Original subtitles

- [kung fu grunts]

- AND NOW...

DREAMWORKS' KUNG FU PANDA: LEGENDS OF AWESOMENESS.

- * HEAR THE LEGENDS OF THE KUNG FU PANDA *

[scats]

* RAISED IN A NOODLE SHOP *

* NEVER SEEKING GLORY OR FAME *

* HE CLIMBED THE MOUNTAINTOP *

* AND EARNED THE DRAGON WARRIOR NAME *

[martial arts grunts] * KUNG FU PANDA

[scats]

* MASTER SHIFU SAW THE WARRIOR BLOSSOM *

* AND MASTER THE SKILLS OF BODACIOUS AND AWESOME *

* KUNG FU PANDA

[scats]

* HE LIVES AND HE TRAINS *

* AND HE FIGHTS WITH THE FURIOUS FIVE *

* PROTECT THE VALLEY SOMETHIN' SOMETHIN' *

* SOMETHIN' SOMETHIN' ALIVE

[fighting grunts]

* KUNG FU PANDA

* LEGENDS OF AWESOMENESS SWEET!

- YOU SEE, GUYS, THE KEY TO PICKING A LOCK

IS A WILL OF IRON AND A STEADY...

AH, DARN IT, I DROPPED THE...

CAN YOU JUST-- JUST PICK IT UP.

JUST GIVE IT!

GOL, ABOUT TIME.

ANYWAY, AS I WAS SAYING...CLICK!

[all murmuring approval]

- I KNOW, JUST LIKE THAT, IT'S OPEN.

[grunts]

[grunting]

WELL, IF YOU'D HOLD THE LIGHT WHERE I COULD SEE--AAH!

OW! DARN IT!

WHY CAN'T YOU JUST--OOF!

- IF YOU GUYS WANT SOME NOODLES,

IT'S BEST TO STOP BY DURING BUSINESS HOURS.

- [spits]

- OH, ARE YOU KIDDING?

GARY!

- I'M JUST AT THE PART WHERE THE MILKMAID

FALLS IN LOVE WITH THE STABLE BOY.

- WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT MILKMAIDS.

WE'RE TALKING ABOUT YOU BOTCHING LOOKOUT DUTY.

LOOK!

SEE? HIM.

- 'SUP?

- DARN IT, GARY.

LOOK, THIS JOB IS TOUGH ENOUGH WITHOUT--

- TRYING TO PICK A LOCK WHEN THE KEY IS UNDER THE MAT?

- UH, HATE TO INTERRUPT-- - NO, HANG ON, GUY.

LISTEN, YOU KNOW WHAT, GARY? I'M SICK AND TIRED

OF YOUR KNOW-IT-ALL ATTITUDE, AND YOUR FANCY WORDS,

AND YOUR BOOK-READING... WITH YOUR EYES!

YOU'RE THE WORST CROC BANDIT EVER.

[all gasping]

- YEAH... [chuckles]

YOU GUYS HAVE A LOT TO TALK ABOUT, SO...

- NO, NO, DON'T GO.

I WANT YOU ALL TO HEAR THIS.

- OH, YEAH? - FUNG...

I AM TIRED OF YOUR INSULTS. - OH.

- YOUR INSENSITIVITY-- - OOH.

- WHAT'S UP WITH THAT? - OH.

- AND YOUR CONSTANT MISPRONUNCIATION OF MY NAME.

- WHAT? - IT'S "GAH-RI."

- "GAH-RI"! - OH, YEAH, GAH-RI?

WELL, I THINK I HAVE A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM.

- ME TOO. I QUIT. - YOU'RE FIRED.

- I QUIT. - YOU'RE FIRED.

- NO, NO, I QUIT. - YOU CAN'T QUIT,

'CAUSE YOU'RE FIRED. - I'M FIRED?

NO, YOU'RE FIRED. - NO--HOW AM I FIRED?

I'M THE LEADER.

- UM...I'M GONNA GO AHEAD AND FIGHT YOU NOW.

- HUH? OH! OH, GOSH--

I'M SORRY, GUY, SURE.

EVERYONE BUT GARY... ATTACK!

OOF!

[fighting sounds]

ARGH--HUH?

- OOPS.

- WHAT?

- [kung fu grunts]

- OW!

EVERYONE BUT GARY... RETREAT!

- HEY, THANKS FOR THE-- - [sobs]

[sobbing]

- WHY DON'T WE ALL GO INSIDE FOR A--A NICE CUP OF TEA?

- I WISH I COULD.

BUT DON'T LET ME STOP YOU TWO FROM, UH, YOU KNOW...

- WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

YOU CAN'T JUST STICK ME WITH A SOBBING CROCODILE.

- SORRY, DAD, I-I GOT MIDNIGHT PATROL.

IT'S IMPORTANT, YOU KNOW, I'M, UH--

- DRAGON WARRIOR, I KNOW, I KNOW.

MR. BIG PANTS ALWAYS GOT SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO DO.

- THANKS FOR YOUR UNDERSTANDING.

UH, GOOD TO SEE YOU, GAH-RI.

- [blubbers]

- YOU TOO.

UH, BYE, DAD!

- [sighs] - [blubbering]

- [scats]

TWO, THREE... [scatting]

DAD! DAD--

GAH-RI?

DAD, WHAT'S GAH-RI DOING BACK HERE?

- BACK? HE NEVER LEFT.

- YOU CAN BE HONEST, DESPITE MY OBVIOUSLY FRAGILE STATE.

- YOU'RE LETTING HIM MAKE SOUP?

IN YOUR KITCHEN?

WITH YOUR GOOD LADLE?

YOU NEVER EVEN LET ME TOUCH IT.

- [gulps]

IT'S FANTASTIC.

YOU'RE A NATURAL, GAH-RI. A NATURAL.

HE HAS BROTH IN HIS BLOOD, NOODLES IN HIS SOUL.

- I'LL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT.

HIT ME.

[slurps]

MMM...MMM!

[satisfied moans]

[moaning]

[moaning continues]

[sighs]

NEEDS SALT.

- OH, GOOD TIP.

I'M ALWAYS UP FOR CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM.

NOT LIKE THE ABUSE I TOOK FROM FUNG.

[sniffles]

- IT'S OKAY.

WHY DON'T YOU GO TAKE A BREAK [chuckles],

AND GO WAIT ON SOME TABLES?

- THANKS, MR. PING.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT YOU.

- OH, GAH-RI.

- DAD, WHY ARE YOU LETTING HIM HANG OUT WITH YOU?

HE'S A CROC BANDIT.

- WAS. ONCE UPON A TIME.

- ONCE UPON A TIME YESTERDAY!

NOW YOU'RE LETTING HIM TOUCH YOUR LADLE.

- GAH-RI IS A CHANGED CROC, PO.

AND YOU SEEMED FINE ENOUGH TO LEAVE ME ALONE

WITH HIM LAST NIGHT SO YOU COULD GO OFF DRAGON WARRIORING.

- OH, WELL, HE WAS UPSET,

SO I-I DIDN'T THINK THAT HE WAS...FINE.

BUT DON'T THINK I WON'T BE KEEPING MY EYE ON HIM,

'CAUSE I WILL. BOTH OF 'EM.

AFTER I HAVE A LITTLE--OW!

- [sips]

- I'M SO GLAD YOU ENJOYED YOUR MEAL.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF THERE'S ANYTHING,

ANYTHING AT ALL, I CAN GET YOU TWO LOVELY LADIES.

- [giggles]

WELL, COULD YOU RECOMMEND A DESSERT?

- OH, YOU KNOW WHAT'S AWESOME IS THE--

- I WAS TALKING TO GAH-RI.

- OH. SORRY.

- I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THE COCONUT BALLS.

- OH, BUT MY WAISTLINE.

- MRS. YOON, IF I MAY BE SO BOLD,

YOU LOOK SVELTELY RAVISHING.

I'LL BRING YOU TWO ORDERS.

IT'LL JUST BE BETWEEN US.

- [giggles] OH, YOU.

- THAT'S THE MOST EXPENSIVE ITEM ON THE MENU,

AND HE'S ALREADY SOLD FIVE TODAY.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I EVER GOT ALONG WITHOUT HIM.

- GREAT.

[gasps] DAD! DAD!

- WHAT, PO? WHAT'S WRONG?

- WHAT HAPPENED TO MY ROOM?

- OH, GAH-RI DID A LITTLE REARRANGING

WHEN HE MOVED IN. [chuckles]

I THINK IT LOOKS BETTER.

HAS A NICE FLOW.

- GAH-RI MOVED INTO MY ROOM?

- UH, SON, YOU LIVE AT THE JADE PALACE NOW.

I DIDN'T THINK YOU WOULD MIND--

- WHERE ARE MY ACTION FIGURES?

WOW.

GUY CAN REALLY WRAP.

AND FOLD.

AND BRAID.

WELL, THIS IS FINE. I GUESS.

- GAH-RI'S REALLY TURNED HIS LIFE AROUND.

- YEAH, HE HASN'T STOLEN ANYTHING

IN A WHOLE WEEK.

REAL IMPRESSIVE.

- I'M GLAD YOU LIKE GAH-RI TOO, PO...

BECAUSE THERE'S SOMETHING I WANT TO TELL YOU.

I'M ADOPTING HIM.

- AAH!

- [sings]

- DAD?

DAD!

- [warbles]

- DAD, CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS?

- UH, PO, WE'LL HAVE TO DO IT LATER.

SINCE YOUR NEW BROTHER GOT HERE,

I CAN'T KEEP UP WITH THE NEW CUSTOMERS.

- HERE, LET ME HELP YOU WITH THESE...DAD.

- OH, PO, YOU KNOW THAT I--

- SORRY TO INTERRUPT,

BUT IF WE DON'T CLEAR THESE TABLES,

WE'LL NEVER BE READY FOR THE DINNER RUSH.

- HE'S SUCH A HARD WORKER.

- OKAY, LISTEN UP, GUYS.

THAT INGRATE GARY IS GONE,

SO I'M GONNA NEED A NEW SECOND-IN-COMMAND.

THAT'S THE NUMBER-TWO GUY.

ALL RIGHT? SO HERE'S WHAT--

- UM...WHAT'S AN INGRATE?

- OKAY, ALL RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE... UM, OKAY...

IT'S LIKE SOMEONE WHO'S UNGRATEFUL.

ALL RIGHT? THERE YOU GO.

SO WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR IN THE--

- WOULDN'T THAT BE AN UN-GRATE?

- ANYWAYS.

I'VE, LIKE, DESIGNED SOME SCENARIOS

TO TEST YOU GUYS' REACTIONS UNDER PRESSURE,

SO...

SCENARIO!

ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE COMING OUT OF A STORE.

YOU JUST ROBBED IT, RIGHT?

WHEN YOU SEE TWO FIGURES IN THE MOONLIGHT.

WHO DO YOU ATTACK?

OKAY, YOU ONLY HAVE A SPLIT-SECOND--

- AAH!

- QUIT IT! KNOCK IT OFF!

OW!

GAH! DARN IT, GUYS.

YOU KNOW WHAT? JUST FORGET IT.

JUST TAKE FIVE.

- YOU WANT US TO PUNCH YOU FIVE MORE TIMES?

- OOH. COME HERE.

- WHAT?

- JUST...HAND ME THAT.

- YOU WANT THE HELMET.

- YES. THANKS.

- HERE YOU GO.

- NO, I DON'T MEAN HIT ME FIVE MORE TIMES!

I MEAN TAKE A BREAK! GOL!

OW! - OW!

- PO?

[both grunting]

[both growling]

- [sighs]

[both groaning]

- CALL IT A DRAW?

- DRAW.

- SO...

MISSING YOUR BUDDY?

- NO.

IN FACT, I'M FINDING A REPLACEMENT FOR HIM RIGHT NOW.

- REALLY? HOW'S THAT GOING?

[metal crashing] - GET IT OFF ME!

GET IT OFF ME!

- AW, WHO AM I KIDDING? GAH-RI WAS THE BEST.

HE WAS MY NUMBER-TWO.

I JUST LET HIM WALK AWAY, JUST WALK AWAY.

HE WAS, LIKE, THE BEST BANDIT EVER.

[laughs]

I REMEMBER THIS ONE TIME WHEN THIS THING HAPPENED.

HA, THAT WAS GREAT.

AND THIS OTHER ONE TIME,

THERE WAS THIS WHOLE OTHER THING.

[laughs] OH, MAN.

I NEVER THOUGHT I'D LIVE THAT ONE DOWN.

WHOO! HA, HA...

- YOU KNOW I CAN'T SEE

WHAT'S GOING ON IN YOUR HEAD, RIGHT?

- DO I--DUH!

OF COURSE I KNOW THAT. [snorts] GAH!

LIKE, WHO WOULDN'T KNOW SOMETHING LIKE THAT?

LIKE, EVERYONE KNOWS THAT.

EVEN BABIES KNOW THAT.

OH, WHAT'S IT MATTER NOW?

GAH-RI'S PROBABLY ALREADY GOT A NEW GANG.

IT'S ALL AWESOME AND STUFF,

AND, LIKE, THEY'RE TOTALLY DOING EVERYTHING.

- ACTUALLY, HE'S JUST WORKING FOR MY DAD

AT THE NOODLE SHOP.

- YOU DON'T MEAN... - YEAH.

HE'S EARNING AN HONEST LIVING.

AND WHAT'S WORSE? MY DAD...

WANTS TO ADOPT HIM.

- WHAT?

I-I JUST-- I THINK--OH...

- YOU, UH, OKAY OVER THERE?

[sniffles]

- UH, NO PROBLEM.

IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW, UH...EYE SWEAT, YOU KNOW?

- RIGHT. YEAH, TOTALLY. [sniffling]

- PROBABLY WON'T BE LONG BEFORE THEY BOTH FORGET US.

- [sighs] YOU'RE RIGHT.

WE GOTTA DO SOMETHING.

- YEAH!

WHAT?

- SOMETHING THAT IS CLEVER, INCREDIBLY WELL THOUGHT OUT,

AND SUPER BRILLIANT!

- OH. - YEAH.

- [hums]

- NOW REMEMBER, FUNG. ONCE THEY--

- [groans]

- ONCE DAD AND GAH-RI SEE THAT WE'VE REPLACED THEM

WITH YOU AND ME, THEY'LL GET JEALOUS

AND COME RUNNING BACK TO US.

OH, MAN, THIS IS GONNA BE--

OH, HERE THEY COME.

[guffaws]

STOP IT! OH, STOP IT!

I CAN'T TAKE IT! OH, DAD...

HA, DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE.

MY BEST BUDDY FUNG WAS TELLING ME A DELICIOUSLY RIBALD STORY

ABOUT...UH...

STUFF.

- YEAH.

WE'RE, UM-- WE'RE FRIENDS.

- [sighs] MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER?

- UH, YEAH, TWO BOWLS OF YOUR FINEST NOODLE SOUP.

NOTHING'S TOO GOOD FOR MY INSEPARABLE PAL FUNG.

- MM...

HMM.

- DID YOU SEE THEIR FACES?

I-- [gasps, laughs]

A BADGER?

[laughing] OH, YOU'RE KILLING ME, FUNG.

KILL. ING. ME.

- [slurps]

MMM, THIS IS...WOW.

THIS IS REALLY GOOD.

DID YOU MAKE THIS?

- YES.

DO YOU REALLY LIKE IT?

- OH, YEAH. THE NOODLES ARE SO TENDER.

WHAT IS THIS, LIKE, SOO...SOO-SOO...

"SOO-ZECHOO-WAN" STYLE?

- [chuckles] IT'S PRONOUNCED "SZECHUAN."

- WHAT?

OH, SO NOW I'M, LIKE, STUPID?

HUH? HUH?

HUH? - UH, YEAH.

IF THE TINY, UNCULTURED BRAIN FITS,

LIKE, WEAR IT.

- [grunts]

[screams]

- OW!

- YAH!

OW!

- OW!

[fighting grunts]

- UH...EASY, FELLAS, I, UH--

- UGH!

- [grunts]

- OOF!

- YAH!

HEY, OW!

LOSER...GUY.

- DON'T BE MAD AT FUNG, DAD.

- I'M NOT.

I'M MAD AT YOU FOR BRINGING HIM HERE

AND UPSETTING GAH-RI.

OH... NOW GET OUT.

OUT!

THERE, THERE...

REMEMBER WHAT THEY SAID IN MEDITATION CLASS.

BREATHE.

- [sniffles]

[wood creaking]

- AAH!

OW!

DARN IT.

- FUNG, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

- I GOT ANOTHER IDEA HOW TO GET ME BACK GAH-RI,

AND YOU BACK YOUR DAD.

- REALLY? WHAT IS IT?

WHAT IS IT?

- WAIT, IS IT ILLEGAL?

'CAUSE THEN YOU SHOULDN'T TELL ME.

- JUST COME WITH ME, OKAY, GUY?

- AAH!

- AW...

ALL RIGHT. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK, GUY.

KEEP A LOOK OUT.

- FINE, JUST HURRY.

- GAH.

OH!

[chuckles]

OOF!

- HOW'D IT GO?

- NO PROBLEM.

[snickers]

BY MORNING, GARY WILL BE BACK ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE LAW.

- WHERE DID YOU GET THIS?

- I-I HAVE NO IDEA.

- THAT'S THE THIEF, OFFICER. HA!

- SO YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU WOKE UP THIS MORNING,

AND THE PORCELAIN VASE OF HONGWU

JUST MAGICALLY APPEARED AT YOUR BEDSIDE?

HA, HA. DO YOU THINK I'M A FOOL?

- SIR, I--

DAD, I, UH...

- I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED.

I TOOK IT.

- WHAT?

- DAD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

YOU DIDN'T STEAL THE VASE.

FUNG AND I-- - CLAM IT, DOUGH BOY.

[spits]

NOW SLAM ME IN THE CLINKER.

- DAD, STOP IT.

WE PLANTED THE VASE THERE TO TRY TO FRAME GAH-RI.

- [gasps]

- NO POINT TRYING TO COVER FOR YOUR FATHER, DRAGON WARRIOR.

- BUT IT'S THE TRUTH! - COME ALONG, MR. PING.

IT'S CHOR GHOM PRISON FOR YOU.

- OH, SON. PLEASE TAKE CARE OF THE NOODLE SHOP

WHILE I'M GONE.

- BUT...DAD.

- I WAS TALKING TO GAH-RI.

- HOW COULD YOU?

- WELL, THAT DIDN'T WORK. SEE YA, GUY.

OOF!

- WELL, WE GOT HIM INTO THIS MESS,

AND WE'RE GONNA GET HIM OUT OF IT.

- YEAH. WE--WE CAN GET HIM OUT OF THERE.

THAT'S...TOTALLY COOL.

- THAT'S RIGHT, I'M BAD.

DON'T DO THE CRIME IF YOU CAN'T DO THE TIME.

- HOLD IT RIGHT THERE.

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

- I'VE COME FOR MY DAD. HE DIDN'T STEAL THAT VASE.

- BEAT IT OR I'LL OPEN UP A STEAMING WOK OF WHOOP-BUTT

ON BOTH OF YOU.

- DAD, OKAY, OKAY.

I KNOW WHAT I DID WAS WRONG.

I MESSED UP.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE TRYING TO REPLACE ME.

- WHAT?

OF COURSE I WASN'T.

PO...

YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY SON.

- THANKS, DAD.

SO...

- TAKE ME AWAY, FLAT FOOT.

- WHAT? ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO GO TO PRISON

JUST TO TEACH ME A LESSON?

- YES.

- DRAGON WARRIOR, I ORDER YOU TO STEP ASIDE IMMEDIATELY.

- NOT WITHOUT MY FATHER.

- THAT MAKES YOU A CRIMINAL AS WELL.

DETAIN THEM!

- AAH!

[fighting sounds]

AAH!

- YAH!

AAH!

OW!

- [grunting]

SORRY, I--OOF!

GAH!

AAH!

- OOF!

- GAH!

- STOP!

all: HUH?

[all grunting]

- AAH!

- GAH, HE SAID STOP!

- MAY I SEE THAT VASE A MOMENT?

UH-HUH. YEAH.

JUST AS I SUSPECTED.

THIS VASE IS A FAKE.

THESE MARKINGS WERE MADE WITH A LOKI QI CHI TOOL,

WHICH HADN'T BEEN INVENTED

WHEN THE REAL PORCELAIN VASE OF HONGWU WAS CREATED.

- OOH, UH, YES, OF COURSE. HA, HA, I-I SEE YOUR POINT.

I SHOULD'VE CAUGHT THAT MYSELF.

WELL, UH, SINCE NO CRIME HAS BEEN COMMITTED...

RELEASE HIM.

MY APOLOGIES, MR. PING.

- DIRTY SCREW.

- COME, GENTS, WE MUST AWAY.

- THANKS FOR EVERYTHING, MR. PING, BUT...

I THINK MAYBE I SHOULD BE MOVING ON.

I'VE GOT SOME THINGS TO SORT OUT.

- OH, OKAY, GAH-RI.

BUT YOU ALWAYS HAVE A ROOM AT THE NOODLE SHOP.

UH, UH, PROVIDED PO'S NOT USING IT, OF COURSE.

- SO...UM...

ANY IDEA WHERE YOU'RE HEADED?

I MEAN, I COULD FORWARD YOUR MAIL AND STUFF.

- WELL...

- IT'S TOO BAD THAT VASE ISN'T REAL, RIGHT?

[chuckles] WE COULD'VE MADE A FORTUNE.

- IT IS REAL. - WHAT?

BUT YOU SAID-- - FUNG.

THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A LOKI QI CHI TOOL.

I MADE IT UP.

ONCE A BANDIT, ALWAYS A BANDIT.

- DOES THAT MEAN YOU'RE COMING BACK?

- IF YOU'LL HAVE ME.

AND YOU PROMISE TO WORK ON YOUR TEMPER.

- WHAT TEMPER? GAH!

OH, THAT.

YEAH. OKAY.

- SHALL WE? - AFTER YOU.

- OOF! [porcelain shattering]

- GAH-RI!