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¶ ¶
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00:00:09,943 --> 00:00:11,076
[ BOOTS THUMP ]
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Archer: Shh!
4
00:00:16,883 --> 00:00:18,383
[ CROSSBOW SPRINGS ]
5
00:00:18,418 --> 00:00:19,551
[ TILES CRACK ]
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00:00:19,586 --> 00:00:21,420
Shh!
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¶ MULATTO BUTT ¶
¶ MULATTO BUTT ¶
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[ CELLPHONE BEEPS ]
9
00:00:30,631 --> 00:00:32,731
Lana: Ohh, why the hell is
your phone on?
10
00:00:32,766 --> 00:00:34,199
Archer: Because I have a
social life!
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00:00:34,234 --> 00:00:35,066
YELLO?
12
00:00:35,102 --> 00:00:36,568
Malory: WHY THE HELL IS YOUR
PHONE ON?
13
00:00:36,603 --> 00:00:38,303
Archer: BECAUSE I HAVE --
WHY DID YOU CALL?
14
00:00:38,338 --> 00:00:39,905
Malory: BECAUSE THIS IS
IMPORTANT.
15
00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:41,073
Archer: MICROMANAGITIS.
16
00:00:41,108 --> 00:00:43,809
Malory: IF WE SHOW SAN MARINO
THE FLAWS IN THEIR PALACE
17
00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:47,646
SECURITY, THEY'VE AGREED TO HIRE
US AS SECURITY CONSULTANTS.
18
00:00:47,681 --> 00:00:49,114
AND I'M SURE I DON'T NEED TO
19
00:00:49,149 --> 00:00:50,615
REMIND YOU THAT WE HAVEN'T
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00:00:50,650 --> 00:00:52,017
GOTTEN ONE OF THESE JOBS SINCE
21
00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:53,785
YOUR UFFIZI FIASCO.
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00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:55,520
[ SIREN WAILING ]
23
00:00:55,555 --> 00:00:56,354
[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
24
00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:58,056
Archer: AND YET, YOU ALWAYS DO.
25
00:00:58,091 --> 00:00:59,858
Malory: BECAUSE YOU LEARNED
NOTHING FROM IT.
26
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:02,661
Archer: I LEARNED THAT
"FLAMMABLE" AND "INFLAMMABLE"
MEAN THE SAME THING.
27
00:01:02,696 --> 00:01:03,628
Lana: WAIT, WHAT?
28
00:01:03,663 --> 00:01:05,430
Malory: WELL, THIS TIME MAKE
SURE YOU --
29
00:01:05,465 --> 00:01:06,898
Archer: MOTHER!
OH, MY GOD!
30
00:01:06,933 --> 00:01:08,533
WE'VE BEEN SPOTTED, AND THEY'RE
SHOOTING AT US!
31
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:10,168
OH, MY! OH, GOD!
[ CELLPHONE BEEPS ]
32
00:01:10,203 --> 00:01:11,970
BET SHE'S FREAKING OUT RIGHT
NOW.
33
00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:16,041
Malory: OH, MY GOD!
WHAT SHADE IS THAT --
CRACK-WHORE RED?
34
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:18,643
Lana: YOU SAID THEY WERE
TRANQUILIZER DARTS!
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00:01:18,678 --> 00:01:20,612
Archer: AH, I MERELY IMPLIED
THAT.
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00:01:20,647 --> 00:01:23,648
Lana: DAMN IT!
SO I POISONED LIKE FIVE INNOCENT
SECURITY GUARDS?
37
00:01:23,683 --> 00:01:24,782
Archer: WOULD YOU RELAX?
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00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:26,051
I'M PRETTY SURE SAN MARINO HAS
UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE.
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00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:27,719
Lana: SO?
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00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:30,856
Archer: SO, THAT'S GOOD FOR
THEM 'CAUSE THERE'S GONNA BE
SOME NEUROLOGICAL DAMAGE.
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00:01:30,891 --> 00:01:31,756
Lana: OHH!
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00:01:31,791 --> 00:01:32,724
Archer: OH, MY.
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00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:34,326
Lana: WOW.
Archer: LANA.
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00:01:34,361 --> 00:01:37,062
Lana: THAT IS ONE SERIOUS
DIAMOND.
45
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:39,464
Pam: [ Slurring ] BUT IS IT
SUPPOSED TO BE BROWN?
46
00:01:39,499 --> 00:01:40,932
Cyril: IT'S NOT BROWN, PAM.
47
00:01:40,967 --> 00:01:42,033
Pam: [ BELCHES ]
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00:01:42,068 --> 00:01:44,302
Cyril: THAT COLOR IS CALLED
"CHAMPAGNE."
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00:01:44,337 --> 00:01:46,438
Pam: MM-HMM, AND WHY DO YOU
HAVE IT?
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00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:50,609
Cyril: BECAUSE I...AM GONNA
ASK LANA TO MARRY ME.
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00:01:50,644 --> 00:01:52,344
Pam: AND YOU'RE GONNA GIVE
HER THAT IF SHE SAYS NO?
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00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:53,679
Cyril: HEY!
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00:01:53,714 --> 00:01:58,884
Pam: LIKE A BIG "SCREW YOU
AND YOUR BIG LINCOLN LOG-Y
FINGERS"?
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00:01:58,919 --> 00:01:59,751
[ BELCHES ]
55
00:02:30,750 --> 00:02:32,417
Archer: SO, THE LAST THING
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00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:36,288
YOU HEAR ME SAY IS, "OH, MY GOD!
THEY'RE SHOOTING AT US!" AND YOU
DON'T EVEN CALL ME BACK?
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00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:38,990
Malory: WELL, I KNEW YOU
WEREN'T IN ANY REAL DANGER --
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00:02:39,025 --> 00:02:40,992
YOU KNOW, WITH LANA THERE.
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00:02:41,027 --> 00:02:42,494
- Lana: HA!
- Archer: HA!
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00:02:42,529 --> 00:02:44,696
Malory: AND LET'S JUST KNOCK
OFF THE GIGGLING.
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00:02:44,731 --> 00:02:47,132
I WANT GAME FACES ON THOSE HEADS
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00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:49,301
FOR OUR CONFERENCE CALL WITH THE
PRINCE.
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00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:51,303
Lana: I THOUGHT HE WAS A
CAPTAIN REGENT.
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00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,337
Malory: OH, WHATEVER.
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00:02:52,372 --> 00:02:55,373
ALL OF SAN MARINO COULD FIT IN
THE SOUTH BRONX.
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00:02:55,408 --> 00:02:57,576
THE IMPORTANT THING IS,
THEY'RE LOADED.
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00:02:57,611 --> 00:02:59,811
Pam: [ Laughing ]
JUST SHITFACED!
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00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:01,846
Cyril: [ GROANS ]
Pam: ABOUT 15 FREAKIN' BEERS,
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00:03:01,881 --> 00:03:05,984
ALL THAT SCHUETZIE, AND -- HOLY
SHIT! -- DID I HONK DOWN A BUNCH
OF ABSINTHE?
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00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:08,787
Cyril: I DON'T KNOW, PAM, BUT
COULD YOU LOWER YOUR VOICE?
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00:03:08,822 --> 00:03:11,957
Pam: I MUST HAVE, 'CAUSE
I HALLUCINATED YOU HAD AN
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00:03:11,992 --> 00:03:13,758
ENGAGEMENT RI--
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00:03:13,793 --> 00:03:16,428
Cyril: Not...another...word!
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00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:18,663
AND JUST WHAT IS THIS, I ASK
YOU?
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00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:21,499
Cyril: HELLO, CHERYL.
Pam: WHAT THE --
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00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:22,901
CYRIL, ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME?
77
00:03:22,936 --> 00:03:25,136
Cyril: NO, JUST TRYING TO GET
MY MUFFIN BACK.
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00:03:25,171 --> 00:03:26,271
UH, NO, YOU'RE NOT!
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00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:28,039
Cyril: I'M NOT?
NOT LIKE THAT.
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00:03:28,074 --> 00:03:30,809
YOU GOT TO SLUG HER IN THE
DIAPHRAGM WITH A FOREARM SHIVER!
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00:03:30,844 --> 00:03:33,078
Cyril: OH.
THAT'S GOOD TO KNOW.
[ CHUCKLES ]
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00:03:33,113 --> 00:03:36,114
- DO IT!
- Cyril: UM...
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00:03:36,149 --> 00:03:37,115
Pam: UGH!
[ THUDS ]
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00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:38,617
[ VOMITING ]
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00:03:38,652 --> 00:03:39,918
Cyril: WOW.
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00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:42,087
AND NO MUFFIN. SEE?
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00:03:42,122 --> 00:03:47,726
TIME LOST IS MUFFIN LOST, ALONG
WITH MY APPETITE -- FOR FOOD,
88
00:03:47,761 --> 00:03:49,060
THAT IS. OOH.
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00:03:49,095 --> 00:03:50,061
Cyril: UGH!
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00:03:50,096 --> 00:03:51,263
COME SEE ME.
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00:03:51,298 --> 00:03:54,165
Cyril: WOW, I AM INCREDIBLY
SORRY.
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00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,901
Claudio: BUT THAT IS MY
DECISION, MS. ARCHER.
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00:03:56,936 --> 00:03:58,169
AND AS CAPTAIN REGENT OF SAN --
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00:03:58,204 --> 00:04:00,939
Malory: I DON'T CARE IF
YOU'RE CAPTAIN...
Archer: CRUNCH!
95
00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:02,073
NO, WAIT, BEEFHEART.
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00:04:02,108 --> 00:04:03,508
Malory: CLAUDIO, WE HAD A DEAL.
97
00:04:03,543 --> 00:04:05,744
Archer: NO, WAIT -- KANGAROO.
Lana: AND WE POINTED OUT
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00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,579
EVERY SINGLE FLAW IN YOUR
CUT-RATE SECURITY SYSTEM.
99
00:04:07,614 --> 00:04:09,948
Malory: AND NOW NOT ONLY ARE
YOU HIRING ANOTHER AGENCY...
100
00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:11,216
Archer: THERE WAS A
CAPTAIN KANGAROO.
101
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:13,184
Malory: ...YOU WON'T EVEN PAY
ISIS FOR THAT SECURITY PROBE!
102
00:04:13,219 --> 00:04:14,919
Lana: WHICH MEANS NO BONUSES
FOR US.
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00:04:14,954 --> 00:04:15,720
Archer: WAIT, WHAT?
104
00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:17,421
Malory: OH, NOW HE CARES.
105
00:04:17,457 --> 00:04:20,892
Claudio: THOSE MONIES WILL GO
TO MEDICAL CARE FOR THE PALACE
GUARDS THEY POISONED.
106
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:22,193
Malory: WHAT?
Archer: LANA DID THAT!
107
00:04:22,228 --> 00:04:23,928
Lana: I --
Claudio: AND AS FOR HIRING
ODIN --
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00:04:23,963 --> 00:04:24,996
Malory: ODIN?!
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00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:27,299
Trexler: UH, SKIPPER, IF I
COULD JUMP IN HERE...
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00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:29,067
Malory: TREXLER!
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00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,468
Trexler: OH, MALORY.
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00:04:30,503 --> 00:04:32,137
EVEN ON -- WHAT IS THIS,
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00:04:32,172 --> 00:04:34,372
1080p? -- YOU LOOK JUST AS
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00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:37,075
SUPPLE AND SEXY AS THE DAY I
115
00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,209
FIRST LAID EYES ON YOU.
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00:04:38,244 --> 00:04:39,511
Archer: WHERE? IN A WAX MUSEUM?
117
00:04:39,546 --> 00:04:41,813
Trexler: STERLING, THAT'S NO
WAY TO TALK TO YOUR MOTHER.
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00:04:41,848 --> 00:04:44,049
Malory: AND JUST WHO IN THE
HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
119
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:46,217
GETTING ISIS BLACKLISTED AT THE
U.N.?
120
00:04:46,252 --> 00:04:47,452
Trexler: HAD NOTHING TO DO
WITH THAT.
121
00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:48,953
Malory: EMBARRASSING ME IN
BERLIN?
122
00:04:48,988 --> 00:04:50,522
Trexler: THE ENTIRE HOTEL WAS
EMBARRASSED.
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00:04:50,557 --> 00:04:52,223
Malory: STEALING ALL MY
PROSPECTIVE CLIENTS?
124
00:04:52,258 --> 00:04:53,491
Trexler: N-- YEAH.
125
00:04:53,526 --> 00:04:55,593
Malory: AND NO MATTER WHICH
WAY I TURN, YOU'RE BUTTING IN
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00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:59,564
THAT BIG, FAT, STRONG, AQUILINE
NOSE OF YOURS.
127
00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:00,765
Archer: WAIT. WHAT?
128
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,468
Trexler: YOU SAID IT WAS THE
NOSE OF A CAESAR.
129
00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:04,402
Claudio: ENH.
130
00:05:04,437 --> 00:05:06,404
Malory: WELL, PERHAPS A
LESSER CAESAR.
131
00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:08,907
Trexler: NO, NO.
NOW, I CLEARLY REMEMBER YOU SAID
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00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:12,110
"AUGUSTUS" AND "IN VINO
VERITAS."
133
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:15,947
Malory: AND THE CHIANTI WAS
DEFINITELY FLOWING...
AMONG OTHER THINGS.
134
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:18,516
Archer: MOTHER!
Malory: HMM? OH, UH, THIS IS
135
00:05:18,551 --> 00:05:21,619
THE LAST TIME YOU MAKE ME OUT A
FOOL, LEN TREXLER!
136
00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:23,121
YOU WANT TO PLAY ME HARD?
137
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,622
- Archer: PHRASING.
- Trexler: YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
138
00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:26,157
Malory: THEN YOU BETTER NUT UP.
139
00:05:26,192 --> 00:05:27,291
- Archer: PHRASING.
- Malory: ...BECAUSE I'VE
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00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,761
SWALLOWED JUST ABOUT AS MUCH AS
I CAN TAKE FROM YOU!
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00:05:29,796 --> 00:05:31,362
Archer: HEY! PHRASING!
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00:05:31,398 --> 00:05:35,233
Malory: ...AND WE'LL SEE
WHO'S SMIRKING WHEN ISIS STEALS
THAT DIAMOND FOR REAL!
143
00:05:35,268 --> 00:05:37,702
Trexler: [ INHALES SHARPLY ]
OOH, YOU'RE A NAUGHTY GIRL.
144
00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:38,936
Malory: RIGHT, THEN!
145
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:43,441
COMMENCE OPERATION "RUB LEN
TREXLER'S BIG FAT NOSE IN IT!"
146
00:05:43,476 --> 00:05:45,076
Archer: UGH.
SOUNDS LIKE YOU ALREADY HAVE.
147
00:05:45,111 --> 00:05:47,245
Lana: WAIT. YOU WANT US TO
BREAK BACK INTO THE PALACE,
148
00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:51,983
WHICH NOW HAS THE INSANE AMOUNT
OF SECURITY WE RECOMMENDED, PLUS
GOD KNOWS HOW MANY ODIN GUYS...
149
00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:53,718
Malory: YES, SO TAKE MORE OF
THAT POISON.
150
00:05:53,753 --> 00:05:56,121
Lana: ...AND ON TOP OF THAT
SUCK SALAD, YOU WANT TO SPRINKLE
151
00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:59,457
ON THE BACON BITS OF, "OH, HEY,
LET'S TELL THEM WE'RE COMING"?!
152
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,326
Malory: WELL?
Lana: WELL, THERE'S THIS NEW
153
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:03,361
THING CALLED THE ELEMENT OF
SURPRISE?
154
00:06:03,396 --> 00:06:05,263
Cyril: I'M SO SORRY I SLAMMED
YOU IN THE GUT.
155
00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:06,965
GEEZ, THAT'S HOW HOUDINI DIED.
156
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,400
Pam: HOUDINI DIED OF AIDS.
157
00:06:08,435 --> 00:06:10,268
Cyril: NO!
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS SAY THAT?
158
00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:12,437
AND THAT'S THE THING -- I WANT
TO SURPRISE LANA.
159
00:06:12,472 --> 00:06:14,072
Pam: WELL, YOU NAILED IT.
160
00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:18,877
Cyril: SO, THIS TIME, I NEED
YOU TO NOT BE YOUR NORMAL,
COMPULSIVELY BLABBY SELF.
161
00:06:18,912 --> 00:06:20,979
Pam: W-WHEN HAVE I EVER BEEN
BLABBY?
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00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:22,147
Jane: [ CRYING ]
163
00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:24,649
Pam: [ Singsong voice ] GUESS
WHO HAS BREAST CANCER.
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00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:26,184
Jane: [ SOBS ]
165
00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:30,755
Cyril: JUST ONE OF LIKE TWO
DOZEN EQUALLY APPALLING VIDEOS
ON YOUR WEBSITE.
166
00:06:30,790 --> 00:06:32,190
Pam: THEY'RE NOT ALL EQUALLY
167
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,492
APP-- OHH, AND HAVE I BLABBED
ABOUT YOU AND CHERYL?
168
00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:36,260
Cyril: SHE KEEPS SEDUCING ME!
169
00:06:36,296 --> 00:06:40,832
Pam: AND YOU THINK YOU CAN
MAKE THAT UNHAPPEN IF YOU GIVE
LANA A TINY FLAKE OF BROWN MICA?
170
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:41,866
CYRIL, LOOK AT IT!
171
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:43,768
Cyril: BUT I SPENT TWO
MONTHS' SALARY.
172
00:06:43,803 --> 00:06:45,770
Pam: I KNOW, BUT YOU MAKE
SHIT.
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00:06:45,805 --> 00:06:48,006
Cyril: HEY, I'M DOING PRETTY
WELL, THANK YOU.
174
00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:51,142
Pam: SAVE THE SPEECH FOR THE
FATHER YOU CONTINUALLY
DISAPPOINT.
175
00:06:51,177 --> 00:06:52,710
I'M HEAD OF H.R., CYRIL.
176
00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:53,878
I KNOW YOUR TAKE-HOME.
177
00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:56,281
Cyril: YEAH, AND I -- I --
178
00:06:56,316 --> 00:06:57,348
I TAKE HOME SHIT!
179
00:06:57,383 --> 00:06:59,016
Pam: WELL, WE ALL DO.
180
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:03,154
Cyril: BUT WHAT'S MY FATHER
EVER DONE THAT'S SO GREAT --
SCHOOL SUPERINTENDENT?!
181
00:07:03,189 --> 00:07:05,590
BIG WHOOP!
THERE'S ONLY LIKE 800 KIDS IN
182
00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:09,461
THE ENTIRE COUNTY,
"K" THROUGH 12!
183
00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:11,029
Pam: WOW.
Cyril: I'M SORRY.
184
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,096
UH, YOU WERE SAYING?
185
00:07:12,131 --> 00:07:13,431
Pam: I WERE SAYING, WE ALL
186
00:07:13,466 --> 00:07:16,201
MAKE SHIT, SO WHAT WE SHOULD DO
IS UNIONIZE!
187
00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:18,470
Cyril: YEAH!
I'LL GET THE RAISE I DESERVE.
188
00:07:18,505 --> 00:07:20,438
Pam: THEN YOU CAN BUY LANA A
BIG-BOY RING.
189
00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:22,440
Cyril: SHE'LL PROMPTLY AGREE
TO MARRY ME.
190
00:07:22,475 --> 00:07:24,409
Pam: THEN YOU CAN TAKE HER
HOME TO MEET YOUR DICK DAD.
191
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,811
Cyril: AND THEN I SHOVE HIS
HAWK FACE RIGHT INTO HER BIG
192
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:30,381
BROWN BOOBS AND SCREAM, "LOOK AT
THESE BABIES, OLD MAN!
193
00:07:30,416 --> 00:07:33,384
DIDN'T NEED A VARSITY LETTER TO
GET THOSE, DID I?!
194
00:07:33,419 --> 00:07:35,220
SO NOW WHO'S A DISAPPOINTMENT?!"
195
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:38,523
OH, JESUS H. JONES, PAM.
196
00:07:38,558 --> 00:07:40,325
Pam: WHAT?
197
00:07:42,595 --> 00:07:43,895
Malory: CAROL?
198
00:07:43,930 --> 00:07:44,863
CAROL?
199
00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:46,130
OH, WAIT.
200
00:07:46,165 --> 00:07:48,466
CHERYL? CHERYL?
201
00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:49,868
HELLO?
202
00:07:49,903 --> 00:07:53,905
CHERYL, I SWEAR TO GOD, IF I
HAVE TO OPEN MY OWN SALAD AGAIN,
203
00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:55,406
I WILL FREAK OUT!
204
00:07:55,441 --> 00:07:57,909
W-WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYBODY?
205
00:07:57,944 --> 00:08:00,178
Lana: SO, LET'S ASSUME WE
CAN'T ACCESS THE PALACE THROUGH
206
00:08:00,213 --> 00:08:01,279
THAT SAME SKYLIGHT.
207
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:02,547
Archer: OKAY.
208
00:08:02,582 --> 00:08:04,983
Lana: BUT MAYBE WE OVERLOOKED
AN AIR SHAFT, OR MAYBE EVEN SOME
209
00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:06,484
ACCESS BELOW GRADE.
Archer: UH.
210
00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:07,986
Lana: SO LET'S PULL UP THE
PALACE SCHEMATICS.
211
00:08:08,021 --> 00:08:10,088
Archer: UM, OKAY.
Lana: MAYBE TODAY...
212
00:08:10,123 --> 00:08:12,657
Archer: HANG ON.
Lana: ...IF THAT WORKS FOR YOU.
213
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:15,026
Archer: UM, LET ME SEE.
HOW ABOUT NOW? ANYTHING?
Lana: NO.
214
00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:16,661
Archer: UH, HOW ABOUT NOW?
Lana: NO.
215
00:08:16,696 --> 00:08:19,264
Archer: HOW ABOUT NOW?
Lana: NO. WHAT ARE YOU DOING
BACK THERE?
216
00:08:19,299 --> 00:08:20,298
Archer: I DON'T KNOW!
217
00:08:20,334 --> 00:08:22,200
Lana: WHAT ARE YOU -- JUST
HITTING RANDOM KEYS?
218
00:08:22,235 --> 00:08:23,268
Archer: WELL, OBVIOUSLY!
219
00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:25,770
Lana: OHH, DAMN IT, WE --
WHERE'S THE HOBBIT GUY?
220
00:08:25,805 --> 00:08:27,305
Archer: [ LAUGHS ]
A FRICKIN' HOBBIT WORKS HERE?
221
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:28,573
Lana: NO, HE'S JUST A --
222
00:08:28,608 --> 00:08:31,209
Archer: LANA, THEY'RE CALLED
"LITTLE PEOPLE," NOT "HOBBITS."
223
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,143
Lana: WILL YOU --
HE'S A HOBBIT ENTHUSIAST.
224
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,845
Archer: EW.
225
00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:36,814
Lana: YEAH, BUT HE ALSO KNOWS
HOW TO WORK ALL THE COMPUTERS
AND SATELLITES AND SHIT.
226
00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:39,984
Bilbo: BUT EVEN THOUGH I DO
ALL THAT, I GOT TO LIVE WITH A
227
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:41,185
ROOMMATE IN QUEENS.
228
00:08:41,220 --> 00:08:43,254
[ CROWD MURMURS ]
229
00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:45,023
Pam: ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF HOW
230
00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:47,258
UNDERPAID THE ISIS SUPPORT STAFF
REALLY IS.
231
00:08:47,293 --> 00:08:48,826
AND I, FOR ONE, AM FED UP!
232
00:08:48,861 --> 00:08:51,095
YEAH, FED FULL OF MUFFINS AND
DENIAL.
233
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:53,264
Pam: WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM,
NECK BONES?
234
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:56,801
MY PROBLEM IS, I REMEMBER
WHAT MS. ARCHER DID TO THE
CLEANING LADIES!
235
00:08:56,836 --> 00:08:58,436
YOU SURE, MISSUS?
236
00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,038
IS PLENTY OF SPACE.
237
00:09:00,073 --> 00:09:01,973
Malory: NO, GRACIAS.
238
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,208
OKAY.
239
00:09:04,243 --> 00:09:05,376
[ MACHINERY WHIRS ]
240
00:09:05,411 --> 00:09:06,578
[ CABLE SNAPS ]
241
00:09:06,613 --> 00:09:08,046
AAH!
242
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:09,113
[ CRASHES ]
243
00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:12,250
Malory: HA! HOW'S THAT FOR
BREAD AND ROSES?
244
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:13,952
OH, MY GOODNESS.
245
00:09:13,987 --> 00:09:15,119
Pam: YEAH, THAT WAS PRETTY SAD.
246
00:09:15,154 --> 00:09:16,154
WHAT'S SAD IS NOW NOBODY
247
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:17,589
RESTOCKS THE STUPID MACHINE IN
248
00:09:17,624 --> 00:09:20,124
THE BATHROOM, SO I HAVE TO MAKE
MY OWN TAMPONS.
249
00:09:20,159 --> 00:09:21,092
TAMPONS?
250
00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:23,094
WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS.
251
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:26,598
EXACTLY, AND SO I SAY NO UNION.
252
00:09:26,633 --> 00:09:29,200
YEAH!
Pam: NO, NO, NO, WAIT.
253
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:32,070
HUNH-UNH. DON'T LISTEN TO THE
"MAKES HER OWN TAMPONS" PERSON!
254
00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:33,438
Cyril: LISTEN TO YOUR HEARTS
255
00:09:33,473 --> 00:09:36,474
BECAUSE DEEP DOWN YOU KNOW
THEY'RE EXPLOITING US.
256
00:09:36,509 --> 00:09:40,044
BUT IF WE UNITE, WE CAN PUT A
STOP TO IT.
257
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:43,181
AND THAT SUPPLY CLOSET IS JUST
PACKED WITH POSTER BOARD AND
258
00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:46,117
MARKERS AND MAYBE EVEN SOME
GLITTER!
259
00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:48,219
SO, WHO'S WITH ME ON THE PICKET
LINE?!
260
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,722
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
261
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:51,789
AND ME!
262
00:09:51,824 --> 00:09:53,124
Cyril: REALLY?
263
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:55,093
YOU HAD ME AT "PUT."
264
00:09:55,128 --> 00:09:56,861
Lana: YES, WE NEED A SOUND
SENSOR.
265
00:09:56,896 --> 00:09:57,662
DUH!
266
00:09:57,697 --> 00:09:59,430
GOD, WHERE IS THAT EQUIPMENT
GUY?
267
00:09:59,465 --> 00:10:01,199
AND WHERE THE HELL ARE THE
JUMARS?
268
00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:03,968
Archer: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW.
THIS WAS ALL I COULD FIND.
269
00:10:04,003 --> 00:10:05,370
I'M THINKING GOGGLES -- YES.
270
00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:07,639
SHOVELS -- I DON'T KNOW HOW OR
WHY WE'D USE 'EM.
271
00:10:07,674 --> 00:10:08,439
Lana: OHH!
272
00:10:08,474 --> 00:10:09,440
Malory: CHERYL!
273
00:10:09,475 --> 00:10:10,908
Lana: SHE'S NOT IN HERE!
274
00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:12,510
Malory: WHY ARE YOU IN HERE?
275
00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:15,146
IS THE SAN MARINO DIAMOND IN
HERE NOW?
276
00:10:15,181 --> 00:10:16,648
Archer: IT MIGHT BE, FOR ALL
WE KNOW.
277
00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:19,150
Lana: WE CAN'T FIND ANY OF
THE GEAR WE NEED, WE'VE GOT NO
278
00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:21,052
SATCOMs, NO NEW INTEL, AND SO,
279
00:10:21,087 --> 00:10:24,255
BASICALLY, WE ARE TOTALLY
UNPREPARED FOR THIS MISSION!
280
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:26,524
Archer: UNLESS IT INVOLVES
NIGHT-SHOVELING.
281
00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:27,925
Malory: WELL, I WANT THAT
282
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:29,494
DIAMOND, NOT TO MENTION MY
283
00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:32,964
"RAPIDLY APPROACHING ROOM
TEMPERATURE" COBB SALAD, SO --
284
00:10:32,999 --> 00:10:35,800
DAMN IT.
WHERE THE HELL ARE ALL THE
DRONES?
285
00:10:35,835 --> 00:10:37,802
WHAT DO WE WANT?
All: UNFAIR!
286
00:10:37,837 --> 00:10:40,004
WHEN DO WE WANT IT?
All: CHANGE!
287
00:10:40,039 --> 00:10:43,808
Cyril: OKAY, SO THEY'RE BAD
CHANTERS, BUT OVERALL, THIS
STRIKE'S SHAPING UP.
288
00:10:43,843 --> 00:10:46,010
Pam: HOW?
NOBODY KNOWS WHY WE'RE STRIKING.
289
00:10:46,045 --> 00:10:49,681
Cyril: WELL, WE CAN'T SAY,
"HEY, RIGHT UPSTAIRS IS A
TOP SECRET INTELLIGENCE AGENCY."
290
00:10:49,716 --> 00:10:52,183
Pam: BUT IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE
PICKETING THE CLEANERS!
291
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:53,351
Cyril: NO, IT DOESN'T.
292
00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:54,419
Pam: JESUS!
293
00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:56,487
STOP PICKETING THE CLEANERS!
294
00:10:56,522 --> 00:10:57,989
Pam: YOU WERE SAYING?
295
00:10:58,024 --> 00:10:59,524
Lana: WHY ARE PEOPLE
PICKETING THE CLEANERS?
296
00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:00,925
Archer: I PREDICTED THIS.
297
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:02,260
IT'S CURRY FURY.
298
00:11:02,295 --> 00:11:04,128
Lana: HOLY SHIT.
IS THAT CYRIL?
299
00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:08,099
Archer: AND PAM, KRIEGER,
CAROL, ALL THE...
Malory: DRONES!
300
00:11:08,134 --> 00:11:10,668
THEY'RE NOT PICKETING THE
CLEANERS -- THEY'RE PICKETING
ISIS!
301
00:11:10,703 --> 00:11:12,236
Lana: WHAT'S THEIR BEEF?
302
00:11:12,271 --> 00:11:15,873
Malory: OH, THE SAME ENTITLED
CRAP AS ALWAYS -- "I CAN'T MAKE
ENDS MEET."
303
00:11:15,908 --> 00:11:17,608
"I'M ON FOOD STAMPS."
304
00:11:17,643 --> 00:11:20,344
"MY CHILD DIED BECAUSE I
COULDN'T AFFORD NEW BONE
305
00:11:20,379 --> 00:11:22,213
MARROW" -- JUST, "ME, ME, ME,
ME, ME!"
306
00:11:22,248 --> 00:11:24,048
Lana: JESUS, WHOSE KID DIED?
307
00:11:24,083 --> 00:11:25,216
Malory: OH, WHO REMEMBERS?
308
00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:26,117
CHECK PAM'S BLOG.
309
00:11:26,152 --> 00:11:27,251
Archer: AND DONE, BUT IF YOU
310
00:11:27,287 --> 00:11:29,320
STILL WANT US TO STEAL YOU THAT
GIGANTIC DIAMOND...
311
00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:30,521
Malory: WELL, OBVIOUSLY.
312
00:11:30,556 --> 00:11:32,857
Archer: ...WE'RE GONNA HAVE
TO CROSS THEIR PICKET LINE.
313
00:11:32,892 --> 00:11:34,592
[ GLASS SHATTERING ]
Lana: WELL, SCREW THAT.
314
00:11:34,627 --> 00:11:36,694
Archer: YEAH, WHAT'S WITH ALL
THE BOTTLES?
315
00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:38,429
IT'S LIKE A TRAILER-PARK EASTER.
316
00:11:38,464 --> 00:11:40,031
LOUSY COMMIES!
317
00:11:40,066 --> 00:11:41,466
GO BACK TO QUEBEC!
318
00:11:41,501 --> 00:11:42,533
Pam: JESUS!
319
00:11:42,568 --> 00:11:44,402
OKAY, STRIKE'S OVER, EVERYBODY.
320
00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,304
Cyril: NO, HOLD THAT LINE.
321
00:11:46,339 --> 00:11:49,807
WE DESERVE A RAISE, AND LANA
DESERVES A REAL RING, SO --
322
00:11:49,842 --> 00:11:50,741
AAH!
323
00:11:50,777 --> 00:11:52,410
Archer: OKAY, SO, LET'S GO
OUT THE BACK.
324
00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:54,278
[ BELL RINGS ]
Lana: OH, MY GOD!
325
00:11:54,313 --> 00:11:56,280
Archer: [ LAUGHS ]
HAPPY EASTER, CYRIL.
326
00:11:56,315 --> 00:11:57,215
Cyril: LANA.
327
00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:59,717
Lana: OH, BABY, WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOU?
328
00:11:59,752 --> 00:12:01,753
Cyril: WELL, SEE, I WANTED TO
BUY YOU A --
329
00:12:01,788 --> 00:12:03,821
Pam: CYRIL, THIS IS NOT THAT
MOMENT.
330
00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:05,890
Krieger: AND WE DON'T TALK TO
MANAGEMENT.
331
00:12:05,925 --> 00:12:06,958
OR HAM-FISTED WHORES.
332
00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:08,760
Lana: WHAT?
HMM?
333
00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:10,428
Cyril: YEAH, NO, THEY'RE RIGHT.
334
00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:12,463
- Lana: WHAT?!
- Cyril: NO, NOT THE WHORE
PART -- MANAGEMENT.
335
00:12:12,498 --> 00:12:14,432
Lana: BUT WE'RE NOT
TECHNICALLY MANAGEMENT.
336
00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:16,400
Pam: BUT YOU MAKE SHITLOADS
MORE THAN WE DO.
337
00:12:16,435 --> 00:12:18,436
Krieger: EVEN THOUGH YOU
TOTALLY DEPEND ON US.
338
00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:23,875
Archer: ON YOU?
HEY, WE'RE OUT THERE RISKING OUR
LIVES EVERY -- MANY OF THE DAYS!
339
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,676
Lana: AND SO, YES,
WE GET PAID A LITTLE MORE.
340
00:12:25,711 --> 00:12:27,378
Cyril: HOW MUCH A LITTLE MORE?
341
00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:28,679
Lana: WELL, IT'S COMPLICATED...
342
00:12:28,714 --> 00:12:30,481
Archer: NO, IT ISN'T.
DON'T ANSWER THAT!
343
00:12:30,516 --> 00:12:31,482
Lana: ...WHAT WITH SALARY AND
344
00:12:31,517 --> 00:12:33,384
PERFORMANCE INCENTIVES AND ALL
THE BONUSES.
345
00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:34,552
Cyril: BONUSES?!
346
00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:35,653
DUMP HER, CYRIL!
347
00:12:35,688 --> 00:12:37,588
Lana: HEY, CRAZY, GO MACRAME
SOME TAMPONS!
348
00:12:37,623 --> 00:12:39,791
OH, YOU WANT TO HEAR
SOMETHING CRAZY?
349
00:12:39,826 --> 00:12:40,958
CYRIL --
Cyril: THANK YOU, PAM.
350
00:12:40,993 --> 00:12:42,226
NOW LOOK, LANA --
351
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:45,096
Lana: BABY,
"TAKE CHARGE CYRIL" IS TOTALLY
DOING IT FOR ME.
352
00:12:45,131 --> 00:12:47,465
IT REALLY IS, BUT WE'RE ON A
VITAL MISSION HERE.
353
00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:48,533
Pam: VITAL MISSION?
354
00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:50,535
Bilbo: NOT ON THE MASTER
CLIPBOARD.
355
00:12:50,570 --> 00:12:52,537
Cyril: SO, JUST HOW VITAL IS IT?
356
00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:55,139
Malory: IT'S INCREDIBLY VITAL
BECAUSE IF THEY DON'T STEAL ME
357
00:12:55,174 --> 00:12:58,543
THAT HUGE DIAMOND, I WILL
LITERALLY DIE.
358
00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:00,611
Pam: A DIAMOND?
IN THIS ECONOMY?
359
00:13:00,646 --> 00:13:02,947
Cyril: YOU'RE STEALING A
DIAMOND FOR HER?
360
00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:03,948
Pam: OH, IRONY.
361
00:13:03,983 --> 00:13:05,683
Malory: AND THE REST OF YOU,
BACK TO WORK!
362
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:07,151
IF THAT SALAD ISN'T OPEN IN
THE NEXT--
363
00:13:07,186 --> 00:13:08,085
GET 'EM!
364
00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:09,453
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
Malory: OH! OH!
365
00:13:09,488 --> 00:13:10,554
Lana: HEY, HEY, WHOA!
366
00:13:10,589 --> 00:13:13,124
Archer: STOP SURGING!
Lana: ARCHER, DO SOMETHING!
367
00:13:13,159 --> 00:13:15,493
Archer: I AM DOING SOMETHING!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
368
00:13:15,528 --> 00:13:17,161
All: [ COUGHING ]
369
00:13:17,196 --> 00:13:21,032
Archer: LANA, OUT THE BACK!
MOVE!
HEY, CYRIL!
370
00:13:21,067 --> 00:13:24,202
CYRIL! CYRIL!
Cyril: WHAT?!
371
00:13:24,237 --> 00:13:26,537
Archer: I'M SAVING LANA, AS
USUAL!
372
00:13:26,572 --> 00:13:28,673
Cyril: HEY, SHUT UP!
373
00:13:33,613 --> 00:13:35,613
Archer: FRICKIN' ODIN.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
374
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,548
Lana: HOW MANY ARE THERE?
Archer: ABOUT A JILLION.
375
00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:40,218
Lana: DAMN IT.
Archer: A JILLION GAY LITTLE
COPYCATS.
376
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:42,854
Lana: WHAT?
Archer: I MEAN, I DIDN'T
INVENT THE TURTLENECK, LANA, BUT
377
00:13:42,889 --> 00:13:46,123
I WAS THE FIRST TO RECOGNIZE ITS
POTENTIAL AS A TACTICAL GARMENT.
378
00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:48,025
Lana: OHH.
Archer: THE TACTICAL
TURTLENECK, LANA.
379
00:13:48,060 --> 00:13:50,061
Lana: ARCHER.
Archer: THE "TACTLENECK."
380
00:13:50,096 --> 00:13:51,529
Lana: CAN YOU PLEASE FOCUS?
381
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:52,930
Archer: NOT REALLY.
382
00:13:52,965 --> 00:13:54,932
I DON'T THINK THESE GOGGLES WERE
PROPERLY CALIBRATED.
383
00:13:54,967 --> 00:13:58,169
Lana: DITTO THE SOUND SENSOR
AND THE STUPID CODE CLONER --
384
00:13:58,204 --> 00:14:00,004
ALL THE GEAR THOSE SWEATY TECH
DWEEBS NORMALLY --
385
00:14:00,039 --> 00:14:02,473
[ GASPS ] DO WE TAKE THE DRONES
FOR GRANTED?
386
00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:04,575
Archer: NO, NO, NO, LANA.
387
00:14:04,610 --> 00:14:06,510
DO NOT MAKE THIS ABOUT THEM.
388
00:14:06,545 --> 00:14:08,346
Malory: NO, NO, NO.
389
00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:10,214
THAT IS UTTERLY UNACCEPTABLE.
390
00:14:10,249 --> 00:14:12,283
Cyril: IT'S JUST A
COST-OF-LIVING ADJUSTMENT.
391
00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:13,784
Malory: IT'S STRONG-ARM ROBBERY!
392
00:14:13,819 --> 00:14:15,219
Pam: COME ON, MS. ARCHER.
393
00:14:15,254 --> 00:14:16,754
YOU'VE BEEN IN THERE 10 HOURS.
394
00:14:16,789 --> 00:14:18,222
MEET US HALFWAY, AND KRIEGER
395
00:14:18,257 --> 00:14:19,590
WILL LET YOU OUT OF THERE.
396
00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:22,159
Krieger: OR ELSE HE'LL CRANK
UP THE HEAT AGAIN!
397
00:14:22,194 --> 00:14:24,295
I LOVE THAT YOU KNOW HOW TO
DO THAT.
398
00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:28,599
Krieger: AND I LOVE THAT I
HAVE AN ERECTION THAT DIDN'T
INVOLVE HOMELESS PEOPLE.
399
00:14:28,634 --> 00:14:32,236
Pam: AND YOU'RE COOL WITH
KRIEGER SHUCKIN' YOUR SIDE CORN?
400
00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:34,472
Cyril: YEAH, THAT IS A HUGE
WIN-WIN FOR ME.
401
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:35,907
Pam: YOU HEAR THAT, MS. ARCHER?
402
00:14:35,942 --> 00:14:37,441
WE'RE ALL ON BOARD FOR THE BIG
403
00:14:37,476 --> 00:14:38,843
WIN-WIN OUT HERE!
404
00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:40,311
Malory: WELL, I'M NOT!
405
00:14:40,346 --> 00:14:41,479
DO YOUR WORST, KRIEGER!
406
00:14:41,514 --> 00:14:42,680
Krieger: OKAY.
407
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:44,181
OH, MY GOD, YES!
408
00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:45,316
Malory: YES, GO AHEAD!
409
00:14:45,351 --> 00:14:46,417
CRANK UP THE HEAT!
410
00:14:46,452 --> 00:14:48,653
I'M AS NAKED AS THE DAY I WAS
BORN!
411
00:14:48,688 --> 00:14:49,754
Pam: OH, EW.
412
00:14:49,789 --> 00:14:51,589
AND THAT IS NOT SO GREAT.
413
00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:54,191
Pam: NAKED OR NOT...
Cyril: DON'T KEEP SAYING IT.
414
00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:55,793
Pam: ...YOU CAN'T STAY IN
THERE FOREVER.
415
00:14:55,828 --> 00:14:57,795
Malory: HA! I'LL OUTLAST YOU!
416
00:14:57,830 --> 00:15:01,098
I'M NAKED, AND I'VE GOT HALF A
LIME AND ALMOST...
417
00:15:01,133 --> 00:15:02,533
[ INHALES SHARPLY ]
418
00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:04,468
NEARLY 2/3 OF A HALF-GALLON
419
00:15:04,503 --> 00:15:05,236
OF --
420
00:15:05,271 --> 00:15:06,871
[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
421
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:07,939
SHIT.
422
00:15:07,974 --> 00:15:09,674
Cyril: HA!
Pam: NOW WE GOT HER!
423
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:10,908
Malory: HA! I'LL SUCK IT
424
00:15:10,943 --> 00:15:12,743
STRAIGHT OFF THIS GRIMY LINOLEUM
425
00:15:12,778 --> 00:15:14,512
BEFORE I GIVE IN TO YOU
BELLYACHERS!
426
00:15:14,547 --> 00:15:16,280
YOU'VE GOT NOTHING!
427
00:15:16,315 --> 00:15:18,716
Lana: NO CODE CLONER, NO GPS.
428
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,851
UGH! WE'VE GOT NO THERMAL
IMAGING!
429
00:15:20,886 --> 00:15:22,486
Archer: LANA, WE DON'T NEED
GADGETS.
430
00:15:22,521 --> 00:15:24,689
Lana: OH, REALLY?
Archer: MACHINES ARE GONNA FAIL.
431
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:26,457
THEN THE SYSTEM'S GONNA FAIL.
432
00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:29,393
AND THEN IT'S "WHO HAS THE
ABILITY TO SURVIVE?"
433
00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:31,062
AND THAT'S THE GAME, LANA --
434
00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:33,364
SURVIVAL.
435
00:15:33,399 --> 00:15:35,399
Lana: JUST WATCHED
"DELIVERANCE" AGAIN, HUH?
436
00:15:35,434 --> 00:15:38,402
Archer: I MEAN, IS
BURT REYNOLDS NOT THE MAN IN
THAT?
437
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:40,171
ON THE RAFT...
438
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:42,940
WITH THE VEST, HUH?
Lana: [ SIGHS ]
439
00:15:42,975 --> 00:15:44,375
Archer: HE DID HIS OWN STUNTS.
440
00:15:44,410 --> 00:15:45,676
- Lana: I KNOW!
- Archer: Shh!
441
00:15:45,711 --> 00:15:47,144
Lana: HE DID HIS OWN STUNTS!
442
00:15:47,179 --> 00:15:48,980
Archer: Keep your frickin'
voice --
443
00:15:49,015 --> 00:15:51,682
AAH! GOD!
SWEET JESUS, THE GOGGLES!
444
00:15:51,717 --> 00:15:53,417
INTRUDERS!
GET THEM!
445
00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:55,286
[ SIREN WAILING, GUNFIRE ]
446
00:15:55,321 --> 00:15:56,387
Archer: AAH, LANA!
447
00:15:56,422 --> 00:15:57,555
- LANA, I'M BLIND!
- Lana: YEAH?
448
00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:59,757
Archer: I'M BLIND!
Lana: SHOULD I GO ON WITHOUT
YOU?
449
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:02,793
Archer: WHAT?
NO, CARRY ME, MONSTER-HANDS!
450
00:16:02,828 --> 00:16:04,796
[ WAILING CONTINUES ]
451
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:08,799
Archer: OW! OW! OW!
452
00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:10,735
JESUS! QUIT BOUNCING MY EYES!
453
00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:11,869
Lana: SHUT UP!
454
00:16:11,905 --> 00:16:14,171
I'M TRYING TO GET US AN EVAC,
BUT NOBODY'S ANSWER--
455
00:16:14,206 --> 00:16:16,674
OH, HOLY SHIT,
ARE THEY STILL ON STRIKE?
456
00:16:16,709 --> 00:16:18,042
Archer: HEY, EUGENE DEBS,
457
00:16:18,077 --> 00:16:20,911
IT'S ONLY BEEN ABOUT 10 HOURS,
ALL RIGHT?
458
00:16:20,946 --> 00:16:25,416
Cyril: SO YOU'D RATHER DIE IN
THERE THAN GIVE US A
COST-OF-LIVING ADJUSTMENT?
459
00:16:25,451 --> 00:16:27,618
Malory: YES!
460
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:29,120
Krieger: I CAN ARRANGE THAT.
461
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:30,187
CRUNCH!
462
00:16:30,222 --> 00:16:32,223
I LOVE THAT YOU KNOW HOW TO
DO THAT.
463
00:16:32,258 --> 00:16:35,459
Pam: WELL, NOW YOU'RE TRAPPED.
[ TELEPHONE RINGING ]
HAPPY?
464
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:37,161
Malory: YES!
Pam: AH!
465
00:16:37,196 --> 00:16:37,928
LAUNDRY.
466
00:16:37,963 --> 00:16:39,497
OH, WAIT, ARE WE OPEN?
467
00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:41,432
WHAT? SIR, YOU HAVE TO SLOW --
468
00:16:41,467 --> 00:16:43,501
GEEZY PETES, GET A LOAD OF THIS
GUY.
469
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:46,570
Lana: WE'RE TAKING HEAVY
FIRE, AND WE NEED A FRICKIN'
EXTRACTION, YOU DUMBASS!
470
00:16:46,605 --> 00:16:48,105
All: [ GASP ]
Cyril: LANA!
471
00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:49,707
Archer: [ LAUGHS ]
SHE THOUGHT YOU WERE A MAN.
472
00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:50,908
Lana: SHUT UP!
473
00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:53,511
CYRIL, BABY, WE'RE PINNED DOWN,
OKAY? WE NEED A -- AAH!
474
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:54,445
Cyril: LANA!
475
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:55,479
Malory: WHAT'S GOING ON?
476
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,781
Lana: WE NEED EVAC -- A HELO,
477
00:16:56,816 --> 00:16:57,748
A JUMP JET --
478
00:16:57,783 --> 00:16:59,383
Archer: UH, AT THIS POINT,
REALLY ANYTHING.
479
00:16:59,418 --> 00:17:01,318
Malory: WELL, DON'T JUST
STAND THERE, IDIOTS!
480
00:17:01,353 --> 00:17:03,054
Cyril: YEAH, COME ON!
GET 'EM OUT OF THERE!
481
00:17:03,089 --> 00:17:05,623
Bilbo: UH, YOU'D NEED THE
SATCOM LINK TO DO THAT.
482
00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:07,758
Cyril: SO?
Bilbo: SO IT'S UPSTAIRS.
483
00:17:07,793 --> 00:17:11,028
Krieger: AND, UH...
SOMEONE BROKE THE ELEVATOR.
484
00:17:11,063 --> 00:17:12,596
Pam: AND MISS FIRE HAZARD IN
485
00:17:12,631 --> 00:17:14,632
THERE BRICKED UP THE ONLY
STAIRWELL!
486
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:16,834
Malory: DON'T TALK TO ME
ABOUT FIRE HAZARDS.
487
00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:18,669
ALL YOU PEOPLE DID IN THERE WAS
SMOKE!
488
00:17:18,704 --> 00:17:20,471
[ GUNFIRE ]
Lana: AAH, GOD, I'M HIT!
489
00:17:20,506 --> 00:17:21,439
Archer: LANA!
490
00:17:21,474 --> 00:17:23,541
Cyril: WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE
DO SOMETHING?!
491
00:17:23,576 --> 00:17:25,309
Archer: LIKE WHAT, CYRIL?
I'M BLIND!
492
00:17:25,344 --> 00:17:26,710
Cyril: NO, US! HERE!
493
00:17:26,745 --> 00:17:27,645
Archer: OH!
494
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:28,879
Cyril: KRIEGER, BILBO,
COME ON --
495
00:17:28,914 --> 00:17:30,381
CAN'T YOU GUYS DO
SOMETHING?
496
00:17:30,416 --> 00:17:32,983
Krieger: WH-- NO!
497
00:17:33,018 --> 00:17:34,485
OH, WAIT, I MEANT "YES."
498
00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:36,554
[ BEEPING ]
499
00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:38,189
Bilbo: ROGER THAT, ZEBRA TWO.
500
00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:40,057
STAND BY.
HELO'S 10-4.
501
00:17:40,092 --> 00:17:43,861
HE JUST NEEDS YOU TO UPLOAD YOUR
GPS COORDINATES INTO HIS H.U.D.
502
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,464
Krieger: WHICH I WILL DO WITH
THESE CELLPHONES.
503
00:17:46,499 --> 00:17:48,799
[ BEEPS ]
Pam: HOLY SHIT.
YOU GEEKS ARE BADASS.
504
00:17:48,834 --> 00:17:51,602
Krieger: WELL, WE COULDN'T
HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT AN
ELECTRICAL INSULATOR, SO THANK
505
00:17:51,637 --> 00:17:54,472
CYRIL FOR THE TINY BROWN
DIAMOND.
506
00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:55,873
Lana: WHAT?
Archer: OH, WAIT.
507
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:57,908
LANA, DID WE GET THE DIAMOND?
Lana: WHAT? NO.
508
00:17:57,943 --> 00:18:00,044
BUT, CYRIL, WHY DID YOU HAVE A
DIAMOND?
509
00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:03,914
Cyril: OH, UH, JUST MY EAR
STUD, YOU KNOW, FROM COLLEGE.
510
00:18:03,949 --> 00:18:06,050
Lana: REALLY?
Archer: CALLED IT.
511
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:08,786
Krieger: AND, AGAIN, YOU DO
REALIZE IT'LL BE TOTALLY
DESTROYED IN THE PROCESS?
512
00:18:08,821 --> 00:18:11,455
Cyril: YES, JUST HURRY UP,
PLEASE!
513
00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:15,593
Krieger: OKAY, UPLOADING
GPS COORDINATE-- WAIT A SECOND.
514
00:18:15,628 --> 00:18:17,895
[ GUNFIRE ]
Lana: DAMN IT!
WE DON'T HAVE A SECOND!
515
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:19,964
Archer: LANA, I'M SURE WE
HAVE ONE SECOND.
516
00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:22,500
BUT, SERIOUSLY, IT DOES SOUND
LIKE WE'RE ABOUT TO BE OVERRUN.
517
00:18:22,535 --> 00:18:23,868
Malory: GET MY SON OUT OF THERE!
518
00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:25,803
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE
WAITING FOR?!
519
00:18:25,838 --> 00:18:29,106
Krieger: A GODDAMN
COST-OF-LIVING ADJUSTMENT!
520
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:30,774
Lana: WHAT?!
Pam: HEY, YEAH.
521
00:18:30,809 --> 00:18:32,910
Cyril: NO, KRIEGER, THIS IS
NOT THE TIME FOR THIS.
522
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:36,580
Krieger: IT IS EXACTLY THE TIME.
SO, WHAT'S IT GONNA BE, YOU
HARPY?
523
00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:39,850
YOU EVER WANT TO SEE YOUR SON
AGAIN?
524
00:18:39,885 --> 00:18:41,752
Malory: NOT AT THE NUMBER YOU
QUOTED ME.
525
00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:42,953
Archer: MOTHER!
526
00:18:42,988 --> 00:18:45,322
Cyril: THAT NUMBER IS PEGGED
TO THE CONSUMER PRICE INDEX!
527
00:18:45,357 --> 00:18:47,791
Malory: WHERE -- THE PEOPLE'S
REPUBLIC OF CANADA?
528
00:18:47,826 --> 00:18:50,928
[ GUNFIRE ]
Lana: JESUS, TAKE IT OUT OF
OUR BONUSES!
529
00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,663
Archer: WHAT? MOTHER, NO,
LISTEN TO ME.
530
00:18:52,698 --> 00:18:54,098
AAH! I'M HIT!
531
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,232
I'M HIT, AND I'M BLIND.
532
00:18:55,267 --> 00:18:58,302
Pam: JESUS, MS. ARCHER,
YOUR CHILD IS DYING.
533
00:18:58,337 --> 00:18:59,870
Malory: OH, ALL RIGHT.
534
00:18:59,905 --> 00:19:01,405
IF THEY'LL GIVE UP THEIR
BONUSES...
535
00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:02,639
Archer: MOTHER!
536
00:19:02,675 --> 00:19:05,509
Malory: ...YOU CAN HAVE YOUR
LOUSY COST-OF-LIVING ADJUSTMENT.
537
00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:06,911
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
538
00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:08,612
Pam: SOMETHING GOOD'S
HAPPENING!
539
00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:10,748
Krieger: AND YOU CAN HAVE
YOUR DICK SON BACK.
540
00:19:10,783 --> 00:19:11,549
[ BEEPING ]
541
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:14,318
[ ELECTRICITY HUMMING ]
542
00:19:14,353 --> 00:19:16,020
WHOA!
Malory: WHAT'S GOING ON?
543
00:19:16,055 --> 00:19:17,321
Archer: I HEAR A HELICOPTER!
544
00:19:17,356 --> 00:19:19,290
Cyril: OH, YEAH!
Archer: HOLY SHIT!
545
00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:21,158
MY OTHER SENSES ARE ALREADY
HEIGHTENED!
546
00:19:21,193 --> 00:19:23,260
Cyril: HEY, THIS TIME I SAVED
LANA.
547
00:19:23,295 --> 00:19:26,263
BUT, OH, GOD, PAM,
TWO MONTHS' SALARY.
548
00:19:26,298 --> 00:19:29,867
Pam: CYRIL, YOU CAN'T PUT A
PRICE ON GOOD PUSSY.
549
00:19:29,902 --> 00:19:31,735
Bilbo: ROGER THAT, ZEBRA TWO.
550
00:19:31,770 --> 00:19:33,737
HEY, THE HELO'S GOT 'EM!
THEY'RE SAFE!
551
00:19:33,772 --> 00:19:35,372
HOORAY.
WAY TO GO.
552
00:19:35,407 --> 00:19:38,142
Malory: THEN GET ME OUT OF
THIS SWEATBOX...
553
00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:42,012
[ LIGHT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS ]
554
00:19:42,047 --> 00:19:45,449
BECAUSE I AM OFFICIALLY OUT OF
GIN.
555
00:19:46,952 --> 00:19:48,686
Lana: OH, COME ON, ARCHER.
556
00:19:48,721 --> 00:19:50,054
NOT NOW. I'M SERIOUS.
557
00:19:50,089 --> 00:19:51,655
Archer: HEY, I'M SERIOUS.
558
00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:53,190
LOOK AT ME, SERIOUSLY, LANA.
559
00:19:53,225 --> 00:19:55,192
AND FORGET THE EYE BANDAGE, BUT
560
00:19:55,227 --> 00:19:57,828
THE HAIR, THE STRONG JAWLINE --
WHO DO I REMIND YOU OF?
561
00:19:57,863 --> 00:19:59,396
- Lana: NOBODY.
- Archer: SAY IT.
562
00:19:59,431 --> 00:20:00,664
Lana: PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME DO
THIS.
563
00:20:00,699 --> 00:20:02,032
- Archer: SAY IT.
- Lana: OHH.
564
00:20:02,067 --> 00:20:02,899
Archer: SAY IT!
565
00:20:02,935 --> 00:20:05,135
Lana: BURT REYNOLDS IN
"DELIVERANCE."
566
00:20:05,170 --> 00:20:07,538
Archer: NO, NOT IN
"DELIVERANCE"...
567
00:20:07,573 --> 00:20:08,405
[ CHUCKLES ]
568
00:20:08,440 --> 00:20:09,473
IN "GATOR"!
569
00:20:09,508 --> 00:20:10,574
Lana: OHH.
570
00:20:10,609 --> 00:20:12,143
Archer: RIGHT?
571
00:20:13,679 --> 00:20:16,047
HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT?
43191
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