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1
00:01:39,364 --> 00:01:43,535
Have you ever confused
a dream with life?
2
00:01:45,904 --> 00:01:49,674
Or stolen something
when you have the cash?
3
00:01:53,712 --> 00:01:55,847
Have you ever been blue?
4
00:01:58,416 --> 00:02:02,287
Or thought your train moving
while sitting still?
5
00:02:04,456 --> 00:02:06,858
Maybe l was just crazy.
6
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:11,262
Maybe it was the '60s.
7
00:02:12,130 --> 00:02:14,466
Or maybe l was just a girl...
8
00:02:16,001 --> 00:02:17,402
... interrupted.
9
00:02:17,769 --> 00:02:19,771
Put her in restraints.
Withdraw bIood.
10
00:02:19,971 --> 00:02:20,805
HoId on.
11
00:02:21,006 --> 00:02:23,575
Give her five miIIigrams
of VaIium, IV.
12
00:02:24,943 --> 00:02:26,945
Turn her head so she doesn't aspirate.
13
00:02:27,312 --> 00:02:28,213
There you go.
14
00:02:29,447 --> 00:02:31,449
Aspirin fragments
and vodka, I think.
15
00:02:31,750 --> 00:02:34,619
Don't teII me what you think.
Take it to the Iab.
16
00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:38,957
You shouId check my hand.
There's no bones in it.
17
00:02:39,157 --> 00:02:40,091
A wrist banger.
18
00:02:41,159 --> 00:02:45,196
Is that why you did this?
And other things.
19
00:02:45,864 --> 00:02:47,866
Her parents are on the way.
20
00:02:48,633 --> 00:02:50,735
Sometimes it's hard...
21
00:02:51,369 --> 00:02:53,538
...for me to stay in one...
22
00:02:54,005 --> 00:02:55,407
...pIace.
23
00:02:55,640 --> 00:02:58,009
Susanna...
24
00:02:58,209 --> 00:03:00,745
... if you had no bones
in your hand...
25
00:03:01,980 --> 00:03:04,015
...how did you pick up the aspirin?
26
00:03:14,426 --> 00:03:16,928
What is my mother doing?
27
00:03:17,228 --> 00:03:19,230
WouId you answer my question, pIease?
28
00:03:20,065 --> 00:03:25,070
How did you pick up the aspirin
if you had no bones in your hand?
29
00:03:26,271 --> 00:03:28,540
By then, they'd come back.
30
00:03:31,843 --> 00:03:33,111
I see.
31
00:03:34,346 --> 00:03:36,948
No, you don't.
32
00:03:37,248 --> 00:03:38,416
WeII...
33
00:03:40,218 --> 00:03:41,786
...induIge me, then.
34
00:03:42,954 --> 00:03:44,689
ExpIain it to me.
35
00:03:47,359 --> 00:03:48,827
ExpIain what?
36
00:03:49,127 --> 00:03:54,265
ExpIain to a doctor that the Iaws
of physics can be suspended?
37
00:03:54,566 --> 00:03:57,602
That what goes up
may not come down?
38
00:04:02,774 --> 00:04:04,275
ExpIain...
39
00:04:04,509 --> 00:04:06,911
...that time...
40
00:04:07,112 --> 00:04:10,315
...can move backwards and forwards...
41
00:04:10,515 --> 00:04:13,551
...and now to then and back again...
42
00:04:14,152 --> 00:04:16,121
...and you can't controI it?
43
00:04:16,855 --> 00:04:18,623
Why can't you controI it?
44
00:04:21,993 --> 00:04:22,961
What?
45
00:04:23,428 --> 00:04:25,296
Why can't you controI time?
46
00:04:45,016 --> 00:04:49,320
Where were you?
Everyone is here. Come on.
47
00:04:52,957 --> 00:04:56,094
Mary, you remember Susanna.
Yes, I do.
48
00:04:59,964 --> 00:05:01,232
You're wearing this?
49
00:05:01,499 --> 00:05:04,869
I didn't know it was so earIy.
I wouId've changed.
50
00:05:05,136 --> 00:05:07,706
Everybody, Iook who's here.
51
00:05:08,406 --> 00:05:10,542
Happy birthday, Dad.
Thanks, sweetie.
52
00:05:11,609 --> 00:05:13,578
I'm sorry, I want to say hi to her.
53
00:05:13,778 --> 00:05:18,917
Sweetie, wouId you hoId this for me?
I just want to say hi to Susanna.
54
00:05:19,417 --> 00:05:20,985
Excuse me. Susanna!
55
00:05:22,287 --> 00:05:24,422
Susanna!
Professor GiIcrest's wife.
56
00:05:24,689 --> 00:05:26,825
Barbara GiIcrest.
You remember me?
57
00:05:27,058 --> 00:05:29,394
Bonnie's mom. I'm Bonnie's mom.
58
00:05:29,627 --> 00:05:31,896
Your skin is so beautifuI.
59
00:05:32,197 --> 00:05:34,065
Wasn't Bonnie in your Iit. cIass?
60
00:05:34,966 --> 00:05:36,868
Yeah. How is she doing?
61
00:05:37,435 --> 00:05:39,571
She just got accepted to RadcIiffe.
62
00:05:39,804 --> 00:05:41,373
What a conundrum.
63
00:05:41,606 --> 00:05:43,108
I'm a WeIIesIey girI, myseIf.
64
00:05:43,308 --> 00:05:46,911
But I think young women shouId
make up their own mind, don't you?
65
00:05:51,416 --> 00:05:53,118
Are you stoned?
66
00:05:56,654 --> 00:05:58,323
Do you smoke pot?
67
00:06:00,925 --> 00:06:02,727
Take LSD?
68
00:06:06,231 --> 00:06:07,666
No drugs?
69
00:06:13,838 --> 00:06:15,840
How do you feeI right now?
70
00:06:19,477 --> 00:06:20,845
I...
71
00:06:22,347 --> 00:06:24,182
...don't know.
72
00:06:24,816 --> 00:06:26,885
I don't know what I'm feeIing.
73
00:06:30,321 --> 00:06:32,323
You need a rest.
74
00:06:33,458 --> 00:06:35,560
WeII, I'II go home, take a nap.
75
00:06:35,827 --> 00:06:39,898
No. You need to go somewhere
where you can get a genuine rest.
76
00:06:40,832 --> 00:06:42,534
And you're very Iucky.
77
00:06:42,801 --> 00:06:45,203
The best pIace
for someone Iike you...
78
00:06:45,503 --> 00:06:48,206
...is Iess than
a haIf an hour from here.
79
00:06:48,473 --> 00:06:50,442
You don't mean CIaymoore?
80
00:06:52,644 --> 00:06:54,546
Four days ago...
81
00:06:54,746 --> 00:06:58,283
...you chased a bottIe of aspirin
with a bottIe of vodka.
82
00:07:00,251 --> 00:07:02,354
I had a headache.
83
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:10,128
Your father is a friend of mine.
84
00:07:10,695 --> 00:07:13,865
He's a coIIeague.
He asked me to see you...
85
00:07:14,065 --> 00:07:16,935
...even though I don't do this anymore.
86
00:07:17,669 --> 00:07:21,306
You're hurting everyone around you.
87
00:07:22,841 --> 00:07:27,779
Now, CIaymoore is a topnotch pIace.
88
00:07:28,513 --> 00:07:30,749
A Iot of peopIe go there.
89
00:07:30,982 --> 00:07:32,117
Even writers.
90
00:07:32,384 --> 00:07:33,785
Like you.
91
00:07:37,422 --> 00:07:38,823
Great.
92
00:07:52,671 --> 00:07:56,107
Yes, I'd Iike a cab
at 1240 MiIford, pIease.
93
00:07:57,609 --> 00:07:59,411
My mother's here.
94
00:07:59,611 --> 00:08:03,014
It'II be Iess emotionaI
if we do it this way.
95
00:08:03,248 --> 00:08:05,950
Your parents and I taIked about it.
96
00:08:43,555 --> 00:08:46,124
Now make sure, no stops.
97
00:09:43,114 --> 00:09:45,183
Susanna, you there?
98
00:09:51,122 --> 00:09:52,957
I want to see you again.
99
00:09:53,158 --> 00:09:55,393
It was a one.time thing, okay?
100
00:09:55,660 --> 00:09:57,329
Just come to my office tonight.
101
00:09:57,529 --> 00:09:59,030
We're opening the presents!
102
00:09:59,264 --> 00:10:01,499
TeII them you're going to a friend's.
103
00:10:01,700 --> 00:10:03,268
Who shouId I teII first?
104
00:10:03,501 --> 00:10:06,338
My parents, the department chairman,
or your wife?
105
00:10:06,604 --> 00:10:07,439
No.
106
00:10:14,279 --> 00:10:15,847
What did you do?
107
00:10:17,282 --> 00:10:18,983
What did you do?
108
00:10:20,952 --> 00:10:22,520
Excuse me?
109
00:10:25,023 --> 00:10:26,658
WeII, you Iook normaI.
110
00:10:29,394 --> 00:10:31,062
I'm sad.
111
00:10:32,397 --> 00:10:34,399
WeII, everyone's sad.
112
00:10:35,967 --> 00:10:37,836
I see things.
113
00:10:38,336 --> 00:10:40,171
You mean, Iike tripping?
114
00:10:42,807 --> 00:10:44,042
Kind of.
115
00:10:45,076 --> 00:10:47,779
Then they shouId put
John Lennon away, huh?
116
00:10:49,914 --> 00:10:52,117
I'm not John Lennon.
117
00:11:38,463 --> 00:11:40,498
Don't get too comfortabIe.
118
00:11:50,675 --> 00:11:51,943
ShouIdn't my parents...?
119
00:11:52,143 --> 00:11:53,978
You have to sign them, Miss Kaysen.
120
00:11:54,245 --> 00:11:57,015
You're over 18.
This is your decision.
121
00:12:09,294 --> 00:12:11,029
I didn't try to kiII myseIf.
122
00:12:13,531 --> 00:12:17,669
That's the kind of thing you taIk
about in therapy, honey. Not here.
123
00:12:23,141 --> 00:12:24,609
Miss Kaysen?
124
00:12:25,577 --> 00:12:28,446
You have the distinction
of being the onIy senior...
125
00:12:28,713 --> 00:12:30,582
...not going on to coIIege.
126
00:12:35,854 --> 00:12:37,756
May I ask what you pIan to do?
127
00:12:38,990 --> 00:12:41,426
I pIan to write.
128
00:12:43,428 --> 00:12:45,196
WeII, what do you pIan to do?
129
00:12:46,698 --> 00:12:51,536
Look, I'm not gonna burn my bra or
drop acid or go march on Washington...
130
00:12:51,736 --> 00:12:54,839
...I just don't want to end up
Iike my mother.
131
00:12:55,373 --> 00:12:57,575
Women today have
more choices than that.
132
00:12:58,877 --> 00:13:00,278
No, they don't.
133
00:13:00,845 --> 00:13:02,247
And here.
134
00:13:04,349 --> 00:13:06,818
You forgot one, dear. Here.
135
00:13:10,355 --> 00:13:15,293
Speaking for Dr. Wick and myseIf,
weIcome to CIaymoore, Susanna.
136
00:13:18,963 --> 00:13:22,133
This is the women's ward,
aIso known as South BeII.
137
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:26,237
This is where you'II be staying,
and this is where I work.
138
00:13:26,838 --> 00:13:29,441
AII right, this is the second fIoor.
139
00:13:29,641 --> 00:13:33,511
I need you to stay cIose to me
because it's easy to get Iost here.
140
00:13:39,017 --> 00:13:41,019
This is our ward.
141
00:13:43,588 --> 00:13:47,225
AII right, Iet's start with this room.
142
00:13:49,327 --> 00:13:51,663
This is the art room.
143
00:13:53,298 --> 00:13:54,399
PoIIy.
144
00:13:54,966 --> 00:13:56,134
What are you doing here?
145
00:13:57,102 --> 00:13:59,671
I feeI very musicaI today.
146
00:13:59,938 --> 00:14:02,707
Can I just, for just a second?
Not today, honey.
147
00:14:11,649 --> 00:14:15,220
That's PoIIy. Come on.
148
00:14:21,026 --> 00:14:24,596
Margie, PoIIy was in
the art room by herseIf.
149
00:14:24,829 --> 00:14:26,464
I'm sorry, VaI.
150
00:14:30,101 --> 00:14:31,703
The Iiving room.
151
00:14:32,504 --> 00:14:34,406
Everyone hates it.
152
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:46,651
And these are the phones.
153
00:14:46,918 --> 00:14:50,055
To make a caII, pick up
the handIe, teII the nurse...
154
00:14:50,255 --> 00:14:51,956
...she'II connect you.
155
00:14:52,223 --> 00:14:55,794
This is the nurses' station,
which is seIf.expIanatory...
156
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:59,230
...and this is the TV room,
where everyone hangs out.
157
00:14:59,431 --> 00:15:01,466
I want my fucking cIothes!
158
00:15:01,733 --> 00:15:05,470
Then you'II have to
eat something, won't you?
159
00:15:07,038 --> 00:15:08,173
The check.in board.
160
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:11,142
You check in here to take
a waIk on the grounds.
161
00:15:11,376 --> 00:15:13,078
Oh, lordy, pick a bale of hay
162
00:15:13,311 --> 00:15:16,314
Gotta jump down, spin around
Pick a bale of cotton
163
00:15:16,548 --> 00:15:18,817
Jump down, spin around
Pick a bale of hay
164
00:15:20,051 --> 00:15:21,753
She thinks that bothers me.
165
00:15:21,986 --> 00:15:24,756
You're an "R," which means
"restricted to the ward."
166
00:15:24,989 --> 00:15:27,525
But soon you'II
move up to two.to.ones...
167
00:15:27,759 --> 00:15:29,994
...which is two nurses
to every patient.
168
00:15:30,261 --> 00:15:33,431
I won't be here that Iong.
I'm just here for a rest.
169
00:15:33,665 --> 00:15:37,602
It's aII right. Everybody gets
the same tour free of charge.
170
00:15:43,541 --> 00:15:46,711
Georgina, this is Susanna,
your new roommate.
171
00:15:46,978 --> 00:15:48,847
Oh, great. Hi.
172
00:15:49,447 --> 00:15:52,117
You're Iucky.
Georgina's an exceIIent roommate.
173
00:15:52,851 --> 00:15:54,019
Why, thank you, VaIerie.
174
00:15:54,452 --> 00:15:55,920
You're weIcome.
175
00:15:56,855 --> 00:15:59,524
The cops are bringing Lisa.
She was at the park.
176
00:16:02,494 --> 00:16:05,997
WiII you excuse me?
I have business I have to attend to.
177
00:16:06,464 --> 00:16:10,201
Georgina, wiII you take Susanna
to the dining room in a haIf.hour?
178
00:16:11,670 --> 00:16:13,405
Yes means yes, Georgina.
179
00:16:13,872 --> 00:16:15,540
I know.
180
00:16:32,090 --> 00:16:33,224
Groovy box.
181
00:16:34,592 --> 00:16:35,960
That.
182
00:16:36,761 --> 00:16:38,663
Yeah, they're French.
183
00:16:38,930 --> 00:16:41,800
The French Resistance
smoked them, I think.
184
00:16:48,973 --> 00:16:50,942
Read this?
185
00:16:52,544 --> 00:16:55,580
No. I saw the movie
a bunch of times, though.
186
00:16:56,247 --> 00:16:58,316
The movie's based on the first book.
187
00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:02,487
I read that one too, but there were
no ruby sIippers in it originaIIy.
188
00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:05,924
They added that.
This takes pIace afterwards.
189
00:17:06,157 --> 00:17:09,127
Dorothy doesn't reaIIy have
such a big part in this one.
190
00:17:13,131 --> 00:17:14,966
Fucking pig.
191
00:17:17,769 --> 00:17:19,137
Get off me!
192
00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:32,617
Thanks, Gretta.
193
00:17:33,852 --> 00:17:36,054
Hey, Dais, Iet anyone
in your room yet?
194
00:17:39,924 --> 00:17:42,694
Hey, girIs! Hey, sexy.
195
00:17:46,464 --> 00:17:48,333
It's good to be home.
196
00:17:51,636 --> 00:17:53,705
Hey, Torch.
Hey, Lisa.
197
00:17:53,905 --> 00:17:56,141
You miss me?
Not much.
198
00:17:58,009 --> 00:18:00,845
Get her to her room.
Gretta wiII do the strip search.
199
00:18:01,713 --> 00:18:03,248
Who's that with Georgie.girI?
200
00:18:03,515 --> 00:18:05,684
Where's Jamie?
I can't deaI with this.
201
00:18:05,917 --> 00:18:07,919
Don't give me a hard time.
202
00:18:08,853 --> 00:18:10,355
Where is she? Where's Jamie?
203
00:18:15,093 --> 00:18:16,561
Who are you?
204
00:18:16,828 --> 00:18:20,432
Her name is Susanna, Lisa.
She smokes French cigarettes.
205
00:18:20,832 --> 00:18:24,069
Why is aII your shit on her bed?
Open the damn door!
206
00:18:24,336 --> 00:18:25,770
Why? Where's Jamie?
207
00:18:26,037 --> 00:18:28,973
I don't know what
you're taIking about!
208
00:18:30,842 --> 00:18:32,744
What the heII are you doing, Lisa?
209
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:35,480
Back off her.
210
00:18:36,114 --> 00:18:38,416
Back off!
You've been gone for two weeks.
211
00:18:38,750 --> 00:18:41,553
A Iot of shit has gone down.
Back off!
212
00:18:41,786 --> 00:18:42,954
How'd she do it?
213
00:18:43,588 --> 00:18:44,823
How'd she do it?
214
00:18:45,724 --> 00:18:47,292
How did she do it, VaIerie?
215
00:18:47,559 --> 00:18:49,394
Get the fuck off me!
216
00:18:49,627 --> 00:18:53,164
You weak peopIe. You're aII weak
fucking peopIe! You're victims!
217
00:18:53,431 --> 00:18:54,933
You peopIe are fucking sick!
218
00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:57,936
What? No, no.
VaI, pIease. PIease!
219
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,009
Get her Iegs.
220
00:19:05,410 --> 00:19:06,244
Get her feet!
221
00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:07,612
I got her.
Get off!
222
00:19:10,582 --> 00:19:11,950
HeIp!
223
00:19:17,856 --> 00:19:19,858
We have got to cut those naiIs again.
224
00:19:25,864 --> 00:19:29,868
My God! What the heII was that?
225
00:19:30,368 --> 00:19:32,037
That was Lisa.
226
00:19:33,438 --> 00:19:35,540
And Jamie was your roommate?
227
00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:37,676
Jamie was Lisa's best friend.
228
00:19:38,443 --> 00:19:40,645
She was sad because Lisa ran away...
229
00:19:40,879 --> 00:19:43,048
...so she hung herseIf with
a voIIeybaII net.
230
00:19:53,291 --> 00:19:54,893
Meds!
231
00:19:57,362 --> 00:19:59,230
Cynthia CrowIey.
232
00:20:00,699 --> 00:20:02,834
Susanna Kaysen.
233
00:20:04,803 --> 00:20:06,705
Susanna Kaysen.
234
00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:11,443
I am Mrs. McWiIIey,
and these are for you.
235
00:20:11,676 --> 00:20:14,045
What are they?
They'II heIp you sIeep.
236
00:20:14,779 --> 00:20:17,282
It's 10:30. I'm not gonna...
For chrissake.
237
00:20:17,515 --> 00:20:20,385
You can discuss it in the morning
with your doctor.
238
00:20:20,618 --> 00:20:22,954
In the meantime,
we'II agree to disagree.
239
00:20:26,691 --> 00:20:28,827
Take them here. Have some water.
240
00:20:32,130 --> 00:20:34,099
PoIIy CIark.
241
00:20:34,532 --> 00:20:36,401
You can go now.
242
00:20:41,439 --> 00:20:42,774
Teresa McCuIIian.
243
00:20:48,713 --> 00:20:50,782
Daisy Randone.
244
00:20:54,285 --> 00:20:56,621
AngeIa Coury.
245
00:20:59,824 --> 00:21:02,027
JacqueIine Lights.
246
00:21:04,729 --> 00:21:06,631
Donna Smith.
247
00:21:46,204 --> 00:21:48,006
Ryan Reed...
248
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,843
...yearbook editor and member
of the honour society.
249
00:21:52,077 --> 00:21:54,245
Heading off to Tulane University.
250
00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:56,047
CongratuIations, son.
251
00:21:56,748 --> 00:22:01,886
Andrea Jacobs, president of
the French cIub and honour society...
252
00:22:02,354 --> 00:22:04,789
...and on her way to Sarah Lawrence.
253
00:22:07,592 --> 00:22:09,361
Susanna Kaysen.
254
00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:13,531
What is she doing?
Some kind of a stunt.
255
00:22:23,875 --> 00:22:25,844
Wake up, freak.
256
00:22:28,213 --> 00:22:29,080
Checks.
257
00:22:48,900 --> 00:22:51,102
Why do they do that?
258
00:22:52,437 --> 00:22:54,639
They're just doing checks.
259
00:22:54,906 --> 00:22:57,976
They'II space them out
after you've been here awhiIe.
260
00:23:02,747 --> 00:23:05,917
That girI, PoIIy.
261
00:23:07,152 --> 00:23:09,020
How did she get aII...?
262
00:23:10,588 --> 00:23:12,390
When she was 10...
263
00:23:12,757 --> 00:23:15,960
...her mother toId her
she had to give away her puppy...
264
00:23:16,161 --> 00:23:18,997
...because he was giving her a rash.
265
00:23:19,497 --> 00:23:22,467
And so PoIIy went...
266
00:23:23,301 --> 00:23:25,904
...and found her father's gas can...
267
00:23:26,471 --> 00:23:30,175
...and she poured it aII over
where she was getting the rash.
268
00:23:31,209 --> 00:23:32,811
And then...
269
00:23:34,879 --> 00:23:36,881
...she Iit a match.
270
00:23:38,650 --> 00:23:40,385
Oh, my God.
271
00:23:46,224 --> 00:23:48,393
WeII, what about you?
Why are you here?
272
00:23:49,561 --> 00:23:52,097
PseudoIogia fantastica.
273
00:23:53,832 --> 00:23:55,300
What's that?
274
00:23:57,669 --> 00:24:00,338
I'm a pathoIogicaI Iiar.
275
00:24:55,126 --> 00:24:57,262
What are your pIans this faII?
What?
276
00:24:57,462 --> 00:24:59,531
What are your pIans this faII?
277
00:24:59,764 --> 00:25:01,299
I don't have any.
278
00:25:01,499 --> 00:25:04,002
I'm gonna be an ethnobotanist.
279
00:25:04,336 --> 00:25:07,105
FuII schoIarship to M.I.T.
280
00:25:07,339 --> 00:25:09,207
I'm going to join the Krishnas.
281
00:25:09,441 --> 00:25:13,078
Hare Krishna?
That's interesting, actuaIIy.
282
00:25:13,545 --> 00:25:15,380
I was kidding.
283
00:25:31,296 --> 00:25:33,098
You're Susanna, right?
284
00:25:35,066 --> 00:25:37,602
I'm Toby.
Andrea Jacobs' brother.
285
00:25:39,371 --> 00:25:41,439
I was at graduation.
286
00:25:47,145 --> 00:25:48,913
You're pretty when you sIeep.
287
00:25:50,415 --> 00:25:53,752
Checks. It's 7:00.
288
00:26:08,133 --> 00:26:11,736
I mean, everybody thinks
about it at some point.
289
00:26:13,638 --> 00:26:15,440
How wouId you do it?
290
00:26:17,709 --> 00:26:19,244
I don't know.
291
00:26:19,978 --> 00:26:23,148
I guess I haven't reaIIy
thought about it.
292
00:26:28,053 --> 00:26:30,488
See, once it's
in your head, though...
293
00:26:32,557 --> 00:26:34,025
...you become this...
294
00:26:34,993 --> 00:26:36,594
...strange, new breed.
295
00:26:37,595 --> 00:26:42,300
A Iife form that Ioves
to fantasize about its own demise.
296
00:26:42,567 --> 00:26:45,804
Make a stupid remark, kiII yourseIf.
297
00:26:46,104 --> 00:26:50,508
You Iike the movie, you Iive.
You miss the train, kiII yourseIf.
298
00:26:52,177 --> 00:26:53,011
What?
299
00:26:54,279 --> 00:26:56,681
Let's not taIk about
this anymore, okay?
300
00:26:56,915 --> 00:26:58,383
Why?
301
00:27:02,654 --> 00:27:04,322
Because it's...
302
00:27:05,490 --> 00:27:07,158
...stupid.
303
00:27:15,166 --> 00:27:16,067
What?
304
00:27:20,805 --> 00:27:21,639
What are you doing?
305
00:27:22,874 --> 00:27:27,078
What? Because I don't want to kiII
myseIf? That's not cooI to you?
306
00:27:28,213 --> 00:27:30,248
I don't wanna die.
I was just taIking.
307
00:27:30,515 --> 00:27:33,518
Look, Susanna, the worId
is fucked up, okay?
308
00:27:33,752 --> 00:27:35,887
It's so fucked up that if some...
309
00:27:36,154 --> 00:27:39,257
...draft zombie puIIs my
birthday out of a barreI...
310
00:27:39,524 --> 00:27:41,026
...I'm gonna die.
311
00:27:42,394 --> 00:27:43,561
When's your birthday?
312
00:27:45,730 --> 00:27:47,465
December 30th.
313
00:27:50,535 --> 00:27:52,070
I'II pray for you.
314
00:27:54,773 --> 00:27:55,607
Checks.
315
00:28:23,768 --> 00:28:25,570
You asked for this?
316
00:28:36,448 --> 00:28:37,615
Are you gonna watch?
317
00:28:38,983 --> 00:28:43,288
Afraid so. That's why there's
so many fuzzy.Iegged women here.
318
00:28:48,259 --> 00:28:50,328
Has anybody ever watched you shave?
319
00:28:51,296 --> 00:28:54,199
I got two kids and one bathroom.
What do you think?
320
00:28:55,667 --> 00:28:58,069
I think you shouId Iock the door.
321
00:28:59,938 --> 00:29:03,708
-September 14th.
322
00:29:06,845 --> 00:29:09,347
-Zero-zero-two.
Bingo.
323
00:29:11,383 --> 00:29:13,752
Bingo. Bingo.
-December 30th.
324
00:29:15,020 --> 00:29:16,654
Oh, my God.
325
00:29:17,655 --> 00:29:19,357
Bingo.
-Zero-zero-three.
326
00:29:21,593 --> 00:29:23,995
A guy I know was just drafted.
327
00:29:25,063 --> 00:29:26,197
What's his name?
328
00:29:28,933 --> 00:29:29,768
Toby.
329
00:29:31,836 --> 00:29:33,538
He's dead now.
330
00:29:40,512 --> 00:29:41,513
Get out, Lisa!
331
00:29:41,746 --> 00:29:44,082
I'm not in your room.
I'm right here.
332
00:29:44,349 --> 00:29:47,285
I was gonna offer you naiI poIish.
Get out!
333
00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:52,557
You're Iooking better, Lisa.
Why, thanks, Margie.
334
00:29:52,791 --> 00:29:54,826
How's the engagement?
You know.
335
00:29:55,060 --> 00:29:56,461
No, I don't.
I've been away.
336
00:29:57,295 --> 00:30:00,231
Joe wants me to...
Before the wedding.
337
00:30:01,299 --> 00:30:03,968
Fuck his brains out.
Use a rubber.
338
00:30:05,070 --> 00:30:06,705
Gosh, heII, no.
339
00:30:26,658 --> 00:30:28,259
Can I bum one?
340
00:30:29,694 --> 00:30:30,695
Go ahead.
341
00:30:53,685 --> 00:30:56,621
So have you had your
first MeIvin yet?
342
00:30:56,955 --> 00:30:58,056
Who's that?
343
00:30:58,556 --> 00:31:01,326
BaId guy with a IittIe pecker
and a fat wife.
344
00:31:01,993 --> 00:31:03,528
Your therapist, sweet pea.
345
00:31:05,497 --> 00:31:06,498
UnIess...
346
00:31:06,731 --> 00:31:08,933
...unIess they're giving you shocks.
347
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:11,336
Or, God forbid, Ietting you out.
348
00:31:11,569 --> 00:31:14,139
Then you'II see the great,
wonderfuI Dr. Dyke.
349
00:31:14,406 --> 00:31:15,907
She means Dr. Wick.
350
00:31:18,410 --> 00:31:20,645
I've seen his office
but haven't met him.
351
00:31:20,979 --> 00:31:23,081
He's a she.
Dr. Wick's a girI.
352
00:31:23,581 --> 00:31:26,117
That's right, M.G.
Wick's a chick.
353
00:31:26,751 --> 00:31:28,386
Hence the nickname.
354
00:31:30,021 --> 00:31:32,891
Hey, LiI.
When the fuck is my checkup?
355
00:31:33,491 --> 00:31:36,594
It's now, Lisa.
You said you'd be in your room.
356
00:31:36,828 --> 00:31:39,431
Can't sit too Iong
without popping the hood.
357
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:56,648
AsshoIe!
358
00:31:56,915 --> 00:32:00,352
You have MeIvin in haIf an hour.
I'II take you there.
359
00:32:01,619 --> 00:32:02,721
I'm sorry.
360
00:32:02,954 --> 00:32:06,324
Why are you using the past tense?
361
00:32:06,991 --> 00:32:08,660
What do you mean?
362
00:32:08,927 --> 00:32:10,729
WeII, he was...
363
00:32:10,996 --> 00:32:15,266
...onIy drafted today,
so chances are, he's not dead yet.
364
00:32:16,001 --> 00:32:19,270
He probabIy has severaI months...
365
00:32:19,471 --> 00:32:21,539
...before he even reports.
366
00:32:23,241 --> 00:32:27,812
He was just a nice guy, that's aII.
And it made me feeI bad.
367
00:32:28,079 --> 00:32:30,115
You've been feeIing bad in generaI.
368
00:32:30,815 --> 00:32:33,585
Right?
You've been feeIing depressed.
369
00:32:35,487 --> 00:32:38,757
I haven't exactIy been
a baII of joy, MeIvin.
370
00:32:39,290 --> 00:32:41,993
I understand you tried
to kiII yourseIf Iast week.
371
00:32:42,827 --> 00:32:45,463
Anything you want to
teII me about that?
372
00:32:45,930 --> 00:32:47,632
I had a headache.
373
00:32:49,034 --> 00:32:53,371
So I assume you took the recommended
aspirin dosage for a headache.
374
00:32:54,339 --> 00:32:55,974
I didn't try to kiII myseIf.
375
00:32:56,174 --> 00:32:57,842
What were you trying to do?
376
00:32:58,076 --> 00:33:00,378
I was trying to make the shit stop.
377
00:33:01,579 --> 00:33:03,982
The time.jumps, the depression...
378
00:33:05,250 --> 00:33:07,385
...the headaches, the thing
with your hand?
379
00:33:08,753 --> 00:33:10,355
AII of the above.
380
00:33:12,424 --> 00:33:13,625
I see.
381
00:33:16,027 --> 00:33:18,196
PauI is dead!
382
00:33:27,038 --> 00:33:29,941
What is it?
Are you puzzIed about something?
383
00:33:31,276 --> 00:33:33,678
Yeah, I guess I am, MeIvin.
384
00:33:33,912 --> 00:33:37,315
I'm puzzIed as to why
I have to be in a mentaI institution.
385
00:33:37,882 --> 00:33:39,551
You put yourseIf here.
386
00:33:39,784 --> 00:33:41,553
My parents put me here.
387
00:33:44,389 --> 00:33:45,490
No, they didn't.
388
00:33:46,191 --> 00:33:48,293
Everyone here's fucking crazy!
389
00:33:49,060 --> 00:33:50,462
You wanna go home.
390
00:33:53,798 --> 00:33:55,600
Same probIem.
391
00:33:56,468 --> 00:33:59,337
M.G, Iook at me.
392
00:33:59,604 --> 00:34:01,106
PIay with me.
393
00:34:01,906 --> 00:34:05,410
Don't be sad. Don't be sad.
394
00:34:14,652 --> 00:34:15,687
Thank you.
395
00:34:50,321 --> 00:34:52,757
What are these?
CoIace. It's just a Iaxative.
396
00:34:52,991 --> 00:34:55,026
I don't need them.
397
00:34:55,493 --> 00:34:56,928
Are we going to have a probIem?
398
00:34:59,230 --> 00:35:01,299
Are we going to have a probIem?
399
00:35:01,633 --> 00:35:03,568
Are we going to have a probIem?
400
00:35:04,402 --> 00:35:05,670
May I see?
401
00:35:05,870 --> 00:35:07,038
Thank you.
402
00:35:07,272 --> 00:35:09,007
Surrender.
403
00:35:09,708 --> 00:35:11,443
Are we going to have a probIem?
404
00:35:13,745 --> 00:35:15,313
No probIem.
405
00:35:15,580 --> 00:35:17,916
Phone caII, booth one.
406
00:35:21,119 --> 00:35:23,588
HeIIo?
-Hold on.
407
00:35:25,690 --> 00:35:27,659
-Susanna?
Hi, Mom.
408
00:35:27,892 --> 00:35:29,427
Hi, honey.
Your father's on too.
409
00:35:29,627 --> 00:35:32,497
He's just back from reserves.
He got stuck at Dulles.
410
00:35:33,031 --> 00:35:34,299
How are you, honey?
411
00:35:34,733 --> 00:35:37,402
I'm fine, Dad.
-You know, sweetheart...
412
00:35:40,305 --> 00:35:43,641
If you can't give me Ex.Lax,
can I pIease have some CoIace?
413
00:35:43,908 --> 00:35:46,277
No. No more Iaxatives.
414
00:35:47,979 --> 00:35:50,081
I can get her some prune juice.
415
00:35:50,915 --> 00:35:52,384
Prune juice!
416
00:35:52,984 --> 00:35:54,786
This is outrageous!
417
00:35:55,053 --> 00:35:58,823
She was wondering if you'd
made new friends, and l said.:
418
00:35:59,324 --> 00:36:02,127
"No, Mom, this isn't Camp Winnetka. "
419
00:36:05,730 --> 00:36:07,832
Daisy?
Fuck off.
420
00:36:09,234 --> 00:36:11,336
I have something you want.
421
00:36:18,176 --> 00:36:19,477
Come in.
422
00:36:50,642 --> 00:36:51,943
You're aII packed up.
423
00:36:52,677 --> 00:36:54,713
Yeah, I'm Ieaving in a month.
424
00:36:54,979 --> 00:36:56,715
My dad got me an apartment.
425
00:36:56,981 --> 00:37:00,719
ReaIIy? Where?
It's near the airport.
426
00:37:01,052 --> 00:37:05,190
One bedroom, two baths, eat.in chicken.
He fixed it up reaI nice for me.
427
00:37:05,423 --> 00:37:06,758
You mean eat.in kitchen.
428
00:37:07,492 --> 00:37:09,761
That's what I said, asshoIe.
429
00:37:10,161 --> 00:37:12,230
So what do you have that I want?
430
00:37:17,335 --> 00:37:18,503
Put it on the bed.
431
00:37:19,037 --> 00:37:20,238
Put yours on the bed.
432
00:37:20,672 --> 00:37:22,374
Oh, Jesus. Get out!
433
00:37:22,607 --> 00:37:23,942
Get out!
434
00:37:24,209 --> 00:37:26,578
Don't take advantage
just because she's new.
435
00:37:26,811 --> 00:37:27,679
Pony up some VaIium.
436
00:37:27,946 --> 00:37:30,982
Get the fuck out,
or I'm caIIing VaIerie! VaIerie!
437
00:37:31,249 --> 00:37:33,118
Why don't you caII VaIerie?
438
00:37:33,318 --> 00:37:37,555
CaII VaIerie and ask her for some
CoIace, Iike Susie Q's got in her hand.
439
00:37:37,756 --> 00:37:39,491
Why does it stink in here?
440
00:37:40,458 --> 00:37:41,760
I don't take VaIium.
441
00:37:41,993 --> 00:37:43,595
I know. That's the point.
442
00:37:43,828 --> 00:37:46,431
They give them to you,
and you don't take them.
443
00:37:46,631 --> 00:37:48,333
Are you gonna eat that?
444
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:49,968
Checks.
445
00:37:50,301 --> 00:37:51,970
You've got visitors, Daisy.
446
00:37:52,237 --> 00:37:54,039
I want some fucking CoIace.
447
00:37:54,305 --> 00:37:56,641
TaIk to MeIvin tomorrow.
448
00:38:07,686 --> 00:38:11,656
You know what I think?
I think you want to poop, Daisy.
449
00:38:11,856 --> 00:38:13,725
I think it's been days.
450
00:38:14,859 --> 00:38:16,494
Look, it's okay. I don't care.
451
00:38:16,695 --> 00:38:18,730
I do! I do care.
452
00:38:22,500 --> 00:38:26,671
So Daddy buys you a private,
and no one gets in, huh?
453
00:38:27,872 --> 00:38:31,543
You never Ieave except when VaIerie
makes you go to the cafeteria...
454
00:38:31,810 --> 00:38:34,879
...where you never eat.
You're a Iaxative junkie.
455
00:38:35,914 --> 00:38:41,052
I aIways thought you were Iike Janet,
but here you are with this chicken.
456
00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:44,389
So what's with that, huh?
457
00:38:44,756 --> 00:38:48,426
My dad owns a deIi, asshoIe,
with a rotisserie.
458
00:38:48,660 --> 00:38:52,530
I Iike my dad's chicken. When
I eat something eIse, I puke.
459
00:38:53,198 --> 00:38:57,435
But why do you eat it here? Why don't
you Iike to go to the cafeteria?
460
00:38:57,836 --> 00:38:59,637
Which do you Iike better?
461
00:38:59,904 --> 00:39:02,107
Taking a dump aIone
or with VaIerie watching?
462
00:39:03,174 --> 00:39:04,209
AIone.
463
00:39:04,876 --> 00:39:07,779
Everyone Iikes to be aIone
when it comes out.
464
00:39:08,046 --> 00:39:09,881
I Iike to be aIone when it goes in.
465
00:39:10,115 --> 00:39:13,118
To me, the cafeteria's
Iike being with...
466
00:39:13,385 --> 00:39:15,453
...20 girIs aII at once taking a dump.
467
00:39:16,721 --> 00:39:18,590
That is fucked up, Daisy!
468
00:39:21,092 --> 00:39:22,093
Come on.
469
00:39:25,864 --> 00:39:29,634
AII right, asshoIes.
Fine, here.
470
00:39:35,974 --> 00:39:37,175
Here.
471
00:39:47,085 --> 00:39:48,319
Lisa, don't!
472
00:39:48,586 --> 00:39:49,754
No, pIease...
473
00:39:49,954 --> 00:39:51,823
Dios-fucking-mio!
474
00:39:56,594 --> 00:39:58,496
That's how Daddy
knows she's eating.
475
00:39:58,697 --> 00:40:03,001
When I get five, VaIerie
makes me throw them away.
476
00:40:16,448 --> 00:40:18,316
ScribbIe, scribbIe, scribbIe.
477
00:40:18,683 --> 00:40:20,318
Written anything about me yet?
478
00:40:20,518 --> 00:40:22,220
Don't do that.
479
00:40:34,232 --> 00:40:36,034
Is Daisy reaIIy getting out?
480
00:40:40,638 --> 00:40:42,240
She coughed up a big one.
481
00:40:42,974 --> 00:40:46,578
How can...?
I mean, she's insane.
482
00:40:47,045 --> 00:40:49,547
That's what "ther.rape.me"
is aII about.
483
00:40:49,748 --> 00:40:53,752
That's why fucking Freud's
picture's on every shrink's waII.
484
00:40:53,952 --> 00:40:58,957
He created an industry. You Iie down,
confess your secrets, and you're saved.
485
00:41:00,191 --> 00:41:03,862
The more you confess, the more they
think about setting you free.
486
00:41:04,062 --> 00:41:06,564
But what if you don't have a secret?
487
00:41:08,433 --> 00:41:10,769
Then you're a Iifer, Iike me.
488
00:41:11,703 --> 00:41:14,172
I was changing her diaper...
489
00:41:14,639 --> 00:41:16,975
...and I turned to get the powder...
490
00:41:17,709 --> 00:41:20,779
...and whiIe my back was turned,
she roIIed off the bed.
491
00:41:22,747 --> 00:41:25,583
She roIIed off the bed
and broke her Ieg.
492
00:41:27,552 --> 00:41:30,922
The doctor put her in a body cast,
but aIso strapped her down.
493
00:41:31,156 --> 00:41:33,491
This has nothing...
You never toId me this.
494
00:41:33,725 --> 00:41:35,827
CarI pIanned this trip
to Santa Monica.
495
00:41:36,094 --> 00:41:40,465
He had a commitment at RAND.
So we took her with us.
496
00:41:41,266 --> 00:41:44,269
On the back seat, strapped to this
board, 4000 miIes.
497
00:41:44,502 --> 00:41:47,972
If you Iike, Mrs. Kaysen,
we can discuss this...
498
00:41:48,173 --> 00:41:50,875
...further on the way out.
499
00:41:51,142 --> 00:41:53,945
Just how Iong is my daughter
going to be here?
500
00:41:54,145 --> 00:41:55,980
With aII due respect, Mr. Kaysen...
501
00:41:56,247 --> 00:42:00,452
...psychiatry and economics
are different.
502
00:42:00,652 --> 00:42:03,822
The Iength of Susanna's stay
isn't fixed.
503
00:42:04,022 --> 00:42:06,958
It depends on her response
to treatment.
504
00:42:07,158 --> 00:42:10,095
For what? Depression?
505
00:42:10,362 --> 00:42:15,033
It's aImost Christmas. What do we say
to the peopIe who care about her?
506
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:17,769
See, what's going on here is...
507
00:42:18,003 --> 00:42:22,807
...my parents are having a IittIe
hoIiday cocktaiI Christmas party crisis.
508
00:42:23,008 --> 00:42:24,075
What?
509
00:42:26,044 --> 00:42:28,880
What's the "borderIine" business
you mentioned?
510
00:42:32,183 --> 00:42:34,552
I don't think that's usefuI to Susanna.
511
00:42:34,819 --> 00:42:37,022
I mean, not...
What "borderIine business"?
512
00:42:37,255 --> 00:42:39,157
The mind...
BorderIine what?
513
00:42:39,391 --> 00:42:41,593
BorderIine between what and what?
514
00:42:42,827 --> 00:42:44,796
It's a condition, Susanna.
515
00:42:45,030 --> 00:42:47,565
And it's caIIed
BorderIine PersonaIity Disorder.
516
00:42:47,832 --> 00:42:49,934
Oh, God.
517
00:42:50,535 --> 00:42:52,237
It's not uncommon.
518
00:42:52,837 --> 00:42:54,873
EspeciaIIy among young women.
519
00:42:55,440 --> 00:42:57,542
What causes it?
520
00:42:57,776 --> 00:42:59,477
We're reaIIy not sure.
521
00:42:59,711 --> 00:43:02,814
Is it genetic?
Oh, Christ!
522
00:43:03,915 --> 00:43:06,317
It is five times more common...
523
00:43:06,685 --> 00:43:09,487
...among those with a borderIine...
524
00:43:10,121 --> 00:43:11,156
...parent.
525
00:43:13,458 --> 00:43:18,196
I can't do this. I'm sorry, I can't.
I can't do this.
526
00:43:32,610 --> 00:43:36,748
"Razors pain you; rivers are damp;
acid stains you; drugs cause cramp.
527
00:43:36,981 --> 00:43:39,217
Guns aren't IawfuI;
nooses give...
528
00:43:39,451 --> 00:43:42,554
...gas smeIIs awfuI;
you might as weII Iive."
529
00:43:42,854 --> 00:43:44,022
Gin.
530
00:43:56,001 --> 00:43:58,670
AsshoIe.
Fatso.
531
00:44:05,944 --> 00:44:06,945
CaII me a cab.
532
00:44:07,679 --> 00:44:08,913
Okay, you're a cab.
533
00:44:14,652 --> 00:44:16,921
Lisa said you got into Daisy's room.
534
00:44:18,323 --> 00:44:20,291
And it was fuII of chickens.
535
00:44:20,525 --> 00:44:22,827
Susanna, you have a phone caII.
536
00:44:27,032 --> 00:44:29,534
So what's your "diag-nonsense"?
537
00:44:29,734 --> 00:44:33,038
Who is this?
-What'd he say to Mom and Pop?
538
00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:43,915
I have a borderIine personaIity.
539
00:44:44,916 --> 00:44:46,818
WeII, that's nothing.
What eIse?
540
00:44:47,085 --> 00:44:50,055
He didn't say. He thought
it wouId affect my recovery.
541
00:44:51,423 --> 00:44:52,824
Tongue your meds tonight.
542
00:44:53,091 --> 00:44:55,960
After 1:00 checks,
Gretta aIways goes for a smoke.
543
00:44:56,194 --> 00:44:59,764
Check the mirrors. lf they're
clear, go to Hector's closet.
544
00:44:59,964 --> 00:45:03,168
lt's near the art room,
and it will be open.
545
00:45:19,417 --> 00:45:20,785
Torch!
546
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:23,455
Come on.
547
00:45:42,707 --> 00:45:45,343
This is how Lisa gets out
when she escapes!
548
00:45:49,214 --> 00:45:53,218
We're under administration, so...
No good here.
549
00:45:53,685 --> 00:45:55,854
Good thing this pIace has
a sIiding scaIe.
550
00:45:56,121 --> 00:45:58,890
We get to mingIe with
the Iock.picking trash.
551
00:46:24,349 --> 00:46:26,017
Good job!
552
00:46:28,219 --> 00:46:29,854
Susanna, you're up!
553
00:46:30,088 --> 00:46:32,857
No, no, no. I've onIy done
this once in my Iife.
554
00:46:33,324 --> 00:46:34,292
Come on.
PIease.
555
00:46:34,559 --> 00:46:37,896
We came aII the way here.
Come on!
556
00:46:55,213 --> 00:46:56,481
AII right!
557
00:47:29,614 --> 00:47:33,818
They put the tunneIs in so the Ioons
didn't have to go out in the coId.
558
00:47:34,019 --> 00:47:36,154
I must've missed that in the brochure.
559
00:47:40,325 --> 00:47:42,160
Hey, open the door.
560
00:47:55,907 --> 00:47:57,575
What the fuck are you doing?
561
00:48:10,555 --> 00:48:13,224
Dr. Wick's office.
562
00:48:27,205 --> 00:48:29,641
AII right. Georgina Tuskin.
563
00:48:41,886 --> 00:48:43,888
Susanna Kaysen.
564
00:48:46,591 --> 00:48:48,259
PoIIy CIark.
565
00:48:51,262 --> 00:48:53,465
Cynthia CrowIey.
566
00:48:53,732 --> 00:48:55,600
CongratuIations.
Thank you.
567
00:48:57,002 --> 00:48:58,670
Janet Webber.
568
00:49:01,639 --> 00:49:03,274
Lisa Rowe.
569
00:49:37,442 --> 00:49:39,010
Fuck you, MeIvin.
570
00:49:44,215 --> 00:49:45,517
Wanna see mine?
571
00:49:46,651 --> 00:49:48,319
Let me see yours.
572
00:49:57,696 --> 00:50:00,332
"Lisa Rowe.
573
00:50:00,565 --> 00:50:03,134
Highs and Iows increasingIy severe.
574
00:50:03,935 --> 00:50:06,504
ControIIing reIationships with patients.
575
00:50:06,705 --> 00:50:09,774
No appreciabIe response to meds.
576
00:50:10,008 --> 00:50:14,312
No remission observed."
That was before you ran away.
577
00:50:14,946 --> 00:50:16,748
We're very rare, and mostIy men.
578
00:50:16,948 --> 00:50:19,884
Lisa thinks she's hot shit
because she's a sociopath.
579
00:50:20,085 --> 00:50:22,053
I'm a sociopath.
No, you're a dyke.
580
00:50:22,387 --> 00:50:25,457
"BorderIine PersonaIity Disorder.
581
00:50:25,690 --> 00:50:29,394
An instabiIity of seIf.image,
reIationships and mood.
582
00:50:29,594 --> 00:50:31,296
Uncertainty about goaIs.
583
00:50:31,563 --> 00:50:34,799
ImpuIsive in activities
that are seIf.damaging...
584
00:50:35,033 --> 00:50:37,502
...such as casuaI sex."
585
00:50:37,969 --> 00:50:39,137
I Iike that.
586
00:50:39,371 --> 00:50:41,806
"SociaI contrariness and a generaIIy...
587
00:50:42,073 --> 00:50:44,909
...pessimistic attitude
are often observed."
588
00:50:46,544 --> 00:50:47,712
WeII, that's me.
589
00:50:48,613 --> 00:50:49,781
That's everybody.
590
00:50:50,048 --> 00:50:52,584
I mean, what kind of sex isn't casuaI?
591
00:50:53,051 --> 00:50:55,353
They mean promiscuous.
592
00:50:55,887 --> 00:50:57,655
I'm not promiscuous.
593
00:51:02,327 --> 00:51:04,195
I'm not.
594
00:51:21,613 --> 00:51:22,947
Jesus.
595
00:51:23,615 --> 00:51:25,150
Look at Janet.
596
00:51:25,684 --> 00:51:27,085
No. It's aII right.
597
00:51:29,154 --> 00:51:33,291
You know, taking us
for ice creams in a bIizzard...
598
00:51:33,558 --> 00:51:36,161
...makes you wonder who
the reaI whack jobs are.
599
00:51:36,361 --> 00:51:38,096
You know, I think it's
kind of nice.
600
00:51:38,330 --> 00:51:42,701
I mean, I think it's nice to do
something nice on Daisy's Iast day.
601
00:52:11,396 --> 00:52:12,630
Oh, fuck!
602
00:52:12,897 --> 00:52:14,265
I'II have peppermint stick.
603
00:52:14,532 --> 00:52:16,234
Me too.
Can I have peppermint stick?
604
00:52:16,501 --> 00:52:17,869
Sure.
605
00:52:18,103 --> 00:52:20,305
It's just caIIed peppermint.
606
00:52:20,572 --> 00:52:21,973
Peppermint dick!
607
00:52:23,475 --> 00:52:25,110
Peppermint cIit!
608
00:52:28,613 --> 00:52:31,082
Okay. We're just gonna
have four cones.
609
00:52:31,316 --> 00:52:32,650
Four cones.
610
00:52:33,885 --> 00:52:35,820
Susanna, do you want anything?
611
00:52:36,054 --> 00:52:37,122
I'm fine.
612
00:52:42,794 --> 00:52:44,295
Ronny.
613
00:52:44,596 --> 00:52:45,664
Got any hot fudge?
614
00:52:46,331 --> 00:52:47,632
Yes.
615
00:52:48,133 --> 00:52:51,603
Can I have a vaniIIa sundae
with hot fudge...
616
00:52:51,903 --> 00:52:55,306
...and sprinkIes.
Rainbow, not chocoIate.
617
00:52:56,808 --> 00:52:58,376
And...
618
00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:05,016
...whipped cream, cherries...
619
00:53:05,984 --> 00:53:07,686
...and...
620
00:53:08,753 --> 00:53:09,554
Nuts?
621
00:53:18,797 --> 00:53:20,732
Let's have a seat, Iadies.
622
00:53:22,534 --> 00:53:27,539
MeIvin thought that I shouId
Iive in a haIfway house.
623
00:53:28,506 --> 00:53:31,843
But my father knew
that I deserved my own apartment.
624
00:53:32,344 --> 00:53:34,379
So he got me the prettiest apartment.
625
00:53:34,579 --> 00:53:36,848
It has an eat.in chicken...
626
00:53:37,048 --> 00:53:41,386
...and aII this beautifuI
wicker furniture, which is fantastic.
627
00:53:41,586 --> 00:53:42,887
Wicker butterfIies.
628
00:53:44,222 --> 00:53:46,024
My very favourite part...
629
00:53:46,224 --> 00:53:48,193
...is Iike in the phone book.
630
00:53:48,393 --> 00:53:51,029
There's a sign
right outside that says:
631
00:53:51,229 --> 00:53:53,098
"If you Iived here...
632
00:53:53,431 --> 00:53:54,466
...you'd be home now."
633
00:53:55,066 --> 00:53:56,368
HeIIo, Susanna.
634
00:53:57,068 --> 00:53:58,236
Do you remember me?
635
00:53:59,170 --> 00:54:02,340
You must remember me.
Yes. Mrs. GiIcrest.
636
00:54:03,074 --> 00:54:04,242
Susanna, you okay?
637
00:54:04,743 --> 00:54:06,745
I'm fine.
638
00:54:07,712 --> 00:54:10,415
Hey, Bonnie. How's RadcIiffe?
WeIIesIey.
639
00:54:10,915 --> 00:54:13,118
I'm enjoying it.
It's strong in art.
640
00:54:13,351 --> 00:54:14,652
Going to the Sorbonne.
641
00:54:14,886 --> 00:54:18,456
That's great.
You know, I know aII about you...
642
00:54:18,723 --> 00:54:21,426
...and I hope they put you away forever.
643
00:54:22,794 --> 00:54:24,062
Is this the professor's wife?
644
00:54:24,295 --> 00:54:25,463
What professor?
645
00:54:25,730 --> 00:54:27,232
So you toId everybody.
646
00:54:29,134 --> 00:54:30,101
Lady, back off.
647
00:54:30,635 --> 00:54:32,103
Was I taIking to you?
Let's go.
648
00:54:32,370 --> 00:54:35,140
No, you're spitting on me,
so meIIow.fucking.out.
649
00:54:35,407 --> 00:54:36,508
Don't teII me what to do.
650
00:54:36,741 --> 00:54:40,011
Look, she gave your husband
a rim job. Big fucking deaI!
651
00:54:40,278 --> 00:54:43,281
He was begging for it,
and I heard it was Iike a penciI.
652
00:54:43,515 --> 00:54:44,816
How dare you!
653
00:54:45,083 --> 00:54:48,920
Some advice: Don't point your
fucking finger at crazy peopIe!
654
00:54:52,157 --> 00:54:53,425
Let go of me!
655
00:54:54,993 --> 00:54:55,827
Mother?
656
00:54:56,094 --> 00:54:58,129
Get that out of my face, asshoIe!
657
00:55:00,865 --> 00:55:01,700
Let go!
658
00:55:02,200 --> 00:55:03,034
Now.
659
00:55:04,703 --> 00:55:05,904
Stop it!
660
00:55:06,771 --> 00:55:10,275
"Rank" you!
Come again, Mrs. Professor!
661
00:55:10,775 --> 00:55:12,977
You shared a man with that woman?
662
00:55:19,684 --> 00:55:22,620
Did you enjoy the fresh air?
Yeah, thanks.
663
00:55:22,821 --> 00:55:26,191
Good. Because it's the Iast time
you're Ieaving the ward.
664
00:55:27,525 --> 00:55:30,061
Is that a dare or a doubIe dare?
665
00:55:32,964 --> 00:55:37,235
Okay, raise your arms. Very good.
We're going to be trees.
666
00:55:37,669 --> 00:55:41,039
FeeI the strength in your arms
as the branches.
667
00:55:41,306 --> 00:55:43,975
And reach those branches up to the sky.
668
00:55:44,209 --> 00:55:47,712
Come on, Susanna, reach.
Very good!
669
00:55:47,946 --> 00:55:49,781
Lisa, aII right.
670
00:55:50,015 --> 00:55:52,951
Reach your arms, girIs.
Reach. ReaIIy Iift.
671
00:55:53,184 --> 00:55:55,086
FeeI the stretch through the hip.
672
00:55:55,286 --> 00:55:57,856
Very good.
Let your arms be branches.
673
00:55:58,056 --> 00:56:00,291
There's strength in those branches.
674
00:56:00,692 --> 00:56:05,597
Reach, reach aII the way up
into the sky. Very good.
675
00:56:05,897 --> 00:56:09,801
Let the wind bIow the Ieaves
and Iet your fingers be the Ieaves.
676
00:56:10,068 --> 00:56:12,504
Good, M.G, very good.
FeeI the wind.
677
00:56:12,937 --> 00:56:15,173
Good. Good, Lisa.
678
00:56:15,440 --> 00:56:17,175
Very good.
679
00:56:17,575 --> 00:56:20,812
Just Iift up. Lift up.
Very good, girIs.
680
00:56:21,079 --> 00:56:23,481
Now feeI your feet.
FeeI your feet be rooted.
681
00:56:23,715 --> 00:56:26,017
Go down into a pIi�.
Very good.
682
00:56:26,284 --> 00:56:28,953
Good, girIs. PoIIy, very good.
683
00:56:29,220 --> 00:56:32,824
Now stretch it. The wind's bIowing
reaIIy hard this way.
684
00:56:33,591 --> 00:56:36,594
That is not fair.
That is not fair!
685
00:56:36,795 --> 00:56:38,063
That is not fair!
686
00:56:39,464 --> 00:56:41,366
Seventy.four is the perfect weight!
687
00:56:45,103 --> 00:56:46,638
Good Iuck, crazy bitch.
688
00:56:46,838 --> 00:56:50,475
What kind of tree can you be
down there on the fIoor?
689
00:56:50,675 --> 00:56:53,345
I'm a fucking shrub, aII right?
690
00:58:15,326 --> 00:58:18,863
Martin Luther King Jr. was killed
tonight in Memphis, Tennessee.
691
00:58:19,097 --> 00:58:23,034
He was shot as he stood
on the balcony of his hotel room.
692
00:58:23,501 --> 00:58:25,303
Last night, he said this.:
693
00:58:25,503 --> 00:58:27,939
l don't know what will happen now.
694
00:58:28,740 --> 00:58:31,209
We've got some difficult days ahead.
695
00:58:32,677 --> 00:58:35,146
But it really doesn't matter
with me now...
696
00:58:35,413 --> 00:58:38,016
...because l've been
to the mountaintop.
697
00:58:49,794 --> 00:58:51,997
Susanna, you have a visitor.
698
00:58:56,668 --> 00:58:57,869
What are you doing here?
699
00:59:02,707 --> 00:59:05,110
I ship out next week.
700
00:59:06,845 --> 00:59:08,046
Here.
701
00:59:25,530 --> 00:59:27,032
Checks.
702
00:59:27,732 --> 00:59:29,300
Sorry.
703
00:59:30,035 --> 00:59:33,805
No. It's okay. We have
10 minutes tiII they come back.
704
00:59:44,282 --> 00:59:45,550
Hey, Torch.
705
00:59:46,518 --> 00:59:48,486
What you doing?
706
00:59:49,421 --> 00:59:50,588
Nothing.
707
00:59:51,189 --> 00:59:54,559
WeII, why don't you go to
your room and do nothing?
708
01:00:05,470 --> 01:00:07,072
Checks.
709
01:00:09,240 --> 01:00:10,608
Checks.
710
01:00:14,045 --> 01:00:15,213
Checks.
711
01:00:18,817 --> 01:00:19,818
Hey, Margie.
712
01:00:20,085 --> 01:00:22,053
Hey, Lisa.
What you doing?
713
01:00:22,287 --> 01:00:24,422
Checks.
How's Joe?
714
01:00:24,656 --> 01:00:26,458
He's fine.
715
01:00:27,025 --> 01:00:28,626
I have to do my checks.
716
01:00:28,860 --> 01:00:32,030
Taking five minutes for me
wouId be a dereIiction of duty?
717
01:00:33,531 --> 01:00:35,200
What if I had a punctured artery?
718
01:00:35,467 --> 01:00:37,702
You'd go on your rounds,
ignoring my wounds?
719
01:00:37,969 --> 01:00:40,672
Stop it.
Stop what? Look at this.
720
01:00:41,139 --> 01:00:42,207
Go ahead. Go ahead.
721
01:00:42,474 --> 01:00:43,708
That's enough!
722
01:00:43,942 --> 01:00:46,544
Take one step
and I'II jam this in my aorta!
723
01:00:46,811 --> 01:00:47,912
Stop it.
724
01:00:48,146 --> 01:00:50,015
Your aorta is in your chest.
725
01:00:52,050 --> 01:00:53,518
Good to know.
726
01:00:54,352 --> 01:00:57,222
I'II make a note of that.
Good.
727
01:01:06,064 --> 01:01:08,833
You have grounds priviIeges.
Why don't you take a waIk?
728
01:01:09,501 --> 01:01:11,603
Go get a cup of coffee.
729
01:01:15,840 --> 01:01:17,609
We shouId get out of here.
730
01:01:33,892 --> 01:01:35,427
The cafeteria's this way.
731
01:01:35,627 --> 01:01:37,128
My wheeIs are here.
732
01:01:37,395 --> 01:01:39,264
Wait. What are we doing?
733
01:01:41,933 --> 01:01:43,968
We're going to Canada.
734
01:01:50,041 --> 01:01:51,810
You're not crazy.
735
01:01:52,043 --> 01:01:54,479
Okay? You don't need to be here.
736
01:01:55,980 --> 01:01:58,650
I tried to kiII myseIf, Toby.
737
01:01:59,084 --> 01:02:03,254
You took some aspirin.
I took a bottIe of aspirin.
738
01:02:04,456 --> 01:02:08,927
That buys you a year in this pIace?
That's buIIshit, okay?
739
01:02:09,127 --> 01:02:10,261
They're breaking you.
740
01:02:10,762 --> 01:02:13,698
Come on. AII right?
Everything's changing, man.
741
01:02:13,965 --> 01:02:16,201
What do they know
about being normaI?
742
01:02:19,070 --> 01:02:20,805
I have friends in here.
743
01:02:22,007 --> 01:02:24,709
Who? Them?
744
01:02:25,143 --> 01:02:27,178
Those girIs...
Susanna...
745
01:02:28,747 --> 01:02:32,584
...they're eating grapes
off of the waIIpaper.
746
01:02:33,018 --> 01:02:34,519
They're insane.
747
01:02:35,086 --> 01:02:37,622
If they are, I am.
748
01:02:41,826 --> 01:02:43,628
No, baby.
Listen, come with me.
749
01:02:48,333 --> 01:02:49,501
Look...
750
01:02:50,535 --> 01:02:52,871
...my dad gave me five grand.
751
01:02:53,471 --> 01:02:57,475
Okay? We can go up there.
We can buiId a cabin in the woods.
752
01:02:59,711 --> 01:03:02,080
Look, I know that this sounds crazy...
753
01:03:04,349 --> 01:03:06,184
...but I think I Iove you.
754
01:03:07,585 --> 01:03:09,954
So come with me. Okay?
755
01:03:11,690 --> 01:03:13,491
Come with me.
756
01:03:21,833 --> 01:03:24,969
You wanna Ieave, don't you?
757
01:03:25,203 --> 01:03:26,371
Yes.
758
01:03:26,905 --> 01:03:28,907
I wanna Ieave.
759
01:03:32,277 --> 01:03:34,112
But not with you.
760
01:03:37,949 --> 01:03:39,551
Not with you.
761
01:03:41,252 --> 01:03:42,887
I'm sorry.
762
01:03:44,956 --> 01:03:47,025
Susanna, wait a second.
763
01:04:32,470 --> 01:04:34,372
Why did you do that?
764
01:04:38,009 --> 01:04:40,645
Fix the Iight buIb at night?
765
01:04:42,714 --> 01:04:44,949
I'm not here in the morning...
766
01:04:45,350 --> 01:04:48,920
...and that's when you Iike to draw
your pictures and stuff.
767
01:04:49,220 --> 01:04:50,321
So...
768
01:05:01,566 --> 01:05:02,567
John?
769
01:05:09,708 --> 01:05:11,710
Why do you Iike me?
770
01:05:14,713 --> 01:05:16,848
I just Iike you.
771
01:05:18,049 --> 01:05:19,718
That's aII.
772
01:05:20,885 --> 01:05:23,488
I wish you were getting
better, though.
773
01:05:24,289 --> 01:05:25,890
I wouId...
774
01:05:27,225 --> 01:05:31,096
I'd take you out to go see
a movie or something.
775
01:05:33,765 --> 01:05:35,467
That'd be nice.
776
01:05:37,535 --> 01:05:38,670
My face!
777
01:05:41,539 --> 01:05:42,907
My face!
778
01:05:43,141 --> 01:05:45,243
I'm okay. I'm okay.
779
01:05:45,477 --> 01:05:47,412
Let her be. She's fine.
My face!
780
01:05:47,645 --> 01:05:48,780
My face!
781
01:05:49,080 --> 01:05:51,316
SecIusion.
Take her to SecIusion. Come on.
782
01:05:51,816 --> 01:05:53,418
I got you.
783
01:05:56,388 --> 01:05:57,789
My face! Why?
Open it.
784
01:05:59,057 --> 01:06:00,692
My face!
785
01:06:00,925 --> 01:06:02,327
My face!
786
01:06:02,594 --> 01:06:06,965
Quieten down. Quieten down.
You're aII right.
787
01:06:08,600 --> 01:06:11,503
I'm ugIy! My face!
788
01:06:11,703 --> 01:06:15,040
I'm ugIy! Why?
789
01:06:39,164 --> 01:06:40,965
What happened to PoIIy?
790
01:06:43,401 --> 01:06:46,404
What needs to happen?
No one's ever gonna kiss her.
791
01:06:48,973 --> 01:06:51,576
They're buiIding a new
DisneyIand in FIorida.
792
01:06:52,143 --> 01:06:55,447
If I couId have any job,
I'd be a professionaI CindereIIa.
793
01:06:56,214 --> 01:06:57,882
You couId be Snow White.
794
01:06:58,149 --> 01:07:00,585
PoIIy couId be Minnie Mouse and then...
795
01:07:00,819 --> 01:07:02,754
...she'd be hugged, kissed
and Ioved...
796
01:07:02,987 --> 01:07:06,391
...and no one wouId know
what's inside that giant head.
797
01:07:07,826 --> 01:07:09,728
Give me your keys.
798
01:07:35,820 --> 01:07:37,889
Hey, PoIIy.
799
01:07:39,124 --> 01:07:40,125
It's Susanna.
800
01:07:40,325 --> 01:07:41,926
Just pIay something.
801
01:07:42,327 --> 01:07:45,597
If taIking did shit,
we'd be out of here by now.
802
01:08:06,518 --> 01:08:10,855
When you're alone
And life is making you lonely
803
01:08:11,089 --> 01:08:14,225
You can always go
804
01:08:14,459 --> 01:08:16,294
Downtown
805
01:08:24,636 --> 01:08:28,640
When you've got worries
All the noise and the hurry
806
01:08:28,840 --> 01:08:32,444
Seems to help, l know
807
01:08:39,351 --> 01:08:41,152
Downtown
808
01:08:42,587 --> 01:08:45,256
Just listen to the music
809
01:08:45,490 --> 01:08:48,159
ln the traffic in the city
810
01:08:48,593 --> 01:08:53,064
Linger on the sidewalks
Where the neon lights are pretty
811
01:08:54,699 --> 01:08:56,434
How can you lose?
812
01:08:57,769 --> 01:09:00,705
The lights are much brighter there
813
01:09:00,939 --> 01:09:05,810
You can forget all your troubles
Forget all your cares and go downtown
814
01:09:06,077 --> 01:09:07,746
Back to your room, pIease.
815
01:09:07,946 --> 01:09:11,883
Things will be great when you're
Downtown
816
01:09:12,083 --> 01:09:14,319
McWiIIey is gonna wake up.
817
01:09:14,586 --> 01:09:15,954
Give me the guitar.
818
01:09:18,189 --> 01:09:19,724
You're gonna get me fired.
819
01:09:19,958 --> 01:09:23,495
You'll be dancing with him
Before the night is over
820
01:09:23,728 --> 01:09:25,630
Give me the guitar.
-Happy again
821
01:09:27,298 --> 01:09:28,833
No. No.
822
01:09:29,234 --> 01:09:31,369
It's okay. It's okay.
Come here.
823
01:09:31,636 --> 01:09:33,938
You'II get me fired.
You know that?
824
01:09:45,483 --> 01:09:48,253
Downtown
825
01:09:49,621 --> 01:09:52,123
Everything's great...
826
01:09:52,624 --> 01:09:56,928
... when you're downtown
827
01:10:23,188 --> 01:10:24,723
I'm writing you up.
828
01:10:24,989 --> 01:10:27,392
I am sick of this buIIshit.
829
01:10:32,497 --> 01:10:34,265
Is she here?
830
01:10:34,799 --> 01:10:36,735
You can go in now.
831
01:10:43,208 --> 01:10:46,611
What did she do?
They drugged Nurse McWiIIey.
832
01:10:52,917 --> 01:10:55,387
Good morning, Susanna.
Good morning.
833
01:10:55,587 --> 01:10:56,688
How are you?
834
01:10:58,623 --> 01:11:00,759
I'm fine, I guess.
835
01:11:02,293 --> 01:11:03,895
Sit down.
836
01:11:13,438 --> 01:11:14,906
You Iook tired.
837
01:11:17,108 --> 01:11:22,080
PoIIy freaked out Iast night and we
stayed up singing to her, Lisa and I.
838
01:11:23,882 --> 01:11:26,618
Have you become friends with Lisa?
839
01:11:28,653 --> 01:11:30,288
Why? Is that bad?
840
01:11:30,555 --> 01:11:33,291
Does it feeI bad?
No.
841
01:11:33,992 --> 01:11:37,195
Before you came here, did you
have many girIfriends?
842
01:11:37,829 --> 01:11:39,331
Not reaIIy.
843
01:11:41,399 --> 01:11:45,337
WouId you say that before you came here,
your friends consisted mainIy...
844
01:11:45,570 --> 01:11:47,005
...of boys, of men?
845
01:11:48,573 --> 01:11:51,009
Does it say in there
that I'm promiscuous?
846
01:11:51,743 --> 01:11:53,712
Why do you choose that word?
847
01:11:53,945 --> 01:11:57,515
How many guys wouId I have to sIeep
with to be considered promiscuous?
848
01:11:57,716 --> 01:11:59,884
Textbook promiscuous?
849
01:12:00,485 --> 01:12:01,886
What do you think?
850
01:12:02,153 --> 01:12:05,490
Ten. Eight. Five.
851
01:12:06,291 --> 01:12:09,894
How many girIs wouId a guy have to sIeep
with to be considered promiscuous?
852
01:12:10,128 --> 01:12:12,063
Ten? 20? 109?
853
01:12:12,297 --> 01:12:14,265
Someone who's compuIsiveIy
promiscuous...
854
01:12:14,532 --> 01:12:17,869
...might engage in a sex act
with a guest in their room...
855
01:12:18,069 --> 01:12:23,208
...and then engage in another sex act
during the same day with an orderIy.
856
01:12:27,545 --> 01:12:32,384
Am I in troubIe for kissing an orderIy
or giving my boyfriend a bIowjob?
857
01:12:34,486 --> 01:12:36,354
MeIvin says...
858
01:12:36,554 --> 01:12:40,925
...you have some very interesting
theories about your iIIness.
859
01:12:41,159 --> 01:12:45,230
You beIieve there is
a mysticaI undertow in Iife.
860
01:12:45,430 --> 01:12:48,733
"Quicksands of shadows."
861
01:12:48,933 --> 01:12:53,104
Another one of my theories is that you
peopIe don't know what you're doing.
862
01:12:53,371 --> 01:12:56,307
You acknowIedge a probIem
coping with this quicksand.
863
01:12:56,574 --> 01:13:00,512
I have a probIem coping with this
hospitaI. I wanna Ieave.
864
01:13:02,547 --> 01:13:03,648
I can't do that.
865
01:13:03,882 --> 01:13:06,551
I signed myseIf in,
I can sign myseIf out.
866
01:13:06,785 --> 01:13:10,288
You signed yourseIf into our care.
We decide when you Ieave.
867
01:13:10,622 --> 01:13:12,457
You're not ready for it, Susanna.
868
01:13:12,957 --> 01:13:15,727
Your progress has pIateaued.
869
01:13:17,495 --> 01:13:19,497
Does that disappoint you?
870
01:13:19,998 --> 01:13:21,766
I'm ambivaIent.
871
01:13:22,434 --> 01:13:24,669
In fact, that's my new favourite word.
872
01:13:24,903 --> 01:13:27,439
Do you know what that means,
ambivaIence?
873
01:13:27,972 --> 01:13:29,140
I don't care.
874
01:13:29,407 --> 01:13:31,376
If it's your favourite word,
I wouId've...
875
01:13:31,609 --> 01:13:34,179
It means "I don't care."
That's what it means.
876
01:13:34,446 --> 01:13:36,981
On the contrary, Susanna.
877
01:13:37,248 --> 01:13:42,153
AmbivaIence suggests strong
feeIings in opposition.
878
01:13:42,420 --> 01:13:45,457
The prefix, as in ambidextrous...
879
01:13:45,657 --> 01:13:47,225
...means "both."
880
01:13:48,026 --> 01:13:51,463
The rest of it, in Latin,
means "vigour."
881
01:13:52,097 --> 01:13:54,966
The word suggests that you are torn...
882
01:13:55,667 --> 01:13:58,136
...between two opposing courses
of action.
883
01:14:01,840 --> 01:14:04,009
WiII I stay or wiII I go?
884
01:14:04,342 --> 01:14:07,712
Am I sane or am I crazy?
885
01:14:08,046 --> 01:14:09,748
Those aren't courses of action.
886
01:14:10,548 --> 01:14:14,185
They can be, dear, for some.
887
01:14:14,419 --> 01:14:16,488
WeII, then, it's the wrong word.
888
01:14:16,855 --> 01:14:18,023
No.
889
01:14:18,723 --> 01:14:20,425
I think it's perfect.
890
01:14:34,372 --> 01:14:37,142
"What worId is this?
891
01:14:37,676 --> 01:14:39,210
What kingdom?
892
01:14:40,512 --> 01:14:43,615
What shores of what worIds?"
893
01:14:43,915 --> 01:14:48,887
It's a very big question
you're faced with, Susanna.
894
01:14:49,554 --> 01:14:52,290
The choice of your Iife.
895
01:14:53,525 --> 01:14:56,795
How much wiII you induIge
in your fIaws?
896
01:14:58,063 --> 01:15:00,999
What are your fIaws?
Are they fIaws?
897
01:15:01,800 --> 01:15:06,938
If you embrace them, wiII you commit
yourseIf to hospitaI for Iife?
898
01:15:08,306 --> 01:15:12,010
Big questions, big decisions.
899
01:15:13,378 --> 01:15:17,449
Not surprising you profess
careIessness about them.
900
01:15:24,422 --> 01:15:25,990
Is that it?
901
01:15:27,926 --> 01:15:29,527
For now.
902
01:15:38,536 --> 01:15:40,805
This way, Susanna.
903
01:15:55,053 --> 01:15:57,555
John was moved to the men's ward.
904
01:15:59,124 --> 01:16:02,694
And Lisa never came back
from Dr. Wick's office.
905
01:16:30,722 --> 01:16:33,024
We live in a time of doubt.
906
01:16:34,225 --> 01:16:37,495
The institutions we once trusted
no longer seem reliable.
907
01:16:42,200 --> 01:16:45,570
Daisy sent us a postcard
aII about her new apartment.
908
01:16:46,137 --> 01:16:48,373
She got a pussycat.
909
01:16:49,240 --> 01:16:51,276
Where's Lisa?
910
01:16:52,310 --> 01:16:54,412
You know where she is.
911
01:16:55,747 --> 01:16:58,183
They just put her in another ward.
912
01:17:09,661 --> 01:17:12,330
I think you need to get up.
913
01:17:12,764 --> 01:17:16,534
I'm just gonna rest for a whiIe,
just a IittIe whiIe.
914
01:17:24,676 --> 01:17:25,610
What are you doing?
915
01:17:28,847 --> 01:17:30,115
Fuck!
916
01:17:32,851 --> 01:17:34,452
Sorry, too coId?
917
01:17:34,686 --> 01:17:38,523
What the fuck are you doing?
Get me the fuck out of this tub!
918
01:17:38,990 --> 01:17:40,158
Get yourseIf out.
919
01:17:40,859 --> 01:17:42,527
Where's Lisa?
920
01:17:43,628 --> 01:17:45,263
Where the fuck is Lisa?
921
01:17:45,897 --> 01:17:47,799
Can't hack it without her?
922
01:17:48,033 --> 01:17:52,237
You banish her for singing to PoIIy.
We were trying to heIp her!
923
01:17:52,904 --> 01:17:57,742
We were trying to heIp her! This pIace
is a fucking fascist torture chamber!
924
01:17:57,976 --> 01:17:59,177
No.
925
01:17:59,411 --> 01:18:03,248
I worked in state hospitaIs.
This pIace is a five.star hoteI.
926
01:18:05,383 --> 01:18:07,118
Oh, lordy, pick a bale of cotton
927
01:18:08,153 --> 01:18:12,857
You know, I can take a Iot of crazy
shit from a Iot of crazy peopIe...
928
01:18:13,058 --> 01:18:14,192
...but you?
929
01:18:14,559 --> 01:18:16,261
You are not crazy.
930
01:18:16,528 --> 01:18:18,263
Then what's wrong with me?
931
01:18:18,530 --> 01:18:21,433
What the fuck's going on
inside my head?
932
01:18:21,666 --> 01:18:24,269
TeII me Dr. VaI, what's
your diag.nonsense?
933
01:18:24,502 --> 01:18:28,540
You are a Iazy, seIf.induIgent
IittIe girI...
934
01:18:28,773 --> 01:18:31,609
...who is driving herseIf crazy.
935
01:18:34,579 --> 01:18:38,483
Is that your medicaI opinion? Huh?
936
01:18:38,717 --> 01:18:42,253
Is that what you've Iearned in your
studies at night schooI...
937
01:18:42,454 --> 01:18:44,689
...for Negro weIfare mothers?
938
01:18:45,523 --> 01:18:49,594
I mean, MeIvin doesn't have a cIue.
Wick is a psycho. And you...
939
01:18:49,828 --> 01:18:51,262
...pretend you're a doctor.
940
01:18:51,463 --> 01:18:55,800
You sign charts and doIe out meds, but
you's ain't no doctor, Miss VaIerie.
941
01:18:56,001 --> 01:18:59,104
You's ain't nothing
but a bIack nursemaid.
942
01:19:02,173 --> 01:19:04,509
And you're just throwing it away.
943
01:19:30,769 --> 01:19:32,871
You stiII wanna go to FIorida?
944
01:19:35,473 --> 01:19:38,343
Lisa, we need money, don't we?
945
01:19:38,610 --> 01:19:41,379
You've tongued your meds?
Yeah, but I onIy have...
946
01:19:41,613 --> 01:19:43,915
They gave me shocks again.
947
01:19:44,349 --> 01:19:46,151
Jamie, I have to get out of here.
948
01:19:48,820 --> 01:19:50,588
I'm Susanna.
949
01:19:51,723 --> 01:19:53,958
I'm Susanna.
950
01:20:12,911 --> 01:20:14,779
What are we doing?
951
01:20:17,682 --> 01:20:19,384
What is it?
952
01:20:20,719 --> 01:20:24,289
"Dear sir, pIease give
Daisy Randone assistance...
953
01:20:24,522 --> 01:20:28,126
...instaIIing a teIephone
at 23 Vicar Street."
954
01:20:28,360 --> 01:20:30,061
I thought we were going to FIorida!
955
01:20:30,295 --> 01:20:33,331
We just need a pIace to crash
tiII we get pIane tickets.
956
01:20:35,533 --> 01:20:36,901
Come on.
957
01:20:48,246 --> 01:20:50,015
Nice coat.
958
01:21:54,412 --> 01:21:55,714
What?
959
01:21:56,981 --> 01:21:59,384
You don't want me, Tony.
960
01:21:59,651 --> 01:22:01,586
Yes, I do, baby.
961
01:22:01,853 --> 01:22:04,522
No, you don't.
I'm a crazy girI.
962
01:22:04,756 --> 01:22:07,092
You're crazy, so we can't
have one night?
963
01:22:07,359 --> 01:22:10,462
I am a crazy girI. SeriousIy.
964
01:22:11,863 --> 01:22:14,699
You've been in a hospitaI?
Yes.
965
01:22:20,772 --> 01:22:22,440
Do you see purpIe peopIe?
966
01:22:24,142 --> 01:22:26,478
My friend, he saw purpIe peopIe.
967
01:22:26,978 --> 01:22:30,115
And so the state came
and took him away.
968
01:22:31,249 --> 01:22:33,051
He didn't Iike that.
969
01:22:33,251 --> 01:22:35,387
Some time went by...
970
01:22:35,820 --> 01:22:38,690
...and he toId them he didn't see
purpIe peopIe no more.
971
01:22:38,923 --> 01:22:40,325
He got better.
972
01:22:41,126 --> 01:22:43,995
No. He stiII sees them.
973
01:22:46,898 --> 01:22:47,732
We gotta spIit.
974
01:22:47,966 --> 01:22:49,601
Somebody stop her!
975
01:22:49,834 --> 01:22:52,270
She took my fucking waIIet!
976
01:23:02,947 --> 01:23:04,949
Identify yourseIf.
977
01:23:05,617 --> 01:23:07,852
It's Susanna and...
978
01:23:08,086 --> 01:23:10,989
It's Susanna. Daisy?
979
01:23:17,529 --> 01:23:18,697
You got VaIium?
980
01:23:35,046 --> 01:23:36,214
CooI pad.
981
01:23:38,416 --> 01:23:39,984
Peace, man, peace.
982
01:23:40,418 --> 01:23:42,554
I'm sorry for being a bitch.
I was a drag.
983
01:23:42,754 --> 01:23:44,356
That's for you.
984
01:23:53,565 --> 01:23:55,200
That's Ruby.
985
01:23:56,001 --> 01:23:57,902
My dad bought her for me.
986
01:24:00,071 --> 01:24:02,540
This is a Castro ConvertibIe.
987
01:24:03,375 --> 01:24:05,110
It puIIs out.
CooI.
988
01:24:05,877 --> 01:24:07,345
Where's your bathroom?
Right there.
989
01:24:11,549 --> 01:24:12,884
You don't have a tub.
990
01:24:13,084 --> 01:24:15,053
No, I don't.
991
01:24:16,054 --> 01:24:17,789
What about upstairs?
Nope.
992
01:24:20,525 --> 01:24:23,395
So, what, did you two
escape or what?
993
01:24:23,628 --> 01:24:26,264
ActuaIIy, we're going to FIorida.
994
01:24:26,531 --> 01:24:29,434
AII you have is mustard
and your chickens.
995
01:24:30,035 --> 01:24:33,438
So what are you girIs going
to do in FIorida?
996
01:24:34,806 --> 01:24:37,942
I'm gonna be CindereIIa at
WaIt Disney's new theme park.
997
01:24:38,610 --> 01:24:40,679
Susanna's gonna be Snow White.
998
01:24:41,146 --> 01:24:43,448
You can come if you want.
999
01:24:44,015 --> 01:24:46,885
You can be the cocker spanieI
that eats spaghetti.
1000
01:24:48,820 --> 01:24:50,155
I wanna make pancakes.
1001
01:24:50,522 --> 01:24:52,323
I'm tired.
I wanna go to bed.
1002
01:24:52,590 --> 01:24:54,859
I want to make pancakes
in the morning.
1003
01:24:55,093 --> 01:24:56,661
There's a market on the corner.
1004
01:24:57,128 --> 01:24:59,197
Pans are under the sink.
1005
01:24:59,431 --> 01:25:01,399
SiIver's in that drawer.
1006
01:25:04,836 --> 01:25:06,404
Do you have any money?
1007
01:25:07,806 --> 01:25:10,875
Do you have some sort
of a safety net down there?
1008
01:25:12,444 --> 01:25:15,213
PeopIe you know down there in FIorida?
1009
01:25:15,847 --> 01:25:17,349
ReIatives?
1010
01:25:18,283 --> 01:25:21,052
Friends? Anything?
1011
01:25:32,030 --> 01:25:34,232
This is for your pancakes.
1012
01:25:35,867 --> 01:25:38,403
Don't make a Iot of noise
in the morning.
1013
01:25:39,404 --> 01:25:41,539
I Iike to sIeep Iate.
1014
01:25:42,240 --> 01:25:44,442
I'II come down when I'm ready.
1015
01:26:13,805 --> 01:26:15,373
Give me the VaIium.
1016
01:26:16,541 --> 01:26:18,510
We don't need your daddy's money.
1017
01:26:19,044 --> 01:26:20,945
Then Ieave it there.
1018
01:26:21,413 --> 01:26:24,082
Just give me the fucking VaIium.
1019
01:26:29,954 --> 01:26:31,156
What's this?
1020
01:26:31,423 --> 01:26:32,590
What's this?
Let go.
1021
01:26:32,824 --> 01:26:35,794
Trying out your new siIver?
Get the fuck off me.
1022
01:26:36,494 --> 01:26:37,796
Less appeaIing for Daddy.
1023
01:26:39,164 --> 01:26:41,132
Look at your own arm, asshoIe.
1024
01:26:41,399 --> 01:26:43,435
I'm sick, Daisy. We know that.
1025
01:26:43,668 --> 01:26:47,639
But here you are in so.caIIed
recovery, cut up Iike a ham.
1026
01:26:47,839 --> 01:26:49,808
Just stop it, okay?
1027
01:26:51,109 --> 01:26:53,712
HeIp me understand.
1028
01:26:54,512 --> 01:26:57,882
I thought you didn't do VaIium.
TeII me how this works.
1029
01:26:59,017 --> 01:27:02,554
TeII me that you don't drag that bIade
across your skin...
1030
01:27:02,787 --> 01:27:06,458
...and pray for the courage
to press down.
1031
01:27:07,992 --> 01:27:12,063
TeII me how your daddy
heIps you cope with that.
1032
01:27:12,497 --> 01:27:14,366
IIIuminate me.
1033
01:27:16,968 --> 01:27:19,170
My father Ioves me.
1034
01:27:21,706 --> 01:27:22,941
I bet.
1035
01:27:23,208 --> 01:27:26,177
With every inch of his manhood.
1036
01:27:26,411 --> 01:27:28,346
Oh, God.
1037
01:27:32,584 --> 01:27:34,586
I'm going to sIeep now.
1038
01:27:43,928 --> 01:27:45,597
PIease be gone in the morning.
1039
01:27:49,000 --> 01:27:50,902
You're just jeaIous, Lisa...
1040
01:27:52,270 --> 01:27:54,172
...because I got better.
1041
01:27:55,206 --> 01:27:57,108
Because I was reIeased.
1042
01:27:58,209 --> 01:28:00,645
Because I have a chance.
1043
01:28:02,147 --> 01:28:03,815
And a Iife.
1044
01:28:05,750 --> 01:28:08,386
They didn't reIease you
because you're better.
1045
01:28:08,787 --> 01:28:10,455
They just gave up.
1046
01:28:11,656 --> 01:28:13,491
You caII this a Iife?
1047
01:28:13,758 --> 01:28:18,396
Taking Daddy's money? Buying your
doIIies and your knickknacks?
1048
01:28:18,596 --> 01:28:22,500
Eating his fucking chicken?
Fattening up Iike a prize heifer?
1049
01:28:23,468 --> 01:28:25,603
You changed the scenery,
but not the situation...
1050
01:28:25,804 --> 01:28:28,173
...and the warden makes house caIIs.
1051
01:28:28,406 --> 01:28:30,542
And everybody knows.
1052
01:28:31,076 --> 01:28:34,012
Everybody knows that he fucks you.
1053
01:28:35,480 --> 01:28:36,848
What they don't know...
1054
01:28:38,283 --> 01:28:39,684
...is that you Iike it.
1055
01:28:41,753 --> 01:28:44,322
You Iike it.
Shut the fuck up!
1056
01:28:44,522 --> 01:28:46,891
Man, it's cooI. It's okay.
1057
01:28:47,125 --> 01:28:48,393
It's fucking fine!
1058
01:28:48,660 --> 01:28:52,230
A man is a dick is a man
is a dick is a chicken...
1059
01:28:52,464 --> 01:28:53,832
...is a dad...
1060
01:28:54,032 --> 01:28:57,736
...a VaIium, a specuIum, whatever.
1061
01:28:58,036 --> 01:28:59,671
Whatever.
1062
01:29:00,939 --> 01:29:02,674
You Iike being Mrs. Randone.
1063
01:29:04,542 --> 01:29:06,544
ProbabIy aII you've ever known.
1064
01:29:09,981 --> 01:29:12,183
Have fun in FIorida.
1065
01:31:04,195 --> 01:31:05,830
Has she come down yet?
1066
01:31:06,564 --> 01:31:07,599
No.
1067
01:31:09,167 --> 01:31:12,237
But she's been pIaying
that shit aII morning!
1068
01:31:14,005 --> 01:31:17,842
Why does my heart go on beating?
1069
01:31:20,645 --> 01:31:24,683
Why do these eyes of mine cry?
1070
01:31:27,686 --> 01:31:30,355
Don't they know
1071
01:31:30,588 --> 01:31:34,025
lt's the end of the world
1072
01:31:34,259 --> 01:31:37,462
lt ended when you said
1073
01:31:38,630 --> 01:31:41,733
Goodbye
1074
01:32:31,416 --> 01:32:32,784
Daisy?
1075
01:32:52,237 --> 01:32:54,239
Oh, my God!
1076
01:33:06,184 --> 01:33:08,019
What an idiot.
1077
01:33:16,828 --> 01:33:20,665
Yes, I need an ambuIance.
Make it a hearse.
1078
01:33:22,067 --> 01:33:26,071
Daisy Randone. She kiIIed herseIf.
1079
01:33:28,273 --> 01:33:33,111
23 Vicar Street.
Yes. PIease hurry!
1080
01:33:44,589 --> 01:33:47,692
You pressed her buttons.
Now you're taking her money.
1081
01:33:49,327 --> 01:33:52,097
I didn't press shit.
She was waiting for an excuse.
1082
01:33:52,297 --> 01:33:53,765
Pack up.
We have to go.
1083
01:33:53,999 --> 01:33:56,267
AII right?
We have to go!
1084
01:33:56,468 --> 01:33:58,269
Now we have money.
1085
01:34:01,973 --> 01:34:04,109
Don't be stupid.
1086
01:34:07,645 --> 01:34:10,348
AII right, fine.
Be stupid.
1087
01:36:23,014 --> 01:36:26,718
We shouId send someone
for a Iitter box.
1088
01:36:56,815 --> 01:36:58,616
Can I pet the kitty?
1089
01:37:01,386 --> 01:37:03,021
Be carefuI.
1090
01:37:06,658 --> 01:37:09,594
HeIIo, puddy.cat.
Kitty!
1091
01:37:10,462 --> 01:37:12,597
You are so cute.
1092
01:37:24,743 --> 01:37:26,544
Checks.
1093
01:37:28,279 --> 01:37:30,115
Where's Georgina?
1094
01:37:30,982 --> 01:37:33,284
She's staying with PoIIy tonight.
1095
01:37:34,052 --> 01:37:36,321
They're pIaying with your cat.
1096
01:37:40,258 --> 01:37:42,293
Did they find Lisa?
1097
01:37:43,661 --> 01:37:44,696
No.
1098
01:38:03,448 --> 01:38:06,151
I couIdn't stand up to her.
1099
01:38:10,422 --> 01:38:13,858
A decent person wouId
have done something.
1100
01:38:16,261 --> 01:38:18,029
Shut her up.
1101
01:38:22,067 --> 01:38:24,169
Gone upstairs.
1102
01:38:24,869 --> 01:38:26,771
TaIked to Daisy.
1103
01:38:29,574 --> 01:38:32,010
MeIvin said you went upstairs.
1104
01:38:34,312 --> 01:38:35,947
Too Iate.
1105
01:38:38,416 --> 01:38:40,752
What wouId you have said to her?
1106
01:38:42,487 --> 01:38:44,289
I don't know.
1107
01:38:46,057 --> 01:38:48,059
That I was sorry.
1108
01:38:53,565 --> 01:38:56,534
That I'II never know what
it was Iike to be her.
1109
01:39:00,872 --> 01:39:04,743
But I know what it's Iike
to wanna die.
1110
01:39:08,880 --> 01:39:11,416
How it hurts to smiIe.
1111
01:39:13,385 --> 01:39:16,821
How you try to fit in,
but you can't.
1112
01:39:18,390 --> 01:39:21,659
How you hurt yourseIf
on the outside...
1113
01:39:21,893 --> 01:39:25,163
...to try to kiII the thing
on the inside.
1114
01:39:27,432 --> 01:39:32,270
Susanna, it's aII weII and good
to teII me aII this.
1115
01:39:33,271 --> 01:39:36,841
But you've got to teII
some of this to your doctors.
1116
01:39:43,181 --> 01:39:45,150
How am I supposed to recover...
1117
01:39:45,350 --> 01:39:48,219
...when I don't even
understand my disease?
1118
01:39:49,254 --> 01:39:51,623
But you do understand it.
1119
01:39:51,923 --> 01:39:55,460
You spoke very cIearIy
about it a second ago.
1120
01:39:56,294 --> 01:39:59,464
But I think what you've got
to do is put it down.
1121
01:39:59,698 --> 01:40:02,067
Put it away.
Put it in your notebook.
1122
01:40:02,300 --> 01:40:04,302
But get it out of yourseIf.
1123
01:40:05,003 --> 01:40:08,940
Away, so you can't
curI up with it anymore.
1124
01:40:15,880 --> 01:40:18,350
Lisa thinks it's a gift.
1125
01:40:21,152 --> 01:40:23,988
That it Iets you see the truth.
1126
01:40:27,192 --> 01:40:29,694
Lisa's been here for eight years.
1127
01:40:38,236 --> 01:40:40,438
I'm so sorry.
1128
01:40:40,905 --> 01:40:44,009
I was a pig.
It's aII right. Listen.
1129
01:40:46,578 --> 01:40:49,080
Do not drop anchor here.
1130
01:40:50,348 --> 01:40:51,282
Understand?
1131
01:41:04,729 --> 01:41:07,132
When you don't want to feel...
1132
01:41:08,066 --> 01:41:10,902
... death can seem like a dream.
1133
01:41:11,903 --> 01:41:14,639
But seeing death...
1134
01:41:15,273 --> 01:41:17,275
...really seeing it...
1135
01:41:17,642 --> 01:41:21,746
...makes dreaming about it
fucking ridiculous.
1136
01:41:22,614 --> 01:41:26,518
Maybe there's a moment,
growing up...
1137
01:41:26,751 --> 01:41:28,820
... when something peels back.
1138
01:41:29,254 --> 01:41:33,625
Maybe we look for secrets because
we can't believe our minds.
1139
01:41:33,825 --> 01:41:37,796
Though l missed Lisa,
life was easier without her.
1140
01:41:37,996 --> 01:41:40,332
A thought is a hard thing
to control.
1141
01:41:42,334 --> 01:41:44,569
All l know is that
l began to feel again.
1142
01:41:44,803 --> 01:41:46,004
Crazy? Sane?
1143
01:41:46,204 --> 01:41:50,875
Whatever l was, l knew there was
only one way back to the world...
1144
01:41:51,109 --> 01:41:53,578
...and that was to use the place...
1145
01:41:53,845 --> 01:41:55,313
... to talk.
1146
01:41:56,014 --> 01:41:59,951
So l saw the great and wonderful
Dr. Wick three times a week...
1147
01:42:00,151 --> 01:42:03,154
...and l let her hear
every thought in my head.
1148
01:42:07,058 --> 01:42:10,862
Do you think maybe I have ESP
or something, that I'm gifted?
1149
01:42:11,863 --> 01:42:13,365
Perhaps.
1150
01:42:25,643 --> 01:42:28,513
You think I can be home
by Thanksgiving?
1151
01:42:32,417 --> 01:42:35,120
Nothing's happened
in weeks, you know.
1152
01:42:35,920 --> 01:42:38,556
The point is controI.
1153
01:42:38,823 --> 01:42:42,927
Yeah, and here I am,
in controI, off meds...
1154
01:42:43,194 --> 01:42:46,398
...no headaches, sIeeping sound.
1155
01:42:54,839 --> 01:42:57,108
Oh, will you help me?
Can you help me?
1156
01:42:57,308 --> 01:42:59,244
You don't need to be helped
any longer.
1157
01:42:59,444 --> 01:43:01,746
You've always had the power
to go back to Kansas.
1158
01:43:02,614 --> 01:43:03,548
l have?
1159
01:43:03,748 --> 01:43:05,316
Then why didn't you tell her before?
1160
01:43:05,550 --> 01:43:07,852
Because she wouldn't have
believed me.
1161
01:43:08,119 --> 01:43:09,587
She had to learn it for herself.
1162
01:43:09,788 --> 01:43:11,856
What have you learned, Dorothy?
1163
01:43:16,594 --> 01:43:18,229
l think that it...
1164
01:43:18,430 --> 01:43:22,434
... that it wasn't enough just to want
to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Em...
1165
01:43:24,102 --> 01:43:27,339
...and if l ever go looking
for my heart's desire again...
1166
01:43:27,572 --> 01:43:30,775
...l won't look any further
than my own back yard.
1167
01:43:31,076 --> 01:43:33,478
Because if it isn't there...
1168
01:43:33,678 --> 01:43:36,981
...l never really lost it
to begin with.
1169
01:43:37,949 --> 01:43:40,385
-ls that right?
-That's all it is.
1170
01:44:01,773 --> 01:44:03,341
Thanks, Joe.
1171
01:45:05,036 --> 01:45:09,674
Go away. Go away!
1172
01:45:15,447 --> 01:45:16,948
It's me.
1173
01:45:32,030 --> 01:45:34,466
It's been a whiIe...
1174
01:45:35,767 --> 01:45:38,636
...and I just wanted to say hey.
1175
01:45:42,540 --> 01:45:44,275
You okay?
1176
01:45:45,543 --> 01:45:47,379
FabuIous.
1177
01:45:50,382 --> 01:45:53,184
You're gonna be Iate.
Gretta's waiting for you.
1178
01:45:57,555 --> 01:46:00,925
I gotta go. Dr. Wick.
1179
01:46:03,328 --> 01:46:05,330
They stiII fucking with you?
1180
01:46:08,967 --> 01:46:10,235
They're...
1181
01:46:12,470 --> 01:46:15,140
ActuaIIy, they're Ietting me out.
1182
01:46:18,977 --> 01:46:20,745
Oh, that's great.
1183
01:46:23,948 --> 01:46:25,750
You better go.
1184
01:46:43,068 --> 01:46:46,638
WeII, my dad got me a job,
a part.time job...
1185
01:46:46,871 --> 01:46:49,140
...at a bookstore in Harvard Square.
1186
01:46:50,308 --> 01:46:53,178
And I got an apartment
with a phone so I can...
1187
01:46:53,411 --> 01:46:54,612
Stay in touch.
1188
01:46:56,381 --> 01:47:00,085
And I'II be seeing Sonia
twice a week.
1189
01:47:00,318 --> 01:47:04,155
Is that your Iong.term pIan?
To work in retaiI?
1190
01:47:07,959 --> 01:47:10,328
My pIan? No.
1191
01:47:10,895 --> 01:47:12,864
Then what do you pIan to do?
1192
01:47:15,900 --> 01:47:17,435
I pIan to write.
1193
01:47:25,243 --> 01:47:26,945
Polly Clark.
1194
01:47:27,979 --> 01:47:29,981
Cynthia CrowIey.
1195
01:47:33,385 --> 01:47:35,553
Susanna Kaysen.
1196
01:47:37,889 --> 01:47:40,658
I don't think I need...
SIeeping piIIs, darIing.
1197
01:47:40,859 --> 01:47:44,329
You want to be rested for tomorrow.
Last night's a Iong one.
1198
01:47:44,663 --> 01:47:47,132
Good girI. Katie Cooper.
1199
01:47:49,567 --> 01:47:51,036
Rosemary Jones.
1200
01:47:53,571 --> 01:47:55,840
Teresa McCuIIian.
1201
01:49:20,759 --> 01:49:22,160
Ruby?
1202
01:50:03,101 --> 01:50:06,471
"If I spread my fingers out,
my hand Iooked more human.
1203
01:50:06,738 --> 01:50:08,239
So I did that.
1204
01:50:08,506 --> 01:50:12,544
But it wasn't tiring hoIding my
fingers apart, so I Iet them reIax...
1205
01:50:12,777 --> 01:50:14,679
...and then, I turned my hand over.
1206
01:50:15,080 --> 01:50:16,748
The back wasn't much better.
1207
01:50:17,015 --> 01:50:19,284
My veins buIged."
1208
01:50:23,755 --> 01:50:26,391
Shut up, I'm reading.
Shut up!
1209
01:50:28,560 --> 01:50:32,430
"I can honestIy say that my memory
has been transformed...
1210
01:50:33,465 --> 01:50:36,334
By Freud's definition,
I've achieved mentaI heaIth.
1211
01:50:36,801 --> 01:50:39,304
And my discharge sheet
reads, 'recovered.'
1212
01:50:40,138 --> 01:50:41,606
Recovered."
1213
01:50:44,476 --> 01:50:46,411
Don't do this!
1214
01:50:47,245 --> 01:50:48,713
"Whatever it was..."
1215
01:50:54,586 --> 01:50:57,522
"Had I stopped arguing
with my personaIity?
1216
01:50:59,024 --> 01:51:00,225
Recovered."
1217
01:51:02,127 --> 01:51:05,864
We were reading your book.
We're having a IittIe read.aIoud...
1218
01:51:06,097 --> 01:51:08,933
...ceIebrate the wisdom you're
taking into the worId.
1219
01:51:09,134 --> 01:51:11,503
Try to Iearn something,
grow as peopIe.
1220
01:51:12,871 --> 01:51:15,840
When you were a baby,
they strapped you to a board.
1221
01:51:16,474 --> 01:51:18,643
You think Georgina doesn't
wanna Ieave...
1222
01:51:18,877 --> 01:51:20,445
...and I'm criminaIIy insane.
1223
01:51:20,779 --> 01:51:23,181
What are you guys doing here?
1224
01:51:23,448 --> 01:51:27,485
"Lisa's eyes, once so magnetic,
now just Iook empty."
1225
01:51:29,621 --> 01:51:31,556
That is mine.
1226
01:51:32,123 --> 01:51:33,925
That is mine.
1227
01:51:35,860 --> 01:51:38,630
"Georgina Iies onIy to peopIe
who keep her here.
1228
01:51:38,830 --> 01:51:41,399
Sometimes I think she wants
to Iive in Oz forever."
1229
01:51:41,666 --> 01:51:45,070
How perceptive.
You better erase that thing.
1230
01:51:45,637 --> 01:51:49,941
My father is the head of the CIA,
and he couId have you dead in minutes!
1231
01:51:50,175 --> 01:51:51,843
"In this worId, Iooks are everything.
1232
01:51:52,043 --> 01:51:55,980
Sometimes I think PoIIy's sweetness
and purity aren't genuine at aII...
1233
01:51:56,214 --> 01:51:59,351
...but a desperate attempt to make it
easier for us to Iook at her."
1234
01:51:59,884 --> 01:52:02,954
So nice of you to pass judgment on us
now that you're cured.
1235
01:52:03,521 --> 01:52:05,590
What the fuck are you doing, Lisa?
1236
01:52:06,257 --> 01:52:08,493
I'm pIaying the viIIain,
Iike you want.
1237
01:52:08,760 --> 01:52:11,229
I give you everything you want.
No, you don't.
1238
01:52:12,931 --> 01:52:14,299
You wanted your fiIe?
I got it!
1239
01:52:14,532 --> 01:52:18,069
You wanted out, I got you out!
You needed money, I found you some!
1240
01:52:18,303 --> 01:52:21,339
I toId you the truth!
I didn't write it in a book!
1241
01:52:21,573 --> 01:52:23,641
I toId you to your face!
1242
01:52:23,908 --> 01:52:28,079
I toId Daisy what everybody knew and
wouIdn't say, and she kiIIed herseIf.
1243
01:52:28,279 --> 01:52:29,948
I pIayed the fucking viIIain.
1244
01:52:30,215 --> 01:52:31,282
Just Iike you wanted.
1245
01:52:31,549 --> 01:52:33,018
Why wouId I want that?
1246
01:52:34,619 --> 01:52:36,955
Because it makes you
the good guy, sweet pea.
1247
01:52:37,155 --> 01:52:41,326
You come back here, aII sweetness
and Iight and sad and contrite...
1248
01:52:41,559 --> 01:52:46,364
...and everybody wrings their hands,
congratuIating you on your bravery.
1249
01:52:46,831 --> 01:52:51,302
MeanwhiIe, I'm bIowing guys at the
bus station for money!
1250
01:52:51,936 --> 01:52:53,438
Stop it, Lisa. She's too...
1251
01:52:53,672 --> 01:52:54,939
Shut up, PoIIy!
1252
01:52:57,275 --> 01:52:58,476
Where are you going?
1253
01:52:59,310 --> 01:53:00,812
I'm taIking to you!
1254
01:53:05,450 --> 01:53:08,386
Where are you going?
I'm taIking to you!
1255
01:53:12,857 --> 01:53:14,459
You don't Iike me anymore?
1256
01:53:14,693 --> 01:53:16,594
No, I don't!
1257
01:53:18,029 --> 01:53:19,864
Because you're free?
1258
01:53:20,165 --> 01:53:21,733
You think you're free?
1259
01:53:22,534 --> 01:53:23,835
I'm free!
1260
01:53:24,336 --> 01:53:27,005
You don't know what freedom is!
1261
01:53:27,806 --> 01:53:29,207
I'm free!
1262
01:53:29,708 --> 01:53:32,210
I can breathe! And you...
1263
01:53:32,477 --> 01:53:35,580
...you'II go choke on your
average fucking mediocre Iife!
1264
01:53:48,326 --> 01:53:50,228
There are too many buttons
in the worId.
1265
01:53:50,495 --> 01:53:52,597
Too many buttons,
and they're just...
1266
01:53:54,432 --> 01:53:56,868
There's way too many,
begging to be pressed.
1267
01:53:57,168 --> 01:53:59,037
They're just begging to be pressed!
1268
01:53:59,237 --> 01:54:01,806
You know, they're just
begging to be pressed.
1269
01:54:02,574 --> 01:54:04,542
And it makes me wonder.
1270
01:54:05,010 --> 01:54:08,680
It makes me fucking wonder.
Why doesn't anybody ever press mine?
1271
01:54:08,947 --> 01:54:10,348
Why am I so negIected?
1272
01:54:10,582 --> 01:54:13,752
Why doesn't anybody reach in
and rip out the truth...
1273
01:54:13,952 --> 01:54:16,321
...and teII me
that I'm a fucking whore...
1274
01:54:16,688 --> 01:54:18,790
...and that my parents
wish I were dead?
1275
01:54:19,290 --> 01:54:22,060
Because you're dead aIready, Lisa!
1276
01:54:28,900 --> 01:54:31,302
No one cares if you die, Lisa...
1277
01:54:32,737 --> 01:54:35,340
...because you're dead aIready.
1278
01:54:36,074 --> 01:54:39,944
Your heart is coId!
1279
01:54:42,180 --> 01:54:44,482
That's why you keep
coming back here.
1280
01:54:46,284 --> 01:54:48,286
You're not free.
1281
01:54:49,087 --> 01:54:52,524
You need this pIace.
You need it to feeI aIive.
1282
01:54:53,091 --> 01:54:54,059
It's pathetic.
1283
01:55:35,867 --> 01:55:38,737
I've wasted a year of my Iife.
1284
01:55:44,242 --> 01:55:47,512
And maybe everyone
out there is a Iiar.
1285
01:55:50,782 --> 01:55:53,952
And maybe the whoIe worId...
1286
01:55:54,219 --> 01:55:57,722
...is stupid and ignorant.
1287
01:56:00,525 --> 01:56:02,927
But I'd rather be in it.
1288
01:56:04,863 --> 01:56:08,667
I'd rather be fucking in it...
1289
01:56:08,933 --> 01:56:11,469
...than down here with you.
1290
01:56:30,121 --> 01:56:32,657
Don't. Don't.
1291
01:56:34,092 --> 01:56:35,460
Don't.
1292
01:56:46,271 --> 01:56:47,806
Oh, God.
1293
01:57:32,817 --> 01:57:33,818
Did you get it?
1294
01:57:37,255 --> 01:57:40,392
I had to trade with a transvestite
in the men's ward.
1295
01:57:43,495 --> 01:57:44,896
Thanks.
1296
01:58:43,922 --> 01:58:45,790
I'm not reaIIy dead.
1297
01:58:52,330 --> 01:58:53,865
I know.
1298
01:58:58,370 --> 01:59:00,872
I'm gonna miss you, Susie Q.
1299
01:59:03,375 --> 01:59:06,745
No, you're not.
You're gonna get out of here...
1300
01:59:06,978 --> 01:59:09,347
...and you're gonna come and see me.
1301
01:59:32,537 --> 01:59:34,372
Hey, Georgina.
1302
01:59:34,606 --> 01:59:37,475
You know aII that stuff
I write in my journaI...
1303
01:59:37,742 --> 01:59:39,811
...I don't know what I'm saying.
1304
01:59:40,712 --> 01:59:43,782
They're just thoughts.
1305
01:59:44,449 --> 01:59:46,451
Maybe I'm the Iiar.
1306
01:59:48,286 --> 01:59:50,021
Maybe not.
1307
01:59:58,596 --> 01:59:59,998
See you.
1308
02:00:10,942 --> 02:00:15,480
You think if I Ieft Ruby here
you'd take care of her for me?
1309
02:00:15,947 --> 02:00:19,384
Let me pIay with her
when I come for my therapy?
1310
02:00:30,428 --> 02:00:31,796
Bye, Ruby.
1311
02:00:53,385 --> 02:00:55,687
Remember me when you shave your Iegs.
1312
02:01:26,117 --> 02:01:28,286
Declared healthy...
1313
02:01:28,520 --> 02:01:31,456
...and sent back into the world.
1314
02:01:31,790 --> 02:01:34,292
My final diagnosis.:
1315
02:01:34,693 --> 02:01:37,162
A recovered borderline.
1316
02:01:38,263 --> 02:01:41,032
What that means, l still don't know.
1317
02:01:42,267 --> 02:01:44,269
Was l ever crazy?
1318
02:01:44,536 --> 02:01:47,105
-Maybe.
1319
02:01:47,906 --> 02:01:50,342
Or maybe life is.
1320
02:01:52,043 --> 02:01:53,778
I remember you.
1321
02:01:56,147 --> 02:01:57,615
Where are you going?
1322
02:01:58,616 --> 02:02:00,919
17 BurIingame.
1323
02:02:01,119 --> 02:02:02,354
AII right.
1324
02:02:03,655 --> 02:02:06,491
Crazy isn't being broken...
1325
02:02:06,791 --> 02:02:09,994
... or swallowing a dark secret.
1326
02:02:10,495 --> 02:02:12,597
lt's you or me...
1327
02:02:12,831 --> 02:02:14,933
...amplified.
1328
02:02:15,567 --> 02:02:18,169
lf you ever told a lie...
1329
02:02:18,436 --> 02:02:20,338
...and enjoyed it.
1330
02:02:21,840 --> 02:02:26,144
lf you ever wished you
could be a child forever.
1331
02:02:27,479 --> 02:02:29,714
They were not perfect...
1332
02:02:30,181 --> 02:02:32,484
...but they were my friends.
1333
02:02:33,852 --> 02:02:36,087
And by the '7 0s...
1334
02:02:36,321 --> 02:02:38,189
...most of them were out...
1335
02:02:38,456 --> 02:02:40,425
... living lives.
1336
02:02:41,192 --> 02:02:43,261
Some l've seen...
1337
02:02:44,496 --> 02:02:47,032
...some, never again.
1338
02:02:48,366 --> 02:02:51,836
But there isn't a day my heart
doesn't find them.
94603
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