V I P S01E01 540p CTV WEB-DL AAC2 0 H 264-BTN subtitles – 100+ languages (SRT)

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Original subtitles

[camera clicking]

WHERE IS COLT ARROW?

WE'VE GOT $10 MILLION WORTH OF DIAMONDS HERE AND NO ONE TO PROTECT THEM.

I WOULDN'T WORRY TOO MUCH ABOUT IT.

THAT'S WHAT I GET FOR HIRING SOME STUPID CELEBRITY BODYGUARD.

HE'S JUST A HAS-BEEN T.V. STAR.

[both chuckling]

OH, NOW I REMEMBER YOUR T.V. SHOW,

PRIVATE D.

I USED TO WATCH THAT SHOW WHEN I WAS A LITTLE, LITTLE, LITTLE, LITTLE GIRL.

IT WASN'T THAT LONG AGO.

WOULD YOU DO THAT POSE?

OH, AND SAY THE THING YOU USED TO SAY.

COME ON. YOU MEAN, UH...

TIME TO CASH OUT, PUNK.

HEY, SOMEBODY'S COMIN' UP FAST.

(man #1) HERE YOU GO.

(man #2) THANK YOU.

CAPTAIN, THERE'S A BOAT COMING UP FROM BEHIND.

FREEZE!

HANDS UP!

[grunting]

[all gasping] FREEZE! HANDS UP!

SHUT DOWN THE ENGINES! NOW!

[women sighing]

TAKE OFF THE JEWELS AND PUT 'EM IN THE BAG.

[woman gasping]

PUT 'EM IN THE BAG.

HURRY UP!

HEY, EASY. WE'LL COOPERATE.

THERE'S NO NEED TO GET ROUGH.

[men groaning]

[explosions]

IT SOUNDED LIKE AN EXPLOSION.

NO, NO. IT'S JUST THE BOAT SETTLING.

[groaning]

QUICK WILLIAMS. NICE TO MEET YOU.

[groaning]

I KNOW I HEARD A GUNSHOT THIS TIME.

SHOULDN'T YOU CHECK IT OUT?

ALL RIGHT.

[grunts]

OH, OK, OK, EASY.

NOBODY HAS TO GET HURT, ESPECIALLY ME.

FREEZE.

COLT, WHERE WERE YOU?

I RADIOED YOU THEY WERE COMING.

YOU COULD HAVE STOPPED THEM FROM BOARDING THE SHIP.

WELL, I WAS TIED UP.

BESIDES, QUICK AND TASHA HAVE IT UNDER CONTROL.

HUH? GET DOWN.

[grunting]

TIME TO CASH OUT, PUNKS.

AH! TASHA, QUICK, TIE THESE PUNKS UP.

NIKKI, YOU NOTIFY THE AUTHORITIES.

THESE PEOPLE ALL WORK FOR YOU?

I ALWAYS HAVE ASSOCIATES WORKING UNDERCOVER.

I WAS JUST WAITING FOR THE RIGHT TIME TO SPRING THE TRAP.

YOUR DIAMONDS, I PRESUME?

YOU'RE A GENIUS.

NOW THAT I'VE SAVED THE DAY,

I DID NOTICE ONE OF YOUR MODELS

WAS A LITTLE FRIGHTENED DOWN BELOW.

I THINK I BETTER CHECK ON HER.

WHAT AN AMAZING MAN. COOL AS A CUCUMBER.

HOW LONG HAVE ALL YOU GUYS WORKED FOR HIM?

TOO LONG.

♪ YOUR SKIN ♪

♪ TOUCH THAT I NEED ♪

♪ YOUR LIPS ♪

♪ AND THE FIRE THAT BREATHES ♪

♪ JUST TO FEEL ♪

♪ YOUR BODY INSIDE ♪

♪ ONE KISS ♪

♪ AND I GO OUT OF MY MIND ♪

♪ I'LL LEAVE YOU BREATHLESS ♪

♪ IT'S JUST A MATTER OF TIME ♪

♪ I'LL LEAVE YOU BREATHLESS ♪

♪ DRIVE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND ♪

[gonging]

GOOD MORNING, MADAM.

SO, JAMES, WHAT ARE WE HAVING TODAY?

CREPE SUZETTE? EGGS BENEDICT?

NO, IT'S YOUR FAVORITE.

A HOT DOG?

I DON'T LIKE HOT DOGS.

YOU LOVE HOT DOGS. THEY'RE ALL YOU EAT.

HOT DOGS. HOT DOGS.

HOT DOGS. HOT DOGS. HOT DOGS. HOT DOGS.

[screaming] NO! NO!

(man) I SAY, CAN I HAVE A HOT DOG? NO. NO.

NO.

VAL, WAKE UP.

OH, I'M SORRY.

WELCOME TO TAIL OF THE PUP.

WHAT KIND OF HOT DOG CAN I GET YOU?

A CHILI DOG WITH EXTRA CHILI.

CHILI DOG, EXTRA CHILI.

(Maxine) COMIN' UP.

[people chattering]

THERE HAS TO BE SOMETHING BETTER THAN THIS.

HMM. WELCOME TO L.A., HONEY.

WHAT DID YOU THINK, YOU'D HOP OFF THE BUS

AND BECOME RICH AND FAMOUS OVERNIGHT?

WELL, IT DOESN'T HURT TO DREAM.

OH, LOOK, THERE'S A LIMO.

A LIMO? OOH! WHERE'S THE LIMO?

MY GOD. OH, MY GOD. WHO'S THAT? WHO'S THAT?

(Val) IT'S, UH...

[screaming] OH, MY GOD! IT'S BRAD CLIFF,

OK? BRAD CLIFF. THAT IS BRAD CLIFF.

YOU ARE BRAD CLIFF.

YOU CAUGHT ME. UH-HUH!

[all laughing]

CAN I HAVE A HOT DOG, A LITTLE MUSTARD, NO ONIONS?

MMM-HMM. YOU WANT A HOT DOG?

EVEN MOVIE STARS HAVE TO EAT.

[chuckling] YES, YOU DO. YES, YOU...

OK, OK, HOLD ON. HOT DOG.

OH, NO, DON'T-- DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

IT'S ON ME. IT'S ON HER.

YEAH. YOU'LL GIVE ME SOMETHING TO WRITE HOME ABOUT. THANK YOU.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

YOU'RE WELCOME. YOU ARE WELCOME. YOU'RE SO WELCOME!

[whooping] WE SAW BRAD CLIFF.

IT'S BRAD CLIFF.

(Maxine) WAIT. HE'S STOPPING.

HOLD THIS, MIKE.

HE'S COMING BACK. HE'S COMING BACK OK. COOL, COOL.

OK, COOL. COOL.

[clearing throat]

[chuckling]

YOU KNOW, THAT WAS REALLY NICE OF YOU.

I HOPE YOU'LL GIVE ME THE OPPORTUNITY TO PAY YOU BACK.

MAYBE TAKE YOU OUT TO DINNER?

[clearing throat] DINNER?

MY NEW FILM PREMIERE'S FRIDAY. I DON'T HAVE A DATE.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO COME WITH ME?

YOU DON'T HAVE A DATE?

SURE.

YEAH, SURE, I, UH... YEAH, I'D LOVE TO GO.

(Colt) WELL, YOU'RE MY LAWYER. DEAL WITH IT.

(man) COLT, I'VE WARNED YOU FOR YEARS.

THEY'VE GOT EVERYTHING THEY NEED TO GET YOU ON TAX FRAUD.

OH, POPPYCOCK. HOW CAN THEY GET ME ON TAX FRAUD?

I DON'T PAY ANY TAXES.

[laughing]

THAT'S THE POINT. ALL THAT MONEY YOU'VE BEEN HIDING OVERSEAS,

YOU HAVE TO BRING IT BACK AND PAY WHAT YOU OWE TODAY,

OR THE I.R.S. IS THROWING YOU IN JAIL.

ALL RIGHT. I DIDN'T REALIZE IT WAS THIS SERIOUS.

LET ME JUST STRAIGHTEN A FEW THINGS OUT AND I'LL CALL YOU THIS AFTERNOON.

BYE.

[car horns blaring]

[telephone ringing]

COLT ARROW SECURITY SERVICES.

HELLO, KAY, BABY, THIS IS COLT ARROW.

I WANT YOU TO BOOK ME ON A NOON FLIGHT TO THE GRAND CAYMAN ISLANDS.

I'LL BE DROPPING BY TO PICK UP A FEW THINGS.

RIGHT, BOSS. DO YOU WANT A TOWN CAR TO TAKE YOU TO THE AIRPORT?

CAPITAL IDEA, KAY. AND LISTEN,

ANYONE WHO CALLS IN FROM HERE ON, YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM.

RIGHT, BOSS.

TIME TO CASH OUT, PUNK.

BRAD CLIFF INVITES YOU OUT ON A DATE,

AND YOU DON'T KNOW IF YOU WANNA GO?

I DIDN'T SAY I WASN'T GOING, JUST, WHY WOULD HE ASK ME?

HAVE YOU LOOKED AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR SINCE PUBERTY?

(Val) I CAN'T AFFORD TO BUY ANYTHING FOR A HOLLYWOOD PREMIERE.

[Maxine grunting]

I KEEP TELLING YOU, I'LL LEND YOU THE MONEY TO BUY YOURSELF SOMETHING,

AND THEN WHEN YOU-- YOU GET RICH AND FAMOUS, YOU CAN PAY ME BACK IN STYLE.

ARE YOU SURE THIS IS WHERE THE STARS SHOP?

YEAH, YEAH. I JUST SAW ANGELYNE HERE THE OTHER DAY.

WHERE ARE YOU GOIN', TO A FUNERAL?

♪ NEVER HAVE I WANTED SOMETHING ♪

OK. SWEET, SWEET, BUT WHAT, YOU'RE GOING TO CHURCH NOW?

LOOK, YOU GOT-- YOU GOT IT. YOU'VE GOT IT ALL.

LET IT OUT. LET IT ALL OUT. RIGHT? AM I RIGHT?

AAH! PUT IT BACK IN. PUT, BACK IN. YOU'LL GET ARRESTED IN THAT!

♪ YOU COULDN'T HURT ME IF YOU TRIED ♪

♪ YOU COULDN'T HURT ME IF I CARED ♪

WHAT, TOO SLUTTY?

FOR THE FIRST DATE.

BUT YOU MARK THAT DOWN FOR WHEN YOU NEED TO CLOSE THE DEAL.

(Maxine) SHE'S STARTING TO GET THE IDEA OF WHAT I'M GOING AFTER HERE,

YOU UNDERSTAND?

[gasping]

OH! OH! THAT'S IT.

OH, MY GOODNESS. CINDERELLA WITH AN ATTITUDE.

ELEGANT YET AVAILABLE.

NOT TOO AVAILABLE?

WELL, SEE, NO, THAT'S WHAT THE MATCHING PURSE IS FOR.

LET MAXINE SHOW YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING

THAT SHE LEARNED ON THE WAY TO THE LAUNDROMAT.

IF MR. MOVIE STAR GETS OUT OF LINE,

YOU HANDLE HIM LIKE THIS.

[objects rattling]

AND THEN HE'S A GENTLEMEN AGAIN.

WE'LL TAKE IT!

MAKE SURE THE FUNDS ARE TRANSFERRED.

I AM NOT TAKIN' ANOTHER BULLET FOR THAT JERK.

(Nikki) IF YOU GO, I GO.

(Quick) LET'S FACE IT. WE ALL SHOULD HAVE GONE LONG AGO.

THE 3 OF US MAKE A GREAT TEAM.

WE COULD START OUR OWN COMPANY.

WHY NOT?

HOW ABOUT TASHA DEXTER AND ASSOCIATES?

WHAT COULD BE MORE GLAMOROUS THAN AN EX-MODEL WHO SPIED FOR THE C.I.A.?

I NEVER WORKED FOR THE C.I.A.

OOPS, I FORGOT.

YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT THAT.

BUT DEXTER ISN'T YOUR REAL NAME, IS IT?

TOO BAD THE COLD WAR ENDED, OTHERWISE YOU WOULDN'T BE BEGGING FOR WORK.

BETTER YET, HOW ABOUT NIKKI FRANCO AND COMPANY?

EVERYONE IN LAW ENFORCEMENT KNOWS OF THE NEW YORK FRANCOS.

I NEVER GOT MIXED UP IN MY UNCLE'S BUSINESS.

MORE THE PITY.

GIVEN BOTH YOUR SHADY BACKGROUNDS,

QUICK WILLIAMS AND PARTNER, THAT MIGHT BE A NATURAL IDEA.

OH, YES, WE ALL BET ON THE YOUNG QUICK

GOING INTO HIS MIDDLEWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP FIGHT,

UNTIL HE WAS DISQUALIFIED ON DRUG CHARGES.

I WAS FRAMED 'CAUSE I WOULDN'T TAKE A DIVE.

WE QUIT, COLT. THIS TIME WE'RE THROUGH.

YOU OWE US $5,000 EACH FOR THE LAST JOB.

WE WANT IT IN CASH.

FINE.

YOU KNOW, THEY ALL TURNED ON ME IN EPISODE 13 AS WELL.

OH, MY...

BUT I SURVIVED THEN, AND I'LL SURVIVE NOW.

I JUST THINK IT'S A SHAME IT HAS TO END ON SUCH A BAD NOTE.

[bleeping]

I WAS ABOUT TO OFFER YOU ALL A VERY SWEET DEAL.

BUT IF YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED...

BOSS, YOUR TICKET TO GRAND CAYMAN.

THE TOWN CAR IS WAITING FOR YOU OUT FRONT.

THANK YOU, KAY. AND I THINK I'LL MISS YOU MOST OF ALL.

YOU KNOW, WITH MY NAME AND YOUR ABILITIES,

COLT ARROW SECURITY BECAME THE LEADER IN CELEBRITY PROTECTION.

AND AFTER ALL YOUR HARD WORK, I'D HATE TO SELL IT TO STRANGERS, BUT--

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WAIT A SECOND. SLOW DOWN.

YOU'RE SELLIN' THE ENTIRE BUSINESS?

THE OFFICES, THE JET, THE GUNS?

NO. I'M HOLDING A GARAGE SALE

AND SELLING 'EM OFF PIECE BY PIECE

BEFORE I FLY OUT IN AN HOUR.

WHAT I'M SAYING IS THAT

THIS WHOLE THING COULD BE YOURS, IF YOU WANT IT.

PLUS THE GREAT COLT ARROW NAME

AND THE SLOGAN, "TIME TO CASH OUT, PUNK."

WHAT'S YOUR BID? A QUARTER MILLION?

$100,000?

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I'LL DO. I'LL SELL IT TO YOU FOR $5,000 APIECE.

[chuckling] DEAL?

I WANT TO SEE THE FINE PRINT.

I--I WANT TO SEE A CONTRACT.

I WANT TO SEE THE BOOKS.

ALL RIGHT. THERE'S THE FINE PRINT.

YOU FILL IT OUT HOWEVER YOU WANT TO.

SO GOODBYE, GOOD LUCK.

AND I'LL EVEN TOSS IN THE JAG.

WOW.

HE JUST SOLD YOU THE WHOLE COMPANY.

WITH A BLANK CONTRACT.

SO, WHY DO I FEEL SO DIRTY?

BECAUSE SOMEHOW, SOMEWAY, HE'S DONE IT TO US AGAIN.

♪ IT'S PLAYTIME ♪

(Brad) YOU LOOK NICE.

I'VE GOT GREAT INSTINCTS ABOUT PEOPLE.

I KNEW RIGHT AWAY THAT YOU'D CLEAN UP GOOD.

THANK YOU. YEAH.

IT'S TOUGH ON ME, YOU KNOW?

I NEVER DATE THE SAME GIRL TWICE.

I CAN BELIEVE THAT.

YEAH.

MY FEMALE FANS WANT TO KNOW THAT I'M UNATTACHED.

[chuckling]

KEEPS 'EM DREAMIN'.

BESIDES, A GUY LIKE ME

SHOULD SPREAD HIMSELF AROUND.

DON'T YOU AGREE?

I THINK YOU SHOULD BE SPREAD AROUND.

BUT, FUNNY THING.

I DON'T DATE THE SAME PERSON TWICE, EITHER.

(announcer) DRIVING UP NOW IS THE STAR OF CRUEL JUSTICE,

MR. BRAD CLIFF.

[crowd cheering]

(woman) THERE HE IS.

OVER THIS WAY. CAN YOU LOOK THIS WAY, BRAD?

(man) MAKE SURE WE GET THAT SHOT.

(reporter) BRAD, WE'RE HERE FROM B.P.N. NEWS.

CAN YOU TELL US ANYTHING ABOUT...

HI. HEY!

(woman) AH! GREAT SHOT. THANKS, BRAD.

(Brad) HOW YOU DOIN'? THANKS FOR COMING.

ALL RIGHT. YEAH.

[people clamoring]

HEY, THERE.

(woman) CAN YOU GIVE US A QUICK STATEMENT, BRAD?

HEY, LARRY. GOOD TO SEE YOU.

HI.

CLIFF!

HUH?

[all screaming]

[groans]

(man) SHE GOT HIM.

[all cheering]

(man) YEAH, YEAH!

(Brad) IS IT OVER?

[all chattering]

(man) OVER HERE. GET THE SHOT.

(woman) WOW.

(woman) HEY, WHO'S THIS GIRL? SHE'S GREAT!

BED HER

BUT, ACTUALLY, SHE LEAPT IN FRONT OF ME

AND I WAS TRYING TO PUSH HER OUT OF THE WAY.

WHY WOULD SHE LEAP INTO THE PATH OF A GUNMAN?

WELL, 'CAUSE SHE'S, UM, UH, A PROFESSIONAL BODYGUARD.

(reporter) A BODYGUARD?

THE BEST.

I COULD HAVE TAKEN CARE OF THAT GUY, BUT, HEY, IT'S HER JOB.

SHE INSISTED THAT IN THIS TYPE OF SITUATION,

I SHOULD DROP TO MY KNEES BEHIND HER.

FOR HER SAFETY AS WELL AS MY OWN.

SO YOU'RE A BODYGUARD TO THE STARS?

UM...

YES.

UH...

HMM, UH, YEAH. I'M A BODYGUARD.

SO AS A PROFESSIONAL BODYGUARD,

YOU'RE TRAINED TO HANDLE THESE SITUATIONS.

YOU WEREN'T AFRAID?

NO, NO, I--I WASN'T AFRAID.

I DO THIS ALL THE TIME.

THIS IS LIZ SMITH REPORTING IN THE AFTERMATH

OF BRAD CLIFF'S LATEST MOVIE PREMIERE,

WHERE THE REAL STAR

WAS THE CELEBRATED BODYGUARD VALLERY IRONS.

SHE'S ONE OF HOLLYWOOD'S UNSUNG HEROINES.

I FIRST MET VALLIE WHEN SHE WAS PROTECTING BABS AT THE...

IRONS IS WELL-KNOWN IN HOLLYWOOD,

WHERE HER CLIENTS ARE RUMORED TO INCLUDE MADONNA,

TOM CRUISE, AND HARRISON FORD.

THIS RECENT ATTACK HIGHLIGHTS THE GROWING NEED

FOR CELEBRITIES TO HIRE HIGH-PROFILE PROTECTION...

[speaking German]

(Quick) SO THE COMPETITION HEATS UP,

AND HE'S ON THE RUN FROM THE I.R.S.

SO MUCH FOR THE GREAT COLT ARROW NAME.

WAIT A SECOND, KAY.

YOU SAID WE HAD $1.6 MILLION IN ASSETS.

WE DO, BUT IT'S ALL IN PERSONAL LOANS TO COLT.

BUT WHAT ABOUT THE JET, THE CARS, THE OFFICES, THE PENTHOUSE?

EVERYTHING IS UNDER LONG-TERM LEASE.

WE DON'T OWN ANYTHING.

SO WE'RE BROKE?

WELL, COMPARING OUTSTANDING RECEIVABLES--

NO, NO, NO, NO. JUMP PAST THE ACCOUNTANT TALK.

WHAT'S IN THE BANK? CASH.

[clearing throat]

$210.

HA! I KNEW IT! HE TOOK US AGAIN.

SO IF WE LIQUIDATED THE COMPANY,

IT WOULDN'T EVEN BE WORTH THE $15,000, THAT WE GAVE HIM.

ACTUALLY, UM, IT'S JUST A LITTLE WORSE THAN THAT.

IT WOULD COST $100,000 TO SHUT THE COMPANY DOWN.

HERE YOU GO.

DON'T I KNOW YOU?

NO, YOU DON'T. THANK YOU.

OK, I GOT IT. WE CALL THE GLOBE.

WE FIND OUT HOW MUCH THEY'RE WILLING TO PAY

FOR THE INSIDE STORY OF HOW VALLERY IRONS AND BRAD CLIFF

GOT SECRETLY ENGAGED.

UH, I'M NOT GONNA DO THAT.

OK. OK, EVEN BETTER.

THE INSIDE STORY OF YOU PROTECTING ELLEN FROM GAY BASHERS.

I'M NOT A BODYGUARD, OK? I FELT SORRY FOR HIM.

OK. FINE, FINE. "I WASN'T AFRAID AT ALL. I DO THIS ALL THE TIME."

I'M A TERRIBLE LIAR. THIS WHOLE THING'S GONNA BLOW UP IN MY FACE.

OK, WELL, THEN, FINE.

WE'LL SELL THE INSIDE STORY OF HOW YOU FOOLED EVERYBODY.

NO. NO, FORGET IT.

I'M GONNA THINK OF SOMETHIN'.

(man on radio) HOLLYWOOD BODYGUARD, VALLERY IRONS,

IS RUMORED TO BE PROTECTING BRUCE WILLIS FOLLOWING...

(Kay) YOU'RE LOOKING AT THIS IN THE WRONG WAY.

IT'S A VERY SUCCESSFUL COMPANY.

IT GROSSES 3 TO 4 MILLION DOLLARS A YEAR.

THAT HAS TO BE WORTH SOMETHING.

NOT WITHOUT COLT ARROW. HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT ONE THING

FAMOUS PEOPLE LIKE FAMOUS NAMES,

OR AT LEAST SEMI-FAMOUS NAMES.

I GOTTA EAT SOMETHING.

[sighing]

WHY COULDN'T WE GET SOMEONE ELSE FOR NAME VALUE,

A SEMI-FAMOUS FIGUREHEAD?

THIS TIME WE GET A FAIR SHARE OF THE PROFITS.

SURE. LET'S JUST CALL UP VALLERY IRONS. I'M SURE SHE'S NOT BUSY.

(Nikki) VALLERY IRONS?

OK, OK. IT WAS A DUMB IDEA. DON'T RUB IT IN.

YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT? THERE'S SOMETHIN' FUNNY ABOUT THAT WHOLE THING.

I MEAN, HOW COME WE HAVE NEVER HEARD OF THIS VALLERY IRONS?

[birds chirping]

YEAH, IT'S ME.

BUT YOU'RE...

I MADE UP THE WHOLE THING, OK?

I MEAN, I'M NOT A REAL BODYGUARD.

COVER THE EXITS.

UH, DID YOU WANT A HOT DOG?

[sirens wailing]

[telephone ringing] OH, DETECTIVE GRISPY, HI.

I'M MYRON GREEN. HOW DO YOU DO?

MR. CLIFF'S PERSONAL MANAGER. HOW ARE YOU, MIKE?

THANK YOU BOTH FOR COMING, BUT WHERE'S VALLERY IRONS?

I ASSUMED SHE WENT EVERYWHERE WITH YOU.

WHAT?

OH, THE BODYGUARD.

RIGHT. I, UH, I LET HER GO.

SHE WAS TOO EXPENSIVE.

YOU'VE STILL GOT THAT GUY LOCKED UP, DON'T YOU?

WELL, WE DO, BUT THIS ISN'T OVER.

UH, DID YOU FIND OUT WHY HE WANTED TO KILL BRAD?

HIS NAME IS FRANK SHACKLE.

HE'S THE RIGHT-HAND MAN TO JACKSON NASAR,

AND THE HEAD OF THE TEXAS MAD DOG MILITIA,

AN ANTI-GOVERNMENT FRINGE GROUP.

SOUND FAMILIAR?

NASAR, MAD DOG...

VAGUELY.

WELL, LET ME REFRESH YOUR MEMORY.

A SCENE FROM YOUR LATEST MOVIE. AHH.

[sobbing] SO, THE FEARLESS JACKSON NASAR,

[scoffing]

CRYING LIKE A LITTLE GIRL.

YOU'RE NOT SO BRAVE WITHOUT YOUR GUNS

AND YOUR MAD DOG MILITIA?

ARE YOU, JACKSON NASAR?

YOU AND ALL YOUR ANTI-GOVERNMENT MILITIA BUDDIES

MAKE ME WANT TO PUKE.

[grunting]

YOU THINK YOU'RE PATRIOTS?

YOU'RE NOTHIN' BUT A BUNCH OF COWARDLY WHINERS

THAT CAN'T HACK IT IN THE REAL WORLD!

[laughing]

OH, YEAH, I REMEMBER NOW.

YOU SEE, I LIKE TO REWRITE MY LINES,

AND I SAW THIS NEWSPAPER ARTICLE ABOUT THIS MILITIA GROUP--

BRAD, YOU USED THE NAME OF A REAL NUT? WHAT--WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY?

WHAT? I THOUGHT IT WOULD GIVE THE FILM A TOUCH OF REALITY.

[laughing] WHAT?

YOU THINK THERE'S SOME KIND OF CONNECTION BETWEEN ALL THIS?

VALLERY IRONS PROTECTION, V.I.P.

IT WILL BE THE HOTTEST NAME IN HIGH-PROFILE SECURITY.

AND WE'LL TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING. YOU'LL NEVER BE IN ANY DANGER.

YOU WON'T EVEN HAVE TO CARRY A GUN.

YOU'LL PROBABLY NEVER EVEN LEAVE THE OFFICE.

YOU'LL GET AN EXPENSE ACCOUNT,

COMPANY CAR, CORPORATE JET,

AND A SUITE AT A LUXURY HOTEL.

YOU'LL PROBABLY CLEAR BETTER THAN HALF A MILLION A YEAR.

THE ONLY DOWNSIDE IS

YOU'LL HAVE TO DINE AT THE BEST RESTAURANTS,

STAY AT THE FINEST HOTELS, AND HANG OUT WITH FAMOUS PEOPLE.

WELL?

♪ NEVER HAVE I WANTED SOMETHING MORE ♪

GOODBYE, HOT DOGS! WHOO!

♪ NEVER HAVE I LISTENED SO CLOSELY ♪

♪ THAN TO WHAT YOU'RE SAYIN' ♪

♪ YOU COULDN'T HURT ME IF YOU TRIED ♪

♪ YOU COULDN'T HURT ME IF I CARED ♪

♪ YOU'LL SEE SOMEHOW ♪

[tires screeching]

OH, MY GOD!

♪ AND I'M HERE NOW ♪

DID YOU SEE THAT?

WHERE DID YOU LEARN HOW TO DRIVE LIKE THIS?

I DIDN'T. I JUST SLAMMED THE BRAKES ON TOO HARD AND I LOST CONTROL.

VAL, WHERE DID YOU GET THIS CAR?

OH, GET IN. I WANT TO TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT.

NO, I'M NOT GETTIN' IN, I'M WORKIN' HERE. I CAN'T GET IN.

TAKE A BREAK.

I CAN'T TAKE A BREAK. HE'S NOT GONNA GIVE ME A BREAK.

SHE'S TAKING A BREAK!

I'M NOT TAKIN' A BREAK. GET IN THE JAG.

I GOT TO SHOW YOU MY NEW PENTHOUSE. PENTHOUSE?

SUNSET BOULEVARD. SUNSET BOULEVARD?

GET IN!

I'M TAKIN' A BREAK. I'M TAKIN' A BREAK.

AND I QUIT!

[muttering]

MR. NASAR, EVERYONE'S READY TO MOVE OUT, SIR.

[machine gun firing] GOOD.

THIS TIME WE'LL LAUNCH A FULL-SCALE WAR TO GET CLIFF.

I DON'T CARE HOW MANY HOLLYWOOD HOTSHOTS HE HAS PROTECTING HIM.

NOBODY STOPS JACKSON NASAR.

NOBODY.

[birds twi

[Maxine moaning]

JUST A LITTLE BETTER THAN OUR PLACE, DON'T YOU THINK?

OH, IT'S LIKE A HOTEL.

LOOK AT THIS. GORGEOUS.

HOLLYWOOD SIGN, INDOOR/OUTDOOR POOL.

[laughing] OH, MAN.

IS THIS FOR REAL, VAL?

OH, WOW! IT'S BEAUTIFUL. IT'S GORGEOUS.

THIS IS JUST KIND OF WEIRD, THESE PICTURES.

YEAH, IT'S KIND OF CREEPY, HIM STARING AT US LIKE THIS,

YOU KNOW, WITH YOU TAKIN' HIS CAR AND HIS PENTHOUSE.

WELL, HE STUCK 'EM WITH A LONG-TERM LEASE.

THEY HAD TO GIVE IT TO SOMEBODY,

AND I AM THE WORLD'S MOST FAMOUS BODYGUARD.

[beeping]

WHOA!

[tittering]

WELL, I HOPE YOU DON'T HAVE TO WEAR HIS CLOTHES, TOO.

THIS IS SO COOL.

[gasps] DID YOU HEAR THAT?

[beeping]

I WONDER WHAT THIS BIG RED BUTTON DOES.

NO, NO, NO, NO!

[exclaiming]

UM, AHEM.

V-VAL, TELL ME AGAIN WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OLD FIGUREHEAD.

WAS HE KILLED OR SOMETHING?

THEY PROMISED ME I'D NEVER EVEN TOUCH A GUN. SURE.

SO I'M SURE WE CAN JUST GET RID OF ALL THAT STUFF.

YEAH, YEAH. VAL, ARE YOU SURE

YOU'VE THOUGHT THIS ALL THE WAY THROUGH?

I REALLY LIKE THE JAG.

(Kay) I GOT THE PHONE LISTING CHANGED ALREADY.

WE SHOULD PUT A GIANT PORTRAIT OF VAL, RIGHT THERE.

ENOUGH WITH THE PORTRAITS.

LET'S GO UPSCALE

WITH SOME ART DECO FURNITURE, IMPRESSIONIST PAINTINGS.

BORING.

LET'S STRIP THE WALLS AND GO INDUSTRIAL WITH GRAFFITI, BLACK LEATHER.

HEY, HEY, LET'S MAKE SURE THIS IDEA WORKS

BEFORE WE SINK ANY MONEY INTO REMODELING.

[muttering]

(Green) WITH THAT NUT, NASAR, RUNNING AROUND,

THE POLICE CAN'T PROVIDE ENOUGH SECURITY.

WE HAVE TO CALL VALLERY IRONS.

I DON'T CARE WHAT IT COSTS. SHE'S THE BEST.

MY BRAD DESERVES THE BEST.

I FORGET HER NUMBER.

I GUESS WE'LL HAVE TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE.

DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.

MADELINE, GET ME VALLERY IRONS' NUMBER.

I NEED TO SPEAK TO HER IMMEDIATELY.

(Madeline) YES, SIR.

I THINK IT'S UNLISTED.

I'VE GOT IT. VALLERY IRONS PROTECTION.

V.I.P. THEY'RE IN DIRECTORY ASSISTANCE. THEY ARE?

[telephone ringing]

VALLERY IRONS PROTECTION.

YES.

WE'VE ALREADY GOT OUR FIRST CLIENT.

SOUNDS LIKE A BIG ONE.

I SEE. COULD I ASK YOU TO HOLD ONE MOMENT, PLEASE?

IT'S BRAD CLIFF'S MANAGER. HE WANTS TO TALK TO VALLERY.

HE SAYS IT'S AN EMERGENCY.

CLIFF'S MANAGER? BUT CLIFF KNOWS SHE'S A FAKE.

THEY'RE TRYING TO BLACKMAIL US.

NO, HE HAS TO KEEP THIS A SECRET MORE THAN WE DO.

MAYBE HE HASN'T EVEN TOLD HIS MANAGER YET.

EVEN WORSE, THIS COULD ALL BLOW UP IF SHE TAKES THE JOB.

I'LL HANDLE IT.

THIS IS TASHA DEXTER, MS. IRONS' LEAD ASSOCIATE.

I THOUGHT SHE FINISHED HER WORK FOR MR. CLIFF.

[Green chattering on phone]

JACKSON NASAR?

MAD DOG MILITIA?

SHE'S EXPENSIVE FOR AROUND-THE-CLOCK PROTECTION.

$25,000 A DAY, PLUS EXPENSES

AND A $100,000 RETAINER.

$25,000? WE NEVER--

WHAT?

ALL RIGHT. OF COURSE.

HE SAID FINE.

[gasping] HE'S COMING DOWN WITH A CASHIER'S CHECK.

WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

FOR $25,000 A DAY? WHATEVER THE HELL THEY WANT.

CALL VALLERY, TELL HER TO GET DOWN HERE FAST.

SHE SHOULD WEAR SOMETHING APPROPRIATE.

TELL HER TO DRESS THE PART.

♪ IT'S JUST A DREAM ♪

IT'S AMAZING WHAT YOU CAN ORDER FROM ROOM SERVICE.

♪ IT'S JUST A DREAM ♪

YOU KNOW, VAL, I'VE BEEN THINKIN'.

SO YOU GET SHOT AT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE,

TAKE A BULLET HERE OR THERE.

I MEAN, IT BEATS WORKIN' AT A HOT DOG STAND.

(Val) MAXINE! HUH?

MAXINE! HUH?

HELLO. HEY!

I'M SORRY. MY MIND WANDERED.

[chuckling]

I GOT TO GO. THEY CALLED ALREADY.

THEY HAVE SOME KIND OF JOB OFFER.

OH, WAIT, WAIT, HEY, HEY.

YOU KNOW, VAL, I HAVE BEEN THINKIN'.

YOU'RE LEAVING ME IN A BIND,

WHAT WITH HAVING TO FIND A NEW ROOMMATE,

AND OUR APARTMENT WASN'T SO HOT,

AND THERE'S AN EXTRA BEDROOM...

STATISTICALLY, IT IS NOT SAFE

FOR A GIRL TO LIVE ALONE IN A LUXURY PENTHOUSE.

SEE, SEE, YOU'RE READING MY MIND.

WOULD YOU PLEASE MOVE IN WITH ME? WELL, I DON'T KNOW, VAL.

YOU'RE MESSY. OK, FORGET IT.

WAIT, I'M JUST KIDDING, JUST KIDDING.

YEAH, I WANT TO MOVE IN. THANK YOU.

OK, WELL, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO WEAR?

I GOT TO GO. UM, UM, UM...

WHAT DOES A FAMOUS FEMALE BODYGUARD DRESS LIKE?

DRESS TO KILL, HONEY. DRESS TO KILL.

OH, I KNOW JUST WHAT TO WEAR.

CLIFF'S HEADING ACROSS TOWN.

DO YOU WANT US TO RUN HIM OFF THE ROAD?

NO, IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT HIM ANYMORE.

[man chattering on radio]

I WANT TO SEND A MESSAGE TO ALL OF HOLLYWOOD.

I WANT VALLERY IRONS.

SHE--SHE REALLY IS A BODYGUARD?

YEAH, OF COURSE. YOU HIRED HER.

OH, WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU DIDN'T HIRE HER, DID YOU?

NO. I ASKED HER OUT ON A DATE. OH.

AND WHEN THAT GUY CAME RUNNIN' IN OUT OF THE...

YOU LUCKY S.O.B.

ONLY YOU COULD ASK A PRETTY GIRL OUT ON A DATE

AND IT'S THE NIGHT YOU GET ATTACKED,

AND SHE JUST HAPPENS TO BE THE BEST BODYGUARD IN ALL OF HOLLYWOOD.

YEAH.

YEAH, SHE--SHE WAS WORKIN' UNDERCOVER AT THAT HOT DOG STAND.

NO WONDER SHE TOOK THE GUY OUT.

SHE WAS PRETTY UPSET THAT I BLEW HER COVER WITH THE PRESS.

OH, YEAH, SHE'S GOOD, ALL RIGHT.

YEAH, SHE'S DAMN GOOD.

(Val) HI. HI.

[whistles] HEY, GUYS.

YOU GO, GIRL!

I DON'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF AGENCY YOU WORKED FOR BEFORE,

BUT OUR DRESS CODE IS STRICTLY BUSINESS ATTIRE.

BLOW OFF, MAN. IT'S A GREAT ANGLE.

BESIDES, CLIFF WILL BE HERE ANY SECOND.

WHAT, CLIFF'S OUR FIRST CLIENT?

THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE.

AS IF ANY OF THIS DOES.

I KNEW SHE WAS A BODYGUARD.

I WAS JUST CURIOUS TO SEE WHAT HER LITTLE GAME WAS.

I GOT A 6TH SENSE ABOUT THESE THINGS.

I KNOW ANOTHER PROFESSIONAL WHEN I SEE ONE.

AND THIS IS YOUR OFFICE.

THE DESK IS BULLETPROOF.

MMM-HMM.

OH, THIS REMOTE CONTROLS THE ALARM, THE LIGHTS,

THE EMERGENCY ESCAPE DOOR, AND OF COURSE...

YOU KNOW, I--I DIDN'T THINK I WAS GOING TO BE IN ANY DANGER.

YOU KNOW, YOU GUYS HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF.

I NEVER TOUCH A GUN. REMEMBER?

WHAT IS ALL THAT FOR?

NOTHING.

[chuckling]

COLT JUST HAD IT INSTALLED TO IMPRESS GIRLS.

HE USED THE ESCAPE DOOR TO LEAVE WORK EARLY.

I SEE.

MOST OF WHAT WE DO AROUND HERE IS REALLY, REALLY BORING.

I'M SURE THIS CASE WILL BE JUST LIKE THAT.

[tires screeching]

[alarm buzzing] CLIFF IS IN THE ELEVATOR.

THAT'S NASAR GETTIN' OUT OF THE VAN.

ANOTHER VAN IN THE GARAGE, ONE ON EACH SIDE OF THE BUILDING.

LOOKS LIKE HE BROUGHT THE WHOLE MILITIA.

ALL UNITS MOVE IN. BE CAREFUL.

THIS WILL BE OVER BEFORE S.W.A.T. CAN GET HERE, MAN.

WE ARE ON OUR OWN.

I AM NOT LOSING OUR FIRST CLIENT WITHOUT A FIGHT.

LET'S NOT UNDERESTIMATE WHO WE'RE DEALING WITH.

VALLERY IRONS WON'T GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT.

(Kay) THIS IS NOT A BUSINESS ABOUT GUN.

IT'S ABOUT COMMON SENSE, AND PEOPLE SKILLS, OF COURSE.

THERE'S GONNA BE A BLOODBATH.

WE'LL TRY AND GET CLIFF BACK HERE IN ONE PIECE.

KAY, CALL 911. AS IF.

[sighs]

OF COURSE, SOMETIMES THINGS DO GET A LITTLE CRAZY AROUND HERE.

SO I COUNTED AT LEAST 25. YOU THINK WE GOT A CHANCE?

NOPE. ME, NEITHER.

SHE HAD THAT 100-YARD STARE,

THAT I'M-READY-TO-DIE LOOK.

I REMEMBER IT FROM NAM.

BRAD, YOU NEVER WENT TO NAM.

I DID A FILM ABOUT ME BEING IN NAM.

SAME THING.

LEARNED HOW TO FACE DEATH THROUGH SNEER.

OH, NO! DON'T HURT ME! PLEASE! PLEASE!

THEY HAVE ALL THE EXITS COVERED.

THEY'RE IN THE LOBBY.

NIKKI, STOP THE ELEVATOR!

YOU COULD HAVE JUST PRESSED THE STOP BUTTON.

I'LL PIN 'EM DOWN BELOW.

THEY KNOW WE'RE COMING. UP THE STAIRWELL. BE CAREFUL. LET'S GO. MOVE IT.

SHUT UP! WELCOME TO VALLERY IRONS PROTECTION.

I ASSUME YOU'RE MR. GREEN.

I WAS TOLD THAT YOU WOULD HAVE A CASHIER'S CHECK FOR THE RETAINER.

THANK YOU.

YOU UNDERSTAND IT'S NONREFUNDABLE.

(Nasar) LET'S GO. HEADS UP.

ALPHA TEAM, NORTH SIDE. MOVE! MOVE!

(Nasar) MOVE IT! GO! GO!

NIKKI, THEY'RE COMING UP THE 4TH FLOOR STAIRWELL. GET READY.

(Tasha) DON'T TAKE ANY CHANCES.

JUST TRY TO KEEP 'EM PINNED DOWN UNTIL S.W.A.T. GETS HERE.

(Nasar) TAKE HER OUT.

(man) FIRE! FIRE! FIRE BACK!

NIKKI, THERE ARE TOO MANY OF THEM.

RETREAT UNTIL WE CAN JOIN YOU.

YOU CAN'T TAKE THEM ALL OUT BY YOURSELF.

I SAID RETREAT.

(Nasar) FIRE! FIRE! COVER HIS BACK!

(man) TAKE HER OUT!

WE GOT TO GET DOWN THERE. KAY, GET DEAD MEAT INTO THE BACK.

EXCUSE ME, GENTLEMEN, IF YOU WOULD FOLLOW ME THIS WAY.

OK, GET BEHIND THE DESK. IT'S BULLETPROOF.

IF THINGS GET TOO BAD OUT THERE...

ESCAPE DOOR.

AND, UM, JUST IN CASE. YEAH.

UM...

(Kay) GOOD CHOICE.

VERY ACCURATE.

AN EXPERT CAN HIT A DIME AT 100 YARDS.

WELL, AT LEAST THEY SAY.

NIKKI'S ONLY DONE IT AT 20.

IF WE LIVE THROUGH THIS,

I WANT TO READ MY JOB DESCRIPTION.

G UP YOUR

(Blitzmeyer) THAT'S RIGHT. THEY'RE SHOOTING ALL OVER THE PLACE.

WELL, WE'RE UNDER SIEGE BY THE TEXAS MAD DOG MILITIA.

(Tasha) NIKKI, HOLD THEM OFF. WE'RE ON OUR WAY DOWN.

[man grunting]

(Nasar) LOOK OUT! LOOK OUT!

TASHA, I'M IN TROUBLE HERE.

HANG ON! WE'RE COMING!

(Tasha) SEE IF YOU CAN MAKE IT TO THE STAIRS.

(Nasar) UP HERE. UP HERE.

THEY'VE TAKEN OVER THE 5TH FLOOR.

I'LL WIRE THE 8TH FLOOR, IT'LL BLOW THEM TO FRESNO.

[machine guns firing]

NIKKI, LET'S TRY TO DO THIS WITHOUT DESTROYING THE ENTIRE BUILDING.

YOU CAN TRY.

SEND US SOME BACKUP.

PARTY TIME! PARTY TIME!

HEY, VAL, PRETTY SLOW FIRST DAY SO FAR.

HOPEFULLY IT'LL PICK UP IN THE AFTERNOON.

DID I MENTION THAT YOU'D NEVER BE IN ANY DANGER?

[gun firing]

I'M GONNA KILL THOSE GUYS.

YOU WERE RIGHT. SHE'S PRETTY INTENSE.

(Nasar) ALL RIGHT, COME ON.

(Tasha) PULL BACK. WE'LL REGROUP ON THE 7TH FLOOR.

[man shouting]

TASHA, BE CAREFUL. HE'S RIGHT ON YOUR TAIL!

[grunts]

[screaming]

NIKKI, YOU HAVE GOT TO GET THOSE CHARGES SET.

QUICK AND TASHA ARE LOSING GROUND.

JUST GIVE ME ONE MORE SECOND.

(Quick) KAY, WE'RE RETREATING TO THE 8TH FLOOR.

(Kay) THEY'VE GOT TO 7TH FLOOR.

NOW THEY'RE USING THE SERVICE LADDERS.

THEY'RE COMING AT YOU FROM BOTH SIDES, TASHA.

YOU'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF THERE.

LAST MAG.

4 ROUNDS.

(Kay) YOU DON'T STAND A CHANCE.

NIKKI, WE NEED SOME HELP. GET READY WITH THE STUN CHARGES.

I'M ON IT.

[men grunting]

[telephone ringing]

IT'S THE POLICE. THEY'RE COMING TO SAVE US.

HELLO, V.I.P.

(Maxine) HEY, VAL. HOW'RE YOU DOIN'?

UH, UM, I--I WILL, I--I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW. I'M REALLY BUSY.

ALL RIGHT, LOOK, I NEED YOU TO PICK UP SOME THINGS...

I CAN'T. I CAN'T. I CAN'T I REALLY... I GOT TO GO.

OH, NO, NO, NO.

DON'T GIVE ME THAT "I'M MISS IMPORTANT" ATTITUDE.

(Kay) IT LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE RECOVERING.

IT DIDN'T STOP THEM. THEY'RE HEADING FOR THE STAIRS.

OK, BLOW THE BUILDING.

(Nasar) GO! GO! GO! GO!

THANKS FOR SHOWIN' SOME RESTRAINT.

(Maxine) WHAT'S ALL THAT NOISE IN THE BACKGROUND?

I MEAN, ARE THEY DOING CONSTRUCTION OR SOMETHIN'?

THIS IS A REALLY BAD TIME. I--I GOTTA GO.

I CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW, OK?

I'M DOING MY PART, YOU NEED TO DO YOUR PART.

I'VE BEEN CLEANING UP HERE ALL DAY. NOW, LOOK, COFFEE...

OK. OK. JUST, UM... CHEESE WHIZ...

WHAT WAS THAT?

(Green) WELL, IS IT-- IS IT THE POLICE?

IT'S IN CODE. I DID A FILM ABOUT COPS.

THEY'VE GOT THEIR OWN LINGO.

(man) FIRE IN THE HOLE!

[grunting]

DON'T LOOK AT ME. I DIDN'T DO IT.

VAL, EVACUATE THE CLIENT. THEY'RE COMING.

OK, WE'RE IN TROUBLE.

WOW. YOU'RE PREPARED FOR ANYTHING. GO.

I'M AFRAID. MY LEGS ARE SHAKING.

THEY'RE JUST GOING TO CATCH US ANYWAY.

WHY NOT BEG FOR MERCY? I'M GOOD AT GROVELING.

LOOK, YOU SPOILED MOVIE STAR, YOU DO EXACTLY WHAT I SAY,

OR I'LL KILL YOU BEFORE THEY DO.

OK. OK.

(man #1) DROP IT.

(man #2) ...SECURED!

WHERE ARE CLIFF AND IRONS?

THE ROOF, HELICOPTER. LONG GONE.

YOU'RE LYIN'.

THERE'S A SECRET ESCAPE STAIRWAY.

WE GOT MEN ALL AROUND THE BUILDING. THEY'LL NEVER GET OUT.

GET THEM BEFORE THE COPS ARRIVE.

ROGER.

WHERE DOES THE PASSAGEWAY GO?

WELL, MAYBE YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT YOURSELF,

BUT YOU DO HAVE 3 FRIENDS HERE.

2 FLOORS BELOW, ROOM 752.

[chuckling]

ANOTHER PATHETIC LIE.

I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT VALLERY IRONS WOULD HIRE BETTER.

I GUESS YOU DON'T TAKE ME SERIOUSLY YET, DO YOU?

NO. I'LL TALK. I'LL TALK.

YOU WANT TO KNOW WHERE IRONS IS? I WILL TELL YOU.

I'LL TELL YOU.

WELL, THE FIRST THING YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND ABOUT VALLERY IRONS

IS SHE'S THE MOST BRILLIANT MIND IN PROFESSIONAL SECURITY.

ABSOLUTELY THE BEST.

UNQUESTIONABLY A GENIUS.

YOU'RE STALLING. WHERE'S THE PASSAGEWAY GO?

THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO GET TO.

SHE DIDN'T GO DOWN THAT STUPID PASSAGE.

YOU THINK SHE'S SO DUMB AS TO LEAVE THE DOOR OPEN TO SHOW YOU WHERE SHE WENT?

SHE'S LIKE A CHESS MASTER,

ALWAYS ON THE OFFENSIVE, ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD.

YOU SEE, WE'RE ALL JUST PAWNS.

[scoffing] REALLY?

NASAR, IT'S A TRAP. SHE'S-- SHE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

YOU REALLY EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT?

CHECKMATE.

[grunting]

WELL, I, UH, I UNDERESTIMATED YOU.

BUT I HAVE YOUR FRIEND HERE, HOSTAGE. DROP IT, OR I'LL KILL HER.

PULL THAT TRIGGER, AND YOU'RE DEAD.

SHE CAN HIT A DIME AT 20 YARDS.

100 YARDS.

RIGHT. SORRY, VAL.

VAL IS A 3-TIME I.P.S.C. COMBAT SHOOTING CHAMP.

(Quick) SHE'LL DOUBLE-TAP YOU BEFORE YOUR FINGER CAN FLINCH.

YOU GO UP AGAINST VALLERY IRONS, YOU GET HURT.

WELL, I, UH, I HEARD YOU'RE GOOD,

BUT ARE YOU THAT GOOD?

DO YOU WANT TO FIND OUT?

I'M TELLIN' YOU, THIS LADY IS A KILLER.

I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYONE AS SCARY AS HER.

AND--AND HE SHOULD KNOW.

HE WAS IN NAM.

PLEASE DON'T GET BLOOD AND BRAINS ON MY ARMANI BLOUSE.

[gun cocking]

NICE WORK, VAL.

[gun cocking]

BY THE WAY, YOUR SAFETY'S ON. OH.

SO, THE FEARLESS JACKSON NASAR.

BRAD, SHUT UP.

[tires screeching]

WELL, MISS IRONS, YOU'VE DONE IT AGAIN.

LOS ANGELES AND THE REST OF THE UNITED STATES

THANKS YOU FOR CAPTURING A DANGEROUS PSYCHOPATH.

I'M SURE THIS ISN'T THE LAST TIME WE'LL BE IN YOUR DEBT.

WELL, I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT THE REST OF MY TEAM.

SO IS THIS GOING TO WORK?

PLEASURE TO WORK FOR YOU, MA'AM.

I UNDERESTIMATED YOU. YOU'RE A NATURAL.

OK. I WANT A RAISE.

♪ SHADOWS HIDE ♪

♪ AS A NEW DAWN IS BREAKING ♪

♪ SAY GOODBYE ♪

♪ TO THE LIFE YOU ONCE KNEW ♪

♪ LEAVE BEHIND ♪

♪ ALL THE SADNESS AND ACHING ♪

♪ JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪

♪ AND BECOME SOMEONE NEW ♪

HEY. YOU KNOW, THIS GUY REALLY KNEW HOW TO LIVE.

ANDRE, COLD DUCK. NOW, THAT'S CLASS.

SHALL I POUR YOU A GLASS, MADAM?

YEAH.

SO...

FIRST DAY ON THE JOB.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

HMM.

IT BEATS WORKING AT A HOT DOG STAND.