Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
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00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,038
[ Upbeat music playing ]
2
00:00:04,072 --> 00:00:05,073
[ Static ]
3
00:00:05,106 --> 00:00:08,476
Hi, I'm Benji,
and welcome to Hell.
4
00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:12,180
Hey, it could be worse!
[ Laughs ]
5
00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:15,149
I'm kidding.
It could not be worse.
6
00:00:15,183 --> 00:00:19,253
By now, you've met with one
of our rusty whaling hooks...
[ Clink! ]
7
00:00:19,287 --> 00:00:21,089
...and you have questions like,
8
00:00:21,122 --> 00:00:23,357
"What were my sins
that landed me here?"
9
00:00:23,391 --> 00:00:26,460
"What sort of additional
tortures should I expect?"
10
00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:28,662
Maybe you're thinking,
"Is there a way to escape?"
11
00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:32,766
Or "Would someone
please return my intestines
12
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:34,202
into my gaping stomach wound?"
13
00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:35,703
[ Clears throat ]
Is the boring video
14
00:00:35,736 --> 00:00:37,438
a part of the torture?
Shh. Quiet.
15
00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:39,107
We have a lot to cover.
16
00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:41,742
But, luckily,
we have a lot of time.
17
00:00:41,775 --> 00:00:43,311
So let's "Hey, Macarena"
18
00:00:43,344 --> 00:00:45,813
[distorted]
over to the answer forum.
19
00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:47,215
[ Warbling, banging ]
20
00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:49,450
Gary: Hey, what are you doing?
Huh?
21
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:50,851
Aw.
All right.
22
00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:52,686
Okay, everybody hang loose.
23
00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:55,389
I'll be back in 45 minutes.
24
00:00:55,423 --> 00:00:58,192
Well, looks like
that was our only copy.
25
00:00:58,226 --> 00:00:59,593
We'll have to re-shoot it.
26
00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:02,363
I don't know why we have
an orientation video.
27
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:05,499
Seems like it's better
if they're disoriented.
28
00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:08,302
Why don't we make
a disoriental tape?
29
00:01:08,336 --> 00:01:09,637
This video
is dying out there!
30
00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:11,505
They come down to Hell,
they're terrified,
31
00:01:11,539 --> 00:01:14,108
they're in shock,
and then we bore them?!
32
00:01:14,142 --> 00:01:16,610
Let's do something fresh.
33
00:01:16,644 --> 00:01:19,280
Let's do something new.
34
00:01:19,313 --> 00:01:20,881
What do you have in mind?
35
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,851
**
36
00:01:23,884 --> 00:01:25,553
All right, hey, hey.
37
00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:26,887
Whoo, I made it.
Whoo!
38
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,389
New orientation video.
39
00:01:28,422 --> 00:01:31,192
Satan: All right.
Let's see it.
Okay.
40
00:01:31,225 --> 00:01:32,660
Now, before I play this,
41
00:01:32,693 --> 00:01:35,796
I just want you to know
that it's not fully finalized.
42
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:38,799
I'm not sure if this TV
is color-calibrated or not.
43
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:40,334
All right, cool.
Just play it.
44
00:01:40,368 --> 00:01:43,371
Um, just so you know,
also, before I play it,
45
00:01:43,404 --> 00:01:45,239
there's some digital effects
I'm waiting on.
46
00:01:45,273 --> 00:01:46,474
Um, and so
when they come up,
47
00:01:46,507 --> 00:01:47,875
what I'm gonna do
is I'll call them out
48
00:01:47,908 --> 00:01:49,477
and I'll describe them.
Yeah, I get it.
49
00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:52,146
I wasn't sure whether
to letterbox it or not.
50
00:01:52,180 --> 00:01:54,182
And I know --
Play the [bleep] tape!
51
00:01:54,215 --> 00:01:55,349
Here we go.
52
00:01:55,383 --> 00:01:56,217
[ Beep ]
53
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,718
[ Hip-hop beat plays ]
54
00:01:57,751 --> 00:01:58,886
* Straight outta Hades
55
00:01:58,919 --> 00:02:00,888
* Crazy mother... named Satan
56
00:02:00,921 --> 00:02:03,424
* Hit your knees
and start to felatin' *
57
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:05,493
* When you meet me,
you best greet me *
58
00:02:05,526 --> 00:02:07,728
* Or I'll put my horse hoof
up your cheap seat *
59
00:02:07,761 --> 00:02:10,498
[ Warble ]
* Paid time off, there is none
60
00:02:10,531 --> 00:02:12,733
* Health benefits, you get one
61
00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:14,702
* Everyone here
gets to live forever *
62
00:02:14,735 --> 00:02:17,638
* And I'm grating your brain
like a block of cheddar *
63
00:02:17,671 --> 00:02:18,939
Yeah, boyyy.
64
00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:20,208
* Or Gouda
65
00:02:20,241 --> 00:02:23,344
[ Beat continues ]
66
00:02:23,377 --> 00:02:24,778
I had nothing
to do with this.
67
00:02:24,812 --> 00:02:25,846
Satan: You're in it.
What?
68
00:02:25,879 --> 00:02:26,947
You're in it.
Huh?
69
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:28,349
* Straight outta Hades, dawg
70
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:29,717
* You see any ladies?
71
00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:32,220
* William and V.C.'s
the only ones twerkin' *
72
00:02:32,253 --> 00:02:34,388
* So the masturbating spider
is jerkin' *
73
00:02:34,422 --> 00:02:35,456
* Hard
[ Laughs ]
74
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:36,824
* He's the head of HR
75
00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:40,394
This guy is
the dopest mother[bleep]
76
00:02:40,428 --> 00:02:41,762
I've ever met
in my life.
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00:02:41,795 --> 00:02:43,264
I'm a -- I'm a team player.
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00:02:43,297 --> 00:02:44,565
* The commode
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00:02:44,598 --> 00:02:46,334
* That's where your face goes
80
00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:47,868
* When Satan is waiting
to explode with a load *
81
00:02:47,901 --> 00:02:50,538
* No one can save you,
not even Bruce Wayne *
82
00:02:50,571 --> 00:02:53,607
* And if you don't believe me,
why don't you ask Bane *
83
00:02:53,641 --> 00:02:55,676
[ Muffled rapping ]
84
00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:57,278
We got Bane!
85
00:02:57,311 --> 00:02:58,612
[ Muffled rapping
continues ]
Who is this?
86
00:02:58,646 --> 00:03:00,981
Who's this guy with the tubes
coming out of his face?
87
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,383
That's Bane.
88
00:03:02,416 --> 00:03:04,285
That's Batman's
bisexual nemesis.
89
00:03:04,318 --> 00:03:05,986
Yeah, and he may be a little
difficult to understand,
90
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,421
but what he's saying is,
91
00:03:07,455 --> 00:03:08,756
[deep voice]
"He'll be bringing the thunder
92
00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:10,358
down on Boy Wonder.
93
00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:12,860
And then you have
my permission to die."
94
00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:15,563
[ Siren wails ]
[ Clears throat ]
95
00:03:15,596 --> 00:03:17,465
So, what did everybody
think of this?
96
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:18,766
There's like
three more minutes of it.
97
00:03:18,799 --> 00:03:21,602
Okay, we don't -- yeah,
we get -- we get the idea.
98
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:23,404
[ Click, music stops ]
99
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:28,742
I don't understand at all
what Batman...
100
00:03:28,776 --> 00:03:33,381
much less, uh,
a peripheral villain of his
101
00:03:33,414 --> 00:03:35,283
has to do
with our organization.
102
00:03:35,316 --> 00:03:36,617
I can count at least
seven or eight
103
00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:38,752
different licensing issues
we're gonna have --
104
00:03:38,786 --> 00:03:41,455
music, character usage.
105
00:03:41,489 --> 00:03:44,892
I also think it's weird
106
00:03:44,925 --> 00:03:47,861
that the song is
"Straight Outta Hades,"
107
00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:49,797
and this is directed
towards people
108
00:03:49,830 --> 00:03:52,300
who are coming
into Hades!
109
00:03:53,501 --> 00:03:54,735
I thought
it was really dope.
110
00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:56,337
Yeah.
111
00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:58,372
I thought it was great.
I really did.
112
00:03:58,406 --> 00:03:59,840
Gar --
congratulations, Gary!
[ Applause ]
113
00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:02,476
I just did --
it just came out of me.
Wow.
114
00:04:02,510 --> 00:04:04,278
I've never seen
anything like this,
115
00:04:04,312 --> 00:04:06,414
where you -- you take
a famous song,
116
00:04:06,447 --> 00:04:08,015
and then you -- you spoof it,
you know?
117
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:09,683
A spoof.
"Weird" Al Yankovic.
118
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,884
I don't know who that is,
119
00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:13,521
but I think I want all of
our videos done just like that.
120
00:04:13,554 --> 00:04:15,289
Yes.
I completely agree.
121
00:04:15,323 --> 00:04:17,024
No, Benji,
I want Gary in charge
122
00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:19,293
of all internal videos
from now on.
123
00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:21,362
But I run
the video department.
124
00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:22,763
Yeah, not anymore, Benji.
125
00:04:22,796 --> 00:04:24,732
You are going to Rapes.
126
00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,368
Wait a minute.
127
00:04:27,401 --> 00:04:28,469
You like Rapes.
128
00:04:28,502 --> 00:04:30,037
You're going to Hot Liquids.
129
00:04:30,070 --> 00:04:31,372
Congratulations, Gary.
130
00:04:31,405 --> 00:04:32,506
Yeah!
Yeah!
131
00:04:32,540 --> 00:04:33,841
Gary pulls it down!
[ Laughs ]
132
00:04:33,874 --> 00:04:36,644
Pbht! Pbht! Pbht! Pbht!
133
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,846
[ Hip-hop beat plays,
siren wails ]
134
00:04:38,879 --> 00:04:40,714
Gary: * Give it up
[ Keyboard clacking ]
135
00:04:40,748 --> 00:04:41,782
[ Gary beatboxing ]
136
00:04:41,815 --> 00:04:44,051
* Straight outta
Workplace Conflict Resolution *
137
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:45,686
* You better watch
my elocution *
138
00:04:45,719 --> 00:04:47,020
* Or you're gonna be facing
workplace execution *
139
00:04:47,054 --> 00:04:48,389
Ah, what?!
Gary!
140
00:04:48,422 --> 00:04:49,923
I dropped my flow.
Gary!
141
00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:51,392
We're trying to work here!
142
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:54,061
Uh, yeah,
so am I, out here.
143
00:04:54,094 --> 00:04:56,330
I don't know if maybe
you couldn't notice.
144
00:04:56,364 --> 00:04:59,367
And maybe if you watch the
"Straight Outta Workplace
Conflict Resolution" video
145
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:00,701
when I'm done making it,
146
00:05:00,734 --> 00:05:02,436
you'll be able to handle
these kind of situations.
147
00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:03,971
Maybe you should make
148
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:06,440
"Straight Outta Stop
Being an Asshole and
Dress Up Like a Doofus"
149
00:05:06,474 --> 00:05:07,775
and let people work.
Troy.
150
00:05:07,808 --> 00:05:09,710
We're trying to wor--
Troy, walk with me.
151
00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:10,744
Oh, for...
152
00:05:10,778 --> 00:05:11,645
Good energy,
everybody.
153
00:05:11,679 --> 00:05:13,381
All right, I'm gonna need
two like this
154
00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:14,648
and two like this
when we come back.
155
00:05:14,682 --> 00:05:16,083
Tailslate, if you would.
[ Claps ]
156
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:17,551
* Straight outta
summoning snakes *
157
00:05:17,585 --> 00:05:19,086
* Ya gotta do what it takes
158
00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:21,689
* Gotta raise the stakes
when you're summoning snakes *
159
00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:23,591
[ Hip-hop beat continues ]
What are you doing?
Damn it, Mike.
160
00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:25,559
Quit doing the cutaways
to the snakes.
161
00:05:25,593 --> 00:05:27,995
All right, I want you to stick
to the close-up of me.
162
00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:32,099
I thought maybe, uh, we should
eventually get to the snake.
163
00:05:32,132 --> 00:05:33,934
Why don't you turn
that telephone cord
164
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:36,637
that I'm playing with,
obviously like a snake,
into some sort of snake?
165
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:38,539
I was wondering why...
[ Keyboard clacks ]
166
00:05:38,572 --> 00:05:40,874
...you couldn't just actually
summon the snake in the video,
167
00:05:40,908 --> 00:05:43,711
uh, instead of having me
do that with the phone.
168
00:05:43,744 --> 00:05:47,748
I don't have time to watch
a video that I haven't made yet
169
00:05:47,781 --> 00:05:51,985
to learn how to summon snakes,
which I don't know how to do!
170
00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:53,987
Just keep editing
some video.
171
00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:56,457
I tell you out here,
this is "Straight Outta
Making Walls Bleed."
172
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,392
This is the new
hot realness.
173
00:05:58,426 --> 00:05:59,893
* Straight outta
making walls bleed *
174
00:05:59,927 --> 00:06:02,430
* We're about to paint
this joint crimson, indeed *
175
00:06:02,463 --> 00:06:03,597
* Uh-huh
[ Hip-hop beat continues ]
176
00:06:03,631 --> 00:06:05,999
Now, you're going
to digitally add
177
00:06:06,033 --> 00:06:08,536
bleeding walls
into that, right?
178
00:06:08,569 --> 00:06:10,638
Yeah.
Yes, I'm gonna do that.
179
00:06:10,671 --> 00:06:12,606
Every one of these
is "Straight Outta"?
180
00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,141
[ Keyboard clacks ]
[ Scoffs ]
181
00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:16,076
That's what I was saying.
What?
182
00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:17,445
How do you mean?
183
00:06:17,478 --> 00:06:18,746
You could have done
184
00:06:18,779 --> 00:06:20,981
"Satan's Got Racks"...
[ Chuckles ]
185
00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:22,115
...instead of
"Baby's Got" --
186
00:06:22,149 --> 00:06:23,517
like, "Baby's Got Back."
187
00:06:23,551 --> 00:06:24,885
Yeah, that's -- that's
pretty funny.
188
00:06:24,918 --> 00:06:26,086
Yeah.
That's good.
189
00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:27,154
But it's not.
190
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:29,423
I tell you
what's funny, right?
191
00:06:29,457 --> 00:06:30,658
Straight Outta videos!
192
00:06:30,691 --> 00:06:32,526
The Straight Outta brand
is very simple.
193
00:06:32,560 --> 00:06:34,027
It is "straight outta"
194
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:36,864
and then a bunch of words about
different subjects, right,
195
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,599
and the only things
that are the same
196
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:39,933
are the words
"straight outta"
197
00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:43,036
and the melody and the rhymes
for each song --
198
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:44,505
and the beat.
199
00:06:44,538 --> 00:06:46,073
When did you have time
to do all these?
200
00:06:46,106 --> 00:06:47,741
I have not made
any one of these.
201
00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:48,909
I just have the boxes.
202
00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:54,214
And the "Straight Outta How
to R-Repair the Network" video
203
00:06:54,247 --> 00:07:00,821
goes on this whole rigamarole
about R2-D2 and C-T3P.
204
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:01,689
C-3PO.
205
00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:04,892
I just didn't
find any of that helpful.
206
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,794
Your fly is down.
207
00:07:06,827 --> 00:07:08,762
Oh.
Excuse me.
208
00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:10,731
[ Zip ]
[ Hip-hop beat plays ]
209
00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:13,867
* Straight outta understanding
how to log into your E-mail *
210
00:07:13,901 --> 00:07:16,670
* You don't wanna have
an E-mail fail *
211
00:07:16,704 --> 00:07:19,740
* Are you gonna
log onto your E-mail? *
212
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:22,175
* Here's to
logging into E-mail *
213
00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:24,177
Okay, hang on.
Cut, cut, cut, cut!
214
00:07:24,211 --> 00:07:25,546
Did you write these raps?
215
00:07:25,579 --> 00:07:26,980
Yes, these are my rhymes.
216
00:07:27,014 --> 00:07:28,482
Yeah,
of course they rhyme.
217
00:07:28,516 --> 00:07:30,584
It's because you're saying
the same G.D. word, Ted!
218
00:07:30,618 --> 00:07:32,720
"You got to log
into your E-mail.
219
00:07:32,753 --> 00:07:34,822
You're gonna be forced
to eat a whole bunch of kale.
220
00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:37,090
Or you're gonna have to have sex
with a she-male."
221
00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:38,492
You see what I'm saying?
222
00:07:38,526 --> 00:07:39,860
Are we allowed to say
"she-male"?
223
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:41,194
No, Ted, you pig!
224
00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:44,264
Did you not watch
"Straight Outta Workplace
Sensitivity Training"?
225
00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,800
The Force is not with you,
my friend.
226
00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:47,601
Take the buns off!
227
00:07:47,635 --> 00:07:50,237
[ As Yoda ]
A rapper you are not.
228
00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:51,972
[ Normal voice ]
Y'all too white.
229
00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:56,910
E'rybody in this dang room
is too white, but me.
230
00:07:56,944 --> 00:07:59,813
I'm the blackest man
that's ever been.
231
00:07:59,847 --> 00:08:02,750
I'm as black
as Oprah's pocketbook.
232
00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:07,120
Black as
85% Whole Foods dark chocolate!
233
00:08:07,154 --> 00:08:08,656
Let's do this again.
234
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:10,057
Satan:
[ Chuckles ] Gary.
235
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:11,825
You see what
I'm dealing with here?
236
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:13,861
Shit.
Yeah, showbiz, huh?
237
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:14,795
Phugh.
Yeah.
238
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,697
Hey, listen, Gar,
I hate to tell you this,
239
00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:18,732
but I badly need
more of these videos.
240
00:08:18,766 --> 00:08:20,634
Oh, sure thing, B.
How many you need?
241
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:21,735
You know I love to work.
242
00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:23,737
I need
a Straight Outta video
243
00:08:23,771 --> 00:08:25,739
for every letter
of the alphabet.
244
00:08:25,773 --> 00:08:26,840
All 20...?
245
00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:27,975
26...
26.
246
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,209
...uh, of the letters.
247
00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:30,878
Straight Outta A,
Straight Outta B...
248
00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:32,212
You get it.
I want 'em all.
249
00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:33,313
Cool -- cool 'mo B,
absolutely.
250
00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:34,748
All right.
I'm gonna -- yeah.
251
00:08:34,782 --> 00:08:36,149
Dizzy fo' shizzy,
absolutely.
Hit it.
252
00:08:36,183 --> 00:08:37,618
Um, what is the deadline
on all that?
253
00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:38,786
Oh, tomorrow.
I'm gonna screen them
254
00:08:38,819 --> 00:08:40,954
in the auditorium
for everyone.
255
00:08:40,988 --> 00:08:44,291
Do you mind if I ask, like,
why the whole alphabet?
256
00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:46,093
I mind.
257
00:08:46,126 --> 00:08:48,996
[ Hoofs departing ]
258
00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:53,634
[ Gargling ]
259
00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:56,837
[ Hip-hop beat plays ]
260
00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,939
[ Hoarsely ] * Two of these
and the name Jeff *
261
00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:02,042
* And that's my rhyme
about the letter "F" *
262
00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:03,677
Cut!
[ Music stops ]
263
00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:05,646
All right, we need nailed it.
Okay.
264
00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:07,180
All right, everybody, um...
265
00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:08,215
All right, action.
266
00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:09,817
We need action on the other set.
267
00:09:09,850 --> 00:09:11,251
Quiet on this different set.
268
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:12,820
Action on the other set,
though.
269
00:09:12,853 --> 00:09:14,622
All right, so action --
other set.
270
00:09:14,655 --> 00:09:16,957
* Straight outta
the letter "C" *
271
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,627
* It sound like
the letter "D" *
272
00:09:19,660 --> 00:09:21,028
Who's rapping
incoherently?
273
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,062
I'm rapping.
274
00:09:22,095 --> 00:09:23,096
Why are you rapping?
275
00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:24,364
You called action.
276
00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:26,366
I called action
on the other set, V.C.!
277
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:27,935
Oh, I --
All right, yes.
278
00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:30,070
You are wrong, I am right.
[ Coughs ]
279
00:09:30,103 --> 00:09:33,240
Next, we're gonna be doing
the letter "G," as in "ghost."
280
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:34,842
So...
281
00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:36,944
action on
the other-other set.
282
00:09:36,977 --> 00:09:38,946
* It sound like
the letter "C" *
283
00:09:38,979 --> 00:09:40,781
I swear to Christ, V.C.,
I'm gonna split you in half.
284
00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:42,082
* It sound like
the letter "D" *
285
00:09:42,115 --> 00:09:43,316
You are fired!
286
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:45,686
Your -- your old ass
is fired!
287
00:09:45,719 --> 00:09:47,220
Everybody's fired!
288
00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:50,924
You are fired, you are fired,
you are fired, you are fired,
289
00:09:50,958 --> 00:09:54,728
you are fired, you are fired --
everybody's fired!
290
00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:56,630
[ Clatter ]
[ Sobs ]
291
00:09:56,664 --> 00:09:57,931
I'm fired.
292
00:09:57,965 --> 00:10:01,268
Sounds like someone could use
a little help.
293
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,936
I can't do it.
294
00:10:02,970 --> 00:10:04,738
You can't.
295
00:10:04,772 --> 00:10:06,273
But we can.
296
00:10:06,306 --> 00:10:08,709
Okay, everyone,
we're gonna take five.
297
00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:10,944
And when we come back,
we're shooting this live.
298
00:10:10,978 --> 00:10:14,047
No cuts, three cameras --
like a telethon.
299
00:10:14,081 --> 00:10:15,849
And we need to repair
your instrument.
300
00:10:15,883 --> 00:10:18,686
I need some hot tea
with lemon -- ASAP!
301
00:10:18,719 --> 00:10:20,253
We ain't got no lemons
down here.
302
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:24,291
There's a whole box of lemons
over by Paper Cuts.
303
00:10:24,324 --> 00:10:25,993
[ Hip-hop beat playing ]
304
00:10:26,026 --> 00:10:27,795
Ooh!
Ooh! Ha! Ha!
305
00:10:27,828 --> 00:10:29,429
You guys are in for a show.
[ Chuckles ]
306
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,098
[ Satan clears throat ]
307
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:32,232
Where's everybody else?
308
00:10:32,265 --> 00:10:34,401
Hmm?
Oh, no, it's just you two.
309
00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:36,003
Let's get 'em strapped in.
310
00:10:36,036 --> 00:10:37,204
Nice.
311
00:10:37,237 --> 00:10:38,271
I like the packaging.
312
00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:39,907
Oh.
Aw, shucks.
313
00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:41,274
Ow!
314
00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:42,943
[ Squish ]
315
00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:44,745
I've got some, uh,
eye drops here
316
00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:47,014
in case you guys need
a little moisture.
317
00:10:47,047 --> 00:10:48,749
[ Muffled ] I can't
reach the eye droppers.
318
00:10:48,782 --> 00:10:51,051
And, uh, we'll see you guys
in, like, 50 years.
319
00:10:52,019 --> 00:10:53,787
* Straight outta the alphabet
320
00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:54,988
* That's the name
of this cassette *
321
00:10:55,022 --> 00:10:56,256
* Can I buy a vowel?
322
00:10:56,289 --> 00:10:57,891
* You know you got five
323
00:10:57,925 --> 00:11:00,928
* Unless you want to count
sometimes "Y" *
324
00:11:00,961 --> 00:11:02,429
* As in the question...
325
00:11:02,462 --> 00:11:04,197
You know what is
most surprising of all?
326
00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:05,232
What?
327
00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:07,434
I sound black.
328
00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:08,902
You do.
I really sound black.
329
00:11:08,936 --> 00:11:10,871
If I could close my eyes,
330
00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:14,808
I would be like,
"Is that Harley Davidson Jr.?"
331
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,309
I can't think of a black man's
name right now,
332
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:17,745
I'm in too much pain.
24119
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