All language subtitles for Free Agents s01e02 What I Did for Work.eng

- Hey.
- Good morning, noon.

Cable company gave me a window

between 8:00 and 11:00 today,
but guess what.

They didn't show up in
the window.

They never show up
in the window.

Why even bother
giving you a window?

Why not just say, "We may or may
not be by to install cable

at some point
during your lifetime"?

Anyway, uh...

We may have to watch the movie
at your place later.

Um...

I don't know, Alex.

I worry about the boundaries
thing.

We're fine watching
at my place.

Your place is half-furnished.

You have three plates
that don't match,

one pillow, and no art.

It's like going on a date
at a yard sale.

You know
nothing's gonna happen.

I almost got very lucky
at a yard sale.

And I picked up a lovely
Guatemalan water jug

for 5 bucks as well.

This is--what about--
this is worse.

Oh...You are a mess.
Let me help you.

Thank you.

Okay. We can watch it
at my place.

But we agree beforehand--
we need rules.

Fine. Then I would ask
there be no superfluous talking,

no overly crunchy snacks,

and no, I will not pause
the film

so you can open
another bottle of--

- Hey--hey, Logan.
- Ah!

Just a control freak.

I mean a single man
and a woman with a past

who work together,
watching a movie late at night--

It's just a very complex
gray area.

We need those rules.

Like we have to agree
up front there's no funny stuff.

So what, no exploding cigar,
no squirting flower?

And we have to agree
on enforcement.

- Enforcement?
- So if we can't keep the rules,

someone needs to be the one
to call time out.

Oh. Oh!

All right, well...

You do it.

? Help me, baby if you can ?

? sometimes it's more ?

? than I can stand ?

? help me, baby ?

Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com

But I'm always the only guy
at these things.

I'm not going
to a book club, okay?

"A", they're stupid, boring,

and I have zero chance
of getting laid there,

and "B"--

"A."

Look, it's practically
all chicks.

Chicks who read.
Yay.

Right.
I mean, sexy librarian.

- That's the thing.
- Okay, look.

If I exhaust every single
other opportunity...

I mean, if I have absolutely
nothing else to do

but stay home and stare
at my prune bank...

I'll think about coming.

Yes!

Hey, Emma.

There's the hedge fund guy
from upstairs.

He's coming.

Don't be near me.

Okay.

Hey, they delivered us
another one of your packages.

Thanks. I think the package
guy's on downers.

Ha. Oh, and I emailed you
that article

about that Biotech IPO.

You guys should jump
on their P.R.

Genome breakthrough.
Large dollars.

Awesome. Good tip.
Thanks.

Maybe we can talk about it.

Like...later.

Cool. I'm out.

Psst!

Shut up.

Well, congratulations, Gerry.

You know, I actually
get my cable from you guys.

Oh, we all do.

We're very excited about
the merger, aren't we, chaps?

- Oh, yes.
- We can think of great things

to do for a better,
bigger Northbridge Telecom.

- Hear, hear.
- Thank you, Stephen.

Alex.
Helen.

Gerald.

Wonderful to see you,
as always.

Wonderful
to be seen, as always.

Why that dress is not
registered as a deadly weapon

is beyond me.

Oh, who says it isn't?

Yeesh.

- I've gotta go.
- Take care, Gerald.

Speak to you soon.

Take care.

What a tosser.
He's considering leaving us.

- You're kidding.
- He was spotted sharing

a charcuterie plate
of mixed meats

with Ted Elliot last week.

The douchebag
from Gooley-Matisse?

He'll steal your knickers
without taking your pants down.

Which takes a tremendous
amount of practice

but can be done.

It involves moving
the genitals to one side

and then a sharp twist
and Bob's your uncle.

Well, short of engaging in
some sort of an underwear dual,

shouldn't we try to pitch him
something more global,

- get him re-excited?
- Yes, that and...

Helen takes him out
to dinner tonight,

unbuttons a few buttons,
and does that teasy-flirty thing

which seems to put
the ribbons on his maypole.

- Well, we can't really ask--
- I'm on it.

Excuse me?

That's my figgy pudding.

I'll call him
and promise him an evening

that he'll struggle
manfully to forget.

What?

Nothing.

What?

Nothing.

No, I'm aware
that you were there.

The difference is I was there

during the window
you told me to be there.

Friday from 10:00 to 5:00?

But that's not a window.
That's Friday.

No. Okay.

Yes. No. Thank you. Fine.

Hey. You wanna grab a drink
before I meet Unger?

Um...No, thanks.

Okay, what is wrong with you?

Nothing.

Just going home
to catch up on some work

like a professional

while you're out showing
your boobs to our client.

Oh, Alex, jealousy makes you
very unattractive.

Like when you wear hats.

I'm--I'm a little bit
jealous,

but it's honestly
not about that.

I'm just surprised that
with all the legitimate tools

we have at our disposal,

you would stoop
to a cheap sexual tease

- to keep a client.
- So it is about jealousy.

I just said that it wasn--
you know what?

Actually, what you wanna do
is none of my business.

It's exactly your business.

We do whatever it takes
to keep the client.

I got game, you don't.
You're jealous.

First of all,
I hate that phrase, okay?

And second of all,
I do too "got game."

Got you into bed, didn't I?

After four glasses of wine,

which I think were
the MVPs of that game.

Just honestly thought you
had more integrity than that.

But again--
none of my business.

Stop saying that.

Hold your pieces!

So there's been
a change in plan...

Seems that Gerald Unger
has recently left his wife.

So rather than an innocent
evening of flirting with Helen

which he knows will never lead
down her rabbit hole,

he would prefer
a gentleman's night out

with fellow bachelor
Alex Taylor.

Would that I could join you,
but I'm flying to San Francisco

for my stepson's
tap dance recital.

- Oh, how's he doing?
- He's 40.

That's how he's doing.

Well, great. In fact,
I would be happy to utilize

- the professional--
- No game.

Oh, very much game.
Thank you.

You can do what you like.
Just keep him with the agency.

If you buy drugs,
get a receipt.

The IRS is loosening up
on deductions.

Ciao.

Really, I can't pull off
like any kind of hat?

No.

Yeah, yeah, I--
you get into this head space

where you punish yourself
and you punish yourself--

Oh. That's my specialty.

This has been nice, Alex.
Thank you.

Oh, please, it's my pleasure.

We--we really love
having you as a client,

and we are very excited
to pitch you some new ideas.

And I really want
to talk about this.

The company
has gone through--

You know, but first...
How 'bout we get some girls?

I--

- Excuse me?
- Some action.

You're just divorced.
Now I'm divorced.

We're just a couple of
single guys out on the prowl.

Yeah, the prowl.
The...The old prowl, yes.

I wanna find some women
and I wanna have some fun.

Y-you can help me
with that, right?

Emma. Hey.

You want any sushi or sake?

- Uh, no, thanks.
- Okay.

Actually...yeah.

Great. Um...

Get some...

Here you go.

Cheers.

Let me ask you something.

How do you flirt?

- How do I flirt?
- That thing you do with Unger.

That bubbly girly
ooh-ooh thing.

It's not like I always
flirt to get--

No, I understand.
It's business.

It's just there's this guy
upstairs and...

He said he'd be working late,
and we said we'd talk, so...

- A guy?
- Yeah.

- Wait. Like you like him?
- Sure.

Like you like him?

I'm confused. You just said
the same word twice.

- You like him.
- Sure.

I've been putting it out there.
I'm getting nothing back.

I've ruled out him being gay
or me being undesirable.

So that can only mean I'm not
sending the right signals.

Okay. Um...

What I do...

You know, I make a guy
feel attractive, you know.

Little compliments,
teasing, you know.

Example.

Oh, I don't know.
It's like an attitude.

You walk up and you say...

Hi!

Hi.

No, like...Hi!

Hi.

Hi!

Hi.

I feel like I'm saying
what I'm hearing.

You know what, never mind.
Um, good night.

Emma, I thought you said
you liked this guy.

Well, yeah.

He's attractive.
He's ambitious.

And it's exactly the time
for me to start dating seriously

if I wanna be married with kids
by the time I'm 35.

You realize
that I'm 36 and single?

Exactly.
That could be me.

Okay. I say we seize the day.

Let's go up there
and say hello.

Like go up there and say hello?

Or is that code for something?

No. It's just code
for let's go up and say hi.

- Yeah.
- Hi.

We're gonna work on it
in the elevator.

- Hi.
- You know what,

other ways to flirt.

Excuse me, ladies?

Excuse me.
My friend and I just opened

a fairly expensive
bottle of champagne over there,

and we were wondering if perhaps
you'd care to join us?

Like we'd drink anything we
didn't see made in front of us?

We're not dying to get roofied.

Thank you.

Roofied? No, no--

I'm a father with two children.

Really, I'm not gonna
roofie you.

Who was that guy
in the Midwest?

- The BTK killer.
- He was married with kids.

Yeah.

But if I personally assure you

that I am in no way
gonna roofie you...

I'd think that's exactly
what you'd say

if you were going to roofie us.

Um...

I don't know how to
get out of this.

- Huh? Huh?
- Gerry...

I don't think
that's gonna happen

unless we're both willing
to submit to background checks

and quite possibly
a retinal scan.

We're 0 for 3!

I mean, it's really
a minefield out here.

Yeah, I gotta admit,
it's been about 12 years

since I've done this--
I'm a little out of practice.

Come on,
it's like riding a bike.

You know, I do have a friend
who could be very helpful

with exactly
this kind of endeavor.

So what book
didn't I read for this?

Empty Without You.

The Intimate Letters
of Eleanor Roosevelt

- to Lorena Hickok--
- Dude, if this chick

you mentioned is not
at least a six,

- I get to bang your wife.
- That's unfair!

What if our numbering
systems are different?

What if you hook up
with someone

and I'm like, "Yay!
I'm safe! It's a six."

And then you're like,
"That was a five."

And then you start, you know,
messing around with Gloria?

That's not fair.

Go for Dan.

Hi, it's Alex
with what could be

a major opportunity for you.

I'm out with Unger,
and we need, um...uh...

some companions.

You want us to come hang?

No, we need--

We need girls.
We need girls.

You need my help keeping
the big whale in the pond.

- Where you at?
- We're at Gilfillin's.

And make it snappy, okay?

On it!
Nice!

FYI--a whale couldn't
survive in a pond.

You don't know how big
the pond is.

I don't know--maybe it's not
like riding a bike.

No, it is.

It's just a very
complicated bike

that takes most of your life
to figure out.

Gerald!
Hey, how you doing, fellas?

You living it up?

Ted. What a surprise.
I'm here with a client,

and you're right on top of me.

- Like a shadow.
- Or something. Yeah.

Gerald, I still got
those Blazer tickets for ya.

Oh, this is my colleague Patty.

Patty, this is Gerald.
And Allen.

- Alex.
- Alex! I-I'm sorry.

I confuse you with this guy
Allen who works in our office.

Doesn't he remind you
of Allen? You know...

Oh, my God!
He's Allen.

Right? Right?

Gerald, great to see you.

Come join us if you get bored.

We'll win.

Win!
Ugh.

Patty's got a nice can.

Yes. Yes, but why even
look in that direction, Gerry,

when here comes my colleague,

no doubt with some very
attractive ladies...

Gerald, yo!
�Que pasa?

I would like you to meet

Catherine and Danneel.

- Hi, guys.
- Hey!

- Nice to meet you.
- So...

- Who wants shots?
- Me.

I-I would do a shot.

I'll do like two shots.

Shots for everybody then.

I'm buying.
I could really use the miles.

Ger is definitely in.
This guy...

Um...Are they even 21?

You said you wanted girls.
Suddenly you're choosy?

I'm sorry,
I just had this fantasy

that you might think
to bring women

who were even vaguely
age-appropriate.

You have weird fantasies, bro.

Expelliarmus!

Oh, that's from
Harry Potter, isn't it?

These girls are 11.

Not if you combine 'em.

Okay. Okay.
Riding a bike.

Riding a bike.

This is exciting.
Like if you guys hit it off

and get married,

you could tell the story
in your wedding speech.

Brides don't make
those speeches.

Ladies.
Saw you on the monitors.

You know you're on
the wrong floor,

and I can get into
a lot of--

Are we doing something illegal?

It's a complex question,

since while inside the building

you're technically subject
to its own internal legal--

Walter, give us a break.

We're doing a drop-by
on Emma's friend.

Andrew, uh...

From Nixon-Burke.
Oh, he's great.

So it's like
a flirting mission.

He could be the one.

So if you tell us
where his office is,

I'll tell this whole story
in my wedding speech.

Aw!

All right.
It's down there.

- You're a good man, Walter.
- Just let me call it in.

Although, I'm the only one
on at night...

Why do I even have a radio?

Andrew.

Hi.

I mean.Hi.

Hey, Emma.
You okay?

- Are you ill?
- No, I'm good.

Um...cool pens.

I was just up here and...

Uh, was wonder--

wondering if maybe you

wanted to go have
a drink sometime.

Awesome.
Yeah.

Great!

Yeah. No.
That'd be cool.

Oh. Do you have
a number?

- Is it in the directory?
- Yes.

Um...

- What is this?
- Spin Doctors.

You like the Spin Doctors?

Totally!
They might be touring.

If you--

You don't think
they're the most

overrated band
in the history of music?

The Spin Doctors operate

on like a thousand
different levels.

The Spin Doctors are so bad

that actual medical doctors

are considering changing
the name of their profession

in order to distance themselves

from those talentless
poseur art geeks

who would actually be doing
the whole world a favor

if they killed each other
in a suicide pact.

Is she gonna flirt
with another guy later

after she humiliates this guy?

You didn't even like
Little Miss?

- Ugh!
- Emma, there you--oh!

Hi!

Is this the guy you were
telling me about?

Oh, you didn't tell me
he had so many qualities

worth pointing out
and complimenting.

I said I liked his pens.

Didn't say anything
about his hair.

- Well...
- Or--oh, look at him!

This is a photo of him
holding a giant fish!

Oh! Outdoorsy!

Such broad shoulders.

See? She's nice.

Sorry. It's a deal breaker.

I'll see you around.

- Oh...
- Let's go get a drink.

Sorry.

Ohh...

Odds of a wedding seem low,

but this would make
an interesting story.

Shut up.

So when Northbridge Telecom

won the proxy fight
with Filmore Communications,

that company became
Pierce Cablevision.

Whoa, whoa.
Hang on a second.

Filmore was actually
a leveraged buyout.

Our dad worked for Pierce.
You fired him.

Sorry.

Enough about us.
I mean, uh...

What are you guys into?

Hey! There's a party
at Zeta!

We should go!

- Thanks, you guys!
- Bye! See you later.

I'm gonna go with
you guys if you want.

- Oh, it's okay.
- You sure?

- Yes.
- Yeah, no worries.

It's looking a little bit
dead around here, Gerry.

We're gonna head over
to Zanzibar

- if you wanna come with us.
- Oh, well, actually...

We're just getting started.

Yeah. I know about
this party,

and there's gonna be
women there.

And, um...

Uh...weed.

Sorry.

All right,
let me get my coat. Thanks.

- Weed?
- I don't know.

I ate a brownie once.

Can I have a check, please?

Rough night?

Oh, uh...

Definitely not gonna make
the "Best of" album, no.

Well, maybe things
will turn around.

I don't see how,
but, uh, thanks anyway.

I meant maybe meeting me
will turn things around.

O-oh!

Oh, this is...
We're hitting it off.

You're not supposed to

say that out loud,
but I think you're cute.

Um...

I'm sorry.
You wouldn't happen to--

I am here
with a friend, though.

Excuse me.
Um...

Gerry!
Don't leave.

***

You cannot be too picky or
you're gonna end up 36 and single.

What can I say?

I like what I like,
and I hate what I hate.

And as far as turning into you,
you kinda pull it off.

Hmm. All right, I'm just gonna
find Alex and make fun of him.

Why don't you grab us
a couple of gimlets.

Make sure you crush
the bartender's self-esteem

- in the process.
- Got it.

So I'm in a white kimono--

for reasons
I don't wanna go into--

and I'm staggering around,

and in Japan,
the walls are made of paper.

I step right through the wall,

and a maid sees me
and starts to shout,

"Obake! Obake!"
Which means, "Ghost! Ghost!"

in Japanese.

Hi, you two.

- Hey!
- Hello, Alex.

Gerald.
Ladies.

Yes, yes.
Two very happy ladies.

Helen, this is Susan and Kara.

Susan and Kara, this is Helen.

Well!
Okay! Great.

Have a great night tonight,
Gerald.

- Hey, we will.
- Okay.

Hey, who wants a tequila shot?

Ooh! I do.

Oh, God, if I must,
I suppose...

Look at you, gettin' it done.

I have to say,
I'm a little surprised.

Well, I don't know why.

After all, I...got game.

I'm surprised I'm...

finding this actually
a little hot.

- Ish.
- Well, thank you.

Ish.

Well, then,
I'll leave you to it.

- Good night.
- Good night.

Um...Sorry about that.

Uh...

I don't want to be too forward,

but should we think about moving
this party elsewhere?

I mean,
my place is right nearby.

Just so we're clear,
we get paid up front.

Kinda small but you know,
it's...cozy.

What?

It's $1,000
for both of us for the night

and if you want anything weird,

I mean, that's obviously extra.

Plus materials.

Are you kidding?

Fine.

800. Because we like you.

Tequila shots coming up.

This party's
just getting started.

It actually
may be winding down.

No. I'm raring to go.
You raring?

- I am raring.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- Let's all go somewhere.
- Sounds great!

Hi. Uh, I'm so sorry
to interrupt again.

I forgot my purse.

Can I just put some drinks
on your tab?

Yes, you can, that's fine.
Please go.

No, Helen, stay.
It's gonna get a little wild,

- but...
- So you wanna do a five-way?

- No, no, no, no.
- 'Cause that's an extra 500.

You're hookers?

We can pretend
not to be hookers

if it blows the fantasy.

We still have to be paid
for the sex, though.

I'm just gonna
step in here for a second.

Let's all just take
a deep breath...

And just acknowledge
how hilarious this is!

Sorry.
You do have game, Alex.

- Wow!
- You know what?

We don't have time
to go around and around.

Sorry this didn't work out.

Kara.

I'm sorry.

I'll get the check.

So...that's how
a professional does it.

No. No mocking. Not now.

Come on.
It's funny.

- Hilarious.
- Don't worry about Unger.

I'll call him.
I'll take him out to lunch.

I'll smile, touch his arm,
show some cleavage.

It's gonna be fine.

Actually, it might not
be necessary.

- Check it out.
- Gerald.

If you leave, you're an idiot.

We're the only shop
that has the resources

to handle
an international telecom.

Listen, I like the firm.
It's just--

"Oh, listen,
I like the firm."

Why don't you try loving it?
And if you think you can

do better elsewhere,
be my guest.

We'll throw a party
when your company goes bankrupt.

We'll dance and sing.

- What's your name?
- Emma.

He said his ex-wife
was a ball-buster.

It's what Emma does best.

Yeah.
Reduce a man to a puddle.

Mm. Huh.

So...Why don't you
buy me a drink?

Are you flirting with me?

No. Apparently,
I flirt too much.

I just forgot my purse
and I want a drink.

'Cause I have to warn you,
I am $1,000 for the night.

Is that how much they charge?

Apparently.
Plus materials.

What kind of materials?

I have no idea.

We don't need
this much boundaries.

You can watch
from the same zip code.

It's not a boundaries thing.

You just make so much noise
with those damn wrappers.

Which was part of
the negotiations, by the way.

Fine.

- You sure?
- Yeah.

All right.
If it's what you want.

This is what you want, isn't it,
with the eye contact?

Then you're gonna ask for
a foot rub in a minute,

and then we're off
to the races, aren't we?

I just want popcorn.
Those are gross.

- No.
- Come on.

- That is all I have left. No.
- Please!

- Absolutely not.
- Give me some,

- and I'll have sex with you.
- All right.

One handful, please.

You're supposed to stop this.

Thought you were
the rule enforcer.

I-I thought
you were the rule enforcer.

That's right.
I am.

Go sit in your chair.

- Really?
- Yes. It's the law, sir.

It's really fun so far.

I really like her hat.

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www.addic7ed.com

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