Original subtitles

Ladies and gentlemen, she is Mo Shun-kuan.

He is Andy Lau.

The Eastern China Flood of 1991…

destroyed numerous of homes and acres of crops.

Hong Kong citizens thus offered great help immediately.

For us, the filmmakers,

we’d like to offer our support through making this film,

“The Banquet”

We made this film speedily.

It is an unprecedented collaboration among filmmakers.

Now, this film is finished and shown today.

Thank you for viewing, and we wish to take this chance,

to wish you all the best for being kind-hearted.

Ladies and gentlemen, “The Banquet”,

For disaster relief, now begins.

It’s a Rolls Royce, great!

Boss, here we are.

Mind my business!

You should have sprayed it earlier.

Of course!

I am not buying this, no…

You bastards!

Boss, let me tell you my analysis.

In the auction held yesterday, you bought this building.

Hung Tai-bo bought the one at the end of the street.

But there are 4 buildings in between.

If we can get all these four buildings,

we can make big money!

I know, but what's next?

This is why I take you here.

The owners of these 4 buildings are having breakfast here.

Who are they?

Look! See those two old men over there?

There are many old men.

The guy who is eating chicken feet and the one who is eating chicken roll.

They are the owners of these 2 buildings.

Are you sure? That’s right.

Chicken feet and chicken roll?

That’s right.

Chicken feet and chicken roll, here you are.

We haven’t made that order. Take them away.

Are you kidding me?

Nuts! You moron!

How does she know you’re a moron?

It’s not difficult to tell.

Go ahead.

And the owners of these 2 buildings, guess where they are.

Where are they? Over there.

The left one is eating roast pork bun and the right one is eating lotus seed bun.

Pork bun and lotus seed bun? That’s right.

Pork bun and lotus seed bun, here you are.

I want chestnut cake, please take them away.

You want chestnut cake? Go to Hilton.

This is Regent.

You name this tiny restaurant as Regent?

That’s right.

Boss, I know one in Happy Valley, that’s even worse,

That is named Mandarin.

You don’t want it? I'll take it.

What is the name?

Mandarin.

My friends, let me remind you,

If you don’t order food, the tea price will be doubled.

Okay, stop singing please.

Don’t forget, no food, double tea price.

Leave us alone please. Boss, let’s go on.

We should get this done before Hung takes any action.

Don’t worry.

Hung will not get up this early.

Of course, you know him better than I do.

Let’s take action now.

Hello…

You must be Uncle Chicken Feet and Uncle Chicken Roll.

My name is Chicken Feet and he is Chicken Roll.

Who are you?

I am Mario Tsang, the director of Tsang’s Property Ltd.

I know that you are the owners of two buildings.

Would you like to sell them to me?

Could you tell me what price you have in mind?

The buildings are from our ancestors.

We won’t sell them.

We won’t sell them even you offer a high price to us.

Boss…

For those 2 buildings you said, we have fixed them.

We stuffed the ditches and cut all the cables.

We broke the stairs… people can no longer live there.

What have you just said?

We plan to run some brothels and gambling dens there.

Mind your tongue!

How dare you think of such bad deeds?

You know these two old men?

They contributed so much to our society before.

Now they have retired, enjoying life.

How can you give them hard time?

What a kind-hearted young man!

Uncle, not everyone has a kind heart.

This is a heartless moron! You know what?

If you give them hard times,

how can we tell others that...

we are planning to demolish those two buildings,

and to build free elderly homes, kindergarten

and free clinics for the public.

I have just been told.

Young man, we seldom see such a kind-hearted guy like you.

We plan to build a multi-story building for housing the old people.

Among them, I plan to give two stories to you.

One for you, Uncle Chicken Feet.

One for you, Uncle Chicken Roll.

They are free for you.

No!

You don’t want it?

We only need one story.

Ok, that’s the deal.

One is enough for us.

Jacky, give them the contracts.

No problem, boss.

About the price, that’s a good price.

All right… Okay…

I am in a hurry, please sign if there isn’t any question.

Let me buy you a drink later.

It's so kind of you!

I’ll bring you the floor plan later, it’s beautiful.

See you, see you…

Boss…

You slapped me heavily, see, it hurts.

Ask the driver to take you to hospital for stitching.

I’ll pay half of the medical fee.

It’s okay, it can be covered by insurance.

Boss, are you sure you'll give them a story for free?

If I build a charity block, yes, I will.

What if I build a mall? I will give them shit!

Boss, that’s Hung Tai-bo!

Why did he get up this early?

Boss, let me handle the contract first.

Uncles, it’s all right, please sign.

Brother Hung. Good morning.

Good morning? You mean good night, right?

What time is it now?

Early birds get more worms.

While you are sleeping,

I have already bought two buildings.

Oh my god! You always work by yourself, right?

Poor you!

My staff has already fixed another two for me.

Your staff?

Give way.

How is it going?

It’s done.

Thank you, Uncle Pork Bun, thank you, Uncle Lotus Seed Bun.

This is my boss, Mr. Hung Tai-bo.

Thank you. Thank you.

It’s fixed. Signed contract?

It’s fixed. Boss, it’s fixed.

Stupid! Didn’t you see Hung’s man here?

Boss, I didn’t see him.

Fatty. Yes, Big Fatty?

We both get two blocks.

With what we got from the auction, we both have 3 blocks.

It’s a tie.

Do I have to share half of my mall to him?

Mall?

No, he means the home for the elderly.

That will be named “Mall”

Boss, let’s discuss the construction plan, okay?

Come on…

Now, you have 3 blocks, and you have another 3.

Why not collaborate and build a 5-star hotel?

It can make all of us happy, okay?

No problem, my blocks are near the main street,

I’ll take 70% of the profit, the entrance should be on my side. Right.

To hell with you! You nuts!

I’ll take 70% of the profit, and the entrance should be on my side.

You are right.

So, forget it.

Wait…

Let’s make the entrance in the middle.

And make it a bigger one, for Fung Shui.

So we can make more money, you know?

Put a Chinese lion on the left, a tiny one.

It represents Mr. Tsang.

On the right, we’ll put an elephant, a big and strong one.

It’s as strong as you, Mr. Hung.

An elephant?

Let’s name the hotel “Lion Elephant Hotel”.

You’ll share the profit evenly, isn’t it a great idea?

This idea is good, “Lion Elephant Hotel”,

Lion is in front of the elephant, I like it.

You nuts!

I wanna teach you a lesson. No…

Mr. Hung, let’s talk outside. Come on…

Mr. Hung, you have only 3 blocks,

if you build a hotel by yourself,

It will be a 2.5-star hotel at most.

I won’t work with him.

You can have a 5-star hotel if only working with him.

Mr. Hung, for money!

Okay, for money’s sake, I’ll work with him.

That’s right.

But you know, he’s a bastard!

Of course we know.

Good news, it’s great! Boss…

It’s done, fair deal, fifty fifty.

You guys begin your hotel business now.

I mean Ho Tel Home for the Elderly.

Come on, two giants of the hotel business,

Shake hands, come on.

Shaking his stinky hands?

Great! Fair deal, it’s done now.

The business deal is done now, bosses,

How about my…

A red pocket for you.

Thank you, Mr. Hung. Let’s go.

You dwarf! Thank you… bye bye…

Mr. Tsang, how about my commission…

I was slapped.

Take this one, actually I prepared that one for you.

One more slap for you.

Thank you!

I bet it’s quite a big amount.

One thousand only?

Young man, you’re smart. $1,000 again?

Just a few words make you gain few thousands.

If you say more, you can get a house, can’t you?

Old man, I spent almost a year for this deal.

You think I am old?

I am sorry, kid!

All the old buildings are sold!

Who sold the building?

We have sold all the old buildings.

The four of you?

So, let’s celebrate it.

So this is your treat. Sure!

Waiter, take us some pork buns, we need to celebrate.

(Are you going to die?)

(If I die I become butterfly)

(Butterfly flying to the sky)

(Side by side Low and high)

(Stolen look... Stolen cry)

(I cry, you cry, everybody cries)

(Dai Lui Fa… )

(She said I have long…)

Wait… are you crazy? Why sing in Cantonese?

We should sing in English. Not my fault.

You should blame this lady.

She suddenly tuned to Cantonese.

No. She sung in Cantonese…

“Dai Lui Fa” is a name, you can’t translate it.

So you mean it’s a name, cannot be translated.

So, the name of the princess’s husband should be Kelvin then.

(Princess’ husband Kelvin becomes Popeye…)

You don't understand the characters, why not we exchange our roles?

I act as the Queen. Stop dreaming.

If two of you both act as the Queen, who will be the chick?

What is it?

The chick cries in the morning, then we start singing.

You nuts!

Okay, be serious, it’s for the charity show, come on.

Come on, let’s go ahead.

It’s okay…

Mr. Tsang, Mr. Tsang…

Mr. Tsang is rehearsing, please wait outside.

Go out, go out please.

Come for a job?

What? I know you have got a long contract, you bootlicker.

Please give me a cup of tea.

Me too.

(If I die I become butterfly)

(Butterfly flying to the sky)

You are his staff, how can you order his maid?

I think you are his employee too.

Wrong! I am a freelancer.

I choose to serve, highly rated, you know?

Mr. Tsang.

My boss is rehearsing, you’d better wait here.

What?

It’s a deal over a billion, why waiting?

A deal over a billion!

Over a billion?

Over a billion!

Over a billion? Over a billion?

Wai, replace me.

What?

I am not as talented as you are, boss.

We all know that.

We won’t be demanding, go now.

Go… Go!

What big business is it?

Let’s not talk right here. Come on.

Of course!

It’s a contract to rebuild Kuwait.

But we are busy in preparing a charity show.

Of course I know, but next week…

Prince Alibaba is coming to Hong Kong.

He is bringing a contract with him.

It’s worth over a billion, boss.

You must bring him to meet me.

I’ll fix him, then I will give you 10% as commission.

Of course! Of course!

But it’s hard to make that meeting.

He will only stay one day, he won’t attend meaningless meeting.

Think positively, I only need one night.

Everyone has a weak point.

If he doesn’t like woman, I’ll give him a man.

If he doesn’t like new things, I’ll send him antiques as gift.

No problem!

Of course!

I have already checked his schedule.

The information will be faxed to us right away.

Of course! Of course!

Here comes the fax…

What are you guys doing?

What are you doing? What’s up with you?

Mind your feet. What do you mean?

Sir, you sing terribly!

I can’t stand it, I won’t take your money.

Terrible? What do you mean?

If Mr. Tsang wants to contribute to the society, why not just donate money?

Stop! Go back home, go back to Africa.

Go back home for your Amalia!

Bye!

So what? Should we go on?

Forget it, the band has gone, let’s go.

Go… you all want to mess up!

You messed it up! Go…

Leave me alone, I have a big business waiting for me!

You messed it up, stop bothering me.

Give it to me.

Why does this man stare at the picture?

Don’t you know that? Let me teach you.

He is looking at his father’s picture.

Some time ago, his dad was killed by a bomb…

In time of a war.

He even moved to the graveyard to keep his dad company.

He is a filial son.

Filial…

Have you got an idea?

That’s his weak point!

Master. Master.

Remove the make-up now. Come on.

His weakness is being filial.

He loves watching his dad’s picture.

Then, I will send him a photo frame.

Bravo! What a brilliant idea!

But if he knows you are as filial as he is,

Wouldn’t that drag you guys closer?

Give me an example…

Let’s make use of your father.

Let’s hold a birthday party for your dad.

And to memorize his dad.

Shut up!

I’ve got it.

Let’s use my dad.

Let’s hold a birthday party for my dad.

And to memorize his dad.

This is to kill…

Kill two birds with one stone.

Bravo! Great!

Mr. Tsang has such a sound mind!

We didn’t even get it that fast!

We can’t get such brilliant ideas at all.

Therefore, you always ask me what’s next, what’s next?

Next thing is to use your brain! Got it?

Stop it, can’t you see me in a conversation?

Use your brain, okay?

You’re right, boss.

Boss, is your dad still alive?

This starts another problem.

The problem is, he is alive.

He is alive, and strong too.

But I haven’t seen him for a decade, I don’t even know where he is.

Find it out.

Ok, boss.

Honey…

Have you noticed any greeting cards sent from my dad?

Where did you put them?

Usually I put them in that drawer.

This drawer? Yes.

It’s empty!

Oh my God, do you still remember…

Have you noticed any sender’s address?

Where is he living now?

Something like Tai Hom Village.

Tai Hom Village? That’s right.

Oh no!

Hopeless… What’s it?

Tai Hom Village was burnt to ashes some years ago.

That’s right, many people died in the fire.

That means, father may have died in the fire.

You mean your father? No, he wasn’t killed in the fire.

He sent us card last year.

Really? That’s right.

Where is he living?

I guess it is Choi Hung Estate.

Thank you!

What’s up with you?

This is pretty!

Yes, it is.

What do you have in mind?

Well, I just want to bring someone home.

How dare you! You want to bring home a mistress?

I dare not.

I just want to bring my dad home.

You’re nonsense!

I told you that I wanted to raise a doggy last month.

You said no because you don’t want allergy.

You want to take your dad home?

I will get allergy too.

Honey, this is not true.

How can you compare my dad with the doggy?

We don’t have to spend money for taking my dad home.

Besides, we need him to aid us getting a big business.

What is it?

It’s really a big one, you know what?

I have got a connection…

From Iraq to Kuwait …

To rebuild the cities, the contract is worth over a billion.

It’s not kidding.

It’ll bring us a lot of money.

Now, I am making friends with him.

It’s such an awesome thing!

Millions of people there. You can buy many jewels.

You can buy whatever you like.

No matter what, we have to find him out.

We will get rich if we find him out.

Honey…

Honey, where are you?

I’ve got it, let’s go to sleep.

As you said, this is a chance.

So, let's take my dad home.

But he should leave after the party.

Sure, we won’t want to live with him for the rest of our lives.

Let’s go to sleep.

Let’s go find daddy early tomorrow morning.

That’s your dad, not my daddy.

But he is your father-in-law.

You told me that your father died.

After knowing the truth, before we got married,

you promised my dad that I don’t have to entertain your dad.

Don’t forget, my dad helped you to get what you have today.

Don’t forget, when your father went bankrupt and got stroke,

I gave him a great funeral!

Don’t give me hard time because of my family problem.

I beg you, okay?

Please go with me to take dad home.

This is possible.

What will you give me?

But you are my wife.

If the prince grants us the contract,

we will be damn rich, my money is yours.

No, better make a deal first.

I want half of your profit.

It’s okay.

But the price of the ring will be counted in your share.

You want a fair deal, don’t you?

Let’s go to sleep.

I just wonder, will it help for me to go with you?

Sincerity counts.

Oh, my expensive shoes!

Come on, buy one dozen later, okay?

I think we should go that way. Come on.

Why don’t you stop the car closer to the lift?

Walk and sweat…

It shows our sincerity.

Let’s go, with our greatest sincerity.

I don’t understand one thing.

Why do they play football here? Don’t have to work?

When I was small, I loved playing football.

I was a great player.

I could stop all the attacks.

I was only ten, but I was the tallest among the kids.

That’s why we should not be self satisfied.

Have you grown higher after ten?

Hey, kid…

Excuse me… Please.

Football? Pal, the ball please.

Please throw it to us. Please.

(Football playing is prohibited)

Uncle. Thank you.

What’s wrong? What’s up?

Hurry up! Go get it.

Honey, where is dad?

He went to the market.

Why don’t you get more sleep after the overnight work?

I just can’t sleep.

What's wrong with you?

You’ve got a big acne!

But you are thirty something, why having acne?

Can’t get acne after thirty?

Working over night is the main cause of it.

Dad went to buy salted fish.

He wants to make you a soup with salted fish.

And he’ll make minced pork with salted fish too. Good to your acne.

Thank you! Everything with salted fish!

That’s none of my business.

Gigi…

Gigi…

Gigi…

Gigi…

Gigi…

Oh my God!

Brother!

Honey, who’s here?

Brother?

Why putting a curtain here?

Where is your bell?

Why don’t you take us in?

Please come in…

Why don’t you turn on the air-conditioner?

It’s out of order, here is the fan.

Please don’t put it close to me.

Move it, move it.

Brother, why are you here?

I come for my dad.

He’s gone to the market.

Mind your tooth paste, give way please.

Right? All right.

See? Sincerity doesn’t count. The old man…

Hasn’t dad come home yet?

What made you come visit him?

I want to take him home and live with us for some days.

Wong, see my son on paper?

Come on, if he is going to take pictures next time,

ask him to stand up straight. He is too short.

I want you to see how smart he is.

Not to pay attention to his height.

So what? You’ve moved here for some years.

I haven’t seen him visiting you.

He is working so hard to make money.

That’s why he’s no time to visit me.

Did he invite you to his wedding?

He has his plan, maybe he thought that's not my business.

No matter what…

Your son should bring his wife to greet you.

This is what you’re thinking.

Dad. Dad.

Wong, my son comes home.

He is bringing his wife with him.

I shouldn’t have gossiped about him.

Mario. Dad.

This is my wife, Mimi.

Greet dad. Come on.

Dad.

Mimi, you look great!

Really?

I always see you on papers.

Mario, can you smell something bad?

Really?

Did you flush the toilet?

I haven’t used the toilet. Let me check it out.

It must be the smell of the salted fish.

It’s mildewed and fragrant, the best of all.

Please take it away.

Salted fish can cause cancer.

Take it away, please!

Dad, give it to me.

What? You'd come and take it.

Take a seat. She's not polite at all.

It’s okay.

Excuse us, the sitting room is too small.

Dad, let me close the gate.

Dad, I know I am not filial enough.

You have moved here for over ten years.

I haven’t visited you at all.

But…

You didn’t visit us even we lived somewhere else.

I am talking to dad.

I know you’re busy.

You have lots of entertainment. Yes…

Never mind, I know what you are doing.

I always read newspapers. Oh, dad...

I watched you on papers this morning.

Really? Let me take a look.

Didn’t I tell you to wear a red tie?

You didn’t listen to me, see? Hung looks better.

Come on, that’s a black and white picture.

Can you tell that’s a red tie?

It’s okay. You see this picture…

Let me cut and keep the news.

Go!

Mario, look!

I clipped all your news.

Including the news about your romance with Mimi.

Dad, you don’t have to keep it, if you like them,

I will ask my secretary to copy some for you.

Photocopy is not good.

Why? It’s not true copy.

That’s right.

Excuse me, do you have any tissue?

Toilet paper? Yes.

You give me this?

It’s not smooth enough, it will hurt my skin.

Isn’t it too shinny? Not used to it?

Come on!

Sister-in-law, why do you want to take dad home?

We want to hold a birthday party for him.

But he had his birthday two months ago.

Well, this is sort of extempore party.

If everything goes regularly, it’s not fun at all.

I think it is something extempore.

However, it’s such a rare chance.

Is there any toilet?

Please go outside.

It breaks my panty hose.

Why don’t you dump the broken stool?

It ruins my panty hose, you know?

How can brother live with her?

She comes from a rich family.

Forget it.

Still watching the clips? Let’s go.

Look at me, my panty hose breaks.

Oh my God. I want to go to toilet.

Isn’t the toilet stuffed? I’ll fix it.

Dad, I came here with Mimi because…

We want to take you home for some days with us.

To live with you?

Yes.

Dad, in all these years,

I haven’t been filial at all.

I didn’t take you to the peak.

I haven’t watched World Cup with you.

Actually, I have my hard time, you know?

What hard time is it?

Well, I don’t want to disclose too much.

But no matter what,

you have to live with us for a while.

Dad, right, let’s go.

I haven’t seen him this sincere before.

No, I won’t go with you.

Why?

You know I am used to living in housing estate.

I live slovenly.

If we live together, I will make you lose face.

No way. That’s right.

Just like Mimi.

She hates the smell of salted fish.

How can we live together?

No, forget it.

Are you looking for trouble?

It's serious, therefore I pushed you with a little force.

Honey, it smells good, isn’t it?

What is it called?

Sandalwood.

No wonder Chinese worship God with sandalwood.

No, this is mildewed and fragrant salted fish.

I see… It’s just the same.

After smelling for a while, it is…

Enough, if you like it, just take it home.

Take it home. Take it home.

Dad, no matter what, please go home with us.

No one thinks you’ll lose our face.

If my friend says it, he won’t be my friend anymore.

If my staff says it, I will fire him.

If my wife says it, I will get divorced with her.

But not this one, I love her.

What for? Why hitting me?

Let’s go, come on.

No. Give me a hand.

What is it?

Dad doesn’t know business, he can’t help you.

Come on!

Although he hasn’t come to visit us,

he wouldn’t have come because of money.

He isn’t that bad.

Dad, you know me very well.

But he won’t take you home for no reason.

Sure he has his agenda.

How about being filial?

Good, this is the perfect answer.

Mario, don’t lie to me.

What is it?

Dad, I don’t want to cheat you anymore.

The fact is…

Let me tell them.

He’s got cancer.

It’s because of eating salted fish.

The doctor suggests us to live with dad.

Hoping that his father’s love can cure him.

Oh my son…

His days are numbered, he’ll live three more months.

You nuts!

Doctor didn’t say I’d live three more months because of cancer.

The truth is one and a half month.

One and a half month only.

Dad, this is February, there are only 28 days.

What a short time!

I heard that patients with cancer look pale.

And they tremble a lot.

You know nothing, how old are you now?

I heard that cancer patients will lose hair.

He lost a lot of hair.

See, poor him!

Look, he looks pale and trembles a lot.

Mario! Dad!

Poor you!

We can’t help, I am ill-fated.

So you have to follow me home, to enjoy some days.

Okay. This is my last wish.

I will do whatever you wish.

Let’s go, dad.

Let’s go. Bye!

Bye…

Cancer…

Come on dad. Here we are.

This is my home.

This is just a small sitting room.

Mario.

You have to show me around.

Otherwise I will lose my way.

It’s okay, I can get you six dogs to guide your way.

Mrs. Tsang, boss.

This must be Mr. Tsang.

You are…

Please call me Wai.

Dad, whatever you want to eat or wear…

Just let him know.

Even a servant dresses decently,

you must be very rich.

He is just a junior staff.

That’s right.

This picture is expensive, isn’t it?

Who is he?

Can’t you tell it? It’s you!

Really?

I paid Zhang Daqian for it.

This is his only oil painting, it is precious!

Well, since we seldom visit you,

This paint can make us think of you.

Am I this smart?

This is your image deep in Mr. Tsang’s heart.

Yes, dad.

Since I was a kid,

you have been this handsome and smart to me.

Cut the crap, take some rest first.

Take master to his room.

Do you need a rest too?

Why should I take a rest?

Oh, my cancer!

Cancer? Let me help you.

Master, let me take you to your room.

Take Master to his room now.

What's wrong with you?

We could get the old man back only with that cancer trick.

Why did you grab my hair? It hurts!

I am so smart, right?

Otherwise, how can you make him trust you?

You think this is smart? I got this idea too.

I wanted to tell them you had Aids.

But I stopped that after a second thought.

Who gave you Aids? That’s me, of course.

Now, it’s done.

Everything can go smooth.

Not yet.

Why not? Isn’t it smooth?

Have you forgotten one thing?

Last time you competed for the chairmanship of the Property Chamber of Commerce,

you asked me to write an article,

that is to polish your family background.

It’s a nice article.

I wrote something about your dad.

Really? That’s right.

What did you write? Look.

Let me take a look.

I know where it is.

Why do you take it away?

Listen to me. I can't read it.

Mr. Tsang studied in England at his teenage.

He loved fencing after school.

He isn’t gentleman like, he doesn’t know fencing.

How come you put fencing there!

Why not just spitting?

Yes, I did write spitting too.

But now… Don’t worry…

Not many people read that article.

Its distribution is so small.

But the guests must have read it.

Let’s invite some other guests from other industries.

How about hiring an actor to act as your dad?

Not a good idea.

We can’t hire a real rich man.

The actor can’t be gentleman like too.

That guy may think of blackmailing me.

It’s risky that I may lose all my money.

What’d we do? Boss, I have an idea.

If you are willing to pay high price,

I can hire some specialists to train him.

Shut up, I have got an idea.

I can pay high price…

To hire some specialists.

To watch carefully…

Great idea!

Wait…

Why don’t you figure out such good idea for me?

We have only 3 days left, can we make it?

Better try our brest…

Try our best!

Money makes the world go round.

Does the world go round by itself?

Anyway, you take care of him.

If you fail, you’ll pay for it.

If you can make it, it’s worth to pay more money.

No problem!

Hello, is Lau there?

This is Jacky.

How about going a boat trip on this Sunday?

No? You’re invited to attend Mr. Tsang’s ball?

Sure, I am invited, are you kidding me?

But I am tired of going balls in these days.

How about Patrick, Simon and Wu?

Will they go too?

What? Ken, that jerk will go too?

All right, it depends, bye!

What the hell! Ken will go too?

But where is my invitation card?

Honey…

Honey…

Honey, it’s so nice of you.

I just wanna find out an invitation card,

you’ve been searching for it already.

All VIPs in this city will attend the ball.

If I am able to know some rich men there,

I will have good chance to make big money.

Where is it?

He won’t forget me, will he?

It’s me who figured out that idea for him.

Didn’t anyone answer the door when they sent me the card?

Honey, did you go out this morning?

Yes.

What’s wrong with you? Why did you go out this morning?

You’d have waited for the messenger!

The guy failed to send me invitation, it must be the case.

You’ve dragged me down!

Where did you go this morning?

I went to book air ticket.

Why didn’t you pick some other day instead?

You need to go to that party with me, you know?

I am going to USA, I want to go home.

I will not come back.

Honey…

Why are you losing temper now?

I am not losing my temper.

I want to break up with you.

Why do you want to break up with me?

Before my parents left us, what did you promise them?

You promised them to take care of me.

What now? You just care about your business and your bosses.

Honey!

Honey…

It hurts me so much!

But you care more about your invitation card.

The invitation card…

Yes! I said they didn’t forget me.

Ken even got the invitation card, there must be one for me.

Honey, I’ve made it!

Honey…

Boss, have some tea please.

Mr. Hung, Brother Curly Hair.

Hey, kid, do you wanna have your foot in both camps?

Come on! I am always loyal to you.

Therefore I came here.

I am here to bring you important news.

This is the best place with best Fung-shui!

What good news are you bringing?

Rebuild Kuwait, are you interested?

Can you make it?

This all depends on Mr. Hung’s sincerity.

Alibaba, Prince of Kuwait.

He is coming to Hong Kong to get a partner to rebuild Kuwait.

The contract is worth over a billion.

Over a billion!

How to contact him?

Well, about the connection…

Get the connection. Connected…

I’ve checked it out, Mr. Hung,

He will come on Saturday night.

He will only stay one night.

It’s easy!

I will prepare a big ball for him.

Mario Tsang is preparing a big ball for him too.

And he’s got a great idea to attract the prince.

What idea?

Mr. Hung, Brother Curly Hair is so smart.

What idea does he have?

He knows Alibaba is a filial son.

He loves to know filial friends too.

So Mario wants to make use of his dad.

He is preparing a birthday party.

Are you kidding me?

Before I was born, my dad died.

How can I hold a birthday party for my dad?

Take it easy, you need not hold a party for your dad.

Just pay enough money, you can count on me.

All guests will go to your side.

He will get no guests, his party will be ruined.

If you can fix this matter for me,

you will get a commission of 20%.

20%?

Too much for you?

No, I mean enough.

Enough. So, fix it now.

Count on me. Let’s go.

Bye, Brother Curly Hair.

20% for commission!

Young man.

You’re great!

I admire you too.

You say something and you get money.

You’ll be rich soon.

That’s right, after next week,

I will be damn rich!

Pork Bun…

Hey, girl,

They all want pork buns.

All right. Great!

But pay by yourself.

Do you want it?

No, thanks. No…

Pork Buns…

Simon, today, you’ve got a mission of glory.

Teach the old jerk walk like a gentleman.

Hey, let me remind you.

I am a gigolo, not a model.

It’s just the same, you’ve been trained.

How did your agent teach you?

Teach him whatever you’ve been trained

No way!

It’s okay!

Master.

This is Principal Yam.

The principal of Pretty Young Man Deportment Institute.

This is our Master.

This gentleman is hired to teach you manner.

How are you doing? How are you doing?

Yes, during the ball,

I think the guests are from the upper class.

Of course.

Let’s don’t waste time, first, I’ll teach you how to walk.

For our job, there is only one walking style.

I want your body.

Come on. Oh no!

Master, copy me.

All right.

No, master, it’s itchy!

Never mind, I know what you mean.

Then, I will teach you how to stare.

How to flatter your clients.

Flatter your clients?

What he means…

How to make the guests feel like home.

To be happy, that’s kind of manner.

I’ve got it.

After flattering the clients,

then, do some exercises.

Charge up, charge up, Master.

Work hard. Charge up!

Master gets tired.

Change position, master.

Change position. Okay…

Hurry up…

Come this way. Be careful!

Ready…

Master, again…

Work hard, master…

Work hard, charge up, master…

Work hard, charge up, master…

Master, you sweat much.

You’re almost there, master.

Again.

One, two, one, two…

Hi, my friend, are you lonely?

Dad… Dad.

Dad… Dad…

Dad!

Dad, how are you?

I ate too much oily food.

Cheese Fondue for breakfast.

Salted knuckle and braised pork for lunch.

Even robots will get diarrhoea.

Forget it.

I have made you something else.

Braised turtle and pig knuckle.

What? You’ll like it.

Just for tea break.

Eating such thing for tea break? Yes.

Can I say no?

No way! You did many exercises this morning with Wai.

You need to eat something nutritious.

About this topic, Mario, how about you?

You’ve got cancer, you need to eat something nutritious.

Dad, you know what?

We can’t cure cancer.

I will die sooner or later.

I just want to see one thing…

I want to see you staying healthy.

This will make me feel ease.

Mario, don’t give up easily.

Why not eat something nutritious instead?

It may help!

Dad, why don’t you eat something nutritious first?

Why not forget the spoon, come on!

You drink some… You first.

Master, I am here to give you an injection.

Stop drinking, it will cause diarrhoea again.

I am afraid of any injection!

Dad, just do it. It may help.

Tell me what it is.

This is something great!

It’s an extract from African elephants, whales and polar bears.

It will help you gaining weight.

It’s great, come on, let’s get it.

It will kill me!

Just one injection, please!

Come on, one injection per day.

You want me to take one a day?

Yes.

You’re killing me!

It’s quick, just one shot, come on.

It won’t hurt, come on.

Hold it, it’s quick, come on.

It’s quick. Come on…

Dad, what’s wrong with you?

His arm swells! Poor old man!

Is the medicine too strong for him?

Possible!

Oh no! I can't move my hand!

Can’t move?

Master, your daughter has come, waiting in the sitting room.

If she notices his wound, sure she will take him away.

You, you tell her that Master has gone out.

No way, I want to see her.

I have to tell her something.

You tell me, I’ll tell her.

No way…

Dad, don’t go.

No…

You’ve given me a big trouble!

Ask Mr. Leung to come up, I want to talk to him.

Go, I want to talk to him.

Your brother is a mean guy.

But I don’t think he will torture your dad.

I don’t think he’s got cancer.

Come on.

What made you come here?

Hi, Mimi.

I come here to see dad, where is he?

He is now bathing.

I bought an antique from auction last month.

It’s a pretty one, come on, let’s take a look.

Come on.

Hurry up!

Boss, I don’t think this is a good idea.

Just try it.

It swells, what a trouble!

Come on, it’s something nice.

Come this way.

About antique,

you have to check the details of the pattern.

I put one over there.

Let’s take a look of this one first.

How can you tell this an antique?

How old is it?

Oh, it’s old indeed!

Just take a look.

Dad is over there.

Dad, here you are.

Yes, yes.

Have you bathed? Yes.

Dad, are you happy here?

Sure.

Why do you cover with a blanket?

He doesn’t want to get cold after bath.

But you are sweating!

Really?

Not sweating anymore.

Dad, how come you wear two watches?

This is a birthday present from me.

It’s a gold watch.

Dad, other than greeting you,

we come here to let you sign an insurance policy.

Do you want to insure for him?

Yes, I’ve got a new job.

As an insurance agent.

It’s the company policy that I must get myself insured.

So the beneficiary is you. Please sign.

Pass it to me.

Sign it. Come on.

Sign here.

Look! Sign here, dad.

Dad, is there anything wrong with the policy?

No, nothing wrong.

It’s signed.

It’s fixed.

Thank you, Mimi.

Dad, your signature looks different.

I opened an account for dad in the Bank of Swiss.

This is his latest signature.

He will use this signature from now on.

That’s right…

Madam, the soup is ready.

Put it down.

Drink soup again?

Of course.

How about my hand?

I am used to feed you, dad.

Let me feed you as usual.

Yes, Dad,

Our neighbors know that Mario has got cancer.

They suggest him to drink some cockroach and rat wine.

Why do you bring these things to us?

That’s right, I got cancer.

Why do you take it to dad?

No, it’s for you.

For me?

Yes, Mario.

This is West Germany cockroaches in Scottish Whiskey.

This is wine with Wong Tau Hom rats.

Soaked in Bamboo Leaf Green Liquor.

It’s the best way to cure cancer together with doctor’s medicine.

I asked Uncle Fourteen to search it for you.

Master, how can you drink such thing?

Yes, patient can drink it.

But the point is, I don’t doubt the function of the wine.

I don’t trust Uncle Fourteen only.

You know, you will only live one month or more.

If you don’t drink it, you’ll die definitely.

If you drink it, you may be saved.

Since you asked me to do so, I can’t say no.

Just follow our family rules.

My wife will try the medicine for me.

So, Mimi, you drink first.

Are you sick? Yes, you are, but I am not sick!

You drink it.

For the family! Just try, no harm.

These wine is good to health anyway.

Just drink it. You dance for good health too.

Shut up. It’s good for health.

If you don’t drink the wine, I won’t drink the soup.

See? You’ve messed up.

What’d we do now?

You drink some, and I drink some.

All right, what a great time,

I haven’t ordered any drinks to you.

So, why not drink the wine together?

That’s right.

Bring us some bowls.

You want us to drink it too?

No, Uncle Fourteen said…

You must drink all to get you cured.

All right, they’re all yours.

Mario, wake up for the wine.

Come on, drink it… Come on!

Dad, let me feed you.

Wait, you drink the wine first.

I’ll drink it in my bedroom.

No, drink it now.

That’s too much! I’d piss right here.

Piss? That’s good!

Bad things will come out of your body with the urine.

Drink it.

Drink it. Come on.

Sure you want me to drink alone.

Come on.

Dad, let’s drink the soup.

Let him drink first.

He is drinking, see?

It’s disgusting! Really disgusting!

You have to drink it, finish it.

Drink it…

Come on!

It’s good! Come on.

You’re great!

How dare you yell at me?

Dad, your soup please.

Isn’t it delicious?

Drink it, don’t stop…

Stop it, the vomiting voice is disgusting!

By the way, the old man doesn’t gain much weight.

We must make him look fat and strong.

So I have got a plan.

Give him 5 nutritious soups a day, one injection.

It's a good idea, but…

If we give him nutritious food,

he will ask me to drink rat wine again!

If it is good to your health, why not?

Are you being kind-hearted?

No way!

Oh, feeling dizzy?

Don’t vomit on my Persian carpet.

OK, boys, listen to the class

A pen and a man

A man and a pen

A man and a man

Excuse me.

What do you want to ask?

Well, I know a little English.

I think you don’t need to teach me in this way.

Really?

I was a sailor before, I visited five continents before.

Really?

You just want to cheat some money, right?

Really!

I haven’t heard any other words except Really.

Isn’t it the standard answer?

Oh! Really!

Uncle Nine, you have a sacred mission this time.

Teach my boss’s dad playing sword.

Bravo, let’s start now.

That’s great.

What is it?

Western sword?

You mean fencing? Let’s go home.

Uncle Nine, let’s talk.

Isn’t fencing different from playing Chinese sword?

Are you crazy? Ask a foreigner to teach him fencing.

You know what I learnt?

It’s called “Scared Sword of Angel”.

Angel? I can tell it.

So, let’s go home.

Uncle Nine, you are a famous swordsman.

I don’t think it’s hard for you to teach…

It’s really different… Master.

This is Master Lau, president of Fencing Association.

We invite him to teach you fencing.

This man? That’s right.

Don’t you trust him?

Master Lau will show you his skills.

You should follow and play once later.

Master Lau, this way please.

OK, bring me the sword.

It’s a wrong one, Master Lau.

Go ahead please.

“Poisonous snake on the way”

“Kitty washing face”

“Dragon Sword”

Do you want to continue?

Yes, but I need some rest.

Angel.

Bravo! Can you make it?

I told him not to play mahjong overnight.

Go on teaching.

Angel, let’s go.

Uncle Nine…

Don’t drag me like this, Master.

Master, wake up for practicing…

Master, it’s a hard time for me. Master.

What color should I pick? Black or white?

Mimi, I just saw dad…

He is tired, he slept instead of practicing.

Black looks cool but white color cheers me up.

I think dad is…

Dad may be sick.

But I am the host, better wear a white dress.

Are you listening to me?

Are you a man?

Why do you lose your temper?

You want to use your dad to achieve a business deal.

That’s why I offer my help.

Now you are feeling guilty.

So, just cancel the ball.

Let me tell you something happy.

If this deal is done,

we can make 1.2 billion.

Minus the expenditures and salaries…

We will have 800 million net.

Each of us will get 400 million.

Stop telling me the breakdown.

I will stop it anytime.

What? What’s wrong with you?

You’re making me laugh, aren’t you?

So much money is put in front of you.

I think you even don’t mind getting rid of your dad.

I warn you, don’t point at me with your finger.

If your dad didn’t give me a little help,

I wouldn’t have married you.

And I wouldn’t have letting you spend my money.

What?

I would think of getting divorce with you, believe it or not?

Divorce?

You said I am money minded.

If I divorce with you, I don’t have to share you money.

Bravo!

You promised that you'd never scold me, that's why I married you.

It’s hot! Even the wine gives me hard time!

Mimi, this is for you.

Argued with Mario again?

You are blue blooded.

Marrying you is the biggest luck of Mario.

He’s got cancer now.

He is dying, that’s too bad for you.

Well, get some rest.

You won’t be pretty if you get eye bags. Right?

That bastard is cold-blooded.

Why is he so nice to me?

He looks pale!

If you stool over 10 times a day,

together with such a big injection…

You definitely will look this pale.

He wastes my injection.

It doesn’t matter.

The matter is, he doesn’t look like the oil paint!

He is not fat enough, and not much white hair.

Wai. Yes.

I told you to find me the best make-up artist.

Have you found one?

Yes, he is on the way.

A foreigner? I have faith then.

On the way means he is coming, that’s not his name.

I think that's his name.

Master, here is the make-up artist.

Boss, this is Mr. Mak.

Hi, how are you doing? He is the make-up artist.

Which film production company are you from?

Or, which TV station are you from?

He isn’t working for film or TV station.

So, where are you working?

I work in Hong Kong Funeral Parlor.

I told you to find the best make-up artist in Hong Kong.

How dare you find one from the funeral parlor?

There are three make-up artists in the funeral parlor.

He is the best of them.

And he is my relative.

You know what? We must keep it secret.

Shut up!

I see, because he is your relative.

And you worry that the secret would be disclosed.

You are so smart! I just can’t hide anything from you.

No matter what, Mr. Mak,

Please help to make-up.

Make him look like fat and white.

And more white hair please.

Let's not bother them. Mario, let's go down.

I count on you.

Hurry up. Keep secret.

Hurry up.

It’s okay.

Brother, go there and lie down.

Let me do the make-up for you.

Why lie down?

Is everything outside ready?

Almost done!

Get up… The boss is here.

What’s up?

Why isn’t any guest coming?

Master, take some wine.

There are ten more minutes to go.

Master…

Miss Anita Mui has come.

Anita Mui? I don’t know her.

Miss Mui, nice to meet you!

Welcome. How are you?

Please come in and have a drink.

Thank you so much.

Why not come in and eat something.

It’s okay.

Are you here to sing for us?

No, I just want to…

You know we have many guests here, right?

So you want to join us, right?

No, I just want to…

Don’t you want to steal or rob?

No, I just want to…

What do you want?

I want to use the toilet.

23 and 24. Yes?

Show Miss Mui to the toilet.

This way please. Excuse me.

Coming here for toilet? Kidding me!

Hi.

Hi, Miss Sally Yeh. Nice to meet you.

Aren’t you here for toilet?

No.

So, you come here for…

I come here to drink…

For a drink? That’s great!

But I don’t think you’re on my guest list.

You must be my father’s friend.

No.

My mom’s friend?

No.

My auntie’s friend?

No.

You aren't their friend, so…

My car is out of order.

I come here to get a glass of water.

Come for a glass of water…

55, 56

Take Miss Yeh to the kitchen and get her some water.

Thank you.

Excuse me, please help yourself.

Master.

Are you new?

My name is Michelle Li.

I know your name, are you new?

Yes.

What’s up?

Miss Sylvia Chang has arrived.

Miss Sylvia Chang? Give way…

Welcome…

Congratulations…

Oh, Chan Yau and Sylvia…

See Uncle Tsang’s son? A young man now!

But he is a bit short.

Do you know my dad?

Of course!

We grew up together.

Screw up? Yes.

Don't you believe it? Look at the picture.

I can’t see my father.

He is the photographer.

He took the picture. That's right.

Don’t you trust me? You can ask him.

Michael Hui isn’t my dad.

Uncle Tsang. Uncle Tsang.

Congratulations…

Mario, come here.

Michael Hui isn’t my dad.

Michael Hui? How come you’re my dad?

Bastard, why don’t you recognize me?

Give me your hand.

Put it on top of my hand.

Can you feel your father’s blood?

Of course not.

Of course not?

You know what, bastard!

You succeed all my genes.

What are they?

From you started up your business,

Have you raised your staff’s salary ever?

Of course not!

So, you've got 1/3 of your dad's genes.

So, got 1/3 of my genes.

And for the flood happened last year.

From the money donated by your staff,

I know you didn’t donate a penny,

But did you take all of them to your pocket?

Not at all, just 60% of it.

So, you've got another 1/3 of your dad's genes.

Then you've got 2/3 of my genes.

And, you want to hold this party for showing off.

That’s why you hold this party for me.

Have you ever paid any meals for your dad?

Of course not.

No? You just act like me.

We are father and son, definitely.

Dad…

Here is the prince.

Here comes the prince. His highness is here.

What highness?

Alan Tam?

Sorry my friend, I am not Alan Tam.

I am Alibaba.

Aren’t you Alan Tam?

I come with Forty Thieves to celebrate with you.

Forty Thieves?

No, there aren’t forty thieves coming with you.

No thieves at all.

I am Forty.

I am Thieves.

Directed by our true God,

I know you’re the famous filial son in SE Asia.

So I brought you the contract for rebuilding Kuwait.

This is for you.

Listen to me… Listen to me…

I am sorry!

This is at no cost.

No cost? Rebuild Kuwait? To me?

So I will be rich! Come on!

Ask Mrs. Tsang to come here.

Tell her that I am going to be rich!

Master, so bad! Mrs. Tsang died.

It’s okay.

Over there! Hallelujah.

She is dead, she is dead!

Honey!

Why do you leave me while I am getting rich?

Congratulations…

Why do you congratulate me?

Getting rich with a dead wife, it’s something awesome!

This is your thought.

Honey, your idols Alan Tam and Michael Hui…

They have come here.

But you left! Why?

Why?

Why spit on my wife?

The saliva of our prince is holy.

Why did you spit on my wife?

Sorry, I have forgotten.

He has forgotten, and me too.

I bless her with my saliva.

You can’t do that.

You are not from the royal family, you can’t do that.

When I saw you spitting,

I can tell how much you love your wife, I am touched.

I want to save him.

So, ask him to come here.

Who is he? Can he save me?

We are movie stars.

Of course we’ll ask another movie star to save you.

Stephen Chow please.

Who is yelling?

Stephen Chow!

Hi, Stephen!

He is Stephen Chow!

Please help this dwarf to cure his wife.

Okay, I know what to do then.

All men go to the left and women go to the right.

Your Highness, Stephen is now helping.

I think we should go aside.

Why not have a sauna bath?

Good idea! Let’s go! Okay.

Same stance?

Can change or not?

Don’t you like it?

No.

Tired of it?

It’s not my idea, everyone thinks it’s something old.

By the way, I am a bit tired of it.

That’s great.

I’ll show you a simple one.

Good, please.

I did. One more.

You mean this? That’s right.

Like it or not?

Yes, but it’s really a simple one.

So I worry that it would cause some mistakes.

Possibly, it can’t help.

Just a little mistake. Not easily to be notified.

Are you Miss Gong Li?

Yes, I am Gong Li, I am your wife.

What?

Your mistake is… you made her my…

Just a little mistake, please accept my apology.

Bravo!

I really love you.

You love me?

Are you kidding me? I am not smart looking.

I look like him instead, why do you love me?

Everyone knows you are a handsome gentleman, Mr. Cheung.

Hey, my surname is Tsang, not Cheung.

Do you mistake me as Zhang Yi-mou?

Your name is Cheung.

What?

You can look into the mirror.

Mirror? Go ahead.

What does it matter with the surname?

Miss Gong, you can call me Master Sing.

What’s up? Why have I become Leslie Cheung?

Ghost!

What’s up with you? Half hour’s gone!

Why hasn’t any guest come yet?

No guest? It’s ridiculous!

Where are Anita Mui and Michael Hui?

We don’t know them, are you dreaming?

Dream? No, I have no reason to become Leslie Cheung.

Really? So, what about me?

You are Dodo Cheng.

I like her!

She’s bitchy, why do you like her?

What? She is a very good actress!

It’s useless to act well. Cut the crap.

What’s next? We have no guests coming.

No guests? That’s right.

Boss…

What’s up? Boss.

What a trouble!

What’s it? Is your ex-girlfriend meeting your wife?

No, all our guests go to Hung’s house.

They’ll get a gold coin for visiting.

Gold coin?

So why are you standing here?

Can I say something?

Prince Alibaba from Kuwait…

Here he is.

The Prince? Ask someone to receive him.

How about the guests?

You have to negotiate with Hung.

Me? Yes, go…

Go from the rear door, I’ll handle the prince.

Wai, check if the old man gets ready or not.

Go… Okay.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8…

Yes, madam.

We had training this morning.

Now, go with me to receive the Prince.

Come on…

Ready, on your mark.

Two of you go to open the door.

Welcome.

Your Highness.

Please come in.

I am Mrs. Tsang, welcome.

This is our honour to see you here.

Isn’t there a party?

Yes, we will have a party soon. Where are the guests?

Please take a seat.

Your Highness, this is your first time to Hong Kong,

so you don’t know the traffic problem here.

The guests are on the way, they meet traffic jam as usual.

My hubby Mario is going to clear the way for them.

Have some drinks first.

Make yourself at home.

Welcome…

Come on, a little souvenir.

Mr. Hung gives you a gold coin as souvenir.

Welcome…

Mr. Hung is so generous!

Just a little souvenir, this way please.

Congratulations… Welcome.

Welcome…

Every guests….

will receive a gold coin from Mr. Hung.

Just a little gold coin, it is only of 1.33 oz.

Thank you, Mr. Hung.

Thank you for coming.

Thank you… Enjoy…

Welcome… Enjoy…

I heard that you’re holding a big party at home.

I bet there must be many guests.

Yes, Mr. Hung, I heard that Mr. Tsang inviting many guests too.

He must have invited many guests.

Of course, but not as many as yours.

But I have Prince Alibaba as my guest.

You lose face for not having His Highness as your guest.

Right. That’s right.

No prince but guests, no profit.

Mr. Hung, he’s right.

None of your business, you bootlicker.

Come on, let’s have a talk.

What?

Come here.

What do you want?

You’re so straightforward, I love it! Make it 50-50.

What do you mean?

I will share half of your profit.

What?

This is a small gift from Mr. Hung.

How about 25%?

This is from Mr. Hung. Thank you.

Thank you for coming. Thank you.

Help yourself please.

What have you just said?

One third.

Director Young.

Thank you for coming…

Thank you. A souvenir.

It’s gold. Real gold?

Thank you for coming. You’re so generous!

If I give you half of the profit,

will you take all guests to my side, now?

Deal.

Please go in.

You’re welcome. Thank you.

Mr. Tsang is having a birthday party for his dad,

let’s go over there for celebration.

My party is not special at all.

Take them to Tsang’s house. Birthday party!

Go over there, come on.

What’s up?

Almost done.

Don’t move, pal.

If you move, I don't know how to do next.

Uncle, time’s up.

Is it okay to brush on his eyebrow?

Don’t worry.

I have worked on dead bodies for decades.

Every rich man looks the same in coffin.

It’s okay.

Master, we have to go now.

Uncle, don’t go.

You have to remove his make-up later.

But I have never removed make-up for dead people.

I only know how to make up for them.

It’s okay, you can go now.

Master, let’s go.

I will never forget my dad.

Your Highness, you’re filial!

My husband is as filial as you.

I think you two can make good friends.

Mrs. Tsang.

I think my father-in-law is coming down.

Let me go and show him the way here. Please take a seat.

Mrs. Tsang.

Dad!

What’s up?

Oh, that’s a maid only.

What’s up with his make-up? It’s smelting!

It’s smelting!

Oh, dead people won’t sweat!

Where is your uncle?

He’s gone.

Ask him to come back.

Yes. I warned him not to use white paint!

Dad, you can’t meet people with this look.

Let me take you up.

What’s up? Come on…

Mimi…

Are you Fred?

Have we invited you?

Today is dad’s birthday party.

Why haven’t the guests come yet?

They are coming, go to any corner for a seat.

No, we’ll go upstairs to see dad.

Yes, let’s go.

Why upstairs? Here I am!

Dad?

Right, you’ve come the right time.

Take him upstairs, he can’t see people now.

Don’t let anyone see him.

Go, go upstairs.

Dad, what’s up with you?

Whatever they say.

Those foolish maids!

They can’t even handle tiny matters!

Let me take that seat.

May I take a good look of your dad’s picture?

I have one more for you.

Dad. Dad!

Are you okay? I am fine.

Dad, let’s go back home.

Right, let’s go.

No, I promised to help Mario.

But he made you look like a crown. Why helping him?

That’s right, why helping him?

Let’s go home. But…

Go… I promised him…

Honey…

Oh no, I can’t see anyone now.

Hide up first. Come on…

Dad!

Honey…

Honey, here are the guests. Honey…

Here are the guest, go receive them.

The prince is in there, go talk to him.

So you receive the other guests. All right.

Come and help.

Welcome… How are you doing?

Make yourself at home, enjoy please.

That’s toilet.

No peeping.

Welcome… How are you? Thank you.

Please go in…

Enjoy… Make yourself at home.

Jacky

Yes, Mrs. Tsang.

Where is Hung?

Does he hate seeing so many guests here?

No, he is waiting for someone.

Who is that?

I don’t know.

Mr. Li, how are you?

Mario, come on.

Enjoy…

What’s up?

How did you make Hung collaborate with you?

I gave half of the profit to him, that’s your share.

Please go in.

Are you fooling me?

You gave 400 million to him?

Do you think I am as stupid as the old men who sold you the blocks?

I agreed to take that old man home from Choi-hung Estate,

all because of sharing the profit of the business.

I don’t care, even you share half of the profit to Hung,

I want half of yours.

Stop dreaming!

You big ass!

Okay, I’ll tell your old man right now.

You don’t have cancer, you dwarf!

I heard everything.

What are you doing here?

Look at your make-up!

You made him look horrible, he dares not go out.

Glad that you listen everything.

He is not filial and he has no cancer.

He did everything for his business.

All right, my deal is gone.

Our relationship will end too.

Get lost now!

You want a divorce with me?

Yes. Let me tell you…

I want to divorce with you.

I own half of the property right of this house.

I’ll let you finish the party first.

Tomorrow, you have to go, I am leaving now.

Ask me to get out of the house? You get lost!

Never come back!

Dad, let’s go home.

Right, let’s go home.

Where are you going?

We are going home.

Go… everyone leaves now.

Mr. Tsang.

Your Highness.

Where is your dad? Isn’t he upstairs?

I am going to take him down.

Help serve the Prince.

Wait, I’ll be right back.

Right back.

Your Highness.

Your Highness, nice to meet you.

Mr. Hung, here you are.

This is Prince Alibaba, and this is Mr. Hung.

He brings you a special guest.

Happy birthday to you….

Ladies and gentlemen.

Ladies and gentlemen…

Tonight…

This party is to celebrate the birthday of…

Mr. Hung’s dad.

Thank you for coming…

Thank you…

Thank you…

Wait…

Why don’t you wait for me for cutting birthday cake?

Who are you?

He is Mario…

Mario’s father.

Why don’t you ask your son to come down?

Please wait, I will ask my son to come down.

But I worry that… if your son comes, you can’t come again.

Stop fooling us.

I know your father is not here.

You’ll lose this time.

For the business, I will take it for sure.

Help me to finish the show,

I’ll give you 0.5%.

Wrong memory! Today is not his birthday.

Come on, let’s sing birthday song for my dad.

Dad, please cut the cake.

Happy birthday to you…

Wait!

Since this is such a big party,

I will give you more fun.

I’m not Mario’s dad.

And this old man…

He isn’t Hung’s dad.

Hung’s dad died decades ago.

My father isn’t here…

It’s because…

He wants to give you a surprise.

He knows Hung will play tricks to ruin his party,

So he disguises as me and to uncover his trick.

Your Highness, I am Mario’s father.

No matter what happens here,

I would like to let you know one thing,

Mario, my son is a filial boy.

Oh, you’re Uncle Tsang.

I feel ease now.

I wish you happy birthday.

Thank you!

Alibaba, see you!

See you… Bye!

Ladies and gentlemen, the party is not over yet.

Instead, it begins now.

Come on, let’s sing birthday song.

They are my guests, let’s go.

Happy birthday to you…

Happy birthday to my dad…

Happy birthday to you…

Mario, stop singing, they’ve all gone.

I have finished my acting which you wish me to do so.

Don’t come to me again.

Why are you here?

I want to see dad.

Haven’t you tortured him enough?

I won’t let you make use of him to make money.

I came here for apology.

Be frank, okay?

You do everything for money!

I mean it.

I brought back the contracts for those old men.

Is he up there?

Yes, I can take you to see him,

but I don’t think he likes to see you.

If he kicks you away, don’t come back to us again.

Gigi…

We haven’t eaten anything yet.

What a night! That’s right!

Gigi, I forgot to ask you…

Dad.

Your congee.

Where is the congee which I asked for?

Here it is.

Sit down for some food.

Dad, I’ve had enough food.

Dad.

Dad.

Alibaba?

Brother, calm down!

His Highness made friends with dad many years ago.

Don’t you know that?

When your dad was a sailor twenty years ago,

I was saved by him on the beach.

See? This is me.

I really don’t know.

You haven’t listened to dad’s words seriously.

If I knew you're his son before,

I would have passed the project to you.

If you knew dad better,

You wouldn’t have made such nonsense.

That’s right, we can’t help.

It’s okay.

Your Highness, actually…

I am not a filial son.

Tonight…

I just wanted to cheat you, to make you give me the contract.

I am so sorry!

Dad.

These are the contracts signed by Uncle Wong and Uncle Cheung.

Please pass the contracts to them.

Goodbye.

My friend…

Don’t go.

Uncle Tsang, you haven’t answered my question yet.

Can I trust your son?

I will let him answer you directly.

Not reliable for sure.

I am hopeless.

Pal… stop going.

You are not hopeless!

Uncle Tsang, now your son starts to understand…

What honesty is.

I will hand you a 2-year contract for rebuilding Kuwait.

2 years?

Dad, I've got it, haven't I?

Dad, so… Thank you.

Thank you…

Gigi, I have made it!

He'll be rich!

Oh, ill-fated Kuwait!

I’m going back to hotel now.

I will take an early plane to Kuwait tomorrow.

Bye… See you…

See you…

He looks like a rich Arab Chief! Why does he…

Of course, my son has got a deal from him.

He is going to rebuild Kuwait!

Bravo! It’s just a piece of cake!

You’d treat us to midnight snack.

Midnight snack? Good idea!

Not just few of us.

Ask all the neighbors to come.

Invite everyone? All neighbors!

Neighbors, Uncle Tsang’s son is going to treat us to midnight snack.

I told you to come earlier.

Uncle Tsang, these shrimps are nice, eat while they are hot.

Big shrimps! Enjoy!

Am I dreaming?

Sis, do you have a small mirror with you?

Please give it to me. Mirror?

Yes.

Are you crazy? Why bringing a big mirror with you?

Mario, why are you here?

Little Bee? Yes!

People always said you look like Leslie Chung, I don’t believe it.

You know what? You really look like him.

Aren’t you staying in USA? Why are you back?

My dad wants to take off his wisdom tooth…

And my mom wants an operation for double eyelids.

That’s why I am back home to visit them.

For one thing, you have never changed.

You are as filial as before.

You were filial too.

Uncle Tsang, here you are!

Yes, come and take some food with us.

No, thanks. I came here to find my brother.

Brother Bee.

I heard that you have achieved well in Hong Kong.

Sister told me that you won’t go back soon this time.

Do you want me to stay longer?

I just want to take you back home to greet mom and dad now.

Enjoy…

Uncle Bill and his family are here.

Uncle Tsang, congratulations…

Hubby, congratulations to Uncle Tsang!

Uncle Tsang, congratulations for a big business.

And thank you for the treats tonight.

There are empty seats. Let’s go.

I’ll get the seats for you first.

I wish to keep you stay by my words.

What’s in my heart, in my life…

I just love you…

Kid, what are you doing here?

I am frying vegetables. What’s up?

You call this cooking?

Why not?

You're clumsy! Let your dad show you.

Learn from me. You should cook like this.

This is cooking.

There is something tasty on the table…

Chicken…

Baked chicken…

Tasty baked chicken…

Eat while it’s still hot.

Come on, try some…

Okay, we'll eat later. What’s up?

Forget it, let’s eat first.

But I have to check the mark six result first.

How many numbers have you got?

One only.

How about you?

Two.

Go on, check all these before eating.

Let’s eat, forget about her.

Come on… Let her check the numbers.

Take some shrimps. Uncle Tsang’s daughter-in-law has come.

Uncle Tsang’s daughter-in-law has come.

Right. Mrs. Tsang's come.

Boss, isn’t that Mrs. Tsang?

Nuts!

Keep the change, thank you.

It’s her! Should I take her here?

Take a seat.

Mario, go.

Brother. Go.

Dad.

Mimi.

Dad.

I just want to return this pack of tissue to you.

Well, I am leaving.

Why not eat something with us?

No, I am not hungry.

All the neighbors are waiting for you.

Neighbors, my daughter-in-law has come.

Why is she here?

I hope she won’t mess this party up.

Mimi, come and sit right here.

I just want to stay a while with you, I am not hungry.

Dad, eat something.

Have some chicken.

Thank you, Mimi.

You seldom come, why not try some local dishes?

The shrimps are tasty!

Try this, this is great.

Mrs. Tsang, try this piece of squid.

I ordered this, I’ll give you half of it.

You know I dislike this.

But how can I give you your favorite in front of them?

Mimi, what do you like to eat?

Chicken ass.

Oh, you love eating chicken ass!

What are you doing?

She will eat if only it is delivered by me.

Take it. Take it.

Eat some chicken.

Dad, come to live with us if you like.

This fatty is going to miss you.

How about you, are you missing me?

Tell dad…

I miss him, so what?

Why did you just mention me only? We're missing him.

You miss him more.

Cut the crap!

Come on, let’s eat.

Wait.

Have you ever seen Mimi eating chicken ass?

Come on, let her show you.

Come on,

Mimi, what a happy party here,

why not entertain us?

Come on, eat it.

No… Come on.

Stop messing up. Let me take it to you.

It eats everything, what’s left for me?

Share it.

Uncle Tsang, congratulations!

Thank you. Greet Uncle.

Uncle Tsang.

Hi, Mario, long time no see.

Have you come back from USA? Yes.

Look, she’s a pretty lady now!

When I last saw her, she was this small.

Congratulations, we haven’t seen you for a long time.

How are you?

Pal, congratulations, let’s have some drinks.

Thank you. Want some beer?

Don’t worry, I can make it. You’re great!

There are seats for us. Enjoy.

Sure, let’s go over there.

Bye! Enjoy.

Bye. Make yourself at home.

Who is she?

I don’t know, I haven’t seen her before.

Don’t you know her?

I thought she’s your friend.

You’ll get drunk.

You know what?

My business failed, my wife’s left me.

You women know nothing.

Do you think I love to be a bootlicker?

I just want to buy a house,

and to live happily with my wife.

I can’t help, you know?

If I don't flatter the boss, I can’t make a living.

So…

Stop drinking, eat something.

Honey…

You know I am waiting for you?

I love you more and more…

It’s embarrassing!

Bingo! I won mark six lottery!

We’ve got a complaint, why are you crying loudly?

Sir, I won mark six lottery!

Bingo! I won it.

So what? How much have you won?

Four numbers! One hundred dollars!

I tell you, stop crying loud.

Otherwise, the party should be stopped.

Be co-operative, got it?

You just won 100 dollars, lower your voice.

Better than nothing, right?

Hubby, this is the beginning of good luck.

I will win the grand prize one day!

Here comes the chicken.

Pal, you love eating chicken ass?

No, I am not.

But you are holding my chicken ass.

Pal…

You are holding the chicken head, pal.

You mean this chicken head?

Isn’t it chicken head?

So, where is the hair?

Can’t you see white hair on it?

This is such a long white hair, haven’t you seen it?

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, are you crazy?

Isn’t it hair on the head?

You said this is ass, so, what is this?

This is ass.

That must be piles!

Sorry, you take it.

Pal, he is right.

Let’s have a drink with the neighbors

All right. Let’s have a drink.

Dear neighbors, cheers…

Cheers! Cheers!

Cheers... Cheers...

Cheers... Cheers...

Cheers... Cheers...

Cheers... Cheers...