Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:04,517
Subtitles by explosiveskull
2
00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:07,423
(THUNDER CRASHING)
3
00:00:19,635 --> 00:00:20,533
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
4
00:00:20,535 --> 00:00:23,406
Hold on, hold on,
hold on, hold on.
5
00:00:25,507 --> 00:00:27,140
(THUNDER CRASHING)
6
00:00:27,142 --> 00:00:30,110
For those of you who
don't go to the movies
7
00:00:30,112 --> 00:00:32,514
or to the theater
or watch television,
8
00:00:33,514 --> 00:00:35,582
let me introduce myself.
9
00:00:35,584 --> 00:00:38,485
My name is Peter O'Toole.
10
00:00:38,487 --> 00:00:41,121
(GUITAR STRING TWANGS)
11
00:00:41,123 --> 00:00:42,090
Quite.
12
00:00:43,492 --> 00:00:46,525
For one reason or another,
the motion picture
13
00:00:46,527 --> 00:00:50,629
you are about to watch is
not very clear in parts.
14
00:00:50,631 --> 00:00:53,132
As a matter of fact, it
was made to demonstrate
15
00:00:53,134 --> 00:00:55,469
how not to make a motion picture
16
00:00:55,471 --> 00:00:58,708
and at the same time
win an Academy Award.
17
00:01:00,042 --> 00:01:02,074
In fact, Solomon
at the front office
18
00:01:02,076 --> 00:01:03,643
has thought the occasional word
19
00:01:03,645 --> 00:01:06,579
from me might clarify the plot
20
00:01:06,581 --> 00:01:10,216
and any other vague
portions of the film.
21
00:01:10,218 --> 00:01:12,587
In my view, fat chance.
22
00:01:14,155 --> 00:01:17,592
Still, if you're sitting
comfortably, let us begin.
23
00:01:21,497 --> 00:01:24,598
(THUNDER CRASHING)
24
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:27,169
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
25
00:01:35,911 --> 00:01:39,578
(CRICKETS CHIRPING)
26
00:01:39,580 --> 00:01:42,314
(WOMAN SCREECHING)
27
00:01:42,316 --> 00:01:43,952
(BLUEGRASS MUSIC)
28
00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:56,563
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
this is the beginning
29
00:01:56,565 --> 00:01:59,266
of the journey in
which two brothers,
30
00:01:59,268 --> 00:02:01,471
Oliver and Stanley Rosenblum,
31
00:02:02,538 --> 00:02:05,041
make their way to a mythical
place called El Dorado,
32
00:02:07,175 --> 00:02:10,743
as depicted in the poem
by Edgar Allan Poe.
33
00:02:10,745 --> 00:02:15,548
But first, they have to appear
at the Las Vegas amphitheater
34
00:02:15,550 --> 00:02:17,951
for a very strange group.
35
00:02:17,953 --> 00:02:19,852
Well I hardly know
how to describe.
36
00:02:19,854 --> 00:02:20,923
Whatever, you'll see.
37
00:02:23,792 --> 00:02:26,229
(JAZZ MUSIC)
38
00:02:29,298 --> 00:02:30,630
Good evening
ladies and gentlemen,
39
00:02:30,632 --> 00:02:32,197
and welcome to the
Nevada Amphitheater
40
00:02:32,199 --> 00:02:33,666
in downtown Las Vegas.
41
00:02:33,668 --> 00:02:37,036
Well here it is the
late '70s going on 1985.
42
00:02:37,038 --> 00:02:38,672
You know most of the
music we hear today
43
00:02:38,674 --> 00:02:41,708
is nothing more than
pre-programmed electronic disco.
44
00:02:41,710 --> 00:02:43,275
We very rarely get
a chance to hear
45
00:02:43,277 --> 00:02:45,879
master blues men practicing
their craft anymore.
46
00:02:45,881 --> 00:02:48,013
By the year 2020, the
music known as the blues
47
00:02:48,015 --> 00:02:50,249
will only exist in the
classical record department
48
00:02:50,251 --> 00:02:51,718
of your local library.
49
00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:53,153
So while we still can,
50
00:02:53,155 --> 00:02:55,721
please welcome from Rock
Island, Illinois the blues music
51
00:02:55,723 --> 00:02:57,592
of Oliver and Stanley Rosenblum:
52
00:02:58,727 --> 00:03:00,292
The Jews brothers.
53
00:03:00,294 --> 00:03:03,630
(PIANO GLISSANDO)
54
00:03:03,632 --> 00:03:05,098
GROUP: Shit!
55
00:03:05,100 --> 00:03:07,367
Get to the Jew boys!
56
00:03:07,369 --> 00:03:09,205
CROWD: Sieg Heil!
57
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:14,342
(MAN YELLING)
58
00:03:18,714 --> 00:03:21,217
(CAR REVVING)
59
00:03:23,685 --> 00:03:24,316
(GUNS FIRING)
60
00:03:24,318 --> 00:03:26,988
(MEN YELLING)
61
00:03:32,761 --> 00:03:35,330
(CARS REVVING)
62
00:03:36,632 --> 00:03:41,166
("RIDE OF THE VALKYRIES"
BY RICHARD WAGNUR)
63
00:03:41,168 --> 00:03:43,636
I want those Jews
brothers roasting
64
00:03:43,638 --> 00:03:45,672
on a German spit, yeah.
65
00:03:45,674 --> 00:03:47,641
This is America
land of the free,
66
00:03:47,643 --> 00:03:50,275
and I want them
free and over easy.
67
00:03:50,277 --> 00:03:52,715
(LAUGHING)
68
00:03:58,085 --> 00:03:59,351
(AIR FLAPPING)
69
00:03:59,353 --> 00:04:01,921
Why are we performing
to neo-Nazis, Oliver?
70
00:04:01,923 --> 00:04:04,423
OLIVER: It was supposed
to be a bar mitzvah, Stanley.
71
00:04:04,425 --> 00:04:05,595
Whose?
72
00:04:07,128 --> 00:04:10,362
Do you think they're
firing real bullets at us?
73
00:04:10,364 --> 00:04:12,999
Does that answer
your question?
74
00:04:13,001 --> 00:04:15,938
(TIRES SCREECHING)
75
00:04:23,345 --> 00:04:25,847
(MAN YELLING)
76
00:04:28,984 --> 00:04:31,320
(MAN YELLING)
77
00:04:36,357 --> 00:04:38,360
MAN: I've been shot!
78
00:04:40,195 --> 00:04:41,761
Are we going to
the casino, Oliver?
79
00:04:41,763 --> 00:04:42,896
With what?
80
00:04:42,898 --> 00:04:44,330
Didn't we get paid
from the last gig?
81
00:04:44,332 --> 00:04:45,999
I don't think any
California neo-Nazi party
82
00:04:46,001 --> 00:04:48,100
were interested in paying
for any form of entertainment
83
00:04:48,102 --> 00:04:50,335
from two Jewish entertainers,
Stanley, do you?
84
00:04:50,337 --> 00:04:52,004
Maybe not, Ollie.
85
00:04:52,006 --> 00:04:54,340
(MAN MUMBLING)
86
00:04:54,342 --> 00:04:56,342
(BLOWS)
87
00:04:56,344 --> 00:04:59,179
(CHUCKLING)
88
00:04:59,181 --> 00:05:01,417
Wanna have some fun, huh?
89
00:05:02,350 --> 00:05:05,287
(CAR DOOR SLAMMING)
90
00:05:07,455 --> 00:05:10,290
(CHANGE JINGLING)
91
00:05:10,292 --> 00:05:12,895
(BELL DINGING)
92
00:05:17,933 --> 00:05:19,432
(PHONE RINGING)
93
00:05:19,434 --> 00:05:22,501
(MAN LAUGHING MANICALLY)
94
00:05:22,503 --> 00:05:23,836
Hello!
95
00:05:23,838 --> 00:05:26,773
JJ Hamilton, an
agency for the, hello?
96
00:05:26,775 --> 00:05:27,973
Hello!
97
00:05:27,975 --> 00:05:29,477
This can't be a prank
phone call, I (LAUGHS).
98
00:05:33,448 --> 00:05:34,747
Hello?
99
00:05:34,749 --> 00:05:36,949
JJ Hamilton, Agency
for Gifted People!
100
00:05:36,951 --> 00:05:38,852
So what about people
without a bullet proof vest?
101
00:05:38,854 --> 00:05:40,252
What?
102
00:05:40,254 --> 00:05:42,088
JJ, can you hear me?
103
00:05:42,090 --> 00:05:43,556
Yeah, I can hear you.
104
00:05:43,558 --> 00:05:44,456
Who is that?
105
00:05:44,458 --> 00:05:46,191
It's Oliver Rosenblum.
106
00:05:46,193 --> 00:05:47,427
- Who?
- Oliver Rosenblum.
107
00:05:47,429 --> 00:05:49,028
From the Jews brothers.
108
00:05:49,030 --> 00:05:50,028
Oliver!
109
00:05:50,030 --> 00:05:51,864
Oliver, how's my
favorite client?
110
00:05:51,866 --> 00:05:53,165
How's the show going?
111
00:05:53,167 --> 00:05:55,201
JJ, we were fired at.
112
00:05:55,203 --> 00:05:56,502
No problem, don't worry.
113
00:05:56,504 --> 00:05:58,872
Even the best of 'em get
fired once and a while.
114
00:05:58,874 --> 00:06:00,239
- It happens.
- No, JJ.
115
00:06:00,241 --> 00:06:01,775
We were shot at.
116
00:06:01,777 --> 00:06:02,775
Shot at?
117
00:06:02,777 --> 00:06:04,410
What kind of bat
mitzvah is this?
118
00:06:04,412 --> 00:06:05,511
There was no bat mitzvah, JJ.
119
00:06:05,513 --> 00:06:07,179
The roasting these
guys wanted to do
120
00:06:07,181 --> 00:06:08,514
was of me and Stan.
121
00:06:08,516 --> 00:06:09,314
(JJ MUTTERING)
122
00:06:09,316 --> 00:06:10,249
(PHONE RINGING)
123
00:06:10,251 --> 00:06:11,384
Whoa, hold on there, Oliver.
124
00:06:11,386 --> 00:06:12,552
I got another call.
125
00:06:12,554 --> 00:06:14,987
JJ, we need to
get some work quick.
126
00:06:14,989 --> 00:06:16,790
Just a second, okay?
127
00:06:16,792 --> 00:06:19,191
Just stay on the line,
okay, stay on the line.
128
00:06:19,193 --> 00:06:21,393
I'm very busy, but I
always have time for you.
129
00:06:21,395 --> 00:06:23,295
Just stay on the line.
130
00:06:23,297 --> 00:06:25,465
Hello, hello, hello!
131
00:06:25,467 --> 00:06:27,566
Agency for the Stars.
132
00:06:27,568 --> 00:06:30,270
JJ, is that you, you asshole?
133
00:06:30,272 --> 00:06:31,336
What's wrong, Leslie?
134
00:06:31,338 --> 00:06:32,437
What's wrong?
135
00:06:32,439 --> 00:06:34,506
You've done it again.
136
00:06:34,508 --> 00:06:35,809
I thought you were sending me
137
00:06:35,811 --> 00:06:37,910
to some kinky Nazi
party convention.
138
00:06:37,912 --> 00:06:40,246
I get there and this guy
starts giving me shit
139
00:06:40,248 --> 00:06:42,816
because I tossed my
G-string into the fountain,
140
00:06:42,818 --> 00:06:45,951
the same time as they dip a
baby's head into the basin.
141
00:06:45,953 --> 00:06:48,321
How did I know it
was a bat mitzvah?
142
00:06:48,323 --> 00:06:50,189
I thought the stage was done
for something a little hinky,
143
00:06:50,191 --> 00:06:52,424
a bit of water sports maybe.
144
00:06:52,426 --> 00:06:53,559
I don't know about bat mitzvahs.
145
00:06:53,561 --> 00:06:55,828
I'm a stripper, JJ.
146
00:06:55,830 --> 00:06:57,963
They wanted a Blues
Brothers tribute act.
147
00:06:57,965 --> 00:06:59,264
A Jewish which Blues Brothers,
148
00:06:59,266 --> 00:07:02,035
like those other
assholes you represent?
149
00:07:02,037 --> 00:07:05,441
Leslie, now Stanley and Oliver
are professional musicians.
150
00:07:06,941 --> 00:07:09,174
Well it's my pink pussy
that makes you the money.
151
00:07:09,176 --> 00:07:10,212
Remember that, JJ.
152
00:07:11,378 --> 00:07:13,312
How am I gonna sing
the blues with my tits?
153
00:07:13,314 --> 00:07:14,547
Hold on, Lesllie.
154
00:07:14,549 --> 00:07:16,148
Maybe I can find
ya something else.
155
00:07:16,150 --> 00:07:17,917
(LAUGHING)
That's it!
156
00:07:17,919 --> 00:07:20,153
I think I found the
ideal gig for both of ya.
157
00:07:20,155 --> 00:07:22,622
They want a stripper and a band,
158
00:07:22,624 --> 00:07:23,989
and I think you can even take
159
00:07:23,991 --> 00:07:25,490
your half-wit boyfriend with ya.
160
00:07:25,492 --> 00:07:27,559
Now listen, listen
hard and listen quick.
161
00:07:27,561 --> 00:07:31,030
I want you to make a
left on route 66, okay?
162
00:07:31,032 --> 00:07:33,198
That's right near Boon's
Diner and Gas Station,
163
00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:35,201
but don't be late, they
want you for dinner.
164
00:07:35,203 --> 00:07:36,501
Okay, Leslie, gotta go.
165
00:07:36,503 --> 00:07:37,569
Bye bye, bye bye.
166
00:07:37,571 --> 00:07:38,403
(JJ MAKING KISSY NOISES)
167
00:07:38,405 --> 00:07:39,240
- Mwah!
- JJ!
168
00:07:40,107 --> 00:07:41,609
Yeah, Oliver, Oliver.
169
00:07:42,544 --> 00:07:43,946
Oliver, my boy.
170
00:07:44,946 --> 00:07:46,379
I don't know how you did it,
171
00:07:46,381 --> 00:07:49,415
but somehow you got mixed
up at Leslie's show.
172
00:07:49,417 --> 00:07:50,549
Well, I didn't
make the booking.
173
00:07:50,551 --> 00:07:52,417
No, no you didn't.
174
00:07:52,419 --> 00:07:54,153
But I think I got a
winner for ya here.
175
00:07:54,155 --> 00:07:55,590
Are you sure this time?
176
00:07:56,290 --> 00:07:57,590
Would I lie to ya, Ollie?
177
00:07:57,592 --> 00:07:59,492
Come on, I got you covered.
178
00:07:59,494 --> 00:08:02,194
It's the same show as
Leslie, different night.
179
00:08:02,196 --> 00:08:04,532
Okay, take down the details.
180
00:08:05,667 --> 00:08:09,335
So, as Oliver and
Stanley get the address
181
00:08:09,337 --> 00:08:12,071
to their next who in El Dorado,
182
00:08:12,073 --> 00:08:15,908
unknown to them, someone else
who will cross their path
183
00:08:15,910 --> 00:08:20,112
is making a surprise
return visit to her husband
184
00:08:20,114 --> 00:08:24,650
on the other side of town
at a strip club called
185
00:08:24,652 --> 00:08:26,455
the Vertical Smile.
186
00:08:27,989 --> 00:08:32,994
Yeah, this is what you
call matrimonial bliss.
187
00:08:34,162 --> 00:08:35,631
You better come
and do that now.
188
00:08:37,398 --> 00:08:38,631
What's going on?
189
00:08:38,633 --> 00:08:39,535
Who is she, Roy?
190
00:08:40,601 --> 00:08:42,470
What are you
talking about, Darlin?
191
00:08:44,705 --> 00:08:45,874
Get up.
192
00:08:49,109 --> 00:08:52,214
You'll need that to take the
taste away before you leave.
193
00:08:55,517 --> 00:08:57,583
Ah, sweetie pie.
194
00:08:57,585 --> 00:09:00,285
It was only a
slight indiscretion.
195
00:09:00,287 --> 00:09:01,123
Come back!
196
00:09:04,258 --> 00:09:06,626
Meanwhile the boys are finding
197
00:09:06,628 --> 00:09:09,661
that getting to El
Dorado is not easy,
198
00:09:09,663 --> 00:09:14,232
even after getting shot at
by neo-Nazis and ex-wives.
199
00:09:14,234 --> 00:09:17,270
So the question is,
what else can happen?
200
00:09:17,272 --> 00:09:19,005
- (POPPING)
- What the hell was that?
201
00:09:19,007 --> 00:09:20,305
OLIVER: We have a flat.
202
00:09:20,307 --> 00:09:21,240
STANLEY: What, again?
203
00:09:21,242 --> 00:09:24,079
(WHIMSICAL MUSIC)
204
00:09:34,556 --> 00:09:37,490
Now we have the scene
where the spurned wife
205
00:09:37,492 --> 00:09:41,361
meets our heroes down
that dusty back road
206
00:09:41,363 --> 00:09:43,663
leading to El Dorado.
207
00:09:43,665 --> 00:09:46,735
Is she the good
Samaritan they need?
208
00:09:49,704 --> 00:09:51,069
(SQUEAKING)
209
00:09:51,071 --> 00:09:52,273
STANLEY: Ow!
210
00:09:53,675 --> 00:09:56,011
(WHISTLING)
211
00:10:20,634 --> 00:10:23,138
(WHISTLING)
212
00:10:24,172 --> 00:10:27,008
(WHIMSICAL MUSIC)
213
00:10:55,135 --> 00:10:56,836
Where the hell are you going?
214
00:10:56,838 --> 00:10:58,374
I think I can see something?
215
00:11:00,808 --> 00:11:03,711
(OMINOUS CRESCENDO)
216
00:11:18,759 --> 00:11:21,763
(MEN PASSING GAS)
217
00:11:35,176 --> 00:11:36,409
Hoo!
218
00:11:36,411 --> 00:11:39,478
Who was eating them
goddamned beans again?
219
00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:42,316
(WOMAN CHUCKLING)
220
00:11:46,588 --> 00:11:49,291
(SHOES SCUFFING)
221
00:11:51,625 --> 00:11:52,791
So where the
hell have you been?
222
00:11:52,793 --> 00:11:54,861
I think I found some help.
223
00:11:54,863 --> 00:11:55,862
Where?
224
00:11:55,864 --> 00:11:56,728
There, in the desert.
225
00:11:56,730 --> 00:11:58,131
There's about 50 of them.
226
00:11:58,133 --> 00:12:00,532
They look like good ole boys.
227
00:12:00,534 --> 00:12:02,200
We don't need
any help, Stanley.
228
00:12:02,202 --> 00:12:03,805
The car's fixed; let's go.
229
00:12:05,406 --> 00:12:08,410
(ENGINE SPUTTERING)
230
00:12:12,614 --> 00:12:13,679
Shit.
231
00:12:13,681 --> 00:12:14,881
Well, what's wrong, Ollie?
232
00:12:14,883 --> 00:12:17,349
We've ran out of gas.
233
00:12:17,851 --> 00:12:20,152
Looks like we've got a
hole in our tank, Stanley.
234
00:12:20,154 --> 00:12:22,420
I can fix it, but we
ain't got any gas.
235
00:12:22,422 --> 00:12:23,892
Well, what are we gonna do?
236
00:12:25,159 --> 00:12:27,160
You better show me where
those good ole boys are.
237
00:12:27,162 --> 00:12:28,397
I just hope we don't get raped.
238
00:12:33,401 --> 00:12:34,867
Well they look all right.
239
00:12:34,869 --> 00:12:36,839
Well looks can be
deceiving, Stanley.
240
00:12:38,605 --> 00:12:40,609
They sure can, boys.
241
00:12:44,811 --> 00:12:47,246
What are these dudes wearing?
242
00:12:47,248 --> 00:12:49,549
Are they supposed
to be undertakers?
243
00:12:49,551 --> 00:12:51,817
We're the Jews Brothers.
244
00:12:51,819 --> 00:12:53,319
Jews Brothers?
245
00:12:53,321 --> 00:12:56,856
Shit, look more like
the ugly brothers to me.
246
00:12:56,858 --> 00:12:59,992
You make fun of me,
you ugly son of a bitch?
247
00:12:59,994 --> 00:13:03,462
My brother will whip your ass.
248
00:13:03,464 --> 00:13:04,796
Is that a fact?
249
00:13:04,798 --> 00:13:06,766
He's speaking for himself.
250
00:13:06,768 --> 00:13:08,867
That's not what
short-stop said,
251
00:13:08,869 --> 00:13:10,402
is it short-stop?
252
00:13:10,404 --> 00:13:11,603
Let me have him.
253
00:13:11,605 --> 00:13:14,740
I could do with the exercise.
254
00:13:14,742 --> 00:13:16,675
(LAUGHING WICKEDLY)
255
00:13:16,677 --> 00:13:18,813
- I'm a lover, not a fighter.
- Good!
256
00:13:20,380 --> 00:13:24,916
You'll fuck first, then you
can fight for your life.
257
00:13:24,918 --> 00:13:25,785
(HONKING)
258
00:13:25,787 --> 00:13:28,721
- Strip, big boy.
- What?
259
00:13:28,723 --> 00:13:29,921
You heard the lady.
260
00:13:29,923 --> 00:13:31,656
Get your duds off.
261
00:13:31,658 --> 00:13:33,928
(ROCK MUSIC)
262
00:15:12,726 --> 00:15:14,395
You got off lightly, stranger.
263
00:15:15,562 --> 00:15:17,063
But remember we
don't wanna see you
264
00:15:17,065 --> 00:15:17,963
around these parts again.
265
00:15:17,965 --> 00:15:19,700
You understand?
266
00:15:21,835 --> 00:15:25,574
(MOTORCYCLE ENGINE RUMBLING)
267
00:15:39,686 --> 00:15:40,920
Yo, Stanley.
268
00:15:40,922 --> 00:15:42,454
Don't drop rubbish on the floor.
269
00:15:42,456 --> 00:15:43,859
Aren't we in enough trouble?
270
00:15:48,995 --> 00:15:51,030
WOMAN: Are you guys lost?
271
00:15:51,032 --> 00:15:52,030
Well, we've been kidnapped.
272
00:15:52,032 --> 00:15:52,964
Kidnapped?
273
00:15:52,966 --> 00:15:54,635
Yeah, it's a long story.
274
00:15:55,736 --> 00:15:57,035
Could you give us a lift?
275
00:15:57,037 --> 00:15:59,104
- Where to?
- About 20 miles that way.
276
00:15:59,106 --> 00:16:00,705
Sure can, why
don't you get on in.
277
00:16:00,707 --> 00:16:03,044
(TWANGY MUSIC)
278
00:16:13,620 --> 00:16:15,854
You boys all
ready for the feast?
279
00:16:15,856 --> 00:16:17,790
Sure am, Mayor.
280
00:16:17,792 --> 00:16:18,958
- Sure am.
- Very nice, Tommy.
281
00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:20,659
What you got there?
282
00:16:20,661 --> 00:16:22,428
Don't hide it, don't hide it.
283
00:16:22,430 --> 00:16:23,728
It's nipples, sure enough.
284
00:16:23,730 --> 00:16:25,964
I like to suck on a
teat now and then.
285
00:16:25,966 --> 00:16:26,998
(GIGGLES)
286
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,733
Hmm, very tasty.
287
00:16:28,735 --> 00:16:30,571
Very tasty, isn't
that right, Lemmas?
288
00:16:32,105 --> 00:16:34,173
But how do you know
they're female?
289
00:16:34,175 --> 00:16:36,442
They're the ones
without the hair attached,
290
00:16:36,444 --> 00:16:37,675
can't you tell?
291
00:16:37,677 --> 00:16:38,777
(TOMMY GIGGLES)
292
00:16:38,779 --> 00:16:39,612
Well said, Tommy.
293
00:16:39,614 --> 00:16:40,813
Very well said.
294
00:16:40,815 --> 00:16:43,149
I do like the taste
of shortbreads.
295
00:16:43,151 --> 00:16:46,017
Can't beat the sound of
that plop in your mouth
296
00:16:46,019 --> 00:16:48,087
when you bite in that ball.
297
00:16:48,089 --> 00:16:49,421
(CHUCKLES)
298
00:16:49,423 --> 00:16:50,925
Delicious, eh Lemmas?
299
00:16:52,192 --> 00:16:54,727
Look, all ready
for the festival.
300
00:16:54,729 --> 00:16:56,728
(TOMMY LAUGHING)
301
00:16:56,730 --> 00:16:57,997
You got a nice
little something
302
00:16:57,999 --> 00:17:00,402
I could take home for my
dinner tonight, Lemmas?
303
00:17:05,005 --> 00:17:05,840
Hold on.
304
00:17:12,513 --> 00:17:14,146
What's your fancy, Mayor?
305
00:17:14,148 --> 00:17:16,147
I bit kinder, you
know how Ma Louise
306
00:17:16,149 --> 00:17:19,018
likes a nice bit of
lean breast, no fat.
307
00:17:19,020 --> 00:17:19,921
Coming right up.
308
00:17:20,788 --> 00:17:23,489
(WOMAN GROANING)
309
00:17:23,491 --> 00:17:26,128
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
310
00:17:27,128 --> 00:17:29,398
She does carry on
a bit, don't she?
311
00:17:30,831 --> 00:17:33,467
(TWANGY MUSIC)
312
00:17:44,212 --> 00:17:45,144
♪ Dressed in black ♪
313
00:17:45,146 --> 00:17:46,110
♪ Looking fine ♪
314
00:17:46,112 --> 00:17:48,681
♪ And walking real smooth ♪
315
00:17:48,683 --> 00:17:49,581
♪ On the town ♪
316
00:17:49,583 --> 00:17:50,782
♪ On the prowl ♪
317
00:17:50,784 --> 00:17:53,184
♪ No way they could lose ♪
318
00:17:53,186 --> 00:17:54,185
♪ Here they go ♪
319
00:17:54,187 --> 00:17:55,521
♪ On the way ♪
320
00:17:55,523 --> 00:17:57,755
♪ You better stay clear ♪
321
00:17:57,757 --> 00:17:58,924
♪ Dressed in black ♪
322
00:17:58,926 --> 00:17:59,992
♪ Looking fine ♪
323
00:17:59,994 --> 00:18:02,728
♪ Now here comes the fear ♪
324
00:18:02,730 --> 00:18:04,530
♪ Here they go, on their way ♪
325
00:18:04,532 --> 00:18:06,932
♪ You'd better stay clear ♪
326
00:18:06,934 --> 00:18:08,067
♪ Dressed in black ♪
327
00:18:08,069 --> 00:18:09,134
♪ Looking fine ♪
328
00:18:09,136 --> 00:18:11,569
♪ Now here comes the fear ♪
329
00:18:11,571 --> 00:18:14,443
♪ Dressed in black ♪
330
00:18:34,128 --> 00:18:36,531
(JAZZ MUSIC)
331
00:18:41,034 --> 00:18:43,601
(PHONE RINGING)
332
00:18:43,603 --> 00:18:44,970
Darling!
333
00:18:44,972 --> 00:18:49,140
Nothing was happening, I swear.
334
00:18:49,142 --> 00:18:52,043
Why would I want
anybody but you?
335
00:18:52,045 --> 00:18:55,981
I can see naked girls
any day of the week,
336
00:18:55,983 --> 00:18:58,220
but it's you that makes
me hard, sweet pea.
337
00:18:59,853 --> 00:19:01,153
Come back.
338
00:19:01,155 --> 00:19:02,523
I wanna give you something.
339
00:19:03,791 --> 00:19:05,624
Please come back.
340
00:19:05,626 --> 00:19:06,291
Ah, don't beg.
341
00:19:06,293 --> 00:19:07,161
It sounds pitiful.
342
00:19:08,763 --> 00:19:10,698
At least let me remember
you the way that you are,
343
00:19:11,565 --> 00:19:13,000
a sniveling little rat.
344
00:19:15,136 --> 00:19:16,638
Oh, and by the way sweetheart.
345
00:19:17,972 --> 00:19:20,242
Do you remember that suitcase
you left in the loft?
346
00:19:21,809 --> 00:19:23,809
What suitcase?
347
00:19:23,811 --> 00:19:25,644
Oh, you know darling.
348
00:19:25,646 --> 00:19:27,279
The nice little silver
one in the cupboard
349
00:19:27,281 --> 00:19:29,315
with all the money in it.
350
00:19:29,317 --> 00:19:30,715
Why don't we call it a payoff
351
00:19:30,717 --> 00:19:32,186
for all the years
that I gave you?
352
00:19:33,286 --> 00:19:34,955
Oh, and by the way, Roy.
353
00:19:35,956 --> 00:19:37,191
Goodbye, sweetheart.
354
00:19:46,833 --> 00:19:49,300
(ROY SCREAMING)
355
00:19:49,302 --> 00:19:50,234
(TOMMY GIGGLING)
356
00:19:50,236 --> 00:19:51,238
You want something, Missy?
357
00:19:52,907 --> 00:19:54,306
Fill up my baby, laughing boy,
358
00:19:54,308 --> 00:19:56,107
and check under
the hood, will you?
359
00:19:56,109 --> 00:19:57,111
Will do.
360
00:19:58,311 --> 00:20:00,178
Is there a packet
of cigarettes there?
361
00:20:00,180 --> 00:20:03,281
Just as soon as I've
sorted out your car.
362
00:20:03,283 --> 00:20:04,282
Great.
363
00:20:04,284 --> 00:20:05,250
You got a wash room?
364
00:20:05,252 --> 00:20:06,751
Out back, wash basin, too.
365
00:20:06,753 --> 00:20:09,253
To cool off in all this heat.
366
00:20:09,255 --> 00:20:11,993
(TOMMY GIGGLING)
367
00:20:17,665 --> 00:20:19,834
See you got a pussy wagon.
368
00:20:20,701 --> 00:20:21,367
(WATER DRIPPING)
369
00:20:21,369 --> 00:20:22,434
(ELECTRICITY HUMMING)
370
00:20:22,436 --> 00:20:24,339
Oh god, what's that smell?
371
00:20:27,241 --> 00:20:28,674
That'll fuck her chances
372
00:20:28,676 --> 00:20:32,310
of getting out of
Death Valley now.
373
00:20:32,312 --> 00:20:34,379
(GIGGLING)
374
00:20:34,381 --> 00:20:35,947
(ELECTRICITY HUMMING)
375
00:20:35,949 --> 00:20:38,686
(WATER DRIPPING)
376
00:20:40,987 --> 00:20:41,855
Ugh, god.
377
00:20:43,323 --> 00:20:46,293
(CRICKETS CHIRPING)
378
00:20:50,798 --> 00:20:54,032
(ELECTRICITY HUMMING)
379
00:20:54,034 --> 00:20:56,737
(WATER DRIPPING)
380
00:20:58,171 --> 00:21:01,041
(FOREBODING MUSIC)
381
00:21:14,421 --> 00:21:15,421
(JESSICA SCREAMING)
382
00:21:15,423 --> 00:21:18,991
(TOMMY LAUGHING MANICALLY)
383
00:21:18,993 --> 00:21:21,830
(BLUEGRASS MUSIC)
384
00:21:36,744 --> 00:21:39,278
Meanwhile, back at the
front of the gas station,
385
00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:42,114
Oliver and Stanley
arrive trying to find
386
00:21:42,116 --> 00:21:45,353
the town of El Dorado and
a dentist for Stanley.
387
00:21:46,352 --> 00:21:48,322
What they really need is a map.
388
00:21:50,824 --> 00:21:53,992
(TWANGY MUSIC)
389
00:21:53,994 --> 00:21:55,397
Anyone at home?
390
00:21:56,830 --> 00:21:59,234
Yo, I said is anyone at home?
391
00:22:00,301 --> 00:22:01,336
Maybe we should go?
392
00:22:02,736 --> 00:22:04,168
Go where, Stanley?
393
00:22:04,170 --> 00:22:06,437
We're lost, unless you
know the way to El Dorado?
394
00:22:06,439 --> 00:22:07,940
No.
395
00:22:07,942 --> 00:22:10,309
Stanley, if you don't
know and I don't know,
396
00:22:10,311 --> 00:22:12,310
maybe we should ask
someone who does,
397
00:22:12,312 --> 00:22:13,345
you know what I mean?
398
00:22:13,347 --> 00:22:14,349
Yeah.
399
00:22:17,818 --> 00:22:20,388
Hey, it's the
Soggy Bottom Boys.
400
00:22:22,055 --> 00:22:23,955
The Soggy Bottom Boys shit.
401
00:22:23,957 --> 00:22:26,290
We're the Jews Brothers
from Chicago, Illinois,
402
00:22:26,292 --> 00:22:29,228
and we're looking for the
town called El Dorado, mister.
403
00:22:29,230 --> 00:22:30,995
You don't know
the way, do you?
404
00:22:30,997 --> 00:22:31,930
You bet.
405
00:22:31,932 --> 00:22:33,464
I was born and bred there.
406
00:22:33,466 --> 00:22:35,466
El Dorado, no town like it.
407
00:22:35,468 --> 00:22:40,475
Anyway, it says here you're
the Soggy Bottom Boys.
408
00:22:43,010 --> 00:22:46,377
Now, Sir, do we look like
the Soggy Bottom Boys to you?
409
00:22:46,379 --> 00:22:47,215
You do there.
410
00:22:52,852 --> 00:22:54,488
I think we need
a new agent, Ollie.
411
00:23:00,895 --> 00:23:02,461
Do you have a restroom?
412
00:23:02,463 --> 00:23:03,427
What?
413
00:23:03,429 --> 00:23:05,597
I need to have
a pee, you know.
414
00:23:05,599 --> 00:23:07,432
Oh, it's out of order.
415
00:23:07,434 --> 00:23:08,901
Out of order?
416
00:23:08,903 --> 00:23:13,070
Yeah, something
died in there, hoo!
417
00:23:13,072 --> 00:23:15,072
If I don't find
a restroom fast,
418
00:23:15,074 --> 00:23:16,841
something's gonna die here.
419
00:23:16,843 --> 00:23:18,443
I'm sorry, it's locked.
420
00:23:18,445 --> 00:23:20,849
Oh, I'll find somewhere else.
421
00:23:32,458 --> 00:23:33,992
So, do you know
where El Dorado is?
422
00:23:33,994 --> 00:23:35,493
You bet.
423
00:23:35,495 --> 00:23:38,496
Well would you like to enlighten
me with your knowledge?
424
00:23:38,498 --> 00:23:40,264
It's about four
miles down the road,
425
00:23:40,266 --> 00:23:43,367
and you'll see a sign
post on the left.
426
00:23:43,369 --> 00:23:46,140
(TRUNK SLAMMING)
427
00:23:47,273 --> 00:23:48,473
You wouldn't
know where to find
428
00:23:48,475 --> 00:23:49,875
a good dentist
around these parts?
429
00:23:49,877 --> 00:23:51,409
I sure do, mister.
430
00:23:51,411 --> 00:23:53,412
That'd be Doc Martin.
431
00:23:53,414 --> 00:23:55,848
He's on your way out there,
432
00:23:55,850 --> 00:23:57,918
around 10 miles the
other side of town.
433
00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:01,185
He's a good sort of
bones, old Doc Martin.
434
00:24:01,187 --> 00:24:02,921
And he won't cost
you much, either.
435
00:24:02,923 --> 00:24:04,092
- (GIGGLES)
- Thanks!
436
00:24:07,026 --> 00:24:09,126
So where did you go?
437
00:24:09,128 --> 00:24:10,197
I'll tell ya later.
438
00:24:14,100 --> 00:24:16,937
(HARMONICA MUSIC)
439
00:24:19,473 --> 00:24:21,542
Are you sure this
is the way, Ollie?
440
00:24:22,943 --> 00:24:24,479
That's what it
says on the card.
441
00:24:27,147 --> 00:24:28,416
Oh, my tooth.
442
00:24:34,455 --> 00:24:35,956
I think we found it.
443
00:24:49,302 --> 00:24:51,536
Hey, buddy, we're looking
for the Doc Martin.
444
00:24:51,538 --> 00:24:56,077
Does he live around here?
445
00:25:01,314 --> 00:25:02,282
Who wants him?
446
00:25:04,385 --> 00:25:06,521
My brother needs a
dentist, that's all.
447
00:25:08,955 --> 00:25:10,655
I like you boys,
you pay in cash.
448
00:25:10,657 --> 00:25:13,492
That's a real good way
to start a relationship.
449
00:25:13,494 --> 00:25:18,129
- Will it hurt?
- Ooh, do you want it to?
450
00:25:18,131 --> 00:25:18,966
No!
451
00:25:20,100 --> 00:25:22,567
- Well, you're the customer.
- Ollie!
452
00:25:22,569 --> 00:25:24,202
Nothing to worry
about, my little friend.
453
00:25:24,204 --> 00:25:25,937
I rarely miss that vein,
454
00:25:25,939 --> 00:25:28,272
and if I do, the second
one's on the house.
455
00:25:28,274 --> 00:25:29,509
That's not bad.
456
00:25:31,011 --> 00:25:35,446
(STANLEY BREATHING HEAVILY)
457
00:25:35,448 --> 00:25:37,581
Hold 'em down.
458
00:25:37,583 --> 00:25:40,487
(STANLEY WHIMPERING)
459
00:25:43,357 --> 00:25:45,057
Whoa, oh, oh, oh.
460
00:25:45,059 --> 00:25:45,926
Oh, oh, oh!
461
00:25:47,962 --> 00:25:51,430
Ooh!
462
00:25:51,432 --> 00:25:53,065
Hmmm, I got it.
463
00:25:53,067 --> 00:25:53,902
Oh, oh.
464
00:25:57,571 --> 00:25:59,040
Yeah.
465
00:26:01,207 --> 00:26:03,607
Now get down to
the real business.
466
00:26:03,609 --> 00:26:05,245
This is the part I like.
467
00:26:06,647 --> 00:26:09,181
Kind of like digging for gold.
468
00:26:09,183 --> 00:26:11,015
Hell, you never know
what you're gonna find.
469
00:26:11,017 --> 00:26:13,652
(OLIVER LAUGHING)
470
00:26:13,654 --> 00:26:15,520
I think you'd better
wait in the other room.
471
00:26:15,522 --> 00:26:16,655
That's good.
472
00:26:16,657 --> 00:26:19,023
I get real jumpy around
drills, you know?
473
00:26:19,025 --> 00:26:20,128
Yeah, most people do.
474
00:26:27,033 --> 00:26:28,599
Lots of frillies,
but no money.
475
00:26:28,601 --> 00:26:30,003
Shit, shit, shit!
476
00:26:31,437 --> 00:26:33,704
(PHONE RINGING)
477
00:26:33,706 --> 00:26:35,240
Bobby phone?
478
00:26:35,242 --> 00:26:36,077
Bobby phone?
479
00:26:41,014 --> 00:26:41,648
What?
480
00:26:42,582 --> 00:26:43,647
Jessica, you bitch.
481
00:26:43,649 --> 00:26:45,584
Are you there?
482
00:26:45,586 --> 00:26:47,551
You can't do this to me.
483
00:26:47,553 --> 00:26:49,023
It's my fucking money.
484
00:26:50,123 --> 00:26:51,725
You know who you're
fucking with!
485
00:26:53,127 --> 00:26:55,159
Wrong number, tough guy.
486
00:26:55,161 --> 00:26:57,664
(TOMMY GIGGLES)
487
00:26:59,366 --> 00:27:01,602
(ROCK MUSIC)
488
00:27:18,385 --> 00:27:21,723
(GRUNTING AND GIGGLING)
489
00:27:31,365 --> 00:27:34,301
(LESLIE SCREAMING)
490
00:27:35,569 --> 00:27:37,569
Don't worry little lady.
491
00:27:37,571 --> 00:27:39,741
I haven't forgot about you.
492
00:27:45,378 --> 00:27:46,214
Oh!
493
00:27:48,115 --> 00:27:49,447
Let me see your breasts!
494
00:27:49,449 --> 00:27:52,119
(LESLIE CRYING)
495
00:27:56,657 --> 00:28:00,261
I love to feel the smooth
texture of your skin.
496
00:28:02,161 --> 00:28:04,495
I like to stroke the smooth skin
497
00:28:04,497 --> 00:28:05,732
and firm breasts.
498
00:28:15,609 --> 00:28:16,707
No!
499
00:28:16,709 --> 00:28:19,646
(TOMMY LAUGHING)
500
00:28:24,751 --> 00:28:26,651
You smell real good.
501
00:28:26,653 --> 00:28:28,356
You smell like
dead fish up there.
502
00:28:30,189 --> 00:28:31,490
Were you playing
with your boyfriend
503
00:28:31,492 --> 00:28:33,795
before I found you on the layby?
504
00:28:38,398 --> 00:28:40,635
You won't be performing
at our festival.
505
00:28:41,834 --> 00:28:43,702
You'll be the main course.
506
00:28:43,704 --> 00:28:46,640
(TOMMY LAUGHING)
507
00:28:51,244 --> 00:28:53,244
Don't cry, little girl.
508
00:28:53,246 --> 00:28:54,678
Don't cry.
509
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:58,151
Daddy will only kill
you if you tell a lie.
510
00:28:59,753 --> 00:29:02,790
Let me smell those water
spots between your thighs.
511
00:29:04,457 --> 00:29:07,661
Let me wipe away those tears
from your eyes before you die.
512
00:29:12,832 --> 00:29:14,368
I loved poetry at school.
513
00:29:16,270 --> 00:29:17,105
Can't you tell?
514
00:29:17,905 --> 00:29:21,676
(TOMMY LAUGHING MANICALLY)
515
00:29:25,745 --> 00:29:26,944
No!
516
00:29:26,946 --> 00:29:29,850
(TOMMY WHIMPERING)
517
00:29:36,389 --> 00:29:37,291
Jessica?
518
00:29:38,457 --> 00:29:39,292
Jessica?
519
00:29:40,927 --> 00:29:41,760
You bitch!
520
00:29:41,762 --> 00:29:43,395
You'll pay for that.
521
00:29:43,397 --> 00:29:45,463
(TOMMY COUGHING)
522
00:29:45,465 --> 00:29:47,568
- You'll pay for that.
- No!
523
00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:57,211
(SAW ENGINE RUMBLING)
524
00:30:02,782 --> 00:30:05,619
(ALL SCREAMING)
525
00:30:09,889 --> 00:30:12,627
(TOMMY LAUGHING)
526
00:30:21,234 --> 00:30:21,869
Jess?
527
00:30:25,606 --> 00:30:26,440
Jess?
528
00:30:27,340 --> 00:30:28,208
Jess!
529
00:30:29,342 --> 00:30:30,210
Jessica!
530
00:30:33,946 --> 00:30:35,248
Jessica!
531
00:30:38,985 --> 00:30:41,789
(TOMMY PANTING)
532
00:30:43,724 --> 00:30:45,560
Your boyfriend tastes good!
533
00:30:47,927 --> 00:30:49,263
You want a bite?
534
00:30:50,763 --> 00:30:52,931
Ted, it's Roy.
535
00:30:52,933 --> 00:30:53,768
I need your help.
536
00:30:55,369 --> 00:30:57,772
Something has happened and I
don't know who else to turn to.
537
00:30:59,539 --> 00:31:00,340
Thanks.
538
00:31:10,884 --> 00:31:12,483
(POP MUSIC)
539
00:31:12,485 --> 00:31:13,987
What is this shit?
540
00:31:15,421 --> 00:31:17,655
(COUNTRY MUSIC)
541
00:31:17,657 --> 00:31:18,825
That's better.
542
00:31:24,731 --> 00:31:25,866
Your brother'll be fine.
543
00:31:27,868 --> 00:31:29,770
So were you in
Vietnam or what?
544
00:31:30,736 --> 00:31:32,470
Oh yeah, many moons ago.
545
00:31:32,472 --> 00:31:34,306
I mean, I don't
mean to pry, you know?
546
00:31:34,308 --> 00:31:34,942
No problem.
547
00:31:35,908 --> 00:31:37,445
Oh, so is that you?
548
00:31:38,512 --> 00:31:39,511
Yeah.
549
00:31:39,513 --> 00:31:40,744
Like I said, many moons ago.
550
00:31:40,746 --> 00:31:41,879
You want a beer?
551
00:31:41,881 --> 00:31:43,315
No, thanks.
552
00:31:43,317 --> 00:31:46,984
So, yeah, it's a nice picture.
553
00:31:46,986 --> 00:31:48,555
We were like the Spartan Army.
554
00:31:51,858 --> 00:31:52,726
300 strong.
555
00:31:54,927 --> 00:31:56,464
We could take on anyone.
556
00:31:57,397 --> 00:31:59,734
(JAZZ MUSIC)
557
00:32:03,869 --> 00:32:06,404
300 when we started, anyway.
558
00:32:06,406 --> 00:32:08,839
Good men from good families,
559
00:32:08,841 --> 00:32:11,943
ready and willing to
fight for the cause,
560
00:32:11,945 --> 00:32:15,980
fight the good fight, free
the country of communism,
561
00:32:15,982 --> 00:32:18,015
get rid of the reds.
562
00:32:18,017 --> 00:32:20,484
Red, red, fire in the shed.
563
00:32:20,486 --> 00:32:22,921
I'd rather be dead than red.
564
00:32:22,923 --> 00:32:27,928
One by one we fought until
the cause no longer mattered.
565
00:32:28,928 --> 00:32:30,531
We just wanted to stay
alive, whatever it took.
566
00:32:31,398 --> 00:32:33,100
That 300 became 200,
567
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:35,069
then 100,
568
00:32:36,669 --> 00:32:40,975
then 50, 20, 10, until it
was only two of us left.
569
00:32:43,042 --> 00:32:44,742
By the end of it,
neither of us knew
570
00:32:44,744 --> 00:32:46,845
what we were fighting for.
571
00:32:46,847 --> 00:32:50,013
It wasn't country or cause.
572
00:32:50,015 --> 00:32:52,018
I'm not even sure it
was for ourselves.
573
00:32:53,453 --> 00:32:55,119
I only knew that I
had to keep going
574
00:32:55,121 --> 00:32:59,924
because one day I'd be
back to a place I loved,
575
00:32:59,926 --> 00:33:01,662
a place where my family lived,
576
00:33:02,561 --> 00:33:05,632
a place I called home.
577
00:33:07,067 --> 00:33:09,403
So you still see him or what?
578
00:33:12,738 --> 00:33:14,806
That's what they gave us.
579
00:33:14,808 --> 00:33:15,643
What?
580
00:33:20,813 --> 00:33:22,550
Nice, real nice.
581
00:33:23,550 --> 00:33:24,918
It's a pocket watch.
582
00:33:26,686 --> 00:33:28,819
That's what they gave us
for serving our country
583
00:33:28,821 --> 00:33:31,524
for six long years,
a pocket watch.
584
00:33:32,993 --> 00:33:35,796
Guess somebody thought that's
all a man's life is worth.
585
00:33:36,963 --> 00:33:40,033
I guess somebody thought that's
all be need is a timepiece
586
00:33:41,967 --> 00:33:44,871
to watch our life ebb away
with no friends by our side.
587
00:33:49,074 --> 00:33:52,543
(DOC MARTIN CHUCKLES)
588
00:33:52,545 --> 00:33:54,178
Now you boys come back
any time you want.
589
00:33:54,180 --> 00:33:55,847
Yeah, we will.
590
00:33:55,849 --> 00:33:58,586
(ENGINE REVVING)
591
00:33:59,718 --> 00:34:02,722
(SMOOTH CELLO MUSIC)
592
00:34:09,728 --> 00:34:10,728
Hiya, Moses.
593
00:34:10,730 --> 00:34:12,063
Hey.
594
00:34:12,065 --> 00:34:15,469
- You got a whiskey for me?
- Sure thing, Mr. Ted.
595
00:34:18,938 --> 00:34:20,507
Mr. Pickleford back there?
596
00:34:21,775 --> 00:34:23,210
Mr. Roy's out back, detective.
597
00:34:25,145 --> 00:34:26,744
Sure do like that shirt.
598
00:34:26,746 --> 00:34:27,581
Thank you.
599
00:34:29,081 --> 00:34:31,916
You want anything else?
600
00:34:31,918 --> 00:34:35,119
Not anything that
anyone else doesn't want.
601
00:34:35,121 --> 00:34:38,025
(MOSES CHUCKLES)
602
00:34:52,138 --> 00:34:53,637
Come in.
603
00:34:53,639 --> 00:34:55,739
Ah, Ted.
604
00:34:55,741 --> 00:34:57,741
Thank god you're here.
605
00:34:57,743 --> 00:34:58,578
Sit down.
606
00:35:00,045 --> 00:35:01,246
What's going on?
607
00:35:01,248 --> 00:35:04,616
Are you in trouble
with protection again?
608
00:35:04,618 --> 00:35:06,884
No, it's nothing like that.
609
00:35:06,886 --> 00:35:07,720
It's Jessica.
610
00:35:09,623 --> 00:35:12,223
Ah, that little bitch.
611
00:35:12,225 --> 00:35:13,690
What'd she do this time?
612
00:35:13,692 --> 00:35:16,293
Catch you fucking one
of the other girls?
613
00:35:16,295 --> 00:35:17,529
Of course not.
614
00:35:17,531 --> 00:35:19,197
Well, yes she did,
615
00:35:19,199 --> 00:35:21,068
but that's not what
I'm worried about.
616
00:35:22,636 --> 00:35:23,571
She's gone missing,
617
00:35:26,072 --> 00:35:27,208
but with my fucking money.
618
00:35:28,208 --> 00:35:30,041
You try calling her?
619
00:35:30,043 --> 00:35:32,175
Well why didn't
I think of that?
620
00:35:32,177 --> 00:35:34,177
Of course I tried calling her.
621
00:35:34,179 --> 00:35:37,849
The last time I called her,
was somebody else on the line.
622
00:35:37,851 --> 00:35:39,583
Some strange shit,
623
00:35:39,585 --> 00:35:41,018
and there was a noise.
624
00:35:41,020 --> 00:35:43,820
It was a (IMITATES BUZZING)
funny noise on the line.
625
00:35:43,822 --> 00:35:45,088
What kind of noise?
626
00:35:45,090 --> 00:35:47,592
It sounded like
a chainsaw to me,
627
00:35:47,594 --> 00:35:49,561
and there was this screaming.
628
00:35:49,563 --> 00:35:53,167
Screaming like oh my
god, I can't describe.
629
00:35:54,768 --> 00:35:58,239
Sounded to me like someone
was being hurt real bad.
630
00:35:59,940 --> 00:36:01,242
You know what I think?
631
00:36:02,641 --> 00:36:04,675
I think she's just
fucking with your head,
632
00:36:04,677 --> 00:36:07,110
like she's been doing
for a really long time.
633
00:36:07,112 --> 00:36:09,646
I don't understand why you
don't just kill the bitch
634
00:36:09,648 --> 00:36:11,217
and be rid of her
once and for all.
635
00:36:15,822 --> 00:36:20,224
Yeah, well, I guess you
like to fuck dancers.
636
00:36:20,226 --> 00:36:21,195
Who wouldn't?
637
00:36:22,596 --> 00:36:24,264
The thing is, you
can't marry 'em.
638
00:36:25,264 --> 00:36:26,898
You can fuck 'em all day,
639
00:36:26,900 --> 00:36:28,903
but don't put 'em
in your kitchen.
640
00:36:30,235 --> 00:36:33,070
Well thank you for
the information, Ted.
641
00:36:33,072 --> 00:36:34,271
TED: You're welcome.
642
00:36:34,273 --> 00:36:36,340
But that's not why I
asked you to come here.
643
00:36:36,342 --> 00:36:38,076
You see Jessica came back early
644
00:36:38,078 --> 00:36:40,744
from a shopping trip in Reno,
645
00:36:40,746 --> 00:36:43,715
and she found me with
one of the new dancers,
646
00:36:43,717 --> 00:36:45,215
a stupid bitch called Sally.
647
00:36:45,217 --> 00:36:49,152
- That a new girl?
- Yeah, now you wait a minute.
648
00:36:49,154 --> 00:36:51,255
(TED LAUGHING)
649
00:36:51,257 --> 00:36:53,123
I'm just saying,
I heard a new name
650
00:36:53,125 --> 00:36:55,927
and you know, makes me crazy.
651
00:36:55,929 --> 00:36:57,231
Is that her right there?
652
00:36:59,132 --> 00:37:02,333
You can have Sally as a gift.
653
00:37:02,335 --> 00:37:06,139
I want the bitch
back and my money.
654
00:37:07,139 --> 00:37:08,141
You can fuck her, too,
655
00:37:09,308 --> 00:37:11,210
and I'll hold her down
for you if you like.
656
00:37:13,813 --> 00:37:18,819
Three is a crowd, but I
thank you for the invite.
657
00:37:21,888 --> 00:37:23,223
Now what else can I do for ya?
658
00:37:24,757 --> 00:37:26,690
I want you to put
a trace on my call.
659
00:37:26,692 --> 00:37:28,358
When you get the
address, you tell me.
660
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:29,228
I'll do the rest.
661
00:37:36,136 --> 00:37:37,137
All right.
662
00:37:38,737 --> 00:37:40,204
Consider it done.
663
00:37:40,206 --> 00:37:42,139
(CLICKS TONGUE)
664
00:37:42,141 --> 00:37:45,076
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
665
00:37:45,078 --> 00:37:48,081
(CRICKETS CHIRPING)
666
00:38:02,328 --> 00:38:05,866
- You got the meat, boy?
- I sure have here.
667
00:38:09,768 --> 00:38:12,136
Hey, hold it right there.
668
00:38:12,138 --> 00:38:15,172
What the hell have you
been doing to that meat?
669
00:38:15,174 --> 00:38:17,909
I just had a little
fun with it first.
670
00:38:17,911 --> 00:38:21,746
I told you, boy, don't
you play with your food!
671
00:38:21,748 --> 00:38:23,317
Now if you're gonna
fuck something,
672
00:38:24,918 --> 00:38:25,753
make sure it's still alive.
673
00:38:26,453 --> 00:38:29,288
(BOTH LAUGHING)
674
00:38:38,163 --> 00:38:40,833
(PHONE RINGING)
675
00:38:41,801 --> 00:38:44,138
What the goddamn hell is that?
676
00:38:45,404 --> 00:38:46,239
Boons.
677
00:38:48,308 --> 00:38:50,677
Jessica, is that you?
678
00:38:51,911 --> 00:38:55,145
Where the hell did
you get this thing?
679
00:38:55,147 --> 00:38:58,215
I took it from the woman
with the fancy car, Lemmas.
680
00:38:58,217 --> 00:39:00,250
What, not one of them?
681
00:39:00,252 --> 00:39:03,356
No, sir, the bitch
with the yellow Trans Am.
682
00:39:05,759 --> 00:39:07,058
Hey, Steve.
683
00:39:07,060 --> 00:39:07,895
It's me, Ted.
684
00:39:08,828 --> 00:39:10,293
You run that trace for me?
685
00:39:10,295 --> 00:39:13,029
STEVE: Yeah, the signal back
states that the coordinates
686
00:39:13,031 --> 00:39:16,800
for that transmission
is 116.7212,
687
00:39:16,802 --> 00:39:18,936
but it's a little strange, Ted.
688
00:39:18,938 --> 00:39:20,337
Why is that?
689
00:39:20,339 --> 00:39:22,405
STEVE: Well there's just
no town listed in that area.
690
00:39:22,407 --> 00:39:23,340
There's nothing.
691
00:39:23,342 --> 00:39:24,310
Like absolutely nothing at all.
692
00:39:25,444 --> 00:39:29,248
Well, Steve, I
appreciate the info,
693
00:39:30,516 --> 00:39:32,449
but you need to make sure you
keep everything to yourself.
694
00:39:32,451 --> 00:39:33,985
Do you understand?
695
00:39:33,987 --> 00:39:35,085
STEVE: Yeah, no problem man.
696
00:39:35,087 --> 00:39:36,055
I owe ya one.
697
00:39:38,324 --> 00:39:40,427
Let's just say that
you're paid in full.
698
00:39:43,830 --> 00:39:45,032
What do you intend to do?
699
00:39:47,833 --> 00:39:51,270
Well, I'm gonna kill the bitch
700
00:39:52,605 --> 00:39:54,806
and whoever else
that bastard was
701
00:39:54,808 --> 00:39:56,275
on the other end of the phone.
702
00:39:58,877 --> 00:40:01,813
Son, do you want somebody
to find out what you're doing?
703
00:40:01,815 --> 00:40:02,547
No, Sir.
704
00:40:02,549 --> 00:40:04,047
Do you want the police to come
705
00:40:04,049 --> 00:40:05,817
and take you away from here?
706
00:40:05,819 --> 00:40:06,453
No, Sir.
707
00:40:09,188 --> 00:40:12,422
Well I don't think we'll be
needing this anymore, do you?
708
00:40:12,424 --> 00:40:13,391
No, Sir.
709
00:40:13,393 --> 00:40:15,896
(BANJO MUSIC)
710
00:40:20,232 --> 00:40:24,270
Boy, I hope you've
learned a lesson today.
711
00:40:25,505 --> 00:40:28,572
Never steal anything
more than you can eat
712
00:40:28,574 --> 00:40:31,541
from those goddamn heathens!
713
00:40:31,543 --> 00:40:33,578
Because they have strange ways
714
00:40:33,580 --> 00:40:36,514
and you don't wanna catch
their strange ways, now do ya?
715
00:40:36,516 --> 00:40:38,248
No, Sir.
716
00:40:38,250 --> 00:40:39,884
They are outsiders
717
00:40:39,886 --> 00:40:41,384
and they will remain outsiders.
718
00:40:41,386 --> 00:40:43,119
Do you understand?
719
00:40:43,121 --> 00:40:43,991
Yes, Sir.
720
00:40:48,393 --> 00:40:49,626
Okay, it's all right.
721
00:40:49,628 --> 00:40:51,295
Okay.
722
00:40:51,297 --> 00:40:53,934
(BOTH LAUGHING)
723
00:41:06,112 --> 00:41:07,411
(UPBEAT MUSIC)
724
00:41:07,413 --> 00:41:09,279
The boys get in the
edge of their destination,
725
00:41:09,281 --> 00:41:12,852
not knowing what
fate awaits them.
726
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:17,190
Look, Ollie, it's El Dorado.
727
00:41:20,426 --> 00:41:23,960
(CAR ENGINE RUMBLING)
728
00:41:23,962 --> 00:41:27,900
Now this is what we call
in the industry a wild card,
729
00:41:29,368 --> 00:41:32,205
a group of characters the
audience wasn't expecting.
730
00:41:33,438 --> 00:41:36,940
Well within minutes of the
Jews Brothers entering town
731
00:41:36,942 --> 00:41:41,411
comes the sound of
Eduardo's Desert Tours,
732
00:41:41,413 --> 00:41:44,514
only this time his
coach breaks down
733
00:41:44,516 --> 00:41:49,188
with only one place to go other
than the desert, El Dorado.
734
00:41:52,491 --> 00:41:54,460
A huge mistake, Eduardo.
735
00:41:58,998 --> 00:42:00,067
Everybody off.
736
00:42:09,641 --> 00:42:11,308
What the hell is that?
737
00:42:11,310 --> 00:42:13,412
Do you think we made the
right decision coming here?
738
00:42:14,647 --> 00:42:16,549
There was no where
else to go, Stanley.
739
00:42:17,417 --> 00:42:18,518
Why are we stopping?
740
00:42:19,618 --> 00:42:21,985
The bus is broken down
741
00:42:21,987 --> 00:42:24,523
and there isn't another
stop for 300 miles.
742
00:42:26,192 --> 00:42:29,563
It's either here or the desert.
743
00:42:39,205 --> 00:42:40,040
Asshole.
744
00:42:41,574 --> 00:42:44,511
(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
745
00:42:45,578 --> 00:42:46,913
Ladies and gentlemen,
746
00:42:48,214 --> 00:42:52,152
today is the 200th anniversary
of our little town.
747
00:42:53,453 --> 00:42:57,257
So tonight we shall celebrate
at El Dorado's own music hall
748
00:42:58,123 --> 00:42:59,690
with our special guests,
749
00:42:59,692 --> 00:43:01,257
live from California,
750
00:43:01,259 --> 00:43:04,462
the Soggy Bottom Boys
and their tribute act.
751
00:43:04,464 --> 00:43:06,063
Is he talking about us?
752
00:43:06,065 --> 00:43:07,264
JJ's done it again.
753
00:43:07,266 --> 00:43:10,034
But we're the Jews Brothers.
754
00:43:10,036 --> 00:43:11,571
Not tonight, we're not.
755
00:43:12,572 --> 00:43:13,573
Hooray!
756
00:43:14,574 --> 00:43:16,706
Come one, come
all, and celebrate
757
00:43:16,708 --> 00:43:20,714
with the Soggy Bottom
Boys live at our Old Opry.
758
00:43:23,081 --> 00:43:26,217
Hiya cowboys, line up,
line up, and try you luck.
759
00:43:26,219 --> 00:43:28,052
Shoot a can if you can.
760
00:43:28,054 --> 00:43:30,353
(GIGGLES)
761
00:43:30,355 --> 00:43:33,056
Would you and your daughter
mind to have a try, Sir?
762
00:43:33,058 --> 00:43:35,761
That's my wife,
shorty, not my daughter.
763
00:43:36,828 --> 00:43:38,695
Cheeky little fucker.
764
00:43:38,697 --> 00:43:39,532
I'll show him.
765
00:43:42,067 --> 00:43:45,004
(GLASS SHATTERING)
766
00:43:49,741 --> 00:43:51,510
Well done, Daddy!
767
00:43:52,578 --> 00:43:53,580
Good shot, cowboy.
768
00:43:54,781 --> 00:43:57,016
Like I said, that's
what I call shooting.
769
00:44:00,152 --> 00:44:02,555
Been buying in El Dorado
for almost 200 years now.
770
00:44:03,723 --> 00:44:06,090
First settlers came to
this part of the desert
771
00:44:06,092 --> 00:44:09,563
to claim the gold, and
then they decided to stay.
772
00:44:10,830 --> 00:44:12,563
How can I help you, little lady?
773
00:44:12,565 --> 00:44:14,764
Is there still gold here?
774
00:44:14,766 --> 00:44:15,668
Good question.
775
00:44:17,136 --> 00:44:18,237
Some say no,
776
00:44:19,371 --> 00:44:21,137
but I believe that if
you wish hard enough
777
00:44:21,139 --> 00:44:23,340
your dreams could come
true at El Dorado.
778
00:44:23,342 --> 00:44:24,378
Fact!
779
00:44:25,578 --> 00:44:28,047
Some say El Dorado was
discovered by a pirate,
780
00:44:29,181 --> 00:44:30,648
a rogue of the sea.
781
00:44:30,650 --> 00:44:32,248
(EERIE MUSIC)
782
00:44:32,250 --> 00:44:35,085
Captain Jake was his name.
783
00:44:35,087 --> 00:44:37,188
Hard drinking,
woman loving pirate
784
00:44:37,190 --> 00:44:39,190
that only cared for the sea.
785
00:44:39,192 --> 00:44:43,427
Like all stories, things didn't
go right for Captain Jake,
786
00:44:43,429 --> 00:44:45,365
and on a night very
similar to tonight,
787
00:44:46,331 --> 00:44:47,534
his ship hit a storm.
788
00:44:49,668 --> 00:44:51,437
He fought the waves!
789
00:44:52,538 --> 00:44:54,608
As his shipped
bobbed on the sea,
790
00:44:55,607 --> 00:44:57,474
like a matchstick on (MUMBLES).
791
00:44:57,476 --> 00:44:59,712
Tell me, what
happened to this pirate?
792
00:45:01,147 --> 00:45:04,618
Well, Captain Jake fought
those waves to the bitter end.
793
00:45:05,650 --> 00:45:09,089
When out of the sea came
a monster from hell.
794
00:45:12,625 --> 00:45:14,525
The Kraken appeared.
795
00:45:14,527 --> 00:45:17,728
Some say it stood 1,000
feet, not an inch more.
796
00:45:17,730 --> 00:45:19,163
Well what did he do?
797
00:45:19,165 --> 00:45:20,396
SHERIFF: Like
any good Captain,
798
00:45:20,398 --> 00:45:22,366
Captain Jake went
down with his ship
799
00:45:22,368 --> 00:45:25,768
as the Kraken curled,
dragging it under the sea,
800
00:45:25,770 --> 00:45:29,239
along with Davy Jones' locker.
801
00:45:29,241 --> 00:45:30,674
Did he die?
802
00:45:30,676 --> 00:45:31,844
Did the Kraken kill him?
803
00:45:33,346 --> 00:45:34,945
Well we're talking
about Captain Jake, here.
804
00:45:34,947 --> 00:45:37,715
A rogue of the sea, little lady.
805
00:45:37,717 --> 00:45:40,317
As Captain Jake watches
the awful scene,
806
00:45:40,319 --> 00:45:43,353
he knows his destiny
must travel another path.
807
00:45:43,355 --> 00:45:45,458
On that path Captain
Jake traveled.
808
00:45:47,659 --> 00:45:50,730
(THUNDER CRASHING)
809
00:46:02,741 --> 00:46:05,678
(GLASS SHATTERING)
810
00:46:09,248 --> 00:46:11,717
(EERIE MUSIC)
811
00:46:13,853 --> 00:46:17,190
That's it, go west
yon man, go west.
812
00:46:18,857 --> 00:46:21,224
So what happened next?
813
00:46:21,226 --> 00:46:21,860
Arr!
814
00:46:23,529 --> 00:46:27,598
Now this part is interesting.
815
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:29,435
Captain Jake walked
for many a moon,
816
00:46:30,603 --> 00:46:31,871
many a day through
the desert sun.
817
00:46:33,471 --> 00:46:35,941
Legend states that Captain
Jake stumbled on this spot
818
00:46:37,543 --> 00:46:40,380
and as his body melted
into the desert,
819
00:46:41,547 --> 00:46:44,918
became an oasis which
later became El Dorado.
820
00:46:46,819 --> 00:46:48,755
And that, little lady,
821
00:46:50,956 --> 00:46:52,826
is the legend of El Dorado.
822
00:46:58,331 --> 00:46:59,797
This ain't no
Blues Club, Ollie.
823
00:46:59,799 --> 00:47:00,800
What are we gonna do?
824
00:47:01,967 --> 00:47:03,833
Oh, what are we gonna do, Ollie?
825
00:47:03,835 --> 00:47:05,703
We ain't no bluegrass
tribute act.
826
00:47:05,705 --> 00:47:07,770
The only song I know is the one
827
00:47:07,772 --> 00:47:10,340
that Daddy used to sing
us when we were kids!
828
00:47:10,342 --> 00:47:12,242
That's a great idea, Stanley.
829
00:47:12,244 --> 00:47:13,844
- Let's do that one.
- What?
830
00:47:13,846 --> 00:47:15,346
Now our very own El Dorado boy
831
00:47:15,348 --> 00:47:20,353
who will be doing a tune
for all you good city folk.
832
00:47:20,953 --> 00:47:23,786
Come on, Tommy, come up.
833
00:47:23,788 --> 00:47:26,192
(CROWD BOOS)
834
00:47:28,627 --> 00:47:30,930
Bit short for Elvis, ain't he?
835
00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:36,699
(TOMMY SINGING INCOHERENTLY)
836
00:47:36,701 --> 00:47:39,305
(CROWD BOOING)
837
00:47:42,340 --> 00:47:43,873
I can't hear you.
838
00:47:43,875 --> 00:47:46,944
(CROWD BOOING)
839
00:47:46,946 --> 00:47:50,616
(TOMMY SINGING GIBBERISH)
840
00:47:55,788 --> 00:47:57,020
Bring on the Soggy Bottom Boys,
841
00:47:57,022 --> 00:47:58,257
not this crap.
842
00:47:59,357 --> 00:48:00,556
(LAUGHS)
843
00:48:00,558 --> 00:48:01,625
You can do anything, Tommy.
844
00:48:01,627 --> 00:48:03,761
You can just do anything to me.
845
00:48:03,763 --> 00:48:06,433
(CROWD JEERING)
846
00:48:09,467 --> 00:48:11,804
Elvis has left the building!
847
00:48:16,475 --> 00:48:18,308
Ladies and gentlemen,
848
00:48:18,310 --> 00:48:19,946
due to popular demand,
849
00:48:21,580 --> 00:48:24,447
we're gonna cut short our
Elvis appreciation tribute
850
00:48:24,449 --> 00:48:26,949
and go straight to the
main act of the evening.
851
00:48:26,951 --> 00:48:28,587
What are you doing?
852
00:48:30,723 --> 00:48:31,791
I have an idea.
853
00:48:32,891 --> 00:48:34,391
Oh, not another one.
854
00:48:34,393 --> 00:48:37,927
All the way form
southern California,
855
00:48:37,929 --> 00:48:42,666
theirs is a tribute act
to end all tribute acts.
856
00:48:42,668 --> 00:48:44,867
They may be from Las Vegas,
857
00:48:44,869 --> 00:48:48,605
but their hearts are
in the deep south.
858
00:48:48,607 --> 00:48:52,679
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Soggy Bottom Boys.
859
00:48:53,712 --> 00:48:55,545
CROWD: Soggy Bottom Boys!
860
00:48:55,547 --> 00:48:57,348
Soggy Bottom Boys!
861
00:48:57,350 --> 00:48:59,016
Soggy Bottom Boys!
862
00:48:59,018 --> 00:49:00,884
Soggy Bottom Boys!
863
00:49:00,886 --> 00:49:02,820
Soggy Bottom Boys!
864
00:49:02,822 --> 00:49:04,755
Soggy Bottom Boys!
865
00:49:04,757 --> 00:49:06,155
Soggy Bottom Boys!
866
00:49:06,157 --> 00:49:08,862
(CROWD CHEERS)
867
00:49:09,828 --> 00:49:12,398
(TWANGY MUSIC)
868
00:49:13,866 --> 00:49:17,701
♪ On the mountain in Virginia ♪
869
00:49:17,703 --> 00:49:21,838
♪ Stands a lonesome pine ♪
870
00:49:21,840 --> 00:49:25,842
♪ Just below is the cabin home ♪
871
00:49:25,844 --> 00:49:29,913
♪ Of a little friend of mine ♪
872
00:49:29,915 --> 00:49:31,882
♪ Her name is June ♪
873
00:49:31,884 --> 00:49:33,983
♪ And very, very soon ♪
874
00:49:33,985 --> 00:49:37,357
♪ She'll belong to me ♪
875
00:49:45,096 --> 00:49:47,366
What's up with the
phones in this place?
876
00:49:48,067 --> 00:49:49,465
None of them work.
877
00:49:49,467 --> 00:49:50,936
That's El Dorado
for you, buddy.
878
00:49:52,138 --> 00:49:53,837
What can I do for ya, stranger?
879
00:49:53,839 --> 00:49:55,938
I need to get my bus fixed.
880
00:49:55,940 --> 00:49:57,741
You need to see Lemmas.
881
00:49:57,743 --> 00:49:59,675
Who is Lemmas?
882
00:49:59,677 --> 00:50:01,811
He's the butcher
here in these parts.
883
00:50:01,813 --> 00:50:04,181
I need a mechanic,
not a butcher.
884
00:50:04,183 --> 00:50:06,516
It's Lemmas' Chop Shop.
885
00:50:06,518 --> 00:50:08,918
Need anything mechanical
done, that's your man.
886
00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:11,690
You need a lean,
clean, thick steak,
887
00:50:12,525 --> 00:50:13,956
that's your man also.
888
00:50:13,958 --> 00:50:16,029
The man, right.
889
00:50:23,868 --> 00:50:27,871
♪ In the Blue Ridge
Mountains of Virginia ♪
890
00:50:27,873 --> 00:50:29,773
♪ Mountains of Virginia ♪
891
00:50:29,775 --> 00:50:33,976
♪ On the trail of
the lonesome pine ♪
892
00:50:33,978 --> 00:50:36,915
(CROWD CHEERING)
893
00:50:39,485 --> 00:50:43,056
("MAN OF CONSTANT SORROW")
894
00:50:52,964 --> 00:50:57,936
♪ I am a man of
constant sorrow ♪
895
00:51:00,538 --> 00:51:05,444
♪ I've seen trouble
all my days ♪
896
00:51:06,978 --> 00:51:11,984
♪ I bid farewell
to old Kentucky ♪
897
00:51:13,953 --> 00:51:18,958
♪ The place where I
was born and raised ♪
898
00:51:19,991 --> 00:51:24,630
♪ The place where he
was born and raised ♪
899
00:51:26,098 --> 00:51:31,103
♪ For six long years
I've been in trouble ♪
900
00:51:33,538 --> 00:51:38,511
♪ No pleasure here
on earth I've found ♪
901
00:51:39,944 --> 00:51:44,950
♪ For in this world
I'm bound to ramble ♪
902
00:51:47,552 --> 00:51:52,525
♪ I have no friends
to help me now ♪
903
00:51:53,726 --> 00:51:57,197
♪ He has no friends
to help him now ♪
904
00:52:00,766 --> 00:52:03,269
(CROWD CHEERING)
905
00:52:13,578 --> 00:52:18,551
♪ It's fare thee well
my own true lover ♪
906
00:52:20,985 --> 00:52:25,991
♪ I never expect
to see you again ♪
907
00:52:27,592 --> 00:52:32,565
♪ For I'm bound to ride
that northern railroad ♪
908
00:52:34,933 --> 00:52:39,938
♪ Perhaps I'll die
upon that train ♪
909
00:52:41,105 --> 00:52:44,743
♪ Perhaps he'll die
upon that train ♪
910
00:53:01,125 --> 00:53:06,031
♪ Maybe your friends think
I'm just a stranger ♪
911
00:53:08,199 --> 00:53:13,205
♪ My face you never
will see no more ♪
912
00:53:15,107 --> 00:53:20,112
♪ But there is one
promise that is given ♪
913
00:53:22,181 --> 00:53:27,186
♪ I'll meet you on
god's golden shore ♪
914
00:53:28,654 --> 00:53:32,257
♪ He'll meet you on
god's golden shore ♪
915
00:53:35,728 --> 00:53:37,996
Oh good, it's about time.
916
00:53:38,964 --> 00:53:41,697
(CROWD CHEERING)
917
00:53:41,699 --> 00:53:43,602
I need to hit the head.
918
00:53:47,239 --> 00:53:50,009
That was the
Soggy Bottom Boys,
919
00:53:51,243 --> 00:53:55,148
all the way from Las Vegas,
just for you good folk.
920
00:54:01,386 --> 00:54:02,154
Dick?
921
00:54:03,087 --> 00:54:04,855
Dick?
922
00:54:04,857 --> 00:54:05,692
Dick?
923
00:54:09,795 --> 00:54:14,801
Dick!
924
00:54:16,701 --> 00:54:19,469
Do you think I could
help her find her dick?
925
00:54:19,471 --> 00:54:21,103
We haven't got time, Stanley.
926
00:54:21,105 --> 00:54:23,040
Aw, but Ollie.
927
00:54:23,042 --> 00:54:27,143
You can't leave a young lady
wanting a dick, can you?
928
00:54:27,145 --> 00:54:28,210
Dick?
929
00:54:28,212 --> 00:54:29,081
Dick!
930
00:54:30,214 --> 00:54:31,715
What's the point
of having a Dick
931
00:54:31,717 --> 00:54:33,784
when you can't find him?
932
00:54:33,786 --> 00:54:35,421
He's never around
when you need him.
933
00:54:42,460 --> 00:54:43,328
11:58.
934
00:54:45,163 --> 00:54:46,165
She's gonna die.
935
00:54:47,232 --> 00:54:48,301
She's gonna die, Ted.
936
00:54:49,802 --> 00:54:52,405
Fast and hard, like
sperm hitting the condom.
937
00:54:53,806 --> 00:54:57,273
Well then, I'm
gonna go with you.
938
00:54:57,275 --> 00:54:58,875
There's no need.
939
00:54:58,877 --> 00:55:01,244
Two guns are better than one.
940
00:55:01,246 --> 00:55:02,978
You just wanna fuck my wife.
941
00:55:02,980 --> 00:55:04,213
Yes, I do.
942
00:55:04,215 --> 00:55:06,386
(MEN LAUGH)
943
00:55:09,788 --> 00:55:13,292
(TOMMY LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
944
00:55:19,931 --> 00:55:22,364
So Ollie, where
do we go from here?
945
00:55:22,366 --> 00:55:24,166
Yo Stanley, if
JJ's got anything
946
00:55:24,168 --> 00:55:25,737
to do with it, who knows?
947
00:55:30,942 --> 00:55:32,011
Ahh, Ollie!
948
00:55:33,011 --> 00:55:33,980
It's an ear!
949
00:55:39,217 --> 00:55:42,351
(WATER RUNNING)
950
00:55:42,353 --> 00:55:43,786
Back in El Dorado,
951
00:55:43,788 --> 00:55:47,456
Chef Mario gets ready
for the celebration.
952
00:55:47,458 --> 00:55:50,062
Bon appetite, city slickers.
953
00:55:51,295 --> 00:55:52,429
Trying to make a 40
954
00:55:52,431 --> 00:55:54,797
going for a four.
955
00:55:54,799 --> 00:55:56,233
(LAUGHING)
956
00:55:56,235 --> 00:55:57,236
So?
957
00:55:58,302 --> 00:56:00,070
What's cooking, Mario?
958
00:56:00,072 --> 00:56:03,440
My cuisine will be
fit for a king, Mayor.
959
00:56:03,442 --> 00:56:07,811
The meat will just
fall from the bone.
960
00:56:07,813 --> 00:56:09,945
That sounds good, Mario.
961
00:56:09,947 --> 00:56:12,282
We don't want them city
slickers finding out
962
00:56:12,284 --> 00:56:15,152
our little secret
before they need to.
963
00:56:15,154 --> 00:56:18,121
City gourmet.
964
00:56:18,123 --> 00:56:19,225
City gourmet.
965
00:56:21,592 --> 00:56:23,826
(MUMBLES)
966
00:56:23,828 --> 00:56:25,997
(HUMMING)
967
00:56:28,299 --> 00:56:29,900
(LAUGHING)
968
00:56:29,902 --> 00:56:32,302
Ladies and gentlemen,
969
00:56:32,304 --> 00:56:36,873
Chef Mario brings to you
the bistro resistance
970
00:56:36,875 --> 00:56:39,308
in El Dorado cooking!
971
00:56:39,310 --> 00:56:41,980
(CROWD OOING)
972
00:56:47,485 --> 00:56:48,518
Voila!
973
00:56:48,520 --> 00:56:51,357
(CROWD SCREAMING)
974
00:56:52,223 --> 00:56:55,327
(FOREBODING MUSIC)
975
00:57:08,306 --> 00:57:11,042
(BELL RINGING)
976
00:57:15,246 --> 00:57:17,380
Welcome to Boon's, city folk,
977
00:57:17,382 --> 00:57:19,049
home of the combo.
978
00:57:19,051 --> 00:57:21,985
You gentlemen want anything?
979
00:57:21,987 --> 00:57:24,920
Yeah, give me some black
coffee and cigarettes.
980
00:57:24,922 --> 00:57:27,991
- And some information.
- Information?
981
00:57:27,993 --> 00:57:30,893
Information can cost
you, city slickers.
982
00:57:30,895 --> 00:57:32,497
Tough guys from the big city.
983
00:57:34,433 --> 00:57:37,500
Has a woman in a yellow
Trans Am been through here?
984
00:57:37,502 --> 00:57:39,902
- Nope.
- You sure?
985
00:57:39,904 --> 00:57:44,340
Like I say, boss, no pussy
wagon has come this way.
986
00:57:44,342 --> 00:57:45,442
Pussy wagon?
987
00:57:45,444 --> 00:57:47,309
Now that's a strange
expression to use.
988
00:57:47,311 --> 00:57:49,012
Why did you say pussy wagon?
989
00:57:49,014 --> 00:57:50,246
TOMMY: What?
990
00:57:50,248 --> 00:57:51,915
Pussy wagon, why'd you say it?
991
00:57:51,917 --> 00:57:53,351
Yo, boss, I don't understand.
992
00:57:56,388 --> 00:57:59,021
Now say something
funny, laughing boy.
993
00:57:59,023 --> 00:58:01,925
Yo I don't understand, boss.
994
00:58:01,927 --> 00:58:03,525
Oh, you will.
995
00:58:03,527 --> 00:58:06,096
Like I say, no
one's come this way.
996
00:58:06,098 --> 00:58:07,529
Shut up and stop lying!
997
00:58:07,531 --> 00:58:08,465
Roy!
998
00:58:08,467 --> 00:58:10,400
What's going on?
999
00:58:10,402 --> 00:58:13,402
Now say, wrong
number tough guy.
1000
00:58:13,404 --> 00:58:15,307
- What?
- Say it!
1001
00:58:16,507 --> 00:58:18,108
Wrong number, tough guy.
1002
00:58:18,110 --> 00:58:19,175
Roy, talk to me.
1003
00:58:19,177 --> 00:58:22,177
Now say it and then laugh.
1004
00:58:22,179 --> 00:58:23,313
Roy, talk to me!
1005
00:58:23,315 --> 00:58:24,547
I'm not going crazy.
1006
00:58:24,549 --> 00:58:26,650
Say it or I'll blow
your fucking brains out
1007
00:58:26,652 --> 00:58:27,717
right here, right now.
1008
00:58:27,719 --> 00:58:30,420
Wrong number tough guy!
1009
00:58:30,422 --> 00:58:34,991
Now say it and mean
it without the stammer.
1010
00:58:34,993 --> 00:58:37,460
Wrong number, tough guy.
1011
00:58:37,462 --> 00:58:38,460
(ROY CHUCKLES)
1012
00:58:38,462 --> 00:58:40,496
You bastard, I
knew it was you.
1013
00:58:40,498 --> 00:58:41,730
What have you done
with my money?
1014
00:58:41,732 --> 00:58:43,400
Roy, tell me the story!
1015
00:58:43,402 --> 00:58:44,967
This is the little fucker
1016
00:58:44,969 --> 00:58:47,203
who was on the other
end of the line.
1017
00:58:47,205 --> 00:58:48,404
How else would he have known
1018
00:58:48,406 --> 00:58:51,407
that she called her
Trans Am a pussy wagon?
1019
00:58:51,409 --> 00:58:52,474
Yo money, boss?
1020
00:58:52,476 --> 00:58:54,643
Yeah, you're listening now.
1021
00:58:54,645 --> 00:58:58,213
Yeah, say you haven't seen
the silver case with my money
1022
00:58:58,215 --> 00:59:00,349
before I shoot you
between the eyes.
1023
00:59:00,351 --> 00:59:01,684
Money?
1024
00:59:01,686 --> 00:59:03,453
Yeah, yeah, money.
1025
00:59:03,455 --> 00:59:05,558
A million dollars
of my money, ah!
1026
00:59:08,393 --> 00:59:09,228
Uh.
1027
00:59:10,362 --> 00:59:12,061
So I'm the little
fucker am I, big boy?
1028
00:59:12,063 --> 00:59:14,634
(TOMMY LAUGHING)
1029
00:59:15,600 --> 00:59:18,000
Both of you, raise your hands.
1030
00:59:18,002 --> 00:59:21,273
I'm gonna take you out back
and show you my workshop.
1031
00:59:24,509 --> 00:59:25,474
Where is she?
1032
00:59:25,476 --> 00:59:27,110
Where is who, numb nuts?
1033
00:59:27,112 --> 00:59:30,447
You answered the phone,
bitch in the Trans Am.
1034
00:59:30,449 --> 00:59:32,148
Pussy wagon lady,
1035
00:59:32,150 --> 00:59:34,351
she's gonna be taken care of
1036
00:59:34,353 --> 00:59:37,520
just like you and your money.
1037
00:59:37,522 --> 00:59:39,521
Your time's coming, freak.
1038
00:59:39,523 --> 00:59:41,991
This could be the end of us.
1039
00:59:41,993 --> 00:59:43,128
Not again.
1040
00:59:47,565 --> 00:59:50,233
(GUNSHOTS RESOUNDING)
1041
00:59:50,235 --> 00:59:51,237
Hello, Mayor?
1042
00:59:52,503 --> 00:59:54,206
Yeah, it's all sorted.
1043
00:59:56,308 --> 00:59:57,540
Okay, Tommy.
1044
00:59:57,542 --> 00:59:58,574
That's good, lad.
1045
00:59:58,576 --> 01:00:00,312
That's real good.
1046
01:00:01,513 --> 01:00:04,549
Just come back when
you clear out there.
1047
01:00:05,650 --> 01:00:06,648
Yeah, okay.
1048
01:00:06,650 --> 01:00:08,219
I'll come right over.
1049
01:00:10,654 --> 01:00:12,322
Are the men ready, Lemmas?
1050
01:00:12,324 --> 01:00:13,456
Oh yeah.
1051
01:00:13,458 --> 01:00:14,556
Yep, they've already
started rounding up
1052
01:00:14,558 --> 01:00:15,759
the coach passengers, Mayor.
1053
01:00:15,761 --> 01:00:16,594
Good.
1054
01:00:17,728 --> 01:00:18,561
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
1055
01:00:18,563 --> 01:00:19,496
(GUNSHOT RESOUNDS)
1056
01:00:19,498 --> 01:00:21,130
For tonight the clown will rise
1057
01:00:21,132 --> 01:00:23,435
and blood will flow in
the streets of El Dorado.
1058
01:00:24,569 --> 01:00:27,770
(GUNS SHOOTING)
1059
01:00:27,772 --> 01:00:30,407
It seems like someone's
been asking some questions
1060
01:00:30,409 --> 01:00:32,175
about the little?
(GUNSHOT)
1061
01:00:32,177 --> 01:00:33,012
Who?
1062
01:00:35,614 --> 01:00:38,184
(GUN SHOOTING)
1063
01:00:41,619 --> 01:00:42,619
I know him.
1064
01:00:42,621 --> 01:00:44,056
Friend or foe?
1065
01:00:45,190 --> 01:00:47,357
Now it was a long time ago.
1066
01:00:47,359 --> 01:00:48,757
He might have forgotten
about me by now.
1067
01:00:48,759 --> 01:00:50,393
Kill him anyway.
1068
01:00:50,395 --> 01:00:52,462
Bring back the money
if you can find it.
1069
01:00:52,464 --> 01:00:54,400
Meanwhile, we'll
carry on looking here.
1070
01:00:55,567 --> 01:00:56,369
Okay.
1071
01:00:57,469 --> 01:01:02,441
♪ Hey hey ♪
1072
01:01:05,476 --> 01:01:10,482
♪ Hey hey ♪
1073
01:01:13,451 --> 01:01:18,456
♪ Hey hey yeah ♪
1074
01:01:19,657 --> 01:01:24,663
♪ Hey hey hey hey ♪
1075
01:01:28,165 --> 01:01:33,138
♪ Oh ♪
1076
01:01:36,475 --> 01:01:38,308
♪ Hey ♪
1077
01:01:38,310 --> 01:01:40,145
♪ Hey ♪
1078
01:01:45,917 --> 01:01:48,617
(MUSIC BLARING ON TV)
1079
01:01:48,619 --> 01:01:50,355
Been a long time, Lemmas.
1080
01:01:51,857 --> 01:01:52,824
LEMMAS: Too long.
1081
01:01:56,127 --> 01:01:58,263
Too many questions,
not enough answers.
1082
01:01:59,397 --> 01:02:00,299
There never were.
1083
01:02:04,201 --> 01:02:05,136
'Nam was like that.
1084
01:02:09,741 --> 01:02:10,676
You want a drink?
1085
01:02:16,614 --> 01:02:18,216
I've come here to kill you.
1086
01:02:22,654 --> 01:02:24,322
Hell, I know that.
1087
01:02:27,424 --> 01:02:28,526
You wanna get ready?
1088
01:02:32,531 --> 01:02:33,364
Yep.
1089
01:02:37,735 --> 01:02:39,237
LEMMAS: You got
your timepiece?
1090
01:02:41,839 --> 01:02:43,639
Ah, you wanna time this?
1091
01:02:43,641 --> 01:02:46,846
- Why not?
- Yeah.
1092
01:02:48,679 --> 01:02:51,583
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
1093
01:02:55,819 --> 01:02:58,387
It wasn't supposed
to be like this.
1094
01:02:58,389 --> 01:02:59,257
Oh, yes it was.
1095
01:03:02,194 --> 01:03:03,395
Yeah, maybe you're right.
1096
01:03:04,563 --> 01:03:05,862
300 men go into battle,
1097
01:03:05,864 --> 01:03:08,300
- only two came out alive.
- I remember.
1098
01:03:09,266 --> 01:03:11,400
Death stamped our passport,
1099
01:03:11,402 --> 01:03:13,335
body bags were ordered.
1100
01:03:13,337 --> 01:03:14,606
We weren't meant to live.
1101
01:03:16,373 --> 01:03:18,308
Only God makes those choices.
1102
01:03:18,310 --> 01:03:20,009
Religion is for
the weak minded,
1103
01:03:20,011 --> 01:03:21,844
men who have nothing
else to live for.
1104
01:03:21,846 --> 01:03:22,947
Then what do we got?
1105
01:03:26,951 --> 01:03:27,785
Death.
1106
01:03:33,391 --> 01:03:34,293
Time check.
1107
01:03:36,694 --> 01:03:39,430
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
1108
01:03:45,636 --> 01:03:50,208
11:58 and 20 seconds.
1109
01:03:53,712 --> 01:03:56,549
(CLOCK TICKING)
1110
01:03:57,681 --> 01:04:00,685
(BLUEGRASS MUSIC)
1111
01:04:06,991 --> 01:04:09,761
(MEN SHOUTING)
1112
01:04:13,331 --> 01:04:14,963
MAYOR: You found anything?
1113
01:04:14,965 --> 01:04:16,699
TOMMY: I've
ripped the car apart,
1114
01:04:16,701 --> 01:04:18,737
but I can't find
anything, Mayor.
1115
01:04:20,071 --> 01:04:22,808
(MEN SHOUTING)
1116
01:04:30,614 --> 01:04:32,614
The bitch hid the
money somewhere.
1117
01:04:32,616 --> 01:04:35,317
Maybe she hid it
in the desert, Mayor?
1118
01:04:35,319 --> 01:04:36,953
Maybe, or maybe
she did give it
1119
01:04:36,955 --> 01:04:39,725
to the dentist for safekeeping?
1120
01:04:51,402 --> 01:04:54,939
Citizens of El Dorado,
it's time to dance.
1121
01:04:56,540 --> 01:04:59,043
(CLOCK TICKING)
1122
01:04:59,877 --> 01:05:02,046
(BOOMING)
1123
01:05:08,786 --> 01:05:11,788
Back at Lemmas'
slaughter house,
1124
01:05:11,790 --> 01:05:15,326
Tommy cleans up what
is left of Jessica
1125
01:05:16,460 --> 01:05:19,031
before he takes
care of our heroes.
1126
01:05:20,565 --> 01:05:25,070
Oh dear, Jessica has got
herself into a frightful mess.
1127
01:05:28,873 --> 01:05:29,806
Am I dreaming?
1128
01:05:29,808 --> 01:05:31,541
(TOMMY GIGGLES)
1129
01:05:31,543 --> 01:05:32,942
Depends.
1130
01:05:32,944 --> 01:05:34,844
On what, fat boy?
1131
01:05:34,846 --> 01:05:36,878
If you're having
my type of dreams.
1132
01:05:36,880 --> 01:05:38,748
(TOMMY LAUGHS)
1133
01:05:38,750 --> 01:05:42,888
You know my daddy always wanted
me to go to cookery school?
1134
01:05:44,054 --> 01:05:45,788
But what do I want
with gourmet cooking
1135
01:05:45,790 --> 01:05:48,527
when I could have
food like this?
1136
01:05:50,362 --> 01:05:53,061
Do you know where
this came from?
1137
01:05:53,063 --> 01:05:55,797
Some rich bitch
with a smooth pussy
1138
01:05:55,799 --> 01:05:59,037
that used to sit her ass
on a yellow Trans Am.
1139
01:06:01,406 --> 01:06:03,373
She's a Barbie doll!
1140
01:06:03,375 --> 01:06:05,511
I know 'cause I found her.
1141
01:06:09,813 --> 01:06:11,780
Well, Soggy Bottom Boys,
1142
01:06:11,782 --> 01:06:13,516
it looks like it's your time
1143
01:06:13,518 --> 01:06:15,851
'cause the whole town
needs sandwiches.
1144
01:06:15,853 --> 01:06:18,054
(TOMMY CACKLING)
1145
01:06:18,056 --> 01:06:20,790
(TOMMY GROANING)
1146
01:06:20,792 --> 01:06:23,362
(SMOOTH MUSIC)
1147
01:06:33,804 --> 01:06:35,904
Now ain't that a bit of luck?
1148
01:06:35,906 --> 01:06:37,909
Not a gunslinger in sight.
1149
01:06:39,476 --> 01:06:43,549
Maybe Oliver and Stanley will
finally escape El Dorado.
1150
01:06:44,949 --> 01:06:47,953
Whoop, on the other hand.
1151
01:06:58,096 --> 01:07:00,862
Mayor, the Soggy
Bottom Boys are escaping!
1152
01:07:00,864 --> 01:07:01,998
Escaping?
1153
01:07:02,000 --> 01:07:04,166
Goddammit, I want them dead.
1154
01:07:04,168 --> 01:07:06,501
Real dead.
1155
01:07:06,503 --> 01:07:11,509
We gotta go kill these
sons of bitches, now.
1156
01:07:12,076 --> 01:07:14,713
(BLUES ROCK MUSIC)
1157
01:07:17,614 --> 01:07:19,784
(GUNFIRE)
1158
01:07:27,859 --> 01:07:31,494
Now this is what
we call a finale.
1159
01:07:31,496 --> 01:07:33,795
Riveting, isn't it?
1160
01:07:33,797 --> 01:07:35,967
(GUNFIRE)
1161
01:08:00,023 --> 01:08:02,161
(SCREAMING)
1162
01:08:08,967 --> 01:08:11,032
Don't even think
about it, Stanley.
1163
01:08:11,034 --> 01:08:12,804
Well, it's another fine mess.
1164
01:08:15,572 --> 01:08:16,872
- Break!
- What?
1165
01:08:16,874 --> 01:08:18,741
I said break!
1166
01:08:18,743 --> 01:08:20,611
Ollie look, it's the Mayor.
1167
01:08:25,249 --> 01:08:26,649
(CRASHING)
1168
01:08:26,651 --> 01:08:29,154
(MEN SCREAMING)
1169
01:08:31,021 --> 01:08:32,087
(FIRE CRACKLING)
1170
01:08:32,089 --> 01:08:34,826
(MEN GROANING)
1171
01:08:37,829 --> 01:08:40,232
OLIVER: Look,
Stanley, it's the car.
1172
01:08:45,069 --> 01:08:48,970
So Ollie, where's
the next gig?
1173
01:08:48,972 --> 01:08:52,043
- I better phone JJ.
- Ah, yeah.
1174
01:09:04,355 --> 01:09:07,159
(TIRES SQUEALING)
1175
01:09:11,728 --> 01:09:13,362
So what the hell you
got there, Stanley?
1176
01:09:13,364 --> 01:09:15,765
Well you know that Trans Am
1177
01:09:15,767 --> 01:09:18,768
at the back of the
diner near the washroom?
1178
01:09:18,770 --> 01:09:20,038
- Yeah?
- Well in there,
1179
01:09:20,972 --> 01:09:22,708
do you want me to take it back?
1180
01:09:24,575 --> 01:09:29,046
("HIGHWAY TO HELL" BY AC/DC)
1181
01:12:32,929 --> 01:12:35,333
What's so wrong with my food?
1182
01:12:36,299 --> 01:12:38,003
What's wrong with my food?
1183
01:12:39,169 --> 01:12:40,304
Did I add too many spices?
1184
01:12:42,572 --> 01:12:44,405
I don't know.
1185
01:12:44,407 --> 01:12:46,111
I want to be a chef.
1186
01:12:49,179 --> 01:12:50,182
Aye!
1187
01:12:51,481 --> 01:12:53,819
(SOBBING)
1188
01:12:55,152 --> 01:12:57,418
What's wrong with my cooking?
1189
01:12:57,420 --> 01:12:59,320
What's wrong with my cooking?
1190
01:12:59,322 --> 01:13:02,293
Please, God, tell me,
what am I doing so wrong?
1191
01:13:06,230 --> 01:13:10,035
Ladies and gentlemen,
that is the end.
1192
01:13:13,507 --> 01:13:14,898
Subtitles by explosiveskull
80345
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
