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1
00:00:04,805 --> 00:00:06,407
Please.
I raised my children
2
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,176
the same way
my dad raised me.
3
00:00:08,276 --> 00:00:09,877
My father would look at me
and say,
4
00:00:09,977 --> 00:00:13,581
"I brought you into this world,
and I'll take you out."
5
00:00:14,982 --> 00:00:18,586
I didn't know if he was
my father or a hired assassin.
6
00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:21,389
But that
healthy fear of him,
7
00:00:21,489 --> 00:00:22,822
that's what kept me in check.
8
00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:25,958
Okay, but today's
parents are evolving.
9
00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:27,895
You can't expect your kids
to continue to be
10
00:00:27,995 --> 00:00:29,663
the Neanderthal that you are.
11
00:00:29,763 --> 00:00:32,465
"Me like meat. No like father."
12
00:00:32,466 --> 00:00:34,568
(laughing)
13
00:00:37,205 --> 00:00:38,572
Yeah, I agree with Dr. Reed.
14
00:00:38,672 --> 00:00:40,007
I mean, why can't you be
friends with your kids?
15
00:00:40,108 --> 00:00:41,475
Because it doesn't work.
16
00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:43,077
Maybe for you.
17
00:00:43,177 --> 00:00:44,745
I don't think any kid should be
afraid of their parent.
18
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:45,812
NINA:
Damon Junior!
19
00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:47,180
(shrieks)
20
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:48,882
You mean like you're
afraid of your wife?
21
00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:50,251
He's too quick. Trip him!
22
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:51,219
IVY:
Hello?
23
00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:52,920
We're on the air.
24
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,089
You're so fast, buddy.
25
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:57,625
You know how I do.
Yeah.
26
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,195
Mm, mm, mm, ah!
(chuckles)
27
00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:03,497
Ow!
28
00:01:03,597 --> 00:01:06,833
Okay. So, what did Trey do now?
29
00:01:06,834 --> 00:01:08,102
I told him to clean his room
30
00:01:08,236 --> 00:01:10,571
and instead, he took
all of his belongings
31
00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,573
and just threw them
in the trash.
32
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:15,508
She said, "Get rid of the mess."
33
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:16,777
So I did.
34
00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:18,912
Okay. Let me see you
35
00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:20,680
"friend" your way out
of this one.
36
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:22,783
Watch me.
37
00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:24,918
Hey, buddy.
Um, did your mom
38
00:01:25,052 --> 00:01:26,620
tell you to do something?
39
00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:28,356
Yeah, but you know
how Nina be tripping.
40
00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:30,491
She do be tripping!
(laughing)
41
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:31,492
She do.
42
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:32,960
Women, am I right?
43
00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:36,563
But... (clears throat)
she's still your mother.
44
00:01:36,564 --> 00:01:38,766
Right? And she told
you to do something.
45
00:01:38,899 --> 00:01:41,101
So, why don't you take the
stuff out of the trash can
46
00:01:41,235 --> 00:01:43,003
and put it back in
your room, okay, pal?
47
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,904
But I have a mandatory
48
00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:48,176
Call of Duty meeting
at 5:00, so...
49
00:01:48,276 --> 00:01:50,144
why don't you do it, Damon?
50
00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:53,045
I mean, if it's mandatory,
51
00:01:53,046 --> 00:01:54,615
I got to...
52
00:01:54,748 --> 00:01:56,984
What? It's mandatory, Dad.
53
00:01:58,986 --> 00:02:00,154
Come with me.
54
00:02:01,889 --> 00:02:03,791
You let your son
call you "Damon"?
55
00:02:03,891 --> 00:02:05,293
Yeah, that's my name.
(chuckling)
56
00:02:05,393 --> 00:02:06,394
You gave it to me.
57
00:02:06,494 --> 00:02:07,995
Look at this guy.
He had to work.
58
00:02:09,230 --> 00:02:12,132
You know, I didn't know
my father even had a name.
59
00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:15,336
His tombstone says,
"Here lies Sir."
60
00:02:16,837 --> 00:02:17,905
IVY:
Junior,
61
00:02:18,005 --> 00:02:20,140
kids need structure
and rules.
62
00:02:20,241 --> 00:02:21,941
That's what I'm
talking about.
63
00:02:21,942 --> 00:02:25,111
But they also need a safe space
and a loving support system.
64
00:02:25,112 --> 00:02:28,148
Ha! In your face, baldy!
65
00:02:28,282 --> 00:02:29,683
(imitating record scratching)
66
00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:32,285
No, in your face.
67
00:02:32,286 --> 00:02:34,455
It starts with him
calling you "Damon"
68
00:02:34,555 --> 00:02:36,290
and it ends with him
calling you collect
69
00:02:36,390 --> 00:02:37,658
from Rikers Island.
70
00:02:38,626 --> 00:02:41,595
God, Dad, you are so old-school
with your parenting.
71
00:02:41,695 --> 00:02:42,663
Besides, everyone knows
72
00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:44,198
inmates have cell phones now.
73
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:46,667
Do you know where they keep
those cell phones?
74
00:02:47,935 --> 00:02:49,903
♪ Hot Pocket. ♪
75
00:02:53,274 --> 00:02:54,242
Okay...
76
00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:55,709
This is clearly
77
00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:57,110
a father-son moment,
78
00:02:57,211 --> 00:02:59,413
so I'm gonna head
to the kitchen.
79
00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:00,748
Okay.
80
00:03:03,251 --> 00:03:06,053
You see that? She's always
touching all over me.
81
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,288
I think she likes me.
82
00:03:07,388 --> 00:03:10,491
Dad... (chuckling)
no one likes you.
83
00:03:11,292 --> 00:03:12,760
It's all
in your head, man.
No, I'm telling you.
84
00:03:12,860 --> 00:03:15,563
She's always looking at
me with the googly eyes.
85
00:03:16,864 --> 00:03:18,732
I think those are just her eyes.
86
00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:21,702
No, even at the podcast.
87
00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:22,903
Every time I look up,
88
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,705
she's looking at me like this.
89
00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:27,139
(chuckles)
90
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:28,475
She's sitting
right across from you.
91
00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:30,077
She's waiting for you
to finish talking.
92
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:31,879
I know what I know.
93
00:03:31,979 --> 00:03:33,146
Junior!
94
00:03:33,247 --> 00:03:34,415
Ah!
95
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:36,049
I just got a call
from the school.
96
00:03:36,149 --> 00:03:38,185
Did you know that Trey pulled
the fire alarm yesterday?
97
00:03:38,286 --> 00:03:40,454
They had to evacuate
the whole school.
98
00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:42,723
(robotic voice):
Collect call
99
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:46,294
from inmate number 5512775.
100
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:48,896
Okay. Teach me how to daddy.
101
00:03:49,029 --> 00:03:51,565
Don't ever say it
like that again.
102
00:03:53,267 --> 00:03:55,469
♪ Poppa's ♪
103
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:57,037
♪ House ♪
104
00:03:57,137 --> 00:03:58,170
♪ Yeah. ♪
105
00:03:58,171 --> 00:03:59,407
Okay.
106
00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:01,241
Day one, "Jerk Training."
107
00:04:01,342 --> 00:04:02,976
You ready?
Yeah, yeah. I'm ready.
108
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,244
Yeah, uh, Nina said
109
00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:08,248
I need to, uh, "vadge up,"
whatever that means.
110
00:04:08,349 --> 00:04:09,917
Can you teach me
how to vadge up?
111
00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:12,286
I cannot teach you
how to "vadge up"
112
00:04:12,420 --> 00:04:15,289
but I can teach you
how to ball down.
113
00:04:16,557 --> 00:04:18,392
Okay, you ready to begin?
114
00:04:18,492 --> 00:04:19,726
Yeah, um...
115
00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:22,162
Get me a glass of milk.
Something delicious.
116
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:23,196
JUNIOR:
Wait.
117
00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:26,099
Is that my house?
Yes.
118
00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:28,436
Are you spying on me?
Yes.
119
00:04:28,536 --> 00:04:30,170
I put cameras in your house
120
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:33,106
so that I can observe
your parenting style.
121
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,141
Oh.
Okay?
122
00:04:34,241 --> 00:04:35,676
So let's go to the tape.
123
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:44,418
You call that milk?
124
00:04:45,152 --> 00:04:47,455
Okay. So, what did
you do wrong there?
125
00:04:47,588 --> 00:04:48,822
Mm-hmm. I see it, I see it.
126
00:04:48,922 --> 00:04:50,123
Yeah, I gave him two percent,
127
00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:51,825
he likes that full-fat stuff.
128
00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:54,528
No!
129
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:55,863
He didn't ask you for milk.
130
00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:57,631
He ordered you to give him milk.
131
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,900
You're the parent.
You order him.
132
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:03,136
Yeah, but I'm just, like,
not the ordering kind of guy.
133
00:05:03,270 --> 00:05:04,271
You know?
134
00:05:04,372 --> 00:05:05,639
(sighs) Okay, fine.
135
00:05:05,739 --> 00:05:06,739
You know who is?
136
00:05:06,740 --> 00:05:07,875
(with accent): Tony.
137
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:10,143
Tony? Who's Tony?
138
00:05:10,277 --> 00:05:11,812
You remember when
you was a kid,
139
00:05:11,945 --> 00:05:15,448
and that kid Donald McLorey
pantsed you in the hallway
140
00:05:15,449 --> 00:05:16,650
in front of everybody?
141
00:05:16,750 --> 00:05:18,552
What'd you do?
Oh, yeah.
142
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,888
I became, uh, Tony Provolone-y.
143
00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:23,190
Yeah. The big cheese.
144
00:05:23,290 --> 00:05:25,258
My tough guy persona
that I created...
Yeah.
145
00:05:25,359 --> 00:05:29,261
♪ In my musical theatre class! ♪
146
00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:30,864
(panting)
147
00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:37,371
How are you even my son?
148
00:05:37,505 --> 00:05:39,507
Let's go back to Tony.
Right.
149
00:05:39,607 --> 00:05:42,309
Okay? What did
Tony tell Donald?
150
00:05:42,410 --> 00:05:44,211
Oh, I-I said, um,
I said to him, I said,
151
00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:45,879
(with accent):
"Hey, Donald-sh.
152
00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:48,649
"You pulled the wrong guy's
pants down yesterday.
153
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:49,817
"And today?
154
00:05:49,917 --> 00:05:52,319
"I'm gonna pull your pants down.
155
00:05:52,420 --> 00:05:53,521
"Matter of fact,
156
00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:56,390
"I'm pulling everybody's
pants down in here.
157
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,025
"I'm pulling your pants down!
158
00:05:58,158 --> 00:05:59,527
"I'm pulling your pants down.
159
00:05:59,660 --> 00:06:01,829
I'm pulling your pants down."
160
00:06:01,929 --> 00:06:03,230
Hey!
161
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:09,570
What are you doing, Damon?
162
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:11,805
Damon? Who's Damon?
163
00:06:11,905 --> 00:06:13,874
I don't know no Damon.
I'm Tony, all right?
164
00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:16,877
Tony don't take none
from nobody-sh.
165
00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:18,546
Tony "The Jerk,"
he wears tight shirts
166
00:06:18,679 --> 00:06:19,846
and a black leather jacket
167
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:20,813
with no socks.
168
00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:21,982
I like it.
Yeah.
169
00:06:22,082 --> 00:06:22,916
Yeah.
Yeah.
170
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:24,317
He's got a switchblade
171
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:26,454
in his back pocket,
except it's a comb.
172
00:06:26,554 --> 00:06:27,820
I'm following you.
173
00:06:27,821 --> 00:06:29,222
I like it, I like it.
Yeah. Yeah.
174
00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:31,091
And if someone's really
pissing him off...
175
00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:32,125
Okay, what do you do?
176
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:33,494
Like, really pissing him off?
177
00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:34,661
What do you do?
178
00:06:34,662 --> 00:06:36,696
(raspy voice):
You dance at him!
179
00:06:36,697 --> 00:06:38,999
(snapping rhythmically)
180
00:06:40,333 --> 00:06:42,035
You look him right
in the eyes,
181
00:06:42,135 --> 00:06:44,972
and you dance at him!
182
00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:51,612
No! There's no dancing.
183
00:06:51,712 --> 00:06:53,146
This is not West Side Story.
184
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:56,348
This is more Good Fellas.
Joe Pesci.
185
00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:57,785
Oh, Good Fellas. Got it.
186
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,019
All right. It's like, uh...
187
00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:00,153
(with accent):
Do I amuse you?
188
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,122
Am I funny to you?
189
00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:04,725
How is my dancing funny to you?!
190
00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:06,093
That's it!
191
00:07:06,193 --> 00:07:08,462
I'm gonna dance
your sweet little pants
192
00:07:08,596 --> 00:07:09,930
right off, right now!
193
00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:12,833
Hey! How did you do that?
194
00:07:13,601 --> 00:07:15,803
I don't know.
I just kind of go like this.
195
00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,705
(snaps)
(mumbles)
196
00:07:18,539 --> 00:07:20,207
Would you stop doing that?
197
00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:22,309
Just know I got them holstered.
198
00:07:22,409 --> 00:07:24,211
Look, Junior.
199
00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:27,547
Tony is not a dancer.
He's a mobster.
200
00:07:27,548 --> 00:07:28,649
A mobster.
201
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,117
Tough guy.
Tough guy.
202
00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:31,919
Like, dangerous.
Yes. Yes.
203
00:07:32,019 --> 00:07:33,720
Like-like Al Pacino.
204
00:07:33,721 --> 00:07:35,789
Tony Soprano.
Mm-hmm.
205
00:07:35,889 --> 00:07:37,024
Bad guy.
Yeah.
206
00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:40,327
Yeah. By day, he's
busting kneecaps.
207
00:07:40,427 --> 00:07:43,664
But at night,
he's busting moves!
208
00:07:50,504 --> 00:07:51,437
Bop.
209
00:07:51,438 --> 00:07:53,740
Hey! Get out.
210
00:07:53,741 --> 00:07:55,008
Get out!
211
00:08:03,851 --> 00:08:05,218
My-My, do you know
212
00:08:05,352 --> 00:08:07,755
how excited Mommy is
for the dance recital?
213
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:10,858
Yeah. You can't stop
talking about it.
214
00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:12,358
Okay, look.
215
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:15,262
I know usually Mommy can be
a little controlling,
216
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:19,733
and my personality can be
a bit Type A... plus.
217
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:22,235
But today, I'm fun Mommy!
218
00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:23,771
(laughing)
219
00:08:25,573 --> 00:08:27,575
That's a really long laugh.
220
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:31,011
Say you're fun Mommy again,
and I'll try not to laugh.
221
00:08:31,111 --> 00:08:33,246
I'm a fun M--
(laughs)
222
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:38,318
I couldn't do it.
223
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:41,088
Now, come on.
224
00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:42,289
Show me your dance.
225
00:08:42,389 --> 00:08:43,724
Why don't I just surprise you
226
00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:45,057
while I'm on stage?
227
00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:47,427
It's my dance that I created.
228
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,162
Of course, baby,
it is your dance,
229
00:08:49,262 --> 00:08:51,264
but you have
to show Mommy the steps
230
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:54,602
so I can improve them...
I mean, I mean,
231
00:08:54,702 --> 00:08:57,437
give you constructive criticism.
232
00:08:58,238 --> 00:08:59,539
Did Mommy ever tell you
233
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,342
I was almost a professional
ice-skater?
234
00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:06,713
Every day.
235
00:09:06,714 --> 00:09:10,549
And then somebody hit your knees
with a bat so you quit.
236
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,152
No, that was Nancy Kerrigan,
237
00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:13,621
and it was a pipe.
238
00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:16,456
Look, you need to
really practice this
239
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,692
so you can beat
all the other losers
240
00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:20,160
and win first place.
241
00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:23,797
I don't care about winning.
I just want to have fun.
242
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:24,998
Winning is fun!
243
00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:26,667
Now go on...
244
00:09:26,767 --> 00:09:28,067
Wow me.
245
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:30,170
(upbeat dance music playing)
246
00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:40,180
(squealing)
247
00:09:40,981 --> 00:09:43,250
Maya, that was amazing!
248
00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,653
I just have a few notes.
249
00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:48,388
Where's a pipe when I need one?
250
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:52,392
♪ ♪
251
00:09:53,226 --> 00:09:54,762
Touching. Touching.
252
00:09:54,862 --> 00:09:57,497
There's nothing
about touching in here.
253
00:09:58,298 --> 00:09:59,700
What's up, Pop?
254
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,201
Hey. What's up, son?
255
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:02,235
How'd it go?
256
00:10:02,335 --> 00:10:03,671
Oh, great.
Yeah?
257
00:10:03,771 --> 00:10:05,839
You're gonna stick
with that, huh?
Yup.
258
00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:07,207
Okay.
259
00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:09,710
All right. Well, then,
let's go to the tape.
260
00:10:11,278 --> 00:10:12,779
Oh, you-you recorded
that one, too?
261
00:10:12,780 --> 00:10:14,181
I absolutely did.
262
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:19,052
(with accent):
Hey. What did I tell you
about cleaning your room?
263
00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:20,688
After this level, Damon.
264
00:10:20,788 --> 00:10:22,189
Oh, well,
that's enough of that.
265
00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:24,490
We don't need to see
the rest of that.
266
00:10:24,491 --> 00:10:25,992
Yeah, we don't need to see
the rest of it
267
00:10:25,993 --> 00:10:27,260
'cause I watched it all.
268
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:31,231
I told you to go over there
and be his father.
269
00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:32,532
To be tough.
270
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,902
No, you want me to be you,
and I'm not.
271
00:10:35,002 --> 00:10:38,038
Nor do I ever want to be.
Dad, you were a tyrant.
272
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,306
No, I was stern.
273
00:10:39,406 --> 00:10:40,607
I didn't let you
get away with anything.
274
00:10:40,708 --> 00:10:42,141
Yeah, you yelled
at me for everything.
275
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:43,911
That's all you remember,
but you don't remember
276
00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:45,879
what you did to get yelled at.
277
00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:47,380
You are raising
278
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:48,949
a boy to be a man,
279
00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:51,418
and you got to teach him
respect and boundaries,
280
00:10:51,518 --> 00:10:54,186
because life is not gonna
love him like you do.
281
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:57,557
Well, Dad, I was terrified
of you my entire childhood.
282
00:10:57,691 --> 00:10:58,625
I couldn't
talk with you,
283
00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:00,527
I couldn't reason with you.
284
00:11:00,627 --> 00:11:02,528
It was like living
with a drill sergeant.
285
00:11:02,529 --> 00:11:04,297
No, it was like
living with a father.
286
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:06,266
And the way
I saw it is,
287
00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,034
I got to teach you lessons,
288
00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:10,369
otherwise life
is gonna teach you lessons.
289
00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:11,939
Yeah, well, I don't want
my son to resent me
290
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:13,640
the way I resent you.
291
00:11:15,776 --> 00:11:17,410
You resent me?
292
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,780
(scoffs)
293
00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:21,614
I don't want to talk about it.
294
00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:31,825
Now, your hands
are an extension of the body.
295
00:11:31,925 --> 00:11:35,495
They should come up and through
in one fluid motion.
296
00:11:35,595 --> 00:11:37,164
You kind of just...
297
00:11:37,264 --> 00:11:40,167
did it like this,
like a newborn baby T.rex.
298
00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:44,037
Mom, you said this is fun.
This is the opposite of fun.
299
00:11:44,171 --> 00:11:46,339
(sighs)
Listen, baby.
300
00:11:47,107 --> 00:11:48,608
Mommy almost went
to the Olympics,
301
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:51,811
but I didn't take it seriously,
and because of that,
302
00:11:51,812 --> 00:11:52,846
I got injured.
303
00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:54,347
And then my life changed.
304
00:11:54,447 --> 00:11:56,615
I don't want you
to have the same regrets.
305
00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:59,219
I don't know what regrets are,
306
00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:01,688
but I think I'm gonna
have one now.
307
00:12:01,789 --> 00:12:03,656
(laughs)
308
00:12:03,757 --> 00:12:05,291
Oh, you're hilarious.
309
00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:07,794
Now, a-five, six, seven, eight.
310
00:12:07,795 --> 00:12:09,829
(screams)
311
00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:11,464
♪ ♪
312
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,133
Everything okay?
313
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,936
Yeah, I'm fine.
Everything's good.
314
00:12:16,804 --> 00:12:18,371
You want to talk?
315
00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:20,740
Why is everything
talking with you?
316
00:12:20,874 --> 00:12:23,576
I'm a psychologist.
317
00:12:24,912 --> 00:12:26,478
All right, you don't want
to talk? Let's not talk.
318
00:12:26,479 --> 00:12:29,749
Wait a minute, did you just do
that reverse psychology on me?
319
00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:32,651
Because now, all of a sudden,
I want to talk.
320
00:12:32,652 --> 00:12:34,353
Okay.
321
00:12:34,354 --> 00:12:36,488
I'm listening.
322
00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:37,690
All right.
323
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:40,227
I just found out
that Junior hates me.
324
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:42,495
What? Why would you even
think that?
325
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,563
Because we were talking
326
00:12:43,696 --> 00:12:45,531
about how he was raised
327
00:12:45,532 --> 00:12:48,068
and what a "tyrant" I was
328
00:12:48,168 --> 00:12:50,237
and how now he resents me.
329
00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:52,004
Okay, well, "tyrant" tracks.
330
00:12:52,005 --> 00:12:53,273
Listen,
331
00:12:53,406 --> 00:12:56,243
resent and hate
are two different things.
332
00:12:56,343 --> 00:12:57,277
I resent you,
333
00:12:57,410 --> 00:12:59,312
but I don't hate you.
334
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:03,215
That's funny, because I hate you
but I don't resent you.
335
00:13:03,216 --> 00:13:06,086
Mm. I know you're kidding.
336
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:07,720
You love me.
337
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,591
Listen, Poppa,
338
00:13:11,691 --> 00:13:14,127
when someone you love
is truthful like that,
339
00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:16,096
they are giving you
an opportunity.
340
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:17,097
For what?
341
00:13:17,197 --> 00:13:19,099
To improve the relationship.
342
00:13:19,199 --> 00:13:21,367
But I thought we had
a great relationship.
343
00:13:21,368 --> 00:13:22,635
You do.
344
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:24,271
And you have a great son.
345
00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:28,008
But there is always room to
improve any relationship.
346
00:13:29,109 --> 00:13:30,878
The door is open.
347
00:13:30,978 --> 00:13:32,645
The question is,
348
00:13:32,745 --> 00:13:34,982
are you gonna go through it?
349
00:13:38,185 --> 00:13:42,155
What exact door
are we talking about?
350
00:13:42,289 --> 00:13:44,224
You're a smart man.
351
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:45,825
Figure it out.
352
00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:49,162
♪ ♪
353
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:53,065
Honey, I need you
to do carpool on Tuesday
354
00:13:53,066 --> 00:13:54,634
because I have the--
355
00:13:54,734 --> 00:13:57,370
Trey, I thought I took
that controller away from you
356
00:13:57,470 --> 00:13:58,805
for pulling the fire alarm.
357
00:13:58,906 --> 00:14:01,240
You did, but I know
all your hiding places
358
00:14:01,241 --> 00:14:03,543
because we're the same height.
359
00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:05,913
Are you dumb?
360
00:14:06,013 --> 00:14:07,147
Shut up, Maya.
361
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,149
Do not tell your sister
to shut up.
362
00:14:09,249 --> 00:14:13,153
She keep blabbing
her big mouth like you, stupid.
363
00:14:14,321 --> 00:14:15,955
Who are you talking to?
364
00:14:15,956 --> 00:14:17,824
Why you tripping, Damon?
365
00:14:17,925 --> 00:14:19,259
I'm tripping because
that is my wife,
366
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:21,028
and I don't like how
you're speaking to her.
367
00:14:21,128 --> 00:14:23,196
But...
No buts. I brought
you in this world
368
00:14:23,330 --> 00:14:25,332
and I will take you out
if you ever disrespect
369
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:26,766
your mother like that again.
370
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,501
Do you hear me?
371
00:14:28,601 --> 00:14:29,768
Apologize to her.
372
00:14:29,769 --> 00:14:31,470
I'm sorry, Mom.
373
00:14:31,471 --> 00:14:34,341
Now put that thing
down and go to bed.
374
00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:35,675
Yes, Dad.
375
00:14:36,309 --> 00:14:37,444
Sir.
376
00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:46,719
Where's my apology?
377
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:49,222
Got it.
378
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,525
Come on, honey.
379
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:54,361
Go upstairs, okay?
380
00:14:57,430 --> 00:14:58,798
Wow.
381
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,533
Thank you, honey.
382
00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:02,468
I always knew
you had that in you.
383
00:15:02,469 --> 00:15:04,904
I-I can't believe it worked.
You saw his face?
384
00:15:05,005 --> 00:15:07,740
He was so scared.
He was frightened.
385
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,242
(laughs):
That was crazy.
386
00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:10,577
When he called you stupid,
I was like, "What?"
387
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:12,245
I was like, "Oh, my God."
388
00:15:12,345 --> 00:15:13,646
But you know,
389
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,048
you did it with love.
390
00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:17,350
Mm.
391
00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:19,185
Love's a kissing word.
392
00:15:19,186 --> 00:15:20,253
Oh.
393
00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:22,354
Well, then, I love...
394
00:15:22,355 --> 00:15:24,391
love, love...
395
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,226
Mm.
...you.
396
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:27,394
Aww.
397
00:15:27,494 --> 00:15:29,429
♪ ♪
398
00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,465
(gasps)
399
00:15:32,565 --> 00:15:36,569
Honey, you look adorable.
400
00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:39,672
I look ridiculous,
and I'm not doing this.
401
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:41,208
Come on, honey,
402
00:15:41,308 --> 00:15:42,775
we're doing this for you.
403
00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:44,877
No, we're doing this for you.
404
00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:47,147
And you ruined it for me.
405
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:52,019
Did I really?
Yes,
406
00:15:52,119 --> 00:15:55,855
and I don't think I'll be able
to dance ever again.
407
00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:58,291
I'm sorry, baby.
408
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:00,960
Those weren't my intentions.
409
00:16:01,061 --> 00:16:03,195
Mommy can be such
a knucklehead sometimes.
410
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:04,764
ANNOUNCER:
Okay, coming to the stage,
411
00:16:04,897 --> 00:16:09,002
Maya Fulton and her mom,
an almost-Olympic gold medalist.
412
00:16:11,938 --> 00:16:13,239
Okay, okay, come on, let's go.
413
00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:14,341
Ow!
414
00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:16,309
What happened, Mommy?
415
00:16:16,409 --> 00:16:18,045
I think I just twisted my ankle.
416
00:16:18,145 --> 00:16:20,079
I can't go on.
417
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,382
I think you're gonna
have to do this without me.
418
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,984
Okay, well, you might want
to put an ice pack on it.
419
00:16:25,118 --> 00:16:26,453
Yeah, okay.
420
00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:31,491
I saw that.
421
00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:34,027
You gave up your moment.
422
00:16:34,961 --> 00:16:35,995
It was her moment.
423
00:16:36,096 --> 00:16:38,298
Keep that outfit on for tonight.
424
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:39,799
You better have
an outfit on, too.
425
00:16:39,932 --> 00:16:42,135
Oh, I'm gonna.
(chuckles)
426
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:43,569
(applause)
427
00:16:43,570 --> 00:16:45,838
(upbeat dance music playing)
428
00:16:49,109 --> 00:16:50,610
NINA:
Ooh.
429
00:16:58,751 --> 00:17:01,287
(cheering, applause)
430
00:17:01,288 --> 00:17:02,489
Yes!
431
00:17:02,589 --> 00:17:06,526
That's my daughter!
432
00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,329
♪ ♪
433
00:17:11,998 --> 00:17:13,266
Hey.
Oh.
434
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:14,633
Hey, I was, uh,
435
00:17:14,634 --> 00:17:16,469
just coming over there
to talk to you.
436
00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,271
Right, yeah, I was just, uh,
I was coming over here
437
00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:19,572
to talk to you.
Yeah.
438
00:17:19,672 --> 00:17:21,140
So, I...
(stammers)
439
00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:23,110
Well, I was gonna s...
Yeah, you didn't...
440
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:25,245
If you...
You want to go first?
441
00:17:25,345 --> 00:17:27,347
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, that sounds right.
442
00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:30,850
Look, son, I-I can't
change the past.
443
00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:32,719
And if I could go back in time,
444
00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:35,255
I probably wouldn't have
divorced your mom.
445
00:17:35,355 --> 00:17:37,190
I mean, unfortunately,
446
00:17:37,290 --> 00:17:41,060
you grew up in two different
houses with two sets of rules.
447
00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:45,064
Her house was Disneyland,
my house was boot camp.
448
00:17:45,165 --> 00:17:47,200
Eh, more like Guantanamo Bay,
449
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:48,735
Dante's Inferno,
450
00:17:48,835 --> 00:17:50,270
that place where
they held the big guy
451
00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:51,938
from Green Mile, you know?
452
00:17:52,038 --> 00:17:55,841
Look, the point is,
all the structure was gone
453
00:17:55,842 --> 00:17:57,509
and I had to compensate.
454
00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:58,678
Your mother was afraid.
455
00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:00,146
She'd call me up panicked
456
00:18:00,147 --> 00:18:02,081
because you were a teenage boy
457
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:05,218
and you were acting out
and she couldn't control you.
458
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:07,754
Like Trey.
Hmm.
459
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:10,223
And so, I had to be the bad guy.
460
00:18:10,323 --> 00:18:11,424
Look, Dad,
I appreciate everything
461
00:18:11,558 --> 00:18:13,460
you're saying right now, but...
462
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:14,826
I'm a dad, too.
463
00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:15,728
You know?
464
00:18:15,828 --> 00:18:16,929
I get it.
465
00:18:17,029 --> 00:18:18,598
I took a stand with Trey
the other day
466
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:21,634
and I got to admit, you know,
I see some differences.
467
00:18:21,734 --> 00:18:23,702
(chuckles)
You know, he's
doing chores now,
468
00:18:23,703 --> 00:18:26,939
he's cleaning up his room,
he calls me sir,
469
00:18:27,039 --> 00:18:28,074
which is crazy, 'cause, like,
470
00:18:28,175 --> 00:18:29,476
that's your dad's name.
471
00:18:30,743 --> 00:18:33,045
No, that's a sign of respect.
472
00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:34,614
So, how does it feel?
473
00:18:34,747 --> 00:18:36,283
It feels pretty good.
474
00:18:36,416 --> 00:18:40,086
Okay, hang on to that feeling,
because you crossed a line.
475
00:18:40,187 --> 00:18:42,088
You cannot go back
and be his friend,
476
00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:45,258
otherwise you'll undo
all the progress you've made.
477
00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:47,360
Right. Until he has kids,
then...
478
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:48,661
Ah.
...then things change, right?
479
00:18:48,761 --> 00:18:50,862
Then it gets fun.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
480
00:18:50,863 --> 00:18:53,600
(chuckles)
481
00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:55,802
Hey, I just, um,
want to say sorry
482
00:18:55,902 --> 00:18:58,238
for saying I resent you...
Mm.
483
00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:02,709
What the heck was that?
484
00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:04,110
You said sorry.
That's a kissing word.
485
00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:05,377
That's what you taught me.
486
00:19:05,378 --> 00:19:06,646
Well...
487
00:19:06,779 --> 00:19:08,047
Mm.
488
00:19:09,249 --> 00:19:10,716
(laughs):
What was that for?
489
00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:12,185
Kissing's a kissing word, too.
490
00:19:13,052 --> 00:19:14,053
That's it!
491
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:16,456
(both laugh)
492
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:18,891
I'm proud of you, son.
I love you.
493
00:19:19,759 --> 00:19:21,361
Oh, and, um,
494
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:24,331
thanks for making me a man.
495
00:19:32,605 --> 00:19:34,507
I take it all back!
496
00:19:36,409 --> 00:19:37,710
What?
497
00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:43,415
Nothing, Billy Porter. Go.
498
00:19:43,416 --> 00:19:45,117
All right.
499
00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,087
♪ ♪
500
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:56,996
CREW MEMBER: Marker.
I don't care about winning,
501
00:19:57,096 --> 00:19:58,231
I care about playing.
502
00:19:58,331 --> 00:19:59,799
It's okay. It's...
503
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:02,068
DIRECTOR:
"No, Mom, I don't care
about winning, I just..."
504
00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:05,572
(with accent):
Oh, my God.
505
00:20:05,672 --> 00:20:07,874
Tina's wide awake.
506
00:20:07,974 --> 00:20:10,743
(with accent):
Ooh, I like a good-time Tina.
507
00:20:10,843 --> 00:20:12,379
The one that works
at the laundromat.
508
00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:14,347
Yeah, the one with
all the quarters.
509
00:20:14,447 --> 00:20:16,683
And hopefully,
you're not on your last load.
510
00:20:16,783 --> 00:20:18,551
Oh, I am not!
511
00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:19,519
Ha, ha, ha.
512
00:20:19,652 --> 00:20:21,020
I got a nice roll of quarters
513
00:20:21,153 --> 00:20:22,522
for you right now.
514
00:20:22,622 --> 00:20:25,858
Ooh, make them half-dollars
and we got a deal, baby.
515
00:20:25,958 --> 00:20:28,861
Ooh, I can feel the inflation
setting in right now.
516
00:20:28,961 --> 00:20:31,162
Ooh.
You're greedy.
517
00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,164
I'm gonna take you upstairs
518
00:20:33,165 --> 00:20:35,133
and dance with you.
Oh, yeah?
519
00:20:35,134 --> 00:20:36,636
You're gonna dance with me?
520
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:38,371
I'm gonna look you
right in the eye
521
00:20:38,471 --> 00:20:41,641
and disappoint you.
Ooh.
522
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:44,076
Yeah! Yeah!
523
00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:52,319
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
524
00:20:52,419 --> 00:20:55,988
and TOYOTA.
525
00:20:56,088 --> 00:21:00,493
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
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