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♪ Hollywood

♪ We're going to see
Garbo and Gable

♪ We're through with that 7

♪ Waiting on tables ♪

♪ Everyone says
that we are able ♪

♪ To be understood
out in Hollywood

♪ Good-bye, good-bye,
good-bye, pal &

♪ We must bid you adieu ♪

♪ Good-bye, good-bye,
good-bye, pal &

♪ I'll be sighing over you ♪

♪ So long, ta ta, cheerio ♪

♪ Think of us when you go ♪

♪ Until then, once again ♪

♪ Good-bye, pal »

♪ Out where they
say, let us be gay ♪

♪ I'm going Hollywood 7

♪ I'll ballyhoo &

♪ Greetings to you ♪

♪ I'm going Hollywood 7

♪ Say, while you sleepyheads 7

♪ Are in that hay ♪

♪ I'll be dancing ♪»

♪ I'm gonna be dancing
with a sun-kissed baby

♪ And I'm on my way ♪

♪ Here's my beret 7

♪ I'm going Hollywood 7

- You know who would be
perfect to direct this,

and it kills me to say it,

because I don't relish the
idea of working with him,

but my ex-husband.

- Val?

- Val's perfect.

He's perfect, given
this material.

- She's right.

This is his kinda story.

- Look, I love Val, I love him.

But with all due respect,

he's a raving,
incompetent, psychotic.

- He's not incompetent.

- They should lock him up
and throw away the key.

And please, don't take
that the wrong way.

- Forget it.

We're gonna wind up $20
million over budget,

and maybe no picture to boot.

- That's right.

I did a picture with him
when I was at Firestone.

He didn't even finish the movie.

I was
there at Firestone.

- He had a nervous breakdown.

- Wait a minute, he was
under a lot of stress.

We had just broken up.

- Honey, he was
fired off a picture

here at Galaxie just
before I took over.

They said his demands
were outrageous.

- He's a perfectionist.

- The light had to be perfect.

The sun had to be just right.

He demanded that they
replace the leading lady.

He wanted to reshoot the
dailies every other day.

He fired the cameraman.

Finally, he came
down with shingles.

They shut down the picture

and found another
director to finish it.

- You don't have to
tell me about that.

I was married to
him at the time.

- Then you should remember.

- That was ten years ago, Hal.

- His best pictures
were ten years ago.

Then he became a real artiste
you know, they always do.

- Look, look.

I am the last person to
defend that craziness

because it drove me nuts.

But Val cares about movies,

and he was born to
do this material.

- Ellie, what are
we discussing here?

Shingles, headaches.

Why open a can of worms?

- But he's mellowed.

I'm telling you.

Who better to direct this?

The streets of New
York are in his marrow.

- Let me just say this, Ruth.

Yes, Ruth.

- No way!

- God!

- What about him?

He's great.

I know we could get him.

- Boring.

- He'd be safe.

- He'd be a lot more
expensive than Val.

- We can put our
foot on his neck.

Martin Ruth.

- That's true.

Val hasn't worked
in a lot of years.

We could make a good deal.

- All you have to do is
watch him like a hawk.

- We're gonna lose, we're
gonna lose a lot more with Val.

- I agree with Ellie.

I think he's the ideal
director for this project.

But we're not gonna use him.

- Right.

- Cause who needs trouble?

- Besides, what makes you think
he'd want to work with us,

given all the personal baggage?

- I'm told that he's in
no position to be fussy.

- I can't stand it here.

What the hell am
I doing in Canada?

Lori, they got moose up here.

Moose.

Are moose carnivorous?

- My God, how could
you be homesick?

You got there yesterday.

You're coming home tomorrow.

- Val?

Val, Val, Val.

We're good to go here.

Waiting on you.

- Did my agent call?

Any word on that TV movie?

The interracial abortion,
gene-splicing thing?

- I think the TV movie decided
to go with Peter Bogdanovich.

- Oh, that's great.

That's just great.

You know, I love Peter.

Peter's a beautiful guy.

God bless him.

- Val!

- Val, the client wants more

overhead coverage
of the spray cans.

- One minute.

Lori, this is humiliating.

I'm up here shooting a
deodorant commercial.

I got two Oscars.

Up here, you don't need
Oscars, you need antlers.

- Here's a funny script about

two kids in a college fraternity

who invent a machine that

can turn women back
into virgins again.

It's very clever.

- What's the matter?

- You know, when you asked me

to come out here for
you, you promised me

that I wasn't just going to be

one of those bright women
who finds properties

and goes to lunch 500
times developing them,

and then never gets one made.

Honey, The City That
Never Sleeps is green-lit.

That's been your
project from day one.

- Yeah, sure.

Until I suggest the director.

And then even though you
admit he'd be perfect for it,

I get shot down.

- You didn't get
shot down, honey.

- I know that that's
a risky choice,

but it's an inspired choice.

- I think you're trying to help
him because you feel guilty.

- Guilty?

- Yes.

- Why should I feel guilty?

Because I fell in love with you?

I mean, God knows I put
enough years in that marriage.

- That's right, you did
absolutely nothing wrong honey.

- I know.

- Nothing.

- I brought up his name because,

because he would give you the
best movie for that script.

Nobody argued that.

- He's probably so angry
he won't even speak to you.

And he's liable to
ruin the picture

just to get even with me.

- No, you're wrong about that,

I'm telling you, you're wrong.

He would be grateful.

He needs a comeback, and--

- Ellie, this is a very,
very expensive film.

It's got solid
box-office potential.

- He can do it.

- You don't regret
leaving him, do you?

- You know, one day you look up

and you realize that
laughs are not enough.

I can handle him, Hal.

I just got tired of
having to all the time.

And then, you know,
then I met you.

- What are you doing home?

- I quit.

- No!

Val, not again.

You quit over nothing again?

- Not over nothing.

- What?

- I quit over a big thing.

- What?

- They fired me.

I thought that was big
enough to quit over.

- Oh, Val!

That's just great.

- I got the last
plane out of Toronto.

Have you ever seen Canada?

Now I know why there's
no crime up there.

Boy, I must say,

you don't seem too
enthused over seeing me.

- Well, can you blame me?

What are you gonna do now?

You're gonna sit
around the apartment,

talking about the good old days.

- I gotta get a picture.

Boy, somebody's got to
take a chance on me.

This is ridiculous.

When you're cold, you're cold.

Fortunately, my business manager

put away enough money
before he went to prison

so I could hold out
another three weeks, maybe.

- Your agent called.

- Hey, you know, if you'd
come up there with me,

it might have been different.

Two people in that sleeping
bag is a lot cozier than one.

- And who goes on
for me in the play?

- For God sakes, it's an
off-off-Broadway play.

You're in the last stages.

Your understudy could
have gone on for you.

- Are you kidding?

My understudy?

Right, and that will
be the one night

that Steven Spielberg
comes to see the play,

or Harvey Weinstein.

- They're not
coming, believe me.

They're fasting.

- I would've been so good
in that Shakespeare movie.

- What's, oh, what's that?

- These are pelts.

I traded with a fur
trapper between shots

so the trip wouldn't
be a total loss.

- Your agent sent
over that script.

- A script?

Why didn't you
tell me about this?

The City That Never Sleeps.

When did this come in?

- Well?

What did you think of it?

- You know, I thought it
had definite potential.

It's got a, you know, really
good Manhattan feel to it.

- You know, they're
interested in you directing.

- You know, that's fine with me.

You know, this is the kind

of material that I
can really do great.

This is, this is, you know,
I can make this script sing.

This is New York, it's
nightclubs, it's the skyline.

You want some water?

- Please.

- I'm very excited.

- Me too.

- Who wants me?

- Well, uh, we have a
little selling to do,

but, uh, Galaxie is making it.

- Hal Yeager?

- Yes, that's right.

- He stole my wife.

- Ellie is the one who's
pushing for you up there.

- Pass, I'm not gonna work
with Hal Yeager and Ellie.

You gotta be kidding,

he's a Philistine
and she's a quisling.

It's a religious conflict.

- Will you calm down?

It's everything you've
been looking for.

- You know, I'm
frankly flabbergasted

they would even think of me.

- Well, they didn't
think of you, she did.

And she has convinced
Yeager to come fly

to New York and take
a meeting with you.

- This guy stole my wife.

- He doesn't hold
that against you.

It's business.

- Can you believe that she
would leave me for Hal Yeager?

I still can't get my mind
around it, Mr. Slick.

The price of his haircut
could feed a family of five.

- Calm down, you're
getting all red.

Would you calm down?

- And you're telling me
she, he doesn't want me?

She's the, the nerve of them.

He's such a manicured phony.

May he, may he fall
on his blow comb

and get hot in the wrong place.

- Please, Val, please don't
do anything to kill this.

It's a golden opportunity.

- Forget it.

I would rather do the geriatric

diaper commercial I turned down.

- Would you?

Because that's what the future
holds if this falls through.

- Of course I wouldn't.

This is a terrific script.

I, you know, I--

- Make some sense now.

A $60 million dollar,
first-class feature film.

A big payday, which you need.

And if you score with this
one, you're back on top.

You'll never have a gift like
this drop in your lap again.

Just take the
meeting with Yeager.

- And Ellie?

- Yes, and Ellie.

I'm telling you, I'll get
you half a million dollars.

- A lousy half-mil
they're offering?

They want to buy prestige

at the Shrine Auditorium
Oscar night for a half-mil?

- There's no offer.

It's not an offer yet.

- I reject their offer.

- There is nothing to reject.

- Well, I reject it anyhow.

- You better meet with him
and you better be nice,

or else I'm out of here.

- I finally get an offer
that's worthy of my gifts,

and look where it comes from.

- There is no offer yet.

And I am so tired of all this,

the big talk about how big
you were ten years ago.

Things change, and
you can't get work.

- You know, part of
me wants it so badly.

- And the other part?

- Also wants it,
that's the problem.

- It only takes one hit.

- I know.

- And I want a
role in this movie.

- I don't have the movie yet.

He's gotta meet me and throw
his weight around first.

- And not just a little bit.

Something where I can
show off what I can do.

- Lori, I can't stick my
girlfriend in the movie.

- I'm not just your girlfriend.

I'm good.

- Remember all those times

I told you you should
take acting lessons?

- I'm a natural.

Classes would ruin me.

- Jesus.

You know, Ellie feels
guilty about dumping me,

so this is her way of
clearing her conscience.

- Great!

What's the difference
how it came about?

- This whole thing
is creepy, Lori.

For God sakes,

this is a woman I was
married to for 10 years.

We made love.

I'd hold her head over the
toilet bowl when she threw up.

- From making love with you?

- Not from making love
with me, from eating sushi.

For God's sakes,
I used to hug her

when she was afraid of flying.

And, you know, I kissed her
on top of the Eiffel Tower.

I swam in the moonlight
with her at Montauk.

Now suddenly I got to
take a meeting with her?

- I don't know.

I've got very mixed feelings.

This guy has really got
to show me he's changed.

- He's not in a position to
make extraordinary demands.

- Because it was over
for him years ago.

He hasn't touched anything
for years, garbage.

I'm telling you, garbage.

I mean, I'm not saying that
as criticism, you know.

- The question is,
do I wanna let this

has been make his comeback
picture on my money?

- He's not a has-been.

He's a very good director

who's fallen on some
difficult times.

- He brought it on himself,
he's his own worst enemy.

- Look, think of the
press angle, you know.

Val Waxman does his comeback
film for Galaxie Pictures.

- What good is the press if
the guy ruins the picture?

- He's not gonna ruin
the picture, he's not.

- No, you're damn right he's
not because I'll fire him.

I'm not going to take
temperamental antics

from some owteur genius.

- Auteur, auteur.

- Whatever.

Okay, auteur.

- You're doing a
jack story, okay?

He can do this film better
than anybody I can think of.

- We'll see.

- You're so nervous,
you're making me nervous.

- I'm not nervous, I'm tense.

- You are nervous.

- I'm tense.

When I'm nervous,
I bite my nails.

When I'm tense, I do
this with my collar.

- Just act, calm down
and act professional.

- I am, I'm fine.

But this is a guy
who stole my wife.

Years ago, I would never

have consented to
make a film for him

and now, now suddenly
I'm auditioning for him?

It's crazy.

You know, I would
kill for this job

but the people I want to kill

are the people who are
offering me the job.

It's just insanity.

- What is that?

- Remember in the cab
I took a blue pill?

- Yeah?

- Well, that was
to calm my anger.

But it had speed in it.

So then I took another
pill after that

to calm down the speed.

Well, this gets me
back up to speed,

where I want to be
actually for the meeting.

- Great, perfect.

- Yeah.

- Then that other pill I took

keeps me dry when
it's raining out.

- Ellie.

- Hello Al.

- Ellie how are you?

- So good to see you.

- Hello, Val.

- Hello, Val.

- Al.

How are you?

- Good to see you.

- Ed.

- I'm so glad you
could get here.

Are they still having
power failures?

I read that there was a terrible

power failure in California.

- Can I get you some coffee?

- Coffee would be wonderful.

- Electricity.

That the electricity
was going off.

- Come on in.

- Since when do you wear suits?

You have any milk?

- You never wore suits.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Uh, cream.

Well, Val, you look very good.

- I'm okay, you know.

I've been having
some back spasms

and I have a torn rotator cuff,

and, my knee, you know,
I got a hearing loss.

It's the oddest thing.

In my left ear--

- What did you
think of the script?

- The script?

You know, the movie that

it's based on was a
stupid little potboilers.

- He's asking about the script.

- But the rewrite is good.

- Thanks to Ellie,
she did all the work.

- Yeah, it's good.

You know, I think
this could make

a kind of tough, gritty,
New York, big city movie.

- You can't make any
money just in big cities.

- Well, I mean, where do you
think this is going to play?

It's not going to appeal

to farmers or shopping
malls in Biloxi.

- Oh, I completely disagree.

I think if this picture
is mounted properly,

it's gonna have
universal appeal.

- Where do you think
the demographics are?

- The demographics?

You mean why the country
got so stupid suddenly?

My theory's fast foods.

- The age group, the
age group of this film.

Where do you see it?

- The age?

This will appeal to, you know,

to adults and
teenagers, young adults,

and, you know, kids,
adolescents, I think.

Toddlers, I imagine.

Newborns.

Our marketing
research shows

this film has wide
appeal for both sexes.

- Yes, I agree and
then some, actually.

But, the script has
some holes in it.

- Val--

- Like what?

- Well, take the
climax, for instance.

I think the climax comes,
comes too early is the problem.

It should come after
the trial scene.

- Didn't I say that?

The inciting event
should come later.

- The character of Benny.

I feel we should shoot Benny

with a hand-held camera
and not a Steadicam.

Benny should be nervous.

It should, you know,

put the audience ill at ease,
like his inner-personality.

- I don't know if I like that.

- It could be with a Steadicam.

You even said that.

- Let me ask you how you'd
feel about this, and be honest.

What if we shot the whole
picture in black and white?

- Why?

- Because New York City
is a black-and-white town.

It reeks of black and white.

- Forget it.

- Arty, it's arty.

- Does anybody have an aspirin?

Do you have an aspirin?

- Here, try one of these.

My herbalist gave them to me.

- I can do this picture.

I know, I got a feel for it.

I see it all, maybe with
like a Cole Porter score?

- All right, well,
let us discuss it.

We're talking to a
couple of other directors

and, um, we'll let you know.

- Maybe Irving
Berlin or something.

You bridge the--

- Well, I think we'd
have to discuss it.

- You know, if there ever was

a Val Waxman property,
boy, this is it, right?

- We'll keep in touch.

- Does anyone have a Xanax?

- Zantac.

I've got an ulcer too.

- Not Zantac, Xanax.

It's a completely
different problem.

- Can I talk to you?

- Listen, Val.

Oh, sorry.

It was great seeing you again.

It was.

- You've got an herbalist?

- Oh, yes, a genius.

In Beverly Hills he's a genius.

If he was in New York, he'd
be considered low-normal.

You know, we use a completely
different rating system here.

- When we were kids,

there were like ten foreign
films a week in this city.

Italian, French--

- Oh, Italian films.

I love them.

- Val Waxman.

Any messages?

You're sure?

Okay.

- Did you see my cat?

Isn't that neat?

- Sorry about that.

Uh, no.

Nothing.

- Anything?

- We were just talking
about Alfred Hitchcock.

- Mm-hmm.

- Truffaut said Notorious
was his best film.

- I agree, I agree,
a masterpiece.

- What are you talking about?

You hate, he hates that movie.

The ending makes you crazy.

- Yes, because
it's a masterpiece.

Every time I watch that movie,

when Cary Grant is
carrying Ingrid Bergman

down the staircase,

I always think that the Germans
are going to catch them.

- I do too.

- No matter how
many times I see it,

I think the Germans
are gonna get them.

- Hitchcock was an artist,
but he was commercial.

- Yeah, that's right.

- You say that like
it's a good thing.

- You have to be both.

I mean, he knew what
he was doing, you know?

In order to make movies,

you have to think about
the audience, you have to,

otherwise, you're just
making movies for yourself,

like artistic masturbation.

- That's right, that's right.

You're a narcissist.

- I'm a classic narcissist then.

Have I told you my views
on masturbation ever?

- No.

- For me, the nicest
thing about masturbation

is afterward, the cuddling time.

They're laughing,
I'm not joking.

- Want a wienie?

- You got it.

You're directing The
City That Never Sleeps.

I just got the call.

- I can't believe it.

I, I can't speak.

- I got you half a million,

plus a tenth of a point
after quadruple break-even.

Listen, uh, they're going
back to L.A. tonight.

You think you could meet Ellie
for a drink for ten minutes?

- Why?

- Why?

Because you owe her
some thanks, that's why.

She went out on a limb for you.

I think she wants to make sure
you're both on the same page.

Think about Hal Yeager.

He's quick to hire,
quick to fire.

You need Ellie to
run interference.

- All right, all right.

I'll meet her at the
Bemelmans Bar at nine o'clock.

I can spare ten minutes.

I can't tell ya,
my head's swimming.

A tenth of a point after
quadruple break-even.

You are really a shark, Al.

- Congratulations.

- Thank you.

Can I get a Beck's, please?

- Since we're working together,

I thought we should sit down
and talk for a few minutes.

- That's fine with me.

- I mean, as you know,

Hal was a little
skeptical at first

but in the end, you know,

he's a businessman
and very professional.

- Let me set your mind at ease.

You don't have to
worry about everything.

Things are gonna
go very smoothly.

This is, this is a big shot
for me and I realize that,

you know, many people
think that I'm,

that I can be difficult.

But you know I can
be very professional

and obviously, Hal
Yeager's very professional,

and you're
professional, clearly.

So, you know, as long
as business is business,

there should be no,

I cannot understand how

you could leave me for
that cheesy windbag.

It's mind-numbing to me.

I just don't understand that.

- Val.

- And you carry on with him
behind my back for two months.

- It was not two months.

- Yes, yes, it was.

Don't tell me it
wasn't two month.

You were carrying
on behind my back,

not even behind my
back, but under my nose.

That's twice a day.

Both places.

- Okay, you're exaggerating.

- I'm not exaggerating.

You were always on
the phone with him.

You were exchanging glances.

I noticed it.

Then suddenly, you
were exchanging fluids.

I can't believe that I
didn't really see it.

- You were too self-absorbed.

You were too intent on becoming

the great American film artist.

- Don't tell me that.

Everything was fine with you

until I started to
lose my audience.

Then suddenly you
dump me and move out

to Beverly Hills with
the swimming pool.

You hated California.

We both hated it.

You hated traveling every
place by car all the time

and I hated traveling
by mud slide.

- Well, what did
you want me to do?

Our marriage wasn't
going anyplace.

- Where did you want it to go?

Where do marriages go?

After awhile they all lay there.

That's the thing
about marriages.

- Look--

- You know, that's ridiculous.

- No, it was in trouble
for a long time.

You see, you don't see
what you don't want to see.

How was it in trouble?

- We didn't, we
didn't communicate.

- We had sex.

- Yes, we had sex,
but we never talked.

- Sex is better than talk.

Ask anybody in this bar.

- You can't--

- Talk is what you suffer
through so you can get to sex.

- You isolate everything.

You can't just
compartmentalize like that.

A good marriage consists of
many parts well-integrated.

- Yes, and is one of
those parts adultery?

- Never.

- Absolutely, at
the Plaza Hotel.

For God sakes, I got the bill.

You had the escargot
that afternoon.

I can't, it's so disgusting.

Sex and snails with that
roast beef from Beverly Hills.

- You were so busy playing
the American artist.

That's what you
were doing, playing.

You felt it was important to be

uncompromising
and temperamental,

and difficult, God, difficult!

To starve and to suffer.

I tell you, you had all the
symptoms, but not the disease.

- You used to think I was
creative and original.

- And I still do,
as a filmmaker.

It's when you became creative

as a hypochondriac, that was it.

- Hey, all those
attacks were for real.

- Oh, yeah?

- Yes.

- The Black Plague, Val?

An allergy to oxygen?

Elm blight?

Only trees get Elm
blight, Elm trees.

- Can I sum it up?

You cheated on me, you
lied, you dumped me.

Business.

We're here to discuss business.

- That's right.

- Can we discuss it?

- I wanna keep this absolutely
on a professional level.

- Absolutely.

I think that we should rework
the script a little bit

because I think it doesn't
have to be middle-aged people.

We could make the
character of Kelly Swain,

you know, maybe coming
out of college instead.

- That's true.

You mean out of law school?

- Out of law school, yeah.

I think they'd like
that at Galaxie.

That way we could cast
somebody like Terry Tyler.

- Great.

- Or maybe find, there's a lot
of talented kids out there.

You are such a shallow jerk!

I can't get my mind around it.

That you would
leave me for a guy

who is the opposite
of everything I am.

You know, with his
ski lodge in Aspen

and his collection
of vintage cars.

If I drove around
in a 1939 Mercedes,

people would think
I was Himmler.

- Hal's very smart, and
he's a brilliant deal maker.

- Yes, I know.

He's been audited by the best.

- He has made some
pretty financially

successful American films.

- That should tell you all
you need to know about him.

He's the white line down
the middle of the road.

- You had your little
flirtations too.

There was that,
that Italian model.

- No.

You were the only one
that I was serious with.

My God.

Until you suddenly
became non communicative,

non responsive
and you dumped me.

The movie is going to be a
fun movie to do, I think.

Um, and I have a lot of ideas

that I think we should discuss.

- Good, absolutely.

I just wanted to assure you

that once the studio
agreed to you,

you'll have their
full support and.

- Well, thank you very much.

I want a, I think I want
a foreign cameraman.

- That's no problem.

- Because they get a
texture into the work

that you would never get
with an American cameraman.

They have a certain mobility.

I remember coming home and
I picked up the extension

and there you are
on the other end

of the extension with this guy.

I'm calling and I hear
my wife in a lovey-dovey

with her lover, saying
she misses her lover.

- He wasn't my lover yet.

- Bull, he was your lover.

What are you telling me?

And I recognize the voice.

It's Hal Yeager from
Galaxie Pictures.

And I'm thinking to myself,

why is my wife talking like
that to Hal Yeager for?

They're making me
a surprise party.

I thought they were making
me a surprise party.

- Were they?

- No, she was having an
affair with Hal Yeager.

Follow the story.

Jesus, I can't believe this--

- I'm getting out of here.

- Wait a minute,
where are you going?

We're discussing a movie.

- No, I'm sorry.

I just--

What about--

- I'll be back and
forth from L.A.

and I won't bother you

and I'll see to it that nobody
gets in your way creatively.

What about Denise
Daniels as the blackmailer?

- Possibly, if you like.

- I think she would be great.

You know what I mean?

Or Sarah Bedloe.

She would be very interesting.

She, I pick up the
phone and she's talking,

I'm going to order a
corn beef sandwich,

she's talking to her
lover on the phone.

- Look, I'll be back
from L.A. in two weeks--

- This is gonna
be a fun picture.

- Production will be great,
we're all very excited.

- I'm looking forward to it.

About Hal Yeager, the word
on him is cross-dresser.

Check it out for me.

I pick the phone up and she--

- Hal, we're off to a
really good start here.

Tell me about it, honey.

- Val wants to use
a foreign cameraman,

which I think we
should give him.

He's got a real visual concept

of where he wants to
go with this thing.

Now he's chosen Kow Chan,
a Chinese cameraman,

done some really stunning
work, mostly with the Red Army.

- He says he doesn't
like his hotel.

He much prefer the Sherry.

- Hal, listen.

Val wants to go with Elio
Sebastian as art director.

Val says that Elio really
knows the streets of New York.

- Every location in the script

is out there
waiting to be found.

- This is great, it
saves us a fortune.

- With the exception of two,
Times Square and Harlem.

I have to build Times
Square and Harlem.

- We can't build Times
Square and Harlem.

With all due respect, Sebastian.

- He wants to build the
Empire State Building?

No.

- Just the first 20 stories.

- Absolutely not.

No, sweetheart.

It's not gonna happen, okay?

Just tell him no.

It's not gonna happen.

- All right, I'll handle it.

- Good, great.

Hey, listen, I miss you.

How's the weather back there?

- It's been great, you know?

It's been really New York-moody.

Very gray and cloudy.

- That's the way it is.

- Today's the first day of
sun we've had in awhile.

- Well, listen, here
it's been fabulous.

Sunny and clear every day.

Oh, listen, I gotta run.

I'm having another
skin cancer removed.

- This is perfect.

This view is absolutely perfect.

- No, no.

I hate it.

You know what, we're just
gonna have to build it.

Build Central Park?

- Yeah, you know, I take
back what I said before about

mixing real locations and sets.

- I don't wanna be a
money watchdog here,

but if you did build everything,

I say this metaphorically,

it'd have to be done over my
dead body, metaphorically.

- All right, if not the whole
park, then just the reservoir.

- Build the reservoir?

- Uh-huh.
You know what?

You get a studio,
put a tank in it

and you fill it with
a couple thousand

gallons of water, It'll work.

And then, wait, trees
behind it, you know?

New York as a symphony in green.

- Green I hate.

I never use green.

- No, no green.

- You know what?

Tell Mother Nature, okay?

Trees are green.

- We can play it for the winter.

You can use snow.

- I buy that.

A white background to
set off the two leads,

and marvelous '40s red.

- What, what?

What is he saying?

What?

- He says no white, no white.

He cannot shoot
white background.

- Sebastian, what have
you gotten me into here?

- All I'm saying is that I think

you're being precipitous
in firing him.

Look, I never
wanted this guy.

Not from day one.

- Hal.

- I beg your entire pardon.

May I just offer for
your consideration,

a single concept,
and I say this--

- Val, you don't
have to stand up,

you don't have to
lean into the speaker.

Look, he's out.

I want this guy out before

this picture becomes
a cost nightmare.

- Look, Hal, I think that maybe
if we had a talk with him.

I said from the
start to use Harold Pappas.

- Pappas is a hack.

Pappas is safe, but
he's uninspired.

I can't work with him.

Then you
should bow out now.

- I said I can't work with him,

I didn't say I
wouldn't with him.

val, I don't mean
to get hot under the collar,

but Pappas has how
many nominations

compared to this
Greenwich Village lunatic?

- They probably spent
more money getting

those nominations than he'll
spend building a reservoir.

What, I didn't get that.

- That's nothing, nothing, Hal.

I gave in on the
Chinese cameraman okay.

I've kept away
from your picture.

I'm just saying I'd feel
more secure with Pappas.

- A word to the wise.

- Is there anything
about the part of Benny

that you want to tell
me before I read it?

- Only that he's a Broadway
sharpie, he's a gambler.

- Like Sky Masterson?

- Perfect, exactly.

- Now, forgive me,

it might seem obvious,
but he's a Runyonesque,

bookmaker-type, uh, is tough,

but softhearted with his
wife who he's nuts about?

- That's it on the nose.

That would be perfect.

- Okay.

Go.

- Jerry, some guys were over
the house looking for you.

Seems you owe some money.

- I hope you didn't tell
them anything, Helen.

I could find myself
in deep trouble.

Deep, deep trouble.

- Thank you.

- Hi.

I'll wait for you.

If they give you 30
years, I'll be waiting.

If they give you 50
years, I'll be waiting.

If you get two consecutive
life sentences,

I'll be waiting.

- I thought that last girl
was kind of interesting.

Did you?

- Really?

- I thought she read it
better than the others.

- I know, but Claire's
supposed to be classy.

Didn't you think she was a
little on the cheap side?

- Cheap?

- To be perfectly honest, I
thought she radiated stupidity.

- Stupidity?

- I mean, her reading
was competent enough,

but, my God, it's like her
persona, it's trashy and dumb.

- Well, you know, I think
I'd like to use her.

She was interesting.

- You're the director.

- It's not that
big a part, Ellie.

- But it's a featured role.

Claire's supposed to be a
socialite, for God sakes.

This girl, Lori Fox, she's
like a step above trailer park.

- Well, I would hardly
call her trailer park.

- I said a step above.

- Well, I'd like to use her.

I thought she was
perfect for the role.

- Fine.

I mean, it's your decision.

I'm just throwing
out ideas here.

You can take 'em or leave 'em.

- Two for Yeager, please.

- They're clearing
your table, Mr. Yeager.

- Thank you.

- I am so glad that you
could come in, I really am.

- I was here on business and
I wanted an excuse to see you.

I didn't want you to
think I was crowding you.

- I know you, you know.

You're checking up on me.

Everything's going really fine.

It is.

- And val?

- Val's Val.

He seems reasonably flexible.

Most of his ideas
are really good.

- I hope so.

- You'll see.

- Right this way.

- Thank you.

- Thanks.

- There are no personal feelings
that make it seem awkward?

- No, no.

I think he's accepted
things and moved on.

- Good, good, oh by the
way, Andrea Ford's going

to be covering the making
of the film for Esquire.

- Oh, no kidding.

- Yeah.

- Hey, Val.

We were just talking about you.

Hey, Val.

Ellie was telling me how
well things are going.

How are you?

Good to see you.

Everything all right?

- What are you doing here?

- What do you mean,
what am I doing here?

- No, what are you doing
here at this moment?

- We used to eat here.

- Hal came in on a
plane a few hours ago.

- That's the best way to fly.

What are you doing in this
restaurant at this moment?

- What do you mean?

We're coming in to get a
bite, are you all right?

You're awfully
fidgety or something.

- No, no, no, no.

- What are you doing?

Are you okay?

- Yes, no, I'm fine.

I was just thinking you should

go to your table because
it's crowded here.

- I'm ready to go.

- Look, it's the woman that
was at the audition today.

Miss, hello miss.

- That's very funny.

Aren't you going
to introduce me?

- It's Lori Fox, isn't it?

Yes, of course.

- I think it was.

- Yes.

Val is such a riot.

Stop kidding around.

I just, I really wanted
to put your mind at ease

that just because I'm the
director's significant other,

I can still act.

- Hi.

- Hal?

- Hey, Mort, how are you?

I thought you were in Aspen.

- I wish.

- You know Ellie, my fiancée?

- Hi, how are you?

- Hi, I'm Lori Fox.

- Fiancée?

- Nice to meet you.

- Congratulations,
when's the date?

- New Year's Eve.

- My goodness, how romantic.

That's wonderful.

- Congratulations
on your new film.

- You know Val Waxman.

- Of course.

Sure.

- Fiancée?

- We sued him for failure
to complete a picture.

- Oh great, that
makes me feel secure.

- I'll see you tomorrow, Val.

- Hurry!

I'll miss my flight.

- This is not a good
time for you to go away.

You know I'm very vulnerable.

- If I'm gonna be in this
movie, I have to get into shape.

This spa is the only way I'll
ever have the discipline.

- But you're not overweight.

- Oh, my God!

I'm a horse.

I have to appear in lingerie.

- What if we need you?

It's a ten-week
shooting schedule.

My scene doesn't come
until the very end.

- What if I need you?

I'm going through a bad time.

- You'll be fine.

You'll be fine,
you're a big boy.

- Oh, geez.

You know, I'm afraid
to sleep alone.

I keep thinking people
are breaking in.

I lay awake all night

thinking of death and the
blackness and the abyss.

- Oh, oh, don't forget
to water my cactus.

- Call me every day.

- I can't, they don't have
any phones at Dolby Ranch.

They want to discourage
secret eating schemes.

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, my gosh.

Okay, I gotta go.

Gotta go!

And we want to
see the earrings, profile.

Other profile, please.

And cut.

Thank you.

- Is it true your cameraman
speaks only Chinese?

- Yes, Mandarin.

It's so hard to find a good
Cantonese cameraman these days.

Neighborhoods just
don't have them anymore.

- Oh yeah.

Hal Yeager's known
to be very hands-on,

very hot-tempered,
quick to replace people.

- Does that bother you?

- No, because the deal is

they're going to leave me
alone during the shooting.

I have complete freedom.

- How about working so
closely with your ex-wife?

- Well, it's not so close.

She'll just be up and back.

It's not going to be that close.

- Well, there must
be some bitterness.

Especially now that she's
going to marry Hal Yeager,

the man she left you
for who's now your boss?

- Who are you?

- Oh, I'm Andrea Ford.

I'm going to be doing the story

on the making of the
movie for Esquire.

- Oh, really, are you?

- Yeah, yeah.

Didn't they tell you?

I'm going to be
observing the whole time.

- 'Cause I don't
usually like, you know,

when journalists
hang around the set

and observe when I work.

- Take that up with
the press department.

But don't worry, 1
won't get in your way.

I promise, I am a huge fan.

- Yes?

- Oh, huge.

I have loved all of your movies.

- Oh, well, you know.

And you'll be hanging
around doing a story here?

- Yes, because, in
fact, I've always

thought of you as a unique
American artist really.

- Well, I'm sure you
won't be in the way here.

You know, there's plenty
of room and you can have--

- Val, hey, gosh, I'm so sorry.

Can I steal him for a minute?

- I really was about to--

- Some things we
have to go over.

I'll get him right back to you.

I'm so sorry, in one minute.

I'm so sorry, you
need to be careful.

She is a killer.

- She's a killer?

- I didn't think
it was a good idea

having her around all the time.

But then the press
department told Hal

that they could get the
cover of Esquire and so--

- How is she a killer?

She loves me.

- Well, that's fine.

I mean, if she
likes you, you know.

Otherwise, she can be biting.

- Really?

- I hear she's all
sugar and sweetness,

and gets into your good
graces and then wham!

She kept telling
Sean Madigan how she

loved all of his films
and she was a big fan.

How he was a great, I don't
know, unique American artist.

- Really?

- And then in the profile,
she disemboweled him.

- You know, if you happen

to fall for that
kind of flattery--

I can handle it, though.

- Please, you couldn't
handle Shirley Temple.

- Give me a break, will ya?

You know, I can't figure it out.

It's okay to have an
affair with Hal Yeager,

but you know,
everyone is entitled

to have one psychotic
episode in their lives,

but to marry the guy is--

- Honestly, I wouldn't
talk if I were you.

- What does that mean?

- I don't know.

How long have you been living
with that wind-up doll I met?

- You know I don't
like to sleep alone.

For God's sakes, I'm
not going to marry her.

And that wind-up doll
happens to have a Ph.D.

- In what?

History of gym?

- Hey, look.

Will you give me a break
with the cutting remarks?

I got a picture to do Tuesday.

I'm thinking about my work.

- All right.

I want you to get some
rest this weekend, okay?

And don't lie around
the whole time worrying

about everything
that could go wrong.

- Don't worry.

I'm not going to lie around.

I've got my hand on
the wheel, honey.

This picture's in the bank.

- Amanda, honey, who is it?

- I don't know.

Uncle Al, it's for you.

- Please, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

- A man or woman?

Hello?

- Al, you gotta get
over here right away.

- Why, what's wrong?

I'm at my sister's for a Seder.

- Al, you gotta get over here.

This is a matter
of life and death.

It's open, come in!

- What is it?

What's going on?

What am I doing here?

- Al, I'm going to try
to explain this to you.

I came home, and 1
started to make notes

on the script, you know,

because we shoot Tuesday
and I wanted, you know,

then I started to get nervous.

So, I sat down on the sofa,

and I was doing my
deep-breathing exercises,

just to stay calm, you know?

And it was working, and I
started to relax and dose off

Then I slept for a while.

Then I woke up, Al and
I can't see anything.

- What?

- I'm blind.

I'm blind, Al.

What?

- I'm blind, I'm
blind, I can't see.

- What do you mean,
you can't see?

- What do I mean what do I mean?

Those guys in the street

with the dark glasses
and accordions?

- What are you talking about?

Are you trying?

- Al, you can't try and see.

You look around and you
see or you don't see.

I don't see.

- How can you be blind?

- How the hell do I
know how I can be blind?

I'm, Al, I'm scared.

What did you eat?

- What's the
difference what I ate?

You can't lose your vision
from a plate of tofu.

I never heard
of anything like this.

- Yes, I did.

Remember the actor Harvey Gates?

Yeah?

- He lost his vision suddenly.

From what?

- Grapefruit.

Grapefruit?

- Yes, he had a tumor the size
of a grapefruit on his brain.

And he went blind?

- Yes, he went blind and a
few months later he went dead

which is worse than blind
'cause your options decrease.

- Relax.

You don't have a brain tumor.

- Al, with all due respect

I have to hear
that from somebody

who went to a greater
medical school

than the William Morris agency.

- We'll get you to Dr. Mason.

You still use Mason, right?

- No, Mason dropped
dead on the treadmill.

I use Koch.

- You know, I use Koch too.

Did you bump into anything?

Did you fall?

Did you bump your
head or something?

- I didn't bump my head.

Nothing, Al, I
got a brain tumor.

That's the story here.

I, the end is in sight.

I see the wall.

I thought you
said you couldn't see.

- It's an expression.

I don't actually
mean I see a wall.

It's in my mind's eye.

- Listen, I remember that Ellie

and I took you to the hospital,

you insisted on taking
you to the hospital

because you were convinced you
had hoof-and-mouth disease.

- Oh, God, Ellie!

Look, if I die, Al,

tell Ellie I'm sorry I said
all those things to her.

I said terrible things to her.

I called her all kinds of names.

Probably because I never
stopped loving her.

You're not dying.

- Well, if I don't die, tell her

she's a tramp and
she's living with a guy

the best you could say

about him is sometimes
he returns phone calls.

Oh, Dr. Koch.

It's Al Hack here.

I'm sorry to call you
at home on holiday,

but I'm sitting here
with Val Waxman--

- Okay, you can sit back now.

- So, what is the story?

- Well, your optic
nerve is normal.

Your eye exam is normal.

I don't see anything.

- Wonderful.

- You don't see anything?

I don't see anything either.

That's the problem.

- Any tumor large
enough to impact

on his vision so
dramatically would show up.

I only wish I was in as
good health as he is.

- This is a textbook scenario.

Physically, you're 100 percent.

But just like someone who
has an hysterical paralysis

a patient who's fine
but he can't walk,

or a patient who loses
his or her voice,

from witnessing a horrible
shock or any extreme,

stress-related trauma,

being a film director,
your inner-conflicts

have chosen to
express themselves

in this very telling fashion.

You're psychosomatically blind.

- How can I get rid of it?

- By treatment.

By understanding the
roots of your conflict.

There's every chance that
this blindness will go away.

- How quickly?

- Well, real growth
is always very slow.

- There goes my comeback.

- You cannot breathe a
word of this to anybody.

- I gotta tell 'em, Al.

You know, I just
dread telling Ellie.

- Are you nuts?

They'll fire you.

- Fire me?

I obviously can't
direct the picture.

- What are you talking about?
How can you blow this shot?

- What are you talking
about, I'm blind.

- Nobody knows.

- What the hell does that mean?
What are you suggesting?

- If you pull out
of this project now

because psychological stress

has caused you to lose your
sight, you'll never work again.

They'll burn your union card.

Maybe they
could postpone it.

- Oh, yeah, because
you're blind?

Val, direct this picture
and bring in a hit

or I leave you with two
words, homeless man.

I can't
direct, how can I--

- I'm telling you how.

You're going to muddle

your way through until
your sight returns.

- Al, I can't direct a picture.

I'm blind.

- Have you seen some of
the pictures out there?

- The first five minutes
they'll catch me.

- Maybe they will,
maybe they won't.

If they do, you're no worse
off than if you confess,

because you're finished
in the business anyway.

- You gotta be joking.

I'll take one step on the
set, I'll break my neck.

- No, no, no.

I'll come with you.

- They won't let you.

The actors get nervous
when agents hang around.

It's against Galaxie policy.

- Listen.

Once you get on the set,

you get relaxed, you
won't even need me.

- There's no way to do this.

I would have to take
somebody into my confidence.

- Absolutely not.

No, never, not a hint.

This can't get out.

You will direct a hit picture.

Sometimes God works
in strange ways.

- Like Job.

Notes on Making of
The City That Never Sleeps.

First morning
atmosphere is upbeat.

Lots of eager anticipation.

People moving lights.

Actors and actresses all
ready in costume and makeup.

Val Waxman is not the
first one on the set.

Actually, a few minutes late.

- This is never going to work.

- It's working perfect,
just stand straight.

- Am I going to
bump into anything?

- No, no, no.
I'll I guide you.

You don't trust me,
you have to trust me.

- I gotta look funny.

- You look perfect, I'm
telling you, you look perfect.

Look at this, how
wonderful, nice.

- Good morning.

Would you like anything?

Any coffee?

- Coffee.

Want some coffee?

- Coffee.

Yeah.

No, no, no, no thank you.

- Okay.

Well, the actors are here

if you're ready to
block the scene.

- Block the scene?

- Yes.

- Listen, Val.

Are you okay with the
changes in the set?

- Oh, the set.

It's beautiful, it's beautiful.
It's great.

- How do you feel about
the background color?

You satisfied?

- It's blue and, you
know, brown and yellow,

but is it a little dark?

- Beg your pardon, who are you?

- I'm Al Hack, I'm his agent.

- Al, can I speak
to you a second?

- Yeah, uh, I'll be right back.

Don't worry, I'll be right back.

IN - Al?
es, yes, yes?

- Not that you're
not welcome here.

You know I love you.

- Yes, yes.

- But, you know,
this is a closed set.

- Oh, well, you see,
he really needs me.

He likes me to be with him.

- I know, but a man
of your stature,

an agent, you know,
it intimidates people.

You look so good.

Have you had any work done?

- Just over here.

- A little?

'Cause I, who did you go to?

Not that I need it, but
I'm thinking about it.

- Fred, Fred.

He's new.

- Oh, he's incredible.

You got the best clients.

Can you get me a price?

- I think that we may be
like a little bit too light.

Would you prefer that I take

the whole thing
one shade darker?

- Eh, well, that's
a possibility.

What do you think,
what would you do?

- Well, I really don't know.

It's possible I could make

the whole thing
match the upholstery.

That's another option.

- That's brilliant.

That's what I would do.

I would match the upholstery.

- Excuse me.

Chief, what alarm clock
would you like to go with?

- That one.

- Which one?

- That one, that one.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry?

- Yes.

- Which?

- Yes that one,
that one, yes, yes.

- You like the wind
up or the electric?

- The wind up, wind up.

I like the wind-up.

- Val?

Val, excuse me, will you
excuse me, gentlemen.

Can I see you just for a second?

Don't worry.

Excuse me, excuse me.

- Al, this is not working.

- Yes, don't worry.

Don't worry, it's
going to work fine.

But you're right.

It is a closed set,
and I have to leave.

- You--

- Listen to me, listen to me.

Just go to Plan B.

- What is Plan B?

We don't have a Plan B.

- We gotta find somebody who
you trust who will help you.

Someone you can rely on.

- You mean, tell
someone the truth?

- Yes, yes, somebody
you can rely on.

We'll get somebody who's
around you all the time.

Who doesn't look odd, you know?

Maybe the A.D?

What about the script girl?

- Can't do that.

They'll get in trouble.

If they get caught they'll never
work in the business again.

I have a responsibility, Al,
to Ellie and even to Hal.

- You have a
responsibility to yourself.

- You have agent's ethics.

I can't go by you.

- Don't hit me with
oxymoron's at this time.

We're in a crisis!

Wait a minute.

What about the Chinese kid?

- The translator?

- Yes, the translator,
the translator.

He's a business
student at NYU, right?

He doesn't care if he's
in the movie business.

If he gets caught,
it's no big penalty.

- Well, he is always around me.

- Yes he is.

- It's a natural.

- Yes, see?

Val, I've
got the actors.

We are ready for you.

- Don't worry, don't worry.

I'll get you to the set.

Take it easy, just take it easy,

I'll take you. I'll take you.

It's all right,
it's gonna be fine.

- If I'm acting so crazy,

everyone will notice
that I'm acting crazy.

- Listen, you got a
reputation for being crazy.

This is the perfect time for
it to work in your favor.

Watch out, one step,
one step, one step.

Very good.

Hey, can I have Mr.
Waxman's chair here?

- Chair?

- The director needs
his chair, where is it?

Thank you very much.

Here, come sit.

Look, your lucky chair.

- Oh wonderful.

Sit, sit, sit, be relaxed.

Very good.

Good luck.

- I can't work with
outside people watching me.

- Nobody's gonna be watching.

- Incidentally, you like
this one or this one?

- I like that one.

- This one?

- 'Cause this one's more like

what they'd really use, but
this one's more theatrical.

- Well, you know, you can
use this one if you'd like.

But I prefer that one.

- Which one?

- This one, that one.

- The first or the second?

- I'd like to make my
entrance from the stairs.

- Hold it.

What, who ordered, who ordered?

What's happening?

- How do you want
me to kiss her?

What's happening here?

- Which way did you
want me to kiss her?

- What?

You know, on the mouth.

- What about my mouth?

- No, kiss her on the mouth.

- He hasn't seen
here for six years.

We originally
discussed some kind

of passionate way
of grabbing her.

- Oh, well, use both lips.

- Oh, excuse me.

Could I talk to you
just for a second?

- Me?

- Yeah, just for a minute.

- Uh, they need me.

- Well, actually, the director.

The director asked
me to talk to you.

- Mr. Waxman?

- Yes, it's a chance to
make some extra salary.

Now, you seem to be a very
responsible young man.

Are you?

- You should move left.

- You got me doing two
things at once here.

I can't work if I don't
know what you want me to do.

- You should cross left.

- Wait, me?

You mean my left?

If I cross my left, I'm
going to bump right into him.

- You don't have to bump me.

- I'm probably going
to knock him over.

- Where is the translator?

Excuse me, he's
supposed to be on set.

- Sir, I have a very
important message for you.

- Important message for me?

- Um, I'm here to help you.

I know about your secret.

- Don't!

- Cut!

Very good, that was terrific.

Was it very good,
was it very good?

- Well, I don't see the
dramatic impact of it.

But it did seem a
little improvement

from the random chaos
you were encouraging.

- Oh, oh, thank you,
thank you.

You didn't like the
random chaos, huh?

Let's, can we go again?

Just for safety, one more?

- Okay, sir, we're approaching
a hallway right now.

So we're gonna walk slowly.

There's nobody here.

Practically nobody.

- Okay.

- Be careful.

- I'm trying to be casual,
but it's extremely difficult.

- Oh, I know that--

- Sorry, boss, you all right?

- Yes, no, I'm fine, I'm fine.

It was my fault completely.

I forgive you.

- Sir, he's gone.

He's not there anymore.

You're talking to air.

- Why didn't you warn me?

- I thought you saw him.

This is very weird for me.

- You thought I saw him?

How am I--

- A few summers ago I
did aid a deaf uncle.

- You're going too fast.

- Okay, slowly, slowly.

It's very weird.

I was helping out a deaf
uncle a few summers ago.

- Yes.

- But we didn't have
to hide it like this.

- Oh, Jesus, this is great.

- Val, you wanna go with this
one tomorrow or the big one?

- Uh, well--

- Wow, these are
beautiful pocket watches.

- Thanks.

- I would go with the big one.

- Val, um, how'd you
feel the first day went?

- The first day was, you
know, like the first day.

It was like a shakedown where
you weed out the malcontents.

- Oh, good.

I'd love to speak to
you for a few minutes

if you're not too busy and all.

- Well, sir, you said you wanted

me to show me that,
uh, piece of jade?

- Jade?

- No, you know what?

If you have work to do we'll
do this some other time.

- I do, yes, I do.

- Okay.

- Thank you.

Sorry, sir.

That's all I could think
of to extricate you.

You realize there's
no piece of jade.

- Yes, I get it, I get it.

There's no jade.

- Hey, everything okay?

- So far our conspiracy
has gone undetected.

- Perfect, perfect.

I'm taking you to
your shrink right now.

Listen, same drill
tomorrow, Chou.

- Don't worry.

I'll practice casual banter.

- Very good, good.

Nice to see you.

To observe
Val Waxman directing

one would think he has
no idea what he's doing.

I wonder if he is one
of those cinema geniuses

who thrive on
chaos, like Fellini.

He always seems distracted.

He never looks
anyone in the eye,

and must be juggling a million
things in his mind at once.

It's easy to see why
his reputation is

one of an eccentric.

I notice, too, as
the weeks go by

what a great interest he
has in the photography

as he is always conferring

with the cameraman
through his translator.

- How were they?

How were the dailies?

- You forget, sir.

I'm not a film student,
hence, a poor judge.

I study business, and
as an investment, sir,

I wouldn't invest--

- He says he cannot understand

what it is you're
trying to do, sir.

He thinks it's very odd.

- Well, how were
the performances?

I wouldn't know, sir.

But you could hear them, right?

Or is your hearing faculty
breaking down as well?

- My hearing is fine.

But are they making
too many faces or,

what about the scenes
where there's no dialogue?

How's the action?

- Well, I understand
the actions,

but that's because
I've read the script.

But, sir, I must confess,
be careful, the steps.

There is a strong
sense of incoherence.

- Incoherence?

That's great.

That's exactly what I'm
going for, is incoherence.

- Well, how were they?

- I'm happy, they were great.

- Which take was best
of the robbery scene?

- The last one.
- The first one.

- The first part of the last one

is better than the last
part of the first one

but the middle take's
probably the most overall.

- I smell magic here.

- How's it going?

- It seems to be
going all right?

He spends a lot
of time conferring

with his cameraman
through the translator,

and that takes time, but I
got my foot on the pedal.

Pedal to the metal.

- Well, put him on, will you?

- Oh, yeah, I'll find him.

- Hey, Carol.

Send some flowers to Haley
Joel Osment with a card.

You know, congratulations

on your Lifetime
Achievement Award.

- It's Ellie, she
wants to talk to you.

- Hello?

- Hi, I hear it's
going pretty well.

- Oh, yes, as far as I can see.

- Well, good, listen.

I'm gonna come in next week,

maybe take a look
at some dailies?

- No, I wouldn't do that.

- I've stayed away for the
first half of the film.

I sort of.

- Well look, nobody
sees my dailies

except myself and the cameraman.

That's our deal.

- Well, you used to always ask

my opinion on the
dailies, you know.

- Those days are over, honey.

That was when you were
a sharp New Yorker.

You know, anyone with an
herbalist doesn't my dailies.

As filming
reaches the halfway mark

rumor has it that Sharon
Bates, the leading lady,

has developed a
crush on Val Waxman.

He seems to resist personal
contact with anyone

but today she insisted he
visit her dressing room.

- Excuse me.

I'll see you later and
we'll discuss it, okay?

- Yes, don't go far.

Okay, I'll be right here.

- So, I understand that you

wanted to talk about
something with me.

- Can I be frank?

- Oh, yes, of course.

- I'm having a real
problem working with you.

- Problem working with me, why?

- Well, uh, I feel
something unspoken

has developed between us.

Something
developed between us?

Like what?

- Well, it might
be my imagination,

but the way you look at me,

it's like you're making
love to me with your eyes.

- My eyes?

- Look, I'm a very
direct person.

When I start having
feelings about someone,

I don't hold back.

- You know, I thought we were
gonna discuss the character.

I thought maybe you were having

trouble getting into
the role or something.

- Am I making you nervous?

- No, you know, I've had
a tough day out there.

A lot of tough decisions,

and so I'm, you know, a little
frazzled maybe, but I'm fine.

- Come here.

- Just, you know.

- Come here, why don't you
sit on the sofa with me?

- Just for a minute.

- The sofa?

- Yeah.

- Oh, oh, really?

The sofa, the sofa, yes, okay.

- The sofa.

I just, I really want
your full attention.

- The sofa's fine.

- Oh, I don't need
a throw pillow.

I'm comfortable.

- If I trust a
director to direct me,

I trust him to make love to me.

- Oh, well, just
let me say this.

I'm a big believer in that,
but not while I'm working

because I never like to
mix business with pleasure.

Because I'm, you know,
I'm a dedicated artist,

and like a Trappist monk,

I feel the best way
to do a good picture

is to abstain till
the shooting is over,

because, you know, it's my
adoration of the cinema.

Cinema is a jealous mistress,

and so I'm, I, you know, I'm,
that's just the way I am.

But we can table
our, we can wait

till after the shooting's over--

- What are you doing?

- Me?

Oh, oh, oh, when I feel
emotionally moved in some way,

some people smoke,
I fondle walls.

- I understand completely.

- It's just a crazy.

- I'm sorry, I didn't
mean to upset you.

- No, I'm not
upset, I understand.

This happens on the set.

- I just, if I act, if I act

with a fine director
like yourself,

there's nothing I wouldn't
do sexually for him.

- Oh, well, you should
take a full-page ad

in the D.G.A.
magazine stating that

because you'll never
stop working then.

Um, is it possible to
open the door for me?

All the heavy breathing
has steamed my glasses.

Am I close?

Yes, so we'll talk
again like this.

Thank you, Al?

Al?

This time is different.

What do you mean?

This time
it's my father.

- Johnny.

Your father!

You can't kill your father!

- They want him dead!

What am I supposed to do?

- But he's your father!

- I'm doing my job.

You get a hold of yourself.

He's got it coming
like anybody else.

- This is great, this is great.

That's exactly
where it should be.

- No, I think if you
put the camera there,

it's the wrong direction.

The audience will
think she's looking

at the wall, not her lover.

- I know screen geography.

Chan, am I right?

Is that where it should be?

- He never understands what

the hell you're
trying to do, sir.

- Uh, believe me, I know

but leave the
camera where it is.

He's a genius.

- Yes.

- His style, the way he shoots.

It's so unconventional.

- Really?

- Was he difficult to live with?

- Sometimes.

- As the second missus,

did you consider yourself
a young trophy wife?

- Andrea, I thought this
wasn't a gossip piece.

- Oh, no, I'm just
curious how you two met.

- At the Golden Globes.

- Oh.

- I was there with a date,

and I thought it was interesting

that when he won he
thanked his urologist.

- Next time, try and
warn me before I fall.

- I was trying to tell you,

but the journalist
was around and--

- Hey, gosh, are you okay?

That was something.

- It's nothing, just
a fractured skull.

- Listen, you wanna
go grab a bite?

- I can't, Al's meeting me.

I got a very important
business meeting.

- But I told you I wanted
you to set aside some time

so that we could discuss things.

- It's not easy for me.

I got a lot of meetings
and important things to do.

- How about a drink later then?

- I can't, maybe
after the shooting.

I don't know.

It's tough for me.

- Could you, I'm sorry.

Could I just get a
moment with him alone?

Thanks very much.

- Okay, you've been
avoiding me since I got in.

Why?

- How am I avoiding you?

I let you see the dailies.

You saw some of them, you
made no comment whatsoever.

- Well, you know, I
mean, I'm not a director.

I mean, I, um,
personally, I had some

difficulty making
sense out of 'em.

But I assume that once
they're all cut together,

you know what you want.

- They'll just be great.

They're, I like them.

- All right, so then
why are you avoiding me?

- I'm not avoiding
you, for God's sakes.

I, you know, I'm busy.

I got, you know, I
got a lot on my mind.

- Is it about the ring?

- The ring?

The ring?

- Yeah, I mean don't pretend
that you don't see it.

I know how you are on the
subject of Hal and me.

- No, no.

Hey, your ring is beautiful.

I love the shape of it

and I think it's probably
expensive, knowing Hal.

- I'm not wearing it.

- I know you're not wear, I
knew you weren't wearing it.

- You know, because
I thought it might

be what's accounting for
your strange behavior.

- My behavior's fine,
now if you don't stop.

Everybody's commenting
on my behavior.

Remember when we got married

and we didn't have
time to get a ring

and I had to go get that
thing in the novelty shop?

I got that ring that squirted
water as a practical joke.

- Well, little did I
know that our marriage

would turn out to be
God's practical joke.

- Well, you certainly
stayed in it long enough.

- Hey, inertia
accounts for two-thirds

of the marriages in America.

- Yeah, but the
other third is love.

- You know, I think
we should just stick

to talking about the filming

the last couple of weeks
and post-production.

- I got nothing to talk about.

I'm waiting for Al.

Al, this guy is always late.

He is invariably late.

- Lunch, lunch.

- He's here, Al's here.

- He's so funny, so tense.

- I kid him about being late.

- He's great, he's
great, I love him.

- What is his problem?

- He's firing me.

- He's firing you?

Why?

- He says he cannot
work with me anymore.

He wants to find somebody else.

- I don't understand.

What's the problem?

- He thinks that something

must be getting lost
in his translation

and that his work is
coming out irrationally.

- Well, tell him that
I love the dailies.

- But, sir, to be honest,
they're not very lucid.

- Just tell him what I
tell you to tell him.

- He wants me off the set.

Otherwise, he won't work.

- With all due respect to Mr.
Chan, we're on the clock here.

It costs the studio
approximately $150,000 a day.

Explain that to him, nicely.

- Wait.

I got a great idea.

Why don't we fire the cameraman
but keep the translator?

- Now, wait, wait,
hold on a second, Val.

Now, Ed's right, and
that's how it's gonna be.

- I can't fire the translator.

- Why not?

- Because I can't.

- Oh, Ching.

- It's Chou.

- Chou, Chou, listen.

Who are we gonna
get to replace you?

- You have no idea who
the new translator will be

or even how long
before they find one.

- On the way over, I
was thinking about,

what about the caterer?

- Oh, no.

He has no reason to be
on the set all the time.

And you said you wanted someone

who wouldn't be ruined in the
business when they're caught.

- If, if, I said if.

- There really is no one.

I was quite perfect
for the assignment.

- You know Ellie is
gonna be around here

till the end of the, and
she does suspect something.

Wait a minute.

I just need you for
a private minute.

Oh.

- Al, listen.

If this is about
being on the set,

you know, even if
Galaxie made an exception

both of these actors, they're
not gonna allow it, so.

- Come here.

Sit down, sit down.

- Why?

- Well, I need your help.

- Okay, all right.

What can I do for you?

- Well, you know this is the end

of the line for Val if he
doesn't have a hit here.

- He will.

He can do this material
with his eyes closed.

- Yeah.

Right.

But if for any reason
he strikes out here

you know, his last hopes
for a career, they're over.

- Listen, Al.

I wanna put your mind at ease.

- Yes.

- While I've seen the dailies

and they're not what I expected,
I'm sure he has a vision.

Don't worry about it.

- Ah.

Look, if a problem came up,

a little problem where he
needed a little support,

a little
behind-the-scenes support

just for the last several weeks

- Sure, yeah, okay.

I'm starting to get
that Val Waxman chill.

What's going on?

- Could I level with you?

- Yeah.

- No, I mean, I
mean, really level.

I mean, pull no punches.

- What is it, Al?

- Well, it's nothing
that can't be dealt with.

He's just, he's blind.

- You wanna be serious?

Because I gotta tell you,
we're already behind schedule.

This has been crazy.

The cameraman threw
his little fit

and I'm losing my sense of humor

because things are
going crazy now.

- He's blind.

He can't, he can't see at all.

But don't panic.

It's, it's not a tumor.

It's not a disease
of the optic nerve.

It's not permanent.

It's, it's, it's--

- What is it?

- It's a psychological disorder.

It's psychosomatic.

- Oh God

- Sometimes that happens.

People get paralyzed or they

can't speak because of a trauma.

- This is not happening,
this is not happening, Al.

- He is on the set
right now faking it

but he's gonna need someone

to help him get through
the rest of the picture.

- The rest of the picture?

- Yes, yes, yes.

- What are you talking, how
long has this been going on?

- Since day one.

You know the Chinese translator?

He's been the secret
agent up till now.

But now he's gone,

and we're gonna need
somebody that he can trust

who'll stay close to him
and won't look suspicious.

- Wait a second.

You're telling me that he
has directed everything

up to this point blind?

- Shh.

No one has any idea.

He didn't want his
career destroyed forever

by another disaster story
about his work problems.

No one knows and that's

because of the translator
and because of me.

- Okay.

And no one must find out.

I mean, I'm serious, Al, nobody.

Not anybody on the crew,

not the drivers, not the actors.

- No.

- Not anyone from
Galaxie Pictures.

- Yes, I knew you'd
understand this problem.

- Oh, God.

May the day June 19 rot
in hell for all eternity.

- Well, is that the
day you married Val?

No, it's
the day he was born.

- Don't get upset,
don't get upset, please.

- No wonder he's been avoiding
me and acting so strange.

- He didn't want
anybody to know.

- That self-destructive,
psychosomatically blind.

That hypochondriacal neurotic.

And I say that really
with all due respect.

- You campaigned for
him to get this job.

- No one must know.

- I understand that.

But what you have
to do is you have

to be his eyes for these
last couple of weeks.

- Mellowed, you've grown up,

no more impossible
neurotic symptoms.

You know what?

I should have had
my head examined.

- Ellie, I thought
I had a brain tumor.

For God's sakes, be sympathetic.

- You couldn't get a
tumor if you tried.

You're not mature enough.

- What do you want me to do?

If the picture fails,
I go down the drain.

- If Hal ever finds out--

- Hal won't find out,
we're in the homestretch.

- Well, what exactly
is making you go blind?

I mean, when is it gonna stop?

Did you talk to your analyst?

What about your analyst?

You know, what did
your analyst say, sit.

- He doesn't have a clue.

- No, down.

- He just doesn't know.

- Well, that's great.

That's just--

What are you gonna do?

Are you gonna edit it blind too?

Put in the music blind?

Go to the premiere blind?

At least you won't be
able to read the reviews.

- Ellie, what if it
doesn't leave me?

What if I stay blind?

- I don't know.

I'll be in California
at my swimming pool.

You'll probably have
to learn Braille,

get a dog, work the subway.

- Aren't you gonna
put me to bed?

- Put you to bed?

I can't do it by myself.

Al always puts me to bed.

- Oh, God.

Val, is this project
headed for disaster?

Relax, I can handle it.

For God's sakes,

Beethoven did his symphonies
while he was deaf.

- You comparing
yourself to Beethoven?

Hey, look, could we not
get in a musical discussion now?

- I just don't understand
how you could do this,

and not be thinking
about anybody else.

That's the thing, I mean
after all, this is my movie.

And everybody's giving
their life's blood.

- Oh, give me a break.

For God's sakes, everyone's
getting paid top dollar.

You're gonna marry
a billionaire.

I'm the only one that goes
into the toilet if things fail.

- It's funny, I just don't think

that Hal's gonna
see it that way.

- Hal's not gonna know
unless you tell him,

you know, during pillow
talk or something.

You guys probably
don't have pillow talk.

He probably has sex with you

while he's on the
cellular phone.

- Okay, you know what?

You're fine.

I'll see you tomorrow.

- Hey, Ellie, don't go.

Ellie, for God's sakes,
you gotta put me to bed.

You know, Al always tucks me in.

- Yeah, well, he's your agent.

There's no limit
to what they do.

- Ellie, come on.

You used to be very
maternal toward me.

- You were infantile,
you needed it.

- Except in bed.

Then you were a hot number.

- I was a small-town
girl and you were

on the cutting
edge of everything.

- So how did I go
from the cutting edge

to the buttering edge?

- How did I end up
in a mess like this?

- Hey, this is not the first
time we've been in trouble.

We've had some pretty
sticky situations.

- No, not like this.

- Yes, 'cause I can recall them.

We, there, you
know, it wasn't all,

we've had our, our
share of situations,

no question about it.

- You mean like losing
our car in a crap game?

- Absolutely, that
was a disaster.

I told you at the time,

never trust a male
with a fixed nose.

But you didn't listen.

You know, it was
humiliating for us.

- Do you remember
staying up all night

in Paris listening to jazz

and ending up in jail somehow?

- Hey, to this day I can't

figure out how you
got us into jail.

- How I?

- It was the only
time in my life.

- No, as I recall, it
was your shoplifting.

- 'Cause you had to have
chocolate croissants

and I'd left my wallet
back at the hotel.

You know, you were so
demanding all the time.

- No, it was your
command of the language.

Never use the familiar
with a policeman.

- It's funny 'cause my
unfulfilled life dream

is that you and I would
live in Paris together.

- You know, I was willing,

and you were the one who
always lost your nerve.

- It's funny, though.

It seems like so long ago now.

It's amazing how things
change, isn't it?

- Yep, they do.

And those days are over.

Look, I'll see you tomorrow.

Your agent will be
over in the morning

to take you to the bathroom.

The movie is
in its last two weeks.

Val Waxman's ex-wife,

who was very hands-off
when shooting began,

is now very much involved.

I notice that Val
relies a lot on her.

They are in constant conference.

They lunch together every day

and, I suppose,
discuss the work.

She is the only one besides

the cameraman and
the new translator

who Val allows to
see the dailies.

- How were they?

- Really great.

Really great.

- Great, great.

- No, everything's going fine.

The, uh, the dailies
are really great

and, uh, we seem to be pretty
much on schedule, you know?

- Well, I must say,
I had my doubts,

but you proved me wrong.

Maybe he is a new man.

- Great, really, right.

By the way, I'm coming
in for the last few days.

I've got some business.

I wanna make the wrap party,

and I have to be
honored at a dinner

and probably Val and I
should have a private talk

about post-production,
the editing,

and have our picture
taken together

to dispel all those rumors
that we couldn't get along.

Yeah, that's right.

Okay, all right.

Take care, can't
wait to see you.

- Quick union question, Hal.

Can a hyphenate marry a
below-the-line person?

- That's for legal.

- I gotta tell you my nightmare.

- I dreamt last night that
Hal found out everything,

that he somehow just
knew that I was blind

and that I had been
blind from the beginning

and that I was directing
the picture blind

with the translator's
help and with your help,

and I, and in the dream,
I spoke to my shrink

and I asked him how long

it would last, and
he said indefinitely.

And Hal got furious with me,

and furious with
you for helping me.

And I, you know, I was,
it was just terrible.

I was just screaming
and, you know,

God, it, I, you know.

I haven't really had
a good night's sleep

in I don't know how long.

The anxiety's terrible.

- All right.

- Thanks for getting me back.

Al should be here any minute.

- Are you sure
you're gonna be okay?

- I'm fine, we had some close
calls today, I will say.

- Listen, I have to tell you,

I am very worried
about Hal finding out.

- I told you my nightmare.

- No, you didn't.

- Yeah, I told you
before, remember?

- No, you didn't.

What did you dream?

- I told you, I went
into great detail.

- You didn't, you
didn't tell me a thing.

- Well, it smelled like you.

- It smelled like me?

What are you talking about?

- I told you my nightmare.

I told you, didn't I?

Did I?

- No, you didn't.

What, did you, no.

- I don't know, did I?

- No, you didn't tell me,
what are you talking about?

- Well, before when I was
saying my nightmare in detail.

- Oh, God, Val no!

- I said my nightmare.

- No, the journalist, Andrea
Ford, we wear the same perfume.

You didn't?

Oh, God.

- What are you
saying, I told her?

- Did you?

- Did I?

I don't know.

- God Val, I mean if
you told her, that's it.

We're so, that's it.

Oh, my God.

Lori.

- Ellie!

- Lori, look Val, it's Lori.

- Hi, Val.

- Lori?

- Yup.

- Yes, oh, I know it's Lori.

I, what are you, you're
home unexpectedly.

What, you're a week early.

- I got bored.

But I'm almost ready
to shoot my part.

I'm so excited.

- Yes, but this is just
so completely unexpected.

- I didn't call 'cause I
was so busy working out.

My God, how they drive you.

But look at me.

Don't I look great?

Look, look, it's really hard.

- Oh!

- You can hit it.

Val, will you help me
with my bags please?

- The bags?

- Yeah.

Doesn't it look good?

Yeah, that one.

- No, Val, come on.

You're not gonna let your
producer lug my bags for me.

- No, it's fine.

I forgot she existed.

My God.

- You can't stay here, Lori.

- What?

- No, you can't stay here

because Ellie and I have
gotten back together.

- What?
- What?

- Yes, we have.

We thought about it a little bit

and we felt that, uh,
we had made a mistake--

- Val--

- No, no, no, I can't
lie to her, Ellie.

You know, it's not fair.

She can't come
with the two of us.

Three's a crowd.

- I'm speechless.

- I'm sorry.

You know, the heart
is very unpredictable.

It's not like the liver
or the spleen or anything,

where you--

- Am I still in the movie?

- You are.

Definitely, definitely.

- Definitely, definitely.

For sure.

- Okay, okay, okay,
okay, it's okay.

I'm fine with the
personal rejection.

I'm really okay with it.

Thank God I kept
that other apartment.

- Well, I, try and understand.

- Oh, no, no, no.

It's fine, I do, I
totally understand.

I'm still in the movie, right?

- Yeah.

- You're in the movie.

Yes, you're in the movie,
you're in the movie.

- Okay, here, help me with this.

Take it.

- You're in the movie.

- Val, come on.

My incense burner's
in there, be careful.

- We were at my apartment

and we're in the
bedroom together,

and, you know, we
were reminiscing.

It was great, and I wanted
so much to kiss her,

but I can't see.

- What makes you think
you could have kissed her?

She's engaged.

- Look, I gotta
get this blindness,

I gotta get finished with it,

because, you know, this is
crazy, not just for my work,

but I wanna lead a normal life.

- Tell me about the movie.

- There's nothing to
tell about the movie.

It's a little remake
of a 1940s movie.

You know, about a father
and son who don't get along,

and the kid grows
up to be a gangster

and some people hire
him to kill his father.

You have
a son, don't you?

- Yeah, from a prior marriage.

- It's interesting.

It's very interesting how
you never bring him up.

- Well, we don't speak.

Why not?

- Because he's got,
you know, orange hair

with nose rings and nipple
rings and lip rings,

and, and, and, he, he, he,

you know, he plays drums loud.

Is that any reason?

- No, but he gave a concert

and he ate a live
rat at the concert.

Still.

- And he's got tattoos
all over his body.

Yes.

- And we once had a
discussion about music

and he threatened to push
me down a flight of stairs.

What happened?

- It worked, he pushed me
down a flight of stairs.

- And how were you
as a father to him?

- I was fine, I was
very nice to him.

I loved him, I took
him to sporting events

and to the ballet and opera.

I encouraged his friends and I,

you know, let him play
music and stood behind him.

And?

- And we had a
discussion one day

and he shoved me down
a flight of stairs.

Where's his mother?

- She's married to a
millionaire in Brazil.

Very nice lady.

- So when you live with the
plot of this movie every day

and it parallels the
situation with your son,

how does that make you feel?

- Well, you know, I feel angry,

because, uh, I'm angry.

You know.

I always thought that
when he got older

we would be very friendly

and he would have a family,
and I'd be part of it.

You must miss him.

- We never speak.

- Well, you've blinded
yourself to the situation.

- Hey, listen.

Can we not digress?

I'm here to discuss my
psychological loss of vision.

Meanwhile, Hal Yeager's
coming in a week

and I don't want
him to catch me.

- No, no, no.

He'll be staying at
this suite, as usual.

Now look, he's gonna have you up

for one of his man-to-man talks

which means that you'll
be alone with him

for about half an hour.

All right, straight ahead.

- What if it's more
than a half an hour?

- It never is.

His concentration's only good
for about, sorry, my bad,

his concentration's only
good for about half an hour.

He's a busy guy.

- I'm never gonna
get down the hallway.

- Don't worry about it, I'm
gonna meet you at the door.

Al will get you
to the front door,

and then I'll get you
through the front hall

down to here to the suite.

We should just, we should start.

Okay, you go straight ahead.

One, two, three, four.

That puts the first
chair just to your right.

Hal's there.

- I'm lost, where should I be?

- You can't be lost yet.

You just, hold on.

If Hal's there, you come
forward another two paces.

That'll be to the right
of the first chair.

No, the desk is to your left,

that's right, from the
first chair, four paces.

And then.

- Four paces to the
desk or the left--

- But I think you should
start from the first chair.

And the first chair is--

- I can't find the first chair.

No, wait.

- Where am I now?

That's the desk,
that's the desk, the desk.

- The desk?

So where should I be?

- Let's see, the desk
is one, two, three paces

to the left of the first chair.

Well, Hal will be
in the first chair.

So I think the second sofa
over here would be right.

So you continue on.

- Wait, wait, wait,
I'm getting confused.

Two paces left of
the first chair

of the right of the sofa
or the right of the desk?

- Right, is the desk, to the
left, right of the first chair.

- The left of the desk.

So I remember there's a
chair on this side, right?

- Yes, that'd be
the second chair.

- There's a chair over here.

One, two, three.

- Did I get it, did
I get the chair?

- If I'm standing
facing the first chair,

is it eight paces to the left

of the second sofa
or eight paces--

- No.

- It's two paces to the desk.

- If they give you 50
years, I'll be waiting.

If they give you two
consecutive life sentences,

I'll be waiting.

Cut.

- What did you think?

I knew you could do it.

I think you were great.

- Did you like what I
did with my cigarette?

- With your cigarette?

- That was something,
that was really something.

That's just me, but
I thought it was.

- Yeah, no, no.

I thought so too.

I thought the cigarette
was great too.

- Oh, good.

I rehearsed it all last night.

- Oh, it's great.

- It shows.

- Wow.

It's still so hard
for me to believe

that you two are
back together again.

- You know what?

We sort of like to
keep that quiet.

That's just our thing.

- Oh, don't be silly.

You know, let, we,
she's knows our secret.

What's with the.

Well, you know.

We let the world know.

We, you know, we
should do this again

because it's gonna
be a while before

I get a chance to--

- Gosh, it's like
two dogs in heat.

My God.

- We gotta go to that meeting.

- No, no, no, no.

- It's good, let's.

- I was just getting
started actually.

Where are you?

That was great.

- Thank you.

- Two paces past the
clock is the first sofa.

- Right.

- No, no, wait.

Two pace, three
paces is the first,

'cause the bureau
is past the clock.

Two paces past the
first clock is the--

- Here, here.

Wait, wait, wait.

- Oh, God.

- You're gonna do it.

Don't worry, four steps.

Courage, have courage.

- Okay, let's go.

I got him.

- I'll wait in the lobby.

- Hal.

- Hi.

- Ellie, would you excuse us?

I wanna have a little
chat with val, man-to-man.

- Okay, sure.

I'll go make a few phone calls.

I'll see you boys later.

- So, so Ellie says things
are going very smoothly.

I said I hear things
are going smoothly.

- Yes, I, two, three, four.

Are things
going smoothly?

- Yes, yes.

No, things are, things are fine.

- Good, good.

Sit down.

No, no, not there, over here.

Where?

- Here, on the sofa.

- On the, on the, the sofa?

The sofa is to the, to the.

- Jesus, are you okay?

- Yeah.

- My God, are you all right?

- I stumbled, I came up short.

- That's all right.

- Tell ya, it was a
rough day filming.

- Okay, listen.

I'll tell ya what, let me
just get you a drink, okay?

You'll be fine.

I got some terrific
Irish whiskey over here.

It was a gift.

- No, no, I don't want
anything to drink.

- No, no, listen,
I'll tell you what.

This is gonna help you to
relax after a rough day.

I insist.

- I'll be all right.

- Here you go.

- Jesus, you really
are overworked.

My goodness.

So, you're happy
with the dailies?

- Uh, happy.

You know, what can I say?

Everything I've seen
so far has been great.

- Great, great.

And you definitely don't
want me to see them?

- You know, I get so
embarrassed when--

- I just thought that maybe
you'd like an outside opinion.

Sometimes somebody
with a little distance

can be very, very
objective, you know.

- Ellie saw the dailies and
she, I think she liked them.

At least she said
she liked them.

- Yes, yes, I understand.

You know, I see a great
deal of rough cuts.

- We're not anywheres
near the rough cut stage.

I don't cut the
picture as I go along.

I'm not one of those directors.

- Val, val?

- When the picture's over,

then I cut the whole
thing together--

- Val.

- Yes?

- You seem distracted.

- Distracted, no.

- Yeah.

- Well, I mean, I did have
a difficult day today,

but it ended happily.

- Okay, all right.

No, no, you're right.

A deal's a deal.

You know, I promised
I wouldn't peek.

I know it makes you nervous,

and Ellie made it very clear
to me the way you like to work.

A lot of people think we studio
heads have no sensitivity

but I wanna assure you that
we wanna make a good picture

every bit as much as you do.

It's just that we
have to be concerned

with the realities
of the marketplace.

Would you stop moving
your head like that?

It's very distracting.

- Oh, no.

I'm sorry, I was just.

- Thank you.

- Just feeling a little,
you know, I'm okay.

- Okay, as long as
you're satisfied.

- I'm satisfied, I am,
and I know you will be.

- Good, good, hey listen.

I wanna show you what we
have in mind for the poster.

- The poster?

- Yeah, come here.

- Come here?

Me?

Yes, well, no, I'm coming.

The desk, the desk.

- Come here, come on, come on.

Listen, you are overworked.

I'm nervous.

- I'm impressed, you
have been working hard.

What are you doing?

Have you developed some
kind of nervous disorder?

- Yes, I have a little arthritis
that sometimes kicks in.

- Oh.

So, you like 'em?

- Like what?

- The posters.

- Yes, yes, they're great.

- Which one?

- They're all,
they're all great.

- My favorite, number two.

Oh, this is, it's just
great, it's a strong graphic.

- Yeah, I knew you'd love 'em.

So if I did see 'em,
I'd never tell anybody.

- See what?

- The dailies.

- No, no, see the problem
is, I said before,

I get embarrassed when anyone--

- No, no, you're right.

A deal's a deal, you're right.

- You know, soon we're
gonna wrap the picture

so, um, you know, we'll
cut it together and then--

- Am I barred from that too?

- No, I'd just like to present

the best possible
thing I can to you.

- You know, because this
is a $60 million movie,

and I'm just not
used to being kept

in the background like this.

Between you and me, this
is my valentine to Ellie.

You know a lot of people

didn't think you and
I could work together.

Personality clashes and
all that personal history.

But I think if two people are
really mature, yeah, hello.

- I'll let myself out.

It's okay, don't worry.

Hi, yeah, is
the yacht available?

'Cause I wanna do
the whole honeymoon

up and down the Amalfi coast.

But it's gotta be that yacht.

But, because that's
the only yacht

that I think is romantic enough

for my honeymoon, that's why.

All right, okay, good.

You okay?

- Yes, yes, I'm.

- Come on, I'll show you out.

- Oh, yes.

- I know you've had a rough day.

Oh, the front door.

Yeah.

- Cut!

There's more, Mr. Yeager

but those few hours
is a good selection.

- Okay, Wally, thanks.

Listen, this is our
little secret, okay?

- Yes, sir.

- Ladies and gentlemen,
the National Society

of Video Sales is proud to honor

the movie industry's
man of the year,

the incomparable Hal Yeager.

- Time was we made more money

at the box office
than video sales.

Now the big push we give a
film for theatrical release

is really just a prelude
to making it a large hit

in your over-the-counter sales.

- Boy, did they
love you, you know.

I thought they were gonna
lift you up on their shoulders

and carry you around the room.

- I just told the truth.

Hi.

- You're drunk.

- Oh, a little.

- A little?

- Okay, a lot.

- Definitely.

- You know, it's
not easy sitting

through three hours
of pure adulation.

- Frankly, I'm telling you, I
don't know how you can do it.

- Well, you don't wanna rob 'em
of the opportunity of, you know,

demonstrating their gratitude.

- Well, no wonder we both

have to drink so much
at these affairs.

- You know, if I
wasn't a little drunk,

I wouldn't bring this up.

Bring what up?

- The dailies.

What dailies?

- Val's dailies, The
City That Never Sleeps.

Well, I'm
hopeful, you know?

You can't ever judge
a film by the dailies.

It's just a bunch of little
bits and pieces out of sequence.

You really have to wait until
the whole thing's been cut--

- Well, I was very disappointed.

You saw them?

That's just between us.

How?

I was
somewhat disappointed.

- I can't, God, I
can't believe you.

I can't, he trusted you.

- Honey, I didn't
get to run a studio

by kowtowing to the
temperamental demands

of every director who
thinks he's Orson Wells.

- But you gave him your word

that you were not gonna do that.

- Honey, unless this
guy has some vision

of how to cut this
thing in his head,

we're on some very
shaky ground here.

- Well, I disagree, I disagree.

You know what?

I think that the dallies are--

- The dailies are what?

Nothing makes sense.

The angles, the
performances, the coverage.

There is no coverage.

- Well, I trust his instinct.

- Look, honey, this was
supposed to be a nice,

middle-of-the-road,
commercial picture.

That's it.

- Yeah, and the deal was also
that you were not

gonna look at his work

until he was ready
to show it to you.

- I gave in to those
demands to please you.

That guy, I mean,
he could've come in

and begged for the job

and he wouldn't have gotten
it, for Christ's sakes.

- The point of this
is that you said,

you said one thing to his face

and then you go right around

and do something
else behind his back.

- Oh Christ, you make
it sound sinister.

I'm responsible for a
very huge chunk of money.

I know.

- I have a studio
to run sweetheart.

- Yes, I know, I
know, I know, okay.

If you're disappointed,

then I guess it's me that you
should be disappointed in.

- Now what's that
supposed to mean?

- Because, well, I saw
some of the footage.

You know, and I was a
little baffled, okay?

But you know what?

But, look, maybe I
should have told you,

maybe I should have told you.

I don't know but the point is

that half of it was in
the can anyway, and, look.

Listen, he's the genuine
talent here, okay?

You know, who says
that we're right?

The guy's a genius.

- Let's just hope he has
some vision in his head

of cutting this thing
together, for all our sakes.

And he never has to
know I saw the dailies.

I'm not tampering, and
you should've warned me.

I mean, I don't ever wanna
wonder about your loyalties.

- Well.

- Oh, look, I'm, I'm sorry,
I'm sorry, I'm drunk.

Let's just, let's
just call it a night.

- Okay.

- Cut!

- Val, check the gate?

Check the gate.

Thank you, everyone.

See you tonight
at the wrap party.

That was a tremendous
job you've all done.

Please use taxis or
designated drivers.

- So I know you're happy
to be leaving New York.

What is the thing you
miss most about L.A?

- Miss most about L.A?

I miss my support group.

They're really
helping emotionally.

I'm a member of a support
group of film executives

who can't afford their own G-5s.

- Have you seen Val?

- Uh, I don't think he's here.

- Great, a director who doesn't
come to his own wrap party.

- I called him at
home, he's not there.

I'm worried.

- Hi, hi, Ellie!

Over here!

Oh, you have to meet them.

Excuse me, excuse me, hi.

This is Sandor.

- How do you do?

- Where's Val?

- Uh, he didn't come.

- Ooh, oh, oh, oh, my goodness.

Everybody's so
sophisticated, I love it.

- Uh, I have your father here.

- You're joking.

- Tony?

- Be careful.

- Don't bump into anything.

- Tony?

- No.

- I'll wait outside.

- Tony?

- What's wrong with
you, you blind?

Me, yeah.

- Psychosomatic.

How do you know?

- You never get any real things.

Here.

I'll take you to the couch.

Keep walking.

All right, turn around.

There you go.

Sit down.

Don't ask me why I came.

I didn't.

- Aren't you curious after
the last couple of years?

- Well, are you gonna
officially disown me?

- No, I came for the
exact opposite reason.

I wanna make friends.

I was never mad at you.

- How can you say that?

You pushed me down
a flight of stairs.

- I was high.

In those years I did drugs,
I did acid and peyote.

- Where did you
learn to do drugs?

From you,

you took all those tranquilizers
and mood elevators.

- There's a big
difference between that

and breaking into a drugstore

SO you can buy hashish.

- Those days are over,
they were very stupid.

- You know, what happened to us?

How did we grow so far apart?

You know, we used to
do things together.

We were, we were, God, you
know, I played with you.

I took you fishing.

- I didn't wanna go fishing.

- I didn't take you
against your will.

Then, you wanted to go fishing.

You wanted to learn the
violin, I got you a violin.

- That led me to the drums.

Yes, but how did
violin go to the drums?

That I've never understood.

- It's music.

- Hey, an electronic band
where you rip off your shirt

and eat a live rat is not music.

- We sold out that concert.

- And don't call it a concert.

Heifetz at Carnegie
Hall is a concert.

If there's a brownout,
Heifetz will still be on key,

but your guitar player won't be.

- You come here to knock me?

- I came to hold
out an olive branch.

- An olive branch?

What is this, the
Israeli Parliament?

I'm your son.

- I know you're my son,
that's what I'm saying.

I want us to, you know,
to get back together again

To, you know, to go fishing.

I hate fishing.

- I don't mean literally
go fishing in water.

I, you know, I'm
saying that I love you

despite the orange hair

and the nose rings and the
nipple rings and the tattoos.

It's no wonder I went blind.

- Can I help it if I took a
quantum leap from your values?

- What's wrong with my values?

I don't understand.

I was nice to your mother.

I didn't steal anything, I
never consumed any rodents.

How is your mother,
incidentally?

- She's great, they're in Rio.

She has no trouble accepting me.

- Yeah, of course she has no
trouble 'cause you're here

and she moved to the equator.

- I wanna be friends with you.

I respect what
you've tried to do.

You have to respect my goals.

I did some dopey things.

I apologize, let's
not make a big deal.

We don't have to go fishing,

but we really have
a lot in common.

We're both trying to
do something original,

you with film and
me with a live rat.

- Oh, Tony.

Tony, Tony.

- By the way, I changed my
name, it's not Tony anymore.

- It's not?

What is it?

- Scumbag X.

- Oh, that's nice.

It's much better
than Tony Waxman.

I love you, Scumbag.

Events
moved pretty rapidly

once the movie wrapped.

Ellie stayed in New York

and helped Val fake his
way through the editing.

They spent a lot
of time together,

and then, suddenly one day.

- I can see.

Ellie, Ellie, Ellie.

I can see.

- What?

-I can see, I can
see, I can see.

Everything looks
so beautiful to me.

The city looks so incredible.

- Val, are you?

- I can, I can see.

- Are you?

- You look so beautiful.

You look so great.

- Oh, well.

- You look so beautiful.

- Come on, I swear.

You're like a different person.

- You mean I was never pretty?

- You were always pretty,
but now you're beautiful.

- Come on, I can see.

I can't believe this.

I can see, you
look so beautiful.

I'm overwhelmed.

- Well, that's
how it is when you

go blind for a while, you know.

Oh, Val!

Oh, my God!

- Come on!

- Call Dr. Kevorkian.

- Val.

- This is the worst,

this looks like the
work of a blind man.

- Come on.

You're, you're scaring me.

I mean, I, Hal means to
preview this in two weeks

to get some audience
reaction and.

- The audience will

rush into the projection booth

and grab the print and
hurl it into the sea.

- Here are the rest of the
cards the audience filled out.

- Well, you know, they're
practically unanimous.

- An incoherent, stupid
waste of celluloid.

- Would you recommend
this film to a friend?

Only if I was
friendly with Hitler.

- These are all just terrible.

- Please stop, just
stop, stop already.

- How would you
improve this movie?

Arson.

- What would you say was
the best moment in the film?

- That's the audience.

It's not the critics, and
the reviews will be good,

and the public will get with it.

- Oh, yeah.

How would you
characterize the genre?

Early American Garbage.

- Well, I'm crushed over the
reception the movie's gotten.

I thought some of the reviews
were particularly scathing.

I hope Val's okay.

- That's not what
I wanna talk about.

- Okay.

- I got an advance copy

of the story that
Andrea Ford wrote

on the making of the picture.

She hasn't even
turned it in yet.

She wanted some
comments from me.

I tried to talk her out of it.

- Look, Andrea Ford is a
cheap tabloid gossipmonger.

I never thought
it was a good idea

having her hang around
on the set all the time.

- She said that Val Waxman
directed the picture blind.

That all throughout the shooting

he was a victim of
psychosomatic blindness.

Did I do wrong to deny that?

- Huh.

- He shot the whole picture
without ever seeing it?

- Otherwise, you would have
gotten the movie you wanted.

She wrote that
you knew about this

and you helped him hide it.

- Only the last few weeks.

I found out pretty much
after that boat had sailed.

And you didn't tell me.

- I knew you'd be apoplectic

and Val couldn't afford
to lose another job,

and under those
circumstances, I.

- You cared more about him than
you did about Galaxie, huh?

- I truly believed
he could pull it off.

- And the two of you were seen

kissing passionately on several
occasions around the set.

- We were faking it.

We told his roommate that
we had gotten back together

so she wouldn't move
back in with him

because she'd figure
out that he was blind--

- Did you fall back in
love with your ex-husband?

- No.

- You know you can
tell me the truth

'cause it really
doesn't much matter now.

- I think I never
stopped loving him.

You know that
when this story hits,

he'll never be employable again.

- Well, you don't
need the story.

I think the reviews pretty
much took care of that.

- I wouldn't spend 30 seconds
on what those critics said.

They represent the lowest
level of the culture.

- No, this time they're right.

The movie is incoherent,

the performances are
all over the place,

and the camera
work is unfocused.

- Worse has been
said about my work.

I just eat another rat.

Oh, Jesus, I
hope Ellie is okay.

- I always liked Ellie.

Didn't I read that
she was marrying

that quintessential
neanderthal, Yeager?

- Talk about blindness.

She was right under
my nose for so long,

and I didn't appreciate her.

- Blindness as metaphor.

That's great.

- Guess what?

- Guess what, what?

- The movie, your movie.

The French have seen
your movie in Paris

and they say it's the greatest
American film in 50 years.

- You're kidding.

- No, no, no, no.

You're being hailed
as a true artist.

A great genius.

And France sets the tone for
the rest of Europe, right?

Right, and I have offers for you

already to make
a movie in Paris.

A love story in
Paris, Paris, France.

Where they talk, they
talk French, you know.

- They--

- It's like New York.

- This is the best news
I, this is unbelievable.

- I love it.

- Because here I'm a bum.

- But there--

- A genius.

- A genius.

- A genius.

- Oh, thank God
the French exist.

This is my life's dream, that
we're gonna live in Paris.

I can't tell you
how thrilled I am.

I can't believe it.

- Are you sure?

I mean, it's a really big step.

- I'm absolutely, you know,
you look so beautiful.

Every husband should go
blind for a little while.

Hey, you didn't forget
the Dramamine, did you?