Original subtitles

This is Iike when we drove to...

- What's the name. - Right.

I don't remember that northern part very much .

Well , that was because you were asleep.

- And it was dark. - Okay.

But I do remember...

We had that bloke with the broken arm in the back.

- Long John . - Yeah, didn't he have a broken arm?

Maybe he did . Don't know whether it was broken ,

I think it was bound up.

He was much older than us, wasn't he?

I remember him as being much older than us.

I think he was older, and he was extremely disdainful .

I think he had a certain respect for you , but he was very disdainful of me.

I think he thought I was...

A wanker, to be honest.

I can't even remember how we met him.

At Seamus's.

Aye, but how did he get there?

Someone had to take him .

There wasn't a notice on the door.

- No, I don't know. . . - "Come in and have tea

and toast at 2 in the morning , and Iisten to Billie Holiday."

- Yeah, free drinks. - Free drinks and looked after by an old ...

- Yeah-- - Lady, as we perceived her.

Exactly. Boiled potatoes and butter.

Yes.

- I've no idea. - But then we kind of abandoned him .

- I n Cannes? - No, I don't think we did .

I think he abandoned us.

I think once we hit the south of France...

- He thought he could do better. - "Yeah , fuck these wankers.

I'm out of here." Because he was really...

- Remember how angry he was? - Yes.

I had a dream Iast night that...

I had a twin sister, and we Iived in Bali .

And ...

Both of us were in Iove with one solider, and I ended up with him.

I was in Iove with him , and we were in the bedroom,

and then , another soldier came in to attack us.

And we knew we were gonna die, and so...

He wanted to carry on making Iove, and I wanted to lie down .

I don't remember him being angry at us.

I think he was just generally angry.

Generically angry.

Whatever happened to him?

Well , I never saw him again .

Well , that's not true. I can't say that.

I can't remember.

The soldier came in, and we got up.

And I managed to go and hide.

And climb into the cupboard .

And as soon as I got in the cupboard , I knew I was safe.

And I felt very relieved .

Yeah .

Someone once said , "A mosquito can no more be hit

by a raindrop than a man can be hit by a glacier."

The tick-over rate is so fast that for them ,

a raindrop is sluggish .

That is really interesting .

I sometimes have that nightmare that I can't find my way to the stage.

Harry, do you ever have that?

Not that exact one, but I have anxiety dreams about

either my keyboard's way too big , or the stand's wobbly,

and I can't. . . Something preventing me from ,

you know, doing my job, or I've totally forgotten

what I'm supposed to be doing .

- I do get that. It's terrible. - Yeah, I get--

I've spoken to Graham about that. He gets that as well .

- Does he? - Yeah .

Maybe all performers get that or maybe all people.

- I think all people have anxiety dreams. - I think they do. Yeah .

Do you remember that Iake near Ioannina?

- No. - I think that was the first time we washed .

For about a month .

Well , I remember washing in the sea in Saint-Tropez.

And finding that soap doesn't like sea water.

No, it doesn't work. It doesn't work.

There is a naturaI

inhibition between sodium oleate and sodium chloride.

Well , that's chemistry in A Ievel for you .

My second escape, because there were two escapes in my life.

You know, I keep saying the third one is gonna be from Hollywood .

But those two escapes, one was in Hungary

during the Second World War.

And the second was in 1 956 when the H ungarian Revolution happened .

There was terrible fighting going on in Budapest between the Russian army

and the H ungarian Revolution .

And after two weeks,

I realised that there's never gonna be any change in that country.

And we were naively thinking that the Americans, the British,

everybody was gonna come and save Hungary,

but nobody came.

And I said to my friends, "I don't care what happens,

but I'm gonna get out of this country because if I don't,

nothing will ever happen for me." And I was not gonna die here Iike that.

Then I was determined to Ieave.

What I've been doing for the Iast few years is touring around the world ,

doing this show that is basically an anti-war statement.

And it's based upon the philosophies, political and humanist, if you Iike,

that I inherited from my mom and dad .

Because that's where I was brought up.

And a big part of my philosophy is I'm going on and on about constantly,

is that who we are depends upon the accidents

of our genetic information and the geography of our birth .

And when they came down, there was a curfew,

and you couldn't be in the street. You were shot

if you were in the street before 1 0:00 in the morning .

And there were three huge Russian tanks in the street.

And as we got out of the building , the turrets of the tank followed us

to the street corner.

And my friend gave his watch to the Russian post.

And they Iet us go.

And then we got on a train .

And that night, we got out before midnight into Austria.

And ...

And we were free.

I've recently been reading

research that has Ied people to suppose that newborn babies are benevolent.

- Do you think that's true? - Definitely.

So, you would agree with me that they have to be taught to be...

...evil?

Well , they're surrounded by shit, and they pick it up.

- But isn't that the same thing? - Well , okay, all right. We'Il say that.

Well , I find that hugely encouraging because I'm desperate to believe...

...that human beings are intrinsically good , and that if they weren't taught

to be horrible to each other, they wouldn't be.

Subtitles: SD I Media