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1
00:00:01,802 --> 00:00:04,336
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
2
00:00:04,404 --> 00:00:06,771
AND NICKELODEON
3
00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:09,241
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
--www.ncicap.org--
4
00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:27,960
[CRASH!]
5
00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:37,535
AH HA HA HA HA HA!
6
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:48,613
I'M GONNA BE
A DOCTOR!
7
00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:49,982
I'LL BE A VETERINARIAN.
8
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,683
I WANNA BE
A FIREMAN!
9
00:00:51,752 --> 00:00:54,953
AND I WILL BE...
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00:00:55,022 --> 00:00:56,822
LORD OF ALL HUMANS!
11
00:00:58,692 --> 00:01:00,892
I'M GOING TO BE
A PROFESSIONAL
PARANORMAL INVESTIGATOR,
12
00:01:00,961 --> 00:01:01,926
SO THAT I CAN EXPOSE...
13
00:01:01,995 --> 00:01:03,795
HEY, I WASN'T FINISHED.
14
00:01:03,864 --> 00:01:07,099
WHEN I GROW UP,
I'M GONNA BE A ASTRONAUT.
15
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:09,100
WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE,
16
00:01:09,169 --> 00:01:12,404
I WANTED TO BE
AN ASTRONAUT, TOO,
MELVIN.
17
00:01:16,143 --> 00:01:19,077
AND THEN
MY SHIP IMPLODED
18
00:01:19,146 --> 00:01:20,812
IN THE VACUUM OF SPACE.
19
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:28,921
THE LESSON HERE
IS THAT DREAMS INEVITABLY
LEAD TO HIDEOUS IMPLOSIONS.
20
00:01:28,989 --> 00:01:31,490
THAT'S WHY THE SCHOOL
HAS INSTITUTED THIS TEST.
21
00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:35,794
FROM THESE QUESTIONS,
WE WILL DETERMINE
YOUR FUTURE CAREERS.
22
00:01:35,863 --> 00:01:38,096
THEN YOU WILL BE
PARTNERED WITH AN ADULT
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00:01:38,165 --> 00:01:39,765
WHO WORKS IN YOUR FIELD.
24
00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:41,934
YOU WILL SPEND
THE REST OF THE DAY
25
00:01:42,002 --> 00:01:45,337
OBSERVING THEM
AND GETTING USED
TO YOUR WRETCHED FATES.
26
00:01:45,406 --> 00:01:48,172
WRITE WHAT YOU THINK
EACH BLOTCH LOOKS LIKE
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00:01:48,241 --> 00:01:49,841
ON THE LINE NEXT TO IT.
28
00:01:49,909 --> 00:01:52,210
ANSWER EACH ONE
CAREFULLY.
29
00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:54,112
YOUR FUTURE DEPENDS ON IT.
30
00:01:55,316 --> 00:01:56,748
WHAT DOES
IDENTIFYING BLOTCHES
31
00:01:56,817 --> 00:01:58,717
HAVE TO DO
WITH DETERMINING
OUR FUTURE CAREERS?
32
00:01:58,786 --> 00:02:01,285
OH, YOU POOR,
DOOMED CHILD.
33
00:02:02,556 --> 00:02:04,156
[THINKING]
HUMAN SLAVE.
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00:02:04,224 --> 00:02:06,558
HUMAN SLAVE.
35
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:15,600
GHOST.
36
00:02:15,669 --> 00:02:17,235
BIGFOOT.
37
00:02:20,507 --> 00:02:23,675
TIME'S UP.
PASS YOUR PAPERS FORWARD!
38
00:02:23,743 --> 00:02:25,777
UH...UH...
39
00:02:36,623 --> 00:02:40,291
THE MACHINE WILL NOW
DECIDE YOUR FATE.
40
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:46,197
BRIAN, YOU'RE GOING
TO BE A FIREMAN.
41
00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:48,166
BUT I WANTED TO BE
A DOCTOR.
42
00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:50,969
QUIET! THE MACHINE
HAS SPOKEN!
43
00:02:51,038 --> 00:02:53,771
SARAH, YOU ARE GOING
TO BE AN ASTRONAUT.
44
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:58,009
WAAAAAHHH!
45
00:02:58,078 --> 00:03:01,045
SPOON, YOU WILL BE
A VETERINARIAN.
46
00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:02,714
BUT I'M ALLERGIC
TO ANIMALS.
47
00:03:02,782 --> 00:03:05,617
DIB, YOU WILL BE A ...
48
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:07,786
PARANORMAL INVESTIGATOR.
49
00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:09,588
YES!
50
00:03:09,657 --> 00:03:14,158
ZIM, THE MACHINE SAYS
THAT THE ONLY CAREER
YOU ARE SUITABLE FOR IS...
51
00:03:14,227 --> 00:03:16,728
YES, YES,
LORD OF HUMANS!
52
00:03:16,797 --> 00:03:19,898
I WILL RULE YOU ALL
WITH AN IRON FIST!
53
00:03:19,967 --> 00:03:22,134
NO, ZIM.
54
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:26,438
THE MACHINE HAS ASSIGNED YOU
A CAREER IN FAST FOOD
PREPARATION.
55
00:03:26,506 --> 00:03:29,240
I WILL PREPARE FOOD
WITH MY IRON FIST.
56
00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:33,211
THEN I WILL WORK
MY WAY UP TO RULING
YOU ALL WITH MY FIST!
57
00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:35,413
YOU, OBEY THE FIST.
58
00:03:35,482 --> 00:03:38,183
[GROWLS]
59
00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:44,522
NOW, CHILDREN,
FIND YOUR PARTNER.
60
00:03:47,327 --> 00:03:49,427
[MEOW!]
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00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,273
WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH YOUR NECK, ZIM?
62
00:04:02,342 --> 00:04:03,841
SOME KIND OF
ALIEN SPORE?
63
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,143
OF COURSE NOT.
64
00:04:05,212 --> 00:04:07,512
WHERE CAN
I FIND ZIM?
65
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:10,382
I AM ZIM.
TAKE ME TO THE MEAT.
66
00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:13,518
OH, YOU'RE NOT
READY FOR MEAT
PREPARATION YET.
67
00:04:13,586 --> 00:04:15,520
WE START WITH
THE FRENCH FRIES.
68
00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:17,922
WHEN WE GET PROMOTED,
WE WORK WITH MEAT.
69
00:04:17,991 --> 00:04:20,091
LOOKS LIKE I'LL BE
GETTING TEAMED UP
70
00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:22,660
WITH A RESPECTED
PARANORMAL
INVESTIGATOR, ZIM.
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00:04:22,729 --> 00:04:24,596
HE'S SURE TO SEE
THROUGH YOUR PITIFUL
DISGUISE.
72
00:04:24,664 --> 00:04:26,731
AND THEN WE'LL TAKE
YOU BACK TO HIS
SECRET LAB
73
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:28,833
AND THEN WE'LL
PERFORM ALL KINDS
OF TESTS ON YOU--
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00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,335
HORRIBLE TESTS!
75
00:04:30,403 --> 00:04:31,669
SEE YA.
76
00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:35,407
LET'S TALK MORE ABOUT
THESE--PROMOTIONS.
77
00:04:35,475 --> 00:04:38,176
NOT NOW.
MY BREAK'S ALMOST OVER.
78
00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:50,488
AAAHHH!
79
00:04:59,333 --> 00:05:01,333
PSST, YOUR NAME DIB?
80
00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:02,334
YES.
81
00:05:02,402 --> 00:05:03,534
CALL ME BILL.
82
00:05:03,603 --> 00:05:05,336
I'VE GOT SOMETHING
TO SHOW YOU.
83
00:05:05,405 --> 00:05:06,972
THERE'S AN ACTUAL
ALIEN IN MY CLASS
AND I HAVE...
84
00:05:07,041 --> 00:05:08,507
SLOW DOWN, LITTLE MAN.
85
00:05:08,575 --> 00:05:10,975
TODAY, YOU'RE GOING
TO SEE THINGS THAT
ARE GOING TO
86
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:12,844
CHANGE THE WAY
YOU LOOK AT THE WORLD.
87
00:05:12,912 --> 00:05:14,879
KEEP YOUR EYES
AND YOUR MIND...
88
00:05:14,948 --> 00:05:16,447
OPEN.
89
00:05:16,516 --> 00:05:18,082
IT'S PRETTY OPEN.
90
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,018
I JUST WANNA...
91
00:05:20,087 --> 00:05:21,353
NO MORE TALKING.
92
00:05:21,422 --> 00:05:22,520
LET'S ROLL.
93
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:40,638
8 BILLION?!
94
00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:43,274
THAT IS MORE THAN
THE ENTIRE POPULATION.
95
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:46,511
AND THEY ALL SERVE
MacMEATIE?
96
00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:49,414
IF I RULE MacMEATIE'S,
97
00:05:49,483 --> 00:05:51,049
I RULE THE WORLD.
98
00:05:53,853 --> 00:05:56,788
YOU WANNA BE VERY
CAREFUL NOT TO TOUCH
ANY OF THE GREASE
99
00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,657
'CAUSE IT'S
KIND OF HOT.
100
00:05:58,726 --> 00:06:01,092
AND THEN, YOU ADD
THE MEAT SEASONING.
101
00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:02,827
FASCINATING!
102
00:06:02,895 --> 00:06:04,829
AND ONCE I HAVE
MASTERED THE FRENCH FRIES,
103
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:06,231
WHAT IS THE NEXT PROMOTION?
104
00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,966
AFTER FRIES,
YOU GET TO WORK
THE GRILL.
105
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:11,970
AND THEN, HOW MANY
PROMOTIONS UNTIL
I AM MADE
106
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:13,271
RULER OF THE PLANET?
107
00:06:13,340 --> 00:06:14,806
ABOUT 4.
108
00:06:17,611 --> 00:06:19,777
THE CORPORATIONS ARE BEHIND
A LOT OF THE CONSPIRACIES,
109
00:06:19,846 --> 00:06:23,481
BUT THE GOVERNMENT,
THEY'RE JUST ONE
BIG CONSPIRACY
LED BY...
110
00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:24,883
WHAT ARE THESE?
111
00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:26,451
OH, CASE FILES.
I BROUGHT THEM ALONG
112
00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:28,753
TO SHOW YOU
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
THE SERIOUS PARANORMAL
113
00:06:28,821 --> 00:06:29,955
AND THE FRAUDS.
114
00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,823
THE TOP BUNDLE
ARE THE REAL ONES.
115
00:06:31,892 --> 00:06:33,992
THE BOTTOM ONES ARE
ALL COMPLETE BUNK.
116
00:06:37,664 --> 00:06:38,796
FRANKENCHOKEY.
117
00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:44,435
THEY'RE FILED WRONG.
118
00:06:44,504 --> 00:06:46,838
YOU'VE GOT BIGFOOT
AND DINOSAURS IN
WITH THE FAKE STUFF.
119
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,974
YOU THINK THOSE
THINGS ARE REAL?
120
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:50,876
THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT THEY WANT
YOU TO BELIEVE.
121
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:54,012
THAT'S WHAT WHO
WANTS ME TO BELIEVE?
122
00:06:58,718 --> 00:07:00,285
WHAT'S THIS?
123
00:07:00,353 --> 00:07:02,687
THE GALACTIC
EQUINOX THEORY.
124
00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:04,189
AT 5 O'CLOCK TONIGHT,
125
00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:05,824
THE GALAXIES ARE
GOING TO BE PERFECTLY
LINED UP.
126
00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:08,326
MY COLLEAGUES BELIEVE
THAT THIS WILL CAUSE
127
00:07:08,394 --> 00:07:10,528
ALL THE ALIENS
THAT ARE LIVING OFF
THEIR OWN PLANET
128
00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:12,497
TO GO THROUGH A HIDEOUS
MOLT FOR A FEW SECONDS.
129
00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:14,065
DON'T READ
THAT GARBAGE.
130
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,100
THAT RASH ON ZIM'S NECK!
131
00:07:16,169 --> 00:07:17,468
WE'VE GOT TO GET
TO MacMEATIE'S!
132
00:07:17,537 --> 00:07:18,737
I KNOW WHERE
THERE'S AN ALIEN
133
00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:19,938
AND HE'S GOING
THROUGH THE MOLT
RIGHT NOW!
134
00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:21,305
IT'S OUR CHANCE TO
PROVE THAT THERE'S--
135
00:07:21,374 --> 00:07:22,774
SHH! WE'RE HERE.
136
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:35,754
A CROP CIRCLE?
137
00:07:35,823 --> 00:07:37,556
BEAUTIFUL, ISN'T IT?
138
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:38,857
IT'S A MESSAGE
FROM CREATURES
139
00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:40,158
MUCH MORE
INTELLIGENT THAN US.
140
00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:42,360
SPACE BEINGS WHO HAVE
TRAVELED MILLIONS
OF LIGHT YEARS
141
00:07:42,429 --> 00:07:43,895
TO SAY SOMETHING.
142
00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:46,164
BUT WHAT
DOES IT MEAN?
143
00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:48,299
I...THINK THIS ONE'S
A FAKE.
144
00:07:48,368 --> 00:07:51,135
YOU'RE ONE OF THOSE
SKEPTICS, AREN'T YOU?
145
00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:53,972
ALWAYS QUESTIONING.
ALWAYS PICKING AWAY
AT MY THEORIES!
146
00:07:54,041 --> 00:07:55,874
ONE DAY,
YOU'LL SEE THAT...
147
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:59,910
[MOOING AND BELL RINGING]
148
00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:06,484
NOW CAN WE GO
TO MacMEATIE'S,
PLEASE?
149
00:08:17,197 --> 00:08:20,297
NEED PORK, DADDY!
150
00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:21,733
ECCCHH!
151
00:08:21,802 --> 00:08:24,235
COME ON.
WE'RE IN
A HURRY HERE!
152
00:08:24,303 --> 00:08:26,270
WE HAVE TO MAKE IT
TO THE OBSERVATORY
BY 5
153
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:27,972
SO WE CAN WATCH
THE EQUINOX!
154
00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:30,642
THE EQUINOX
IS TONIGHT?!
155
00:08:30,710 --> 00:08:32,711
YUH-HUH.
156
00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:35,146
YUH-HUH, EH-HEH,
MM-HMM,
157
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:37,148
UH-HUH, MM-HMM.
YUH-HUH.
158
00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,020
NO! THE MOLT!
159
00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:44,622
I HAVE TO GO HOME.
160
00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:47,893
IF YOU TAKE OFF,
IT'LL BE IN YOUR
FILE FOREVER
161
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:50,227
AND YOU'LL NEVER
GET PROMOTED.
162
00:08:50,296 --> 00:08:52,897
I'VE COME TOO FAR
TO GIVE UP NOW.
163
00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,665
I MUST NOT UPSET MacMEATIE.
164
00:08:54,734 --> 00:08:56,300
SO CLOSE TO PROMOTION,
165
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:58,670
BUT I NEED TO TAKE
A BREAK AT 5 O'CLOCK.
166
00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:01,339
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO TALK TO THE SHIFT
CAPTAIN ABOUT THAT.
167
00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:09,480
IT'S 4:45.
IF WE HURRY,
WE CAN MAKE IT!
168
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:13,184
HMM. THE ALIENS MUST
BE CONTROLLING THE COW.
169
00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:16,721
THAT IS NOT
A SUPERNATURAL COW!
170
00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:18,022
THIS IS RIDICULOUS!
171
00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:19,390
YOU BELIEVE IN ALL
THE STUPIDEST THINGS
172
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,759
WHEN REAL PROOF IS
RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOSE!
173
00:09:23,263 --> 00:09:25,063
I BET YOU'D LISTEN TO ME
IF I WERE TALKING ABOUT...
174
00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:27,465
OH, I DON'T KNOW...
COUNT COCOFANG.
175
00:09:27,533 --> 00:09:29,901
WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ABOUT COUNT COCOFANG?!
176
00:09:29,970 --> 00:09:34,872
THAT HE'S GOING
TO BE AT MacMEATIE'S
AT 5 O'CLOCK.
177
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,442
WE HAVEN'T GOT
MUCH TIME.
LET'S ROLL.
178
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:42,313
I'VE BEEN FOLLOWING
THE COCOFANG CASE
FOR YEARS.
179
00:09:42,381 --> 00:09:43,848
EVERYBODY THINKS
HE'S MADE UP,
BUT HE'S NOT.
180
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:45,750
ONCE I CATCH HIM,
THE WORLD WILL KNOW
181
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,252
WHAT I'VE KNOWN
ALL ALONG.
182
00:09:47,321 --> 00:09:49,287
COUNT COCOFANG IS
AN ACTUAL VAMPIRE.
183
00:09:49,356 --> 00:09:52,891
JUST AS FRANKENCHOKEY
IS AN ACTUAL--
FRANKEN--THING.
184
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,226
WE'RE ALMOST THERE!
185
00:09:55,294 --> 00:09:58,296
THAT'S IT, ZIM,
YOUR ALIEN INFILTRATION
STOPS HERE!
186
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,334
Kids: YAY!
187
00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:05,603
OH, NO!
188
00:10:05,672 --> 00:10:08,973
BLUH! EAT COCOSPLODEES.
189
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:15,480
YEAH! COCOFANG ROCKS!
190
00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:17,948
THERE HE IS!
191
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:21,619
HE'S NOT A VAMPIRE!
192
00:10:21,688 --> 00:10:23,421
WE HAVE TO CATCH
THE ALIEN!
193
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:30,261
HEY! NO CUTTING!
194
00:10:30,329 --> 00:10:32,830
WE FINALLY MEET,
COUNT COCOFANG.
195
00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:37,101
THE LINE STARTS
BACK THERE. BLUH!
196
00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:40,605
IT'S JUST A GUY
IN A VAMPIRE SUIT.
197
00:10:42,375 --> 00:10:44,275
COME ON, FANG.
LET'S DANCE.
198
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:51,516
HEY, SOME GUYS ARE
CHASING AFTER COCOFANG!
199
00:10:57,757 --> 00:10:58,890
HAAH!
200
00:11:15,141 --> 00:11:16,274
[PEOPLE SCREAMING]
201
00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:27,752
NO! HELP! STOP!
WAIT UP!
202
00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:34,225
I'LL GET YOU, FANG!
203
00:11:35,594 --> 00:11:37,728
NOOOOO!
204
00:11:42,969 --> 00:11:45,970
[OUT OF BREATH]
I KNOW, LITTLE MAN.
205
00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,505
I FEEL YOUR PAIN.
206
00:11:47,574 --> 00:11:49,941
BUT ONE DAY,
WE'LL CATCH HIM.
207
00:11:50,010 --> 00:11:52,910
ONE DAY,
WE'LL CATCH...
THE FANG.
208
00:11:52,979 --> 00:11:54,712
YOU JERK.
209
00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:00,351
YOU'RE FIRED!
15842
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