe a little bit worried

that I'm not quite clever
enough for you.

And that you might
want a girlfriend

who's more than just
a secretary.

Mm-hmm.
That's it.

Now you try.

Alright, um...

well,

I'm content...

peaceful...

tranquil with, um...

...an undercurrent
of turbulence.

My God, what was that,
the weather forecast or...?

Please.
I mean, it's not a test.

Don't look so worried.

No, it's--

It's just in England,

when, uh, you ask somebody

how they are,
you know, it's--

It's words.
It's just a courtesy.

The last thing
in the world that you expect

is that they're going
to actually tell you.

Yeah.

You're so direct.

Where did you learn
to be so sincere?

What do you mean, "learn"?

I mean, either you say
what's truthful or you don't.

-That's it?
-Yes.

You look so scared.

How do I know
if I'm in love?

You know it when
you're house is on fire.

That's all.

Right arm around the wicket.

-Four balls to come.
-Play.

It's a glorious run,
surely the century.

Sorry.

Oh, it's a good one.

-My run!
- Shit!

God. Sorry.

Are you okay?

Why are the English
always so English?

I came here
to get away from all that.

I think the natives
are getting restless.

Why, what did he say?

Um, something unflattering
about the English, I think.

All right, that's
enough, go play somewhere else.

Did you get any of that?

Maybe he wants
to take our picture.

Do you think
he's putting on an act?

Do you think
he's English himself?

Are you?

He certainly acts
like the real thing.

Well, speaking for myself,

I could do with a vin rouge.

-Any takers?
-Yeah.

Come on.

Are you coming?

Why not?

Your drink
and the lady's.

So, why were you pretending
to be French, then?

Well, you know
the bloody English abroad,

they're always complaining,
aren't they?

It's always something,
it's either the food

or the beer
or the terrible service.

"Oh, aren't the
Parisians rude?"

Or something like that,
I mean... and shouting.

As though that's going to make
them understood or something.

Why would I want to be English?

Well, surely there must be
something you like about us.

I can't think of anything.

Don't you miss home?

-No, of course not.
-Oh.

What?

Don't you believe me?

'Course I believe you.

You can't catch me.

Hi. Le Monde,
please.

Do you speak English?

- This one?
You want this one?
-No.

Mm.

What are you doing today?

-Nothing special.
-Okay.

Then, see you.

Dear.

And I've-- I've
started thinking

in French, you know?
I feel French.

I wave my hands about
when I talk, you know?

I have, uh...

sex in the afternoon.

I mean, if that's not French,
I don't know what is.

I mean, I...
I belong here, you know?

I feel like I'm at home.

-But?
-It's....

It's not that
I miss England, exactly,

but there's... one part
of me that feels like

it's being disloyal
to the other.

Well, maybe
you're just homesick.

No.

-Lonely?

-Hardly.
-Oh, yes,

you've got thing my--
what's her name?

Anyway...

what's she like,
this girl that you're having

"a relationship with",
as you put it?

Her name's Annick.

What's wrong with
putting it like that?

You don't have
to tell me about her.

It's none of my business,
anyway.

No, I don't mind telling
you about her.

She's, um...
she's really...

direct, and, uh, emotional,

and sincere-- everything.

I mean, we've got this real
connection between us.

-We never lie to each other.
-What, never?

No.

Never.

Don't worry, I'm not trying
to embarrass you.

I'm not embarrassed.

What are you going to do, then?

Do?

For a living.

Take photographs.

Does it pay well?

I don't know.

I haven't actually
sold any yet.

Oh.

Well...

how are you going to provide
for your family, then?

What family?

Oh, the one you'll
have one day.

Bloody hell, give me time.

Why?

Well, 'cause I'm 21.

I'm still...

you know...

still having relationships.

What, more than one?

Well, not simultaneously, no.

Anyway, marriage
is a relationship.

Yeah.

So?

Well, you said you were going
to have relationships

and then get married,

as if they were
two different things.

No, I didn't say I was
going to get married.

Well, no, I suppose
you didn't technically, no.

Too bloody right, I didn't.
Might never get married.

Oh, I think you will.

Why?

You're not original
enough not to.

-Chris...

...does Annick
know about me?

She knows I see friends.

Does she know you see this
particular friend?

Not specifically, no.

It's never come up.

It's no big deal,
though, is it?

It's not as if...

...we've got anything to hide.

I thought
you never lied to her.

I'm not lying.

If she asks me, I'll tell her.

Well...

if she doesn't
know I exist,

how can she ask?

Fair enough.

I'll tell her then, shall I?

Don't start reading things

into these conversations,
will you?

What do you mean?

Well...

if you analyze them too much

you might just get
the idea that I fancy you.

Do you?

I'll see you, then.

What shall we do tonight?

I don't know.

See a movie?

How about the new,
uh, Truffaut?

This English girl I met
said it's pretty good.

That's settled, then.

Yeah. She really liked it.

Good.

Yeah, um... Marion,

this English girl
friend of mine said it was, um,

one of her favourite films.

Are you trying
to tell me something?

What do you mean?

Is this the famous
English tact?

No.

Merely pointing out
that apparently

the film's quite good.

Good.

Who told you that?

A friend.

An English girlfriend?

Well, not "girlfriend,"
y'know, I mean,

a friend
who happens to be a girl.

You've got, uh,
French boy friends,

-haven't you?
-Yes!

But I don't mention
them three times running unless

I have a very
good reason.

Well, I'm just explaining that,

you know, she's a friend.

Um... we see each other
from time to time and...

I've been meaning to mention
her to you, that's it.

I think that you mean
you've been meaning

to mention that
you're sleeping with her.

No!

Of course not.
I sleep with you.

Or that you want to.

No! Hold on.
This is getting ridiculous.

I'm not being, um...
what's the bloody word?

-I'm not being perfidious.

You know, Albion
is always perfidious.

They teach you that in school.

No, I'm not--
listen, I just...

I'm trying to be honest.

I don't hide things from you.

Are you sleeping with her?!

No.

Are you in love with her?

Of course not. I...

I like you.

Thank you very much. So kind.

Of course you do.

No, I mean, I-I really do.

I love being here,

being with you and everything.

You know, I love it,
I think, um...

I like...
like you a lot.

How...
how rational!

How... how measured!

How English you are!

You say it as if you'd
known me for 20 years

rather than a few months.

Well, you taught me
to say what I'm feeling,

now you're blaming me
when I do.

I thought... you know....

-I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
-I was-- I was...

yes, but I was teaching you
to be sincere, not cruel!

I'm sorry. I mean, not 'cause
I've done anything wrong.

I haven't,
but I'm sorry because

you've misunderstood
the situation.

No. No.

Why are you...?

Annick....

Why are you crying?

Huh?

Is it because
I mentioned that girl?

I don't know. Tell me.

Is it because you think
I don't love you enough,

or something?

Is it because you love me?
Tell me.

Annick?

It's alright.

God save the Queen.

Oh...

Perhaps he has been
malade, huh?

He looks healthy enough to me.

Perhaps he has been sulking.

But he's not
the sulking type, is he?

Perhaps he work hard.

Perhaps this dog,
she has given him the elbow.

Oh, perhaps that, yes.

Anyway, how could we let you
spend the evening by yourself?

We thought you might be ill.

I thought you might
not like me anymore.

I made a terrible mistake.

Annick...

meant everything to me, I...

I loved her. I loved her.
I realize it now.

I don't want to go
to bloody England!

I hate England.
I'm staying here.

I'm going to stay in Paris.

I'm going to be an artist.
I don't want a wife.

I don't want bloody kids.

I don't want responsibility.
I don't need any of that.

Well, at least
we know where we stand.

-Attagirl.

It's Mummy, Amy.

Oh, hey, hey. watch what
you're doing with those hands.

Oh, that's great.

Yeah, that looks lovely.

On this beach,
sun coming down

music playing, campfire,
and the women--

unbelievable.

Incredible.

Do you ever think about...
somebody else

when you're having
sex with Kali?

Of course.

I mean, who doesn't?

Me.

Until recently, just lately.

Um...

whenever I make....

Fucking.

Yeah, uh, with Marion.

Um...

Annick keeps popping up.

You know, I mean, I--

it's not that
I physically want her.

If she walked
in the door right now

I might not fancy her
at all, but...

I've just been
thinking about the past a lot.

And I'm wondering
what that says about...

me and Marion.

To be honest, we haven't been
getting on that well recently.

What, are you going
to leave her?

No. No. I haven't even
thought about that.

It's just I feel....

Trapped. You feel trapped.

Quite frankly, Chris,
I'm not surprised.

Look what you've done
with your life.

No wonder you're bored.

Oh, and I suppose your life
is something wonderful

by comparison.

I do what I want to do.

And I'm proud of my work.

Can you say the same?

I'm your oldest friend, Chris.

I know what's going
on in your head.

I can read you like a book.

You keep thinking to yourself,
"Did I make the right choice?"

Well, did you?

Toni did ask you, you know.

Of course he did.

"Come to Toni's party.

Dress informal.

-Wives optional."
-Rubbish.

He wanted you to come.

Well, someone's got
to look after Amy.

We could have got a babysitter.

We never go out together.

We haven't been
at a party in decades.

You always say
you hate parties.

Yeah, well,
I want us to have fun.

You mean you want
you to have fun.

Well, go on,
I'm not stopping you.

You know what I really hate
is that you feel this need

to drive a wedge
between me and Toni.

Like you've got something
against there being anybody

who knew me before you.

I think you'd better go.

I hope it's fun.

♪ Strolling along,
minding my own business ♪

♪ Well, there goes
a girl and a half ♪

♪ She's got me goin'
up and down ♪

♪ She's got me goin'
up and down ♪

♪ Walking on the beaches,
looking at the peaches ♪

♪ Well, I've got
the notion, girl ♪

♪ That you've got
some suntan lotion ♪

♪ In that bottle of yours

♪ Spread it all over
my peeling skin, baby ♪

♪ That feels real good

♪ All the skirts lappin'
up the sun, lap me up ♪

Lloydy!

Hey, hey, how you doin'?

What did you do,
raid an art gallery?

What are you doing with
your trousers still on?

-Huh?
-Where's Kali?

Downstairs, I think.

Bit of a sausage roll
crisis going.

Listen, go down
and cheer her up,

she's a bit depressed.

She just had an abortion.

It was her decision, you know,
I mean, but I agree.

I mean, who wants to bring
another little bastard

into this shit heap, huh?

Except budding bourgeois
fat cats, of course.

Enjoy yourself,
for fuck's sake.

♪ Walking on the beaches,
looking at the peaches ♪

♪ Well, you just take
a look over there ♪

♪ Where?

♪ Is she trying to get out
of that clitares? ♪

That's good.

♪ So you win again,
you win again ♪

♪ Here I stand again,
the loser ♪

Prawn vol-au-vent?

They're, uh,

part-raw, part-incinerated,

barbecued-sushi-effect
sort of thing.

I know you.

You were
staring at me in the hall.

Well, not staring, exactly.

-You were checking me out.

Oh, it's alright,
I was doing the same to you.

-I'm Joanna, by the way.
-Chris.

Are you a friend of Toni's?

Mm, that's one way
of describing it.

Has anyone ever told you
you have a nice face?

"Nice"?

Ugh. I--

I suppose my mother
might have mentioned that.

You can get me a drink,
if you want.

Oh, can I?

Mind if I get myself one?

♪ Oh, it's so funny
to see you after so long ♪

♪ And with the way
you look I understand ♪

♪ That you
were not impressed ♪

♪ But I heard you and that
little friend of mine ♪

Hello again.

Hello.

I was wondering
where you'd gone.

I was looking for you.

So, now that you found me,
what are you going to do?

Do?

Well, you're interested,
aren't you?

I know I am, so I assume
we're going to fuck.

Oh, I... don't know about that.

I'm married.

I'm not prejudiced.

No, it's not that easy.

If you're worried about
getting involved...

don't.

I'm not into that shit.

You're a married man.

You've got it all
out in the open.

Well, good for you--
on both counts.

Can we go to bed now?

Well, that wasn't
so difficult, was it?

I want you to have affairs.

It'll be good for our marriage.

It'll be good for our marriage.

I'll still cook your dinner,

and do your washing
and ironing.

It's a little more practical
if you're within reach.

Have you got any Durex?

I'm not on the pill.

No...

It's, um...

not the kind of thing
you carry around with you

when you're married, really.

You'd be surprised.

Toni keeps them
in the bathroom cabinet,

just under the sink.

Right.

Marion! No!

I'm sorry!

No!

Chris?

-You okay?
-Good old Joanna.

Go on, Joanna.

You go for it, man, alright?

What are you doing?

I'm going home.

Why?

Because Toni
put you up to this.

You sleeping with him?

Sometimes.

I'm not a whore.

I decide who I sleep with,
not Toni.

But he suggested
it might be a good idea

provided you didn't find me
too repulsive, right?

He just wanted you
to be happy.

-He really cares about you.
-I'm really touched.

Chris, what difference
does it make?

Whatever Toni did,

the point is you still
wanted to sleep with me.

I wanted to, but I didn't.

'Cause you were scared.

Possibly, yes!

Isn't that as good
a reason as any?

-Hi.
-Hi.

Joanna found this
in the spare bedroom.

Joanna?

Friend of Kali's?

Want to watch this husband
of yours, Marion.

Right little raver
on the dance floor

when they put the oldies on.

It was his wild streak
that I married him for.

What the hell
are you doing here?

I know what you did.

About what?

That whole bloody little
adolescent game with Joanna.

It wasn't a game.

I was giving you
what you said you wanted,

helping save you from yourself.

If you've said
anything to Marion....

What are you
frightened of, Chris?

Upsetting the whole cozy
little middle-class apple cart?

Losing your perfect wife and
your neat little flower bed?

Have you said anything?

What's happened to you, man?

You've just given up.

Down the line. Come on.

What went wrong?
Paris wasn't that long ago.

It's been nearly
bloody ten years since Paris!

Most of my adult life!

New definition
of the word "adult":

"Time in which
you've sold out."

A few years of freedom,

then back to the safe job
and the tennis club.

Yeah, and yet another triumph

for the bourgeoisie
steamroller!

What are you doing here?!

What the fuck
were you doing with Marion?

-Why don't you ask her?
-I'm asking you!

Well, let's just say Marion

doesn't share
some of your inhibitions.

For Christ's sake,
Chris, stop it!

Stop it, Chris!

Stop it!
Stop it!

Get off!

Stop it! Stop it!

Did you sleep with Toni?

Is that what he said?

Not precisely.

And what do you think?

I want you to tell
me you haven't.

Does it really matter
if I have?

The way you've been behaving
recently I wouldn't have

-thought you cared.
-Of course I care.

He made a pass at me.

More than once.

I turned him down.

But...

I nearly said yes.

Oh, I was tempted.

He happens to be
rather attractive.

I really don't know
what's going through him.

I don't understand him.

Oh, Chris...

you're such
an innocent sometimes.

Don't you see?

He's jealous of you.

Jealous?

Toni's jealous of me?

Yes.

And if you can't see why...

...then we really
have got a problem.

Hello, darling.

Hello, sweetheart.

Good girl.

You alright?

Marion...

...you know Toni's party?

Mm?

Something happened there.

There was this girl.

Well, what's important
is she, um...

tried to get off with me.

I'm glad I'm not the only
person in the world

who finds you attractive.

She really tried quite hard.

I can't say that I blame her.

Just thought you ought to know.

-Is this a confession?
-No.

'Course not.

-You didn't sleep with her?
-No.

I just want to get everything
out in the open,

well, with the circumstances.

But I was wondering...

how would you feel if I had?

Well, I suppose that depends
on the circumstances.

I expect we'll find
out one day.

What?

Well, you'll probably
sleep with someone else

sooner or later.

-It's too interesting not to.
-No.

I don't see why.

I don't think either of us
went into this marriage

with ridiculous expectations,
I mean...

...I do know what it is
to be sexually bored.

Do you?

Are you?

Sometimes...

but mostly not.

The thing is, Chris, it--

it isn't what you think it is.

It doesn't prove anything
and it doesn't

-disprove anything.
-Yeah.

Well, you know, it's...

a hypothetical situation,
anyway, so...

Well, not entirely, I--

Since we're discussing it,
I might as well tell you that

yes, I have been
unfaithful to you once.

And yes, it was only the once.

And no,

I haven't been
tempted to since.

And I don't think
I will be now.

Fuck!

Was that better?

Better than what?

You did sleep with her,
didn't you?

That girl at Toni's party?

I told you.

Well, she was alright,
I suppose.

But who wants fast food
when you can eat at the Ritz?

Listen, I just came
to say good-bye.

-Yeah.
-Yeah,

back to the States, I think.

What are you going to do?

I don't know,

maybe some screenwriting.

Kali's people are
in the film game.

I might, you know...

Going to stay at their
place in Malibu.

It's lovely, yeah.

So, when you coming back?

Oh, I don't know.
I'm leaving it open-ended.

Listen, Chris...

...why don't you come?

You're serious?

Yeah, of course
I'm bloody serious.

Why don't you just
let it all go, huh?

I mean, come on.

Doesn't your heart just sink
at the thought of it all?

Knowing what,
you're going to spend

the rest of your life here?

Knowing how every day
is going to begin and end

day after monotonous
day until what?

You keel over
with a heart attack

well before your time?

The thing you don't
understand, Toni.

The thing I didn't
understand...

is that I like it here.

I like my life.

I'm content.

-Making lists again?
-Yeah.

What about "happy"?

What about it?

When you're drawing
up your lists,

what do you put in the
column next to "happy"?

"Happy:

If not now...

never."

♪ Yearning, we were yearning

♪ Green light blinding
on the rail ♪

♪ Burning, we were burning

♪ And the line unwinding
to the Holy Grail ♪

♪ To the future gleaming
on a blue horizon ♪

♪ And a golden girl
on golden sand ♪

♪ Dreaming, fantasizing

♪ In another world
from Metroland ♪

♪ I've danced in rain,
and I've been Django ♪

♪ And I've got laid,
I've been a rollin' stone ♪

♪ I've been Verlaine,
and I've been Rimbaud ♪

♪ Not afraid to walk alone

♪ And now I take
my midnight ramble ♪

♪ Do I fold or play
what's in my hand? ♪

♪ Oh, what's at stake,
and what's the gamble? ♪

♪ Do I stay in Metroland?

♪ Dreams, yesterday's
laughter ♪

♪ Ghosts and lovers
come back to play ♪

♪ But dreams have
a morning after ♪

♪ And run for cover
in the light of day ♪

♪ I got something real,
worth holding on to ♪

♪ I can belong to
and understand ♪

♪ I've made my deal,
I will go on to ♪

♪ Make my peace
with Metroland ♪

♪ With Metroland

♪ Metroland

♪ Oh, Metroland

♪ In Metroland