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Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
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♪ I think you're dancing ♪
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♪ Just a little too close ♪
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- ♪ With my man... ♪
- (groaning)
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♪ With my man ♪
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00:00:14,531 --> 00:00:17,059
♪ I can see you holding him ♪
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♪ Just as tight as you can ♪
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♪ Tight as you can ♪
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♪ I wasn't born yesterday ♪
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♪ And it's easy to see ♪
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- ♪ You're making a play... ♪
- (groans)
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♪ So if you think of stirring up ♪
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- ♪ I'm gonna start a war ♪
- ♪ Start a war ♪
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♪ Yeah, I see ♪
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♪ You coming on... ♪
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IRWIN: Are-are you ready
for your... for your film?
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SAM: Wait. And go.
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- He's got the clap.
- SAM: (gasps) What?
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00:00:45,896 --> 00:00:48,423
You schmuck! You're ruining my story.
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00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:49,558
- (groans)
- (stifled laughter)
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Should've wore a jimmy hat.
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Oh, I don't wear jimmy
hats. I never have.
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- Mm-hmm.
- They impede sensation.
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And by the way...
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Who-who get...
26
00:01:00,144 --> 00:01:03,004
who gets the clap anymore, hmm?
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00:01:03,046 --> 00:01:04,873
Guys who don't wear jimmy hats.
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00:01:04,915 --> 00:01:07,109
- Oh, sheesh.
- (laughing)
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00:01:07,151 --> 00:01:11,012
The women my age stopped getting
their periods 70 years ago.
30
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My parts are grinding to a halt,
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except for my follicle
production. (laughs)
32
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Oh, my God. Me, too, Rosie. Me, too!
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(both laughing)
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00:01:20,198 --> 00:01:24,226
- But you look so beautiful.
- Oh, I look how I look.
35
00:01:24,268 --> 00:01:28,530
Ah, you know what? You'll never
believe what I just found.
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00:01:28,572 --> 00:01:31,038
I was looking through
my projects folder,
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and I found a script
written by me and...
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Tamara Gonsales. Yeah!
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(laughs)
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Tamara Gonsales? You and I.
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00:01:44,121 --> 00:01:46,974
We wrote a script together. Remember?
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SAM: Oh...
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00:01:50,399 --> 00:01:53,388
Alan, I think you're confusing me.
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You know I'm Sam, right? I'm
Phil and Murray's daughter.
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Oh... Oh, shit. (chuckles)
46
00:02:01,104 --> 00:02:03,148
This is embarrassing.
47
00:02:04,509 --> 00:02:07,495
- SAM: Oh. You okay?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Murray. God rest his soul.
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- What a pain in the ass.
- (laughter)
50
00:02:14,718 --> 00:02:18,313
- Your father was a funny man.
- Yeah.
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- Oh, and dirty.
- IRWIN: Now, wait a minute.
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I was the funniest. Your father
was the second funniest.
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Ask your mother, she'll tell you.
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Loved your mother. Oh.
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She-she was scary but classy.
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She was so mean.
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- Mean as a snake.
- Hmm.
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She's with a shvartze now.
Yeah. I heard about it.
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Rocket, you can't say that word.
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- I can. You can't.
- (laughter)
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It was delicious, her-her rudeness.
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But even wh... even when she was
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really, really, awfully mean,
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she still had this little
twinkle in her eye.
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00:02:55,192 --> 00:02:58,987
Always made me feel
like, "I got a shot."
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00:02:59,029 --> 00:03:01,223
(laughter)
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00:03:01,265 --> 00:03:04,793
- Her accent is what got me.
- Her tits are what got me.
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00:03:04,835 --> 00:03:07,128
- Irwin!
- She was gorgeous.
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00:03:07,170 --> 00:03:09,439
- She still is.
- I like that.
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A daughter who appreciates her parents.
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Not like my motherless,
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deadbeat, drug-addicted son.
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Irwin.
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00:03:19,920 --> 00:03:22,411
- Easy, yeah?
- How about this?
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00:03:22,453 --> 00:03:25,455
(speaking Yiddish)
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He's a piece of meat with two eyes.
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ROSIE: Oh...
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At least his mother is dead.
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She didn't have to live to see this.
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This guy and his silver linings.
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(laughing)
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ROCKET: Rosie.
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Oh, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
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00:03:52,283 --> 00:03:53,775
I got one for you. I got one.
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00:03:53,817 --> 00:03:55,377
I got-I got one. I got one for you.
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Okay? Um, a Murray Fox proverb.
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- (Rosie chuckling)
- IRWIN: Oh.
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00:04:02,175 --> 00:04:03,655
You get stuck...
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00:04:04,562 --> 00:04:06,288
in writing...
90
00:04:06,330 --> 00:04:09,691
- IRWIN: Huh.
- ...in marriage, in life,
91
00:04:09,733 --> 00:04:11,419
you get stuck...
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00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:14,696
"Shake the Cocktail."
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00:04:14,738 --> 00:04:16,931
- Oh, yeah!
- All right, shake the cocktail.
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00:04:16,973 --> 00:04:18,733
ALL: Shake the cocktail!
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(overlapping chatter)
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00:04:20,176 --> 00:04:22,737
- I love it. Thank you, Rocket.
- You schtuck.
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Schtuck?
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00:04:24,281 --> 00:04:27,242
He can't say schtum,
but he says schtuck!
99
00:04:27,284 --> 00:04:29,303
(laughter)
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00:04:32,610 --> 00:04:34,343
You know your sister is
in a summer blockbuster.
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TRESSA: Uh-huh.
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00:04:35,338 --> 00:04:37,919
She's gonna be the next Lara
Croft: Middle-aged Tomb Raider.
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Is that the monster one?
104
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A mother. I'm playing a mother.
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Everyone's miserable.
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00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:45,827
I was gonna complain about
the AC in my trailer.
107
00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:46,995
Well, at least the money's good.
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00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:48,930
(chuckles) Otherwise, I'd
have peaced day one.
109
00:04:48,972 --> 00:04:52,166
No, it's not. They're paying
us barely scale on this.
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00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:53,483
Not me, baby.
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00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:56,771
- Oh, damn.
- SAM: I'm making
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00:04:56,813 --> 00:04:58,773
a fraction of what the actor
who's playing my husband
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00:04:58,815 --> 00:05:01,338
is making, and nobody
knows who the hell he is.
114
00:05:01,380 --> 00:05:03,244
They're cheating on turnaround.
115
00:05:03,286 --> 00:05:05,013
No one's ever heard of union rules.
116
00:05:05,055 --> 00:05:08,283
It's a shitshow, and it's
gonna make a fortune.
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00:05:08,325 --> 00:05:09,918
TRESSA: It's a nice paycheck.
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00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:13,490
A nice paycheck you were asking
for, that's what you wanted.
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00:05:13,532 --> 00:05:15,690
There was a manager on set yesterday,
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00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:18,627
said we should consider
filing a grievance for, like,
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00:05:18,669 --> 00:05:21,322
a stunt adjustment, or
some shit like that.
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00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:22,503
MER: I'm sure your manager's
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00:05:22,545 --> 00:05:24,433
all over this, but I'm getting
Donte a stunt adjustment,
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00:05:24,475 --> 00:05:27,436
and I'm filing a grievance on his
behalf and Princess' behalf.
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00:05:27,478 --> 00:05:30,505
- You want in?
- Ooh. How much are they getting?
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00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:32,507
- 200 bucks.
- Mm.
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00:05:32,549 --> 00:05:34,643
So you should talk to
your manager, Tressa.
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00:05:34,685 --> 00:05:37,379
I mean, you're Sam Fox, number
two on the call sheet. Come on.
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00:05:37,421 --> 00:05:39,648
- Number three.
- My client's ten.
130
00:05:39,690 --> 00:05:42,851
And that makes sense, as I
tend to gravitate toward men
131
00:05:42,893 --> 00:05:45,654
of lower status in life and on the set.
132
00:05:45,696 --> 00:05:47,681
(laughs) You're so funny!
133
00:05:48,716 --> 00:05:50,024
TRESSA: Who's this manager?
134
00:05:50,066 --> 00:05:53,102
I don't know. Some
cool lady with a face.
135
00:05:53,866 --> 00:05:56,406
What cool lady with a face? You
talking about Boatie Trell?
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00:05:57,011 --> 00:05:58,500
No, not a Boatie.
137
00:05:58,542 --> 00:06:00,702
- Mer Kodis?
- That one.
138
00:06:00,744 --> 00:06:02,671
- Are these names? Really?
- Mm-hmm.
139
00:06:02,713 --> 00:06:04,238
(laughs) She make a pass at you?
140
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:07,109
What? No. Calm down.
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00:06:09,269 --> 00:06:10,704
(both laughing)
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00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,749
♪ I want to be happy, I
want to be true... ♪
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00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:17,386
I'm straight. I'm a straight girl.
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00:06:17,428 --> 00:06:19,721
- I won't tell.
- TRESSA: She's a flipper, Sam.
145
00:06:19,763 --> 00:06:22,591
Flip-per. Woo, boy,
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00:06:22,633 --> 00:06:23,925
you are right up her alley.
147
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,932
That's her thing, she likes
to flip straight girls.
148
00:06:25,974 --> 00:06:27,028
She's a flipper.
149
00:06:27,070 --> 00:06:28,997
- Stop saying flipper.
- Is she cute?
150
00:06:29,039 --> 00:06:31,158
I dated a lesbian once. Business school.
151
00:06:32,385 --> 00:06:35,269
She's got to be cute if she's
a successful serial flipper.
152
00:06:35,311 --> 00:06:36,384
I don't know.
153
00:06:36,426 --> 00:06:38,440
For the record, I don't
hate where this is going.
154
00:06:38,482 --> 00:06:40,041
I always wanted you
to have a girl phase.
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00:06:40,083 --> 00:06:41,509
- You did?
- Mm-hmm.
156
00:06:41,551 --> 00:06:42,890
- I didn't.
- Mm-hmm?
157
00:06:42,932 --> 00:06:45,884
I mean, I don't think it's in me.
158
00:06:45,926 --> 00:06:47,031
I mean,
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00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:49,784
I like it... in me.
160
00:06:49,826 --> 00:06:52,192
- Mom, gross.
- (laughs)
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00:06:52,234 --> 00:06:53,893
You guys are so binary.
162
00:06:54,741 --> 00:06:56,958
I'm not sure what that means,
163
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,960
but I'm pretty sure I'm
all about that "D."
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00:06:59,002 --> 00:07:01,062
Yeah, I can't hear any more
of this. ♪ La, la, la... ♪
165
00:07:01,104 --> 00:07:02,363
(laughs)
166
00:07:02,405 --> 00:07:04,254
I'm with Frankie... I don't
see sexual preference.
167
00:07:04,296 --> 00:07:06,074
That is such bullshit.
168
00:07:06,116 --> 00:07:08,385
Mer Kodis is danger, okay? Listen to me.
169
00:07:08,427 --> 00:07:10,807
Yup, very, so straight.
170
00:07:11,734 --> 00:07:13,642
Is that something
people are still doing?
171
00:07:13,684 --> 00:07:16,578
Yup. Still doing straight.
172
00:07:16,620 --> 00:07:19,814
I do straight with
straight men... people.
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00:07:19,856 --> 00:07:23,151
(both chuckling)
174
00:07:23,193 --> 00:07:25,053
(clears throat)
175
00:07:25,095 --> 00:07:26,421
SAM: I've said nothing.
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00:07:26,463 --> 00:07:28,723
She was on set, giving
her client advice.
177
00:07:28,765 --> 00:07:30,492
I saw her for, like, ten seconds,
178
00:07:30,534 --> 00:07:32,741
and now all of a sudden
you're acting like
179
00:07:32,783 --> 00:07:34,929
we're running away together.
180
00:07:34,971 --> 00:07:38,900
Jesus. You're so sensitive and jealous.
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00:07:38,942 --> 00:07:40,502
I am not jealous.
182
00:07:40,544 --> 00:07:44,272
Okay. Okay. Can we not
have a feelings talk?
183
00:07:44,314 --> 00:07:47,576
I'm not having a feelings talk,
I'm just giving you some tips.
184
00:07:47,618 --> 00:07:49,967
I'm good. I'm all good.
185
00:07:50,929 --> 00:07:53,306
I feel like you just
had a feelings talk.
186
00:07:56,910 --> 00:07:59,420
- Hello! Darling...
- Hi.
187
00:07:59,462 --> 00:08:01,790
- ...look what I brought you.
- Oh, Phil. I don't.
188
00:08:01,832 --> 00:08:03,925
- Hi, Walter.
- Hello, Sam.
189
00:08:03,967 --> 00:08:06,260
Don't bring that into the house.
I have five of those already.
190
00:08:06,302 --> 00:08:07,996
Yes, but it's a manual can opener.
191
00:08:08,038 --> 00:08:09,598
- I told you I don't want you to bring
- If you mean to...
192
00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:11,099
- any more stuff to my house.
- Well, I want you to have it
193
00:08:11,141 --> 00:08:12,333
and I'm going to leave it, anyway.
194
00:08:12,375 --> 00:08:13,434
For the lady.
195
00:08:13,476 --> 00:08:16,270
We have to think about the scenarios
196
00:08:16,312 --> 00:08:17,672
of disaster very carefully.
197
00:08:17,714 --> 00:08:19,492
- Mm.
- I'm the president
198
00:08:19,534 --> 00:08:21,275
of the emergency preparedness committee.
199
00:08:21,317 --> 00:08:22,977
Voted unanimously into office.
200
00:08:23,019 --> 00:08:25,547
Well, I've seen my share of disasters.
201
00:08:25,589 --> 00:08:26,607
(both chuckle)
202
00:08:29,422 --> 00:08:31,385
Are we staying for dinner, Phil?
203
00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:33,354
Dinner. I hadn't thought...
204
00:08:33,396 --> 00:08:36,645
No, no, no, now, we
don't want to intrude.
205
00:08:36,687 --> 00:08:39,360
What's this? Risotto?
206
00:08:39,402 --> 00:08:41,462
- Mm.
- Oh, Walter, we must.
207
00:08:41,504 --> 00:08:42,497
(grunts)
208
00:08:42,539 --> 00:08:43,791
WALTER: Then we must.
209
00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:48,803
Hmm. It's interesting
how plain it tastes.
210
00:08:48,845 --> 00:08:51,364
- (stifled laugh)
- (doorbell rings)
211
00:08:56,236 --> 00:08:57,378
Hi.
212
00:08:57,420 --> 00:08:58,412
- Hey.
- Hi.
213
00:08:58,454 --> 00:08:59,881
I know who you are.
214
00:08:59,923 --> 00:09:01,850
- Hi. Reiki..
- Sam.
215
00:09:01,892 --> 00:09:04,418
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to finally meet you.
216
00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:05,754
What's up?
217
00:09:05,796 --> 00:09:08,523
Sorrow, your dad's here.
218
00:09:08,565 --> 00:09:10,692
They've been giving each other tattoos.
219
00:09:10,734 --> 00:09:13,528
She's on the toilet.
220
00:09:13,570 --> 00:09:15,930
Whoa, is that Sharpie?
221
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:18,266
Are you crazy? It's eyeliner.
222
00:09:18,308 --> 00:09:20,201
- Of course.
- Can Sorrow
223
00:09:20,243 --> 00:09:21,736
and Pepper sleep over tonight?
224
00:09:21,778 --> 00:09:24,072
- I don't know, it's a...
- Please?
225
00:09:24,114 --> 00:09:25,506
- We're talking about a school night.
- Please, please.
226
00:09:25,548 --> 00:09:26,741
How do we feel about that?
227
00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:28,577
- I'm good.
- I'm good.
228
00:09:28,619 --> 00:09:30,444
Yes!
229
00:09:30,486 --> 00:09:32,346
- So, come on in.
- Great.
230
00:09:32,388 --> 00:09:34,115
Did you guys eat?
231
00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:36,017
- No.
- Stay. Stay.
232
00:09:36,059 --> 00:09:37,686
It smells delicious.
233
00:09:37,728 --> 00:09:40,388
- It is delicious. Come on.
- Okay.
234
00:09:40,430 --> 00:09:45,126
- Don't you want to check the car?
- (making monkey sounds)
235
00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:47,295
Oh, God, yes, yes.
236
00:09:47,337 --> 00:09:48,930
- What...
- Great.
237
00:09:48,972 --> 00:09:50,732
- What are you checking?
- Just simmer down.
238
00:09:50,774 --> 00:09:53,968
Oh, your art is so beautiful.
239
00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,637
I love it.
240
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,371
Yeah, I love it, too.
241
00:09:57,413 --> 00:09:59,240
- Yeah.
- Come on.
242
00:09:59,282 --> 00:10:00,942
Let me wine you and dine you.
243
00:10:00,984 --> 00:10:02,243
Thank you.
244
00:10:02,285 --> 00:10:04,946
- Reiki, this is my mom, Phil.
- Hi.
245
00:10:04,988 --> 00:10:07,985
- Hello.
- And her special friend Walter.
246
00:10:08,027 --> 00:10:09,784
- Walter, hi.
- Nice to meet you.
247
00:10:09,826 --> 00:10:11,753
- That's my bro Marion.
- Hello. Nice to meet you.
248
00:10:11,795 --> 00:10:13,254
- And the rest.
- Hey.
249
00:10:13,296 --> 00:10:16,090
- I'm Rich, hi. I'm the rest.
- Hi, Rich. Hi.
250
00:10:16,132 --> 00:10:18,459
- Red or white?
- Anything nonalcoholic.
251
00:10:18,501 --> 00:10:20,673
- All right, I got you.
- So, you're the decorator.
252
00:10:20,715 --> 00:10:21,733
I am.
253
00:10:21,775 --> 00:10:23,823
You're with Sunny's bum of a husband?
254
00:10:24,773 --> 00:10:26,033
You should meet my mother.
255
00:10:26,075 --> 00:10:27,969
(Marion and Sam chuckle)
256
00:10:28,011 --> 00:10:30,238
(laughs) He's her ex-husband.
257
00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:32,774
And I find him charming in every way.
258
00:10:32,816 --> 00:10:35,944
- Every way?
- Mm-hmm. All the ways.
259
00:10:35,986 --> 00:10:38,246
Well, there's a lid for every pot.
260
00:10:38,288 --> 00:10:40,982
Yeah, well, his lid
certainly fits my pot.
261
00:10:41,024 --> 00:10:43,643
- (laughter)
- Cheers.
262
00:10:45,578 --> 00:10:47,856
Cheers.
263
00:10:47,898 --> 00:10:49,257
Everyone...
264
00:10:49,299 --> 00:10:52,460
this is Dexter. Hello.
265
00:10:52,502 --> 00:10:54,963
- The fuck?
- And his handler Linda,
266
00:10:55,005 --> 00:10:56,530
- as required by state law.
- Hi. Jump.
267
00:10:56,572 --> 00:10:58,584
Yeah, check this out.
He jumps. Watch this.
268
00:10:58,626 --> 00:10:59,434
LINDA: Come on.
269
00:10:59,476 --> 00:11:00,635
- (exclaims)
- JEFF: Look at that.
270
00:11:00,677 --> 00:11:02,503
- Yeah.
- Get it off me. Get it off me.
271
00:11:02,545 --> 00:11:03,972
Get it off.
272
00:11:04,014 --> 00:11:07,030
SAM: My God. Frankie! Jason!
273
00:11:07,072 --> 00:11:10,044
Girls, get down here right now!
274
00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:12,013
- Are you okay, Mom? It's okay.
- Stay.
275
00:11:12,055 --> 00:11:13,447
I love monkeys.
276
00:11:13,489 --> 00:11:14,827
She does. She loves 'em, yeah.
277
00:11:14,869 --> 00:11:16,550
Her birthday's next week,
so I found her one.
278
00:11:16,592 --> 00:11:18,119
We've been hanging out all day.
279
00:11:18,161 --> 00:11:20,855
- (all gasp)
- (Rich chuckles)
280
00:11:20,897 --> 00:11:22,657
Oh.
281
00:11:22,699 --> 00:11:24,410
Mom, Mom, can we keep it?
282
00:11:24,452 --> 00:11:25,576
Well, I mean, it's just a rental, so...
283
00:11:25,618 --> 00:11:28,012
FRANKIE: Can we rent it?
Mom, can we rent it? Mom?
284
00:11:28,054 --> 00:11:29,230
- Bro!
- Mom, please.
285
00:11:29,272 --> 00:11:32,455
He's here now. Play with him now. Ow.
286
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,642
(Sam laughing)
287
00:11:41,684 --> 00:11:44,713
That's it? He catches
a grape? That's, uh,
288
00:11:44,755 --> 00:11:46,748
a little underwhelming.
289
00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:47,882
A grape out of your ear, maybe.
290
00:11:47,924 --> 00:11:49,350
You should get him some
cymbals or something.
291
00:11:49,392 --> 00:11:51,543
Honey, you want to throw
a grape to the monkey?
292
00:11:52,077 --> 00:11:53,755
It feels very intense
293
00:11:53,797 --> 00:11:55,690
to have a primate in the house.
294
00:11:55,732 --> 00:11:56,784
Mm.
295
00:11:58,618 --> 00:12:01,930
Oh. She's not into it.
296
00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:03,164
- You see his shorts?
- Yeah, I did.
297
00:12:03,206 --> 00:12:04,925
- Is that what those are?
- Yeah, those are shorts.
298
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:09,203
Mm...
299
00:12:09,245 --> 00:12:12,006
What about Jeff's new lady? I mean...
300
00:12:12,048 --> 00:12:14,008
holy crap, right?
301
00:12:14,050 --> 00:12:15,543
I know. (inhales)
302
00:12:15,585 --> 00:12:17,211
- That face.
- Yeah, you think it's real,
303
00:12:17,253 --> 00:12:18,947
- or work done?
- I don't know.
304
00:12:18,989 --> 00:12:21,582
But good for him. Wow.
305
00:12:21,624 --> 00:12:23,117
How old do you think she is?
306
00:12:23,159 --> 00:12:25,286
Who cares? She's fantastic. So sexy.
307
00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:28,089
Mm.
308
00:12:28,131 --> 00:12:32,093
(coughs, snorts)
309
00:12:32,135 --> 00:12:34,062
It's still half plus seven, right?
310
00:12:34,104 --> 00:12:36,364
(coughs) I mean, that's the rule.
311
00:12:36,406 --> 00:12:39,367
Half... (coughs) Half
your age, plus seven.
312
00:12:39,409 --> 00:12:41,269
Wow, that's strong.
313
00:12:41,311 --> 00:12:43,571
Well, I'm breaking that rule.
My new boyfriend's 25.
314
00:12:43,613 --> 00:12:44,705
Get out of here.
315
00:12:44,747 --> 00:12:46,099
Mm-hmm.
316
00:12:47,868 --> 00:12:49,744
(Marion coughs)
317
00:12:49,786 --> 00:12:52,781
I wonder if his friends
whisper about me like this.
318
00:12:52,823 --> 00:12:55,216
Whether or not you've had injections
319
00:12:55,258 --> 00:12:56,650
in your lips, you mean?
320
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:58,719
How dare you.
321
00:12:58,761 --> 00:12:59,821
Of course I have.
322
00:12:59,863 --> 00:13:01,555
(garage door opening)
323
00:13:01,597 --> 00:13:03,884
(Rich laughs)
324
00:13:05,352 --> 00:13:08,596
(coughs) Oh, Jesus, you
guys hotboxed the garage.
325
00:13:08,638 --> 00:13:09,798
- Dinner's ready.
- You want? You want?
326
00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:11,099
Yerp.
327
00:13:11,141 --> 00:13:13,726
(coughing) Does she...
know that I'm... out here?
328
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,737
RICH: Careful, it's really strong.
329
00:13:16,779 --> 00:13:18,672
Uh, yeah.
330
00:13:18,714 --> 00:13:20,474
- Is this your boyfriend's?
- What? Yeah.
331
00:13:20,516 --> 00:13:21,943
That's not old people weed.
332
00:13:21,985 --> 00:13:24,100
This'll kill you. I can't have any more.
333
00:13:24,142 --> 00:13:25,646
- I can.
- I used to have to smoke nine joints.
334
00:13:25,688 --> 00:13:27,615
Now it's one hit and...
335
00:13:27,657 --> 00:13:30,351
- Oh, yeah.
- ...I'm a dolphin.
336
00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:33,521
- RICH: Oh... oh, wow.
- MARION: Yeah.
337
00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:35,156
- RICH: How long were we there?
- (Tressa whoops)
338
00:13:35,198 --> 00:13:38,126
- RICH: Hours, days...
- TRESSA: No. 30 minutes.
339
00:13:38,168 --> 00:13:39,327
- RICH: Is that it?
- TRESSA: Yeah.
340
00:13:39,369 --> 00:13:40,962
- I came looking for you...
- Oh, that's good.
341
00:13:41,004 --> 00:13:42,263
...after 20 minutes.
342
00:13:42,305 --> 00:13:44,265
MARION: Is it weird that
I can't feel my hair?
343
00:13:44,307 --> 00:13:46,434
- RICH: No, that's not so...
- MARION: I have so little left.
344
00:13:46,476 --> 00:13:48,044
TRESSA: Can you usually feel your hair?
345
00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:51,840
- SAM: You know, and then you get
- (phone ringing)
346
00:13:51,882 --> 00:13:53,207
the onions and the shallots.
347
00:13:53,249 --> 00:13:55,509
- RICH: Mm-hmm.
- SAM: And, um,
348
00:13:55,551 --> 00:13:59,113
you can either use, if you
don't have any tomatoes...
349
00:13:59,155 --> 00:14:02,450
- Oh.
- What?! My baby.
350
00:14:02,492 --> 00:14:06,620
Oh, oh, hi, baby!
351
00:14:06,662 --> 00:14:07,721
Hi, Mom.
352
00:14:07,763 --> 00:14:11,025
Hi from college. We're making dinner.
353
00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:13,461
- Risotto. Say hi to everybody.
- Ooh.
354
00:14:13,503 --> 00:14:15,463
- Hi, darling Max.
- Hey, Max.
355
00:14:15,505 --> 00:14:18,499
Hi. Oh, hi, Gram. Hi, Walter.
356
00:14:18,541 --> 00:14:20,201
Is it cold in the tundra?
357
00:14:20,243 --> 00:14:22,536
I haven't seen my legs
in, like, three weeks.
358
00:14:22,578 --> 00:14:23,671
(laughter)
359
00:14:23,713 --> 00:14:24,839
You're wearing a tank top.
360
00:14:24,881 --> 00:14:27,008
Oh, I know, we, like, crank up the heat.
361
00:14:27,050 --> 00:14:28,977
- MAX: Mom, I need to tell you...
- We got a monkey.
362
00:14:29,019 --> 00:14:32,046
- Hmm?
- Oh, my God! (laughing)
363
00:14:32,088 --> 00:14:34,421
You wait until I leave to get a monkey?
364
00:14:35,059 --> 00:14:37,852
- I don't know. Not ours.
- Oh.
365
00:14:37,894 --> 00:14:40,688
Did you order those Korean face masks?
366
00:14:40,730 --> 00:14:42,115
Yes, I did.
367
00:14:42,866 --> 00:14:45,860
(Sam, Max laugh)
368
00:14:45,902 --> 00:14:49,663
Honey, so how are you?
Are you making friends?
369
00:14:49,705 --> 00:14:51,332
Yeah, it's, uh, it's great.
370
00:14:51,374 --> 00:14:53,501
Everyone's really chill, you know.
371
00:14:53,543 --> 00:14:55,103
I mean, it's different.
372
00:14:55,145 --> 00:14:56,670
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
373
00:14:56,712 --> 00:14:59,073
That's good. I'm so proud of you.
374
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:02,443
So, Mom, I'm pretty sure I'm
gonna finish the semester.
375
00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:05,379
- But...
- Oh, I got to serve the plates now.
376
00:15:05,421 --> 00:15:07,181
I got to serve the... the...
377
00:15:07,223 --> 00:15:09,117
Finish... finish the semester?
378
00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:12,386
- She may. Pretty sure.
- She may finish the semester.
379
00:15:12,428 --> 00:15:14,622
(laughing)
380
00:15:14,664 --> 00:15:17,926
We're doing a pop-up
restaurant in Echo Park.
381
00:15:17,968 --> 00:15:19,193
- Oh, really?
- What?
382
00:15:19,235 --> 00:15:20,394
- Yeah.
- That's right.
383
00:15:20,436 --> 00:15:23,197
Limited menu, mostly
barbecue. Small bites.
384
00:15:23,239 --> 00:15:25,033
Gauge investor interest.
385
00:15:25,075 --> 00:15:27,316
- Hmm.
- Aw, they're gonna love it.
386
00:15:27,358 --> 00:15:28,903
Yeah, he's a natural.
387
00:15:28,945 --> 00:15:30,371
I do a few things well.
388
00:15:30,413 --> 00:15:31,906
- Not like Sam.
- Aw.
389
00:15:31,948 --> 00:15:33,975
I didn't know you cooked.
390
00:15:34,017 --> 00:15:36,794
Well, you know, Sunny hates eating.
391
00:15:38,522 --> 00:15:39,613
Mm.
392
00:15:39,655 --> 00:15:41,515
PHYLLIS: I don't like
men in the kitchen.
393
00:15:41,557 --> 00:15:43,417
It seems undignified. Do you know,
394
00:15:43,459 --> 00:15:46,254
my father severed the
top of his thumb off,
395
00:15:46,296 --> 00:15:49,557
and I didn't notice, but it had
gone right into the pastry,
396
00:15:49,599 --> 00:15:50,824
and I rolled it up.
397
00:15:50,866 --> 00:15:53,327
I think I ate a bit of
it, or just the nail.
398
00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:54,462
(laughing)
399
00:15:54,504 --> 00:15:56,630
MARION: What is...
400
00:15:56,672 --> 00:15:58,858
- happening?
- But I've never told it.
401
00:15:59,892 --> 00:16:01,970
Did you ever hear this story?
402
00:16:02,012 --> 00:16:04,738
- Hello, hello, hello.
- Just the nail?
403
00:16:04,780 --> 00:16:06,899
- MARK: Oh.
- SUNNY: Hi.
404
00:16:09,636 --> 00:16:10,928
- Hello.
- Hi.
405
00:16:16,543 --> 00:16:19,587
Uh, am I interrupting?
406
00:16:19,629 --> 00:16:22,807
I just, um... Sorrow!
407
00:16:23,980 --> 00:16:25,693
(clears throat) Uh...
408
00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:27,361
she's staying.
409
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:29,930
Yeah, they're doing,
like, a sleepover thing.
410
00:16:29,972 --> 00:16:31,499
I thought I was... I mean, I'm staying
411
00:16:31,541 --> 00:16:33,167
at the house tonight, so...
412
00:16:33,209 --> 00:16:34,168
Hi, Mark.
413
00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:35,769
(laughs) Hi.
414
00:16:35,811 --> 00:16:38,272
SAM: You guys, come in.
415
00:16:38,314 --> 00:16:39,707
Join us, come on.
416
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,775
I made lemon risotto.
417
00:16:41,817 --> 00:16:43,677
It's got, like, a million
trillion calories.
418
00:16:43,719 --> 00:16:45,113
So good.
419
00:16:45,155 --> 00:16:46,673
Oh, it's so good.
420
00:16:47,707 --> 00:16:49,183
- Hi, hi, hi.
- Hi, I'm Mark.
421
00:16:49,225 --> 00:16:50,954
- Mwah. Hi, hi.
- Hi.
422
00:16:50,996 --> 00:16:51,886
Pleasure.
423
00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:53,741
Marion. I didn't know you were in town.
424
00:16:53,783 --> 00:16:55,956
- Hello, gorgeous.
- MARK: Mark. Hi, there.
425
00:16:55,998 --> 00:16:58,159
- Right this way, table waiting.
- Hi.
426
00:16:58,201 --> 00:17:00,361
- Hi, honey.
- Hi.
427
00:17:00,403 --> 00:17:01,829
SAM: Oh, good. Good. Okay.
428
00:17:01,871 --> 00:17:03,231
You guys sit together. You can talk
429
00:17:03,273 --> 00:17:05,066
about money and Republican-y stuff,
430
00:17:05,108 --> 00:17:07,801
- and I'll get you guys some bowls.
- MARION: Ha, ha.
431
00:17:07,843 --> 00:17:09,429
I'll be right back.
432
00:17:11,411 --> 00:17:14,175
- So you're a Republican?
- Yes. Yes I am.
433
00:17:14,217 --> 00:17:16,710
- Still?
- Mm...
434
00:17:16,752 --> 00:17:19,880
- But he loves the gays.
- True. Can't get enough.
435
00:17:19,922 --> 00:17:22,316
- (soft laughter)
- SUNNY: Oh, um,
436
00:17:22,358 --> 00:17:25,319
Mark and I drank one of
your bottles of kombucha.
437
00:17:25,361 --> 00:17:27,988
- I'll replace it, I...
- No, it's no big deal.
438
00:17:28,030 --> 00:17:29,757
PHYLLIS: I'm sorry, I'm confused.
439
00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:32,726
Do you all live together,
like in a commune?
440
00:17:32,768 --> 00:17:35,054
- (soft laughter)
- (chuckles): Oh. No.
441
00:17:36,323 --> 00:17:38,332
I can't even share a bathroom. No.
442
00:17:38,374 --> 00:17:40,101
SUNNY: We share the house.
443
00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:42,770
The... the kids stay put. We, um,
444
00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:45,173
- alternate days.
- You what?
445
00:17:45,215 --> 00:17:46,740
Sounds dreadful.
446
00:17:46,782 --> 00:17:48,541
It's called nesting, dear.
447
00:17:48,583 --> 00:17:50,708
I can hear you. You don't have to shout.
448
00:17:50,750 --> 00:17:52,280
- It's working well.
- MARION: Yeah,
449
00:17:52,322 --> 00:17:53,947
the kids don't have to
move around, I get it.
450
00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:55,349
RICH: I thought the whole
point of getting divorced
451
00:17:55,391 --> 00:17:56,784
was that you don't have to get annoyed
452
00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:58,452
at the empty pickle jar
in the fridge anymore,
453
00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,788
with the single pickle
floating around like a turd.
454
00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:04,425
I've always felt that about
a single pickle in a jar.
455
00:18:04,467 --> 00:18:05,893
- Looks like a turd?
- Yeah.
456
00:18:05,935 --> 00:18:07,128
Or that's the whole reason for divorce?
457
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,762
- (chuckles)
- SUNNY: Jeff loves
458
00:18:08,804 --> 00:18:11,432
to leave his laundry in the hamper,
459
00:18:11,474 --> 00:18:13,701
like there's some magic laundry fairy
460
00:18:13,743 --> 00:18:15,703
that's just gonna go,
you know, like, "Poof."
461
00:18:15,745 --> 00:18:18,038
(chuckles) Hmm.
462
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,400
(sighs) That's... that's hilarious.
463
00:18:20,442 --> 00:18:23,059
Yeah. That happened once in six months.
464
00:18:23,101 --> 00:18:24,878
So...
465
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:26,747
Sounds awfully complicated.
466
00:18:26,789 --> 00:18:29,817
In our day, we just stayed
married and had affairs.
467
00:18:29,859 --> 00:18:32,179
(grunts)
468
00:18:37,849 --> 00:18:40,661
- MARK: Mm.
- PHYLLIS: Oh, come on, darling.
469
00:18:40,703 --> 00:18:42,062
Eat up.
470
00:18:42,104 --> 00:18:43,797
(chuckles)
471
00:18:43,839 --> 00:18:45,233
That's really good.
472
00:18:45,275 --> 00:18:46,500
- You made this?
- SAM: Thank you. Oh, yeah.
473
00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:48,796
- MARK: Lovely, really good.
- Thank you.
474
00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:53,607
- Yeah, it's the framboise.
- Oh, is that what gives it that
475
00:18:53,649 --> 00:18:55,609
- little bit of brown there?
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
476
00:18:55,651 --> 00:18:57,911
It smells so good. Bro, smell.
477
00:18:57,953 --> 00:18:59,580
Dessert's for children
and people don't care
478
00:18:59,622 --> 00:19:01,480
what they look like. We need to talk.
479
00:19:02,028 --> 00:19:04,752
Oh. That's my brother's serious voice.
480
00:19:04,794 --> 00:19:07,988
I want to talk to you about
Phil's mental state.
481
00:19:08,030 --> 00:19:09,657
Well, I don't.
482
00:19:09,699 --> 00:19:11,625
For example, she shouldn't
be driving a car.
483
00:19:11,667 --> 00:19:13,494
Oh, Jesus.
484
00:19:13,536 --> 00:19:15,129
Can you just please give this to Duke?
485
00:19:15,171 --> 00:19:17,190
(groans)
486
00:19:18,225 --> 00:19:20,227
(groans)
487
00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:24,438
(groans)
488
00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,499
(insects trilling)
489
00:19:28,568 --> 00:19:30,237
(sighs)
490
00:19:36,046 --> 00:19:38,098
You've been saying this
for ten years now.
491
00:19:38,140 --> 00:19:41,017
Every time you see her, you
want to sell the house,
492
00:19:41,059 --> 00:19:43,103
take away her car and put her in a home.
493
00:19:43,145 --> 00:19:46,840
She lost her American Express
card four times this summer.
494
00:19:46,882 --> 00:19:48,130
Yes, four.
495
00:19:48,172 --> 00:19:49,630
She lost her phone twice.
496
00:19:49,672 --> 00:19:52,657
And when she does her answer her
phone, she does it in an accent.
497
00:19:52,699 --> 00:19:54,067
- Not English.
- Yeah.
498
00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:57,188
That's because she gets
so many telemarketers.
499
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,234
She doesn't want them to know it's her.
500
00:19:59,276 --> 00:20:01,191
(accent): Hello? (chuckles)
501
00:20:02,211 --> 00:20:03,477
(regular voice): That's just smart.
502
00:20:03,519 --> 00:20:06,462
You won't think it's funny
when she really hurts herself
503
00:20:06,504 --> 00:20:08,215
or someone else.
504
00:20:08,257 --> 00:20:10,218
Let me ask you something.
505
00:20:10,260 --> 00:20:13,086
Do you have any intention
of moving to L.A.
506
00:20:13,128 --> 00:20:15,602
and driving her to bridge every Tuesday?
507
00:20:15,644 --> 00:20:17,658
Or picking her up from
Ross Dress for Less
508
00:20:17,700 --> 00:20:21,147
or Jewish Council Thrift
on an hourly basis?
509
00:20:21,189 --> 00:20:22,863
I didn't think so.
510
00:20:22,905 --> 00:20:26,567
So, please, bro, hoe your own row.
511
00:20:26,609 --> 00:20:29,203
What is my row, Sam?
512
00:20:29,245 --> 00:20:31,793
You know. Doing bank shit.
513
00:20:31,835 --> 00:20:34,539
Money. Being afraid of your wife.
514
00:20:34,581 --> 00:20:36,510
Basically never doing anything
515
00:20:36,552 --> 00:20:40,375
to help me, ever. I handle Phil.
516
00:20:42,275 --> 00:20:44,277
(door closes)
517
00:20:47,414 --> 00:20:50,190
God...
518
00:20:50,232 --> 00:20:52,192
He's right, Cookie.
519
00:20:52,234 --> 00:20:54,695
(sighs) Could you and Mom
520
00:20:54,737 --> 00:20:56,864
have gone a little bit easier on him?
521
00:20:56,906 --> 00:20:59,733
He's so wound up. He's got
such a chip on his shoulder.
522
00:20:59,775 --> 00:21:01,602
It wasn't intentional.
523
00:21:01,644 --> 00:21:03,036
He's the firstborn.
524
00:21:03,078 --> 00:21:04,872
The burned pancake.
525
00:21:04,914 --> 00:21:07,241
And the second child is like a rewrite.
526
00:21:07,283 --> 00:21:09,209
Always comes out a little better.
527
00:21:09,251 --> 00:21:10,711
Dad.
528
00:21:10,753 --> 00:21:13,080
- Yes?
- Let me ask you something.
529
00:21:13,122 --> 00:21:14,915
Mm-hmm?
530
00:21:14,957 --> 00:21:18,051
Do you think I should
take Phil's car away?
531
00:21:18,093 --> 00:21:19,453
Put her in a home?
532
00:21:19,495 --> 00:21:20,957
Let me ask you something.
533
00:21:21,924 --> 00:21:24,158
You ever win a knife
fight with a midget?
534
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,102
(mouths)
535
00:21:30,690 --> 00:21:34,502
Whoa.
536
00:21:34,544 --> 00:21:37,237
(sighs, groans)
537
00:21:37,279 --> 00:21:38,739
Uh, Truman Capote?
538
00:21:38,781 --> 00:21:41,008
- Long time ago.
- Very fat. Very, very, very fat.
539
00:21:41,050 --> 00:21:43,611
- (laughter)
- Uh, Winston Churchill. Chubby Checker.
540
00:21:43,653 --> 00:21:45,145
- Ponytail. With a ponytail.
- TRESSA: No, with a beard.
541
00:21:45,187 --> 00:21:47,448
- The, ugh...
- MARION: Jackie Gleason.
542
00:21:47,490 --> 00:21:50,083
- Fatty Arbuckle!
- Warrior. Rode a-rode a horse.
543
00:21:50,125 --> 00:21:52,853
- Fat horse rider?
- A very fat Oriental.
544
00:21:52,895 --> 00:21:55,489
- Other team!
- Genghis Khan.
545
00:21:55,531 --> 00:21:56,691
- Yes!
- (whooping)
546
00:21:56,733 --> 00:21:58,096
Phil, you cannot help them.
547
00:21:58,138 --> 00:22:00,301
I'm not under your control, darling.
548
00:22:00,343 --> 00:22:01,762
FRANKIE: It's upside down.
549
00:22:01,804 --> 00:22:04,298
- MARK: Give!
- (indistinct chatter)
550
00:22:04,340 --> 00:22:05,833
FRANKIE: Black-and-white,
black-and-white.
551
00:22:05,875 --> 00:22:09,136
- MARION: Penguin!
- Yes!
552
00:22:09,178 --> 00:22:12,373
- PHYLLIS: That was good.
- MARION: Pickup truck.
553
00:22:12,415 --> 00:22:14,642
♪ No one's sleeping tonight ♪
554
00:22:14,684 --> 00:22:18,671
♪ I'm not afraid to go ♪
555
00:22:20,573 --> 00:22:23,984
♪ I've been up for too long... ♪
556
00:22:24,026 --> 00:22:27,388
Hey, kiddo.
557
00:22:27,430 --> 00:22:29,390
What are you doing?
558
00:22:29,432 --> 00:22:31,392
♪ Tell the story ♪
559
00:22:31,434 --> 00:22:34,027
♪ Made me scared to sleep ♪
560
00:22:34,069 --> 00:22:36,397
- ♪ If we stay late ♪
- Oh...
561
00:22:36,439 --> 00:22:40,668
♪ Have a little time with you ♪
562
00:22:40,710 --> 00:22:42,970
- (phone chimes)
- That's a good girl.
563
00:22:43,012 --> 00:22:45,432
♪ And I'm out for too long... ♪
564
00:22:47,767 --> 00:22:49,643
Here.
565
00:22:49,685 --> 00:22:52,012
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
566
00:22:52,054 --> 00:22:54,774
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
567
00:23:00,079 --> 00:23:03,023
♪ You don't believe in faith ♪
568
00:23:03,065 --> 00:23:05,493
♪ So there's a chance I take ♪
569
00:23:05,535 --> 00:23:08,396
♪ On the ocean every hour ♪
570
00:23:08,438 --> 00:23:12,391
♪ Waiting for you ♪
571
00:23:13,993 --> 00:23:18,005
♪ And you're taking too long ♪
572
00:23:18,047 --> 00:23:20,099
(sighs)
573
00:23:21,934 --> 00:23:24,512
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
574
00:23:24,554 --> 00:23:27,365
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
575
00:23:27,407 --> 00:23:32,035
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
576
00:23:32,077 --> 00:23:34,888
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
577
00:23:34,930 --> 00:23:37,584
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
578
00:23:49,696 --> 00:23:52,072
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
579
00:23:52,114 --> 00:23:54,701
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
580
00:24:00,039 --> 00:24:02,583
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
581
00:24:02,625 --> 00:24:05,044
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh... ♪
41554
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