Original subtitles

MAN ON NEWSREEL: September 14, 1940.

Congress passes the first peacetime

Selective Service Training Act

in the history of the nation.

President Roosevelt signs the draft bill,

an epochal step in national defense.

Impressive ceremonies.

Secretary of War Stimson is blindfolded,

draws the first number from 9,000 sealed capsules.

The first number drawn by the Secretary of War

is serial number 158.

MAN ON NEWSREEL: And the youth of America prepare

to become peacetime buck privates.

(HORNS HONKING)

(TIRES SCREECH)

That's no way to drive, Martin.

Sorry, sir.

The line forms on the left.

You play soldier.

Everything seems to be running smoothly, Captain Johnson.

Yes, sir. We're getting a fine group of men.

More teeth and less flat feet.

That's splendid. I'll see you later.

Captain Johnson? Yes?

I'm Randolph Parker.

Dad's in Washington now, heading some kind of defense board.

I suppose you've heard from him?

No.

Well, I'm sure you will.

Dad's bound to want me working with him.

So about this order to report for training?

Why, of course, Mr. Parker, I understand.

If you'll just step in here, we'll be delighted to take care of you.

Thanks.

You're sure this won't take long?

Oh, no. You'll hang your hat there, please.

Yes.

And your coat, too.

My coat? MAN: Wide, please.

And the rest of your clothes, please.

MAN: Tonsils okay. The rest of my...

Open, please.

Wide. 155. Next.

Tonsils okay. Next.

Wide, please.

175. Next.

Name?

I'm Robert Martin,

number 158.

158? Say, that's a nice number.

Imagine me being first prize in a raffle?

(BOTH LAUGH)

Give the boy a break, Officer.

He's reporting for service.

MAN: That's the stuff. That's fine and dandy.

Now, friends, I don't want to give you any sales talk,

but in my time I've advertised tooth powder,

face powder, foot powder and flea powder.

I've lived on the bounty of the county

and done my boarding with the warden.

Never have I ever had the opportunity

of presenting such merchandise to the public.

Feel that material. That's enough.

Now, friends, ordinarily this tie would sell

in any haberdashery for $1.50.

But am I asking you for $1.50? No.

Am I asking you for $1? No.

Am I asking you for 50 cents? No.

All I am asking for is 10 cents.

Wait a minute. Let me get a word in or two.

Go ahead. Go on.

I'll listen to you for a while.

Thanks very kindly. Now, neighbor, how much money have you got?

I've got in the vicinity of $28.

You've got $28?

In the vicinity. In the neighborhood, I got 3 bucks.

Then, you've got $3?

Roughly speaking-

Roughly speaking?

When you smooth it out, I got a buck.

Then you have $1? You have $1.

That's all I wanted to know.

The gentleman buys 10 ties.

How can he sell ties that cheap?

We ain't got no overhead.

We haven't even got a license to sell these ties.

Feel that material.

It won't wrinkle or fade.

(SINGING) Fade, Smitty, fade

What's wrong? What's wrong?

The opper-cay is here, the opper-cay

Come here, you!

Get in the cab.

Hey, cabbie, step on it.

We're trying to get away from a cop.

BOTH: on, yeah?

(BOTH EXCLAIM)

(WHISTLES) Herbie. Quick. What?

Get in line. We'll hide in the movies.

Yeah, and when we get in, we'll stay a long time.

All right. Get a couple of tickets. Okay.

What are you, a wise guy?

You want to fight? Take your coat off.

It's much cooler this way, ain't it?

Go ahead. Get a couple of tickets.

What's your hurry? What's your hurry?

We got rid of that dumb cop.

(HERBIE HUMMING)

How much to get in?

Nothing. We're going to give you $21.

Oh, bank night. Giving any dishes away?

No, a tin plate.

Tin plates, what a novelty.

Now we can start our new set.

You want to step inside.

Come on, or we won't get a seat.

Hey, usher. Hey, you.

What picture's playing in here?

You're in the army now.

Good. I never saw that picture.

Calling Dr. Goldwater. Calling Dr. Goldwater.

What's this calling Dr. Goldwater?

It must be a double feature. I guess so.

Draftee? Not a bit. You feel it?

No.

I feel very comfortable in here.

Right over there.

Hey, come on.

Let's register before the drawing starts.

Think you're gonna win, huh?

Step fight up, 'BOYS-

Sign right here, please.

"Please." Boy, what polite ushers.

Quiet!

And let me have your signature right there, please.

I'd be delighted. And I hope I win.

Well, congratulations, men.

We're glad to have you in the army.

BOTH: Thanks! What?

The army?

You won! Gangway! Mutiny!

Going someplace, boys?

Yeah, yes, we're going someplace.

We're going in the army, and you can't touch us.

So you're going in the army, eh?

Well, I'll be seeing you.

What am I laughing at?

What are you putting your tie on for?

Somebody might come in.

239. You just made it.

If you'd been over 240, we'd had to turn you down. Next.

Hey, Smitty, did you hear that? Yes.

If you're over 240 pounds, they don't take you.

That's right. Boy, am I lucky.

Hey, look, get a load of this. 241.

Sit down before you get in trouble.

Get away.

MAN: 164, 164. Next.

239. Next.

158 and a half. Next.

173 and a quarter. Next.

164. Next.

Sit still. You act as though you've got a hot foot.

Hot foot? Brother, you got a very poor sense of direction.

MAN: 158 and a half. Next.

Boy, this is arson.

MAN: 164. Next.

That's you, Herbie.

Okay, Smitty, have a good time in the army.

241.

It's gonna be okay.

Congratulations, my boy.

You're in the army by two ounces.

Two ounces? Double-crosser.

Just for that, you go to bed without your supper.

And that I will obey the President of the United States.

ALL: And that I will obey the President of the United States.

And the orders of the officers appointed over me

according to the rules and articles of war.

ALL: And the orders of the officers appointed over me

according to the rules and articles of war.

You men will report at the High Street Armory at 7:00.

We will leave from the railway station at 9:00.

Until then, dismissed.

I'm gonna go home to my mama.

Will you get my hat, Martin? I left it in the other room.

Mr. Parker. Yes?

I've worked for you for two years, haven't I?

Yeah, that's right.

It's been quite an experience.

I've carried you upstairs and put you to bed any number of times.

Why bring that up?

I got you out of fights with nightclub waiters

and gambling house bouncers.

Yeah, so?

Remember that night I froze both my ears waiting for you?

And that little accident you had

where I took the rap and went to jail?

Look, Martin. Let's not reminisce.

Yeah, but we're in the army now.

And I think it's about time I tendered my resignation.

Very well. Tender it.

Yes, sir.

What do you think of that? That gives me an idea.

Turn on the heat and get me in the army, will you?

- So what? Don't. - Why...

Well, what are you waiting for?

(WHISTLE BLOWS)

(WHISTLE BLOWS)

OFFICER: Detail! Detail!

Halt! Halt!

Let the men fall out until train time.

Yes, sir.

You men can fall out, but don't go out of this area.

Say your goodbyes, and when I say, "Fall in," be here.

Dismissed.

All right, girls. You can go into action.

Cigarette, soldier? Compliments of the army.

Everything all right here?

You look lonesome.

Won't you have an apple?

Cigarette, soldier?

Judy Gray, what are you doing here?

I joined the army. Go on.

I'm a camp hostess now.

It's something new.

We're going to try to give the boys

the feeling that the camp is their home.

You know, add the feminine touch.

Say now, that'll make being drafted a lot more popular.

I think it's pretty popular right now.

Your cigarette, sir? Thanks.

See you later, Bob.

Apple? Compliments of the army.

I'm sorry, sir, but your mother's inside, sir.

Go away, Edmunds.

My mother? Yes, sir.

Oh, that's all I need.

Scram, you beautiful thing.

Come on, come on, come on. What is this?

She's coming this way, sir.

Very good work, Edmunds.

Better fix your face, sir. Fix your face.

Have an apple, boys? Cigarette?

Cigarette?

Randolph, my boy.

Hello, Mother. Captain.

I phoned your father.

Yeah?

He'll have you out of this in no time.

Did he say exactly when?

A week at the most.

I suppose you'll just have to make the best of the ordeal.

You'll pardon my saying so, Mrs. Parker, but it won't be an ordeal.

As a matter of fact, a year in the army

can do a great deal for any man.

Just heaps.

I can understand how it may benefit some men,

those who have no advantages in their homes.

I know, but...

But his education and background should certainly entitle him

to more than these other young men.

How can they make a Yale man a private?

Would you care for some chewing gum?

Yes, thanks.

Have you got a lollipop? Mmm-hmm.

You like lollipops?

I'm a sucker for these things.

Cigarette, sir?

Gee, she's a nice-looking messenger-boy girl.

Stop looking at her.

I was only looking at her

to see if she was looking at me

to see if I was looking at her.

Remember our vaudeville days?

You remember those three little girls

who worked with us on the same bill?

Look over there.

Oh, the Andrews Sisters. Oh, boy.

(SINGING) You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

To be able to live as you do

And to have that swell Miss Liberty gal

Carrying the torch for you

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

Do you know just how highly you rate?

You should thank your lucky stars and I mean

You should thank all 48

Man, you've really got a family tree

With Washington, Jefferson Lincoln and Lee

You're lucky to have ancestors like that

Don't you know you were born with a feather in your hat?

You're a very, very wealthy gent

I don't care if you haven't a cent

You've got your American way

And, brother, that ain't hay

If some poor suckers could choose

they'd love to be in your shoes

That proves that your good fortune's no myth

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

"K" Company, fall in!

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

To be able to live as you do

And to have that swell Miss Liberty gal

Carrying the torch for you

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

Do you know just how highly you rate?

You should thank your lucky stars and I mean

You should thank all 48

Man, you've really got a family tree

Those bags are too much for you.

Why don't you get a redcap?

Why should I get a red cap?

What's the matter with the hat I got on?

You're lucky to have ancestors like that

Don't you know you were born with a feather in your hat?

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

You can say that again. Yes, ma'am.

Can you use some smokes?

Say,don% mind if I do.

Charge it to your Uncle Sam

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

You should really be shouting with joy

Yes, ma'am, that's just what I'm doing,

'cause I'm Uncle Sammy's fair-haired boy.

Boys, you're rolling in a lot of wealth

Your speech is free. Yes, siree!

And you've got your health.

Sure, we've got our health.

And tell me why not.

(SINGING) Take a look at the great constitution we've got

Say, this fellow we've been talking to

might be our president before he's through.

And I mean that all, all on the square

Well, say now, I declare.

You're blushing red, white and blue

but, buddy, that's all right, too

Because those colors look good on you

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

You're a lucky fellow and if suckers could choose

They would love to be in your little shoesies

That proves that your good fortune's no myth

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

(ALL CHEER)

Oh, hello.

Hello.

Need a light, soldier?

Yeah, thanks.

I didn't catch your name.

I didn't throw it.

Don't go away.

But I have to. I'm on duty.

A hostess' first duty is to keep the soldiers happy.

And I will not be happy unless we get better acquainted.

We have a full year to become acquainted.

But I'll be out of the army in a week.

What's the matter, Judy?

Just a fresh recruit trying out the manual of arms.

Oh, Bob, please. It wasn't anything. Really.

Judy, we're running out of chewing gum.

Do you have any to spare?

Yes, Patty.

I'm just telling you to stay away from her.

I'll pick my own company, Martin.

Maybe on Park Avenue, but not in the army.

Keep away from Judy.

Judy, eh? Private stock?

(HERBIE MURMURS) Why,you“.

It's no good, huh? Excuse me.

You guys seen my pal?

No, I haven't.

You haven't seen him, huh?

(WHISTLES)

I always did prefer cinders to cigar smoke.

Do you boys mind if we share this platform with you?

No, not at all.

Come right in.

Finish our dance later?

You've got a date.

Come on and do your duty.

There it is, boys. Seven is a natural.

MAN 1: Cleaned me. MAN 2: Talk about hot dice.

MAN 3: There goes my lesson for today.

What are you doing, boys?

He just gave us a lesson in dice.

Dice? What's dice?

It's a game. Don't you play games? A game?

Yeah, I play jacks.

He Ways jacks.

I'm up to my foursies.

Oh, behave. That's the game.

Will you teach me how to play that?

Will I teach you how to play it?

I should say I will. Will I teach him?

You see, there's numbers on there from one to six.

Now, you roll them out, and if you should roll a one and a six,

that's a seven. That's a natural. You win.

If you roll a five and a two, that's seven.

That's a natural. You win.

If you roll a four and a three, that's seven.

That's a natural. You win.

That's all you do is win?

Well, no.

You can lose, too.

Well, not often.

If you roll a one and a two, that's craps. You lose.

If you roll two sixes, that's craps. You lose.

You can win or you can lose. Thafsit

That's fair.

See, seven you win and craps you lose.

Let's play. You want to play?

All right, here you are. You roll the dice.

Okay, we'll play for money?

Yes, we play. Now, how much you want to bet?

I'll bet $10.

$10. That's a good bet.

There you are. Now, good luck to you.

Here I go. Seven you win, craps you lose. Go ahead.

Here I go.

Seven. I win.

Yes. Wait a minute, I forgot to tell you,

don't pick up the money right away.

I do get to pick it up? Yeah.

Yeah. Sure. It's your money.

Yes, yes, yes. You roll them again. I roll them...

How much you want to bet?

Fade that.

"FadethaF? VVait a minute. VVait a minute.

Just a minute. Just a minute.

Don't get so rough.

Wait a minute.

Where did you get that "fade that"?

Why? Did I say something wrong?

No, you said it too darn right!

I'm sorry. Sorry.

You sure you've never played this game before?

All right.

Here you are. Go ahead.

Okay. Same thing?

Yeah, same thing.

Here I go again.

Go ahead.

(HERBIE EXCLAIMS)

Seven again. I win.

Yes, you win again.

Iguessifs beginner's luck. Yeah.

What do you want to bet now? Let it ride.

"Let it ride"? Wait a minute.

Now, just a minute.

Now, wait a minute. Now, don't tell me you got that out of thin air.

I heard that at the clubhouse. That's what I thought.

I must confess. Come on.

Well, there was a bunch of boys over in the clubhouse,

and they had lumps of sugar and they was throwing them out.

And I heard one of the boys say that.

But you didn't play in the game?

They wouldn't let me. I was too young.

Well, that's different. I didn't...

Starting Tuesday I'm going out with girls.

I don't blame you. Sure.

Well, that's all right. Go ahead.

Okay-

I thought you'd played the game.

What do you think?

Same thing.

There you go. Four.

A little Joe. "Little Joe"?

Now, wait a minute. Now, just a minute.

Clubhouse! Clubhouse!

Clubhouse, yes.

You learned an awful lot at that clubhouse, didn't you?

Four is your number.

But don't forget, if you throw a seven

before you make that four, you lose.

Okay. Go ahead.

You start. You start.

Uh-uh! Uh-uh!

I'll be legitimate.

You'd better be.

(EXCLAIMS)

Clubhouse.

Three. You lose. How come?

Vvhatdkiyou roll the first time? Foun

What did you just roll? Three.

Four and three is what? Seven.

I said seven. Certainly. You add them up.

He didn't say anything about adding them up.

Go down to the clubhouse and learn that.

That's not fair. VVait a minute, wait a minute.

We're gonna play my way. You're not gonna use my money now?

For a change, yes.

You've used mine long enough.

Put it all down.

Here, you don't care, do you?

All right, watch them. Here they go.

Six. Six is the point. Six. Six.

Well, boys, watch this one.

Six again. You lose!

No, no, no. lwin.

VVhat'd you roll the first time? Six.

What'd you just roll? Six.

Six and six is 12, craps, boxcars, Big Bennys.

(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)

Detail, halt.

Take it easy for a few minutes, boys.

You'll be inoculated just as soon as the jam's over.

Hey, what are we waiting for?

Come on. Let's go.

Go ahead.

Step up, boys. Get yourself a tie.

Get a load of them, fellows. 10 cents each. Real silk.

Won't rip or tear. See?

Must be one of the cheap nickel ones.

Put that grip away! Yes, sir.

And don't sell any more ties out of that case.

Yes, sir. You heard what the sergeant said.

Don't sell no more ties out of that case.

Well, how does he expect us to make a living?

That's easy. Come on, fellows. Come on down here.

I got ties, 10 cents each.

Next.

I don't like this. Next.

Don't be scared. All you do is go up there.

The doctor takes a needle.

Like this, it's all over.

Be brave. Next.

Don't push, brother.

Hi, shorty.

(WHISTLES)

Next.

Don't be scared. I'm right behind you.

(EXCLAIMS IN PAIN)

(CLATTERING)

Hope they're not out of style when I get out.

Yeah, clean them, press them.

Give them a double dose of mothballs and throw them away.

SERGEANT '. Beta“, ha“.

Right face.

At ease, men. You may rest your equipment.

I'm Captain Williams, commanding officer of this company,

and, men, I'm just as new to you as you are to me.

We all have the same job ahead of us.

And I believe we'll find it an interesting one.

A great many people are counting on our success,

people from all walks of life

who are contributing to this great national defense program

just as much as you or l.

I refer to the factory workers, the farmers,

the citizens whose taxes are paying for this training,

the people of America.

Now, no one expects you to be seasoned soldiers overnight,

but we're going to do everything we can

to help you in every possible way.

And I believe if we all work together

that we'll make "K" Company a unit of which any regiment can be proud.

Sergeant Callahan? Yes, sir.

Appoint acting corporals and assign the men to tents.

Yes, sir.

Sergeant, first seven men, last tent on your left.

First seven men, fightface. Acting corporal.

Next seven men,

second to last tent on your left.

I never knew you made your own bed at home.

I must have forgotten to tell you.

MAN: Men, the new sarge.

21 bucks a month to be a chambermaid.

Oh, fix it up.

Hello, boys. I'm Collins, your sergeant.

Smitty, that voice is very familiar.

Too familiar.

Who's acting corporal here?

I am, Sergeant.

Well,

this is gonna be more fun than I expected.

So you gentlemen are in my section.

Not anymore. We're resigning.

Herbie, pick up your things.

Right.

Where are you going?

To collect my social security.

You can't collect your social security until you're 65.

Seeing you, I aged 35 years.

Put that down. Put it...

VVell. It's a put-up job. It's a frame-up.

I never saw this stuff before in all my life.

In that case, you'll never miss this, will you?

That'll cost you $1.50. What?

Who said that? Not me.

Smitty, I don't think he likes me.

Not bad. Not at all bad.

Where did you learn to make up a bunk?

Military school.

Why didn't you tell the first sergeant?

You might have been made acting corporal.

You can have the whole army.

By next Monday I'll be through with it.

So you're the one they've been talking about,

the dude with all the drag.

That's me, Sarge.

(HUMMING)

Only singing.

(CONTINUES HUMMING)

Hey, you with all the drag.

Drag yourself over here

and see if you can show these monkeys how to make up a bunk.

And you two pay attention.

If you can't stand up like a soldier,

let's see if you can learn to sleep like one.

Sergeant, will you tuck me in bed?

(GROANS)

Get rid of that thing!

Throw it out! Understand?

Well, you heard what the sergeant said.

Throw it out.

(GASPS)

(PANTS)

Hello, Bob. Having a little trouble?

Yeah, sort of.

You know, when you want to write a letter to a girl...

How would you start a love letter?

There's only one way to write a love letter.

(SINGING) Sweetheart, my own

You don't know how I miss you

Just thought I'd drop a line and let you know I'm fine

Except I wish you were here

I've been so blue

What I'd give just to kiss you

It rained a bit tonight but now the stars are bright

Gee, but I wish you were here

Each night when lights are out

I make up dreams about you and me

And like the fairy tales I used to read

They all end happily

Sweetheart, my own

How I long

To be with you

I miss you more each day

There's not much else to say

Except

I wish you were here

Wonderful service.

I got an answer to my letter before I even wrote it.

Army service.

On, I get it.

Nothing personal, huh?

I'll let you know about that a little later.

There's one thing you can tell me right now.

Have you seen any more of my ex-boss, if you know what I mean?

I know what you mean.

I haven't seen him and I don't intend to.

You don't know that man like I do.

He'll be around, but so will I.

WOMAN: Oh, Judy.

You certainly get the cute ones.

Miss Durling wants to see you.

Thanks, honey.

Miss Gray, this is Private Randolph Parker.

How do you do, Miss Gray?

I've been very anxious to meet you.

How do you do?

DURLING: Mr. Parker saw you in the Recreation Hall tonight

and asked for a formal introduction.

Yes. You see, I'm new around here,

and I don't make friends very easily.

So I thought if Miss Durling could spare you,

you might show me around.

You don't know your way around?

Not in this neighborhood.

Now, run along, you two.

Take good care of her, Randolph. I'll do my best.

And thank you, Miss Durling, more than you know.

I had to see you. I want to tell you...

This is the main Recreation Hall.

Soda, soft drinks and ice cream

may be purchased at the fountain

as well as candy, cigarettes, cigars and razor blades.

Now, look, Judy...

In the reading room,

youWlfind the latest copies of all magazines,

as well as a carefully selected library.

The post office is the first building to the west.

Which way is west?

That way.

You go out this door and turn...

I'd never find that.

A Yale man.

There's the post office. You can see it from here.

How about forgetting what happened on the train?

What happened on the train?

It was all your own fault, you know.

My fault? Certainly.

Five double malts.

Why don't you order another one

and make it an even half a dozen?

I don't want to make a pig out of myself.

Herbie?

Yes. Corp?

(WHISTLES)

Vvhoevertouches the heads of those double malts

dies like a dog, unquote.

Ask any man if he'd pass up a chance to kiss you.

Nonsense.

I'll prove it to you. Hey, soldier. Hey.

Private Parker? Yes?

Captain Williams wants to see you right away. Excuse me.

That's fine. Maybe he's heard from the old man. I'd better go.

Of course. Wait here. I'll be right back.

Okay, Corp, she's all yours.

(WHISTLES) Thanks,paL

I think you'll find it on the first shelf.

You may not know it, but you've just been rescued.

What do you mean?

The captain doesn't want to see Parker.

But I want to see you.

I get it. The old army game, huh?

Hiya, neighbor. How you feeling?

Not a penny. Now, come on.

Herb, did I ask you for any money?

You got that look in your eye.

Listen, you cleaned me out in that crap game, didn't you?

You gave me a lesson, that's all I know.

Do me a favor. Loan me $50.

Smitty, I can't.

I can't lend you $50. Yes, you can.

No,I can%. All I got is $40. That's all.

All right, give me the $40 and you owe me 10.

Okay. I owe you 10.

That's right.

How come I owe you 10?

What did I ask you for? 50.

How much did you give me? 40.

So you owe me $10.

That's right.

But you owe me 40.

Now, don't change the subject.

I'm not changing the subject.

You're trying to change my finances.

Come on, now. Give me my $40.

All right, there's your $40.

Now give me the $10 you owe me.

I'm paying you on account. On account?

On account I don't know how I owe it to you.

If that's the way you feel about it,

it's the last time I'll ever ask you for the loan of $50.

Wait a minute, Smitty.

How can I loan you $50 now?

All I have is 30.

Well, give me the 30, and you owe me 20.

Okay. This is getting worse all the time.

First I owe him 10, now I owe him 20.

Why do you run yourself into debt?

I'm not running in. You're pushing me.

I can't help it if you can't handle yourfinances.

I do all right with my money.

And you're doing all right with mine, too.

Now, wait a minute. I asked you for the loan of $50.

You gave me 30.

So, you owe me $20. 20 and 30 is 50.

No. No, no, no. 25 and 25 is 50.

All right, here's your $30.

Now give me back the 20 you owe me.

Fine guy. Won't loan a pal $50.

How can I loan you 50? All I got now is 10.

VVait. To show you that I'm your pal, you want to double that?

Go ahead. See you later.

I don't want that kind of money.

On the up-and-up. Hold it.

Take a number, any number at all

from one to 10 and don't tell me.

I got it.

Istherunnber odd or even? Even.

Is the number between one and three?

No.

Between three and five?

No. I think I got him.

Between five and seven? Yeah.

Number six? Right.

HOW did he do that?

(EXCLAIMS)

(REVEILLE PLAYING)

See how I rolled that pack?

Very neatly.

Some of you men have been getting away with murder.

Brown, let me see you do it.

Now ain't this a fine thing for the army to give anybody?

What's the matter?

By the time you get this here thing rolled and packed,

you'd be too tired to fight.

Snap into it, Brown.

It's mutiny.

How can you be so stupid?

That just comes to me natural.

(HORN HONKING)

Well, goodbye, boys.

It's been nice knowing you.

Parker, where do you think you're going?

I just saw my father drive in. I thought I'd...

Never mind about that.

You stay here until the instruction period's over.

All right, Brown, on his back now, on his back.

No! Not you, you idiot!

The pack. Put the pack on his back.

I thought we were going for a piggyback ride.

I haven't played piggyback since I was a kid.

You're still a kid. I'm playing now.

All right. Come on. Get it on.

You heard what the captain says.

You've got more left hands than the entire company.

That's good, huh?

Quiet.

I'll pick it up later.

I'll put it in my own pocket.

Get up there, will you?

Give him a hand, Smith. Give him a hand.

You know what he said, give me a hand.

Give him a hand.

(GASPS)

Oh, hello. What are you doing tonight?

You imbecile!

Get your silly carcass off of me!

I'll... I'll... Sergeant Collins.

I'll attend to you later.

What's cooking, Sarge?

Get out of here.

Private Parker, report to brigade headquarters immediately.

Thanks, Sergeant.

Well, boys, looks like this is it.

All right, Mr. Parker, we'll try to see things your way.

Private Parker reporting, sir.

Captain Williams ordered me to report to you.

At ease.

Hello, Dad. Hello, Son.

You're looking better than your letters intimated.

Ifeelfine, but I thought you'd forgotten about me.

Your mother didn't give me a chance.

I came down here as soon as I could.

Did you fix everything up?

I had a little difficulty, but everything's arranged.

That's fine.

Well, why don't you take a look around

while I get out of my uniform?

I can't.

Why not?

Because I have to return to Washington at once,

because you're not getting out of that uniform.

Dad, you just said that you'd...

That I just fixed everything up. VVeH,lhave.

It seems that your father has a little more respect for army life

and army institutions than you have, Parker.

We were quite ready to cooperate

with the Washington authorities...

But I talked them out of it.

This camp may be short of sport roadsters and chorus girls,

but it's excellently equipped to make a man out of a playboy.

You're going to stay here the full year and like it.

(SINGING) I'll be with you

In apple blossom time

I'll be with you

To change your name to mine

Maybe one day in May

I'll come and say

Happy the bride

That the sun shines on today

What a wonderful

Wedding there will be

What a wonderful

Day for you and me

Church bells will chime

You will be mine

In apple blossom

Time

I'll be with you

When?

In apple blossom time

Then what will you do?

Then I'll be with you

To change your name to mine

When Will that be?

One day maybe in May

Then what will you do?

I'll come and say to you, dear

Happy the bride that

The sun shines on today

Then what a wonderful

Wedding there will be

One day in May

What a very, very wonderful day

For you and me, dear

Church bells will chime

You will be mine

When?

In apple

In apple blossom time

(HUMMING)

Did I remember to say thanks for keeping this date?

Mere curiosity.

Curiosity?

Uh-huh.

Why a certain soldier decided to stay in the army,

that's gossip item number one in camp today.

Maybe he wanted to be near you.

Of course.

It couldn't be because he decided

the army might do him some good?

What good?

My dad had some pretty fair ideas aboutthat

He was a captain in the Fighting 69th.

I remember Mother telling me how he always believed

that army life changed boys into men.

He always said it was the great leveler.

It doesn't care how much a man has in the bank or how little.

All the army cares about is how much of a man a man can be.

You're wasting your breath on him, Judy.

The captain wants to see you at once.

Very funny.

Tell him I can't make it right now.

And on your way, soldier.

Oh, no. This is as far as I go.

I said on your way.

I said this is as far as I go.

All right, we'll just have to pretend that you're not here.

Now then, Judy, about Sunday, how do you think we should start our day?

Judy's promised to spend her day off with me.

Why don't we let Judy decide about that?

Martin, did you tell Parker the captain wanted to see him?

I did, Sergeant.

What are you waiting for, an engraved invitation?

I thought he was kidding. You get on over there.

The captain's been waiting for you so long he's got corns on his hips.

Okay, Sarge. Goodbye, Judy.

And, you, Martin. Yes, Sergeant?

That bed of yours looks like a goat's nest.

And your pillow. What have you been doing, picking a chicken?

What? I left it in order.

I suppose somebody else messed it up.

Somebody did...

Well, you straighten it out. Now, get going.

Judy,HLH Get going, soldier.

Don't tell me he needs a valet to keep his things in order.

Well, as a matter of fact, he's rather neat about it.

It took me every bit of 10 minutes to scramble it up.

Say, by the way, isn't Sunday your day off?

Why, Sergeant.

One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four.

Detail, halt.

Get back there. You first four, form in.

Right face.

Forward, march.

Detail, halt! Left face!

Order arms!

(GASPS)

(GROANS)

You four men are undoubtedly the dumbest numbskulls

I've ever had the misfortune of drilling.

Private Smith, fall out.

Smith, you seem to know what this is all about.

I want you to take over these men

and drill them for half an hour

and see if you can sweat some sense into them.

I'm exhausted.

The rest of you men follow me.

Forward, march.

Dick, put my gun in the tent.

Left.

Attention.

Never mind that.

That's my pal. Big man. He's a captain.

Wipe that smile off your face.

Wipe it off!

It's off, I mean... Quiet!

I mean... Quiet!

What are you doing? I'm talking to myself.

Well, don't talk so loud!

Well, I gotta hear what I got to say.

Quiet. Count off.

One, two, three, four.

BingQ!

Now you behave yourself, do you understand?

I won't warn you again.

Get your chins up! Get your chest out!

(COUGHS) Throw out your chest.

Get your chest out! Throw it out!

I'm not through with it yet. Quiet!

Right shoulder arms!

(GRUNTS)

Come on. Pick it up.

I thought I had it. All right!

Pick it up! Come on, come on. Snap into it.

What's the matter? Big man now...

Quiet!

Okay, Okay-

Order arms.

I'll have a cap pistol.

You keep quiet.

I won't warn you again. All right. All right.

All right! Pick on somebody else.

Quiet.

Right shoulder arms!

I said right shoulder arms. That's your left shoulder.

I'm left-handed. Get it over.

It feels better over here!

Get it over there!

What a nut.

Get it over there!

Left shoulder arms! Right shoulder arms!

Why don't you make up your mind?

Get back there. Come on.

Right shoulder arms! Left shoulder arms!

SMITH: Quiet! Quiet!

Do as you're told. Order arms.

Right shoulder arms! Left shoulder arms!

Quiet!

Present arms!

Come on, I don't want it. I don't want it!

Do you want it?

Put it up there. Get it up!

Get it up! Right face.

Come on. Come on. Left face.

Turn with the rest of them.

That guy hit me.

Well, turn with the rest of them.

Pick it up.

Right face!

Oh, come on. Left face.

Pick up that gun! Now do as you're told.

Turn with the rest of them.

Pick it up!

Right face. Right face.

Forward march.

Halt. Halt. Halt. Where are you going?

I don't know. I don't know.

You don't know? Well, find out.

Now, get with it.

What time is it? None of your business.

Okay-

About face.

Forward march.

Hi, fellas. Halt! Halt!

You guys are going the wrong way.

Will you get in line here?

I don't know. You got me in this mess, brother.

Get a load of this.

Right face. Forward march. Halt!

Right face.

Forward march.

Halt.

Right face.

Forward march.

(GROANS) Halt!

Get a load of this.

Left face.

Gently.

Right face. Right face.

(MUTTERS)

(EXHALES)

Boy, what a time we had with them three.

Forward march.

My feet are killing me,

(MOANS)

and do these shoes hurt.

Well, no wonder, man.

Look what you've got in them.

How do you like that?

And I thought I had fallen arches.

Boy, am I dumb. You are dumb.

And to prove to you how dumb you really are,

suppose you had $5 in this pants pocket and $10 in this pants pocket.

What would you have? The captain's pants on.

There you are. You see?

What are you asking me those kind of questions for?

They're all silly...

Why don't you ask me a nice easy one? All right.

Ask me something about that big, a small one.

All right. Will you answer it? Yeah.

All right, say you're 40 years old.

You're 40... Who's 40?

Well, I mean, just suppose you're 40...

If I was 40 years old,

I wouldn't be bathing my feet here in the water.

I wouldn't be in the army. All right. Now, wait a minute.

I mean, after all, I took my uncle's advice.

My uncle told me. He said, "Herbie, you go in the army." That's all.

What uncle? Uncle Sam.

All right. I understand... Yes, yes.

He's my uncle, your uncle.

He's everybody's uncle in the army. Yes, yes, yes.

I understand. He's the only relative I got.

Wait. Wait a minute. I like my Uncle Sam.

I know. We all do.

But, look, answer this question.

You're 40 years old

and you're in love with a little girl, say, 10 years old.

This one's gonna be a pip. Wait till I finish.

Now I'm going around

with a 10-year-old girl. Well, wait a minute.

You got a good idea where I'm gonna wind up.

Will you wait a minute, please? Look, you're 40 years old,

and you're in love with this little girl that's 10 years old.

Now you're four times as old as that girl.

You couldn't marry her, could you?

Not unless I come from the mountains.

There you go. You see...

Why don't you ask me something...

Wait a minute. Wait till I finish this.

You're 40. She's 10.

You're four times as old as that girl.

Now you couldn't marry her, so you wait five years.

Now the little girl is 15. You're 45.

You're only three times as old as that little girl.

So you wait 15 years more.

Now the little girl is 30. You're 60.

You're only twice as old as that little girl.

She's catching up.

Well, yes. Yes. Now here's the question.

How long do you have to wait before

you and that little girl are the same age?

What kind of question is that? Answer the question.

That's ridiculous. What's ridiculous about it?

If I keep waiting for that girl, she'll pass me up.

What are you talking about?

She'll wind up older than I am.

(EXC LAIIVIS) SheWlhave to wait for me.

Why should she wait for you?

I was nice enough to wait for her!

Go to bed.

If that girl don't want to marry me, she don't have to marry me.

That's silliness.

I mean, after all, I like her, I'll marry her.

That's your whole trouble.

VVait a minute. Where are you putting that water? Throw it out.

Okay. Brown! Smitty!

You! You! I'll strangle you!

Oh, I'm a bad boy!

MAN: Ready. Aim.

Fire!

Nice shooting. ALL: Nice shooting.

(CHATTERING)

MAN: Boy, that's swell.

Great shooting, Parker. Great shooting.

Here. Keep this and have it framed.

What for?

That isn't half as tough as a round of skeet.

(GUNSHOT)

It's a shame.

He's just as good as he thinks he is.

He's plenty good with a gun, all right.

You're not so bad yourself.

How are the men doing, Sergeant?

Best in the regiment.

Oh, yeah'?

I got some Tennessee boys in my company

that can shoot the spots out of the five of spades at 300 yards.

You call that shooting?

Why, our boys at 500 yards can shuffle a deck of cards.

Maybe we can cook up a five-man match.

Any day-

VVeH,boys,our fortunes are made.

Every dime of this company's money is

on that rifle match tomorrow, over $500.

Including my buck and a half.

Including the works. We're all in but Parker.

What's the matter? Won't he bet on himself?

Collins said not to tell him.

Why not?

Well, Sarge figures that there's not enough "L" Company money

to cover that millionaire's idea of a small bet.

What odds did you get?

Herbie's placing the money.

ALL: Herbie?

Now, don't get excited, boys.

With his baby face, they'll feel sorry for him.

They're apt to give him 5-to-4 or 7-to-5.

What do you mean, 5-to-4 or 7-to-5?

I got us a real bet. ALL: You did?

10-110-1.

ALL: 10-110-1.

Certainly, that's the... Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Who put up the 10?

I did. Ten of ours to one of theirs. 10-to-1.

You did?

Mmm-hmm.

What's the matter?

Did I do something wrong again?

COLLINS: Parker!

How's you r tfiggerfingen my boy?

I haven't made up my mind yet.

Good afternoon, ma'am.

You're going my WaY?

(GUNFIRE) Hello.

If you're waiting for Martin, he won't be able to keep his date.

Oh, I see. The captain wanted to see him.

No, he's shooting with the company rifle team. Hear him?

I thought you were the star of the team.

I was until this morning.

And then the strangest thing happened to my wrist.

I could hardly move it.

So when I told Captain Williams aboutfl,

he replaced me with the sixth man on the score sheet.

And Bob was the sixth man, of course.

Of course.

How does your wrist feel now?

(GUNFIRE) What do you think?

And you walked out on your rifle team

just to chisel a date with me, is that it?

You're a lot more attractive than any target in this camp.

The men you sold out, your company,

bet every cent they had on the team on you.

They did?

I didn't know that.

I'll make their losses good.

With what, money?

What else?

It's just that easy for you, isn't it?

Well, I'll tell you one thing.

There's no price tag on loyalty or friendship.

I didn't ask for this uniform.

Why should I take it seriously?

After what you did today,

the only friend you'll have in camp is

the guy who looks at you out of the mirror.

And if he had any sense,

he'd stay as far away from you as I'm going to!

Wait a minute!

Hello, boys.

I'm sorry we lost the rifle match.

What do you mean "we"?

I want to make your losses good

if you'll tell me how much you dropped.

Think I'll take a walk.

There's a strange smell around here.

Wait a minute, boys. I said I was sorry.

What do you want me to do, back flips?

Yeah, wise guy, and we're just the boys that can flip...

Now, listen, you...

Don't you sock him, Henry!

Come on now. Attaboy, Bob.

Bop him.

Give it to him, Bob.

(BUGLE PLAYING)

Bob!

Jiggers, the sergeant!

(GROANS)

Hey, jiggers! Jiggers, the sergeant!

(BUGLE CONTINUES)

We'll finish this later. You mean I will!

Herbie, the light! The light!

No, no, no, turn it out. Turn it out.

What kind of a brawl is going on in here?

Don't you recruits dummy up on me!

Oh, so it's you, eh?

Yeah, it's me.

I wasn't doing anything. I wasn't doing any fighting.

I guess that's how you got that black eye, eh?

Yeah. I got a black eye? Ooh!

Dry up!

Keep quiet or you'll find yourself on K.P.

I don't want to hear another peep out of this tent.

Douse that light.

Okay. Won't go out. What a life.

What an army and what a sergeant to have in the army.

Give me liberty or give me death. That's me.

(JAZZ PLAYING ON RADIO)

Who's playing that radio?

Nobody. It's playing by itself.

Turn it off!

Be quiet in here. The men have to get up at 5:45 in the morning.

Go on and play it.

You heard what the guy said.

What are you worrying about him? He's only the sergeant.

What are you, scared of him?

Play the radio and play it loud.

(MUTTERING)

(MUSIC PLAYING)

What did I tell you?

Didn't I tell you the men were sleeping?

Didn't I tell you they have to get up at 5:45 in the morning?

Now don't play it!

Go on and play it.

You're an American citizen, aren't you?

This is a free country, isn't it?

Go on and play the radio.

If he comes in here again, I'll tell him off.

You'll tell him? You leave it to me.

Play it.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

Didn't I say not to play that thing?

Yeah.

Didn't I say the men were sleeping?

When are you gonna tell him?

What are you going to do about it?

Look here, Brown. I don't like wise guys. Sorry.

The next wisecrack out of you,

somebody's gonna punch you right in the nose.

I'd like to see you do it.

I'll do it, all right!

Why don't you be quiet like your buddy here?

Remember, the next wisecrack out of you,

I'll punch you right in the nose.

Yes, you will.

Yes, I will!

When are you gonna tell him?

Nobody loves me.

Who's got a pencil and paper?

I'm gonna write the President of the United States a letter.

What's the matter now, Herbie?

I'm gonna hand in my notice.

Don't look now, brother, but you're missing a leg.

What are you, a wise guy or a salesman?

I've been around.

Did I hear a radio playing in here?

What radio? There's no radio in here.

Don't let me hear any carousing. Yes, ma'am.

What? Yes, sir.

That's better.

Well, you got to be one or the other.

Go ahead and play it.

You heard what the sergeant said.

Never mind him. I'll take care of him.

It's a free country, ain't it? Yes.

You an American citizen? Yes.

Go ahead and play it and loud. You know...

Wait a minute. Now, take it easy.

I'm on your side. Please, be my friend.

That sergeant always makes me boil.

I'd like to fry that guy in oil.

No matter what you do he's always squawking.

But you just wait and don't forget.

I'll get to be a captain yet.

And that's the day that I'll do all the talking.

(ALL SINGING) Three cheers for the red, white and Captain Brown

Hep, hep, hep, hooray!

My buddy...

What did you do?

I'll scramble it later.

When I become a captain, the title will be strictly unofficial.

I won't be highfalutin.

Forget about saluting.

Step up and call me by my first initial.

Three cheers for the red, white and Captain "B"

Hep, hep, hep, hooray!

My buddy...

Snow this time of the year? It's marvelous.

Well, I'll see you later.

When I become a captain,

there will be no bugle calls to spoil your slumber.

There will be no K.P. duties, and we'll draft a bunch of cuties,

and instead of doing drills, we'll do the rumba!

What are you doing? What are you doing?

Three cheers for the red, white and Captain Brown

Hep, hep, hep, hooray!

What do you think is wrong with this army?

I'm glad you asked me that, my friend,

and I can tell you in just two words. Plenty.

Get the rest of the boys down here, I'll tell it.

Come on, fellas.

Now, the way I see it...

(SINGING) There's too much cold and too much heat

Too many MPs walking the beat

Too many hikes and too many marches

Too many feet with fallen arches

Too much water in the soup

Too many pairs of pants that droop

Too many orders, too many drills Iodine and quinine pills

Too much mud and too much rain

Too many aches and too much pain

Too many blisters, too many corns

Too many drums and too many horns

(INHALES)

Too much working like a slave

Too many spuds that need a shave

Too many rules and too much law

Well, it's the darndest mess I ever saw!

Three cheers for the red, white and Captain Brown

Hep, hep, hep, hooray!

So you want to be a captain, huh?

Well, I've had a talk with the general about you.

We've decided to make you an admiral.

Admiral? Ooh, ooh!

Do they have admirals in the army?

Sure.

We're going to put you in charge of all the vessels.

Oh, goody.

Vessels.

(MEN SHOUTING)

Hi, boys. Good fight, eh?

There's a couple of seats over there.

Excuse me.

(CHEERING)

Hello, Judy. Can I see you a minute?

Excuse me.

(BAND PLAYING LIVELY MUSIC)

(BELL RINGS)

Next bout, four rounds!

Private Bill McGuire of "L" Company

(CHEERING)

challenges any man.

Particularly any man from "K" Company.

(CHEERING)

Men, are we gonna backwater and let them get away with that?

ALL: No! Are we?

What are you looking at me for? Certainly not.

Not after the way those "L" men

clipped us in that rifle match.

Yeah, that rifle match.

Remember that, boys?

Who's gonna stand up and volunteer for the honor of "K" Company?

Somebody over here should volunteer, over there.

Well, who's gonna stand up and volunteer?

Wow!

(CHEERING)

That's the proper company spirit.

Come on. I've got some trunks that'll fit you perfectly.

I don't wanna fight that guy.

I ain't even mad at him.

You mean to say you're scared of that little guy over there?

I mean to tell you that I'm...

Is that the guy I'm gonna fight? Yeah.

Tell that fellow to stay in the ring.

He's a pushover. Sure.

I can picture myself now,

the place is crowded, I'm coming down the aisle,

ljump in the ring, I throw off my robe,

and the whole crowd lets out a terrific roar.

What happened?

I forgot to put on my pants.

(ALL LAUGHING)

You'll be fine. Come on.

Come on. Come on, Smitty.

(CHEERING)

Okay, boys, okay. Relax.

Entertain yourselves till Private Brown gets into his fighting togs.

(SINGING) He was a famous trumpet man from out Chicago way

He had a boogie style that no one else could play

He was the top man at his craft

But then his number came up and he was gone with the draft

He's in the army now a-blowing reveille

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

They made him blow a bugle for his Uncle Sam

It really brought him down because he couldn't jam

The captain seemed to understand

Because the next day the cap went out and drafted a band

And now the company jumps when he plays reveille

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

(HUMMING)

He blows at eight to the bar in boogie rhythm

He can't blow a note unless a bass and guitar

ls playing with him

He makes the company jump when he plays reveille

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

He was a boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

And when he played boogie-woogie bugle

He was busy as a buzz bee

And when he plays he makes the company jump eight to the bar

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

(HUMMING)

He blows it eight to the bar

He can't blow a note if the bass and guitar isn't with him

The company jumps when he plays reveille

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

He puts the boys to sleep with boogie every night

And wakes them up the same way in the early bright

They clap their hands and stamp their feet

Because they know how he plays when someone gives him a beat

He really breaks it up when he plays reveille

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

(HUMMING)

The company jumps when he plays reveille

He's the boogie-woogie bugle boy of Company "B"

(ALL CHEERING)

(WHISTLING)

(WHISTLING)

Take it easy, champ, take it easy.

Funny how some people never get wise to themselves.

Hey, what am I, a yard bird?

Presenting the human buzz saw of "K" Company, Herbie Brown!

(CHEERING)

I'll take it easy with you, kid. I won't hurt you.

(BLOWS AIR)

(WHISTLES)

Come on, Herbie!

Come on, Ham and Eggs!

Attaboy, champ.

Oh, ain't it cute?

(SINGING) And my heart belongs to Herbie

Now listen, kid, when you get out there,

give him that old one-three, one-three.

What happened to two? Two, you get.

Right. Huh?

You're too light for him, kid, so they sent me in.

Gee, thanks.

Attaboy, champ.

MAN: And as referee of this special event,

Sergeant Collins of "K" Company.

(BELL DINGS)

COLLINS: All right, boys, instructions.

(WHIMPERS)

Come back here!

Oh, come on. What's the matter with you?

Come on, come on.

(WHIMPERS) Come on.

All right now, you boys know the rules.

No fighting in the clinches, break clean

and no hitting below the belt.

You mean I can't do that?

You can't do this with the thumb, either.

I can do that.

That's all right, but you can't do that.

(GROANS) All right. Back to your corners and come in fighting.

I don't want to fight.

MAN 1: Come on, Jack!

MAN 2: Come on, Herbie!

(SHOUTING)

(WHISTLING)

Get in there and fight!

Mix it up. Where is he?

You can't find me.

That didn't hurt.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven...

Count, count, count!

MAN 2: Come on, Herbie. All right, mix it up.

Herbie, give him the one-three.

The one-three.

COLLINS: Okay, break, break, break.

One-three, one-three!

Two !

All right, break. Break it...

Oh, what a pretty picture.

On, you like it?

Yeah!

Qne!

Come on. Count!

Two! Think you can get up?

Three! Should I get you some water?

Come on!

Three and a half!

Three and three-quarters! Come on, that's it.

Right, give him a chance. Give him a chance!

COLLINS: Come on now, mix it, boys. Herbie.

Give him the old shoestring gag.

Hey, your shoelace is untied!

Which one?

(GROANS)

Two, four, six, eight... Wait a minute!

What's this two, four, six, eight, ten?

What happened to one, three, five, seven and nine?

I don't like them numbers. They're odd.

Put them in! I like them!

Get in there and make him...

(BELL DINGS)

All right. Break it up. Break it up.

Are you all right?

You've got the best of him, haven't you?

You'd like to go 20 rounds, wouldn't you?

I know.

Come here. What a lucky guy that guy is.

The bell just saved him.

Hey, look, I want you to go out there this round

and just keep on wearing him down.

What are you trying to do, make me look bad in there?

You're a...

Come here a minute. Look at him.

Look at him. He's all worn out.

You're fresh as a daisy.

(LOUD CHEERING)

(REVEILLE PLAYING)

Shut off that alarm clock.

All right, you guys, come on. All out.

Come on, Herbie, get up.

Full marching order in 15 minutes.

Yes, sir.

"K" Company, full marching order in 15 minutes!

"K" Company present and accounted for, sir.

March your company out. Yes, sir.

Right shoulder arms!

Right face!

Forward ho!

I'm gonna write my congressman about this.

Yeah. What's the idea?

Quiet! No talking in the ranks!

Cover!

(SPITS)

What did I have to join the army for?

To defend your native soil.

Well, they don't have to feed it to me.

What is this all about?

Looks like a sham battle to me.

A sham battle?

Yeah. I should have stayed home in bed.

Good morning, ladies and gentlemen of the radio audience.

This is Mike Frankovitch speaking to you

directly from the central observation point

for the most extensive army maneuvers ever

attempted by the United States in peacetime.

Just remember, you're being watched by umpires, by staff officers

whose duty it will be to report on the conduct of every company.

Unofficially, I can tell you that

the company receiving the best report

will be named top company of this regiment.

How can the umpire figure out the right answer

if we don't really shoot the other guy?

Oh, that's easy. Everybody knows that.

All you do is... You tell him.

With a book of rules.

For example, Smitty,

if 10 of our men of the White Army

catch up with eight men of the Blue Army,

we outnumber them, so we've captured them.

They cut loose five of their tanks

against one of ours, our tank is destroyed.

We have a plane that drops a flour sack,

that is supposed to be a bomb.

If it lights on a battery of field artillery, the battery is wiped out.

You understand?

Yeah, but how do I know if I get killed?

The umpire hangs a sign on you reading,

"This mug is as dead as he looks."

Well, you see, that's the only way they could...

(ALL LAUGH)

All the latest developments in mechanized air and land equipment

are being employed in this extensive maneuver.

Present here to observe these maneuvers,

in addition to commanding officers of the two opposing armies,

are high-ranking officials of the war department,

as well as military observers from Central and South America.

(ARTILLERY FIRE)

(ARTILLERY FIRE CONTINUES)

(EXPLOSIONS CONTINUE)

Take cover over there on signal, men.

All right, head out.

(WHISTLES)

VVait a minute. Where's Herbie? Where's... What?

(WHIMPERING)

Herbie! How did you get up in that tree?

How did I get up in a tree?

I sat on it when it was an acorn!

(WHIMPERS)

RADIO ANNOUNCER: Latest reports from the front indicate

that the Blue Army is rapidly approaching the Schuylerton Reservoir.

And it appears certain that they will gain control of that vital spot

and be declared the winner of these maneuvers.

Men, three miles west of here is a blockhouse.

That's a marker for the Schuylerton Reservoir.

Our section has been given the vital job of getting to that blockhouse

and blowing it up before it can be surrounded by the Blue Army.

Now, we've got orders here to split up

into three patrols of four men.

Each patrol will attempt to gain

the objective from a different approach.

One must get through and blow up that blockhouse

before it's captured by the Blue Army.

Now, the first patrol, Corporal Martin in charge,

Parker, Smith and Brown.

(EXPLOSIONS)

(AIRCRAFTS HUMMING)

Give us your rifle.

Now, come on. Me, me. Stand still. Oh, you.

MARTIN: Shake a leg, Smitty.

(HERBIE GRUNTING)

SMITH: Wait a minute. Hold still, now.

Lift it up. MARTIN: Shake a leg, Smitty.

(COUGHS)

Nobody. Come on. Wait for me, will you?

All right, come on, fellas.

Hey. Martin!

Look out. Look out, Smitty, that's loose rock.

Climb on up to the next ledge.

Grab my ankle!

Climb up over me.

Work your way around that next ledge and go back.

Thanks, fella. You saved my life.

You owe me a nickel.

You all right? Yeah.

Let's go.

Your inexperienced soldiers have done a fine job

holding out as long as they did.

They have done splendidly, but the maneuver isn't lost yet.

One of our patrols hasn't been captured.

It's just possible that those men might reach their objective.

MARTIN: Well, it looks like we got here ahead of the Blue Army.

Yeah.

Go on. Get down there and blow up the blockhouse.

So you can tell Judy how you gave me

a chance to be a hero? Oh, no.

It's better than having her think

I grabbed off the glory by outranking you.

Go on. Get going.

Look!

Look, a Blue Army patrol heading for the blockhouse.

Give me your pistol, quick.

What are you gonna do?

Surround the Blues with the whole company.

What?

You blow up the blockhouse as soon as you get a chance.

I'll attract their attention and draw them away.

Why, those kid soldiers.

I'll bet not one of them comes

within a mile of that blockhouse.

Not a chance with every road covered.

Let's get over there and hoist a couple of blue flags on it.

(GUNFIRE)

What the...

(GUNFIRE CONTINUES)

There might be more of them than us,

but we've gotta get over there and head them off.

Come on. Up and at them.

(GUNFIRE RESUMES)

Hello, boys. Looking for me?

Oh, there you are, Parker.

I've been looking all over camp for you.

Why aren't you over with the other fellows?

They seem a bit allergic to me, or hadn't you noticed?

Report to brigade headquarters immediately.

Thanks, Sergeant.

Private Parker, sir.

Captain Williams ordered me to report to you.

At ease. MR. PARKER: Hello, Son.

Hello, Dad. Nice seeing you.

General Emerson has some news for you.

A transfer to the Officers Training SchooL

No, thank you, sir.

Don't you want a commission?

I want one very much, sir.

But I've heard that it's possible

to get an appointment from the ranks.

Thanks for the string-pulling, Dad.

I had nothing to do with this transfer.

That's right. You were recommended by your colonel

along with other men who've shown exoepfionalabflfly.

Thank you, sir.

Hello, Randy. How're you feeling, kid?

You sure put it over, pal.

MAN 1: How are you, Randy?

MAN 22 Hello, soldier.

MAN 3: Howdy, Randy.

MAN 4: Hello, Randy, boy.

Nice going, soldier.

Save me a dance later.

And remind me to give you my phone number.

Attaboy, soldier.

(SINGING) Say, what kind of beat is that?

Man, that really spins my hat

Doesn't sound like boogie-woogie

But it's really got a beat

Seems to us that it's in four

Let us hear it just once more

Come on and latch on to that rhythm

'Cause a solid four's my meat

Some folks like to hear an eight-beat rhythm

I don't go for that stuff no more

Anytime you really want to send me

Bounce me, brother, with a solid four

Come on in, the whole place is jumping

Everybody's out on the floor

If you want to keep the rhythm pumping

Bounce me, brother, with a solid four

The boogie-woogie was never like this

We got a new beat that no one can miss

If boogie-woogie sent you like I think it did

Four to the bar will flip your lid

Move the tables and roll the rug up

Shut the windows and lock the door

While I try to take the Little Brown Jug up

Bounce me, brother, with a solid four

(HUMMING)

The joint is jumping as it never did before

(HUMMING)

They're saying bounce me, brother with a solid four

The boogie-woogie was never like this

We got a new beat that no one can miss

If boogie-woogie sent you like I think it did

Four to the bar will flip your lid

Move the tables and roll the rug up

Shut the windows and lock the door

While I try to take the Little Brown Jug up

Bounce me, brother, with a solid four

(ALL CHEERING)

Randy! Come on. I'll buy you a soda. Hello, Randy.

Soda, nothing. I'll buy you a man's drink.

A double malted.

Ithoughtyou guys were broke. BOTH: Broke?

Does this look like we were broke?

Boy, we just about busted the Blue Army at 1 O-to-1, thanks to you.

To me? Yes.

Bob's told us and everybody else

how you won the sham battle for us.

Bob told you about... Yeah.

You know, it's really something,

overcoming the handicap of being a millionaire.

Gee, I wish I was handicapped like that.

May I have this dance, soldier?

What are we waiting for?

Make way, boys.

Another handicap. Excuse me.

Hello, boys. Did I clean out the Blue Army? Did you?

What about us? Show him, Herbie.

Look what I won.

Did you ever shoot dice?

Dice? No.

Shall we step in here?

I would be glad to accept your most cordial invitation.

Follow on. Clubhouse.

No cutting. I'm sorry. Who wants to cut?

The captain wants to see you.

Oh, not that old gag.

Look,paL this is my last night in camp

and my last dance with our girl.

Now, isn't that a coincidence? Mine, too.

You, too?

Officers Training School in the morning.

Oh, that's swell, Bob. Congratulations.

And thanks for everything.

What for?

Never mind.

BOTH: I'm gonna miss you a lot, Judy.

Oh, no, you're not.

BOTH: Oh, yes, we are.

All right, you take it.

We're gonna miss you, Judy.

I don't think so, because it so happens

that I've been transferred, too.

Don't tell me they have hostesses

at the Officers Training School?

Now, isn't that a coincidence?

We're lucky fellows.

Mr. Smith.

(TRUMPET BLOWING)

(SINGING) You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith

Look around you and get a good view

In the shops and stores and down in the mines

Everybody works for you

There are farmers plowing in the soil

And the factories are running full-speed

Just to thank you, hup, 100%

And we'll follow where you lead

Wheels are turning, and they're hard at work

The wealthy man, little man banker and clerk

They're punching for you so you do your part

AH the power they need is the beat of your heart

We're 130 million strong

And we're sticking with you right along

This is really your lucky day

So, buddy, what do you say?

Just throw your hats to the sky

Up where the stars and stripes fly

And keep your country rolling along

You're a lucky fellow, Mr. Smith