Original subtitles

Gah!

Oh, my paper.

Oh, ooh.

Ah. Ha ha.

[Mrs Wicket] Right.

Ooh. Ah. Morning. There we are.

Right, thank you.

Phew.

[owoooah]

[blows raspberry]

Ha, ooh. Ah. Right. Oh, what's the news?

What the...

[chuckling]

Ah.

Hm.

Oh. Brilliant.

Ah. One, please.

Okay, where would you like to sit?

Oh. Hm. Hm.

Umm, oh, oh, oh.

[Ticket Girl] Oh!

[laughs]

Ah, hm, no.

Couldn't go there.

Um, um, um, um.

Okay.

Hm. Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.

There you go, sir.

Ah, thank you.

Oh. Ah.

Just there, sir.

Ah.

Ah, yes.

-Sorry. So sorry. -Oh.

I'm so sorry. Excuse me, thank you, thank you.

Excuse me. Thank you. Ah.

Oh, very nice, hm.

Hm.

Ah.

What? Oh, tch. I mean, would you believe it?

Oh. It's just my luck.

Oh, I wonder?

Hah,

thank you, excuse me,

thank you, I'm so sorry, thank you.

Sorry, excuse me. Thank you.

Ow, oh.

Can I have one please?

Yes, sir.

Thank you. And another one.

Of course, sir.

And another one.

And another one, please.

Oh, you know what? I'll just take the lot.

Oh.

Thank you, thank you very much.

Thank you.

Hm.

Excuse me, excuse me, thank you.

Oh, that's more like it.

Um,

oh, oh. Oh.

Lady: [mumbles]

Ahh!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

please welcome to the stage... Doctor Daze. [applause]

Brilliant!

Hello, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.

Lovely to be here. I need a volunteer.

Oh, not me, not me.

Come up on stage.

Ladies and Gentlemen, give him a round of applause. [applause]

Take a seat, sir.

Watch.

And in three, two, one...

He's under.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm going to pretend to be a mouse.

-Squeak, squeak. -Uh! Uh! Uh!

Ah, a mouse. [laughter]

Oh, no, oh, ah.

-[audience laugh] -Fantastic.

Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak.

Oh, ah. Ha ha ha. Ah ah.

And in three, two, one...

You're back in the room.

Hm, oh, oh, oh. [laughter] What happened? Oh.

Well done, sir.

Give him a round of applause, ladies and gentlemen.

[applause]

Another volunteer.

Yes, please. Me, me, me, me, me! Oh, choose me, choose me!

Yes, you, sir.

Oh, yes. [giggles]

-Excuse me, sorry. -Oh, that's better.

[applause] Oh. Gracious.

Hello.

[laughs] Welcome. Take a seat.

Oh.

Now, watch.

In three, two, one...

He's out.

Now, I wonder if this man can dance.

Some music.

Oh.

[laughter] [clapping]

Hello? Ooh!

You see, ladies and gentlemen, nothing there.

I think it's time for some love.

Oh. Oh!

Oh.

Give me those.

-My darling. -[laughter]

Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah!

[laughter]

And now...

Walkies!

Ah, woof, woof!

Sit!

Look at him, ladies and gentlemen.

[applause]

[barking]

Down, boy. Ooh!

Let go. Ha ha ha.

Let go. Ooh, oh.

Woof, woof, woof.

Wait! Stay!

Come back.

Where did he go?

[growling]

Woof!

[yowling]

[barking]

Hey?

What the...

Ooh. Ooh, my poor back.

[barking]

Eh?

[yowling]

Ooh.

Bean?

[barking]

Bean, leave him alone!

[barking]

[growling]

Hey!

What's going on?

Ooh.

What? Oh. Ah, ooh.

Oh, oh, me back. Oof.

Hold on.

I think that's done it.

Oh. Whoo!

Eh?

Cor.

Hey, keep it down!

Whoo. Ha, ha, ha, ooh!

Oi, shut up! [groans]

Whoo, whoo. Ha ha ha ha. [doorbell]

Who's that? Oh, gosh!

Keep your racket down, you!

[sniffing]

Oh. [sniffing]

Oh, my darling!

Don't go. Don't go!

Where's he gone?

[Mr Bean] Come with me, please.

Ah!

You're the only one for me.

Ah! Put me down. Stop it. Ah, get off.

Three, two one...

You're back.

Oh, eh? What the... But, but, but I, I, I...

oh, thanks.

Oh, it's you, off the telly.

Yes, that's me.

I hypnotised him.

Oh.

Hypnotised him. Just a minute.

Now... [whispering]

Ah. Why not?

[yawns] Ah! Mm.

Ah, the paper. Hm mm.

Oh, woof!

[panting and barking]

[barking]

Oh, wow.

[barking]

Oh.

Good boy, Bean.

Eh?

Ha ha ha ha.

What happened? What happened?