All language subtitles for Casual s01e05 Mom.eng

Previously on "Casual"...

Hi, Grandma.

Why are you at Alex's house?

My mom and I are staying
here since the divorce.

Valerie got divorced?

(Valerie) Laura and I have to go
look at houses later this afternoon.

What's wrong with my house?

You knew we weren't
gonna live here forever.

I do now.

You fat-shamed a journalist.

The bartender that wrote a blog post

that got picked up by Jezebel.

(Alex) I've just never slept with
someone for their personality.

Thank you. I learned a lot.

We should go shooting sometime.

Yeah, that would be fun.

I've been going through
sort of a hard time lately,

and I'm... I'm gonna
try some new things.

_

Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com

(Laura) "Hi, Valerie.

"I'm a 47-year-old DILF
looking for my MILF.

Kisses and bites, Marky."

- DILF?
- Marky?

Ooh.

Okay, "I regret to report that you are

"above the maximum
standard of attraction.

"Please delete your account immediately.

JK, coffee?"

Oof. Next.

[sighs] Okay.

Too sweaty.

Too smiley.

Too goatee-y.

- [phone dings]
- Whoa! There you go.

Oh, oh, come on!

Don't look at that. Don't look at that.

Please stop pretending
that I haven't seen

a dick before.

Okay, fine, but seriously.

Looks pretty serious to me.

You know what, that's harassment.

No, it's the new "hello."

[phone dings]

Oh, Dad's texting you.

He says he wants you to call him.

Ugh.

I mean, your father and I
respect each other very much,

and I will call him back later.

Nice.

[phone dings]

_

Ugh, I mean, it's
inappropriate and sleazy.

It can't possibly work.

And yet it somehow does.

Shit.

(Laura) What?

Valerie.

Couldn't just let me have
my divorce on my own, huh?

Everyone needs their
mother at a time like this.

So you've come for... dinner?

I'm here as long as you need me.

- Hey, Grandma.
- Call me Dawn.

Call her Grandma.

It makes me so happy to
see you all living together.

Well, we did it for 18
years back at the house,

which you would have
noticed if you'd been around.

[laughs] I miss your sense of humor.

So Alex tells me you're dating?

[grunts]

- Hmm?
- What are you looking at?

Comments about how I'm unlovable

and my website's a scam.

Unlovable?

- That sounds self-destructive.
- It is.

Then maybe you should stop.

It serves a purpose.

It's good to get out there.

The world is calling. You should answer.

Well, it's only been a few months, Mom.

Well, at your age, every month counts.

I smell something like smoke.

I don't smell any... oh, yeah.

Why aren't you stepping in?

It's kind of fun to watch.

- Do you hear her?
- Yeah.

Do you hear how overjoyed
about my divorce she is?

Of course she is, Val. She
gets to act like an expert.

Oh, my God, I want to murder her.

I do, I want to twist her fucking neck

- until her smug face pops off.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Stop.

- You want her gone?
- Yes.

Then just let her be right.

Whatever she says, you nod and agree.

- That's idiotic.
- It's effective.

You and Grandpa... I mean Charles...

- You were never married?
- Not officially.

We never wanted to contractually

own one another.

So you were, like,
sleeping with other people?

Naturally.

Let's practice. Okay?

- Alex...
- So, Valerie...

Global warming is a
total hoax, am I right?

- Alex, stop.
- Am I right?

- Yeah, that sounds right.
- Very good.

Best Clint Eastwood movie,

it's got to be Trouble with the Curve,

don't you think?

Such a good movie.

[sighs] It was a revelation.

See? You got it.

But you were together?

Until we split up, yes.

And how did Mom and
Alex feel about that?

I never really asked.

But we needed to. It was time.

It was organic. We
never rushed into things.

It was like I always told you.

You were so young when you
got married... too young.

This divorce is giving
you a tremendous gift.

Thanks, divorce.

[sighs] I need to vent.

- Do you have a sec?
- Mm...

- 'Cause I need...
- Um...

What?

Sorry.

Okay, you can't just show up here.

You won't return my texts.

If you want to meet, you have to go

through the lawyers.

Is that really where we are?

What do you need now?

It's time to sell the house.

Not yet.

(Drew) When?

When I'm ready.

You don't get to control everything.

- You left.
- [scoffs]

You're the one who said,
"I never want to step foot

in that house again," remember?

- [cell phone chiming]
- Oh, yeah.

I remember. I remember.

Doesn't mean I'm ready
to sell it, though.

I can box things up for you.

The leather bar stools,

- the doorknobs that you got in Big Sur.
- _

- Ugh.
- What?

Nothing.

You know what?

Until we reach an agreement,
that house... it's 50% mine,

and you are not to put it on the market.

[sighs]

- [poignant music]
- _

Are you sneaking in?

Are you hiding behind a plant?

Who are those people?

She got us a throuple's massage.

(Valerie) A what?

[cell phone chimes]

Oh, Jesus. That's three.

- Three what?
- Penis pictures.

- They're called dick pics.
- Whatever.

Same photo?

No... see, first one's an aerial shot,

and the second one's next to a remote.

Uh-huh, for perspective.

Yeah, but every remote is different, so.

Yeah, a soda can would
be a better barometer.

Probably.

Hm.

Oh, shit. Uh, here she comes.

- I'm gonna...
- Wait, wait... wait.

Where are you going?

- Um, anywhere but here.
- No, no, no.

Wait... hey, what happened
to saying yes and, you know,

nodding and agreeing?

Yeah, with words. You
don't do stuff with her.

Oh, good, you're here. We can start.

Oh, I just got called into the office.

So it looks like it's just you gals.

I understand.

And don't worry about that blogger.

Just because no one has loved you yet

doesn't mean you're unlovable.

[therapeutic music]

I'm sensing tension in her back.

Work her shoulders.

I think she knows what she's doing.

She doesn't know what
you've been through.

- It's a divorce.
- Oh, that's right.

That's what it is. It's a divorce.

You can't be so hard on yourself, dear.

We all make mistakes.

Is it better if we
just don't talk, maybe?

Have you met Drew's new partner?

[sighs] I have not.

You should, so you
can unburden yourself.

Start fresh.

How did he meet her?

[sighs]

Can we just... can we change the music?

- Is that...?
- But it's so soothing.

The thing that really gets
me down is we had chemistry.

We connected.

I mean, she was a
four. Maybe five, tops.

I could throw a shoe down Sunset,

hit 50 better looking girls.

Not that I'm perfect, but I was
definitely out of her league.

Is it wrong that I expected gratitude?

Maybe.

Maybe that's too much, but
I certainly did not expect

to be treated like a fucking monster.

- Where's Carl?
- Who?

Your dog.

Mm.

Carl. You were right.

He deserved better. I
had to give him back.

I thought you said
this was an emergency.

Huh? It is. My mom's in town.

You know how that goes.

I never met my mother.

- You're adopted?
- No.

She just left when I was young.

Lucky you.

You ready?

Let's do it.

[Ne' Richa's Dollar ]

You know what I love about a strip club?

I can't imagine.

The rules are literally
written on the wall.

You know exactly what you're getting.

No surprises, no emotions.

Just simple transactional simulated sex.

It's so pure.

[cell phone rings]

Okay, be right back. Hi.

Since I got you here, do you mind

taking care of my buddy?

Thanks.

[cell phone ringing]

Hi.

Hey, Val, what's up?

Alex? She is system... ow.

She's systematically
trying to undo me, okay?

I don't know how much
more of this I can take.

- I think you'd be surprised.
- Alex!

Listen, it's a marathon, not a sprint.

You got to pace yourself. Breathe.

Oh, it's a marathon?

Well, you abandoned me
at the starting line.

Val, you sound emotional.

I am emotional.

I'm gonna toss her off your deck.

No, don't do that.

You know she'll survive

and then you'll have to push
her around in a wheelchair.

[cell phone chimes]

Oh, come on.

What now?

It's just another penis pic.

This one's wearing a kerchief.

A kerchief? Like a bib?

No. No, it's like a bandana.

- Points for creativity?
- Okay, you know what?

(Valerie) I need you.

I can only give so much.

Voila.

Wow, you sure know how to charm a girl.

Everyone's so used to being photographed

these days that no one knows

what an honest, unselfconscious

moment looks like.

We're gonna capture one.

At a Chevron?

You got big box stores on every corner.

You got some weird little
apartments over there.

People coming and going
from all walks of life.

Sad walks of life.

Yeah, maybe. Maybe not.

There's a 40-second window
when people pump their gas.

Some people text, some people

listen to the radio.

Some just stare off into space

and take stock of their lives.

40 seconds of something, or nothing.

Watch for it.

Head for those bushes.

And don't let anybody see you.

[poignant string music]

Mm.

[knock on door]

(Dawn) Valerie?

It began in September.

(Dawn) He was feeling low
after the L.A. Times layoffs.

Started going to that biking group

in Griffith Park on Sundays.

What are you talking about?

She was pre-med and just looking

for some nice people outside of school.

He wasn't even attracted
to her at first.

You... talked to Drew?

Her car had trouble
starting one afternoon,

and he bought her a coffee
and offered to wait with her.

(Dawn) She seemed
fascinated by his life.

Oh, my God.

It was the first time in years

that he didn't feel like a total fuck-up.

His words.

(Dawn) You need to know this, dear.

[sighs]

The only way out is through.

[cell phone chimes]

[playful string music]

Ugh!

[scoffs]

I mean...

Valerie?

Valerie?

[cell phone chimes]

[sighs]

[poignant string music]

So this is a thing for you?

Taking pictures of people
while they're unaware?

Oh, sometimes.

- Do you ever feel dirty?
- Dirty?

Well, it's a fine line, right?

I mean, one day you're
taking pictures of people

at a gas station and the next,

you put a video camera
in the girls' locker room.

It's all in the name of art.

- You want anything?
- No, I'm good.

[stirring string music]

(Michael) Want to keep going?

Take me home.

(Alex) He's been gone
for, like, 30 minutes.

Is that normal?

It's whatever you want it to be.

Don't stripper talk me. I just...

What if she's taking advantage of him?

Relax. He's in good hands.

It's just, he's a very trusting person.

You know... women see
that innocent face,

and they just... they just pounce.

Oh, God.

He's probably in the champagne room

getting doused with a
$1,000 bottle of Kenwood.

Oh.

Hello.

Hi.

We'll develop tomorrow. See what we got.

That was my dad.

With his girlfriend.

Okay.

Wow.

I'm Randy.

Come on in.

Do you think sending
photos of your penis

is a good way to get
a woman's attention,

or is respectful, or
even remotely welcome?

- Um...
- Does it work for you, Randy?

Do women actually respond?

I mean, you're here.

I am literally on the verge

of getting a restraining order.

- Take it easy.
- No, Randy.

I have seen more angles of your penis

than I have of my ex-husband's.

Why didn't you look at
your husband's penis more?

Because he's too busy

plunging it into a 22
year-old grad student

who he... apparently is
also his cycling buddy.

Oh, how did I know that?

Because my mother
called him and asked him.

- Oh, no.
- Oh, yeah.

- Mm-hmm.
- You didn't want to know.

No, I did not want to know.

No. No, and now I do.

And I guess I just...

I guess I just wanted the
marriage to fix itself.

I've never heard of a
marriage fixing itself.

Oh, and now he wants to sell the house.

The house that I paid for

and filled with all
the pieces of our lives.

And then when it sells,
then that's the end, right?

Then... that's it.

The end.

God, we might not have ever been...

right together, but...

I'm just not ready for that.

But, I mean, if you were
never right together,

then why are you
still, like, holding on?

[poignant string music]

Because then my mother will be right.

She said it would never last.

[sighs] And it didn't.

And if you keep the
house, then she'll be what?

Less right?

She could tell me she's sorry.

We spend our whole lives

waiting for our parents to apologize.

They spend theirs
waiting for a thank you.

Neither of us ever gets what we want.

Hm.

You have a nice face, Randy.

You should lead with that.

[door opens and closes]

And your family?

Do they know?

Uh-huh.

It's not really the easiest
thing to hide, you know?

[both chuckle]

There's Mom.

- And that's my dad.
- [laughs]

Me and my brother. They're supportive.

Like, actually supportive, or
secretly dying on the inside?

[laughs softly]

Both.

Is, uh, is that you?

- My daughter.
- She's very cute.

13 months.

Pretty soon, she'll be walking.

And dancing.

What, bringing a kid around here,

that's like playing Russian roulette.

I don't bring her here.

Okay, so you don't see her that much?

I'm with her every
minute I'm not working.

I mean, she's got to imprint.

Imprint?

If a mom's not around
in the first few months,

her baby won't bond with her.

That's not a real thing.

Actually, there's 50 years
of research to support it.

So I've heard.

So, what happens to that
kid when they grow up?

If they don't bond?

They have attachment issues,
and it's basically impossible

for them to sustain relationships.

(Dana) It's really sad.

Hey, why aren't there any photos

of you and me when I was a baby?

Of course there are.

No, I mean in the first few months.

Like, right when I was born.

Well...

Let's see, 1980. That's right.

Queen went on tour to celebrate

their album release.

I went to a few of their shows.

Yeah. A few?

30.

Oh, they went all over the world.

Oh. How fun for you.

Who took care of me?

Everyone... your father, our friends.

Valerie, she never left your side.

Does that seem normal to you?

I've never believed in normal.

Answer the question!

You know...

I think I'm gonna give
you and Valerie some space.

They're kicking you out?

Children always blame their parents

for their problems.

It's the easiest way
to avoid responsibility.

I thought you guys were drunks.

Or, like, morbidly obese people

who never got out of bed,

but you're not like that.

You're not like that at all.

Thank you.

Where are you gonna go?

Don't worry about me, dear.

There's a man I know with an open bed.

We'll be talking.

I'd like that.

[Sufjan Stevens's Should
Have Known Better ]

I loved this house.

Me too.

I'll look into appraisers this week.

Find out what it's worth.

[cell phone chimes]

[beeps]

[sighs]

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www.addic7ed.com

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