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1
00:00:01,543 --> 00:00:03,625
RICK: Anyway, that's how
I escaped from space prison!
2
00:00:03,754 --> 00:00:04,994
Oh!
Scary place.
3
00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:07,918
Wow, Rick! That's -- That's
one -- one heck of a story.
4
00:00:08,050 --> 00:00:10,007
I sure do wish I could've
been there to see it happen.
5
00:00:10,135 --> 00:00:12,046
Oh, come on. Who wants to watch
a mad scientist
6
00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:13,214
use handmade sci-fi tools
7
00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,008
to take out highly trained
alien guards
8
00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:17,347
when we can sit here
and be a family at Shoney's?
9
00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:19,968
Dad, it's great to have you
back, no matter where we are.
10
00:00:20,103 --> 00:00:21,343
But wouldn't you like
to go home?
11
00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,596
Emotionally speaking, honey,
Shoney's is my home.
12
00:00:23,732 --> 00:00:25,222
Yeah, but you just got out
of prison.
13
00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:27,646
I mean, how much of a step up
from that is --
14
00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:29,394
Jerry, get out of the booth,
take all your clothes off,
15
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,988
-and fold yourself 12 times.
-You got it.
16
00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:34,277
[Grunting]
17
00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:38,406
Six folds, huh?
18
00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,780
W-What, have you guys got me
in a Series 9000?
19
00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,782
You cheap insect fucks
didn't think I was worth
20
00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:43,783
your best equipment?
21
00:00:43,919 --> 00:00:46,581
[Chuckles]
Man, I told the money bugs.
22
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,624
I said, "You know
who this guy is, right?
23
00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:50,794
You want me to get intel
out of the smartest mammal
24
00:00:50,926 --> 00:00:53,509
in the galaxy, you'd better
give me a decent brainalyzer."
25
00:00:53,637 --> 00:00:55,253
Well, you might as well order
some pancakes,
26
00:00:55,389 --> 00:00:57,255
because I don't see the need
to leave this part of my brain.
27
00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:58,847
Oh, I think you do.
28
00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:01,013
Eventually, you're either gonna
relax your cerebellum...
29
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:01,849
Shoney's.
30
00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:04,266
...or the Series 9000
is going to turn it into mush.
31
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,435
-[Farts]
-Relaxed enough? [Chuckles]
32
00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:07,932
-I admire you, Rick.
-[Farts]
33
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:08,933
[Laughing]
34
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,605
-When I --
-[Farts]
35
00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:12,193
-Rick, here's --
-[Farts]
36
00:01:13,907 --> 00:01:15,523
[Machinery humming]
37
00:01:15,659 --> 00:01:17,241
-What's going on?
-It's hard to tell.
38
00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,985
He may have manifested
some sort of butt.
39
00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:19,986
He can do that?
40
00:01:20,122 --> 00:01:22,830
He is the smartest man
in the universe.
41
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,241
[Dramatic music plays]
42
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:57,489
[Whirring]
43
00:01:57,618 --> 00:01:59,575
[Sighs]
44
00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:02,195
I tell you, the Galactic
Federation taking over Earth --
45
00:02:02,331 --> 00:02:04,197
best thing that's ever happened
to this family.
46
00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:05,915
I just got my sixth promotion
this week,
47
00:02:06,043 --> 00:02:07,374
and I still don't know
what I do.
48
00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:08,958
Who cares
how high they promote you?
49
00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:10,703
Everyone just gets paid
in pills.
50
00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:12,671
Well, when you're not sure
what you do for a living,
51
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,130
you can make your own rules.
52
00:02:14,259 --> 00:02:16,216
Summer, show your father
some respect.
53
00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,632
He's pulling down
a six-chewable-figure income.
54
00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:20,755
-[Glass shatters]
-I'll get that in a moment.
55
00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:21,881
How are everyone's pills?
56
00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:23,803
Oh, Morty, you've hardly touched
your pills.
57
00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,801
I kind of had big pills
for lunch, and I...
58
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,723
wasn't gonna eat any more pills.
59
00:02:27,856 --> 00:02:28,561
[Gulps]
60
00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:30,146
Thank you, Conroy.
61
00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:31,731
You spoil us, Conroy.
62
00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:33,442
Grandpa Rick wouldn't put up
with this!
63
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:36,062
Stop saying his name.
He abandoned us.
64
00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:37,359
Willem Dafoe!
65
00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:39,823
T-That's the guy I couldn't
think of this morning.
66
00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:41,112
Don't make my mistake, Summer.
67
00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:42,985
Don't deify the people
that leave you.
68
00:02:43,121 --> 00:02:46,239
You'll end up a horse surgeon
in a world controlled by aliens
69
00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:49,584
whose medicine keeps horses...
healthy forever.
70
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:50,496
[Sniffles]
71
00:02:50,629 --> 00:02:52,040
Horses live longer
than tortoises now!
72
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,207
Is that what you want
for yourself?
73
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:56,082
Maybe I just want you to care
if I run away yelling!
74
00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:58,050
Who saved room for pill brûrlée?
75
00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,509
Ooh!
[Chuckles]
76
00:02:59,638 --> 00:03:01,845
I can see why you chose
this family-friendly restaurant
77
00:03:01,973 --> 00:03:03,338
to represent your cerebellum.
78
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:06,593
So safe, so comfortable,
so Shoney's.
79
00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:09,846
But admit it, Rick -- You're
going crazy cooped up in here.
80
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:12,313
-Let's go visit some memories.
-Oh, any particular ones?
81
00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:13,603
You want to see my first boner
82
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,100
or should we go
straight to the moment
83
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:17,524
I discovered
interdimensional travel?
84
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:19,772
Ooh. Your little flappy doodles
are twitching.
85
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:21,615
Does that mean you're aroused,
or did you just get a signal
86
00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,108
that one of your buddies found
a grape?
87
00:03:23,245 --> 00:03:24,360
It's arousal.
88
00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,453
Yes, I'd like very much
to visit the memory
89
00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:27,787
of you inventing
your portal gun.
90
00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,203
-Yeah. Well, tough titties.
-[Rumbling, glass breaking]
91
00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:33,202
There's no tougher titty
than a psychotic break, Rick.
92
00:03:33,338 --> 00:03:37,252
Well, that depends on who breaks
first -- me or the titty.
93
00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:41,298
Someone special you remember?
94
00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:42,966
Is that your memory of her
out there --
95
00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,384
between where you were on 9/11
96
00:03:44,516 --> 00:03:45,881
and your favorite
sports blooper?
97
00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:48,133
[Whooshing]
98
00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:51,683
If we stay here, you'll die,
along with all your memories.
99
00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,102
If you take me
where I want to go,
100
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,520
she'll be there, too, won't she?
101
00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:58,815
The day I invented the portal
gun is the day I lost her.
102
00:03:58,947 --> 00:03:59,812
Oh, that sounds cool.
103
00:03:59,948 --> 00:04:02,110
I can get what I want
and you can say goodbye.
104
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,950
[Sighs]
Fine, but I'm driving.
105
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,785
...as an excuse
to strip away our freedom.
106
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,654
[Down-tempo music plays]
107
00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:11,782
Huh? What are you --
What are you doing?
108
00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:14,376
Grandpa Rick must have
some secret lab, right?
109
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,246
With, like, laser guns
and jets packs and a space tank!
110
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,793
And we can go
break him out of prison!
111
00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:19,960
Look at these dead flies!
112
00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,504
Maybe if we arrange them
in a certain order,
113
00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:23,252
it plays a hologram
or it opens a secret door.
114
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,095
Summer, you're freaking me out!
115
00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:27,214
I know things have changed
a lot, and I know you miss Rick,
116
00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,341
but getting him back
wouldn't make things better.
117
00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:30,968
And, you know,
we're not doing so bad.
118
00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:32,344
We're miserable, Morty!
119
00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:35,724
There's a mandatory curfew,
their weird calendar made me 47,
120
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,645
and they weaponized
the Eiffel Tower!
121
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:40,190
I like being 35.
H can rent a car now.
122
00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:41,278
Because you suck!
123
00:04:41,406 --> 00:04:42,862
You've been keeping
your lip zipped about it
124
00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:44,777
since Grandpa got arrested,
but the fact is,
125
00:04:44,910 --> 00:04:46,651
you're freaking stoked
to bail on him.
126
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,027
He bails on everybody!
127
00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:49,653
He bailed on Mom
when she was a kid!
128
00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,372
He - He bailed on tiny planet!
129
00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,161
And in case I never made this
clear to you, Summer,
130
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,328
he bailed on you.
131
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,247
He left you to rot
in a world that he ruined
132
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:57,289
because he doesn't care!
133
00:04:57,422 --> 00:04:59,914
Because nobody's special to him,
Summer, not even himself.
134
00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:02,758
So if you really want your
grandpa back, grab a shovel.
135
00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:05,594
The one that won't let you down
is buried in your backyard!
136
00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:06,678
You're right!
137
00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:08,172
What?!
No! I'm not right!
138
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,390
H was using ghoulish overkill!
139
00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:11,884
Ghoulish overkill, Summer!
140
00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:13,351
SUMMER:
[Grunting]
141
00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:14,686
[Thunder crashing]
142
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:17,523
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
143
00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:18,561
Whoa, whoa!
144
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,612
-Where are we going?
-To the day it all began --
145
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:24,605
and ended.
146
00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,573
The moment that changed
everything.
147
00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:30,236
MAN: Welcome to McDonald's.
Can I take your order?
148
00:05:30,372 --> 00:05:31,862
Yeah, I'd like to get
a 10-piece McNugget
149
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,864
and, uh, a bunch
of the Szechuan sauce.
150
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,536
Like. as much as you're allowed
to give me.
151
00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:38,536
In 1998, they had this promotion
for the Disney film "Mulan,"
152
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:39,753
where they - where they -
153
00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:41,588
they created a new sauce
for the McNuggets
154
00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:44,083
called Szechuan sauce,
and it's delicious!
155
00:05:44,219 --> 00:05:46,005
And then they got rid of it,
and now it's gone.
156
00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:48,094
The only place we're gonna be
able to try it is in my memory.
157
00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:50,055
Rick, you're doing this bit
while your brain is melting.
158
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:51,548
Okay.
All right, all right.
159
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:54,393
[Down-tempo music plays]
160
00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,386
161
00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:56,762
162
00:05:56,898 --> 00:05:58,354
I used to wear blue pants.
163
00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:00,815
[Whirring, zapping]
164
00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:05,813
When'd you make the leap
to interdimensional travel?
165
00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:08,031
I didn't.
I did.
166
00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:11,151
Well, well, well.
If it isn't us.
167
00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:13,325
You know the worst part
about inventing teleportation?
168
00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:14,992
Suddenly you're able to travel
the whole galaxy,
169
00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:16,240
and the first thing you learn is
170
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,242
you're the last guy
to invent teleportation.
171
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:20,335
Fortunately,
you're about to invent something
172
00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:21,578
much more powerful.
173
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:22,830
[Squeals]
174
00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:24,297
What?
175
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:26,008
[Whirring]
176
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,298
[Thunder crashes]
177
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:30,797
[Music continues]
178
00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:33,014
Summer, nobody has to know
about that.
179
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,180
We could put it right back
and pretend we never saw it,
180
00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:36,598
like we did
with Dad's mannequin leg.
181
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:39,142
Fine. Stay here.
I'll rescue Grandpa myself.
182
00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:40,890
-How are you gonna do that?!
-I don't know yet.
183
00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:43,484
I'll make it up as I go.
That's what Grandpa Rick does.
184
00:06:43,612 --> 00:06:44,943
That's what heroes do.
185
00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:46,402
You want to see
what a hero Rick is?
186
00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:48,613
I-I'll bring you somewhere,
Summer!
187
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:51,109
-Um...
-My goodness, children.
188
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,109
[Whirring]
189
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,781
[Sternly] Relinquish
the illegal technology
190
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:55,746
to the nearest
Federation representative.
191
00:06:55,874 --> 00:06:58,992
[Normal voice] And then
we'll all play Balderdash.
192
00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:01,334
[Both whimper, scream]
193
00:07:03,965 --> 00:07:05,706
[Screaming]
194
00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:08,174
[Metal creaking]
195
00:07:08,303 --> 00:07:10,385
[Farting]
196
00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:12,675
[Dramatic music plays]
197
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,466
[Grunts]
Oh, my goodness!
198
00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,388
Oh! Oh!
My goo--
199
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,386
[Electricity crackling]
200
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:22,226
Oh, my God.
201
00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:24,600
I have that exact same top.
202
00:07:24,736 --> 00:07:26,101
What is this place?
203
00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:27,944
And what's with
"Hunger Games" Summer?
204
00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:31,862
That's my sister.
This used to be my home.
205
00:07:31,993 --> 00:07:33,575
Imagine doing anything you want,
206
00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:35,740
then hopping to a timeline
where you never did it.
207
00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:38,660
Imagine going anywhere, anytime,
with nobody able to stop you.
208
00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,624
-Sounds lonely.
-Lonely?
209
00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,335
Dude, you have yourself --
your infinite selves.
210
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:44,373
It's a nonstop party
211
00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,497
where all the guests
are the only person we like.
212
00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,215
You think it's cool
being the smartest man on Earth,
213
00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:49,674
but once we give you
this technology,
214
00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:52,795
you become the smartest thing
in every conceivable universe --
215
00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:55,218
the Infinite Rick, a god.
216
00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:56,306
Enh, pass.
217
00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:59,301
Excuse me?
Bro, Ricks don't pass on this.
218
00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:00,643
Who do you think you are?
219
00:08:00,772 --> 00:08:02,809
A different kind of Rick,
I guess.
220
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,648
Well, we'll see how long
that lasts.
221
00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:07,143
[Whirring]
222
00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:10,737
I heard sci-fi noises.
Did you make a breakthrough?
223
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:11,980
Sort of.
224
00:08:12,117 --> 00:08:13,573
I just took a long
look at myself,
225
00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:16,569
and I don't think this
science thing is gonna pay off.
226
00:08:16,705 --> 00:08:19,868
Well, why don't I get Beth
and we'll go out for ice cream?
227
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,037
That, Diane,
is the last great idea
228
00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:24,375
that will ever be had
in this garage.
229
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:27,292
[Loud chewing, grunting]
230
00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:30,132
Good roasted Cronenberg,
I assume.
231
00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,586
Mom, you're looking...feral.
232
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:36,213
I can't believe Rick did this.
233
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,714
These are the parts
of Rick's adventures
234
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:40,263
you don't get to see --
the parts he leaves behind.
235
00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:41,851
All right.
It's been great, guys.
236
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:43,721
Um, I really
only wanted to stop by here
237
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,268
for a quick "I told you so."
238
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,482
60, uh...
-Looking for this?
239
00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:49,977
-What are you doing with that?!
-It stinks of Rick.
240
00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:52,070
-[Grunts]
-No! Why?!
241
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,063
Why would you do that?!
242
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:55,065
W-What is the matter
with you people?!
243
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:57,238
You're a bunch
of back savages --
244
00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,236
backwood savage morons!
245
00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:02,660
You can never leave.
She cannot remain.
246
00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,624
She stinks of Rick.
247
00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:06,289
-Aah!
-Aah!
248
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:07,661
[Grunts]
249
00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:10,334
Hold your fire! Hold your fire!
I'm Morty C-137.
250
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:13,501
We detected a compromised
portal gun.
251
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,047
-Where is your Rick?
-He's in prison.
252
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:15,794
Summer.
253
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:17,341
He got captured
by the Federation,
254
00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:18,760
and we were going to rescue him.
255
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:19,802
Very troubling.
256
00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:21,174
We can't risk Citadel secrets
257
00:09:21,311 --> 00:09:22,722
falling into
the Federation's hands.
258
00:09:22,854 --> 00:09:24,561
We'll dispatch
S.E.A.L. Team Ricks immediately
259
00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:26,646
to break into the prison
holding C-137...
260
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:27,606
Boo-yam.
261
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,099
...and assassinate him.
262
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:31,272
Boo-nah?
263
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:32,565
-[Horn honks]
-Come on, girls!
264
00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:34,779
The ice cream's gonna melt!
265
00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,694
[Chewing loudly]
266
00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:39,158
[Whirring]
267
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:42,200
[Beeping rapidly]
268
00:09:42,332 --> 00:09:44,915
[Dramatic music plays]
269
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:49,002
No-o-o-o-o-o-o!
270
00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:51,918
Wow.
This sauce is fucking amazing.
271
00:09:52,050 --> 00:09:53,381
You said it was promoting
a movie?
272
00:09:53,510 --> 00:09:55,000
[Slurping]
273
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:57,506
[Down-tempo music plays]
274
00:09:57,639 --> 00:10:00,131
Carry the 3, add a 2.
275
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,301
I got it.
276
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,970
I fucking got it!
277
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,470
Whoa.
I-Is that it - the portal gun?
278
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:06,310
Yeah.
279
00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,931
That's the three lines of math
that separates my life as a man
280
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,933
from my life
as an unfeeling ghost.
281
00:10:11,069 --> 00:10:12,150
Awesome possum.
282
00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:13,643
[Whirring]
283
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:15,066
Mission Control,
you getting this?
284
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:16,438
Holy shit, yes!
285
00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:17,905
W Yes!
e got it!
286
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:18,899
-Yeah! All right!
-Thanks, Rick.
287
00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:20,821
I'll try to remember
to shut off the brainalyzer.
288
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:23,195
Actually, I think it shuts off
automatically
289
00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:24,412
once your brain is liquid.
290
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,747
Don't know, don't care.
291
00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,786
Pull me out.
292
00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:29,501
Hey, pull me out.
Can you hear me?
293
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,085
Nope, they cannot.
294
00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,796
-Why not?
-Because the code you uploaded
295
00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:34,540
wasn't actually
my portal-gun formula.
296
00:10:34,676 --> 00:10:37,259
It was a virus giving me full
control over the brainalyzer.
297
00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:38,877
What are you talking about?
This is a memory.
298
00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:40,845
Y-You can't alter details
of a memory.
299
00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:43,056
True, but you can alter
anything you want
300
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,767
about a totally fabricated
origin story.
301
00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:48,269
It's a trap! Abort!
I'm still in his Shoney's!
302
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:50,264
Repeat --
We never left his Shoney's!
303
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:52,357
Mission accomplished, boys.
Pull me out.
304
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,520
Roger that.
305
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:54,984
Have fun in what's left
of my brain.
306
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:56,103
I'm gonna transfer to yours.
307
00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:58,401
Oh, there's not enough room
for all my genius,
308
00:10:58,533 --> 00:11:00,444
so I'm leaving you with my fear
of wicker furniture,
309
00:11:00,577 --> 00:11:01,908
my desire to play the trumpet,
310
00:11:02,036 --> 00:11:03,447
my tentative plans
to purchase a hat,
311
00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:05,036
and six years
of improv workshops.
312
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:06,781
-Comedy comes in threes.
-It's a trap!
313
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,907
-Abort! We never left his -
-[Farts]
314
00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:10,124
[Laughs]
315
00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:12,119
No!
316
00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:14,713
[Machinery humming]
317
00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:16,252
RICK:
Another day, another dollar.
318
00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,000
Am I a great insect creature
or what?!
319
00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:19,217
Congratulations, Agent.
320
00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:20,585
You'll be highly commended
for this.
321
00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:22,133
Always wait for permission
to [burps]
322
00:11:22,265 --> 00:11:23,596
Feel accomplishment --
That's my motto.
323
00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:25,181
One thing still perplexes me --
324
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:27,017
Why would Rick Sanchez
turn himself in?
325
00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:29,603
Well, I'm just a dumb-ass bug,
but it's possible Rick knew
326
00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,142
he'd be interrogated
at this facility,
327
00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:32,764
where we not only keep
our most wanted,
328
00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:34,016
but our most sensitive data.
329
00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:36,189
Anyone here with level-9
access could [burps]
330
00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:37,982
I don't know.
Collapse the government.
331
00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:39,400
I'm just gonna go take a dump.
332
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,273
Is it cool if I use
the level-9 bathrooms?
333
00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:43,821
W-What's the level-9
master access code again?
334
00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,819
Oh, that's easy -
5.3 _
335
00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:47,491
Oh, yeah!
336
00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:49,080
S.E.A.L. Team Ricks
in the house!
337
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,325
[Screaming]
338
00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:52,667
Hi, Rick.
339
00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:53,751
Bye, Rick.
340
00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,542
[Dramatic music plays]
341
00:11:58,426 --> 00:11:59,882
D-99, y-you okay?
342
00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:01,752
[Grunting]
343
00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:04,505
I'm bummed I didn't get to give
that insect dick a test drive.
344
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:06,257
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
T-The Council of Ricks sent us.
345
00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:07,598
We have your Morty and Summer.
346
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,058
They're prisoners
on the Citadel.
347
00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,143
-Great.
-[Grunts]
348
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:12,683
-Security breach in room 6755.
-[Alarm blaring]
349
00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:13,520
Lovely.
350
00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:16,483
Not only is my plan screwed up,
I also forgot how to improvise.
351
00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,522
-All security people approach.
-[Grunts]
352
00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:20,692
Security breach.
353
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:24,032
[Down-tempo music plays]
354
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:26,785
[Whirring]
355
00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,449
A city of Grandpas?
356
00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:29,946
MORTY:
It's the Citadel of Ricks.
357
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,074
All the different Ricks
from all the different realities
358
00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:33,792
got together to hide here
from the government.
359
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,627
But if every Rick hates
the government,
360
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:36,870
why would they hate Grandpa?
361
00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:38,872
Because Ricks hate themselves
the most.
362
00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,500
And our Rick is the most...
himself.
363
00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:42,671
Not anymore, homey.
364
00:12:42,804 --> 00:12:44,386
S.E.A.L. Team Ricks
turned his unibrow
365
00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:46,505
into two brows -- with a bullet.
366
00:12:46,641 --> 00:12:47,506
[Laughter]
367
00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:50,805
Your Rick's dead!
Your Rick's dead!
368
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:52,974
[Dramatic music plays]
369
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:56,519
Sir, Rick D-99 is returning
from the mission alone.
370
00:12:56,651 --> 00:12:59,143
Apparently, S.E.A.L. Team Ricks
suffered heavy casualties.
371
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,144
Bring him in.
372
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,489
He says he'll only talk
to a Rick with higher clearance.
373
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,527
La-di-da.
Give me that.
374
00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:08,994
D-99, this is the commander in
chief of the Citadel's militia.
375
00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,283
Go-- [Burps]
Good enough.
376
00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:12,622
[Whirring]
377
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:15,583
He's a spy. Blow him up.
I'm gonna go take a shit.
378
00:13:15,712 --> 00:13:17,703
Operating an unregistered
portal gun,
379
00:13:17,839 --> 00:13:19,375
radicalizing a Summer,
380
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,089
conspiring
with a traitorous Rick.
381
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,082
How do you plead?
382
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,549
How is this a fair trial?
383
00:13:23,678 --> 00:13:25,168
O-Our lawyer is a Morty!
384
00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:27,512
It's not fair, you have no
rights, and he's not a lawyer.
385
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,222
We just keep him here
because he's fun.
386
00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:30,465
Look at him go.
[Laughs]
387
00:13:30,601 --> 00:13:31,716
[Laughs]
Yeah!
388
00:13:31,853 --> 00:13:34,185
We'll be lenient
if you renounce your Rick.
389
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:35,679
What say you, Summer?
390
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,603
I say fuck you!
My grandpa was my hero.
391
00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,351
You killed him
because you were jealous of him.
392
00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:42,102
That's pretty obvious
from the haircuts.
393
00:13:42,238 --> 00:13:44,400
So do what you want to me,
but let my brother go.
394
00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:45,943
He already renounced Rick.
395
00:13:46,075 --> 00:13:46,689
M o Morty??
396
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,567
-[Whispers indistinctly]
-What?
397
00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:51,161
N-No, I don't want to see
your pog collection.
398
00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:53,530
I don't renounce Rick,
and I never have.
399
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:56,033
I was just trying to protect
my sister.
400
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:57,705
I wanted you to have
a normal life.
401
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,669
That's something you can't have
when Rick shows up.
402
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:02,459
Everything real turns fake.
Everything right is wrong.
403
00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:04,879
All you know is that you know
nothing and he knows everything.
404
00:14:05,011 --> 00:14:07,969
And, well -- well, he's not
a villain, Summer,
405
00:14:08,097 --> 00:14:09,758
but he shouldn't be your hero.
406
00:14:09,891 --> 00:14:13,100
He's more like a demon
or a super fucked-up god.
407
00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:15,218
Let's not suck the ghost
of his dick too hard.
408
00:14:15,355 --> 00:14:17,221
He was a terrorist,
and now he's dead.
409
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,098
Oh, yeah? If you think
my Rick's dead, he's alive!
410
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:20,940
And if you think you're safe,
he's coming for you!
411
00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:22,776
[All murmuring]
412
00:14:22,904 --> 00:14:25,771
[Whirring]
413
00:14:25,907 --> 00:14:27,022
[Whistling]
414
00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,899
Hey! Whoa, whoa!
What are you doing in here?
415
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,322
This area is for teleporting
the entire Citadel
416
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:33,912
to somewhere else
using only buttons and dials.
417
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,576
Yeah?
Well, it's a bad idea
418
00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:38,496
to have it designed that way
then, isn't it?
419
00:14:38,628 --> 00:14:41,290
[Whirring]
420
00:14:43,132 --> 00:14:44,463
[Dramatic music plays]
421
00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:45,582
-[Screaming]
-What the fuck?
422
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,085
We just teleported into
a Galactic federal prison!
423
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:50,633
-I'm gonna go take a shit.
-[Alarm blaring]
424
00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:52,506
Order in the court!
Whoa! What the hell?!
425
00:14:52,642 --> 00:14:53,507
Oh, my God!
426
00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:55,509
[Screaming]
427
00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:57,386
Aah!
428
00:14:57,522 --> 00:14:58,933
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
No, no, no!
429
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:01,853
[Indistinct shouting]
430
00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:03,975
Whoa!
[Screaming]
431
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:05,860
Whoa!
432
00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:08,525
[Music continues]
433
00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:17,246
The Citadel has been teleported
to [burps] Federation space.
434
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,958
It's doomed.
This has to be 0-137, you guys.
435
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,417
-What are we gonna do?!
-You know he's coming for us.
436
00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:23,662
All right! Calm down!
We have his Summer as a hostage.
437
00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:24,913
Obviously, I get her.
438
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:27,336
You guys play Rick, Laser,
Scissors for the Morty.
439
00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:30,297
W-What the hell is that?
440
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,387
Payback.
441
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:34,472
[Screaming]
442
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:35,965
Grandpa Rick!
443
00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:37,718
-Duh.
-You're alive!
444
00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:38,935
-Rick!
-Morty, take this.
445
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,304
You're gonna need it later.
446
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,557
[Music continues]
447
00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:46,192
Hold on. Hold on.
Whoa!
448
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,061
COUNCIL MEMBER:
That's enough, Rick.
449
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:49,813
What -- What's this
supposed to accomplish?
450
00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,064
We have infinite grandkids.
451
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,658
You're trying to use Disney
bucks at a Caesars Palace here.
452
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,118
[Gasps] That's a bluff.
He's bluffing, sir. He loves me.
453
00:15:56,247 --> 00:15:58,784
You're a rogue Rick --
irrational, passionate.
454
00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:01,533
You love your grandkids.
You came to rescue them.
455
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,455
I came to kill you, bro.
456
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:04,999
That's not even
my original Summer.
457
00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:06,713
Oh, my God. He's not bluffing.
He's not bluffing!
458
00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,673
-R-Rick?
-Why not shoot through her?
459
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,917
Twenty yards,
nine-gauge plasma pistol.
460
00:16:11,053 --> 00:16:13,465
My first shot would liquify
her insides and injure you,
461
00:16:13,598 --> 00:16:14,759
second shot adds recoil.
462
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:17,178
The risk to me is minimized
if I wait for you to shoot her,
463
00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,596
which I'm encouraging you to do.
464
00:16:18,728 --> 00:16:20,184
-What the fuck?!
-Or let her go,
465
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:21,849
which I will reward
with a quicker death.
466
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,062
Because you love her!
467
00:16:23,191 --> 00:16:26,309
Because it's incentive for you
to give me my cleanest shot,
468
00:16:26,444 --> 00:16:28,105
which will be
your least painful death.
469
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:30,729
But if you want to die slower
than that, I'm super into it.
470
00:16:30,865 --> 00:16:32,355
All you got to do to get
that started is kill the girl.
471
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,779
-I hate you!
-Not an issue, sweetie.
472
00:16:34,911 --> 00:16:36,822
That's enough!
Drop the gun, Rick!
473
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,570
Morty, I know you're too stupid
to get this,
474
00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,196
but you're really
fucking this up right now.
475
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,869
I'm not letting you let
my sister die!
476
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:42,866
Drop the gun!
477
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:44,788
I wasn't gonna let her die,
you fucking moron!
478
00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:45,831
479
00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:47,704
The point is he thought
I was going to.
480
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,502
I totally did, by the way.
You're a fucking moron, Morty.
481
00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:51,875
Morty, you fucking idiot!
482
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:53,718
RICK: You're a serious
fucking idiot, Morty!
483
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:54,836
You basically killed us all!
484
00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:56,633
-You're the worst!
-You're dumb as a bag of sand!
485
00:16:56,766 --> 00:17:00,225
[Indistinct shouting]
486
00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:02,560
[Screaming]
487
00:17:02,688 --> 00:17:04,224
Who's stupid now, bitch?!
488
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,018
Morty!
We just got him back!
489
00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:08,608
[Laughs]
That was amazing, Morty.
490
00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:10,101
Oh, my God.
491
00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:11,820
Okay.
Let's wrap this -
492
00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:14,906
Good job, Morty.
Let's go, kids.
493
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,274
What?!
What happened?
494
00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:17,900
Oldest Rick trick in the book.
495
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,948
"Fake gun.
Shoot me in standoff."
496
00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:21,537
-Brilliant!
-Ha! Yeah.
497
00:17:21,666 --> 00:17:23,998
G-Good thing I saw that note.
498
00:17:24,126 --> 00:17:27,619
[Dramatic music plays]
499
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:30,247
[Screaming]
500
00:17:30,383 --> 00:17:31,873
Couldn't we just portal home?
501
00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:33,374
Not until I finish
what I started.
502
00:17:33,511 --> 00:17:34,467
[Grunts]
503
00:17:34,595 --> 00:17:37,678
And that is how you get level-9
access without a password.
504
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:39,631
Freeze!
505
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:41,849
Employee of the month,
ladies and gentlemen.
506
00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:44,015
So what are you doing
with level-9 access anyways?
507
00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,807
Destroying the [burps]
Galactic government.
508
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:46,930
-Awesome!
-Whoa! Cool!
509
00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:48,977
Are you going to set all their
nukes to target each other?
510
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:50,726
Ooh, or -- or reprogram
their military portals
511
00:17:50,861 --> 00:17:52,317
to disintegrate
their entire space fleet?
512
00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:54,357
Good pitches, kids.
I'm almost proud.
513
00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:56,652
But watch closely
as Grandpa topples an empire
514
00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:59,867
by changing a one...to a zero.
515
00:18:00,955 --> 00:18:02,946
[Pen scratching, door opens]
516
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:05,244
Mr. President, the Blemflarck's
value just dropped to nothing.
517
00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:06,491
What do you mean?
518
00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:08,743
I mean our single centralized
Galactic currency
519
00:18:08,879 --> 00:18:12,622
just went from being worth one
of itself to zero of itself.
520
00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:14,465
-Dear God, no.
-Calm down, people.
521
00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,585
Deploy the Galactic militia
and declare martial law.
522
00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:17,586
Yes, sir.
523
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:19,429
Uh, what should I pay them with?
524
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:22,515
Their payment is the honor
they'll feel to serve their --
525
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,634
Wait. Who's paying me
to yell at this guy?
526
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,057
I can answer that -- for money.
527
00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:28,554
I never thought I'd live
to see this day.
528
00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:29,897
Gentlemen!
Gentlemen!
529
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:32,484
There's a solution here
you're not seeing.
530
00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:37,526
-Give me your jacket!
-Give me those pants!
531
00:18:37,658 --> 00:18:39,865
[Indistinct shouting]
532
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:43,533
[Indistinct shouting]
533
00:18:43,664 --> 00:18:45,530
[Dramatic music plays]
534
00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:47,327
I want more jackets!
535
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,997
He who controls the pants
controls the galaxy!
536
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,871
[Whimpering]
537
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:56,375
[Gasps]
538
00:18:59,305 --> 00:19:01,387
[Whimpering]
539
00:19:04,226 --> 00:19:08,220
No longer will the insects
have domain over surface world!
540
00:19:08,356 --> 00:19:10,848
[Music continues]
541
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:16,235
[Whimpering]
542
00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:18,446
Jerry, what the hell
is happening?!
543
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,281
The Galactic government
collapsed.
544
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:21,740
-Are you okay?
-Look.
545
00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:23,325
I'm not proud to share this,
but the truth is,
546
00:19:23,454 --> 00:19:25,240
I just kept crawling,
and it kept working.
547
00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,205
-[Exhales deeply]
-Oh, I'm glad you're okay.
548
00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:31,076
Are we ever going to stop paying
for indulging your father?
549
00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:33,920
Our children, our planet,
our jobs.
550
00:19:34,048 --> 00:19:35,538
Is there anything left to lose?
551
00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:37,882
Just each other,
and I'll never let you go.
552
00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:41,002
And I'm so sorry
I ever did this to us.
553
00:19:41,597 --> 00:19:43,804
Guess who dismantled
the government.
554
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,924
-Please don't leave me again.
-I never will, baby.
555
00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:47,801
I was right!
He turned himself in on purpose!
556
00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:49,393
It was all part of his plan!
557
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:50,808
Jerry. is there any light bear
left?
558
00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:52,601
It's insane what you miss
in prison.
559
00:19:52,733 --> 00:19:54,474
Um, okay.
560
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,567
No, no, no.
Foot-down time.
561
00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:58,107
No. You're right.
Where's the vodka?
562
00:19:58,239 --> 00:20:00,776
Beth, it's him or me!
563
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:06,320
Seems like you guys need
some privacy.
564
00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:08,446
I'll, uh, I'll be in the garage.
565
00:20:11,502 --> 00:20:13,994
What the fuck?!
Not cool, Jerry!
566
00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:16,417
A man's garage is his castle.
567
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,041
[Whirring, beeping]
568
00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:28,426
Jerry's going to spend
some time...divorced.
569
00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:30,393
Oh. Oh, I-I'm sorry
to hear that, sweetie.
570
00:20:30,521 --> 00:20:32,103
I hope I had nothing
to do with that.
571
00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,598
Oh, God. Dad, that is not
your burden to bear.
572
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:37,442
I feel terrible
that I misjudged you.
573
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,152
This is gonna be good for Jerry.
574
00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,191
-For everybody.
-For everybody.
575
00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:44,406
-[Cellphone whooshes]
-I better tend to Jerry
576
00:20:44,535 --> 00:20:47,072
before he changes his mind
and doesn't move out.
577
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,161
I will leave you two
to your adventures.
578
00:20:49,290 --> 00:20:50,075
Oh, my God.
579
00:20:50,207 --> 00:20:52,369
Nancy says they're drawing
and quartering aliens
580
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:53,536
in the school courtyard,
581
00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:55,831
and it technically counts
as patriotism.
582
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:58,796
Geez! Are my parents seriously
gonna get divorced?
583
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,130
All right, Rick.
I'm gonna go to my -- Gah!
584
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,966
Not so fast, Morty.
You heard your mom.
585
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,631
We've got adventures to go on,
Morty, just you and me.
586
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,675
And sometimes your sister
and sometimes your mom,
587
00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:07,717
but never your dad.
588
00:21:07,850 --> 00:21:09,841
You want to know why, Morty?
Because he crossed me.
589
00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:11,684
Okay. Take it easy, Rick.
T-That's dark.
590
00:21:11,812 --> 00:21:12,973
Oh, it gets darker, Morty.
591
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:15,062
Welcome to the darkest year
of our adventures.
592
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:16,272
First thing that's different --
593
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:17,515
-no more Dad, Morty.
-Oh, geez.
594
00:21:17,651 --> 00:21:19,062
He threatened to turn me in
to the government,
595
00:21:19,195 --> 00:21:20,936
so I made him and the government
go away.
596
00:21:21,071 --> 00:21:21,856
Oh, fuck.
597
00:21:21,989 --> 00:21:24,822
I've rep[burps]laced them both
as the de facto patriarch
598
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,657
of your family
and your universe.
599
00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:27,821
Your mom wouldn't have
accepted me
600
00:21:27,953 --> 00:21:29,364
if I came home without you
and your sister,
601
00:21:29,497 --> 00:21:31,283
so now you know the real reason
I rescued you.
602
00:21:31,415 --> 00:21:32,701
I just took over the family,
MOW.
603
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:34,540
And if you tell your mom
or sister I said any of this,
604
00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:36,204
I'll deny it,
and they'll take my side
605
00:21:36,337 --> 00:21:37,293
because I'm a hero, Morty.
606
00:21:37,421 --> 00:21:39,503
Now you're gonna have to go
and do whatever I say, Morty,
607
00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:40,337
Forever!
608
00:21:40,466 --> 00:21:42,207
And I'll -- I'll go out
and I'll find some more of that
609
00:21:42,343 --> 00:21:45,085
"Mulan" Szechuan teriyaki
dipping sauce, Morty.
610
00:21:45,221 --> 00:21:46,427
-What are you talking about?
-Because that's --
611
00:21:46,555 --> 00:21:47,761
that's what this is all about.
Marty!
612
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:49,346
-Szechuan?
-That's my one-armed man!
613
00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:51,307
I'm not driven by avenging
my dead family, Morty!
614
00:21:51,435 --> 00:21:52,300
That was fake!
615
00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:54,393
I-I'm driven by finding
that McNugget sauce.
616
00:21:54,522 --> 00:21:56,138
I want that "Mulan"
McNugget sauce, Morty!
617
00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:57,855
-That's my series arc, Morty!
-What the hell?
618
00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:00,065
If it takes nine seasons, I want
my McNugget dipping sauce --
619
00:22:00,194 --> 00:22:02,026
-Szechuan sauce, Morty.
-What are you talking about?
620
00:22:02,154 --> 00:22:03,064
That's what's gonna take us
621
00:22:03,197 --> 00:22:05,108
-all the way to the end, Morty.
-What are you talking about?!
622
00:22:05,241 --> 00:22:06,356
Nine more seasons, Morty.
623
00:22:06,492 --> 00:22:08,904
Nine more seasons until I get
that dipping Szechuan sauce.
624
00:22:09,036 --> 00:22:10,652
-What is that?!
-For 97 more years, Morty!
625
00:22:10,788 --> 00:22:11,653
What are you talking about?!
626
00:22:11,789 --> 00:22:13,746
I want that McNugget sauce.
Morty!
627
00:22:45,239 --> 00:22:46,821
[Down-tempo music plays]
628
00:22:46,949 --> 00:22:48,940
[Whirring]
629
00:22:49,076 --> 00:22:49,941
Is it ready?
630
00:22:50,077 --> 00:22:51,738
Yes.
We can bring it online now.
631
00:22:51,871 --> 00:22:52,952
Do it.
632
00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:56,323
[Whirring]
633
00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:59,291
I am Phoenix Person.
634
00:22:59,420 --> 00:23:00,956
Phoenix Person?
Is that what we settled on?
635
00:23:01,088 --> 00:23:02,954
I thought we all agreed
on Cyber Bird.
636
00:23:03,090 --> 00:23:04,922
Y-You said you didn't care
what he was called
637
00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:06,336
as long as we brought him back.
638
00:23:06,468 --> 00:23:07,799
Yeah, but Phoenix Person?
639
00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:09,259
Fine. Fuck it.
Who cares?
640
00:23:09,388 --> 00:23:10,503
[Grunts]
641
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:14,132
Ka-kaw!
47658
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