Original subtitles

THE ENTIRE THING ON CASSETTE IN THE PHILIPPINES. THEY DID A LOT OF WORK ON THEM.

CASSETTE IN THE PHILIPPINES. THEY DID A LOT OF WORK ON THEM. THEY SPENT A COUPLE MILLION

THEY DID A LOT OF WORK ON THEM. THEY SPENT A COUPLE MILLION DOLLARS.

THEY SPENT A COUPLE MILLION DOLLARS. NOW, IT'S TRUE, THEY SHOWED THE

DOLLARS. NOW, IT'S TRUE, THEY SHOWED THE BAD SIDE OF THE FAMILY.

NOW, IT'S TRUE, THEY SHOWED THE BAD SIDE OF THE FAMILY. BUT YOU CAME OFF LOOKING REALLY

BAD SIDE OF THE FAMILY. BUT YOU CAME OFF LOOKING REALLY WELL TONIGHT.

BUT YOU CAME OFF LOOKING REALLY WELL TONIGHT. I DON'T KNOW.

WELL TONIGHT. I DON'T KNOW. YOU KNOW, IF WHAT THEY SAY IS

I DON'T KNOW. YOU KNOW, IF WHAT THEY SAY IS TRUE, THE CAMERA REALLY DOES PUT

YOU KNOW, IF WHAT THEY SAY IS TRUE, THE CAMERA REALLY DOES PUT ON 10 POUNDS, YOU KNOW?

TRUE, THE CAMERA REALLY DOES PUT ON 10 POUNDS, YOU KNOW? I DON'T LIKE THE WAY WE WERE

ON 10 POUNDS, YOU KNOW? I DON'T LIKE THE WAY WE WERE PORTRAYED, YOU KNOW?

I DON'T LIKE THE WAY WE WERE PORTRAYED, YOU KNOW? MOVIES ARE ONE THING, BUT...

PORTRAYED, YOU KNOW? MOVIES ARE ONE THING, BUT... THERE'S TOO MUCH VIOLENCE ON

MOVIES ARE ONE THING, BUT... THERE'S TOO MUCH VIOLENCE ON TELEVISION.

THERE'S TOO MUCH VIOLENCE ON TELEVISION. OH, IT'S A DIRTY BUSINESS.

TELEVISION. OH, IT'S A DIRTY BUSINESS. I WANT NO PART OF IT.

OH, IT'S A DIRTY BUSINESS. I WANT NO PART OF IT. NO MORE "GODFATHER" ON

I WANT NO PART OF IT. NO MORE "GODFATHER" ON TELEVISION!

NO MORE "GODFATHER" ON TELEVISION! THAT'S GONNA BE VERY HARD TO

TELEVISION! THAT'S GONNA BE VERY HARD TO DO.

THAT'S GONNA BE VERY HARD TO DO. THE NIELSEN RATINGS WERE AWFULLY

DO. THE NIELSEN RATINGS WERE AWFULLY HIGH.

THE NIELSEN RATINGS WERE AWFULLY HIGH. IT'S GONNA BE DIFFICULT TO GET

HIGH. IT'S GONNA BE DIFFICULT TO GET THEM TO CANCEL PARTS TWO, THREE,

IT'S GONNA BE DIFFICULT TO GET THEM TO CANCEL PARTS TWO, THREE, AND FOUR.

THEM TO CANCEL PARTS TWO, THREE, AND FOUR. IN FACT, THEY HAVE PLANS TO DO

AND FOUR. IN FACT, THEY HAVE PLANS TO DO EVEN MORE.

IN FACT, THEY HAVE PLANS TO DO EVEN MORE. WHAT PLANS?

EVEN MORE. WHAT PLANS? WELL, THEY'VE ALREADY STARTED

WHAT PLANS? WELL, THEY'VE ALREADY STARTED DEVELOPING TWO NEW SHOWS...

WELL, THEY'VE ALREADY STARTED DEVELOPING TWO NEW SHOWS... "GODFATHER KNOWS BEST" AND

DEVELOPING TWO NEW SHOWS... "GODFATHER KNOWS BEST" AND ANOTHER THING CALLED "THE

"GODFATHER KNOWS BEST" AND ANOTHER THING CALLED "THE COURTSHIP OF EDDIE'S GODFATHER."

ANOTHER THING CALLED "THE COURTSHIP OF EDDIE'S GODFATHER." HOW CAN NBC TREAT ME WITH

COURTSHIP OF EDDIE'S GODFATHER." HOW CAN NBC TREAT ME WITH SUCH DISRESPECT?

HOW CAN NBC TREAT ME WITH SUCH DISRESPECT? ["THE GODFATHER" THEME PLAYS]

SUCH DISRESPECT? ["THE GODFATHER" THEME PLAYS] AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR THEM.

["THE GODFATHER" THEME PLAYS] AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR THEM. WHEN THEY WANTED DEAN MARTIN TO

AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR THEM. WHEN THEY WANTED DEAN MARTIN TO STAR IN A SERIES, WHO GOT HIM

WHEN THEY WANTED DEAN MARTIN TO STAR IN A SERIES, WHO GOT HIM FOR THEM?

STAR IN A SERIES, WHO GOT HIM FOR THEM? I DID.

FOR THEM? I DID. AH, BUT LET'S FACE IT.

I DID. AH, BUT LET'S FACE IT. THEY NEVER WANTED MY FRIENDSHIP.

AH, BUT LET'S FACE IT. THEY NEVER WANTED MY FRIENDSHIP. IT'S OKAY. I UNDERSTAND.

THEY NEVER WANTED MY FRIENDSHIP. IT'S OKAY. I UNDERSTAND. BUT NOW THIS?

IT'S OKAY. I UNDERSTAND. BUT NOW THIS? HOW CAN THEY DO THIS TO ME?

BUT NOW THIS? HOW CAN THEY DO THIS TO ME? WE MADE NO CONTRACT.

HOW CAN THEY DO THIS TO ME? WE MADE NO CONTRACT. THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO HAVE A

WE MADE NO CONTRACT. THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO HAVE A CONTRACT.

THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO HAVE A CONTRACT. WE HAVE NO LEGAL RECOURSE.

CONTRACT. WE HAVE NO LEGAL RECOURSE. AH, LEGAL RECOURSE.

WE HAVE NO LEGAL RECOURSE. AH, LEGAL RECOURSE. LEGAL RECOURSE.

AH, LEGAL RECOURSE. LEGAL RECOURSE. WE'LL GO TO THE MATTRESSES!

LEGAL RECOURSE. WE'LL GO TO THE MATTRESSES! WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST WE DO,

WE'LL GO TO THE MATTRESSES! WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST WE DO, GODFATHER, MAKE THEM AN OFFER

WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST WE DO, GODFATHER, MAKE THEM AN OFFER THEY CAN'T PASS BY?

GODFATHER, MAKE THEM AN OFFER THEY CAN'T PASS BY? MM. SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

THEY CAN'T PASS BY? MM. SOMETHING LIKE THAT. LET'S SEE.

MM. SOMETHING LIKE THAT. LET'S SEE. WE MOVE HARD AND FAST.

LET'S SEE. WE MOVE HARD AND FAST. TOM, YOU GO TO NBC IN HOLLYWOOD.

WE MOVE HARD AND FAST. TOM, YOU GO TO NBC IN HOLLYWOOD. TAKE CLEMENZA WITH YOU.

TOM, YOU GO TO NBC IN HOLLYWOOD. TAKE CLEMENZA WITH YOU. I WANT GRIZZLY ADAMS TO WAKE UP

TAKE CLEMENZA WITH YOU. I WANT GRIZZLY ADAMS TO WAKE UP WITH A BEAR'S HEAD ON HIS

I WANT GRIZZLY ADAMS TO WAKE UP WITH A BEAR'S HEAD ON HIS PILLOW.

WITH A BEAR'S HEAD ON HIS PILLOW. THAT'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.

PILLOW. THAT'LL TAKE CARE OF IT. OKAY.

THAT'LL TAKE CARE OF IT. OKAY. HOW ABOUT HITTING

OKAY. HOW ABOUT HITTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE"?

HOW ABOUT HITTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE"? NO.

"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE"? NO. MY GRANDCHILDREN LOVE THE SHOW.

NO. MY GRANDCHILDREN LOVE THE SHOW. IT MAKES THEM LAUGH.

MY GRANDCHILDREN LOVE THE SHOW. IT MAKES THEM LAUGH. AND THERE'S NOT ENOUGH GOOD

IT MAKES THEM LAUGH. AND THERE'S NOT ENOUGH GOOD SATIRE ON TV THESE DAYS.

AND THERE'S NOT ENOUGH GOOD SATIRE ON TV THESE DAYS. BESIDES, I LOVE IT WHEN THEY

SATIRE ON TV THESE DAYS. BESIDES, I LOVE IT WHEN THEY SAY, "LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S

BESIDES, I LOVE IT WHEN THEY SAY, "LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!"

SAY, "LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!" [BAND PLAYS]

SATURDAY NIGHT!" [BAND PLAYS] Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY

[BAND PLAYS] Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."

Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE." STARRING RAY CHARLES...

WITH A SPECIAL GUEST...

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, RAY CHARLES. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

RAY CHARLES. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] OH, THANK YOU.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, LADIES AND

THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. I WANT TO SAY THAT WHEN THE

GENTLEMEN. I WANT TO SAY THAT WHEN THE PEOPLE FROM "SATURDAY NIGHT"

I WANT TO SAY THAT WHEN THE PEOPLE FROM "SATURDAY NIGHT" FIRST ASKED ME TO HOST THIS

PEOPLE FROM "SATURDAY NIGHT" FIRST ASKED ME TO HOST THIS SHOW, OF COURSE I SAID

FIRST ASKED ME TO HOST THIS SHOW, OF COURSE I SAID "ABSOLUTELY NOT."

SHOW, OF COURSE I SAID "ABSOLUTELY NOT." I KNEW THE SHOW WAS TASTELESS

"ABSOLUTELY NOT." I KNEW THE SHOW WAS TASTELESS AND OFFENSIVE, AND THERE WAS NO

I KNEW THE SHOW WAS TASTELESS AND OFFENSIVE, AND THERE WAS NO WAY I WAS GONNA LET 30 YEARS OF

AND OFFENSIVE, AND THERE WAS NO WAY I WAS GONNA LET 30 YEARS OF A CAREER GO DOWN THE DRAIN.

WAY I WAS GONNA LET 30 YEARS OF A CAREER GO DOWN THE DRAIN. I MIGHT BE BLIND, BUT I'M

A CAREER GO DOWN THE DRAIN. I MIGHT BE BLIND, BUT I'M CERTAINLY NOT STUPID.

I MIGHT BE BLIND, BUT I'M CERTAINLY NOT STUPID. BUT THEY KEPT ON ASKING ME.

CERTAINLY NOT STUPID. BUT THEY KEPT ON ASKING ME. AND THE PRODUCER WAS SAYING,

BUT THEY KEPT ON ASKING ME. AND THE PRODUCER WAS SAYING, "HEY, RAY, WE GONNA MAKE YOU

AND THE PRODUCER WAS SAYING, "HEY, RAY, WE GONNA MAKE YOU LOOK GOOD."

"HEY, RAY, WE GONNA MAKE YOU LOOK GOOD." BUT, YOU SEE, I WAS WORRIED MORE

LOOK GOOD." BUT, YOU SEE, I WAS WORRIED MORE ABOUT THE SOUND.

BUT, YOU SEE, I WAS WORRIED MORE ABOUT THE SOUND. SO, EVENTUALLY, I SAID, "LISTEN,

ABOUT THE SOUND. SO, EVENTUALLY, I SAID, "LISTEN, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.

SO, EVENTUALLY, I SAID, "LISTEN, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. I'LL DO THE SHOW, BUT THERE MUST

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. I'LL DO THE SHOW, BUT THERE MUST BE SOME PARTICULAR CONDITIONS IN

I'LL DO THE SHOW, BUT THERE MUST BE SOME PARTICULAR CONDITIONS IN ORDER FOR ME TO DO IT.

BE SOME PARTICULAR CONDITIONS IN ORDER FOR ME TO DO IT. FOR INSTANCE I'VE GOT TO HAVE MY

ORDER FOR ME TO DO IT. FOR INSTANCE I'VE GOT TO HAVE MY OWN MUSICIANS.

FOR INSTANCE I'VE GOT TO HAVE MY OWN MUSICIANS. I WANT THE RAYLETTES."

OWN MUSICIANS. I WANT THE RAYLETTES." AND THEY SAID OKAY.

I WANT THE RAYLETTES." AND THEY SAID OKAY. BUT THE LAST THING I ASKED THEM

AND THEY SAID OKAY. BUT THE LAST THING I ASKED THEM ABOUT, IT TOOK THEM A LITTLE

BUT THE LAST THING I ASKED THEM ABOUT, IT TOOK THEM A LITTLE WHILE TO COME UP WITH IT, BUT

ABOUT, IT TOOK THEM A LITTLE WHILE TO COME UP WITH IT, BUT THEY WERE EVEN ABLE TO DO THAT,

WHILE TO COME UP WITH IT, BUT THEY WERE EVEN ABLE TO DO THAT, TOO.

THEY WERE EVEN ABLE TO DO THAT, TOO. SO, THEREFORE, LADIES AND

TOO. SO, THEREFORE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET ME SAY THAT

SO, THEREFORE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET ME SAY THAT TONIGHT WE ARE PROUD TO BE

GENTLEMEN, LET ME SAY THAT TONIGHT WE ARE PROUD TO BE COMING TO YOU LIVE FROM

TONIGHT WE ARE PROUD TO BE COMING TO YOU LIVE FROM CARNEGIE HALL.

COMING TO YOU LIVE FROM CARNEGIE HALL. NOW, LISTEN, I GOT TO TELL YOU

CARNEGIE HALL. NOW, LISTEN, I GOT TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.

NOW, LISTEN, I GOT TO TELL YOU SOMETHING. YOU SEE, NOW, THEY THINK THAT I

SOMETHING. YOU SEE, NOW, THEY THINK THAT I THINK THAT THIS IS

YOU SEE, NOW, THEY THINK THAT I THINK THAT THIS IS CARNEGIE HALL.

THINK THAT THIS IS CARNEGIE HALL. [APPLAUSE]

CARNEGIE HALL. [APPLAUSE] THE JOKE IS REALLY ON THEM

[APPLAUSE] THE JOKE IS REALLY ON THEM BECAUSE, YOU SEE, I'M NOT THE

THE JOKE IS REALLY ON THEM BECAUSE, YOU SEE, I'M NOT THE REAL RAY CHARLES.

BECAUSE, YOU SEE, I'M NOT THE REAL RAY CHARLES. [LAUGHTER]

REAL RAY CHARLES. [LAUGHTER] THE REAL RAY CHARLES IS AT

[LAUGHTER] THE REAL RAY CHARLES IS AT CARNEGIE HALL.

THE REAL RAY CHARLES IS AT CARNEGIE HALL. BUT IF HE WERE HERE TONIGHT, I

CARNEGIE HALL. BUT IF HE WERE HERE TONIGHT, I AM SURE THAT HE WOULD LEAD OFF

BUT IF HE WERE HERE TONIGHT, I AM SURE THAT HE WOULD LEAD OFF THIS SHOW WITH SOMETHING LIKE

AM SURE THAT HE WOULD LEAD OFF THIS SHOW WITH SOMETHING LIKE THIS.

THIS SHOW WITH SOMETHING LIKE THIS. ONE, TWO.

THIS. ONE, TWO. [INTRO TO "I CAN SEE CLEARLY

ONE, TWO. [INTRO TO "I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW" PLAYS]

[INTRO TO "I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW" PLAYS] ♪ I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THAT THE

[NOW" PLAYS] ♪ I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THAT THE RAIN IS GONE ♪

♪ I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THAT THE RAIN IS GONE ♪ ♪ I CAN SEE ALL OBSTACLES IN MY

RAIN IS GONE ♪ ♪ I CAN SEE ALL OBSTACLES IN MY WAY ♪

♪ I CAN SEE ALL OBSTACLES IN MY WAY ♪ ♪ GONE ARE THE DARK CLOUDS THAT

WAY ♪ ♪ GONE ARE THE DARK CLOUDS THAT USED TO MAKE ME BLIND ♪

♪ GONE ARE THE DARK CLOUDS THAT USED TO MAKE ME BLIND ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT, BRIGHT ♪

USED TO MAKE ME BLIND ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT, BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ I SEE A BRIGHT, BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪

♪ OH, BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪ ♪ WELL, I SEE ♪

♪ YES, I DO ♪ ♪ WELL, I SEE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ WELL, I SEE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ I SEE A BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪

♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪ LOOKEE HERE.

♪ YES, I DO ♪ LOOKEE HERE. ♪ I THINK I CAN MAKE IT NOW THAT

LOOKEE HERE. ♪ I THINK I CAN MAKE IT NOW THAT THE RAIN IS GONE ♪

♪ I THINK I CAN MAKE IT NOW THAT THE RAIN IS GONE ♪ ♪ ALL OF THE BAD FEELINGS HAVE

THE RAIN IS GONE ♪ ♪ ALL OF THE BAD FEELINGS HAVE DISAPPEARED ♪

♪ ALL OF THE BAD FEELINGS HAVE DISAPPEARED ♪ ♪ HERE IS THE RAINBOW THAT I'VE

DISAPPEARED ♪ ♪ HERE IS THE RAINBOW THAT I'VE BEEN PRAYING FOR ♪

♪ HERE IS THE RAINBOW THAT I'VE BEEN PRAYING FOR ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT, BRIGHT ♪

BEEN PRAYING FOR ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT, BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ I SEE A BRIGHT, BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WHOA, AND ANOTHER SUNSHINY

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WHOA, AND ANOTHER SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ WHOA, AND ANOTHER SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪

DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪ ♪ WELL, I SEE ♪

♪ YES, I DO ♪ ♪ WELL, I SEE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ WELL, I SEE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT SUNSHINY

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ I SEE A BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ WELL, LOOK ALL AROUND YOU,

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ WELL, LOOK ALL AROUND YOU, THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪

♪ WELL, LOOK ALL AROUND YOU, THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪ ♪ WHY DON'T YOU LOOK STRAIGHT

THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪ ♪ WHY DON'T YOU LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD ♪

♪ WHY DON'T YOU LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD ♪ ♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE

AHEAD ♪ ♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪

♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪ [GUITAR PLAYS]

SKIES ♪ [GUITAR PLAYS] ♪ OOH-OOH ♪

[GUITAR PLAYS] ♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪

♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪

♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪

♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH-OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOOOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOOOH ♪ ♪ OOH, OOH, OOH, OOH ♪

♪ OOOOH ♪ ♪ OOH, OOH, OOH, OOH ♪ ♪ LOOK ALL AROUND YOU ♪

♪ OOH, OOH, OOH, OOH ♪ ♪ LOOK ALL AROUND YOU ♪ ♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE

♪ LOOK ALL AROUND YOU ♪ ♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪

♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪ ♪ WHY DON'T YOU LOOK STRAIGHT

SKIES ♪ ♪ WHY DON'T YOU LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD ♪

♪ WHY DON'T YOU LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD ♪ ♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE

AHEAD ♪ ♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪

♪ THERE'S NOTHING BUT BLUE SKIES ♪ ♪ WELL, ALL RIGHT ♪

SKIES ♪ ♪ WELL, ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THAT THE

♪ WELL, ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THAT THE RAIN IS GONE ♪

♪ I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW THAT THE RAIN IS GONE ♪ ♪ I CAN SEE ALL OBSTACLES IN MY

RAIN IS GONE ♪ ♪ I CAN SEE ALL OBSTACLES IN MY WAY, Y'ALL ♪

♪ I CAN SEE ALL OBSTACLES IN MY WAY, Y'ALL ♪ ♪ OHHHHH ♪

WAY, Y'ALL ♪ ♪ OHHHHH ♪ ♪ GONE ARE THE DARK CLOUDS USED

♪ OHHHHH ♪ ♪ GONE ARE THE DARK CLOUDS USED TO MAKE ME BLIND ♪

♪ GONE ARE THE DARK CLOUDS USED TO MAKE ME BLIND ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT ♪

TO MAKE ME BLIND ♪ ♪ I SEE A BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ I SEE A BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WELL, BRIGHT ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WELL, BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ WELL, BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪

♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, I DO ♪ ♪ GIRLS, I SEE A BRIGHT ♪

♪ YES, I DO ♪ ♪ GIRLS, I SEE A BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ GIRLS, I SEE A BRIGHT ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, LITTLE BRIGHT NOW ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, LITTLE BRIGHT NOW ♪ ♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ OH, LITTLE BRIGHT NOW ♪ ♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

♪ BRIGHT SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO IS LOOK

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO IS LOOK AROUND YOU ♪

♪ ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO IS LOOK AROUND YOU ♪ ♪ AND I KNOW YOU'LL SEE A

AROUND YOU ♪ ♪ AND I KNOW YOU'LL SEE A SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ AND I KNOW YOU'LL SEE A SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, YOU WILL ♪

SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YES, YOU WILL ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ YES, YOU WILL ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ AND, OH, A SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ AND, OH, A SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

♪ AND, OH, A SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪ [HIGH-PITCHED VOCALIZING]

♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪ [HIGH-PITCHED VOCALIZING] ♪ WHOA, OH ♪

[HIGH-PITCHED VOCALIZING] ♪ WHOA, OH ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ WHOA, OH ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ HAVE MERCY ♪

♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ HAVE MERCY ♪ ♪ PEOPLE, LISTEN HERE ♪

♪ HAVE MERCY ♪ ♪ PEOPLE, LISTEN HERE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ PEOPLE, LISTEN HERE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ IF YOU LOOK AROUND YOU ♪

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ IF YOU LOOK AROUND YOU ♪ ♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ IF YOU LOOK AROUND YOU ♪ ♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO IS

♪ BRIGHT, SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO IS KEEP THE FAITH ♪

♪ ALL YOU'VE GOT TO DO IS KEEP THE FAITH ♪ ♪ I KNOW YOU'LL SEE ♪

KEEP THE FAITH ♪ ♪ I KNOW YOU'LL SEE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪

♪ I KNOW YOU'LL SEE ♪ ♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WELL, YOU'LL SEE A SUNSHINY

♪ BRIGHT ♪ ♪ WELL, YOU'LL SEE A SUNSHINY DAY ♪

♪ WELL, YOU'LL SEE A SUNSHINY DAY ♪ ♪ SUNSHINY DAY ♪

DAY ♪ ♪ SUNSHINY DAY ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

♪ SUNSHINY DAY ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] [LAUGHS]

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] [LAUGHS] THANK YOU.

[LAUGHS] THANK YOU. OH, BLESS YOUR HEART.

THANK YOU. OH, BLESS YOUR HEART. BROTHER RAY APPRECIATE IT.

OH, BLESS YOUR HEART. BROTHER RAY APPRECIATE IT. THANK YOU.

BROTHER RAY APPRECIATE IT. THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

THANK YOU. THANK YOU. HA. IT'S ALL RIGHT.

THANK YOU. HA. IT'S ALL RIGHT. YOU KNOW, I'M FROM A LITTLE,

HA. IT'S ALL RIGHT. YOU KNOW, I'M FROM A LITTLE, SMALL PLACE THAT'S CALLED

YOU KNOW, I'M FROM A LITTLE, SMALL PLACE THAT'S CALLED ALBANY, GEORGIA, AND RIGHT NEXT

SMALL PLACE THAT'S CALLED ALBANY, GEORGIA, AND RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO THAT IS PLAINS, GEORGIA.

ALBANY, GEORGIA, AND RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO THAT IS PLAINS, GEORGIA. SO, YOU CAN SEE THAT I HAVE A

DOOR TO THAT IS PLAINS, GEORGIA. SO, YOU CAN SEE THAT I HAVE A SPECIAL, WARM FEELING FOR OUR

SO, YOU CAN SEE THAT I HAVE A SPECIAL, WARM FEELING FOR OUR PRESIDENT.

SPECIAL, WARM FEELING FOR OUR PRESIDENT. NOW, IT'S NOT BECAUSE WE'RE

PRESIDENT. NOW, IT'S NOT BECAUSE WE'RE NEIGHBORS.

NOW, IT'S NOT BECAUSE WE'RE NEIGHBORS. BUT, YOU SEE, AT ONE TIME, HIS

NEIGHBORS. BUT, YOU SEE, AT ONE TIME, HIS FAMILY OWNED MY GRANDFATHER.

BUT, YOU SEE, AT ONE TIME, HIS FAMILY OWNED MY GRANDFATHER. AND SO THEREFORE, JIMMY, THIS IS

FAMILY OWNED MY GRANDFATHER. AND SO THEREFORE, JIMMY, THIS IS FOR YOU.

AND SO THEREFORE, JIMMY, THIS IS FOR YOU. ♪ GEORGIA ♪

FOR YOU. ♪ GEORGIA ♪ ♪ AH, GEORGIA ♪

♪ GEORGIA ♪ ♪ AH, GEORGIA ♪ [APPLAUSE]

♪ AH, GEORGIA ♪ [APPLAUSE] ♪ THE WHOLE DAY THROUGH ♪

[APPLAUSE] ♪ THE WHOLE DAY THROUGH ♪ GOOD EVENING.

♪ THE WHOLE DAY THROUGH ♪ GOOD EVENING. THROUGHOUT MY CAMPAIGN FOR

GOOD EVENING. THROUGHOUT MY CAMPAIGN FOR PRESIDENT, I SPOKE OF THE

THROUGHOUT MY CAMPAIGN FOR PRESIDENT, I SPOKE OF THE INTELLIGENCE OF THE AMERICAN

PRESIDENT, I SPOKE OF THE INTELLIGENCE OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE.

INTELLIGENCE OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. IT WAS WITH THIS OPTIMISM THAT I

PEOPLE. IT WAS WITH THIS OPTIMISM THAT I INTRODUCED MY ENERGY PROGRAM.

IT WAS WITH THIS OPTIMISM THAT I INTRODUCED MY ENERGY PROGRAM. BUT NOW MY ENERGY PROGRAM IS IN

INTRODUCED MY ENERGY PROGRAM. BUT NOW MY ENERGY PROGRAM IS IN SEVERE TROUBLE, MAINLY BECAUSE

BUT NOW MY ENERGY PROGRAM IS IN SEVERE TROUBLE, MAINLY BECAUSE YOU THE AMERICAN PUBLIC HAVE

SEVERE TROUBLE, MAINLY BECAUSE YOU THE AMERICAN PUBLIC HAVE FAILED TO UNDERSTAND THE URGENCY

YOU THE AMERICAN PUBLIC HAVE FAILED TO UNDERSTAND THE URGENCY OF THE ENERGY CRISIS, EVEN

FAILED TO UNDERSTAND THE URGENCY OF THE ENERGY CRISIS, EVEN THOUGH I HAVE EXPLAINED IT TO

OF THE ENERGY CRISIS, EVEN THOUGH I HAVE EXPLAINED IT TO YOU MANY TIMES...

THOUGH I HAVE EXPLAINED IT TO YOU MANY TIMES... SLOWLY, CLEARLY, AND USING

YOU MANY TIMES... SLOWLY, CLEARLY, AND USING ONE-SYLLABLE WORDS...

SLOWLY, CLEARLY, AND USING ONE-SYLLABLE WORDS... WORDS LIKE "OIL," "GAS," "OIL,"

ONE-SYLLABLE WORDS... WORDS LIKE "OIL," "GAS," "OIL," "GAS."

WORDS LIKE "OIL," "GAS," "OIL," "GAS." I SAID OUR ECONOMY AND NATIONAL

"GAS." I SAID OUR ECONOMY AND NATIONAL SECURITY DEPENDED UPON A

I SAID OUR ECONOMY AND NATIONAL SECURITY DEPENDED UPON A COMPREHENSIVE ENERGY PROGRAM.

SECURITY DEPENDED UPON A COMPREHENSIVE ENERGY PROGRAM. BUT DID YOU RESPOND?

COMPREHENSIVE ENERGY PROGRAM. BUT DID YOU RESPOND? NO.

BUT DID YOU RESPOND? NO. BECAUSE YOU DID NOT, THE SENATE

NO. BECAUSE YOU DID NOT, THE SENATE HAS BLOCKED MY PROGRAM, AND I

BECAUSE YOU DID NOT, THE SENATE HAS BLOCKED MY PROGRAM, AND I HAD TO CANCEL MY TRIP TO PARIS.

HAS BLOCKED MY PROGRAM, AND I HAD TO CANCEL MY TRIP TO PARIS. ROSALYNN AND I WERE LOOKING

HAD TO CANCEL MY TRIP TO PARIS. ROSALYNN AND I WERE LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT TRIP.

ROSALYNN AND I WERE LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT TRIP. THAT'S OKAY.

FORWARD TO THAT TRIP. THAT'S OKAY. WITHOUT MY PROGRAM, WE'RE GONNA

THAT'S OKAY. WITHOUT MY PROGRAM, WE'RE GONNA HAVE HIGH INFLATION AND

WITHOUT MY PROGRAM, WE'RE GONNA HAVE HIGH INFLATION AND UNEMPLOYMENT.

HAVE HIGH INFLATION AND UNEMPLOYMENT. I PROBABLY WON'T BE ABLE TO

UNEMPLOYMENT. I PROBABLY WON'T BE ABLE TO BALANCE THE BUDGET LIKE I

I PROBABLY WON'T BE ABLE TO BALANCE THE BUDGET LIKE I PROMISED.

BALANCE THE BUDGET LIKE I PROMISED. I PROBABLY WON'T GET RE-ELECTED.

PROMISED. I PROBABLY WON'T GET RE-ELECTED. EVERYTHING'S JUST GOING DOWN THE

I PROBABLY WON'T GET RE-ELECTED. EVERYTHING'S JUST GOING DOWN THE TOILET.

EVERYTHING'S JUST GOING DOWN THE TOILET. AND THEN IN 1981 OR 1982 OR

TOILET. AND THEN IN 1981 OR 1982 OR 1983, WHEN SOMEBODY ELSE IS

AND THEN IN 1981 OR 1982 OR 1983, WHEN SOMEBODY ELSE IS PRESIDENT AND, SUDDENLY, OUR

1983, WHEN SOMEBODY ELSE IS PRESIDENT AND, SUDDENLY, OUR ENERGY RUNS OUT, Y'ALL ARE GONNA

PRESIDENT AND, SUDDENLY, OUR ENERGY RUNS OUT, Y'ALL ARE GONNA COME UP TO ME AND SAY, "JIMMY,

ENERGY RUNS OUT, Y'ALL ARE GONNA COME UP TO ME AND SAY, "JIMMY, YOU WERE RIGHT.

COME UP TO ME AND SAY, "JIMMY, YOU WERE RIGHT. WE SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO YOU.

YOU WERE RIGHT. WE SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO YOU. WE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED GUZZLING

WE SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO YOU. WE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED GUZZLING GAS.

WE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED GUZZLING GAS. WE SHOULD HAVE MADE A TRANSITION

GAS. WE SHOULD HAVE MADE A TRANSITION TO COAL.

WE SHOULD HAVE MADE A TRANSITION TO COAL. WON'T YOU HELP US NOW, JIMMY,

TO COAL. WON'T YOU HELP US NOW, JIMMY, AND TELL US WHAT TO DO?"

WON'T YOU HELP US NOW, JIMMY, AND TELL US WHAT TO DO?" AND YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA SAY?

AND TELL US WHAT TO DO?" AND YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA SAY? "HONK OFF, BOZOS.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA SAY? "HONK OFF, BOZOS. YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE IN 1977, AND

"HONK OFF, BOZOS. YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE IN 1977, AND YOU BLEW IT."

YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE IN 1977, AND YOU BLEW IT." THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT.

YOU BLEW IT." THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT. ♪ OH, SWEET SONG ♪

THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT. ♪ OH, SWEET SONG ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

♪ OH, SWEET SONG ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ KEEPS GEORGIA ON MY MIND ♪

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ KEEPS GEORGIA ON MY MIND ♪ YOU KNOW, I WANT TO SAY THAT

♪ KEEPS GEORGIA ON MY MIND ♪ YOU KNOW, I WANT TO SAY THAT I'VE BEEN A MUSIC LOVER ALL MY

YOU KNOW, I WANT TO SAY THAT I'VE BEEN A MUSIC LOVER ALL MY LIFE, SO I CAN APPRECIATE THE

I'VE BEEN A MUSIC LOVER ALL MY LIFE, SO I CAN APPRECIATE THE SOUND OF GREAT AND UNIQUE

LIFE, SO I CAN APPRECIATE THE SOUND OF GREAT AND UNIQUE TALENT, LIKE THE VOICE OF MY

SOUND OF GREAT AND UNIQUE TALENT, LIKE THE VOICE OF MY LADY, MISS ELLA FITZGERALD.

TALENT, LIKE THE VOICE OF MY LADY, MISS ELLA FITZGERALD. HI.

LADY, MISS ELLA FITZGERALD. HI. ALL RIGHT.

HI. ALL RIGHT. HOW ARE YOU TODAY, ELLA?

ALL RIGHT. HOW ARE YOU TODAY, ELLA? I'M FINE, RAY.

HOW ARE YOU TODAY, ELLA? I'M FINE, RAY. WELL, NOW, WOULD YOU LIKE TO

I'M FINE, RAY. WELL, NOW, WOULD YOU LIKE TO SING FOR US, BABY?

WELL, NOW, WOULD YOU LIKE TO SING FOR US, BABY? OF COURSE.

SING FOR US, BABY? OF COURSE. [SCATTING]

[GLASS SHATTERS] [LAUGHS] OH, THAT'S GREAT, ELLA.

[LAUGHS] OH, THAT'S GREAT, ELLA. YOU KNOW, HAVING BEEN IN THE

OH, THAT'S GREAT, ELLA. YOU KNOW, HAVING BEEN IN THE RECORDING INDUSTRY MOST OF MY

YOU KNOW, HAVING BEEN IN THE RECORDING INDUSTRY MOST OF MY LIFE, I ALSO APPRECIATE THE

RECORDING INDUSTRY MOST OF MY LIFE, I ALSO APPRECIATE THE REPRODUCTION OF SOUND THAT IS SO

LIFE, I ALSO APPRECIATE THE REPRODUCTION OF SOUND THAT IS SO PRECISE THAT YOU CAN'T TELL THE

REPRODUCTION OF SOUND THAT IS SO PRECISE THAT YOU CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE RECORDING

PRECISE THAT YOU CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE RECORDING AND THE SINGER'S VOICE, THE KIND

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE RECORDING AND THE SINGER'S VOICE, THE KIND OF PRECISION THAT'S CAPTURED ON

AND THE SINGER'S VOICE, THE KIND OF PRECISION THAT'S CAPTURED ON MAMOREX TAPE.

OF PRECISION THAT'S CAPTURED ON MAMOREX TAPE. NOW, ELLA IS GONNA DO THIS THING

MAMOREX TAPE. NOW, ELLA IS GONNA DO THIS THING ONCE AGAIN.

NOW, ELLA IS GONNA DO THIS THING ONCE AGAIN. AND, THIS TIME, I'M NOT GONNA

ONCE AGAIN. AND, THIS TIME, I'M NOT GONNA LOOK TO SEE IF SHE'S SINGING OR

AND, THIS TIME, I'M NOT GONNA LOOK TO SEE IF SHE'S SINGING OR IF IT'S THE TAPE OF HER VOICE.

LOOK TO SEE IF SHE'S SINGING OR IF IT'S THE TAPE OF HER VOICE. ALL RIGHT?

IF IT'S THE TAPE OF HER VOICE. ALL RIGHT? ELLA, GO AHEAD.

ALL RIGHT? ELLA, GO AHEAD. IT'LL BE ALONG SOON.

ELLA, GO AHEAD. IT'LL BE ALONG SOON. [SCATTING]

IT'LL BE ALONG SOON. [SCATTING] [GLASS SHATTERS]

[SCATTING] [GLASS SHATTERS] WELL, NOW, WAIT A MINUTE,

[GLASS SHATTERS] WELL, NOW, WAIT A MINUTE, ELLA.

WELL, NOW, WAIT A MINUTE, ELLA. I GOT TO SAY.

ELLA. I GOT TO SAY. I GOT TO SAY.

I GOT TO SAY. I GOT TO SAY. I GOT TO SAY SOMETHING.

I GOT TO SAY. I GOT TO SAY SOMETHING. YOU KNOW, I REALLY THINK THAT...

I GOT TO SAY SOMETHING. YOU KNOW, I REALLY THINK THAT... I REALLY THINK THAT'S

YOU KNOW, I REALLY THINK THAT... I REALLY THINK THAT'S REMARKABLE.

I REALLY THINK THAT'S REMARKABLE. I COULD SEE YOU.

REMARKABLE. I COULD SEE YOU. YOU BROKE IT AGAIN.

I COULD SEE YOU. YOU BROKE IT AGAIN. NOW, JUST BETWEEN ME AND YOU,

YOU BROKE IT AGAIN. NOW, JUST BETWEEN ME AND YOU, TELL ME, WAS THAT YOU OR THE

NOW, JUST BETWEEN ME AND YOU, TELL ME, WAS THAT YOU OR THE TAPE?

TELL ME, WAS THAT YOU OR THE TAPE? UH, THE TAPE, RAY.

TAPE? UH, THE TAPE, RAY. WELL, YOU SURE COULD HAVE

UH, THE TAPE, RAY. WELL, YOU SURE COULD HAVE FOOLED ME.

WELL, YOU SURE COULD HAVE FOOLED ME. I HAVEN'T EVER BEEN SUSPECTING

FOOLED ME. I HAVEN'T EVER BEEN SUSPECTING OF YOU WITH THAT, MY DEAR.

I HAVEN'T EVER BEEN SUSPECTING OF YOU WITH THAT, MY DEAR. I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING.

OF YOU WITH THAT, MY DEAR. I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING. I'M WONDERING NOW IS WHETHER OR

I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING. I'M WONDERING NOW IS WHETHER OR NOT MAMOREX IS GOING TO PAY FOR

I'M WONDERING NOW IS WHETHER OR NOT MAMOREX IS GOING TO PAY FOR MY GLASSES.

NOT MAMOREX IS GOING TO PAY FOR MY GLASSES. [APPLAUSE]

Announcer: AND NOW ANOTHER EPISODE OF "THE DOODY GIRLS," STARRING DEBBIE AND DOTTY DOODY.

EPISODE OF "THE DOODY GIRLS," STARRING DEBBIE AND DOTTY DOODY. WELL, DOTTY, I'M ALL READY TO

STARRING DEBBIE AND DOTTY DOODY. WELL, DOTTY, I'M ALL READY TO GO.

WELL, DOTTY, I'M ALL READY TO GO. OH, DEBBIE, I KNOW TONIGHT

GO. OH, DEBBIE, I KNOW TONIGHT WILL BE THE BEST THING FOR YOU.

OH, DEBBIE, I KNOW TONIGHT WILL BE THE BEST THING FOR YOU. WELL, I JUST DON'T FEEL RIGHT

WILL BE THE BEST THING FOR YOU. WELL, I JUST DON'T FEEL RIGHT ABOUT GOING OUT ON THIS DATE.

WELL, I JUST DON'T FEEL RIGHT ABOUT GOING OUT ON THIS DATE. I MEAN, I'M STILL IN MOURNING.

ABOUT GOING OUT ON THIS DATE. I MEAN, I'M STILL IN MOURNING. OH, DEBBIE, IT'S BEEN A YEAR

I MEAN, I'M STILL IN MOURNING. OH, DEBBIE, IT'S BEEN A YEAR SINCE HOWDY DIED.

OH, DEBBIE, IT'S BEEN A YEAR SINCE HOWDY DIED. YOU'VE GOT TO GO ON.

SINCE HOWDY DIED. YOU'VE GOT TO GO ON. I MEAN, HOWDY WOULD HAVE WANTED

YOU'VE GOT TO GO ON. I MEAN, HOWDY WOULD HAVE WANTED YOU TO.

I MEAN, HOWDY WOULD HAVE WANTED YOU TO. YOU KNOW, YOU REMEMBER HIS LAST

YOU TO. YOU KNOW, YOU REMEMBER HIS LAST WORDS, DON'T YOU?

YOU KNOW, YOU REMEMBER HIS LAST WORDS, DON'T YOU? OH, I'LL NEVER FORGET.

WORDS, DON'T YOU? OH, I'LL NEVER FORGET. HE WAS ON HIS DEATHBED.

OH, I'LL NEVER FORGET. HE WAS ON HIS DEATHBED. AND HE LOOKED UP AT ME WITH

HE WAS ON HIS DEATHBED. AND HE LOOKED UP AT ME WITH TEARS IN HIS EYES.

AND HE LOOKED UP AT ME WITH TEARS IN HIS EYES. AND HE SAID, "HEY, DEBBIE, WHAT

TEARS IN HIS EYES. AND HE SAID, "HEY, DEBBIE, WHAT TIME IS IT?"

AND HE SAID, "HEY, DEBBIE, WHAT TIME IS IT?" AND I SAID, "IT'S HOWDY DOODY

TIME IS IT?" AND I SAID, "IT'S HOWDY DOODY TIME!"

AND I SAID, "IT'S HOWDY DOODY TIME!" AND HE SAID, "NOT ANYMORE."

TIME!" AND HE SAID, "NOT ANYMORE." [CRIES]

AND HE SAID, "NOT ANYMORE." [CRIES] SIT DOWN, DEBBIE.

[CRIES] SIT DOWN, DEBBIE. I WANT TO TALK TO YOU.

NOW... NOW, LOOK. YOU'VE LOST A HUSBAND. I'VE LOST A BROTHER.

YOU'VE LOST A HUSBAND. I'VE LOST A BROTHER. BUT WE CAN'T MOURN FOREVER.

I'VE LOST A BROTHER. BUT WE CAN'T MOURN FOREVER. OH, MAYBE IT'S JUST THE WAY

BUT WE CAN'T MOURN FOREVER. OH, MAYBE IT'S JUST THE WAY HE DIED... OF STRING CANCER.

OH, MAYBE IT'S JUST THE WAY HE DIED... OF STRING CANCER. LOOK, YOU'VE GOT TO FORGET.

HE DIED... OF STRING CANCER. LOOK, YOU'VE GOT TO FORGET. AND DATING WILL BE THE BEST

LOOK, YOU'VE GOT TO FORGET. AND DATING WILL BE THE BEST THING FOR YOU.

AND DATING WILL BE THE BEST THING FOR YOU. YOU'LL MEET PEOPLE.

THING FOR YOU. YOU'LL MEET PEOPLE. YOU'LL GO OUT.

YOU'LL MEET PEOPLE. YOU'LL GO OUT. YOU'LL HAVE A GOOD TIME, GET

YOU'LL GO OUT. YOU'LL HAVE A GOOD TIME, GET YOUR MIND OFF THINGS.

YOU'LL HAVE A GOOD TIME, GET YOUR MIND OFF THINGS. OH, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

YOUR MIND OFF THINGS. OH, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. BUT I MISS HIM SO!

OH, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. BUT I MISS HIM SO! [CRYING]

BUT I MISS HIM SO! [CRYING] OH.

[CRYING] OH. HOWDY.

OH. HOWDY. I KISS YOUR ASHES.

HOWDY. I KISS YOUR ASHES. DEBBIE, I THINK I SHOULD FIX

I KISS YOUR ASHES. DEBBIE, I THINK I SHOULD FIX US A DRINK TO CELEBRATE THE NEW

DEBBIE, I THINK I SHOULD FIX US A DRINK TO CELEBRATE THE NEW BEGINNING OF YOUR LIFE.

US A DRINK TO CELEBRATE THE NEW BEGINNING OF YOUR LIFE. OH, YES, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO

BEGINNING OF YOUR LIFE. OH, YES, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO DO IT QUICKLY 'CAUSE MY DATE

OH, YES, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO DO IT QUICKLY 'CAUSE MY DATE WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE.

DO IT QUICKLY 'CAUSE MY DATE WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE. OH, REALLY? ALREADY?

WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE. OH, REALLY? ALREADY? WHAT TIME IS IT?

OH, REALLY? ALREADY? WHAT TIME IS IT? IT'S...

WHAT TIME IS IT? IT'S... [BOTH CRYING]

IT'S... [BOTH CRYING] THERE, THERE.

[BOTH CRYING] THERE, THERE. THIS WILL MAKE US FEEL BETTER.

THERE, THERE. THIS WILL MAKE US FEEL BETTER. OH, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

THIS WILL MAKE US FEEL BETTER. OH, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. THANKS.

OH, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT. THANKS. CHEERS!

THANKS. CHEERS! [DOORBELL RINGS]

CHEERS! [DOORBELL RINGS] OH.

[DOORBELL RINGS] OH. COME IN.

OH. COME IN. HI, DEBBIE.

COME IN. HI, DEBBIE. HI, SKIP.

HI, DEBBIE. HI, SKIP. THIS IS, UH, DOTTY.

HI, SKIP. THIS IS, UH, DOTTY. HELLO.

THIS IS, UH, DOTTY. HELLO. HELLO.

HELLO. HELLO. THIS IS FOR YOU.

HELLO. THIS IS FOR YOU. OH, IT'S LOVELY.

THIS IS FOR YOU. OH, IT'S LOVELY. THIS SHOULD GO IN A VASE.

OH, IT'S LOVELY. THIS SHOULD GO IN A VASE. HEY, YOU KIDS, YOU SHOULD HURRY

THIS SHOULD GO IN A VASE. HEY, YOU KIDS, YOU SHOULD HURRY UP IF YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS

HEY, YOU KIDS, YOU SHOULD HURRY UP IF YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS THAT MOVIE.

UP IF YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS THAT MOVIE. IT'S GETTING LATE.

THAT MOVIE. IT'S GETTING LATE. REALLY?

IT'S GETTING LATE. REALLY? WHAT TIME IS IT?

REALLY? WHAT TIME IS IT? IT'S...

WHAT TIME IS IT? IT'S... [BOTH CRYING]

IT'S... [BOTH CRYING] TUNE IN NEXT WEEK FOR ANOTHER

[BOTH CRYING] TUNE IN NEXT WEEK FOR ANOTHER EPISODE OF "THE DOODY GIRLS."

♪ ...DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪

NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

NO MORE ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪ HELLO, EVERYBODY.

NO MORE ♪ HELLO, EVERYBODY. WELCOME TO "TOMORROW."

HELLO, EVERYBODY. WELCOME TO "TOMORROW." AS MANY OF YOU KNOW, WE'RE DOING

WELCOME TO "TOMORROW." AS MANY OF YOU KNOW, WE'RE DOING THE SHOW FROM NEW YORK CITY.

AS MANY OF YOU KNOW, WE'RE DOING THE SHOW FROM NEW YORK CITY. IT'S GREAT TO BE BACK IN THE

THE SHOW FROM NEW YORK CITY. IT'S GREAT TO BE BACK IN THE CITY OF NEW YORK... NOT NBC

IT'S GREAT TO BE BACK IN THE CITY OF NEW YORK... NOT NBC NEW YORK BECAUSE WE REALLY GOT

CITY OF NEW YORK... NOT NBC NEW YORK BECAUSE WE REALLY GOT SHORTCHANGED ON OFFICE SPACE,

NEW YORK BECAUSE WE REALLY GOT SHORTCHANGED ON OFFICE SPACE, BUT I WON'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT

SHORTCHANGED ON OFFICE SPACE, BUT I WON'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW.

BUT I WON'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW. I DID SOMETHING TODAY, THOUGH,

THAT RIGHT NOW. I DID SOMETHING TODAY, THOUGH, THAT I COULD NEVER HAVE DONE IN

I DID SOMETHING TODAY, THOUGH, THAT I COULD NEVER HAVE DONE IN LOS ANGELES.

THAT I COULD NEVER HAVE DONE IN LOS ANGELES. I BOUGHT A PRETZEL FROM A GUY

LOS ANGELES. I BOUGHT A PRETZEL FROM A GUY RIGHT OUT ON THE STREET.

I BOUGHT A PRETZEL FROM A GUY RIGHT OUT ON THE STREET. WHEN I SAY "PRETZEL," MOST OF

RIGHT OUT ON THE STREET. WHEN I SAY "PRETZEL," MOST OF YOU THINK I MEAN THE THIN

WHEN I SAY "PRETZEL," MOST OF YOU THINK I MEAN THE THIN PRETZELS THAT YOU GET IN THE

YOU THINK I MEAN THE THIN PRETZELS THAT YOU GET IN THE SUPERMARKET.

PRETZELS THAT YOU GET IN THE SUPERMARKET. HOWEVER, ANYBODY WHO'S BEEN TO

SUPERMARKET. HOWEVER, ANYBODY WHO'S BEEN TO NEW YORK KNOWS THE PRETZELS I

HOWEVER, ANYBODY WHO'S BEEN TO NEW YORK KNOWS THE PRETZELS I MEAN... THE BIG, FAT, DELICIOUS

NEW YORK KNOWS THE PRETZELS I MEAN... THE BIG, FAT, DELICIOUS NEW YORK STREET PRETZELS.

MEAN... THE BIG, FAT, DELICIOUS NEW YORK STREET PRETZELS. AND NOW MY STAGE MANAGER,

NEW YORK STREET PRETZELS. AND NOW MY STAGE MANAGER, SHELLY SCHWARTZ, IS MAD AT ME

AND NOW MY STAGE MANAGER, SHELLY SCHWARTZ, IS MAD AT ME BECAUSE I DIDN'T BRING HIM ONE.

SHELLY SCHWARTZ, IS MAD AT ME BECAUSE I DIDN'T BRING HIM ONE. AND, AS EVERYBODY KNOWS, WELL,

BECAUSE I DIDN'T BRING HIM ONE. AND, AS EVERYBODY KNOWS, WELL, HE'S A BIG FELLA, AND HE LOVES A

AND, AS EVERYBODY KNOWS, WELL, HE'S A BIG FELLA, AND HE LOVES A GOOD PRETZEL NOW AND AGAIN.

HE'S A BIG FELLA, AND HE LOVES A GOOD PRETZEL NOW AND AGAIN. THAT'S NEITHER HERE NOR THERE.

GOOD PRETZEL NOW AND AGAIN. THAT'S NEITHER HERE NOR THERE. NEXT TIME, SHELLY, I PROMISE.

THAT'S NEITHER HERE NOR THERE. NEXT TIME, SHELLY, I PROMISE. THE MUSIC WE HEARD AT THE TOP OF

NEXT TIME, SHELLY, I PROMISE. THE MUSIC WE HEARD AT THE TOP OF THE SHOW WAS, OF COURSE,

THE MUSIC WE HEARD AT THE TOP OF THE SHOW WAS, OF COURSE, "HIT THE ROAD JACK" AS SUNG BY

THE SHOW WAS, OF COURSE, "HIT THE ROAD JACK" AS SUNG BY THE MAN WHO MADE IT A BIG HIT,

"HIT THE ROAD JACK" AS SUNG BY THE MAN WHO MADE IT A BIG HIT, MY GUEST TONIGHT ON "TOMORROW,"

THE MAN WHO MADE IT A BIG HIT, MY GUEST TONIGHT ON "TOMORROW," MR. RAY CHARLES.

MY GUEST TONIGHT ON "TOMORROW," MR. RAY CHARLES. RAY, YOU'RE PROBABLY THE MOST

MR. RAY CHARLES. RAY, YOU'RE PROBABLY THE MOST POPULAR RHYTHM-AND-BLUES ARTIST

RAY, YOU'RE PROBABLY THE MOST POPULAR RHYTHM-AND-BLUES ARTIST IN AMERICAN HISTORY.

POPULAR RHYTHM-AND-BLUES ARTIST IN AMERICAN HISTORY. I GUESS MY FIRST QUESTION TO

IN AMERICAN HISTORY. I GUESS MY FIRST QUESTION TO YOU, SIR, WOULD BE, WHY SINGING?

I GUESS MY FIRST QUESTION TO YOU, SIR, WOULD BE, WHY SINGING? WHY NOT RAY CHARLES THE

YOU, SIR, WOULD BE, WHY SINGING? WHY NOT RAY CHARLES THE WATCHMAKER OR RAY CHARLES THE

WHY NOT RAY CHARLES THE WATCHMAKER OR RAY CHARLES THE LAWYER?

WATCHMAKER OR RAY CHARLES THE LAWYER? WHY RAY CHARLES THE SINGER?

LAWYER? WHY RAY CHARLES THE SINGER? TOM, YOU'RE THE FIRST PERSON

WHY RAY CHARLES THE SINGER? TOM, YOU'RE THE FIRST PERSON TO ASK ME THAT QUESTION EVER.

TOM, YOU'RE THE FIRST PERSON TO ASK ME THAT QUESTION EVER. I SUPPOSE I STARTED SINGING

TO ASK ME THAT QUESTION EVER. I SUPPOSE I STARTED SINGING BECAUSE I WANTED TO EXPRESS WHAT

I SUPPOSE I STARTED SINGING BECAUSE I WANTED TO EXPRESS WHAT I WAS FEELING IN MY SOUL.

BECAUSE I WANTED TO EXPRESS WHAT I WAS FEELING IN MY SOUL. AND I FELT THE BLUES, SO I

I WAS FEELING IN MY SOUL. AND I FELT THE BLUES, SO I NEEDED TO SING THE BLUES.

AND I FELT THE BLUES, SO I NEEDED TO SING THE BLUES. ALL RIGHT, SIR, FAIR ENOUGH.

NEEDED TO SING THE BLUES. ALL RIGHT, SIR, FAIR ENOUGH. MY NEXT QUESTION TO YOU, SIR,

ALL RIGHT, SIR, FAIR ENOUGH. MY NEXT QUESTION TO YOU, SIR, WOULD BE, WHAT THE HECK ARE THE

MY NEXT QUESTION TO YOU, SIR, WOULD BE, WHAT THE HECK ARE THE BLUES AND WHO GETS THEM?

WOULD BE, WHAT THE HECK ARE THE BLUES AND WHO GETS THEM? WELL, UH, YOU SEE, THE BLUES

BLUES AND WHO GETS THEM? WELL, UH, YOU SEE, THE BLUES IS A PART OF LIFE, YOU KNOW.

WELL, UH, YOU SEE, THE BLUES IS A PART OF LIFE, YOU KNOW. YOU LOSE YOUR JOB, YOUR WOMAN

IS A PART OF LIFE, YOU KNOW. YOU LOSE YOUR JOB, YOUR WOMAN MESSES AROUND WITH ANOTHER MAN,

YOU LOSE YOUR JOB, YOUR WOMAN MESSES AROUND WITH ANOTHER MAN, OR A WOMAN LOSES HER MAN 'CAUSE

MESSES AROUND WITH ANOTHER MAN, OR A WOMAN LOSES HER MAN 'CAUSE HE'S DOING TIME IN SOME PRISON.

OR A WOMAN LOSES HER MAN 'CAUSE HE'S DOING TIME IN SOME PRISON. YOU KNOW, ALL OF THESE KINDS OF

HE'S DOING TIME IN SOME PRISON. YOU KNOW, ALL OF THESE KINDS OF THINGS COULD GIVE YOU THE BLUES.

YOU KNOW, ALL OF THESE KINDS OF THINGS COULD GIVE YOU THE BLUES. FINE, SIR, OKAY.

THINGS COULD GIVE YOU THE BLUES. FINE, SIR, OKAY. GIVEN THAT, LET'S SAY I GO DOWN

FINE, SIR, OKAY. GIVEN THAT, LET'S SAY I GO DOWN TO THE RED-DIRT COUNTRY IN

GIVEN THAT, LET'S SAY I GO DOWN TO THE RED-DIRT COUNTRY IN MISSISSIPPI AND I BECOME A BLACK

TO THE RED-DIRT COUNTRY IN MISSISSIPPI AND I BECOME A BLACK SHARECROPPER.

MISSISSIPPI AND I BECOME A BLACK SHARECROPPER. I GET ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED

SHARECROPPER. I GET ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH, SAY, LIZA, AND SHE STARTS

I GET ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH, SAY, LIZA, AND SHE STARTS TAKING UP WITH BIG SAM, THE

WITH, SAY, LIZA, AND SHE STARTS TAKING UP WITH BIG SAM, THE PLANTATION FOREMAN.

TAKING UP WITH BIG SAM, THE PLANTATION FOREMAN. NOW, I GO TO A BAR WHERE THEY'RE

PLANTATION FOREMAN. NOW, I GO TO A BAR WHERE THEY'RE DRINKING, AND I SHOOT THEM BOTH

NOW, I GO TO A BAR WHERE THEY'RE DRINKING, AND I SHOOT THEM BOTH DEAD.

DRINKING, AND I SHOOT THEM BOTH DEAD. THERE ARE WITNESSES AND I GO TO

DEAD. THERE ARE WITNESSES AND I GO TO PRISON.

THERE ARE WITNESSES AND I GO TO PRISON. MY QUESTION IS, SIR, WOULD I GET

PRISON. MY QUESTION IS, SIR, WOULD I GET THE BLUES?

MY QUESTION IS, SIR, WOULD I GET THE BLUES? I DON'T KNOW.

THE BLUES? I DON'T KNOW. BUT UNDER THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES,

I DON'T KNOW. BUT UNDER THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES, MOST PEOPLE WOULD.

BUT UNDER THOSE CIRCUMSTANCES, MOST PEOPLE WOULD. HOWEVER, YOU MIGHT BE THE

MOST PEOPLE WOULD. HOWEVER, YOU MIGHT BE THE EXCEPTION.

HOWEVER, YOU MIGHT BE THE EXCEPTION. THAT'S A FAIR ANSWER TO MY

EXCEPTION. THAT'S A FAIR ANSWER TO MY QUESTION, THANK YOU.

THAT'S A FAIR ANSWER TO MY QUESTION, THANK YOU. RAY, YOU STARTED YOUR CAREER AT

QUESTION, THANK YOU. RAY, YOU STARTED YOUR CAREER AT A DIFFICULT TIME.

RAY, YOU STARTED YOUR CAREER AT A DIFFICULT TIME. IN THE LATE '40s, THE MUSIC

A DIFFICULT TIME. IN THE LATE '40s, THE MUSIC INDUSTRY WAS DOMINATED BY

IN THE LATE '40s, THE MUSIC INDUSTRY WAS DOMINATED BY WHITES.

INDUSTRY WAS DOMINATED BY WHITES. MOST OF IT WAS OWNED BY THAT

WHITES. MOST OF IT WAS OWNED BY THAT KU KLUX KLAN, AND I DON'T THINK

MOST OF IT WAS OWNED BY THAT KU KLUX KLAN, AND I DON'T THINK THERE SHOULD BE ANY SECRET ABOUT

KU KLUX KLAN, AND I DON'T THINK THERE SHOULD BE ANY SECRET ABOUT THAT IN 1977.

THERE SHOULD BE ANY SECRET ABOUT THAT IN 1977. SIR, MY QUESTION IS, WHAT ABOUT

THAT IN 1977. SIR, MY QUESTION IS, WHAT ABOUT GROUPIES?

SIR, MY QUESTION IS, WHAT ABOUT GROUPIES? COME ON, NOW, TOM.

GROUPIES? COME ON, NOW, TOM. YOU'RE A BIG TELEVISION STAR AND

COME ON, NOW, TOM. YOU'RE A BIG TELEVISION STAR AND YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE A

YOU'RE A BIG TELEVISION STAR AND YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE A CELEBRITY.

YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE A CELEBRITY. YOU KNOW, WOMEN, YOU KNOW, JUST

CELEBRITY. YOU KNOW, WOMEN, YOU KNOW, JUST COMING AROUND YOU ALL THE TIME,

YOU KNOW, WOMEN, YOU KNOW, JUST COMING AROUND YOU ALL THE TIME, YOU KNOW, AND THEN YOU GOT THOSE

COMING AROUND YOU ALL THE TIME, YOU KNOW, AND THEN YOU GOT THOSE SEXY NOTES AND LETTERS FROM

YOU KNOW, AND THEN YOU GOT THOSE SEXY NOTES AND LETTERS FROM YOUNG GIRLS.

SEXY NOTES AND LETTERS FROM YOUNG GIRLS. I GOT TO TELL YOU.

YOUNG GIRLS. I GOT TO TELL YOU. EVERYBODY IN THIS BUSINESS HAS

I GOT TO TELL YOU. EVERYBODY IN THIS BUSINESS HAS THEIR GROUPIES.

EVERYBODY IN THIS BUSINESS HAS THEIR GROUPIES. I HAVE MY GROUPIES, AND I'M SURE

THEIR GROUPIES. I HAVE MY GROUPIES, AND I'M SURE YOU'VE GOT YOURS.

I HAVE MY GROUPIES, AND I'M SURE YOU'VE GOT YOURS. [LAUGHS]

YOU'VE GOT YOURS. [LAUGHS] RAY, WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT IF I

[LAUGHS] RAY, WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT IF I TOLD YOU I DON'T HAVE ANY

RAY, WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT IF I TOLD YOU I DON'T HAVE ANY GROUPIES?

TOLD YOU I DON'T HAVE ANY GROUPIES? [LAUGHS]

GROUPIES? [LAUGHS] OR AT LEAST NONE THAT I KNOW OF,

[LAUGHS] OR AT LEAST NONE THAT I KNOW OF, ANYWAY.

OR AT LEAST NONE THAT I KNOW OF, ANYWAY. NOW, THERE'S SOMETHING HERE

ANYWAY. NOW, THERE'S SOMETHING HERE WHICH WE HAVEN'T DISCUSSED, AND,

NOW, THERE'S SOMETHING HERE WHICH WE HAVEN'T DISCUSSED, AND, QUITE FRANKLY, SIR, I THINK WE

WHICH WE HAVEN'T DISCUSSED, AND, QUITE FRANKLY, SIR, I THINK WE SHOULD TOUCH ON IT.

QUITE FRANKLY, SIR, I THINK WE SHOULD TOUCH ON IT. THE FACT IS, SIR, YOU'RE

SHOULD TOUCH ON IT. THE FACT IS, SIR, YOU'RE BLIND... OR LET'S SAY YOU'RE A

THE FACT IS, SIR, YOU'RE BLIND... OR LET'S SAY YOU'RE A SIGHTLESS PERSON.

BLIND... OR LET'S SAY YOU'RE A SIGHTLESS PERSON. I REMEMBER A MOVIE WITH

SIGHTLESS PERSON. I REMEMBER A MOVIE WITH PATTY DUKE AND ANNE BANCROFT.

I REMEMBER A MOVIE WITH PATTY DUKE AND ANNE BANCROFT. IT WAS CALLED "THE MIRACLE

PATTY DUKE AND ANNE BANCROFT. IT WAS CALLED "THE MIRACLE WORKER."

IT WAS CALLED "THE MIRACLE WORKER." IT WAS THE STORY OF A BLIND,

WORKER." IT WAS THE STORY OF A BLIND, DEAF, AND MUTE GIRL.

IT WAS THE STORY OF A BLIND, DEAF, AND MUTE GIRL. I CAN'T RECALL HER NAME RIGHT

DEAF, AND MUTE GIRL. I CAN'T RECALL HER NAME RIGHT NOW, BUT IT'LL COME TO ME.

I CAN'T RECALL HER NAME RIGHT NOW, BUT IT'LL COME TO ME. ANYWAY, THEY TAUGHT HER TO READ

NOW, BUT IT'LL COME TO ME. ANYWAY, THEY TAUGHT HER TO READ AND COMMUNICATE IN THAT MOVIE.

ANYWAY, THEY TAUGHT HER TO READ AND COMMUNICATE IN THAT MOVIE. IT WAS A TOUCHING STORY, AND,

AND COMMUNICATE IN THAT MOVIE. IT WAS A TOUCHING STORY, AND, FOR MY MONEY, IT WAS ONE OF THE

IT WAS A TOUCHING STORY, AND, FOR MY MONEY, IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST MOVIES I EVER SAW.

FOR MY MONEY, IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST MOVIES I EVER SAW. I NEVER CRY AT THE MOVIES, BUT

BEST MOVIES I EVER SAW. I NEVER CRY AT THE MOVIES, BUT THIS ONE HAD ME CRYING.

I NEVER CRY AT THE MOVIES, BUT THIS ONE HAD ME CRYING. IT WAS GREAT.

THIS ONE HAD ME CRYING. IT WAS GREAT. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THAT

IT WAS GREAT. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THAT MOVIE, SIR?

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THAT MOVIE, SIR? I DIDN'T SEE IT.

MOVIE, SIR? I DIDN'T SEE IT. ALL RIGHT.

I DIDN'T SEE IT. ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, SIR.

ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, SIR. FAIR ENOUGH. I'LL BUY THAT.

ALL RIGHT, SIR. FAIR ENOUGH. I'LL BUY THAT. BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING,

FAIR ENOUGH. I'LL BUY THAT. BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING, TOM.

BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING, TOM. MY BLINDNESS HAS MADE ME MUCH

TOM. MY BLINDNESS HAS MADE ME MUCH MORE AWARE.

MY BLINDNESS HAS MADE ME MUCH MORE AWARE. MY SENSES OF TASTE, TOUCH, SMELL

MORE AWARE. MY SENSES OF TASTE, TOUCH, SMELL ARE HIGHLY DEVELOPED, MORE THAN

MY SENSES OF TASTE, TOUCH, SMELL ARE HIGHLY DEVELOPED, MORE THAN MOST PEOPLE WHO CAN SEE.

ARE HIGHLY DEVELOPED, MORE THAN MOST PEOPLE WHO CAN SEE. WELL, COULD YOU DEMONSTRATE?

MOST PEOPLE WHO CAN SEE. WELL, COULD YOU DEMONSTRATE? ALL RIGHT, WELL, FROM WHERE

WELL, COULD YOU DEMONSTRATE? ALL RIGHT, WELL, FROM WHERE I'M SITTING NOW, I CAN TELL

ALL RIGHT, WELL, FROM WHERE I'M SITTING NOW, I CAN TELL THAT WITHIN THE PAST HOUR, YOU

I'M SITTING NOW, I CAN TELL THAT WITHIN THE PAST HOUR, YOU PUT ON SOME 007 AFTER-SHAVING

THAT WITHIN THE PAST HOUR, YOU PUT ON SOME 007 AFTER-SHAVING LOTION, VINTAGE 1968.

PUT ON SOME 007 AFTER-SHAVING LOTION, VINTAGE 1968. AND YOU'RE STILL WEARING THE

LOTION, VINTAGE 1968. AND YOU'RE STILL WEARING THE SAME SOCKS FOR TWO DAYS IN A

AND YOU'RE STILL WEARING THE SAME SOCKS FOR TWO DAYS IN A ROW.

SAME SOCKS FOR TWO DAYS IN A ROW. RAY, RAY, I WISH WE COULD

ROW. RAY, RAY, I WISH WE COULD CONTINUE.

RAY, RAY, I WISH WE COULD CONTINUE. UNFORTUNATELY, WE'RE RUNNING

CONTINUE. UNFORTUNATELY, WE'RE RUNNING RIGHT OUT OF TIME.

UNFORTUNATELY, WE'RE RUNNING RIGHT OUT OF TIME. YES, YOUR TIE FEELS LIKE

RIGHT OUT OF TIME. YES, YOUR TIE FEELS LIKE SILK, TOO, BUT IT'S REALLY

YES, YOUR TIE FEELS LIKE SILK, TOO, BUT IT'S REALLY POLYESTER.

SILK, TOO, BUT IT'S REALLY POLYESTER. AND YOU STILL TUCK YOUR T-SHIRT

POLYESTER. AND YOU STILL TUCK YOUR T-SHIRT INSIDE YOUR BOXER SHORTS.

AND YOU STILL TUCK YOUR T-SHIRT INSIDE YOUR BOXER SHORTS. THAT'S SIMPLY UNCANNY, SIR.

INSIDE YOUR BOXER SHORTS. THAT'S SIMPLY UNCANNY, SIR. YOU KNOW, YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY

THAT'S SIMPLY UNCANNY, SIR. YOU KNOW, YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. PLEASE JOIN US ON "TOMORROW."

RIGHT. PLEASE JOIN US ON "TOMORROW." WE'LL BE TALKING WITH A MAN WHO

PLEASE JOIN US ON "TOMORROW." WE'LL BE TALKING WITH A MAN WHO HAS WRITTEN A BOOK, AND HE

WE'LL BE TALKING WITH A MAN WHO HAS WRITTEN A BOOK, AND HE CLAIMS THAT HE RAN A GAY BAR

HAS WRITTEN A BOOK, AND HE CLAIMS THAT HE RAN A GAY BAR IN MOSCOW IN THE EARLY '50s AND

CLAIMS THAT HE RAN A GAY BAR IN MOSCOW IN THE EARLY '50s AND THAT IT WAS FREQUENTED BY NONE

IN MOSCOW IN THE EARLY '50s AND THAT IT WAS FREQUENTED BY NONE OTHER THAN NIKITA KHRUSHCHEV.

THAT IT WAS FREQUENTED BY NONE OTHER THAN NIKITA KHRUSHCHEV. I STILL THINK YOUR HAIR'S AT

OTHER THAN NIKITA KHRUSHCHEV. I STILL THINK YOUR HAIR'S AT LEAST 12 DIFFERENT COLORS, TOO.

I STILL THINK YOUR HAIR'S AT LEAST 12 DIFFERENT COLORS, TOO. GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY.

LEAST 12 DIFFERENT COLORS, TOO. GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY. ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY. ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE,

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO

MORE ♪

♪ WHAT YOU SAID ♪

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK... ♪

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY] HEY, LOOK, MAN. GET HAPPY, OKAY?

HEY, LOOK, MAN. GET HAPPY, OKAY? THIS IS A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY.

GET HAPPY, OKAY? THIS IS A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY. THE HOTTEST WHITE GROUP IN THE

THIS IS A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY. THE HOTTEST WHITE GROUP IN THE COUNTRY IS GONNA RECORD YOUR

THE HOTTEST WHITE GROUP IN THE COUNTRY IS GONNA RECORD YOUR SONG.

COUNTRY IS GONNA RECORD YOUR SONG. YEAH, BUT I WANT TO RECORD MY

SONG. YEAH, BUT I WANT TO RECORD MY OWN SONG.

YEAH, BUT I WANT TO RECORD MY OWN SONG. HEY, MAN, YOU WILL, BABY.

OWN SONG. HEY, MAN, YOU WILL, BABY. YOU WILL.

HEY, MAN, YOU WILL, BABY. YOU WILL. BUT YOU'RE GONNA RECORD THE

YOU WILL. BUT YOU'RE GONNA RECORD THE RHYTHM AND BLUES VERSION, THE

BUT YOU'RE GONNA RECORD THE RHYTHM AND BLUES VERSION, THE ONES THAT'S GONNA BE PLAYED ON

RHYTHM AND BLUES VERSION, THE ONES THAT'S GONNA BE PLAYED ON THE SOUTH ON THOSE NEGRO RADIO

ONES THAT'S GONNA BE PLAYED ON THE SOUTH ON THOSE NEGRO RADIO STATIONS.

THE SOUTH ON THOSE NEGRO RADIO STATIONS. YEAH, YEAH. SO?

STATIONS. YEAH, YEAH. SO? WELL, THIS IS ONE THAT'S

YEAH, YEAH. SO? WELL, THIS IS ONE THAT'S COMING UP.

WELL, THIS IS ONE THAT'S COMING UP. THEN WE'RE GONNA RECORD THE ONE

COMING UP. THEN WE'RE GONNA RECORD THE ONE THAT'S GONNA BE PLAYED, YOU

THEN WE'RE GONNA RECORD THE ONE THAT'S GONNA BE PLAYED, YOU KNOW, THE POP VERSION, THE ONE

THAT'S GONNA BE PLAYED, YOU KNOW, THE POP VERSION, THE ONE THAT'LL BE PLAYED ON RADIO

KNOW, THE POP VERSION, THE ONE THAT'LL BE PLAYED ON RADIO STATIONS ALL OVER THE COUNTRY.

THAT'LL BE PLAYED ON RADIO STATIONS ALL OVER THE COUNTRY. AND THEY'RE ALSO GONNA PERFORM

STATIONS ALL OVER THE COUNTRY. AND THEY'RE ALSO GONNA PERFORM IT ON THE "ED SULLIVAN SHOW."

AND THEY'RE ALSO GONNA PERFORM IT ON THE "ED SULLIVAN SHOW." AND THE GROUP IS GONNA DO IT IN

IT ON THE "ED SULLIVAN SHOW." AND THE GROUP IS GONNA DO IT IN THE MOVIE THAT THEY GOT COMING

AND THE GROUP IS GONNA DO IT IN THE MOVIE THAT THEY GOT COMING UP CALLED "THE WEEKEND AT THE

THE MOVIE THAT THEY GOT COMING UP CALLED "THE WEEKEND AT THE WORLD'S FAIR."

UP CALLED "THE WEEKEND AT THE WORLD'S FAIR." MAN, THEY GONNA SELL THEM

WORLD'S FAIR." MAN, THEY GONNA SELL THEM MILLIONS OF COPIES.

MAN, THEY GONNA SELL THEM MILLIONS OF COPIES. AND THEY'RE GONNA GIVE YOU...

MILLIONS OF COPIES. AND THEY'RE GONNA GIVE YOU... THIS IS THE BEST THING... THEY

AND THEY'RE GONNA GIVE YOU... THIS IS THE BEST THING... THEY GONNA GIVE YOU ALL OF $400.

THIS IS THE BEST THING... THEY GONNA GIVE YOU ALL OF $400. OH, WELL, AT LEAST I CAN

GONNA GIVE YOU ALL OF $400. OH, WELL, AT LEAST I CAN UNDERSTAND THAT.

OH, WELL, AT LEAST I CAN UNDERSTAND THAT. SO, JUST CHEER UP AND ENJOY.

UNDERSTAND THAT. SO, JUST CHEER UP AND ENJOY. KNOCK, KNOCK.

SO, JUST CHEER UP AND ENJOY. KNOCK, KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

KNOCK, KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME? COME ON. COME ON.

ANYBODY HOME? COME ON. COME ON. ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, COME ON

COME ON. COME ON. ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, COME ON DOWN HERE.

ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, COME ON DOWN HERE. HI, MR. DeWITT.

DOWN HERE. HI, MR. DeWITT. HI, THERE.

HI, MR. DeWITT. HI, THERE. EVERYBODY, THIS IS

HI, THERE. EVERYBODY, THIS IS MR. RAY CHARLES.

EVERYBODY, THIS IS MR. RAY CHARLES. HOW YOU DOING?

MR. RAY CHARLES. HOW YOU DOING? HOW YOU DOING?

HOW YOU DOING? HOW YOU DOING? I'M GROUP LEADER JODY JOBO.

HOW YOU DOING? I'M GROUP LEADER JODY JOBO. AND THIS IS TODD, VIC, CHIP,

I'M GROUP LEADER JODY JOBO. AND THIS IS TODD, VIC, CHIP, TAMMY, AND PAMMY.

AND THIS IS TODD, VIC, CHIP, TAMMY, AND PAMMY. HI.

TAMMY, AND PAMMY. HI. HI.

HI. HI. HI.

HI. HI. HI.

HI. HI. HI.

HI. HI. OR, AS WE'RE KNOWN

HI. OR, AS WE'RE KNOWN PROFESSIONALLY, THE YOUNG

OR, AS WE'RE KNOWN PROFESSIONALLY, THE YOUNG CAUCASIANS.

PROFESSIONALLY, THE YOUNG CAUCASIANS. I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY,

CAUCASIANS. I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY, MR. CHARLES, WE'RE SO EXCITED

I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY, MR. CHARLES, WE'RE SO EXCITED ABOUT DOING THIS SONG.

MR. CHARLES, WE'RE SO EXCITED ABOUT DOING THIS SONG. OH, BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU.

ABOUT DOING THIS SONG. OH, BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU. OH, WOW.

OH, BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU. OH, WOW. I MEAN, WE REALLY LOVE

OH, WOW. I MEAN, WE REALLY LOVE "WHAT DID I SAY."

I MEAN, WE REALLY LOVE "WHAT DID I SAY." WHY, WE SING "WHAT DID I SAY" SO

"WHAT DID I SAY." WHY, WE SING "WHAT DID I SAY" SO WELL WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT PART OF

WHY, WE SING "WHAT DID I SAY" SO WELL WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT PART OF OUR ACT... "YOUNG CAUCASIANS'

WELL WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT PART OF OUR ACT... "YOUNG CAUCASIANS' SALUTE TO NEGROES."

OUR ACT... "YOUNG CAUCASIANS' SALUTE TO NEGROES." I SEE.

SALUTE TO NEGROES." I SEE. IT'S ALSO GONNA BE ON OUR NEW

I SEE. IT'S ALSO GONNA BE ON OUR NEW "SHADES OF WHITE" ALBUM, SIR.

IT'S ALSO GONNA BE ON OUR NEW "SHADES OF WHITE" ALBUM, SIR. SAY, WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE OUR

"SHADES OF WHITE" ALBUM, SIR. SAY, WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE OUR NEW ALBUM COVER, MR. DeWITT?

SAY, WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE OUR NEW ALBUM COVER, MR. DeWITT? SURE.

NEW ALBUM COVER, MR. DeWITT? SURE. COME ON. LET'S DO IT.

SURE. COME ON. LET'S DO IT. ALBUM COVER.

COME ON. LET'S DO IT. ALBUM COVER. ALBUM COVER.

ALBUM COVER. ALBUM COVER. WHOA!

ALBUM COVER. WHOA! TA-DA!

WHOA! TA-DA! IT'S FUNNY, ISN'T IT?

TA-DA! IT'S FUNNY, ISN'T IT? IT'S AN ALBUM COVER, BUT IT'S

IT'S FUNNY, ISN'T IT? IT'S AN ALBUM COVER, BUT IT'S FUNNY!

IT'S AN ALBUM COVER, BUT IT'S FUNNY! IT'S A FUNNY ALBUM COVER!

FUNNY! IT'S A FUNNY ALBUM COVER! [LAUGHS]

IT'S A FUNNY ALBUM COVER! [LAUGHS] WELL, HEY, MAN, WE HAVEN'T

[LAUGHS] WELL, HEY, MAN, WE HAVEN'T GOT MUCH TIME, YOU KNOW.

WELL, HEY, MAN, WE HAVEN'T GOT MUCH TIME, YOU KNOW. WHY DON'T YOU GET STARTED?

GOT MUCH TIME, YOU KNOW. WHY DON'T YOU GET STARTED? SURE, OKAY.

WHY DON'T YOU GET STARTED? SURE, OKAY. OKAY. OKAY.

SURE, OKAY. OKAY. OKAY. MR. CHARLES, HERE'S THE

OKAY. OKAY. MR. CHARLES, HERE'S THE YOUNG CAUCASIANS' VERSION OF

MR. CHARLES, HERE'S THE YOUNG CAUCASIANS' VERSION OF "WHAT DID I SAY."

YOUNG CAUCASIANS' VERSION OF "WHAT DID I SAY." [CHEERFUL INTRO PLAYS]

"WHAT DID I SAY." [CHEERFUL INTRO PLAYS] ♪ HEY, MAMA, DON'T YOU TREAT

[CHEERFUL INTRO PLAYS] ♪ HEY, MAMA, DON'T YOU TREAT ME WRONG ♪

♪ HEY, MAMA, DON'T YOU TREAT ME WRONG ♪ ♪ COME AND LOVE YOUR DADDY ALL

ME WRONG ♪ ♪ COME AND LOVE YOUR DADDY ALL NIGHT LONG ♪

♪ COME AND LOVE YOUR DADDY ALL NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ WHAT DID I SAY? ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ WHAT DID I SAY? ♪ YEAH!

♪ WHAT DID I SAY? ♪ YEAH! HIT IT, CUTIE!

YEAH! HIT IT, CUTIE! ♪ SEE THE GIRL WITH THE

HIT IT, CUTIE! ♪ SEE THE GIRL WITH THE DIAMOND RING ♪

♪ SEE THE GIRL WITH THE DIAMOND RING ♪ ♪ SHE KNOWS HOW TO SHAKE THAT

DIAMOND RING ♪ ♪ SHE KNOWS HOW TO SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ SHE KNOWS HOW TO SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

THING ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ WHAT DID I SAY? ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ WHAT DID I SAY? ♪ OH, THIS IS REALLY FUN!

♪ WHAT DID I SAY? ♪ OH, THIS IS REALLY FUN! YES, IT IS!

OH, THIS IS REALLY FUN! YES, IT IS! ♪ A MULE IS AN ANIMAL WITH

YES, IT IS! ♪ A MULE IS AN ANIMAL WITH LONG, FUNNY EARS ♪

♪ A MULE IS AN ANIMAL WITH LONG, FUNNY EARS ♪ ♪ AND I CAN TELL YOU THAT HE

LONG, FUNNY EARS ♪ ♪ AND I CAN TELL YOU THAT HE NEVER HEARS WHAT I SAY ♪

♪ AND I CAN TELL YOU THAT HE NEVER HEARS WHAT I SAY ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

NEVER HEARS WHAT I SAY ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ WHAT DID I SAY?

♪ HE-E-E-E-Y ♪ WHAT DID I SAY? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I SAY.

WHAT DID I SAY? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I SAY. WHAT?

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I SAY. WHAT? ♪ HE-E-Y ♪

WHAT? ♪ HE-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-Y ♪

♪ HE-E-Y ♪ ♪ HE-E-Y ♪ ♪ HO-O-O ♪

♪ HE-E-Y ♪ ♪ HO-O-O ♪ ♪ HO-O-O ♪

♪ HO-O-O ♪ ♪ HO-O-O ♪ ♪ HEY ♪

♪ HO-O-O ♪ ♪ HEY ♪ ♪ HEY ♪

♪ HEY ♪ ♪ HEY ♪ ♪ HO ♪

♪ HEY ♪ ♪ HO ♪ ♪ HO ♪

♪ HO ♪ ♪ HO ♪ ♪ HEY, HEY, HO, HO ♪

♪ HO ♪ ♪ HEY, HEY, HO, HO ♪ ♪ HEY, BABY, DON'T YOU RIDE ♪

♪ HEY, HEY, HO, HO ♪ ♪ HEY, BABY, DON'T YOU RIDE ♪ ♪ BABY, DON'T YOU RIDE ♪

♪ HEY, BABY, DON'T YOU RIDE ♪ ♪ BABY, DON'T YOU RIDE ♪ ♪ NO, YOU DON'T ♪

♪ BABY, DON'T YOU RIDE ♪ ♪ NO, YOU DON'T ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ NO, YOU DON'T ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ THAT'S... WHAT... WE... SA-A-Y ♪

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ THAT'S... WHAT... WE... SA-A-Y ♪ ♪ SO NOW YOU KNOW JUST WHAT WE

♪ THAT'S... WHAT... WE... SA-A-Y ♪ ♪ SO NOW YOU KNOW JUST WHAT WE SAY ♪

♪ SO NOW YOU KNOW JUST WHAT WE SAY ♪ OLé!

SAY ♪ OLé! THANK YOU.

OLé! THANK YOU. I GUESS THAT WAS PERFECT, AS

THANK YOU. I GUESS THAT WAS PERFECT, AS USUAL.

I GUESS THAT WAS PERFECT, AS USUAL. OH, WHAT DID YOU THINK,

USUAL. OH, WHAT DID YOU THINK, MR. DeWITT?

OH, WHAT DID YOU THINK, MR. DeWITT? FINE. FINE.

MR. DeWITT? FINE. FINE. WHAT DID YOU THINK,

FINE. FINE. WHAT DID YOU THINK, MR. CHARLES?

WHAT DID YOU THINK, MR. CHARLES? WELL, HONEY, I'LL TELL YOU

MR. CHARLES? WELL, HONEY, I'LL TELL YOU THE REAL TRUTH.

WELL, HONEY, I'LL TELL YOU THE REAL TRUTH. YOU SEE, I...

THE REAL TRUTH. YOU SEE, I... HE CAN'T BE OBJECTIVE BECAUSE

YOU SEE, I... HE CAN'T BE OBJECTIVE BECAUSE HE WROTE THE SONG.

HE CAN'T BE OBJECTIVE BECAUSE HE WROTE THE SONG. WHICH REMINDS ME.

HE WROTE THE SONG. WHICH REMINDS ME. RAY, I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ASK

WHICH REMINDS ME. RAY, I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ASK YOU.

RAY, I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ASK YOU. THE VERSE WE DIDN'T DO, "TELL

YOU. THE VERSE WE DIDN'T DO, "TELL YOUR MA, TELL YOUR PA, I'M

THE VERSE WE DIDN'T DO, "TELL YOUR MA, TELL YOUR PA, I'M GONNA SEND YOU BACK TO

YOUR MA, TELL YOUR PA, I'M GONNA SEND YOU BACK TO ARKANSAS."

GONNA SEND YOU BACK TO ARKANSAS." YES.

ARKANSAS." YES. LIKE, WHERE FROM ARKANSAS?

YES. LIKE, WHERE FROM ARKANSAS? I'M FROM ARKANSAS, AND I MIGHT

LIKE, WHERE FROM ARKANSAS? I'M FROM ARKANSAS, AND I MIGHT KNOW YOUR MA AND PA.

I'M FROM ARKANSAS, AND I MIGHT KNOW YOUR MA AND PA. WELL, IF I DON'T KNOW THEM, MY

KNOW YOUR MA AND PA. WELL, IF I DON'T KNOW THEM, MY PARENTS DO 'CAUSE THEY KNOW

WELL, IF I DON'T KNOW THEM, MY PARENTS DO 'CAUSE THEY KNOW PRACTICALLY EVERYONE IN THE

PARENTS DO 'CAUSE THEY KNOW PRACTICALLY EVERYONE IN THE STATE.

PRACTICALLY EVERYONE IN THE STATE. EVEN PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW, THEY

STATE. EVEN PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW, THEY KNOW.

EVEN PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW, THEY KNOW. COME ON, GUYS.

KNOW. COME ON, GUYS. WE GOT TO GET BACK IF WE'RE

COME ON, GUYS. WE GOT TO GET BACK IF WE'RE GONNA GET THAT DIP BEFORE

WE GOT TO GET BACK IF WE'RE GONNA GET THAT DIP BEFORE DINNER.

GONNA GET THAT DIP BEFORE DINNER. [ALL SPEAKING OVER EACH OTHER]

DINNER. [ALL SPEAKING OVER EACH OTHER] HEY, RAY, LOOK.

[ALL SPEAKING OVER EACH OTHER] HEY, RAY, LOOK. I THINK WE GOT OUR HIT, MAN.

HEY, RAY, LOOK. I THINK WE GOT OUR HIT, MAN. NOW, GET THIS OTHER THING OUT OF

I THINK WE GOT OUR HIT, MAN. NOW, GET THIS OTHER THING OUT OF THE WAY SO WE CAN GET OUT OF

NOW, GET THIS OTHER THING OUT OF THE WAY SO WE CAN GET OUT OF HERE, BABY.

THE WAY SO WE CAN GET OUT OF HERE, BABY. OKAY, MAN.

HERE, BABY. OKAY, MAN. BUT I STILL KIND OF LIKE MY OWN

OKAY, MAN. BUT I STILL KIND OF LIKE MY OWN VERSION.

BUT I STILL KIND OF LIKE MY OWN VERSION. [TRADITIONAL INTRO TO

VERSION. [TRADITIONAL INTRO TO "WHAT'D I SAY" PLAYS]

♪ OH, MAMA, DON'T TREAT ME WRONG ♪ ♪ COME AND LOVE ME ALL NIGHT

WRONG ♪ ♪ COME AND LOVE ME ALL NIGHT LONG ♪

♪ COME AND LOVE ME ALL NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ ALL NIGHT LONG ♪

LONG ♪ ♪ ALL NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ OH, BABY ♪

♪ ALL NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ OH, BABY ♪ ♪ ALL NIGHT LONG ♪

♪ OH, BABY ♪ ♪ ALL NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ TELL MA, TELL PA ♪

♪ ALL NIGHT LONG ♪ ♪ TELL MA, TELL PA ♪ ♪ GONNA SEND YOU TO ARKANSAS ♪

♪ TELL MA, TELL PA ♪ ♪ GONNA SEND YOU TO ARKANSAS ♪ ♪ BABY, OH, YOU WON'T DO RIGHT ♪

♪ GONNA SEND YOU TO ARKANSAS ♪ ♪ BABY, OH, YOU WON'T DO RIGHT ♪ ♪ GIRL, YOU KNOW YOU WON'T DO

♪ BABY, OH, YOU WON'T DO RIGHT ♪ ♪ GIRL, YOU KNOW YOU WON'T DO RIGHT ♪

♪ GIRL, YOU KNOW YOU WON'T DO RIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, WHAT'D I SAY? ♪

RIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ TELL ME ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ TELL ME ♪ ♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪

♪ TELL ME ♪ ♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪

♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ TELL ME WHAT'D I SAY, BABY ♪

♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ TELL ME WHAT'D I SAY, BABY ♪ ♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪

♪ TELL ME WHAT'D I SAY, BABY ♪ ♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ I WANT TO KNOW ♪

♪ WHAT'D I SAY? ♪ ♪ I WANT TO KNOW ♪ ♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪

♪ I WANT TO KNOW ♪ ♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪ ♪ I NEED TO KNOW ♪

♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪ ♪ I NEED TO KNOW ♪ ♪ I'VE GOT TO KNOW ♪

♪ I NEED TO KNOW ♪ ♪ I'VE GOT TO KNOW ♪ ♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪

♪ I'VE GOT TO KNOW ♪ ♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪ ♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪

♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪ ♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ I WANNA KNOW ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH, OHH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH, OHH ♪ ♪ OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ OOH, OHH ♪ ♪ OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, IT'S ALL ♪

♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ OH, IT'S ALL ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ OH, IT'S ALL ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT, BABY ♪

♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ SAY IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ SAY IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ SAY IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ BABY, IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OOH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH, OOH, SING IT ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OOH, OOH, SING IT ♪ ♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ OOH, OOH, SING IT ♪ ♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪

♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪ ♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪ ♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, BABY ♪

♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ OH, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪

♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ AW, FAN IT, BABY ♪

♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ AW, FAN IT, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ AW, FAN IT, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪

♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪

♪ OH, SHAKE IT UP ♪ ♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OW ♪

♪ BABY, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ ♪ OW ♪ ♪ OW ♪

♪ OW ♪ ♪ OW ♪ ♪ OH-H ♪

♪ OW ♪ ♪ OH-H ♪ ♪ OH-H ♪

♪ OH-H ♪ ♪ OH-H ♪ ♪ HUH ♪

♪ OH-H ♪ ♪ HUH ♪ ♪ HUH ♪

♪ HUH ♪ ♪ HUH ♪ ♪ HO ♪

♪ HUH ♪ ♪ HO ♪ ♪ HO ♪

♪ HO ♪ ♪ HO ♪ ♪ HUH, HO, BABY, I FEEL ♪

♪ HO ♪ ♪ HUH, HO, BABY, I FEEL ♪ ♪ MAKE ME SO GOOD ♪

♪ HUH, HO, BABY, I FEEL ♪ ♪ MAKE ME SO GOOD ♪ ♪ OH, I FEEL ♪

♪ MAKE ME SO GOOD ♪ ♪ OH, I FEEL ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪

♪ OH, I FEEL ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ EVERY MORNING ♪

♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ EVERY MORNING ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪

♪ EVERY MORNING ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ BABY ♪

♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ BABY ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪

♪ BABY ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ YOU MAKE ME FEEL ♪

♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ YOU MAKE ME FEEL ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪

♪ YOU MAKE ME FEEL ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ JUST FEELING GOOD ♪

♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ JUST FEELING GOOD ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪

♪ JUST FEELING GOOD ♪ ♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ OH, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD ♪ ♪ OH, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ OH, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ AH, DO IT AGAIN, BABY ♪

♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ AH, DO IT AGAIN, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ AH, DO IT AGAIN, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ SAY ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ SAY ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ SAY ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ JUST ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ JUST ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ JUST ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ DO IT ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ DO IT ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪

♪ DO IT ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ BABY, ONE MORE TIME ♪ ♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ TAKE ME HOME ♪

♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ TAKE ME HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ TAKE ME HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ I WANNA GO HOME, BABY ♪

♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ I WANNA GO HOME, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ I WANNA GO HOME, BABY ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ I WANNA GO HOME WITH YOU ♪

♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ I WANNA GO HOME WITH YOU ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ I WANNA GO HOME WITH YOU ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪

♪ OH, LET'S GO HOME ♪ ♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ [MUSIC STOPS]

♪ BABY, LET'S GO HOME ♪ [MUSIC STOPS] NOW, ALL RIGHT.

[MUSIC STOPS] NOW, ALL RIGHT. NOW, I TELL YOU WHAT, MAN.

NOW, ALL RIGHT. NOW, I TELL YOU WHAT, MAN. NOW, YOU BE HONEST NOW.

NOW, I TELL YOU WHAT, MAN. NOW, YOU BE HONEST NOW. YOU TELL ME THE TRUTH.

NOW, YOU BE HONEST NOW. YOU TELL ME THE TRUTH. HOW'D YOU LIKE THAT?

YOU TELL ME THE TRUTH. HOW'D YOU LIKE THAT? RAY, YOU LIKE IT, I LIKE IT,

HOW'D YOU LIKE THAT? RAY, YOU LIKE IT, I LIKE IT, BUT THESE WHITE PEOPLE AIN'T

RAY, YOU LIKE IT, I LIKE IT, BUT THESE WHITE PEOPLE AIN'T READY FOR THIS KIND OF STUFF,

BUT THESE WHITE PEOPLE AIN'T READY FOR THIS KIND OF STUFF, MAN.

READY FOR THIS KIND OF STUFF, MAN. NOW, LET'S GO AND EAT.

MAN. NOW, LET'S GO AND EAT. ALL RIGHT, MAN. OKAY.

Announcer: AND NOW "WEEKEND UPDATE" WITH CHEVY CHASE.

"WEEKEND UPDATE" WITH CHEVY CHASE. WHO?

CHEVY CHASE. WHO? SORRY. OLD SCRIPT.

WHO? SORRY. OLD SCRIPT. HEY, NO PROBLEM.

SORRY. OLD SCRIPT. HEY, NO PROBLEM. OUR TOP STORY TONIGHT... AFTER

HEY, NO PROBLEM. OUR TOP STORY TONIGHT... AFTER 10 MONTHS IN OFFICE, WASHINGTON

OUR TOP STORY TONIGHT... AFTER 10 MONTHS IN OFFICE, WASHINGTON SOURCES SPECULATE THAT

10 MONTHS IN OFFICE, WASHINGTON SOURCES SPECULATE THAT JIMMY CARTER'S DECLINING

SOURCES SPECULATE THAT JIMMY CARTER'S DECLINING POPULARITY MAY RESULT IN HIS

JIMMY CARTER'S DECLINING POPULARITY MAY RESULT IN HIS BEING A ONE-TERM PRESIDENT.

POPULARITY MAY RESULT IN HIS BEING A ONE-TERM PRESIDENT. ONE PERSON WHO SEEMS UNDAUNTED

BEING A ONE-TERM PRESIDENT. ONE PERSON WHO SEEMS UNDAUNTED BY THESE REPORTS IS

ONE PERSON WHO SEEMS UNDAUNTED BY THESE REPORTS IS LILLIAN CARTER, WHO, PICTURED

BY THESE REPORTS IS LILLIAN CARTER, WHO, PICTURED HERE, SAYS THAT SHE CAN FEEL

LILLIAN CARTER, WHO, PICTURED HERE, SAYS THAT SHE CAN FEEL THAT HER SON IS STILL GROWING IN

HERE, SAYS THAT SHE CAN FEEL THAT HER SON IS STILL GROWING IN THE JOB.

THAT HER SON IS STILL GROWING IN THE JOB. O.J. SIMPSON, THE STAR RUNNING

THE JOB. O.J. SIMPSON, THE STAR RUNNING BACK OF THE BUFFALO BILLS WHO

O.J. SIMPSON, THE STAR RUNNING BACK OF THE BUFFALO BILLS WHO WILL BE OUT FOR THE REST OF THIS

BACK OF THE BUFFALO BILLS WHO WILL BE OUT FOR THE REST OF THIS SEASON, UNDERWENT SURGERY THIS

WILL BE OUT FOR THE REST OF THIS SEASON, UNDERWENT SURGERY THIS WEEK IN BUFFALO.

SEASON, UNDERWENT SURGERY THIS WEEK IN BUFFALO. SHOWN HERE AFTER THE OPERATION,

WEEK IN BUFFALO. SHOWN HERE AFTER THE OPERATION, O.J. SAID HE'S LOOKING FORWARD

SHOWN HERE AFTER THE OPERATION, O.J. SAID HE'S LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT SEASON WHEN HE'LL COOK

O.J. SAID HE'S LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT SEASON WHEN HE'LL COOK FOR HIS FORMER TEAMMATES.

TO NEXT SEASON WHEN HE'LL COOK FOR HIS FORMER TEAMMATES. WELL, THERE WAS MORE TROUBLE

FOR HIS FORMER TEAMMATES. WELL, THERE WAS MORE TROUBLE AT KENT STATE THIS WEEK WHEN A

WELL, THERE WAS MORE TROUBLE AT KENT STATE THIS WEEK WHEN A GROUP OF RADICAL INFANTS FROM A

AT KENT STATE THIS WEEK WHEN A GROUP OF RADICAL INFANTS FROM A LOCAL NURSERY SCHOOL CLASHED

GROUP OF RADICAL INFANTS FROM A LOCAL NURSERY SCHOOL CLASHED WITH NATIONAL GUARDSMEN.

LOCAL NURSERY SCHOOL CLASHED WITH NATIONAL GUARDSMEN. REPORTS SAY THAT THE UNRULY

WITH NATIONAL GUARDSMEN. REPORTS SAY THAT THE UNRULY TODDLERS WERE PROTESTING THE

REPORTS SAY THAT THE UNRULY TODDLERS WERE PROTESTING THE CONSTRUCTION OF A JUNGLE GYM AT

TODDLERS WERE PROTESTING THE CONSTRUCTION OF A JUNGLE GYM AT THE SITE WHERE FOUR OF THEIR

CONSTRUCTION OF A JUNGLE GYM AT THE SITE WHERE FOUR OF THEIR PLAYMATES WERE UNJUSTLY SPANKED

THE SITE WHERE FOUR OF THEIR PLAYMATES WERE UNJUSTLY SPANKED SEVEN MONTHS AGO.

PLAYMATES WERE UNJUSTLY SPANKED SEVEN MONTHS AGO. THE NATIONAL HEALTH SERVICE

SEVEN MONTHS AGO. THE NATIONAL HEALTH SERVICE HAS CALLED A NATIONWIDE RABIES

THE NATIONAL HEALTH SERVICE HAS CALLED A NATIONWIDE RABIES ALERT.

HAS CALLED A NATIONWIDE RABIES ALERT. RABIES IS CARRIED BY RODENTS AND

ALERT. RABIES IS CARRIED BY RODENTS AND PASSED ON TO STRAY ANIMALS AND

RABIES IS CARRIED BY RODENTS AND PASSED ON TO STRAY ANIMALS AND HOUSE PETS.

PASSED ON TO STRAY ANIMALS AND HOUSE PETS. IT IS CHARACTERIZED BY A FOAMING

HOUSE PETS. IT IS CHARACTERIZED BY A FOAMING AT THE MOUTH AND A CRAZED

IT IS CHARACTERIZED BY A FOAMING AT THE MOUTH AND A CRAZED VICIOUSNESS.

AT THE MOUTH AND A CRAZED VICIOUSNESS. RABIES IS UNDETECTABLE IN ITS

VICIOUSNESS. RABIES IS UNDETECTABLE IN ITS EARLY STAGES, AND, ONCE IT DOES

RABIES IS UNDETECTABLE IN ITS EARLY STAGES, AND, ONCE IT DOES BECOME DETECTABLE, IT IS ALSO

EARLY STAGES, AND, ONCE IT DOES BECOME DETECTABLE, IT IS ALSO IRREVERSIBLE AND FATAL.

BECOME DETECTABLE, IT IS ALSO IRREVERSIBLE AND FATAL. SO, IF YOU ARE BITTEN BY AN

IRREVERSIBLE AND FATAL. SO, IF YOU ARE BITTEN BY AN ANIMAL THAT MAY BE RABID,

SO, IF YOU ARE BITTEN BY AN ANIMAL THAT MAY BE RABID, CAPTURE IT AND BRING IT TO A

ANIMAL THAT MAY BE RABID, CAPTURE IT AND BRING IT TO A DOCTOR.

CAPTURE IT AND BRING IT TO A DOCTOR. OTHERWISE, YOU WILL HAVE TO

DOCTOR. OTHERWISE, YOU WILL HAVE TO UNDERGO A PAINFUL SERIES OF

OTHERWISE, YOU WILL HAVE TO UNDERGO A PAINFUL SERIES OF RABIES SHOTS.

UNDERGO A PAINFUL SERIES OF RABIES SHOTS. SO, IF YOUR HUSBAND LOOKS LIKE

RABIES SHOTS. SO, IF YOUR HUSBAND LOOKS LIKE THIS AND BITES YOU, TAKE HIM,

SO, IF YOUR HUSBAND LOOKS LIKE THIS AND BITES YOU, TAKE HIM, ALIVE, TO A DOCTOR.

THIS AND BITES YOU, TAKE HIM, ALIVE, TO A DOCTOR. [HISSING]

ALIVE, TO A DOCTOR. [HISSING] THE SOCIETY OF SOCRATIC

[HISSING] THE SOCIETY OF SOCRATIC SCHOLARS REVEALED THIS WEEK NEW

THE SOCIETY OF SOCRATIC SCHOLARS REVEALED THIS WEEK NEW INFORMATION ABOUT THE DEATH OF

SCHOLARS REVEALED THIS WEEK NEW INFORMATION ABOUT THE DEATH OF SOCRATES.

INFORMATION ABOUT THE DEATH OF SOCRATES. IT SEEMS THAT THE PHILOSOPHER

SOCRATES. IT SEEMS THAT THE PHILOSOPHER WAS GROSSLY OVERWEIGHT, TRYING

IT SEEMS THAT THE PHILOSOPHER WAS GROSSLY OVERWEIGHT, TRYING TO DIET, AND THE HEMLOCK THAT

WAS GROSSLY OVERWEIGHT, TRYING TO DIET, AND THE HEMLOCK THAT KILLED HIM WAS ACTUALLY LIQUID

TO DIET, AND THE HEMLOCK THAT KILLED HIM WAS ACTUALLY LIQUID PROTEIN.

KILLED HIM WAS ACTUALLY LIQUID PROTEIN. I DIDN'T KNOW THAT SOCRATES

PROTEIN. I DIDN'T KNOW THAT SOCRATES WAS THAT HEAVY, JANE.

I DIDN'T KNOW THAT SOCRATES WAS THAT HEAVY, JANE. OH, YES.

WAS THAT HEAVY, JANE. OH, YES. HE WAS VERY HEAVY.

OH, YES. HE WAS VERY HEAVY. THE NAME ITSELF... SOCRATES...

HE WAS VERY HEAVY. THE NAME ITSELF... SOCRATES... COMES FROM THE GREEK ROOT

THE NAME ITSELF... SOCRATES... COMES FROM THE GREEK ROOT "SOCRAT," WHICH MEANS TUB OF

COMES FROM THE GREEK ROOT "SOCRAT," WHICH MEANS TUB OF LARD.

"SOCRAT," WHICH MEANS TUB OF LARD. WELL, THAT'S VERY

LARD. WELL, THAT'S VERY INTERESTING.

WELL, THAT'S VERY INTERESTING. YES.

INTERESTING. YES. WELL, LONGTIME RADIO AND

YES. WELL, LONGTIME RADIO AND COMEDIANS BOB AND RAY... LET'S

WELL, LONGTIME RADIO AND COMEDIANS BOB AND RAY... LET'S SEE... LONGTIME RADIO AND

COMEDIANS BOB AND RAY... LET'S SEE... LONGTIME RADIO AND TELEVISION COMEDIANS BOB AND RAY

SEE... LONGTIME RADIO AND TELEVISION COMEDIANS BOB AND RAY FINALLY HAVE ADMITTED THEY'VE

TELEVISION COMEDIANS BOB AND RAY FINALLY HAVE ADMITTED THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR OVER 30 YEARS.

FINALLY HAVE ADMITTED THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR OVER 30 YEARS. SHOWN HERE AT A PRESS

BEEN MARRIED FOR OVER 30 YEARS. SHOWN HERE AT A PRESS CONFERENCE, BOB ON THE RIGHT

SHOWN HERE AT A PRESS CONFERENCE, BOB ON THE RIGHT SAID IT WAS A RELIEF TO BE ABLE

CONFERENCE, BOB ON THE RIGHT SAID IT WAS A RELIEF TO BE ABLE TO WEAR HIS OWN CLOTHES AGAIN IN

SAID IT WAS A RELIEF TO BE ABLE TO WEAR HIS OWN CLOTHES AGAIN IN PUBLIC.

TO WEAR HIS OWN CLOTHES AGAIN IN PUBLIC. I'M TAKING THIS ONE HOME WITH

PUBLIC. I'M TAKING THIS ONE HOME WITH ME.

I'M TAKING THIS ONE HOME WITH ME. I THINK YOU SHOULD, DAN.

ME. I THINK YOU SHOULD, DAN. STICK IT TO YOUR PILLOW.

I THINK YOU SHOULD, DAN. STICK IT TO YOUR PILLOW. OKAY.

STICK IT TO YOUR PILLOW. OKAY. IN PHILADELPHIA, A STATUE OF

OKAY. IN PHILADELPHIA, A STATUE OF BENJAMIN FRANKLIN WAS RUSHED TO

IN PHILADELPHIA, A STATUE OF BENJAMIN FRANKLIN WAS RUSHED TO A HOSPITAL AFTER IT COLLAPSED

BENJAMIN FRANKLIN WAS RUSHED TO A HOSPITAL AFTER IT COLLAPSED WITH WHAT APPEARED TO BE A CASE

A HOSPITAL AFTER IT COLLAPSED WITH WHAT APPEARED TO BE A CASE OF LEGIONNAIRES' DISEASE.

WITH WHAT APPEARED TO BE A CASE OF LEGIONNAIRES' DISEASE. A LATER DIAGNOSIS REVEALED IT

OF LEGIONNAIRES' DISEASE. A LATER DIAGNOSIS REVEALED IT WAS JUST STONED.

A LATER DIAGNOSIS REVEALED IT WAS JUST STONED. JUST STONED.

WAS JUST STONED. JUST STONED. I GOT IT, DAN.

JUST STONED. I GOT IT, DAN. THE STATUE.

I GOT IT, DAN. THE STATUE. WELL, HERE'S BILL MURRAY WITH

THE STATUE. WELL, HERE'S BILL MURRAY WITH THESE WEEK'S REVIEW.

WELL, HERE'S BILL MURRAY WITH THESE WEEK'S REVIEW. BILL.

THESE WEEK'S REVIEW. BILL. THANK YOU, JANE.

BILL. THANK YOU, JANE. HELLO, YOU KNUCKLEHEADS.

THANK YOU, JANE. HELLO, YOU KNUCKLEHEADS. SAY, TONIGHT I WAS GONNA REVIEW

HELLO, YOU KNUCKLEHEADS. SAY, TONIGHT I WAS GONNA REVIEW THE NEW SCIENCE-FICTION MOVIE

SAY, TONIGHT I WAS GONNA REVIEW THE NEW SCIENCE-FICTION MOVIE "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD

THE NEW SCIENCE-FICTION MOVIE "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND," BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, TIME

"CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND," BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, TIME MAGAZINE CAME OUT WITH A REVIEW

KIND," BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, TIME MAGAZINE CAME OUT WITH A REVIEW OF THE MOVIE AND TOLD THE ENTIRE

MAGAZINE CAME OUT WITH A REVIEW OF THE MOVIE AND TOLD THE ENTIRE STORY.

OF THE MOVIE AND TOLD THE ENTIRE STORY. IT RUINED IT FOR ME.

STORY. IT RUINED IT FOR ME. NOW, I AM NOT GONNA GO PAY 4

IT RUINED IT FOR ME. NOW, I AM NOT GONNA GO PAY 4 BUCKS TO SEE A FILM WHEN I

NOW, I AM NOT GONNA GO PAY 4 BUCKS TO SEE A FILM WHEN I ALREADY KNOW WHAT HAPPENS.

BUCKS TO SEE A FILM WHEN I ALREADY KNOW WHAT HAPPENS. THAT'S THE WAY I FEEL.

ALREADY KNOW WHAT HAPPENS. THAT'S THE WAY I FEEL. GET OUT HERE. I MEAN IT.

THAT'S THE WAY I FEEL. GET OUT HERE. I MEAN IT. THE FILM IS DIRECTED BY

GET OUT HERE. I MEAN IT. THE FILM IS DIRECTED BY STEVEN SPIELBERG, THE GUY WHO

THE FILM IS DIRECTED BY STEVEN SPIELBERG, THE GUY WHO DIRECTED "JAWS."

STEVEN SPIELBERG, THE GUY WHO DIRECTED "JAWS." AND HE DESERVED AN OSCAR FOR

DIRECTED "JAWS." AND HE DESERVED AN OSCAR FOR "JAWS," AND HE DIDN'T GET IT.

AND HE DESERVED AN OSCAR FOR "JAWS," AND HE DIDN'T GET IT. IT WAS A RIP-OFF.

"JAWS," AND HE DIDN'T GET IT. IT WAS A RIP-OFF. AND I WAS HOPING HE'D GET ONE

IT WAS A RIP-OFF. AND I WAS HOPING HE'D GET ONE FOR "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS."

AND I WAS HOPING HE'D GET ONE FOR "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS." THEY SAY THE SPECIAL EFFECTS ARE

FOR "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS." THEY SAY THE SPECIAL EFFECTS ARE BETTER THAN "STAR WARS."

THEY SAY THE SPECIAL EFFECTS ARE BETTER THAN "STAR WARS." THEY SAY IT'S THE GREATEST MOVIE

BETTER THAN "STAR WARS." THEY SAY IT'S THE GREATEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR.

THEY SAY IT'S THE GREATEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR. COLUMBIA PICTURES SPENT $18

OF THE YEAR. COLUMBIA PICTURES SPENT $18 MILLION ON THE PROJECT.

COLUMBIA PICTURES SPENT $18 MILLION ON THE PROJECT. NOW, HOW CAN THEY MAKE THAT KIND

MILLION ON THE PROJECT. NOW, HOW CAN THEY MAKE THAT KIND OF MONEY BACK IF EVERYBODY

NOW, HOW CAN THEY MAKE THAT KIND OF MONEY BACK IF EVERYBODY ALREADY KNOWS WHAT'S GOING TO

OF MONEY BACK IF EVERYBODY ALREADY KNOWS WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN?

ALREADY KNOWS WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN? NOW, FRANK RIDGE WHO WROTE THE

HAPPEN? NOW, FRANK RIDGE WHO WROTE THE REVIEW OUGHT TO BE SLAPPED IN

NOW, FRANK RIDGE WHO WROTE THE REVIEW OUGHT TO BE SLAPPED IN THE FACE.

REVIEW OUGHT TO BE SLAPPED IN THE FACE. GET OUT OF HERE, FRANK.

THE FACE. GET OUT OF HERE, FRANK. I MEAN IT, YOU KNUCKLEHEAD.

GET OUT OF HERE, FRANK. I MEAN IT, YOU KNUCKLEHEAD. NOW EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT THE

I MEAN IT, YOU KNUCKLEHEAD. NOW EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT THE ALIENS ARE ATTACKING DREYFUSS'

NOW EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT THE ALIENS ARE ATTACKING DREYFUSS' CAR AND THE SPEEDOMETER SPINS

ALIENS ARE ATTACKING DREYFUSS' CAR AND THE SPEEDOMETER SPINS AROUND AND SO FORTH.

CAR AND THE SPEEDOMETER SPINS AROUND AND SO FORTH. DREYFUSS TRIES TO MAKE CONTACT

AROUND AND SO FORTH. DREYFUSS TRIES TO MAKE CONTACT WITH THE ALIENS.

DREYFUSS TRIES TO MAKE CONTACT WITH THE ALIENS. THEY COME BACK.

WITH THE ALIENS. THEY COME BACK. THEY KIDNAP A CHILD.

THEY COME BACK. THEY KIDNAP A CHILD. WHEN THE EARTHLINGS AND THE

THEY KIDNAP A CHILD. WHEN THE EARTHLINGS AND THE ALIENS FINALLY MEET, THEY SHOUT

WHEN THE EARTHLINGS AND THE ALIENS FINALLY MEET, THEY SHOUT "HELLO" TO EACH OTHER WITH

ALIENS FINALLY MEET, THEY SHOUT "HELLO" TO EACH OTHER WITH LIGHTS FLASHING AND MUSIC AND

"HELLO" TO EACH OTHER WITH LIGHTS FLASHING AND MUSIC AND STUFF.

LIGHTS FLASHING AND MUSIC AND STUFF. AND EVERYONE'S WAITING TO SEE

STUFF. AND EVERYONE'S WAITING TO SEE THE ALIENS, OF COURSE, BUT NOW

AND EVERYONE'S WAITING TO SEE THE ALIENS, OF COURSE, BUT NOW FROM THE TIME REVIEW, WE ALREADY

THE ALIENS, OF COURSE, BUT NOW FROM THE TIME REVIEW, WE ALREADY KNOW THEY HAVE SMALL ARMS, LARGE

FROM THE TIME REVIEW, WE ALREADY KNOW THEY HAVE SMALL ARMS, LARGE HEADS, AND TINY EARS.

KNOW THEY HAVE SMALL ARMS, LARGE HEADS, AND TINY EARS. SO, WHY SEE IT?

HEADS, AND TINY EARS. SO, WHY SEE IT? THERE'S THE WHOLE MOVIE RIGHT

SO, WHY SEE IT? THERE'S THE WHOLE MOVIE RIGHT THERE.

THERE'S THE WHOLE MOVIE RIGHT THERE. COLUMBIA PICTURES' STOCK WENT

THERE. COLUMBIA PICTURES' STOCK WENT WAY DOWN AFTER NEW YORK MAGAZINE

COLUMBIA PICTURES' STOCK WENT WAY DOWN AFTER NEW YORK MAGAZINE PANNED "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS."

WAY DOWN AFTER NEW YORK MAGAZINE PANNED "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS." AND THEN THEY HAD A SUCCESSFUL

PANNED "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS." AND THEN THEY HAD A SUCCESSFUL SCREENING HERE IN NEW YORK AND

AND THEN THEY HAD A SUCCESSFUL SCREENING HERE IN NEW YORK AND THE STOCK WENT WAY BACK UP.

SCREENING HERE IN NEW YORK AND THE STOCK WENT WAY BACK UP. AFTER THIS TIME REVIEW, WHAT'S

THE STOCK WENT WAY BACK UP. AFTER THIS TIME REVIEW, WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO THE STOCK?

AFTER THIS TIME REVIEW, WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO THE STOCK? THEY TOLD YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT

GONNA HAPPEN TO THE STOCK? THEY TOLD YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS."

THEY TOLD YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT "CLOSE ENCOUNTERS." THEY MAY AS WELL HAVE TOLD YOU

"CLOSE ENCOUNTERS." THEY MAY AS WELL HAVE TOLD YOU THAT DREYFUSS GOES ABOARD THE

THEY MAY AS WELL HAVE TOLD YOU THAT DREYFUSS GOES ABOARD THE SHIP WITH THEM AT THE END, WHICH

THAT DREYFUSS GOES ABOARD THE SHIP WITH THEM AT THE END, WHICH HE DOES, WHICH I PROBABLY

SHIP WITH THEM AT THE END, WHICH HE DOES, WHICH I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD YOU.

HE DOES, WHICH I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD YOU. WHOA, EXCUSE ME.

SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD YOU. WHOA, EXCUSE ME. WONDER WHAT THAT'S GONNA DO TO

WHOA, EXCUSE ME. WONDER WHAT THAT'S GONNA DO TO THE STOCK.

WONDER WHAT THAT'S GONNA DO TO THE STOCK. GEE.

THE STOCK. GEE. WOWEE.

GEE. WOWEE. WELL, WHERE IS THIS,

WOWEE. WELL, WHERE IS THIS, HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD OR

WELL, WHERE IS THIS, HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD OR WALL STREET, ANYWAY?

HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD OR WALL STREET, ANYWAY? WELL, GEE.

WALL STREET, ANYWAY? WELL, GEE. THAT'S THE REVIEW, I GUESS.

WELL, GEE. THAT'S THE REVIEW, I GUESS. I'M SORRY.

THAT'S THE REVIEW, I GUESS. I'M SORRY. GO SEE THE MOVIE.

I'M SORRY. GO SEE THE MOVIE. IT'S PROBABLY TERRIFIC.

GO SEE THE MOVIE. IT'S PROBABLY TERRIFIC. NOW, GET OUT OF HERE.

IT'S PROBABLY TERRIFIC. NOW, GET OUT OF HERE. I MEAN IT.

NOW, GET OUT OF HERE. I MEAN IT. I'M SORRY, JANE. BIG MISTAKE.

I MEAN IT. I'M SORRY, JANE. BIG MISTAKE. [LAUGHS]

I'M SORRY, JANE. BIG MISTAKE. [LAUGHS] DAN.

[LAUGHS] DAN. THANKS A LOT, BILL.

DAN. THANKS A LOT, BILL. WELL, ANIMALS ARE IN THE NEWS

THANKS A LOT, BILL. WELL, ANIMALS ARE IN THE NEWS AGAIN THIS WEEK.

WELL, ANIMALS ARE IN THE NEWS AGAIN THIS WEEK. BURT REYNOLDS, TO PUBLICIZE AN

AGAIN THIS WEEK. BURT REYNOLDS, TO PUBLICIZE AN UPCOMING MOVIE IN HOLLYWOOD,

BURT REYNOLDS, TO PUBLICIZE AN UPCOMING MOVIE IN HOLLYWOOD, RIPPED THE LEG OFF A DOG TO THE

UPCOMING MOVIE IN HOLLYWOOD, RIPPED THE LEG OFF A DOG TO THE DELIGHT OF SURROUNDING CROWDS.

RIPPED THE LEG OFF A DOG TO THE DELIGHT OF SURROUNDING CROWDS. AND IN A RELATED STORY, WILDLIFE

DELIGHT OF SURROUNDING CROWDS. AND IN A RELATED STORY, WILDLIFE OFFICIALS IN LITTLE ROCK,

AND IN A RELATED STORY, WILDLIFE OFFICIALS IN LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS, THIS WEEK ARE

OFFICIALS IN LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS, THIS WEEK ARE SEARCHING FOR A MAN WHO PUNCHED

ARKANSAS, THIS WEEK ARE SEARCHING FOR A MAN WHO PUNCHED AN AMERICAN EAGLE IN THE

SEARCHING FOR A MAN WHO PUNCHED AN AMERICAN EAGLE IN THE STOMACH.

AN AMERICAN EAGLE IN THE STOMACH. WE HAVE A LATE-BREAKING BULLETIN

STOMACH. WE HAVE A LATE-BREAKING BULLETIN FROM THE NBC DANCING "N"... AN

WE HAVE A LATE-BREAKING BULLETIN FROM THE NBC DANCING "N"... AN IMPORTANT BULLETIN HERE.

FROM THE NBC DANCING "N"... AN IMPORTANT BULLETIN HERE. BACK IT UP, "N."

IMPORTANT BULLETIN HERE. BACK IT UP, "N." BACK IT UP. BACK IT UP.

BACK IT UP, "N." BACK IT UP. BACK IT UP. OKAY. THANK YOU.

BACK IT UP. BACK IT UP. OKAY. THANK YOU. THE NBC DANCING "N."

OKAY. THANK YOU. THE NBC DANCING "N." THIS LATE-BREAKING STORY...

THE NBC DANCING "N." THIS LATE-BREAKING STORY... "TO HELL WITH THE BULLETIN.

THIS LATE-BREAKING STORY... "TO HELL WITH THE BULLETIN. WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME?"

"TO HELL WITH THE BULLETIN. WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME?" I HAVEN'T GONE DANCING IN

WILL YOU DANCE WITH ME?" I HAVEN'T GONE DANCING IN MONTHS.

I HAVEN'T GONE DANCING IN MONTHS. WELL, JANE, WE'RE NEWSMEN.

MONTHS. WELL, JANE, WE'RE NEWSMEN. WE'RE JOURNALISTS.

WELL, JANE, WE'RE NEWSMEN. WE'RE JOURNALISTS. WE'RE NOT ENTERTAINERS.

WE'RE JOURNALISTS. WE'RE NOT ENTERTAINERS. OH, COME ON, YOU OLD FOGY.

WE'RE NOT ENTERTAINERS. OH, COME ON, YOU OLD FOGY. WHAT ABOUT OUR CREDIBILITY?

OH, COME ON, YOU OLD FOGY. WHAT ABOUT OUR CREDIBILITY? WHAT ABOUT OUR RATINGS?

WHAT ABOUT OUR CREDIBILITY? WHAT ABOUT OUR RATINGS? PEOPLE WANT TO BE ENTERTAINED.

WHAT ABOUT OUR RATINGS? PEOPLE WANT TO BE ENTERTAINED. WELL, THAT'S TRUE.

PEOPLE WANT TO BE ENTERTAINED. WELL, THAT'S TRUE. IF PEOPLE DON'T WATCH US, WE'RE

WELL, THAT'S TRUE. IF PEOPLE DON'T WATCH US, WE'RE OUT OF WORK.

IF PEOPLE DON'T WATCH US, WE'RE OUT OF WORK. WHAT DO YOU SAY?

OUT OF WORK. WHAT DO YOU SAY? OKAY, LET'S DANCE.

WHAT DO YOU SAY? OKAY, LET'S DANCE. GOOD NIGHT AND HAVE A

OKAY, LET'S DANCE. GOOD NIGHT AND HAVE A PLEASANT TOMORROW.

GOOD NIGHT AND HAVE A PLEASANT TOMORROW. [RAGTIME MUSIC PLAYS]

Announcer: WEEKEND UPDATE IS A PRESENTATION OF "SATURDAY NIGHT" NEWS, KEEPING

A PRESENTATION OF "SATURDAY NIGHT" NEWS, KEEPING AMERICA INFORMED FOR OVER A 50th

"SATURDAY NIGHT" NEWS, KEEPING AMERICA INFORMED FOR OVER A 50th OF A CENTURY.

SINCE ABOUT 1960, I'VE BEEN WORKING WITH A BIG BAND. BUT BEFORE THAT, IN THE '50s, I

WORKING WITH A BIG BAND. BUT BEFORE THAT, IN THE '50s, I HAD A SMALL GROUP.

BUT BEFORE THAT, IN THE '50s, I HAD A SMALL GROUP. IT WAS JUST EIGHT OF US, BUT WE

HAD A SMALL GROUP. IT WAS JUST EIGHT OF US, BUT WE MUST HAVE PLAYED EVERY LITTLE

IT WAS JUST EIGHT OF US, BUT WE MUST HAVE PLAYED EVERY LITTLE SMALL DANCE HALL AND NIGHTCLUB

MUST HAVE PLAYED EVERY LITTLE SMALL DANCE HALL AND NIGHTCLUB FROM GEORGIA TO CALIFORNIA.

SMALL DANCE HALL AND NIGHTCLUB FROM GEORGIA TO CALIFORNIA. SO, I HAVE THIS... I GUESS IT'S

FROM GEORGIA TO CALIFORNIA. SO, I HAVE THIS... I GUESS IT'S BEEN ABOUT 18 YEARS SINCE I'VE

SO, I HAVE THIS... I GUESS IT'S BEEN ABOUT 18 YEARS SINCE I'VE SEEN THESE GUYS, SO I THOUGHT

BEEN ABOUT 18 YEARS SINCE I'VE SEEN THESE GUYS, SO I THOUGHT TONIGHT WOULD BE A MARVELOUS

SEEN THESE GUYS, SO I THOUGHT TONIGHT WOULD BE A MARVELOUS TIME TO BRING THEM ALL BACK

TONIGHT WOULD BE A MARVELOUS TIME TO BRING THEM ALL BACK TOGETHER WITH ME, YOU KNOW, FOR

TIME TO BRING THEM ALL BACK TOGETHER WITH ME, YOU KNOW, FOR A LITTLE NOSTALGIA.

TOGETHER WITH ME, YOU KNOW, FOR A LITTLE NOSTALGIA. AND BESIDES THAT, THEY OWE ME

A LITTLE NOSTALGIA. AND BESIDES THAT, THEY OWE ME SOME BREAD.

AND BESIDES THAT, THEY OWE ME SOME BREAD. SO, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET ME

SOME BREAD. SO, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET ME FIRST INTRODUCE TO YOU

SO, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET ME FIRST INTRODUCE TO YOU MR. PHILIP GUILBEAU.

FIRST INTRODUCE TO YOU MR. PHILIP GUILBEAU. [APPLAUSE]

MR. PHILIP GUILBEAU. [APPLAUSE] MR. MARCUS BELGRAVE.

[APPLAUSE] MR. MARCUS BELGRAVE. [APPLAUSE]

MR. MARCUS BELGRAVE. [APPLAUSE] MR. HANK CRAWFORD.

[APPLAUSE] MR. HANK CRAWFORD. [APPLAUSE]

MR. HANK CRAWFORD. [APPLAUSE] AND I BELIEVE THAT IS OLD

[APPLAUSE] AND I BELIEVE THAT IS OLD DAVID "FATHEAD" NEWMAN.

AND I BELIEVE THAT IS OLD DAVID "FATHEAD" NEWMAN. [APPLAUSE]

DAVID "FATHEAD" NEWMAN. [APPLAUSE] AND I THINK ALL Y'ALL KNOW THE

[APPLAUSE] AND I THINK ALL Y'ALL KNOW THE HOG HIMSELF, MR. LEROY COOPER.

AND I THINK ALL Y'ALL KNOW THE HOG HIMSELF, MR. LEROY COOPER. [APPLAUSE]

HOG HIMSELF, MR. LEROY COOPER. [APPLAUSE] THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

[APPLAUSE] THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. NOW WE'RE GONNA FIND OUT IF

THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. NOW WE'RE GONNA FIND OUT IF THESE OLD FOGIES CAN STILL CUT

NOW WE'RE GONNA FIND OUT IF THESE OLD FOGIES CAN STILL CUT THE MUSTARD.

THESE OLD FOGIES CAN STILL CUT THE MUSTARD. [INTRO TO "I GOT A WOMAN"

THE MUSTARD. [INTRO TO "I GOT A WOMAN" PLAYS]

[INTRO TO "I GOT A WOMAN" PLAYS] ♪ WELL ♪

[PLAYS] ♪ WELL ♪ ♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪

♪ WELL ♪ ♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪ ♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪

♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪ ♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪ ♪ OH, YEAH ♪

♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪ ♪ OH, YEAH ♪ ♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪

♪ OH, YEAH ♪ ♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪ ♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪

♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪ ♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪ ♪ OH, YEAH ♪

♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪ ♪ OH, YEAH ♪ ♪ SHE GIVE ME MONEY WHEN I'M IN

♪ OH, YEAH ♪ ♪ SHE GIVE ME MONEY WHEN I'M IN NEED ♪

♪ SHE GIVE ME MONEY WHEN I'M IN NEED ♪ ♪ YEAH, SHE'S A KIND OF FRIEND

NEED ♪ ♪ YEAH, SHE'S A KIND OF FRIEND INDEED ♪

♪ YEAH, SHE'S A KIND OF FRIEND INDEED ♪ ♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪

INDEED ♪ ♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪ ♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪

♪ I GOT A WOMAN WAY OVER TOWN ♪ ♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪ ♪ OH, YEAH ♪

♪ THAT'S GOOD TO ME ♪ ♪ OH, YEAH ♪ [INTRO TO "I BELIEVE TO MY

♪ OH, YEAH ♪ [INTRO TO "I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL" PLAYS]

[INTRO TO "I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL" PLAYS] ♪ ONE OF THESE DAYS ♪

[SOUL" PLAYS] ♪ ONE OF THESE DAYS ♪ ♪ AND IT WON'T BE LONG ♪

♪ ONE OF THESE DAYS ♪ ♪ AND IT WON'T BE LONG ♪ ♪ YOU GONNA LOOK FOR ME ♪

♪ AND IT WON'T BE LONG ♪ ♪ YOU GONNA LOOK FOR ME ♪ ♪ AND I'LL BE GONE ♪

♪ YOU GONNA LOOK FOR ME ♪ ♪ AND I'LL BE GONE ♪ ♪ NOW, YOU KNOW I BELIEVE,

♪ AND I'LL BE GONE ♪ ♪ NOW, YOU KNOW I BELIEVE, BABY ♪

♪ NOW, YOU KNOW I BELIEVE, BABY ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪

BABY ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ WHOA, I BELIEVE, BABY ♪

♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ WHOA, I BELIEVE, BABY ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪

♪ WHOA, I BELIEVE, BABY ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪

♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ I TELL YOU ♪

♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ I TELL YOU ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL, BABY ♪

♪ I TELL YOU ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL, BABY ♪ ♪ OH, YOU'RE TRYIN' TO MAKE A

♪ I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL, BABY ♪ ♪ OH, YOU'RE TRYIN' TO MAKE A FOOL OF ME ♪

♪ OH, YOU'RE TRYIN' TO MAKE A FOOL OF ME ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪

FOOL OF ME ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪ ♪ AHH ♪

♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪ ♪ AHH ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪

♪ AHH ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪ ♪ LAST NIGHT YOU WERE

♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪ ♪ LAST NIGHT YOU WERE DREAMIN' ♪

♪ LAST NIGHT YOU WERE DREAMIN' ♪ ♪ AND I HEARD YOU SAY ♪

DREAMIN' ♪ ♪ AND I HEARD YOU SAY ♪ OH, JOHNNY.

♪ AND I HEARD YOU SAY ♪ OH, JOHNNY. ♪ WHEN YOU KNOW MY NAME IS

OH, JOHNNY. ♪ WHEN YOU KNOW MY NAME IS RAY ♪

♪ WHEN YOU KNOW MY NAME IS RAY ♪ ♪ THAT'S WHY I BELIEVE, WOMAN ♪

RAY ♪ ♪ THAT'S WHY I BELIEVE, WOMAN ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪

♪ THAT'S WHY I BELIEVE, WOMAN ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ YES I BELIEVE ♪

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ YES I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ I TELL YOU I BELIEVE,

♪ YES I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ I TELL YOU I BELIEVE, BELIEVE ♪

♪ I TELL YOU I BELIEVE, BELIEVE ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪

BELIEVE ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YEAH, I DO, BABY ♪

♪ I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ YEAH, I DO, BABY ♪ ♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪

♪ YEAH, I DO, BABY ♪ ♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ YES, I BELIEVE ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL,

♪ WHOA ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL, YEAH ♪

♪ I BELIEVE TO MY SOUL, YEAH ♪ ♪ WELL, YOU'RE TRYIN' TO MAKE A

YEAH ♪ ♪ WELL, YOU'RE TRYIN' TO MAKE A FOOL OF ME ♪

♪ WELL, YOU'RE TRYIN' TO MAKE A FOOL OF ME ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪

FOOL OF ME ♪ ♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪ ONE, TWO.

♪ I BELIEVE IT ♪ ONE, TWO. [INTRO TO "THEM THAT GOT"

ONE, TWO. [INTRO TO "THEM THAT GOT" PLAYS]

[INTRO TO "THEM THAT GOT" PLAYS] ALL RIGHT.

♪ I'VE GOTTEN DOWN TO MY LAST PAIR OF SHOES ♪ ♪ CAN'T EVEN WIN A NICKEL BET ♪

PAIR OF SHOES ♪ ♪ CAN'T EVEN WIN A NICKEL BET ♪ ♪ BECAUSE, AH, THEM THAT'S GOT

♪ CAN'T EVEN WIN A NICKEL BET ♪ ♪ BECAUSE, AH, THEM THAT'S GOT ARE THEM THAT GETS ♪

♪ BECAUSE, AH, THEM THAT'S GOT ARE THEM THAT GETS ♪ ♪ AND I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' YET ♪

ARE THEM THAT GETS ♪ ♪ AND I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' YET ♪ ♪ THAT OLD SAYIN' "THEM THAT'S

♪ AND I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' YET ♪ ♪ THAT OLD SAYIN' "THEM THAT'S GOT ARE THEM THAT GETS" ♪

♪ THAT OLD SAYIN' "THEM THAT'S GOT ARE THEM THAT GETS" ♪ ♪ IS SOMETHIN' I CAN'T SEE ♪

GOT ARE THEM THAT GETS" ♪ ♪ IS SOMETHIN' I CAN'T SEE ♪ ♪ IF YOU GOTTA HAVE SOMETHIN'

♪ IS SOMETHIN' I CAN'T SEE ♪ ♪ IF YOU GOTTA HAVE SOMETHIN' BEFORE YOU GET SOMETHIN' ♪

♪ IF YOU GOTTA HAVE SOMETHIN' BEFORE YOU GET SOMETHIN' ♪ ♪ HOW YOU GET THE FIRST IS STILL

BEFORE YOU GET SOMETHIN' ♪ ♪ HOW YOU GET THE FIRST IS STILL A MYSTERY TO ME ♪

♪ HOW YOU GET THE FIRST IS STILL A MYSTERY TO ME ♪ ♪ I SEE FOLKS WITH LONG CARS AND

A MYSTERY TO ME ♪ ♪ I SEE FOLKS WITH LONG CARS AND FINE CLOTHES ♪

♪ I SEE FOLKS WITH LONG CARS AND FINE CLOTHES ♪ ♪ THAT'S WHY THEY'RE CALLED THE

FINE CLOTHES ♪ ♪ THAT'S WHY THEY'RE CALLED THE SMARTER SET ♪

♪ THAT'S WHY THEY'RE CALLED THE SMARTER SET ♪ ♪ BECAUSE THEY MANAGE TO GET ♪

SMARTER SET ♪ ♪ BECAUSE THEY MANAGE TO GET ♪ ♪ WHEN ONLY THEM THAT'S GOT

♪ BECAUSE THEY MANAGE TO GET ♪ ♪ WHEN ONLY THEM THAT'S GOT SUPPOSED TO GET ♪

♪ WHEN ONLY THEM THAT'S GOT SUPPOSED TO GET ♪ ♪ AND I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' YET ♪

SUPPOSED TO GET ♪ ♪ AND I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' YET ♪ [INTRO TO "HIT THE ROAD JACK"

♪ AND I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' YET ♪ [INTRO TO "HIT THE ROAD JACK" PLAYS]

[INTRO TO "HIT THE ROAD JACK" PLAYS] YOU KNOW, I GOT TO TELL YOU.

[PLAYS] YOU KNOW, I GOT TO TELL YOU. WHEN I GOT HOME THE OTHER DAY, I

YOU KNOW, I GOT TO TELL YOU. WHEN I GOT HOME THE OTHER DAY, I DIDN'T FIND A NOTE.

WHEN I GOT HOME THE OTHER DAY, I DIDN'T FIND A NOTE. BUT WHAT I FOUND WAS ONE OF

DIDN'T FIND A NOTE. BUT WHAT I FOUND WAS ONE OF THOSE LITTLE CASSETTES WITH MY

BUT WHAT I FOUND WAS ONE OF THOSE LITTLE CASSETTES WITH MY OLD LADY'S VOICE ON IT.

THOSE LITTLE CASSETTES WITH MY OLD LADY'S VOICE ON IT. I GOT TO TELL THE TRUTH.

OLD LADY'S VOICE ON IT. I GOT TO TELL THE TRUTH. I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT THE

I GOT TO TELL THE TRUTH. I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT THE WORDS WERE SAYING TO ME.

I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT THE WORDS WERE SAYING TO ME. THEY SAID...

WORDS WERE SAYING TO ME. THEY SAID... ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

THEY SAID... ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE,

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪

NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

NO MORE ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪ ♪ OH, WOMAN, OH, WOMAN ♪

NO MORE ♪ ♪ OH, WOMAN, OH, WOMAN ♪ ♪ DON'T TREAT ME SO MEAN ♪

♪ OH, WOMAN, OH, WOMAN ♪ ♪ DON'T TREAT ME SO MEAN ♪ ♪ YOU'RE THE MEANEST OLD WOMAN ♪

♪ DON'T TREAT ME SO MEAN ♪ ♪ YOU'RE THE MEANEST OLD WOMAN ♪ ♪ THAT I'VE EVER SEEN ♪

♪ YOU'RE THE MEANEST OLD WOMAN ♪ ♪ THAT I'VE EVER SEEN ♪ ♪ BUT I GUESS IF YOU SAY SO ♪

♪ THAT I'VE EVER SEEN ♪ ♪ BUT I GUESS IF YOU SAY SO ♪ ♪ I'M GONNA HAVE TO PACK MY

♪ BUT I GUESS IF YOU SAY SO ♪ ♪ I'M GONNA HAVE TO PACK MY THINGS AND GO ♪

♪ I'M GONNA HAVE TO PACK MY THINGS AND GO ♪ ♪ THAT'S RIGHT ♪

THINGS AND GO ♪ ♪ THAT'S RIGHT ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

♪ THAT'S RIGHT ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE,

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪

NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE, NO MORE ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪

NO MORE ♪ ♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK

♪ HIT THE ROAD, JACK ♪ ♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪

♪ AND DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪ COME ON, BABY.

NO MORE ♪ COME ON, BABY. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

COME ON, BABY. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ YOU DON'T MEAN THAT, DO YOU,

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ YOU DON'T MEAN THAT, DO YOU, HONEY?

YOU DON'T MEAN THAT, DO YOU, HONEY? ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

HONEY? ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I THOUGHT WE HAD A BETTER

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I THOUGHT WE HAD A BETTER UNDERSTANDING.

I THOUGHT WE HAD A BETTER UNDERSTANDING. CAN'T WE TALK THIS THING OVER?

UNDERSTANDING. CAN'T WE TALK THIS THING OVER? ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

CAN'T WE TALK THIS THING OVER? ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I DON'T THINK YOU KNOW WHO

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I DON'T THINK YOU KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO.

I DON'T THINK YOU KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

YOU'RE TALKING TO. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ DON'T KEEP SAYING THAT.

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ DON'T KEEP SAYING THAT. YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD.

DON'T KEEP SAYING THAT. YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE THIS KIND

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE THIS KIND OF TALK FROM NOBODY.

I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE THIS KIND OF TALK FROM NOBODY. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

OF TALK FROM NOBODY. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I DARE YOU TO SAY IT AGAIN.

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ I DARE YOU TO SAY IT AGAIN. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪

I DARE YOU TO SAY IT AGAIN. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ YOU JIVE.

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK ♪ YOU JIVE. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK

YOU JIVE. ♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪

♪ DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

NO MORE ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR!

♪ YEAH ♪ ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR! [UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS]

[TRUMPET SOLO]

[BARITONE SAXOPHONE SOLO]

[TRUMPET SOLO]

[ALTO SAXOPHONE SOLO]

[TENOR SAXOPHONE SOLO]

[ALTO SAXOPHONE SOLO]

[BAND PLAYS IN UNISON]

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] [MUSIC STOPS]

NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HERE'S MR. FRANKLYN AJAYE. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

HERE'S MR. FRANKLYN AJAYE. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU. I KNOW A LOT OF YOU DON'T KNOW

THANK YOU. I KNOW A LOT OF YOU DON'T KNOW WHO I AM.

I KNOW A LOT OF YOU DON'T KNOW WHO I AM. THAT'S FINE. THAT'S GOOD.

WHO I AM. THAT'S FINE. THAT'S GOOD. I HAVE BEEN ON THE ROAD A LOT.

THAT'S FINE. THAT'S GOOD. I HAVE BEEN ON THE ROAD A LOT. RECENTLY, I'VE BEEN DOING

I HAVE BEEN ON THE ROAD A LOT. RECENTLY, I'VE BEEN DOING COLLEGE TOURS, HAD A LOT OF TIME

RECENTLY, I'VE BEEN DOING COLLEGE TOURS, HAD A LOT OF TIME IN HOTELS, OKAY?

COLLEGE TOURS, HAD A LOT OF TIME IN HOTELS, OKAY? SO, LIKE, A LOT TIMES BEFORE THE

IN HOTELS, OKAY? SO, LIKE, A LOT TIMES BEFORE THE SHOW, I JUST SPEND SOME TIME

SO, LIKE, A LOT TIMES BEFORE THE SHOW, I JUST SPEND SOME TIME WATCHING TV.

SHOW, I JUST SPEND SOME TIME WATCHING TV. AND THE THING I NOTICE, IN EVERY

WATCHING TV. AND THE THING I NOTICE, IN EVERY CITY THAT I GO TO, THEY SHOW

AND THE THING I NOTICE, IN EVERY CITY THAT I GO TO, THEY SHOW "STAR TREK," RIGHT?

CITY THAT I GO TO, THEY SHOW "STAR TREK," RIGHT? IT'S RIGHT THERE.

"STAR TREK," RIGHT? IT'S RIGHT THERE. IT'S ON 7:00, GENERALLY, IN

IT'S RIGHT THERE. IT'S ON 7:00, GENERALLY, IN EVERY CITY.

IT'S ON 7:00, GENERALLY, IN EVERY CITY. FOR YOU WHO DIDN'T KNOW IT,

EVERY CITY. FOR YOU WHO DIDN'T KNOW IT, LIKE, "STAR TREK" IS GONNA HAVE

FOR YOU WHO DIDN'T KNOW IT, LIKE, "STAR TREK" IS GONNA HAVE A NEW SERIES NEXT YEAR, AND I'M

LIKE, "STAR TREK" IS GONNA HAVE A NEW SERIES NEXT YEAR, AND I'M REALLY GLAD 'CAUSE I'M REALLY

A NEW SERIES NEXT YEAR, AND I'M REALLY GLAD 'CAUSE I'M REALLY TIRED OF TRYING TO PICK NEW

REALLY GLAD 'CAUSE I'M REALLY TIRED OF TRYING TO PICK NEW STUFF OUT OF OLD EPISODES.

TIRED OF TRYING TO PICK NEW STUFF OUT OF OLD EPISODES. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

STUFF OUT OF OLD EPISODES. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? TRYING TO FIND SOMETHING THAT

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? TRYING TO FIND SOMETHING THAT WILL KEEP ME INTERESTED.

TRYING TO FIND SOMETHING THAT WILL KEEP ME INTERESTED. LIKE, YOU'LL BE WATCHING, RIGHT?

WILL KEEP ME INTERESTED. LIKE, YOU'LL BE WATCHING, RIGHT? WOW.

LIKE, YOU'LL BE WATCHING, RIGHT? WOW. UHURA HAS A RUN IN HER STOCKING.

WOW. UHURA HAS A RUN IN HER STOCKING. I DIDN'T NOTICE THAT THE FIRST

UHURA HAS A RUN IN HER STOCKING. I DIDN'T NOTICE THAT THE FIRST 98 TIMES I SAW THIS EPISODE.

I DIDN'T NOTICE THAT THE FIRST 98 TIMES I SAW THIS EPISODE. RIGHT?

98 TIMES I SAW THIS EPISODE. RIGHT? "STAR TREK" CENTERS AROUND THREE

RIGHT? "STAR TREK" CENTERS AROUND THREE MAJOR CHARACTERS... FOUR IF YOU

"STAR TREK" CENTERS AROUND THREE MAJOR CHARACTERS... FOUR IF YOU COUNT SCOTTY, BUT THE HELL WITH

MAJOR CHARACTERS... FOUR IF YOU COUNT SCOTTY, BUT THE HELL WITH SCOTTY, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

COUNT SCOTTY, BUT THE HELL WITH SCOTTY, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? HE'S ALWAYS IN THE ENGINE ROOM

SCOTTY, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? HE'S ALWAYS IN THE ENGINE ROOM DOING GOD KNOWS WHAT.

HE'S ALWAYS IN THE ENGINE ROOM DOING GOD KNOWS WHAT. YOU GOT CAPTAIN KIRK, RIGHT,

DOING GOD KNOWS WHAT. YOU GOT CAPTAIN KIRK, RIGHT, VERY MACHO, DECISIVE.

YOU GOT CAPTAIN KIRK, RIGHT, VERY MACHO, DECISIVE. HIS VOICE STARTS OFF EVERY

VERY MACHO, DECISIVE. HIS VOICE STARTS OFF EVERY EPISODE, RIGHT?

HIS VOICE STARTS OFF EVERY EPISODE, RIGHT? "SPACE"... AS THOUGH YOU DIDN'T

EPISODE, RIGHT? "SPACE"... AS THOUGH YOU DIDN'T KNOW.

"SPACE"... AS THOUGH YOU DIDN'T KNOW. "THE FINAL FRONTIER.

KNOW. "THE FINAL FRONTIER. THESE ARE THE VOYAGES OF THE

"THE FINAL FRONTIER. THESE ARE THE VOYAGES OF THE STARSHIP ENTERPRISE.

THESE ARE THE VOYAGES OF THE STARSHIP ENTERPRISE. ITS FIVE-YEAR MISSION... TO

STARSHIP ENTERPRISE. ITS FIVE-YEAR MISSION... TO EXPLORE NEW WORLDS, TO SEEK OUT

ITS FIVE-YEAR MISSION... TO EXPLORE NEW WORLDS, TO SEEK OUT NEW LIFE AND CIVILIZATIONS, TO

EXPLORE NEW WORLDS, TO SEEK OUT NEW LIFE AND CIVILIZATIONS, TO BOLDLY" KICK BEHIND WHERE NO

NEW LIFE AND CIVILIZATIONS, TO BOLDLY" KICK BEHIND WHERE NO BEHIND HAS BEEN KICKED BEFORE.

BOLDLY" KICK BEHIND WHERE NO BEHIND HAS BEEN KICKED BEFORE. IN THE NAME OF PEACE, RIGHT?

BEHIND HAS BEEN KICKED BEFORE. IN THE NAME OF PEACE, RIGHT? [HUMS THEME SONG]

IN THE NAME OF PEACE, RIGHT? [HUMS THEME SONG] RIGHT?

[HUMS THEME SONG] RIGHT? YOU GOT DR. McCOY, RIGHT, KNOWN

RIGHT? YOU GOT DR. McCOY, RIGHT, KNOWN AS "BONES"... VERY EMOTIONAL,

YOU GOT DR. McCOY, RIGHT, KNOWN AS "BONES"... VERY EMOTIONAL, VERY IRRATIONAL, NEVER WANTS TO

AS "BONES"... VERY EMOTIONAL, VERY IRRATIONAL, NEVER WANTS TO DO ANYTHING CAPTAIN KIRK SAYS,

VERY IRRATIONAL, NEVER WANTS TO DO ANYTHING CAPTAIN KIRK SAYS, NO MATTER HOW SIMPLE.

DO ANYTHING CAPTAIN KIRK SAYS, NO MATTER HOW SIMPLE. "I DARE NOT, JIM."

NO MATTER HOW SIMPLE. "I DARE NOT, JIM." THAT'S WHAT HE'S ALWAYS SAYING.

"I DARE NOT, JIM." THAT'S WHAT HE'S ALWAYS SAYING. "PULL UP YOUR ZIPPER, BONES."

THAT'S WHAT HE'S ALWAYS SAYING. "PULL UP YOUR ZIPPER, BONES." "I DARE NOT, JIM."

"PULL UP YOUR ZIPPER, BONES." "I DARE NOT, JIM." YET HE'S ALWAYS PICKING ON

"I DARE NOT, JIM." YET HE'S ALWAYS PICKING ON SPOCK, RIGHT?

YET HE'S ALWAYS PICKING ON SPOCK, RIGHT? "YOU POINTY-EARED FREAK.

SPOCK, RIGHT? "YOU POINTY-EARED FREAK. YOU HAVE NO EMOTIONS."

"YOU POINTY-EARED FREAK. YOU HAVE NO EMOTIONS." SPOCK IS COOL.

YOU HAVE NO EMOTIONS." SPOCK IS COOL. "YES, BUT MY ZIPPER'S UP."

SPOCK IS COOL. "YES, BUT MY ZIPPER'S UP." RIGHT?

"YES, BUT MY ZIPPER'S UP." RIGHT? 'CAUSE SPOCK IS A VULCAN WHO

RIGHT? 'CAUSE SPOCK IS A VULCAN WHO MATES ONCE EVERY SEVEN YEARS,

'CAUSE SPOCK IS A VULCAN WHO MATES ONCE EVERY SEVEN YEARS, WHICH IS WHY HE HAS AN ATTITUDE,

MATES ONCE EVERY SEVEN YEARS, WHICH IS WHY HE HAS AN ATTITUDE, OKAY?

WHICH IS WHY HE HAS AN ATTITUDE, OKAY? SPOCK IS THE COOLEST CHARACTER.

OKAY? SPOCK IS THE COOLEST CHARACTER. ALL THE WOMEN WANT SPOCK BECAUSE

SPOCK IS THE COOLEST CHARACTER. ALL THE WOMEN WANT SPOCK BECAUSE THEY CAN'T HAVE HIM.

ALL THE WOMEN WANT SPOCK BECAUSE THEY CAN'T HAVE HIM. SEE, THEY'RE ALWAYS HITTING ON

THEY CAN'T HAVE HIM. SEE, THEY'RE ALWAYS HITTING ON HIM.

SEE, THEY'RE ALWAYS HITTING ON HIM. "HEY, MR. SPOCK.

HIM. "HEY, MR. SPOCK. I SURE WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU

"HEY, MR. SPOCK. I SURE WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU SOME," RIGHT?

I SURE WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU SOME," RIGHT? "THAT DOES NOT COMPUTE."

SOME," RIGHT? "THAT DOES NOT COMPUTE." AND HE JUST GOES ABOUT HIS

"THAT DOES NOT COMPUTE." AND HE JUST GOES ABOUT HIS BUSINESS.

AND HE JUST GOES ABOUT HIS BUSINESS. THE THING ABOUT CAPTAIN KIRK IS

BUSINESS. THE THING ABOUT CAPTAIN KIRK IS THAT HE'S EITHER THE BRAVEST MAN

THE THING ABOUT CAPTAIN KIRK IS THAT HE'S EITHER THE BRAVEST MAN IN THE UNIVERSE OR THE MOST

THAT HE'S EITHER THE BRAVEST MAN IN THE UNIVERSE OR THE MOST FOOLISH.

IN THE UNIVERSE OR THE MOST FOOLISH. HE'S ALWAYS TALKING ROUGH, SEE?

FOOLISH. HE'S ALWAYS TALKING ROUGH, SEE? HE'S ALWAYS THREATENING PEOPLE.

HE'S ALWAYS TALKING ROUGH, SEE? HE'S ALWAYS THREATENING PEOPLE. HE'LL LAND ON A PLANET, START

HE'S ALWAYS THREATENING PEOPLE. HE'LL LAND ON A PLANET, START TALKING ROUGH, BEFORE HE EVEN

HE'LL LAND ON A PLANET, START TALKING ROUGH, BEFORE HE EVEN LEARNS IF HE CAN BREATHE IN THE

TALKING ROUGH, BEFORE HE EVEN LEARNS IF HE CAN BREATHE IN THE STUFF, CAPTAIN KIRK IS RUNNING

LEARNS IF HE CAN BREATHE IN THE STUFF, CAPTAIN KIRK IS RUNNING OFF AT THE MOUTH.

STUFF, CAPTAIN KIRK IS RUNNING OFF AT THE MOUTH. "GIVE US THE ZENITE.

OFF AT THE MOUTH. "GIVE US THE ZENITE. WE'RE FROM THE FEDERATION, DAMN

"GIVE US THE ZENITE. WE'RE FROM THE FEDERATION, DAMN IT.

WE'RE FROM THE FEDERATION, DAMN IT. I'M CAPTAIN KIRK.

IT. I'M CAPTAIN KIRK. THIS IS MY SHIP'S IDIOT,

I'M CAPTAIN KIRK. THIS IS MY SHIP'S IDIOT, MR. SPOCK," YOU KNOW.

THIS IS MY SHIP'S IDIOT, MR. SPOCK," YOU KNOW. AND THE THING IS, HE'S ALWAYS

MR. SPOCK," YOU KNOW. AND THE THING IS, HE'S ALWAYS TELLING HE'S FROM THE

AND THE THING IS, HE'S ALWAYS TELLING HE'S FROM THE FEDERATION.

TELLING HE'S FROM THE FEDERATION. MAN, THEY DON'T CARE.

FEDERATION. MAN, THEY DON'T CARE. YOU KNOW, THESE PEOPLE ARE

MAN, THEY DON'T CARE. YOU KNOW, THESE PEOPLE ARE GROTESQUE, MAN.

YOU KNOW, THESE PEOPLE ARE GROTESQUE, MAN. THEY DON'T CARE.

GROTESQUE, MAN. THEY DON'T CARE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

THEY DON'T CARE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THEY GO, "WE DON'T CARE WHERE

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THEY GO, "WE DON'T CARE WHERE YOU'RE FROM.

THEY GO, "WE DON'T CARE WHERE YOU'RE FROM. MAN, LOOK AT US.

YOU'RE FROM. MAN, LOOK AT US. WE HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS.

MAN, LOOK AT US. WE HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS. THINK WE CARE WHERE YOU'RE FROM?

WE HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS. THINK WE CARE WHERE YOU'RE FROM? WE'RE JUST HAPPY YOU'RE HERE,

THINK WE CARE WHERE YOU'RE FROM? WE'RE JUST HAPPY YOU'RE HERE, MAN, 'CAUSE WE'RE BORED.

WE'RE JUST HAPPY YOU'RE HERE, MAN, 'CAUSE WE'RE BORED. WE'RE TOO SMART TO HAVE FUN.

MAN, 'CAUSE WE'RE BORED. WE'RE TOO SMART TO HAVE FUN. SO, I'M GONNA TURN YOUR BLACK

WE'RE TOO SMART TO HAVE FUN. SO, I'M GONNA TURN YOUR BLACK SECURITY MAN INTO A CUBE."

SO, I'M GONNA TURN YOUR BLACK SECURITY MAN INTO A CUBE." BROTHERS GOING, "HEY...

SECURITY MAN INTO A CUBE." BROTHERS GOING, "HEY... BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY!

BROTHERS GOING, "HEY... BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY! BEAM ME UP, MAN!"

BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY! BEAM ME UP, MAN!" [SQUEAKING]

BEAM ME UP, MAN!" [SQUEAKING] "ANALYZE, MR. SPOCK."

[SQUEAKING] "ANALYZE, MR. SPOCK." [BEEPING]

"ANALYZE, MR. SPOCK." [BEEPING] "THE NIGGER'S A CUBE, CAPTAIN."

[BEEPING] "THE NIGGER'S A CUBE, CAPTAIN." [LAUGHTER]

"THE NIGGER'S A CUBE, CAPTAIN." [LAUGHTER] "JIM, I DON'T THINK WE SHOULD

[LAUGHTER] "JIM, I DON'T THINK WE SHOULD MESS WITH THEM.

"JIM, I DON'T THINK WE SHOULD MESS WITH THEM. THEY HIT WATSON.

MESS WITH THEM. THEY HIT WATSON. HE WAS THE FASTEST ONE WE HAD."

THEY HIT WATSON. HE WAS THE FASTEST ONE WE HAD." YOU KNOW?

HE WAS THE FASTEST ONE WE HAD." YOU KNOW? IT'S LIKE, SPOCK IS VERY

YOU KNOW? IT'S LIKE, SPOCK IS VERY LOGICAL, SEE.

IT'S LIKE, SPOCK IS VERY LOGICAL, SEE. HE'S VERY LOGICAL FOR ABOUT SIX

LOGICAL, SEE. HE'S VERY LOGICAL FOR ABOUT SIX YEARS.

HE'S VERY LOGICAL FOR ABOUT SIX YEARS. THEN, HIS SEVENTH YEAR, HIS

YEARS. THEN, HIS SEVENTH YEAR, HIS JONES COMES DOWN, AND HE GOES

THEN, HIS SEVENTH YEAR, HIS JONES COMES DOWN, AND HE GOES MAD.

JONES COMES DOWN, AND HE GOES MAD. DID YOU EVER SEE THE EPISODE

MAD. DID YOU EVER SEE THE EPISODE WHERE SPOCK HAD TO GET DOWN?

DID YOU EVER SEE THE EPISODE WHERE SPOCK HAD TO GET DOWN? HE WENT CRAZY, MAN.

WHERE SPOCK HAD TO GET DOWN? HE WENT CRAZY, MAN. HE WAS CRYING.

HE WENT CRAZY, MAN. HE WAS CRYING. HE WAS LAUGHING.

HE WAS CRYING. HE WAS LAUGHING. HE WAS HITTING ON CAPTAIN KIRK.

HE WAS LAUGHING. HE WAS HITTING ON CAPTAIN KIRK. JIM SAID, "WHAT'S WRONG WITH

HE WAS HITTING ON CAPTAIN KIRK. JIM SAID, "WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM, BONES?"

JIM SAID, "WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM, BONES?" "HE'S SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED, JIM.

HIM, BONES?" "HE'S SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED, JIM. THAT'S WHY HIS EARS ARE POINTED.

"HE'S SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED, JIM. THAT'S WHY HIS EARS ARE POINTED. THAT STUFF IS BACKED UP."

THAT'S WHY HIS EARS ARE POINTED. THAT STUFF IS BACKED UP." [LAUGHTER]

THAT STUFF IS BACKED UP." [LAUGHTER] ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU.

[LAUGHTER] ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] THANK YOU. HEY, MAN, YOU KNOW.

THANK YOU. HEY, MAN, YOU KNOW. TV, YOU KNOW.

HEY, MAN, YOU KNOW. TV, YOU KNOW. HEY, ARE WE OFF? YEAH?

TV, YOU KNOW. HEY, ARE WE OFF? YEAH? [APPLAUSE]

SURE, I WAS SKEPTICAL. I THINK EVERYBODY IS. BUT, BELIEVE ME, I CAN NOW READ

I THINK EVERYBODY IS. BUT, BELIEVE ME, I CAN NOW READ 10, MAYBE 12 TIMES SLOWER THAN

BUT, BELIEVE ME, I CAN NOW READ 10, MAYBE 12 TIMES SLOWER THAN BEFORE.

[LAUGHS] I USED TO BE A HEAVY SPEED-READER, AND I NEVER

I USED TO BE A HEAVY SPEED-READER, AND I NEVER LAUGHED WHEN I READ MARK TWAIN.

SPEED-READER, AND I NEVER LAUGHED WHEN I READ MARK TWAIN. BUT NOW THAT I TAKE MY TIME, I

LAUGHED WHEN I READ MARK TWAIN. BUT NOW THAT I TAKE MY TIME, I FIND HIM VERY FUNNY.

BUT NOW THAT I TAKE MY TIME, I FIND HIM VERY FUNNY. DID YOU KNOW THAT READING ALL

FIND HIM VERY FUNNY. DID YOU KNOW THAT READING ALL THE WORDS IN A STORY CAN HELP

DID YOU KNOW THAT READING ALL THE WORDS IN A STORY CAN HELP YOU UNDERSTAND THE HUMOR?

THE WORDS IN A STORY CAN HELP YOU UNDERSTAND THE HUMOR? I'M A BRAIN SURGEON, AND, UH,

YOU UNDERSTAND THE HUMOR? I'M A BRAIN SURGEON, AND, UH, I USED TO JUST FLY THROUGH THESE

I'M A BRAIN SURGEON, AND, UH, I USED TO JUST FLY THROUGH THESE TECHNICAL MEDICAL JOURNALS, YOU

I USED TO JUST FLY THROUGH THESE TECHNICAL MEDICAL JOURNALS, YOU KNOW?

TECHNICAL MEDICAL JOURNALS, YOU KNOW? AND I FOUND I WAS MAKING A LOT

KNOW? AND I FOUND I WAS MAKING A LOT OF MISTAKES IN THE OPERATING

AND I FOUND I WAS MAKING A LOT OF MISTAKES IN THE OPERATING ROOM.

OF MISTAKES IN THE OPERATING ROOM. AND NOW, WITH THE EVELYN WOODSKI

ROOM. AND NOW, WITH THE EVELYN WOODSKI SLOW READING COURSE, I CATCH

AND NOW, WITH THE EVELYN WOODSKI SLOW READING COURSE, I CATCH MORE OF THE IMPORTANT PROCEDURAL

SLOW READING COURSE, I CATCH MORE OF THE IMPORTANT PROCEDURAL STUFF, AND I FIND I'M A BETTER

MORE OF THE IMPORTANT PROCEDURAL STUFF, AND I FIND I'M A BETTER SURGEON FOR IT.

STUFF, AND I FIND I'M A BETTER SURGEON FOR IT. Announcer: YES,

SURGEON FOR IT. Announcer: YES, EVELYN WOODSKI CAN HELP YOU

Announcer: YES, EVELYN WOODSKI CAN HELP YOU ENJOY READING AGAIN.

AND THERE'S... EVELYN... WOODSKI'S... SLOW... READING... COURSE...

EVELYN... WOODSKI'S... SLOW... READING... COURSE... FOR BRAILLE.

SLOW... READING... COURSE... FOR BRAILLE. I... USED TO... GET... BLISTERS...

FOR BRAILLE. I... USED TO... GET... BLISTERS... ON MY FINGERS.

I... USED TO... GET... BLISTERS... ON MY FINGERS. NOW... I JUST... SIT... BACK...

ON MY FINGERS. NOW... I JUST... SIT... BACK... AND ENJOY.

Announcer: CALL NOW ON THIS TOLL-FREE NUMBER FOR YOUR FIRST FREE LESSON.

OH, I LOVE NEW YORK... EVERYTHING ABOUT IT, EVEN CON EDISON, THE ELECTRIC

EVERYTHING ABOUT IT, EVEN CON EDISON, THE ELECTRIC COMPANY.

CON EDISON, THE ELECTRIC COMPANY. AS A MATTER OF FACT, WHEN I WAS

COMPANY. AS A MATTER OF FACT, WHEN I WAS IN NEW YORK LAST SUMMER, IT WAS

AS A MATTER OF FACT, WHEN I WAS IN NEW YORK LAST SUMMER, IT WAS CON ED. WHO CAME TO MY RESCUE.

IN NEW YORK LAST SUMMER, IT WAS CON ED. WHO CAME TO MY RESCUE. OH, YES.

CON ED. WHO CAME TO MY RESCUE. OH, YES. I'M HAVING A MARVELOUS TIME.

OH, YES. I'M HAVING A MARVELOUS TIME. JUST YESTERDAY I WAS ON THE

I'M HAVING A MARVELOUS TIME. JUST YESTERDAY I WAS ON THE OBSERVATION DECK OF THE

JUST YESTERDAY I WAS ON THE OBSERVATION DECK OF THE WORLD TRADE CENTER.

OBSERVATION DECK OF THE WORLD TRADE CENTER. YOU KNOW, I COULD SMELL ALL THE

WORLD TRADE CENTER. YOU KNOW, I COULD SMELL ALL THE WAY TO NEW JERSEY.

YOU KNOW, I COULD SMELL ALL THE WAY TO NEW JERSEY. [KNOCK ON DOOR]

WAY TO NEW JERSEY. [KNOCK ON DOOR] MM-HMM.

[KNOCK ON DOOR] MM-HMM. WAIT A MINUTE. HOLD ON.

MM-HMM. WAIT A MINUTE. HOLD ON. SOMEBODY'S AT THE DOOR.

WAIT A MINUTE. HOLD ON. SOMEBODY'S AT THE DOOR. YES, WHO IS IT?

SOMEBODY'S AT THE DOOR. YES, WHO IS IT? ROOM SERVICE!

YES, WHO IS IT? ROOM SERVICE! JUST A MINUTE.

ROOM SERVICE! JUST A MINUTE. LISTEN, I GOT TO GO NOW, BUT

JUST A MINUTE. LISTEN, I GOT TO GO NOW, BUT I'LL CALL YOU BACK LATER.

LISTEN, I GOT TO GO NOW, BUT I'LL CALL YOU BACK LATER. BE COOL.

I'LL CALL YOU BACK LATER. BE COOL. ROOM SERVICE?

BE COOL. ROOM SERVICE? I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT

ROOM SERVICE? I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT ROOM SERVICE.

I DON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING ABOUT ROOM SERVICE. ROOM SERVICE.

ROOM SERVICE. ROOM SERVICE. LET'S SEE HERE.

ROOM SERVICE. LET'S SEE HERE. YES?

LET'S SEE HERE. YES? PUT YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR.

YES? PUT YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR. COOPERATE, AND YOU WON'T GET

PUT YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR. COOPERATE, AND YOU WON'T GET HURT.

COOPERATE, AND YOU WON'T GET HURT. YES, SIR.

HURT. YES, SIR. ANYTHING YOU SAY, MISTER.

YES, SIR. ANYTHING YOU SAY, MISTER. HEY, HEY, HEY, BOSS.

ANYTHING YOU SAY, MISTER. HEY, HEY, HEY, BOSS. THIS HERE IS RAY CHARLES.

HEY, HEY, HEY, BOSS. THIS HERE IS RAY CHARLES. WHO?

THIS HERE IS RAY CHARLES. WHO? RAY CHARLES, THE KING OF

WHO? RAY CHARLES, THE KING OF SOUL, MAN.

RAY CHARLES, THE KING OF SOUL, MAN. WE CAN'T ROB HIM.

SOUL, MAN. WE CAN'T ROB HIM. ARE YOU KIDDING?

WE CAN'T ROB HIM. ARE YOU KIDDING? THIS WILL BE A CINCH.

ARE YOU KIDDING? THIS WILL BE A CINCH. TIE HIM UP.

THIS WILL BE A CINCH. TIE HIM UP. OH, MAN, I CAN'T DO THAT.

TIE HIM UP. OH, MAN, I CAN'T DO THAT. I SAID TIE HIM UP, MAN.

OH, MAN, I CAN'T DO THAT. I SAID TIE HIM UP, MAN. WHICH ONE OF Y'ALL GOT THE

I SAID TIE HIM UP, MAN. WHICH ONE OF Y'ALL GOT THE GUN?

WHICH ONE OF Y'ALL GOT THE GUN? I DO.

GUN? I DO. I THINK YOU BETTER LISTEN TO

I DO. I THINK YOU BETTER LISTEN TO HIM.

I THINK YOU BETTER LISTEN TO HIM. O-O-OKAY. OKAY.

HIM. O-O-OKAY. OKAY. TAKE THE ROPE OUT OF THE BAG

O-O-OKAY. OKAY. TAKE THE ROPE OUT OF THE BAG AND TIE HIM UP.

TAKE THE ROPE OUT OF THE BAG AND TIE HIM UP. I'M SORRY, MR. CHARLES, BUT I

AND TIE HIM UP. I'M SORRY, MR. CHARLES, BUT I GUESS I GOTTA.

I'M SORRY, MR. CHARLES, BUT I GUESS I GOTTA. HEY, THE LIGHTS ARE GOING OFF.

GUESS I GOTTA. HEY, THE LIGHTS ARE GOING OFF. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

HEY, THE LIGHTS ARE GOING OFF. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? HEY! HEY!

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? HEY! HEY! IT'S A BLACKOUT!

HEY! HEY! IT'S A BLACKOUT! IT IS?

IT'S A BLACKOUT! IT IS? YEAH! I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING!

IT IS? YEAH! I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING! YOU CAN'T?

YEAH! I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING! YOU CAN'T? NO!

YOU CAN'T? NO! OW! OOH!

NO! OW! OOH! OOH! OW!

OW! OOH! OOH! OW! [CRASH, GLASS BREAKING]

OOH! OW! [CRASH, GLASS BREAKING] [GRUNTING]

[CRASH, GLASS BREAKING] [GRUNTING] LET'S SEE HERE.

[GRUNTING] LET'S SEE HERE. HELLO?

LET'S SEE HERE. HELLO? YOU SAID THE LIGHTS JUST CAME

HELLO? YOU SAID THE LIGHTS JUST CAME BACK ON?

YOU SAID THE LIGHTS JUST CAME BACK ON? WHAT ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT

BACK ON? WHAT ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT FOR?

WHAT ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT FOR? IS THIS ROOM SERVICE?

FOR? IS THIS ROOM SERVICE? OH, WELL, LISTEN.

IS THIS ROOM SERVICE? OH, WELL, LISTEN. THIS IS RAY CHARLES IN 1722.

OH, WELL, LISTEN. THIS IS RAY CHARLES IN 1722. AND I'D LIKE TO ORDER SOME NECK

THIS IS RAY CHARLES IN 1722. AND I'D LIKE TO ORDER SOME NECK BONES AND COLLARD GREENS AND

AND I'D LIKE TO ORDER SOME NECK BONES AND COLLARD GREENS AND POTATO SALAD AND TWO TALL

BONES AND COLLARD GREENS AND POTATO SALAD AND TWO TALL GLASSES OF ICE TEA.

POTATO SALAD AND TWO TALL GLASSES OF ICE TEA. YOU GOT IT? OKAY.

GLASSES OF ICE TEA. YOU GOT IT? OKAY. NOW, WHEN YOU GET THAT FINISHED,

YOU GOT IT? OKAY. NOW, WHEN YOU GET THAT FINISHED, WOULD YOU PLEASE SEND UP THE

NOW, WHEN YOU GET THAT FINISHED, WOULD YOU PLEASE SEND UP THE POLICE?

WOULD YOU PLEASE SEND UP THE POLICE? GOOD NIGHT.

HOW ARE YOU? I MAY OR MAY NOT BE BUCK HENRY, BUT I AM HOSTING NEXT WEEK'S

I MAY OR MAY NOT BE BUCK HENRY, BUT I AM HOSTING NEXT WEEK'S SHOW WITH LEON REDBONE AS MY

BUT I AM HOSTING NEXT WEEK'S SHOW WITH LEON REDBONE AS MY GUEST AND THE FIVE... COUNT

SHOW WITH LEON REDBONE AS MY GUEST AND THE FIVE... COUNT THEM, FIVE... FINALISTS IN THE

GUEST AND THE FIVE... COUNT THEM, FIVE... FINALISTS IN THE "ANYONE CAN HOST"

THEM, FIVE... FINALISTS IN THE "ANYONE CAN HOST" "SATURDAY NIGHT" SHOW CONTEST.

"ANYONE CAN HOST" "SATURDAY NIGHT" SHOW CONTEST. WE'VE READ 150,000 POSTCARDS

"SATURDAY NIGHT" SHOW CONTEST. WE'VE READ 150,000 POSTCARDS FROM YOU AND, BELIEVE ME,

WE'VE READ 150,000 POSTCARDS FROM YOU AND, BELIEVE ME, AMERICA'S IN A LOT OF TROUBLE.

FROM YOU AND, BELIEVE ME, AMERICA'S IN A LOT OF TROUBLE. [APPLAUSE]

♪ THERE'S A BRIGHT GOLDEN HAZE IN THE MEADOW ♪ ♪ AH, PEOPLE ♪

HAZE IN THE MEADOW ♪ ♪ AH, PEOPLE ♪ ♪ THERE'S A BRIGHT GOLDEN HAZE

♪ AH, PEOPLE ♪ ♪ THERE'S A BRIGHT GOLDEN HAZE IN THE MEADOW ♪

♪ THERE'S A BRIGHT GOLDEN HAZE IN THE MEADOW ♪ ♪ THE CORN IS AS HIGH

IN THE MEADOW ♪ ♪ THE CORN IS AS HIGH AS AN ELEPHANT'S EYE ♪

♪ THE CORN IS AS HIGH AS AN ELEPHANT'S EYE ♪ ♪ AND IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S

AS AN ELEPHANT'S EYE ♪ ♪ AND IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S CLIMBING ♪

♪ AND IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S CLIMBING ♪ ♪ CLEAR UP TO THE SKY ♪

CLIMBING ♪ ♪ CLEAR UP TO THE SKY ♪ ♪ WELL ♪

♪ CLEAR UP TO THE SKY ♪ ♪ WELL ♪ ♪ I SAY, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL

♪ WELL ♪ ♪ I SAY, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING ♪

♪ I SAY, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪

MORNING ♪ ♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ YES, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪

♪ YEAH ♪ ♪ YES, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ Y'ALL, LOOK OUT THERE.

♪ YES, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ Y'ALL, LOOK OUT THERE. ♪ I'VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELING ♪

Y'ALL, LOOK OUT THERE. ♪ I'VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELING ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING ♪

♪ I'VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELING ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOING MY WAY ♪

♪ EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOING MY WAY ♪ Y'ALL COME ON NOW.

♪ EVERYTHING GOING MY WAY ♪ Y'ALL COME ON NOW. ♪ WHOA, THE CATTLE ARE STANDING

Y'ALL COME ON NOW. ♪ WHOA, THE CATTLE ARE STANDING LIKE STATUES ♪

♪ WHOA, THE CATTLE ARE STANDING LIKE STATUES ♪ ♪ HMMM ♪

LIKE STATUES ♪ ♪ HMMM ♪ ♪ THE CATTLE ARE STANDING LIKE

♪ HMMM ♪ ♪ THE CATTLE ARE STANDING LIKE STATUES ♪

♪ THE CATTLE ARE STANDING LIKE STATUES ♪ ♪ THEY DON'T TURN THEIR HEADS

STATUES ♪ ♪ THEY DON'T TURN THEIR HEADS AS THEY SEE ME RIDE BY ♪

♪ THEY DON'T TURN THEIR HEADS AS THEY SEE ME RIDE BY ♪ ♪ BUT A LITTLE BROWN MAVERICK

AS THEY SEE ME RIDE BY ♪ ♪ BUT A LITTLE BROWN MAVERICK IS WINKIN' HER EYE ♪

♪ BUT A LITTLE BROWN MAVERICK IS WINKIN' HER EYE ♪ ♪ SHE SAID, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL

IS WINKIN' HER EYE ♪ ♪ SHE SAID, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING, YEAH ♪

♪ SHE SAID, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING, YEAH ♪ YEAH!

MORNING, YEAH ♪ YEAH! ♪ WELL, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪

YEAH! ♪ WELL, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ ♪ I WANT Y'ALL TO KNOW,

♪ WELL, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ ♪ I WANT Y'ALL TO KNOW, KNOW, KNOW ♪

♪ I WANT Y'ALL TO KNOW, KNOW, KNOW ♪ ♪ I'VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪

KNOW, KNOW ♪ ♪ I'VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪

♪ I'VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪

♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪

♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ ♪ MY WAY ♪

♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ ♪ MY WAY ♪ ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL, DO IT TO ME

♪ MY WAY ♪ ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL, DO IT TO ME NOW.

ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL, DO IT TO ME NOW. [MUSICAL INTERLUDE]

NOW. [MUSICAL INTERLUDE] OH!

[MUSICAL INTERLUDE] OH! ALL RIGHT NOW!

OH! ALL RIGHT NOW! UH-HUH.

♪ WHOA, THE SOUNDS OF THE EARTH ARE LIKE MUSIC ♪ ♪ THE SOUNDS OF THE EARTH ARE

ARE LIKE MUSIC ♪ ♪ THE SOUNDS OF THE EARTH ARE LIKE MUSIC ♪

♪ THE SOUNDS OF THE EARTH ARE LIKE MUSIC ♪ ♪ THE BREEZE IS AS BUSY ♪

LIKE MUSIC ♪ ♪ THE BREEZE IS AS BUSY ♪ ♪ IT DON'T MISS A TREE ♪

♪ THE BREEZE IS AS BUSY ♪ ♪ IT DON'T MISS A TREE ♪ ♪ AND A LITTLE OL' WEEPIN'

♪ IT DON'T MISS A TREE ♪ ♪ AND A LITTLE OL' WEEPIN' WILLOW ♪

♪ AND A LITTLE OL' WEEPIN' WILLOW ♪ ♪ IS LAUGHIN' AT ME ♪

WILLOW ♪ ♪ IS LAUGHIN' AT ME ♪ ♪ SHE SAID, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL

♪ IS LAUGHIN' AT ME ♪ ♪ SHE SAID, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING ♪

♪ SHE SAID, OH, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING ♪ ♪ YES, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪

MORNING ♪ ♪ YES, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH, I GOT A BEAUTIFUL

♪ YES, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ ♪ YEAH, I GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪

♪ YEAH, I GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪

FEELIN' ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪

♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪

♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ WHOO ♪

♪ I GOT EVERYTHING ♪ ♪ WHOO ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪

♪ WHOO ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ [CHUCKLES]

♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ [CHUCKLES] I'M SORRY.

[CHUCKLES] I'M SORRY. ♪ BUT I GOT EVERYTHING GOIN'

I'M SORRY. ♪ BUT I GOT EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪

♪ BUT I GOT EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ ♪ MY WAY ♪

MY WAY ♪ ♪ MY WAY ♪ ♪ WHOA, BABY ♪

♪ MY WAY ♪ ♪ WHOA, BABY ♪ ♪ OHH ♪

♪ WHOA, BABY ♪ ♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OH, BABY ♪

♪ OHH ♪ ♪ OH, BABY ♪ ♪ I WANNA THANK YOU, LITTLE

♪ OH, BABY ♪ ♪ I WANNA THANK YOU, LITTLE GIRL ♪

♪ I WANNA THANK YOU, LITTLE GIRL ♪ ♪ FOR SUCH A WONDERFUL DAY ♪

GIRL ♪ ♪ FOR SUCH A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ ♪ I GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪

♪ FOR SUCH A WONDERFUL DAY ♪ ♪ I GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪

♪ I GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEELIN' ♪ ♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

♪ EVERYTHING GOIN' MY WAY ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] [MUSIC ENDS]

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] [MUSIC ENDS] ALL RIGHT.

[MUSIC ENDS] ALL RIGHT. HEY, HEY, HEY.

ALL RIGHT. HEY, HEY, HEY. [INTRO TO "I CAN'T STOP LOVING

HEY, HEY, HEY. [INTRO TO "I CAN'T STOP LOVING YOU" PLAYS]

[INTRO TO "I CAN'T STOP LOVING YOU" PLAYS] ♪ I CAN'T STOP LOVING YOU ♪

[YOU" PLAYS] ♪ I CAN'T STOP LOVING YOU ♪ [Imitating Ray Charles]

♪ I CAN'T STOP LOVING YOU ♪ [Imitating Ray Charles] ♪ IT'S USELESS TO SAY ♪

[Imitating Ray Charles] ♪ IT'S USELESS TO SAY ♪ ♪ TO LIVE IN MEMORY

♪ IT'S USELESS TO SAY ♪ ♪ TO LIVE IN MEMORY OF THE LONESOME TIMES ♪

♪ TO LIVE IN MEMORY OF THE LONESOME TIMES ♪ [LAUGHTER]

OF THE LONESOME TIMES ♪ [LAUGHTER] SING THE SONG.

[LAUGHTER] SING THE SONG. ♪ I CAN'T STOP WANTING YOU ♪

SING THE SONG. ♪ I CAN'T STOP WANTING YOU ♪ ♪ I'VE MADE UP MY MIND ♪

♪ I CAN'T STOP WANTING YOU ♪ ♪ I'VE MADE UP MY MIND ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

♪ I'VE MADE UP MY MIND ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ SO I'LL JUST LIVE MY LIFE ♪

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ SO I'LL JUST LIVE MY LIFE ♪ [LAUGHTER]

♪ SO I'LL JUST LIVE MY LIFE ♪ [LAUGHTER] ♪ IN DREAMS OF YESTERDAY ♪

[LAUGHTER] ♪ IN DREAMS OF YESTERDAY ♪ [Normal voice] ALL RIGHT.

♪ IN DREAMS OF YESTERDAY ♪ [Normal voice] ALL RIGHT. YOU PICKED UP ON IT.

[Normal voice] ALL RIGHT. YOU PICKED UP ON IT. I PICKED UP ON IT.

YOU PICKED UP ON IT. I PICKED UP ON IT. I TAKE IT YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOUR

I PICKED UP ON IT. I TAKE IT YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOUR LINE.

I TAKE IT YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOUR LINE. I FORGOT.

LINE. I FORGOT. BUT YOU SOUND LIKE RAY CHARLES,

I FORGOT. BUT YOU SOUND LIKE RAY CHARLES, BUT I LOOK LIKE HIM.

BUT YOU SOUND LIKE RAY CHARLES, BUT I LOOK LIKE HIM. HI, KIDS.

BUT I LOOK LIKE HIM. HI, KIDS. OH, HI, MR. MIKE.

HI, KIDS. OH, HI, MR. MIKE. HI, MR. MIKE.

OH, HI, MR. MIKE. HI, MR. MIKE. HEY, I DON'T MEAN TO BREAK UP

HI, MR. MIKE. HEY, I DON'T MEAN TO BREAK UP THE FUN HERE, BUT WE HAVE A

HEY, I DON'T MEAN TO BREAK UP THE FUN HERE, BUT WE HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE FOR RAY.

THE FUN HERE, BUT WE HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE FOR RAY. OH, A SURPRISE. OKAY.

LITTLE SURPRISE FOR RAY. OH, A SURPRISE. OKAY. OOH, A SURPRISE.

OH, A SURPRISE. OKAY. OOH, A SURPRISE. YOU KNOW, WE KIDDED RAY A LOT

OOH, A SURPRISE. YOU KNOW, WE KIDDED RAY A LOT TONIGHT, BUT BLINDNESS IS

YOU KNOW, WE KIDDED RAY A LOT TONIGHT, BUT BLINDNESS IS NOTHING TO KID ABOUT.

TONIGHT, BUT BLINDNESS IS NOTHING TO KID ABOUT. SO, WE AT "SATURDAY NIGHT," WITH

NOTHING TO KID ABOUT. SO, WE AT "SATURDAY NIGHT," WITH THE NETWORK, SET UP SORT OF A

SO, WE AT "SATURDAY NIGHT," WITH THE NETWORK, SET UP SORT OF A MATCHING FUND.

THE NETWORK, SET UP SORT OF A MATCHING FUND. AND WE WERE ABLE TO PURCHASE

MATCHING FUND. AND WE WERE ABLE TO PURCHASE THIS LOVELY PAINTING IN

AND WE WERE ABLE TO PURCHASE THIS LOVELY PAINTING IN APPRECIATION OF RAY CHARLES AND

THIS LOVELY PAINTING IN APPRECIATION OF RAY CHARLES AND THE COURAGEOUS EXAMPLE HE SETS

APPRECIATION OF RAY CHARLES AND THE COURAGEOUS EXAMPLE HE SETS FOR ALL OF US, BESIDES BEING ON

THE COURAGEOUS EXAMPLE HE SETS FOR ALL OF US, BESIDES BEING ON HECK OF A GOOD SPORT.

FOR ALL OF US, BESIDES BEING ON HECK OF A GOOD SPORT. AND SO, IN RAY'S NAME, WE'RE

HECK OF A GOOD SPORT. AND SO, IN RAY'S NAME, WE'RE DONATING THIS PAINTING TO THE

AND SO, IN RAY'S NAME, WE'RE DONATING THIS PAINTING TO THE LIGHTHOUSE OF THE BLIND IN THE

DONATING THIS PAINTING TO THE LIGHTHOUSE OF THE BLIND IN THE HOPE THAT, SOMEDAY, ALL WILL BE

LIGHTHOUSE OF THE BLIND IN THE HOPE THAT, SOMEDAY, ALL WILL BE ABLE TO SEE IT.

HOPE THAT, SOMEDAY, ALL WILL BE ABLE TO SEE IT. LET ME JUST PULL THE STRING HERE

ABLE TO SEE IT. LET ME JUST PULL THE STRING HERE AND GIVE YOU A LOOK AT WHAT I'M

LET ME JUST PULL THE STRING HERE AND GIVE YOU A LOOK AT WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

AND GIVE YOU A LOOK AT WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. IT WAS PAINTED IN 1909 BY THE

TALKING ABOUT. IT WAS PAINTED IN 1909 BY THE FRENCH IMPRESSIONIST

IT WAS PAINTED IN 1909 BY THE FRENCH IMPRESSIONIST CLAUDE MONET, AND IT'S ENTITLED,

FRENCH IMPRESSIONIST CLAUDE MONET, AND IT'S ENTITLED, AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY GUESSED,

CLAUDE MONET, AND IT'S ENTITLED, AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY GUESSED, "THE OLD WINDMILL."

AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY GUESSED, "THE OLD WINDMILL." THERE'S THAT SHIMMERING

"THE OLD WINDMILL." THERE'S THAT SHIMMERING IRIDESCENCE, THE SUBTLE

THERE'S THAT SHIMMERING IRIDESCENCE, THE SUBTLE INTERPLAY BETWEEN LIGHT AND

IRIDESCENCE, THE SUBTLE INTERPLAY BETWEEN LIGHT AND SHADOW THAT MONET WAS FAMOUS

INTERPLAY BETWEEN LIGHT AND SHADOW THAT MONET WAS FAMOUS FOR.

SHADOW THAT MONET WAS FAMOUS FOR. HARD TO DESCRIBE, REALLY.

FOR. HARD TO DESCRIBE, REALLY. YOU SORT OF HAVE TO SEE IT.

HARD TO DESCRIBE, REALLY. YOU SORT OF HAVE TO SEE IT. RAY, I'M SURE THERE'S SOMETHING

YOU SORT OF HAVE TO SEE IT. RAY, I'M SURE THERE'S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SAY.

RAY, I'M SURE THERE'S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SAY. WELL, I WOULD LIKE TO SAY

YOU WANT TO SAY. WELL, I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT OUT OF ALL THE AWARDS THAT

WELL, I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT OUT OF ALL THE AWARDS THAT I RECEIVED, I GOT TO TELL YOU.

THAT OUT OF ALL THE AWARDS THAT I RECEIVED, I GOT TO TELL YOU. THIS ONE, WITHOUT DOUBT, MAKES

I RECEIVED, I GOT TO TELL YOU. THIS ONE, WITHOUT DOUBT, MAKES ME THAT HAPPIEST.

THIS ONE, WITHOUT DOUBT, MAKES ME THAT HAPPIEST. SO, LET ME THANK YOU, MR. MIKE,

ME THAT HAPPIEST. SO, LET ME THANK YOU, MR. MIKE, AND I ALSO WOULD LIKE TO THANK

SO, LET ME THANK YOU, MR. MIKE, AND I ALSO WOULD LIKE TO THANK ALL THE WONDERFUL PEOPLE ON

AND I ALSO WOULD LIKE TO THANK ALL THE WONDERFUL PEOPLE ON "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" WHO'VE

ALL THE WONDERFUL PEOPLE ON "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" WHO'VE MADE THIS WEEK SO MUCH FUN.

"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" WHO'VE MADE THIS WEEK SO MUCH FUN. THANK YOU.

MADE THIS WEEK SO MUCH FUN. THANK YOU. HEY, WELL SAID.

THANK YOU. HEY, WELL SAID. [APPLAUSE]

HEY, WELL SAID. [APPLAUSE] SO, RAY, I'M SORRY.

[APPLAUSE] SO, RAY, I'M SORRY. I GOT TO RUN.

SO, RAY, I'M SORRY. I GOT TO RUN. I'LL SEE YOU LATER AT THE PARTY,

I GOT TO RUN. I'LL SEE YOU LATER AT THE PARTY, PAL.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER AT THE PARTY, PAL. OKAY, SEE YOU, MR. MIKE.

PAL. OKAY, SEE YOU, MR. MIKE. BYE, MR. MIKE.

OKAY, SEE YOU, MR. MIKE. BYE, MR. MIKE. BYE-BYE.

BYE, MR. MIKE. BYE-BYE. NOW, WHAT MR. MIKE DOESN'T

BYE-BYE. NOW, WHAT MR. MIKE DOESN'T KNOW IS AT THE PARTY ARE GOING

NOW, WHAT MR. MIKE DOESN'T KNOW IS AT THE PARTY ARE GOING TO BE 10 OR 12 OF THE BIGGEST

KNOW IS AT THE PARTY ARE GOING TO BE 10 OR 12 OF THE BIGGEST BLACK DUDES HE'S EVER SEEN IN

TO BE 10 OR 12 OF THE BIGGEST BLACK DUDES HE'S EVER SEEN IN HIS LIFE.

BLACK DUDES HE'S EVER SEEN IN HIS LIFE. AND THEY'RE GONNA WHUP HIM

HIS LIFE. AND THEY'RE GONNA WHUP HIM UPSIDE HIS HEAD AND BREAK EVERY

AND THEY'RE GONNA WHUP HIM UPSIDE HIS HEAD AND BREAK EVERY BONE IN HIS BODY.

UPSIDE HIS HEAD AND BREAK EVERY BONE IN HIS BODY. SO, PLEASE DON'T TELL HIM.

BONE IN HIS BODY. SO, PLEASE DON'T TELL HIM. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER THIS

SO, PLEASE DON'T TELL HIM. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER THIS NEXT FILMED MESSAGE.

I'M SO GLAD. THEY JUST TOLD ME THAT WE'VE GOT A WHOLE MINUTE LEFT, YOU KNOW?

THEY JUST TOLD ME THAT WE'VE GOT A WHOLE MINUTE LEFT, YOU KNOW? THAT'S HIGHLY UNUSUAL FOR THIS

A WHOLE MINUTE LEFT, YOU KNOW? THAT'S HIGHLY UNUSUAL FOR THIS SHOW.

THAT'S HIGHLY UNUSUAL FOR THIS SHOW. BUT THIS IS STRAIGHT AHEAD.

SHOW. BUT THIS IS STRAIGHT AHEAD. BEFORE WE GET TOO LOST HERE,

BUT THIS IS STRAIGHT AHEAD. BEFORE WE GET TOO LOST HERE, EVERYBODY THAT'S AROUND ME, I

BEFORE WE GET TOO LOST HERE, EVERYBODY THAT'S AROUND ME, I REALLY WANT TO SAY, TRULY,

EVERYBODY THAT'S AROUND ME, I REALLY WANT TO SAY, TRULY, THANKS TO ALL OF YOU PEOPLE.

REALLY WANT TO SAY, TRULY, THANKS TO ALL OF YOU PEOPLE. AND WOULD YOU ALL JUST SAY A

THANKS TO ALL OF YOU PEOPLE. AND WOULD YOU ALL JUST SAY A NICE "THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT"?

AND WOULD YOU ALL JUST SAY A NICE "THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT"? AND THEN WHAT I WANT TO DO IS

NICE "THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT"? AND THEN WHAT I WANT TO DO IS JUST SORT OF GET INTO... CAN WE

AND THEN WHAT I WANT TO DO IS JUST SORT OF GET INTO... CAN WE JUST CLOSE WITH A LITTLE

JUST SORT OF GET INTO... CAN WE JUST CLOSE WITH A LITTLE SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE LIVELY

JUST CLOSE WITH A LITTLE SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE LIVELY THAN THE BAND AND JUST LET THEM

SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE LIVELY THAN THE BAND AND JUST LET THEM SORT OF FOLLOW US, LIKE...

THAN THE BAND AND JUST LET THEM SORT OF FOLLOW US, LIKE... [PIANO PLAYS UPBEAT MUSIC]

SORT OF FOLLOW US, LIKE... [PIANO PLAYS UPBEAT MUSIC] [SCATTING]

♪ HERE ON "SATURDAY NIGHT" ♪

♪ ON "SATURDAY NIGHT" ♪

[SCATTING]

♪ ON "SATURDAY NIGHT" ♪

♪ YEAH, WE GONNA KEEP ON

SWINGIN', YEAH... ♪

Announcer: MR. MIKE IS PLAYED

BY MICHAEL O'DONOGHUE.

NEXT "SATURDAY NIGHT," OUR HOST

WILL BE BUCK HENRY WITH MUSICAL

GUEST LEON REDBONE AND THE FIVE

FINALISTS IN THE

"ANYONE CAN HOST" CONTEST.

BOY, I HOPE THEY DON'T HAVE AN

"ANYONE CAN ANNOUNCE" CONTEST.

NAH, THEY WOULDN'T DO THAT TO

ME.

THIS IS DON PARDO SAYING GOOD

NIGHT... ANYONE.

♪ ...WANNA HAVE A LITTLE FUN,

Y'ALL ♪

♪ ON SATURDAY NIGHT ♪

♪ THAT'S WHERE IT ALL BEGUN,

Y'ALL ♪

♪ ON SATURDAY NIGHT ♪

TELL ME!

♪ WANNA HAVE A LITTLE FUN,

Y'ALL ♪

♪ ON SATURDAY NIGHT ♪

♪ THAT'S WHERE IT ALL BEGUN,

Y'ALL... ♪