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1
00:00:07,458 --> 00:00:12,458
[speaks alien language]
2
00:00:12,458 --> 00:00:15,375
Ugh. What's the alien word
for "soup"?
3
00:00:15,375 --> 00:00:16,833
Oh, soup? Uh...
4
00:00:16,833 --> 00:00:21,000
[speaks alien language]
5
00:00:22,875 --> 00:00:25,500
For aliens, soup is a really
complicated concept.
6
00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:27,875
It's a food
that you drink and chew.
7
00:00:28,708 --> 00:00:30,875
Which is crazy. Crazy.
8
00:00:37,583 --> 00:00:40,833
Can you please tell me
what the point of
Alien Language League is?
9
00:00:40,833 --> 00:00:44,458
It's like, if aliens
come to Earth, they should
just speak Earth.
10
00:00:46,083 --> 00:00:48,833
Alex, clubs provide
a positive environment
11
00:00:48,833 --> 00:00:50,416
for people with
like interests.
12
00:00:50,416 --> 00:00:52,458
Which is why I joined
Alien Language League.
13
00:00:53,625 --> 00:00:55,125
You don't like
alien language.
14
00:00:55,625 --> 00:00:57,166
Nope.
15
00:00:57,166 --> 00:00:58,583
But I like Zeke.
16
00:01:03,750 --> 00:01:06,208
[speaks alien]
17
00:01:06,208 --> 00:01:07,583
[both reply in alien]
18
00:01:07,583 --> 00:01:09,375
Uh-uh! No.
19
00:01:09,375 --> 00:01:12,000
Hey, you wanna-be-aliens
leave my friend alone.
20
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:14,458
She's the only one who sees
through me and sticks around.
21
00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:18,291
Relax, Alex. I'm just
helping them plan their banquet.
22
00:01:18,291 --> 00:01:19,625
- Mm-hmm.
- [scoffs]
23
00:01:19,625 --> 00:01:22,000
Why do people make such big
deals out of banquets?
24
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,458
It's like,
"Hey, let's all sit around
25
00:01:24,458 --> 00:01:27,416
and listen to stupid speeches
while we all eat
the same exact meal."
26
00:01:28,875 --> 00:01:30,708
I like eating the same
as everyone else.
27
00:01:30,708 --> 00:01:33,500
That way I never feel bad
about ordering wrong.
28
00:01:36,958 --> 00:01:40,000
Well, I mean, I'd be OK with it
if we all ate my favorite meal.
29
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,625
Biscuits and loose corn.
30
00:01:42,333 --> 00:01:44,166
Loose corn?
31
00:01:44,166 --> 00:01:47,458
[scoffs] It's just called corn.
32
00:01:49,166 --> 00:01:52,375
I like it cut off the cob.
Cobs are too heavy.
33
00:01:52,375 --> 00:01:55,416
Eighty percent of the weight
you're picking up
you're not even eating.
34
00:01:56,625 --> 00:01:58,750
OK, every year the Alien
Language League hands out
35
00:01:58,750 --> 00:02:01,458
the Lifetime Achievement Award
to a graduating senior.
36
00:02:01,458 --> 00:02:04,708
And I have it on good authority
that I have it in the bag.
37
00:02:04,708 --> 00:02:07,416
This year it really will
be the best year ever...
38
00:02:07,416 --> 00:02:08,708
...for me!
39
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:12,416
Plus, we got Joey
"The Crepe Kid," coming in.
40
00:02:12,416 --> 00:02:14,208
He's the youngest
crepe chef in the city.
41
00:02:14,208 --> 00:02:17,125
He makes crepes from all around
the world. It's gonna be...
42
00:02:17,125 --> 00:02:18,208
...crepe-tacular.
43
00:02:19,583 --> 00:02:22,875
You know, Zeke. You are so
cute when you're easily excited.
44
00:02:22,875 --> 00:02:25,333
But I'm always easily excited.
45
00:02:25,333 --> 00:02:26,708
I know.
46
00:02:33,166 --> 00:02:36,708
And guys, guess what?
The banquet is gonna
be here in the Sub Shop,
47
00:02:36,708 --> 00:02:38,750
so the whole family can come.
48
00:02:38,750 --> 00:02:42,208
Mm-hmm, yeah. I don't
need to know when it is,
because I'm busy.
49
00:02:42,208 --> 00:02:46,125
Ooh, no, because I checked
your calendar and you've got
no plans for the next 30 years.
50
00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:49,291
Ha. I don't have a calendar.
51
00:02:49,291 --> 00:02:52,583
Ha. People who don't have
calendars also don't have plans.
52
00:02:52,583 --> 00:02:55,458
Owned! So hard!
Owned!
53
00:02:58,875 --> 00:03:00,750
Yeah, sometimes he wins.
54
00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:05,250
♪ Well, you know everything's
gonna be a breeze ♪
55
00:03:05,250 --> 00:03:07,375
♪ That the end will no doubt
justify the means ♪
56
00:03:07,375 --> 00:03:09,500
♪ You can fix any problem
with the slightest of ease ♪
57
00:03:09,500 --> 00:03:10,958
♪ Yes, please ♪
58
00:03:10,958 --> 00:03:12,875
♪ But you might find out
it'll go to your head ♪
59
00:03:12,875 --> 00:03:14,833
♪ When you write a report
on a book you never read ♪
60
00:03:14,833 --> 00:03:17,458
♪ With the snap of your fingers
you can make your bed ♪
61
00:03:17,458 --> 00:03:18,958
♪ That's what I said ♪
62
00:03:18,958 --> 00:03:22,125
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
63
00:03:22,125 --> 00:03:26,125
♪ When you can get all you
wanted in your wildest dreams ♪
64
00:03:26,125 --> 00:03:29,750
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪
65
00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:34,333
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
66
00:03:34,333 --> 00:03:37,625
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
67
00:03:37,625 --> 00:03:41,833
♪ When you can have what you
want by the simplest of means ♪
68
00:03:41,833 --> 00:03:45,125
♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪
69
00:03:45,125 --> 00:03:48,291
♪ Because everything is not ♪
70
00:03:49,458 --> 00:03:51,416
♪ What it seems ♪♪
71
00:04:17,125 --> 00:04:18,458
[fairy giggles]
72
00:04:20,166 --> 00:04:22,000
- [Jerry screams]
- [clattering]
73
00:04:24,416 --> 00:04:26,416
[tiny creatures grunting]
74
00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:31,458
Hey, you're grouchy.
75
00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:34,291
Your hands smell
like delicious chocolate.
76
00:04:36,250 --> 00:04:37,291
[creatures screaming]
77
00:04:37,291 --> 00:04:39,708
Dad, pocket elves can't fly.
78
00:04:42,458 --> 00:04:44,000
Oops.
79
00:04:45,083 --> 00:04:47,708
Alex, how many times
do I have to tell you
80
00:04:47,708 --> 00:04:49,500
to keep the portal door closed?!
81
00:04:50,458 --> 00:04:52,000
At least one more?
82
00:04:53,583 --> 00:04:57,083
We can't have
Wizard World creatures
drifting in here all the time.
83
00:04:57,083 --> 00:04:59,708
It gets so stuffy in here.
84
00:04:59,708 --> 00:05:02,416
Mostly because our lair
is inside a produce locker
85
00:05:02,416 --> 00:05:06,583
where you don't throw out
vegetables until they start
growing other vegetables.
86
00:05:06,583 --> 00:05:09,833
Hey, we haven't paid for
mushrooms in over ten years.
87
00:05:09,833 --> 00:05:11,375
[scoffs]
88
00:05:11,375 --> 00:05:12,625
[buzzing]
89
00:05:14,583 --> 00:05:16,458
You see!
You let a wizard bug in.
90
00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:19,000
- Get the door!
- Get...
91
00:05:21,875 --> 00:05:23,000
What...?!
92
00:05:28,875 --> 00:05:31,708
Oh! I need a bigger broom.
One that stays together.
93
00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:34,958
Where'd it go?
94
00:05:36,458 --> 00:05:38,583
Dad. Don't move.
It's on your back.
95
00:05:41,208 --> 00:05:43,250
Come on, get it!
Ooh, not with that!
96
00:05:43,250 --> 00:05:44,875
You're gonna kill
the bug and me!
97
00:05:46,833 --> 00:05:48,875
Ow! It bit me!
98
00:05:51,833 --> 00:05:53,333
It's dead.
99
00:05:54,583 --> 00:05:56,458
[squish]
100
00:05:56,458 --> 00:05:59,250
Now it's a stain.
[chuckles]
101
00:06:01,458 --> 00:06:03,625
Oh, it really hurts.
102
00:06:03,625 --> 00:06:05,000
Did it leave a mark?
103
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:06,000
Oh.
104
00:06:09,333 --> 00:06:12,416
Oh... no.
You can't even see it.
105
00:06:12,416 --> 00:06:13,833
I'll go get
my magnifying glass,
106
00:06:13,833 --> 00:06:15,875
'cause I, I don't even
know where the bite is.
107
00:06:32,458 --> 00:06:34,500
- [bell dings]
- Ooh!
108
00:06:34,500 --> 00:06:35,958
[sizzling]
109
00:06:36,875 --> 00:06:38,333
[laughs]
110
00:06:41,458 --> 00:06:43,583
You have a popcorn machine
in your locker?
111
00:06:43,583 --> 00:06:46,250
- Where do you keep your books?
- In your locker.
112
00:06:47,833 --> 00:06:50,125
I have a locker?
You said only girls get them.
113
00:06:51,875 --> 00:06:53,583
[alarm blares]
114
00:06:56,833 --> 00:07:00,333
[alien accent] Attention...
citizens of Tribeca Prep.
115
00:07:00,333 --> 00:07:02,833
- Ahh. Ahh.
- Ahh. Ahh.
116
00:07:02,833 --> 00:07:06,208
Do not be alarmed
for we come in peace.
117
00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:09,375
[alien accent] Ahh.
We have traveled the far
reaches of the galaxy
118
00:07:09,375 --> 00:07:11,708
to deliver you
a special message.
119
00:07:11,708 --> 00:07:13,208
- Special.
- Oh.
120
00:07:16,125 --> 00:07:19,583
[alien accent] Tonight
all members of the Alien
Language League are required
121
00:07:19,583 --> 00:07:22,291
to report to a secret
last minute location...
122
00:07:22,291 --> 00:07:24,083
[both] Ahh.
123
00:07:24,083 --> 00:07:26,250
...the Waverly Sub Station.
124
00:07:26,250 --> 00:07:28,333
Ohh... Waverly...
125
00:07:28,333 --> 00:07:31,208
Where you will enjoy the finest
alien-themed entertainment,
126
00:07:31,208 --> 00:07:33,875
including crepes
made by Joey The Crepe Kid.
127
00:07:33,875 --> 00:07:36,000
- Joey!
- [crowd] Yeah!
128
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,000
- Yeah!
- Whoo!
129
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,166
- All right!
- Joey!
130
00:07:40,166 --> 00:07:42,708
- That went well.
- Yes, it did. [clears throat]
131
00:07:42,708 --> 00:07:46,833
[normal voice] Well...
We now return you to your
regularly scheduled classes.
132
00:07:46,833 --> 00:07:47,958
All right.
133
00:07:48,833 --> 00:07:50,625
Thank you, you're great.
134
00:07:50,625 --> 00:07:54,833
Hey, guys. If Joey The Crepe Kid
is in, MacGruder is in.
135
00:07:54,833 --> 00:07:57,750
This totally tops
the Math Club's taco bar.
136
00:07:57,750 --> 00:08:00,291
- Yeah. Tacos are gross.
- Yes! Math? Losers.
137
00:08:00,291 --> 00:08:02,000
What's a taco?
138
00:08:03,625 --> 00:08:06,583
Alex, all these alien theatrics
have given me an idea.
139
00:08:07,708 --> 00:08:09,750
I'm going to start
an alien language club.
140
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:14,583
That's what this is.
Alien Language League.
141
00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:17,083
Don't tell them what I'm doing
or they're gonna copy me.
142
00:08:18,375 --> 00:08:20,291
They're already doing it.
143
00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:22,083
Not if I do it first.
144
00:08:23,375 --> 00:08:24,958
May the best club win.
145
00:08:28,166 --> 00:08:29,583
You are a delight.
146
00:08:31,291 --> 00:08:33,000
Zeke, that was great!
147
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,583
I'm so glad we kept
that smoke machine
148
00:08:34,583 --> 00:08:36,333
from our failed
DJ business.
149
00:08:36,333 --> 00:08:39,958
I still think
ZJ the DJs can work.
150
00:08:39,958 --> 00:08:41,958
Wikki-wikki. Me, too.
151
00:08:41,958 --> 00:08:44,000
[both beat boxing]
152
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:47,083
Dude! You think I can use it
when I accept my Lifetime
Achievement Award?
153
00:08:47,083 --> 00:08:51,333
Right on. You, sir, are my
bro-dre from another mo-dre.
154
00:08:51,333 --> 00:08:54,416
[both laugh, beat box]
155
00:08:57,083 --> 00:09:00,583
You cannot tell me that
you're still into Zeke
after that nerd circus.
156
00:09:00,583 --> 00:09:03,166
[imitating light saber sounds]
157
00:09:03,166 --> 00:09:05,166
[both shouting]
158
00:09:07,500 --> 00:09:09,166
Still into him.
159
00:09:16,875 --> 00:09:19,125
Uh... Excuse me,
160
00:09:19,125 --> 00:09:21,375
Joey The Crepe Kid,
where is your sign?
161
00:09:21,375 --> 00:09:23,875
When people walk into places
they like big signs
162
00:09:23,875 --> 00:09:25,583
to tell them
what's going on.
163
00:09:25,583 --> 00:09:29,875
Nah. I think it's pretty
self-explanatory, Mrs. Russo,
164
00:09:29,875 --> 00:09:31,708
When people walk up
to my crepe station
165
00:09:31,708 --> 00:09:33,750
and see what's going on.
I'm just sayin'.
166
00:09:33,750 --> 00:09:35,458
You know. [clicks]
167
00:09:35,458 --> 00:09:38,583
Are you setting up here some
sort of pumpkin carving booth?
168
00:09:38,583 --> 00:09:39,625
Whoa!
169
00:09:41,208 --> 00:09:43,333
We need a sign. Just sayin'.
170
00:09:45,458 --> 00:09:48,458
Hey, Mom. I'm having my new
Alien Language Club over later.
171
00:09:48,458 --> 00:09:52,875
Max, honey,
we're having a banquet
for Alien Language League.
172
00:09:52,875 --> 00:09:55,833
Nice! Thank you
for your support.
173
00:09:57,500 --> 00:10:00,416
Hey, Joey, lookin' good.
174
00:10:00,416 --> 00:10:02,125
Lookin' good.
175
00:10:02,125 --> 00:10:04,208
You, uh, you need a hand,
you know, chef to chef?
176
00:10:04,208 --> 00:10:06,583
- Where's the other chef?
- Hey, come on.
177
00:10:06,583 --> 00:10:08,708
[all gasping]
178
00:10:09,708 --> 00:10:11,458
What's wrong with your hand?
179
00:10:11,458 --> 00:10:13,375
[stammers] Uh, nothing.
180
00:10:13,375 --> 00:10:15,583
Nothing's wrong. I just
have a skin condition
181
00:10:15,583 --> 00:10:18,458
that flares up every
once in a while and, um...
182
00:10:18,458 --> 00:10:20,875
- I don't moisturize enough.
- Moisturize.
183
00:10:22,708 --> 00:10:25,333
Dad, you're turning
into a bug.
184
00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:28,375
I know. I think it's because
I got bit by a wizard bug
185
00:10:28,375 --> 00:10:30,708
when Alex left
the portal door open.
186
00:10:30,708 --> 00:10:33,375
You're gonna lose control
and run around all crazy.
187
00:10:33,375 --> 00:10:35,875
You've seen what the bugs do
when you turn the lights on.
188
00:10:35,875 --> 00:10:37,708
They lose control
and run around all crazy.
189
00:10:37,708 --> 00:10:40,750
I'm just gonna find something
to cover my hand with.
190
00:10:40,750 --> 00:10:44,166
With what?! They don't
make roach mittens!
191
00:10:46,208 --> 00:10:49,000
I'm sure it'll be fine. He'll
be back to normal in no time.
192
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,625
- [sighs]
- [squishy sound]
193
00:10:50,625 --> 00:10:53,333
[screams]
194
00:10:53,333 --> 00:10:55,500
What? Oh!
195
00:10:55,500 --> 00:10:57,708
This place is disgusting.
196
00:10:57,708 --> 00:11:00,083
That's the biggest bug
I ever seen.
197
00:11:00,083 --> 00:11:03,708
- [Jerry gasping]
- [Joey whistles]
Get the car goin'!
198
00:11:09,458 --> 00:11:11,958
Jerry, are you in here?
199
00:11:11,958 --> 00:11:13,875
[screams] Bright lights!
200
00:11:13,875 --> 00:11:15,833
Bright lights! [shouts]
201
00:11:20,875 --> 00:11:22,083
My husband's a bug.
202
00:11:22,083 --> 00:11:23,750
I should have married
Marty Stoller.
203
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,166
I'd be a dentist's wife.
204
00:11:26,583 --> 00:11:28,875
First we lose Joey
The Crepe Kid and now this?
205
00:11:28,875 --> 00:11:32,625
This is not the proper
atmosphere in which to receive
the Lifetime Achievement Award.
206
00:11:35,333 --> 00:11:37,583
Dad's a bug? I get
to flick him first!
207
00:11:39,208 --> 00:11:40,500
Ah!
208
00:11:42,708 --> 00:11:44,000
I'm so sorry, Justin.
209
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:45,333
But we can't
have people here
210
00:11:45,333 --> 00:11:47,708
while your Dad is
flitting around like crazy.
211
00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:49,500
Even if we try to lock him up,
212
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,416
he'll eat his way
through the door.
213
00:11:51,416 --> 00:11:54,708
He already can eat his way
through take-out containers
with human teeth.
214
00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:58,125
We're gonna have
to cancel the banquet.
215
00:11:58,125 --> 00:11:59,583
[scoffs] Not my banquet!
216
00:11:59,583 --> 00:12:01,708
Look. Some confusing
stuff's going on.
217
00:12:01,708 --> 00:12:03,458
We all need to make
some sacrifices.
218
00:12:04,333 --> 00:12:06,000
Say we cancel Justin's banquet.
219
00:12:07,291 --> 00:12:08,833
Mine will go on.
220
00:12:11,250 --> 00:12:13,875
We are not cancelling
the banquet.
221
00:12:13,875 --> 00:12:16,208
Come on.
We're the Russos.
222
00:12:16,208 --> 00:12:19,750
We can't let something small
like Dad turning into
223
00:12:19,750 --> 00:12:21,625
a life-sized,
disgusting roach
224
00:12:21,625 --> 00:12:25,625
ruin Justin's
senior year moment.
We are the Russos!
225
00:12:27,583 --> 00:12:30,875
- No matter how many times
you say "We are the Russos"...
- [whispers] We are the Russos.
226
00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:33,833
...you can't hide the fact
this is another of my
senior year moments
227
00:12:33,833 --> 00:12:36,500
- that you wanna see wrecked.
- [whispers] We're the Russos.
228
00:12:37,166 --> 00:12:38,458
Unlike you,
229
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:40,416
I'm only going to have
one senior year moment,
230
00:12:40,416 --> 00:12:42,625
so I'm trying
to get this one right.
Don't say it!
231
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,708
And I am gonna make sure
232
00:12:45,708 --> 00:12:48,500
that you get your
senior year moment, Justin.
233
00:12:48,500 --> 00:12:50,750
This is just a little bug bite.
234
00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:52,625
I'm sure I can
control myself.
235
00:12:54,416 --> 00:12:56,708
Dad! I don't know how many times
I'm gonna tell you,
236
00:12:56,708 --> 00:13:00,000
it's not a bite.
You're a dirty, nasty bug.
237
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:03,458
Hey! That is no way to talk
to your exoskeleton father!
238
00:13:05,250 --> 00:13:08,166
OK, I don't know what
we're gonna do, 'cause
these things last days.
239
00:13:08,166 --> 00:13:10,375
Hey! I still have my face.
240
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:16,000
Uh, here's an idea,
I'll just throw on
an overcoat and a top hat
241
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,083
and I'll, I'll just...
blend right in.
242
00:13:19,416 --> 00:13:22,083
Jerry, you're not
gonna blend right in.
243
00:13:22,083 --> 00:13:26,000
You need to stay up in the loft
until this thing
runs its course.
244
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:28,458
Great. Are we voting?
245
00:13:28,458 --> 00:13:31,291
'Cause I like the idea
of the top hat and overcoat.
Who's with me?
246
00:13:32,083 --> 00:13:34,458
OK, OK. I'll stay upstairs.
247
00:13:34,458 --> 00:13:38,250
If someone tapes a spatula
to my claw,
248
00:13:38,250 --> 00:13:40,833
and someone else catches
the goo falling from my face,
249
00:13:40,833 --> 00:13:42,833
I'm pretty sure
I can make the crepes.
250
00:13:45,875 --> 00:13:47,500
Dibs on catching the goo.
251
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:52,583
Thank you so much
for coming to my club.
It really means a lot.
252
00:13:52,583 --> 00:13:55,416
Thank you for joining.
Always a pleasure
to see you, buddy!
253
00:13:55,416 --> 00:13:57,208
Ha-ha! Thank you for coming.
254
00:13:57,208 --> 00:13:59,291
Thank you so much
for joining my club.
255
00:13:59,291 --> 00:14:02,458
Wow. Look how many people
showed up for my club.
256
00:14:02,458 --> 00:14:03,958
It's very humbling.
257
00:14:06,625 --> 00:14:07,625
[clears throat]
258
00:14:07,625 --> 00:14:11,000
[speaks alien]
259
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:14,625
- [mouths] Little. Louder.
- Excuse me, can I have
your attention please?
260
00:14:14,625 --> 00:14:17,458
[clears throat] Excuse me,
261
00:14:17,458 --> 00:14:19,875
if you could please just...
If your attention...
262
00:14:19,875 --> 00:14:22,875
Could you just focus...
on me for a second?
263
00:14:22,875 --> 00:14:24,166
That would be good.
264
00:14:25,208 --> 00:14:26,583
I think I can help.
265
00:14:29,083 --> 00:14:31,750
Listen up, people!
266
00:14:31,750 --> 00:14:34,208
I know where all of you live,
so shut it,
267
00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:37,250
or I'll make a guest appearance
in each and every one
of your nightmares!
268
00:14:40,333 --> 00:14:42,083
Have a nice banquet!
269
00:14:43,625 --> 00:14:47,750
OK, welcome to this year's
Alien Language League banquet.
270
00:14:47,750 --> 00:14:50,208
[speaks alien]
271
00:14:50,208 --> 00:14:52,291
[all answer in alien]
272
00:14:52,291 --> 00:14:55,125
- [Zeke] Great.
- Where is Joey The Crepe Kid?
273
00:14:55,125 --> 00:14:56,458
His crepes are the only reason
274
00:14:56,458 --> 00:15:00,708
I spent $50 on an Alien
Language dictionary.
275
00:15:00,708 --> 00:15:03,625
We have something even better
than Joey The Crepe Kid.
276
00:15:03,625 --> 00:15:05,125
Why don't you sit on down?
277
00:15:05,125 --> 00:15:06,958
Go check on the crepes.
278
00:15:06,958 --> 00:15:08,750
My banquet,
my problem.
279
00:15:10,750 --> 00:15:14,083
In the meantime,
our sci-fi movie scene players
280
00:15:14,083 --> 00:15:15,500
are gonna come up and perform
281
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:16,958
one of the greatest
282
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:21,000
alien scenes of all time,
283
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,833
E.T. Raids the Refrigerator.
284
00:15:23,833 --> 00:15:26,000
- [gasps] Huh? Oh, man.
- [crowd murmurs]
285
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,125
- Come on.
- Oh, man, exciting.
286
00:15:31,375 --> 00:15:33,750
OK, here's the last
batch of crepes.
287
00:15:33,750 --> 00:15:35,416
Oh, there you go.
288
00:15:35,416 --> 00:15:37,958
You see what we can do
when we work together?
289
00:15:37,958 --> 00:15:41,250
Yeah. See what I can do
while you yell,
"Faster, faster, faster!"
290
00:15:42,250 --> 00:15:44,000
Look, somebody has to be
the yeller.
291
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:45,750
[crunching]
292
00:15:45,750 --> 00:15:49,166
Guys, are my crepes ready yet?
My club members are getting...
[gasps]
293
00:15:50,708 --> 00:15:53,833
Jerry, please don't tell me
you just ate all the crepes?!
294
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:56,708
Technically, I didn't eat them.
295
00:15:56,708 --> 00:15:58,375
I vomited acid all over them,
296
00:15:58,375 --> 00:16:01,166
and when they liquefied
I slurped them up.
297
00:16:02,458 --> 00:16:05,208
Yeah, that's pretty much
how you normally eat.
298
00:16:06,708 --> 00:16:09,083
I don't think this is gonna
fly with my club members.
299
00:16:09,083 --> 00:16:11,333
They made it obvious
they're expecting crepes.
300
00:16:11,333 --> 00:16:15,000
Well, I was expecting
this whole thing to blow up
down there, not up here.
301
00:16:16,625 --> 00:16:19,416
This is kind of taking
all the fun out of it, though.
302
00:16:19,416 --> 00:16:20,458
I guess I'll help.
303
00:16:24,625 --> 00:16:27,875
I'll be right here.
304
00:16:27,875 --> 00:16:29,750
[sobs]
305
00:16:29,750 --> 00:16:31,708
[makes noise]
306
00:16:31,708 --> 00:16:34,875
Good by... E.T.
[sobs]
307
00:16:38,708 --> 00:16:40,000
[both] And scene.
308
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:43,208
[both speak alien]
309
00:16:43,208 --> 00:16:45,250
[all speak alien]
310
00:16:45,250 --> 00:16:47,500
Yeah, OK.
Wacka-wacka whatever.
311
00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:52,375
All right, bravo. This is
a great banquet so far, huh?
312
00:16:52,375 --> 00:16:55,500
All right, why don't we just
get right to the Lifetime
Achievement Award?
313
00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:58,833
Wait, we're supposed
to eat first.
OK, where are those crepes?
314
00:16:58,833 --> 00:17:00,875
When I say "crepes,"
you say "Oop-blopp!"
315
00:17:00,875 --> 00:17:03,291
- Crepes! Crepes!
- [all] Oop-blopp. Oop-blopp.
316
00:17:03,291 --> 00:17:07,000
Look! Unless you'll settle
for some tortillas
and some powdered sugar,
317
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:10,583
- you're not getting any crepes.
- [all groaning]
318
00:17:10,583 --> 00:17:13,291
Instead, we are having
319
00:17:13,291 --> 00:17:15,583
biscuits and loose corn.
320
00:17:15,583 --> 00:17:17,833
[all groaning]
321
00:17:17,833 --> 00:17:19,291
What's going on?
322
00:17:19,291 --> 00:17:20,833
Dad ate all the crepes.
323
00:17:20,833 --> 00:17:22,958
[whispers] No. I mean,
why are you helping me?
324
00:17:24,291 --> 00:17:26,625
Well, first of all,
this is an opportunity
325
00:17:26,625 --> 00:17:28,958
for me to get some
biscuits and loose corn.
326
00:17:30,125 --> 00:17:32,458
And second of all...
327
00:17:32,458 --> 00:17:34,875
- No, there was just one reason.
- Good.
328
00:17:34,875 --> 00:17:37,958
So, biscuits, loose corn,
and this lame entertainment?
329
00:17:37,958 --> 00:17:41,333
This is the worst banquet ever.
330
00:17:41,333 --> 00:17:43,708
I'm hungry and I am angry.
331
00:17:44,708 --> 00:17:46,250
I'm "hangry."
332
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:49,375
No, no, no!
Wait. Don't leave.
333
00:17:49,375 --> 00:17:50,833
Forget it, Alex.
It's over.
334
00:17:50,833 --> 00:17:52,708
I'm not gonna get
my Lifetime Achievement Award.
335
00:17:52,708 --> 00:17:54,000
Thanks a lot.
336
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:58,083
Look, besides the fact that
every guy in here cares more
337
00:17:58,083 --> 00:18:00,166
about having crepes
than having girlfriends,
338
00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:02,875
this is the wrong version
of ending badly I had in mind.
339
00:18:02,875 --> 00:18:06,000
If I'm not gonna get my way, at
least you should get your way.
340
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:08,291
- Harper. [clicks tongue]
- Hey!
341
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,416
Everybody sit down now!
342
00:18:17,416 --> 00:18:18,708
[mouths]
Good job, Zeke.
343
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,875
Oh. Wow. Now I've got
to think of something.
344
00:18:31,250 --> 00:18:34,625
OK, everyone. We have
a very special guest.
345
00:18:34,625 --> 00:18:36,875
Thank you for that
warm introduction, Alex.
346
00:18:36,875 --> 00:18:38,625
Not you.
[mouths] Sit down.
347
00:18:40,625 --> 00:18:42,708
We can't do this.
Dad's a wizard bug.
348
00:18:42,708 --> 00:18:43,958
No, no, no. It's OK.
349
00:18:43,958 --> 00:18:46,083
When you show people
something completely crazy,
350
00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:47,291
they try to make sense of it.
351
00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:53,083
Hey, everybody! It's an alien
from the Guaga galaxy!
352
00:18:53,083 --> 00:18:54,875
[all murmuring]
353
00:18:54,875 --> 00:18:55,875
Like that.
354
00:18:56,833 --> 00:18:57,875
Great costume!
355
00:18:57,875 --> 00:18:59,416
What did you make
the face goo out of?
356
00:18:59,416 --> 00:19:02,000
Oh, don't tell me. I don't
want to spoil the illusion.
357
00:19:03,958 --> 00:19:06,458
And, and he came in peace.
358
00:19:06,458 --> 00:19:08,708
- Ooh!
- Of course he did.
359
00:19:08,708 --> 00:19:11,583
The inhabitants of the Guaga
galaxy have been non-violent
360
00:19:11,583 --> 00:19:13,875
since the females moved
to the southern hemisphere.
361
00:19:13,875 --> 00:19:15,583
Yeah.
362
00:19:15,583 --> 00:19:18,708
- And he came to entertain you.
- Ooh!
363
00:19:18,708 --> 00:19:20,083
With impressions.
364
00:19:20,083 --> 00:19:22,416
The Guagians are
amazing at impressions.
365
00:19:23,500 --> 00:19:25,583
I'm not good
at impressions.
366
00:19:25,583 --> 00:19:28,958
Say anything. They're nerds.
They don't want to admit
they don't get something.
367
00:19:29,875 --> 00:19:32,291
Ahh, ahh...
368
00:19:32,291 --> 00:19:33,583
Howdy, everybody.
369
00:19:33,583 --> 00:19:34,958
It's Woody, from Toy Story!
370
00:19:36,458 --> 00:19:38,583
Look at the viscosity
of his face acid.
371
00:19:38,583 --> 00:19:40,625
That's what happens
to the Guagians
372
00:19:40,625 --> 00:19:42,416
in Earth's
extreme temperatures.
373
00:19:42,416 --> 00:19:44,458
Yeah, that's exactly right,
Zeke.
374
00:19:44,458 --> 00:19:45,625
Notice, everyone notice,
375
00:19:45,625 --> 00:19:48,458
his authentic spatula claw.
376
00:19:50,166 --> 00:19:52,208
[whispers] Why didn't you
remove his spatula claw?
377
00:19:52,208 --> 00:19:54,583
Yeah, no, that's not
just any spatula.
378
00:19:54,583 --> 00:19:56,875
That's an intergalactic spatula.
379
00:19:56,875 --> 00:19:59,291
Ooh!
380
00:19:59,291 --> 00:20:01,458
I can't believe
they're buying this.
381
00:20:02,875 --> 00:20:05,125
- They are your people.
- Yeah.
382
00:20:06,125 --> 00:20:07,750
Ahh...
383
00:20:07,750 --> 00:20:11,125
First, I'd like to apologize
for the lack of crepes.
384
00:20:11,125 --> 00:20:15,000
I was hungry from
my long journey and
I couldn't help myself.
385
00:20:17,333 --> 00:20:19,458
OK. So, without further ado,
386
00:20:19,458 --> 00:20:21,458
I would like
to present this year's
387
00:20:21,458 --> 00:20:24,208
Alien Language League
Lifetime Achievement Award
388
00:20:24,208 --> 00:20:26,375
to someone who
was smart enough
389
00:20:26,375 --> 00:20:29,250
to get in contact with my people
and have me here tonight:
390
00:20:30,583 --> 00:20:32,083
Justin Russo!
391
00:20:32,083 --> 00:20:34,000
[all applauding]
392
00:20:38,875 --> 00:20:41,458
- Thank you so much.
- Justin Russo?
393
00:20:41,458 --> 00:20:43,125
I was robbed!
394
00:20:43,125 --> 00:20:45,625
I poured my blood, sweat
and tears into this club.
395
00:20:57,625 --> 00:21:01,375
Wow. What a way to go out
in my senior year.
396
00:21:01,375 --> 00:21:03,125
I totally wasn't
expecting this.
397
00:21:03,125 --> 00:21:04,208
I mean, really.
398
00:21:04,208 --> 00:21:05,416
I absolutely wasn't.
399
00:21:06,875 --> 00:21:09,083
[exhales] I guess I'd
just like to say thank you
400
00:21:09,083 --> 00:21:11,291
to each and every one of you
that voted for me.
401
00:21:11,291 --> 00:21:13,291
And to those of you
that didn't...
402
00:21:13,291 --> 00:21:14,291
Hah!
403
00:21:15,958 --> 00:21:18,291
I... I really would
like to send a shout out
404
00:21:19,291 --> 00:21:20,708
right up there to my sister,
405
00:21:20,708 --> 00:21:23,208
for making this truly, truly
406
00:21:23,208 --> 00:21:27,250
the most memorable senior year
moment that...
407
00:21:27,250 --> 00:21:28,375
...I'll ever have.
408
00:21:30,958 --> 00:21:32,875
And please don't
let me have another.
409
00:21:42,458 --> 00:21:46,208
OK, round two of biscuits
and loose corn.
410
00:21:46,208 --> 00:21:48,500
- Hey, where did everybody go?
- Uh-uh. That's for me.
411
00:21:48,500 --> 00:21:51,583
Here, set it down.
Go get me Dad's big spoon.
I can't get enough of this.
412
00:21:53,125 --> 00:21:54,750
I don't care
about the food.
413
00:21:54,750 --> 00:21:57,333
- I'm just happy
that I got my trophy.
- [sloshing sounds]
414
00:21:58,875 --> 00:22:00,708
[belches] Uh-oh.
415
00:22:01,416 --> 00:22:02,875
Dad!
416
00:22:02,875 --> 00:22:04,458
You melted my trophy!
417
00:22:05,250 --> 00:22:06,583
[stammers] I was just
418
00:22:06,583 --> 00:22:08,166
trying to read the engraving.
30027
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