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1
00:00:01,802 --> 00:00:04,303
Archer: SO I GET TO GO TO THE
FRENCH RIVIERA ON THE ISIS DIME
TO DO WHAT, EXACTLY?
2
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:07,272
Malory: LOCATE A STOLEN
SHIPMENT OF REDEYE MISSILES AND
3
00:00:07,308 --> 00:00:11,576
KILL THE ARMS DEALER TRYING TO
SELL THEM -- SPYRIDON SKORPIO.
4
00:00:11,611 --> 00:00:12,978
Archer: IS DIABETES BUSY?
5
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:15,113
Malory: DON'T UNDERESTIMATE
SKORPIO.
6
00:00:15,148 --> 00:00:17,148
THERE'S A REASON THE BOUNTY ON
HIM IS SO HIGH.
7
00:00:17,183 --> 00:00:19,150
Archer: LIKE HIGH ENOUGH TO
REDO MY KITCHEN?
8
00:00:19,186 --> 00:00:20,886
Malory: UGH! WHAT DID I TELL
YOU?
9
00:00:20,921 --> 00:00:23,956
Archer: THAT SALTILLO TILE IS
TERRIBLE FOR A KITCHEN BECAUSE
IT'S SO POROUS.
10
00:00:23,991 --> 00:00:26,158
Malory: AND MEXICAN
WHOREHOUSE-Y.
11
00:00:26,193 --> 00:00:27,859
SO I'M SURE YOUR COOK FEELS AT
HOME.
12
00:00:27,894 --> 00:00:28,993
Archer: PITA ISN'T A WHORE!
13
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:30,295
Malory: NOT UNTIL YOU GOT
AHOLD OF HER.
14
00:00:30,330 --> 00:00:31,629
- Archer: FIRST OF ALL --
- Malory: OH, SHUT UP!
15
00:00:31,665 --> 00:00:34,032
THE BOUNTY ON SKORPIO IS MORE
THAN ENOUGH FOR A NEW KITCHEN.
16
00:00:34,068 --> 00:00:35,600
Archer: I ALSO HAVE THE NOOK --
17
00:00:35,635 --> 00:00:40,105
Malory: AND THE REST YOU CAN
SET ASIDE FOR PITA'S INEVITABLE
MEDICAL EXPENSES.
18
00:00:40,140 --> 00:00:42,674
Archer: OH, LIKE, ONE TIME
THAT HAPPENED!
19
00:00:42,710 --> 00:00:45,243
IT'S PRETTY LATE, THOUGH.
WHY DON'T YOU, UH, TAKE A CAB?
20
00:00:45,278 --> 00:00:47,980
Pita: [ Mexican accent ]
MR. STERLING? I HAVE PROBLEM.
21
00:00:48,015 --> 00:00:49,214
Archer: I'LL PAY FOR IT.
22
00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:51,115
Pita: [ VOMITING ]
Archer: AGAIN?
23
00:00:51,151 --> 00:00:54,052
SERIOUSLY, PITA.
YOU'RE KILLING ME HERE.
24
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:55,119
AGAIN?!
25
00:00:55,155 --> 00:00:57,689
THIS WAS, UH, SUPPOSED TO BE
COCONUT SHRIMP.
26
00:00:57,724 --> 00:01:01,393
ONE, THREE TIMES.
BUT IT'S THE POPE'S FAULT SHE
WON'T LET ME WEAR A CONDOM.
27
00:01:01,428 --> 00:01:03,362
Malory: WHY DON'T YOU WEAR A
VASECTOMY?!
28
00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:05,564
Archer: THIS AGAIN?
DON'T YOU WANT A GRANDKID?
29
00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:08,232
Malory: WELL, IF I DID, I'D
JUST SCRAPE ALL YOUR PREVIOUS
30
00:01:08,268 --> 00:01:11,036
MISHAPS INTO A BIG PILE AND KNIT
A ONESIE FOR IT.
31
00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,036
Archer: JESUS CHRIST!
32
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,239
Malory: SORRY, I'VE BEEN
FASTING, AND I'M EDGY.
33
00:01:14,275 --> 00:01:15,373
Archer: STILL, THOUGH.
Malory: STERLING!
34
00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:16,641
Archer: OKAY.
35
00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:19,777
IF THERE'S MONEY LEFT AFTER THE
KITCHEN, THEN VASECTOMY MAYBE.
36
00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:21,647
Malory: SO YOU DO WANT THE
ASSIGNMENT.
37
00:01:21,682 --> 00:01:22,880
Archer: YEAH, I WANT IT!
38
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:24,683
Malory: YOU REALLY, REALLY,
REALLY WANT IT?
39
00:01:24,718 --> 00:01:25,917
Archer: YES. I REALLY WANT IT.
40
00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:27,819
Malory: WELL, TOO BAD.
BECAUSE GUESS WHAT.
41
00:01:27,855 --> 00:01:28,887
Lana: WOMP-WOMP!
42
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,855
Archer: WHY DOES SHE GET THE
MISSION?!
43
00:01:30,891 --> 00:01:31,923
Malory: BECAUSE I SAID SO.
44
00:01:31,958 --> 00:01:33,859
EITHER WAY, WE HAVE A PLANE TO
CATCH.
45
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:35,193
Archer: WE?!
WHY ARE YOU GOING?
46
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:38,397
Malory: I'M GOING TO, UM, A
CONFERENCE.
47
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:40,866
Archer: OH, WELL, ISN'T THAT
CONVENIENT?
48
00:01:40,901 --> 00:01:44,769
Lana: IF YOU THINK THAT'S
CONVENIENT, WAIT TILL YOU SEE MY
NEW KITCHEN.
49
00:01:44,804 --> 00:01:46,972
Malory: HA!
SERIOUSLY, THOUGH, YOU SHOULD
50
00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:48,607
LOOK THROUGH SOME OF
HER DESIGN CATALOGS.
51
00:02:20,107 --> 00:02:22,774
Cyril: SO, ZOOM, YOU'RE JUST
JETTING OFF TO FRANCE.
52
00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:24,042
ISN'T THAT KIND OF SUDDEN?
53
00:02:24,078 --> 00:02:27,045
Lana: NO, BABY.
SUDDEN IS WANTING TO MOVE IN
54
00:02:27,081 --> 00:02:28,613
WITH SOMEBODY AFTER ONLY FOUR
MONTHS.
55
00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:30,382
Cyril: TALKING!
JUST TALKING ABOUT IT.
56
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:34,719
YOU KNOW, I MEAN, GEEZ, I MOVED
IN WITH MY LAST GIRLFRIEND AFTER
FOUR WEEKS.
57
00:02:34,755 --> 00:02:36,488
Lana: WHAT ARE YOU, A
LESBIAN?
58
00:02:36,524 --> 00:02:39,190
Pam: WHY? WOULD YOU BE INTO
THAT? JUST CURIOUS.
59
00:02:39,226 --> 00:02:43,195
WHICH WAS AN ODD WORD CHOICE
RIGHT THERE, AND AM I TALKING
OUT LOUD?
60
00:02:43,230 --> 00:02:44,129
Malory: NOW REMEMBER.
61
00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:45,997
I WANT THE ENTIRE DATA SYSTEM ON
62
00:02:46,033 --> 00:02:49,868
THOSE NEW SERVERS, OR I WILL
JUST MAKE IT RAIN PINK SLIPS!
63
00:02:49,903 --> 00:02:51,470
FEAR IS A POOR MOTIVATOR.
64
00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:53,438
Cyril: LANA, I WANT YOU TO
CALL OR TEXT ME AT THE TOP OF
65
00:02:53,474 --> 00:02:55,907
EVERY HOUR, AND I'LL CALL OR
TEXT AT --
66
00:02:55,943 --> 00:02:58,076
Lana: YEAH, I'M GONNA BE KIND
OF BUSY, HON.
67
00:02:58,111 --> 00:02:59,611
Cyril: WELL, IT'S ALL ON THE
SCHEDULE.
68
00:02:59,647 --> 00:03:01,546
Lana: OH, NO, HONEY, THE
DOORS ARE CLOSING, AND I DIDN'T
69
00:03:01,581 --> 00:03:04,148
- GET THE --
- Archer: OH. SO CLOSE.
70
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:06,985
Lana: SO, YOUR CONFERENCE
WOULDN'T BE FOR CONTROL FREAKS
71
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:09,154
WHO HAVE TO MICROMANAGE
EVERYTHING, WOULD IT?
72
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,990
Malory: NO!
THAT'S NOT WHY I'M -- BUT, LOOK,
73
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,558
YOU BE CAREFUL WITH SKORPIO.
74
00:03:13,593 --> 00:03:15,159
HE WON'T HESITATE TO KILL YOU.
75
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,295
Lana: UNLESS I GET SMOTHERED
TO DEATH FIRST.
76
00:03:17,331 --> 00:03:19,164
Malory: OH, WELL, THAT'S JUST
PATHETIC.
77
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:21,366
BUT EVEN THOUGH CYRIL MAY BE
CLINGY --
78
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,401
Lana: OH, SARAN WRAP COULD
TAKE A LESSON.
79
00:03:23,436 --> 00:03:25,003
Malory: YOU USED TO COMPLAIN
80
00:03:25,039 --> 00:03:27,238
CONSTANTLY THAT STERLING WAS
EMOTIONALLY DISTANT.
81
00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:29,440
Lana: YEAH.
I WAS JUST BEING NICE, THOUGH.
82
00:03:29,475 --> 00:03:30,576
Malory: I WONDER IF HE'S LIKE
83
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:33,545
THAT BECAUSE I USED TO SPANK HIM
WITH A WOODEN SPOON.
84
00:03:33,580 --> 00:03:35,146
Lana: UH, YEAH, I DON'T KNOW
ABOUT THAT.
85
00:03:35,182 --> 00:03:37,382
BUT IT MIGHT EXPLAIN THE
PING-PONG PADDLE.
86
00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:38,383
MERCI!
87
00:03:38,418 --> 00:03:41,519
Malory: MY POINT IS, DEAR,
YOU CAN TRUST CYRIL.
88
00:03:41,554 --> 00:03:43,922
NOW, YOU GO HAVE A FUN
ASSASSINATION.
89
00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:45,089
Lana: UH, OKAY.
90
00:03:45,125 --> 00:03:47,259
UH, AND YOU GO HAVE FUN AT YOUR
THING.
91
00:03:47,294 --> 00:03:50,161
Malory: OH, I WILL.
BYE, DEAR.
92
00:03:50,197 --> 00:03:51,263
DID YOU RENT A BOAT?
93
00:03:51,298 --> 00:03:52,530
[ Russian accent ] DA!
94
00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:55,800
IS VERY PRETTY NICE BOAT.
95
00:03:55,835 --> 00:03:58,269
Malory: IT BETTER BE,
MR. SEX TAPE.
96
00:03:58,304 --> 00:04:00,071
AND YOU, SCUFF THAT LUGGAGE, AND
97
00:04:00,107 --> 00:04:02,341
I'LL CUT YOUR HAMSTRINGS FOR
YOU.
98
00:04:02,376 --> 00:04:05,009
Pam: YOU KNOW, I THINK WE'RE
MAKING SOME PROGRESS.
99
00:04:05,044 --> 00:04:06,211
WHERE? IN OPPOSITE WORLD?
100
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,179
WE'RE NEVER GONNA FINISH ALL
THIS.
101
00:04:08,214 --> 00:04:10,115
Pam: WE CAN IF CERTAIN PEOPLE
WOULD HELP.
102
00:04:10,150 --> 00:04:12,183
Krieger: I'M SORRY, ARE YOU
ADDRESSING ME?
103
00:04:12,218 --> 00:04:15,720
BECAUSE YOUR AUTHORITY IS NOT
RECOGNIZED IN FORT KICK-ASS.
104
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:18,522
UGH!
MR. ARCHER, YOU COULD HELP.
105
00:04:18,558 --> 00:04:20,192
Archer: HEY, I'M HELPING
CYRIL.
106
00:04:20,227 --> 00:04:21,226
TEXT HER AGAIN.
107
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,594
Cyril: I AM, IF YOU'D SHUT UP.
108
00:04:22,629 --> 00:04:24,462
Archer: AND REALLY POUR OUT
YOUR FEELINGS.
109
00:04:24,497 --> 00:04:26,464
Pam: DON'T LISTEN TO HIM.
HE'S JUST TRYING TO --
110
00:04:26,499 --> 00:04:29,334
Archer: SHUT UP!
CYRIL, BARE YOUR SOUL.
111
00:04:29,369 --> 00:04:33,371
SO, DID I SAY IS
NICE BOAT, OR WHAT?
112
00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:36,207
Malory: YES, NIKOLAI, YOU
CERTAINLY DID.
113
00:04:36,242 --> 00:04:41,012
WHICH HOPEFULLY EXPLAINS MY
SHOCK AT FINDING MYSELF ABOARD
THE CHUM GUZZLER!
114
00:04:41,047 --> 00:04:42,947
[ CHUCKLES ]
115
00:04:42,982 --> 00:04:44,348
I AM JUST GETTING THAT.
116
00:04:44,384 --> 00:04:46,851
Malory: WELL, I KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE NOT GETTING.
117
00:04:46,887 --> 00:04:48,219
Cyril: GIVE IT TO ME!
Pam: NO!
118
00:04:48,255 --> 00:04:50,555
Cyril: PAM, I'M SERIOUS!
GIVE ME MY PHONE!
119
00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:51,956
Pam: CYRIL, GODDAMN IT.
120
00:04:51,991 --> 00:04:53,057
YOU'RE SMOTHERING LANA.
121
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:54,759
Cyril: PAM, I WILL HIT YOU IN
THE FACE!
122
00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:56,061
OW!
123
00:04:56,096 --> 00:04:57,628
Archer: DON'T LISTEN TO HER,
CYRIL.
124
00:04:57,664 --> 00:05:01,266
YOU KNOW, IF THERE'S ONE THING
WOMEN TOTALLY LOVE, IT'S TO BE
SMOTHERED BY MEN.
125
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,001
[ CHUCKLES ]
LIKE YOU'D KNOW.
126
00:05:03,037 --> 00:05:04,335
Archer: OR CHOKED, IN YOUR
CASE.
127
00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:06,404
Pam: CYRIL, TRUST ME.
GIVE HER SOME SPACE.
128
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:07,839
Cyril: BUT WHY HASN'T SHE
CALLED?
129
00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:09,907
I MEAN, WHAT IF SHE'S IN DANGER
OR --
130
00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:13,211
Archer: CYRIL, COME ON!
WORST-CASE SCENARIO, HER COVER
131
00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:16,448
GOT BLOWN, AND SKORPIO'S RAPING
HER SENSELESS BEFORE HE CHOPS
132
00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:18,349
HER BATTERED CORPSE INTO FISH
FOOD.
133
00:05:18,385 --> 00:05:20,418
Cyril: OH, MY GOD.
Pam: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!
134
00:05:20,453 --> 00:05:22,487
Archer: WHAT? I SAID WORST-CASE.
135
00:05:22,522 --> 00:05:26,291
KROSHKรก, LEAVE THAT TO YOUR
FIELD AGENT.
136
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,393
WHY MUST YOU ALWAYS MICROMANAGE?
137
00:05:28,429 --> 00:05:29,995
Malory: I DON'T!
138
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:33,965
AND IF YOU WILL RECALL, I USED
TO BE AN EXCELLENT FIELD AGENT.
139
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:34,732
DA.
140
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,635
IS WHY I FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU.
141
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:41,205
Malory: MY GOD, KOLYA, WE
WERE SO YOUNG.
YOUNG. AND IN LOVE.
142
00:05:41,241 --> 00:05:42,840
AND IN BERLIN.
143
00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:47,278
Malory: ON THAT MAGICAL,
MOONLIT NIGHT, BENEATH THE
BRIDGE OF SPIES.
144
00:05:47,314 --> 00:05:51,215
THE NIGHT BEFORE YOU BREAK MY
HEART AND DISAPPEAR FOR NINE
MONTHS.
145
00:05:51,251 --> 00:05:55,787
Malory: KOLYA, THERE'S --
THERE'S SOMETHING I'VE BEEN
MEANING TO TELL YOU.
146
00:05:55,822 --> 00:05:58,123
[ SPUTTERS ]
WHAT IS IN THIS DRINK?!
147
00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:00,692
OH, SORRY.
IS ICE FROM COOLER.
148
00:06:00,727 --> 00:06:03,528
SOMEHOW IT GOT BUTTER ALL OVER
IT.
149
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:04,662
[ WOMAN SCREAMS ]
150
00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:06,965
HEY! DON'T BE QUEEN OF DRAMA.
151
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,000
Malory: THAT WASN'T ME, YOU
IDIOT!
152
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:10,802
[ WOMAN SCREAMING ]
153
00:06:10,837 --> 00:06:11,803
[ GASPS ]
154
00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:13,871
OH, DEAR GOD.
155
00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:14,939
Archer: CYRIL, STOP.
156
00:06:14,974 --> 00:06:16,441
Cyril: IT'S LANA.
HERE! GIVE ME!
157
00:06:16,476 --> 00:06:17,542
Archer: IT'S MY PHONE.
158
00:06:17,577 --> 00:06:19,010
PAM PUT YOURS IN THE BLENDER.
159
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,545
Pam: IT'S CALLED TOUGH LOVE,
CYRIL.
160
00:06:20,580 --> 00:06:22,881
Krieger: THE SECRET
INGREDIENT IS PHONE.
161
00:06:22,916 --> 00:06:24,749
Archer: MYELLO?
MOTHER?
162
00:06:24,784 --> 00:06:26,451
WHAT?!
REALLY?
163
00:06:26,486 --> 00:06:27,652
A-AND YOU'RE SURE IT WAS LANA?
164
00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:30,054
Cyril: WHAT WAS LANA?!
Archer: OKAY, I'M ON IT.
165
00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:32,424
Cyril: COME ON!
Archer: WHAT? YES.
GOD!
166
00:06:32,459 --> 00:06:33,424
Cyril: WHAT DID SHE SAY?
167
00:06:33,460 --> 00:06:35,961
Archer: WELL, SHE'S STILL
REALLY PRO-VASECTOMY.
168
00:06:35,996 --> 00:06:38,029
Cyril: ABOUT LANA!
Archer: OH, RIGHT. YEAH.
169
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:42,100
SO, UH, REMEMBER THAT WORST-CASE
SCENARIO WE TALKED ABOUT?
170
00:06:42,135 --> 00:06:43,735
Cyril: OH, MY GOD.
Krieger: YES, I REMEMBER!
171
00:06:43,770 --> 00:06:46,437
Cyril: ARCHER, IF ANYTHING --
Archer: CYRIL, RELAX.
172
00:06:46,472 --> 00:06:48,006
I WILL RESCUE HER.
173
00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:51,109
SO, KRIEGER, HOW'S ABOUT A
ROADIE?
174
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:57,315
Archer: BECAUSE IT WOULD BE
NICE TO KNOW WHAT KIND OF DANGER
I'M FACING HERE.
175
00:06:57,350 --> 00:06:59,651
Malory: WHAT DANGER?
THEY DO IT OUTPATIENT.
176
00:06:59,686 --> 00:07:02,219
Archer: WHA-- NOT THE VASECTOMY.
THE RESCUE.
177
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,357
Malory: HOW WOULD I KNOW?
I'M AT A CONFERENCE.
178
00:07:05,392 --> 00:07:08,326
Archer: WAIT A MINUTE.
Malory: YOU DON'T HAVE A
MINUTE!
179
00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:09,895
NOW, WILL YOU JUST PUT A LID ON
IT?!
180
00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:12,096
Archer: ALL RIGHT. I'M GOING.
GOD!
181
00:07:12,132 --> 00:07:13,398
SHITTY FLYING RATS!
182
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,100
Malory: JUST PUT THE DAMN LID
ON IT!
183
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:18,636
Archer: COMMENCE OPERATION
SOMETHING ABOUT I RESCUE LANA
184
00:07:18,672 --> 00:07:23,474
AND SHE BEGS ME TO TAKE HER
BACK, SO THEN CYRIL COMMITS
SUICIDE.
185
00:07:23,509 --> 00:07:26,278
SWEAR TO GOD I HAD SOMETHING
FOR THIS.
186
00:07:26,313 --> 00:07:27,512
Pam: SERIOUSLY.
187
00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:29,781
ARE YOU PEOPLE JUST BAILING ON
THIS WHOLE ASSIGNMENT OR WHAT?
188
00:07:29,816 --> 00:07:31,816
Cyril: WHO GIVES A GOSH DAMN
ABOUT THAT?!
189
00:07:31,851 --> 00:07:33,985
LANA'S CAPTURED, MAYBE EVEN --
190
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,788
Pam: RESCUED! KENNY CRYBABY!
COME ON!
191
00:07:36,823 --> 00:07:40,458
I BET MR. ARCHER ALREADY WENT
ALL DOUBLE-"O"-NINJA ON
SKORPIO'S ASS!
192
00:07:40,493 --> 00:07:43,028
Krieger: WHA-CHA!
KARATE SOUND.
193
00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:44,228
Cyril: YOU REALLY THINK SO?
194
00:07:44,263 --> 00:07:49,567
CYRIL, RIGHT THIS SECOND, I
BET HE'S UNTYING LANA, TAKING
195
00:07:49,603 --> 00:07:53,438
OFF HER BALL GAG, AND SHE'S
LOOKING UP INTO HIS STEELY BLUE
196
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:56,574
EYES AND PARTING HER MOIST
LIPS...
197
00:07:56,609 --> 00:07:58,242
Cyril: WAIT A MINUTE.
Pam: YEAH, HANG ON, CRAZY PANTS.
198
00:07:58,277 --> 00:07:59,644
Krieger: LET HER TALK, WOMAN!
199
00:07:59,679 --> 00:08:05,250
...AS HE TAKES HER IN HIS
RIPPLING RAMBO-Y ARMS, THROWS
HER DOWN...
200
00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:06,384
Cyril: OH, MY GOD!
201
00:08:06,419 --> 00:08:07,519
...AND THEN UNH, UNH!
202
00:08:07,554 --> 00:08:08,719
Cyril: [ CRYING ]
203
00:08:08,754 --> 00:08:10,621
YEAH! OH, YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT!
204
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,523
GIVE IT TO ME! UNH!
205
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:16,161
Pam: DAMN IT. LOOK WHAT YOU --
SHOULDN'T YOU BE OFF COOKING A
RABBIT SOMEWHERE?
206
00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:17,661
Krieger: I'VE GOT SOME IN THE
LAB.
207
00:08:17,697 --> 00:08:21,532
I MEAN, MAYBE IT'S NOT THAT.
BUT THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND
OUT.
208
00:08:21,568 --> 00:08:22,667
Cyril: GIVE ME THAT!
209
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:25,470
Archer: UGH. JESUS, GOD.
210
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,271
I THOUGHT I GAVE YOU A FAKE
NUMBER.
211
00:08:27,306 --> 00:08:28,706
Cyril: WHAT? ARCHER, IT'S ME.
212
00:08:28,741 --> 00:08:30,775
Archer: CYRIL?
HEY, I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW.
213
00:08:30,810 --> 00:08:32,610
Cyril: WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD,
MR. MAN!
214
00:08:32,645 --> 00:08:34,412
NOW, YOU JUST PUT LANA ON THE
PHONE.
215
00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:36,715
Archer: WELL, CYRIL, I CAN'T
REALLY DO THAT EITHER.
216
00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:38,850
Cyril: UH, HE SAYS HE CAN'T
PUT HER ON.
217
00:08:38,885 --> 00:08:43,354
[ GASPING ]
218
00:08:43,389 --> 00:08:45,323
Cyril: ARCHER, PUT HER ON THE
PHONE!
219
00:08:45,359 --> 00:08:49,160
Archer: CYRIL, BUDDY, LOOK.
WHEN I SEE HER, I WILL TELL HER
TO CALL YOU.
220
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:52,097
BUT I CAN'T FRICKIN' TALK RIGHT
NOW!
221
00:08:52,132 --> 00:08:54,732
Cyril: ARCHER? HELLO?
HE HUNG UP.
222
00:08:54,767 --> 00:08:56,067
PROBABLY 'CAUSE HE'S ALL...
223
00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:57,535
[ GRUNTING ]
224
00:08:57,571 --> 00:08:59,303
Cyril: OH, MY GOD!
I CAN'T BREATHE.
225
00:08:59,339 --> 00:09:01,439
[ CRYING ]
226
00:09:01,475 --> 00:09:04,675
Archer: [ GURGLING ]
227
00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,578
[ SCREAMING ]
228
00:09:06,613 --> 00:09:08,479
Cyril: [ CRYING ]
229
00:09:08,515 --> 00:09:11,916
Pam: AND THAT'S THE REASON I
DON'T HAVE SEX WITH MY
CO-WORKERS.
230
00:09:11,951 --> 00:09:14,051
THAT AND NO ONE EVER LETS ME.
231
00:09:14,086 --> 00:09:15,720
Krieger: I'VE HAD GOOD
RESULTS WITH ETHER.
232
00:09:15,755 --> 00:09:18,589
Cyril: [ WAILING ]
233
00:09:18,625 --> 00:09:21,159
Archer: [ GURGLING ]
234
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:28,700
Malory: OH, MY GOD.
NIKOLAI, SOMETHING'S WRONG!
235
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,335
IT'S JUST FAT DRIPPING FROM
KEBABS.
236
00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:33,805
Malory: NOT THAT!
KOLYA, MY PEOPLE NEED HELP!
237
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,141
DO YOU HAVE ANY KGB AGENTS
NEARBY?
238
00:09:36,176 --> 00:09:37,174
MEH...
239
00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,609
Malory: "MEH" WHAT?!
240
00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:44,415
I JUST DON'T FEEL SO
COMFORTABLE DISCUSSING KGB
OPERATIONS WITH YOU.
241
00:09:44,450 --> 00:09:46,217
Malory: I TELL YOU
EVERYTHING!
242
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:50,421
DA. BUT IS A LITTLE...
UNPROFESSIONAL.
243
00:09:50,457 --> 00:09:52,257
Archer: SWEAR TO GOD, LANA
244
00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:53,891
BETTER BE DEAD ON A SLAB OR
245
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:55,793
BEGGING FOR MERCY OVER A VAT OF
246
00:09:55,829 --> 00:09:58,596
ACID OR A SHARK TANK OR --
247
00:09:58,631 --> 00:10:01,165
DRINKING CHAMPAGNE IN A BIKINI?!
248
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:02,267
Lana: AH, SCREW ME!
249
00:10:02,302 --> 00:10:04,568
Skorpio: [ Greek accent ]
TWO MINUTES, MY LOVE!
250
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:08,907
I'M JUST NOW AGAIN RESHAVING MY
BALLS AGAIN!
251
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:12,443
Lana: FIRST OF ALL, YOU HAVE
NO RIGHT TO INTERFERE WITH MY
OPERATION!
252
00:10:12,478 --> 00:10:15,913
AND NOT THAT IT'S ANY OF YOUR
BEESWAX, BUT I DID NOT HAVE SEX
WITH SKORPIO!
253
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,482
- Archer: OH, REALLY?
- Lana: NO! GOD!
254
00:10:17,517 --> 00:10:20,117
I JUST KEPT PUTTING HIM OFF,
MAKING HIM RESHAVE HIS BALLS.
255
00:10:20,152 --> 00:10:22,120
Archer: AH.
SO YOU CAN HANG OUT ON A BOAT?
256
00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:23,622
Lana: IT'S A MEGA YACHT!
257
00:10:23,657 --> 00:10:27,025
AND I JUST -- [SIGHS]
I NEEDED A BREAK FROM CYRIL.
258
00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:30,628
Archer: WHO THINKS YOU GOT
CAPTURED OR KILLED.
WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?
259
00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:31,629
Lana: UM...
260
00:10:31,665 --> 00:10:33,964
[ SCREAMING ]
261
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,600
[ LAUGHS ]
262
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,835
OH, MY GOD!
263
00:10:37,870 --> 00:10:39,771
UH, I ACTUALLY FORGET WHAT THAT
WAS.
264
00:10:39,806 --> 00:10:41,639
I'VE BEEN HITTING THE SAUCE
PRETTY HARD.
265
00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:43,374
Archer: JESUS, YOU ARE SO
IRRESPONSIBLE.
266
00:10:43,409 --> 00:10:45,577
Lana: OH, REALLY?
GO ASK PITA WHO'S IRRESPONSIBLE.
267
00:10:45,612 --> 00:10:47,879
Archer: HEY, SHE KNEW THE JOB
WAS RISKY GOING IN.
268
00:10:47,914 --> 00:10:49,814
AND SINCE YOU DIDN'T DO YOUR
JOB --
269
00:10:49,849 --> 00:10:52,217
Lana: I WILL! ALL RIGHT?
JUST GIVE ME, LIKE, A WEEK.
270
00:10:52,252 --> 00:10:53,084
Archer: TOO LATE!
271
00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:54,886
YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE, AND YOU
BLEW IT.
272
00:10:54,921 --> 00:10:56,020
NOW, HOW'S MY DISGUISE?
273
00:10:56,055 --> 00:10:56,688
Lana: UH, IT DEPENDS.
274
00:10:56,723 --> 00:10:58,155
WHO ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE,
275
00:10:58,191 --> 00:11:02,459
TOPPER BOTTOMS, STERN YET
SENSUAL SKIPPER OF THE
U.S.S. ROUGH SERVICE?
276
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:03,394
[ LAUGHS ]
277
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:05,729
Archer: WHAT?
THEY'RE YOUR CLOTHES, IDIOT.
278
00:11:05,765 --> 00:11:07,465
Lana: UGH! DAMN IT.
279
00:11:07,501 --> 00:11:09,333
THAT WAS THE GUY IN CHARGE OF
THE CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN.
280
00:11:09,368 --> 00:11:11,002
Archer: THERE'S A CHOCOLATE
FOUNTAIN?
281
00:11:11,037 --> 00:11:13,537
Lana: OH, THERE'S EVERYTHING,
GREAT CHAMPAGNE, RIDICULOUS
282
00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:17,342
FOOD, A WHOLE, LIKE, SQUAD OF
HOT LITTLE FILIPINA MASSEUSES.
283
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:19,143
Archer: SKEET?
Lana: PROBABLY.
284
00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:23,147
AND I JUST REALLY NEED SOME "ME"
TIME BEFORE I HAVE TO GO BACK TO
CYRIL AND HIS WHOLE --
285
00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:25,449
Archer: CURIOUSLY OPPRESSIVE
BRAND OF LOVE?
286
00:11:25,485 --> 00:11:27,151
Lana: I MEAN, COME ON.
HAVEN'T I EARNED THAT?
287
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:29,420
Archer: YES, WE HAVE.
I'M STAYING.
288
00:11:29,455 --> 00:11:30,321
Lana: NO!
Archer: YES.
289
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:31,889
Lana: NO, YOU ARE NOT!
290
00:11:31,924 --> 00:11:35,426
Archer: YES, I AM, OR WOULD
YOU PREFER I TELL CYRIL YOU
SLEPT WITH SKORPIO?
291
00:11:35,461 --> 00:11:37,494
Lana: [ GASPS ]
EVEN YOU WOULDN'T STOOP THAT
LOW.
292
00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:40,398
Archer: LANA, COME ON.
THIS IS ME. REMEMBER?
293
00:11:40,434 --> 00:11:41,766
Lana: [ GROANS ]
294
00:11:41,801 --> 00:11:43,334
Malory: UNPROFESSIONAL?!
295
00:11:43,370 --> 00:11:45,102
FROM THE MAN WHO USED AN ENTIRE
296
00:11:45,137 --> 00:11:47,104
KGB SURVEILLANCE TEAM JUST TO
297
00:11:47,139 --> 00:11:48,673
MAKE A SEX TAPE OF ME?!
298
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:52,276
[ LAUGHS ]
AND ENTIRE KGB ART DEPARTMENT TO
299
00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:55,113
AIRBRUSH WRINKLES OFF YOUR
OLD ASS.
300
00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:58,016
Malory: I WANT TO LEAVE,
PLEASE, RIGHT NOW.
301
00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:02,286
SO WHO'S STOPPING YOU?
302
00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:03,487
[ GRUNTS ]
303
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,023
Skorpio: MMM.
304
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:08,258
SMILES, EVERYONE.
SMILES.
305
00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:11,162
FOR THIS PARTY, EVERYTHING MUST
306
00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:14,065
BE AS PERFECT AS MY BEAUTIFUL
COMPANION.
307
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:14,799
Lana: [ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]
308
00:12:14,834 --> 00:12:16,200
Skorpio: BECAUSE IN ONE HOUR,
309
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:17,902
THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS
310
00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:20,104
TERRORISTS WILL GATHER HERE ON
311
00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:24,909
THE ARGO TO BID ON MY HUMBLE
WARES.
312
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:26,544
WAIT! WAIT! YOU!
313
00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:31,315
CHOCOLATE-FOUNTAIN GUY, YOU
LOOK, UH...
314
00:12:31,350 --> 00:12:33,551
DIFFERENT.
Lana: [ GASPS ]
315
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:36,053
Archer: UM, I GUESS I'VE BEEN
WORKING OUT.
316
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:37,855
Skorpio: YES, I CAN SEE THAT.
317
00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:40,325
QUICK, BRING ME SOME DUCT TAPE.
318
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:43,261
Archer: I, UH --
Skorpio: BECAUSE THIS MALAKA
IS RIPPED!
319
00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:45,463
[ LAUGHTER ]
320
00:12:45,499 --> 00:12:47,064
COME, MY DEAR.
321
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,567
BEFORE THE PARTY, I MUST
RELAX...
322
00:12:49,603 --> 00:12:51,235
ON TOP OF YOU.
323
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,170
Lana: UGH.
324
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:53,804
Skorpio: NO EXCUSES, EH?
325
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:55,706
MY BALLS ARE SMOOTH.
326
00:12:55,742 --> 00:12:57,108
Lana: AND YOU KNOW I LOVE THAT.
327
00:12:57,143 --> 00:12:59,911
Skorpio: NOT AS MUCH AS I
LOVE CHOCOLATE.
328
00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:00,945
Lana: [ SHUDDERS ]
329
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:03,414
Skorpio: SO YOU, MALAKA,
330
00:13:03,449 --> 00:13:04,982
BRING PLENTY OF IT, YES.
331
00:13:05,018 --> 00:13:07,985
Archer: I-I WOULD PREFER NOT
TO.
332
00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:10,722
"BARTLEBY THE SCRIVENER"?
ANYBODY?
333
00:13:10,757 --> 00:13:13,391
NOT A BIG MELVILLE CROWD HERE,
HUH?
334
00:13:13,426 --> 00:13:15,126
HE'S NOT AN EASY READ.
335
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:17,729
Cyril: AND I DROVE HER RIGHT
INTO HIS ARMS.
336
00:13:17,764 --> 00:13:20,398
HIS BIG, TAN, MUSCLE-BULGEY
ARMS.
337
00:13:20,433 --> 00:13:22,667
Cyril: [ CRYING ]
Pam: CYRIL, COME ON.
338
00:13:22,702 --> 00:13:23,801
DON'T LISTEN TO --
339
00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:26,170
WHAT THE HELL'S YOUR NAME NOW,
ANYWAY?
340
00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:27,338
I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER.
341
00:13:27,374 --> 00:13:28,573
Pam: EXACTLY!
342
00:13:28,608 --> 00:13:32,143
Krieger: [ SNORTING ]
Pam: SO, WHAT YOU SNORTING
OFF ME?
343
00:13:32,178 --> 00:13:33,711
Krieger: IT'S MOSTLY MSG.
344
00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:35,613
Pam: THE FLAVOR ENHANCER!
345
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,047
WHICH YOU SO NEED.
346
00:13:37,082 --> 00:13:39,116
Pam: PIPE DOWN, PIPE CLEANER!
347
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:41,852
AND, CYRIL, IT'S A RESCUE
MISSION, OKAY?
348
00:13:41,887 --> 00:13:43,621
PROBABLY FRAUGHT WITH DANGER.
349
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,056
Cyril: YOU REALLY THINK SO?
350
00:13:45,091 --> 00:13:48,292
Pam: I BET THEY'RE FIGHTING
FOR THEIR LIVES.
351
00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:50,495
Lana: WOW.
352
00:13:50,530 --> 00:13:51,496
Archer: YEAH. THAT --
353
00:13:51,531 --> 00:13:54,097
Skorpio: [ CHUCKLES ]
354
00:13:54,133 --> 00:13:55,900
Archer: THAT GOT A LITTLE DARK.
355
00:13:57,904 --> 00:14:01,038
Skorpio: SO, NOW WE HAVE
CHAMPAGNE, HUH?
356
00:14:01,073 --> 00:14:03,340
Lana: UM, GOT ANYTHING A
LITTLE STRONGER?
357
00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:05,542
Archer: OR WAY STRONGER, LIKE
POISON?
358
00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:09,480
Skorpio: HMM.
I THINK I HAVE JUST THE THING.
359
00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:10,281
Archer: OH, MY GOD!
360
00:14:10,316 --> 00:14:11,749
Skorpio: READY THE SHARK TANK
361
00:14:11,784 --> 00:14:14,618
FOR MY GUESTS, AGENTS ARCHER AND
362
00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:16,720
KANE, OF ISIS!
363
00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:17,989
Lana: YOU KNEW THE WHOLE TIME?!
364
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:20,157
Skorpio: HOW YOU SAY...
WOMP-WOMP.
365
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,160
ALL RIGHT, YOU HEARD
MR. SKORPIO.
366
00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,929
Skorpio: NO, JUST "SKORPIO."
367
00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:27,798
REMEMBER HOW WE'RE DOING THAT
FROM NOW ON?
368
00:14:27,833 --> 00:14:28,633
SORRY, SIR.
369
00:14:28,668 --> 00:14:32,169
Archer: UH, HANG ON JUST ONE
SECOND.
370
00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:34,605
Skorpio: WHERE WAS THIS
ENTHUSIASM BEFORE?
371
00:14:34,641 --> 00:14:35,807
Lana: I KNOW, RIGHT?
372
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:37,408
NOW HE WANTS TO CONTRIBUTE.
373
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:39,277
Archer: [ LAUGHS ]
FUNNY.
374
00:14:39,312 --> 00:14:41,078
ACTUALLY, I'M GETTING THIS!
375
00:14:41,114 --> 00:14:42,780
OH, NO! GRENADE!
376
00:14:42,816 --> 00:14:44,515
Archer: I HAD SOMETHING FOR
THIS, TOO.
377
00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:46,150
UM...DAMN IT.
378
00:14:46,185 --> 00:14:49,020
EAT GRENADE, STUPIDS.
379
00:14:49,055 --> 00:14:51,823
Malory: OH, WELL, NOW WHAT?!
380
00:14:51,858 --> 00:14:54,225
UGH! ARE YOU STILL HERE?
381
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,559
Lana: WHERE'D YOU GET A
GRENADE?
382
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:56,894
Archer: HANGING FROM THE
LAMPSHADE.
383
00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:58,629
Lana: WAIT. WHAT?
[ GUNSHOTS ]
384
00:14:58,664 --> 00:14:59,597
Skorpio: [ COUGHING ]
385
00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:01,632
SOULATKA POUTANA!
386
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:04,068
Lana: WHAT?
DID HE JUST CALL ME A WHORE?!
387
00:15:04,103 --> 00:15:06,370
Archer: NOW, WHY ON EARTH
WOULD HE DO THAT?
388
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:09,974
BECAUSE HE TURNS WOMEN INTO
WHORES!
389
00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:12,243
JUST ASK HIS SLUTTY MEXICAN
COOK!
390
00:15:12,278 --> 00:15:13,677
Pam: OH, MY GOD! YES!
391
00:15:13,713 --> 00:15:15,145
WE SHOULD CALL HER!
392
00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:16,848
BECAUSE I WOULD LITERALLY MURDER
393
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:18,816
SOMEBODY FOR SOME MIGAS RIGHT
NOW.
394
00:15:18,851 --> 00:15:22,720
Krieger: EVERY SINGLE NOUN
AND VERB IN THAT SENTENCE
TOTALLY AROUSES ME.
395
00:15:22,756 --> 00:15:26,824
Pam: AND I AM SO OPEN TO THAT.
AND, CYRIL, IGNORE HER.
396
00:15:26,859 --> 00:15:30,728
NOTHING'S GOING ON BETWEEN
ARCHER AND LANA.
ALTHOUGH...
397
00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:32,697
Cyril: "ALTHOUGH" WHAT?
398
00:15:32,732 --> 00:15:37,501
Pam: WELL, EVERY ISIS AGENT
HAS A COMPANY-ISSUED
LIFE-INSURANCE POLICY.
399
00:15:37,536 --> 00:15:39,671
AND, UH...
Cyril: AND WHAT?!
400
00:15:40,973 --> 00:15:43,041
Archer: YOU'RE MY BENEFICIARY!
401
00:15:43,076 --> 00:15:44,408
Lana: YOUR WHAT?!
402
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,544
Archer: ON MY COMPANY LIFE
INSURANCE!
403
00:15:46,579 --> 00:15:48,112
Lana: OH, MY GOD!
404
00:15:48,148 --> 00:15:50,481
Archer: I MEAN, IF THIS GOES
TITS-UP...
405
00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:54,618
Lana: NOW? REALLY?
406
00:15:54,653 --> 00:15:55,786
Archer: OH, RIGHT!
407
00:15:55,822 --> 00:15:58,188
BECAUSE YOU WALKED INTO
STRIPPERS DISCOUNT WAREHOUSE AND
408
00:15:58,224 --> 00:16:00,458
SAID, "HELP ME SHOWCASE MY
INTELLECT."
409
00:16:00,493 --> 00:16:03,194
Lana: DISCOUNT?!
HELLO! THIS IS FIACCI!
410
00:16:03,229 --> 00:16:05,229
Archer: UH, I THINK IT'S
PRONOUNCED "KNOCK-OFF."
411
00:16:05,265 --> 00:16:06,129
UNH!
412
00:16:06,165 --> 00:16:07,298
Lana: UGH!
413
00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:11,468
RIGHT AFTER I GET BACK, I AM
CHANGING THAT STUPID POLICY!
414
00:16:11,503 --> 00:16:14,838
UGH! YES, YOU'RE MY BENEFICIARY.
415
00:16:14,874 --> 00:16:17,274
Archer: [ LAUGHS ]
HOW'D YOU GET LIFE INSURANCE?
416
00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:20,678
DON'T THEY KNOW YOU'RE IN THE
DANGER ZONE?
417
00:16:20,713 --> 00:16:23,014
Cyril: BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN
ANYTHING.
418
00:16:23,049 --> 00:16:25,749
THEY COULD'VE FORGOTTEN TO FILL
OUT NEW BENEFICIARY FORMS, OR --
419
00:16:25,784 --> 00:16:29,120
Pam: THEY HAVE TO UPDATE
THOSE "BENNIE" FORMS EVERY
QUARTER.
420
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:31,422
[ CHUCKLES ]
OUCH.
421
00:16:31,457 --> 00:16:33,891
Cyril: BUT THAT MEANS -- OH,
MY GOD!
422
00:16:33,927 --> 00:16:36,093
Krieger: DAMN ASS-HAMMERED
SHIT!
423
00:16:36,128 --> 00:16:38,262
Pam: WHAT?!
Krieger: BENEFITS!
424
00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:42,767
OH, I FORGOT TO SPEND THE
BALANCE IN MY GODDAMN FLEX
ACCOUNT!
425
00:16:42,802 --> 00:16:44,335
Pam: ARE YOU DATE OF
EMPLOYMENT OR --
426
00:16:44,370 --> 00:16:47,205
Krieger: CALENDAR YEAR!
OUCH.
427
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,040
Cyril: THAT'S JUST LEAVING
MONEY ON THE TABLE.
HOW DID YOU FORGET THAT?
428
00:16:50,076 --> 00:16:53,844
Krieger: I GUESS I WAS BUSY
FANTASIZING ABOUT ARCHER AND
LANA HAVING INTERCOURSE.
429
00:16:53,879 --> 00:16:55,012
Cyril: [ WAILING ]
430
00:16:55,047 --> 00:16:55,880
OUCH.
431
00:16:55,915 --> 00:17:00,017
Pam: CYRIL, COME ON, HON.
WE ALL WERE.
432
00:17:00,052 --> 00:17:02,320
Archer: AND YOU EXPECT ME TO
BELIEVE THAT.
433
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:06,190
Lana: I DON'T CARE!
JUST LIKE I DON'T EVER THINK
ABOUT YOU!
434
00:17:06,225 --> 00:17:08,092
RELOADING!
Archer: FIRING.
435
00:17:08,127 --> 00:17:10,327
SO, WHEN YOU FILLED OUT YOUR
INSURANCE FORMS, YOU WEREN'T
436
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:11,762
THINKING ABOUT MY TAN, MUSCULAR
437
00:17:11,798 --> 00:17:15,165
ARMS OR MY ASS IN THE
COMBAT-FIRING STANCE?
438
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,202
Lana: NO! I WASN'T!
I DON'T!
439
00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:19,337
I MEAN, I'M --
440
00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:21,672
Archer: SO FULL OF SHIT, YOUR
EYES ARE BROWN.
441
00:17:24,844 --> 00:17:27,477
NO, THEY'RE -- OH, MY GOD.
442
00:17:27,513 --> 00:17:30,681
THEY'RE GREEN.
LIKE EMERALDS.
443
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:33,150
HOW DID I NEVER SEE THAT?
LANA, YOUR EYES ARE AMAZING.
444
00:17:33,185 --> 00:17:36,153
Lana: ARCHER --
Archer: I MEAN, NOT COMPARED
TO YOUR TITS, BUT --
445
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:37,922
OW! OH!
446
00:17:37,957 --> 00:17:39,523
WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!
447
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:41,692
Lana: YOU!
AND PLUS, I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!
448
00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:44,562
Archer: OH, RIGHT.
HOW COULD I FORGET MR. CLING?
449
00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:45,796
[ GRUNTING ]
450
00:17:45,831 --> 00:17:48,732
Pam: CYRIL!
CYRIL, COME ON! LET GO!
451
00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:49,666
[ GRUNTS ]
452
00:17:49,702 --> 00:17:52,236
GOD, HE'S STRONGER THAN HE
LOOKS!
453
00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:54,905
Krieger: GET HIM OUT OF HERE!
454
00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:59,977
BECAUSE THESE CORPORATE
BAGMUNCHERS OWE ME $630 FOR MY
455
00:18:00,012 --> 00:18:03,147
GODDAMN FLEX ACCOUNT!
456
00:18:03,182 --> 00:18:06,250
Archer: UGH!
I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU SHOT ME!
457
00:18:06,285 --> 00:18:08,218
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I HATE THAT!
458
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:09,586
Lana: YEAH, WELL, YOU BETTER
GET USED TO IT!
459
00:18:09,621 --> 00:18:12,089
Skorpio: KILL THEM,
YOU FOOLS! KILL THEM!
460
00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:13,123
Lana: OH, MY GOD.
461
00:18:13,159 --> 00:18:14,392
I AM GONNA DIE, AND YOU ARE THE
462
00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:15,792
LAST MAN I WAS IN BED WITH.
463
00:18:15,828 --> 00:18:17,127
Archer: WELL, ONE OF THEM.
464
00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:18,895
DON'T WORRY. I WON'T TELL CYRIL.
465
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,432
PROBABLY.
[ GUN CLICKS ]
466
00:18:21,467 --> 00:18:22,699
Lana: SHIT! I'M OUT OF AMMO!
467
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:24,335
ARCHER!
Archer: LANA!
468
00:18:24,370 --> 00:18:26,837
LANA, DO YOU TRUST ME?!
Lana: WHAT? NO!
469
00:18:26,872 --> 00:18:27,972
I DON'T TRUST YOU!
470
00:18:28,007 --> 00:18:30,875
Archer: WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD.
BECAUSE GUESS WHAT.
471
00:18:35,315 --> 00:18:36,781
Malory: OH, MY GOD!
472
00:18:36,816 --> 00:18:38,915
NIKOLAI! OUR SON!
473
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:40,284
OUR WHAT?!
474
00:18:40,319 --> 00:18:42,152
Malory: OH, SO, REMEMBER THAT
475
00:18:42,187 --> 00:18:44,455
LITTLE SOMETHING I WANTED TO
TELL YOU?
476
00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:46,457
A "LITTLE SOMETHING"?
477
00:18:46,492 --> 00:18:50,527
OH, THAT IS JUST CLASSIC YOU!
478
00:18:50,562 --> 00:18:51,962
Malory: SO I'M A LITTLE LATE.
479
00:18:51,997 --> 00:18:53,530
A LOT LATE!
480
00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:56,967
NO ONE COULD HAVE SURVIVED THAT.
481
00:18:57,003 --> 00:18:59,003
Archer: OH, MAN!
482
00:18:59,038 --> 00:19:00,604
WHOO!
483
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,807
I AM AWESOME!
484
00:19:02,842 --> 00:19:05,976
Lana: UGH, AND IT JUST KEEPS
ON GETTING BETTER.
485
00:19:06,012 --> 00:19:08,045
Archer: LANA?!
Lana: ASSHOLE?
486
00:19:08,081 --> 00:19:09,112
Archer: OH, MY GOD.
487
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:10,014
[ COUGHS ]
488
00:19:10,049 --> 00:19:12,483
WAS THAT NOT EPIC?
Lana: FIRST OF ALL --
489
00:19:12,518 --> 00:19:15,252
Malory: NIKOLAI, LOOK.
THEY'RE ALIVE!
490
00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:16,921
OH, THANK GOD!
491
00:19:16,956 --> 00:19:18,121
THANK GOD?!
492
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:19,190
FOR WHAT?!
493
00:19:19,225 --> 00:19:22,659
THE LYING WOMAN I RISKED MY
CAREER FOR?
494
00:19:22,694 --> 00:19:25,462
THE SON SHE DON'T TOLD ME OF?
495
00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:29,099
OR MAYBE MY DAMN SECURITY
DEPOSIT?
496
00:19:29,135 --> 00:19:31,369
Malory: PSH!
SECURITY DEPOSIT.
497
00:19:31,404 --> 00:19:33,403
WHAT WAS IT, A PAIR OF
FLIP-FLOPS?
498
00:19:33,439 --> 00:19:35,873
Archer: HALF THE BOUNTY.
COME ON, I DESERVE IT.
499
00:19:35,909 --> 00:19:38,642
Lana: HA! TOO BAD!
SO YOU CAN JUST PADDLE THAT HOLE
500
00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:41,445
IN YOUR FOOT RIGHT ON BACK TO
YOUR CHEESY MEXICAN KITCHEN.
501
00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:43,847
Archer: OH, I'LL GET A NEW
KITCHEN.
502
00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:45,516
BUT LET'S SEE
YOU GET A NEW BOYFRIEND
503
00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:47,117
AFTER I HAVE A LONG
TALK WITH CYRIL.
504
00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:49,487
Lana: HA!
ABOUT WHAT, EXACTLY?
505
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,622
HOW YOU CRIED DURING A TWO-MAN
THREESOME?
506
00:19:51,657 --> 00:19:54,892
Archer: WOODEN SPOONS ARE A
HUGE EMOTIONAL TRIGGER FOR ME,
LANA.
507
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:56,494
Lana: YEAH, AND NOW I KNOW.
508
00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:59,363
AND WHEN I TELL PAM, SO WILL
EVERYBODY IN THE OFFICE!
509
00:19:59,398 --> 00:20:01,398
Archer: OH, IS THAT HOW YOU
WANT TO PLAY IT?
510
00:20:01,433 --> 00:20:02,933
Lana: YEP!
Archer: FINE!
511
00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:04,301
KEEP YOUR STUPID BOUNTY, THEN.
512
00:20:04,336 --> 00:20:06,870
AND KEEP YOUR PATHETIC, CLINGY
BOYFRIEND.
513
00:20:06,906 --> 00:20:07,638
Lana: I WILL!
514
00:20:07,673 --> 00:20:09,673
OH, AND CYRIL MAY BE CLINGY, BUT
515
00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:11,809
AT LEAST I KNOW I CAN TRUST HIM!
516
00:20:11,844 --> 00:20:12,576
Cyril: OH, MY GOD.
517
00:20:12,611 --> 00:20:14,145
OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD!
518
00:20:14,180 --> 00:20:15,178
CYRIL, COME ON.
519
00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:16,514
SNAP OUT OF IT. SERIOUSLY.
520
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:18,882
IT'S NOT LIKE WE BURNED DOWN THE
MAINFRAME.
521
00:20:18,917 --> 00:20:20,184
YOU REALLY NEED TO RELAX.
522
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:21,051
Cyril: HOW?!
523
00:20:21,086 --> 00:20:23,220
MY LIFE IS RUINED!
AGAIN!
524
00:20:23,255 --> 00:20:26,223
LOOK, WHAT HAPPENS ON THIS
SCRATCHY GREEN OFFICE RUG STAYS
525
00:20:26,258 --> 00:20:28,525
ON THIS SCRATCHY GREEN OFFICE
RUG, OKAY?
526
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:31,195
Cyril: YOU MEAN THIS, WHAT WE
527
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,630
JUST DID...
528
00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:33,897
YOU'LL KEEP THIS OUR SECRET?
529
00:20:33,933 --> 00:20:35,599
YEAH. GOD!
530
00:20:35,634 --> 00:20:37,934
CYRIL, YOU CAN TRUST ME.
531
00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:40,037
YOU KNOW, PROBABLY.
532
00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:41,705
Cyril: WHA-- PROBABLY?!
533
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:43,074
WOMP-WOMP.
40258
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