Original subtitles

Never forget the gaps.

If there are no gaps, where do you expect the images to go?

How else do you expect them to get in?

Usually, this song is played

only on an electric guitar.

It's a song by the group Téléphone: Human Bomb.

I wanna talk to you about tomorrow's weapon

Born of the world, it'll be its end

I wanna talk to you

About me

About you

Inside I see images, colours

That aren't mine, that sometimes scare me

Sensations

That can drive us mad

Our senses are the strings of pathetic marionettes

Our senses are the path to our mind

The human bomb, you have it in your hand

The detonator's there just next to your heart

The human bomb is you, it belongs to you

If you let anyone take over your destiny

It's the end

The end

My father can't sleep without his tranquillizers

Mum can't work without her uppers

Someone sells them what they need to keep going

I'm an electron bombarded by protons

The rhythm of the city is my true boss

I'm charged

All together!

With electricity

In the accelerator's heart if I unfortunately

Meet a particle that puts me in a bad mood

I mustn't let myself go

I mustn't let myself go

You mustn't

He mustn't, we mustn't

You mustn't, they mustn't

You mustn't

The detonator's there just next to your heart

The human bomb is you, it belongs to you

If you let anyone take what keeps you going

The human bomb

The detonator's there just next to your heart

The human bomb is you, it belongs to you

It's you

I can't let myself go

I've no right to let myself go

If you let anyone take over your destiny

It's the human bomb

Thank you very much!

Guillaume!

François!

ON THE ADAMANT

Day centre Paris central unit

All right.

On the day's agenda,

there's at least one newcomer

in the room.

- We usually like... - There.

- To take time... - What's your name?

Maybe we can go through the items,

then give him the floor after?

I'm not giving him the floor, just asking his name as he's new.

Maybe we can list the items first,

then we can start with him and ask him his name.

- All right. - You see?

It's like the agenda of a meeting.

Welcoming newcomers.

What else can we put on the agenda,

ladies and gentlemen?

This week...

Discuss yesterday evening?

Yesterday evening.

Discuss the soccer.

Some workshops have given their summer schedule,

but not all of them, notably music.

So I'll note "workshop schedules".

"Current climate".

"Music".

"Radio".

Can we expand on it now?

Yes.

Shall we start?

- Let's expand. - Ok, here goes.

I'll let you...

Let me see. "Welcome of newcomers".

Who's new here?

Young man, what's your name?

Hello, everyone. I'm Charafdine Bouzaraa,

I'm a first-year nursing student in St Maurice.

I'll be here for five weeks.

Charafdine. All right.

A nursing student...

In psychiatry?

I'm not yet...

attached to a department.

Not until the end of the year.

We choose the unit we want to work in then.

So, welcome.

Welcome.

Shall we move on to item two?

The soccer?

Who wants to talk about soccer?

- Did you watch last night's match? - Yes.

Are you happy the Italians won?

- I back the English. - You hate them?

- No, I was for the English. - Me too.

We lost.

By one goal.

At the end, a shootout penalty... A penalty shootout.

Did you watch the match here or at home?

No, I watched the...

I put the radio on for the score.

Watch a soccer match? No way!

So the Italians won

after a penalty shootout.

Where are we?

"Travelling".

What's "Travelling", ma'am?

Ten years of it.

It's our film club, ma'am.

A film club!

This year is the Travelling workshop's tenth anniversary.

- Here? - Yes.

Ten years?

That's good.

Thursday, we show White Fang...

Before White Fang,

we'll gather to...

talk and exchange about the club's tenth anniversary

because we'd like to organize

a special week

next autumn

with an opening and closing...

Is that a guillotine?

What?

- I didn't hear. - It's like a guillotine.

Because?

It's like...

That's how Bruno speaks.

I state things fairly clearly.

- An opening film, a closing one... - Nice.

A festive event.

A film a day.

And there'll be a theme

that has gradually emerged,

and that would be, "Together for better and worse".

We're discussing organization, who'll do what,

and who's ready to do what.

Can we suggest films?

Of course, that's the idea.

I'm eager to see the doctor.

I'm going to unleash all my...

What's the word?

My anxieties.

Doctors are damn good at listening to people's anxieties.

I try to talk as little as possible

because it's confined to...

it's confined to...

to activities.

It's confined to activities, and that's that.

So what's your name?

Erik.

- Erik. And you? - Nicolas.

Nicolas... That's a nice name.

- Erik isn't? - Yes, Erik is too.

- Erik's a nice name. - Thank you.

I mean it.

I've lost my father and my brother.

I only have my mother left.

I'm alone in a room and...

I'm not allowed visitors, except for my mother.

No friends, male or female.

It's no fun.

- Is the gear all yours? - Yes.

Do you have a car to lug it all about?

That's good.

Do you have a car too, Erik?

You don't have one?

This gentleman lugs it all about?

- What? - I have a motorbike.

A motorbike... But you can't carry that thing on it.

You can? And that?

That too?

Motorbikes are better!

Motorbikes are great.

I rode one once.

It was a Honda something.

Gosh, it was really good.

We crossed a track covered with grass.

Gosh, it was good.

Do you have any pets?

No.

You've no pets?

You have a lady friend then?

That's good. I miss having friends.

I miss having friends.

I have friends, but...

All they ever think about

are their own problems.

The coffee's very good.

Not just good, but strong.

It's strong?

Like the coffee they gave me at the bakery.

It's like the coffee they gave me at the bakery.

I was waiting for your opinion because I was thinking Pat...

Pascal will say it isn't strong enough.

No, it's strong enough.

Want it in a bowl?

Yes.

- Are you filming me? - Yes.

I didn't shave this morning.

Neither did I.

Neither did I.

Yesterday, I don't know. Maybe yesterday.

Maybe I shaved yesterday.

A bakery gives you coffee in the morning?

Every morning?

Almost every morning.

I ask for change and they give me coffee.

I have a croissant they gave me. I didn't eat it yet.

They gave me one.

I nearly drank two coffees. I refused the first.

The bakery opens at 7 o'clock.

At 7 o'clock, they put out chairs and tables.

Outside the bakery. At 7 o'clock they open.

You have some real stars here.

Some real stars.

Worse... better than movie actors.

I've seen movies since I was a kid. I was born on May 10th, 1963.

I went to see Jean Gabin, Bourvil, Louis de Funès and so on.

Lino Ventura and so on, I know them all.

What's his name? Michel Constantin.

You have actors here who don't realize they're actors.

They don't realize they're actors.

I don't get them, as they're actors without realizing.

People say it's medical.

It isn't. They're actors without realizing.

Actors without realizing.

Speaking is very hard.

Conversation's very hard.

We're closing the bar soon.

- Give me a coffee. - One last coffee?

- Is there any left? - Yes.

Large, small?

Small.

How do you write "aquarium"?

A-Q-U-A...

Slow down, that's too fast.

- H-U? - A-Q-U...

- A for Arnold. - Q for Quebec.

- Q for... - A-U?

No, A-Q.

A-Q...

A-what?

A-Q...

A-Q!

I thought it was a C. It's not a C.

A-Q...

Plus 31.20...

plus 18.10...

plus 8.85...

- 8.85? - Yes.

Plus 2.82...

plus 1.57.

393.04.

- Not the same sum. - Not quite.

Did you all get that?

So I don't note it?

- 393? - .04.

Almost 100 euros short.

- No. - 50 euros?

How much was there? 400?

409.

12 euros.

12 or 13 euros.

409.68.

Minus 14.44?

44, yes.

9.53?

Plus 41.30...

minus 3.55.

I went wrong somewhere.

Mark it in red.

409 point what, Nicolas?

- Sorry. - .68.

We have an accounting error. Here's the money we found.

Note this next to "accounting error".

16.64 euros.

Not drawing today, Alexis?

Actually,

I prefer...

I prefer to go where the DVDs are in the library,

or to go on the computer,

because, actually,

I don't feel like drawing.

That's my point of view.

But we'll see later.

- Yes, sure. - Ok.

But you'll stay with us?

I'll stop by to see you.

Stop by to say things are ok.

Actually, I have no...

I have no thoughts about that.

You don't want to do a drawing?

I don't know... Alexander of Constantinople

or Cyril of Byzantium?

Which country is Alexander the Great from?

- Greece. - From Greece?

He's from Greece.

And Emperor Alexis Komnenos?

- Alexis what? - Alexis Komnenos.

- Where's he from? - He's a Byzantine emperor.

He had a beautiful palace, he lived alone.

And his goal was to protect his palace.

Actually, in my story, it was a tiny little war.

It's a story you made up?

I saw a documentary on him. Not many people died.

There.

Why not draw that story?

I'll try.

And after... After, I'll...

We'll talk about it.

- You'll tell us about it. - Yes.

I'll stop by after my drawing.

- Draw first. - Alexis Komnenos.

Exactly, then tell us that story.

All right.

It's two little girls with drawings and stickers.

Those are stickers on the right?

Who are the little girls?

Fanny and Suzanne.

Are they sisters?

Yeah.

You know them?

Of course.

My daughters.

Fanny and Suzanne seem quite big.

- No, they're three. - Three?

They look older in the drawing.

Yes, they almost seem to be...

I don't know... in early adolescence.

No.

Are they twins?

Yeah.

They look like their mother.

They look like their mother.

Do they look like their mother, Olivier?

No, their father.

Are they redheads?

No, blonde, but well...

That'll pass because they're young.

Which one's Fanny? The one on the left?

- Fanny, and Suzanne on the right? - Yeah.

Suzanne with the stickers.

So where are you?

I'm not there.

They're being good then?

Where are they in the drawing?

- At home. - At home?

They don't have phones?

Phones?

- At three? - At three?

Do you see Suzanne and Fanny often?

As a matter of fact, I'm going to see...

There's another drawing on the back.

Tell us about it.

This weekend, I'm seeing Suzanne to go to the zoo.

That's great!

That's you behind her then?

On the scooter?

No, I'm holding her.

So she doesn't fall.

What's the animal you're looking at?

It's a lion.

Are just the two of you going?

With a friend and his daughter too, Lise.

A friend, Clément. And Julie.

A whole group then.

You have to see it like a good day starting.

You wonder, "What can I be like today to make it good?"

Things like that matter.

Like you when you get here and wonder what you'll do.

You can shoot images...

On the fly.

Like a photographer capturing a moment.

Like Doisneau's lovers outside the city hall.

He took his photo that way.

Like war photographers.

All right, let's get started. It's already late.

The vaccine raises questions,

but we need to talk about how it unsettles us,

how events affect us,

the consequences, be they social, cultural,

somatic or emotional.

And, Daniel, you'd like to see

a group explaining how the body works.

Yours?

No, the whole body.

- In general? - Yes.

All right.

That'd interest me.

And with videos to explain how the body...

Those are discussions we had

around the issues

of Covid and the vaccine.

How does a vaccine work? What does medication do?

We ended up asking how the body works.

A workshop would interest me.

A workshop explaining how all that works.

There's "Current Climate" to deal with such questions...

They don't know much.

I think it'd be interesting to invite

doctors or virologists or specialists,

now and then, to keep on thinking about that.

- I think you recover from madness. - Yes?

I'm going to recover.

I'm convinced I'll recover.

What would recovering mean?

Taking my medication, going to see the doctor,

keeping busy all day,

and being lucid.

Would you be better like that?

I have some good times.

That's it exactly.

Muriel Thouron came here

to explore the mystery of madness and have good times.

- Exactly. - Welcome then.

Frédéric? Catherine too, maybe? Anyone else?

Marie.

Marie, are you here?

Sonic Protest was incredible.

Fantastic, extraordinary.

100% hippie.

I spent two amazing days there.

All the hippies met up at Sonic Protest?

I discovered that Montreuil

is a bit like San Francisco in the sixties.

It was a huge, magnificent trip.

Two wonderful days

of olfactive, sensory experiences,

of intercultural encounters,

with people from other places,

experimenters, poets, acrobats...

I even spotted a butterfly in working condition.

I think I saw a butterfly.

Two fantastic days.

And an amazing pop group.

I thought they were the reincarnation of the Grateful Dead.

110, they're called. 110.

Very impressive. The Papotins too:

"The autistic speak out".

It was fabulous, incredible.

It overthrows every value.

The value system and official position are totally reversed.

They turn all that into poetry.

Poetry... It was great, so surprising.

My mum wanted me to be an artist and gave me a box of oil paints,

in 1977.

She had a house in the country and made me a studio in the barn

so I'd paint like Van Gogh.

My parents liked Van Gogh a lot.

We had Van Gogh paintings, copies, at home.

The idea wasn't absurd.

Looking at Van Gogh's face

next to my brother's,

I find the resemblance extremely disconcerting.

That's what struck me.

That's what put me on the trail.

And who's Angel?

Angel is me as a photo-novel character.

He's my double in a way.

He's a fictional character.

If the hypothesis is correct, Alain and I

are the reincarnation of Theo and Vincent.

That explains

why Alain and I were used as models

for Mr Wim Wenders

who made us

modern versions of Theo and Vincent.

I've gone through the filmography and books on Paris, Texas,

I copied out the dialogue, I photocopied it all

for no end of time.

I tried to understand...

if I was right or wrong,

concerning my hypothesis.

Travis and Walt, the brothers in Wenders' film,

are Alain and I, transposed into Reagan's America.

But that devil, that rascal, Wim Wenders has never spoken about it.

If you try that edge,

it won't cut.

However,

if you take it here in the middle...

Ok and then I...

Here, it won't cut.

Ok.

This side then.

Yes, turn it to face you.

There you go.

Before, it was Spiderman.

But that was before.

Now it's Saïd, like my surname.

I'll remove the S to put it on this one.

Is it centred?

Let's go then.

A bit more.

I won't do this for a living!

There's a little hole. The idea is to put the thread in it.

You can pull more.

There, that's better.

Did you have a job?

No.

Poetry.

But it's not a job.

I can't see a thing.

Do you know the new needles? No?

The thread doesn't go in the eye.

The needle's like this at the top.

You put the thread like this, press

and that's it.

Good, huh?

Aziz was naturalized this week,

and you're bringing us...

Since March 19th.

Naturalized French.

I acquired...

Nadya, no need to get on the table and sing the Marseillaise.

There is.

It's a big thing after all.

And you were born in Han Asparuhovo.

That's beautiful.

I'm going to cry.

Me too.

National anthems are making us cry today.

Bravo. Thank you.

Bravo, Nadya.

Beautiful.

It'd be great if you could write it down.

It's like a lullaby.

For the magazine?

Yeah, maybe with a note.

Ok, I'll write it.

The eye.

The slightly prominent nose.

The beard.

And the neck, of course.

The mouth?

The mouth? The mouth's here.

But, that said,

you're free to see what you want.

What you see is a face?

Yes...

I didn't set out to do a face.

When I do a shape, I always try to find...

To put in an eye...

But not necessarily.

To see a face here, you really...

have to try hard.

Usually, the neck is down here.

But I like to do my necks...

Your drawing seems stretched out.

Yes, my drawing is stretched out.

My conk is a bit too big. I regret that my conk...

My conk's too big.

What's the title?

The title is...

The Conk that Shouldn't Have Been Drawn.

The style I like

is that of rockers with thick lips and a fringe.

They have a sort of pigeon style.

A pigeon style?

I don't know that. What's a pigeon style?

Actually, I'll explain.

There are words or people that remind me of things.

And that's the feeling I get.

So, thick lips, a lock of hair...

and a chin-strap beard.

- A what? - A chin-strap beard.

- Thin-strap? - Chin-strap.

A chin-strap.

A line of beard, right?

Not on you, mostly on young men.

Young men in their early twenties.

What's a chin-strap beard? A thin line of beard?

- Yes. - Is that it?

Actually, I mean a big chin-strap beard.

The cheeks are shaved and it's only here.

- A bit like yours. - Like this.

- Right. - Like that.

I don't understand the pigeon bit.

Because of the black leather jackets in the 70s.

They often have pigeons or crows...

Yes, crows. Ok, I see.

Eagles.

Yes, because, actually,

that reminds me of a thing.

Very tall, thin men with...

They remind me of "injection", with a crest, a syringe...

when they're thin and...

The crest reminds me of a needle

and the word "injection".

Tall, thin men

with a crest remind me of "injection" cos they're needle-thin.

They remind me of a thing, see.

For instance,

a bald man

reminds me of an orange.

That image is clearer to me than the crest.

In birds or pigeons maybe.

Yes, because often,

in the modern way, people say, "It's no joke."

"It's no joke." Like that.

- A pout? - "Good answer."

When you say thick lips, it's the face they pull.

A face they pull that goes with the word.

For instance, my brother, when I was little,

he had a small sky-blue balaclava.

That reminds me of the word "puree".

- Puree? - Yes, the word "puree".

Yes, because babies often eat puree.

When it's cold like this.

It's like "puree", like that.

And, because of that,

it's a bit scary.

It's funny, but scary.

It worries me.

It makes me think of death.

There's worse than psychiatry. I'm not complaining.

Some say, "Psychiatry sucks, it's jail in a hospital."

They don't realize.

I've never been in jail, but some have and are hospitalized.

I know a guy called Alex who was in jail and it was hell.

Hospital isn't jail, it's a lot more easy-going.

Some say it's worse than jail. That's bullshit.

They say the nurses are like screws. It's not like that.

They give meds, a bad point.

They have to, but they don't like doing it.

They like talking.

Talking is what nurses, doctors and psychologists like.

More than finding a treatment,

doctors like talking with patients. It's obvious.

Meds are secondary. I see that with my psychiatrist.

She says, "Will this suit you?"

"Fine, ma'am". Then we talk about other things.

They're secondary. The late Dr Picard, rest his soul,

was a top psychiatrist.

The first time I entered his office, I didn't have a cigarette.

Picard was a smoker. He died of lung cancer.

"Come on, François, have a seat."

A cloud of smoke!

I sat down. A full ashtray...

"May I smoke here, doctor?"

"It's not a possibility, François, it's an obligation!"

The laughs I had with Picard!

Then Mrs Durand-Py. Amazing too. You knew her?

Some psychologists, psychiatrists and nurses listen to you.

You go there, it's important.

You go there, we play guitar and you leave again.

Bruno, Céline and others go to the hospital.

The Adamant nurses go to the hospital, it's important.

Mentally sick people have no family.

They get on badly with their family.

I don't want to generalize, but it often happens.

- That's the case with you? - Yes, it is.

I had an imposing father, tried to identify and bit the dust.

The director Gérard Gozlan.

Bit the dust how?

I'd have liked to be like him.

Resemble him. Like I said to him one day,

"Dad, I know I'm the only failure in your life."

He said, "Stop it, you'll make your mother cry again."

She started crying. It's true.

He didn't care that I was sick, he wanted me to be happy.

You were sick when you said that?

I'm sick, I'm still sick.

Only strong meds keep me from raving.

They let me talk to you, Guillaume.

Otherwise, I think I'm Jesus.

Surrounded by little birdies, up in heaven.

I start raving without my meds.

They matter more than talking.

People say, "Talking will help."

No, treatment first, then talking.

Not the other way round.

If you don't get that, you get nothing.

It's true.

I'm unbearable without my meds. Unbearable.

Plus I screw up.

Without my meds, I could throw myself in the Seine.

To piss people off, just to piss everyone off.

How long now?

Since I was 18, I'm 57 now.

18?

François, I'll see you on Thursday.

I'll be at the hospital.

Great, we can have a jam session.

Yeah, if you want.

- You'll make your way here Friday? - Sure.

- That's a deal? - No worries. Bye, Guillaume.

- Bye, François. - Bye. And thank you!

My son's well, he's 16, he's grown, he's bigger than me.

When did he go into foster care?

When he was five.

What happened then?

I wasn't well at the time.

My mind was a real mess.

So they must have thought I couldn't take care of him.

They took him from me when he was five.

He was in a children's home at Port-Royal, for six months.

I'd go there to see him.

Then he was sent to a Moroccan foster family.

Has he been with them since?

Yes, with the same family.

It's all going well.

They get on well.

He's grown, he's well brought up.

It's ok.

- Do you miss seeing him? - Of course.

I was traumatized for years.

I missed not having him with me,

not helping with homework,

not caring or cooking for him, looking after him, going out...

I missed him a lot,

but they said he was stable away from me.

He had his sport, his school, his studies,

a good foster family...

So they let me know I couldn't take him back.

But I miss seeing him more than once a month.

I think of him every day. I miss my son.

I was sad at the time.

I felt cast into another world when I had my son.

People seemed aggressive around me,

in bad moods.

I felt I'd been cast into another world.

It's better now. I don't hear voices.

My friends support me a lot.

My relationship with my son is better too because, at first,

when I went to see him, I couldn't utter a word.

I couldn't answer him, so we had supervised visits,

with a psychologist who helped me communicate with my son.

Things are much better now and we feel good together.

You'll see him soon?

We're going to eat at a restaurant with his caseworker.

- The three of you? - Yes.

We'll talk about school, about his foster family,

how he's doing, his health, and all that.

There you go.

197.35.

197.35.

Perfect.

All right.

- Plus... - Petty cash.

Petty cash came to 25.17. Plus 25.17.

25.17...

Plus 137.

Plus 137.

359.52.

359.52.

What was noted in the accounts?

333.92.

That's a big difference.

Is it your coffee?

I noted it in the accounts.

- How much was the coffee? - 25.41, but I deducted it.

Yes, but...

You took it at one point from...

We didn't note it in the...

Yes, that's it.

The first step is good, with the pouches.

We're spot on there, to the nearest cent.

It goes haywire after that. I need a petty cash column.

Yes, but we'd need the sum...

- Of the rolls? - Of the rolls before...

No, the total on the table before we do the rolls.

Nicolas, would you like us to take a moment

to do the chart together?

I don't understand it.

Precisely, we'll start again from scratch.

We'll take an hour or so to think about it.

What do you say?

The first time I saw it, I too was a bit...

When I made it, I wasn't...

It took me a while to get used to the chart.

A couple of times.

It's not easy to use.

No, we'll try to simplify it so it'll be easier to use,

even by someone not used to keeping accounts.

I felt bad this morning. I was upset.

I took a Valium.

There was a great show once, The Invisible Camera.

Did you ever see it? In the sixties.

They'd trap people outside supermarkets,

with a shopping trolley and a camera.

They'd hide in locker rooms and film people in stores,

with their trolleys full of provisions.

- What for? - To be on TV.

They filmed people without them knowing,

then, after,

they revealed the camera, showed themselves and explained.

- Like Candid Camera? - Yes.

They explained it was for TV.

The people were a bit surprised.

It was a good show as you saw people in their natural surroundings.

Your praying mantis is colourful.

It's kind of like, what's the word, a joke.

She has a bow tie?

She has a bow tie for guests.

That's bad.

A mantis with guests is bad.

With what?

- Guests. - Guests, ok.

- Bad, huh? - She's dressed up.

She's dressed up, waiting for her guy.

What'll she do to him?

Eat him.

You'll draw that?

I'll draw a dish next to her.

Can you tell us a bit about it?

First of all, I like my picture.

- You like it? - Yes.

It's full of life, joyful,

harmonious,

and you can see all the shapes you want to see.

I think it's very feminine.

Why?

Anatomically, it's very feminine.

What female anatomy do you see?

Vaginas.

You see vaginas?

In the middle and to the side.

It's an interior, an interior that is

moving forward.

I see an ear.

They're good vibrations.

Here.

A big ear.

With this, I want to thank my father.

My father who got me into art. He's an artist himself.

That's all.

It's a praying mantis.

It's called Life, Love and Death.

Life because she scurries along,

love because she mates,

and death because she kills her husband.

She's in colour so as not to scare anyone.

She has a bow tie for her guests.

Beware if she invites you!

Otherwise, it's an ordinary drawing.

I had no inspiration. Next time maybe.

You were inspired.

It was Sébastien who...

I was doing a giraffe.

He said it looked like a praying mantis, so it turned into a mantis.

Sébastien's so influential!

- That's all. - That's all?

- She has blue eyes. - Yes.

I love the colours.

I wonder if she might not be in love with him.

Hold on... Ava Gardner?

Yes, Ava Gardner and Humphrey Bogart.

The relationship between them is really collusive.

Their characters in the movie, or in real life?

No, not in life, in the movie.

- Seen it? - Yes, a long time ago.

At 17 or so.

My memory of it is...

Unforgettable?

I can't tell you everything, Catherine. Part is unforgettable,

but it doesn't concern the film as I saw very little of it.

She has a lot of presence.

I remember seeing it...

But I can't tell you everything.

I felt bad, I felt so down

I was pale, a smoker of renown

Yet at the smell you didn't frown

The smell of a life broken down

The years pass, again and again

With hours of comforting pain

Near the dead end, patient remain

The years pass, 20 in vain

Nobody's perfect

Nobody's perfect

That's better, I see you smile

Regain strength, feel pleasure for a while

Love helps you go that extra mile

To feel a little joy before death's exile

Nobody's perfect

Nobody's perfect

Nobody's perfect

You can come closer, I think.

That's it.

Communicate with him to make him relax.

Explain things to him.

Maybe talk to him. Try saying something.

I'm going to take a photo.

Place your hand like this to hold it.

Thumb here. This finger takes it.

Ok, got it.

I'm relaxed.

No, it's good.

Go on, you can take your photo.

The mask's odd.

Try to correct the left-right thing.

Get him centred and then press it.

Don't be too brusque about it.

Yeah, ok, shall we try it without the mask?

I'll take it off then.

It was hot in that thing.

Closer, like just now.

A bit less close, just a bit. Around there.

So, do we smile or not? As we're uneasy and tense...

Smiling helps me relax.

It's true.

One with the mask and one without.

It's pretentious to say I think they're all good.

They're all good, they're perfect. Close is good.

Your favourite?

- The closest. - The last one?

There.

That one.

That one's better.

It's slightly in profile.

So you agree on this one?

It's bright.

You're right. Thank you.

- Shall we reverse the roles? - Let's try.

All the hair has to fit in the frame. Not easy...

I'll try really close now.

Look at his eyes.

Yeah, not bad.

Can you take off your mask? Put it in your pocket.

Remember the framing and distance.

Try to be consistent.

There. Is that good?

I think so.

I'll let you choose.

I don't like that look.

The photo's good, but I don't like my look.

I try to avoid that look.

It reminds me of the hospital.

All right.

Do another with a different look.

All right.

Try this one. Take a look.

- Is this better? - Yes.

Yes, that's the one.

When you're a child,

you always say, "If I had a magic wand,

I'd be like that."

Everyone has thought of a magic wand.

"No more this, no more that,

I'll be different."

But that's only in cartoons.

Disappearance and reappearance

as someone else.

There.

If I had a wand...

I think the term "magic wand" exists.

If I had a magic wand,

what would I like?

I don't know.

The police told me, "If you kill someone,

we'll put you away for 30 years."

The cops said that.

If I kill anyone, they'll put me away for 30 years.

The police warned me.

Lucky I'm not armed. When I hit my neighbours

I'd have emptied a magazine if I'd been armed.

I'd be in a coma, a big coma in my mind afterwards.

30 years in jail is a coma in your mind.

What coma?

It's blocked in my mind, always the same ravings.

That's what I call it.

The same ravings and mental problems.

I take pills to avoid all that, otherwise...

Without pills, I get acute fits and hallucinations.

Without pills, acute fits and hallucinations.

That's how it is.

I don't want to have to talk in my mind and my belly.

I like to talk so I don't talk in my mind and my belly.

I don't want to feel hate for people.

But some people have old hatreds.

Don't cultivate hatred as people all have old hatreds,

here and in the belly.

They all have old hatreds.

Some have old hatreds.

People wage war and kill each other.

How can you trust a human being? You can't.

What do your voices say?

They told me not to tell you.

They answer back, those voices.

I can't talk about them. They answer bluntly.

You bet.

Today, they said, "Wash, you're dirty."

I had a shower yesterday at 5 pm.

I didn't want another, I'm clean. But they told me to wash.

I won't tell you all the bad words they say.

Sometimes they call me a son of a bitch. Seriously.

At one time, when my mind was in a coma, the voices really insulted me!

I suffered a lot. And the next day they'd answer back.

It was one answer after another for years.

A psychiatric patient who kills a policeman....

it happens,

but there are no more criminals in psychiatry than elsewhere.

When they say a terrorist was mad, that makes us laugh.

The people here aren't terrorists, they're...

they're very fragile people. I'm very fragile myself.

And so...

I was saying people have image problems here.

That's because others can look at us...

In the metro, we have slightly broken faces, maybe.

I don't know.

People always give us curious looks.

It's like receiving negative vibrations.

It strikes me around the heart.

I feel unease around there

when people hurt me with noises.

I call them vibrations

because it's like someone hitting something

and trying to make me feel uneasy.

As a result, I'm hyper-sensitive to all the noises around me.

That makes daily life really frustrating.

I need to listen to music so I don't hear those sounds.

It's like being telepathic. It's complex.

When I think of something, the noise repeats that thing.

It's disturbing. I mean, imagine you think alone in your mind

and the noises repeat what you're thinking in your mind.

It's complicated.

Are there things that scare you?

Scare me? Yes, people, when they begin to make noise,

when they make noise, that scares me. I hide right away

because I'm really scared.

What's around your neck?

They're bracelets to calm the vibrations.

It's a crystal bracelet

that captures the waves and imprisons them.

It's a good transmitter of positive energy

as well.

I have a magnet too to block vibrations.

It allows you to capture the vibrations and block them.

Wearing a magnet makes a real difference.

I've lost my freedom.

All of you are free.

You do what you want.

I can't do what I want.

I'm not allowed to.

My husband is dead.

I worked for Abdallah.

For King Fahd.

I worked as an interior designer for King Fahd.

Yes, that's better.

Jim was a researcher at UCLA

Like Agnès Varda, he wanted to make movies one day

He came to Paris on an airplane

He came to Paris to never see a revolution again

Oh, dreamer, dreamer

Never say never...

The dreamer strolls on the concrete shore

The record labels seek a star to make fans roar

Into the sky all around, TV aerials soar

The girls wear their hair like lions' manes of lore

Lions' manes of lore

In an all-night bar in Los Angeles

He saw a beautiful girl with blond hair

The dreamer strolls on the concrete shore

I'll be your mentor, your Pygmalion and more

Oh, dreamer, dreamer

It's my subconscious at work.

I'm not aware of it. It happens automatically.

I just take down dictation.

During the night, I wrote five verses...

that I didn't know.

I won't keep it all, it's too long.

It'd be too long.

The ideas came to me

as I knew we had the music workshop today.

That awakens my creative process.

What's the song called?

The chorus is...

I absorbed Jim and Pamela's thoughts.

By capillarity.

By sitting at outdoor cafés, looking at clouds in the sky

and the stone mascarons

over buildings' street doors,

I picked up Jim and Pamela's spirit, their thoughts.

Their final argument on a café terrace...

Their final scenes in the apartment on Rue Beautreillis...

That whole incredible tragedy worthy of Sophocles,

I recorded it.

And turned it into a book.

So everything in the song is a personal experience.

It's my story too, in a way.

Through Jim Morrison's story, I tell my own story.

I had a great love affair that fell apart in 2017.

It took me three years to get over it and I pretended...

I positioned myself as a narrator.

I tell Jim and Pamela's story and that consoles me

for my own love affair that fell apart.

It was a story

like Romeo and Juliet.

So I shifted everything, I transposed my whole imagination...

to the two Californians.

You enter someone else's skin and think you'll pull through that way.

That's how it goes.

Science fiction, comics and pop music have helped me to stay alive.

Otherwise,

I don't know what I'd be. A wreck, maybe.

A delinquent. I don't know...

A down-and-out...

I don't know.

I escaped all that.

All those malignant outcomes.

I escaped a curse that struck me

and three generations of people.

Namely, my grandparents, my parents, my elders, the '68 generation.

That's why I wrote The Vegetable Rebellion

and The Story Thieves to try to understand

where this negative karma came from to strike

the Prieur family.

I wanted to understand, I had to understand

why the hell all these troubles landed on us.

What did we do to deserve it?

That's what led me to write

and to dissect the stories...

of Gérard Philipe,

of James Dean,

of Jim Morrison,

all those people who had accidents and tragedies in their lives.

James Dean, Gérard Philipe,

Jim Morrison,

Van Gogh...

I wanted to understand at all costs

why such things happened to us.

What had we done to deserve it?

And I unearthed the truth.

I ended up finding the key. I have a bunch

of psycho-sociological keys that dismantle this hellish mechanism.

And now I know why it all happened.

We're going to start with...

With what, Muriel?

We start with what's important.

Today's Monday, so what do we do on Monday?

We welcome.

- We welcome. - Who do we welcome?

My name is Sabine Berlière. I'm a psychiatrist

and I'll be taking over from Dr Hazan

from next week on.

Sabine what?

Berlière. B as in Bernard...

E-R...

L-I-E-R-E.

- Psychologist or psychiatrist? - Psychiatrist.

"My name's Sabine Berlière, psychiatrist,

I'm the new..."

I'm the new...

I'm the new...

But the new what?

"I'm the new commander."

- All right. - Commander.

- Commander. - I'd like that.

I'm getting to that.

I wanted to say I'm very happy to be here on the boat.

Very happy to be here.

Really.

I think it's a wonderful place,

very soothing.

I think it's a place of desire too

as the people here desire to be here.

And, for me, that's fundamental.

Any other newcomers?

- They look delicious. - They do.

They're damaged on the outside, but the inside...

One of the vendors

was ready to give us a crate of courgettes.

Lovely!

I told him, "Only fruit today."

Shit...

Oh, right...

I'm at 140.

I'll lower it to 70.

Perfect.

So, when it's ready, how do you know it's ready?

We'll test it on a plate to see

if it sets a little.

All right.

Shit.

I'll have a large coffee and...

Mind your hands...

Orange juice?

Yes, orange juice.

- Olivier is almost behind the bar. - Yes.

Want to run it?

I've never tried.

There's a meeting today

to draw up the bar schedule.

Really?

Down the corridor there.

Where they count?

That's right.

They count the week's money. Been along?

No, not yet.

If you want to work at the bar, you can sign up there.

- See? - They count money.

Yes.

- We decide what to buy. - Ok.

We count what's left over.

And sometimes order.

They do an order every week because a lot of things

are sold and circulate.

So if you want to sign up, go and see them.

- They begin in five minutes. - I have time.

They'll be there for two hours.

I wanted to do music.

- You wanted to do music? - At 1 pm.

You have time to go this morning if you want.

You came to do music? From the hospital?

- You came last week too, right? - Right...

Great.

- Do you play anything? - The guitar a bit.

- Acoustic or electric? - A bit of classical guitar.

And electric too.

I have a customer, I think.

A customer.

Want to serve her?

Go on then. Put that down.

He wants to try.

- Well then? - I'll have a large coffee.

But not in this cup, please.

Not in that cup?

I'll show you which cup she likes.

People like to choose.

It's a habit now. Mine's the green one.

This one has become hers.

She hopes we're going to fill it to the brim.

The biggest?

A large coffee in a big mug, so fill it up to here.

The coffee is right here.

Give me two Camemberts.

What? I didn't hear.

Two Camemberts.

- No 10-cent coins? - No.

- I've brought you some. - Great.

Can I get a large coffee for that?

- What do you need? - Six 10-cent coins.

- Here you go. - Great.

There, go on.

A large one.

- 60 cents, right? - Yes, put it there.

- Here? - Perfect, thanks.

This is for my coffee. 60 cents.

And I'll take some almonds too.

Ok. How much?

50 cents.

That's right.

Thanks, Olivier.

You're ready to run the hospital snack cart.

Besides, when you run that...

- You get a free coffee? - Yes.

Hello, Marc.

- Hello, Marc. - Hello.

- Any coffee left? - Yes.

- A small one? - A large one.

- Here for the magazine? - Yes.

- Do you write for it? - No.

- You listen to the articles. - Yes.

Hello.

Good to see you.

- Did you come by metro? - Suburban train.

Right.

- You live outside of Paris? - Yes.

- Where? - Maisons-Alfort.

That's right.

Like Laurence.

Like Laurence over there.

It's not far, with line B or D, I forget which.

Welcome.

Thanks.

In shape?

- Yes. - Good.

Good.

Mireille, can I get a small coffee in the green, ridged cup?

Everyone wants the green cup!

It's another green cup. This one?

The little ridged one. I like it.

A small one, but add a drop.

You're real pains.

Can someone help me close the bar? I'm snowed under.

His arms are like those of an old, sick child.

He vents his emotions and moans, he is sullen.

- It's not autobiographical? - No. Well...

He weeps, defeated, and his pleading air...

He weeps, defeated,

and his pleading air...

seems to say, colon,

open quotation marks. Hug me

Hug me, comma, you

comma

friend of the void

close quotation marks, exclamation mark.

There.

There, that's all.

I'm sure Van Gogh saw these trees.

These trees, the planes.

Van Gogh's planes.

I can sense his presence.

He came here, I'm sure Vincent came here with his easel.

He painted the barges on the Seine, Vincent did.

The plane trees,

the sun, the clouds, even the sun,

the birds, the wind...

He caught the wind to paint it, he caught the sun,

he painted the drifting leaves, the wind in the trees.

Day for Night

Through the Olive Trees

Travelling 10th Anniversary Festival

So, Laurent?

Ok, the festival...

The festival.

Who wants to talk about it?

It's a festival that isn't one.

There's no awards ceremony like in a festival.

But it's the anniversary of our film club, Travelling,

and we've been working on it for three or four months now.

Films will be presented every day at fairly unusual times,

like this evening.

Like you said, Rachel, with the bar opening from 6 pm

until 6:45 pm.

Someone will present tonight's film.

Frédéric, I think.

He's written something on Day for Night.

Is that right?

- Do I say yes? - Good idea.

- What do I say? - Confirm or deny it.

I confirm it.

You confirm you'll present Day for Night.

The film screens at 7 pm.

After, we'll meet up for our usual discussion

in the library.

It won't be an hour-long discussion like each Thursday.

It'll be a little shorter to make the schedule convenient

for everyone.

Remember your pills as the last screening

ends after the time to take them.

I wanted to say something not on the agenda.

It came to me listening to you.

I suggested...

I'd have rather discussed it in private,

but I'll do it now, it won't take long.

I offered to run, on Monday afternoons,

from 2 to 3, say,

when we had the workshop on the body...

The idea is...

hosting a workshop,

that I hosted when I was living at the Falret hostel.

For a year, with three girls, I hosted

a workshop, call it a dance workshop to keep it simple.

So I volunteered, but I can tell I wasn't heard...

That's why I'm saying it now.

Yesterday, for instance,

during a meeting in a park...

While talking to someone,

I suggested a Qigong movement

that did the other person a power of good.

It's an exchange.

What I'm offering is an exchange.

I'm not asking for anything in return.

There's no need to join an association.

I've been coming to the Adamant for four years now, so people know me.

But I can tell there's some kind of problem.

I think the problem's due to the fact

that people who were in the workshop as supervisors

possibly trust me, but haven't seen what I can do.

As a result, they're a bit scared of...

They don't know and aren't used to the idea of me "hosting" a workshop.

I understand their...

you know, their apprehension.

That said,

I feel I need to speak out about this subject

because I know I have the capacities...

I have the skills, I know.

I want to pass stuff on. All that interests me in life

is dancing, to keep dancing.

But it's not easy without a diploma.

I can't relinquish the idea I'm a dancer.

No one can deny it.

So I'm into movement.

So, in a place where people

need to move with their bodies,

it can't only be blah blah.

Words aren't everything. The body is part of a whole

that isn't taken into account...

in the world we live in today.

It helped that woman yesterday a lot.

And, afterwards, I felt fired up, spiritually, I mean.

I'd just seen my mother, and that gets me really down.

Anyhow...

It did her good and it did me good too.

This exchange creates well-being.

It requires nothing, no money, nothing, no preparation.

Do you understand? Nothing.

I'm ready. If people want to come, I'm ready.

I'll adapt to them.

I'll adapt to what they seek.

I know the art therapy workshop around dance.

I've attended it four years,

with Céline and Marie-Lyne who ran it eight years,

with Dasha who'd had enough...

You understand? Here and now, I think it's stupid

not to profit from my experience and to use me around movement,

so that people who want to come from 2:30 to 3:30 or 3:45

can come along and do something...

That's all, you understand, I don't need to spell it out.

We're cautious about that idea, it's true.

The idea of a patient or a former patient

hosting a workshop with other patients.

I talk about it, but I'm not heard.

It's not that.

It's not that you aren't heard, you are heard.

But between being heard and the moment when things

fall into place, that's a whole other matter.

- Not for me. - True.

You're not the one who's cautious, Catherine.

Catherine, you're not being cautious, we are.

It's good to shake us up.

It doesn't mean, next Monday, Catherine Katz will host a workshop.

It means you're reminding us

that we're, if not behind, at least too cautious about such ideas.

It goes way beyond you.

It's about how we approach such a suggestion.

Absolutely.

It's hot!

The Adamant is part of the Paris central unit

welcoming adults from the first four districts of Paris.

It is part of the Esquirol psychiatric service

of the St Maurice hospitals.

Designed in collaboration with the team and patients,

it opened in July 2010.

In a world where thinking is often confined to ticking boxes

and singularity is stifled,

some places continue to resist

to keep the poetic function of mankind and language alive.

For how much longer?