Original subtitles

Xandra: From the beginning of time,

a war has raged between light and dark.

This eternal conflict

has flared across mystic battlefields all over the universe

and is recorded in a magical golden atlas.

The pages of the atlas hold histories of monsters and heroes

who clashed in fierce combat

in a seemingly unending struggle.

But just when things were at their darkest,

a new light appeared,

and it all started with The Three Caballeros.

Come on, boys. Attack!

(laughing)

(Donald yells)

(grunting) On guard! Take that, you beast!

(growls)

Panchito: Yahoo!

(clucking)

(growls)

(grunts)

Whoa!

(both grunt)

(growls)

(all yelling)

(groaning)

-Huh? -(Panchito and José gasp)

-(growls) -(thunder cracks)

Xandra: Wait!

Okay. This probably makes no sense.

Let's start the story at the beginning.

(birds chirping)

-(bicycle bell rings) -Happy birthday, Mr. Duck!

Thanks, Mr. Paperboy!

(humming "Happy Birthday")

(humming continues)

Happy birthday, handsome!

Right back at ya.

Wink.

(grunts)

Donald: And a cherry on top.

(slurps)

-(telephone rings) -Wha...

-Hello? -Happy birthday, handsome.

-Daisy! -(heart thumps)

I'm here at the downtown bus station, ready for you to come get me,

so we can spend your birthday together.

You got it, toots!

And hurry!

This place is a little sketchy.

(siren wails)

I'll be right there.

After a little breakfast!

-(telephone rings) -Huh?

I'm coming, Daisy!

Mr. Macklemore: Donald! Where are you?

(stammers) Mr. Macklemore.

You're late for work, again!

But it's my birthday!

I thought I had the day off.

Day off?

I got a line of shaggy toddlers around the block and no barber!

Get down here this instant or you're fired!

(telephone rings)

And one more thing!

Happy birthday.

(inhales, blows)

(door opens, closes)

(tea kettle whistling)

(babbling)

Aw, phooey.

(grunts)

Hello, ma'am.

-(horn honks) -Hey!

Coming through!

(panting)

What? (gasps)

Yeah. Next!

Yeah. Next!

Next!

(sighs)

-(grunts) -Huh?

(grunting)

Why, you little...

If you behave, you'll get a lolly.

I hate lollipops!

(growling) That's it!

-(Donald babbling) -(thuds)

(blows raspberry)

Ha!

(gasps)

(whimpers) Mama!

Oh, calling for your mama.

I'm so scared.

(stomping)

(growling)

Uh-oh.

Today is school picture day, you horrible man!

Don't worry. I'll fix it.

Ta-da!

Ooh!

(sighs)

(sniffles)

(sneezes)

(growling)

(roaring)

(growls)

(blows raspberry)

-(clattering) -(Donald shouting)

(grunts)

You've snipped your last whippersnapper!

You're fired!

And happy birthday.

Wha...

(humming "Happy Birthday" sadly)

(siren wailing)

(tires screeching)

(ominous music)

My house!

firemen: Hop. Hop. Hop.

firemen: Hop. Hop. Hop.

My fine china!

Hop. Hop. Hop.

My parents!

announcer 1 on tv: The Roman tuber--

announcer 2 on tv: Super excited monkey monster truck...

firemen: Hop. Hop. Hop.

Not my TV, too!

What happened?

fireman 1: Uh, look, Chief.

Someone must have left the tea kettle on the stove.

(firemen laughing)

fireman 2: What an idiot!

(grumbles)

(steam whistling)

This is all your fault!

Happy birthday!

Wink.

(shouting)

-(Donald blabbering) -(clattering)

-(telephone ringing) -Hmm?

Hello? Well, yeah. I'll... I'll check.

Is there a Donald Duck here?

(panting)

I'm Donald Duck.

It's for you.

Hello?

(Daisy shouting indistinctly)

Daisy! Uh, I'm on my way.

Don't even bother, Donald. You are too late!

But Daisy, what happened was...

You've always got excuses, and I have had it!

But, Daisy--

No more "But Daisies."

Clearly, you don't care about anyone but yourself.

Why don't you call me when you get your life together?

Happy birthday, Donald Duck!

(wind howls)

(fireman 3 whistles)

I've been a fireman for 35 years and I ain't never seen a burn like that.

Well, time to get back home

to our intact houses and significant others.

Aw.

(somber music)

Aw, Daisy.

(tires screeching)

Aw.

Happy birthday, Donald Duck.

postman: Wait!

Special delivery for Donald Duck.

Hey, that's me.

Oh good.

Yeah.

(whistling)

Debbie: Dear Mr. Duck,

on this, the blessed event of your birthday,

your great-grandfather, Clinton Coot,

has left you a sizable inheritance.

(blubbers) What? Inheritance?

Oh, boy! Has this day turned around!

(whistles) Taxi!

(tires screeching)

Where to, mack?

Take me to 122 Sheldgoose Square.

-And step on it! -Buckle up.

(tires screeching)

(yelling)

You're still fired!

-Donald: Watch out! -(horn honks)

Slow down! (blubbers)

- Look where you're going! -(woman screams)

(horns honking)

(upbeat music)

(tires screeching)

Donald: Wow.

Ooh!

Amazing!

(tires screech)

Hey, I'm rich!

Well, then, how's about a tip?

Okay. Call your mother sometime.

Hey!

That's a great tip. Thanks.

-(telephone beeping) -Hello, Ma.

driver: I just called to say I love you.

(thunder crashes)

Oh, boy, oh, boy.

This place has everything.

(echoing) Everything, everything.

(stomach grumbling)

(grumbling echoes)

I hope there's food.

-(clattering) -(Donald humming)

(chuckles)

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Phew.

I'm gonna eat my sandwich.

Donald: Ooh. Yum, yum, yum.

-This is good stuff. -Hmm?

-Hmm. -(Donald chomping)

(growls)

(gulps, sighs)

Excuse me? (coughs)

-You're excused. -(growls)

-(plate shatters) -Who do you think you are?

Your boss, see.

Hmm... (muttering).

(gasps) Why, you boiled brain buffoon.

This is 122 Sheldgoose Square.

I know. I live here.

You live next door

at 122 and 1/8th.

Uh-oh.

(gulps) Uh, hello!

I'm Donald Duck.

(grunting)

Listen, you common, commoner!

Ooh!

I am Baron von Sheldgoose,

president of the New Quackmore Institute.

(gasps)

And you, sir, are trespassing on my property.

(jingling)

(guards growling)

Now, now, let's be civilized.

Uh-oh.

(Donald babbling)

(yells) What's the big idea?

Don't forget to write. (chuckles)

(grunting)

Doggone security.

Huh?

Well, this isn't so bad.

(engine starts)

Huh?

What?

Well, it ain't much, but it's all mine.

Debbie: Mr. Duck, I presume.

Yeah?

I am the executor of your great-grandfather's estate.

Will the others be joining us?

Others?

-(horn honking) -(bus approaching)

(grunting)

Thank you, my friend. (grunts)

And do not worry.

I promise to pay you back at my earliest convenience.

women: Bye, José.

Ciao , bellas.

woman 1: I love you!

José Carioca at your service.

(smooches)

Ooh! How exotic.

All right. Break it up. What are you doing here?

I've come to claim my inheritance,

which is most fortuitous,

as my personal finances expired roughly 20 miles ago.

Huh?

I am broke, but do not worry for me, my friend.

For what is money when fortune has smiled upon the two of us.

The two of us?

Actually, there's three of you.

Three?

Panchito: Yahoo...

Ooh...

Ooh...

Ooh...

(thuds)

Wow. That tour guide was right!

It is more of a rush to wait

until after you land to open the parachute.

Hola, amigos!

Yo soy Panchito Romero Miguel Francisco Quintero González III.

But my friends call me Panchito.

You guys got an inheritance too?

-Who are these guys? -I already told you.

Yo soy Panchito Romero Miguel Francisco Quintero González III.

But your friends call you Panchito.

Hey, he gets it!

-(growls) - Que rico!

I just got two new best friends, a miserable rundown shack,

and a sleazy lawyer!

Who wouldn't love all of this?

Me!

(Debbie clears throat) If we're all quite through,

allow me to do my job and read the will.

"I, Clinton Coot, bequeath my museum collection

and explorer's cabana to my great-grandson, Donald Duck,

and the other direct descendants of the Three Caballeros."

all: The three caba-what-os?

Ca-ba-lle-ros.

Just a minute.

I got to share with these weirdos?

I beg your pardon. I am no weirdo.

I am eccentric.

And I am Panchito.

Hmm.

Gentlemen, welcome to the New Quackmore Institute.

Ta-da!

(screams)

(babbling)

What is that?

That's Ari.

Ari!

The caretaker of your cabana.

(babbling)

(thudding)

Whoo-hoo!

(jabbers)

(screams)

And he can't be fired.

So we must pay this good fellow?

Forever?

No. Just as long as you live.

(babbles)

And now, gentlemen,

having spent the remaining vestiges of my retainer,

I'm outta here!

Debbie: So long, suckers! (cackles)

(screams)

Hey, quit shoving.

(ominous music)

What a dump.

(yells)

But it is our dump.

(yelps)

And it's full of cool stuff.

Hey, ho. Hoo, ho. Hey, ho. Hoo, hey.

(grunting)

Oh.

My friends, I feel we have stumbled into something very special here.

Ooh.

Are you're thinking what I'm thinking?

I think so.

all: Yard sale!

(jabbering)

Hand out flyers to everyone you see.

all: Yard sale!

Priceless objects at discount prices.

Low, low prices.

Hey, hey. Cheap, cheap, cheap!

(car door opens, closes)

all: We're here, Donald.

So...

Well, it's about time!

But, Donald, you just called us.

And we had to come all the way from Aunt Daisy's.

Excuses, excuses!

We need to move this trash and make some cash.

April, dust this off and give it to May.

I'm May.

May, tag it and give it to June.

I'm June!

June, sell it, and give the cash to me.

I'm April.

Um, by the way, how is your Aunt Daisy?

all: She says you're a dirty, rotten, no-good liar.

(sighs) Fair enough.

Buy some stuff at the yard sale.

-José: Right here, right now. -Panchito: Sale! Sale! Sale!

Well, good afternoon, my little silver spoons.

(humming)

(exhales)

What is going on?

(yells)

(growls)

Yard sale?

(grumbling)

(Sheldgoose muttering) Sheldgoose: I'll give them a piece...

When I get my hands on them...

(muttering)

(stammers)

I thought I... No, okay.

(muttering)

I'll give them a p--

all: Yard sale!

-Huh? -(panting)

A yard sale?

Amazing idea, yes.

People here have tremendous amounts of cash.

And we have tremendous amounts of yard.

You are in violation of New Quackmore etiquette.

If you do not stop this instant...

(gasps)

...you will be ejected from the Institute!

Aw, come on. Is this about the sandwich?

What? Sandwich? No.

It is about decades of tradition that you are stamping upon with your...

With your... (stammering)

With your...

-With our what? -Our feet?

Feet are traditionally used for stamping.

(chuckling) I'm sorry. Donald, is it?

I think we got off on the wrong webbed foot.

How about I take all this old junk off your hands right now?

Why, I'll even buy your old rundown cabana, too!

I did not see that coming.

Plot twist.

Does one million sound fair?

-(all babbling) -(bell dings)

By the way, you didn't happen to run across a leather-bound,

jewel-encrusted book with gold inlay,

as though it were crafted by magic, forged from stardust,

and published by the gods themselves?

(snickers)

Or something like that?

I am sure it is in there somewhere.

We'll find it!

Stay right there and don't move.

Aha! Sorry. I thought you moved.

all: We got a million dollars! We got a million dollars!

We got a... What?

Wait. We may not have anything if we do not find that book.

He's right. Split up.

Nah. Ha!

(Panchito whistling)

What?

Hmm.

Ah.

(gasps)

Ooh.

(squeaks)

Hey, guys!

-You'll never guess what I found! -The book?

No.

A book that could be the book.

Hilarious.

(grunts)

Huh? What's so great about this book?

(muttering)

Please, please. Allow me.

Oh, Ari!

Whoo-hoo!

My friend, your door maintenance skills are the stuff of legend.

Could you apply the same expertise to a book lock?

(babbling)

Nice job!

(babbles)

(all gasp)

all: Huh?

(all grunt)

(whimpers)

(all scream)

Ooh.

(shouts)

(all gasp)

Say your prayers, mortals!

all: Gulp!

(closing theme music)