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generate the
I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
and I'm going to be a little bit more
So
National Theatre of Mount44
I do not advertise myself
as worthless
I was my uncle and I returned from Australia to succeed to as much of his business as I can persuade his clients to trust me with her.
I have heard him speak of you and I naturally concluded that as you had been packed off to Australia you must be worthless.
However, it does not matter as my business is very simple. I desire to make my will leaving everything I possess to my husband.
You can hardly go wrong about that I suppose.
I could do my best, press it down.
I should sit down when I feel tired.
As you please.
Well, before I drop the wheel it will be less a swift moment to know who your husband is.
My husband is a fool and a blagarge will stake that fact in the will.
You will add that it was his kind of drove me to commit suicide.
But you have not committed suicide.
I shall have when the wheel is signed.
Oh, of course, quite so. It's not stupid of him.
And his name is...
His name is Alistair Fitzsauff.
What the am I the tennis champion and heavyweight boxer?
You know him.
Every morning we swim together at the club.
The Queen turns down to your little credit.
I'd better tell you that he and I are great friends, Mrs Fitzsauff.
Do not call me by his detestable name. Put me in your books as Epiphania, O Miss Auntie G. Parega.
Oh! Oh, indeed, on a proud seat.
Sit down yourself and don't fuss.
Yes, if you will prefer it certainly.
Your father was a very wonderful man, madam.
My father was the greatest man in the world.
And he died a pauper. I shall never forgive the world for that.
A pauper, you amaze me.
It was reported that he left you with his only child, 30 million.
What was 30 million to him? He lost 150 millions.
He promised to leave me 200 millions. I was late with a big with 30.
The humiliation of it.
The reak of a million and a half.
You forget the death duties. I had barely 700,000 years.
You know what that means to a woman brought up on an income of seven figures?
The humiliation of it.
Take my breath away, madam.
As I am about to take my own breath away, I have no time to spare for yours.
Oh, the suicidest, I've forgotten that.
I heard you, indeed. But would you please put your mind to it for a moment and make a will for me to sign,
leaving everything to our list.
To humiliate a world or ruin him, to destroy him, to make it a bigger on horseback that he may ride to the devil.
My nigga used to his head like sooner did work on him.
I also haven't seen that happen.
But you can't be sure. You might marry some sensible woman.
All right.
Make it a condition of the inheritance.
But with an amount from my funeral, he marries a little female named Polly Cede, ducking.
Funny name.
A real name is Patricia Smith, but I let us to Ann Stara sign Polly Cede's ducking.
As a hymn, I suppose, that she wants him to buy her another dozen.
I'd like to know, Polly.
Pray why.
Well, if Ann is our professor to you, she must indeed be worth knowing.
I shall certainly make him introduce me.
You are hardly tactful to a serious circle.
No, that won't matter when you've taken this.
What is it?
To the suicide.
I'll have to sign the chemist book for the sign I said to a wasp list.
The tartaric acid is harmless, so the chemist will think who wanted to make lemonade.
I am put to two separately in just enough water to dissolve them.
And when you mix the two solutions, a tartaric and potash will combine to make tartly of potash.
This being insoluble will be precipitated to the bottom of the glass, and the supernate
and fluid will be pure hydrocyanic acid, the one sip of which will kill you like a thumb about.
You seem to take my death rather cooly, Mr. Stagam.
I'm used to it.
You mean you have so many clients driven to despair that you keep a prescription for?
I do.
It's infallible.
I'm just sure they've all died painlessly and instantaneously.
No, they're all alive.
Alive?
The prescription for home is fraud.
No, it's a deadly poison, but they don't take it.
Well, it's...
I don't know, but they never do.
Well, I will.
And I hope you will be home to forgive it.
I'm only acting as your solicitor.
You say I'm going to convince you aside that you've come to me for advice, so I do my best
while.
Say that you will die without wasting a lot of gas or jumping into this appetite.
As fixneights can, I shall charge your executives.
What for advising me? How to kill no sis?
Not today, tomorrow.
Why put it off, Jill, tomorrow?
Well, it can do as well tomorrow as today.
And something amusing might happen this evening.
Or even tomorrow evenings, no, Harry.
You are a brute.
A beast and a pig.
You don't even ask what has driven me to this.
My life means nothing to you.
You make money out of the death of your clients.
You will be a lot of business connected with your death.
Alastair, sure to come to settle your affairs.
And you think I'm going to kill myself to make money for you?
Well, it's you, raise my expectations, Madam.
Oh, God, listen, which will this man?
Has it ever occurred to you that when a woman's life is wrecked, she needs a little sympathy, not no to bottle of poison?
I really can't sympathise with suicide.
It doesn't appeal to me, Samhara.
Still, if it has to be done, it'd better be done promptly and scientifically.
You don't even ask what Alastair has done to me.
What matter what he's done to when you're dead?
Why bother about it?
You are an unmitigated hog, Julia Samhara.
Why am I, you might be the prescription of your everything?
Damn your prescription, Dad!
Oh, it's infallible.
Well, now that you've known off steam, the sabbatians will sit down and tell me all about it.
Call the out-cry of an anguished heart, bluing off steam.
Well, what else could you call it?
You're not a man.
You're a rhinocillus. You're also a fool.
No, I'm only a solicitor.
You're a rotten solicitor.
You're not a gentleman.
You insult me.
You're a stress. You back up my husband against me.
You have no defense in.
You're a fish with the soul of a black beak, old you're out.
Yes, I hear, and I congratulate myself on the number of actions for libel.
I actually have to defend if you do me the honor of making me your solicitor.
You are wrong.
I never utter a libel.
My father instructed me most carefully in the law of libel.
If I questioned your solvency, that would be a libel.
If I suggested that you are unfaithful to your wife, that would be a libel.
But if I say that you are a lionoceros, which you are a most unmitigated rhinoceros, that is only vulgar abuse.
I take good care to confine myself to vulgar abuse, and I have never had an action for libel taken against me.
Is that the law, or is it not?
I really don't know. I look it up in my mind.
You need not to instruct you that it is the law.
My father had to instruct his lawyers in law solicitors a no good at law.
They are only good at practices, they call it.
My father was a great man.
Every day of his life he did things no one else ever dreamed of doing.
I may not perhaps be a great woman, but I am his daughter, and as such I am an unusual woman.
You will take the law from me and do exactly as I tell you to do.
That will simplify our relations considerably, madam.
And remember, I have no sense of humor. I will not be loved.
I shouldn't dream of laughing at a client with the income of three quarters a million.
Have you a sense of humor?
Have you a sense of humor?
Fine, keep it in check, but I am afraid I have a little.
You appeal to it somehow.
Then I tell you, in cold blood, after a careful consideration of my words, that you are a heartless black out.
My distress, my disgrace, my humiliation, a horrible mess and fear I have made of my life seem to you merely find it.
I know anything about your distress, your disgrace, the mess you made of your life and all the rest of me.
How can I laugh at things I don't know?
If I am laughing, and am I really laughing?
I assure you, I'm laughing not at your misfortune, but at you.
Oh, indeed, you realize you can't make a figure in my misery?
What is your misery?
Don't do praise if that's all.
Oh, you think so? When I get in your head, don't let you stick into a client.
Don't.
I said it well.
For blind job.
Oh! I cannot even give you a chair without breaking it. My life is curd.
I last, lost, full, clown.
My best big head will wake up.
It's a cost before Guinness.
Now, will you please sit down as gently as you can and stop calling my names?
And then, if you wish, you can tell me what on earth is the matter?
Lacking of that sounds,
colour, mood and relieved me somehow.
I feel as though I'd broken your neck because I wanted to.
Listen to me, and don't stand over me like that.
Sit down, or just left the bill, share and take away.
Trust me, man.
Oh, go ahead.
My father was the greatest man in the world. I was his inner child.
His one dread was that I should make a foolish man age and lose what little money he was able to leave me.
But 30 millions.
Don't you interrupt.
He made me promise that when every man asked me to marry him,
I was to impose a condition on my consent.
So what condition?
I was to give him 150 pounds and tell him that if within six months he changed that 150 pounds into 50,000, I was his.
If not, I would never see him again.
I saw the wisdom of this.
Nobody but my father could have thought of such a real, infallible and sentimental test.
I gave him my secret promise that I would carry it out tastefully.
And you broke that promise, I see.
What do you mean broke that promise?
Well, you married our staff.
Now, I listed as a dear good fellow and he's one of the best in his way.
But you're not going to persuade me he made 50,000 pounds in six months with a capital of 150.
He did.
Why is, as my father was, he sometimes forgot the wise things.
He said five minutes after he'd said them.
He warned me that 90% of our self made millionaires are criminals who take a 500 to one chance and get away with it by pure luck.
I listed how was that sort of criminal?
No, not a criminal. That's not like Alistair.
He's a fool perhaps in business, but not a criminal.
Like all solicitors, you think you know my husband better than I do?
I tell you.
Alistair came back after six months' probation with 50,000 pounds in his pocket.
Instead of the penal servitude he's so richly deserved.
That man's like a six-troll, only he always wins.
He wins a tennis-y-wincer boxing.
He won't me the richest heir is an incant.
You were a consenting party.
It's not. Why did you put him to the test? Why did you give him 150 to try his luck with?
Boxing.
Boxing?
Yes. Is his boxing fascinated me?
My father always held that a woman should be able to defend herself.
He made me study judo.
Judo?
Do we Hebrew?
Hebrew nonsense.
Judo, jujitsu. It's what common people call jujitsu.
I could throw you through that window as easily as you had with that rotten chair.
Japanese restaurant?
A restaurant for a lady?
Oh, dare you call judo a sport. It's a religion.
Forgive me.
Go on with your story and please break it to me as gently as you can.
I've never had a plant like you before.
You'll never will again?
No, I don't. That is remote.
Tell me, where does Alistair come in?
I saw him in an amateur heavyweight championship.
He has a solar plexus punch, no other boxer can miss Dan.
You married a man because he had a superlative solar plexus punch.
Well, he was handsome.
His script well unlike most handsome men.
I'm not insusceptible to sex appeal very far from it.
Not quite like you'll even go into details.
Well, if I like, it is your business as a solicitor to know the details.
I made a very common mistake.
I thought this irresistible athlete would prove an ardent lover.
There's nothing of the sort.
All his ardour was in his fists.
Never shall I forget the day it was during our honeymoon.
When his coldness infuriated me to such a degree that I went for him with my sin.
He knocked me out with that abominable punch in the first exchange.
Have you ever been knocked out by a punch in the solar plexus?
No, thank you. I'm not a pugilist.
It does not put you to sleep like a punch on the jaw.
When he saw most, he's contorted in arcing and ipodity, writing on the floor.
He was horrified.
He said he did it automatically.
He always, he continued that way.
You know, the very instinct.
I almost respected him for it.
And why do you want to get rid of him?
I want to get rid of myself. I want to punish myself for the horrible mess I've made of my life and to marry in an imbecile.
And now you put me off your phone and I don't know what I want.
That's a horrible state of road.
I'm a woman who must always want something and always get it.
An acquisitive woman, precisely.
It's husbanding.
Excuse me.
Yes.
Oh, one woman, hold the line.
Your husband is outside with a woman.
They want to see me.
That woman has a minute wait.
But can I depend on you to control yourself?
You can depend on Alice Daz's fists.
I must have a look at see these stockings. Have them in I tell you.
Send Mr Fitzfasten on the lady, I'm pleased.
We shall now see the sort of woman for whom he has deserted me.
Why?
I'd throw the ice-baked honey marvus.
Don't be a fool.
It's that something utterly common.
Hey, what are you doing, your?
I just want you to help the female.
The Trisha Smith is my name, Mrs Fitzfasten.
That is not how you sign your letters, I believe.
And I don't begin making a rawr weapon.
I was not speaking to you. I was speaking for the woman.
You have no right to call her a woman.
Nana, Ali, you promised me.
Promised you?
How dare he promised you?
What wait had he to promise you?
How dare you make him promise you?
I won't have Polly and Sutter. You don't mind Miss Smith, do you?
No, I don't mind. My sister goes on just like that.
Your sister, you presume to compare your sister to me.
Well, only when she goes off at the D-Pair.
Now, you must mind me, there's nothing like letting yourself go for a built that way.
Introduce me to the gentleman, Ali.
Yes, of course I forgot to mention.
And Mr Julius Sagamore, my solicitor, an old pal, Miss Smith.
Ali, Ali, Sutter.
That's only a pet name, Mr Sagamore.
Smith is the patronymaker's dear, wise old father, Sir.
She stepped up a wise father, this is the last.
Don't do, Sir. Don, Miss Smith, won't you?
Hello. What's happened to the chair?
I have happened to the chair. Let it be a warning to you.
Mr Sagamore, it's like this, Aniston.
You indeed not explain.
I have explained everything to Mr Sagamore.
And will you please have the decency and his presence and in mind to refer to my husband as Mr Pith Thaoundon, his Christian name is no concern of yours.
What if you won't give anyone speak?
I am not preventing you, nor anybody from speaking, if you have anything to say of yourself.
Hey, Mr Sagamore, I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
I have been here for a long time.
My psychology is not as young as I am.
It was not like that for people who are like that.
My world is not your world.
Every woman has her own world within her own soul.
Mr Sagamore, I married this man.
I admitted him to my world.
The world, my imagination of people was heroes and saints.
Never before I had a real man being permitted to enter it.
Oh, statement, lather.
All in one, what he really was, you can see for yourself.
I won't stand for this.
Yes, go ahead.
Strike me, chill her your knockout punch.
Let her see how you treat women.
Oh, damn!
No, don't get rampful down.
You've only put yourself in the wrong before, Mr. Saggum.
Or I think you'd better go home, let me have a go out with her.
Would you have the goodness not to speak of me as her?
My name is Mrs. Fitzafazand, and I am not a printer.
Sorry about your name, such a town, Mr. Saggum.
Or don't you think, Alia, better go?
It's not right that we should argue about into his space.
Besides, he's worn out.
He's hardly slept all night.
Oh, do you know that, Prey?
Look, mind how I know it, I do.
It was innocent.
But why was I to go after you'd driven me out of the house with your tantrums?
You went to hell!
I went to miss Spiff.
She's not a pronoun, you know.
I went to where I could find peace and kindness to my good, sweet, darling, poly, so that.
Well, I have no sense of humor, but this chimes me as there is simply happening.
You hate me, you hate you, you hate you, you live at me.
You spend the night in me.
And the arms of steedies.
Oh, okay.
Now why tell you it was innocent.
But in your arms, or what do you know?
Yes, of course, Alia.
Well, it was for a while, but not in the way you knew.
Oh, then he's even a more sexless fish than I took him for.
But, really, a man capable of flamasting out of the house
when I was on the point of pardoning him and giving him a night of legitimate bliss,
is capable of any embecilator.
Pardon him.
Pardon him if I want.
What have I done when you flew out at me?
No, you don't fly out at your.
I've never lost my dignity, even under the most insufferable role.
You hadn't been in it wrong, so you drove me out of the house.
I did not.
I never meant you to go.
It was a bummer, but it still fits your view.
You had your steedies, docuums, to go to a head-new body, Adrian,
without a towel.
Adrian?
Oh, this is a new publication.
Who's Adrian?
Adrian is Mrs. Fitzfest and his Sunday husband, Mr. Sagglemore.
Now what did you say?
Your Sunday husband?
Do you understand?
What Adrian Blender Bland is to you, as it were, what allies to me.
I don't quite follow.
What is Mr. Blender Bland to you, Mrs. Fitzfestenden, if I may ask?
Well, he is a general woman with whom I discuss
subjects which are beyond my husband's mental grasp,
which is extremely limited.
He's a chap who sets himself up to be an intellectual,
because he's part of the publisher.
He makes up to it there, and pretends that he's in love with her
because she has a good cock.
I tell her that he cares for nothing but his food.
He always calls it meal time, a very god I call him,
and I am expected to put up with this.
And if I so much as look at Boris, oh my!
Hises are completely different.
Adrian worships the ground I tread on,
and you do things to see these stockings,
worships the ground, and you tread on,
you flatly also grossly,
strangers you and pet you because you buy her stockings
and anything else you may be short of.
But I never contradict to anyone,
because he only makes trouble.
And I'm afraid I do cost him a good deal,
because he likes me to have nice things,
and I can't afford you.
No, you don't.
Now you don't have my gutter, you're as good as go.
What, I'm always pressing things on you that you won't take,
and you're a jolly, a cyborg of my mother and I and myself.
Oh, it's hot.
You are the Sunday wife, I suppose.
No, I should say that you are the Sunday wife, Mrs. Kassedon.
So I'd have to look after his clothes
and make him get his hair cut.
Surely the creature's intelligent enough to do that,
but it's not really the same.
You don't understand men.
They get interested in other things
and they let themselves, unless they have a woman to craft to them.
You sit and just sack.
It's like there's two sorts of people in the world.
The people that anyone can live with are the people that no one can live with.
But the people that no one can live with may be very good-looking
and splendid and temperamental and romantic and all that,
and they can make a man or a woman happy for half an hour,
if they're pleased with themselves and disposed to be agreeable.
But if they're trying to live with them,
then they eat up your whole life running after them or quarreling
or attending to them one way or another.
They can't call us a sown around.
A Sunday husband survives to have a good tearing bit of love making with
or a blazing rattle.
Or mostly one on top of the other, once a muckler.
So they're all right.
Just breaking apart and just...
What's the...
Yes, sir, sir, I am the Sunday wife and won't pray for you.
You're I'm the angel of the house, if you follow me.
You're his do-all-nap, that's what you are.
You're a very useful thing if you want the house kept tidy, dear.
Excuse me.
Yes.
Did you say Blenderblound?
Andrea!
How did you know I was there?
You asked the gentleman to wait for me.
Perhaps you'll tell me something about him, Mrs. Fitzpint.
Is he the trouble of Blenderblound's literary penny-worths?
Oh, no, no, that is his father who created the business.
Adrian is on the board, but he has no business abilities.
He's on 15 boards of directors on the strength of his father's reputation
and is never as far as I know contributed an idea to an else.
Oh, no.
Bit fair to him, Eddy.
I mean, no one in London knows how to ward it in that better.
I mean, this is what keeps him at the top in the city.
Oh, thank you.
I think I have his measurements sufficiently.
Shall I have him in?
But, look, I want to know what he's doing here.
Yeah, I don't plan.
Who do I understand, of course, that I'm not supposed to know anything
of his relations with my wife, or whatever they may be?
They are completely innocent, so far.
I am not quite convinced that I love Adrian.
He makes himself a girl, but with whom, as I have his own.
Will you send Mr. Blenderblound him?
You will now see the blighter who has cut me out with epic.
Oh, I can't imagine any man cutting you out with any woman, dear.
Would you be good enough to restrain your India?
I know of your India and when he comes in.
Hello, where do we all come from?
Good morning, Mrs. Fitzvaz and then.
How do Anna's there?
Mr. Sagglemore, I presume, I did not know you would engage.
Your arrival is quite opportune, so we have the good list to sit down.
Thank you.
I hope I'm not interrupting this later.
No, no, not at all, don't mind me.
Miss Smith, an intimate friend of Mr. Fitzvaz and...
He's to me, too, I'm sure.
The fact is, Mrs. Fitzvaz and then mentioned your name to me in conversation,
as her choice of a new solicitor, so I thought I could not place myself in better hands.
Excuse me, how do you not have a solicitor of your own?
Oh, my dear, Mr. Sagglemore, never be content with a single opinion.
When I feel ill, I always consult at least half a dozen doctors.
The variety of their advice and prescriptions convinces me that I better cure my children.
When a legal point arises, I always consult six solicitors with months of sacred risk.
No, I have no sense of humor.
No, it's not.
It's all nonsense. It's supposed to be a family.
Did you come here to consult Mr. Sagglemore about me?
I did, but of course I expected to find him alone.
Oh, and here we are, the hoke of verbal.
I was speaking to Mr. Blender Blender, and I was not speaking to you.
And I'm not a member of your kaboodle, as you called.
Sorry, dear. Just a reminder, I'm still listening.
Has the matter on which you wish to consult with any reference to Mr. Fitzpherson and his family circle?
It has.
Yes.
Is it of such a nature that sooner or later it will have to be discussed amongst all the adult members in that circle?
Well, yes, I suppose so, but hadn't we better talk about it a little bit in private first?
No, sure, do not have my affairs discussed in private or in public. They concern myself a little.
May I not discuss my own?
Don't wait, my solicitor, I will not have it.
If the amount is off in the deep end again, we will as well go over the deep end.
The deep end is the deep end. What is life if it is not to be lived at the deep end? No Alice Dow.
What a tadpole.
Don't do that.
Choose it for him, Angela Vahush.
Shouldn't make a start up like that.
Mr. Fitzpherson, why did you marry Mrs. Fitzpherson?
Why? What does that decry in the explanation?
I haven't read it to where I married him.
Although you may not think it, she can be frightfully fascinating when she rarely wants to be.
Why, mate, he not thinks about it. What do you mean?
Oh, he knows what I mean.
No, he's done silly joke, I suppose.
Don't be absurd. It's fastened and your wife is the most adorable woman on earth.
Not here, Adrian. If you're going to talk like that, let's go somewhere where we can be alert.
We haven't seen do before you drive us all crazy.
I'm steady as steady. I hope you know who I am.
You're all concerned.
I'll be there, but none of us get to be any instructions.
Haven't you better all be divorced.
What is the creature to live on? He has nothing.
He would have had to become a professional boxer or tennis player if his uncle had not pushed him into an insurance business, or he was perfectly useless.
Maybe I don't think Mr. Sagar wants to hear about it.
He does. He shall be silent.
Mr. Sagar, when Alice de proposed to me, it was too great an idiot to comprehend his own audacity.
I kept my father's promise.
I gave him a check for £150.
Turn this into £50,006, I said. And I am yours.
You never told me this?
Why should I? To revolt the story.
I'm not sure about it.
Did I make good or did I not? Did I risk hell to get the money and win your hand or did I not?
Do I understand you to say, Alice, that you made £50,000 in six months? Why not?
You may well look incredulous, Adrian, but he did.
This imbecile made £50,000 in one epiphania of Miss Antidiparega for his bride.
I kept my word and married him instantly. Then too late I discovered how he had made it.
Well, how did I make it? By my own brains?
Brains by your own folly, your own ignorance, and your criminal instincts and the luck that attends the half, which it was what you deserved was five years, penal servitude.
You're five years! 15 more like that, what I risked for you, and what did I get by? Living with you was far worse than any penal servitude.
It would have been heaven for you if nature had equipped you for such a companionship as mine.
But what was it for me? No man had ever been good enough for me. I was like a princess in a fairy tale offering my hand and fortune to any man who could turn my £150 into £50,000 within six months.
Ablemen, brilliant and the youngest sons of the nobly families either refused or failed to test why because they were too honest or too proud.
This thing succeeded, and I found myself tied for life to an insect.
When you may say what you like, but you adjust as much as I was with you.
Well, you were young, well shaped, well your lone tennis was outstanding, or a magnificent box, and he trapped it by physical contact with you.
Is it necessary to present very explicit, Mrs. Fitzp
The nonsense the creature doesn't know the difference between a cumulative preference and a deferred ordinary would know how to begin?
But how did he begin? My bank balances at present about £150. I should very much like to know how to make it up to £50,000.
You are so rich, Epivania, that you don't know how a man to whom £100 is considerable, some feels in the arms of a woman to whom a million is mere pin money.
You don't know how it feels to be a woman in the arms of a man who knows that you could buy him twenty times over and not miss the price.
If I give you £150, will you invest it for me? It is not worth investing. You cannot make money on the stock exchange until your weekly account is at least 70,000. You do not meddle with money, Adrian. You do not understand it. I will give you all you need.
No, thank you. I should lose my self respect. I prefer the poor man's luxury of paying for your cabs and flowers and theatre tickets and lunches at the rits and all the little sons who have occasion for when we are together.
It is quite true. I never carry pocket money about it. I got to do millions in all the £5,000. I will tell my bankers that you want a £1,000 account.
But I don't. I love lending you £5. Only as they run through my comparatively slender means at an appalling rate. I should honestly like a few lessons from Alistair in the art of turning hundreds into tens of thousands.
Yes, example would be useless to you, Adrian, because Alistair is one of nature's marvels and there is nothing marvellous about you except for appetite.
Do it's plain how Alistair made the £5,000? I leave him to tell the disgrace who tell himself. I believe he is proud of it.
Well, it worked out alright, but it was a new thing. I can tell you. What I did was this. I met an American.
And I told him that I was crazy about a woman who wouldn't marry me unless I made £50,000 in six months and I had only £150 in all the work.
He jumped up and said, well, I'm now alive. If you've got £150, you can open a bank account. You can get a checkbook. I said, well, what could you have a checkbook?
And he said, are we partners? 50-50? I said, yes. What else could I say?
That very day we started in. We launched the money and we took out a book of 150 checks. We took a theatre.
We engaged a first-rate company. We got a player. We had a splendid production. The girls were lovely. The scenery was lovely.
The principal woman was an angry-eyed creature with a queer, foreign voice and a Hollywood accent just to sort the public adorable.
We never asked the price of anything. We just went in up to our necks for thousands. That's how did you pay for all these things?
Who's our check? So didn't I tell you? We had a checkbook. But when the £150 was gone, the checks must have been decided. Not one of them. We credit them all.
I don't understand. What does credit mean?
It's quite simple. You pay for something with a check after the banks have closed to the day. If it's on Saturday or just before a bank holiday, all the better.
Now, say the check is for £100 and you have not paid any of the bank. You must then induce a friend or a hotel manager to cash another check for £100 for you. That provides for the previous check.
But it obliges you, on pain of 18 months hard labour, to induce another friend or hotel manager to cash another check for you for £200.
And so you go on spending and kiting from hundreds to thousands and risks of 18 months imprisonment to five years, ten years or forty years even.
And if you think that's an easy job, just try it for yourself. That's all I have. I dream about it. If I worse my...
Why? Part benign. We never saw that play. We never saw that theatre. After the first night, we were signing checks and kiting them all the time. Well, of course, it became easier after a while because as we began to pay our way, all right, we found it easier to get credit.
And the big expenses didn't come in until after the play was produced and the money started to come in.
I could have done it for half the amount. But do you mind?
Do you mind, silly? He couldn't keep himself up with me. It's exciting, wouldn't it?
Unless we paid twice as much as we needed for everything. But it didn't really matter. Once that money started to come in and my old mind did it come.
The whole town went mad about the angry-eyed woman. If we paid money in buckets full, we went to my head like drinking breads in Americans.
We went to the head of the Americans, American friends. We bought the rights. We bought the film rights, the touring rights, the translation rights.
I thought the rights didn't even know existed. And they sold them up to one another so that everyone in New York and in Hollywood and in London, they all had a rake off on them.
I only wanted 50,000 pounds. And so I cleared out with that and I went swanking back to Kamekis Ham and she thought I was great.
And I was great! The money made me great! I tell you, I was drunk with it. That was another man. And you can believe it a lot as you wish.
I had to. Were really too small for me. It was quite, it was quite sad and stupid. I quite innocent had no suspicion that money could work such miracles.
I possessed millions from my craving to make no more to me than they are. I breathed.
But just now when I suggested a divorce, you asked how he was to live. What has become of the 50,000 pounds?
He bought a circus with it. He thought everything he touched would turn to gold. Three weeks later I had to liquidate that circus.
He was about to turn the wild beasts loose and run away when I intervened. I was down 430 pounds, 16 and 7th and died the transaction.
Oh, was it my fault? The elephant got him to the end so that the Ministry of Health closed us down.
Wouldn't let me move on because they thought the animals would carry foot and master's eat.
At all events instead of being 50,000 to the good, I was 430 to the bad. And now I understand as the audacity to ask me for a divorce.
I don't. I said I'm more suggested that. I thought let you divorce me.
I mean, as your husband I enjoy a good deal of social consideration and the tradesmen give me unlimited credit for stockings among other things.
Hey, does she pay for you?
No, no, never mind. Look, I have shown that I can make money when I put to it. I will make money again and I will buy you all the silk stockings you need out of my own earnings.
Now, don't cry, darling.
Yeah, they think they're married already.
The matter is not in your hands, Mr. Fitzfistman. Mrs. Fitzfistman can divorce you.
Where do you like it or not? Do the evidence is that on a recent occasion you left your wife and took refuge in the arms of Mrs. Foxwood.
The courts will give Mrs. Fitzfistman a decree on that.
Well, let it. I can support out of Stette until he has time to make another fortune. You will think I'm a fool that is a dear, good boy.
And he disgusts me the way you all turn against him and the way his five streets seem like dirt under her feet.
What would she be without her money I'd like to know?
Nobody is anybody without money. City stockings my dear old father taught me that stick to your money, he said, and all other things shall be added unto you.
He said it was from the Bible. I've never very signed the quotation, but I've never forgotten it. I had stuck to my money and I shall continue to stick to it.
Which as I am, I can hardly forgive all the stuff for letting me down for 130.
16 or 7th, you stingy beast, but I'll pay it.
When you will, dear, I shall sell out my insurance and give it to you.
May I have that in writing, Miss Smith?
Oh, you ought to be a thing with yourself, you greedy pig.
What's your fault?
Why did you have the honor of going for £30?
It cost £200.
Don't get to wander from the point.
Well, what is the point, Prey?
The point is that you can obtain a divorce if you wish.
I don't wish.
Do you think I'm going to be dragged through the divorce court and have my picture in the papers with that thing?
I've had the story of my infatuation in headlines in every rag in London.
Besides, it suits me to be married.
It's respectable. It keeps other men off.
It gives me a freedom I could not enjoy as a single woman.
Besides, I am accustomed to a husband.
No, decide. You know, I will not divorce out of the store.
At least, nothing till I find a substitute for my rarely-walled,
couldn't divorce similar to the chose to lecture.
And it's just too much for the gentleman to mention it.
There's you very well know your own behavior.
It hasn't been so very none like that you don't have it shown up in court.
Alistair is the first man I ever loved, and I hope he went for the last.
But legal difficulties do not exist for people with money.
If all events in Salistair cannot afford to divorce men, I don't wish to divorce him.
The question does not arise. What a clock is it.
I do think you might buy a wristwatch, happy. I told you so over and over again.
Why should I go to the expensive bang, a wristwatch, when everyone else has one?
I've nothing to do but ask. It's ten past twelve.
Oh goodness, race. I've missed my lesson.
Oh, how annoying.
You listen. What are you learning now, Ma'am?
You do. When you're next indulge in your favourite sport of wife beating, look out for a surprise.
Mr. Sagamor, what did I come here for?
To give me instructions about your will. She draws up a new will whenever she loses her temper.
Sagamor, join a good business for you.
Do be quiet, Alistair. You forget the dignity of your position as my husband.
Mr. Sagamor, I have changed my mind about my will.
And I shall overlook your attempt to poison this.
Oh, thank you.
What do I hope you're for this abortive consultation?
13 and 4, Mr. Please.
Oh, that's what I never cared about.
It was my age in Linley 13 and 4.
Stop. Mr. Sagamor, you would better become my family, Alistair, and send in your bill at the end of the year.
And send a county court summons with you. Sagamor, or you may go with Sophia.
Do hold your tongue, Alistair.
Of course I wait for the summons. It's a simple precaution against paying bills sent in twice.
Quite, Mrs. Fitzpherson, in an excellent room.
Your amount of sense, Mr. Sagamor, I must get some fresh air.
This old jublinist dissertism in the room, Stasi, come along, Adrian. We'll drive into the country and lunch there.
I know the greatest little place, our brother. Good-bye, Mr. Sagamor.
Goodbye, CD stockings. Take care of Alistair for me.
His good looks will give your pleasing sensation down your spine.
Why, wait, Mr. Blenderland. What did you come for?
I totally forgot. I don't feel equal to any more this morning.
Your wife is the most extraordinary lady.
Can't find words for her poor dear.
Not Mr. Fitzpherson. May I ask what you came to consult me about?
I don't know. After ten minutes with that period, I know where I'm standing on my henna on my heels.
It was about a separation. Put yourself together with the idea.
Separation, your man's welcome. Try and separate yourself from a hurricane.
Come along, CD my darling. We mustn't waste a busy man's time.
Mr. Sagamor, you'll stand by us, won't you? You'll save Alistair from that awful woman. You'll save him for me.
I'm afraid I can't control her, Miss Smith. What's worse, you can't control me.
It's not only that I can't afford to offend so rich a client, it's that her will paralyzes mine.
Sort of genius some people have.
Don't be afraid of her, Mr. Sagamor. She has a genius for making money. It's in her family. Money comes to her.
I have my little bit of genius too, and she can't paralyze me.
What have you a genius for, Miss Smith, if I may ask?
Making people happy. Unhappy people come to me as money comes to her.
I can't think that your will is stronger than hers, Miss Smith.
We just need Mr. Sagamor. I have no will at all. I get what I want, son, huh? You'll see.
CD, come on.
Now, coming darling. Bye, Mr. Sagamor. You'll see.
I think I fell. Wait and see.
MUSIC
MUSIC
MUSIC
MUSIC
MUSIC
MUSIC
MUSIC
Oh, jolly.
I must be a very attractive man. Indeed. Well, not that I'm denying it, but what has it to do with what I just said?
You said how jolly. I look round at this rotten old inn, trying to pretend it's a riverside hotel.
We've just had a horrible meal with tomato tea, called soup. The remains of Sunday's joint, sprouts, potatoes, apple tart and stale American synthetic cheese.
If you can suffer this and say how jolly, there must be some irresistible attraction present, and I can see nothing that is not totally repulsive, except myself.
Don't you like these old world places I do? I don't. They ought all to be rooted up, pulled down, burnt to the ground.
You're flat on the endowment in London, costs more to furnish this place than to build in the sell-it of the roof.
You can get a decent lunch there, perfectly served by a word through the telephone. Your luxurious car will whisk you out to one of a dozen hotels in lovely scenery, and yet you choose this totally old inn and say how jolly.
What is the use of being a millionaire, is on such terms?
Well, I was supposed to get loose on the world with unlimited money. Do you know how long it took me to get tired of shopping and sick of the luxuries you think so much of?
About a fortnight. My father, when he had 100 million pounds, travelled third class and never spent more than 10 shillings a day on himself, unless he was entertaining people who were useful to him.
Why should he? He couldn't eat more than anybody else. He couldn't drink more than anybody else. He couldn't wear more than anybody else. Neither can I.
Why do you love money and hate spending it? Because money is power, money is security, money is freedom.
To me, money is a vulgar boy. I'm a soul destroying money. I need it, of course, but I don't like it. I never think of it when I can possibly help it.
If you don't think about money, what do you think about? Women?
Of course, not exclusively.
Food?
Well, I am not always thinking about my food, but I am rather particular. As I confess, I look forward to a better lunch than that.
Oh, oh, so that is what is put right in ten parts.
I am not out of temper, I hope. But you promised me a very special treat at the Thania. You said you found a wonderful place on the river where we could be ourselves and enjoy a delightful cottage meal and primitive surroundings.
Where is the charm of this dismal whole? Have you ever eaten a biome of lunch? There is not even a private city. Anyone could walk in here at any moment.
It's been much more comfortable at Richmond or Mainehead. And I believe it is raining.
Oh, is that my fault?
It completes your notion of a happy day on the river.
Why is it that the people who know how to enjoy themselves never have any money and the people who have money never know how to enjoy themselves?
You are not making yourself a very agreeable age, I am not entertaining me very municiously at the Thania.
Oh, for heaven's sake, let's get into the car and drive about the country as much more like serious than this hideous coffee of old man maltripe.
I am tired of my car.
I am not. I wish I could afford one like it.
I thought you would enjoy visiting in this crazy out of the way place talking to me.
But I find all nothing would spoil their battery. You think about nothing but your food and your little comforts, your worth, and allister.
Lister, you could talk about tenants and boxings.
And you can talk about nothing but money.
And you think money, uninteresting. Oh, you should have known my father.
I am very glad I did not.
What did you say?
Lighter at the Thania. If we are to remain friends, I may as well be perfectly frank with you.
Everything you've told me about your father convinces me that he was no doubt an affectionate parent and amiable enough to explain your somewhat handsome father fixation as Dr. Freud would call it.
He must have been quite the most appalling bore ever to devastate even a rotary club.
My father, you infinite nothingness.
My father needs one hundred and fifty million pounds. You never even made half a million pounds.
My good girl, your father never made anything.
I have not the slightest notion of how he can try to get a legal claim on so much of what other people may be.
You want to?
It's not so common that I have a rasping lot.
You might have heard that.
Then it's too expensive.
But you wish yourself dead.
Scum.
Filled.
Help!
Help!
I have a man in my house!
Help!
Help!
Help!
Hey!
Police!
Help!
Help!
Police!
Help!
I!
I!
I!
You!
Proced!
You killed me!
I'm an Egyptian doctor. I hear a great disturbance. You coming here in convulsions. Can I help?
I am dying.
I'm not quite well. I'm not quite well. I'm not the point of death. I need a doctor and the rich woman.
In that case, you will have no difficulty in finding an English doctor. Is there anyone else here who needs my help? The noise was of somebody falling downstairs.
Never mind him. If he broke an if he broke an if he's broken his body it's no more than he deserved.
Come back, Eastern, can I run you? Come back! Come back!
Please, please, please, please.
Landlord is staying in a gentle end of the college hospital in your car.
In my car, I will not put my cigarette in here.
In my car, I will not finish it, let them get a moment.
The car has gone.
You should be very glad that it is being so useful.
It is your business to doctor me, not to lecture me.
I am not your doctor. I am not in general practice.
I keep a clinic for penniless, more Hamilton refugees,
and I work in the hospital. I cannot attend to you.
You must attend to me. You shall attend to me.
Are you going to abandon me here to die?
You are not dying. Not yet, at least.
Your own doctor will attend to you.
You are my own doctor, I tell you.
I am a rich woman. Doctor, please, and nothing to me.
Charge me what you please, but you mustn't shall attend to me.
You are a bone-minably ruined, which will inspire confidence as a doctor.
If I attended all those in whom I inspire confidence, I should be worn out in a week.
I have to reserve myself for poor and useful people.
Then you are either a fool or a go-to-vic.
I am nothing but a servant of our last.
You are not. You are my doctor. I am a sick woman.
You cannot abandon it, die in this wretched place.
I see no symptoms or any sickness about you. Are you in pain?
Yes, horrible pain.
Where?
Don't cross examine me as you didn't believe me.
I must restrain my wrist-string and beast all over the place.
Which hand?
No, no, no.
Then this one.
Nothing whatever the matter.
How do you know it's my hand, not your?
You would scream the house down if you had strained your wrist.
You're shaming, lying, why?
Is it to make yourself interesting?
Make myself interesting, man. I am interested.
Not in the least, medically. Are you interesting in any other way?
I am the most interesting woman in England. I am Ephifano, Miss Santi Di Pereira.
Never heard of her. Italian aristocrat, I presume.
Aristocrat, you take me for a fool.
My ancestors were many lenders to all of Europe 500 years ago.
Now we are bankers of old world.
Jewess, eh? Christian to the last drop of my blood.
The stupidest Di Pereira can walk round the cleverest Jew
when it comes to money making work.
You only realize the aristocracy in the world, the aristocracy of money.
The plutocracy in fact.
If you like, I am a plutocrat of the plutocrats.
Well, that is a disease for which I do not prescribe.
The only known cure is a revolution.
But the mortality rate is high, and sometimes if it's the wrong sort of revolution,
it intensifies the disease.
I can do nothing for you, and I should go back to my work.
Good morning.
But this is your work. What else have you to do?
There is a great deal to be done in the world, besides attending rich, imaginary, invalies.
But if you are paid well.
I make the little money I need by work which I venture to think more important.
Then you are a pig, a beast.
And a mulch, I think. It's the most vulnerable thing.
Leave me here to my distress. My car is gone.
I have no money. I never carry money, I've had.
I have none to carry.
Your car will return presently. You want to borrow money from your chauffeur?
You are an unmitigated hippopotamus.
You're a bachelor's suicommate, known it by the ridiculous tar-booch.
You should take it off in my presence.
At least have the manners to wait with me until my chauffeur comes back.
He has come back.
But don't.
Can't you wait until he's had a cup of tea in the cigarette?
No.
Please give me back my pears.
I wanted to see what you look like without it.
No.
Now, listen to me.
You're having an adventure.
Have you no room, I've seen you?
How did you even come and carry off?
You didn't want to know why I threw that beast downstairs.
Didn't you want to throw your wretched work to the devil for once and have an afternoon on the river with an interesting and attractive woman?
You mean I'm neither interesting nor attractive to me, except when they are ill, I know too much about them inside and out.
You are perfectly well.
Liar.
Nobody is perfectly well.
No, ever has been.
No, ever will be.
That is true.
You must have brains of a sort.
I remember when I began as a young citizen.
I'd used several patients by my operations because I had been taught that I must go on cutting until there was nothing left but perfectly healthy.
Perfectly healthy tissue.
I said, no such thing as perfectly healthy tissue.
I should have cut my patients entirely away if the nurse had not stopped me before they died on the table.
They died after they left the hospital, but as they were carried away from the table alive, I was able to claim a successful operation.
Are you married?
Yes, but you need not be afraid.
My husband is open there, unfaithful to me, and cannot take you to court if you make love to me.
I can divorce him if necessary.
And the man you threw downstairs was he.
And does not throw one's husband downstairs?
Did he make love to you?
No.
He insulted my father's memory because he was disappointed with his lunch.
When I think of my father, all ordinary men seem to be the mare's trash.
You are not an ordinary man.
I should like to see some more of you.
Well, now you have asked me confidential questions about my family, and I have answered them.
You can no longer pretend that you are not my family doctor, so that is settled.
The father fixation, you say. And an excess of money.
A fabulous 30 million.
A psychological curiosity. I will consider it.
Consider it.
You will feel honoured, gratified, delighted.
I see enormous self-confidence, retinced audacity, insane egotism, apparently sexless.
Sexless? Who told you the wrong sexless?
You talked to me as if you were a man.
There is no mystery, no separateness, no sacredness about men to you.
A man to you is only the male of your species.
My species, indeed.
Men is a different and very inferior species.
Five minutes' conversation with my husband will prove to you that he and I had not belonged to the same species.
But then I'll some great man like my father.
There are some good doctors like you.
Thank you.
What does your regular doctor say about you?
I have no regular doctor if I had.
I should have an operation a week until there was nothing left of me or of my bank account.
I shall not expect you to mourn the about the stethoscope if that is much more afraid of.
I have the lungs of a whale and the digestion of an ostrich.
I have a clockwork inside. I sleep eight hours, like a log.
When I wander anything, I lose my head about it so completely I always get it.
What sort of things do you want mostly?
Everything.
Anything.
Everything. Anything.
Is nothing.
Five minutes ago, I wanted you.
No, I have no.
You cannot bluff a doctor.
You may want the sun and the moon and the stars.
You cannot get them.
That is why I take great care not to want them.
I only want the things I can.
Good. A practical intellect.
What do you want at present, for instance?
That is the devil of it. There's nothing one can get except more money.
I do not care for money. I care only for knowledge.
Knowledge is no use without money.
Are you married?
I am married to science. One wife is enough for me.
Though by my religion, I am allowed for.
Oh. What do you mean?
I am what you call in Mohammed.
We all have to be content with two wives if you marry me.
Is there any question of that between us?
Yes.
I want to marry you.
Nothing doing, lady. Science is my bride.
You can have science too. I shan't be jealous of her.
I made a solemn promise to my father on his death.
Stop.
I have to tell you.
I made a solemn promise to my mother on her death bed.
Right.
My mother was a very wise woman.
She made me swear to her that if any woman wanted to marry me and I felt tempted,
I would hand the woman 200 piazztres and tell her that unless you would go out into the world with nothing but that,
and the clothes she stood in, and earn her living alone and unaided for six months, I would never speak to her again.
And if she stood the test, then I must marry her, even if she were the ugliest devil on earth.
And do you expect me, be apifan, your new sanctity, be regga, to submit myself to this test to any test?
I swore. I have a mother fixation. Allah, I willed it so. I cannot help myself.
What was your mother? A washer woman? A widow.
She brought up 11 children. I was the youngest.
The Benjamin, the other ten are honest working folk. With their help, she made me into a man of learning.
With her ambition to have a son who could read and write. She prayed to Allah, and he endowed me with a necessary talent.
And do you expect me to be beaten by an old washer woman?
I am afraid so. You could never pass the test.
Indeed. And my father's test for a husband worthy of me.
The husband is to be tested too. That had never occurred to me.
Not your mother either, it seems. Well, you know better now. I am to give you £150.
You are to increase it to £50,000 within six months. How is that for a test?
Quite conclusive. At the end of six months, I should not have one penny of it left. Praise me to Allah.
You confess yourself beaten. Absolutely. Completely.
And you think I am beaten too?
Hopelessly. You do not know what homeless poverty is. And Allah, the compassionate will take care that you never do.
How much is 200 pastors?
At the rate of exchange contemplated by my mother about 35 shillings.
Handed over.
Unfortunately, my mother forgot to provide for this contingency. I have not got 35 shillings. I must borrow them from you.
I never penny on me. No matter borrow from my shelter, he will end you £150 on my account if you dare ask.
Goodbye. For six months.
Thank you.
Thank you.
There is no might and no majesty saving thee, O Allah, but almost great and glorious. This is another of thy terrible jokes.
No!
Hey, get back down!
I am looking for employment.
A woman told me I should find a care. I am disappointed.
Now, wait and get him.
Oh, I am poking the nose into a place of hope to show you good. There are no women employed here.
You lie. There are six women working in there who employs them.
Oh, you talk to me. Think of a lot of you, though. Don't know what you take me for.
Oh, well. Take care. I can use my fists. I can shoot if necessary.
Oh, she is an inspector. Look at her shoes. I am not an inspector.
And what is the matter with my shoes?
Well, could a woman looking for work at Titan's 8-Me on hour before do we skin shield like that?
I can assure you we don't employ anywhere in here, but only caretakes.
But I saw a six women in there.
Oh, wow.
Oh, my soul. Go on, don't go, bloody patient.
We can see a lady like that.
You see, man? It's not a soul.
There's a smell. You've given them a signal to hide.
You are breaking the law.
Give me some work or I should send a close card to the home office.
Okay, lady, can't we arrange this?
You want good with it, do you? To get me into trouble and shut up while it was shot.
What good will it do, me? Is it say nothing?
Okay. Oh, we're trying to wait.
Hi, Captain. I'm on the path of crying a week.
If you look around a bit, there are others, you know?
Give me the address of the others if I'm delivered by a black male and I must have an extended practice.
I don't see one of the others, shouldn't look.
We'll check the arc lab. Look at it.
Listen to it.
Another one of those, every wedding, if you keep the inspector off of me.
It's now you swinging half-brains with me. I am a casket.
And I feel convinced you will pay five feelings if I insist.
Oh, sure. Perhaps I'm feeling forest. You don't know the struggle we have to live.
Yeah, we're not bad, those.
I'll pay what the business's going to afford. I'm not that many more.
You know, can I afford five shillings? You know, I don't afford any more.
So, yeah, take your five shillings and be down to you.
You should shut up.
You should shut it off, but you can't.
I don't have a tough walk without looking at a shoes.
She's got it.
Well, I don't like this black-wailing business. Of course, if I must, I must.
Can you not give me any manual work?
I want to get a little deeper into our business, don't you?
I am as deep as I can get already. You have six women working in there.
That thing in the corner is a gas engine. That makes you a workshop under the act,
except the sanitary rains and some cover-blurf warning.
There's nothing else I need to know.
I have you in the hollow of my hand. You'll give me work that I can live by,
or I'll have you cleared out of here like a wasps nest.
It's a mighty clear, anyway.
There's another place where you won't find me so easy. I'm used to changing my address.
One good card you have in your hand. You have some business ability.
Tell me.
Why can you not give me work to live by, just as you give it, I suppose, to those women I saw in you?
I don't like the people I employ to know too much.
They might call in the inspect.
Calling in?
Spake! I want you to fool our, you dreading, Inspector, more than I know!
Why, don't they want to be protected?
How do you expect to win protection, ma'am?
They'd only shut the place down and take their jobs away from them.
Or if they thought you'd be so cruel as to be put them, they'd go on their knees, do you, to spare them?
You that know so much about it, or to know business like this, can't afford any luxuries.
To keep labor business, as long as I can get women for their natural ways, I can get along with no luxuries, mind you.
Trade union, wages, no sanitary arrangements, wenches, your call, no line, washing only six months, no separate rooms, do you, isn't?
No fancy to do a dangerous machine, anything like that.
That'll business in a week.
What is a woman's natural way?
I can take you down for 12-hour, go.
It's savoury.
Oh, no, I'm, nobody wouldn't call that slavery. Good work at the mate, 12, 15, shillings a week at it. Week in and weeks out.
What the government paid at the beginning of the world?
You can't get me to pay more than British government!
Channel woman live on 12 shillings a week?
Of course she can, watch the presenter.
Then I will work even for that, just to prove that I can work and support myself.
So give me some work and I've done talking.
You started talking, you're a mate.
I did. I thank you for the information you have given me. It has been informative and to the point.
Is that sufficient to follow it?
No. It worked, it worked. I am an arid, it worked.
What sort of work can you do?
Can you sew? Can you make better notes?
Certainly not.
I don't call that work.
What sort of work are you looking for?
Brain work.
Well, she's Johnson.
You work, managing work, planning work, driving work.
Well, show me what you make here. Tell me how you dispose of it.
You get on with your work, show what you do.
And when you quite study, so on your curiosity, maybe you'll take a closer and go.
I don't find my arrival of pleasant sort of adventure in this den.
I never had to like a juke sheet, not from nobody.
Well, what do you do with it when I finish?
Men comes with this cart and takes it away.
Does he pay you for them?
No, he gives us a receipt for them.
Mr. Superflu pays us for the receipts at the end of the week.
What does he do with the coats?
Takes them to the old sale, what supplies him with the cloth.
The cart brings us the cloth when it takes away the finished clothes.
Why don't you deal directly with the old sailor?
No, that wouldn't be right.
We don't know who they are, Mr. Superflu does.
Besides, we couldn't afford all some carp.
Oh, Mr. Superflu will also guard?
No, that wouldn't be right.
He hides it by the hour from Bolton's.
Is it always the same driver?
Oh, yes, it's always off to him good enough.
Right, those names down.
Bolton's Superflu good enough.
You know, not your plug.
You will be soon, do as I tell you.
Now, when good enough comes around next, tell him to tell Bolton
that he has found somebody who will buy the horse and cart for £14.
Tell him if he can persuade Bolton's to part of it at that place,
you will give him a pound for himself and half a crown of valence
in his present wage to drive the same old round to the same place he knows the whole sailor.
Mr. Superflu is superfluous.
You don't speak that, you're the mind.
You're the mind.
You should think. Do you buy a horse and cart?
Where's the money to come from?
Where does all the money come from? The bank, of course.
You've got to put it in there first, haven't you?
Not at all.
All other people put it there and the bank lends it to you
who thinks you're going to extend your business.
Joe, don't trust your money in a bank.
No good ever come out of thanks for the likes of us.
Don't let their tempt you, Joe.
When had you last a holiday?
Three?
On the day?
We come before we're done with days.
Oh, I won on Armistice Day 18 years ago.
So it's constant world war and a slaughter of 20 million of your fellow creatures
to give you the one holiday in your lifetime.
I can do better for you then, right?
We don't understand that sort of talk.
We've got no time for it.
Look, wouldn't you just take our little present and go away?
No, no, no.
You turn good enough to the close.
Oh, sit though.
I'll deal with him.
Ten.
I don't know.
Hold your eyes, old young eyes.
I'm not lettering her.
Whether I'm older or old.
I love you.
I'm actually better than I understand you.
Those are the sounding necessary.
Tim, I don't know if he's quite convinced the villains will park in the horse
and carve for ten primes.
We'll do stop that.
Well, I'm going now.
There's not enough work.
I'm going now.
There's not enough work.
I'm going now.
I'm going now.
I'm going now.
I'm going now.
I'm going now.
I'm going now.
Well, I'm going now.
There's not enough work for me to do here.
I can do it all in the morning every week.
Just half a day.
I should take the job as a scallory maid in the hotel to fill in the train.
Meanwhile, carry on as usual.
Oh, honey.
Oh my gosh.
I'm so good at drawing.
Oh, oh, God, no!
How do you watch your tells us, Joe?
We're just like children.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh.
I say, she didn't just jolly.
Yes, Danny.
It's lovely.
Nothing meets a fine weekend on the river.
Put on the water in the morning to give one a good stretch,
and a good appetite, a good lunch,
a good laze, what more can any man desire on earth.
Oh, you know, so beautifully early.
I'd love to see you sculling and panting too.
Oh, you look so well standing up in that punt.
Well standing up in that punt.
It's the quiet of it.
The bestied quiet of it.
You're so quiet.
You know, I never afraid that you're going to kick up a row
about now.
The river is so smooth.
I do not know which comforts me,
those do you order with us?
Good afternoon, sir.
And I hope that everything here is to your liking.
Oh, yes, indeed.
But it's, it's, it's,
what is wrong with you, place?
I mean, when I was here last a year ago,
it was a common pub called the Pig and Whistle.
It was there until quite late, sir.
My father kept the old Pig and Whistle.
So did his forefathers,
right back to the reign of William the Conqueror.
It was on his last legs when you saw it, sir.
I was ashamed.
Oh, you've done a good job with it now, I must say.
It has nothing to do with me, sir.
I am only the manager.
You wouldn't believe it if I were to tell you the story,
but I mustn't disturb you.
No, no, no, no, my dear fellow, far away.
Well, one day a woman came here
and asked for a job as a skull.
My father didn't have the nerve to turn her out.
He said that she might just strive for a day or two.
So she started in.
She washed two dishes and she broke six.
My poor old mother was furious.
She thought the world of her dishes.
She said that as the girl had broken them,
she should pay for them,
even if she had to stay for a month
and have the price stopped out of her wages.
Off went the girl to Reading
and came back with a whole lot of new crockery
that made my poor old mother cry.
She said that we would be disgraced forever
if we would ever serve anything of such old-fashioned things.
But the very next day, in a American lady with a voting party,
bought them straight off the table for three times
what they cost.
My poor mother never dared to say another word.
From then on, the skeleton who made
took things into her own hands
in a way that we could never have done.
It was cruel for us,
but we couldn't deny that she was always right.
Cruel, but what was there cruel
and getting nice crockery for me?
It wasn't only that,
that part was easy and pleasant enough.
But what was wrong with the old pig in the soul
was not so much the old thick plate which took away or appetite,
but it was the old people that had
had gathered about itself
who were passed there,
a kind of never been up to much, according to modern ideas.
The scullery made simply told them
the truth about themselves,
and it cut them to pieces.
But it was the truth, and I couldn't deny it.
The old man had to give in
because he'd raised money on his freehold
and was at his wit's end
and now how to bait back his mortgage interest.
Before we knew what was happening,
the scullery made had paid off the mortgage
and had completely got the whip-hound of all of us.
It's time for you to sell your freehold and retache,
she said, you're doing no good here.
Oh, that's truthful to root the map like that.
It's horrible, but it was the truth.
And now the house is a credit to the neighbourhood
and gives more employment
than ever the old pig did,
even in its best days.
That I am the manager,
with a salary and a percentage beyond anything
that I could have ever dreamt of.
Are the old people contented and happy?
Well, no.
The change was too much for me at that time,
but my father had a stroke
and is not going to recover,
and my mother's gone a bit silly.
But it was best for them,
and they have all the comforts that they care for.
That's a very moving term.
Mark's earlier than you might think, my dear fellow,
because I happen to know a woman of that standard.
Oh, by the way,
I telegraphed a friend of mine
to come and spend the weekend here.
And Mr. Sagamore, I trust there'll be a room for you.
Oh, that'll be quite all right, thanks.
Have you made people staying in the house this weekend?
Oh, less than usual, madam.
We have an Egyptian doctor who takes his meals here,
then there is another gentleman, an invalid,
who's just been discharged from the cottage hospital.
The Egyptian doctor recommended our chef to him
and he takes his meals here, too.
And that is all, madam,
unless some fresh visitors arrive.
Well, I suppose we have to...
I'm sorry to trouble you, sir,
but you came in this morning without signing the visitors book.
I brought it in.
I wondered if it was...
Oh, yes, God, I'm so sorry.
Right.
Er...
There we are.
Oh, so much, sir.
Oh, indeed, sir.
We have honor there.
Anything wrong?
No, sir, nothing wrong.
You can create the contrary.
Mr. and Mrs. Fitzpastendom,
it's such an unusual name.
Have I the honor of entertaining the celebrated...
Yes, but I am the boxing champion and the tennis champion.
See, I'm here on holiday and I'd rather not talk about it anymore.
I quite understand, sir.
I wouldn't have mentioned it,
but the proprietors of this hotel,
the lady that I spoke to all,
is a Mrs. Fitzpastendom.
What?!
They cling out of this!
Feed it, pat the bags!
I want my bill beezing, Stuntley!
Sir, but she's not yet at present
and I do not expect her this weekend.
Oh, don't, sir, l!
Come with a week and a spoon!
May I say so that she won't come?
She's given up paying us unexpected visits
and I that she knows that she can depend on me.
Anastelle!
Miss Smith!
What does this mean, Sagamor?
You never told me who you'll reign and see.
You said, two friends!
Where, Mr. Blendland, we are?
He's the seal for which you sit down.
You gave him a...
What happened?
What have you done to yourself?
Everybody asks me what I have done to myself.
I haven't done anything to myself.
I suppose you mean this and this.
They are what your wife has done to me.
That is why Sagamor should not have brought me.
I'm sorry, I really haven't expressed this.
Oh, well, just sit down, Mr. Blendland.
Come and rest yourself, Anastelle.
Miss Cat.
Dear, dear.
We don't mind what Mrs. Fitzpastendom does.
But I do.
You are most kind, but I cannot claim the privilege of a friend
and at the same time be the plaintiff in an action
for assault and bannerate.
Well, yes, you can.
There's nothing new about the situation.
Now, do come and make yourself comfortable, Adrian.
Well...
Very kind of.
I really can't stand it a long.
But I don't understand why Sagamor should have played such a trick on me.
And of course, on you too.
Well, the truth of the matter is that Blendlandland won't be reasonable.
I thought you two might help me bring in to his senses.
No, you Sagamor.
£2,500 and costs, not a penny less.
Too much.
Too ridiculous.
£2,500 and medical expenses and costs.
And Cadbert, the cottage hospitalised by his.
Huh?
There, I went in her own car.
But now you mention it, I took the chauffeur.
Don't misunderstand.
It's not the money I mind.
It's the principle of the thing.
It's a question of honour, of self-respect.
Just how do you arrive at the figure?
Why, as your honour and self-respect,
were £2,500 and not £2,500 millions.
My brother got £2,500 from the railway company
who had an electric truck but it didn't to him on the platform at Paddington Station.
I will not let Epiphania off with less.
It was an unprovoked, brutal, cowardly assault.
I must dream this, Ollie, sir, that Mrs. Fitzpastenden is outside with the Egyptian doctor.
I really did not expect that.
You have allowed my husband to bring a woman to my hotel
and register her in my name. You are fired.
Excuse me, sorry, madam.
I have no idea that the gentleman was your husband,
however you were always right.
Would you like me to go to one socialised stand
and come to the place?
I do not wish you to go to all your re-engaged.
Fools and bayside, in fact.
Your manager cannot throw Alice to her, Ag.
Alice, thank you for all of the time.
This answer is...
An answer, Miss Smith, this is a licensed house
and she has as much right to be here as you or I.
I suspect fire to the hotel, if necessary.
Hello.
Adrian had two.
What has happened?
You're here, one of those sticks.
Four, same to the doctor at once.
Have you heard two or so?
Heard myself.
Heard myself.
Has he been run over?
This woman is heard too, man.
She asked me, have I heard myself?
I fell down the whole flight of stairs.
My ankle was strained, my knee was twisted,
the small bone of my leg was broken, my spine was ripped.
I had to give them a subscription at the cottage hospital,
away old man took me.
I had to go from there to a nursing home.
Trail, jennies, a week.
I had to call him three, hardly street surgeons,
and none of them knew anything about dislocating me.
They wanted to cut my knee open.
I had to go to a bone setter, and he charged me 50, jennies.
Well, why did you not walk down stairs properly?
Were you drunk?
I...
Oh, he decals that his injuries were inflicted by you
when you last met, Mrs. Dussel.
My moochy, here, my surprise, height from my curly.
No, did you deny that you assaulted him?
Of course I denied anything, though.
Most of the time I've never heard what happened
was he insulted my father grossly.
It was most unprovoked.
At a moment when I had every reason to expect the utmost tenderness
from him, the blood rushed to my head.
The next thing I remember was I was lying across the table,
trembling, dying.
The doctor who found me would tell you what my condition was.
I don't care what your condition was.
What condition did your chauffeur find me as?
He's taking an action against you.
An action? Very well.
You know my invariably rule.
Fight him to the last ditch.
No matter what it costs.
Take him to the house of lords, if necessary.
We shall see whose purse holds out the longest.
I will not be blackmailed.
You don't go father's man-aired places, you above the law.
Again!
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Toko my girl.
Toko.
Oh, she knows, Toko is an incredible medicine
for calming the nerves.
You are a witness.
A blow in the solo pexus in a day in bed.
That is Toko.
Do you want to witness Mr. Sagamor?
How are I going?
Get out of my husband's brutal violence.
He can talk to me.
If better, me kill me.
He is stronger than I am.
Just the last argument of the lower nature
against the higher.
Right?
In essence, is this.
Faith now, ladies and gentlemen.
Now you know how I feel.
It's a real right.
I do not wish to hear any more about Mr. Glendrobland
who's ridiculous in your ears.
I'm not dubious.
I'm not dubious.
I'm not doing this.
There's a reasonable necessity for us
but how we discuss the compensation due to Mr. Glendrobland
without mentioning his interest.
There is no compensation due to Mr. Glendrobland who deserved
what he got, whatever it was.
He will take an action against you.
And take one against him first.
What for?
Oh, never mind.
I didn't care.
Don't bother me about it.
It came 20,000 pound damages.
I tell you, I will not be blackmailed.
Neither will I.
I am entitled to compensation.
I mean, I have it.
You have no excuse.
Please.
No, I cannot advise neither of you to get law.
But quite seriously, Mrs. Glendrobland is entitled to some
compensation now.
You can afford it.
Mr. Glendrobland, a woman as rich as I am, cannot afford anything.
I have to fight to keep every penny I possess.
Every black manor, every swindler, every charity, every testimony
or every political cause, every league and brotherhood and
sister, whatever church and chapel, every institution of every kind on
every species from morning to night, trying to bleed me to death.
We can remove it if I let it fardingly I should be destitute by the end of the month.
I subscribe one minute a year to the income tax payers' defense fund.
And that is all.
Absolutely all.
My standing instructions to you are to fight every action.
And to forestall every claim for damages with a calendar claim for 20 times their
month.
That is the only way I can write across the sky, hands off my money.
You see, Mr. Glendrobland, it's no use.
He was withdrawing your threat of inaction.
I won't, if you will, you must.
We're wasting time with a £10 note and the dumbest.
£10 note, Mrs. Glendrobland.
It's £10 note.
It's £10 note.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no.
Don't not forget it, and it is no.
It's £2,500.
Not a penny, less.
Aye!
But, real, my child, I have underrated you.
Your cheek, your gluttony, your obstinacy, imposed respect upon me.
I threw a house baked gentleman down the stairs and my chauffeur picked him up off the meta-magneties
and clique complete.
Don't!
Five thousand for that Sagamole you hear?
Please, please, don't keep your tongue shut.
Go on!
Had my actual name, you for life, had you raised a bump on your head, has he called you a scum?
No, but you made it in a moment.
Oh, my Sagamole, my treasure!
Shaggy can five thousand old condition eternal ten for one million in six and eleven.
I will do what I like with it, I will have it unconditional!
Mr. Blemann, it's a mistake to go into court in the character of a man who's been called a scum.
It's also very difficult for a plaintiff to get sympathy in the character of a man who's been thrashed by a woman.
Now, if Mrs. Fitzpherson had stabbed you or shot you or poisoned you, that would have been quite in order.
So dignity would not have been compromised.
But Mrs. Fitzpherson, he knows better.
To come into court, use of address, looking her best.
Long before we can get the case into the list, the bump on your head will have subsided.
Or broken bone will have set, and the colour will have come back to your cheeks.
So, unless you can provoke Mrs. Fitzpherson to assault you again the day before the trial, and she's fast and clever for that.
The chances are, a million to one against you.
Yes, Blender Bland, you wouldn't stand a dog's child.
And it is quite right. Ask a nicely pretzel pay or expense.
Is there no justice for a man against a woman?
Believe me, no, not against a million hours.
And what justice is there for a millionaire as I should like to know?
Only the court should be...
I'm not talking of the court, so I was speaking of the justice of heaven.
Oh Lord, now I've for it.
Oh, how can we cheer our act?
Is it just? Because I am a millionaire as I cannot keep my husband, cannot keep even another, cannot keep anything except my money?
There you sit before my belly eyes, snuggling up to that insignificant little nothingness.
You cannot afford her in stockings, and you are happy.
She is happy.
Here is this suit of clothes on to sticks.
What does it contain?
Oh, let me alone, willow.
Something that once resembled a man, something that liked lending me five pound notes, never asked me to repay them.
Why kindness to me, you love of me, no.
The swank of a poor man lending to a millionaire as in my divine wrath I smashed him.
As a child smashes a disappointing toy, and when he was brought down to his real self, I found I was not a woman to him.
I was a bank account with a good cook.
I saw very well, dear, but the truth is no one can live with you, and anyone can live with you.
And apparently you can live with anyone.
What CD says is the God's truth, nobody could live with you.
Why? Why? Why?
They would use the more this is your personal, who would live with a tornado?
Is it as quick as an avalanche?
Yes, there are thousands of people live on the slopes of volcanoes in the track of avalanche, is it?
On lamps?
There are not any yesterday, by earthquakes.
With a millionaire who can rise to her destiny and wield the power, how money gives her a no?
Be it so?
I shall live in my lone little house and be myself.
Until I find a man good enough to be to me, what Alistair is to CD stockings?
Well, I have to wait too long, dear.
I never wait. I march on, and when I come upon anything, I want I grab it. I grab you, Alistair.
I find he does not suit me. He beats me.
Only in soft defense.
I never let a finger on you except in soft defense.
Yes, you are like all the great European powers, you only fight in self-defense.
You do not suit. I threw you to greedy CD stockings.
You can punch her about your heart's content.
Mr. Sargamor arranged the divorce, cruelty, and adultery.
Oh, but I don't like Mrs. North.
Mr. Sargamor arranged the divorce instead of youth.
Mr. Sargamor, take an action against Mr. Trisha Smith for alienating my husband's affictions.
Damage is 20,000 pounds.
Oh, Mr. Sargamor is such an invisible!
I'm afraid of Ms. Smith quite possibly.
Well, my dear old father used to stay there in the law court, so there was only one way to beat the people who had unlimited money, and that's to have no money at all.
Can't get 20,000 out of me.
Damn your old father.
That's one for you, F.I.
I play the laughies with old Mr. Smith, Mrs. Fitzpastenham.
Where there is nothing the king loses his rights.
I can bear no more of this. I shall live in utter loneliness.
And I find the right man, the mate created for me in heaven. He must be somewhere.
The man address as I wanted here, who wants me?
I want you. Come here.
Something wrong with your blood pressure, eh?
I have never felt such a pulse. It is like a slow sledgehammer.
It's my pulse, and I thought...
No, it is the will of Allah. All our pulses are part of the will of Allah.
No, look here. You know, Doc, except when we go down in this country, we don't believe in Allah.
That does not. This concern, Allah, in the least, my friend. The pulse beats still.
Slow, strong. You are a terrible woman, but I love your pulse. I have never felt anything like it before.
Her fancy that he loves her pulse.
I am a doctor. Women, as you fancied them, are nothing to me but dungals of ailments.
But the life, the pulse, is the heartbeat of Allah, saving whom there is no majesty and no might.
My pulse will never change.
This is the love I crave for. I will marry you.
Mr. Sagam will take out a special license for the moment you've got redvellous down.
It is not possible we are bound by our vows.
Why have I not passed to a mother's chest? I came to this hotel in a sky remake.
No, it's enough.
The old people whose natural homeless place have become. The old man, the old woman, was not this preying on the poverty of the poor.
Shall I, a servant of Allah, live on such games?
I have to take the world as I fight.
A wrath of Allah shall overtake those who leave this world no better than they found it.
I think Allah loves those who make money.
All the evidence is that when I say it.
I do not see it so. I see that riches are a curse. Poverty is a curse.
I don't mean the service of Allah is the righteousness, justice and happiness.
But all this talk is idle. This lady has easily fulfilled the conditions imposed by my mother.
But I have not fulfilled the conditions imposed by the lady's father.
You need not travel. I can show you how to turn 150 into 50,000.
You cannot. It is gone.
You cannot suspend it all. You are with like a mouse. There must be some of it left.
No, the penny, not the piazza.
Allah, Allah, what did you do with it?
Allah is never bothered.
On that afternoon, when you left me to earn your own living,
I called upon the merciful, the compassionate, to reveal to me whether you were not one of the strokes of his infinite humor.
Then I sat down and took up a newspaper. And behold, a paragraph headed wills and bequests.
I read a name that I cannot remember. I miss somebody of Clapham Park, 122,000 pounds.
She had never done anything but live in Clapham Park. And she left 122,000 pounds.
But what was the second name?
It was that of the teacher who changed my whole life and gave me a new soul by opening the world of science to me.
I was as assistant for four years.
He used to make his own apparatus for his experiments.
And then one day he needed a filament of metal that would resist a temperature that would melt platinum like ceiling wax.
By the patent, if it hasn't been snapped up already.
He never took out the patent. He believed that knowledge is no man's property.
And he had neither time nor money to spend in patent offices. Millions have been made out of that discovery of his wife.
He was always by people who care nothing about science and everything about money.
He left 400 pounds and a widow. That good woman would be the second mother to me,
a killing a day for her at most not even one piastra an hour.
That comes of marrying an incompetent dreamer.
The merciful, the compassionate, heard the widow's prayer.
I once cured a prime minister when he imagined himself to be ill.
I went to him and told him that it was the will of Allah that the widow should receive a civil pension.
She received it 100 pounds.
I went to the great metallurgical trust which exploits his discovery and told them that her poverty was a scandal in the face of Allah.
They were rich and generous. They made a special issue of founder's shares,
300 pounds a year to her. But all this took time.
The illness, the nurse, the funeral, the disposal of the laboratory that changed to a cheaper lodging had left her without a penny.
Between the death and the pensions, there was a gap exactly 150 pounds wide.
He who is just and exact, supplied that son through your chauffeur's hands and through mine.
Rejoiced my heart as money has never rejoiced it before.
But instead of coming to you with 50,000 pounds, I am in arreas with my bill for my bread in your hotel and I'm expecting every day to be told by your manager that this cannot go on.
I must speak with you.
You didn't do very well for yourself. We did well, very well for the widow and to escape with it.
If you won't marry you with empty pockets.
Why? 50,000 of us have been made 10 times over in that discovery.
And the doctor in putting my 150 pounds in the widow is necessary expenses, maybe said we've made a retrospective investment in that discovery and to show the greatest ability in the affair.
Has he not missed a saga more?
Unquestionably. He's settled the widow's affairs of the faction.
But I am in debt for my food.
What if it comes to an I am in debt for my food?
I got a letter this morning from my purveyor saying that I have paid nothing for two years and that if I do not send them something on account, they will be obliged to resort to the premises.
What does that mean?
Sell my furniture.
You cannot tell mine I'm afraid. I have hardly any.
You have a strict shall sell it. She is the meanest woman in England.
That is why I am also the richest.
Mr. Sargamore, my mind is made up. I will marry this doctor.
Asserting his name and make the necessary arrangement.
You take care, doctor. She is unfaithful to her husband and wanting to marry you. She flirted with me, took me down the river and made me believe I was to be Alistair's success along before ever she saw you. See what she's done to me.
She will do the same to you when the next man takes her pencil.
What have you to say to that?
You must learn to take chances in this world.
This disappointed philandra tries to frighten you with my unfaithfulness. He has never been married.
I have.
And I tell you in the very happiest marriages, not a day passes without a thousand moments of unfaithfulness.
You begin by thinking you have one husband. You find you have a dozen.
There is the creature you hate and despise and have tied to polite.
And before breakfast is over, the fools hear something nice and becomes the man you admire and love.
And between these extremes, there are a thousand degrees with a different man and woman at each of them.
A wife is all women to one man. She is everything which is devilish, the thorn in his side, the jealous turmeric, the detective dogging all his movements, the naga, the scold, the warrior.
He has only to tell her an affectionate lie.
And she becomes his comfort, his helper, at best his greatest treasure, at worst his troublesome, beloved child.
All wives are all these women in one. All husbands, all these men in one.
What do the unmarried know of this infinitely dangerous, hot, tearing life of adventure we call marriage?
Face it as you would face a dangerous operation.
Have you not performed hundreds of them?
Of a surety, there is no wit and no wisdom like that of a woman and flaring and make chosen for her by Allah.
Yet I am very well as I am. Why should I change? I shall be very happy as an old bachelor.
Can you feel my pulse every day as an old bachelor?
I have forgotten the pulse.
One, two, three. It is a resistible. It is a pulse in a hundred thousand. I love it. I cannot give it up.
You will regret it to the last day of your life.
Mr. Saggamore, you have your instructions. Gretchen-ration starlies.
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