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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,047 --> 00:00:01,480 Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend... 2 00:00:01,549 --> 00:00:04,834 Thank you. You are really always there when I need someone. 3 00:00:04,859 --> 00:00:07,993 Nathaniel, what you just did meant a lot to me, really. 4 00:00:10,231 --> 00:00:12,175 - You know, we should, uh... - Yeah. I-I should get my stuff. 5 00:00:12,199 --> 00:00:13,799 You're choosing to stay in West Covina? 6 00:00:13,824 --> 00:00:15,148 Because I still care about you. 7 00:00:15,173 --> 00:00:17,164 But I still really care about you, 8 00:00:17,189 --> 00:00:19,656 - like, so much. - Me, too. 9 00:00:20,140 --> 00:00:22,174 Rebecca and I, we're just friends again. 10 00:00:22,199 --> 00:00:23,331 I'm sorry. 11 00:00:30,417 --> 00:00:33,385 ♪ Meet Rebecca ♪ 12 00:00:33,454 --> 00:00:36,555 ♪ She's the coolest girl in the world, wait ♪ 13 00:00:36,624 --> 00:00:39,958 ♪ Wrong Rebecca ♪ 14 00:00:40,027 --> 00:00:42,194 ♪ It's this one over here ♪ 15 00:00:42,263 --> 00:00:45,163 ♪ She's spunky, she's sweet, a generous friend ♪ 16 00:00:45,232 --> 00:00:47,566 ♪ Oh, but there she looks kind of mean ♪ 17 00:00:47,635 --> 00:00:49,268 Hmm. ♪ Okay, she's snarky ♪ 18 00:00:49,336 --> 00:00:51,370 ♪ Sarcastic and a... What? ♪ 19 00:00:51,438 --> 00:00:55,207 ♪ You know, we're not really seeing a common theme ♪ 20 00:00:55,276 --> 00:00:57,776 ♪ Meet Rebecca ♪ 21 00:00:57,845 --> 00:01:00,779 ♪ She's too hard to summarize ♪ 22 00:01:00,848 --> 00:01:03,682 ♪ So let's go back to Other Rebecca. ♪ 23 00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:06,439 Asparagus is my enemy. 24 00:01:06,463 --> 00:01:08,032 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 25 00:01:12,826 --> 00:01:16,061 That community theater thing was just such a disaster. 26 00:01:16,130 --> 00:01:18,563 So humiliating. And it sucks because... 27 00:01:18,702 --> 00:01:20,759 I thought it would make me happy. 28 00:01:21,001 --> 00:01:23,001 What am I supposed to do now? 29 00:01:23,586 --> 00:01:24,748 No, I'm not asking you, butter. 30 00:01:24,773 --> 00:01:26,005 You're never any help. 31 00:01:27,759 --> 00:01:29,141 I talk to butter. It's a thing. 32 00:01:29,584 --> 00:01:32,285 Josh, what do I do with my life? 33 00:01:32,736 --> 00:01:34,517 Seriously. I thought I'd landed on something 34 00:01:34,550 --> 00:01:35,884 with community theater, and it's weird, 35 00:01:35,909 --> 00:01:38,290 because as frustrated and confused as I am, 36 00:01:38,315 --> 00:01:39,681 I feel like I'm close to something. 37 00:01:39,706 --> 00:01:41,840 I just... I just need to fight through the confusion 38 00:01:41,877 --> 00:01:43,509 and focus and not get distracted 39 00:01:43,534 --> 00:01:45,298 by the things that normally blow me off course. 40 00:01:45,323 --> 00:01:46,945 Rebecca, I'm in love with you. 41 00:01:51,056 --> 00:01:52,151 What? 42 00:01:52,539 --> 00:01:54,032 I'm in love with you. 43 00:01:54,587 --> 00:01:56,289 I'm sorry, allow me to shift my focus completely. 44 00:01:56,314 --> 00:01:57,847 Uh, hold on a second. 45 00:01:58,603 --> 00:01:59,536 What? 46 00:02:00,267 --> 00:02:02,362 - I'm in... - No. 47 00:02:02,387 --> 00:02:04,721 I actually heard you. Um... 48 00:02:07,485 --> 00:02:08,929 - What? - I've been feeling 49 00:02:08,954 --> 00:02:11,715 like this for a while now, but I tried to push it aside 50 00:02:11,740 --> 00:02:13,609 because our history is complicated. 51 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,486 But I can't keep it inside anymore. 52 00:02:15,946 --> 00:02:18,197 Rebecca, I saw you almost kiss Nathaniel, 53 00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:19,381 and now I need to know. 54 00:02:19,406 --> 00:02:20,727 Is it him? 55 00:02:21,618 --> 00:02:22,849 Or do I have a chance? 56 00:02:23,422 --> 00:02:25,618 - Late. - What? 57 00:02:26,002 --> 00:02:28,171 I am late for work. I'm late for work. 58 00:02:28,196 --> 00:02:30,212 And this is an important conversation, 59 00:02:30,237 --> 00:02:32,861 but I don't want to rush it, so bye, now. 60 00:02:33,998 --> 00:02:35,664 It's Nathaniel, isn't it? 61 00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:37,236 It's him, isn't it? 62 00:02:45,751 --> 00:02:47,309 Oh, my God. 63 00:02:47,422 --> 00:02:50,431 - Oh, Julia, this view. - Yeah? 64 00:02:50,456 --> 00:02:52,548 Oh, man. At my old firm, Uh-huh. 65 00:02:52,617 --> 00:02:54,303 The view was of an animal clinic, 66 00:02:54,328 --> 00:02:56,929 a body shop and an online tuxedo rental place, 67 00:02:56,954 --> 00:02:59,588 - so this is amazing. - Well, I'm glad you like it, 68 00:02:59,657 --> 00:03:01,457 because we are very happy to have you here. 69 00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:03,115 I want you to meet the team. Guys. 70 00:03:03,271 --> 00:03:05,605 So, this is Lisa, Melanie, Malcolm and Craig. 71 00:03:05,962 --> 00:03:07,463 Oh, hi. Wow. 72 00:03:07,532 --> 00:03:10,487 You are all super groomed. 73 00:03:10,512 --> 00:03:11,878 Just keeping it tight. 74 00:03:11,903 --> 00:03:13,636 I love it. 75 00:03:13,704 --> 00:03:15,271 Not a Tim in the bunch. 76 00:03:15,382 --> 00:03:17,216 Oh. Thanks, guys. I'll see you later. 77 00:03:17,241 --> 00:03:19,608 - Every single one of them a superstar. - Oh. 78 00:03:19,677 --> 00:03:21,844 Okay, so we have some documents for you to sign. 79 00:03:21,913 --> 00:03:24,246 - Okay. - And, uh, once you're done signing them, 80 00:03:24,315 --> 00:03:25,981 I can, uh, take you to accounting 81 00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:27,673 and give you your signing bonus. 82 00:03:28,321 --> 00:03:30,953 Wait. Today? 83 00:03:31,158 --> 00:03:32,134 Yeah. 84 00:03:32,282 --> 00:03:34,123 Uh... 85 00:03:34,192 --> 00:03:37,126 I'm gonna get a check for $10,000 today? 86 00:03:37,151 --> 00:03:38,884 - Yes. - Okay. Well, I just... 87 00:03:38,909 --> 00:03:41,674 I-I thought you would sprinkle that bonus over a few weeks. 88 00:03:41,699 --> 00:03:43,032 Actually, you know what? 89 00:03:43,057 --> 00:03:44,168 It's such a small amount that we could even 90 00:03:44,193 --> 00:03:45,259 give it to you in cash. 91 00:03:45,284 --> 00:03:48,686 - Sound good? - Uh, sure. 92 00:03:49,111 --> 00:03:50,883 I love you. You are beautiful. 93 00:03:51,010 --> 00:03:52,119 Oh. 94 00:03:52,337 --> 00:03:53,970 Almost as beautiful as your suit. 95 00:03:55,580 --> 00:03:58,314 I love that suit. Where did you get that? 96 00:03:58,339 --> 00:04:00,439 Oh, this? This is Fett Regoso Couture. 97 00:04:00,464 --> 00:04:01,530 I love them. 98 00:04:01,555 --> 00:04:03,088 I have one for every day of the week. 99 00:04:03,287 --> 00:04:05,487 It's the unofficial office uniform. 100 00:04:05,681 --> 00:04:08,212 Uniform. Okay. Cool. 101 00:04:08,237 --> 00:04:09,736 Oh, it makes us feel like a team. 102 00:04:09,761 --> 00:04:11,384 Like the Yankees or the Rockettes. 103 00:04:11,479 --> 00:04:13,212 Well, I like both those things. 104 00:04:13,237 --> 00:04:14,581 Just a little something that we do. 105 00:04:14,606 --> 00:04:16,309 We do. Yes. And I am we. 106 00:04:16,334 --> 00:04:18,367 And so all are we together. 107 00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:20,258 And so I will with the suits. 108 00:04:20,746 --> 00:04:21,728 Right? 109 00:04:27,578 --> 00:04:30,412 Hey, most beautiful wife in the world. 110 00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:31,947 Oh, hey. 111 00:04:31,972 --> 00:04:34,189 You're coming to my workplace with compliments? 112 00:04:34,356 --> 00:04:35,789 Yeah, can I borrow your keys? 113 00:04:36,189 --> 00:04:37,663 Not because I lost mine, 114 00:04:37,688 --> 00:04:39,255 but because I like the sound they make 115 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:40,413 when they jangle together. 116 00:04:40,438 --> 00:04:42,301 And I'm looking for interesting sounds to sample 117 00:04:42,326 --> 00:04:44,693 for those SoundCloud hip-hop songs I've been making. 118 00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:46,017 You lost your keys again. 119 00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:47,426 - Indeed, yes. - Yeah. 120 00:04:47,676 --> 00:04:49,527 Uh, here, I made you an extra set. 121 00:04:50,306 --> 00:04:52,078 I actually made you four extra sets 122 00:04:52,103 --> 00:04:54,003 because, yeah, for next time. 123 00:04:54,115 --> 00:04:56,739 - There won't be a next time. - I'll see you next time. 124 00:04:57,262 --> 00:04:59,208 Hey, sorry. 125 00:04:59,233 --> 00:05:00,498 No, don't worry. I handled it. 126 00:05:00,523 --> 00:05:02,757 I know you're not, like, trying to stress me out. 127 00:05:02,782 --> 00:05:04,315 Oh, I would never do that. 128 00:05:04,340 --> 00:05:05,673 I know. 129 00:05:05,916 --> 00:05:07,449 Oh! 130 00:05:07,518 --> 00:05:09,551 Oh, man. 131 00:05:09,576 --> 00:05:10,942 - Uh-huh. - Got your phone wet. 132 00:05:10,967 --> 00:05:12,833 - Yep. - Sorry. 133 00:05:12,990 --> 00:05:15,024 Also, I needed your phone to call an Uber. 134 00:05:15,707 --> 00:05:17,652 Yeah. That tracks. 135 00:05:17,677 --> 00:05:20,806 I hear you. You want me to propose. I'm not ready. 136 00:05:20,831 --> 00:05:23,076 How much longer are we gonna argue about this? Until I have 137 00:05:23,100 --> 00:05:24,500 something oval cut on my finger. 138 00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:25,978 Oh, my God. Why can't you 139 00:05:26,003 --> 00:05:27,436 just let me have this? 140 00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:29,661 I love you, I want us to spend our lives together, 141 00:05:29,686 --> 00:05:31,686 and I've always dreamed about being a bride. 142 00:05:31,867 --> 00:05:34,310 Right. And is this part of what you always dreamed of? 143 00:05:34,378 --> 00:05:36,578 Bullying the person you love into proposing? 144 00:05:36,851 --> 00:05:38,924 Yes. Isn't it magical? 145 00:05:38,949 --> 00:05:40,582 Say it's magical. 146 00:05:40,651 --> 00:05:43,385 You're going through a thing that has nothing to do with me. 147 00:05:43,540 --> 00:05:45,367 And I don't want to fight about it anymore. 148 00:05:45,843 --> 00:05:47,556 I'm going home to New York, Valencia. 149 00:05:47,976 --> 00:05:49,359 Are you coming with me? 150 00:05:57,157 --> 00:05:58,429 Fine. 151 00:06:01,038 --> 00:06:02,071 Get out. 152 00:06:02,096 --> 00:06:04,997 - Josh said what? - Yeah. Yeah. 153 00:06:05,538 --> 00:06:06,786 I didn't know what to say. 154 00:06:06,811 --> 00:06:08,255 I mean, a few years ago, I would have killed 155 00:06:08,279 --> 00:06:09,559 to hear him say that. Literally. 156 00:06:09,613 --> 00:06:10,957 I almost killed someone's cat because of him. 157 00:06:10,981 --> 00:06:12,881 In fairness, he almost killed me 158 00:06:12,906 --> 00:06:14,439 by letting me fall into a carnival pit. 159 00:06:14,464 --> 00:06:16,152 Ugh, they have to fill that carnival pit. 160 00:06:16,187 --> 00:06:17,553 I almost lost a nephew. 161 00:06:17,665 --> 00:06:19,632 Just makes it so hard to love that carnival. 162 00:06:19,657 --> 00:06:21,490 But I do. I do love that carnival. 163 00:06:21,559 --> 00:06:23,559 Anyway, how do you feel about Josh now? 164 00:06:23,671 --> 00:06:25,304 Or Greg? Or Nathaniel? 165 00:06:25,373 --> 00:06:26,572 I honestly don't know. 166 00:06:26,597 --> 00:06:28,564 I just can't believe this is still happening. 167 00:06:28,812 --> 00:06:31,467 It's-it's so painful and exhausting. 168 00:06:31,492 --> 00:06:33,046 Yeah, I get it. It sucks. 169 00:06:33,070 --> 00:06:34,903 You have three gorgeous men to choose from. 170 00:06:35,016 --> 00:06:36,182 All of my matches on Tinder 171 00:06:36,207 --> 00:06:37,451 are grifters from the Czech Republic, 172 00:06:37,475 --> 00:06:39,875 but you're right. You have a huge problem. 173 00:06:39,944 --> 00:06:41,643 Problem? What problem? Oh. 174 00:06:41,712 --> 00:06:43,278 I'm sorry. I've just been standing here 175 00:06:43,303 --> 00:06:44,724 waiting for a cinnamon raisin. 176 00:06:44,749 --> 00:06:47,316 Darryl, have you ever had to make a really difficult decision 177 00:06:47,341 --> 00:06:48,894 and you didn't know what to do? 178 00:06:48,919 --> 00:06:51,754 Say there are three equally viable options. 179 00:06:51,822 --> 00:06:54,757 Me? All the time. I struggle a lot with decisions. 180 00:06:54,869 --> 00:06:56,335 So much so that I made a study 181 00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:58,394 about how to compare options. 182 00:06:58,820 --> 00:07:00,339 Yeah, I read books, 183 00:07:00,364 --> 00:07:03,098 listened to podcasts and TED Talks, 184 00:07:03,398 --> 00:07:04,744 and I have developed 185 00:07:04,769 --> 00:07:07,035 a very effective and foolproof system. 186 00:07:07,304 --> 00:07:08,180 It's hard to explain. 187 00:07:08,205 --> 00:07:09,781 It's easier if I show you. 188 00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:12,508 This is your system? 189 00:07:12,576 --> 00:07:14,109 This is just columns. 190 00:07:14,265 --> 00:07:16,553 Ooh. Columns. Ooh, that is good. 191 00:07:16,578 --> 00:07:18,190 I've been trying to come up with a name. 192 00:07:18,258 --> 00:07:19,458 Okay, let's look 193 00:07:19,483 --> 00:07:20,894 at the Nathaniel column first. All right. 194 00:07:21,195 --> 00:07:23,013 We have "charming, 195 00:07:23,038 --> 00:07:25,459 "handsome, smart, 196 00:07:25,484 --> 00:07:27,833 chemistry off the charts." Yeah. 197 00:07:27,858 --> 00:07:31,093 "Amazing in the sack." And now "evolved." 198 00:07:31,161 --> 00:07:32,471 I mean, really, he has the approval 199 00:07:32,496 --> 00:07:34,640 of the women in the county jail. 200 00:07:34,665 --> 00:07:37,433 That's impossible. They're only so-so on Beyoncé. 201 00:07:38,484 --> 00:07:39,787 Okay. 202 00:07:39,812 --> 00:07:41,947 Maybe it is Nathaniel, right? 203 00:07:41,972 --> 00:07:43,439 Yeah, but look at the Josh column. 204 00:07:43,507 --> 00:07:44,751 "Affectionate, emotionally available, 205 00:07:44,775 --> 00:07:47,771 incredible bod, understands my inner child." 206 00:07:47,796 --> 00:07:49,855 And now "evolved." 207 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:51,613 And, of course, "amazing in the sack." 208 00:07:51,726 --> 00:07:55,162 Yeah. And, God, I mean, if I ended up with Josh, 209 00:07:55,187 --> 00:07:57,499 that would make a certain sense. I did move here for him. 210 00:07:58,055 --> 00:08:01,023 Maybe it is Josh. 211 00:08:01,134 --> 00:08:04,503 Maybe, but now let's mosey our eyes over to the Greg list. 212 00:08:04,571 --> 00:08:06,505 - Mm. - And we've got "forgiveness." 213 00:08:06,530 --> 00:08:08,248 Of course, since, Jesus-like, 214 00:08:08,273 --> 00:08:10,643 he forgave you for bopping his pop. 215 00:08:10,668 --> 00:08:12,000 - Oh, gross. - You did it. 216 00:08:12,113 --> 00:08:13,546 - He just said it. - Mm-hmm. 217 00:08:13,571 --> 00:08:15,838 And then you wrote "smart, compassionate, funny, 218 00:08:15,906 --> 00:08:17,439 "foxy A.H., surprising 219 00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:19,652 and seems to understand me in some profound way." 220 00:08:19,677 --> 00:08:21,477 Also, "amazing in the sack." 221 00:08:21,545 --> 00:08:23,843 - That seems to be a constant. - Mm-hmm. 222 00:08:23,868 --> 00:08:25,704 Yes, I've been blessed with gifted lovers. 223 00:08:25,816 --> 00:08:27,683 Well, to be fair, I've taught them well. 224 00:08:28,001 --> 00:08:31,770 Guys, maybe it is Greg. 225 00:08:32,653 --> 00:08:34,570 Maybe it is Nathaniel. 226 00:08:35,737 --> 00:08:37,069 Maybe it is Josh. 227 00:08:37,094 --> 00:08:40,140 Oh, my God. This is just... This is terrible. 228 00:08:40,796 --> 00:08:42,741 I can't believe this is happening again 229 00:08:42,766 --> 00:08:44,195 and that I'm back in a... . 230 00:08:45,616 --> 00:08:46,945 Oh, God. 231 00:08:49,437 --> 00:08:51,531 I'm coming, I'm coming. I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready. 232 00:08:52,516 --> 00:08:56,417 ♪ What's a girl to do when she's back here again? ♪ 233 00:08:56,442 --> 00:09:00,678 ♪ After so much growth, she's still stuck between men ♪ 234 00:09:00,747 --> 00:09:02,680 ♪ So sweep off the sets ♪ 235 00:09:02,749 --> 00:09:04,582 ♪ Good, you found the old swing... ♪ 236 00:09:04,650 --> 00:09:05,549 Just put it anywhere. That's cool. 237 00:09:05,618 --> 00:09:07,894 ♪ Let's see if I remember ♪ 238 00:09:07,919 --> 00:09:09,919 ♪ The words to sing ♪ 239 00:09:10,399 --> 00:09:11,999 ♪ I'm back here again ♪ 240 00:09:12,024 --> 00:09:13,758 ♪ Oh, boy, what fun ♪ 241 00:09:13,783 --> 00:09:16,058 ♪ Guess it's time to make up ♪ 242 00:09:16,083 --> 00:09:21,090 ♪ More geometry puns ♪ 243 00:09:24,641 --> 00:09:27,108 ♪ The math of love quadrangles ♪ 244 00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:29,467 ♪ Is way more fun than trig ♪ 245 00:09:29,492 --> 00:09:32,186 ♪ But what about your feelings? ♪ 246 00:09:32,211 --> 00:09:34,933 ♪ Hmm, we don't see those on a fig ♪ 247 00:09:34,958 --> 00:09:36,925 ♪ The math of love quadrangles ♪ 248 00:09:37,231 --> 00:09:39,097 ♪ Is so juicy while it lasts ♪ 249 00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:41,262 ♪ I can't ask you to share ♪ 250 00:09:41,287 --> 00:09:42,953 ♪ Come on, don't be a square ♪ 251 00:09:42,978 --> 00:09:45,312 ♪ I thought all this drama was back in my past ♪ 252 00:09:45,337 --> 00:09:48,325 ♪ Joke's on you, bitch ♪ ♪ You'll never be free. ♪ 253 00:09:48,580 --> 00:09:50,080 No! 254 00:09:51,374 --> 00:09:52,540 Sorry. 255 00:09:52,565 --> 00:09:55,152 I-I was figuring something out in my head. 256 00:09:55,177 --> 00:09:57,311 Guys, my life is a disaster. 257 00:09:57,336 --> 00:09:59,470 And not just my love life. It feels like everything. 258 00:09:59,539 --> 00:10:01,739 I-I can't go on like this. What do I do? 259 00:10:04,510 --> 00:10:05,910 Huh, a FaceTime from David. 260 00:10:05,978 --> 00:10:07,378 That's Audra Levine's husband. 261 00:10:07,446 --> 00:10:08,579 Hmm. 262 00:10:08,648 --> 00:10:09,980 Yeah, hi, David. 263 00:10:10,049 --> 00:10:11,535 Rebecca, Audra needs your help. 264 00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:13,324 Audra Levine needs my help? Why? 265 00:10:13,349 --> 00:10:14,909 She abandoned me and the triplets. 266 00:10:15,021 --> 00:10:16,220 She went to Las Vegas 267 00:10:16,245 --> 00:10:17,422 last week for a bachelorette trip, 268 00:10:17,447 --> 00:10:18,513 and she hasn't come back. 269 00:10:18,902 --> 00:10:20,574 I need someone to bring her back, 270 00:10:20,599 --> 00:10:22,677 and I can't ask someone who's actually a part of our lives 271 00:10:22,716 --> 00:10:24,377 or whose opinion matters at all. 272 00:10:24,402 --> 00:10:25,887 So will you help me? 273 00:10:25,996 --> 00:10:27,307 According to the credit card bill, 274 00:10:27,331 --> 00:10:29,433 she's still at the Casa Majestic Casino. 275 00:10:30,203 --> 00:10:32,811 Wow, this is terrible news. I mean, 276 00:10:32,836 --> 00:10:34,557 Audra Levine has abandoned 277 00:10:34,582 --> 00:10:37,506 her mature, adult life and holed up 278 00:10:37,531 --> 00:10:39,550 in an off-brand Vegas casino? 279 00:10:39,575 --> 00:10:41,075 Well, this is sad. 280 00:10:41,144 --> 00:10:43,043 - This is so sad. - Rebecca, I... 281 00:10:43,112 --> 00:10:44,512 I can see you smiling. 282 00:10:44,537 --> 00:10:46,480 This is FaceTime. We're on FaceTime. Sorry. 283 00:10:46,505 --> 00:10:49,460 Is there any chance that-that you would go to Vegas 284 00:10:49,485 --> 00:10:51,218 a-and bring her back home? 285 00:10:51,287 --> 00:10:53,277 I know that you're probably really busy 286 00:10:53,302 --> 00:10:54,488 and have way more important things 287 00:10:54,513 --> 00:10:55,668 - that you could be doing... - Yeah. 288 00:10:55,693 --> 00:10:58,285 Yeah, I do have way better things to be doing. 289 00:10:58,310 --> 00:11:00,310 I'm actually making a very big decision now 290 00:11:00,335 --> 00:11:01,839 in my amazing life. 291 00:11:01,864 --> 00:11:03,230 Uh... 292 00:11:03,343 --> 00:11:04,909 But you know what? 293 00:11:04,978 --> 00:11:06,511 This is more important. 294 00:11:06,536 --> 00:11:07,754 So yes, David. 295 00:11:07,779 --> 00:11:10,638 I will go. You can count on me, as always. 296 00:11:10,663 --> 00:11:12,497 Oh, good. Oh, thank you so much. 297 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:14,838 Oh, boy. Well, I guess the 298 00:11:14,863 --> 00:11:16,738 - columns have to wait. - What? 299 00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:18,430 No, the columns wait for no one. 300 00:11:18,463 --> 00:11:20,512 Ooh, that is a good slogan. 301 00:11:20,644 --> 00:11:23,144 Guys, you heard David. Audra needs me. 302 00:11:23,635 --> 00:11:25,535 Or you want to procrastinate on your decision 303 00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:26,993 and see your frenemy at her lowest 304 00:11:27,018 --> 00:11:29,051 so you can feel superior and rub it in a little. 305 00:11:29,871 --> 00:11:31,536 AJ, you're a damn bitch. 306 00:11:31,561 --> 00:11:33,293 Thank you. 307 00:11:34,173 --> 00:11:35,606 This counts as overtime. 308 00:11:35,631 --> 00:11:37,097 - Does it? - Mm-hmm. 309 00:11:39,902 --> 00:11:42,465 Hector is like having a kid sometimes. 310 00:11:42,490 --> 00:11:45,163 It's like having a kid before I have a kid. 311 00:11:45,318 --> 00:11:47,590 Other than the kid I gave birth to, which doesn't count. 312 00:11:47,615 --> 00:11:49,137 At least you're married. 313 00:11:49,162 --> 00:11:51,823 Beth left town and didn't even answer my ultimatum. 314 00:11:51,848 --> 00:11:53,301 I thought the whole point of an ultimatum 315 00:11:53,326 --> 00:11:55,360 was trapping someone into giving you an answer. 316 00:11:55,385 --> 00:11:57,774 - Mm... - Good thing Paula's happy. 317 00:11:58,131 --> 00:11:59,597 I really am. 318 00:11:59,622 --> 00:12:01,088 Oh. I'm sorry. 319 00:12:01,113 --> 00:12:03,713 Mmm. But the people at my firm are so nice. 320 00:12:04,238 --> 00:12:06,204 I mean, I thought they were gonna be snooty 321 00:12:06,229 --> 00:12:07,561 and that I wouldn't fit in, 322 00:12:07,586 --> 00:12:10,120 but, you know, now that I've been there... 323 00:12:10,233 --> 00:12:11,966 It's basically perfect. 324 00:12:12,034 --> 00:12:13,601 All I have to do is get me 325 00:12:13,626 --> 00:12:16,371 one of them suits, and then I will be one of them. 326 00:12:16,396 --> 00:12:17,682 Mmm. I'm gonna see 327 00:12:17,707 --> 00:12:18,839 how much they cost. 328 00:12:18,864 --> 00:12:21,431 You know, they're probably pretty expensive. 329 00:12:21,456 --> 00:12:22,722 Yeah. At least, like, 330 00:12:22,747 --> 00:12:24,388 three or four hundred... 331 00:12:24,413 --> 00:12:25,813 Oh, my God! 332 00:12:25,838 --> 00:12:29,927 The jacket alone is $8,000! 333 00:12:29,952 --> 00:12:31,252 Oh. Um... 334 00:12:31,363 --> 00:12:32,763 That's almost my whole bonus. 335 00:12:32,788 --> 00:12:34,900 And that money was supposed to pay off our credit cards. 336 00:12:34,924 --> 00:12:36,991 And we need a new roof on the house. 337 00:12:37,422 --> 00:12:38,369 Oh, cool. 338 00:12:38,394 --> 00:12:39,760 So we're all kind of miserable. 339 00:12:39,785 --> 00:12:41,318 This will be a cool lunch. 340 00:12:41,766 --> 00:12:42,940 Hey, ladies. I'm sorry. 341 00:12:42,965 --> 00:12:44,309 I can't make lunch. There's an emergency. 342 00:12:44,333 --> 00:12:45,666 I have to go save a life. 343 00:12:45,735 --> 00:12:47,375 Anyway, I just came here to tell you that. 344 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:48,499 Seems like a text. 345 00:12:48,524 --> 00:12:50,202 Also, sometimes you just don't show up at all, 346 00:12:50,227 --> 00:12:51,560 which also would have been fine. 347 00:12:51,707 --> 00:12:53,118 Look, to be honest, I have to go to Vegas, 348 00:12:53,142 --> 00:12:54,286 and I really don't want to go alone. 349 00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:55,590 Does anyone want to come with me? 350 00:12:57,747 --> 00:13:00,907 Let's see, babysit my husband or go to Vegas? 351 00:13:01,065 --> 00:13:04,533 Let's see, get rejected again or go to Vegas? 352 00:13:04,558 --> 00:13:06,264 Vegas? I can turn that ten grand 353 00:13:06,289 --> 00:13:08,722 into 50 Fett Regoso suits and a new roof. 354 00:13:08,747 --> 00:13:09,613 - What? - Nothing. 355 00:13:09,641 --> 00:13:11,094 Just being supportive. Let's go! 356 00:13:11,119 --> 00:13:13,119 - Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm so in. - Oh, awesome. - Okay. 357 00:13:13,529 --> 00:13:16,310 Oh, um, we just can't go to the Bellagio or the MGM. 358 00:13:16,335 --> 00:13:18,001 It's a... You know, it's a long story. 359 00:13:24,798 --> 00:13:26,798 Ah. 360 00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:30,575 Sir. 361 00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:33,478 Hey, buddy. I need you to stand down. 362 00:13:33,591 --> 00:13:35,791 - Literally what do you mean? - You heard me. 363 00:13:35,816 --> 00:13:37,282 Stand down. 364 00:13:37,307 --> 00:13:40,442 This morning, I declared to Rebecca that I care about her. 365 00:13:40,467 --> 00:13:41,897 I cared about her before you did. 366 00:13:41,922 --> 00:13:43,922 You cared about her at the theater the other day, 367 00:13:44,034 --> 00:13:45,734 but before that, I cared about her, 368 00:13:45,759 --> 00:13:47,659 like when we moved in together. 369 00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:49,627 But before that, yes, it was you. 370 00:13:49,696 --> 00:13:51,216 But before that, we almost got married. 371 00:13:51,264 --> 00:13:54,098 And, yes, before that, you guys kissed in the elevator, 372 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:55,645 but before that, at summer camp, it was me. 373 00:13:55,670 --> 00:13:59,008 So I say to you, sir... stand down. 374 00:13:59,033 --> 00:14:00,833 Oh. Huh. 375 00:14:01,141 --> 00:14:03,899 I'm not gonna do that. That's not something people do. 376 00:14:04,054 --> 00:14:05,387 You made 377 00:14:05,412 --> 00:14:07,579 a declaration to Rebecca. I get it. 378 00:14:07,604 --> 00:14:09,304 You're talking to the king of declarations. 379 00:14:09,329 --> 00:14:11,529 Look, if someone made a supercut of all the times 380 00:14:11,554 --> 00:14:15,977 I declared my love to Rebecca, it would be... long. 381 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,022 Regardless, I can't... 382 00:14:18,047 --> 00:14:20,014 To use your parlance... Stand down, 383 00:14:20,039 --> 00:14:22,273 because honestly, I think Rebecca and I, 384 00:14:22,298 --> 00:14:25,532 some way, somehow, have a chance to be together. 385 00:14:25,557 --> 00:14:28,677 Well, then, we have a problem, because we clearly both believe 386 00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:30,352 that we're who she's meant to be with. 387 00:14:30,415 --> 00:14:34,050 One of has to be wrong. One of us has to be... 388 00:14:34,850 --> 00:14:36,243 Josh? 389 00:14:37,344 --> 00:14:39,210 Did you just forget your name, buddy? 390 00:14:39,235 --> 00:14:41,168 What? Oh. 391 00:14:41,193 --> 00:14:42,860 My name's on that whiteboard. 392 00:14:43,405 --> 00:14:44,504 AJ? 393 00:14:44,699 --> 00:14:47,099 AJ, why is my name on that whiteboard? 394 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,641 Uh... 395 00:14:49,964 --> 00:14:52,500 You have... detention. 396 00:14:52,869 --> 00:14:54,969 Nathaniel, your name's up there, too. 397 00:14:56,496 --> 00:14:58,663 Yeah, uh... No, I... Oh. 398 00:14:58,732 --> 00:15:00,899 - Uh... - AJ? 399 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:08,180 Greg? 400 00:15:08,205 --> 00:15:09,771 It's me, you and Greg? 401 00:15:09,796 --> 00:15:11,586 And it looks like she's really torn, 402 00:15:11,611 --> 00:15:14,279 like she doesn't even know who she wants to be with. 403 00:15:14,340 --> 00:15:17,308 Oh. Huh. 404 00:15:17,471 --> 00:15:19,170 I don't like this. 405 00:15:19,195 --> 00:15:22,129 I'm asking you nicely to get out of my kitchen. 406 00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:24,121 This is how customers get meningitis. 407 00:15:24,391 --> 00:15:26,024 Wow. I got a lot to think about. 408 00:15:26,049 --> 00:15:27,954 I thought it was just you, which was bad enough. 409 00:15:29,473 --> 00:15:30,772 Yeah, you know what? 410 00:15:30,841 --> 00:15:33,461 I don't want to be a part of a weird horse race, okay? 411 00:15:33,486 --> 00:15:35,987 You know what? I'm standing down. 412 00:15:36,319 --> 00:15:38,353 And I... 413 00:15:38,767 --> 00:15:41,067 I shall do samesies. 414 00:15:44,566 --> 00:15:47,200 ♪ ♪ 415 00:15:51,195 --> 00:15:53,695 Ah. Okay, we're here. 416 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:58,189 And can I just say I feel like a badass right now? 417 00:15:58,214 --> 00:15:59,594 Yeah, totally. Me, too. 418 00:15:59,619 --> 00:16:01,586 Yeah. Okay. 419 00:16:01,611 --> 00:16:05,680 We're four badass chicks walking into a casino. 420 00:16:05,705 --> 00:16:08,008 I think we know what needs to happen now. 421 00:16:08,847 --> 00:16:10,847 ♪ ♪ 422 00:16:13,214 --> 00:16:15,814 ♪ Slow motion, slow motion ♪ 423 00:16:15,867 --> 00:16:18,367 ♪ We walkin' in the room in slow motion ♪ 424 00:16:18,392 --> 00:16:20,793 ♪ Slow motion, slow motion ♪ 425 00:16:20,843 --> 00:16:22,943 ♪ That's how cool we feel ♪ 426 00:16:22,968 --> 00:16:25,936 ♪ Looking this good should be a crime ♪ 427 00:16:25,961 --> 00:16:28,495 ♪ 'Cause my girls and I be stoppin' time ♪ 428 00:16:28,533 --> 00:16:30,833 ♪ Oh, my God, we're so hot ♪ 429 00:16:30,888 --> 00:16:32,755 ♪ Even blinking looks amazing ♪ 430 00:16:32,916 --> 00:16:34,516 - Slay! - ♪ If only life ♪ 431 00:16:34,603 --> 00:16:36,202 ♪ Were as good as this feels ♪ 432 00:16:36,227 --> 00:16:38,728 ♪ Let's make the slow motion real ♪ 433 00:16:42,721 --> 00:16:44,087 This is much harder than I thought. 434 00:16:44,112 --> 00:16:45,712 This is not... it's not working, right? 435 00:16:45,781 --> 00:16:47,380 Yeah. Feels like I'm doing some weird... 436 00:16:47,405 --> 00:16:49,171 - Okay, let's just go... - Yeah. Okay. Yeah. 437 00:16:49,181 --> 00:16:50,981 ♪ Back to fantasy slow motion ♪ 438 00:16:51,006 --> 00:16:52,472 ♪ Slow motion ♪ 439 00:16:52,497 --> 00:16:54,464 ♪ Don't talk to us, we're in slow motion ♪ 440 00:16:54,489 --> 00:16:57,056 ♪ Slow motion, slow motion ♪ 441 00:16:57,081 --> 00:16:59,882 ♪ Fine, the MGM's across the street ♪ 442 00:17:00,125 --> 00:17:01,469 ♪ Don't have bills to pay ♪ 443 00:17:01,493 --> 00:17:02,859 ♪ In slow motion ♪ 444 00:17:02,928 --> 00:17:04,039 ♪ Problems go away ♪ 445 00:17:04,063 --> 00:17:05,495 ♪ In slow motion ♪ 446 00:17:05,564 --> 00:17:07,242 ♪ If you're stressed, why not take a trip ♪ 447 00:17:07,310 --> 00:17:09,543 ♪ To 48 frames per second? ♪ 448 00:17:09,568 --> 00:17:10,879 - Yaas! - ♪ Oh, no ♪ 449 00:17:10,903 --> 00:17:12,803 ♪ Our entrance is almost over ♪ 450 00:17:12,828 --> 00:17:15,195 ♪ Let's go even slower ♪ 451 00:17:21,613 --> 00:17:25,082 Not sure this works. 452 00:17:25,150 --> 00:17:28,852 Agreed. 453 00:17:30,422 --> 00:17:33,690 ♪ Back to normal fantasy slow motion, slow motion ♪ 454 00:17:33,759 --> 00:17:35,847 ♪ It went from sexy to boring slow motion ♪ 455 00:17:35,872 --> 00:17:38,639 ♪ Slow motion, slow motion ♪ 456 00:17:38,664 --> 00:17:40,630 ♪ Whatever you do, don't sneeze ♪ 457 00:17:40,699 --> 00:17:42,866 ♪ But definitely look to the side ♪ 458 00:17:42,935 --> 00:17:45,402 ♪ Flip your hair, put on sunglasses ♪ 459 00:17:45,427 --> 00:17:50,697 ♪ Take off the sunglasses and just hold them, I guess ♪ 460 00:17:55,981 --> 00:17:58,853 ♪ Slow motion, slow motion ♪ 461 00:17:59,236 --> 00:18:00,961 ♪ Damn, we're out of room. ♪ 462 00:18:00,986 --> 00:18:02,119 Oh. 463 00:18:02,187 --> 00:18:03,487 Bless you. Oh, thank you. 464 00:18:03,555 --> 00:18:05,422 Oh, that was actually a relatively short walk 465 00:18:05,491 --> 00:18:07,891 - to the reception desk. - It felt a lot longer. Yeah. 466 00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:09,775 - Hi. - Hi. 467 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,478 I was wondering if you could tell me, uh, 468 00:18:11,503 --> 00:18:12,702 what room is Audra Levine in? 469 00:18:12,865 --> 00:18:14,098 We don't give out room numbers 470 00:18:14,123 --> 00:18:15,623 to protect the privacy of our guests. 471 00:18:15,868 --> 00:18:18,368 I thought you'd say that, but listen, this is an emergency. 472 00:18:18,437 --> 00:18:19,569 - Hey. - Mm. Mm-hmm? 473 00:18:19,638 --> 00:18:21,705 - Did I see pai gow on the floor? - Mm-hmm. 474 00:18:21,774 --> 00:18:23,473 Because I'm actually here to see... 475 00:18:23,542 --> 00:18:24,941 Hi. We're with 476 00:18:25,010 --> 00:18:26,521 the Martinez bachelorette. Is there any way 477 00:18:26,545 --> 00:18:27,644 we can change rooms? 478 00:18:27,669 --> 00:18:30,197 We came here to have a good time. We brought Molly. 479 00:18:30,222 --> 00:18:33,116 Yeah, Molly's our friend, and she brought drugs. 480 00:18:33,141 --> 00:18:36,008 But the woman next door to us is really harshing our vibe. 481 00:18:36,165 --> 00:18:39,533 Yeah, she keeps yelling, "Sheket bevakasha," at us 482 00:18:39,558 --> 00:18:41,758 and referring to herself as an alpha bitch. 483 00:18:41,827 --> 00:18:44,127 That's our girl. Hey, what room's the bitch in again? 484 00:18:44,196 --> 00:18:46,296 - 428. - Room 428. Come on, let's go. 485 00:18:46,365 --> 00:18:49,099 Hey, it looks like they have Caribbean stud. 486 00:18:49,124 --> 00:18:50,957 Interesting. 487 00:18:55,707 --> 00:18:58,108 Ugh. Rebecca Bunch. 488 00:18:58,580 --> 00:19:00,120 What are you doing here? 489 00:19:00,145 --> 00:19:01,378 David called me. 490 00:19:01,447 --> 00:19:03,447 - Uh, what? - Mm-hmm. 491 00:19:03,978 --> 00:19:05,058 Oh. Hello. 492 00:19:05,126 --> 00:19:06,326 Okay, everyone. 493 00:19:06,351 --> 00:19:07,484 Oh. Someone's living large. 494 00:19:07,553 --> 00:19:09,197 Hey, living your best life. It's very nice. 495 00:19:09,221 --> 00:19:11,087 - Nice. - Yeah. 496 00:19:12,346 --> 00:19:13,467 David called you? 497 00:19:13,955 --> 00:19:15,054 Wow. 498 00:19:15,079 --> 00:19:16,275 He must really be desperate. 499 00:19:16,300 --> 00:19:17,733 You know what? He's concerned, 500 00:19:17,758 --> 00:19:18,689 because he needs you to come home, 501 00:19:18,714 --> 00:19:21,060 and your three children need you to come home. 502 00:19:21,502 --> 00:19:23,095 What do you care? 503 00:19:23,705 --> 00:19:26,005 I mean, we've known each other our whole lives. 504 00:19:26,030 --> 00:19:28,103 And I care about you in my own way. 505 00:19:28,128 --> 00:19:29,767 You're like an annoying family member. 506 00:19:29,815 --> 00:19:31,338 And then I told my friends about your situation, 507 00:19:31,363 --> 00:19:33,096 and they selflessly agreed to come help. 508 00:19:33,121 --> 00:19:33,939 Exactly. 509 00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:35,572 Females helping females. 510 00:19:35,597 --> 00:19:37,525 And that's called sisterhood. 511 00:19:39,245 --> 00:19:41,245 Okay, fine. 512 00:19:41,610 --> 00:19:42,955 You win. 513 00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:46,838 I mean, there's nothing keeping me in Las Vegas anyway. 514 00:19:46,863 --> 00:19:48,564 I just needed a little break. 515 00:19:48,636 --> 00:19:50,770 You've all done your good deed for the day. 516 00:19:51,033 --> 00:19:53,033 I'm gonna go pack. 517 00:19:54,743 --> 00:19:57,853 Wow. That... worked. 518 00:19:58,267 --> 00:19:59,494 Yeah, it did. 519 00:19:59,519 --> 00:20:03,173 And now we can go home, back to our lives. 520 00:20:03,198 --> 00:20:06,658 And the, uh... the choices that come with those lives. 521 00:20:06,697 --> 00:20:09,097 Yeah, and it's-it's not like we want to stay for a little bit 522 00:20:09,122 --> 00:20:11,992 and sit in on a few blackjack hands or anything, right? 523 00:20:13,174 --> 00:20:15,775 What? 524 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,100 She's gone. 525 00:20:17,125 --> 00:20:18,058 We got a runner. 526 00:20:18,083 --> 00:20:19,183 - Oh, no. - So sad. 527 00:20:19,208 --> 00:20:20,808 We can't leave yet. 528 00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:33,047 Oh, see? Look at that. 529 00:20:33,116 --> 00:20:34,260 Those two people are in love. 530 00:20:34,284 --> 00:20:35,828 I bet they don't have any issues with... 531 00:20:35,852 --> 00:20:37,185 commitment. 532 00:20:37,254 --> 00:20:38,386 Audra?! 533 00:20:38,498 --> 00:20:41,132 Oh, my God, stop following me. 534 00:20:41,157 --> 00:20:43,258 Oh, babe, who are these chicks? 535 00:20:43,326 --> 00:20:45,260 I'm not usually up for three-ways. 536 00:20:46,607 --> 00:20:48,407 But the redhead can stay. 537 00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:51,113 Audra, who is this guy? 538 00:20:51,790 --> 00:20:53,534 This is... 539 00:20:53,603 --> 00:20:55,570 Jesse. 540 00:20:55,639 --> 00:20:58,039 Can't spell "Jesus" without "Jesse." 541 00:20:58,108 --> 00:20:59,907 Yes, you... you can. 542 00:20:59,932 --> 00:21:01,966 He bought me a drink at the bachelorette party, 543 00:21:01,991 --> 00:21:04,225 and now I'm moving to Las Vegas to be with him. 544 00:21:05,607 --> 00:21:07,431 I mean, you get it. You did the same thing. 545 00:21:07,456 --> 00:21:08,722 Pulling a Rebecca Bunch. 546 00:21:13,509 --> 00:21:15,033 How great is that pizza bianco? 547 00:21:15,058 --> 00:21:16,357 It was delicious. 548 00:21:16,426 --> 00:21:18,384 In fact, I would like for you to refer to me 549 00:21:18,409 --> 00:21:19,884 as "Josh Bianco" from now on. Thank you. 550 00:21:19,909 --> 00:21:21,787 You took off all the cheese and soaked up the oil 551 00:21:21,812 --> 00:21:23,089 with a paper towel and ate that. 552 00:21:23,246 --> 00:21:24,954 - It was a cheat day. - Okay. 553 00:21:25,338 --> 00:21:28,087 Oh. This is concerning. 554 00:21:28,805 --> 00:21:31,606 Sir, I would like you to stand down. 555 00:21:32,213 --> 00:21:34,000 Hey, Josh. Uh, what? 556 00:21:34,025 --> 00:21:35,533 It has been brought to my attention 557 00:21:35,558 --> 00:21:37,533 that Rebecca is torn between me, you and Nathaniel. 558 00:21:37,558 --> 00:21:38,924 He has agreed to stand down, 559 00:21:38,949 --> 00:21:40,650 and, sir, that is what I ask of you. 560 00:21:40,675 --> 00:21:41,814 Oh, this is tremendous. 561 00:21:41,839 --> 00:21:43,126 What are you talking about? 562 00:21:43,150 --> 00:21:46,551 Shall you or shan't you stand down? 563 00:21:46,663 --> 00:21:48,663 Serrano! 564 00:21:48,688 --> 00:21:51,267 Gonna need you to stand down, buddy. 565 00:21:52,290 --> 00:21:54,002 Oh, Josh is here. 566 00:21:54,027 --> 00:21:56,461 You know, I let my cable and my Netflix lapse. 567 00:21:56,530 --> 00:21:58,029 Turns out I didn't need it. 568 00:21:58,098 --> 00:22:00,009 Don't enjoy it. I mean, it is enjoyable. 569 00:22:00,033 --> 00:22:02,267 Dude, what are you doing here? 570 00:22:02,335 --> 00:22:03,635 You said you were standing down. 571 00:22:03,660 --> 00:22:05,345 Well, so did you. You said you were standing down. 572 00:22:05,370 --> 00:22:07,256 Well, I realized I couldn't live without Rebecca. 573 00:22:07,384 --> 00:22:08,517 I realized that, too, 574 00:22:08,542 --> 00:22:10,608 and then I realized that he needed to stand down. 575 00:22:10,677 --> 00:22:12,121 Wait, wait, wait. Someone say "Stand down" again. 576 00:22:12,145 --> 00:22:13,278 - Stand down! - No! 577 00:22:13,303 --> 00:22:15,014 Guys, I don't know what you're talking about. 578 00:22:15,039 --> 00:22:16,768 Rebecca and I are over. 579 00:22:16,793 --> 00:22:18,226 She has no interest in me. 580 00:22:18,294 --> 00:22:21,653 He doesn't know about the whiteboard. 581 00:22:21,721 --> 00:22:23,521 Oh, we got to show him the whiteboard. 582 00:22:23,590 --> 00:22:24,734 Please show us the whiteboard. 583 00:22:24,758 --> 00:22:26,358 Does anyone know where the whiteboard is? 584 00:22:29,787 --> 00:22:31,037 Follow me. 585 00:22:34,536 --> 00:22:37,048 Whoa. This is nuts. 586 00:22:37,681 --> 00:22:38,980 This is awful. 587 00:22:39,251 --> 00:22:41,583 - She's making lists? - They're columns, 588 00:22:41,608 --> 00:22:42,885 and I'm gonna trademark columns. 589 00:22:42,909 --> 00:22:44,576 You're gonna trademark the word "columns" 590 00:22:44,601 --> 00:22:46,501 or just the concept of columns? 591 00:22:46,526 --> 00:22:48,092 Oh. I don't know. I'm not sure. 592 00:22:48,248 --> 00:22:49,244 Okay. 593 00:22:49,269 --> 00:22:50,638 Well, you can erase my column. 594 00:22:50,828 --> 00:22:52,295 This is dumb. I'm out. 595 00:22:55,340 --> 00:22:57,340 He's standing down, then? 596 00:22:59,926 --> 00:23:01,092 Hey, Audra. 597 00:23:01,117 --> 00:23:02,771 You're pulling a Rebecca Bunch. Wow. 598 00:23:02,796 --> 00:23:05,063 May I talk to you for just a moment? 599 00:23:05,131 --> 00:23:06,409 Can you wait just a minute, Daddy? 600 00:23:06,433 --> 00:23:07,532 Daddy? 601 00:23:07,645 --> 00:23:10,879 Don't be late, or you'll get a spankin'. 602 00:23:10,904 --> 00:23:12,270 O... Kay. 603 00:23:12,339 --> 00:23:13,471 - Okay. - Thank you. 604 00:23:14,908 --> 00:23:17,175 - Don't leave without me. - Hey. Hi. 605 00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:18,899 You're using me as justification 606 00:23:18,924 --> 00:23:22,390 for abandoning your three very, very tiny children? 607 00:23:22,415 --> 00:23:24,415 I'm just doing exactly what you did. 608 00:23:24,528 --> 00:23:25,694 - What? - Yes. You know what? 609 00:23:25,719 --> 00:23:27,285 I've actually secretly admired you 610 00:23:27,310 --> 00:23:28,797 for it for a long time. 611 00:23:28,822 --> 00:23:30,961 You escaped our restrictive upbringing 612 00:23:30,986 --> 00:23:33,702 and started a cute business, you have great friends, 613 00:23:33,727 --> 00:23:38,096 and have dated 9.6's despite being solidly in the fives. 614 00:23:38,845 --> 00:23:40,842 And you're happy with your choices, right? 615 00:23:41,648 --> 00:23:43,103 Uh... 616 00:23:44,871 --> 00:23:46,626 Yes? 617 00:23:46,651 --> 00:23:50,418 Well, then, thank you and your friends or whatever, 618 00:23:50,443 --> 00:23:53,111 but I'm fine, and I actually have to go. 619 00:23:53,136 --> 00:23:55,036 Jesse's playing in a secret, backroom, 620 00:23:55,061 --> 00:23:56,765 high-stakes poker game. 621 00:23:56,790 --> 00:23:58,360 It's in something called the Diamond Suite. 622 00:23:58,429 --> 00:24:02,097 And I have to be there with him because I'm his good luck charm. 623 00:24:02,494 --> 00:24:04,366 He says he's gonna buy me a tiger. 624 00:24:04,391 --> 00:24:06,412 Okay, Audra. Audra! 625 00:24:06,437 --> 00:24:08,036 Audra, this is crazy. 626 00:24:08,259 --> 00:24:11,580 You can't call me crazy, 'cause when you call me crazy, 627 00:24:11,605 --> 00:24:14,440 you're just calling me in love. Blam! 628 00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:18,013 Ah... Don't-don't touch her. 629 00:24:20,573 --> 00:24:22,573 God, I just want to get in there. 630 00:24:22,686 --> 00:24:24,619 Mama needs some fancy suits. 631 00:24:24,688 --> 00:24:26,621 Oh, hey, cool text from Hector. 632 00:24:26,646 --> 00:24:28,126 "Which one is the smoke detector, 633 00:24:28,151 --> 00:24:29,991 "and which one is the carbon monoxide detector? 634 00:24:30,016 --> 00:24:31,463 "Guess it doesn't matter. 635 00:24:31,488 --> 00:24:33,079 I set off both." 636 00:24:36,329 --> 00:24:37,899 Wait. I went to high school 637 00:24:37,924 --> 00:24:39,424 with that girl. 638 00:24:39,449 --> 00:24:41,903 Is that Denise Martinez? 639 00:24:41,972 --> 00:24:43,705 That bitch I cannot stand. 640 00:24:43,730 --> 00:24:45,163 Hey! 641 00:24:45,188 --> 00:24:47,322 - Hey! - Hey... girl! 642 00:24:47,347 --> 00:24:48,946 - Hey! - Hey! 643 00:24:50,837 --> 00:24:52,003 - Hey! - Hey! 644 00:24:52,072 --> 00:24:53,805 Having yourself a little Vegas vaycay? 645 00:24:53,873 --> 00:24:54,939 Yeah. Kind of. 646 00:24:55,008 --> 00:24:56,248 Um, it's my bachelorette party. 647 00:24:56,276 --> 00:24:57,442 I'm getting married. 648 00:24:57,510 --> 00:24:58,710 Ah! Can you believe it? 649 00:25:00,213 --> 00:25:01,346 I can't. 650 00:25:01,414 --> 00:25:03,014 Yeah, he was really dragging his heels, 651 00:25:03,083 --> 00:25:05,817 so I gave him a deadline, and he was afraid of losing me, 652 00:25:05,885 --> 00:25:08,453 so he forked over the diamond. Yay! 653 00:25:10,251 --> 00:25:11,499 Mm. 654 00:25:11,586 --> 00:25:13,953 Okay. Got to go. Bye. 655 00:25:16,298 --> 00:25:18,606 Hey, guys. We got to help Audra. She's in trouble, 656 00:25:19,033 --> 00:25:20,775 and it's kind of because of me, so, uh, 657 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:22,392 just let's go. Come on. 658 00:25:23,203 --> 00:25:25,770 She said it's some kind of backroom poker game. 659 00:25:25,839 --> 00:25:28,106 Should we wait outside, or should we knock? 660 00:25:28,174 --> 00:25:30,441 Oh. Oh, guys, guys, guys, guys, 661 00:25:30,510 --> 00:25:32,910 "backroom" is code for illegal. 662 00:25:33,023 --> 00:25:35,223 The stakes in these games are massive. 663 00:25:35,248 --> 00:25:37,630 I know this because I-I saw a movie once. 664 00:25:37,655 --> 00:25:40,095 Listen, we got to get in there, we got to double down on-on... 665 00:25:40,120 --> 00:25:41,719 on saving Audrey. 666 00:25:41,832 --> 00:25:43,098 - Audra. - Yep. Her. 667 00:25:43,123 --> 00:25:45,001 Just... You know what? Just point her out 668 00:25:45,026 --> 00:25:46,970 when we get in there. 669 00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:50,238 Who the hell are you? 670 00:25:50,263 --> 00:25:51,423 Hello, sir. We are here to see 671 00:25:51,464 --> 00:25:53,030 - a friend in the room. - Shh. Get in here. 672 00:25:53,099 --> 00:25:54,766 What? What? What? What the... ? 673 00:25:54,834 --> 00:25:56,200 - Hey! - Excuse me, sir. 674 00:25:56,269 --> 00:25:58,500 Do not handle me and my friends in a rough manner! 675 00:25:58,525 --> 00:26:00,405 We're here to see Audra Levine right there. 676 00:26:00,473 --> 00:26:01,672 Never seen her in my life. 677 00:26:01,785 --> 00:26:03,318 Okay, Audra, we can discuss this later, 678 00:26:03,343 --> 00:26:05,042 - but I got to get you out of here. - Nope. 679 00:26:05,078 --> 00:26:06,322 Hey, hey, hey, you know what? 680 00:26:06,346 --> 00:26:07,945 I have an idea. Why don't all of you go, 681 00:26:08,014 --> 00:26:09,347 and take Audra's 682 00:26:09,416 --> 00:26:10,426 skeezeball boyfriend with you, and then 683 00:26:10,450 --> 00:26:11,549 I'll sit at the table 684 00:26:11,574 --> 00:26:13,073 while you all talk it out? 685 00:26:13,098 --> 00:26:14,998 What's the buy-in? What game are we playing? 686 00:26:15,023 --> 00:26:16,564 The game is, you're coming with me. 687 00:26:16,589 --> 00:26:18,022 - Oh, come on. - Hey. Let's go. 688 00:26:18,091 --> 00:26:20,236 - All right. Let's go. - Right through there. You, too. Come on. 689 00:26:20,260 --> 00:26:21,426 - No! - Yes. You, too. 690 00:26:21,494 --> 00:26:23,060 I don't care. 691 00:26:23,129 --> 00:26:24,362 Get inside. Shut up. 692 00:26:24,475 --> 00:26:26,174 Sit down and be quiet. 693 00:26:26,199 --> 00:26:27,732 Okay. We can't have you 694 00:26:27,757 --> 00:26:30,057 blabbing about this game to anyone until it's over. 695 00:26:30,214 --> 00:26:32,147 If I hear a peep out of this room, 696 00:26:32,172 --> 00:26:34,697 that window's a nice way to get to the sidewalk. 697 00:26:36,933 --> 00:26:38,633 The sidewalk? Wait. 698 00:26:39,065 --> 00:26:41,298 Guys, we're a bunch of stories up. 699 00:26:42,845 --> 00:26:45,527 I think he means throw us out the... 700 00:26:45,853 --> 00:26:47,095 Oh, that's what he means. 701 00:26:47,120 --> 00:26:49,053 You guys already... 702 00:26:50,751 --> 00:26:51,917 That's so scary. 703 00:26:57,533 --> 00:27:00,735 I hope Jesse's okay. 704 00:27:01,510 --> 00:27:04,778 He's hypoglycemic, and the only thing that helps is sex. 705 00:27:05,814 --> 00:27:09,829 Audra, you know who this guy really is, right? 706 00:27:09,854 --> 00:27:13,456 Yeah, honey, I mean, I know he's got that sleazy, oily, 707 00:27:13,481 --> 00:27:15,800 shaved-all-over, bad-boy charm, Ugh. 708 00:27:15,825 --> 00:27:16,587 But he's a loser. 709 00:27:16,612 --> 00:27:19,380 Jesse is not oily. He's just naturally moist. 710 00:27:19,543 --> 00:27:21,009 And you're jealous. 711 00:27:21,034 --> 00:27:23,468 - All of you, you're all just jealous. - Hey, lady. 712 00:27:23,493 --> 00:27:26,048 We all uprooted our lives to come out here and save you 713 00:27:26,072 --> 00:27:27,872 and talk you out of child abandonment. 714 00:27:27,897 --> 00:27:29,497 Be a little more respectful. 715 00:27:29,522 --> 00:27:31,118 Yeah, we're basically heroes. 716 00:27:31,143 --> 00:27:32,877 - Dare to defy. - Mm-hmm. 717 00:27:32,945 --> 00:27:36,947 Oh, please. You three are not here for me. 718 00:27:37,016 --> 00:27:38,994 You're here because you're miserable 719 00:27:39,019 --> 00:27:41,189 and you're trying to avoid your own miserable lives. 720 00:27:41,271 --> 00:27:42,497 - Who told you that? - What do you know? 721 00:27:42,522 --> 00:27:43,454 Have you talked to Beth? 722 00:27:43,567 --> 00:27:44,966 You all just seem miserable. 723 00:27:44,991 --> 00:27:46,568 At least Rebecca here kind of understands me. 724 00:27:46,592 --> 00:27:47,836 She knows, if you want to be happy, 725 00:27:47,860 --> 00:27:50,316 you gotta make these decisive choices. 726 00:27:50,341 --> 00:27:51,573 Right, Rebecca? 727 00:27:53,032 --> 00:27:55,432 Yeah. I mean, that-that's what I do. Always. 728 00:27:55,501 --> 00:27:56,867 Shh. 729 00:27:56,892 --> 00:27:58,959 Hey. 730 00:27:58,984 --> 00:28:01,785 This loser went all in on a marker and can't cover his bet. 731 00:28:01,810 --> 00:28:04,277 Oh, no, Jesse, what did you do? 732 00:28:04,302 --> 00:28:05,634 I had two high pairs. 733 00:28:05,777 --> 00:28:07,156 That's usually pretty good. 734 00:28:07,181 --> 00:28:08,322 Honey, help me. 735 00:28:08,347 --> 00:28:09,613 Bail me out here. 736 00:28:09,682 --> 00:28:11,603 I... love you? 737 00:28:13,150 --> 00:28:14,262 I can't. 738 00:28:14,790 --> 00:28:16,274 David put a lock 739 00:28:16,299 --> 00:28:18,766 on all my accounts, Daddy. 740 00:28:18,791 --> 00:28:21,425 Well, then tell that Jew banker to just wire the money. 741 00:28:22,908 --> 00:28:26,043 - No way, man. - Uh-uh. - You can't even think that. No. 742 00:28:26,068 --> 00:28:27,868 We're gonna need that money back in the game, 743 00:28:27,893 --> 00:28:30,144 or this racist loser is gonna hit the pavement 744 00:28:30,169 --> 00:28:31,435 through the window. 745 00:28:31,460 --> 00:28:32,770 Don't get confused, Jesse. 746 00:28:32,795 --> 00:28:34,306 We're a bunch of stories up, so he's threatening 747 00:28:34,331 --> 00:28:35,942 - to throw you out the window. I've checked. - Yeah. 748 00:28:36,008 --> 00:28:37,453 Rebecca, what about that statement 749 00:28:37,478 --> 00:28:38,753 - was confusing to you? - No, no, no. 750 00:28:38,778 --> 00:28:40,455 - No, definitely out the window. - I don't know. 751 00:28:40,479 --> 00:28:41,790 Sometimes, things are one story... 752 00:28:43,172 --> 00:28:44,906 Okay! Okay! No, no, everyone just shut up! 753 00:28:45,017 --> 00:28:46,350 I got this. 754 00:28:46,619 --> 00:28:47,895 I got the money. 755 00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:49,253 I'm getting in the game. 756 00:28:49,278 --> 00:28:52,112 I'm making up Jesse's money and then some. 757 00:28:52,341 --> 00:28:53,808 Let me see the money. 758 00:28:56,095 --> 00:28:59,220 Deal me in, douchebags. 759 00:29:04,637 --> 00:29:07,004 ♪ ♪ 760 00:29:14,380 --> 00:29:16,847 ♪ Slow motion, slow motion ♪ 761 00:29:17,236 --> 00:29:19,427 ♪ We're watching Paula crush it in slow motion ♪ 762 00:29:19,452 --> 00:29:20,651 ♪ What's happening? ♪ 763 00:29:20,676 --> 00:29:22,008 ♪ I don't know poker ♪ 764 00:29:22,254 --> 00:29:25,222 ♪ ♪ 765 00:29:26,658 --> 00:29:29,093 ♪ Hell yeah ♪ 766 00:29:29,161 --> 00:29:31,729 ♪ Gambling is awesome ♪ 767 00:29:31,841 --> 00:29:33,941 ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 768 00:29:34,009 --> 00:29:36,031 ♪ Hell yeah, in your face ♪ 769 00:29:36,056 --> 00:29:38,202 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah. ♪ 770 00:29:40,683 --> 00:29:43,050 Oh, my God! 771 00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:49,947 ♪ ♪ 772 00:29:57,156 --> 00:30:00,224 ♪ We're back in more slow motion, slow motion ♪ 773 00:30:00,292 --> 00:30:02,626 ♪ All eyes on us in slow motion ♪ 774 00:30:02,695 --> 00:30:05,095 ♪ Are they envious or is it just weird ♪ 775 00:30:05,208 --> 00:30:07,241 ♪ That we're five people walking in a row ♪ 776 00:30:07,266 --> 00:30:10,501 ♪ Wearing very similar suits? ♪ 777 00:30:10,613 --> 00:30:12,986 ♪ Maybe they think we're in a sexy cult ♪ 778 00:30:13,011 --> 00:30:16,312 ♪ Or flight attendants for five different airlines. ♪ 779 00:30:20,604 --> 00:30:22,982 - Hey, can I ask you something? - Of course. 780 00:30:23,006 --> 00:30:24,072 - You and Darryl... - Mm. 781 00:30:24,141 --> 00:30:26,341 Are you really happy just being friends, 782 00:30:26,366 --> 00:30:27,658 or do you hold out hope 783 00:30:27,683 --> 00:30:29,580 maybe one day you'll get back together? 784 00:30:29,620 --> 00:30:32,724 Oh, no. No. We're-we're really happy just being friends. 785 00:30:32,749 --> 00:30:35,083 Okay, good. Um, all right. 786 00:30:35,108 --> 00:30:36,874 Yeah, maybe that's what I have with Rebecca. 787 00:30:36,899 --> 00:30:38,131 Oh, didn't let me finish. 788 00:30:38,156 --> 00:30:40,256 Uh, Darryl and I are happy just being friends 789 00:30:40,281 --> 00:30:42,481 because we really ultimately didn't work as a couple 790 00:30:42,538 --> 00:30:44,404 and we really are happy with other people. 791 00:30:44,429 --> 00:30:45,551 But you and Rebecca seem different. 792 00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:47,827 Different, how? 793 00:30:47,852 --> 00:30:50,205 Oh, don't make me say it. 794 00:30:51,437 --> 00:30:53,638 Ugh, dude. 795 00:30:53,877 --> 00:30:56,236 I have known you for most of your life, 796 00:30:57,941 --> 00:31:00,341 and I've never seen you as happy as you are 797 00:31:00,366 --> 00:31:01,697 when you're with Rebecca, 798 00:31:01,722 --> 00:31:04,256 even though I am truly, deeply 799 00:31:04,281 --> 00:31:05,480 perplexed as to how, 800 00:31:05,505 --> 00:31:07,004 not only you, but two other guys 801 00:31:07,029 --> 00:31:08,428 could be so into her. 802 00:31:08,453 --> 00:31:10,687 Truly, one of the great puzzlements of the ages. 803 00:31:10,712 --> 00:31:13,046 But... 804 00:31:13,290 --> 00:31:14,823 Yeah. You, uh... 805 00:31:14,848 --> 00:31:17,282 you guys seem like you have something special, so... 806 00:31:17,307 --> 00:31:19,830 I don't know. I think you got to give that a shot. 807 00:31:20,392 --> 00:31:21,992 How do I do that? 808 00:31:25,022 --> 00:31:26,489 Well... 809 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,333 Wow, Jesse was a real loser, I guess. 810 00:31:33,675 --> 00:31:36,092 Yeah. He-he is. 811 00:31:36,117 --> 00:31:37,816 I guess I kind of lost my mind. 812 00:31:38,354 --> 00:31:39,686 You know what? I'm actually embarrassed 813 00:31:39,711 --> 00:31:41,411 that you saw me like this. 814 00:31:42,178 --> 00:31:44,747 Especially you, who somehow, 815 00:31:44,772 --> 00:31:48,600 despite all the odds, have your life together now. 816 00:31:48,625 --> 00:31:49,967 So, good job. 817 00:31:49,992 --> 00:31:51,691 Huh. 818 00:31:52,107 --> 00:31:55,207 Audra, I'm flattered 819 00:31:55,232 --> 00:31:58,032 that you've been inspired by my life choices, 820 00:31:58,057 --> 00:32:00,157 and I know how you must see me, 821 00:32:00,182 --> 00:32:01,381 you know, as a hardworking 822 00:32:01,959 --> 00:32:04,249 and very decisive pretzel entrepreneur 823 00:32:04,274 --> 00:32:06,341 who has taken many a lover out in West Covina. 824 00:32:06,453 --> 00:32:08,453 Yes, exactly. Yeah. 825 00:32:08,759 --> 00:32:10,381 It's not that easy. 826 00:32:10,843 --> 00:32:12,521 I struggle with making decisions every day, 827 00:32:12,546 --> 00:32:14,913 and I probably will for the rest of my life. 828 00:32:15,436 --> 00:32:18,930 I mean, I came to Vegas just to avoid making a decision. 829 00:32:19,428 --> 00:32:21,055 You did? 830 00:32:21,990 --> 00:32:23,235 Let me ask you something. 831 00:32:23,260 --> 00:32:24,759 Did you run away 832 00:32:24,784 --> 00:32:27,952 because you really don't love your husband and kids 833 00:32:27,977 --> 00:32:29,777 or because it just got hard? 834 00:32:32,259 --> 00:32:33,982 'Cause it got hard. 835 00:32:34,319 --> 00:32:36,753 I love my family, 836 00:32:36,778 --> 00:32:39,384 but triplets are rough, okay? 837 00:32:39,409 --> 00:32:40,708 And we're all alone. 838 00:32:40,733 --> 00:32:42,709 It's just me and David and our three Au pairs. 839 00:32:43,750 --> 00:32:45,326 It's so much. 840 00:32:45,576 --> 00:32:48,010 There's always something touching my breasts. 841 00:32:49,886 --> 00:32:52,436 - That sounds hard. - Yeah. 842 00:32:52,461 --> 00:32:55,456 But something I learned from moving across the country 843 00:32:55,481 --> 00:32:57,748 was not to just make rash decisions, 844 00:32:57,773 --> 00:33:00,273 but to face up to my life. 845 00:33:00,298 --> 00:33:02,999 And it's hard to do, but if you do it, it's worth it. 846 00:33:04,227 --> 00:33:07,595 Well, you're a lot cooler than I thought you were. 847 00:33:07,620 --> 00:33:09,353 Oh. Well, ditto. 848 00:33:09,378 --> 00:33:10,850 May I say 849 00:33:10,875 --> 00:33:13,442 it feels very good to have you say something nice about me. 850 00:33:13,777 --> 00:33:15,843 Yeah. You know, actually, 851 00:33:15,868 --> 00:33:17,601 I could say a lot of nice things about you. 852 00:33:19,001 --> 00:33:20,764 Yeah. 853 00:33:23,998 --> 00:33:26,587 ♪ All of our lives, you were toxic, obnoxious ♪ 854 00:33:26,612 --> 00:33:29,046 ♪ Now, though, you've brought me from nauseous to naches ♪ 855 00:33:29,071 --> 00:33:30,303 ♪ I'm proud of you, Bunch ♪ 856 00:33:30,328 --> 00:33:31,761 ♪ You're a grown-up, you got this ♪ 857 00:33:31,786 --> 00:33:33,352 ♪ Kol hakavod, you're a goddess ♪ 858 00:33:33,377 --> 00:33:35,478 ♪ Me? But you're so responsible ♪ 859 00:33:35,503 --> 00:33:38,104 ♪ Career's on sizzle, husband, ditto ♪ 860 00:33:38,310 --> 00:33:39,776 ♪ Three great kiddos ♪ 861 00:33:39,801 --> 00:33:41,534 ♪ You've got competence, class ♪ 862 00:33:41,559 --> 00:33:43,860 ♪ Plus a skinny-ass waist and a toned-ass ass ♪ 863 00:33:43,885 --> 00:33:46,386 ♪ Well, you've got a free spirit which I see and commend ♪ 864 00:33:46,499 --> 00:33:48,866 ♪ So like 2 Chainz without the N-Z at the end ♪ 865 00:33:48,891 --> 00:33:51,258 ♪ I wish you double chai for following the tug ♪ 866 00:33:51,370 --> 00:33:54,004 ♪ Of the heart behind your 36 triple-D jugs ♪ 867 00:33:54,073 --> 00:33:55,939 ♪ Wow, what a boost for my confidence ♪ 868 00:33:56,008 --> 00:33:57,574 ♪ Yeah, I mean, I gotta give it up ♪ 869 00:33:57,599 --> 00:33:59,110 ♪ I'm pretty good at giving compliments ♪ 870 00:33:59,135 --> 00:34:01,135 ♪ Nice bubble, bubbeleh, I really hate to pop it ♪ 871 00:34:01,160 --> 00:34:03,794 ♪ But nobody's got a plaudit any hotter than I drop it ♪ 872 00:34:03,949 --> 00:34:05,916 ♪ This is a JAP praise fight ♪ 873 00:34:05,985 --> 00:34:07,351 ♪ Half affirmation ♪ 874 00:34:07,376 --> 00:34:08,309 ♪ Half cage fight ♪ 875 00:34:08,420 --> 00:34:09,580 ♪ Killing you with kindness ♪ 876 00:34:09,622 --> 00:34:11,121 ♪ Yeah, you're dang right ♪ 877 00:34:11,190 --> 00:34:13,135 ♪ It's a head-to-head yasher koach mazel tov off ♪ 878 00:34:13,159 --> 00:34:14,725 ♪ You know what? Let's squash it ♪ 879 00:34:14,794 --> 00:34:16,138 - ♪ You're awesome ♪ - ♪ Seconded, same ♪ 880 00:34:16,162 --> 00:34:18,962 ♪ Rebecca-wise, my game recognize game ♪ 881 00:34:19,031 --> 00:34:20,731 ♪ Thanks, I appreciate that ♪ 882 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:22,043 ♪ Yeah, I mean, there's a reason ♪ 883 00:34:22,067 --> 00:34:23,600 ♪ I'm called "Esteem Queen Levine" ♪ 884 00:34:23,669 --> 00:34:26,403 ♪ Can it with the accolades slash shade catapulting ♪ 885 00:34:26,472 --> 00:34:28,772 ♪ You are the one who is great at adulting ♪ 886 00:34:28,841 --> 00:34:30,207 ♪ All your hard work ♪ 887 00:34:30,276 --> 00:34:32,209 ♪ Ultimately resulting in triumph ♪ 888 00:34:32,278 --> 00:34:33,911 ♪ Damn, that's some sneaky insulting ♪ 889 00:34:33,979 --> 00:34:35,879 ♪ Skip the emotional judo ♪ 890 00:34:35,948 --> 00:34:38,382 ♪ I am the B. Knowles-Carter of kudos ♪ 891 00:34:38,450 --> 00:34:40,150 ♪ I'm the LeBron James of acclaim ♪ 892 00:34:40,175 --> 00:34:43,076 ♪ Then you might as well call me the Michelle of the kvell ♪ 893 00:34:43,189 --> 00:34:44,922 ♪ Go to hell ♪ ♪ This is ♪ 894 00:34:44,990 --> 00:34:45,990 ♪ A JAP cheer-scrimmage ♪ 895 00:34:46,058 --> 00:34:47,291 ♪ Like a rap battle ♪ 896 00:34:47,359 --> 00:34:48,425 ♪ But the mirror image ♪ 897 00:34:48,494 --> 00:34:49,827 ♪ Both of us'll feel great ♪ 898 00:34:49,895 --> 00:34:50,928 ♪ When we're finished ♪ 899 00:34:50,996 --> 00:34:52,162 ♪ Giving a dope-slap of dap ♪ 900 00:34:52,231 --> 00:34:53,430 ♪ To this JAP ♪ 901 00:34:53,499 --> 00:34:55,799 Which does stand for Jewish-American Princess, 902 00:34:55,868 --> 00:34:58,235 a term that, on one hand, does reinforce 903 00:34:58,304 --> 00:35:01,471 negative, negative stereotypes about both Jews and women, 904 00:35:01,584 --> 00:35:02,783 but, on the other hand, 905 00:35:02,808 --> 00:35:05,175 is a term that we want to reclaim and own. 906 00:35:05,321 --> 00:35:07,354 Also, should acknowledge 907 00:35:07,379 --> 00:35:10,314 that me saying "dap to this JAP" is appropriative 908 00:35:10,382 --> 00:35:12,471 and a little problematic, if we're being honest. 909 00:35:12,890 --> 00:35:14,057 Yep. 910 00:35:14,987 --> 00:35:17,321 ♪ This is touchy stuff and it's pretty complicated ♪ 911 00:35:17,389 --> 00:35:18,500 ♪ But I noticed the dynamic ♪ 912 00:35:18,524 --> 00:35:19,801 ♪ And I thought that I should name it ♪ 913 00:35:19,825 --> 00:35:21,124 ♪ Just like I hated you ♪ 914 00:35:21,193 --> 00:35:22,426 ♪ But now I kinda like you ♪ 915 00:35:22,494 --> 00:35:23,638 ♪ This song's another thing ♪ 916 00:35:23,662 --> 00:35:24,795 ♪ I can see two sides to ♪ 917 00:35:24,864 --> 00:35:25,963 ♪ Terrific self-awareness ♪ 918 00:35:26,031 --> 00:35:27,397 ♪ Knock if off, Audra ♪ 919 00:35:27,466 --> 00:35:28,599 ♪ You never stop, do you? ♪ 920 00:35:28,667 --> 00:35:29,833 ♪ Can't and don't wanna ♪ 921 00:35:29,902 --> 00:35:30,979 ♪ You're a wonderful lady ♪ 922 00:35:31,003 --> 00:35:32,123 ♪ But an insufferable baby ♪ 923 00:35:32,171 --> 00:35:33,337 ♪ Should we make out? ♪ 924 00:35:33,405 --> 00:35:35,205 ♪ What? No. Maybe. ♪ 925 00:35:36,508 --> 00:35:37,981 You know what? Let's just shake hands. 926 00:35:38,711 --> 00:35:41,178 - Right. Of course. - Yeah. 927 00:35:44,473 --> 00:35:46,393 Oh, my God, Rebecca, your hands are so dry, 928 00:35:46,418 --> 00:35:48,085 it's like petting a lizard. 929 00:35:48,110 --> 00:35:49,637 Would it kill you to moisturize? 930 00:35:51,657 --> 00:35:53,056 Good-bye, Audra. 931 00:35:54,592 --> 00:35:56,358 Bye. 932 00:35:59,676 --> 00:36:02,209 Hi. Can I charge those drinks to her room? Thank you. 933 00:36:02,762 --> 00:36:03,911 I think I have a solution. 934 00:36:03,936 --> 00:36:05,836 Something that involves none of you 935 00:36:05,861 --> 00:36:07,992 standing down. 936 00:36:08,017 --> 00:36:11,252 Sorry, that phrase is just so dumb. 937 00:36:11,277 --> 00:36:13,443 Uh, anyway, I got this idea. 938 00:36:13,468 --> 00:36:15,034 I was planted in front of my TV, 939 00:36:15,059 --> 00:36:17,326 which is what I sometimes do when I'm doing my crunches. 940 00:36:17,351 --> 00:36:19,718 As you guys know, I do a lot of crunches. 941 00:36:19,743 --> 00:36:21,375 I also do a lot of crunches. 942 00:36:22,431 --> 00:36:24,676 All right. I'll just tell you what it is. 943 00:36:28,653 --> 00:36:31,184 ♪ 944 00:36:35,948 --> 00:36:37,815 Hey, hey. Hey. 945 00:36:37,883 --> 00:36:39,372 You are looking sharp. 946 00:36:39,403 --> 00:36:40,569 That is a nice suit. 947 00:36:40,622 --> 00:36:41,870 Thank you. Fett? 948 00:36:41,982 --> 00:36:43,682 Yeah. Feels great. 949 00:36:43,707 --> 00:36:44,973 I love it. 950 00:36:45,042 --> 00:36:47,075 Got it with the proceeds of a backroom poker game. 951 00:36:47,144 --> 00:36:49,244 - Illegal? - Allegedly. 952 00:36:49,313 --> 00:36:51,513 But, Julia, I have to tell you 953 00:36:51,538 --> 00:36:55,006 that this is the last one of these suits that I will buy. 954 00:36:55,031 --> 00:36:58,666 Because, good Lord, even if I could afford it... why? 955 00:36:58,822 --> 00:37:02,669 It's just jackets and pants and skirts, and so... 956 00:37:03,856 --> 00:37:07,462 I'm sorry if I don't fit in, but... I just can't do it. 957 00:37:07,575 --> 00:37:10,042 Paula, we do not care how you dress. 958 00:37:10,111 --> 00:37:11,377 That's not why we hired you. 959 00:37:11,402 --> 00:37:12,754 You are a brilliant legal mind. 960 00:37:12,779 --> 00:37:14,079 You just keep on doing that, 961 00:37:14,104 --> 00:37:15,904 and you're gonna fit in here just fine. 962 00:37:18,486 --> 00:37:19,985 Wow. Okay. 963 00:37:20,010 --> 00:37:21,209 Thank you. 964 00:37:21,278 --> 00:37:23,679 I just, you know, I just wanted to fit in so badly, 965 00:37:23,704 --> 00:37:25,270 and so I thought I needed the suits, 966 00:37:25,295 --> 00:37:27,295 and I'm glad I don't. 967 00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:28,122 No. 968 00:37:28,130 --> 00:37:29,430 Oh, by the way, hot tip... 969 00:37:29,498 --> 00:37:32,399 They have some great stuff at Dress Barn. 970 00:37:33,098 --> 00:37:34,902 It's a dress barn? 971 00:37:34,970 --> 00:37:37,871 Yeah. You know what? It's not for you. I see that. 972 00:37:38,027 --> 00:37:41,118 - Probably not. - Probably not. 973 00:37:41,458 --> 00:37:43,110 Hey, do you know where 974 00:37:43,179 --> 00:37:44,211 my gray hoodie is? 975 00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:45,779 It was in that pile of... 976 00:37:45,892 --> 00:37:47,892 one gray hoodie on the floor. 977 00:37:48,286 --> 00:37:50,461 Um, no, I don't. 978 00:37:50,856 --> 00:37:53,130 You are gonna have to find that hoodie yourself. 979 00:37:54,044 --> 00:37:55,325 Hector, 980 00:37:55,350 --> 00:37:57,150 I am not your mommy. 981 00:37:57,175 --> 00:37:58,997 And you are not my daddy. 982 00:37:59,185 --> 00:38:00,551 I learned that in Vegas. 983 00:38:01,090 --> 00:38:03,337 We are partners in this marriage, 984 00:38:03,362 --> 00:38:04,862 and I need you to show up. 985 00:38:05,300 --> 00:38:07,233 Okay? We have to work together, 986 00:38:07,258 --> 00:38:10,726 or someday I might run off to Vegas to be with a guy 987 00:38:10,751 --> 00:38:13,036 who's made multiple submission tapes to The Real World. 988 00:38:13,061 --> 00:38:14,960 Okay. I get it. 989 00:38:15,866 --> 00:38:18,500 Uh, I guess I did that because you picked up the slack 990 00:38:18,628 --> 00:38:19,730 and I liked it. 991 00:38:19,755 --> 00:38:21,755 But I won't do it again. 992 00:38:21,851 --> 00:38:23,217 Thank you. 993 00:38:23,269 --> 00:38:24,379 Great. 994 00:38:24,992 --> 00:38:26,892 So... gray hoodie. 995 00:38:27,578 --> 00:38:29,231 Sunset on it. No? 996 00:38:29,256 --> 00:38:31,489 - Mm. Mm-mm. Yep, no. - No? 997 00:38:31,514 --> 00:38:33,309 Oh, I'll find it. Don't worry. 998 00:38:33,832 --> 00:38:35,861 It's just... left my keys in there. 999 00:38:35,886 --> 00:38:37,219 Mm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. 1000 00:38:38,094 --> 00:38:40,127 So, when I saw that Denise Martinez 1001 00:38:40,152 --> 00:38:41,752 pressured someone into a proposal, 1002 00:38:42,051 --> 00:38:44,028 I realized ultimatums are super basic, 1003 00:38:44,053 --> 00:38:46,239 so I don't want to do them anymore. 1004 00:38:46,423 --> 00:38:48,418 That's good... I guess. 1005 00:38:48,443 --> 00:38:49,476 I love you. 1006 00:38:49,637 --> 00:38:50,737 I hope you can forgive me. 1007 00:38:50,762 --> 00:38:52,095 I forgive you. 1008 00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:53,486 And, V, you know, 1009 00:38:53,511 --> 00:38:55,311 I wasn't saying no to marriage forever. 1010 00:38:55,573 --> 00:38:57,973 If, one day, you decide you want to get down 1011 00:38:57,998 --> 00:39:00,766 on one knee and give me a nice square cut, 1012 00:39:00,791 --> 00:39:03,625 ethically sourced diamond, I might say yes. 1013 00:39:03,734 --> 00:39:06,762 Wait. I can propose? 1014 00:39:07,076 --> 00:39:09,777 ♪ ♪ 1015 00:39:16,593 --> 00:39:17,859 Hey, Rebecca. 1016 00:39:17,884 --> 00:39:18,662 Oh, hey, Darryl. 1017 00:39:18,687 --> 00:39:20,936 You know, as great as this system is... 1018 00:39:20,961 --> 00:39:22,894 And it is truly groundbreaking... 1019 00:39:22,919 --> 00:39:24,518 I know what I need to do. 1020 00:39:24,543 --> 00:39:25,709 I need to be an adult. 1021 00:39:25,734 --> 00:39:27,934 And I need to have an open and honest conversation 1022 00:39:28,101 --> 00:39:29,303 with each of these guys 1023 00:39:29,328 --> 00:39:32,229 and finally just make a choice once and for all. 1024 00:39:33,076 --> 00:39:34,586 It's funny you should say that, 1025 00:39:34,611 --> 00:39:36,645 because I've been asked to bring you somewhere. 1026 00:39:39,350 --> 00:39:40,515 Wait. I think... 1027 00:39:40,540 --> 00:39:42,173 You guys, there, there, there, there. Hmm? 1028 00:39:42,198 --> 00:39:43,897 Oh. Oh. 1029 00:39:45,227 --> 00:39:47,227 Whoa. 1030 00:39:47,252 --> 00:39:49,186 - Hey. - Hi. 1031 00:39:49,367 --> 00:39:50,800 I guess "sup" is the only greeting 1032 00:39:50,825 --> 00:39:51,991 that hasn't been used yet. 1033 00:39:52,199 --> 00:39:54,566 Look, Rebecca, this is, uh... 1034 00:39:54,591 --> 00:39:56,436 Well, this is insane, and I can't believe 1035 00:39:56,461 --> 00:39:59,328 I'm forming these words, but we've all agreed... 1036 00:39:59,353 --> 00:40:03,388 W-W-We're proposing you go on three dates with three guys. 1037 00:40:04,912 --> 00:40:06,498 Nine dates? 1038 00:40:07,191 --> 00:40:09,904 I mean, that's... that's such a weird number. 1039 00:40:09,929 --> 00:40:12,696 No, no, no. Uh, one date with each of us, 1040 00:40:12,721 --> 00:40:16,217 and then at the end of that, you make your decision. 1041 00:40:16,242 --> 00:40:17,441 Oh. 1042 00:40:17,940 --> 00:40:20,123 Uh, if you're comfortable with the plan. 1043 00:40:20,148 --> 00:40:21,748 Yeah. Only if it's okay with you. 1044 00:40:22,463 --> 00:40:25,298 So, what do you think? 1045 00:40:25,322 --> 00:40:29,322 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 75547

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